1 00:00:15,436 --> 00:00:31,236 Speaker 1: Pushkin pick up location, SF picked up time twelve thirty. 2 00:00:32,636 --> 00:00:35,236 Speaker 1: If there's one car you absolutely have to rent when 3 00:00:35,276 --> 00:00:38,236 Speaker 1: you go to San Francisco, it has to be compact, 4 00:00:38,356 --> 00:00:41,756 Speaker 1: two four door forward focus or similar. I'm not really 5 00:00:41,796 --> 00:00:48,196 Speaker 1: a car person. Automatic transmission, Yes, air con Yes. My 6 00:00:48,316 --> 00:00:51,596 Speaker 1: regular ride is a slightly scruffy twenty eleven Nissan CenTra 7 00:00:51,836 --> 00:00:55,756 Speaker 1: dual air back awesome. If you can't picture that in 8 00:00:55,796 --> 00:00:59,596 Speaker 1: your head, that's okay. I'm not sure anyone can. It's 9 00:00:59,716 --> 00:01:03,196 Speaker 1: kind of a dull silver color and relatively anonymous, lost 10 00:01:03,276 --> 00:01:10,516 Speaker 1: damage weaver. No child seat. Now, when I travel for work, 11 00:01:10,716 --> 00:01:13,916 Speaker 1: I usually rent the cheapest, boxiest and most ordinary car 12 00:01:13,956 --> 00:01:21,716 Speaker 1: on the lot, prepaid guess, no confirm rental done. But 13 00:01:21,796 --> 00:01:23,636 Speaker 1: when my producer Ryan and I arrived at the San 14 00:01:23,636 --> 00:01:26,356 Speaker 1: Francisco airport last fall, we were in for a bit 15 00:01:26,396 --> 00:01:29,076 Speaker 1: of a surprise. The woman at the car rental place 16 00:01:29,116 --> 00:01:33,076 Speaker 1: apologized profusely they'd run out of normal, boxy compact cars 17 00:01:33,516 --> 00:01:37,436 Speaker 1: and intermediates and full sizes. Would it be okay, she 18 00:01:37,516 --> 00:01:40,236 Speaker 1: asked if instead of the car I booked, we accepted 19 00:01:40,276 --> 00:01:55,596 Speaker 1: at no extra cost, a bright red Mustang convertible. We 20 00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:58,596 Speaker 1: in our amazing car took San Francisco by storm. We 21 00:01:58,716 --> 00:02:01,716 Speaker 1: crossed and recrossed the Golden Gate Bridge and soaked up 22 00:02:01,836 --> 00:02:05,876 Speaker 1: envious glances from teenage boys at crosswalks, and blasted eighties 23 00:02:05,916 --> 00:02:09,756 Speaker 1: cent pop on repeat the entire time. Instead of adult 24 00:02:09,756 --> 00:02:12,116 Speaker 1: trip into the city for work, Ryan and I had 25 00:02:12,156 --> 00:02:15,796 Speaker 1: the time of our lives, laughing like idiots and making memories, 26 00:02:16,276 --> 00:02:21,036 Speaker 1: all because of the car. That Mustang experience got Ryan 27 00:02:21,076 --> 00:02:25,036 Speaker 1: thinking he's always kind of hated my CenTra. He wants 28 00:02:25,036 --> 00:02:28,196 Speaker 1: me to get a newer, safer car, especially since my 29 00:02:28,276 --> 00:02:31,796 Speaker 1: Nisan does have a few body work issues. I kind 30 00:02:31,796 --> 00:02:34,956 Speaker 1: of hit a huge rock, so Ryan started texting to 31 00:02:34,996 --> 00:02:39,356 Speaker 1: make his case. Get a Mustang, Get a Mustang, Get 32 00:02:39,516 --> 00:02:45,596 Speaker 1: a Mustang. This carried on and on and on. One 33 00:02:45,636 --> 00:02:50,396 Speaker 1: text contained a single word, all caps with an exclamation point, Mustang. 34 00:02:51,476 --> 00:02:53,956 Speaker 1: I know Ryan only wants what's best for me, but 35 00:02:54,036 --> 00:02:56,796 Speaker 1: I have a mostly working car now, and the science 36 00:02:56,796 --> 00:02:59,396 Speaker 1: suggests that giving in and buying a newer, more expensive 37 00:02:59,436 --> 00:03:02,076 Speaker 1: vehicle would have a surprising effect on my well being. 38 00:03:02,676 --> 00:03:09,196 Speaker 1: It might hurt my happiness rather than help it. Our 39 00:03:09,196 --> 00:03:11,396 Speaker 1: minds are constantly telling us what to do to be happy, 40 00:03:11,796 --> 00:03:13,996 Speaker 1: But what if our minds are wrong. What if our 41 00:03:14,036 --> 00:03:16,556 Speaker 1: minds are lying to us, leading us away from what 42 00:03:16,596 --> 00:03:19,316 Speaker 1: will really make us happy. The good news is that 43 00:03:19,436 --> 00:03:21,636 Speaker 1: understanding the science of the mind can point us all 44 00:03:21,676 --> 00:03:24,916 Speaker 1: back in the right direction. You're listening to the Happiness Lab. 45 00:03:25,036 --> 00:03:37,036 Speaker 1: Is doctor Laurie Santos. I've had a lifelong fascination with 46 00:03:37,116 --> 00:03:39,236 Speaker 1: the supernatural. I wrote a book about that when my 47 00:03:39,276 --> 00:03:42,236 Speaker 1: first book was about why we Believe in the supernatural. 48 00:03:42,596 --> 00:03:45,156 Speaker 1: This is Bruce Hood, a professor of psychology at the 49 00:03:45,236 --> 00:03:48,676 Speaker 1: University of Bristol in the UK. Like me, Bruce is 50 00:03:48,676 --> 00:03:51,436 Speaker 1: intrigued by some of the weirder, more irrational parts of 51 00:03:51,476 --> 00:03:54,316 Speaker 1: the human mind. But I didn't realize how personal that 52 00:03:54,356 --> 00:03:57,316 Speaker 1: interest was until I visited his house for the first time. 53 00:03:58,316 --> 00:04:01,236 Speaker 1: You see, Bruce lives in a lovely converted barn in 54 00:04:01,276 --> 00:04:04,676 Speaker 1: a quaint, quiet part of the English countryside, and so 55 00:04:04,876 --> 00:04:07,116 Speaker 1: I was expecting the inside of his house to look 56 00:04:07,396 --> 00:04:13,716 Speaker 1: rather cozy. But that wasn't what I saw when I 57 00:04:13,756 --> 00:04:23,636 Speaker 1: first opened the door. Everywhere I looked there was blood, 58 00:04:23,996 --> 00:04:29,356 Speaker 1: claws and fangs, which is just the way Bruce likes it. 59 00:04:30,156 --> 00:04:33,396 Speaker 1: I've loved horror movies and the sort of genre from 60 00:04:33,436 --> 00:04:37,156 Speaker 1: a very early age. I became obsessional about buying vintage 61 00:04:37,196 --> 00:04:40,756 Speaker 1: movie posters with werewolves and vampires and all that sort 62 00:04:40,796 --> 00:04:43,516 Speaker 1: of thing. Bruce was able to actualize his childhood horror 63 00:04:43,516 --> 00:04:47,556 Speaker 1: obsession once he finally got a professor level salary. That 64 00:04:47,716 --> 00:04:51,236 Speaker 1: was when he discovered the miracle of online auctions. I 65 00:04:51,316 --> 00:04:53,836 Speaker 1: have over a hundred posters now, and there's no way. 66 00:04:54,036 --> 00:04:55,876 Speaker 1: I don't think anyone's going a house small, not unless 67 00:04:55,876 --> 00:04:57,956 Speaker 1: you're very wealthy. I've got a house so you can 68 00:04:57,996 --> 00:04:59,556 Speaker 1: easily accommodate them all. So a lot of them. I 69 00:04:59,556 --> 00:05:01,076 Speaker 1: am afraid to just store it away. But I have 70 00:05:01,196 --> 00:05:03,516 Speaker 1: framed most of them as many as I can, and 71 00:05:03,556 --> 00:05:05,796 Speaker 1: they're all over the walls. You've over a hundred of these, 72 00:05:05,836 --> 00:05:08,196 Speaker 1: I have over a hundred. Yeah, and they're like, you know, 73 00:05:08,316 --> 00:05:11,116 Speaker 1: meter by is bag. So they're not little things. They're 74 00:05:11,116 --> 00:05:14,876 Speaker 1: big posters. Why would anyone buy more movie posters than 75 00:05:14,916 --> 00:05:18,716 Speaker 1: they could possibly display? Bruce realized that it wasn't really 76 00:05:18,716 --> 00:05:21,676 Speaker 1: the posters he loved so much, it was the pursuit. 77 00:05:21,916 --> 00:05:24,876 Speaker 1: I would search on eBay and you can see the 78 00:05:24,876 --> 00:05:26,996 Speaker 1: bidding line, and you can offer a bid, and then 79 00:05:26,996 --> 00:05:29,156 Speaker 1: you see someone's outbid you, and then you get frustrated. 80 00:05:29,236 --> 00:05:30,956 Speaker 1: He's like, I really buzzed, and the thrill of I'd 81 00:05:30,956 --> 00:05:33,916 Speaker 1: got it in a complete desperation and disappointment of I'd 82 00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:35,836 Speaker 1: lost out to some other guy. And of course the 83 00:05:35,956 --> 00:05:38,476 Speaker 1: post would turn up weeks later, and it was great 84 00:05:38,516 --> 00:05:41,556 Speaker 1: getting them, but nothing compared to the kind of exhilaration 85 00:05:41,636 --> 00:05:44,396 Speaker 1: of winning. The auction that thrill we get from buying 86 00:05:44,396 --> 00:05:47,036 Speaker 1: a new prize on eBay is well understood by science. 87 00:05:47,596 --> 00:05:51,516 Speaker 1: It's caused by a neurotransmitter called dopamine. Whenever we buy 88 00:05:51,556 --> 00:05:54,396 Speaker 1: something exciting, the reward areas of our brain release a 89 00:05:54,396 --> 00:05:57,796 Speaker 1: bunch of dopamine, which not only triggers a pleasurable sensation, 90 00:05:58,356 --> 00:06:01,116 Speaker 1: but also makes it more likely that we'll repeat the behavior. 91 00:06:01,916 --> 00:06:05,036 Speaker 1: Evolutionarily speaking, dopamine is there to ensure that we keep 92 00:06:05,036 --> 00:06:08,036 Speaker 1: doing all the important things like eating and having sex. 93 00:06:08,756 --> 00:06:11,716 Speaker 1: But now nowadays dopamine can just as easily make us 94 00:06:11,796 --> 00:06:15,036 Speaker 1: chase after things that we don't really need for our survival, like, 95 00:06:15,156 --> 00:06:18,756 Speaker 1: for example, more vintage horror movie posters than can actually 96 00:06:18,836 --> 00:06:22,836 Speaker 1: fit your house. Of course, Bruce understands the science of dopamine. 97 00:06:23,156 --> 00:06:25,116 Speaker 1: Knowledge is not enough. You can know these things very 98 00:06:25,116 --> 00:06:27,396 Speaker 1: objectively and yet still be a victim to the same 99 00:06:27,436 --> 00:06:30,196 Speaker 1: sort of mechanisms, so at least I kind of understood 100 00:06:30,196 --> 00:06:31,796 Speaker 1: what was driving it. But I got to a point 101 00:06:31,796 --> 00:06:34,356 Speaker 1: where I literally could not buy or put up anymore. 102 00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:37,476 Speaker 1: And after that I kind of started to realize, well, 103 00:06:37,476 --> 00:06:42,076 Speaker 1: this overconsumption thing, this possession thing, is really interesting. Bruce 104 00:06:42,116 --> 00:06:44,156 Speaker 1: began to study the science of why we like to 105 00:06:44,196 --> 00:06:47,916 Speaker 1: accumulate so much stuff. This research became the basis of 106 00:06:47,916 --> 00:06:51,036 Speaker 1: his recent book Possessed. Why we want more than we 107 00:06:51,076 --> 00:06:53,756 Speaker 1: need We buy for a number of reasons. There's a 108 00:06:53,796 --> 00:06:57,556 Speaker 1: whole area of evolutionary theory called signaling. The poster child 109 00:06:57,556 --> 00:06:59,676 Speaker 1: for signaling, of course, is the peacock. Why does it 110 00:06:59,716 --> 00:07:01,676 Speaker 1: have such a silly tail? It costs so much in 111 00:07:01,756 --> 00:07:04,716 Speaker 1: terms of energy, it's not very efficient, it makes them 112 00:07:04,756 --> 00:07:08,156 Speaker 1: very vulnerable to attack, and yet these animals have evolved 113 00:07:08,196 --> 00:07:11,636 Speaker 1: this elaborate because it signals to potential mates that they 114 00:07:11,676 --> 00:07:14,916 Speaker 1: have good genes. So rather than fighting or learning to 115 00:07:14,996 --> 00:07:18,836 Speaker 1: run away or whatever, they've developed these signing behaviors, like 116 00:07:18,956 --> 00:07:22,396 Speaker 1: peacocks strutting their stuff. We humans are naturally drawn to 117 00:07:22,476 --> 00:07:26,356 Speaker 1: shiny cars, fancy clothes, and other status symbols. These things 118 00:07:26,396 --> 00:07:29,156 Speaker 1: act as outward signs how awesome we are on the inside. 119 00:07:29,796 --> 00:07:33,316 Speaker 1: And so our species really likes to accumulate stuff so 120 00:07:33,396 --> 00:07:35,876 Speaker 1: much so that we've gone beyond just filling our shelves 121 00:07:35,916 --> 00:07:39,996 Speaker 1: and closets and attics and garages. We've fueled a whole 122 00:07:40,036 --> 00:07:43,716 Speaker 1: new growth industry self storage rentals. I mean, there are 123 00:07:43,756 --> 00:07:48,156 Speaker 1: more storage units than the McDonald's. It's just ridiculously a 124 00:07:48,276 --> 00:07:52,236 Speaker 1: symptom of a culture which has become obsessed with possessions. 125 00:07:52,436 --> 00:07:54,396 Speaker 1: So that's why I called the book Possessed, because it's 126 00:07:54,436 --> 00:07:57,476 Speaker 1: like this demon, is this little inp in our mind 127 00:07:57,516 --> 00:07:59,676 Speaker 1: telling us to buy things and don't throw it away 128 00:07:59,676 --> 00:08:02,076 Speaker 1: because it might be valuable one day. But is all 129 00:08:02,076 --> 00:08:05,116 Speaker 1: this purchasing really making us happier at least beyond the 130 00:08:05,156 --> 00:08:08,516 Speaker 1: initial pursuit. I mean, it doesn't really seem like it, 131 00:08:09,156 --> 00:08:12,316 Speaker 1: which poses a bit of a paradox, since many scholars 132 00:08:12,316 --> 00:08:15,996 Speaker 1: initially assumed that increased material wealth would lead to happiness. 133 00:08:16,556 --> 00:08:19,436 Speaker 1: The Eeselin paradox was identified by Richard Estlin back in 134 00:08:19,436 --> 00:08:21,716 Speaker 1: the early seventies, and he noted that if you look 135 00:08:21,716 --> 00:08:25,276 Speaker 1: at the gross national product of the US, in particular, 136 00:08:25,516 --> 00:08:27,876 Speaker 1: as it's been rising, it doesn't seem to have a 137 00:08:27,876 --> 00:08:30,596 Speaker 1: corresponding change and increased happiness, and said, he said, that's 138 00:08:30,596 --> 00:08:33,276 Speaker 1: the paradox. We should be happier. You may have heard 139 00:08:33,276 --> 00:08:36,476 Speaker 1: the term retail therapy, and there's a sort of bit 140 00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:39,236 Speaker 1: of truth in that people do enjoy the process of shopping. 141 00:08:39,316 --> 00:08:41,956 Speaker 1: But just like me and my poster is that initial 142 00:08:41,996 --> 00:08:44,276 Speaker 1: buzz I get from doing it doesn't last very long. 143 00:08:44,676 --> 00:08:47,396 Speaker 1: When the buzz of buying wears off. When that dobamine 144 00:08:47,436 --> 00:08:50,636 Speaker 1: rush in our brain subsides, those new possessions can make 145 00:08:50,676 --> 00:08:54,476 Speaker 1: us feel even sadder than we did before. The trouble is, 146 00:08:54,556 --> 00:08:57,836 Speaker 1: as soon as you get something with outstanding quality, it 147 00:08:57,876 --> 00:09:00,796 Speaker 1: makes all your other possessions look pretty rubbish. So this 148 00:09:00,836 --> 00:09:02,916 Speaker 1: is called the deter Or effect. After the French philosopher, 149 00:09:03,036 --> 00:09:06,036 Speaker 1: he really wanted an addressing gown, and he spent a 150 00:09:06,036 --> 00:09:08,156 Speaker 1: lot of money on it, and he really commented it, 151 00:09:08,156 --> 00:09:09,676 Speaker 1: and he got it and he loved and he looked 152 00:09:09,676 --> 00:09:12,036 Speaker 1: around everything else looked a bit shabby. So then he 153 00:09:12,076 --> 00:09:13,876 Speaker 1: realized he had to go and change everything else in 154 00:09:13,916 --> 00:09:16,636 Speaker 1: this household. And he started to spend more money than 155 00:09:16,636 --> 00:09:19,876 Speaker 1: he had and he realized that, you know, in the 156 00:09:19,876 --> 00:09:22,116 Speaker 1: past he had control of all his possessions, but as 157 00:09:22,156 --> 00:09:24,036 Speaker 1: soon as he took on board this new thing of 158 00:09:24,116 --> 00:09:28,516 Speaker 1: high status that changed it almost controlled him. I experienced 159 00:09:28,556 --> 00:09:30,596 Speaker 1: a hint of the Dido effect when we rented that 160 00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:36,556 Speaker 1: swanky Mustangs. The valet at our hotel did look at 161 00:09:36,596 --> 00:09:39,436 Speaker 1: me and Ryan a little oddly, like he was surprised 162 00:09:39,436 --> 00:09:41,116 Speaker 1: that the people who dropped off of that kind of 163 00:09:41,156 --> 00:09:44,316 Speaker 1: car had the crumpled clothes and crappy luggage that we did. 164 00:09:45,236 --> 00:09:47,716 Speaker 1: As we rode the elevated to our rooms, I thought 165 00:09:47,756 --> 00:09:50,676 Speaker 1: back to my beat up Nissan with the squeaky windshield 166 00:09:50,716 --> 00:09:53,876 Speaker 1: wipers and sticky coffee cup holders. None of that had 167 00:09:53,876 --> 00:09:56,276 Speaker 1: really bothered me when I drove it in earlier that morning, 168 00:09:56,796 --> 00:10:01,236 Speaker 1: But now my own car seemed well pretty crappy. I mean, 169 00:10:01,276 --> 00:10:03,396 Speaker 1: don't get me wrong, the Mustang was super fun to 170 00:10:03,476 --> 00:10:05,956 Speaker 1: ride around in, But if it entered into my life 171 00:10:05,956 --> 00:10:08,636 Speaker 1: on a more permanent basis, I might fall prey to 172 00:10:08,716 --> 00:10:12,036 Speaker 1: that row effect even more. I might wind up changing 173 00:10:12,076 --> 00:10:14,156 Speaker 1: the other things in my life to fit with the 174 00:10:14,196 --> 00:10:16,796 Speaker 1: fact that I now owned a swanky car. As the 175 00:10:16,876 --> 00:10:19,916 Speaker 1: name of Bruce's book suggests, my new ride might end 176 00:10:19,996 --> 00:10:23,876 Speaker 1: up possessing me far more than I possessed it. The 177 00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:25,876 Speaker 1: good news is that there is a way to enjoy 178 00:10:25,876 --> 00:10:27,716 Speaker 1: the happiness boost that Ryan and I got from the 179 00:10:27,796 --> 00:10:30,716 Speaker 1: Mustang ride without ending up on a treadmill of buying 180 00:10:30,756 --> 00:10:33,596 Speaker 1: a new car every few years. And we'll talk about 181 00:10:33,636 --> 00:10:36,956 Speaker 1: that science back strategy when the Happiness Lab returns in 182 00:10:36,996 --> 00:10:49,916 Speaker 1: a moment. So maybe they make us happy for a 183 00:10:49,956 --> 00:10:53,476 Speaker 1: little while, but over time we just stop deriving as 184 00:10:53,556 --> 00:10:56,596 Speaker 1: much satisfaction from them. I wanted to find some evidence 185 00:10:56,636 --> 00:10:59,796 Speaker 1: based strategies to help me decide about this car situation, 186 00:11:00,476 --> 00:11:02,756 Speaker 1: and so I decided to call a world expert on 187 00:11:02,836 --> 00:11:06,316 Speaker 1: happier purchasing. I'm a'm At Kumar. I'm an assistant professor 188 00:11:06,436 --> 00:11:09,236 Speaker 1: of marketing and psychology at the University of Texas at 189 00:11:09,236 --> 00:11:12,076 Speaker 1: Austin m It studies the way our minds mispredict the 190 00:11:12,076 --> 00:11:14,636 Speaker 1: pleasure we get from what we buy, and so I 191 00:11:14,676 --> 00:11:17,716 Speaker 1: told him about my car dilemma. Based on his research, 192 00:11:18,116 --> 00:11:20,916 Speaker 1: he predicted that any happiness boost I'd drive from buying 193 00:11:20,956 --> 00:11:24,116 Speaker 1: that Mustang wouldn't last much longer than the new car smell. 194 00:11:24,916 --> 00:11:27,076 Speaker 1: If you've listened to other episodes of The Happiness Lab, 195 00:11:27,476 --> 00:11:30,756 Speaker 1: you might know the reason why. A phenomenon that psychologists 196 00:11:30,756 --> 00:11:34,596 Speaker 1: have christened hedonic adaptation. We just get used to stuff 197 00:11:34,636 --> 00:11:37,836 Speaker 1: far quicker than we think. What seemed kind of new 198 00:11:37,876 --> 00:11:41,916 Speaker 1: and exciting at first, that excitement tends to fade. I 199 00:11:41,916 --> 00:11:43,916 Speaker 1: guess the other thing is that it's always there in 200 00:11:43,996 --> 00:11:47,396 Speaker 1: front of you, so when it malfunctions or if something 201 00:11:47,436 --> 00:11:50,556 Speaker 1: goes wrong, you're just kind of bothered by that. But 202 00:11:50,636 --> 00:11:52,996 Speaker 1: there's a second reason that our possessions don't make us 203 00:11:52,996 --> 00:11:56,236 Speaker 1: as happy as we think that green eyed monster is 204 00:11:56,236 --> 00:11:59,796 Speaker 1: always with us. People are often kind of peeved when 205 00:11:59,836 --> 00:12:02,596 Speaker 1: they find out that someone else has a nicer TV 206 00:12:02,716 --> 00:12:06,236 Speaker 1: than they do, or if they have a fancier wardrobe. 207 00:12:06,396 --> 00:12:08,996 Speaker 1: It can be similarly annoying to find out that someone 208 00:12:09,436 --> 00:12:11,436 Speaker 1: who has the same thing that you do, like the 209 00:12:11,476 --> 00:12:14,476 Speaker 1: same gadget that you have, or something like that, paid 210 00:12:14,516 --> 00:12:19,116 Speaker 1: substantially less for it. So these sorts of destructive comparisons 211 00:12:19,316 --> 00:12:21,836 Speaker 1: can stand in the way of happiness. So if I 212 00:12:21,876 --> 00:12:24,356 Speaker 1: caved in and splurged on a new car, not only 213 00:12:24,356 --> 00:12:27,596 Speaker 1: would every scratch indent make me sadder, but I'd also 214 00:12:27,676 --> 00:12:30,996 Speaker 1: unwittingly enter an arms race with my friends and neighbors 215 00:12:30,996 --> 00:12:34,516 Speaker 1: comparing my purchase to whatever car they had in their driveways, 216 00:12:35,156 --> 00:12:38,036 Speaker 1: And even a new Mustang would look crappy next to 217 00:12:38,076 --> 00:12:43,876 Speaker 1: my colleagues brand new tesla, but on its research shows 218 00:12:43,996 --> 00:12:46,316 Speaker 1: that there's an alternative kind of purchase we can make 219 00:12:46,796 --> 00:12:49,716 Speaker 1: that can bring us some lasting joy. Money could make 220 00:12:49,796 --> 00:12:52,956 Speaker 1: us happier if we made different decisions or choices with 221 00:12:53,156 --> 00:12:55,596 Speaker 1: what we did with it. To get the most happiness 222 00:12:55,596 --> 00:12:58,196 Speaker 1: bank for our buck, we should make purchases that are 223 00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:03,356 Speaker 1: experiential rather than material. So experiential purchases are essentially something 224 00:13:03,356 --> 00:13:06,556 Speaker 1: that you spend money on that's an event or a 225 00:13:06,636 --> 00:13:09,516 Speaker 1: series of events that you live through. So basically it's 226 00:13:09,556 --> 00:13:13,236 Speaker 1: money that you spend on doing things like travel, vacations, 227 00:13:13,636 --> 00:13:17,796 Speaker 1: dining out, going to concert sporting events. If you're anything 228 00:13:17,836 --> 00:13:19,996 Speaker 1: like me, you might feel a bit bad about spending 229 00:13:20,036 --> 00:13:22,476 Speaker 1: more of your money on meals and trips. It can 230 00:13:22,516 --> 00:13:25,556 Speaker 1: feel a little frivolous. So in some sense they might 231 00:13:25,676 --> 00:13:29,476 Speaker 1: seem fleeting, But in a way this is actually a 232 00:13:29,516 --> 00:13:33,916 Speaker 1: benefit of experiences compared to possessions. So people do tend 233 00:13:33,916 --> 00:13:37,276 Speaker 1: to habituate, to get used to things and derive less 234 00:13:37,356 --> 00:13:41,476 Speaker 1: value from them over time. With an experience that's already 235 00:13:41,556 --> 00:13:45,076 Speaker 1: over that doesn't seem to happen. But experiences don't just 236 00:13:45,156 --> 00:13:49,236 Speaker 1: make us feel better after we finish them. Experiential purchases 237 00:13:49,236 --> 00:13:52,796 Speaker 1: can also make us happier than material possessions, even before 238 00:13:52,836 --> 00:13:55,596 Speaker 1: we get to enjoy them. One thing that's interesting about 239 00:13:55,596 --> 00:13:59,036 Speaker 1: waiting is that waiting can also sometimes feel good. So 240 00:13:59,516 --> 00:14:02,236 Speaker 1: when it comes to material possessions, it feels more like 241 00:14:02,356 --> 00:14:07,156 Speaker 1: impatience or anxiety or frustration, But with respect to experiential purchases, 242 00:14:07,436 --> 00:14:10,076 Speaker 1: waiting is just a more positive st We tend to 243 00:14:10,076 --> 00:14:13,276 Speaker 1: look forward to what's to come with great excitement and delight. 244 00:14:13,316 --> 00:14:16,116 Speaker 1: We look at restaurant menus, and we go through our 245 00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:19,716 Speaker 1: travel plans in advance. That tends to feel good instead 246 00:14:19,756 --> 00:14:22,516 Speaker 1: of bad. But Ama has found that the biggest reason 247 00:14:22,556 --> 00:14:25,836 Speaker 1: experiences bring us more joy is that they aren't normally 248 00:14:25,836 --> 00:14:30,316 Speaker 1: a solitary activity. So if your purchases are promoting social interaction, 249 00:14:30,796 --> 00:14:33,836 Speaker 1: if you're talking about the things that you've done, or 250 00:14:33,876 --> 00:14:36,636 Speaker 1: if you're doing them with other people, that's one reason 251 00:14:36,916 --> 00:14:40,516 Speaker 1: they're going to make you happier than some material items 252 00:14:40,556 --> 00:14:43,676 Speaker 1: that you might buy. And experiential purchases don't just keep 253 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:46,716 Speaker 1: us social while we're doing them, they also let us 254 00:14:46,716 --> 00:14:49,676 Speaker 1: connect with people afterwards too, So if you go on 255 00:14:49,716 --> 00:14:52,276 Speaker 1: a vacation, somewhere. There's all sorts of things that you 256 00:14:52,316 --> 00:14:54,756 Speaker 1: can talk about, what you did, what you saw, who 257 00:14:54,796 --> 00:14:57,396 Speaker 1: you were with, what you ate. There's just lots of 258 00:14:57,796 --> 00:15:01,876 Speaker 1: directions to go. It's a bit harder with material goods 259 00:15:02,316 --> 00:15:05,276 Speaker 1: and sharing stories about things you've done. We're just reliving 260 00:15:05,276 --> 00:15:09,596 Speaker 1: the memories. Also has another happiness boosting effect. Turns out 261 00:15:09,636 --> 00:15:13,916 Speaker 1: that sort of generally speaking, reflecting on experiential purchases inspires 262 00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:17,316 Speaker 1: more gratitude than reflecting on material purchases, So people are 263 00:15:17,356 --> 00:15:20,796 Speaker 1: more grateful for what they've done than for what they have. 264 00:15:21,436 --> 00:15:25,316 Speaker 1: Part of the reason that this is particularly interesting is 265 00:15:25,356 --> 00:15:30,156 Speaker 1: because of what gratitude tends to predict. So researchers have 266 00:15:30,196 --> 00:15:33,876 Speaker 1: found that feeling grateful is associated with a whole host 267 00:15:33,956 --> 00:15:36,956 Speaker 1: of positive outcomes. So in some fun studies we've done, 268 00:15:36,956 --> 00:15:39,156 Speaker 1: for instance, we found that when people think about their 269 00:15:39,196 --> 00:15:42,796 Speaker 1: experiences rather than possessions they've bought, they end up being 270 00:15:42,796 --> 00:15:45,716 Speaker 1: more generous to others. They end up treating other people 271 00:15:45,876 --> 00:15:50,036 Speaker 1: better as a result of reflecting on their experiential purchases. 272 00:15:50,556 --> 00:15:53,756 Speaker 1: All this goes to say, experiences, be they big or small, 273 00:15:54,236 --> 00:15:58,156 Speaker 1: they beat material purchases on literally every happiness metric AMH 274 00:15:58,196 --> 00:16:01,676 Speaker 1: has study, and yet we still can't seem to break 275 00:16:01,676 --> 00:16:05,076 Speaker 1: our habit of filling our closets and addicts and garages 276 00:16:05,356 --> 00:16:08,996 Speaker 1: with so much stuff. So after the break, I'll introduce 277 00:16:08,996 --> 00:16:11,436 Speaker 1: you to a person who has taken this research to heart, 278 00:16:12,036 --> 00:16:14,996 Speaker 1: someone who became so weighed down by her possessions that 279 00:16:15,116 --> 00:16:18,036 Speaker 1: she decided to get rid of nearly all of them 280 00:16:18,076 --> 00:16:20,996 Speaker 1: and became a lot happier as a result. If I'm 281 00:16:20,996 --> 00:16:23,396 Speaker 1: really honest, if I didn't love it or use it, 282 00:16:23,396 --> 00:16:26,476 Speaker 1: it was gone. The Happiness lab will be right back. 283 00:16:35,356 --> 00:16:37,436 Speaker 1: In some ways, I'm like, who was she who was 284 00:16:37,436 --> 00:16:41,876 Speaker 1: old school Kate? I would say that I was someone 285 00:16:41,916 --> 00:16:45,236 Speaker 1: who basically spent every penny that I earned. I caught 286 00:16:45,316 --> 00:16:48,596 Speaker 1: up with author and blogger Kate Flanders via zoom. If 287 00:16:48,636 --> 00:16:52,356 Speaker 1: her bedroom sounds a little echoy, it's because there's virtually 288 00:16:52,396 --> 00:16:55,596 Speaker 1: nothing in it. But it wasn't always like that. I 289 00:16:55,756 --> 00:16:59,876 Speaker 1: definitely bought things whenever I wasn't feeling great. But then 290 00:16:59,876 --> 00:17:01,356 Speaker 1: when you feel your home with stuff that you don't 291 00:17:01,356 --> 00:17:04,916 Speaker 1: even use, it actually also feels worse. I would always 292 00:17:04,916 --> 00:17:07,796 Speaker 1: text my best friend Emma and tell her whatever silly 293 00:17:07,836 --> 00:17:11,276 Speaker 1: thing I was thinking of buying. Like Emma, I think 294 00:17:11,276 --> 00:17:14,396 Speaker 1: I need all new betting, and she's like, but do 295 00:17:14,476 --> 00:17:18,796 Speaker 1: you like do you need new betting? And I would 296 00:17:18,836 --> 00:17:21,156 Speaker 1: just have this idea in my head that somehow that 297 00:17:21,236 --> 00:17:22,996 Speaker 1: was the thing that was going to fix me that day, 298 00:17:23,156 --> 00:17:26,476 Speaker 1: Like if I somehow made my bedroom look different or whatever, 299 00:17:26,516 --> 00:17:28,636 Speaker 1: that that was somehow going to fix whatever was going on. 300 00:17:28,956 --> 00:17:32,236 Speaker 1: Kate's material purchases followed a pattern that's familiar to many 301 00:17:32,236 --> 00:17:34,716 Speaker 1: of us. She bought things in the hope that they 302 00:17:34,716 --> 00:17:37,876 Speaker 1: would make her a better, more interesting person. She filled 303 00:17:37,876 --> 00:17:41,116 Speaker 1: her small apartment with unread books and clothes, and then 304 00:17:41,156 --> 00:17:44,516 Speaker 1: added cameras, paints, brushes, and other art supplies. I had 305 00:17:44,516 --> 00:17:46,556 Speaker 1: purchased things thinking I would like to be the kind 306 00:17:46,556 --> 00:17:49,116 Speaker 1: of person who does X, Y or Z, but I 307 00:17:49,156 --> 00:17:51,356 Speaker 1: never ended up doing any of it. At the time, 308 00:17:51,476 --> 00:17:54,276 Speaker 1: Kate wasn't all that bothered by her shopping habits, but 309 00:17:54,396 --> 00:17:57,676 Speaker 1: she did want to fix her financial situation by spending 310 00:17:57,716 --> 00:18:00,356 Speaker 1: way more than she earned, she'd run up over thirty 311 00:18:00,356 --> 00:18:02,916 Speaker 1: thousand dollars in debt. I decided that for a year 312 00:18:03,476 --> 00:18:05,956 Speaker 1: I just wouldn't buy anything unless it was absolutely essential. 313 00:18:06,076 --> 00:18:08,836 Speaker 1: The things I could buy were like groceries or put 314 00:18:08,836 --> 00:18:11,236 Speaker 1: gas in my car. If I needed it. It had 315 00:18:11,276 --> 00:18:13,676 Speaker 1: to be essential, otherwise it just was off the list. 316 00:18:13,836 --> 00:18:16,236 Speaker 1: Kate's shopping band was just supposed to reduce her debt, 317 00:18:16,396 --> 00:18:18,476 Speaker 1: but it ended up teaching her a lot more about 318 00:18:18,476 --> 00:18:21,276 Speaker 1: happiness than she expected. As the flow of books and 319 00:18:21,356 --> 00:18:24,236 Speaker 1: clothes and a gazillion other material purchases was cut off, 320 00:18:24,876 --> 00:18:27,716 Speaker 1: Kate started to realize just how cluttered her life had been. 321 00:18:28,196 --> 00:18:30,276 Speaker 1: I was kind of sick of my drawers always being full, 322 00:18:30,396 --> 00:18:33,276 Speaker 1: or my closet being full. Like I've always been someone 323 00:18:33,276 --> 00:18:35,756 Speaker 1: who only wears the same two or three outfits, So 324 00:18:35,796 --> 00:18:37,916 Speaker 1: why did I have a closet full of clothes or 325 00:18:38,116 --> 00:18:40,836 Speaker 1: a dresser full of clothes? It just didn't really make sense. 326 00:18:41,276 --> 00:18:44,316 Speaker 1: And so I think as I started decluttering, especially because 327 00:18:44,316 --> 00:18:46,556 Speaker 1: I was really aggressive in the beginning, I got rid 328 00:18:46,556 --> 00:18:48,436 Speaker 1: of something like fifty percent of my stuff in the 329 00:18:48,476 --> 00:18:53,476 Speaker 1: first six months. And I do remember after that just 330 00:18:53,556 --> 00:18:56,516 Speaker 1: noticing like when I walked into a room, not only 331 00:18:56,556 --> 00:18:58,876 Speaker 1: did it feel like lighter is a good word for it, 332 00:18:59,116 --> 00:19:01,996 Speaker 1: but it also actually just felt more inviting. Kate's yearlong 333 00:19:02,116 --> 00:19:05,596 Speaker 1: shopping band and radical decluttering made her realize that she 334 00:19:05,636 --> 00:19:08,676 Speaker 1: didn't need as many material things as she thought. Her 335 00:19:08,676 --> 00:19:11,956 Speaker 1: project also led to a new book, The Year of Less, 336 00:19:11,956 --> 00:19:14,996 Speaker 1: How I stopped shopping, gave away my belongings, and discovered 337 00:19:15,036 --> 00:19:17,156 Speaker 1: life is worth more than anything you can buy in 338 00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:20,196 Speaker 1: a store. Kate had always wanted to become a professional writer, 339 00:19:20,716 --> 00:19:24,636 Speaker 1: but her financial situation made that impossible. Having learned to 340 00:19:24,676 --> 00:19:27,396 Speaker 1: live with less stuff, she finally got the freedom she 341 00:19:27,476 --> 00:19:30,396 Speaker 1: needed to dive into her dream career. Her new found 342 00:19:30,436 --> 00:19:33,356 Speaker 1: savings also gave her the funds she needed for something else, 343 00:19:33,916 --> 00:19:37,236 Speaker 1: the opportunity to experience the wider world. I didn't travel 344 00:19:37,276 --> 00:19:39,836 Speaker 1: as a kid. We didn't do that, but I always 345 00:19:39,876 --> 00:19:41,516 Speaker 1: wanted to. Like I knew by the time I was 346 00:19:41,556 --> 00:19:43,756 Speaker 1: a teenager that that was something I was interested in. 347 00:19:44,356 --> 00:19:47,156 Speaker 1: I felt like I sort of started slow, you know. 348 00:19:47,196 --> 00:19:50,276 Speaker 1: I would book three nights away with a friend somewhere, 349 00:19:50,796 --> 00:19:53,796 Speaker 1: went away to a wedding to a friend that, like 350 00:19:53,836 --> 00:19:55,516 Speaker 1: I never would have been able to afford to go 351 00:19:55,556 --> 00:19:57,916 Speaker 1: to her wedding. Since Kate can write from anywhere in 352 00:19:57,916 --> 00:20:01,356 Speaker 1: the world, she decided to continue traveling. She gave up 353 00:20:01,356 --> 00:20:04,236 Speaker 1: her apartment and now spends her time visiting friends and 354 00:20:04,356 --> 00:20:08,036 Speaker 1: experiencing new countries and cultures. Traveling made sense to me, 355 00:20:08,436 --> 00:20:11,596 Speaker 1: like it it made me feel more like myself than 356 00:20:11,676 --> 00:20:15,116 Speaker 1: anything else, and just as I'm its work would suggest, 357 00:20:15,716 --> 00:20:19,636 Speaker 1: these new experiential purchases have given Kate far more joyful 358 00:20:19,676 --> 00:20:22,916 Speaker 1: memories than any of her old material things. I don't 359 00:20:22,916 --> 00:20:25,836 Speaker 1: remember the majority of what I decluttered and got rid of, 360 00:20:26,196 --> 00:20:30,156 Speaker 1: and even just being able to recall things like the 361 00:20:31,196 --> 00:20:33,236 Speaker 1: hotel that I stayed up for my friend's wedding or 362 00:20:33,236 --> 00:20:35,596 Speaker 1: the house party that I went to with her and 363 00:20:35,636 --> 00:20:38,476 Speaker 1: her friends, like the people I met in the conversations 364 00:20:38,476 --> 00:20:41,076 Speaker 1: that we had, and I think I had never really 365 00:20:41,116 --> 00:20:44,676 Speaker 1: stopped to savor moments like that before, Like really, I 366 00:20:44,716 --> 00:20:47,876 Speaker 1: can remember the experiences because of how I felt or 367 00:20:47,876 --> 00:20:52,716 Speaker 1: how the air smelt in certain cities, And I mean, 368 00:20:52,756 --> 00:20:54,836 Speaker 1: I don't remember anything like that of what I decluttered 369 00:20:54,916 --> 00:20:57,076 Speaker 1: or even what I've purchased in the past. When she's 370 00:20:57,116 --> 00:20:59,876 Speaker 1: not traveling, Kate uses a single room at her dad's 371 00:20:59,876 --> 00:21:02,676 Speaker 1: house as her base camp. That was where she met 372 00:21:02,676 --> 00:21:05,996 Speaker 1: me over zoom. It was pretty spartan. One of the 373 00:21:06,036 --> 00:21:08,036 Speaker 1: things that's cool about doing this interview is I'm able 374 00:21:08,156 --> 00:21:11,236 Speaker 1: on zoom to look to your room and I see 375 00:21:12,276 --> 00:21:14,916 Speaker 1: a coat rack with the hat and a coat, but 376 00:21:15,476 --> 00:21:18,036 Speaker 1: maybe a chair, but like that's it. Yes, I have 377 00:21:18,036 --> 00:21:21,676 Speaker 1: a painting. Yes, I see the painting. It's a lovely painting. 378 00:21:21,716 --> 00:21:24,836 Speaker 1: Actually it's done by a friend of mine, So yeah, 379 00:21:24,876 --> 00:21:28,316 Speaker 1: it was nice to hang that up. Recently, Kate has 380 00:21:28,356 --> 00:21:31,316 Speaker 1: around forty items of clothing like not including socks and underwear, 381 00:21:31,356 --> 00:21:34,116 Speaker 1: and a few pairs of shoes, hiking boots, kind of 382 00:21:34,156 --> 00:21:37,396 Speaker 1: regular boots, running shoes, and sandals, and that's it. Having 383 00:21:37,396 --> 00:21:40,756 Speaker 1: once been possessed by her material purchases, Kate has now 384 00:21:40,756 --> 00:21:44,316 Speaker 1: broken free. Now. The few things Kate does have all 385 00:21:44,316 --> 00:21:47,156 Speaker 1: serve a purpose or have an important meaning. One of 386 00:21:47,156 --> 00:21:50,196 Speaker 1: the things that I kept was my desk, and that's 387 00:21:50,196 --> 00:21:53,036 Speaker 1: because I built it with my dad. You just have 388 00:21:53,076 --> 00:21:55,196 Speaker 1: more appreciation in general for the things. I think that 389 00:21:55,236 --> 00:21:58,436 Speaker 1: you understand where they came from. It also seems like 390 00:21:58,636 --> 00:22:03,396 Speaker 1: you're keeping material objects that also have this feature of 391 00:22:03,436 --> 00:22:05,916 Speaker 1: they were experiences for you. They were memories for you too, 392 00:22:06,036 --> 00:22:07,876 Speaker 1: right Like the desk is a memory that you have 393 00:22:07,916 --> 00:22:11,676 Speaker 1: with your dad, and so winds of totally special in essence. 394 00:22:11,676 --> 00:22:13,636 Speaker 1: That is something I can't really imagine I would ever 395 00:22:13,676 --> 00:22:16,156 Speaker 1: get rid of those. Kate's onto something really important here. 396 00:22:17,076 --> 00:22:20,516 Speaker 1: The material possessions we do love are usually imbued with 397 00:22:20,556 --> 00:22:24,156 Speaker 1: a certain experiential joy. It got me thinking back to 398 00:22:24,196 --> 00:22:27,276 Speaker 1: what Ahmit Kumar had explained when we chatted before. There's 399 00:22:27,276 --> 00:22:30,156 Speaker 1: this sort of fuzzy boundary between what's an experience and 400 00:22:30,156 --> 00:22:33,716 Speaker 1: what's a possession. Take a bicycle, for example, that's something 401 00:22:33,716 --> 00:22:36,316 Speaker 1: that you keep in your possession, but it's literally a 402 00:22:36,396 --> 00:22:39,836 Speaker 1: vehicle for experiences. If you think about it in terms 403 00:22:39,836 --> 00:22:43,596 Speaker 1: of its features, it's sort of specifications. It's going to 404 00:22:43,636 --> 00:22:46,556 Speaker 1: feel a little more possession e and it can lead 405 00:22:46,596 --> 00:22:49,676 Speaker 1: to some of these problems with comparison, for instance, that 406 00:22:49,756 --> 00:22:52,516 Speaker 1: we've talked about. But if you think about going out 407 00:22:52,516 --> 00:22:55,076 Speaker 1: on the trails, then all of a sudden that particular 408 00:22:55,116 --> 00:22:58,796 Speaker 1: purchase might be something that inspires more happiness within you 409 00:22:59,116 --> 00:23:01,756 Speaker 1: as a result of construing it in terms of its 410 00:23:01,756 --> 00:23:05,756 Speaker 1: experiential nature. After talking with Kate and Amitt, I'm more 411 00:23:05,796 --> 00:23:07,796 Speaker 1: convinced than ever that I don't need a new car. 412 00:23:08,636 --> 00:23:10,596 Speaker 1: I also realize that I can think of my beat 413 00:23:10,676 --> 00:23:13,956 Speaker 1: up Nissan in a different light. I can construe it 414 00:23:14,036 --> 00:23:17,716 Speaker 1: as a giver of new experiences, one that can connect 415 00:23:17,716 --> 00:23:25,036 Speaker 1: me socially with the people I really care about. And so, 416 00:23:25,156 --> 00:23:29,276 Speaker 1: dear podcast listener, welcome, inside my beat up Nissan, which 417 00:23:29,356 --> 00:23:31,316 Speaker 1: has recently become less beat up than it used to 418 00:23:31,356 --> 00:23:34,076 Speaker 1: be since I did, in fact take Ryan's sage advice 419 00:23:34,476 --> 00:23:39,756 Speaker 1: and made some strategic auto body repairs. Thanks Ryan, Making 420 00:23:39,756 --> 00:23:42,116 Speaker 1: this episode has given me some real gratitude for these 421 00:23:42,116 --> 00:23:44,876 Speaker 1: old wheels, and it's helped me reframe how I think 422 00:23:44,916 --> 00:23:48,076 Speaker 1: about my car. Generally, this Nissan is going to be 423 00:23:48,116 --> 00:23:50,996 Speaker 1: my doorway to new experiences. It's going to be the 424 00:23:51,036 --> 00:23:53,116 Speaker 1: car that takes me for nice meals with my husband 425 00:23:53,756 --> 00:23:56,116 Speaker 1: or on trips to see my old friends. And with 426 00:23:56,156 --> 00:23:58,476 Speaker 1: all that money I'll save from not buying a Mustang, 427 00:23:59,076 --> 00:24:01,796 Speaker 1: I'm hopefully I can invest in even more fun experiential 428 00:24:01,796 --> 00:24:04,956 Speaker 1: purchases in the future. I can pay for a cool 429 00:24:04,996 --> 00:24:08,676 Speaker 1: new yoga class online and enjoy the anticipation of a 430 00:24:08,756 --> 00:24:12,676 Speaker 1: fantas plastic future vacation, hopefully one that will involve traveling 431 00:24:12,716 --> 00:24:16,796 Speaker 1: somewhere warm and sunny, and maybe just maybe a small 432 00:24:16,836 --> 00:24:20,276 Speaker 1: rental car splurge too, because I might enjoy just a 433 00:24:20,316 --> 00:24:47,396 Speaker 1: little more muscle car fun sometime soon. The Happiness Lab 434 00:24:47,436 --> 00:24:50,316 Speaker 1: is co written and produced by Ryan Dilley. Our original 435 00:24:50,396 --> 00:24:53,996 Speaker 1: music was composed by Zachary Silver, with additional scoring mixing 436 00:24:54,036 --> 00:24:57,716 Speaker 1: and mastering by Evan Viola. Pete Naton also helped with production. 437 00:24:58,316 --> 00:25:00,996 Speaker 1: Joseph Friedman checked our facts and our editing was done 438 00:25:01,036 --> 00:25:04,956 Speaker 1: by Sophie Crane mciven. Special thanks to mil LaBelle, Carl Niggliori, 439 00:25:05,236 --> 00:25:09,916 Speaker 1: Heather Fain, Julia Barton, Maggie Taylor, Maya Kang, Jacob Weisberg, 440 00:25:09,996 --> 00:25:13,116 Speaker 1: and my agent Ben Davis. The Happiness Lab is brought 441 00:25:13,156 --> 00:25:16,276 Speaker 1: to you by Pushkin Industries and me, Doctor Laurie Santos