1 00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:11,680 Speaker 1: Family Secrets is a production of I Heart Radio. I'm 2 00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:15,880 Speaker 1: Danny Shapiro, and this is family Secrets, the secrets that 3 00:00:15,920 --> 00:00:18,759 Speaker 1: are kept from us, the secrets we keep from others, 4 00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:23,200 Speaker 1: and the secrets we keep from ourselves. I've heard from 5 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:27,000 Speaker 1: so many about your own family secrets and realize that 6 00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:29,640 Speaker 1: what we are creating for each other on this podcast 7 00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:33,040 Speaker 1: is a community, a community for those who are looking 8 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:37,199 Speaker 1: for a safe and supportive space to unburden themselves. To 9 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:40,040 Speaker 1: that end, we've created a number for listeners to call 10 00:00:40,159 --> 00:00:44,080 Speaker 1: in to record stories to share here in this space. 11 00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:47,320 Speaker 1: This week, I'd like to share a few of those 12 00:00:47,320 --> 00:00:54,560 Speaker 1: stories from our community. Thanks for listening. Hi there, Um 13 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:57,720 Speaker 1: I'd like to share my secret. I found out last year, 14 00:00:57,920 --> 00:01:00,640 Speaker 1: when I was fifty two, that my biological father was 15 00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:03,440 Speaker 1: not who I thought it was. My mom had always 16 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:08,640 Speaker 1: told me that her first husband was my sister's dad, 17 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:12,480 Speaker 1: and then my father also, and when she was pregnant 18 00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:15,200 Speaker 1: with me, he passed away at the age of six. 19 00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:18,919 Speaker 1: Then she married her second husband and they had my brother, 20 00:01:19,760 --> 00:01:22,720 Speaker 1: and they then went on to get divorced. When I 21 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:26,120 Speaker 1: was in high school, her second husband started saying that 22 00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:29,360 Speaker 1: he was my biological father. Um. It made a lot 23 00:01:29,360 --> 00:01:32,280 Speaker 1: of sense to me because I physically resembled him more, 24 00:01:32,319 --> 00:01:35,160 Speaker 1: I did not look like who she said my father 25 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:37,880 Speaker 1: was UM, and when I questioned her, she said that 26 00:01:37,959 --> 00:01:41,880 Speaker 1: that's this was not accurate. So I kind of dropped 27 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:44,800 Speaker 1: it and just went on with life and death. Forward 28 00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:48,760 Speaker 1: to gosh, when I was in mid thirties, me and 29 00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:52,680 Speaker 1: her second husband, my stepdad, talked about it more. He 30 00:01:52,760 --> 00:01:55,360 Speaker 1: really felt like he was my biological father. So we 31 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:58,160 Speaker 1: did a DNA test and it was negative, which was 32 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:01,280 Speaker 1: really surprising and kind of appointing. I think I really 33 00:02:01,280 --> 00:02:06,160 Speaker 1: wanted him to be my father biologically. So then you know, 34 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:10,079 Speaker 1: time went on. I had children, and two years ago 35 00:02:10,200 --> 00:02:13,760 Speaker 1: my oldest child decided to get his DNA tested and 36 00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 1: it came back that he was thirty percent Irish. UM 37 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:21,079 Speaker 1: just kind of made all of us shrugger eyebrows, like, okay, 38 00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:24,160 Speaker 1: where did that come from? None on my side, supposedly, 39 00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:27,360 Speaker 1: and none on my husband's side. So I did mine 40 00:02:27,720 --> 00:02:31,200 Speaker 1: UM last year and sure enough, it came back that 41 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:34,160 Speaker 1: I was half Irish. At that time, I had about 42 00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:36,760 Speaker 1: six second cousins pop up on the twenty three and 43 00:02:36,840 --> 00:02:39,880 Speaker 1: me About a month later, I got a message from 44 00:02:39,880 --> 00:02:43,840 Speaker 1: a lady who said that she was my aunt. UM. 45 00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:47,360 Speaker 1: I reached out to her. Long story short, she and 46 00:02:47,440 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 1: my mom, who was since deceased, had been best friends 47 00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:54,320 Speaker 1: in high school and college, and we're actually in each 48 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:58,959 Speaker 1: other's weddings. UM. She had two brothers, and we we 49 00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:03,799 Speaker 1: concluded that older brother Tom was my biological father. They 50 00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:08,079 Speaker 1: are Irish, and unfortunately I won't be able to ever 51 00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:11,440 Speaker 1: meet him, but I do have my aunt, a cousin, 52 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:18,960 Speaker 1: and two more half siblings that I'm excited to meet. Hi. 53 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:21,320 Speaker 1: I just want to thank you for the podcast. UM. 54 00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:23,639 Speaker 1: Listening to your podcast is giving me the courage to 55 00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:26,920 Speaker 1: pick up and tell my secret. UM. Yesterday I told 56 00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:29,880 Speaker 1: my teenage children about my childhood, how I was sexually 57 00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:33,960 Speaker 1: abused for eleven years, and how when I was eleven 58 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:36,520 Speaker 1: I told my secret and by the time I was twelve, 59 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:40,200 Speaker 1: I would be able to testify in court against my abuser. UM. 60 00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:42,200 Speaker 1: I had not had the courage to tell my children. 61 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:44,760 Speaker 1: I didn't know how I would tell them. Yesterday, I 62 00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:47,320 Speaker 1: did it, and they were so understanding and said they 63 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:50,160 Speaker 1: actually kind of knew something had happened to me. And 64 00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:53,000 Speaker 1: it just felt so good and I feel so free 65 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 1: telling my children my past and it is no longer 66 00:03:57,280 --> 00:04:04,280 Speaker 1: a family secret, so thank you. Hi there. Uh So, 67 00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:07,240 Speaker 1: a few weeks ago, my husband gelt phone calls that 68 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:10,360 Speaker 1: we needed to head back to New York because my 69 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:14,240 Speaker 1: husband's grandmother was ill and that she didn't have much fight. 70 00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:17,720 Speaker 1: So we went back to New York. She stayed with 71 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:22,040 Speaker 1: some family and uh, while we were visiting, we ended 72 00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:25,400 Speaker 1: up having to take his grandmother to the hospital, UM 73 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:29,640 Speaker 1: the emergency room to care for while she was there. Amazingly, 74 00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:32,440 Speaker 1: during all of this COVID stuff, she was allowed to 75 00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:36,480 Speaker 1: have visitors in her room. I was the first on 76 00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:40,240 Speaker 1: her list. Uh. During this four hours that I got 77 00:04:40,279 --> 00:04:44,400 Speaker 1: to done with her, she told me of her first 78 00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:47,840 Speaker 1: child that she had when she was fourteen. She had 79 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:54,080 Speaker 1: been living in Brooklyn and her family made her um 80 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:55,880 Speaker 1: moved out of the house, so she was living with 81 00:04:56,000 --> 00:05:00,160 Speaker 1: her sister and shortly after having a baby, she it's 82 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:04,320 Speaker 1: gone out for a walk and the baby had actually 83 00:05:04,320 --> 00:05:09,000 Speaker 1: been restaurant over in a carriage. Thankfully, the baby survived, 84 00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:12,440 Speaker 1: but she realized that at that point, given her life situation, 85 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:15,480 Speaker 1: that she she gived the baby up for adoptions, and 86 00:05:15,520 --> 00:05:18,920 Speaker 1: that's what she did. When she got older, she told 87 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:21,960 Speaker 1: her husband about it, and she told her children, and 88 00:05:22,040 --> 00:05:26,120 Speaker 1: everyone treated it as she had done something wrong, so 89 00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 1: she more or less like even though she told them, 90 00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:32,560 Speaker 1: she kept a lot of promotions about it to herself. 91 00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:37,080 Speaker 1: And it's really something that unless she had told me, 92 00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:41,080 Speaker 1: it's really not talked about with the family. So I 93 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,160 Speaker 1: kind of feel I now have this like mission. So 94 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:47,480 Speaker 1: she told me her story while she was on her 95 00:05:47,560 --> 00:05:50,799 Speaker 1: death sad like, I now have this mission I feel 96 00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:53,440 Speaker 1: to find out who this person says to this person 97 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:57,120 Speaker 1: that I have been, and just try and connect that 98 00:05:57,200 --> 00:06:00,880 Speaker 1: family to the family that they don't realize that they have. 99 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:16,000 Speaker 1: If you'd like to share your story, call one eight 100 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:20,840 Speaker 1: eight eight Secret zero and record your story. We won't 101 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:22,599 Speaker 1: be able to run all the stories, but we do 102 00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:24,680 Speaker 1: want to shine a light on as many as we can. 103 00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:29,400 Speaker 1: The number again is one eight eight Secret and then 104 00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:46,640 Speaker 1: the numeral zero. For more podcasts for my Heart Radio, 105 00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:49,680 Speaker 1: visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever 106 00:06:49,839 --> 00:06:51,279 Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows.