WEBVTT - #132 How to be present in each moment

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<v Speaker 1>You can't change the past, you can't do anything about

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<v Speaker 1>the future. But what you could do is live right

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<v Speaker 1>now in this moment. And you go, well, what's this moment?

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<v Speaker 1>I would say aim low start at the foundation of

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<v Speaker 1>this moment is heartbeat and breathing. And sometimes that's all

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<v Speaker 1>you have. Sometimes the moment, the present moment you're in

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<v Speaker 1>is only a heartbeat and a breath, And so what

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<v Speaker 1>do you do there? Breathe the next one. Hey, guys,

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<v Speaker 1>welcome to the granger Smith Podcast. Thank you for coming

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<v Speaker 1>from wherever you figured out that we had a podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you for being here. We do this every single Monday.

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<v Speaker 1>I answer your questions. Could be about anything in life,

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<v Speaker 1>whatever it throws at you. We'll talk about it as

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<v Speaker 1>though we're sitting around a campfire and you come up

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<v Speaker 1>and you say, hey, man, I go to ask you

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<v Speaker 1>a question, something that's been kicking around with me for

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<v Speaker 1>a long time, or whatever. We will talk about it

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<v Speaker 1>is like we're old friends, and I hope you feel

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<v Speaker 1>that way. I'm not always right, but I'll tell you

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<v Speaker 1>my friend advice to you, and so if you have

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<v Speaker 1>a question for me, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com.

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<v Speaker 1>I have no idea. What's in the inbox today? I'm

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<v Speaker 1>gonna randomly go through these. I do not prepare and

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not ready for what I'm about to read, so

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<v Speaker 1>bear with me. We'll start with this one. The subject

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<v Speaker 1>line says podcast question of the week, Hey Grangeer, what

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<v Speaker 1>camera do you use for your podcast? My family and

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<v Speaker 1>I have watched all your episodes of The Smiths and

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<v Speaker 1>your podcast, and I appreciate you so much. Thank you

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<v Speaker 1>and yegee, this comes from Max and Hudson, North Carolina. Buddy,

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<v Speaker 1>thanks for emailing. That's a different question I haven't gotten

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<v Speaker 1>in a while. I use Sony cameras. In fact, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>using two of them right now. I'm looking at them.

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<v Speaker 1>One of them is the A seven three and one

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<v Speaker 1>of them is the A seven C. So A seven

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<v Speaker 1>three and A seven C. I use Sony lenses, Sony cameras.

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<v Speaker 1>They are the best. If you talk to any any vlogger,

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<v Speaker 1>most videographers that use a DSLR camera will use Sony

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<v Speaker 1>as well. So yeah, that's me. Next question says podcast question,

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<v Speaker 1>Hey Granger, can you give a twenty year old advice

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<v Speaker 1>about getting married, your first home, and getting starting getting

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<v Speaker 1>started in life? Whatever you would give thank you, buddy.

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<v Speaker 1>This comes from Chandler. Chandler man, I can't totally relate

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<v Speaker 1>to you. I got married at thirty, so it might

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<v Speaker 1>have been thirty one, thirty or thirty one some more

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<v Speaker 1>so I was about ten years past you in this journey.

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<v Speaker 1>I would my advice to you would be focus on

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<v Speaker 1>your new wife and not on your new home. I

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<v Speaker 1>think you could live anywhere and focus on her. And

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<v Speaker 1>you don't want that financial burden of stepping into something.

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<v Speaker 1>Stepping into a house that hasn't a little bit extra

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<v Speaker 1>payment that you're not sure you could make. It puts

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<v Speaker 1>pressure on you and her both to make sure that

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<v Speaker 1>you're bringing home the kind of income that you need.

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<v Speaker 1>And that's a pressure that you don't want. Early in

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<v Speaker 1>your twenties, early in any marriage, you don't want a

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<v Speaker 1>financial pressure. So make sure that wherever you go. And

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<v Speaker 1>I would not also not recommend living in the basement

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<v Speaker 1>at your mom's house. Don't do that either, So find

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<v Speaker 1>the compromise. Maybe it's a it's a decently priced apartment

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<v Speaker 1>and a good location where you could walk to get

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<v Speaker 1>some food or get easily to work. But I wouldn't

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<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't start thinking about dream homes. I don't like

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<v Speaker 1>the term dream homes. It's good to dream, and it's

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<v Speaker 1>good to dream about a home, but don't put a

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<v Speaker 1>specific picture to it. That's just my opinion. A lot

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<v Speaker 1>of people will tell you should manifest what you want

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<v Speaker 1>in life and man, you know, hang a picture of

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<v Speaker 1>your dream house on your wall and look at it

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<v Speaker 1>every day and eventually it'll come to you. I just

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not of that school of thinking. I'm more about

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<v Speaker 1>pouring into your wife, because there's going to be days

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<v Speaker 1>ahead when you're not able to pour in as well

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<v Speaker 1>as you can now as a newlywed, and so I

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<v Speaker 1>would focus on her and not on the house, and

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<v Speaker 1>not worry about the three kids that are coming in,

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<v Speaker 1>the dog in the yard, and the fence for the

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<v Speaker 1>dog in the yard, and the you know. I would

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<v Speaker 1>think as present as you can, and remember that you're

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<v Speaker 1>married to your wife, not to the place that y'all live.

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<v Speaker 1>For instance, you could move into an apartment and when

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<v Speaker 1>your leases up in six to twelve months, you can

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<v Speaker 1>get out of that apartment, and more than likely you

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<v Speaker 1>will amber and I moved several times, so you're not

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<v Speaker 1>making a commitment to your life right now. Eventually the

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<v Speaker 1>kids are here, you're ten years down the road, you're

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<v Speaker 1>going to start thinking more long term, and you're going

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<v Speaker 1>to think about the schools and the high school that

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<v Speaker 1>they're going to go to, and the education that they're

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<v Speaker 1>going to get in the friends that are around them

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<v Speaker 1>in the neighborhood. But right now, they're not here. So

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<v Speaker 1>you're as present as possible, and you pick the place

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<v Speaker 1>that takes the least financial burden but still is nice

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<v Speaker 1>and safe for your small family. Focus on her. I

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<v Speaker 1>think that the question could end there, but thank you, brother.

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<v Speaker 1>Flipping around here, no idea, what's coming up the subject,

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<v Speaker 1>client says, trying to move on. Hey, Granger Smith, I

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<v Speaker 1>just started to listening to your podcast, but I've been

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<v Speaker 1>a longtime fan. I'm twenty five years old. I lost

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<v Speaker 1>my dad a little over three years ago, and I've

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<v Speaker 1>been struggling with this loss greatly since then. But about

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<v Speaker 1>two months ago I dealt with another thing, a big heartbreak.

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<v Speaker 1>We met after I lost my dad and dated for

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<v Speaker 1>about a year and a half and we talked about

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<v Speaker 1>marriage and a future together. We began to grow apart

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<v Speaker 1>after I lost my job to COVID. I'm struggling with

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<v Speaker 1>what now feels like another big loss. Because we were

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<v Speaker 1>best friends. It seems so easy for him to move on,

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<v Speaker 1>but for me, I don't know how to move on.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm hoping you could give me some guidance from you

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<v Speaker 1>and maybe finding my way back to God after these losses.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks so much, Marissa. Marissa, You've got a lot going

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<v Speaker 1>on at twenty five. You're dealing with grief, you're dealing

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<v Speaker 1>with heartbreak, and you're dealing with the loss of a

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<v Speaker 1>job to COVID. That's the trifecta and you're right in

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<v Speaker 1>the middle of it. So first of all, I just

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<v Speaker 1>want to acknowledge the pain that you're having in the

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<v Speaker 1>struggle you're having is real and it's okay. So whatever

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<v Speaker 1>you're feeling right now is okay to feel that way.

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<v Speaker 1>You're not abnormal to think this. You're not abnormal to

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<v Speaker 1>think because of three years that you should be good

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<v Speaker 1>past your dad. You're not abnormal to think that after

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<v Speaker 1>two months of a heartbreak you should be good. Same

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<v Speaker 1>thing with losing a job to COVID. That's another loss,

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<v Speaker 1>and grief and heartbreak are close brothers, and you have

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<v Speaker 1>a little bit of both of those. With losing your job.

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<v Speaker 1>So don't minimize any of this, but do realize it's

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<v Speaker 1>a season, and this whole season will pass. And anytime

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<v Speaker 1>we go through these hard seasons, we realize that we're

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<v Speaker 1>getting better because of the season. We come out the

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<v Speaker 1>other side better because of it. And I use this

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<v Speaker 1>analogy all the time, but if you think about football,

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<v Speaker 1>you think about a team that wins the Super Bowl

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<v Speaker 1>and they hold up the trophy at the end, and

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<v Speaker 1>some of the guys are crying when they're holding up

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<v Speaker 1>the trophy, and you think, why are these grown men

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<v Speaker 1>crying over a stupid trophy. Well, it's not because of

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<v Speaker 1>the trophy, and it's really not because of the win either.

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<v Speaker 1>They're crying because of the struggle that they overcame, the

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<v Speaker 1>adversity that they got passed to get to this moment,

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<v Speaker 1>to the victory moment. That's what makes any victory sweeter

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<v Speaker 1>is because of the struggle. We are always better because

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<v Speaker 1>of the struggle. And you will be better because of

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<v Speaker 1>this struggle. You will learn, you will overcome, you will

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<v Speaker 1>endure this hardship in this adversity. Because how do I

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<v Speaker 1>know that, Because that's what humans do. We have a

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<v Speaker 1>history of doing this, going through the darkest times and

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<v Speaker 1>piecing things back together one puzzle piece at a time,

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<v Speaker 1>and we rebuild, and we rebuild stronger. That's hard to

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<v Speaker 1>hear right now. You hear that and you go, great,

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<v Speaker 1>those are great words. But I'm in the valley. I

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<v Speaker 1>can't see the peak right now. Well, life is never

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<v Speaker 1>only in the valley or only on the peak. Most

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<v Speaker 1>of it is in the trees right in between. And

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<v Speaker 1>we just need to keep our eyes up moving forward.

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<v Speaker 1>That's what we do. So if you have that kind

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<v Speaker 1>of mentality, like, man, I'm in pain today, I'm really

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<v Speaker 1>sad today, I'm really grieving today, I'm really insecure today.

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<v Speaker 1>The no, that's just today. You got to know this

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<v Speaker 1>is the moment I'm in. But tomorrow the sun's gonna

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<v Speaker 1>come up and I'm gonna have new opportunities and I'm

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<v Speaker 1>gonna be able to use what happened to me for

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<v Speaker 1>my advance. Say you're interviewing for a job and the

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<v Speaker 1>boss is saying, tell me about your life. What he's

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<v Speaker 1>getting at is what he wants to know really through

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<v Speaker 1>that question is what struggles have you gone through that

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<v Speaker 1>you overcame? Because that's what I want for this company.

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<v Speaker 1>The answer is that he doesn't want to hear is man.

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<v Speaker 1>I just everything in my life just falls into place.

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<v Speaker 1>Everything's been good. I mean, everything I've ever done just

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<v Speaker 1>works out, and I just keep growing. That's just no

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<v Speaker 1>one really wants to hear that story. No one writes

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<v Speaker 1>a book like that, no one makes a movie like that.

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<v Speaker 1>People want to hear that you struggled, you had adversity,

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<v Speaker 1>you overcame, and you became better because of it. That's

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<v Speaker 1>what the world wants to hear, because that is that's

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<v Speaker 1>the human story. So you're making yours right now. You're

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<v Speaker 1>in the story. You're in your future story that you

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<v Speaker 1>will tell one day and somebody goes, hey, Marissa, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>having problems and you can go let me hear them,

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<v Speaker 1>let me see if I could help work through these

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<v Speaker 1>problems with you. And they're gonna say, Marissa, but do

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<v Speaker 1>you even know what I'm going through? And you go,

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<v Speaker 1>let me tell you about twenty twenty when I lost

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<v Speaker 1>my job, I lost a close relationship, and I lost

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<v Speaker 1>my dad, all within a four year period. And let

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<v Speaker 1>me tell you that I'm not the person, I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>the woman I am today without those hardships think of

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<v Speaker 1>yourself in that situation, but to dig a little bit

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<v Speaker 1>deeper in the heartbreak. This heartbreak is tougher for you

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<v Speaker 1>because you bonded after you lost your dad. This guy,

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<v Speaker 1>whoever he was, he helped you understand all these these

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<v Speaker 1>crazy thoughts and feelings and grief that you had. He

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<v Speaker 1>helped walk through that and decompress it with you. So

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<v Speaker 1>when you lost him, you lost a piece of your

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<v Speaker 1>dad again. So that's why this heartbreaks a little bit tougher,

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<v Speaker 1>and knowing that helps you understand it more so when

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<v Speaker 1>you're laying there late at night and you go, I

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<v Speaker 1>miss him, I miss my boyfriend. I miss him, and

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<v Speaker 1>then the other side of your brain goes, let me

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<v Speaker 1>tell you a little bit more about why you do.

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<v Speaker 1>And that's the voice of reason that you can go, yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I understand why I miss him. It's not just random,

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<v Speaker 1>it's not just a piece of pain that's different than

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<v Speaker 1>anything else I've ever gone through. It makes sense, It matters, Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>I wish you the best. Thank you for emailing. This

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<v Speaker 1>podcast is sponsored by Better Help You Know. People don't

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<v Speaker 1>always realize that physical symptoms like headaches, teeth grinding, and

0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:51.880
<v Speaker 1>even digestive issues could be indicators of stress. And let's

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<v Speaker 1>not forget about doom scrolling, sleeping a little bit too late,

0:11:55.040 --> 0:11:58.559
<v Speaker 1>sleeping a little bit too much, under eating, and overeating.

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<v Speaker 1>It seems like a snowball for me, like I've got

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<v Speaker 1>so many things going on and so many things I'm

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<v Speaker 1>juggling that if I start losing grip on something like

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<v Speaker 1>sleep or eating less or eating more, maybe maybe work

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<v Speaker 1>is increasing in certain areas, then all of the rest

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<v Speaker 1>of the things I said start lacking as well. See

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<v Speaker 1>stress shows up in all kinds of ways, and a

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<v Speaker 1>world that's telling you to do more, sleep less, and

0:12:20.080 --> 0:12:22.720
<v Speaker 1>grind all the time. Here is your reminder to take

0:12:22.760 --> 0:12:25.800
<v Speaker 1>care of yourself, do less, and maybe try some therapy.

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<v Speaker 1>Better Help is customized online therapy that offers videos, phone,

0:12:30.280 --> 0:12:33.079
<v Speaker 1>and even live chat sessions with your therapist so you

0:12:33.120 --> 0:12:34.960
<v Speaker 1>don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't

0:12:34.960 --> 0:12:38.200
<v Speaker 1>want to. It's much more affordable than in person therapy,

0:12:38.240 --> 0:12:40.480
<v Speaker 1>so give it a try and see if online therapy

0:12:40.559 --> 0:12:44.840
<v Speaker 1>can help lower your stress. Grangersmith podcast listeners get ten

0:12:44.880 --> 0:12:48.000
<v Speaker 1>percent off their first month at better help dot com.

0:12:48.040 --> 0:12:51.640
<v Speaker 1>Slash granger that's better Help B E. T. T. E

0:12:51.800 --> 0:13:00.480
<v Speaker 1>R H E LP dot com slash granger subject lines help,

0:13:00.880 --> 0:13:02.800
<v Speaker 1>Hey grangdeer. I messaged you on Instagram, but I know

0:13:02.840 --> 0:13:04.760
<v Speaker 1>you got a lot. I know that was a long shot,

0:13:05.320 --> 0:13:07.199
<v Speaker 1>and I thought I would have a better chance sending

0:13:07.200 --> 0:13:10.800
<v Speaker 1>you this email. I lost my sweet baby boy, Lane

0:13:10.840 --> 0:13:13.800
<v Speaker 1>Evans Wallace on Friday. He just turned four months old.

0:13:14.320 --> 0:13:16.199
<v Speaker 1>I want to give up, but I know that he

0:13:16.200 --> 0:13:18.600
<v Speaker 1>wouldn't want that. I know he's in a better place,

0:13:18.640 --> 0:13:21.480
<v Speaker 1>but I still don't know how to move forward. He

0:13:21.600 --> 0:13:25.480
<v Speaker 1>was my world. I know you've been through this and

0:13:26.000 --> 0:13:28.679
<v Speaker 1>I know it doesn't get any harder than this, but

0:13:28.720 --> 0:13:31.840
<v Speaker 1>I just need to know when will it ever get

0:13:31.880 --> 0:13:36.320
<v Speaker 1>easier and when will I be okay again? Question comes

0:13:36.320 --> 0:13:41.240
<v Speaker 1>from Billy Wallace. Billy, I'm so sorry, brother. This email

0:13:41.320 --> 0:13:45.240
<v Speaker 1>came in March, so you are at the end of March,

0:13:45.320 --> 0:13:50.080
<v Speaker 1>so you're about a month separated from when this happened,

0:13:52.240 --> 0:13:55.120
<v Speaker 1>and I would imagine that you have a better understanding

0:13:55.160 --> 0:13:57.400
<v Speaker 1>now after the month that's gone by when you hear

0:13:57.440 --> 0:14:03.240
<v Speaker 1>this podcast. But the answer it's not going to be

0:14:03.400 --> 0:14:06.280
<v Speaker 1>that different than the last question I just read for

0:14:07.640 --> 0:14:13.800
<v Speaker 1>because the only thing you can do, Billy is stay

0:14:13.880 --> 0:14:17.520
<v Speaker 1>as present as you can. You can't change the past,

0:14:18.679 --> 0:14:21.280
<v Speaker 1>you can't do anything about the future. But what you

0:14:21.320 --> 0:14:24.400
<v Speaker 1>could do is live right now in this moment. And

0:14:24.400 --> 0:14:27.320
<v Speaker 1>you go, well, what's this moment? I would say, aim

0:14:27.400 --> 0:14:32.200
<v Speaker 1>low start at the foundation of this moment is heartbeat

0:14:32.280 --> 0:14:38.200
<v Speaker 1>and breathing, and sometimes that's all you have. Sometimes the moment,

0:14:38.240 --> 0:14:41.440
<v Speaker 1>the present moment you're in, is only a heartbeat and

0:14:41.480 --> 0:14:45.040
<v Speaker 1>a breath, and so what do you do there? Breathe

0:14:45.040 --> 0:14:50.080
<v Speaker 1>the next one and you go, Granger, that's just too simple.

0:14:50.520 --> 0:14:53.440
<v Speaker 1>I'm telling you, I've been through this, and sometimes the

0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:56.320
<v Speaker 1>most present moment you could be in has the most

0:14:56.360 --> 0:14:59.720
<v Speaker 1>peace in it. I believe that God lives presently with

0:14:59.800 --> 0:15:03.520
<v Speaker 1>us because God is outside of space and time. So God,

0:15:03.840 --> 0:15:05.840
<v Speaker 1>God doesn't live only in the past, and he doesn't

0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:08.640
<v Speaker 1>only live in the future. He lives with us right now.

0:15:08.680 --> 0:15:12.440
<v Speaker 1>In fact, the Bible says, I am tell them my

0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:17.520
<v Speaker 1>name as I am, meaning I am presently with you.

0:15:17.840 --> 0:15:20.800
<v Speaker 1>I'm right here in this moment. I think I believe

0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:23.000
<v Speaker 1>that's where God exists, and I believe once we get

0:15:23.000 --> 0:15:27.520
<v Speaker 1>to that moment, that's where in constant chaos around us,

0:15:28.200 --> 0:15:31.600
<v Speaker 1>the chaos of what's coming, the chaos of what just happened.

0:15:32.040 --> 0:15:36.280
<v Speaker 1>The most peace is right here. Sometimes that means, to

0:15:36.360 --> 0:15:39.440
<v Speaker 1>be more specific, I could be driving in my truck

0:15:40.200 --> 0:15:42.520
<v Speaker 1>and I need to be present, so I want to

0:15:42.560 --> 0:15:45.880
<v Speaker 1>feel the steering will in my hands. I want to

0:15:45.920 --> 0:15:50.720
<v Speaker 1>feel what does that leather feel like under my palms. Literally,

0:15:50.720 --> 0:15:53.920
<v Speaker 1>that's how present you can get. I'm not gonna worry.

0:15:53.960 --> 0:15:55.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm not gonna worry. I got this thing coming up,

0:15:56.520 --> 0:15:59.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm not gonna worry about it. I got this thing

0:15:59.040 --> 0:16:02.080
<v Speaker 1>that just happened. I'm not gonna think about it because

0:16:02.120 --> 0:16:05.600
<v Speaker 1>I'm not there in either of those situations. I'm right here.

0:16:06.240 --> 0:16:10.840
<v Speaker 1>I got my hands clapped around this steeringwhell. I'm holding

0:16:10.840 --> 0:16:14.200
<v Speaker 1>this steeringwhell. That's what I'm doing. I feel my foot

0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:18.080
<v Speaker 1>on the accelerator pedal. I am so present. There's the

0:16:18.120 --> 0:16:21.440
<v Speaker 1>next breath. That's how present I am. There's another breath,

0:16:22.400 --> 0:16:26.240
<v Speaker 1>and live there as long as you can. Don't allow

0:16:26.280 --> 0:16:28.320
<v Speaker 1>yourself to go in the past, don't allow yourself to

0:16:28.360 --> 0:16:32.280
<v Speaker 1>worry about the future. Stay in the present. You can't

0:16:32.360 --> 0:16:34.480
<v Speaker 1>live here because then you couldn't plan, and you couldn't

0:16:34.520 --> 0:16:36.680
<v Speaker 1>learn from the past, and you couldn't plan for the future.

0:16:36.720 --> 0:16:39.760
<v Speaker 1>But when things are tough when the world is closing in,

0:16:39.840 --> 0:16:42.800
<v Speaker 1>as you said, when you just don't want to be

0:16:42.840 --> 0:16:48.280
<v Speaker 1>here anymore, be in the present and feel the calm

0:16:48.280 --> 0:16:51.800
<v Speaker 1>of that, feel the peace of that. There's a lot

0:16:51.840 --> 0:16:54.440
<v Speaker 1>more to this answer, but right now I feel like

0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:56.680
<v Speaker 1>that's the one you need to hear, and then we'll

0:16:56.720 --> 0:17:01.960
<v Speaker 1>touch base on where to go from there. Okay, subject

0:17:01.960 --> 0:17:05.000
<v Speaker 1>line here says stay or dump. Hey, Grangeer, my name

0:17:05.040 --> 0:17:07.879
<v Speaker 1>is Ellie. I'm fourteen years old. Oh excuse me, this

0:17:08.000 --> 0:17:10.840
<v Speaker 1>is Eli. My name is Eli and I'm fourteen years old.

0:17:10.920 --> 0:17:14.600
<v Speaker 1>I'm from Nicholsville, Kentucky, and I have a really big

0:17:14.640 --> 0:17:16.840
<v Speaker 1>hobby sport that I attend. I'm on the high school

0:17:16.840 --> 0:17:22.200
<v Speaker 1>trap shooting team in Kentucky, and my best friends I've

0:17:22.200 --> 0:17:25.640
<v Speaker 1>known forever have stopped supporting me because the sport has

0:17:25.840 --> 0:17:29.159
<v Speaker 1>shotguns in it. I'm at a loss if I should

0:17:29.200 --> 0:17:32.359
<v Speaker 1>just ignore them and still be friends or get rid

0:17:32.400 --> 0:17:36.120
<v Speaker 1>of them and welcome new friends into my life. That's

0:17:36.200 --> 0:17:38.760
<v Speaker 1>not what I was expecting from the subject line saying

0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:43.400
<v Speaker 1>stay or dump, Eli. Thanks for emailing buddy, Thanks for

0:17:43.520 --> 0:17:47.320
<v Speaker 1>listening to the podcast. Fourteen Man, you got a lot

0:17:47.680 --> 0:17:50.200
<v Speaker 1>a lot changing right now at age fourteen, a lot.

0:17:50.800 --> 0:17:52.240
<v Speaker 1>A lot of things are going to change over the

0:17:52.320 --> 0:17:54.359
<v Speaker 1>next six months, A lot of things are going to

0:17:54.440 --> 0:17:57.240
<v Speaker 1>change in two years when you're sixteen. A whole lot's

0:17:57.240 --> 0:17:58.879
<v Speaker 1>going to change by the time you turn eighteen, and

0:17:58.920 --> 0:18:02.000
<v Speaker 1>you're fourteen. You're fourteen now, and by the time you

0:18:02.040 --> 0:18:11.760
<v Speaker 1>turn eighteen. So this shotgun thing that's so interesting to me,

0:18:12.359 --> 0:18:16.160
<v Speaker 1>I think I would lead with this, Eli. I would

0:18:16.240 --> 0:18:18.639
<v Speaker 1>lead by the friends that you've known for a long time.

0:18:20.119 --> 0:18:25.440
<v Speaker 1>I would ask you to help explain how you love

0:18:25.680 --> 0:18:29.399
<v Speaker 1>trap shooting on this team, and how passionate about it

0:18:29.480 --> 0:18:33.480
<v Speaker 1>you are. Explain to them the purpose of the shotgun

0:18:33.560 --> 0:18:38.120
<v Speaker 1>in this activity and the joy and happiness you get

0:18:38.160 --> 0:18:41.480
<v Speaker 1>out of it. And you're kind of good at it, right,

0:18:41.560 --> 0:18:43.480
<v Speaker 1>You wouldn't be doing this unless you're pretty good at it,

0:18:43.520 --> 0:18:45.600
<v Speaker 1>So explain to them too, Like, man, I'm actually pretty

0:18:45.600 --> 0:18:47.600
<v Speaker 1>good at it and I love it. And I would

0:18:47.640 --> 0:18:50.959
<v Speaker 1>love for you guys to come and visit me one

0:18:51.040 --> 0:18:54.240
<v Speaker 1>day and watch me shoot. And I think if you

0:18:54.320 --> 0:19:00.320
<v Speaker 1>watched me, the whole idea that you're having problems with

0:19:00.400 --> 0:19:03.720
<v Speaker 1>would slowly go away because you would see, Hey, this

0:19:03.760 --> 0:19:06.280
<v Speaker 1>is a sport and you guys are my friends. I

0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:09.199
<v Speaker 1>love you guys, Man, I love hanging out with you.

0:19:09.200 --> 0:19:11.280
<v Speaker 1>You guys have been there for me. I've been there

0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:14.720
<v Speaker 1>for you. I feel a bond with you, guys, And

0:19:15.640 --> 0:19:19.000
<v Speaker 1>because I love this sport, I want you guys to

0:19:19.760 --> 0:19:22.040
<v Speaker 1>enjoy it with me. So can you just come and

0:19:22.080 --> 0:19:29.760
<v Speaker 1>watch now? Eli? If those guys say absolutely not, you

0:19:29.920 --> 0:19:33.760
<v Speaker 1>do that, we're not friends? Okay, good, Well there's your answer.

0:19:34.000 --> 0:19:38.320
<v Speaker 1>You know, it's like, really like, I love this and

0:19:38.359 --> 0:19:41.280
<v Speaker 1>there's nothing technically wrong with it and this is a

0:19:41.320 --> 0:19:45.600
<v Speaker 1>passion of mine. If you don't, then maybe we're growing

0:19:45.600 --> 0:19:48.960
<v Speaker 1>a part as friends, which happens at fourteen, Like maybe

0:19:48.960 --> 0:19:51.240
<v Speaker 1>we're not as close as I thought we were. Maybe

0:19:51.520 --> 0:19:55.359
<v Speaker 1>our ideas are not as aligned as I thought they were.

0:19:56.200 --> 0:19:58.959
<v Speaker 1>So at that point, guess where you're gonna find friends?

0:20:00.240 --> 0:20:04.320
<v Speaker 1>At trapshooting? That's pretty easy. You're gonna see guys out

0:20:04.320 --> 0:20:08.120
<v Speaker 1>there that love what you love and you're gonna say, hey,

0:20:08.119 --> 0:20:10.760
<v Speaker 1>I'm Eli, you love this, and they're gonna go, yeah,

0:20:10.800 --> 0:20:13.480
<v Speaker 1>I love it. You go. We should do this more often.

0:20:13.520 --> 0:20:16.520
<v Speaker 1>We should go and grab some pizza tonight. Yeah, I

0:20:16.640 --> 0:20:20.320
<v Speaker 1>love pizza. Let's do it. Let's grab a movie. Boom,

0:20:20.320 --> 0:20:23.800
<v Speaker 1>you got new friends and slowly day by day those

0:20:23.880 --> 0:20:27.080
<v Speaker 1>will become good friends. Now, I'm not telling you have

0:20:27.119 --> 0:20:28.480
<v Speaker 1>to give up on the other guys, but you just

0:20:28.560 --> 0:20:31.439
<v Speaker 1>need to understand it. If they don't want to be

0:20:31.440 --> 0:20:33.879
<v Speaker 1>friends with you because of this thing that you do,

0:20:33.920 --> 0:20:37.280
<v Speaker 1>which I believe is not a bad thing, maybe they

0:20:37.280 --> 0:20:42.639
<v Speaker 1>weren't friends to begin with. Sometimes think about Thanks for

0:20:42.720 --> 0:20:45.879
<v Speaker 1>joining me on the Grangersmith Podcast. I appreciate all of

0:20:45.920 --> 0:20:48.000
<v Speaker 1>you guys. You could help me out by rating this

0:20:48.119 --> 0:20:52.199
<v Speaker 1>podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel,

0:20:52.400 --> 0:20:55.639
<v Speaker 1>hit that little like button and notification spell so that

0:20:55.720 --> 0:20:59.439
<v Speaker 1>you never miss anytime I upload a video. If you

0:20:59.440 --> 0:21:01.040
<v Speaker 1>have a question for me that you would like me

0:21:01.080 --> 0:21:06.800
<v Speaker 1>to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Ye