Speaker 1: I was donkey up today. Damn he hogged donkey to day.
Speaker 1: I ain't trying to be donkey today no more. They
Speaker 1: should be embarrassed by what they already did. I'm not
Speaker 1: making new people do these things.
Speaker 2: Called donkey of the day, and it really caught me
Speaker 2: off guard. Damn Charla man who got the donkey out
Speaker 2: of the day today? Wow?
Speaker 1: Donkey today?
Speaker 3: For Thursday, February twenty ninth, last day of Black History Month,
Speaker 3: goes to a twenty four year old man named Isaiah
Speaker 3: bar two. Isaiah is from Nebraska, Ladies and getlemen.
Speaker 1: In in Nebraska. He might be.
Speaker 3: It just depends on your definition of ill. Okay, by
Speaker 3: ill you mean mentally, Yeah, that's probably true. See, Isaiah
Speaker 3: was looking for a sweet licky. Y'all know what a
Speaker 3: sweet lick is, right, Huh, all your toxic studs, calm down.
Speaker 3: I'm not talking about that kind of sweet lick, all right, Okay,
Speaker 3: I'm talking about the kind of sweet lick that the
Speaker 3: Urban Dictionary defines his easy money. Basically, if I wanted
Speaker 3: to rob you, make something from you, it would be
Speaker 3: easy to do so. I guess Isaiah, knowing he had
Speaker 3: a sweet lick, decided to use something sweet to get
Speaker 3: the lick off all the toxic studs out there, like
Speaker 3: Uncle Sharlah, What are you talking about? Why do you
Speaker 3: keep talking about sweets and licks? You're making us hungry
Speaker 3: and horny.
Speaker 1: I'm anshop. Well, let's go to ten eleven Now News
Speaker 1: for the report. Police.
Speaker 4: A Lincoln man is in jail or accused of holding
Speaker 4: up a Quick Shop and taking money from the register.
Speaker 4: Police say Isaiah bar Two walked into the store earlier
Speaker 4: this week and demanded money and employee tels officers. Bar
Speaker 4: Two had a Hostess cinnamon roll box over his hand,
Speaker 4: making them believe he was armed with a gun. Now,
Speaker 4: they gave him money and he took off. Investigators say
Speaker 4: bar Two was later found nearby with a handgun. I
Speaker 4: don't get him money and meth. He's facing a number
Speaker 4: of charges, including for robbery and weapons violations.
Speaker 1: I don't get it. This is what I don't understand.
Speaker 3: If you actually had a handgun that police caught you with,
Speaker 3: Lada to the robbery. Why would you rob quick Shop
Speaker 3: with a box of Hostess cinnamon rolls?
Speaker 1: What is the reason you had a pistol? But you
Speaker 1: decided to use pastries? This man has a gun tat
Speaker 1: it on his right forearm.
Speaker 3: Why I don't know, because clearly it's just for show,
Speaker 3: because he chose cinnabuns over guns.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I like cinna buns over guns too, especially when I'm
Speaker 3: high off marijuana with the munchies and when I'm at
Speaker 3: Charlston International Airport, but not when robbing a quick shop. Okay,
Speaker 3: we all play too much, all right. I don't understand
Speaker 3: why humans play with their.
Speaker 1: Own lives and the lives of others.
Speaker 3: You go in quick shop with a box of cinnamon rolls,
Speaker 3: not a person behind the counter is fin for their
Speaker 3: life because they think you got a gun. They might
Speaker 3: have a gun, and they might be fast on the draw.
Speaker 3: Next thing you know, you dead over a Danish How
Speaker 3: you gonna explain that in the afterlife?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 3: Sitting in hell over Hostess cinnamon rolls eternal hell fire
Speaker 3: for cinnamon swirrels. The news report says the female clerk
Speaker 3: feared the container of Hostess cinnamon rolls contained a handgun,
Speaker 3: That's why she gave up the money.
Speaker 1: But no, it was just individually.
Speaker 3: Wrapped frosted pastries. Young lady, you did the right things.
Speaker 3: Drop on the cluthes box of that young lady. This
Speaker 3: isn't social media where you have time to figure out
Speaker 3: if something is real or not.
Speaker 1: Quick shopping' dying for you.
Speaker 3: Give that man a couple of dollars for his latest
Speaker 3: meth habit and move on.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 3: I don't know whether the blameness on the meth or
Speaker 3: the current society we live in.
Speaker 1: See.
Speaker 3: I understand drugs make you do something strange for a
Speaker 3: little bit of change, but we also just live in
Speaker 3: a strange society. It's a bizarre world where a man
Speaker 3: would absolutely leave his pistol at home but put his
Speaker 3: hostess in a gun hoster to go rob the quick shops,
Speaker 3: only to get caught and charged for his pistol later.
Speaker 3: Some don'ty today is just sell themselves. Please give Isaiah
Speaker 3: bar two to sweech downs of the Hamilton's.
Speaker 1: You all.
Speaker 3: Oh the day, ye oh the day.
Speaker 1: Ye.
Speaker 2: I don't know why you squeezing that bottle of water
Speaker 2: like that?
Speaker 1: That really gets to me.
Speaker 2: I don't know why. It's like why why you just
Speaker 2: won't just why do you have to squeeze the bottle
Speaker 2: of water like that?
Speaker 1: Look at that? But he does that with everything like
Speaker 1: he's very rough paused with everything. You see the way
Speaker 1: he puts lotion on his face. He beats his face up.
Speaker 1: You see where he put absolutely beats.
Speaker 3: I'm so judgmental in this room, wanting to be so judgmental.
Speaker 1: No, we're not judging you.
Speaker 2: We want you to take better care of yourself and
Speaker 2: calm down.
Speaker 1: Calm down. I have strength. It's crazy. I have a
Speaker 1: quick announcement.
Speaker 3: By the way, you know that I am a New
Speaker 3: York Times Give me some drum rolls or something. You
Speaker 3: know I am a New York Times bestselling author, Right, yes, sir,
Speaker 3: national bestseller. Thank you to everyone who has purchased my
Speaker 3: first book, Black Privilege, Opportunity Comes to Those who created,
Speaker 3: which came out in twenty sixteen. Thank you to everyone
Speaker 3: who supported my second book, Shook One of Anxiety Playing
Speaker 3: Tricks on Me that came out in twenty eighteen. And
Speaker 3: since then, I've launched my own book imprint with Simon
Speaker 3: and Schuston called Black Privileged Publishing.
Speaker 1: And I am proud to announce this morning that.
Speaker 3: My third book titled Get Honest Are Die Line? Why
Speaker 3: Small Talk Sucks? I repeat, my third book titled Get
Speaker 3: Honest Are Die Line?
Speaker 1: Why small Talk Sucks will.
Speaker 3: Be available May twenty first, twenty twenty four, okay, and
Speaker 3: it is available for pre order everywhere you buy books now. Okay,
Speaker 3: So whether it's Amazon, Barnes and Nobles, wherever you buy
Speaker 3: your books, you can go purchase pre order my third
Speaker 3: book right now, Get Honest or Die Line Why Small
Speaker 3: Talk Sucks?
Speaker 1: Okay. The book is literally how I hate small talk
Speaker 1: on all levels. All right, don't just come up to
Speaker 1: me talking about nothing for the sake of talking. And
Speaker 1: it's how It's.
Speaker 3: About how we make micros macros in this society and
Speaker 3: we spend so much time talking about small things that
Speaker 3: don't matter.
Speaker 1: So May twenty.
Speaker 3: First, twenty twenty four, my third book, Get Honest, are
Speaker 3: Die Line, Why Small Talk Sucks, will be in bookstores everywhere,
Speaker 3: but it's available for pre order right now.
Speaker 1: There you go. Congratulations. Okay, So who thought of the title?
Speaker 1: The author? It is so long, that's like it's really
Speaker 1: get what is it? Let me show you how it
Speaker 1: looks on the books. That's just like the movie. And
Speaker 1: you see get one line. I grew up Jehovah's Witness, right,
Speaker 1: so I'm gonna my cousin did Yeah? Who she no London.
Speaker 1: So this is like my book of Bible stores that
Speaker 1: we grew up on. See like the yellow with the
Speaker 1: red funt yes, the ones that will ring the door
Speaker 1: bell one, get on us to die line, Why small
Speaker 1: talk stucks? Okay, available for pre order right now everywhere
Speaker 1: you buy books.
Speaker 2: But that just really reminds me of like the movie
Speaker 2: I Know what you did last Summer, and then the
Speaker 2: party was like I still know what you did last summer,
Speaker 2: and then was.
Speaker 1: Like I still get.
Speaker 2: No please.
Speaker 1: That is so long because the title so long. All
Speaker 1: my taco line.
Speaker 3: Black privilege opportunity comes to those who created shook and anxiety,
Speaker 3: playing tricks on me, Getting honest or die line, Why
Speaker 3: small talk sucks? You can't even say it fast because
Speaker 3: you I don't want to say it fast.
Speaker 1: Get our die line? Why small talk? What's the first one?
Speaker 1: What's the first one? Get honest to di line? No,
Speaker 1: what's the first one? Black privilege opportunity comes to those exactly.
Speaker 2: It's so long, you gotta like really really get it down.
Speaker 1: Bestseller, go preorder your book right now.
Speaker 2: Everyone saying that I'm a New York bestseller.
Speaker 1: Everybody is.
Speaker 2: You're gonna be saying that to My book is just
Speaker 2: gonna be called clip Burnson.
Speaker 1: Not what it's just gonna be called.
Speaker 3: Donkey Today is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney Michael
Speaker 3: to Bull Lamb and stuff.
Speaker 1: Don't be a donkey when you need a fighter on
Speaker 1: your side.
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Speaker 1: That's Michael to Bull dot com. And when you mess
Speaker 1: with the bull, you get the Haunch. Wake that ass
Speaker 1: up in the morning. Breakfast Club