00:00:08 Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear. But you're a guest to my home. You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no guests, Your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff, So how did you dare. 00:00:36 Speaker 2: To surbey me? Welcome to? I said, no gifts. I'm Bridger Wineger. We're in the backyard as usual. There's a bird right on cue. 00:00:58 Speaker 1: I like that. 00:01:00 Speaker 2: What's going on? My friends Hannah and Chloe dropped off one of those Costco cookies that everyone's been crowing about that's sitting in my house. I took a bite of it moments ago, just moments ago, and I will probably be texting them later that it's fine. It's a fine cookie. That could change if I finish it. I should probably at least make my way halfway through before you know, deciding. We'll see what happens. But who cares. Let's talk to the guest. I adore him. It's Kyle Kanane. Kyle, how are you welcome to? I said, no gifts? 00:01:37 Speaker 3: Thank you for having me. 00:01:38 Speaker 2: How are you feeling? 00:01:39 Speaker 3: I'm I'm kind of curious about this cookie? 00:01:41 Speaker 1: Now? 00:01:42 Speaker 2: Have you heard about this cookie? 00:01:43 Speaker 1: No? 00:01:44 Speaker 2: It's like whenever Costco does something new, it makes waves all over the internet. It's a there's something. People just they're very curious as to what. 00:01:54 Speaker 3: I think. 00:01:55 Speaker 2: They don't change things very often. 00:01:57 Speaker 3: I think Costco is of the people. Yes, I think now we uh we champion Costco because it was the guy said he'd fucking kills some but like literally said he'd fucking kill whoever changes the price of the hot dog special, like use those words exactly. Like I think we like this guy. I think this guy is one of us. 00:02:14 Speaker 2: He's kind of our president. Yeah. 00:02:16 Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know who he is. I don't know many more details, but based on that alone, yeah, I've. 00:02:19 Speaker 2: Heard it's a decent place to work. But yeah, they don't change anything very often. But they got rid of their churo and they've brought in this chocolate chip cookies. 00:02:27 Speaker 3: Oh okay, and. 00:02:28 Speaker 2: It's like eight hundred calories or something, and. 00:02:30 Speaker 3: It's more plussed by it. 00:02:32 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's fine. I mean I eat a lot of cookies and I'm kind of a cookie snob. Oh, I feel like anyone can be cookies. You can make them at home and become a cookie snob immediately. 00:02:45 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not hard to do it well right. As someone who's never made cookies, what Okay, as a cookie snob, may ask you, what is your lowest form of acceptable cookie where you like you kind of don't want to admit. 00:02:57 Speaker 2: Oh, that's interesting. I will eat all almost any cookie, okay, like in desperation, but I will say there are some like I've got some new cookies I won't eat. Ooh, I had some from Milk Bar, which used to be kind of a fancy I mean like it was a cool bakery at one point. Yeah, these were the worst cookies. These were one of the worst foods I've ever tasted. 00:03:22 Speaker 3: Wow, because I remember they came in like a gift box, right when something when the packaging is too. 00:03:28 Speaker 2: Nice where it's like, oh, this was a robot touched this. 00:03:32 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah yeah. Do you ever get like a takeout from Sugarfish and it comes in like the same packaging as an iMac You know, this could be ten dollars cheaper if you didn't have to use magnets to close the box. 00:03:42 Speaker 2: For my effect is a maculate. It's crazy. 00:03:45 Speaker 3: I mean it feels it does have a psychological effect of like, well this is good because I feel bad throwing out the box it came in. 00:03:54 Speaker 2: Yeah, it just feels so pure. But yeah, those milk bar cookies are now on my list of not happening. Wow, I feel like cookies are kind of having a moment. 00:04:03 Speaker 3: Finally something started. Though, Let's take regular stuff we can all access easily and really doll it up, let's really trot it out. I think it was I think it was the pinkberry is when I first noticed, Like we're like, oh, but it's but we should get in the line for the pink but like and then you have it. I was not like I I can't get gummy bears or anything in there, like what I've had a tcby and and you went there because thirty one Flavors was closed or too far away, like I guess what was yogurt? And then people went nuts about pink beer. And I think that was to me noticing the escalation of what if it was just cupcakes? I'm like, well, what if that business is something else in six months? And thens yeah, yeah, yeah, doughnuts. It was tacos. We did celebrate talk but tacos are still kept. I mean those are still the trucks. I like that. 00:04:58 Speaker 2: Yeah, you can still access them through other but there, well, they have had a moment of like they're now at places in a taco cost six dollars, which makes no sense. 00:05:05 Speaker 3: The Chicken Chicken had its hey day burgers. They're making fancy birds. 00:05:09 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I mean smash burgers right now. 00:05:11 Speaker 3: Yeah, we had to reinvent things to charge more money. And they're okay, all right, all right, that's not just Los Angeles. 00:05:17 Speaker 2: But yeah, that's what's happening with cookies right now. 00:05:20 Speaker 3: So we're not getting sponsored by Milk Barny. 00:05:22 Speaker 2: But you know, they can take their money elsewhere. Wow, they can sponsor whatever podcast they want, but their money is no good here. 00:05:29 Speaker 3: I like this a bold stance for a podcast to openly deny sponsorship from something that the host professes to enjoy the concept. 00:05:36 Speaker 2: Of well, you know, but this will bring in other bakeries with a good product strategy. It's pure strategy. It's my chest game. 00:05:45 Speaker 3: Oh man, I won't figure out something I can distress. 00:05:48 Speaker 2: Right now, I will do you know what I'll recommend. I think that this might be a Portland company's called I think show Stopper cookies delicious, just very basic chocolate chip cookies. 00:05:57 Speaker 3: Called showstopper believe. 00:05:59 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I want I'm gonna make sure because that would be devastating for the bakery if i'm you know what if there's another bakery called show stopper. 00:06:07 Speaker 3: I mean, my cookies come by the sleeve, so I don't. I can't say that I've ever like individually. 00:06:13 Speaker 2: Yeah, showstopper really for cookies? All right? 00:06:16 Speaker 3: You know what? Based on this alone, now I'm getting excited about. I'll give it a whor. 00:06:19 Speaker 2: You're eating out of a sleeve an oreo chips a hoy. 00:06:23 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, chips ahwai. Took me too late in life to realize it was a nautical reference. 00:06:29 Speaker 2: You know, it's hidden there and. 00:06:31 Speaker 3: They don't make any it's just the name. It's just the pun. You don't see it. 00:06:35 Speaker 2: There's no boat, there's no little sailor boat with a cookie in it or something. 00:06:39 Speaker 3: It's the boat. So like, yeah, chips ahoy, we're sending the the chips off to war. 00:06:44 Speaker 2: I guess in a battleship a destroyer. Yeah. 00:06:48 Speaker 3: I'm not sure what the hoy is was used for in nautical terms. 00:06:53 Speaker 2: Do they still say does the navy use a hoy? 00:06:56 Speaker 3: Does it mean that they're leaving or they're coming in. 00:06:58 Speaker 2: I feel it's like it's there. It's like the Yeah, the thing is in the distance, or it's we're approaching things. 00:07:05 Speaker 3: Where are the boats. Oh they're a hoy you know around or a hoy kind of over there. 00:07:11 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's a I do like a chip's ahoy. I mean, but I consider almost a different type of food than a cookie. 00:07:18 Speaker 3: It's like, this is the snob coming out. This is the I mean, no fence. We're just meeting now, but I can see them. 00:07:24 Speaker 2: It's uh, it's so dry. 00:07:26 Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's not good. 00:07:29 Speaker 2: It is good, No, I mean it does something to your mouth that's not unpleasant. 00:07:33 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's I gotta have it with milk, yeah, because you'll you'll choke you but you'll it's like eating sand. It's not great. I'm sorry. Now we're talking about big time money with the chip with the Nibisco people. That's right, and that's why we're backing off. I see where it's at. I see where we're going. 00:07:47 Speaker 2: I will take the Bisco money any day. 00:07:49 Speaker 3: I'm a nil awafer guy, you are, I do. That is a bold thing for them to abbreviate in that way. 00:07:55 Speaker 2: You're so, you'll just have a box of Nila wafers. 00:07:58 Speaker 3: Oh, it's got to have. You gotta have something to It's a duncable. 00:08:01 Speaker 2: Right, But like you're not. I mean I only consider a Nilla wafer as something you put in like a banana pudding. 00:08:06 Speaker 3: Okay, So now, as a cookie snob, are you talking non duncable cookie? Like is that like? Is that like putting ice in your wine too? 00:08:13 Speaker 2: Absolutely not. I'll okay, all right, some cookies need the little hydration. 00:08:19 Speaker 3: Yeah, you gotta revive them, right, I gotta let them know that they're they're up to bat. 00:08:25 Speaker 2: So it's lunchtime right now. I'm just now. 00:08:27 Speaker 3: I just want all cookies. I'll finish this one. 00:08:29 Speaker 2: You didn't like, well, I don't not like it costco I haven't the jury is still out. I might love the cookie as of right now. It's fine, but it was only the edge of the cookie. But Milla wafers, you'll just be like, I want some Nilla wafers. 00:08:45 Speaker 3: Yeah, I enjoy it. I enjoy a Nila. 00:08:47 Speaker 2: I try that. I haven't eaten just a Nilo wafer since preschool. Really, yeah, I remember enjoying them. 00:08:54 Speaker 3: It's a simple, and they're kind of like it goes good with a custard. 00:08:57 Speaker 2: You're not wrong, right, And they're kind of thee suly, kind of almost puffy. Is that right? 00:09:02 Speaker 3: It's like sandstone. 00:09:06 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not pure saying. It's like a little structure there cliff at. 00:09:10 Speaker 3: The beach where you're like, well, you can't climb it and it'll just crumble underneath you, but. 00:09:13 Speaker 2: You can admire it. 00:09:14 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 00:09:16 Speaker 2: Have you? I mean, you've never made a cookie? Have you ever made a dip? I'm going to a dip party this weekend and I've been thinking about I've never made a dip. 00:09:23 Speaker 3: Wow, we hit in my wheelhouses here again, not not a creator, but definitely an enjoyer dips? Now, are we? Is it open ended? They didn't tell you anything else to do? 00:09:38 Speaker 2: Just dip? 00:09:40 Speaker 3: Can I ask what you're planning on? Are you fishing? Friedy? 00:09:42 Speaker 2: I'm fishing for ideas. The only thing that's crossed my mind is something with a white bean. But I think that maybe because the host of the party once made me a white bean soup. But I feel like like people will pure white beans with you know, garlic or oil or something. 00:09:57 Speaker 3: Okay, I'm I want Pyramidwest right away. I'm like, all right, well, we need a sour cream base. Sour cream or cottage cheese. It's some sort of cream cheese based cottage cheese. 00:10:08 Speaker 2: I'm a big cottage cheese eater. 00:10:09 Speaker 3: Really, yes, did you ever this was just a snack in our house. Was just cottage cheese with French dressing. Oh squirted right? 00:10:21 Speaker 2: French dressing is so sweet. 00:10:23 Speaker 3: I feel like I tarnished my family name by bringing that up. Now that's yeah, well, cottage cheese is not sweet, so you gottadd something to make it sweet. 00:10:31 Speaker 2: There's something about that that I can't really picture French dressing. Actually, I think I was initially picturing Russian dressing, which is that thing about the same? Oh it is, okay, Yeah, I'm not on board with this idea anyway to make a wet thing wetter. 00:10:45 Speaker 3: I'm sorry to have miss stepped. I think it's making it wetter. I think you're just loosening it up. The Kurds a bit, just had a little viscosity. 00:10:52 Speaker 2: You don't need to be any looser than they are. It's already writing the line textually. 00:10:56 Speaker 3: That's that says a lot because now being raised that way. I do always cottage cheese a little a little thick for my blood. Can we can we dash it with something anything, Let's get creative. Yeah, just run it down. I need a little soupier than when it's coming. 00:11:13 Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe that's the dip. I take just a cottage cheese and like a gallon of water. 00:11:17 Speaker 3: I mean, that's all Pinkberry was. That's it's just the yogurt. 00:11:23 Speaker 2: It's just pure yogurt. 00:11:25 Speaker 3: There's but I just the Stockholm syndrome of people like yeah, but it's like got a tartness to it. Yeah, because it's plain yogurt. 00:11:33 Speaker 2: So it's no longer a treat. 00:11:34 Speaker 3: Because it's not vanilla, which is what we all liked before they did this. 00:11:41 Speaker 2: Pinkberry has seen much better days. I feel like they are on their way out. 00:11:44 Speaker 3: Well, I mean didn't the like the air to it. Clabra homeless guy Like there's a very. 00:11:50 Speaker 2: Tragic story wedding. 00:11:51 Speaker 3: Yeah, like the woman who invented her son or something got in trouble for like Clobra, a homeless guy in an offer. I hope I got this details. 00:11:59 Speaker 2: At least look into the tails. I mean we got the cookies. Serious, yeah, against a yogurt air. 00:12:06 Speaker 3: Old Pinkberry's son. 00:12:08 Speaker 2: He Pinkberry a homeless guy like the first crime. 00:12:13 Speaker 3: Wow, there was something. 00:12:15 Speaker 2: That I mean in my mind that makes sense. 00:12:18 Speaker 3: Oh you think because he's just been rolling like a like a snobby team with all that. 00:12:22 Speaker 4: Fourteenth twenty fourteen, I'm looking at an LA Times article that says Pinkberry co founder gets seven years for beating homeless man. 00:12:30 Speaker 2: Wow. Okay, Wow, that's tart. Wow. So he's out of prison, I guess. 00:12:38 Speaker 1: So. 00:12:40 Speaker 3: Hopefully making amends hopefully, you know. Oh my gorchizing TCB. Why Wow. 00:12:46 Speaker 2: I wonder if he's still involved in the yogurt or if they've pushed him out, or maybe he ran it from prison like a mob boss. 00:12:52 Speaker 3: Yeah. Do you think he was untouchable in there? 00:12:54 Speaker 2: He probably was. 00:12:55 Speaker 3: No, that's the yogurt boy. Leave him alone. 00:13:00 Speaker 2: Yeah, Dip, you didn't offer a single. 00:13:03 Speaker 3: Sorry, didn't we? Yeah? I really just went right to French. 00:13:06 Speaker 2: Came in my head. 00:13:06 Speaker 3: I got I got excited about the idea of a lot of dips that I just want right to French. Onions. 00:13:10 Speaker 2: Onion is good, it's such a classic. 00:13:13 Speaker 3: How can you reinvent it right? 00:13:16 Speaker 2: How do you bring some French dressing. French dressing, French dressing, onion, and cottage cheese. 00:13:23 Speaker 3: I am not opposed to this at all. I mean, I'm trash, all right. If we haven't established trash, I know. Okay, well, then what are we arguing. 00:13:31 Speaker 2: For that we need to come together on something? I mean, maybe what I do is if I can just kind of slither into the party and put it on the table, no one's gonna even eat it anyway. There there are gonna be so many dips that it doesn't matter. 00:13:43 Speaker 3: Slither is a pointed choice of words right there, when describing the dip we're coming up with. Right now, let me slip in with this bowl of loose soup that I've got. I you know what, now I'm now I'm trying to think of dips because okay, hummus you can dress up a lot of isn't what's hummus. 00:14:02 Speaker 2: Is chickpea, right, yes? 00:14:03 Speaker 3: And you can finagle that with a lot of additions, make it your own, right, so blank canvas French onions, your French onion. And I'm trying to think of what other dip? What are we eating the dip with? 00:14:15 Speaker 2: Well, that's the other question. I mean, I think the dip dictates what you're going to be dippinga. 00:14:20 Speaker 3: Is it hot dip? Is it cold dip? I think it should be. 00:14:22 Speaker 2: A cold dip because it's just me on a table, you know. I don't a hot dip will be cold immediately. 00:14:26 Speaker 3: Okay, good point. 00:14:29 Speaker 2: I mean, what guacamole, But I don't really consider that a dip. I feel like that's its own thing you look at, you know. 00:14:37 Speaker 3: And this is where I got to ask more about the host. How how much are they going to play on the technicalities. Are they going to be a stickler about the I think. 00:14:43 Speaker 2: They're going to be a stickler. I mean the emails is they love dip? 00:14:47 Speaker 3: Could you argue for guacamole as being a dip because essentially you're not going to eat it with just a spoon? I do that what you can do and what you should do are different things. 00:14:58 Speaker 2: Well, the very good point. 00:14:59 Speaker 3: Yeah, I I've turned a bowl of chili into dip because I've just eaten it. 00:15:03 Speaker 2: With tortilla essentially. I mean, every soup's a dip. 00:15:06 Speaker 3: If you I've yeah, mowed through a half bag of tortillas because I'm like, I'm going to dirty a spoon. I got these chips. I got this dippable item. 00:15:17 Speaker 2: Yeah. Most soup is just a dip standing still. 00:15:20 Speaker 3: You just yeah corn, cornstarch in and a thicket up. 00:15:23 Speaker 2: Oh interesting, that sounds awful. Put that in some chicken noodle and that's your dip. 00:15:29 Speaker 3: That's you know, it says a thicks that's we just let it sit for a while. You break through the skin, there's dip under there. 00:15:35 Speaker 2: I brought my famous chicken noodle dip. 00:15:38 Speaker 3: But I mean, okay, cream mushroom, which I was just talking about, what classic additive of every Midwestern castle. 00:15:46 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true. You've put that in some green beans and some crispies. 00:15:50 Speaker 3: Yeah, it was always in the cupboard. You never had it by itself. 00:15:53 Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, that's an ingredient, purely ingredient. Yeah. 00:15:56 Speaker 3: Oh we got soup. That's not it says soup. But that goes well. 00:16:01 Speaker 2: To warm up a bowl of cream of mushroom and just eat that. 00:16:03 Speaker 3: I would absolutely do it. I like soup, I like mushrooms. I'm not seeing a problem here. 00:16:10 Speaker 2: Have you tried it? 00:16:11 Speaker 3: Oh, eating the cream of mushroom? Yeah, and then it throws off the holiday because like, what happened to the ingredients? I'm like, well, I ate them because it says soups. Yeah, like, oh no, that was that was for another thing, Like, well, don't call it soup, just call it additive. 00:16:25 Speaker 2: It should just be Campbell's additive. 00:16:27 Speaker 3: Yeah, Campbell's. This shouldn't be consumed by itself. Cream of mushroom, have that little poison? Yeah yeah, leave it alone. It's it's look the same shape as the rest of the soups. Okay, we're talking dip. What if you're changing what you put into the dip? 00:16:43 Speaker 2: What do you mean, like, not a cracker. 00:16:46 Speaker 3: Everybody's doing crackers. And tell me if I'm just too excited about this and you want to change the subject at any point, but because what they're going to go? Veggies? 00:16:57 Speaker 2: Right, some old celery. 00:16:58 Speaker 3: You're just talking about cookie dessert? 00:17:01 Speaker 2: Oh my god? Interesting? 00:17:04 Speaker 3: Or some sweet dip? Wow with a nilo wafer a neutral? Yeah, you want the dipping agent to be to be benign, right, And it's exciting in the bowl. 00:17:16 Speaker 2: Right, And the nilla wafer is so unbelievably dry, it's essentially a chip. 00:17:20 Speaker 3: Nobody's gonna eat them all by themselves, right, that's all right, sweet dips. Sweet dips, which what a nickname for either one of us. 00:17:29 Speaker 2: I think that's a great, great plan. I mean, I'll have to separate it from the savory dips because you don't want somebody running into that. 00:17:37 Speaker 3: Putting a celery stick in there, right, Although that was like the better homes and gardens yellow recipes of the forties and fifties always had vegetables in the right. 00:17:46 Speaker 2: Have you ever had that? 00:17:48 Speaker 3: I think my grandmother did it once and we were horrified. 00:17:52 Speaker 2: Probably with carrots. 00:17:54 Speaker 3: I think I think it was celery. I mean, just anything like and you know, as a kid, jello, you're excited about jello. Sure, but then you see anything floating around, They're like, well it's been polluted. 00:18:05 Speaker 2: It looks like a mistake has been made. 00:18:06 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like we can't Oh there's a mosquito in dish. Yeah, this is like Jurassic by now, the end of society because we preserved something we should now uh yeah. And I think but I was like, just be nice and eat it. Trying to excavate horrible, yeah, trying to pull out these intruders. 00:18:23 Speaker 2: I mean, I can almost argue for carrots because there's carrot cake, and you can like grate them, so it's not unbelievably intrusive. 00:18:31 Speaker 3: That's what because I love carrot cake too. But if you actually got a chunk of carrot and carrot cake, how upset would you be? 00:18:39 Speaker 2: Oh my god, it would feel like a finger. 00:18:41 Speaker 3: Yeah, what the hell is this? Have a carrots? 00:18:49 Speaker 2: Is carrot cake? No? 00:18:50 Speaker 3: No? By name only, that's what are you doing. 00:18:53 Speaker 2: I didn't want to actually experience the carrot. 00:18:56 Speaker 3: I'm actually wondering where is carrots? Right? 00:18:58 Speaker 2: You don't taste the carrot. 00:19:00 Speaker 3: You never if you saw a hint of carrot, you'd be upset. Other than the frosting orange. 00:19:05 Speaker 2: Carrot on there. 00:19:07 Speaker 3: That's the only de cater right. If you ate it, Norman, you wouldn't call it carrot cake. If you just tasted it and had to name. 00:19:13 Speaker 2: No, No, I would say this is like a ginger cake or something like that. Walnuts, walnuts? 00:19:20 Speaker 3: Right? 00:19:21 Speaker 2: Interesting? 00:19:22 Speaker 3: Well, I think sweet dip. 00:19:24 Speaker 2: Sweet, I'm gonna go. I'm okay, I'm not gonna promise. I want the party host to freak out if I end up with the savory dip. But I would really be the star of the party with the sweet dip. 00:19:34 Speaker 3: You'd blow people's minds. 00:19:35 Speaker 2: Yeah, people are gonna freak out. Yeah, well, I do think we should change the subject because there's something I want to talk about. I was really excited to have you here today, of course, you know, I thought we would have a nice time. I thought we would, you know, I would get some advice on dips and then send you on your way. So I was a little surprised the podcast is called. I said, no gifts, and here you twenty five minutes late. Okay, yeah, rude already that. Yeah, and immediately tell me you've got a gift. 00:20:10 Speaker 3: Okay, I admittedly it's coming right now. If we can hear. 00:20:14 Speaker 2: That, yeah, it's it's an elephant. 00:20:17 Speaker 3: I gotcha. I got you another fountain. I don't know if you know that this one's just for dips, though. 00:20:24 Speaker 2: You got me a cho it's a ranch. It's a ranch fountain or whatever. 00:20:28 Speaker 3: You know. It depends on how you hook it up. No, I know that was the I know that's the Tyler Show. And but I also you know the theme song. You mentioned that you have too many things already. Sure, but so I took that to heart. I didn't want to. I'm sorry to disrespect the Tyler Show. But I it would be rude to show up empty handed. 00:20:50 Speaker 2: Right, Okay, got it? The logic, there's tracks enough. 00:20:54 Speaker 3: Okay, So I want, like if I can show you all a lot with the gift that I got for you, and uh, forgive me. I got one of those I got one of those phone cases that's just always greasy. 00:21:05 Speaker 2: Oh my phone is essentially dipped in butter. 00:21:08 Speaker 3: I don't know how well. I mean the very Greasyoki's and dip top. I mean I think we can track back to why. Okay, So this is let me find here. 00:21:20 Speaker 2: You go very excited to see what this is. Oh my god? 00:21:23 Speaker 1: What is? 00:21:24 Speaker 2: Okay? So it's a certificate of adoption. This certifies that a star has been adopted for Bridger. Oh my god, I've got a lot to say about this from the nonprofit Adopted Star Program to support the scientific research efforts of an international team of astronomers. Now that seems like a loose group that doesn't seem sanctioned by anybody. I didn't like read print the White Dwarf Research Corporation, And I'm okay. So the adopted Star is t C three four five seven six one three three nobody touch it. 00:21:53 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it's Kyle claimed. 00:21:56 Speaker 2: This is the second star I own. I'm taking over the galaxy. 00:21:59 Speaker 3: Did somebody do this for you already? 00:22:00 Speaker 2: Karen Kilgeroff gave me a star years ago, and the whole time, I've been kind of craving another star. I love real estate. 00:22:10 Speaker 3: You know what that is? The smart move is to invest in real estate. 00:22:14 Speaker 2: It's always going up. So now I own two stars I'm taking I'm becoming kind of a Darth Vader type. 00:22:20 Speaker 3: Oh I didn't you know. If I knew, if I knew it was going to go to a sinister place, I may have not. 00:22:26 Speaker 2: Right, You've given me an edge on everyone. I can't imagine anybody else's adopted too. 00:22:30 Speaker 3: This does seem like it's the Airbnb rules are going to come down on you. I mean thousands of years from now, but they're gonna be like, listen, are you living on the star? 00:22:40 Speaker 2: Intergalactic skis at least or at least. 00:22:42 Speaker 3: Six months out of the year. I was very excited because when I thought of the idea, but also the agency would could give you how you would like to choose the. 00:22:53 Speaker 2: Star and how does that work? 00:22:54 Speaker 3: Well, it was it was you know, you could like look like, oh, here's certain galaxies where you can it's not gonna be when you could see. But then one of the categories was brightest star available, and I just thought, for what a I mean, if that's not a casting agency already, I don't know what what we like? That alone right there, brightest star available. 00:23:17 Speaker 2: That's such a I was. I was so excited that that's how I got. 00:23:24 Speaker 3: To choose it. 00:23:24 Speaker 2: Level of the losers. 00:23:27 Speaker 3: All right, we need we need somebody big, somebody naming like all right, not available. 00:23:31 Speaker 2: Who's who's got this weekend off? Is this like a sort from uh the price load a high situation where you do that on Amazon? 00:23:46 Speaker 3: And that's just kind of rude to ask, isn't it a gift? Which is kind of not It's not real. 00:23:51 Speaker 2: It's like it is it the little box you check and then it like sorts them. 00:23:55 Speaker 3: Uh well, yeah, I just gave you the different way to choose the stars, and I, admittedly for comedic purposes, I thought I chose the right one. 00:24:04 Speaker 2: So I've got the brightest one of as of some time ago. 00:24:09 Speaker 3: It does yea as of as of last night. 00:24:11 Speaker 2: Right, Okay, so what were the other options? For sorting. 00:24:16 Speaker 3: I think for five dollars more. 00:24:18 Speaker 2: Oh my god, So they that should be just a thing, it should just be part of the package. I didn't. 00:24:24 Speaker 3: Well, the first page was you could name the first search result, you could name a star for free, but that one wasn't loading correctly on my phone, so I had to go to the next search option down and they they did a lot of ship talking on the name of Star for Free site, like there's a real caddy subculture in the star naming business, which then that I didn't go to bed till about a quarter to four this morning, and some of us was in regards to the gift, not all of it, but there was part of it where there's a bit of a I mean wormholes, that's a that's a cosmic term as it. But that's yeah. So like name is star for Free? I'm like, oh, so that's interesting. And then the page was all it was a bad website. We have a bad website. 00:25:09 Speaker 2: I have one of those little under instruction graphics and it was. 00:25:12 Speaker 3: Like it wouldn't shrink down to the phone. 00:25:15 Speaker 2: Wee yeah. 00:25:16 Speaker 3: And so then the next website is like naming a star for free? Is it worth it? And I was like, no stake situation, That's what I'm like, Well, what do you have to say about Like the stars that you're naming, they might not even be out there. They could just be yanking your chain. This one, here's a verifiable star. So apparently some people complained about the first leg. I named a star for free, and you gave me coordinates and it's bumpkus out there. 00:25:42 Speaker 2: I went there. 00:25:43 Speaker 3: Yeah, I wanted no on like this this site, the one I got you. That's they're going to give you their own NASA linked map with coordinates. 00:25:53 Speaker 2: So I could go there. Yeah, get in a fight with anybody who shows up. 00:25:56 Speaker 3: Yeah, and if there's just a night you're out here and you're having a low night, you know, you just cookies are bumming you out. It wasn't the best dip of the thing. You're like, I don't know if I'm maybe if I'm not cut out for this business anymore. 00:26:08 Speaker 2: You look at this guy, you. 00:26:10 Speaker 3: Just know, Hey, out there somewhere, Bridger is the brightest star available waiting for me. Yeah. 00:26:15 Speaker 2: I've got two options. I have two vacation homes. What did she mean? 00:26:19 Speaker 3: What what's Karen's like? 00:26:20 Speaker 2: It's I mean it's a gorgeous star. I think it's uh. I think she. 00:26:24 Speaker 3: Named her they got the money now, she went nice for you. The Sun it's one of the moons around Cet. I own the Sun. Yeah, not taken a star, but you can see it right there. No one fuck with me. I'll turn it off as soon as I want to. No, I think she named it or I can't remember. She named it Bridger A twelve and so really, I mean it was a I feel like there must be a million of these star businesses. 00:26:50 Speaker 2: Why don't I start one of these? 00:26:52 Speaker 3: It was I mean it was a whole first page of the Google searches. 00:26:55 Speaker 2: That's a great passive income. 00:26:57 Speaker 3: I think you should do name a star. But then it's like a pick. Sure of Bradley Cooper, but you could just name him whatever you want. 00:27:03 Speaker 2: To name them. Sorry, it's not your name anymore, Brad. That's a very smart idea. 00:27:10 Speaker 3: It's Chuck Mankowitz yuh. 00:27:14 Speaker 2: Own. 00:27:15 Speaker 3: He owns an HVAC heating repair out of Canton, Ohio. 00:27:18 Speaker 2: And renamed Jennifer Lopez Tyler. 00:27:22 Speaker 3: Sorry, I got the business is up. 00:27:24 Speaker 2: And running ten dollars. How could I say? 00:27:25 Speaker 1: No? 00:27:26 Speaker 3: A defamation? It's defamation on me. I got this copyright on this whole thing. 00:27:31 Speaker 2: Wow, that's a I mean that's a name. You've now got an agency and a new website. This has been a this is a money making podcast. 00:27:39 Speaker 3: I mean this is really this is the new Shark Tank here. 00:27:42 Speaker 2: This is essentially a financial show. 00:27:43 Speaker 3: I like this. 00:27:44 Speaker 2: Watch Shark Tank. 00:27:45 Speaker 3: These dip ideas. Sorry, I'm going back to that do I Every time I watch Shark Tank. They're just I just feel bad for the people that are so sincere and they're bad ideas, and then rich people are mean to them. I'm like, that's just the world. That's the world as it is. 00:28:00 Speaker 1: Is. 00:28:00 Speaker 3: Rich people are going to tell you how you're going to fail, and you'd be like, oh, thanks so much. 00:28:05 Speaker 2: It feels very dystopian. Yeah, it's like you've come before your overlords to beg. 00:28:10 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's just having a job with a boss and you need time off. Nope, but it's not good for the bottom line, all right. Bald guy and smarmy lady and the guy who owns sports I don't know who's on that show. 00:28:24 Speaker 2: It's made me cry before, really because I felt they were being well. I did have strep throat at the time, so it was weak already. But I thought they were going too mean to the people, and I started crying. 00:28:34 Speaker 3: Do you when when you know a producer is like telling them, like, you got to get destroy you guys, get meaner to these people because ratings dictate. We want to see that, we want it to be sinister. 00:28:48 Speaker 2: That absolutely happens there. 00:28:50 Speaker 3: But then there, I can't think of any ideas that are on there. I don't want to like have osmosis ideas or right. 00:28:57 Speaker 2: I mean, well, this is the thing. I just had a friend on it. Yeah, it was incredible. I felt starstruck by it. She was on there pitching did she got a deal? 00:29:06 Speaker 3: Really? 00:29:06 Speaker 2: She has. She runs this company fish wife. Have you heard of this? It's tin fish. 00:29:12 Speaker 3: I mean I've heard of tinned fish. It's a I mean, I mean cream and mushroom soup. By the can. You think I don't know what tin fish? 00:29:19 Speaker 2: You're like an alley cat. 00:29:22 Speaker 3: I go with more of a raccoon vibe myself. I need those imposable thumbs open all these can goods. 00:29:30 Speaker 2: But she was on there. She didn't embarrass herself. It wasn't like one of these things where she sings a song at the beginning of her She didn't rap or do anything. She just went on and presented the facts and walked away with the deal. I was shocked. 00:29:41 Speaker 3: Tin fish she reinvent howd she repitch? 00:29:44 Speaker 2: She's made it fancy, the oldest consumer food good. 00:29:49 Speaker 3: She's mad. 00:29:49 Speaker 2: She's made it fancy, like sourcing it from good places. And it does taste good. 00:29:55 Speaker 3: To come with a dip with a what tinned dip? 00:29:58 Speaker 2: Oh, tinned dip? That sounds interesting. 00:30:01 Speaker 3: Listen, do you have connections we should get on this show? We're the brightest stars available. How are we not on Shark Tank pitching tinned dip? Listen? These can goods They're good. Weren't so in California? Everybody's got an earthquake kit. You're looking at it boring beef jerky stuff I've seen before, freeze dried meals. I would love an option for some flavor to feel fancy in a crisis. 00:30:28 Speaker 2: That's such a good prying it open. Actually, just doing this reminds me that I can think of one tinned dip, and it's a tinned bean dip that you'll see gas stations. Have you ever seen this? 00:30:41 Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, I have seen that. Okay, this is my problem with shark tank. I invent something and then just I just have it in the cupboard. You mean bean dip? Yeah, I guess talking about the very beginning that you were like, like a white bean dip and I was like, that's exotic, Like, no, it's bean dip. It's a different color being, isn't. 00:31:01 Speaker 2: I mean bean dip. What we're currently talking about is a refried bean dip. It is. It comes in a can usually, but the little I'm thinking about, the little tiny ones are almost like a cat food can. 00:31:10 Speaker 3: That's that's the bean dip. That's the Friedo lay bean, the cheese dip usually in front of the other Freedo lay products. 00:31:17 Speaker 2: I love a frido as a dip. That's a chip scop. Yeah, they have to scuupables. 00:31:22 Speaker 3: The fact that they had to up it, like you know you could do this is I'm like, yeah, yeah, guys, we all know that. What do you think has been going on? I've just been putting I've been taking a handful of dip and put it in my mouth and then just eating Frito's. 00:31:35 Speaker 2: I know what to do with your chip? Wow, that's that's the real first pinkberry reinventing. I think we're all we already. 00:31:42 Speaker 3: Have savory pink berry. 00:31:44 Speaker 2: Oh interesting, Dropping free doo lays on a frozen yogurt doesn't sound. 00:31:49 Speaker 3: Because it's more just dips, all right? See now I just invented a. 00:31:53 Speaker 2: Talking about completely different neither. 00:31:56 Speaker 3: I said, no dips with the brightest star available bread. 00:32:01 Speaker 2: I can't believe we're now deep back. 00:32:03 Speaker 3: Into shark tank. Give us a million bucks. We already have it started. 00:32:07 Speaker 2: We'll figure it out after we have the money. 00:32:09 Speaker 3: Think how many dips you can get if that was the podcast? 00:32:12 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I would be surrounded by dip Would. 00:32:14 Speaker 3: You be offenditive? I just went off and did this because I mean, look at us. I feel like I'm going to eat more dips than you might. 00:32:22 Speaker 2: I love a dip. I'll out dip you. 00:32:25 Speaker 3: Now it's a challenge. 00:32:26 Speaker 2: Now it's a challenge podcasts uh where everyone ends up sick. 00:32:32 Speaker 3: Yeah, there's no Yeah, don't get the FDA involved with the dip making process. 00:32:37 Speaker 2: Here back to the star for a minute. Okay, what gave you this idea? 00:32:43 Speaker 3: I've always loved the uh arrogance of whoever thought like you see all that why don't we why don't we name them? And then this I just the concept of naming stars has always been silly to me, and I mean equal parts like romantic or thoughtful or absolute horseshit like like like so like a mix between those. And I thought that this one, this organization, not just because it was the second one that would load on my phone, but also because their whole spiel about like, well, the money you're paying is going to the search for another inhabitable planet. 00:33:24 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the whole thing you just read. 00:33:26 Speaker 3: Is like yeah, it's like this is going to research to find other earthlike planets. So like, not only are we like naming stuff that we shouldn't be naming, but we're probably ruining this something. Yeah, we are going to need another spot. So that kind of delight like blissful cluelessness got me excited about this particular organization that I use. 00:33:50 Speaker 2: That is the weird thing about space of like who owns the moon? This kind of thing. Eventually there's gonna be a fight over that. 00:33:57 Speaker 3: Wasn't there the idea of somebody's gonna do like drone advertising or moon was it on the moon? It was like something like like how they could do drone shows, but now it'll be advertisements, which I always thought just the airplane the banner, those were rude. 00:34:15 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's already invading my space and. 00:34:17 Speaker 3: You're just at the beach where you can't drink legally. It's like about a corona. Like that plane crashes, which I gotta stop saying stuff like that because then once in a while things happen. 00:34:27 Speaker 2: Yeah, one of these ad planes blows up. 00:34:30 Speaker 3: I feel terrible about this. 00:34:31 Speaker 2: Podcast kind of does bring these things to reality. Oh really, yeah, so just give me happen. It'll probably happen. 00:34:38 Speaker 3: I'm sorry. Before the banner pilots be safe out there, follow fa. 00:34:42 Speaker 2: Pro cost and peace to that pilot and guys went down the ad agencies that was paying for the banner and. 00:34:50 Speaker 3: Freedom's you know, you could use them to scoop and then it's just like tell my family I love them, and then you still see the banner. Last plane crashes, but you're like, ah, I. 00:35:02 Speaker 2: Could go for some much to sink into the sea. 00:35:04 Speaker 3: Yeah, this is tragic, most pretty hungry. 00:35:07 Speaker 2: Yeah, and then the I guess that's in the same category as the drawing things with the smoke. 00:35:14 Speaker 3: Which has that ever gone, well. 00:35:17 Speaker 2: I've never seen a successful one. I've always seen like two letters that I'm driving and I'm like, well, I wonder what that was. 00:35:22 Speaker 3: I don't think anybody has. I don't think anybody's had the patience. 00:35:26 Speaker 2: It takes a long time. 00:35:28 Speaker 3: Well, yeah, the stages of watching and are like, oh, it's a skywrider, and then you're watching and then you get the first letter, and then that goes away and you're like, well, wait, what was the was this part of the second letter or was that the first letter? You're like, I'm late for a thing. 00:35:44 Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean there's a good chance you missed four letters before the one you saw. Yeah, so it's just not worth investing your time in. 00:35:51 Speaker 3: Great idea, poor execution, horrible execution. And then there's a heart and then presumably a name, which at that point you're somebody's just making somebody else stand around like but wait when they're looking at their watch like skyriders great now, No, no, no, hold hold on, Gertrude, you need to I think it looks like a g to me, just boring your loved one. Yeah, just a long named loved one. It's contemplating leaving you in that moment because you just want to stand in a field for forty five minutes. 00:36:22 Speaker 2: How much does that cost? I wonder? 00:36:24 Speaker 3: I would hope a decent amount, but I feel like normal people do it, but it feels like to money. Well, money and good ideas aren't always in the same bed. 00:36:35 Speaker 2: That's true, that's true. But I feel like having a plane and go into the air at all must cost so much money at least you have any idea how much that costs? 00:36:45 Speaker 4: I mean base cost. It starts at thirty five dollars for a single writing. I don't know if that's just like better or if it's a word can get very pricey. 00:36:55 Speaker 3: It's like somebody saw how much money you can make being a good cake decorator, and like I'm going one up that. 00:37:01 Speaker 4: Okay, the thirty five for like a message, so I think it's like for the whole, like a normal message, twenty five it should. 00:37:10 Speaker 2: Be more like initial is like, oh, that's a lot of money. And now I'm thinking, actually. 00:37:15 Speaker 4: Someone's risking their life to write your stupid message in the sky. Like every time somebody gets into a plane, it's not a guarantee they're going to come back down. 00:37:22 Speaker 2: Right, especially one of these tiny ones. 00:37:24 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, and there those aren't the well up kept. 00:37:28 Speaker 2: They're not the bowings that are. 00:37:30 Speaker 3: That's that's a guy's plane. That's a guy like, Oh, I got I'll do I'll do one up on door dash. 00:37:35 Speaker 2: It's just me Rick, and I'll go get every stuff for you. 00:37:39 Speaker 3: I'll go get it. 00:37:41 Speaker 2: Opens the barn doors and. 00:37:42 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, what do you? Just give me a call, I'll get it. If the car starts, I'll get it. Like, that's who's doing the sky riding. 00:37:49 Speaker 2: Thirty five hundred dollars. I feel like that covers the gas. 00:37:53 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I don't, I know't how much flights cost just to sit in the plane. 00:37:57 Speaker 2: Right for a bad seat? Yeah, out like. 00:38:00 Speaker 3: Either skywriting should be more airline passenger line should be a lot cheaper. 00:38:05 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's probably both. 00:38:07 Speaker 3: Thirty five hundred bucks, right, I love you, but also, can you get me to Phoenix? 00:38:12 Speaker 2: Let me. 00:38:13 Speaker 3: I don't want to say kill two birds with one stone too close to what we're doing with the plane, but. 00:38:18 Speaker 2: I feel like a Phoenix trip to Phoenix from Los Angeles should be twenty five dollars. 00:38:21 Speaker 3: I feel like they should pay you for going to Phoenix personally. That's what I think. I think there should be an incentivized reason to go to Phoenix. 00:38:29 Speaker 2: I had a layover in Phoenix recently and I looked out. I obviously didn't visit the city or experience the culture or the people. He did. 00:38:37 Speaker 3: You went to the airport. 00:38:41 Speaker 2: I'm sure there's some good eggs in Phoenix. But when I looked at it, I was like, Wow, this is a fascinating environment. 00:38:46 Speaker 3: Yeah. What if we took all the stuff that people liked about Las Vegas and got rid of that but still lived here as an affront to God. 00:38:56 Speaker 2: Actually, what you're describing is something that appeals to me without casinos. 00:39:01 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just blisteringly hot. Uh, people convincing themselves it's the best. They have an ice skating rink there in the winter time, which the winner is still eighty degree outdoor I drink. 00:39:13 Speaker 2: Yeah, oh that's a waste, we waste. 00:39:16 Speaker 3: May as well just have a sky rider. Let you know where the outdoor ice skating rinked. It's because their environment that doesn't even exist out here. It's the desert. 00:39:24 Speaker 2: Wow, Phoenix, I'm not coming anytime. 00:39:27 Speaker 3: Yes, I go to Phoenix pretty often. Phoenix's they know what they know where. 00:39:32 Speaker 2: They're everybody's got there something, yeah, and everybody, well a lot of cities are bad. 00:39:36 Speaker 3: It's not my joke, and I wish I could remember who to give credit for. But the airport in Phoenix is called sky Harbor, and like, good job, that's just another name for airport. Like it's not even creative. You just look, it's the same thing that's their airport now, and it's like that kind of sums up Phoenix. Yeah, sky Harbor. 00:40:00 Speaker 2: All right, I mean it does. Wow, there's something very romantic about that until you break it down. 00:40:06 Speaker 3: Yeah, they didn't think about it. And I feel bad that I can't remember the comedian's name. Who did that? Oh, it's stuck. It stuck. 00:40:13 Speaker 2: The airport is basically on the same level as toilet. I feel like those words are very similar, Like they bring to my toilet. 00:40:20 Speaker 3: Oh really? Are you? Clearly not a fan of traveling. 00:40:24 Speaker 2: I do hate to be on a plane. I mean excruciating physically for me, is it? And I feel bad because I'm not a large person. I'm like, I don't I have leg room and everything, but it's horrible for. 00:40:35 Speaker 3: Me to bring it back around bisc off cookies. How do you feel about those? 00:40:39 Speaker 2: I like them? 00:40:40 Speaker 3: Does it I do very much? Now does that make the traveling a little bit better? No? 00:40:45 Speaker 2: Okay, because it is something where I'm like, well this is this is never a cook I would buy on my own, but I'm going to enjoy it. 00:40:52 Speaker 3: Here I've thought about I've enjoyed biscuit. Maybe it's like a you know, like a Stockholm Sea, like a prisoner scenario, like oh, you know, when you've been in the desert for a year, You're like, this is the best water I've ever had, Like this cookie is the greatest. I can't get it. 00:41:06 Speaker 2: They do surprise you. Yeah, it's like, oh, this is like the flavor in it is unlike any other thing you're eating. 00:41:12 Speaker 3: Ever, Yeah, I didn't expect to be treated this. Well, there's a fancy sweats or whatever they give you. 00:41:18 Speaker 2: The biscuss I mean that and ginger ale go hand in hand as far as like plain foods. Oh, okay, that I enjoy them on a plane, but nowhere else. Tomato juice, Oh that's interesting. I've never had a tomato juice in a plane, but it makes sense. 00:41:31 Speaker 3: Yeah, give me a tomato juice. I don't know why. I'm usually I usually now these days, and like a flight, I'm gonna be drunk, noise canceling headphones. 00:41:40 Speaker 2: Just passed out drunk. 00:41:41 Speaker 3: Joe Rogan can keep his deprivation tanks. I just need noise canceling headphones and a trip to few drinks. I'm somewhere else. 00:41:51 Speaker 2: Yeah, I like that cookie. That's usually what I pick over the pretzels at this point. Then I'll put it in my backpack sometimes for a special treat. 00:41:58 Speaker 3: Later, I might have him in back now every weekend, I've got all kinds of weird airplane snacks. 00:42:03 Speaker 2: Probably crushed a powder. 00:42:05 Speaker 3: Yeah, oh god, let me hang on to this pepper packet. You never know. I get an unseasoned meal while also having my travel gear with me. 00:42:13 Speaker 2: And those pepper packets do absolutely nothing to change the flavor of a food. No, No, I mean you need at least eight of those before it starts to be like, Oh, I have pepper on this. 00:42:21 Speaker 3: And I like that it's in the two tubes in the packet. 00:42:24 Speaker 2: Oh, you're thinking about the two tubes. I'm thinking about the more the straight up straight up. 00:42:28 Speaker 3: Here, like the actual fingernail amount of like magic dusting of it. 00:42:33 Speaker 2: The two tubes is crazy. 00:42:35 Speaker 3: That's like whoa, Hey, you don't want to go too crazy with all this pepper. We're going to give you the option to like slow it down a. 00:42:41 Speaker 2: Little bit and start with the one. Yeah, see how you feel. 00:42:44 Speaker 3: Don't overdo it. The chef took a lot of time if you had a restaurant with the two tube pepper packet. 00:42:52 Speaker 2: I think we should play a game. Okay, I feel like playing Gift or a curse. Let's play. You know, I was trying to be a professional for a while and play every other game twise, but or every other week a different game. But who cares? 00:43:04 Speaker 3: You know? 00:43:05 Speaker 2: New Year knew mey. I need a number between one and ten from you. 00:43:09 Speaker 3: Uh two? 00:43:10 Speaker 2: Okay, I have to do some light calculating to get our game pieces. So right now, you can promote, recommend, do whatever you want. 00:43:17 Speaker 3: Oh okay, I'll promote. Yeah, I guess I got a new special coming outs called dirt Knapp. That was the name of my cat, our cat, Missus A Nice Cat, comes out in early March, and I'd like to promote letting stray cats into your home or other animals. We did have raccoons come through the pet door at one point, and we got very lucky that they did not ravage our household. How many, Well, do I take it back? Had we had somebody else's cat come through the pet door and we had one. We had raccoons on the patio and one came through the pet door and our cat just stood like we had like a security camera but only pointing at the pet door. That's the only thing we were cared about. 00:43:59 Speaker 2: Small criminal. 00:44:00 Speaker 3: Yeah, and the cat in the background of the raccoon coming, any of the cats, like, I don't even know how to deal with this. 00:44:06 Speaker 2: One, and the cat left it alone. 00:44:09 Speaker 3: Yeah, Well that raccoons are monsters. 00:44:11 Speaker 2: They are built. 00:44:13 Speaker 3: Yeah, even the cat was like, I'm not I'm sorry, I appreciate the hospitality, let me in here, but this raccoon's gonna do with this raccoons? 00:44:20 Speaker 2: Was there anything you did to stop the raccoons in the future, No, just happen again. 00:44:27 Speaker 3: Kind of like looked at him disapprovingly when we see him on the pay You guys know the rules come on. 00:44:32 Speaker 2: That's terrifying to me. Yeah, well, people go watch Kyle's special. Of course, that was excellently You know you're promoted perfectly. Okay, what an uncomfortable thing to. 00:44:39 Speaker 3: Have to do. It doesn't feel good. 00:44:41 Speaker 2: I mean, it's never felt good for. Well, I bet there are some psychos that it feels good for. 00:44:45 Speaker 3: But yeah, and those that's a strange lot. Yeah, people that like themselves, These people that believe in themselves. 00:44:55 Speaker 2: What reality is that? This is how we play gift for a curse. I'm going to name three and you're gonna tell me if there are a gift or a curse and why, Okay, and then I'll tell you if you're right or wrong, because there are correct answers. 00:45:06 Speaker 3: Okay, fair enough, Okay. 00:45:07 Speaker 2: This first one is from a listener named Hannah. Hannah has suggested gift or a curse a ten percent discount. 00:45:16 Speaker 3: Ooh, I'm going to say I'm gonna say curse because ten percent is really not crazy, Like it doesn't make you feel like you're saving anything, and it doesn't lure me into like wanting to buy something. But then it's it's enough to make me like, if it's online, I hover over it and then like it might be in my cart and then like, oh, you left something in your cart. How about fifteen percent off, and I'm like, now we're talking, and that's how I wind up buying some crap I don't. 00:45:46 Speaker 2: Want absolutely, right, Okay, ten percent? What I mean it essentially doesn't exist as a discount. Don't bother. It's insulting. Yeah, it's like the smallest piece of cheese to lure me in. 00:45:58 Speaker 3: Stop blowing me a kiss. I know what we're at it. 00:46:00 Speaker 2: And by the time we get through shipping and taxes, it's been absolutely obliterated, and I'm paying full price. 00:46:06 Speaker 3: You've upped at ten percent to cover that for your little ten percent. I know your tricks to capitalism awful. 00:46:11 Speaker 2: I feel like fifteen percent even is pushing it. Twenty percent we're starting to talk reasonably. 00:46:18 Speaker 3: My problem is like, well, this thing's way over priced, but it's twenty five percent off twenty five It makes it just the price that you still wouldn't have paid if you like it costs as much. 00:46:28 Speaker 2: Right. 00:46:28 Speaker 3: But I then now I've fallen for the psychology of it. Right, I'm upset with myself. 00:46:33 Speaker 2: Twenty five percent will get me fifty percent, of course, we love. Yeah, do you get to seventy five percent you start worrying about the product. 00:46:42 Speaker 3: Yeah, this is like they're getting rid of stock. Yeah, somethings. Then like, but is it wrong for me? Right? 00:46:48 Speaker 2: And probably not. 00:46:49 Speaker 3: Sometimes a lot of people are wrong about something and it'll fit my needs just fine, make it right. Yeah for this, for this kind of savings, I'll figure it out. 00:47:00 Speaker 2: Okay, very well played. Next, this is from a listener named William Gift or a curse witnessing a. 00:47:05 Speaker 3: Murder witnessing a murder. Oh, if I'm gonna let's go dark with it, let's say Gift, only if it's not somebody you care about, and you can I mean milk it for like, I mean either like local news broadcasts like yeah I saw him, like you can have that notoriety, or you can like you can move into the podcast territory. Obviously it's very lucrative for a lot of people right now. But only if it's not like somebody who cared about, right, Like bad people get murdered. That's true, and you could be like, well, hey, hey about time. 00:47:54 Speaker 2: I saw must get murdered and we'd like you know. 00:47:59 Speaker 3: This guy, No, you're not. You're not cruising past my star anymore, buddy. Yeah, without naming on the dark side. And I'm gonna say it could be a blessing in a very odd way, like maybe you're a boring person, and then like you're the most boring person at the party, like this drips here again. Oh you think he's boring? Ask him by the time he saw that murder? 00:48:22 Speaker 2: Finally a story and. 00:48:23 Speaker 3: That's the reason you're getting invited to social gatherings. 00:48:27 Speaker 2: Yeah, everyone needs one event. 00:48:29 Speaker 3: Yeah, you gotta have something defining thing, even if you didn't create the definition. 00:48:32 Speaker 2: You know, right, but you're wrong? Curse? Oh okay, any time I think about witnessing any sort of crime or like seeing a car accident or a murder, I might immediately goes to paperwork and like, how much of my time is now being wasted by bureaucratic paperwork? 00:48:49 Speaker 3: Equally dark. Reason why it's a curse not because it could affect you emotionally? 00:48:53 Speaker 2: Can I? Can I appeal? Then? Can I? 00:48:55 Speaker 3: Because it could be a blessing because you could help solve the murder. 00:48:59 Speaker 2: Oh interesting, I'll put on your detective hats and get out. 00:49:02 Speaker 3: I'm going to help with justice. 00:49:04 Speaker 2: Right, magnifying glass, you're dusting for prints? 00:49:07 Speaker 3: Am I still wrong? 00:49:09 Speaker 2: You're still wrong? Okay, you're not going to argue a number three. This is from a listener named Liz Gift to a curse, venmoing someone money and captioning it, treat yourself to something nice today. 00:49:24 Speaker 3: I went dark on that last one, so I'm going to try and go blessing on this One's. 00:49:29 Speaker 2: A gift, gift to a curse. You can't it's not a blessing. 00:49:33 Speaker 3: Blessing. Yeah, I got confused on the game. 00:49:36 Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'm blessing. Not every blessings a gift? 00:49:41 Speaker 3: All right, man? You know Airport Sky Harbor. That's what we're arguing over here. Okay, I think it's well, it's literally a gift. Is this a question? 00:49:51 Speaker 2: Look the thing and now you have to deal with it. 00:49:55 Speaker 3: Okay, Well it's literally a gift. So it's a gift. 00:50:00 Speaker 2: Wrong curse? I mean, I mean, first of all, this has never happened to me, so I can't really speak to it. That's really the problem. 00:50:08 Speaker 3: It's not going to happen now with that attitude. 00:50:11 Speaker 2: It's a curse. I mean, who's doing this? 00:50:13 Speaker 3: Who? 00:50:13 Speaker 2: I've never had a thing that just says treat yourself to someone something nice today. There. 00:50:17 Speaker 3: It turns out there's some nice people out there. We don't know them. 00:50:21 Speaker 2: Introduce me. 00:50:21 Speaker 3: We're not going to meet them with the with the angle. We're taken now, Liz reach out. 00:50:26 Speaker 2: Yeah, apparently Liz is surrounded by people who are just filling her bank account. 00:50:30 Speaker 3: Kyle dash Canane on Venmo, it's a picture of me in front of Stonehenge. If because I'm supporting your thing, people reach out, worry about the special if you wanted to just venmo me and say, I wouldn't treat myself. I treat myself to some lovely dips and cookies. 00:50:47 Speaker 2: If somebody sent you four hundred dollars, what would you buy with it? 00:50:51 Speaker 3: Four hundred dollars interesting, it seems like a good amount of mone Oh yeah, I would freak out. I don't even know what to do with four hundred dollars. 00:50:59 Speaker 2: It would have ruined my life because I would then be like thinking for weeks. 00:51:02 Speaker 3: But okay, would it ruined your life because they said treat yourself to something nice if they just sent you four to dollars, like, all right, have a phone bill a couple of But when it's like no, you get yourself, Like when your grandmother gives you like no, no, you get something for you, right, you get it for you, and you're like, well, I didn't want this kind of pressure. 00:51:19 Speaker 2: I spin out. You spent out in a huge way. With gift cards with just money on them, They're I'm a mess. Oh they're worth more than cash to me. 00:51:26 Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's it's a cherish it mm hmm. Yeah. And then if I have to get all the amount, oh yeah, but I'd try to get it as close up. But you want to talk about buying stuff you don't need, Like, all right, I got eight dollars and fifty three cents. You know what, I think these bamboo chopsticks are what I would need for the house. I think it's set of eight. Eight pairs of bamboo chopsticks are exactly what I need for that house. 00:51:50 Speaker 2: I've carried around one of those things with forty cents on it before. I'm just talking, well, well it'll be a little. 00:51:54 Speaker 3: You know, off the p You wouldn't throw forty cents on the ground, No, I wouldn't. 00:51:58 Speaker 2: It's plastic. 00:51:59 Speaker 3: That's wasteful already, Right, I got to do it the right honor foreigner bucks. I think foreigner bucks as I'm sitting it right now, I think I get a good car wash, like a detailed car wash. 00:52:10 Speaker 2: Does that cost four hundred dollars a detailing? 00:52:13 Speaker 3: Yeah? But then you could tip them, oh what are they doing them, and say, hey, treat yourself to something nice. 00:52:21 Speaker 2: Pass it on like the Ring. 00:52:22 Speaker 3: Well that's the bad version. 00:52:24 Speaker 2: I think it's called pay it forward, like that movie Forward, a nice version of The Ring. 00:52:28 Speaker 3: Yeah, it wasn't that. The the kid from. 00:52:32 Speaker 2: It wasn't been a guest on this podcast before. Really, Yes, Hayley reach out. 00:52:36 Speaker 3: Yeah, pay it forward, buddy. Like there's like a SMR videos of people detailing cars where they get into like all the nooks and crannies with like little scrub rushing. 00:52:47 Speaker 2: Oh, I think I could get it. 00:52:48 Speaker 3: And they use the air the air canister that you use for your keyboard to like get all the little bits. So he basically like when you've gotten in a new car, that's what your car is like when it's done. Wow, car, it's a lot of work. 00:53:01 Speaker 2: Four hundred dollars. Do you know what? I may have said this on this podcast before, but the ASMR category I want is like when you go to like a national park or something where they give you a map at the beginning and then they get out a little marker or pen and like circle and like really right on it. There's something about that noise that like really clicks. 00:53:23 Speaker 3: For the felt the felt of the marker. 00:53:25 Speaker 2: Yeah, and like but another person giving you instructions while doing it, that should be a category. Really, I think it's an incredible noise. 00:53:33 Speaker 3: Is it just national parks? 00:53:35 Speaker 1: No? 00:53:35 Speaker 2: I think it's like museums. Where else does this sort of. 00:53:39 Speaker 3: Like an educational experience, kind of like something new and majestic. 00:53:43 Speaker 2: Front And I don't even think that. I think I just need to be pointed in a direction of something. 00:53:47 Speaker 3: Oh it's not even the mall. 00:53:49 Speaker 2: Oh okay, I mean they don't hand those out of them all, but they probably should. 00:53:52 Speaker 3: Like kind of like a very low level, uh domination fantasy. I think I don't know where I'm going. 00:54:01 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's deeply sexual, that's what it is. 00:54:02 Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't want to be whipped, but I love somebody telling me where to go. Gets out the highlight, right, Yeah, just mild bossyness, that's it. This is all happening in a dungeon. 00:54:11 Speaker 2: Yeah. 00:54:11 Speaker 3: I'm not gonna call you daddy, but somebody going what you're gonna want to do is like, oh boy, that. 00:54:16 Speaker 2: Really they've got that ranger suit on. 00:54:20 Speaker 3: From being a little kid. It's not a smr so much, but the smell of like air conditioned hotel air all like false air. Because I mean, being from the Midwest, if I go on vacation to Florida and you knew you were on vacation, heaven, yeah, because it went from so hot into illogically freezing, yes, and that I was like, this is the best it's ever going to get, and you like that. 00:54:41 Speaker 2: I think that does does get built into your brain as a sense memory of like this is now a good I know this is a good thing. 00:54:46 Speaker 3: Smell is the most yeaes. Smell is the strongest sense memory it is. 00:54:50 Speaker 2: Unfortunately for I wonder what second maybe sound? I mean I feel like visual doesn't really count. 00:54:57 Speaker 3: The visual is like everything all the time. Right, Maybe I think taste. 00:55:01 Speaker 2: Can probably taste interesting. 00:55:04 Speaker 3: We're coming back to that dip dip. 00:55:06 Speaker 2: We're getting back to Okay. 00:55:07 Speaker 3: I know in this day and age, I can't defend French dressing and cottage cheese. 00:55:12 Speaker 2: But if I ate it right now, someone make you eat a full cart. 00:55:16 Speaker 3: There's a six year old who doesn't know he's poor. 00:55:18 Speaker 2: That's what's going on. Oh maybe I'll give that a shot. At some times you don't have to. Really, I know you're not gonna like it. I just know I need. I need cottage cheese, plain. That's all. Maybe with a few And. 00:55:33 Speaker 3: That's the that's the most unappealing thing. That's like just just mortar with no bricks. 00:55:42 Speaker 2: What are we doing with this? 00:55:43 Speaker 3: This is this is an adhesive. Put some pineapple chunks in there. For Christ's sake. 00:55:48 Speaker 2: Every one of your ideas is from a cookbook from nineteen seventy. Okay, old mansion, what can I say? Okay, well, poorly played one out of three? 00:56:01 Speaker 3: All right, you know I agree to disagree. 00:56:05 Speaker 2: But you know everybody, you know, everybody struggles sometimes. 00:56:07 Speaker 3: Okay, well let's I mean, you know, look, I think I failed spectacularly. 00:56:13 Speaker 2: You did fail spectacular Okay. 00:56:14 Speaker 3: I think I stood up from my side. 00:56:16 Speaker 2: You had like a skyrider writing an F in the air for you, and I think that's nice. 00:56:21 Speaker 3: I hire a skyrider to break up with somebody to give to give bad news. 00:56:26 Speaker 2: That's not a bad idea. 00:56:28 Speaker 3: Hold on, wait for it, it's over. Yeah, no, no, he's finished in the art right now. 00:56:35 Speaker 2: Okay, we've got to answer a listener question. Okay, this is the final segment of the podcast. I said no emails. People write in to I said, no gifts at gmail dot com. They're, you know, kind of hanging by a thread. They're desperate and I help them. Will you help me with them? 00:56:49 Speaker 3: Okay? 00:56:50 Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, Uh. This says I. 00:56:52 Speaker 3: Don't fail again. 00:56:54 Speaker 2: You're gonna do. You're gonna do beautifully with this. I can tell already. Hello Bridger and Darling guest. I have a holiday related question, which I realize is probably moot, as Christmas itself is in eleven days. But here I am asking, well, Christmas is always around the corner, so this might help. It hangs over our heads always, Christmas is in our hearts. 00:57:12 Speaker 3: It's a burden. 00:57:15 Speaker 2: Every year, my large extended family has a white elephant exchange. In case you're unfamiliar, this is when each participant brings you an anonymous gift, and throughout the game, gifts can be stolen or traded or what have you. My family always has a kitchen or housewares theme and the limit is seventy five dollars. I find this game, extremely pointless and expensive. Last year, I got a very heavy mortar and pestle speaking of dips guacamole in one of those set from restoration hardware, with the fifty dollars price tags still intact. Tacky. I obviously plan to return it, but soon after the holidays last year, my local restoration hardware closed and it's been sitting in my basement ever since. My question is, can I bring the same completely pointless gift to this year's White Elephant Exchange. You have no idea who brought it last year, but they'll no doubt be in attendance. Well, they're divorces. This sort of thing could happen for next Christmas. We have a pretty big group. Will it be super obvious that I'm regifting the same present I received just one year before? I think I'm going to do it, and I'll report back. Yours, Shelby, Yours truly, Shelby. Okay, well, it sounds like Shelby already made up their minds. Yeah, which is a little unfair to make me read all of this. 00:58:27 Speaker 3: Some people want to be reinforced with the decision, the behavior. 00:58:31 Speaker 2: What do you think of this? 00:58:32 Speaker 3: I mean, well, you called out the tacking. Now seventy five dollars limit. 00:58:37 Speaker 2: For a white elephant. That's crazy to make. 00:58:40 Speaker 3: That's because it's like you're stealing like it should be like twenty bucks. 00:58:43 Speaker 2: You're kind of supposed to be bringing stupid garbage, aren't you. Yeah, not nice things from restoration hardware. That stresses me out. 00:58:50 Speaker 3: But it seems like somebody's in an income bracket that I don't too often, but I would say, just in an act of petty revenge as you rege if the mortar and pestle with twenty five dollars inside of it, because then whoever opens it, whoever gave it the last time, will know but won't admit. But you can then read the faces of the people and you get to look like a like a big old bitch while you do it. That's that's that'd be pretty fun. 00:59:18 Speaker 2: They're reminded of how cheap they were last year, looking around at everybody, and then that twenty five dollars can go towards whatever dip you're. 00:59:27 Speaker 3: Making in Oh, I mean, the finest squacamole that mortar and pestle not to divert It seems like a rough texture. It seems like tough to clean it? 00:59:36 Speaker 2: Does it seems impossible to clean? 00:59:38 Speaker 3: What a new? Yeah? Of course I'm going like ancient, like the ones that like as. 00:59:43 Speaker 2: Texts, right, I'm thinking of like that dark the gray, Yeah. 00:59:46 Speaker 3: Like volcanic rock. I'm sure this is like a marble, something smooth, something wipeable. 00:59:50 Speaker 2: Are they smooth? Can you get a smooth uh? 00:59:53 Speaker 3: One of these? I would think you'd have to, otherwise you're mashing stuff into the crevices. 01:00:01 Speaker 2: But they're crevices well the type of rock. Yeah, but I feel like I need some roughness in order to catch the ingredients or the medicine. 01:00:10 Speaker 3: Okay, okay, good point, But I I. 01:00:12 Speaker 2: Mean I never owned one myself, so I couldn't speak to it. 01:00:16 Speaker 3: You ever see them, like, I'll see them in somebody's house and be cool, Wow, they've really But you somebody had fifty dollars to spend, you know what after I get my car detailed, if there's fifty bucks left over? Mortal, Mortal and pedestal, that's I don't even know how to ask for them. 01:00:35 Speaker 2: And I feel like I can't even say them separately. I can't just know you'd get a mortar. 01:00:39 Speaker 3: I need, I need Mortal Pedestals? Do you get Mortimer Mortimer Mortial flower petals? 01:00:44 Speaker 2: Mortal Kombat? Do you guys have that Mortal Kombat bolt? 01:00:50 Speaker 1: Uh? 01:00:50 Speaker 2: Yeah. I feel like you're you're show boating if you buy one of these things, yeah, because everybody else just has like a potato masher in a plastic bowl. Oh yeah, do enough get a fork? Who cares? 01:01:02 Speaker 3: I look at it because I feel like it'd be satisfying to make something in there. 01:01:07 Speaker 2: It would be I mean, it would feel incredible that just pushing and yet and. 01:01:10 Speaker 3: You see like the videos when like when somebody's like and then we're gonna take the oh peppercorns and grind them ourselves. Like I would love to have the free time to grind my own pepper that way. But you do, and you you also have a great setup for your YouTube videos. 01:01:24 Speaker 2: I have time to watch the video that's a SMR. There must be a mortar and pestol a. 01:01:27 Speaker 3: Oh the cooking people, they're always like slapping the meat in front of the camera. Yeah, they're always like throwing it on the grill. But I think this it's a pretty I would have been psyched to get it as a gift. Oh yeah, because I wouldn't have gotten it for myself, right, But this person has not seen the Maybe this will show them the way that it's an exciting gift and. 01:01:51 Speaker 2: Maybe they need to speak up and say this, by the way, is not a white elephant party. We're just doing an expensive gift exchange. 01:01:58 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a Yeah. These are like well to do individuals. 01:02:01 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, they're just throwing the money around. 01:02:04 Speaker 3: Well maybe that was like the best okay, backtrack. What if somebody's like, seventy five bucks is too much, I'll go fifty And these these look like the kind of people that would appreciate them. 01:02:17 Speaker 2: Mortrom, you know with the pedestal, Yeah, it is a postal pestal? 01:02:25 Speaker 3: Do we do we know what it's called anymore? Without looking? 01:02:28 Speaker 2: Do you know what it's actually? Just looks Okay, I had to actually look at the word. The word actually looks like pest pestel. It looks like because it looks like a nestle with a P. 01:02:38 Speaker 3: Do they know what it is? 01:02:39 Speaker 2: I don't think anyone has ever known. 01:02:41 Speaker 3: They're getting rid of it. They don't even want it. 01:02:43 Speaker 2: Simply, no one can picture this idol or it's unpronounceable. 01:02:47 Speaker 3: The old timey bowl and stabby, you know, the club you club the grains into the bowl. 01:02:53 Speaker 2: I'm not questioning whether that's even the correct spelling, because I would. 01:02:56 Speaker 3: I mean, like, I mean, there's no way to check into it. 01:03:00 Speaker 2: I was p E S t A L. But that's obviously that can't be. It's b E S T L E. And it's mortar, right, and mortar which mortar makes no sense because I feel like mortar isn't mortar? Also like a thing in war that's weaponry, Yeah, like a very horrible wartime. 01:03:20 Speaker 3: Yeah, there's a shoot also. Now I'm going to a place. Now, imagine you break one of these items. You can't just go get the other individually. 01:03:28 Speaker 2: Oh interesting, Now it's worthless and. 01:03:30 Speaker 3: You're just on eBay hoping somebody broke the item that you're looking for the other one that you're not looking for, you can just trade it off. 01:03:38 Speaker 2: Yeah. If you break the pestle, the mortar becomes a bowl. Yeah, if you break the poor mortar, the pestle becomes a weapon. 01:03:44 Speaker 3: That's true. Yeah, it's just one little rock club and a nice ash tray. 01:03:49 Speaker 2: That's a lot of ash. You can make a real smoking problem if you have cigars, you know, flowing with ash I got empty. Then it's been there for forty years. 01:04:01 Speaker 3: I'm gonna make some with it. Clean my jewelr I clean my silver in that. 01:04:04 Speaker 2: Now, Well we answered Shelby's question more than perfectly, did we? I feel like at some point we were talking about her question. 01:04:13 Speaker 3: Well, I thought you could be like snobby and send it back with a twenty five bucks. But now if it's somebody attending that doesn't even have send me five bucks. But they thought I got a nice gift for fifty bucks. And Shelby's poo pooing it. Their name is Shelby. That sounds like somebody who thinks they're too good for this item. 01:04:28 Speaker 2: Shelby's going to be ejected from this family one way or the other. 01:04:31 Speaker 3: Or stuck making table side guac for the holidays. And now we're back to the Dips. 01:04:37 Speaker 1: This is really all. 01:04:37 Speaker 3: It comes back a real boa on this thing. 01:04:40 Speaker 2: The Dips. This is all started by Jen Chuck. Jen Chuck's birthday this weekend and there yeah Dip obsessed and now they've got a DIP episode to talk about. Happy birthday, Jen. My god, Kyle, I've got I'm now the owner of two stars. I'm to become a little bit of a real estate buff who knows what's next for me. No one can say three stars. Three stars sounds like we're reviewing. 01:05:08 Speaker 3: Good for intergalactic real estate, not good for a Yelp review. 01:05:11 Speaker 2: It's a warning sign. Yeah, truly. If it's below five stars at this point, it's like or something. I've had such a nice time with you here today. 01:05:22 Speaker 3: I've had a blast. 01:05:24 Speaker 2: Thank you for being here, thank you for having me listener, thank you for being wherever you are. The podcast is over, Get out of here. I love you, goodbye. I said, No Gifts is an exactly right production. It's produced by our dear friend Analise Nilson, and it's beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. And we couldn't do it without our guest booker, Patrick Kottner. The theme song, of course, could only come from miracle worker Amy Man. You must follow the show on Instagram. At I said no Gifts, I don't want to hear any excuses. That's where you get to see pictures of all these gorgeous gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see pictures of the gifts? 01:06:07 Speaker 1: And I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guess to my home, you gotta come to me empty, And I said, no guests. Your presences presents enough that I already had too much stuff. So how did you dare to surbey me?