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Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode of Alchemy. This I'm your else, Craig, Yes,

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Speaker 1: that's Craig. What? Why? What? What do you know me? Tom?

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Speaker 1: Uh huh No no, no, I wasn't in that. No,

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Speaker 1: that's another guy. That was another guy. So you know

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Speaker 1: my name and what I sound like. But you're associating

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Speaker 1: me with somebody else's credits and career entirely. No, you're

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Speaker 1: a sociopath. Let's meet and or possibly greet today's Alchemist,

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Speaker 1: shall we? Let's start with Mr Jessica Lowe, otherwise known

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Speaker 1: as Chris Alvarado. Chris, what work of art always makes

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Speaker 1: you cry? That's a great question. Could be a movie,

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Speaker 1: a book, a song, a painting. I think I think musicals.

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Speaker 1: I think musicals always make me cry. Um, I was even.

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Speaker 1: I was just watching the most recent West Side Story

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Speaker 1: um the other night, which I didn't particularly love, but

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Speaker 1: I got teary eyed. I love I love a musical.

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Speaker 1: I love a musical. When uh, when they killed Riff

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Speaker 1: and Bernardo spoilers sorry, I mean I started crying. Um Um,

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Speaker 1: I want to be in a medicus. I started crying.

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Speaker 1: I just I love that song, and I just I

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Speaker 1: love musicals. I just love musicals. Have I said that enough?

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Speaker 1: I could cry right now. Thank you, Chris, thank you.

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Speaker 1: Let's also welcome Jackie Gonzalez to Ruthie. Hello, thank you

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Speaker 1: for welcoming me. Thank you, Jackie. It's three am, not now,

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Speaker 1: but in this hypothetical, yes, yes it's three am. You're

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Speaker 1: watching television. What are you watching at three am? I'm

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Speaker 1: probably trying to get back to sleep. So I'm going

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Speaker 1: to be watching Frasier or or Friends, depends like I'll

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Speaker 1: switch if one doesn't make me fall e been one episode,

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Speaker 1: but I'm going between those two. It's the soothing voice

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Speaker 1: of David Hyde Pierce. I love Frasier so much, and

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Speaker 1: I've seen it in its entirety so many times that yes,

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Speaker 1: it's just like I know what's coming. It is soothing.

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Speaker 1: It's never big, big loud noises. There's no you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean how some shows are just fucking loud. Yes,

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Speaker 1: it's comfort, familiarity, and I know that that show is

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Speaker 1: not going to like get rowdy, like like euphoria. I've

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Speaker 1: been watching that show has been fucking me up. That's stressful. No,

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Speaker 1: I know it's going to go to sleep to you

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Speaker 1: for you, that's the sign of a sociopath. That's a

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Speaker 1: really that's a huge red flag. Cool. I've been meaning

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Speaker 1: to check out that show so frasier, I mean, and

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Speaker 1: now it's James Ceney. James, I don't do nicknames, but

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Speaker 1: a variation on the same question. It's three am, you're

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Speaker 1: at seven eleven or your local convenience store of choice.

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Speaker 1: What are you buying at three am? I guess I

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Speaker 1: would probably be let's see, it's probably not an energy drink,

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Speaker 1: and that's usually what I would do, but not at

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Speaker 1: three am. Don't sell yourself short. That's that's energy drink.

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Speaker 1: Sounds like well, I guess a bang energy drink, the

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Speaker 1: one that tastes like cotton candy, because they're not going

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Speaker 1: to sell booze at that hour. They're not gonna sell

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Speaker 1: me beer even if I want it. And I don't

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Speaker 1: smoke or chew anymore. Uh, I guess damn it at

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Speaker 1: three am. I'm I'm not happy yet at three am.

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Speaker 1: That that's not good. Craig. I've eaten at seven eleven

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Speaker 1: at three am, and you know it's the rolling thing

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Speaker 1: that looks like a hot dog, but somebody blended up

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Speaker 1: some sort of breading inside of it. I guess i'd

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Speaker 1: get one of those. Well you showed a disappointing amount

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Speaker 1: of discipline on that answer. Sorry, And look who it is.

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Speaker 1: It's Caroline Cotter. Carol One. What game or sport could

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Speaker 1: you kick my ass in? Okay, I have an answer

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Speaker 1: to this, but I just want to say, like James said,

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Speaker 1: the breading was inside the hot dog. It's blended. It's

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Speaker 1: like a burger dog or something. I don't actually want

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Speaker 1: to know more about that. What are those reverse dogs?

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Speaker 1: Meat on the outside, bread on the I think that's

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Speaker 1: what it is. Yeah, I'm a fucking vomit. But Craig,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, um, like what sports you're good at?

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Speaker 1: So I can't stay with full confidence anything I know

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Speaker 1: I would you know? You know? Yeah, you're right, I

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Speaker 1: do know. I think, Um, I think that I haven't

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Speaker 1: played it for like fifteen years, but I think if

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Speaker 1: we did like a one on one field hockey, that

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Speaker 1: I would you And I was really and I was

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Speaker 1: really aggressive with like I would get in trouble for

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Speaker 1: like hitting people like not the ball, so watch out. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you're totally right. And I don't even know one on

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Speaker 1: one field hockey would look me neither we'd figure it

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Speaker 1: out because we're on offense and had to defend the gold.

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Speaker 1: That's right. That's weird and last and possibly least. I mean,

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Speaker 1: somebody has to be it's just math. It's Joey Greer. Joey,

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Speaker 1: what book have you read more than any other? And

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Speaker 1: it's okay if it's the Bible? Oh wow, what book

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Speaker 1: if I read more than any other book? Uh? I

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Speaker 1: guess it would you know what? You know what it

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Speaker 1: would be? No, that's why that's my neighbor's diary. And

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Speaker 1: I'm able to get inside the house pretty quickly now

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Speaker 1: because I'm like, you know, figured out the window sill,

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Speaker 1: figured out the locks, and I've greased it perfectly for

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Speaker 1: my body because you're gonna think, oh, you don't want

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Speaker 1: too much grease. You want to like you know, but

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Speaker 1: you want enough grease for your for your mass. And

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Speaker 1: I found out that I need about like two to

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Speaker 1: sixteen courts of just like you know, hot hot, Uh,

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Speaker 1: what's it called ferret butter? So it's very specific kind

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Speaker 1: of butter. And then you use that and then you

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Speaker 1: just slide right in there. And they've moved it around

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Speaker 1: because I think they got wise that I was picking

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Speaker 1: it up, but he's he's he's pretty jill about it.

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Speaker 1: So I'll leave it on the desk or something like that.

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Speaker 1: You gotta go in there early morning. But I've read

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Speaker 1: that probably cover to cover, cover to cover moment six

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Speaker 1: to seven hundred times, but it wasn't filled at the beginning, right,

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Speaker 1: do you? Never mind? Never mind? It's been hard to

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Speaker 1: get Ferret better lately because of the suppledge issues. I know,

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Speaker 1: I know, what's your hook up, honestly, Amazon problem. I

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Speaker 1: know it's crazy. Don't cancel me evil, They're evil, But

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Speaker 1: you can get same day Ferret Butter Joey. Thank you

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Speaker 1: for that honest answer to an honest question. All of

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Speaker 1: our scene suggestions are gathered from listeners, emails, or from

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Speaker 1: our Patreon v I p s to become a Patreon

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Speaker 1: supporter of the show and enjoy exclusive content like standalone

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Speaker 1: bonus scenes, video of our recording sessions, and at the

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Speaker 1: highest level of support Alcamaniac, you'll have the chance to

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Speaker 1: join one of our recording sessions. Just head our over

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Speaker 1: to patreon dot com slash Alchemy this. If you'd like

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Speaker 1: to submit a scene suggestion via email, please write to

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Speaker 1: the guests in our new email address. I'll give you

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Speaker 1: this email at gmail dot com. That's com Scene number

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Speaker 1: one comes from Alchemy v I p Oystein, Oyster or

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Speaker 1: possibly Oystein, who writes happy February, Happy February Oystein. Two

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Speaker 1: alternative scene suggestions for your consideration, waking up at a

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Speaker 1: stranger's bed, missing your pet cow, excessive hair growth. That

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Speaker 1: sounds like three, but I think waking up at a

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Speaker 1: strangers bed missing your pet cow is one, and I

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Speaker 1: think excessive hair growth is the other, or possibly missing

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Speaker 1: your pet cow excessive hair growth is the second. But Oystein,

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Speaker 1: I bet we can in some way honor all three

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Speaker 1: of those. Oh my god, you don't have to go.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, I thought you were asleep. I'm so sorry. Um,

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Speaker 1: oh my god. No, no, no, no, no, no. We're

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Speaker 1: just going to say we had a time, we had sex, right, like,

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Speaker 1: did we have full sex? Yes? But now I feel

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Speaker 1: weird remember it and I feel weird. No, I did

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Speaker 1: remember it. I was just hoping it was a dream.

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Speaker 1: I hope I was hoping it was a nightmare. I

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Speaker 1: remember every second of it. I was dead ass sober

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Speaker 1: for all of that, and it's one of the biggest

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Speaker 1: regrets in my life. I wish I was blacked out.

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Speaker 1: But if you want to hang, no, I can't. I'm

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Speaker 1: a farmer. I have to get back to my animals. Fuck,

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Speaker 1: I'm so fucked. I'm like, it's a four am. I

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Speaker 1: have to like start the feeding. Um fuck, and you're

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Speaker 1: not even hot, Like, I'm sorry, but you are fucking ugly.

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Speaker 1: Do people tell you? I'm so sorry. I'm just so shocked.

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Speaker 1: I can't what was Hugh? I don't know what to

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Speaker 1: tell you. There's just an excessive hair growth in your

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Speaker 1: pelvic area, right, but can you get rid of it?

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Speaker 1: You know, we're really looking to just mom dead? Jeez?

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Speaker 1: Can we get rid of it? Um? Sure, you're an adult.

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Speaker 1: What are they? What are they here? Well, last nights

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Speaker 1: something really embarrassing happened and I told my parents about it.

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Speaker 1: He's been dealing with this issue ever since he was

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Speaker 1: thirteen years old. Not the sex. I don't know if

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Speaker 1: that's a necessary for you. There's so much hair down

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Speaker 1: there that even a minor erection gets tangled up, and

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Speaker 1: that it's painful for him, it's painful for the partner,

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Speaker 1: and it's honestly unseemly and I fear that my son

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Speaker 1: will never find a match for the rest of his

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Speaker 1: life because people can't get over that. And let me

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Speaker 1: just make it really easy for you. Understand, I had

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Speaker 1: the same problem at his age. I would have never

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Speaker 1: been able to get together with me, and I forced

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Speaker 1: him to laser that off as well. Now, at that time,

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Speaker 1: they were using a different kind of laser. So what

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Speaker 1: I want to know is are your particular lasers going

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Speaker 1: to work on his particular problem because his hair is

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Speaker 1: a little courser than my husband. Well, we've we've moved

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Speaker 1: away from Cold War later technology, so I imagine the

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Speaker 1: scar tissue that's built up around the pelvicaria. Well, your

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Speaker 1: parents were right to to hire a sex therapist for

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Speaker 1: your wife. Heard it all, so you know, don't don't worry.

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Speaker 1: You know that nothing's going to seem weird or so

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Speaker 1: tell me about your directions. Are you're having major directions

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Speaker 1: minor directions? I mean for me they're major, but for

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Speaker 1: other people possibly mine and for the more I feel like, well,

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Speaker 1: I've only had sex one time and it was two

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Speaker 1: nights ago. Was it full sex? It was full intext

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Speaker 1: and yes, she was stone cold sober. If you're wondering.

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Speaker 1: But the next morning she said, all the things I

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Speaker 1: have always feared out here from a woman. I'm very ugly,

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Speaker 1: wildly and aggressively unattractive. Um stuff like that. No, what's

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Speaker 1: this woman in the city or is the country? Funny?

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Speaker 1: You should ask? We were in my place at the city.

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Speaker 1: But she's a country girl. Okay, okay, so she she

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Speaker 1: like what's on the farm, went into the city to

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Speaker 1: the club to hook up and four am and milk

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Speaker 1: cows that old story. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, But I've

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Speaker 1: done something a little romantic. I'm not letting this one

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Speaker 1: get away. I got one. I'm not letting her go.

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Speaker 1: I uh what I still wanted for cows? How did

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Speaker 1: you manage that? Sharmon, Sharmon, I'm missing one of the heifers.

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Speaker 1: Are you sure? Can you count again? I mean, I

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Speaker 1: know there's only two cows. I'm telling you, charm there's one.

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Speaker 1: There's just one. What the fuck? So I guess that's

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Speaker 1: my day. I'll just clock. No no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: no no no. You can't just leave when there's a

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Speaker 1: missing cow. Your job is a cow handler. So you understand,

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Speaker 1: like it's kind of a big deal. Oft of the

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Speaker 1: cows are missing. Oh yeah, I mean that? Yeah? Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: did anything strange happen? Um when I was gone? You

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Speaker 1: know how I was gone a couple of nights ago

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Speaker 1: for the night. Yeah. Well let's see right before you

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Speaker 1: came home? Uh? Oh stone sober and yeah. I don't

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Speaker 1: know if you've ever heard of a sasquatch before, like

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Speaker 1: big foot? Yeah? Yes, uh I saw what I can

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Speaker 1: only assume is a bigot run through the open. Let

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Speaker 1: me just stop you right here. So um, you've said

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Speaker 1: you've seen sasquatch before, and I've shown you just a

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Speaker 1: picture of a man and you said, yeah, that's sasquatch.

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Speaker 1: Just to clarify, was this a man? Or was this

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Speaker 1: like an actual sasquatch like t Harry thing or like

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Speaker 1: a regular man like kind of I say, maybe like

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Speaker 1: three four inches Harry, But yeah, I'm a sasquatched. Mom, Dad,

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Speaker 1: do we set the table? I have a guess coming tonight.

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Speaker 1: You can certainly set the table, son, Yes, I would

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Speaker 1: love for you to set the table. Thank you, Thank you, love,

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Speaker 1: thank you? What are we having tonight? Ma? I'm sorry?

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Speaker 1: Is it always my dad? Sorry? Do I not get

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Speaker 1: one day? All? But you were I thought you were

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Speaker 1: having somebody over for dinner. I yeah, it was really excited. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we're all we were all we had, we were excited.

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Speaker 1: What's for dinner? It's up to me, bing bong. Oh

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Speaker 1: it's six at six pm. Who would be here at

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Speaker 1: this time of night? Go see dad? Hello? Hi, um,

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Speaker 1: your son has my fucking cow. Oh my god, you're beautiful.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Thank you so much. Thanks. Don't

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Speaker 1: tell me that enough. Thank you so much. Hi mom, Dad,

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Speaker 1: this is Charmane Charte. Knew you'd come you not like

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Speaker 1: I mean, I knew you. I knew you'd come to

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Speaker 1: my home. Mom. Thank you. Um, so I was talking

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Speaker 1: about stunning. Hi. I can't. I'm not going to stay

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Speaker 1: for long. I'm so sorry. I just wait. You're gonna

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Speaker 1: have to stay a little longer because son, I haven't

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Speaker 1: finished dinner yet. Wink wink. But you guys just hang

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Speaker 1: out here and I'll bring it out to the living

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Speaker 1: room in in five minutes. I'm so sorry. Why does

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Speaker 1: it look like your dad has like a like tumors

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Speaker 1: or like a growth on his bottom half? It was

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Speaker 1: like a Russian stacking dog. You don't have to tell me.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I was asking just him, and now that

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Speaker 1: he's like asking your mom about it's you know, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a little bit uncomfortable, but it's not so uncomfortable

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Speaker 1: when it hits the right spot, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: So let's speak. I'm gonna rush the rest of real quick.

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Speaker 1: I'll let you too get acquainted, you know, because you

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Speaker 1: both spent some time in the same territory. Mark, what

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Speaker 1: are you doing? You're covering up You're covering up a

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Speaker 1: cow in the garage and you needn't help. But he

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Speaker 1: or what's going on? Um? What what did you say?

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Speaker 1: Covering up a cow? I said, cutting up? Looks like

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Speaker 1: you're carving up a cow and sing up a cow? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Oh you notice this? Oh yeah, you know. But I think, uh,

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Speaker 1: I think I gotta kill it. It's the problem. I

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Speaker 1: don't think it's you never killed a cow before. No, No,

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Speaker 1: I don't even know where this thing came from. Let

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Speaker 1: me help you do it. I grew up on a farm.

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Speaker 1: What you wanna do as you want to just ste

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Speaker 1: keeping Oh the skull is there and stop. So I

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Speaker 1: in a moment of passion, I prayed to God and said,

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Speaker 1: let me go to the garage and find something to

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Speaker 1: feed my My boy has brought the girl for the

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Speaker 1: first time. Thank you, thank you. So we need to

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Speaker 1: kill this cow quick and I need to get whatever

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Speaker 1: part of this thing is is for steaks of dr

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Speaker 1: um lipshits. You're the best sex therapist, Thank you very much.

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Speaker 1: Can I just jump right in? This is okay? Um,

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Speaker 1: So I've been seeing my boyfriend for about four months,

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Speaker 1: and yes we do have sex, and yes it's full

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Speaker 1: in full sex. Okay, yes, and it's and it's good

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Speaker 1: and it's fun. But ever since, you know, he's been

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Speaker 1: having some problems at work. Um, one of the cows

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Speaker 1: is gone. I don't know, he has less work to

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Speaker 1: do at work, and he's like at home earlier and

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Speaker 1: he's hungry for my body, and um, it's it's not

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Speaker 1: as fun for me. Um, it's like still a good time,

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Speaker 1: but I feel like the work is now coming home

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Speaker 1: like sometimes you know, yeah, but what does he do?

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Speaker 1: It's sometimes it's fun and it's passionate. What does he? Um,

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Speaker 1: he's a he works at a farm, at a dairy farm. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I figured I think I just heard one of the

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Speaker 1: cows is missing. Oh yeah, he works at a dairy farm. Um,

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Speaker 1: it's a lot of mucking of the stalls, but it's

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Speaker 1: also there. They're at old school, so they do hand

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Speaker 1: um utter pulling, they do hand milking, and he's channeling

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Speaker 1: some of that into exactly. Sometimes I feel like he

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Speaker 1: feels like he's it feels like work to him, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, there's nothing going to come out right now,

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Speaker 1: you know, we feel permission. I'd love to come and

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Speaker 1: take the two of you have like sets or just

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Speaker 1: having dinner. Let's start with dinner and see where it goes. Now,

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Speaker 1: if you look at the evidence here, it's very clear

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Speaker 1: that this is a big foot. All right. Now, I

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Speaker 1: understand that some of the pictures BORI alright, but if

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Speaker 1: we just take into consideration, this is I am a

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Speaker 1: sex therapist. From the picture you're showing me, that is

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Speaker 1: a that is a male penis. Yeah, it is all right,

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Speaker 1: But if we look at it, if we zoom in,

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Speaker 1: all right, tell me, don't tell me that's not the

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Speaker 1: gate of a full blown big foot. Look at the steps.

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Speaker 1: Look at the steps, something only eight feet supposed to

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Speaker 1: just be having dinner, and you're just like a silent observer. Sorry, sorry,

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Speaker 1: but this sasquatch thing. Just really threw me off. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean, I mean he's the only one talking. Okay,

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Speaker 1: thanks Dad, it looks great. Um, maybe we should say

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Speaker 1: a quick around of grace. Yeah, I'll say I'll say grace.

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Speaker 1: I'll let me just say that. Um. I don't want

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Speaker 1: to have dinner with any of you here. I came

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Speaker 1: here to fine my cow. Hold on a second, you

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Speaker 1: don't want to have Nancy and I can leave you

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Speaker 1: two alone here? No, yea the problem. I can also

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Speaker 1: leave to Mark. I'm happy to get out of your know.

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Speaker 1: You help me with the cow. You help me with

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Speaker 1: the cow. You're eating this with them? I appreciate that.

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Speaker 1: Did you want them to shower? I know that they're

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Speaker 1: covered with blood? Did you need that to be? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry when you say you help me with the cow? Um?

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Speaker 1: What do ephemism? This is so good? You know the

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Speaker 1: cow has two stomachs, so I don't mind eating this one.

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Speaker 1: Is this my fucking cow? Is this my fucking cow? What? Yes? Mom, neighbor,

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Speaker 1: it is Hugh. I've known you since you were thirteen?

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Speaker 1: What do you mean, neighbor? Wait? So how does that so?

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Speaker 1: What do you what's our relationship? I'm saying you don't

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Speaker 1: know my name. You know what mark, I'm gonna take

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Speaker 1: the I'm gonna take the cow. Somebody don't really star

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Speaker 1: are not nothing? So how did it go? Well? Um? Um,

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Speaker 1: I tried your honesty is the best policy tactic, and

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Speaker 1: I will say, though the outcome wasn't what I wanted

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Speaker 1: and hope for, I do feel better having been honest. Um.

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Speaker 1: So as she left, she had some honest things to

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Speaker 1: say about me. And she pointed to my pelvic area

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Speaker 1: and said that will never be in me or any

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Speaker 1: living thing ever again. And she did like a curse,

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Speaker 1: like some kind of like like ancient curse and penis curse,

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Speaker 1: and so you're familiar with that. Yeah, yeah, I've believe me.

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Speaker 1: I've heard everything. And it turns out she wasn't happy

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Speaker 1: with the cows stealing. Okay, what kind of curse was

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Speaker 1: placed on your penis? She looked at it and said,

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Speaker 1: weenie weenie, weenie weenie, never never more. I guess I

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Speaker 1: wasn't thinking of the incantation so much as the effect

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Speaker 1: of the curse. Oh, like, what has happened since? Yeah? Oh, um,

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Speaker 1: I think you might have had the opposite effect that

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Speaker 1: she was looking for. Oh, so major directions than you

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Speaker 1: and that scene one masturbatory to go out on your

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Speaker 1: own line. But hey, when this scene's over, when it's over,

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Speaker 1: it's over. We got this scene Number two comes from

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Speaker 1: an alchemy V I Behaven, Hello doctor host, last name,

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Speaker 1: I Heart Media presents a new spinoff of the hell

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Speaker 1: you say called whoops, wrong kind of Indian. If you

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Speaker 1: don't want to touch that flaming garbage with a tin

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Speaker 1: foot twig, then let's go with University moonshine e tea.

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Speaker 1: That's an alternative ps. I'm Indigenous Native Aboriginal Indian pick

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Speaker 1: one and I approved of the first scene suggestion. Well Haven,

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Speaker 1: none of us are that, uh and so we're not

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Speaker 1: going to touch that, but we will gladly do University

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Speaker 1: Moonshining team. Come on, get up, we gotta go all right,

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Speaker 1: be able to fly or people got to know that

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Speaker 1: the moons and competitions happening this right, Come on, get up,

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Speaker 1: leave us, all right, leave us. You're taking a Shakespeare classes,

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Speaker 1: really fucking the way you're talking to everybody, leave us.

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Speaker 1: The house going on with Earls, You're right leaves, what

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Speaker 1: the hell is going on? And the wind off chapter

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Speaker 1: Earl chapter The Wind off Chapter Earl the Wind Chapter

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Speaker 1: Chapter Earl the Wind Chopped Earl Chapter Earl the Wind.

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Speaker 1: That pretty good, sirs? Holy shit? Fuck? Mihaps wonder if

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Speaker 1: thou was no the owner of Yonder still the pissing bucket? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: the pissing bucket belongs to the Yeah, what's going on? Uh?

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Speaker 1: God's blood? Good, sir, but I mayhap imbibed of the buckets.

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Speaker 1: You're trying with a piss book. We have moonshine. You

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Speaker 1: didn't drinking the piss book? It prithee, sir, I know

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Speaker 1: not moonshine. Holy shit, you know. Okay, we gotta get

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Speaker 1: you something there quick, all right, because that's Earl's urine,

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Speaker 1: all right. That gut is not drink water. We gotta

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Speaker 1: get you something to drink quick now. Look, Tina, we're

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Speaker 1: dropping you off here at school. We're nervous, but we're

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Speaker 1: proud of you. We know you're gonna make good choices. Um.

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Speaker 1: I do want to say, I hope you will continue

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Speaker 1: to pursue your athletics. You're good at field hockey, you're

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00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:01,280
Speaker 1: good at ice skating, good at a lot of things.

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Speaker 1: So you know it's not all about school. Study, study, study,

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00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:08,160
Speaker 1: you can also find some people that you share common

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Speaker 1: interest with and build friendships and camaraderie that way. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: good Now, I know you don't want to talk to

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Speaker 1: me anymore because I suck, because I suck, because I

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Speaker 1: was it. Would you say that I suck a fat one? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I know, I said you suck a fat stinking penis earlier,

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Speaker 1: but you won't say the word penis. Do you think

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00:24:29,560 --> 00:24:34,440
Speaker 1: it's gross? So, so why are you here today? Well,

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00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:36,600
Speaker 1: we've known each other for a long time now, right, dog,

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Speaker 1: it's ever since you are a young man. Yeah, and

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Speaker 1: now and now you are a father and I'm a father,

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Speaker 1: and I'm a father. The penis, the penis does suck.

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Speaker 1: The penis works. You said it, You said it. H Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you'd say it's around your daughter. No, No, it's hard

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Speaker 1: for me to say that word around my daughter. Also,

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Speaker 1: she blames me for her mother missing. Yeah, well it

398
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:07,040
Speaker 1: is from what you told me. It is totally your fault. Um. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so this is the like club day when I joined clubs.

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm interested in what you guys last week rush week.

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Speaker 1: I'm talking about like club activity day. You're from the

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Speaker 1: Moonshine team. Right, listen, ex Tina or whatever your name is. Okay, listen.

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00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:26,840
Speaker 1: Uh we do, uh we do. Yeah, we've we've been

404
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Speaker 1: winning the Moon Cup for the last six years in

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Speaker 1: a row and we don't plan on losing it anytime soon.

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Speaker 1: I'm just relieved to speak to you. You're speaking like

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Speaker 1: a normal person. Everybody else from the Moonshine team I've

408
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Speaker 1: come across speaks like Shakespeare kind of, so I didn't

409
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Speaker 1: know if that was a prerequisite or no. They did

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Speaker 1: Shakespeare on the court. They converted the basketball court into like,

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Speaker 1: you know, some kind of like garden and they started

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Speaker 1: doing Shakespeare there. But yeah, everyone, they're just got hammered

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Speaker 1: on Moonshine and just start taking classes and some ship.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to get any one out of it. But

415
00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:01,120
Speaker 1: uh yeah, yeah, if I could say, they just don't

416
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:06,719
Speaker 1: don't don't do because it's you know, I'm an athlete.

417
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:09,359
Speaker 1: I play field hockey and I figure skates, so don't worry,

418
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be doing I wouldn't be doing Shakespeare. Perfect.

419
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:15,560
Speaker 1: No one drinks more than theater, nurse and athletes. This

420
00:26:15,640 --> 00:26:18,240
Speaker 1: is just fantastic. If we can combine the two, we're

421
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:22,400
Speaker 1: gonna fucking run this campus. What sports you in right now? Um?

422
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:25,679
Speaker 1: Field hockey and figure skating? Oh my god, this is finer.

423
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:31,399
Speaker 1: I was like skating, but I haven't since my alright,

424
00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,320
Speaker 1: so if you could just do me a favorite, just

425
00:26:33,359 --> 00:26:37,119
Speaker 1: tick some of these bottles here, all right, and just

426
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:39,920
Speaker 1: pass them around. I'm sorry, I just drank out of

427
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,600
Speaker 1: the one on the ground. Was that one? Note? That's

428
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:50,280
Speaker 1: a earl's piss? Welcome, good sirs to Shakespeare. On the

429
00:26:50,359 --> 00:27:00,160
Speaker 1: court today's game, Capuletts versus Montagues starting at point guard

430
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:13,679
Speaker 1: for the Montagues, Ben Folio at shooting guards. Romeo the

431
00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:18,640
Speaker 1: man in the middle. I gotta ask, why are they

432
00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:22,080
Speaker 1: all dressed like that? What's the frilly thing around their necks?

433
00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:24,520
Speaker 1: It's just a thrill thing man, just watching. No, no,

434
00:27:24,640 --> 00:27:28,399
Speaker 1: this is interesting. This is interesting. I hear for the

435
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:32,800
Speaker 1: halftime show they actually do the play. Oh my god,

436
00:27:33,080 --> 00:27:36,320
Speaker 1: the whole play. Yeah, it's really long. I'm not going

437
00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:38,680
Speaker 1: to say. Yeah, this is kind of the intros, kind

438
00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 1: of the game of it all in the halftime show

439
00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:46,560
Speaker 1: is the play, and then and then the second half

440
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:50,960
Speaker 1: is actually the basketball game. Friar Lawrence and your referee. Wow,

441
00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:53,080
Speaker 1: that's college is so different from what I thought it

442
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:58,480
Speaker 1: would be, like, Oh you're fresh. Yeah, no, ship, you

443
00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 1: look old. I do. People always tell me that. People

444
00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:04,960
Speaker 1: tell I use a lot of Like from the time

445
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:08,439
Speaker 1: I was like two to like sixteen, I would spend

446
00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:10,879
Speaker 1: like twenty three days out in the sun, like covered

447
00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:16,400
Speaker 1: in oil. Wow, exactly. I love a person with numbers.

448
00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:18,800
Speaker 1: I was trying to bake myself. I thought it could

449
00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:24,640
Speaker 1: be done, but I'm still here. What's your numerology sign? Um?

450
00:28:24,640 --> 00:28:27,119
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for asking me. I am totally

451
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:33,280
Speaker 1: a seven rising virgo what I love that, I'm a

452
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:38,200
Speaker 1: three dropping bond to go. Oh my god, that's so rare.

453
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 1: You just stabbed him out on the court just watching

454
00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:46,520
Speaker 1: the game. Just want to scratch foul. I bite my

455
00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:49,040
Speaker 1: thumb at you. Ask for me tomorrow and I shall

456
00:28:49,080 --> 00:28:54,440
Speaker 1: be a grave man. Now listen, I'm the dean of competitions.

457
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:58,320
Speaker 1: As you know. Thank you everybody for being here, for

458
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 1: you made us come here. Well, it's important because the

459
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:05,840
Speaker 1: rules have changed. This won't take long. Um, is it

460
00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:08,720
Speaker 1: gonna take long? No? So there's there's new rules for

461
00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:12,240
Speaker 1: the competition this year. Uh. Two new rules. One everything

462
00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:14,600
Speaker 1: has to be organic and two you can only use

463
00:29:14,680 --> 00:29:20,840
Speaker 1: three ingredients? Yeah, okay, bye, where are those iron chef rules?

464
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 1: So any questions? Everyone's gone, well, oh yeah, you hung back?

465
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:29,200
Speaker 1: What's up? Hey? How can I be? I'm the dean

466
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:33,800
Speaker 1: of competitions. Hey. Uh, I was just wondering is the

467
00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:39,280
Speaker 1: three ingredients? Now? I'm a little confused because when we're

468
00:29:39,320 --> 00:29:45,000
Speaker 1: making alcohol, uh, because that's what moonshine is and it's legal. Right,

469
00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:50,120
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna what's your what's your question? Uh? So

470
00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:53,760
Speaker 1: alcohol is one of the ingredients, right, or can we

471
00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:58,200
Speaker 1: do three ingredients after alcohol? Good question? Um, alcohol is

472
00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:00,080
Speaker 1: one of the ingredients and then you get too, can

473
00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:04,440
Speaker 1: get two bonus ingredients? Okay, okay, though you know moonshining

474
00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:10,080
Speaker 1: is illegal. I didn't know that. Honestly, I'm oh my god, Dale,

475
00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:12,640
Speaker 1: you've been cheating with the moonshining team this whole time.

476
00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:15,680
Speaker 1: You're just adding alcohol to the moonshine the points we're

477
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 1: supposed to make alcohol out of, like a fermentation process.

478
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:22,760
Speaker 1: We're gonna else if you you'll find out, we're gonna

479
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:29,840
Speaker 1: fucked Dale, piece of ship. Second, say, if that's why

480
00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 1: mine is so much stronger, I put just a little

481
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:34,800
Speaker 1: bit of alcohol, Yeah, a little bit me thinks this

482
00:30:34,840 --> 00:30:39,280
Speaker 1: moonshine tis but grain and gatorade. Yeah, it is green.

483
00:30:39,520 --> 00:30:42,800
Speaker 1: It is green and gatorade. It's sucking pop off and

484
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:47,160
Speaker 1: s gatorade. Dale. That's it. This is not we have

485
00:30:47,320 --> 00:30:49,920
Speaker 1: room for one more ingredients. That's just the good news.

486
00:30:50,040 --> 00:30:52,120
Speaker 1: That's not the point. If the moonshine, if the College

487
00:30:52,160 --> 00:30:54,880
Speaker 1: Moonshine Board finds out about this, we're gonna be disqualified

488
00:30:54,880 --> 00:31:00,760
Speaker 1: from all future competitions, including nationals. Oh well, I didn't

489
00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:07,360
Speaker 1: expect that. Me half an idea? Okay, me hath an idea?

490
00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:10,440
Speaker 1: Half it? What is up with this? Me? Ship? Just

491
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:17,240
Speaker 1: say I can no one say I I I I

492
00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:23,960
Speaker 1: think what the problem is is I means yes? Then okay, okay,

493
00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:30,080
Speaker 1: what's the idea? Idea? Have idea? Okay? If three ingredients

494
00:31:30,280 --> 00:31:39,160
Speaker 1: be what must then then just write it down and

495
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:46,240
Speaker 1: Earl's piss. Oh, girls piss as an ingredient. Interesting. Wait

496
00:31:46,280 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 1: a second, there's so much fucking alcohol and Earl's piss

497
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:52,120
Speaker 1: it might be able to dilute it in the same

498
00:31:52,120 --> 00:31:54,560
Speaker 1: way that Dale's doing. Wait, if we make girls piss

499
00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:57,120
Speaker 1: in the concoction that Dale has already made, we're adding

500
00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:59,720
Speaker 1: that third ingredients The looting the pop off and actually

501
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:01,959
Speaker 1: making stronger than ever. We'll be able to kill more

502
00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:05,080
Speaker 1: people than than than than than a nuclear weapon with this, Dean,

503
00:32:06,320 --> 00:32:10,560
Speaker 1: can you step into my office? Please? You want the

504
00:32:10,560 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 1: dean of competitions? Absolutely dem He shoots, he scores. Listen, Dina, unfortunately,

505
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:22,440
Speaker 1: tell me you have a crush on me and I

506
00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:26,520
Speaker 1: get it. Listen, I'm gonna stop you right there. That's

507
00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:32,040
Speaker 1: extremely inappropriate. This is still the workplace and I'm your superior. Um.

508
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:33,480
Speaker 1: If I did have a crush on you, I'd have

509
00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:36,800
Speaker 1: to report that crush to HR and have it in

510
00:32:36,880 --> 00:32:40,040
Speaker 1: written form that I was looking to enter a relationship

511
00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:43,960
Speaker 1: with you. Um. They would then inform you about that

512
00:32:44,520 --> 00:32:47,520
Speaker 1: formal invitation. But they have not done that because I

513
00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:49,800
Speaker 1: have not filed that. But that's how that goes. If

514
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:54,440
Speaker 1: you want to have a relationship here with anybody. Unfortunately,

515
00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:58,680
Speaker 1: that won't be an issue for you. UM. The budget cuts,

516
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,840
Speaker 1: I can't believe that we have evn't cut you sooner,

517
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:07,360
Speaker 1: but unfortunately we don't have room. We considered cutting the arts.

518
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:10,480
Speaker 1: Have we considered getting rid of the plays around here?

519
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:14,880
Speaker 1: The figure skating like what is that? Well? Figure skating

520
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 1: is a sport it's an Olympic sport. Uh. If we

521
00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:22,640
Speaker 1: get rid of the arts, there goes half of your competitions.

522
00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:28,800
Speaker 1: As you know, this is a liberal arts sports college,

523
00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:33,480
Speaker 1: so they'll go ahead in hand. This one has kind

524
00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:39,720
Speaker 1: of a blue palette. Interesting, I'm getting getting hints of alcohol.

525
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:46,360
Speaker 1: That's good. That's good, and uh, I think possibly maybe

526
00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:52,800
Speaker 1: the blues blue eye skater. Yeah, yeah, and there's a

527
00:33:52,840 --> 00:33:59,280
Speaker 1: third there's a third ingredient. Yeah, I can't quite place.

528
00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:03,800
Speaker 1: You said barley and blue ice skatorade already, so you

529
00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:06,520
Speaker 1: said one more. I'll give you a hint to look

530
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:08,600
Speaker 1: at the look at earl this man here, Look at

531
00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:12,239
Speaker 1: this crotch. Why would I look at his crotch? Just

532
00:34:12,360 --> 00:34:16,439
Speaker 1: really laser in on it. Okay, give a hint. Well,

533
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:19,480
Speaker 1: there's a there's a little wet spot on his crotch. Ye,

534
00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:25,640
Speaker 1: ye's warm, warm warm? Okay, and warm is warm a

535
00:34:25,680 --> 00:34:29,480
Speaker 1: clue as well, because this is war this is warmer

536
00:34:29,480 --> 00:34:34,760
Speaker 1: than moonshine, yes, already, stop stop. The competition has been canceled.

537
00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:38,680
Speaker 1: Funding for this competition has been canceled, So if a

538
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:41,200
Speaker 1: winner hasn't been already announced, there is no winner for

539
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:45,160
Speaker 1: this year, Thank you very much, you're canceling it now.

540
00:34:46,200 --> 00:34:50,399
Speaker 1: I just strike piss. I just you got it. That's

541
00:34:50,400 --> 00:34:57,239
Speaker 1: the third ingredient. That's it. What we have one? Yes, yes, Well.

542
00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:59,000
Speaker 1: The good news is if one of you wants to

543
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:03,400
Speaker 1: turn this moment into us aliloquy, that's an option. Fuck you, Dean.

544
00:35:03,719 --> 00:35:06,520
Speaker 1: There's that guy. Hey, hey, you're supposed to get off campus, buddy,

545
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:10,040
Speaker 1: you were fined you. This is on my way to

546
00:35:10,080 --> 00:35:12,600
Speaker 1: my car. Oh really, I gotta I drive. I drive

547
00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:17,120
Speaker 1: a Honda NSX. You know what that is? No? Right? Right?

548
00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:19,160
Speaker 1: Oh and by the way, if you like me or

549
00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:22,000
Speaker 1: don't like me, turn it into HR and I'll receive

550
00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:26,200
Speaker 1: that formally. So see you later. I gotta interview at

551
00:35:26,200 --> 00:35:28,520
Speaker 1: a private school for a soccer coach. Oh oh no,

552
00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:30,359
Speaker 1: you said your car was this way. Come on, don't

553
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:36,719
Speaker 1: walk the other way. He fade. I love the idea

554
00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:45,560
Speaker 1: of walking together. Scene three comes from listener L Kim

555
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:48,640
Speaker 1: Cruise right, Hey, Kevin and Gang. A month or so ago,

556
00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:51,160
Speaker 1: I decided to waste some time, so I watched some

557
00:35:51,239 --> 00:35:56,040
Speaker 1: old timey television. I was watching Community old timey television

558
00:35:56,280 --> 00:35:58,600
Speaker 1: which one day a cop character in the show appears

559
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:00,919
Speaker 1: and he talks I know who that is? I said

560
00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:04,200
Speaker 1: to myself. I couldn't believe it. It was Craig. Craig,

561
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:06,719
Speaker 1: I hope you were there when Kevin or whoever is

562
00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:11,440
Speaker 1: replacing him Craig is reading this. I have so many

563
00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:13,920
Speaker 1: questions for you. Was filming the show as fun as

564
00:36:13,960 --> 00:36:16,520
Speaker 1: it looks? Was it as exhausting as everyone says? Are

565
00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:18,719
Speaker 1: you a fan of the show? Do you like it?

566
00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:21,600
Speaker 1: Is that separate from being a fan? I could listen

567
00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:24,319
Speaker 1: to you, Craig, for hours while you spill us with

568
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:27,040
Speaker 1: some memories from the show, your acting career in general,

569
00:36:27,120 --> 00:36:29,800
Speaker 1: and more of your review corner. But the podcast is

570
00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:32,359
Speaker 1: not Craig's talk show L O L anyway. The cop

571
00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:35,480
Speaker 1: character fits Craig perfectly and exceedingly aware cop and a

572
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:38,399
Speaker 1: very kind and warm person. I expect a huge role

573
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:40,400
Speaker 1: for the cop, and for Garrett, and for Neil and

574
00:36:40,440 --> 00:36:43,200
Speaker 1: for Pop Pop. I think he means magnitude in the

575
00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:47,200
Speaker 1: movie when it comes out. Have you heard anything about it? Btw?

576
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:50,399
Speaker 1: But I digress. My suggestion is the following the cop

577
00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:53,120
Speaker 1: from Community finds himself trapped in the library study room

578
00:36:53,120 --> 00:36:54,759
Speaker 1: in the middle of a paintball battle with a group

579
00:36:54,760 --> 00:36:58,439
Speaker 1: of misfit students from the Community College Greendale. I love

580
00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:01,600
Speaker 1: you all, Elkin, Well, Elkin, I can address some of

581
00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:05,720
Speaker 1: those points there. Uh. First of all, I have talked extensively,

582
00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 1: do have stories about my time on community. And there's

583
00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:11,319
Speaker 1: a podcast called Six Seasons at a podcast I'm on

584
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:15,800
Speaker 1: episode thirty five, probably answering all those community related questions

585
00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:20,200
Speaker 1: that you would like to hear. Uh. And I'm worried

586
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:24,680
Speaker 1: about Dan Harmon because he's very litigious. Uh, if we

587
00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:27,919
Speaker 1: interfered with all the intellectual property from Community. I also

588
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:31,680
Speaker 1: can't guarantee that anybody in this cast knows exactly what

589
00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:34,960
Speaker 1: that scene suggestion is. But we can go with the

590
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:39,760
Speaker 1: suggestion paintball battle. All right, So this is your gear. Okay,

591
00:37:39,920 --> 00:37:42,200
Speaker 1: tend your gear. This is what you're gonna be offered

592
00:37:42,239 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 1: for the day and only for today. And you can

593
00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 1: paintballs break bones. Paintballs cannot break bones. I got frozen paintballs.

594
00:37:49,719 --> 00:37:53,439
Speaker 1: I brought my own. All right, Come on, you want

595
00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:59,440
Speaker 1: to go down that door, be sure, go down that door. Right. So, Uh,

596
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:02,120
Speaker 1: they can't bruises skin though, all right, and a close

597
00:38:02,239 --> 00:38:04,200
Speaker 1: enough range they can't actually break the skin. That's why

598
00:38:04,239 --> 00:38:08,560
Speaker 1: we're gonna always at You're gonna have the questions when

599
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:12,680
Speaker 1: I'm finished telling you the safety. All right, it's fifteen

600
00:38:12,719 --> 00:38:17,080
Speaker 1: ft are more? All right? That's exact close distance. No

601
00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:21,360
Speaker 1: questions until I'm done with the safety, all right, godless

602
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:24,319
Speaker 1: be worn at all times. If you take your phone

603
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:26,200
Speaker 1: out to take a picture, to make a call, you

604
00:38:26,239 --> 00:38:28,840
Speaker 1: know that that phone could be shot by a paintball,

605
00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:31,000
Speaker 1: fly out of your hand and be used as another

606
00:38:31,040 --> 00:38:33,799
Speaker 1: projectile that can impale someone on your own team or

607
00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:37,600
Speaker 1: someone watching from the sides. So no phones, all shoes

608
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:43,919
Speaker 1: wo be worn at all times. Buddy, buddy, see that door,

609
00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:47,400
Speaker 1: go through it? All right? Then I put the frozen

610
00:38:47,440 --> 00:38:51,520
Speaker 1: paintballs out. Josh, what's going on? I thought I just

611
00:38:51,560 --> 00:38:53,960
Speaker 1: dropped you off. Why are you buying the parking lot? Well,

612
00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:57,440
Speaker 1: apparently I'm not allowed to bring my own paintballs, and

613
00:38:57,480 --> 00:39:00,279
Speaker 1: because these guys want to make money. Yeah, you were

614
00:39:00,360 --> 00:39:03,759
Speaker 1: so excited, John, I know, I know, Sorry, slugger, but

615
00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:05,640
Speaker 1: your mom and I already have a day plan, so

616
00:39:05,719 --> 00:39:07,959
Speaker 1: you're gonna have to hang out here in the parking lot.

617
00:39:08,600 --> 00:39:11,960
Speaker 1: Josh can just come with us. I don't think a

618
00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:14,680
Speaker 1: carnival is any place for a kid. I love carnivals.

619
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:18,960
Speaker 1: Oh my god, please please, I don't know. Well, can

620
00:39:19,040 --> 00:39:23,160
Speaker 1: you just run behind the car? Look? If that'll make

621
00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:25,359
Speaker 1: you happy. This is a new relationship and I want

622
00:39:25,520 --> 00:39:29,279
Speaker 1: us to prosper. So yeah, I'm compromising. I can't keep

623
00:39:29,360 --> 00:39:31,440
Speaker 1: up behind the car. It's okay. I'm gonna tie this

624
00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:35,840
Speaker 1: rope around you. Okay, and then there you go. But

625
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:38,279
Speaker 1: that's around one of my ankles. That's gonna trip me,

626
00:39:39,520 --> 00:39:44,760
Speaker 1: Matt if you keep up. Remember hi, all license and registration? Please?

627
00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:52,759
Speaker 1: Did I do something wrong? Yeah? You just got like

628
00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:57,719
Speaker 1: a dead kid on your windshield? Why you sure? Dad?

629
00:39:57,960 --> 00:40:00,880
Speaker 1: Did you check it's pulse? And I I didn't check.

630
00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:04,920
Speaker 1: I didn't don't have a coroner's report. Then what can

631
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:08,520
Speaker 1: I say? I also need I still need your license

632
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:11,879
Speaker 1: and registration, but I will check the pulse. Thank you.

633
00:40:11,880 --> 00:40:15,680
Speaker 1: You're so lucky. I'm a lawyer. I was underneath those

634
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:18,600
Speaker 1: Wendy's bags. Now listen to me. She's not gonna say

635
00:40:18,600 --> 00:40:23,439
Speaker 1: anything until we are read. I need I only read

636
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:26,520
Speaker 1: the Miranda rights. If you're getting arrested, I need her

637
00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:32,919
Speaker 1: so you could read me right. No, then I can

638
00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:36,360
Speaker 1: be on my way. Was that I need your license

639
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:38,479
Speaker 1: and registration. I'm gonna check the pulse on this poor

640
00:40:38,520 --> 00:40:41,399
Speaker 1: little guy here. Excuse me, I was just driving by.

641
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:44,160
Speaker 1: I'm a freelance coroner. Or do you need a corner's report?

642
00:40:44,280 --> 00:40:46,239
Speaker 1: I think we might. Yeah. Oh, it sounds like he's

643
00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:50,200
Speaker 1: making a little bit. Get down, get down down. Oh man,

644
00:40:50,680 --> 00:40:55,240
Speaker 1: you're really good with that gun. Where's everybody stop hiding?

645
00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:58,160
Speaker 1: I need to get through the safety. I need to

646
00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:01,080
Speaker 1: get through the safety. Okay, no one can play until

647
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:04,120
Speaker 1: the safety has been said. Hey, now that we're down here,

648
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:12,720
Speaker 1: guy telling something? Yeah, um, never mind? What never mind?

649
00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:16,120
Speaker 1: If you don't tell me, I'm gonna pistol whip you

650
00:41:16,239 --> 00:41:19,319
Speaker 1: with my airs of all right. I just want to

651
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:21,160
Speaker 1: say I like you, but I'm also a fan of you.

652
00:41:21,960 --> 00:41:26,160
Speaker 1: Those are two different things a fan. Well wait, was

653
00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:33,000
Speaker 1: it my performance of Su Su at the at the

654
00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:36,520
Speaker 1: food court? Yeah? At the food court you stood up.

655
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:40,520
Speaker 1: You're like yeah, yeah, and then the Chick fil a

656
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:44,640
Speaker 1: um guy said sit down, and we're like, that's not

657
00:41:44,719 --> 00:41:50,439
Speaker 1: a Christian. Yeah. Hey, Marcus, Uh sorry, we just saw

658
00:41:50,480 --> 00:41:54,400
Speaker 1: the CCTV footage. Based on your report, looks like you

659
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:57,439
Speaker 1: did kind of lie. Uh. Looks like you invited around

660
00:41:57,480 --> 00:42:01,680
Speaker 1: the table to sing. So Marcus, I'm sorry, I we

661
00:42:01,760 --> 00:42:03,919
Speaker 1: gotta let you go. I don't know what else to say.

662
00:42:04,000 --> 00:42:06,000
Speaker 1: I would love to see that footage because the way

663
00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:09,920
Speaker 1: I remember, the way I remember it is this young

664
00:42:10,520 --> 00:42:14,160
Speaker 1: lady hopped up onto a table with her dirty little shoes,

665
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:17,799
Speaker 1: did a whole performance, get the funk down out of there.

666
00:42:17,920 --> 00:42:21,480
Speaker 1: So I don't know what I did wrong, because to me,

667
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:25,719
Speaker 1: that sounds right. Well Marcus, uh, yeah, at one point

668
00:42:25,760 --> 00:42:29,400
Speaker 1: you did say that, but it also seemed like you

669
00:42:29,520 --> 00:42:32,080
Speaker 1: got caught up in the musical. And yeah, it looks

670
00:42:32,120 --> 00:42:34,200
Speaker 1: like you and thirty other people in the food corps

671
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:38,279
Speaker 1: were dancing in Unison. Have no memory of that, so

672
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:41,440
Speaker 1: I Marcus, it's it's on the CCTV. I don't know.

673
00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:46,120
Speaker 1: And you wanted the spicy chicken. You wanted the spicy

674
00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:54,880
Speaker 1: chicken meal. Marcus. Pretty sure. The team we're going against

675
00:42:54,920 --> 00:42:57,879
Speaker 1: us like high schoolers. They don't seem trained at all.

676
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:01,960
Speaker 1: We're gonna kick their ass to kick the rest, Colonel.

677
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:05,200
Speaker 1: I just want you to know if if for some

678
00:43:05,239 --> 00:43:07,759
Speaker 1: reason it doesn't go well out there for us, which

679
00:43:07,800 --> 00:43:09,600
Speaker 1: I know it will, you know, I mean we always,

680
00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:12,960
Speaker 1: we always kick ass. I just want you to know

681
00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:16,760
Speaker 1: I love it, you know what, I love you too.

682
00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 1: And that's why, even back here state side, I still

683
00:43:20,640 --> 00:43:22,359
Speaker 1: like to go out and get some reps with you.

684
00:43:22,840 --> 00:43:25,200
Speaker 1: It's good to get reps. It's good to kill, even

685
00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:30,440
Speaker 1: in an abstract. Well yeah, in an abstract, in an abstract.

686
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:32,200
Speaker 1: But you know, I just I just wanted to say it.

687
00:43:32,239 --> 00:43:36,120
Speaker 1: I love it. I mean I love you too. Thank you. No,

688
00:43:36,160 --> 00:43:39,080
Speaker 1: I mean, Rebecca, I mean I love you like what

689
00:43:39,160 --> 00:43:43,080
Speaker 1: do you mean? What do you mean? First of all,

690
00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:48,480
Speaker 1: I love you like a brother. You're to door, go

691
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:55,160
Speaker 1: to the door. That's the door is. But it was God, no,

692
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:57,920
Speaker 1: you got this. I just gotta go to the doctor.

693
00:43:59,239 --> 00:44:01,920
Speaker 1: I've never done it about you. I have to go

694
00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:07,480
Speaker 1: to the door. I'm out, I'm out. Hey did you

695
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:11,120
Speaker 1: see me? Yeah, I was freaking rat. I just was like,

696
00:44:11,200 --> 00:44:12,880
Speaker 1: I'm gonna stand up and go crazy. And then I

697
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:15,759
Speaker 1: came back. I got to tell you, Kyle, I'm a

698
00:44:15,760 --> 00:44:19,600
Speaker 1: fan Lugo. The colonel got hit eight months ago. Get

699
00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:23,279
Speaker 1: your ship together, stop drinking, for God's sakes, and get

700
00:44:23,320 --> 00:44:28,720
Speaker 1: back on the horse. Okay, this is my own stuff

701
00:44:28,719 --> 00:44:31,560
Speaker 1: that I'm making home. Alright. It was like it is

702
00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:36,680
Speaker 1: mostly pissed, but except for a while, and it firm mints. No,

703
00:44:36,840 --> 00:44:41,359
Speaker 1: it becomes ammonia. All right, now what I'm drinking, That's

704
00:44:41,360 --> 00:44:44,480
Speaker 1: what I'm drinking. Okay, Now, look, officer, as your chief,

705
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:46,280
Speaker 1: I have to tell you that there was a complaint

706
00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:49,480
Speaker 1: made about you. Um, a woman named Lisette said he

707
00:44:49,560 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 1: pulled her over. Um, you didn't read her her Miranda rights.

708
00:44:55,800 --> 00:45:01,440
Speaker 1: You had an impromptu corner sessh. You're saying all of

709
00:45:01,480 --> 00:45:04,680
Speaker 1: these things to me as if I did them wrong.

710
00:45:04,880 --> 00:45:07,080
Speaker 1: But I'm pretty sure I did them right. You don't

711
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:11,640
Speaker 1: read people interrupt the chief of putting people in the

712
00:45:11,640 --> 00:45:13,160
Speaker 1: corner and having a conversation with them. Can I talk

713
00:45:13,200 --> 00:45:17,600
Speaker 1: you for a second? Um, well, good, but before you stay,

714
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:19,839
Speaker 1: I feel good. Today was one of those days where

715
00:45:19,880 --> 00:45:23,279
Speaker 1: I'm like, I know my purposes. Yeah, you were saying, great,

716
00:45:23,320 --> 00:45:26,640
Speaker 1: we're gonna let you go. I can't. Yeah, well, i'm

717
00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:29,719
Speaker 1: fired too because our relationship wasn't reported and that goes

718
00:45:29,760 --> 00:45:32,359
Speaker 1: against HR. You didn't submit. Sorry, I'm just gonna leave.

719
00:45:32,400 --> 00:45:34,520
Speaker 1: If you both are fired, I'm assuming I'm good to go,

720
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:37,799
Speaker 1: So I'm just gonna kind of walk out of here. Well,

721
00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:39,600
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm not fired until I leave. The

722
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:43,640
Speaker 1: premises that right is chief of putting people in the

723
00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:47,080
Speaker 1: corner and having a conversation. I think so, and I

724
00:45:47,080 --> 00:45:49,600
Speaker 1: think through police chief is open to he just said.

725
00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:53,080
Speaker 1: He was also yes, that is also putting people in

726
00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:55,120
Speaker 1: the corner having a conversation. Well, the mayor is going

727
00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:56,960
Speaker 1: to assign the chief police and then they'll signed that

728
00:45:57,040 --> 00:45:59,319
Speaker 1: after the fact. But until that time, I guess you

729
00:45:59,320 --> 00:46:02,600
Speaker 1: can be the intern. And uh, really, I don't even

730
00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:05,360
Speaker 1: have to put in an app. I don't know. Do

731
00:46:05,400 --> 00:46:09,240
Speaker 1: you want to much realistics? I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

732
00:46:09,239 --> 00:46:12,399
Speaker 1: What did you mean by that? He said, an app

733
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:17,040
Speaker 1: to put in an app application? That appetizer. I'm not

734
00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:18,920
Speaker 1: working here anymore. Who gives a ship? I can say

735
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:24,000
Speaker 1: whatever price, And I've brought you some Jella from the cafeteria.

736
00:46:24,120 --> 00:46:28,879
Speaker 1: How you feeling, baby, it's hard with your what your

737
00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:33,560
Speaker 1: mouth wired? Shot? I know, it's just I don't know.

738
00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:38,280
Speaker 1: It's not good. It's hard to crazy that that big

739
00:46:38,440 --> 00:46:46,719
Speaker 1: accident happened. Where's my son? Where's my son? My son?

740
00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:48,960
Speaker 1: Don't let her in here, don't tell herm in here.

741
00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:51,640
Speaker 1: Please shut the door and hide me. Hey, slugger, we

742
00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:53,319
Speaker 1: found you. I just want to let you know your

743
00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:55,480
Speaker 1: mom and I are going to Bora Bora for the

744
00:46:55,560 --> 00:47:00,360
Speaker 1: week so we won't be around. Uh, this lady seems

745
00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 1: nice enough to take care of you. I just wore

746
00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:07,400
Speaker 1: the outfit so I could get in here. I'm technically

747
00:47:07,400 --> 00:47:11,719
Speaker 1: on probation. I shouldn't be. I'm not really a nurse.

748
00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:14,200
Speaker 1: I just I just wanted to make my peace with you,

749
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:18,799
Speaker 1: and I feel like I've made it. So listen, little slugger. Uh,

750
00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:20,560
Speaker 1: if you're lucky, we'll bring you back the little brother

751
00:47:20,600 --> 00:47:23,160
Speaker 1: or a little sister. You know what I mean. Oh no, please, no,

752
00:47:23,840 --> 00:47:27,640
Speaker 1: You're never gonna be my real dad, Steve, Thank you, Sevan.

753
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:29,560
Speaker 1: This is beautiful here on the island. I just I

754
00:47:29,560 --> 00:47:32,400
Speaker 1: don't feel comfortable abducting a child to bring it back.

755
00:47:33,000 --> 00:47:35,080
Speaker 1: So Josh has a little brother or sister that this

756
00:47:35,239 --> 00:47:38,200
Speaker 1: does in the National laws. Baby, it's like these little

757
00:47:38,560 --> 00:47:42,400
Speaker 1: but what are they called Bora Borys human beings? Just

758
00:47:42,480 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 1: people know these they want to come with us if

759
00:47:45,680 --> 00:47:47,600
Speaker 1: they want it. They want they want a better life.

760
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:50,520
Speaker 1: I don't know, Steve, it's just when you're like I

761
00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:53,239
Speaker 1: like Josh, I like my son that you know. I

762
00:47:53,280 --> 00:47:55,279
Speaker 1: don't know. I think it's already hard enough phrase like

763
00:47:55,360 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 1: about you it's my son. He reminds me of just

764
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:02,080
Speaker 1: family in good times, and he's so sweet and so

765
00:48:02,120 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 1: much potential to be the best person ever. And I

766
00:48:04,280 --> 00:48:06,759
Speaker 1: just see so much growth in him, so much. Here

767
00:48:06,960 --> 00:48:11,640
Speaker 1: is the Pina Colada for the lady and my taie

768
00:48:11,719 --> 00:48:14,560
Speaker 1: for the man. And again I'm just reminding you. I

769
00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:18,359
Speaker 1: feel silly saying this twice, but um, you can't keep

770
00:48:18,400 --> 00:48:22,920
Speaker 1: staring at the kids and getting closer to them. Um,

771
00:48:23,120 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 1: so people are watching. Just be cool, okay, I'm it's

772
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:29,879
Speaker 1: one of those situations though. We're like, because we're American, right,

773
00:48:29,920 --> 00:48:31,400
Speaker 1: we can like if we see something, We're like, we

774
00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:34,359
Speaker 1: could take it. I don't know where you got that impression, sir,

775
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:38,000
Speaker 1: but it certainly doesn't apply to the children here, Um

776
00:48:38,040 --> 00:48:41,440
Speaker 1: of this island. Before you leave, just letting right here

777
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:44,080
Speaker 1: in my date here and my my other You know,

778
00:48:44,120 --> 00:48:45,880
Speaker 1: when I met her on that app, she said she

779
00:48:46,000 --> 00:48:48,960
Speaker 1: liked adventure and spott in eightie okay, and I feel

780
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:50,880
Speaker 1: like those two things are starting. Do you know my

781
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:57,200
Speaker 1: name can hold quick? I gotta run the oshan Okay.

782
00:48:57,280 --> 00:49:01,560
Speaker 1: I don't think he knows. My name doesn't seem like it, so,

783
00:49:01,880 --> 00:49:05,120
Speaker 1: so tell me about this new relationship. You you said

784
00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:10,520
Speaker 1: you met on an app? Was it Jalepeno papers or

785
00:49:11,440 --> 00:49:13,759
Speaker 1: what do you mean the app that you met on?

786
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:18,239
Speaker 1: Was it haalepinio papers or was it like a buffalo things?

787
00:49:18,400 --> 00:49:23,239
Speaker 1: Bumble bumble? Okay, it's just an app, you know, it

788
00:49:23,280 --> 00:49:29,000
Speaker 1: could be you know, appetized or application. Oh yeah, yeah. Look,

789
00:49:30,200 --> 00:49:32,800
Speaker 1: I've known you for a long time, a long time,

790
00:49:33,000 --> 00:49:35,279
Speaker 1: and I've tried all these different personas. I'm trying to

791
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:37,239
Speaker 1: be like a tough guy who doesn't care right now.

792
00:49:37,239 --> 00:49:39,400
Speaker 1: But it doesn't work because the truth is, so you

793
00:49:39,440 --> 00:49:43,680
Speaker 1: always seem like the same guy. What do you mean

794
00:49:44,160 --> 00:49:47,080
Speaker 1: there wasn't a for me because I know you. Because

795
00:49:47,120 --> 00:49:49,960
Speaker 1: I know you, he's the same guy. Yeah, because anybody

796
00:49:49,960 --> 00:49:52,720
Speaker 1: else would be like distinct differently, a whole different person.

797
00:49:52,840 --> 00:50:00,520
Speaker 1: Are you saying penis around your daughter? Yeah? So that

798
00:50:00,600 --> 00:50:04,279
Speaker 1: sucked out, that that part worked out? Do you what

799
00:50:04,360 --> 00:50:05,640
Speaker 1: did you do for fun? Do you ever do any

800
00:50:05,680 --> 00:50:10,279
Speaker 1: activities down? I like to tape my patients. I mean

801
00:50:10,320 --> 00:50:16,160
Speaker 1: like extreme sports. Extreme sports like like a bunch of jump,

802
00:50:16,800 --> 00:50:18,920
Speaker 1: like a bungee jump, but with a rifle in your

803
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:21,919
Speaker 1: hand that's full of little paintballs. No, No, I've never

804
00:50:21,960 --> 00:50:25,600
Speaker 1: done that alright, So right over here is a fantastic

805
00:50:25,600 --> 00:50:30,000
Speaker 1: spot to paraglide. But when we just set up camp here, um,

806
00:50:30,120 --> 00:50:31,800
Speaker 1: I don't know if you all believe in sasquats, but

807
00:50:31,800 --> 00:50:33,120
Speaker 1: there has been like some a lot of sightings in

808
00:50:33,160 --> 00:50:35,080
Speaker 1: the area. So why don't we just take a second

809
00:50:35,080 --> 00:50:38,000
Speaker 1: here before we just get our suits ready and everything's

810
00:50:38,040 --> 00:50:41,080
Speaker 1: set up, just maybe sit in silence. Maybe here some knocking,

811
00:50:41,880 --> 00:50:45,640
Speaker 1: maybe here's some calls from how many sightings has been

812
00:50:46,480 --> 00:50:51,719
Speaker 1: out here? Hundreds hundreds. We're paragliding, right, so do you

813
00:50:51,760 --> 00:50:54,520
Speaker 1: see them like in the sky? Is it like it

814
00:50:54,560 --> 00:50:57,200
Speaker 1: seems like a land problem? Oh? For sure, I know,

815
00:50:57,239 --> 00:50:58,520
Speaker 1: but we have to be we're right, you know, right

816
00:50:58,520 --> 00:51:01,080
Speaker 1: here on this giant like you know, a face and

817
00:51:01,160 --> 00:51:06,760
Speaker 1: so sorry, Also, can I just say you are beautiful? Oh?

818
00:51:06,840 --> 00:51:07,920
Speaker 1: I just want to say it. I just want to

819
00:51:07,920 --> 00:51:11,439
Speaker 1: put it out there. Everyone's beautiful. No, I'm not so.

820
00:51:11,680 --> 00:51:14,759
Speaker 1: Do you have a picture, a picture of the sasquatch picture? Yeah?

821
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:19,120
Speaker 1: Hold on second, actually hold a second, kind of like

822
00:51:19,160 --> 00:51:21,680
Speaker 1: this right here, just finished taking a leak. You know,

823
00:51:21,920 --> 00:51:26,359
Speaker 1: when you're out here in the whole world, that's a man.

824
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:29,279
Speaker 1: It's a man. It's not even that tall, What the

825
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:33,120
Speaker 1: hell's around his pelvic? Here is sasquats, I'm gonna drop off.

826
00:51:36,920 --> 00:51:42,640
Speaker 1: It's okay. Everyone start clapping. Everyone's start clacking. See that's

827
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:46,680
Speaker 1: our show, Ladies and gentlemen. Let's thank each of the

828
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Speaker 1: alchemists separately. Jackie gonzalas Dorothy, thank you so much, what

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00:51:51,960 --> 00:51:55,160
Speaker 1: a great time. This episode is gonna drop March first.

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00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:58,239
Speaker 1: Anything you want to promote or I'll say this, And

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00:51:58,480 --> 00:52:00,360
Speaker 1: I don't know when the episode comes out, so it

832
00:52:00,440 --> 00:52:02,319
Speaker 1: might come out after March one, or it might come

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00:52:02,320 --> 00:52:04,680
Speaker 1: out before. But either way, if you keep your eyes

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00:52:04,760 --> 00:52:09,600
Speaker 1: peeled on the podcast, give me that D, which sounds gross,

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00:52:09,600 --> 00:52:12,839
Speaker 1: but it's actually about It's actually about Disney. It's such

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00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:18,480
Speaker 1: about Disney Channel original movies. I am reviewing Double Teams,

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00:52:18,520 --> 00:52:22,239
Speaker 1: which also sounds gross, but isn't about a gang bang.

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00:52:22,600 --> 00:52:25,919
Speaker 1: It's a Disney Channel original movie about two twins who

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00:52:26,000 --> 00:52:29,880
Speaker 1: play basketball to identical twins who are played by people

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00:52:29,880 --> 00:52:32,719
Speaker 1: who are not related at all. So just google give

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00:52:32,760 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 1: me that D. Double Team at jacky okay. Chris Alvarado,

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00:52:41,480 --> 00:52:43,960
Speaker 1: First of all, Craig, I think I speak for everyone.

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00:52:44,760 --> 00:52:47,120
Speaker 1: Wonderful job hosting. We want, we want to hear more

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00:52:47,239 --> 00:52:49,440
Speaker 1: of you, I think, and the fans are saying that too.

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00:52:49,520 --> 00:52:51,680
Speaker 1: We want to hear more on the whole thing. Yeah,

846
00:52:51,719 --> 00:52:53,640
Speaker 1: I think we will devote one of these just to

847
00:52:53,719 --> 00:52:56,280
Speaker 1: me talking about my acting career. Yeah. I love that idea.

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00:52:56,440 --> 00:52:59,840
Speaker 1: I love that idea. Um, I'm I'm doing great. Future.

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Speaker 1: If you're listening back, everything's fine, You're healthy. I woke

850
00:53:02,760 --> 00:53:06,239
Speaker 1: up this morning, I just scrolled the various social media

851
00:53:06,280 --> 00:53:11,680
Speaker 1: science is really quickly came across um Patrick Babbitt's Instagram

852
00:53:11,880 --> 00:53:16,839
Speaker 1: with uh, dude, dude. He has a new shortcoming out,

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00:53:16,880 --> 00:53:21,200
Speaker 1: written and by and starring both he and Jackie. And

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00:53:21,280 --> 00:53:24,200
Speaker 1: on the cover there's Molly Erdman. Uh cover, you know,

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00:53:24,280 --> 00:53:27,200
Speaker 1: on the poster the thing it's called Lump. I'm like

856
00:53:27,760 --> 00:53:31,080
Speaker 1: genuinely super excited to see this. It seems like it

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00:53:31,080 --> 00:53:33,279
Speaker 1: will be streaming in March. It's gonna be part of

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Speaker 1: a short film festival. Tell us more about this, Jackie. Wow,

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00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:40,239
Speaker 1: all of those things are very accurate. Um. It will

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00:53:40,239 --> 00:53:42,160
Speaker 1: be streaming up as part of the l A Film

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00:53:42,239 --> 00:53:46,520
Speaker 1: Festival in March. Pat and I wrote it, We co

862
00:53:46,680 --> 00:53:50,239
Speaker 1: star in it. It is off based off of real

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00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:54,959
Speaker 1: events to us and uh, we have some fun fun

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00:53:55,080 --> 00:53:57,920
Speaker 1: friends in there. It's funny, it's a good time. Jackie.

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Speaker 1: You had your chance to promote that earlier. You're cutting

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00:53:59,680 --> 00:54:04,080
Speaker 1: into that's it. Thank you. But yeah, that sounds awesome

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00:54:04,120 --> 00:54:06,000
Speaker 1: and I definitely want to see that. That sounds really cool.

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Speaker 1: Caroline Cotter. Yeah, just um, I don't know what to say.

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Speaker 1: I just you know, happy to be here, happy to

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00:54:13,960 --> 00:54:18,440
Speaker 1: be alive. Um, every day's a gift. And yeah, I

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00:54:18,560 --> 00:54:22,600
Speaker 1: just remember that. Yeah, every day is a gift. James Heeney.

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00:54:22,719 --> 00:54:27,640
Speaker 1: On March eight pm at the West Side Comedy Theater,

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00:54:28,160 --> 00:54:31,800
Speaker 1: Bear Supply will have their second show since the pandemic,

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00:54:32,200 --> 00:54:33,799
Speaker 1: and I hope you're there at eight pm. It's gonna

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00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:36,160
Speaker 1: be great. Oh you bailed out a trailer voice just

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00:54:36,200 --> 00:54:39,719
Speaker 1: a little too too early. Oh was that trip? I

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00:54:39,760 --> 00:54:42,480
Speaker 1: guess it was. I just was sounded incredible. Thank you.

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00:54:42,800 --> 00:54:46,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'll work on maintaining my character for a

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00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:52,160
Speaker 1: longer period of time. No, Joey Greer, Hi, I also

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00:54:52,200 --> 00:54:56,120
Speaker 1: want to say March em comedy here. Ticket link is

881
00:54:56,120 --> 00:54:59,720
Speaker 1: already up on the site. You're gonna see myself, Caroline Cotter.

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00:54:59,800 --> 00:55:01,200
Speaker 1: She's are to confirm whether she wants to do it

883
00:55:01,320 --> 00:55:05,120
Speaker 1: or not. James he might be there, might not, we'll

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00:55:05,160 --> 00:55:08,760
Speaker 1: see what happens. And Sean Boylan maybe some other people.

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00:55:08,920 --> 00:55:11,760
Speaker 1: Check it out if you're in the Los Angeles area.

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Speaker 1: Also check out WESTID Comedy Theater dot com for other shows.

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00:55:14,640 --> 00:55:19,759
Speaker 1: It's great theater awesome. Let's thank our engineering producer Doug Baine,

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00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:24,040
Speaker 1: the fine folks at i Heeart Media. Please write to

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00:55:24,120 --> 00:55:26,080
Speaker 1: us it up gem you this email at gmail dot com.

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Speaker 1: Until next time,