1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:04,920 Speaker 1: All right. Today Strawberry Letter is brought to you by 2 00:00:05,120 --> 00:00:09,159 Speaker 1: the all New twenty twenty one Meet San Rogue. You 3 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:13,960 Speaker 1: are right, nephew. It's built for families and it's ready 4 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:17,599 Speaker 1: for all types of rogue adventures. With five drive modes. 5 00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:22,000 Speaker 1: It is so versatile and can go almost anywhere. We 6 00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:24,919 Speaker 1: love it. We love it around here. Let's go rogue 7 00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:29,159 Speaker 1: with today's Strawberry Letter. They're always rogue right. If you 8 00:00:29,240 --> 00:00:33,280 Speaker 1: needed life on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting and more, 9 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:36,760 Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com 10 00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:40,559 Speaker 1: and click Submit Strawberry LETTA. We could be reading your 11 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:42,880 Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read 12 00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:46,240 Speaker 1: this one right here, right now. Buggle up and hold 13 00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:48,160 Speaker 1: on tight. We got it for you here at ease. 14 00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:52,360 Speaker 1: The Strawberbery Letter subject. I couldn't give her a baby, 15 00:00:52,479 --> 00:00:55,840 Speaker 1: but he did. Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm a fifty three 16 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:59,280 Speaker 1: year old man and my fiance is thirty five. We've 17 00:00:59,280 --> 00:01:01,720 Speaker 1: been together for four years, and from the beginning she 18 00:01:01,840 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 1: told me she wanted to be a mother. I was 19 00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:08,319 Speaker 1: married before, and I've got three children and I've had 20 00:01:08,319 --> 00:01:11,959 Speaker 1: a vasectomy. As our relationship got serious, I told her 21 00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:15,680 Speaker 1: I could get my vasectomy reversed and I would give 22 00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:18,480 Speaker 1: her a baby. I visited my doctor and I was 23 00:01:18,560 --> 00:01:20,720 Speaker 1: told that I had a bit of scar tissue from 24 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:24,040 Speaker 1: the surgery, so it could not be reversed. I was 25 00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:26,720 Speaker 1: scared to tell my girlfriend, thinking it would be a 26 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:29,400 Speaker 1: deal breaker, but she took the news well and told 27 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:32,000 Speaker 1: me there are many other ways for her to have 28 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:35,800 Speaker 1: a baby. I didn't really think about what she said, 29 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:39,160 Speaker 1: but a few months later I saw what she meant. 30 00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 1: I had just proposed, and I got a hotel suite 31 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:46,640 Speaker 1: to celebrate. She threw up all night and she didn't 32 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:50,000 Speaker 1: drink any champagne. The next morning, I asked her if 33 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:53,280 Speaker 1: she was pregnant, and she admitted that she was. She 34 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:57,040 Speaker 1: told me she'd been thinking about her biological clock ticking, 35 00:01:57,200 --> 00:02:00,280 Speaker 1: so she took matters into her own hands and asked 36 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:05,040 Speaker 1: her boyfriend to go half on a baby. Her ex boyfriend. Yeah, 37 00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:09,800 Speaker 1: that's her ex boyfriend. That's very important. I couldn't believe it. 38 00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:12,720 Speaker 1: But what's more shocking than that is the fact that 39 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:16,280 Speaker 1: I'm still with her despite what my friends and families think. 40 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:19,480 Speaker 1: I'm going to support her and raise the child. The 41 00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:22,160 Speaker 1: only problem is that her ex boyfriend doesn't want me 42 00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:24,720 Speaker 1: to adopt the baby. He wants the child to have 43 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,200 Speaker 1: his last name. Should I fight him on this or 44 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:31,160 Speaker 1: should I cancel my wedding plans and let them raise 45 00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:35,760 Speaker 1: their child together. I say no, do not fight him 46 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:39,239 Speaker 1: on anything. Your fight is not with him, it's with her, 47 00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:43,440 Speaker 1: your trifling fiance. Sorry to say that, but she's the 48 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:48,280 Speaker 1: one that brought her ex into this situation and he's 49 00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 1: making demands now. I mean, I think this is such 50 00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:55,680 Speaker 1: a selfish move on her part. And on the other hand, 51 00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:59,320 Speaker 1: you offer to reverse your vasectomy for her, offer to 52 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:03,000 Speaker 1: raise the child with her. I think you're a really 53 00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:06,680 Speaker 1: good man. I think you are. She knew you had 54 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:09,280 Speaker 1: a vasectomy. I'm sure when you guys got together, you've 55 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:12,520 Speaker 1: been together for four years. She's created this big mess. 56 00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:15,399 Speaker 1: I think she should have discussed her options with you 57 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:19,079 Speaker 1: and you guys, meaning you and her, could have discussed 58 00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 1: this and decided on this together. I think her ex 59 00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:26,240 Speaker 1: needs to back up. The baby isn't even born yet, 60 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:30,520 Speaker 1: so he doesn't have any rights right now. She's married 61 00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:33,000 Speaker 1: to you, or she's going to get married to you. 62 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:37,120 Speaker 1: I think he's causing major problems, and he will when 63 00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:39,200 Speaker 1: the baby gets here. I think it's up to you 64 00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 1: if you want him in the baby's life. But really, 65 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:45,400 Speaker 1: I say to you, let her go, Let her go. 66 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:49,000 Speaker 1: I mean, this is a mess, and she created it. 67 00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:51,800 Speaker 1: I think there are plenty of women who want a 68 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 1: good man like you the length you would go to 69 00:03:54,440 --> 00:03:57,080 Speaker 1: for this woman. I'm sure if you love someone else, 70 00:03:57,080 --> 00:03:59,040 Speaker 1: you would do the same thing. I think, yes, she 71 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,320 Speaker 1: and her ex can raise this baby together since they 72 00:04:02,360 --> 00:04:06,280 Speaker 1: got together without your knowledge and uh, you know, created 73 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:16,520 Speaker 1: this baby. Steve, I have a different take on this letter. 74 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:21,200 Speaker 1: First of all, bro, I couldn't give her a baby, 75 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:24,000 Speaker 1: but she did. The fifty three year old man got 76 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:27,320 Speaker 1: a fiance thirty five. That's what you call age reversal. 77 00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:31,320 Speaker 1: You know, at sixty two, I was working out with 78 00:04:31,360 --> 00:04:34,920 Speaker 1: my assistant who was twenty six. That's age reversal. That's 79 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:37,000 Speaker 1: you know, you have some of those ages. Like if 80 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:40,280 Speaker 1: you're seventy three and you know somebody thirty seven, you know, 81 00:04:40,279 --> 00:04:42,280 Speaker 1: it's a little funny little thing. If you're twenty five 82 00:04:42,720 --> 00:04:45,520 Speaker 1: and you know somebody fifty two, it's called age reversal. 83 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:48,400 Speaker 1: A fun thing I do sometimes with people i'm around, 84 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:53,159 Speaker 1: just called age reversal when your relationship. That's tough because 85 00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:58,360 Speaker 1: that age reversal is real. So now she wants something 86 00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:02,000 Speaker 1: that you can't give her baby because you had a 87 00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:04,080 Speaker 1: visecting me because you was married before and you got 88 00:05:04,120 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 1: three kids. Now you can't get to visecting me undone 89 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:10,000 Speaker 1: because you got some scar tissue. So you go and 90 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,000 Speaker 1: you tell her, but you're scared to tell her because 91 00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:16,599 Speaker 1: you think it's a deal breaker. And it was. It 92 00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:20,400 Speaker 1: was exactly that, a damn deal breaker. But she took 93 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:26,280 Speaker 1: the news weather well you know why because she went, okay, 94 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:32,599 Speaker 1: that ain't got nothing to do with me. And then 95 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,400 Speaker 1: she told you it was other ways to have a baby. 96 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:43,480 Speaker 1: What out of the way. If you got a vasecting me, 97 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:47,040 Speaker 1: it's the only other way to have a baby, ain't 98 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:51,280 Speaker 1: gonna had nothing to do with you. So I said, okay, bro, 99 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:54,040 Speaker 1: I ain't whatever you are, you ain't think nothing about it. 100 00:05:55,680 --> 00:05:58,720 Speaker 1: Then you proposed to her. You got a hotel suite. 101 00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:03,239 Speaker 1: She threw up all night, didn't drink no champagne. Next morning, 102 00:06:03,240 --> 00:06:05,640 Speaker 1: you asked her if she was pregnant, and she admitted 103 00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:10,279 Speaker 1: she was. It's a lot missing in this letter, but okay, dog, 104 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:17,480 Speaker 1: she just said, yeah. She told me that she'd been 105 00:06:17,520 --> 00:06:21,640 Speaker 1: thinking about her biological clock, so she took matters into 106 00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:27,560 Speaker 1: her own hands and asked her ex boyfriend to go 107 00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:32,159 Speaker 1: half on the baby. The next line this dude wrote was, 108 00:06:32,279 --> 00:06:38,320 Speaker 1: I couldn't believe it. It's so much in this letter. 109 00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:41,760 Speaker 1: I can't believe. I can't believe you had the first 110 00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:45,920 Speaker 1: moment of disbelief in this damn letter. I come back on, 111 00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:49,160 Speaker 1: straighten it all out. Part two of Steve's response, coming 112 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:51,160 Speaker 1: up at twenty three minutes after I couldn't give her 113 00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:53,680 Speaker 1: a baby, but he did. Coming back right after this 114 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:58,960 Speaker 1: you're listening show, All right, Steve, come on, let's recap 115 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:02,159 Speaker 1: today's strawberry. The subject I couldn't give her a baby, 116 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:05,120 Speaker 1: but he did. So this fifty three year old man 117 00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:09,280 Speaker 1: got a fiance. This thirty five age reversal don't ever 118 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:14,360 Speaker 1: work out. Usually she won't have a baby. But he'd 119 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:16,800 Speaker 1: been married before and he got three kids, so he 120 00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 1: had a vasectomy. Then the relationship got serious between him 121 00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:23,480 Speaker 1: and the young girl, and she wanted to have a baby, 122 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:26,640 Speaker 1: so he said he would get his vasectomy reversed. He 123 00:07:26,720 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 1: went to the doctor. He got some scar tissue, so 124 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:31,800 Speaker 1: he came reverse to surgery. He was scared to tell 125 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:34,240 Speaker 1: his girlfriend because she thought it would be who thought 126 00:07:34,240 --> 00:07:36,840 Speaker 1: it would be a deal breaker? We find out it was. 127 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:40,240 Speaker 1: He told her. She took the news rather well and 128 00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:42,200 Speaker 1: then said to him soon as he told him that 129 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:47,320 Speaker 1: there's other ways, you know, to have a baby, Well, 130 00:07:47,360 --> 00:07:51,160 Speaker 1: I didn't really think about it, and so then for 131 00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:54,280 Speaker 1: a few months, then he found out where she meant. 132 00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:58,400 Speaker 1: He just proposed to this woman. They got a hotel 133 00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:03,040 Speaker 1: room to celebrate. She threw up all night. She ain't 134 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:06,920 Speaker 1: drank no champagne. The next morning I asked her if 135 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:11,400 Speaker 1: she was pregnant. She admitted that she was. She told 136 00:08:11,480 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 1: me that she'd been thinking about her biological clock. So 137 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,120 Speaker 1: she took matters into her own hands. Here we go 138 00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:27,600 Speaker 1: and asked her ex boyfriend to go half on the baby. 139 00:08:28,640 --> 00:08:30,600 Speaker 1: Then the dude in the letter, guess what he said. 140 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:38,679 Speaker 1: I couldn't believe it old yeah, but now his was 141 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:42,240 Speaker 1: more shocking than that. He said, it's the fact that 142 00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:46,160 Speaker 1: I'm still with her despite what my friends and family think. 143 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:50,320 Speaker 1: I'm going to support her and raise the child. What okay, food, 144 00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:53,880 Speaker 1: see this this way, I have to not look. Let's 145 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:57,160 Speaker 1: listen to me. Y'all can think it's noble and all 146 00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:59,720 Speaker 1: of that if you want to. But they wrote in 147 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:03,240 Speaker 1: Destrawberry letter to me and Shelly, I thank you a 148 00:09:03,480 --> 00:09:07,400 Speaker 1: damn fool? What is wrong with you? You know Sherley 149 00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:09,960 Speaker 1: can have her opinion, and because there's nobody right in 150 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:12,280 Speaker 1: this letter, you have to right to your opinion. But 151 00:09:12,320 --> 00:09:15,520 Speaker 1: I see this totally different. Man. First of all, man, 152 00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:19,880 Speaker 1: what the hell are you talking about? And then come 153 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:24,600 Speaker 1: talking about and and despite what my friends and family think, 154 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:26,680 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna support me with Why are you telling 155 00:09:26,679 --> 00:09:32,640 Speaker 1: everybody you're stupid? Right there? Your friends and family, man, 156 00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:34,760 Speaker 1: you know she didn't win and have this baby on me, 157 00:09:34,800 --> 00:09:36,840 Speaker 1: But I'm gonna raised it and support it because you 158 00:09:36,880 --> 00:09:38,559 Speaker 1: know what a lot of your friends and family that 159 00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:42,480 Speaker 1: saying what I said, You're a damn fool. What's wrong 160 00:09:42,559 --> 00:09:48,440 Speaker 1: with you? Man? What the trust factor here? The deceit here? What? 161 00:09:48,679 --> 00:09:52,400 Speaker 1: When was she gonna tell you she was pregnant? Right? 162 00:09:53,600 --> 00:09:57,200 Speaker 1: When was she gonna tell you she was just gonna 163 00:09:57,240 --> 00:10:00,720 Speaker 1: show up and start showing when? And was she gonna 164 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:03,640 Speaker 1: tell you? Dog? And you gotta vsector me that can't 165 00:10:03,640 --> 00:10:06,320 Speaker 1: be reversed. You can't have a baby. When was she 166 00:10:06,440 --> 00:10:09,720 Speaker 1: gonna tell you. Why did she not bring the plan 167 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:12,880 Speaker 1: to you to see if it was okay with you? 168 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:16,520 Speaker 1: Because she didn't care what you thought. You took your 169 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:18,760 Speaker 1: old ass down and find out you couldn't get the 170 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:21,559 Speaker 1: visectim me reverse. Now you're not talking me thought it 171 00:10:21,559 --> 00:10:24,679 Speaker 1: would be a deal breakup. Now here's the look, Now 172 00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:29,000 Speaker 1: here's the problem. The only problem is this the only problem? Boy? 173 00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:31,719 Speaker 1: There's so many problems in this damn letter. He get 174 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:34,000 Speaker 1: down to the bottom. He say, the only problem is 175 00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:38,719 Speaker 1: that her ex boyfriend doesn't want me to adopt a baby. 176 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,320 Speaker 1: He wants a child to have his name. Should I 177 00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,760 Speaker 1: fight him on this? Or should I cancel my wedding 178 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:49,120 Speaker 1: plans and let them raise their child together? Wait a minute, man, 179 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:52,360 Speaker 1: let's go back. The only problem is that her ex 180 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:59,839 Speaker 1: boyfriend doesn't want me to adopt a baby. It's his baby. 181 00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:04,600 Speaker 1: This is what you don't understand. This ex boyfriend ain't 182 00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:09,800 Speaker 1: creating a problem. This ex boyfriend is going along with 183 00:11:09,840 --> 00:11:13,840 Speaker 1: what he said he was gonna do. See you stupid? Now, 184 00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:17,840 Speaker 1: should I fight him? Fight him? Fight him with what? 185 00:11:18,760 --> 00:11:22,480 Speaker 1: It's his baby. He don't want you to adopt it. 186 00:11:22,559 --> 00:11:24,959 Speaker 1: He wants the baby to have his last name because 187 00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:29,560 Speaker 1: it's his damn baby, and should you fight him? And 188 00:11:29,679 --> 00:11:32,280 Speaker 1: do you know why the ex boyfriend don't want you 189 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:34,480 Speaker 1: to adopt the baby? Do you know why the ex 190 00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:38,240 Speaker 1: boyfriend wants the baby to have his last name? Because 191 00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:44,800 Speaker 1: you don't know what the agreement was between your fiance 192 00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:48,880 Speaker 1: and her ex boyfriend when she proposed to him to 193 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:53,160 Speaker 1: go half on the baby. What the hell does that mean? 194 00:11:54,520 --> 00:11:58,800 Speaker 1: This is a life, man, This ain't a car. You 195 00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:01,960 Speaker 1: ain't written a part. Admit nowhere. Let's go half on 196 00:12:02,080 --> 00:12:07,080 Speaker 1: the red. You try to calm Thursdays and Wednesdays. I 197 00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:10,600 Speaker 1: get it on a weak head. This is a baby. 198 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 1: You can't go half on the baby. That's a song. Yes, 199 00:12:16,559 --> 00:12:24,120 Speaker 1: that's a stupid ass song. Yeah, listen to me. You 200 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:27,959 Speaker 1: don't even know what the agreement was, bro, So you're 201 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:30,640 Speaker 1: losing this battle. And then he don't want you to 202 00:12:30,679 --> 00:12:34,160 Speaker 1: adopt a baby. You can't adopt a baby that belongs 203 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:37,200 Speaker 1: to another man who wants to be in his life. 204 00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:41,000 Speaker 1: You don't have a fight here, dog. He wants to 205 00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:44,360 Speaker 1: hit child to have his last name because it's his 206 00:12:46,679 --> 00:12:49,520 Speaker 1: and they went half on the baby. Should I fight 207 00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:51,840 Speaker 1: for him? Or should I cancel my wedding plane. You 208 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:54,880 Speaker 1: don't have no wedding dog. You ain't got no wife. 209 00:12:56,840 --> 00:13:01,439 Speaker 1: And I let them raise their child together. Yeah, ain't no. 210 00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:03,360 Speaker 1: Did she come to you and ask you to help 211 00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:06,240 Speaker 1: raise it? You volunteered to raise the child. She didn't 212 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:09,200 Speaker 1: ask you that, all right? Coming up at forty six 213 00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:11,320 Speaker 1: minutes after the hour, we'll have more of the Steve 214 00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:15,160 Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show right after this. You're listening to the 215 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:16,760 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show.