1
00:00:02,480 --> 00:00:08,039
Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Nation. Today are primaries in New York, Oklahoma,

2
00:00:08,119 --> 00:00:11,239
Speaker 1: and Florida. Please get out and vote. If you need

3
00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:15,440
Speaker 1: to register for the upcoming November midterms, go to when

4
00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:19,080
Speaker 1: we All Vote dot org. When we All Vote dot org.

5
00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:23,200
Speaker 1: Let's get serious about this voting and do our job.

6
00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:26,120
Speaker 1: We gotta do what we gotta do. We gotta do this, Okay,

7
00:00:26,400 --> 00:00:30,520
Speaker 1: come on Florida. Yeah, we show up for the generals.

8
00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:33,840
Speaker 1: We gotta show up for the midterms as well. All right,

9
00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:36,360
Speaker 1: and we're gonna switch gears. It is time now for

10
00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:40,720
Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter. If you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,

11
00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:44,720
Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM

12
00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:47,879
Speaker 1: dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be

13
00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:50,640
Speaker 1: reading your letter live on the air, just like we're

14
00:00:50,680 --> 00:00:52,839
Speaker 1: gonna read this one right here, right now, and you

15
00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:55,680
Speaker 1: never know, it could be yours, all right to have

16
00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:58,760
Speaker 1: for another free job here it is to have the

17
00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:04,800
Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter. My good, fresh, shirless strowberry. Give Junior a raid?

18
00:01:04,880 --> 00:01:09,240
Speaker 1: Thank you, jor subject why does he keep me around?

19
00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:12,440
Speaker 1: Dear Stephen Shirley, My husband and I have been married

20
00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:16,080
Speaker 1: for fourteen years and were hanging on by a thread.

21
00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:19,640
Speaker 1: We have two children, and sometimes I wonder if that's

22
00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:23,080
Speaker 1: why he stays with me. We never talk about our problems.

23
00:01:23,319 --> 00:01:25,360
Speaker 1: Things have happened in our marriage that would make a

24
00:01:25,400 --> 00:01:29,360
Speaker 1: normal couple split up, but we're not normal. At our wedding,

25
00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:32,840
Speaker 1: one of his exes showed up and cried loudly while

26
00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:35,960
Speaker 1: we set our vows. She was escorted out, and he

27
00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:39,840
Speaker 1: apologized to me on the altar. It was supposed to

28
00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:43,200
Speaker 1: be the happiest day of my life, but it was ruined.

29
00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:46,919
Speaker 1: That was the first red flag, and over the years

30
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:50,320
Speaker 1: he kept me guessing about her. During our tenth year

31
00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:53,440
Speaker 1: of marriage, I had an accident one night and the

32
00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:57,320
Speaker 1: EMTs called my husband. I was in the car with

33
00:01:57,480 --> 00:02:03,240
Speaker 1: my boyfriend and he was in the car. So that's

34
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:06,080
Speaker 1: the night my husband found out I was having an affair.

35
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,800
Speaker 1: My husband never asked me one question about my affair,

36
00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:12,400
Speaker 1: but he did make a joke about being at the

37
00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:15,600
Speaker 1: wrong place at the wrong time. After my accident, there

38
00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:18,120
Speaker 1: were nights that my husband did not come home and

39
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:21,359
Speaker 1: didn't call me. I felt like I could not say

40
00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:24,079
Speaker 1: a word because because I was full of so much

41
00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:27,480
Speaker 1: guilt for getting caught cheating. We still have sex and

42
00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:30,320
Speaker 1: act like a loving couple and outside of our house

43
00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:34,200
Speaker 1: for the sake of our kids. But he does sleep

44
00:02:34,240 --> 00:02:37,120
Speaker 1: in a separate room and said it's because he snores.

45
00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:39,720
Speaker 1: I will take the snoring and the talking in the

46
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:42,440
Speaker 1: sleep just to feel his body next to mine in

47
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:45,000
Speaker 1: the bed. I have no idea what's going on in

48
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:47,880
Speaker 1: his head. It would have been easier if he had yelled,

49
00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:51,280
Speaker 1: scream or cursed at me four years ago, cursed me

50
00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:53,880
Speaker 1: out four years ago. I wonder if he still loves

51
00:02:53,919 --> 00:02:57,400
Speaker 1: me or not, or if he's got a woman on

52
00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:00,840
Speaker 1: the side. Is he with his ex that ruined our wedding?

53
00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:06,160
Speaker 1: Why does he keep me around? All? Right? This is crazy?

54
00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:10,360
Speaker 1: This is crazy right here. Surely, though, you are not

55
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:14,000
Speaker 1: comparing what your husband's ex did, I mean, coming to

56
00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:18,399
Speaker 1: your wedding and crying during your vows. You're not comparing

57
00:03:18,440 --> 00:03:20,480
Speaker 1: that to your husband finding out you were having an

58
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:23,359
Speaker 1: affair when your lover got pinned in the car after

59
00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:27,520
Speaker 1: that accident. Okay, these are two completely different scenarios here,

60
00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,079
Speaker 1: And I know you know that you were cheating. You

61
00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:34,000
Speaker 1: you were cheating, okay, versus a woman who cried at

62
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:37,200
Speaker 1: your wedding. I mean, it's just not the same. It's

63
00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:40,560
Speaker 1: not the same. Why is he still with you? You asked.

64
00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:43,800
Speaker 1: That's a really good question, because men are definitely more

65
00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:47,480
Speaker 1: likely to leave and not take their wives back after cheating. Okay,

66
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:51,160
Speaker 1: that's a proven fact, while the opposite is true for women.

67
00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:55,480
Speaker 1: Women generally, you know, after some counseling and some beggings,

68
00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:58,040
Speaker 1: some cleaning, a lot of times they'll take their husband

69
00:03:58,040 --> 00:04:02,400
Speaker 1: back after cheating. But like you said, maybe he is

70
00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:05,440
Speaker 1: staying for the kids. Maybe it is because you're comfortable

71
00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:08,680
Speaker 1: and convenient, Maybe you're familiar to him and he just

72
00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:12,000
Speaker 1: doesn't want to leave, or maybe he's having his cake

73
00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:14,040
Speaker 1: and eating it too with you. I mean, he can

74
00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:16,640
Speaker 1: still have sex with you, and he can stay out

75
00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:18,880
Speaker 1: all night and not call you and not come home,

76
00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:21,720
Speaker 1: and he knows you won't say a word because of

77
00:04:21,760 --> 00:04:25,760
Speaker 1: the guilt you feel for cheating on him. So it's

78
00:04:25,839 --> 00:04:28,400
Speaker 1: kind of like he's got you because of this guilt

79
00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:31,640
Speaker 1: situation that you put on yourself because of that, and

80
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,240
Speaker 1: that's why I think he keeps you around. But the

81
00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:37,440
Speaker 1: question is why do you stay? Why do you stay

82
00:04:37,480 --> 00:04:39,760
Speaker 1: and take this? I mean, you guys got to work

83
00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:43,120
Speaker 1: the situation out. If it's to be worked out, Steve,

84
00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:48,039
Speaker 1: why does my husband keep me around after reading is letter?

85
00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:49,800
Speaker 1: I don't really know, but I have a real strong

86
00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:53,960
Speaker 1: opinion about it, and I'll share it with you. Y'all

87
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:57,359
Speaker 1: been married fourteen years and hanging on by a thread.

88
00:04:58,080 --> 00:05:02,160
Speaker 1: It's not even a thread, lady. This letter is just

89
00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:05,800
Speaker 1: two people just in something. It's not being held together

90
00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:09,800
Speaker 1: by anything. We have two children, and sometimes I wonder

91
00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:14,279
Speaker 1: if that's why he stays with me. Well, that's the

92
00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:16,680
Speaker 1: only thing I can come up with. But I have

93
00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:20,320
Speaker 1: an even better reason later on. Though we never talked

94
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:23,200
Speaker 1: about our problem, things happen in our manage that we're

95
00:05:23,200 --> 00:05:27,320
Speaker 1: making a normal couple split up. We're not normal. At

96
00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:30,039
Speaker 1: the wedding, one of his actually showed him cried loud,

97
00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:43,960
Speaker 1: Oh lor j that's why not me. I should have

98
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:47,680
Speaker 1: been me. I didn't have a god got I gotta

99
00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:50,760
Speaker 1: dress you. I could have bought a dress doing the

100
00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:54,920
Speaker 1: most I got. Some friends wouldn't look good. Ay, bros,

101
00:05:55,040 --> 00:06:03,320
Speaker 1: bab I know your best man. Crime ain't even wait

102
00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:05,600
Speaker 1: on the part where the man said, is there anyone

103
00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:16,240
Speaker 1: here who would find na? See? First of all, he

104
00:06:16,279 --> 00:06:19,240
Speaker 1: ain't no real he ain't no real hoo boy, because

105
00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:22,360
Speaker 1: out of hand my boys, oh, lookout for any exit,

106
00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:27,280
Speaker 1: come to the dope. They don't even got me. Oh my,

107
00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:30,440
Speaker 1: one of my homees would have said, hey, donore you

108
00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:35,440
Speaker 1: go out there here, Na, and you would have known

109
00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:40,760
Speaker 1: exactly what they meant. Oh hey, yeah, get out, get out. Yeah. Well,

110
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:44,080
Speaker 1: hang on, Steve, Okay, hang on. We'll get to part

111
00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:46,360
Speaker 1: two of your response. Coming up at twenty three minutes

112
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,520
Speaker 1: after the hour. Today's Strawberry Letters subject why does he

113
00:06:49,640 --> 00:06:52,159
Speaker 1: keep me around? We'll get back into it, try to

114
00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:57,840
Speaker 1: find out why right after this. You're listening show, All right,

115
00:06:57,839 --> 00:07:00,960
Speaker 1: Come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter, the subject

116
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:06,560
Speaker 1: why does he keep me around? Yeah, y'all got problems?

117
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:11,880
Speaker 1: Two kids at you wedding? Oh started he one of

118
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:22,960
Speaker 1: his ex was at crime Holland. Like I said, I

119
00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:29,160
Speaker 1: had I got some cute friends. Would have been brides. Man.

120
00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:34,080
Speaker 1: I know you'll bred man, right, I met your mamma.

121
00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:41,560
Speaker 1: Your mamma back here, you see mess around. Oh yeah,

122
00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:44,840
Speaker 1: she's back to taking her food. She was that scorted out.

123
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:47,160
Speaker 1: He apologized to me at the autars supposed to me

124
00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:48,680
Speaker 1: to happen to day in your life but she roared.

125
00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:50,960
Speaker 1: You say that that should have been the first one

126
00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:54,880
Speaker 1: red flame. But then y'all didn't talk about it, so

127
00:07:55,000 --> 00:08:05,440
Speaker 1: you kept on so over the years, Uh damn it,

128
00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:09,240
Speaker 1: don't just go right there, roll under your desk, right,

129
00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:13,480
Speaker 1: I don't think that's ever happened before on the air, Steve,

130
00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:18,040
Speaker 1: So that was the first red flag. Then over the

131
00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:23,720
Speaker 1: years he kept me guessing about her. I don't well,

132
00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:25,920
Speaker 1: y'all don't talk, so I guess you ain't got nothing

133
00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:27,920
Speaker 1: to do, but cast you didn't bring up no more.

134
00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:32,640
Speaker 1: He just left you guessing. Y'all don't talk. And uh

135
00:08:32,760 --> 00:08:35,240
Speaker 1: but round about the tenth year the marriage, I had

136
00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:38,840
Speaker 1: an accident one night and the e MPs called my husband.

137
00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:41,640
Speaker 1: I was in the car with my boyfriend and he

138
00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:44,200
Speaker 1: was peeling in the car. You wrote that census like

139
00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:47,440
Speaker 1: it belonged. Now, yeah, you just put that in the

140
00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:50,199
Speaker 1: letder like what nothing doing out tienth year. I was

141
00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:52,439
Speaker 1: in the cars and then with my boyfriend and they're

142
00:08:52,480 --> 00:08:57,319
Speaker 1: gonna call my husband because he was peeling. Then, well

143
00:08:58,040 --> 00:09:05,080
Speaker 1: I don't know how so so SO called my husband

144
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:10,000
Speaker 1: for what you should have walked off. Yeah, I can't

145
00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:12,600
Speaker 1: be in that car. You wasn't pinned in. He was

146
00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:16,800
Speaker 1: pinning then you couldn't get him out walk off. You

147
00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:19,120
Speaker 1: crossed the street at the corner, stole looking at the

148
00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:25,000
Speaker 1: whole thing. Well, how would she explain that to her man? What?

149
00:09:25,160 --> 00:09:30,240
Speaker 1: It's her car? Right? No, it wasn't her car. I

150
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:33,280
Speaker 1: think it was her car. Wasn't and he was That's

151
00:09:33,320 --> 00:09:36,440
Speaker 1: why they called him. Yeah, she just said, penned in

152
00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:38,720
Speaker 1: the car. Yeah, oh, what I have just said? My

153
00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:43,400
Speaker 1: car was stolen. I walked off. Somebody stole the car.

154
00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:45,520
Speaker 1: I don't know how he got in the passenger seat,

155
00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:47,760
Speaker 1: but he got pinned in. That's probably how the car

156
00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:51,160
Speaker 1: flot though, and that's why they called her husband. Yeah, okay,

157
00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:54,080
Speaker 1: so that's the night my husband found out I was

158
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:57,319
Speaker 1: having an affair. That's not true. My husband never asked

159
00:09:57,320 --> 00:10:00,240
Speaker 1: me one question about my family, because that's nothing. Night

160
00:10:00,280 --> 00:10:04,560
Speaker 1: he found out. He already knew. That's why he ain't

161
00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:07,760
Speaker 1: say nothing. But then he asked him. But he was

162
00:10:07,840 --> 00:10:09,880
Speaker 1: joking about being me being in the wrong place of

163
00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:12,199
Speaker 1: the wrong time after my accident. That was night that

164
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:15,520
Speaker 1: my husband didn't come home and didn't call me. He

165
00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:18,959
Speaker 1: got a free pass. You know what your husband saying? Oh,

166
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:25,520
Speaker 1: this is what we're doing. Cool. Oh cool. I ain't

167
00:10:25,559 --> 00:10:29,520
Speaker 1: got to play this off no more. I felt like

168
00:10:29,559 --> 00:10:31,600
Speaker 1: I couldn't say a word because I was fuelling so

169
00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:35,640
Speaker 1: much guilt for being caught cheat. Yeah. Now we still

170
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,880
Speaker 1: have sex and act like a loving couple inn and

171
00:10:37,920 --> 00:10:40,120
Speaker 1: outside of our house for the sake of the kid.

172
00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:42,080
Speaker 1: But he does sleep in a separate room. And he

173
00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:47,920
Speaker 1: said because he's snowed, and he tied, it ain't choe knight.

174
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:55,240
Speaker 1: It ain't Choe Knight. I got the rest. I would

175
00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:57,480
Speaker 1: take the snowing and talking in his sleep just to

176
00:10:57,559 --> 00:11:01,959
Speaker 1: feel his body next to mine in the bed. You

177
00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:05,679
Speaker 1: just won't slump. I have no idea what's going on

178
00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:07,720
Speaker 1: in his head. Oh I can tell you exactly what's

179
00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:09,640
Speaker 1: going on in his head. It would have been easy

180
00:11:09,679 --> 00:11:11,719
Speaker 1: if he had just yelled, scream and customed me out

181
00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:14,640
Speaker 1: four years ago. I wonder if he still loves me

182
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:18,280
Speaker 1: or not. He ain't in love with you. You're sleeping

183
00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:22,000
Speaker 1: with another dude. He ain't in love with you. You

184
00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:27,640
Speaker 1: ain't saying you stopped having another fan. You didn't say that. No,

185
00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:31,840
Speaker 1: he don't love you, Or if he's got a woman

186
00:11:31,920 --> 00:11:35,679
Speaker 1: on the side, Yes, yeah, he don't come over, he

187
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:41,360
Speaker 1: don't call you. He ain't playing cards. Yes, he got

188
00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:44,440
Speaker 1: another woman on the side. Is he with this extra ruled? Now?

189
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:47,320
Speaker 1: Why is that a question? Why is that even important?

190
00:11:47,520 --> 00:11:50,160
Speaker 1: What difference you would make? Who he with? He would

191
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:52,319
Speaker 1: more than one person. I tell you that right now.

192
00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:57,560
Speaker 1: He lived his best life. Why does he keep me around?

193
00:11:58,080 --> 00:12:02,800
Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? Why would he leave? Why not? Yeah,

194
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:05,600
Speaker 1: here's a man that's getting all the sex he won't.

195
00:12:06,679 --> 00:12:10,360
Speaker 1: You still have sex with him, and he can come

196
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:13,360
Speaker 1: in when he wants to stay out when he wants

197
00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:16,640
Speaker 1: to have sex with somebody else. You don't say nothing

198
00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:19,520
Speaker 1: about that, and you don't say nothing when y'all have sex.

199
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:28,400
Speaker 1: What it's perfect scenario? Oh my god, Oh my god.

200
00:12:28,679 --> 00:12:35,800
Speaker 1: If it isn't a little miss hattatude, come on, that's

201
00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:39,360
Speaker 1: my favorite thing. I saw TikTok. I don't know who

202
00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:41,160
Speaker 1: the dude voice is, but they put it on a

203
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:44,640
Speaker 1: little cute girls, little babies when they Oh my god,

204
00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:50,480
Speaker 1: if it isn't miss little missisaitude. That name Martin Laurence.

205
00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:53,920
Speaker 1: I didn't know where they got that from, really, but

206
00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:58,679
Speaker 1: I didn't know what it was. Anyway, lady, you're not

207
00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:02,120
Speaker 1: looking for answer to get out. So whatever, whatever, both

208
00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:05,160
Speaker 1: y'all in in trouble, y'all ain't got no marri Yeah,

209
00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:07,839
Speaker 1: the marriage is doomed. You're right. Poster your comments on

210
00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:11,440
Speaker 1: Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook,

211
00:13:11,440 --> 00:13:14,520
Speaker 1: and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand now

212
00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:16,800
Speaker 1: coming up at forty six minutes after the hour, you

213
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:19,920
Speaker 1: know what time it is, time for junior and sports talk.

214
00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:23,839
Speaker 1: Right after this, you're listening to this Dave Harvey Morning

215
00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:24,120
Speaker 1: Show