Speaker 1: Hi, you guys. If you didn't hear last week, we
Speaker 1: are dropping. I have a brand new podcast on iHeartRadio
Speaker 1: is called No Autographs Please, and it's with the King
Speaker 1: Brian Sofie. I gotta tell you Arden, I am having
Speaker 1: an absolute riot. It's legitimately so fine. It's just like,
Speaker 1: leave your problems behind. Take an hour's shorter than our
Speaker 1: normal podcast, right, Doctor Banana is only an hour. It's funny,
Speaker 1: people just laughing, and it's there's some improv portion, there's
Speaker 1: some like life, bad dates, bad Dates. It's so fun.
Speaker 1: We hope you will check it out, like and subscribe.
Speaker 1: We're gonna put the first three in our feed, but
Speaker 1: you can go on the real feed. You can go
Speaker 1: on to know how ourgographs please on Apple and just
Speaker 1: like and subscribe. Please do so. This one now this
Speaker 1: week is with Lauren Lobkis gotcha No, who are you wearing?
Speaker 1: Will be pressed? Yeah, and I hear it last there
Speaker 1: be this and they've got lots of podcast but honey, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no trees. We're leaving the clam and life like celebrities
Speaker 1: sharing my favorite baby bit recipes, but no no hotographs
Speaker 1: nor manager. I had to come alive, right, I have
Speaker 1: to be the bats. Ryan are yoking and you come
Speaker 1: out of your circle to beat Listen. All I know
Speaker 1: is this, Yes, when I did a yoga twice? Yes,
Speaker 1: they have you do a position where you hang upside down. Yes,
Speaker 1: as a bat. Okay, and I have two words to
Speaker 1: me plus one. So three words for Robert Pattinson. Huh,
Speaker 1: I'm the batman? Do you understand I? Women, I'm sorry
Speaker 1: that felt like you're a threat, like like I was
Speaker 1: doubting you. I guess what, honey, you are the batman
Speaker 1: of this podcast. Well as a very famous person. Ardn't
Speaker 1: of course I'm threatened by Robert Pattinson's career. Can I
Speaker 1: just say, Robert Pattinson has been coming after you for years.
Speaker 1: You would have been such a better Edward College. Of course,
Speaker 1: you would have been the perfect lydiatar. We get passed over. Hello,
Speaker 1: and welcome to another episode. I can't believe it. No autocrass,
Speaker 1: but I can't believe it. This is our sophomore effort.
Speaker 1: This is our sophomore effort. And guess what, we've got
Speaker 1: a star start. Like the leading movies. Literally, the press
Speaker 1: is here. They're in the bushes, the press. Did anyone
Speaker 1: follow you in Scooba gear? Lauren Lapka? Oh? Hi, Next
Speaker 1: guess from Jurassic World? You know her from the Wrong Missy?
Speaker 1: You know her from Orange? Is this new black? You
Speaker 1: know from Orange? You you're a good girl. Orange. You're
Speaker 1: a good girl. Orange, You're a good girl. Ladies and gentlemen,
Speaker 1: Lauren Lapka, I'm so happy to be here. Second guess, well,
Speaker 1: I had to break three like you have paparazzi that
Speaker 1: kind of lives outside of your plane. Yes, because I
Speaker 1: wasn't sure if that was just how that person looked. No,
Speaker 1: otherwise they would have growth coming up. I recently saw
Speaker 1: that the last they would be like Pinocchio that but
Speaker 1: like when he had to lie? Did you see the
Speaker 1: Guermo del Toro version of so he when he Pinocchio
Speaker 1: had to save Geppetto and he had to lie and
Speaker 1: make his nose grow like a tree shrub you get
Speaker 1: him out of the store. Any sense? It was like,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, sure it's pronounced that way, Pinocchio because I
Speaker 1: read it as Pinaccio. I read it as Mozzarel. I
Speaker 1: read it as Pinocchio, pins Pinocchio, Pinisio. Maybe I'd like
Speaker 1: to see growl. Oh my god, Lauren, I just had
Speaker 1: a vision, Pini Tokio. I just had a vision of
Speaker 1: a calling of a press thing which I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: put into the back Evening's not gonn bring it up.
Speaker 1: I know the story. I have to say it. It
Speaker 1: tickles me from It's the funniest story that anyone that
Speaker 1: we're told, and no one's ever heard. It's the funniest story.
Speaker 1: It's the greatest myth of all time. Even doctor Banana
Speaker 1: shout out, Doctor Banana, shout out the ones and two.
Speaker 1: You don't even know this story. This is the greatest story.
Speaker 1: Maybe at the end, maybe, but maybe we'll be closed
Speaker 1: up by the end of the pod. But and I'm
Speaker 1: not part of it. No, you're here. You mean by
Speaker 1: today this podcast wraps up fourth season. By the way,
Speaker 1: You're Gonna be, you Gonna be a series. You are
Speaker 1: getting a gift card today. I am getting a seventy
Speaker 1: five dollars and by the way, American exact gift card
Speaker 1: was made in the US of A. Okay, well it
Speaker 1: better be, and the better believe that. I'm going to
Speaker 1: go straight to the Mall of America and have been
Speaker 1: that shood what are you gonna get you swipe swipes?
Speaker 1: What are you gonna do? Song? By the way, those
Speaker 1: the fact that I mean, the way the way they
Speaker 1: expect us to have no can I do this no
Speaker 1: pubis By the way. Also, look, I don't mind the
Speaker 1: shape of my ass. I gotta fine as sure the
Speaker 1: actual flesh. Do I want everyone to see the action
Speaker 1: of my skin. It's fine in a bathing suit, the
Speaker 1: skin it is at all order to think that we're
Speaker 1: all are full on assholes onto. I don't want my
Speaker 1: asshole on now, which brings us to no auto bring
Speaker 1: it back to me. Okay, you know, Mike, Okay. I
Speaker 1: want also to say we both traveled with Brian to
Speaker 1: Rhode Island. Yes, and now you missed this. Bridan was
Speaker 1: going on a date Bridan but not on a bunch
Speaker 1: of dates to Rhode Island. Ran went again when we
Speaker 1: went again without me. But you're welcome, you were invited.
Speaker 1: You have a life and a family. You have a life,
Speaker 1: life and a family. Brian went without me, Brian her choice.
Speaker 1: Brian got ready to go on a date. He was
Speaker 1: wearing a bathing with a with a windbreaker tucked in,
Speaker 1: tucked it tucked in like he tucked in, he tucked into.
Speaker 1: I was going to Newports tucked in, he tucked into
Speaker 1: his bathing suit like Bruce raw string string she was
Speaker 1: like panty shorts and like boat. She was was a
Speaker 1: tucked in windbreaker that he'd walked to the of course,
Speaker 1: and my tennis had as you did you expect to
Speaker 1: go in the water? No, I had, No. I didn't
Speaker 1: think that was going to happen. I expect him to
Speaker 1: be wearing a bathing suit as well. You have to
Speaker 1: understand no, because we were going to a place in
Speaker 1: Newport that looked kind of like fancy the house in
Speaker 1: Arden goes. I think he deserves better than Wow, you
Speaker 1: put on shittier than how she said it. It was no.
Speaker 1: I have my friend Brian, and I felt like I
Speaker 1: just again, I had not this was right. I was
Speaker 1: as a divorcee yr. I had not. Actually I had
Speaker 1: not actually activated any accounts. Yeah, I was. So I
Speaker 1: was more asking questions. So the idea of going on
Speaker 1: a date was scary to me, and I was like,
Speaker 1: you're look, is this what you would wear? I just
Speaker 1: didn't know is this what it's like out there? So
Speaker 1: that I was like, so I knew when I started dating.
Speaker 1: I had to get a windbreaker. I had to get
Speaker 1: men's trunk. I did tucket it. I had to get
Speaker 1: boat shoes, I had to get a tennis had lesson,
Speaker 1: learn less and learn change often. I did end up
Speaker 1: putting on a shirt with a collar. But it was
Speaker 1: a beautiful I mean it was like, am I wrong
Speaker 1: in thinking that if two men are going on a date,
Speaker 1: one won't be mad to see the other's penis outlined
Speaker 1: by a bathing suit? I don't think that would be
Speaker 1: that's true because all every man wants to send, not
Speaker 1: necessarily receive. Any man on earth wants to send. Yes,
Speaker 1: is it just a close up of his dick and doorballs? Now?
Speaker 1: You I remember you got one and it said it
Speaker 1: said while we were there, and it just said uncut?
Speaker 1: What did it say? First of all, uncut gems? And
Speaker 1: I am talking about that, I'm Sandler movie Dick is
Speaker 1: out of context? Then dick is cut? Yeah, okay, honey.
Speaker 1: What happened was someone reached out to me grinder, and
Speaker 1: the pickup line was the question that I was asked, Yeah,
Speaker 1: big loads, big loads. That wasn't very serve them, you know, man,
Speaker 1: I like to think that I'm pretty virile. And uh,
Speaker 1: all I know is you come around me. Yeah, get
Speaker 1: out that fucking pop tart baby, yeah, no icing, Yeah,
Speaker 1: because it's gonna fill up with sprinkles. Yes, you know, yes,
Speaker 1: Can I just say I love talking metaphors? Sprinkles come
Speaker 1: out of your peepee? Of course they did. We I
Speaker 1: went on a date with somebody who turned out to
Speaker 1: be not a nice person nowhere. And the upshot that
Speaker 1: we know that we know, And the upshot was I
Speaker 1: found out that he confessed again, I've not been on
Speaker 1: any date at all in years. When he confessed he
Speaker 1: was embarrassed that he basically like coughed dust, like he
Speaker 1: had nothing, like nothing came out I have. I didn't
Speaker 1: even like, I didn't like hook up with it. He
Speaker 1: just but he was like he told me his fear.
Speaker 1: He was worried about losing his hair. And you know
Speaker 1: this person, well, I'm pretending I don't. Okay, I know
Speaker 1: who this is. I have some hot gauss yeah about
Speaker 1: I have a friend who works in entertainment. Mary Hart,
Speaker 1: it's very hard the white suppress a supremacist. There was
Speaker 1: a rumor that she was she spoke at like Trump rallies.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I shouldn't even say that, Okay, okay
Speaker 1: because I don't know, but anyway, okay, and I would
Speaker 1: hate to offend her obviously, But um, apparently propetia makes
Speaker 1: you come clear. What isn't that wild? No? One that
Speaker 1: makes it come out like a color, like a rainbow,
Speaker 1: like a like a like a like a swirl, like
Speaker 1: a swirl, like doesn't like gas puddle like I'm over
Speaker 1: at exactly. Yeah, Sam, I'm surprised they haven't come up
Speaker 1: with that yet. There should be a pill you can
Speaker 1: take to make your compul Yeah. It makes things come
Speaker 1: out of our bodies differently. I do want to say this.
Speaker 1: There is such a thing back to the anything, There
Speaker 1: is such a thing. I have learned a butt facial
Speaker 1: What is that? Basically? But you have to like apparently
Speaker 1: go in. This person who by the way told me,
Speaker 1: said it, like, yeah, just go get when you have
Speaker 1: to do it every week? And I'm like, are you
Speaker 1: win money? And time? Do they have? They like botox it,
Speaker 1: they like do all this stuff to make it like look, wait,
Speaker 1: that must or the cheeks Oh no, no, no, the
Speaker 1: cheeks that must be what a lot of these people
Speaker 1: are doing you have to Oh no, I think they do.
Speaker 1: Like I think it's like a thing. So wait, what
Speaker 1: do they do? They do you can move botox and
Speaker 1: your booty. Yeah, it's called a butt facial. I don't
Speaker 1: want to do that. I'm not recommending it. I don't
Speaker 1: want to do I think should we do that, should
Speaker 1: sit on it and have pooke them out? Right? Next week?
Speaker 1: You're absolutely right? Can I just say, your makeup looking really,
Speaker 1: we'll get to your makeup. They talk about that now, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you look good, look forward, we'll talk about that. Everyone knows.
Speaker 1: At the end of this episode, we make a peanut
Speaker 1: and we're going to get talk beauty. We talk beauty.
Speaker 1: And now, Brian, now I want to give a shout
Speaker 1: out to our no autograph please of the week. Yes, okay,
Speaker 1: Now for those of you who don't remember new from
Speaker 1: our one episode. If you couldn't remember from our one episode,
Speaker 1: because I no and no out of graphs please. Energy.
Speaker 1: It's sort of like a fucket energy. It's something who
Speaker 1: was blindly sometimes delusionally confident and aspired to that. Yes, okay, yes,
Speaker 1: So I want to give because again because because we can,
Speaker 1: we can be hard on ourselves. Of course. And I
Speaker 1: feel like I want to incorporate some of that fake
Speaker 1: it tea and make it like blind confidence Hollywood Provado.
Speaker 1: So here's a person that I would like, Denomic. This
Speaker 1: is circling back to the hometown of where you had
Speaker 1: your date and think in Rhode Island. So there's a
Speaker 1: general store. It's the only store in town. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: give out, shout out Wilbur's General Store. I've been there's
Speaker 1: how great is that store? Literally we did how great
Speaker 1: is Wilbur's. It's a fantastic store what I love so much.
Speaker 1: You walk in and it kind of reminds you of
Speaker 1: old dime stores from the end of the day. Completely
Speaker 1: it has like a Woolworth's field from nineteen twenty, wooden,
Speaker 1: creaky floor. But then you kind of go into other
Speaker 1: rooms and there's like good home whears, like like napkin sets,
Speaker 1: some like you know, butter dishes and cans beautiful and
Speaker 1: then you keep going and you can go to like
Speaker 1: the paint department and get chained for your Anna. You've
Speaker 1: been there, and this is the only store in town.
Speaker 1: This is it. And that's honestly where that's where my
Speaker 1: you know, bike comes to a sputter stop because I
Speaker 1: feel I need many stores and many options that I
Speaker 1: don't know that I could handle one store, one store,
Speaker 1: everything online Nordstrum though, it's like the Nordstrom, a little
Speaker 1: compet It's like the Nordstrum where everyone knows everybody's business. Well,
Speaker 1: I hope you don't ever move to Communist Russia from
Speaker 1: back in the day options. Thank you. That's right. Are
Speaker 1: we really going to have this fight again? No, you're right.
Speaker 1: I said we wouldn't do this. That's that's why I
Speaker 1: got divorced. That's different. Differently it is divorced. Our fight
Speaker 1: was so bad. We had a divorce. Different everyone else.
Speaker 1: I hate fuck you. Fould you foot college. Mom swear
Speaker 1: in front of me, thank you for fixing than we
Speaker 1: can't say such. No, that was from a real Housewives
Speaker 1: of Salt Lake City. This sun goes you don't want mom.
Speaker 1: Fudge College, honestly fudge that Fudge College. I did see
Speaker 1: the Fudge College shirts. Did you see that? Yeah, we're
Speaker 1: incredibly Fudge College. So here's my shout out to no
Speaker 1: autographs please. Energy of the week. There was a woman
Speaker 1: who shall remain nameless from my hometown. She had no teeth,
Speaker 1: and she smoked a corn cob pipe. She was a
Speaker 1: little old lady. Sounds like my future aspiration by So
Speaker 1: she would hang out at Wilbur's at the counter and
Speaker 1: just like fucking hold people. My mom would be like,
Speaker 1: oh shit, there's so and so all day. You're like,
Speaker 1: you didn't want to get cornered by her. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: she didn't have a driver's license, and there's no obviously
Speaker 1: there's no Uber, not that, no taxi whatnot. So she
Speaker 1: would where would you go, literally just to Wilber's a
Speaker 1: bag that I do? You also want to say, the
Speaker 1: only Uber I've ever seen available in little Compton, for
Speaker 1: it takes forty five minutes to get there. Be the
Speaker 1: only option is uber pet every time your dog or yack.
Speaker 1: You don't have just a dog, you have a yack,
Speaker 1: you've got chickens. There's a chicken. So this woman would
Speaker 1: hang out. She'd order groceries, but she couldn't bring them
Speaker 1: home because it's also way too far. Everybody lives miles away.
Speaker 1: So she would have like some of the local teens,
Speaker 1: these boys like these like teenage boys, college boys, They
Speaker 1: would get hired to drive the groceries. To her house
Speaker 1: shout out no autographs. She would then proceed you shout
Speaker 1: it out your own podcast. She's shut out her energy.
Speaker 1: No autographs please. She would literally be buck naked answering
Speaker 1: the door in like a like a robe or like
Speaker 1: a full She would greet them like hello, hello young man,
Speaker 1: like college boy. That isn't the delusion of she would
Speaker 1: like greet them. That's right. She had. She had a
Speaker 1: corn cob pipe, no teeth, and and everybody knew if
Speaker 1: you get said groceries, that's a real no autographs please.
Speaker 1: Energy wonderful, isn't it. Well, yeah, I guess my hometown. Yeah, um,
Speaker 1: a person who was bold, say the least. And one
Speaker 1: year she sent Christmas cards to everyone in the neighborhood.
Speaker 1: That's nice, that's very nice. Everybody loves christ very sweet.
Speaker 1: So far I loved, I love thought. It was like
Speaker 1: a green card with a gold wreath on the front. Gorgeous.
Speaker 1: And it said in her script, go to hell? Did
Speaker 1: she haven't printed up? And I wrote it in her intent? Wow? Yeah,
Speaker 1: was there a message that everyone got one? I knew
Speaker 1: you would like it. I told you you were gonna
Speaker 1: like it. I told you you were gonna like I
Speaker 1: told you all about that. He is everything. It is
Speaker 1: very confident. We never I gotta say, because you're from Yeah,
Speaker 1: little little content Texas doesn't have that sass. It would
Speaker 1: just it would be like bless your heart or something. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know underneath I feel like it has weight because
Speaker 1: that is like this was sort of like shocking and
Speaker 1: kind of hilarious. That is fabulous. Yeah. The real names
Speaker 1: of both of these women I know, and they're incredible.
Speaker 1: I have one hometown hero of talking tact to me.
Speaker 1: She was my sex sad teacher. Wow, already personal over
Speaker 1: explain no, And she would always and the class would
Speaker 1: like sort of snicker when she said it, but she
Speaker 1: only said she pronounced it mature, which truly makes me sick.
Speaker 1: Mind too. Maturity, I said, puberty. And she would also say,
Speaker 1: and ladies, as you developed a boozem want to laugh.
Speaker 1: It's like she said, home going like ha ha, I
Speaker 1: said booze. I said mature, pubic care puobis pub Yeah,
Speaker 1: pubs poobs. And then she would also she taught us
Speaker 1: about golden showers and she said, she said, quote now
Speaker 1: again this is back in the day. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: of course, and this is Massachusetts. Yeah, she said, some
Speaker 1: homosexuals are aroused by your nat and on one another.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, No, I had not held hands with
Speaker 1: the boy. I want that on a belt. And she
Speaker 1: taught us about Cleveland Steamers and I didn't And then
Speaker 1: and I had to actually confirm I not. I'd not
Speaker 1: even held hands with the boy. Why is she jumping
Speaker 1: ahead of like explaining the pieces of a body. Let's
Speaker 1: just understand why not. Um My teacher was um definitely
Speaker 1: like a kind of butch lesbian in retrospecture we didn't
Speaker 1: catch by the way, okay, my smelled like tuna ficient
Speaker 1: and cigarettes. She was really like kind of like hardcore
Speaker 1: like person like just kind of like an intense, strong
Speaker 1: energy to her. And she had these two big dogs
Speaker 1: that she called bitches because they were female people. There
Speaker 1: was a it's always dog like dog breeders or people
Speaker 1: like that. Yeah, bitches. Yeah, okay, that is so. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a lot. It's a journey. Will you before we
Speaker 1: sign off, will you give a shout out to the
Speaker 1: hero at the dump when you add another Little Compton
Speaker 1: hero when you tried to find up the schedule, I
Speaker 1: went to the Little Compton Dump, but if you don't
Speaker 1: know is I'm gonna compare it to um whatever. Not
Speaker 1: scary farm is in the rest of the year, not
Speaker 1: Sparry Farm. Yeah. Yeah, So so the dump is like
Speaker 1: a great place to go. Yes, it's really. It's so fun.
Speaker 1: You didn't get to go, it's really fred get picked
Speaker 1: through the ship. You know, you have to drive and
Speaker 1: you're literally like driving on like a roller clip. So fine.
Speaker 1: If you've never been to a small town dump, you
Speaker 1: because you want. Yeah, you've been to the dump? Will
Speaker 1: you can you? This is our producer, doctor Banana. Doctor
Speaker 1: Bananna is doesn't take staying in Little Compton before you
Speaker 1: end up at the dump because I stay there because
Speaker 1: we had an airbnb so we didn't have to deal
Speaker 1: with our own trash. We didn't have to do and
Speaker 1: actually got lucky. Yeah trash. Oh no, you didn't get lucky.
Speaker 1: We were lucky. And what were your thoughts on the dump?
Speaker 1: It was great. I love the sort of organizational sort
Speaker 1: of structure they have going on there. It feels like
Speaker 1: a ride. It's not very fun. Run into people. You
Speaker 1: can have small talk. People leave out things, items, they
Speaker 1: leave out chair, you can like you can't find something good.
Speaker 1: You can find something good. Okay, awesome, So, Brian, we
Speaker 1: love the Dump. I love them. First of all, I
Speaker 1: got I was a celebrity at the domp. You were
Speaker 1: because you ran into someone with a very very fun
Speaker 1: name to say, if you're from Rhode. He popped out
Speaker 1: of the pop and he said, what did you hear
Speaker 1: your friend? What? He says? It's San Martin. Yeah, we
Speaker 1: went to school together. Yeah, obsessed, Ada and Sean Martin.
Speaker 1: There's a two three great names to stay from d
Speaker 1: I love it. Okay. So then you have to find
Speaker 1: out if we could bring the trash to the Dom.
Speaker 1: I was tasked with the responsibility and I drove tourists.
Speaker 1: I think we had rented yeah, And I went to
Speaker 1: the jackazard and said, you've got to find out if
Speaker 1: they're open on Sunday. You gotta rent a tourists. You've
Speaker 1: got it, You've got to rent. I drive to the
Speaker 1: Dom and I asked the guy, are you guys open
Speaker 1: on Sundays. He looks at me like I have just
Speaker 1: absolutely taken a frying pan and smashed it on space
Speaker 1: and he goes, Sundays, Now, we're not open on Sundays.
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, okay. I just wasn't sure.
Speaker 1: He goes, and we're not open on Wednesdays, and I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, okay, cool, So now I know. He's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: we're not upen Wednesdays or Sundays. Got it, okay? And
Speaker 1: he goes, yeah, we're not up on Wednesdays, but we're
Speaker 1: not up in Sundays. So the way you can remember it,
Speaker 1: and I must have for sure this is imprinted on me,
Speaker 1: is he like Wednesday is the day when like normally
Speaker 1: people aren't closed. Yeah, Sunday everyone's closed, so it's like
Speaker 1: one for another. And I was like, I love this
Speaker 1: neumonic No, this is like this is amazing because I
Speaker 1: will make up mnemonic devices that make no sense like this. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and then like I will that's how I remember where
Speaker 1: I parked or whatever. Like I'll be like, right, so
Speaker 1: if I park on like three B, I'll be like
Speaker 1: three B or not three B. But I'm like, that's
Speaker 1: not helpful because it makes you want to think to
Speaker 1: be or not to be. Yeah, but then you're like
Speaker 1: it's not, it's not it's the one that's not to be.
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, I love that. Yeah. Well he was
Speaker 1: a delight and like you said, Lauren, I will I
Speaker 1: will never forget it. I love him Now Art and
Speaker 1: I are going on a first date. Now everyone knows
Speaker 1: everyone now, everyone legendarily knows. Everyone knows. We go on
Speaker 1: a first date every week and we use lines in
Speaker 1: this improv for the first date that people have sent
Speaker 1: in that are the worst lines that they ever heard
Speaker 1: on the worst thing they were ever told on a
Speaker 1: day's real lines that we're the worst one, lines that
Speaker 1: were said, taken out of context and really not fake ones.
Speaker 1: We want the real and you can either you can
Speaker 1: either tweet to us at Arta Marine m y r
Speaker 1: N or at Brian Sofie don't tag both of us
Speaker 1: because we don't want to see each other, or you
Speaker 1: can email us at naps pod one at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: We just need to hear the number one number, the
Speaker 1: number one. Yeah. We we just need the single line
Speaker 1: out of context that we said and we if we
Speaker 1: use it, we'll give you credit on air and um
Speaker 1: and we're going to incorporate it. Lauren will be joining
Speaker 1: in on our bad day anytime before we say the line,
Speaker 1: we're gonna if it's a if it's coming up. That
Speaker 1: was a real thing that was emailed or tweeted it.
Speaker 1: You're gonna hear a bill like that, just like that.
Speaker 1: It's a real bell I bought. I bought a hotel bell.
Speaker 1: I bought a bell hop ball. I know, I want
Speaker 1: to go get the lug edge. Yeah, go get it,
Speaker 1: go get it, go get it? Is it? You know what?
Speaker 1: Let me explain inv Oh yeah, I keep the ball
Speaker 1: in the air, babe. Wow wow wow okaya questions? Yes,
Speaker 1: technically do I need to put my microphone to the
Speaker 1: bell or just hit it? Okay? When we come back,
Speaker 1: we will be having a date at the cheesecake factory.
Speaker 1: We take you to the cheesecake factory where our date
Speaker 1: is in progress. Hey, you're a hummer Dannyka Trimble. Yeah, yes,
Speaker 1: oh you must be a keer el. It's actually Keen.
Speaker 1: Oh you're key, I'm Keen Alex ki e a E
Speaker 1: n well k e A Okay wait kay, So what's
Speaker 1: it like to work for a dying company? Okay, that's
Speaker 1: a little rude. I mean, I'm sorry, I'm just curious.
Speaker 1: You know, M'm just trying to get Circuit City off
Speaker 1: the ground. Oh look, Circuit City is not necessarily dying. Sure,
Speaker 1: we're no best buy. But I mean, what's it like? Uh,
Speaker 1: you know, I gotta be honest with you. Um, it's
Speaker 1: not my main job. Oh yeah, I mean it's sort
Speaker 1: of a day job. It's sort of a day job.
Speaker 1: You're a dog trainer, aren't you? Are you a dog groover?
Speaker 1: I am a dog I'm a dog trainer and groomer,
Speaker 1: very famously. And also I'm really passionate about cyclist rights
Speaker 1: and fighting for cyclists to get the same respect on
Speaker 1: the roadus drivers. Well, I did notice that you were
Speaker 1: wearing bike shorts with a windbreaker tucked in and a
Speaker 1: mule and I just thought that was a gore. Can
Speaker 1: we get a table here? What's the deal? Yeah? Can
Speaker 1: we get a day? Hi? SORRYO, I just I get
Speaker 1: this library book back by tomorrow. So I was just
Speaker 1: trying to finish it. Okay, this is great expectations? What
Speaker 1: is it? Greg? Expectations? Greg expectations? It's like, is it
Speaker 1: like a young adult version? It's all about Gregg. He's
Speaker 1: got big expectations. I don't think he's ever going to
Speaker 1: see it through. Okay, he has to chart it. He's
Speaker 1: got a got a big he's got a big chest match. Okay,
Speaker 1: chest chest he's got a big chest match chest match. Oh,
Speaker 1: I think it's chess. It's really good at chest. I
Speaker 1: didn't know that, um, teens were still wearing like the
Speaker 1: out of mouth headgear. Oh I'm not a teen, Sorry,
Speaker 1: I miss I mistook that. Okay, um, how old are you?
Speaker 1: That's how old are you? I'm twenty six? Well i'm
Speaker 1: forty two. Ok yeah, yeah, Well you know, at first
Speaker 1: I didn't realize what a big head you have because
Speaker 1: your boobs are so big that it all looks proportional
Speaker 1: that you know what rash? Can I just say I
Speaker 1: appreciate that I'm finally balanced out. I did have some
Speaker 1: surgery to correct I had quite a large chest. Can
Speaker 1: I say something in your defense? Yes, I am not
Speaker 1: interested in dating beautiful people. I prefer interesting looking people,
Speaker 1: well like you. Well, I want you to know, in
Speaker 1: retaliation to that, I just checked out every single guy here.
Speaker 1: You're the hottest. You're kidding, Yes, you check them up.
Speaker 1: This guy made me watch a video of him winning
Speaker 1: a foot race against his co worker in their office
Speaker 1: building that day, and he kept your playing it and
Speaker 1: got so stoked about himself that he got a boner. Wait,
Speaker 1: I didn't this guy made me watch a video of
Speaker 1: him winning a foot race against his co worker in
Speaker 1: their office building that day, and he kept replaying it
Speaker 1: and got so stoked about himself that he got a boner.
Speaker 1: Can I just say that I understand at Circuit City
Speaker 1: in order. Yeah, it's a dying company, okay, keen, But
Speaker 1: when I choose to keep them morale up. I am
Speaker 1: as stant manager. I'm very proud of that. It's not
Speaker 1: my main goal in life, but you've got to have
Speaker 1: We've got Circuit City Olympics, You've got we compete against
Speaker 1: other We have intramurals against other Circuit Cities, team building.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I didn't mean for the question to be
Speaker 1: so antagonist. If people are running too slowly and getting
Speaker 1: in my way during a race, he'll elbow them so
Speaker 1: they falled down. Would you know what? Okay, do we
Speaker 1: get a buzzer thing that we can hang out? You
Speaker 1: can hold out the page, just kind of put you
Speaker 1: in the system. The last name is tremble Dash Alex
Speaker 1: tremble A. People. That's if we get married. If she
Speaker 1: and I get married, that's going to be our Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm going to take her second. So your last name
Speaker 1: is Alex. Yeah, my name is Keena. I'm going to
Speaker 1: tell you something. People get abducted and taken away from
Speaker 1: the things that they are the most familiar with in
Speaker 1: their lives. What do you mean. I'm just saying that
Speaker 1: every day a tragedy happens. Okay, and here I remember
Speaker 1: now why I don't eat oysters. You know what? Can
Speaker 1: you seem like someone who would like renaissance fars? I
Speaker 1: love them. I actually used to work at one braiding
Speaker 1: women's hair. Women's just the name is Trimble Dash Alex.
Speaker 1: Table for two table, I already put it in. And
Speaker 1: you're in the system here where this buzz is you're
Speaker 1: I mean, do you want to just come back to
Speaker 1: my place and see my summer city? Oh? Yes, fun, Okay,
Speaker 1: that's give it to me. You know, I work in
Speaker 1: I work at an electronic store. I sell in Texas instruments. Oh,
Speaker 1: and I gotta say this buzz. It's like you came
Speaker 1: in and fronted at me about Circus City and you
Speaker 1: work at Texas and oh I was trying to relate
Speaker 1: to you your table. I'm also your server, all right,
Speaker 1: table for two, not at the bar in a booth
Speaker 1: and not sitting next to either end. I only serve
Speaker 1: at the bar. Thank you, Todd. Well, I'll get you.
Speaker 1: I'll get you. I'll get you, Thank you, Ted, Thank you. Listen.
Speaker 1: I don't know if this is too forward. Hi just sit,
Speaker 1: don't right over here, and then I'll be right. Thank you. Kimberly, Kimberly,
Speaker 1: I have to be honest, Kimberly. I need a menu
Speaker 1: that's the size of a binder. Can you make that happen?
Speaker 1: Do you always wear glasses because my ex husband wore glasses.
Speaker 1: You know what, I'm gonna get to that menu right now.
Speaker 1: It's clear you're not over your ex based on how
Speaker 1: much you've talked about him. I've said one thing. I've
Speaker 1: said one thing. All I'm saying is move on. Okay. Look,
Speaker 1: did I finish my abduction story? Oh no, Okay, here
Speaker 1: we go, Kimberly. I don't think it was to me. Kimberly,
Speaker 1: can I tell you my abduction? I'd like to hear it.
Speaker 1: People are taken all the time, do you know what
Speaker 1: I mean? And given gone to second locations? Then if
Speaker 1: they don't never get to a second location, happened to me?
Speaker 1: You were taking to a second location? Yeah? Well, he
Speaker 1: young zipped his jeans like back on the bad and said,
Speaker 1: but the buffet is open, and I know you can eat. Wait?
Speaker 1: What are you smiling? Worried? Makes me smile? Wow, Kimberly,
Speaker 1: are you okay? Listen, guys, I'm a cop. I'm a cop.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I didn't. I didn't look. I just not.
Speaker 1: I told you it wasn't my main thing. You know.
Speaker 1: I'm a cop. I'm a cop. So sorry, can you
Speaker 1: just order now? I'll have a check. Did the explosion salad? Okay,
Speaker 1: I'll have the five thousand calories? Okay from a cop.
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter. I know, cops don't matter who I
Speaker 1: don't know. I meant cops don't. Listen. Here's what I
Speaker 1: would like. And I need you to take pen to paper.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, I don't. I can do it all up here.
Speaker 1: I guarantee you can't. But here we go. Boy, I
Speaker 1: need clam millionaires. I'm gonna make a nomnic device in
Speaker 1: my head to me. I need chin oh dente. I
Speaker 1: need your very international Italian fish. Okay, so can you
Speaker 1: repeat that back to me clam today, yes, fit to
Speaker 1: ch clem don't help me, okay, but to cheen al dente.
Speaker 1: Uh huh, Kimberly and an Italian fish. Whoa, I'm going
Speaker 1: to Milan. In the South they cook at the olive oil,
Speaker 1: which comes from olives, and in the North they cook
Speaker 1: with butter, which comes from I don't know, chickens. Okay, um,
Speaker 1: I'll be right back with those that you know what.
Speaker 1: It's all frozen and we just kind of yours is already.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it'll just be ready in two seconds, honestly,
Speaker 1: because I have to tell you if something is not
Speaker 1: deep frozen. Yeah, and if something is not something I
Speaker 1: could recognize in a heartbeat for a freezer door. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: this shug or would you call myself? Huh, isn't appetized? No,
Speaker 1: I remember why I don't eat oysters. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: do you know what an oysters either? Kimberly, I don't
Speaker 1: know who else doesn't? Well? Um, Todd, where is Todd?
Speaker 1: Tore you cooking me? Todd? You at Pejoria? Are you
Speaker 1: all right? Oh my god? Are you right? I'm fine?
Speaker 1: I was falling. How old are you now? I'm ninety?
Speaker 1: Nut Todd, you're spill some jelly on your shirt. Let
Speaker 1: me lick it off. It's not jelly, but you can
Speaker 1: lick it, okay a little. I feel like I'm having
Speaker 1: dinner with my dad. You remind me my sister. I
Speaker 1: really wanted to date your best friend, but since he
Speaker 1: has a girlfriend, I asked you out. God, I didn't know, Listen,
Speaker 1: I didn't know how to ask you out. Like I know,
Speaker 1: I know that Mary thought we might have something in common.
Speaker 1: Did because it because we because we're both interested in
Speaker 1: fan fiction. But I just need you to know I
Speaker 1: remember heard. I need you to know that I've reevaluated
Speaker 1: my life and I now believe anyone who reads fan
Speaker 1: fiction must be a pedophile. So since you do, I'm
Speaker 1: concerned that this won't work out. You need to make
Speaker 1: more money here city. I'm gonna get a pencheon you
Speaker 1: know what, money I'll never forget what Mary told me
Speaker 1: when she talked to me about you. Well, let's cut two, okay,
Speaker 1: I Mary, Oh my god, I have the best woman
Speaker 1: to set you up, can't. You aren't like a prophet
Speaker 1: when it comes to I just I have a crystal
Speaker 1: ball that I look into, and I just know who
Speaker 1: the perfect matches. Right here, I see it. It looks
Speaker 1: like the wonderful Emerald City, Wizard of Oz, we've got
Speaker 1: walking down the yellow Brick Road. It's the perfect woman
Speaker 1: for you, Dorothy, No, silly, it's a metaphor. Okay, but
Speaker 1: she did get her slippers off a dead witch. Shit, Okay,
Speaker 1: cut to Okay, listen, I m Mary, I just I'm
Speaker 1: really lonely. I know I do not want to be
Speaker 1: with somebody the worst glasses. You know that my ex
Speaker 1: has been more glasses. I never want to hear about
Speaker 1: him again. I mean, listen, he was weak, he had
Speaker 1: no upper body straight well, he and his glasses obviously
Speaker 1: couldn't see for ship. He couldn't head eyes. That jeans
Speaker 1: anybody in my crystal ball, with which I only need
Speaker 1: one eye open, I see the perfect guy. He's a
Speaker 1: coward line with the heart of the tin man. Mary.
Speaker 1: Cut to Mary, can I ask you a question, of course, sweetie,
Speaker 1: who is she supposed to be in this metaphor Wizard
Speaker 1: of Oz? So, okay, there's this character that we don't
Speaker 1: see much of in the original film. Who kind of
Speaker 1: we're supposed to be Excuse me, it's supposed to be
Speaker 1: a sorry split screen came together. Hi hi, Hi, I
Speaker 1: am I am tremble by your last name family, I
Speaker 1: go by Tremble. When you're a cop, you want to
Speaker 1: blend in as a lady cop slash circuit titty employee.
Speaker 1: But I don't know, can I? Um? I just I
Speaker 1: really like for you to read my novel and give
Speaker 1: me feedback. Cut back to the cheesecake factory. Do you
Speaker 1: remember how we used to get along when we met
Speaker 1: by accident? We met on that split screen. That was
Speaker 1: so cute watching that flashback. Yeah, you liked it. I
Speaker 1: loved it. Kimberly, Okay, Kimberly, don't come in on my date. Okay,
Speaker 1: what can I just give you the best line? If
Speaker 1: you guys do end up going up, can you can
Speaker 1: we have a girl moment? Yeah? If you guys do
Speaker 1: you end up going home to cover? Yeah, let's just
Speaker 1: give you the perfect thing to say here. It's just
Speaker 1: like this guy send this to me once. I'm like what,
Speaker 1: it felt really good? Yeah, I'm gonna try it. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna try it on. It was amazing, Okay, let's hear it. Okay,
Speaker 1: so I guess it's something he actually should be a
Speaker 1: guy moment aside. Yeah, wait, you want to just come here? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 1: just keep your hands busy tremble, so like what you
Speaker 1: need to say, like if you kind of want her
Speaker 1: to like go down. Oh you know someone went down
Speaker 1: on me once in Baowolf of the movie. Okay, Well
Speaker 1: you kind of get her in your room into like
Speaker 1: you know, a position. Okay, and you say, let's put
Speaker 1: those clarinet skills to use in the bedroom of your heart.
Speaker 1: You cut yours apart. Hey, where's your sim city? I
Speaker 1: thought we were here to look at your sim city.
Speaker 1: I know it's in the other room, but I have
Speaker 1: to tell you before we get into my dick has
Speaker 1: two wholes. One word supposed to be in them, one
Speaker 1: other time like a blowhole annoys. You see that Pinocchio
Speaker 1: with the it made annoise. It does make a noise
Speaker 1: um when you blow on it. Have you ever been
Speaker 1: to the symphony? No? Cut to the symphony is a symphony?
Speaker 1: I know. Do you want to meet the clarinet player?
Speaker 1: I love the clarinet Sarah. Sorry, didn't mean to scrape by.
Speaker 1: Sorry Sarah, my dearest heart. Yes, yes, we're on our
Speaker 1: third day. Never met a clarinet player, and I was
Speaker 1: wondering if you could, how do you perform it? Like? What? What? What?
Speaker 1: Is that your process. You have to put a read
Speaker 1: on it a ring if you blow on it? Is
Speaker 1: that funny? I know you'd love, isn't she funny? So
Speaker 1: you suck on your read and then you slap it
Speaker 1: on in the clarinet up in the base. I feel
Speaker 1: like you guys are how do you know each other?
Speaker 1: We were adopted together at the same time. And then
Speaker 1: she started going down on me. No blood. But what
Speaker 1: I want you to explain to her is how my
Speaker 1: dick has the two holes? Oh I cannot okay, it's
Speaker 1: like you know, so it actually makes soup. I took
Speaker 1: it to a bad place. Whatever. Truth the truth. So anyways,
Speaker 1: so um as you can see him an amazing clarinet player,
Speaker 1: yeah obviously, and he has a wenee that looks like
Speaker 1: a clarinet kind of one that's not finished really if
Speaker 1: you're being honest, because it does only has one hole
Speaker 1: on the top and one at the top other top
Speaker 1: on the top, one on the top o, yeah, and
Speaker 1: then one on the other top. Yeah it's the top top. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but it's not really that I don't know. So anyways,
Speaker 1: bub trap is uh huh. You got to put the
Speaker 1: finger on the home and that's how you make this sound. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel like this is a kind of an elaborate
Speaker 1: way to get me. Yeah. Do you want to take
Speaker 1: an express train down to do wear a Candy Land?
Speaker 1: Are you? Are you your k I grew up having
Speaker 1: sex in your Oh I've never encountered a woman with
Speaker 1: zero vulnerability? Who meet Danika Tremble. Wow. Well, listen, guys,
Speaker 1: the world is not a safe space. Okay, we are
Speaker 1: all I am a cop, I'm a cop, and we
Speaker 1: are all threatened. And look, I don't don't make me
Speaker 1: say this, but well I don't use them regularly. I
Speaker 1: am hanging on to some automatic weapons because they are
Speaker 1: going to be worth a lot of money once they
Speaker 1: get bailed. Yeah, so you're sitting on a gold mine.
Speaker 1: I'm sitting on a gold mine. Do I need vulnerability? No? Well,
Speaker 1: now that you mentioned that, would you mind co signing
Speaker 1: an apartment for my ax? Already sort of told him
Speaker 1: that you and I figured that the one that I
Speaker 1: wanted to go out with. Yeah, sorry, I towards the valet.
Speaker 1: Oh shortcase, got Symphony's over, Symphony's over, back to cheesecake battery? Wow, Todd, Yeah, Kimberly, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Danica Tremble. I wanted, Actually, I don't even know why
Speaker 1: I called out Tom and Todd and Kimberly. Absolutely nothing
Speaker 1: to say to you except that this took a lot
Speaker 1: of effort to get a table. Okay, and you will
Speaker 1: be hearing about it now. I remember why I don't
Speaker 1: needt a oyster, Danica. I know we've had a really
Speaker 1: really rocky, really rock house the future. You insulting my
Speaker 1: electronics career when yours is worse than mine. You're right,
Speaker 1: and I realized I probably needed to get a little
Speaker 1: bit more humble. I was wondering if maybe you'd want
Speaker 1: to do this, Like, can I just say I really
Speaker 1: like a bad boy and I like somebody that makes
Speaker 1: me question, like am I am? I up? Oh? Your bill?
Speaker 1: Sorry it hasn't been hey. I didn't mean to interrupt.
Speaker 1: It seemed like maybe you guys are gonna kiss. But
Speaker 1: I just wanted to say I can pay for dinner.
Speaker 1: I accuse these guys who are bullies to me in
Speaker 1: high school beating me up a year ago, and I
Speaker 1: got a bunch of money in the settlement because I'm
Speaker 1: a really good liar. Wow. I just wanted to say
Speaker 1: that I got your dinner. Thank you on them. It
Speaker 1: will be back. Yeah. So that means like we don't
Speaker 1: even a tip or anything, right, No, I don't even
Speaker 1: want one. I'd be offended. You say, tell me, I
Speaker 1: feel seen by you. I'm gonna write about you in
Speaker 1: my next move. I'd love for you to paint me.
Speaker 1: I'm like a portrait of man, like just like we're
Speaker 1: Jack and Rose. Yeah, but you're a Rose and I'm Jack.
Speaker 1: I'd love her. And then I can have your steamy
Speaker 1: hand in the back of my car. Absolutely, my bed
Speaker 1: is a door that will work perfectly. I'm sorry. What well?
Speaker 1: Whatever was it a door? What they hey, Todd? What
Speaker 1: they float on? And Titanic they flew flew on a door? Okay?
Speaker 1: He said. The Titanic was about the Titanic. It was
Speaker 1: ship that went down, which is the way he wants
Speaker 1: me to go. Well, was the last time I thought
Speaker 1: about that? I I I got this toime. You got
Speaker 1: a Todd is nine to five, the Dabney Coleman movie. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: we got it. I'm going home with you. Oh, come
Speaker 1: home and we're back, Lauren. You know, we're trying to
Speaker 1: become lifestyle influencers. So we'd like to recap the date
Speaker 1: with you talk about your beauty routine. But first and foremost,
Speaker 1: we're going to make you the most healthy dessert with
Speaker 1: pin peep Fit. Do you know of pep Fit? Do
Speaker 1: you know about peanut I don't, but I'm happy to
Speaker 1: be sponsored by them. It's powdered peanut butter. And what
Speaker 1: it is is it's dehydrate peanuts. So you know how
Speaker 1: for instance, peanut butter has four thousand calories and seven
Speaker 1: fatal so this has seventy calorie, seventy calorie and it's
Speaker 1: it's basically just dehydrated peanuts. Okay, you mix this with water,
Speaker 1: it turns into peanut butter. Yes, you mix this with
Speaker 1: an Are you vegan? No? Are you vegan? Are you?
Speaker 1: Are you crawl Sagan? Then we're gonna make you a
Speaker 1: delicious cake that you can make in the microwave. It
Speaker 1: only takes a few minutes and by the way, it's
Speaker 1: legit good. Well, I'm really excited. I also did bring
Speaker 1: my finishing touches. What did you? What did you bring
Speaker 1: the something? What are we waking? Because we also want
Speaker 1: our listeners to send us recipes. Oh that that's going
Speaker 1: to be true. What is it is an unreal dark
Speaker 1: chocolate peanut gem, which is basically just a peanut with
Speaker 1: chocolate around it and a hard candy shell. That it's
Speaker 1: certified vegan, sortified, gluten free, sort of fighting on fair
Speaker 1: trade ingredients, color by vegeos NOD and sustainable ingredients aka disgusting. No,
Speaker 1: it's really okay. So what we're putting in right now
Speaker 1: for our viewers at home, what are we training right
Speaker 1: what we're going to do our bass, which is we're
Speaker 1: going to do two tablespoons of peanut butter powder. Okay.
Speaker 1: I love your kitchen. This is our gorgeous kitchen. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we do. We mix it. It's like a pumpkin pie, Laura.
Speaker 1: You want to do sort of equal parts pumpkin exactly,
Speaker 1: and this is pure pumpkin. Okay. Last week we I
Speaker 1: made the error. I really screwed the pooch at the
Speaker 1: store I got. I got pumpkin pie, but it was tasted,
Speaker 1: it was good. I'm glad you go to right this
Speaker 1: and then we're gonna put in and then you mix
Speaker 1: with an egg. Here's the egg. Okay, Now, Lauren, I
Speaker 1: want to combine these first two things. First, I love this.
Speaker 1: This is the part of the recipe I called first
Speaker 1: things first. First things first, uh huh. So you do
Speaker 1: a bunch of stuff, then you say first things first.
Speaker 1: That's right. Do you want cocoa powder or any you
Speaker 1: want to make it? Chocolate? Of course, obviously I'm a
Speaker 1: chocolate So today we have Hershey's Coco unsweetened coco. Now
Speaker 1: you're not a Stevia Gale, but I have some drops
Speaker 1: of vanilla Stevia if you want to have, which is awesome.
Speaker 1: I don't think I need that. There's gonna be enough
Speaker 1: going on. We'll put in your well, put in your
Speaker 1: chocolate in. Yes, and how confident? How many smart? Just
Speaker 1: we have some so we're gonna show the audience. We're
Speaker 1: putting those in. Gim Donny gems. This is going to
Speaker 1: be a peanut butter chocolate here, Yeah, putting it in.
Speaker 1: I'm putting it in now. Lauren, what is your beauty regiment?
Speaker 1: You're a very gorgeous galahounded by the press? What are
Speaker 1: We recently did a makeup lesson with our friend Michael
Speaker 1: Duquet and what did you learn? Because I feel like
Speaker 1: we learned so much from Michael. What did you learn?
Speaker 1: Shout out to Michael. So, I've basically been doing the
Speaker 1: same routine for many years at this point, you know,
Speaker 1: is that just your idea? Huh? Is that your idea?
Speaker 1: Or that was that's You're the best person ever. You're
Speaker 1: in the best person ever. Mug. I just love you
Speaker 1: said you want to episode? I don't know, let's throw
Speaker 1: it in there few minutes. Okay, Wow, what a fun
Speaker 1: retro looking microt. Thank you. Okay, So tell me who
Speaker 1: is this Mike Duquette. So Michael duquet not Mike Michael.
Speaker 1: Excuse me. He's our makeup artist who we love, and
Speaker 1: he's done us for many events and everything happening over there.
Speaker 1: It doesn't seem to know how to do more than
Speaker 1: like ten seconds and started. I think you might know how. Okay,
Speaker 1: I don't know how. I don't know. So Michael is
Speaker 1: an amazing makeup artist, yes, and he we had a
Speaker 1: makeup lesson with him. We did, and it was so
Speaker 1: great because I think, you know, if you wear makeup
Speaker 1: every day, you tend to kind of get in the
Speaker 1: same routine, that's right, and it's just easy you kind
Speaker 1: of slap it on, that's right. I learned a lot
Speaker 1: of tips what did you learn so like the style
Speaker 1: changes over the years. Yeah, tips change, people do. One
Speaker 1: thing he taught me that I loved was to put
Speaker 1: on your highlighter here before your foundation. She's pointing if
Speaker 1: you're just listening at home, it's a cheek bone area.
Speaker 1: It's like it's like your unders and he do you
Speaker 1: use like a liquid highlighter. It's like a liquid high
Speaker 1: foundation over it. So there's like actually a pop happening on.
Speaker 1: I don't have an on right now. I have it
Speaker 1: on and you sort of push it in with your fingers.
Speaker 1: You push it in and it creates a great um
Speaker 1: line here. Now I don't have it on right now,
Speaker 1: I judge I have it. I have it on. Um.
Speaker 1: I did have half version of what he taught us,
Speaker 1: But he also was teaching me about shading my eyelid
Speaker 1: area in the in the what do you call it
Speaker 1: the crease crease, and then doing another color on top.
Speaker 1: But it's the darker in the crease. I always just
Speaker 1: like one color. So he had us to the darker
Speaker 1: in the crease and then the lighter kind of up
Speaker 1: on the brow bow, which I have on an eyeliner
Speaker 1: on top. And then he also had us. Then he
Speaker 1: had us push the foundation in and use a face
Speaker 1: oil rather than a moisturizer. Well, there's also an amnic
Speaker 1: device to remember the order of your kidding oil, moisturizer, sunscreen.
Speaker 1: That's just for why do you put oil on? Because
Speaker 1: And then he also taught us to put the bronzer
Speaker 1: at the end and you can. And we also used
Speaker 1: the same brush for everything. So that was interesting because
Speaker 1: I felt like you had to just have like a
Speaker 1: thousands been bouncing ground with brushes. I haven't done that,
Speaker 1: but I like it. And that you come down you
Speaker 1: put a little bit of because because now the Instagram look,
Speaker 1: the TikTok look is a little more like there's a
Speaker 1: little more contour. So there's a little bit of bronzer
Speaker 1: up by the hairline and then coming down sort of
Speaker 1: the cheek on like under my, my, my, My tree
Speaker 1: is good. It's ready, should be ready. I feel like
Speaker 1: it's ready. I think this should be careful. This looks good.
Speaker 1: I see that. I see the china. Let's stir it.
Speaker 1: Do you see the uncut dumbs? Okay, so it's a
Speaker 1: cake texture. It's like a pudding. Okay, it's like a
Speaker 1: hot it's like a it's like a hot it's like
Speaker 1: a molten lava cake. I'm very excited. Did you make
Speaker 1: up this recipe? We did, sort of you because we're
Speaker 1: vain and we like cocoa. Make it in there? No,
Speaker 1: should we could put someone now, let's stir it in. No,
Speaker 1: we don't listen to our guests. She did, she did,
Speaker 1: she did, We didn't. Let's stir it. That's okay. We
Speaker 1: don't listen to our guests. That's okay. It should have
Speaker 1: been now. Oh, it looks really good right by the way,
Speaker 1: don't you want it a little? You want a little
Speaker 1: vaniah Stevia. Let's put a drop in? Good? Honestly does Honestly?
Speaker 1: I think I could get myself in front of the TV.
Speaker 1: One little drop, one little dropetop doesn't want it. It
Speaker 1: doesn't sweet enough. Let me test that to be sure.
Speaker 1: No no, no, no, no no no no no, it's
Speaker 1: gonna be hot. We also eat it with you. Okay, good.
Speaker 1: I want it sweeter, but that's just me. I'm a monster.
Speaker 1: I think we shouldn't put egg in it anymore. Not
Speaker 1: the egg. No, No, I think that's it because I
Speaker 1: think it just scrambles the No, I don't think we
Speaker 1: should do that. I don't think this is very good enough.
Speaker 1: I don't know if you have a cras they had
Speaker 1: a sweet one. I think it would it taste like
Speaker 1: to me. I think we did it wrong. Tastes like
Speaker 1: a sweet potato. I haven't what's wrong with that? Well,
Speaker 1: it shouldn't be that. I think it tastes better with
Speaker 1: the vanilla tea. Let me get some chocolate on it
Speaker 1: next time. I'm not gonna do the egg and I
Speaker 1: might have put too much pumpkin on this one. You
Speaker 1: put a lot of pumping. It's better with a sweeten RM.
Speaker 1: I'm not getting any peanut butter. Gonna be honest, guys,
Speaker 1: I love it, honestly, Anna, I know want some Anna
Speaker 1: get a spoon? I know you want something. I mean, look,
Speaker 1: I honestly would just tell you you don't need to
Speaker 1: try it. I don't mean to be rude. No, you're wrong,
Speaker 1: don't what are you talking about? You're wrong? Then? What
Speaker 1: do you mean to be? It's not enough. It's too
Speaker 1: much pumpkin. There's too much pumpkin. It's not enough peanut butter.
Speaker 1: Anna get a spoon. Ana, one has to try it.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have a couple. Um, go grab one inside.
Speaker 1: You guys are great. I love you guys. That's just
Speaker 1: not my favorite dessert. Anna. You can see I'll be honest,
Speaker 1: Like you saw how you made it right? You want
Speaker 1: to know what it is. I do get a little
Speaker 1: out of it. Get in there? Do you get wild?
Speaker 1: Can you get wild? Well? And all of a sudden
Speaker 1: when people are seeing it, I'm like, I don't likes it.
Speaker 1: I don't like it. Anna, there's too much pumpkin. What's
Speaker 1: wrong with it? Not enough peanut butter? And see the
Speaker 1: powder of the peanut butter in there. Yeah, I didn't
Speaker 1: mix it in. You didn't. I got too excited. Let's
Speaker 1: put more peanut butter in. No, I think we should
Speaker 1: call it. I think I think we should just call it.
Speaker 1: And I think it doesn't help to the eggut like
Speaker 1: I had full egg whites. Oh my god? That good?
Speaker 1: Is it? Yeah? That's good. Arta never eats sweets though, No,
Speaker 1: so she's basically just going like it has sugar. True, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm not even eating the sugar. I'm just eating the
Speaker 1: peanut butter. Let's see now, the extra peanut butter, this
Speaker 1: alone in a cup? Just put it in with water
Speaker 1: and water and then some chocolate. Yes, that's a good.
Speaker 1: And if you just put that with water and put
Speaker 1: little chocolates in it and microwave it, that's better. That's
Speaker 1: better any more peanut butter? I got some. That's good.
Speaker 1: I mean, that's good. Just doesn't really want some unreal
Speaker 1: for I thought that went really good. I said, that
Speaker 1: was delicious, tooling. Where's our final question for you? What's
Speaker 1: your morning routine? You wake up? What are you doing?
Speaker 1: Give us your first hour of life? My morning routine
Speaker 1: is I'm dead asleep. Yeah, I hear my child crying
Speaker 1: yes or saying hi ya, but she's in the other room.
Speaker 1: She got rid of her No, she's in the other room.
Speaker 1: But I can hear going hi hi hi. So then
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, I'm gonna get up now. And then
Speaker 1: I turn off her white noise machine from my phone,
Speaker 1: kind of give her an awareness that someone's going to
Speaker 1: come soon, but it might not be just this. I like, Hi,
Speaker 1: Hi Hi, And then I go in her room and
Speaker 1: get her out of bed, and I get her dressed
Speaker 1: and get her some milk and get her all ready.
Speaker 1: And then I slop around in my pajamas for a
Speaker 1: while and think that I'm like disgusting, And then at
Speaker 1: a certain point, I go, I should take care of
Speaker 1: myself and I put on my clothes. But and then
Speaker 1: I'll make us both breakfast, and we have the same
Speaker 1: breakfast pretty much every day. We each have a scrambled
Speaker 1: egg and we each I'm gonna say egg, and we
Speaker 1: each have a scrambled egg, and we each have a
Speaker 1: piece of toast, and we have fruit. And that's always it.
Speaker 1: That's the first, the first couple hours. How long How
Speaker 1: long into the day are we now, that's we're talking,
Speaker 1: that's eight thirty. How much time to wake up? Wake
Speaker 1: up at seven? Maybe a little earlier? Healthy. Yeah, it's hard.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it takes me like three hours to get out
Speaker 1: of the house. Oh yeah, I'm not going anywhere yet,
Speaker 1: And I don't even look somewhere than like three hours
Speaker 1: and I look good. I'm like three hours and I'm
Speaker 1: out looking and a mess. The earliest we usually leave
Speaker 1: the house will be nine thirty and we're gonna go
Speaker 1: meet someone ten o'clock or go do it makes me
Speaker 1: feel better than other people need as long as I need.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it's a slow process. I sometimes just have
Speaker 1: to really really make sure the sun hits my face
Speaker 1: every day like that is sometimes because sometimes I would
Speaker 1: not do that to honestly, excuse me, I hate no
Speaker 1: people who musifonia. I hate what I'm doing right now
Speaker 1: that if I didn't have her as a giving me
Speaker 1: a guilt trip of getting outside, it would be a
Speaker 1: lot harder for me to get out. Honestly, us playing tennis,
Speaker 1: Brian and I took up tennis. I played it this morning.
Speaker 1: Tennis has been good for me to get some like
Speaker 1: it in my eyes because I get a little weird.
Speaker 1: I love you guys have tennis. I wish that I
Speaker 1: would play tennis, that I can be part of it
Speaker 1: because I'm jealous. But I don't really want to play tennis.
Speaker 1: Sanna plays tennis. But I want you all to have
Speaker 1: your thing, and I think that's fine. Lauren. I both
Speaker 1: love you and also I'm so hurt. Yeah, I'm so hurt.
Speaker 1: I knew something bad was coming. I'm also got to say,
Speaker 1: but the pumpkin, you're truly like one of the top
Speaker 1: funniest people in the world. Oh, I think the same.
Speaker 1: I'm really so happy to be here. You guys are
Speaker 1: my favorite. Lauren. We love you. You are such too good?
Speaker 1: Can I serenade you? Sure? Your friendship means a lot
Speaker 1: to me. I consider you top of the heap. I'm
Speaker 1: gone leave my shoes to you, even though you've got
Speaker 1: bigger feet than me. I love when we go on
Speaker 1: trips and I keep you awake late at night and
Speaker 1: we put on face masks and google sometimes people that
Speaker 1: have caused us bite. What a good song? Yeah, I
Speaker 1: want you to know. Yeah, I'm not snoore man who
Speaker 1: when I'm imploring you to know, you're the girl for me? Wow? Wow,
Speaker 1: you're the one that peace. That's true, That's true. Thank
Speaker 1: you for your money and your words. She lent Brian
Speaker 1: five hundred thousand dollars, Lauren, I don't think I'm gonna
Speaker 1: get back. I feel fine about it, Laurens or anything
Speaker 1: that you would like to promote. Thank you for being
Speaker 1: our second guest. Oh, this was so great. I would
Speaker 1: like to promote my podcast Freedom. Yes. Um, it's a
Speaker 1: fun podcast. Yeah, it's me and Scott Ackerman and Paula
Speaker 1: Tompkins and we share stories from our lives and we
Speaker 1: play a little game at the Nabach episode and it's
Speaker 1: a blast. And did you have more from with us though.
Speaker 1: Oh those snoozers, Why I see them every week? Lauren
Speaker 1: lacks everywhere, please and honestly, it's honestly. I'm only at
Speaker 1: Instagram and Facebook now because I have a public Facebook
Speaker 1: Facebook page, sure, and I deleted Twitter because I want
Speaker 1: to be a little health here in some small way,
Speaker 1: I love it. But on Instagram, I'm speaking and wasting
Speaker 1: our time. On Instagram, Brian and I are gonna be
Speaker 1: tevin all sorts of fun photos because we're going to
Speaker 1: New York City. We're going to ny the Sea. We're
Speaker 1: gonna be there April fourteenth and fifteenth. At April fourteenth
Speaker 1: we're gonna be doing no autographs please, so fun. And
Speaker 1: then April fifteenth, we're gonna be doing my podcast, The
Speaker 1: Bachelor Podcast. Will accept this Rose at the Bellhouse. You
Speaker 1: don't even have to watch the bat short to enjoy it. Absolutely.
Speaker 1: Margaret and Joe from Real Housewives of New Jersey are
Speaker 1: going to perform at the Bellhouse with us, which is huge.
Speaker 1: It's amazing. So to get your tickets at uh I
Speaker 1: guess Rose Podcast dot Vodka and we'll get eventually our
Speaker 1: own website here. Fine, I'm comfortable you can do a
Speaker 1: link tree. You can do it on my Instagram page.
Speaker 1: Dropping piece. Well, I'm gonna tell you I've been enjoying
Speaker 1: this dessert. I am so glad you guys liked it.
Speaker 1: We can't thank you so much. We can't thank you
Speaker 1: enough for being here. This is my you, guys, thank
Speaker 1: you for hiring a sitter. It was a blast into it.
Speaker 1: You're a gift card. I am again. It's seventy five dollars.
Speaker 1: But he could honest make a palette. I could get
Speaker 1: I could get shoes, I could get I could get pants.
Speaker 1: You gotta please put it on something fun. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: get something fun, fun, frivolous, frivolous. Right off to the
Speaker 1: gold mines. Okay, guys, Okay, bye you who are you wearing?
Speaker 1: Will there be pressed? Tone? Yeah? And Bryan, I hearing
Speaker 1: last there be And they've got lots of Bodecast. But honey, no, no,
Speaker 1: no noes. We're leaving the Gramma life like celebrities and
Speaker 1: sharing my favorite baby bit restiprees. But no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no hograph, no noograph. Thanks listening to autographs please. Our
Speaker 1: producers are anajos Ni, Katie Levine, Engineer Mark Riversitter song,
Speaker 1: And to all the people that tweeted in these are
Speaker 1: the actual things. Have you heard a line? These are
Speaker 1: people that tweeted to us. These are the brilliant people
Speaker 1: who knew gold when they heard a Christia Jean Tore
Speaker 1: Bartow at Rambling Kite, Jennifer Brown JJB nine seventy. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna read for some of the ones Lawrence said, and
Speaker 1: that I said so Mimi eight three to eight at
Speaker 1: Dee Bird, Ryan Willison Schmidt, the Fan, j Blazing, Jeremy Rees, Horseman,
Speaker 1: Bronte Rose sixty nine. This me there at Jay Cozy,
Speaker 1: I've got Lacey Fallen, Bastaard, David Messiah, Monkey Sarah I
Speaker 1: d h missus al A Low Russo Poo poo pep
Speaker 1: sixty eight at Pond, said Lucy Lawless, Katie Letsie, who
Speaker 1: did the iconic Oysters line, the Fabulous Timberley Hill, the
Speaker 1: One and Only Baby re Creative, Tory Field, Kim Holster,
Speaker 1: Courtney kat six one five, Next Time, Madman, Ali Barter
Speaker 1: and Marl Sparkly, Drew Wastoid and make Gonegal twenty twenty
Speaker 1: and Rivkaas for the giving me the male name, Oh no, no, no,
Speaker 1: the female the name right, and um, I don't remember
Speaker 1: who sent me the male name. I'll be honest, I
Speaker 1: have it. I am, I Am. I have so many appointments,
Speaker 1: so keep them coming. You can email us at naps pod,
Speaker 1: the number one at gmail dot com or always dm us,
Speaker 1: or comment on Twitter our Instagram to send us. Send
Speaker 1: us your one line so we can use that. Please,