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Speaker 1: My father sixty two male won't help my mom fifty

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Speaker 1: six female after major back surgery.

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Speaker 2: Oh he blew that back out for sure.

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Speaker 1: Sorry Momy mamy, Oh where we're terrible? But you know

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Speaker 1: he isn't terrible. Sam, is this wonderful wonderful op Funky

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Speaker 1: Town Foggy.

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Speaker 3: Oh, Fucky Town Foggy. That is a like that's an

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Speaker 3: artist name right there from six pm to two am.

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Speaker 3: But you will have me as your djin two the

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Speaker 3: fuck on DJ Funky Town Foggy and let the spits

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Speaker 3: of records to make you feel fucking boom boom boom.

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Speaker 1: This is my first post ever, so I'm sorry if

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Speaker 1: there are formatting errors, Yeah.

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Speaker 4: You better apologize. Hare, are you just outkp?

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Speaker 1: Come on, Masters of Grammars the English language? So, I

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Speaker 1: twenty one female and my sister nineteen female have been

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Speaker 1: taking care of my mom after major back surgery.

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Speaker 4: She had a.

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Speaker 1: Spinal fusion on five of her vertebrae and this is

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Speaker 1: one of the most intense surgeries someone could have.

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Speaker 3: Would turn your mom into the termination over here exoskeleton.

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Speaker 1: My mom has a degenerative disc disease. Wow, that's that's

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Speaker 1: just an interesting coupling of words degenerative disc disease like

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Speaker 1: lo I low, you want to make an album like

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Speaker 1: a degenerative disc disease.

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Speaker 2: We're not making fun of your mom, just the name

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Speaker 2: of the disease.

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Speaker 1: That will want to recom and her back deteriorated so

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Speaker 1: much that fusion was her only option.

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Speaker 2: The power of the SOD What is that from?

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Speaker 3: It's from Spider Man too, when he makes a nuclear

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Speaker 3: fusion reactor.

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Speaker 4: Jesus Christ, that's a pretty good I know.

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Speaker 2: I can't lie.

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Speaker 1: She's been home for about a week now and all

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Speaker 1: of the responsibility of taking care of her has fallen

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Speaker 1: on my sister and I. Currently we work eight to

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Speaker 1: four at the same job, trying to save up money

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Speaker 1: for our next college semester. Then we come home and

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Speaker 1: spend the rest of the night taking care of our mom.

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Speaker 1: There's been multiple times where we have to come to

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Speaker 1: our mom being in intense pain because my dad didn't

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Speaker 1: change your ice pack for hours or left so she

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Speaker 1: didn't have anyone to help her or.

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Speaker 3: Get her out of her chair. How is the dad

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Speaker 3: like not doing anything? You are the husband you're supposed

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Speaker 3: to You're supposed to be a good hubby. Literally, God,

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Speaker 3: I bought my girlfriend three jars of arawan soup when

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Speaker 3: she was sick.

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Speaker 4: Talk about it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you can't even give her an ice pack.

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Speaker 5: You can't even give it an ice pack.

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Speaker 1: Oh, my mom cannot move without a walker and she

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Speaker 1: needs someone to help her get up. Me and my

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Speaker 1: sister are so stressed out right now, and my fear

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Speaker 1: is that our dad will continue to not take responsibilit

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Speaker 1: for my mom and while we have to juggle school, work,

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Speaker 1: my mom, and our personal lives. I have a Mexican

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Speaker 1: father and there's a very strong culture that the women

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Speaker 1: do all the work in the house. Me and my

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Speaker 1: sister have had multiple breakdowns due to the stress I

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Speaker 1: can imagine.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, this sounds rough.

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Speaker 4: My mom is not.

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Speaker 2: Doing good either, and I frequently see her screaming.

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Speaker 4: And crying in pain.

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Speaker 5: Oh that is awful.

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Speaker 1: I don't know how to help my mom more, and

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Speaker 1: I don't know how to cope with everything going on.

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Speaker 1: How do I make my dad help more? And how

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Speaker 1: do I handle the situation with my mom?

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Speaker 3: I mean you have to have a like a sit

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Speaker 3: down conversation ASA, truly.

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Speaker 1: Like this is something you got to sit down and

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Speaker 1: be like listen like this, this this is really big,

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Speaker 1: Like this is you need to step up as a husband, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: as like a husband as you know.

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Speaker 3: I think like like what you're describing is maybe a

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Speaker 3: more macho culture and so maybe like play into that

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Speaker 3: where it's like you need to step up up. You

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Speaker 3: need to step up as a husband and as a man,

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Speaker 3: as like the man in the house, Like you need

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Speaker 3: to be there as a protector and as a provider. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and this is when she needs you to provide and

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Speaker 3: protect her most.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this is what like.

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Speaker 3: You know, your marriage vows are probably based on you know,

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Speaker 3: in sickness and in health, and if you're not going

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Speaker 3: to be there for her in sickness, like who what

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Speaker 3: kind of husband are you?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, there's actually someone.

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Speaker 2: There was a few comments here.

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Speaker 1: One person who commented basically that like, remind your dad

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Speaker 1: of the marriage vows for better for in sickness and

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Speaker 1: in health.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Literally that's like part of the promise and there's a

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Speaker 1: quick exchange. I don't know much about this, but if

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Speaker 1: you can afford it, maybe get a nurse or have

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Speaker 1: a reliable family member look after your mom. You would

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Speaker 1: also have to sit down with your dad and have

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Speaker 1: a talk with him regarding your mother about how he

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Speaker 1: cannot continue to do this to you and his wife.

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Speaker 1: Hope this helps. I wish I could get a care nurse,

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Speaker 1: but we can't afford it. My dad is a bum

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Speaker 1: and barely works as is. It's just been a really

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Speaker 1: hard night, and recovery for her is six months to

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Speaker 1: two years.

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Speaker 2: Wowow.

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Speaker 1: I've tried talking with him, I've yelled at him, but

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Speaker 1: he just doesn't get it. I just don't know what

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Speaker 1: to do. Maybe try a neighbor that you know well

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Speaker 1: or get to know so that we could help you.

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Speaker 1: Guys out, I didn't think to try my neighbors. I

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Speaker 1: don't know them very well. But there's a family that

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Speaker 1: lives across the street. I can check up on her

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Speaker 1: and see if it can help. My dad does go

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Speaker 1: back to work next week and me and my sister

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Speaker 1: go back to school. We don't have any relatives in

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Speaker 1: the area, so it's hard to think of people to

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Speaker 1: look after her.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's really tough. That's a super tough situation.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I think like the sit down conversation with

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Speaker 3: your dad is probably gonna be the best route. Yes, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I understand. Maybe a nurse is out of reach financially,

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Speaker 3: but you know, in times of trouble, like if you

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Speaker 3: have a family and friends around, maybe don't lean on

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Speaker 3: just one entirely, but you could spread out some of

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Speaker 3: that stuff where it's like, hey, I need I need help,

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Speaker 3: Like you come in like you know, maybe like once

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Speaker 3: every two weeks or something like you really build a

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Speaker 3: schedule and friends just help you out with this because

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Speaker 3: you know, that's that's.

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Speaker 2: What friends are for.

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Speaker 3: Literally, Yeah, and uh and if you know they if

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Speaker 3: they care, maybe maybe you can have a little bit

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Speaker 3: of help.

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Speaker 2: Through this.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, man, this is this is tough. This is

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Speaker 3: a tough situation and stuff.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely wishing the best for you.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, op really wish you that. Thank you for sharing

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Speaker 3: your story. Yeah, I really appreciate it. And please keep

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Speaker 3: us updated on how your mom's done. Yes, please do

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Speaker 3: please do This feels inappropriate And if you have other

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Speaker 3: stories that you want to tell or anyone, give them.

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Speaker 4: Advice you know you want.

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Speaker 1: Honestly, it's great to see other people sharing, like in

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Speaker 1: the comments, like like.

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Speaker 3: Seeing the community supporting the community. So exactly, if anyone

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Speaker 3: else has any stories that they want to share, go

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Speaker 3: to our sash Okop show and we will read them.

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Speaker 2: Please do okay op?

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Speaker 4: Am I the a hole if I send my parents

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Speaker 4: to jail? Oh my god?

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Speaker 6: Yeah yes maybe yeah your parents well hold on, let's yeah,

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Speaker 6: but you're not winning any awards for like best son

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Speaker 6: or daughter here if you said your parents to jail.

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Speaker 1: My twenty nine female parents have always been in financial trouble,

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Speaker 1: something that I have never been able to understand because

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Speaker 1: they both have a really generous salary, more than three

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Speaker 1: times my own salary.

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Speaker 5: That could be big, That could be big A lot, right, yeah,

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Speaker 5: I mean, well it depends. I don't know.

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Speaker 3: There's like twenty nine year olds that are janitors fair,

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Speaker 3: and then there's twenty nine year olds that are lawyers.

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Speaker 1: That are Yeah, so there's somewhere between a janitor probably

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Speaker 1: safe to say it's it's a lot. Because of these

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Speaker 1: financial troubles, my aunts, uncles and grandma have all asked

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Speaker 1: my parents to lend them money. We were evicted a

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Speaker 1: couple of times that I know, and we've had the water,

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Speaker 1: electricity and internet cut.

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Speaker 5: Wait what that's no good? No bueno, no bueno, bueno,

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Speaker 5: no no no.

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Speaker 1: And many of these things over the year. I admit

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Speaker 1: have affected my emotional and mental health. I get it,

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Speaker 1: op Like, Bro, if your.

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Speaker 6: Water's gonna shift turn on, I'm gonna raise he being evicted, Yeah,

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Speaker 6: big big child.

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Speaker 1: All of this understandably made my relationship with my parents

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Speaker 1: very difficult over the years, and even more so when

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Speaker 1: they would take advantage of me paying for things with

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Speaker 1: the money that I was earning during the holidays to

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Speaker 1: pay for college, or making me call my grandma to

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Speaker 1: ask her for money.

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Speaker 2: Oh, so they're.

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Speaker 1: Sending the op out basically begged the family, exactly beg

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Speaker 1: for the family, and all of this while my mom

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Speaker 1: used to spend money on whatever she wanted pursus jewelry.

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Speaker 5: Bro, that's why they're having financial trouble. They're making three

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Speaker 5: times their salary. Yeah, they're buying those Gucci bag.

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Speaker 4: Louis bat.

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Speaker 7: So.

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Speaker 1: The moment I became an adult, they started to sign

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Speaker 1: bills under my name without my permission.

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Speaker 4: Bruh. And this was most Can you imagine your parents

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Speaker 4: doing that?

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Speaker 3: I can, and well, I mean not that I can,

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Speaker 3: like h no, no, no, my parents would never do that,

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Speaker 3: But in imagining it, it makes me very sad.

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Speaker 1: I can empathize they did this because their credit was

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Speaker 1: so bad. The companies literally wouldn't allow them to sign

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Speaker 1: their own names. When I figured this out, I asked

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Speaker 1: them to stop, but they just lied and just told

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Speaker 1: me to let it go because I couldn't deal with it.

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Speaker 4: Let it go, excuse me, you let it go? Uh?

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Speaker 4: You let go?

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Speaker 5: I have two lines for you. Let it go, Let it.

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Speaker 4: Go, lock the door.

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Speaker 7: I don't care anyway.

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Speaker 5: What a great song.

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Speaker 1: Fast forward to the present because of the whole rona situation.

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Speaker 1: I was looking forward to the money from my tax

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Speaker 1: return because my salary has gone down because of the

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Speaker 1: whole situation. John, you got a mouth, right, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: and you got some sweet lips ooh, and everybody listening

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Speaker 1: has a beautiful mouths that we have to fill with

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Speaker 1: food to survive.

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Speaker 2: And John, the best and freshest way to do that

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Speaker 2: is HelloFresh.

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Speaker 3: Heck you, it is like throw your grocery carts right

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Speaker 3: off a cliff, because HelloFresh will send your meals right

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Speaker 3: to your door.

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Speaker 1: Oh and you know their meals only take fifteen minutes,

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Speaker 1: say fifteen minutes, and listen to what they got. I'm

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Speaker 1: the greatest deal on planet Earth?

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Speaker 2: Dogs Boom, boom boom. This show is sponsored by Betterhelp

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Speaker 2: You Know Same.

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Speaker 1: It seems like this podcast has just become the Internet,

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Speaker 1: asking us to fix their problems.

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Speaker 3: In their life, right all right? I mean, like, hey,

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Speaker 3: we're happy to do that. We're happy to share some advice,

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Speaker 3: But John, I think we should face the music.

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Speaker 2: We're not professionals. I mean, we're pretty dang good. We are,

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Speaker 2: we are.

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Speaker 3: But if you want to share your thoughts and feelings

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Speaker 3: with a professional, someone who can actually sit down and

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Speaker 3: like solve the problems in your life.

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Speaker 2: There is a place you can go.

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Speaker 1: Yes, the perfect place to go is Better Help. It's

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Speaker 1: fill out a questionnaire and they match you with an

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Speaker 1: incredible licensed professional who isn't Sam and John. And if

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Speaker 1: can switch any time with no extra cost.

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Speaker 2: Hey, that sounds like a deal within deal.

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Speaker 8: You say you'll never join the Navy, never track storm

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Speaker 8: you need Atlantic. What's got I that's part of your

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Speaker 8: come out? Joining the Navy sounds crazy? Saying never actually

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Speaker 8: is learn why at Navy dot com. America's Navy forged

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Speaker 8: by the sea equation.

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Speaker 1: So this money would help a lot. But instead of

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Speaker 1: getting my tax return, guess what I got?

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Speaker 3: What?

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Speaker 1: By the way, editors, Yeah, I know you already hate us.

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Speaker 1: Just connect the last paragraph to uh look at that notion.

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Speaker 4: Just figure it out, bruh.

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Speaker 1: Not only did I not get the return, I received

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Speaker 1: a letter from the courthouse saying that my money has

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Speaker 1: been confiscated.

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Speaker 4: No.

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Speaker 1: I immediately phoned my mom and she said that she

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Speaker 1: didn't know anything about it.

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Speaker 5: These are the worst parents. They remind me of freaking

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Speaker 5: Harry Potter step parents, you know.

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Speaker 3: Like like like the Dursley's forced Harry Potter to live

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Speaker 3: under That was foul.

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Speaker 4: That was foul.

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Speaker 5: That was wicked. Bunch of bull shit.

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Speaker 1: Since I didn't trust my mom, I called the court

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Speaker 1: myself and they explained to me that during the last

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Speaker 1: year there has been a process against me by a

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Speaker 1: company that I owe money from unpaid bills. All the

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Speaker 1: papers had been sent to my parents and they had

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Speaker 1: them sign it, not me. The debt was not paid

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Speaker 1: from the money from my tax income return, so now

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Speaker 1: part of my salary will be confiscated until the debt

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Speaker 1: is fully paid. My parents stole my identity to contract

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Speaker 1: a bill under my name, didn't pay for it, and

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Speaker 1: when the company tried to claim the debt through lawyers

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Speaker 1: and a judge, they literally kept all of the papers

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Speaker 1: from me, which is illegal. Apparently, waiting for it to

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Speaker 1: be fixed all by itself. So they were basically like,

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Speaker 1: let's just put it under the rug as much as

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Speaker 1: we can until it all gets sorted magically.

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Speaker 4: Bish, where's that money coming from? Your daughter?

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Speaker 1: And my mother said that it was her right to

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Speaker 1: put my name under their bills because I am her

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Speaker 1: daughter and it is my duty to help with the

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Speaker 1: family burdens.

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Speaker 5: But br you're creating the burden.

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Speaker 1: Since then, and after really nasty words from her side

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Speaker 1: and my sisters, who, by the way, says I'm ungrateful

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Speaker 1: and selfish, I haven't spoke to them, and I'm in

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Speaker 1: the middle of a global pandemic, with my salary already.

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Speaker 4: Low, paying a debt that is not mine.

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Speaker 1: My friends and boyfriends say that I should talk with

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Speaker 1: the police and stop all of this. Otherwise they're just

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Speaker 1: gonna keep doing it, and honestly, I'm afraid they will.

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Speaker 1: So am I the a hole if I speak with

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Speaker 1: the court to put my parents in jail. Even though

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Speaker 1: my parents seventy and sixty three would go to the clinker.

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Speaker 3: I think you gotta put them in the clink. Someone

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Speaker 3: in the chat says, oh, push Ninja, what are you

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Speaker 3: talking about.

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Speaker 5: You're not gonna stick it to the parents. Why you

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Speaker 5: some kind of mama's button.

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Speaker 4: Mama's by heym? Where's that fan of geenie?

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Speaker 2: Come on, man, come on, I want my gorcn thole.

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Speaker 4: I've been moving boxes all day. Man, fifty pounds on meat?

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Speaker 4: Uh pet baroni?

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Speaker 5: Where's the gopa gool?

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Speaker 4: Well that's one episode.

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Speaker 5: We forgot to clap think at the beginning.

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Speaker 4: Yeah we did three what brouh. Yeah, hit the guys.

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Speaker 4: Hit the freaking lik like buttons.

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Speaker 8: You say you'll never join the Navy, that you never

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Speaker 8: track storms, brewing in the Atlantic and skydiving, to never

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Speaker 8: be part of your community. You'd never climb out fuji

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Speaker 8: on a port busy.

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Speaker 3: Oh fly fish, you break the dem here.

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Speaker 8: Joining the Navy sounds crazy. Saying never actually is to

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Speaker 8: start your journey at Navy dot com America's Navy forged

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Speaker 8: by the Sea.