Speaker 1: Episode fifty eight, Building a frugal culture in your community.
Speaker 1: Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to
Speaker 1: save money, embrace simplicity, rights, and liver with your life.
Speaker 1: Here your host Jen and Jill. Hello, everyone, welcome to
Speaker 1: another episode of the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen,
Speaker 1: my name's Jill, and we are excited to be coming
Speaker 1: at you with this really interesting topic that I've been
Speaker 1: really wanting to cover for a long time, and it
Speaker 1: is transitioning your life from a life that doesn't really
Speaker 1: care about how you spend money to one that does,
Speaker 1: and how you can, yeah, how you can bring your
Speaker 1: friends along or if all else fails, find new ones.
Speaker 1: But that was phrased, well, not kick them to the curb,
Speaker 1: just replace them, right, Because it's something that I personally
Speaker 1: went through when Travis and I were starting to pay
Speaker 1: off debt and I had a lot of trouble with it,
Speaker 1: and so I'm sure I'm not the only one because
Speaker 1: my experiences are not unique. That was one of the
Speaker 1: reasons we started Frugal Friends podcasts so that we could
Speaker 1: have more frugal friends, and why we go back and
Speaker 1: forth from Pa to Florida just to maintain that frugal friendship. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: because when you find your frugal soulmate, stay with them
Speaker 1: and start a podcast together. Exactly. So we've got some
Speaker 1: really really good articles to share with you and a
Speaker 1: really sweet lightning round that you're going to get a
Speaker 1: lot of rich content from. When don't you get rich
Speaker 1: content from? For sure? For sure. But first, of course,
Speaker 1: our sponsors, of course, also brought to you by friendship.
Speaker 1: That's right, it's friendship that brings you this podcast today, obviously,
Speaker 1: because friends are the ones you can laugh with, get
Speaker 1: angry with, like as in alongside, you know, make bracelets with,
Speaker 1: start podcasts with, and so much more. Friendship leads to
Speaker 1: so many great things. Try it today. Friendship the best
Speaker 1: kind of ship. Yes, it takes way less maintenance than
Speaker 1: actually owning a ship. I'll say that you have to
Speaker 1: hose it down a lot less than you should hose
Speaker 1: it down a lot less. A lot less hosing down.
Speaker 1: We all know how tiring that can be. Yeah better, Okay.
Speaker 1: Our first headline today is from Living Well, Spending Less
Speaker 1: and this is a guest post on the site from
Speaker 1: a woman named Sherry Low, and it's called how to
Speaker 1: Stay Friends and become debt free or how to stay
Speaker 1: friends while becoming debt free. So even if becoming debt
Speaker 1: free isn't where you're at right now, Uh, this pertains
Speaker 1: to becoming frugal, becoming minimalist. I think it's family that
Speaker 1: we have to worry about more when we're trying to
Speaker 1: become minimalist because the holidays and baby showers are absurd. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So basically, if you're trying to be wise with your
Speaker 1: money and make wise decisions, how you can do that. Yes,
Speaker 1: so this has some tips about how to maintain existing friendships. Jill,
Speaker 1: what did you like about this one? So? I liked
Speaker 1: how they encouraged conversation with your friends, like not not
Speaker 1: keeping people in the dark if you do have goals
Speaker 1: that you're trying to get at, and they do a
Speaker 1: good job of sussing out like who you share with,
Speaker 1: who you don't share with. Um, they're not saying, like
Speaker 1: advertise on Facebook everything that's going on in your life financially,
Speaker 1: but having like a heart to heart at the right time.
Speaker 1: And they kind of like correlated this to the DTR
Speaker 1: for those that don't know, like the Define the relationship
Speaker 1: conversation you know, where it's like, are we going to
Speaker 1: be exclusive or yeah was a little far, but a
Speaker 1: little bit too far they just wanted to reference to
Speaker 1: tr But anyways, just telling your friends about what it
Speaker 1: is that you want to be doing with your finances
Speaker 1: and how that might impact the relationship. And this is
Speaker 1: a good opportunity to be able to explain that you
Speaker 1: value the person you want relationship with. You want to
Speaker 1: be able to hang out, but that may mean a
Speaker 1: little bit less hanging out over dinner at a restaurant,
Speaker 1: and so just some just some heads up, right, it's
Speaker 1: good to help set expectations for people and communicate that
Speaker 1: is the key to relationships. And to be able to
Speaker 1: say I want to pay down debt or whatever it
Speaker 1: is that you want to do, which means over the
Speaker 1: next year, I am going to be going out to
Speaker 1: restaurants a lot less frequently, but please invite me over.
Speaker 1: I still want to invite you over. It may mean
Speaker 1: a lot more barbecues in my backyard, but I hope
Speaker 1: that we can still maintain this relationship. And right, like
Speaker 1: it shouldn't be founded on whether or not you can
Speaker 1: go to restaurants together. Yeah, just like saying what to
Speaker 1: expect like, you might hear no from me more, but
Speaker 1: it's not because I don't want to spend time with you.
Speaker 1: It's because what I want to do financially. And I
Speaker 1: like the She notes that it's closest friends, like again,
Speaker 1: not advertising on Facebook, are just going up to people
Speaker 1: you just met and be like, Hey, I'm gonna say
Speaker 1: no if you ask me to dinner. And I think
Speaker 1: this this is true even if financial situations shift, like
Speaker 1: if you just lost your job or unexpected financial concerns
Speaker 1: have arisen, Even if you're not trying to get at
Speaker 1: specific financial goals, that can alter the landscape of what
Speaker 1: you're able to do and engage in. And a lot
Speaker 1: of times we can try and cover that up and
Speaker 1: continue status quo, like yeah, we always go out on
Speaker 1: Wednesday nights to bowl or whatever it is that you're doing.
Speaker 1: But that may not be wise anymore because you've got
Speaker 1: to pay off a new medical bill, or you don't
Speaker 1: have the same cash flow anymore. And so I think
Speaker 1: just being willing to be vulnerable in this way with
Speaker 1: your close friends to say hey, here's what's happening for me,
Speaker 1: which means here's how my life needs to shift. Of course,
Speaker 1: this isn't This is an interesting one where when we
Speaker 1: share what's going on for ourselves financially, also making sure
Speaker 1: we're not putting other people in a position where they
Speaker 1: feel like you need to now be their charity, right,
Speaker 1: No one wants to do that, And I think sometimes
Speaker 1: that's a barrier to telling people is like, now are
Speaker 1: they going to feel like they have to buy my
Speaker 1: meals every time we go out? Or are they gonna
Speaker 1: I don't want them to just feel sorry for me,
Speaker 1: And so I think some of that is the way
Speaker 1: that we approach it. But that's that's worth noting too
Speaker 1: as a potential barrier, and even how we communicate these
Speaker 1: things to not put people in a position where they
Speaker 1: feel like, okay, so now I'm buying the dinner, what
Speaker 1: do you think about? But how do you? What are you?
Speaker 1: What are your thoughts? And not putting people in that position. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean we experienced that same thing too while we
Speaker 1: were paying off debt. We had people who were just
Speaker 1: more generous that you know, would buy us tickets to
Speaker 1: things or bias meals, and it does it feels it
Speaker 1: feels awkward because it's like, it's not that I can't
Speaker 1: afford it like I have a job, I just am
Speaker 1: putting my money towards something else. So I think making
Speaker 1: that distinction with your friends and saying like, in no
Speaker 1: way do I expect to be your charity case or
Speaker 1: do I want you to buy me things so that
Speaker 1: we can hang out. I actually want to shift the
Speaker 1: way we spend time. And this actually goes into my
Speaker 1: favorite part of the article, which is refined how you
Speaker 1: spend time with others. So this isn't just about having
Speaker 1: friends you know, buy you tickets and meals, but it's
Speaker 1: it's cultivating a new way of doing things, So thinking
Speaker 1: about free activities and spending more nights in each other's homes.
Speaker 1: And I like this quote. She said, if a night
Speaker 1: out on the town for the two of you cost
Speaker 1: more than the g d P of a small country,
Speaker 1: it's time to scale back your quality time, which is
Speaker 1: so funny, but it's like so true. And they're most
Speaker 1: of your friends will be super open to refining how
Speaker 1: you spend time, and if they are not, then you
Speaker 1: just have to be open with them and say like, hey,
Speaker 1: I understand this is not where you want to be
Speaker 1: at this time, and like your priorities are different, So
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna have to scale back. But it's not you,
Speaker 1: it's me. And I've even been surprised in this process
Speaker 1: of how much a lot of us just go through
Speaker 1: the motions. It's almost that group think idea of we're
Speaker 1: all just going to go out to a restaurant because
Speaker 1: what else will we do? But then we can actually
Speaker 1: say I'm trying to scale back. Do you all just
Speaker 1: want to come over here and like, let's do some
Speaker 1: frozen pizza? How many people are like, yeah, Like I
Speaker 1: don't really care to go out to a restaurant. It's
Speaker 1: just like what else were we gonna do? And you
Speaker 1: may I have even found that a lot of other people.
Speaker 1: It has spurred others on to say, yeah, me too,
Speaker 1: I have financial goals I want to get after. Let's
Speaker 1: do this thing together, and even opening up about your
Speaker 1: goals can cause some friendships that can help you sustain
Speaker 1: in the progress of your goals. Yes hard, yes, hard, hard,
Speaker 1: yes hard, yes, anything else on this one. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: they just are also talking about making the tough decisions
Speaker 1: in this and being willing to Yeah, sometimes it will
Speaker 1: be a sacrifice. Right, We're not saying that you can
Speaker 1: have your cake and eat it too. To set money
Speaker 1: aside for some financial goals means some sacrifice in some areas,
Speaker 1: hopefully not relationally right, hopefully you can keep relationships, but
Speaker 1: it might mean that, yeah, you're gonna sit out that
Speaker 1: Broadway show, but you'll catch them next time during the
Speaker 1: backyard barbecue. So apparently I love barbecues as alternatives going
Speaker 1: on to a restaurant. They're I do have a lot
Speaker 1: of our friends are in this place of either home
Speaker 1: buying or raising kids or paying to own debt, and
Speaker 1: so there is some similarities at least in my friend
Speaker 1: group in the decisions we want to make with our
Speaker 1: money and go to hang out. For us is like
Speaker 1: b y oh thing for your grill, and so then
Speaker 1: that can be whatever you want. Sure, if you want
Speaker 1: to spend money on a steak and you want to
Speaker 1: put that on the grill, fine, If you just want
Speaker 1: to bring a bunch of veggies and a salad and
Speaker 1: put the veggies on a grill, that's fine too. And
Speaker 1: so it's kind of a fun, fun way of getting together,
Speaker 1: sharing a meal and not breaking the bank. So there
Speaker 1: will be sacrifices in it, but you can still be
Speaker 1: creative with relationships. And maintaining those friendships. Yeah. And I mean,
Speaker 1: and if in the unfortunate event that like you have
Speaker 1: a friend or a friend group that isn't willing to
Speaker 1: be flexible with what they do to spend more time
Speaker 1: with you, it's not like a like a hard and
Speaker 1: fast decision you have to make just to like stop
Speaker 1: hanging out with them. I did have a few friends
Speaker 1: that just were not at the same place at the
Speaker 1: same time, and some of them have like since changed
Speaker 1: and have you know, come over to the frugal side,
Speaker 1: you know, but they weren't at the same place at
Speaker 1: the same time, and so we didn't hang out in
Speaker 1: that time in that season that we were paying off debt.
Speaker 1: But now that you know, we're debt free and we
Speaker 1: have a little bit more spending money and they're you know,
Speaker 1: a little bit more focused on finances. You know, we
Speaker 1: reconnect and it's like no time ever passed. So you
Speaker 1: have to be willing to make those hard decisions and
Speaker 1: to not not feel guilted or obligated to keep relationships
Speaker 1: going if they're not where you want to go big picture. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and if they're not responding to the invitations to just
Speaker 1: come over and hang out and have some tea together
Speaker 1: and yeah, okay, then what is the relationship built upon?
Speaker 1: So if you have to make some new friends, that's
Speaker 1: not the worst thing in the world. Right right now,
Speaker 1: we've been so much from our new friends. Yes, so
Speaker 1: our next article is all about that. It is from
Speaker 1: Tanya Hester at our Next Life and it is the
Speaker 1: benefits of building a frugal real life community. So not
Speaker 1: just in our wonderful frugal friends community on Facebook, which
Speaker 1: you definitely should all join because it's super fun, but
Speaker 1: you got to have that real life community. So she
Speaker 1: starts the first half of it is all about the benefits,
Speaker 1: but we want to skip down to the nitty gritty
Speaker 1: of how to build a real life frugal community. The
Speaker 1: first thing I liked and the thing that has been
Speaker 1: the most helpful for me is looking for thematically appropriate meetups.
Speaker 1: So these are meetups either through Facebook or meetup dot
Speaker 1: com or something that are focused on either you know,
Speaker 1: there's like financial independence meetups and like side hustle meetups,
Speaker 1: and You're buy Nothing group has meetups. So all kinds
Speaker 1: of like meetups with people that you already know a
Speaker 1: d percent are going to be frugal Beyond the Shadow
Speaker 1: of a Doubt, No going in so that and we
Speaker 1: have we've been part of Choose five, which is another
Speaker 1: really great podcast. They have local meetups. So we've been
Speaker 1: a part of the Tampa Bay one for over a
Speaker 1: year and we have made some great friends from yeah,
Speaker 1: from that group and we get together like once a
Speaker 1: month and it's super fun, super frugal, and we talk
Speaker 1: about like all kinds of nerdy stuff and so yeah,
Speaker 1: I love that one. Yeah, And kind of reflecting back
Speaker 1: to even the previous article, this one talks about talking
Speaker 1: about your goals with existing friends. So even looking within
Speaker 1: your current network to see who might share similar interests
Speaker 1: and help me to stay on track with what I've
Speaker 1: decided to set my hands to and might be able
Speaker 1: to create even greater connection and partnership in this thing
Speaker 1: that I'm trying to get after. Yeah, you could have
Speaker 1: some like acquaintances in your arsenal that could be your
Speaker 1: like next greatest friend. You just don't know yet. It
Speaker 1: could be just like a random person on Facebook and
Speaker 1: then you and then you're like, yeah, let's meet up,
Speaker 1: let's be friends, let's start a podcast. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: love at first sight. So yeah, exactly. I also liked
Speaker 1: um send signals through your actions, which was really when
Speaker 1: I read it at first, I was like, like smoke signals,
Speaker 1: Like I don't, can just just send up smoke signals alarm?
Speaker 1: She said, turn on the alarm bells. You can draw
Speaker 1: out the secretly frugal folks through subtle actions. So it
Speaker 1: sounds manipulative and fun. I love it. But I guess
Speaker 1: through just doing normal frugal things and seeing who shows
Speaker 1: up or who's super into it can give you an
Speaker 1: idea of who around you leans more towards a frugal lifestyle. Okay,
Speaker 1: and she also suggests chatting with people on planes, like
Speaker 1: I don't recommend that. I like to just put my
Speaker 1: headphones on and look, put a headphone in and get
Speaker 1: this plane right over with that's amazing. I just forced
Speaker 1: my frugal lifestyle on other people. Guys show up to
Speaker 1: a baby out and I'm like, yeah, these closes are
Speaker 1: from the thrift store, but I washed them. What you
Speaker 1: do with it after that is up to you. I
Speaker 1: actually put that on my baby shower invitation that I
Speaker 1: prefer second hand and used items, but I'm also registered
Speaker 1: at Target. One person brought me like hand me downs
Speaker 1: from her son, but also got me a Target gift card. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and then my mom got me this really sweet swing
Speaker 1: so and everybody else, even though they like knew they
Speaker 1: had the option to get me like cheap thrift stuff,
Speaker 1: they didn't. They just went to Target. So, which is fine.
Speaker 1: You know, not everybody wants to do the frugal thing,
Speaker 1: and you just you give people options, yeah, and sometimes
Speaker 1: you force it on them. Okay. I think along with this,
Speaker 1: I do want to just make sure that we bring
Speaker 1: some balance to this conversation and that it's not about
Speaker 1: surrounding yourself with everyone who's like minded to you and
Speaker 1: is going after these goals. The reason that we're having
Speaker 1: this conversation is because oftentimes the majority of of people
Speaker 1: that we are surrounded by may not be so focused
Speaker 1: on paying down debt or reaching other financial goals that
Speaker 1: are going to require sacrifices. So this is finding friends
Speaker 1: or making new friends who can help you, not to
Speaker 1: say get rid of all the others, because they're just
Speaker 1: a drag and they're pulling you back. Like it's good
Speaker 1: to have variety and relationships and different perspectives, but when
Speaker 1: you're in a season of really buckling down financially, it's
Speaker 1: really important to have people who are going to cheer
Speaker 1: you on and that who understand some of your reasons
Speaker 1: behind it, who might be doing it themselves, or who
Speaker 1: at least can be supportive. So I think it's more
Speaker 1: about in and adding in people who can provide this
Speaker 1: versus a like taking away or only hanging out with
Speaker 1: people who are like minded. Well said, yeah, that's exactly
Speaker 1: what we're going for. Balance. Balance, yeah, balance and composure. Yes.
Speaker 1: I also liked um. I want to just reiterate the
Speaker 1: joined by nothing groups because this is a twofold like method.
Speaker 1: You can check back to our episode about how to
Speaker 1: Get Everything for Free where we talk more about by
Speaker 1: nothing groups. But these things also have meetups, potlucks, orientations,
Speaker 1: like a lot of opportunities for people to get together
Speaker 1: and do things, and it is a great way to
Speaker 1: meet like minded people. So I also have that one
Speaker 1: anything else stuck out to you jail that's it on
Speaker 1: this one, I think it's again. I do like the
Speaker 1: first part of the article where they talk about the
Speaker 1: benefits of being in a real life frugal community, so
Speaker 1: feel free to reference the article after you listen to
Speaker 1: this podcast. You can head on over to our show
Speaker 1: notes and find the link to the article so you
Speaker 1: can read read the whole thing for yourself. Yes, something
Speaker 1: else that I'm super into and I know you are
Speaker 1: super into. Also chill oh, because how could you not be.
Speaker 1: It's like the literal best time of the week. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's the bill of the week. That's right, It's time
Speaker 1: for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a
Speaker 1: baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you
Speaker 1: paid off your mortgage. Maybe your car died and you're
Speaker 1: happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. That's
Speaker 1: build Buffalo bills, Bill Clinton, this is the bill of
Speaker 1: the week. Hi, Ken and Joe, this is a Marilla's again.
Speaker 1: I wanted to give you an update on but you
Speaker 1: not a bill that I have. I don't know if
Speaker 1: you can hear this, but I'm driving in my brand
Speaker 1: new off Toyota. Oh okay, guy, I love you. Okay,
Speaker 1: by guys love it. Yes, we heard it. We heard it.
Speaker 1: It was I didn't hear it? Were you just punking
Speaker 1: and traffic and talking on the cellphone? Pie of it?
Speaker 1: That's amazing. Congratulations, What has good feeling to have a
Speaker 1: paid off vehicle. Oh my gosh, Yes, we own that thing.
Speaker 1: You own that Toyota Corolla and you're driving it around,
Speaker 1: you're calling the Frugal Friends, you're doing the Bill of
Speaker 1: the week. You're just killing it right now. And it's
Speaker 1: a Toyota curl So you can literally have it forever.
Speaker 1: I challenge you to have that thing forever. Yes, oh
Speaker 1: my gosh. If you have an amazing Bill of the week,
Speaker 1: like Amaryllis, please send us your bill to Frugal Friends
Speaker 1: podcast dot com slash bill and you can leave us
Speaker 1: a speak pipe or a Google voicemail if you're on
Speaker 1: your phone, and we're going to play it because we
Speaker 1: love these, because we love it, so websessed. All right, Well,
Speaker 1: you know what's the next best thing to the Bill
Speaker 1: of the week. The second best thing is our reception
Speaker 1: to that is so different. I'm not changing, I'm not rerecording,
Speaker 1: but I did really enjoy put this one together. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this is a good lightning round and you're finally getting it.
Speaker 1: Was laughing by myself in public, and and that's how
Speaker 1: you know it's good. So let's get into it. Today's
Speaker 1: Lightning Round is four ways to loose friends and make enemies.
Speaker 1: Tell them how to do it. Tell them how to
Speaker 1: do it right. Number one, assume they don't care about
Speaker 1: their finances. Don't ask them. Just assume because your friends
Speaker 1: spend money, it's not because they feel overwhelmed by their finances.
Speaker 1: It's because they just don't care. Yeah. Definitely assume they
Speaker 1: don't care about their finances. That's way number one to
Speaker 1: lose friends and make enemies. Jill, what's number two? Number
Speaker 1: two out of four ways to lose friends and make enemies.
Speaker 1: Shame them when they make a purchase you don't approve of.
Speaker 1: Don't consider that you probably would have made the same
Speaker 1: purchase several weeks ago. Just let everyone know you wouldn't
Speaker 1: do it now, No way, no, how not me, not today,
Speaker 1: wouldn't have made that decision. Nope, all right, I would
Speaker 1: never do that. But go ahead, No, yeah, go ahead,
Speaker 1: go ahead if you wanna. If you want to ruin
Speaker 1: your life, you know, these are some things you can
Speaker 1: say to them, like in an effort if you need
Speaker 1: like a script. Yeah. Um. Way number three to lose
Speaker 1: friends and make enemies talk only about Dave Ramsey, seriously
Speaker 1: only topics from the latest radio show book Financial Peace
Speaker 1: University class. That's it. And occasionally you can mention Rachel
Speaker 1: Cruz or Chris Hogan, but don't go crazy, don't get
Speaker 1: it twisted. Occasionally the closely affiliated people, but other wise,
Speaker 1: and they're the only two, to Dave Ramsey, the only
Speaker 1: two you can reference. Yeah, I mean, just stick to
Speaker 1: one topic. That's That's a surefire way, endless but certainly
Speaker 1: not least way to lose friends and make enemies. Only
Speaker 1: advertise your successes. Did you bust your budget? Did an
Speaker 1: unexpected expense cut your student loan payment? Don't tell any one.
Speaker 1: Only post on social media about how well you're doing
Speaker 1: and that God is obviously smiling on you because your
Speaker 1: choice to become financially secure. I think this is the
Speaker 1: most important one. It's the most important ones, the most
Speaker 1: practical one. Like, just like everything else in life, don't
Speaker 1: tell other people when you fail, like, only tell them
Speaker 1: when you're succeeding. And definitely make sure that you find
Speaker 1: something that you're succeeding in on a regular basis that
Speaker 1: you have enough to talk about to make people understand
Speaker 1: just like how perfect you are. Yes, yeah, people forget
Speaker 1: that little one. You want to have enough successes to
Speaker 1: actually mention it sounds like we're bitter about something. We're
Speaker 1: really not. We're just having fun. Yeah, this really hasn't
Speaker 1: really happened to me before. But it's we definitely know
Speaker 1: ways that you wouldn't keep friends, you know. It's like
Speaker 1: the Bear and Stain Bears, like what not to do. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but here's like a dirty little secret, Like I've probably
Speaker 1: done all of these things at one point or the other.
Speaker 1: And I think if you spend any amount of time
Speaker 1: paying off debt or changing your lifestyle to be like
Speaker 1: more financially conscious, you've done one of these things without
Speaker 1: thinking about it. So I think it's fun just to
Speaker 1: poke fun, like poke fun at ourselves, are at me
Speaker 1: not chill? But now you can poke fun at me.
Speaker 1: I'm over here, I'm over here, you can make fun
Speaker 1: of me. Yeah. So those are the four ways to
Speaker 1: lose friends and make enemies. If you have decided that
Speaker 1: you don't want to do anything else we talked about
Speaker 1: on the first half the episode, then definitely stick with
Speaker 1: these four and we've covered all the base. But don't
Speaker 1: reference us, don't ref prints that you heard it here.
Speaker 1: It is interesting though that you mentioned number one, assuming
Speaker 1: they don't care about their finances. I'm about to bring
Speaker 1: this one full circle. I do think we do this
Speaker 1: a lot, particularly in marriage, when it comes to finances,
Speaker 1: Like if we make different decisions about finances, we can
Speaker 1: I mean right, this is like this is a key
Speaker 1: to marriage. Is like assuming the best in one another,
Speaker 1: which we often don't do. We don't assume the best.
Speaker 1: And so one of those ways is assuming that the
Speaker 1: other person doesn't care about finances. So here's a little
Speaker 1: counseling tidbit for you. We actually did this, and I
Speaker 1: I know this one's for freeing. It's interesting, it's interesting
Speaker 1: enough to share, Okay. So in this couple's counseling session,
Speaker 1: we put like a ten dollar bill on the ground,
Speaker 1: just like whatever somebody had in their pocket. We put
Speaker 1: it on the ground, and we asked both of them,
Speaker 1: both the husband and wife, like if you saw this
Speaker 1: in a room, what would you do? And both of
Speaker 1: them said they would pick it up? Right, Like, what
Speaker 1: would you do if you just saw a ten dollar
Speaker 1: bill lying lying on the ground, Like everybody would say,
Speaker 1: I would pick it up? Why because it has value, right,
Speaker 1: Like you can do something with it. Either it belongs
Speaker 1: to somebody else and you want to give it back
Speaker 1: to them, or you're you're going to pocket it because
Speaker 1: you can purchase something with it, Like it has value.
Speaker 1: And I think just that simple illustration shows that we
Speaker 1: do value finances. Everybody does. Everybody would pick up money
Speaker 1: on the ground. Maybe not everybody would pick up pennies
Speaker 1: like me, I do value even pennies, surprise, but but
Speaker 1: that we have value. So like, let's start the conversation
Speaker 1: from that point that, yes, we both value this thing.
Speaker 1: What we choose to do with it might be different,
Speaker 1: but let's not assume the worst and that you just
Speaker 1: don't care, which I yeah, it can be, and that
Speaker 1: can be a pivotal thing, especially when it comes to
Speaker 1: financial conversations within marriage. So anyhow made me think of that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a really great tip. Thank you for sharing that show.
Speaker 1: You're welcome, alright. So I mean, yeah, it's a pretty
Speaker 1: short episode today, but I feel like it was packed
Speaker 1: with a lot of really good information and I think
Speaker 1: that all of these tips are more instantaneously actionable. So
Speaker 1: take the rest of the thirty minutes that would have
Speaker 1: been this episode and like call a friend or find
Speaker 1: a meeting, or do something to build out your frugal community,
Speaker 1: make your surroundings more frugal to set yourself up for
Speaker 1: short term and long term success. I like, there's your
Speaker 1: challenge for it? That was intention today this weekend? Yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure, for sure. We didn't just like talk really fast.
Speaker 1: So we are. It's the last day of May, and
Speaker 1: so we're finishing up The Soul of Money by Lynn
Speaker 1: Twist for book club and we'll be starting a new
Speaker 1: one next week and you'll just have to tune in
Speaker 1: to see what that one is. But if you still
Speaker 1: want a free copy, what are we still giving a
Speaker 1: free copy of The Soul of Money if you still
Speaker 1: want a free copy of that, because you can still
Speaker 1: read even if we're done reading it. And you can
Speaker 1: enter to win a free copy by leaving us a
Speaker 1: review on iTunes or Stitcher, then screenshot that review and
Speaker 1: email it to us. So our email is Frugal Friends
Speaker 1: Podcast at gmail dot com. And once we reach five reviews,
Speaker 1: for every five review we give away one book, So
Speaker 1: we'll select the winners at the end of the month
Speaker 1: depending on how many reviews we get. And if you
Speaker 1: want to know an example of a helpful review, here's
Speaker 1: our review of the week and it's from Gnulli Trek
Speaker 1: and uh it's titled still Listening, so five stars. It's
Speaker 1: five stars. She said, I wrote a bad review because
Speaker 1: I was annoyed by the ads. These ladies are running
Speaker 1: the joke. Ads are hilarious, but I hate real ads
Speaker 1: and sponsors in all contexts. In the most recent episode,
Speaker 1: they called out my bad review and reminded me it
Speaker 1: was here. Yeah. I'm clearly still listening to every episode
Speaker 1: and have grown to really love this podcast. I especially
Speaker 1: love the interview with Mrs Frugal Woods, who is a
Speaker 1: fave blogger of my Ignore the ads, everybody's got to
Speaker 1: make a living, but the content really is fab and
Speaker 1: I enjoy the banter well tracks. Honestly, you made I
Speaker 1: would I like I would say you made our week,
Speaker 1: but you've kind of made my my month slash year
Speaker 1: with that review. I could not believe it, honest to goodness,
Speaker 1: Jen and I were texting back, like when Eric found
Speaker 1: it and pointed out to us, and then Jen and
Speaker 1: I were just texting back and forth, obvious obviously tons
Speaker 1: of g I f s flying back and forth with
Speaker 1: just how amazing this was, Like who does that? Who
Speaker 1: goes back and says like I left a bad review,
Speaker 1: now I'm coming back with a good review, like talk
Speaker 1: about some courage and some just amazing character. I'm like,
Speaker 1: I just can't get over it. Thanks so much. You
Speaker 1: definitely definitely made our month with that one. And uh yeah,
Speaker 1: feel free to ignore our ads, feel free to feel
Speaker 1: free to fast forward through it. Yes, but I'm glad
Speaker 1: that you love the content and the banter. That's what
Speaker 1: we're really here for. Friends kind of ship. Yes, that's
Speaker 1: kind of ship brought to you by friendship. Glad you've
Speaker 1: turned into a friend, Nollie treks us. All Right, y'all,
Speaker 1: this has been a good one. Take this extra twenty
Speaker 1: minutes and go go find a friend. Find a friend,
Speaker 1: find a friendship that you don't have to hose down.
Speaker 1: And if you do have a friendship, don't pose it down.
Speaker 1: Only if I asked you to don't and I still don't. Okay, Well,
Speaker 1: bye bye Nextually. Frugal Friends is produced, edited and mixed
Speaker 1: by Eric Syrian. Oh goodness, right, I wonder how often
Speaker 1: people with ships need to hose it down? Like, how
Speaker 1: how relevant is that statement? Even like hosing down your ship? Um,
Speaker 1: I think it's actually relevant because you need to get
Speaker 1: the salt off of it. Although ships are different from boats,
Speaker 1: and I think I learned this, don't don't take this,
Speaker 1: but I think in order to be called a ship,
Speaker 1: you need to have you need to be like there
Speaker 1: needs to be other boats within your within yourself by
Speaker 1: saying that, like other vessels on board in order to
Speaker 1: be considered a ship. Okay, so must contain at least
Speaker 1: like one lifeboat in order to be considered a ship. Okay.
Speaker 1: I you think I would know that because I live
Speaker 1: on the water, but I don't. I have no clue
Speaker 1: because I don't have a boat or a ship. We
Speaker 1: will come live in Florida and we will bring our boat,
Speaker 1: and on our boat we will bring a raft, and
Speaker 1: then we will be called a ship and will be friends,
Speaker 1: having friendship on the ship of life boats. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: don't say that fast. I don't even think I can
Speaker 1: remember what I just said. I know I made a
Speaker 1: lot of boat references though. So you're welcome. Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: oh wow, I'm a lifesaver, life preserver. I'm I don't know.
Speaker 1: You can't just cut me, like, what is this? Are
Speaker 1: you doing this? I'm talking to myself right now because
Speaker 1: you because you cut me. Are you gonna start doing
Speaker 1: that in real life where you're just like, Okay, cut
Speaker 1: because we have a podcast together