Speaker 1: So there's an article on Shanna Moakler and Travis Barker
Speaker 1: and Courtney Kardashian and a term called parental alien nation,
Speaker 1: where Shanna Moakler is effectively saying that she can't compete
Speaker 1: with Travis and Courtney and that she's implying that the
Speaker 1: extravagance and their fame and I guess the ga wagons
Speaker 1: and the Prada is creating parental alien nation and that
Speaker 1: Travis really set out to be the favorite parent and
Speaker 1: the star dad, and that it's alienating her and that
Speaker 1: she's just going to be there waiting being a good
Speaker 1: mother and that the kids are her priority, and that
Speaker 1: she can't compete. This is a very common aspect. First
Speaker 1: of all, what happens is is it happens more with men,
Speaker 1: where men who seem like they're letting the woman be
Speaker 1: in the driver's seat with the parenting and the activities
Speaker 1: and the kids and the doctors and all those things.
Speaker 1: All of a sudden a divorce starts to happen and
Speaker 1: the father becomes what they call superdad. The father is
Speaker 1: super involved and now he wants to do everything with
Speaker 1: the kids and often with the next spouse or girlfriend.
Speaker 1: They're even more involved, and the previous spouse is sitting
Speaker 1: here saying, what the hell this is like a sham, Like,
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, now he's superdad.
Speaker 2: It could be for many reasons. It could be the
Speaker 2: kids are older.
Speaker 1: And the man is identifying and connecting to them more.
Speaker 1: It could be that the man was suffocating in their
Speaker 1: own marriage, staying away from it because they weren't happy.
Speaker 1: It could be that it's competitive now and it's a battle,
Speaker 1: so it's a divorce battle, and they just sort of like,
Speaker 1: you know, you hate the other parent more than you
Speaker 1: love your kid, and it's a competition. It could be
Speaker 1: a million things. It's just it could be in security.
Speaker 1: All of a sudden, your word, your kids are gonna
Speaker 1: hate you. When you had the secure of the one house,
Speaker 1: everything was sort of, you know, solid and secure and peaceful,
Speaker 1: and now all of a sudden, you're the pariah and
Speaker 1: you're in another house. So you need to throw money
Speaker 1: at the problem, buy your kid's presence, spoil them, no rules,
Speaker 1: et cetera. So a couple of things. Number one, those
Speaker 1: things don't really work. Kids really overall can't be bought.
Speaker 1: If they can be bought, they'll take the trappings. Of
Speaker 1: course they're not stupid, but they'll ultimately know what it means.
Speaker 1: So kids really do realize it starts to happen around
Speaker 1: like eleven and twelve, when they become their own people
Speaker 1: that have their own voices and opinions, that they start
Speaker 1: to really realize what's going on between parents, and any
Speaker 1: mud slinging from one parent to the other ends up
Speaker 1: really coming back on the one slinging the mud. And
Speaker 1: you know, kids can't articulate that, they don't even realize it.
Speaker 1: But you know, it can be subtleties like one parents
Speaker 1: saying to the kid, I know you don't want to
Speaker 1: go to your mommy, or I know you don't want
Speaker 1: to go to your daddy, but you'll be back with
Speaker 1: me soon and I love you so much, and we
Speaker 1: do things differently here. And it can be passive aggressive,
Speaker 1: It can be aggressive. It could be talking totally negatively
Speaker 1: about the other parent. All of it doesn't work. Kids
Speaker 1: are very intuitive, Kids are very smart. Kids totally get it.
Speaker 1: And what happens is once their brains, their emotions, their minds,
Speaker 1: their emotional intelligence start to form, they then later put
Speaker 1: the puzzle pieces of what's happened for years before. So
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, everything starts to shuffle into place
Speaker 1: and they start to realize things that they kind of
Speaker 1: saw or experienced as a young child but couldn't process.
Speaker 1: And then they start to really realize which parent is
Speaker 1: trying to, you know, pit the kid against the other
Speaker 1: parent or put the kid in the middle.
Speaker 2: It's just a bad, dangerous game. So the parental alienation
Speaker 2: thing is a serious thing, and.
Speaker 1: It's overused as a term because judges will actually file
Speaker 1: and say that will rule in favor of it. But
Speaker 1: it's not that common, like parents use terms like that
Speaker 1: all the time, basically meaning like, oh, my ex is
Speaker 1: kind of trying to pin my kids against me. But
Speaker 1: parental alienation is a real thing, and it's a systematic thing,
Speaker 1: and it's a consistent thing, and it's something that means
Speaker 1: that the one parent is really doing a number and
Speaker 1: a job on getting the kids to really have no
Speaker 1: relationship with the other parent.
Speaker 2: It's only bad for the kids.
Speaker 1: You want to set up positive relationships with both sexes
Speaker 1: for your kids so they don't model their life and
Speaker 1: their choices based on negativity and the home. So it's
Speaker 1: just a terrible idea. It's a boomerang. I'm not saying
Speaker 1: any of this is actually happening. I definitely have an
Speaker 1: opinion on kids getting g wagons for Christmas and you know,
Speaker 1: things like that. I just don't believe in spoiling kids.
Speaker 1: It's very hard. It's hard for anyone. It's it's I
Speaker 1: guess hard for me. Although I crack the whip and
Speaker 1: I'm on it, I can't imagine it's got to be
Speaker 1: a million, a billion times harder for Kardashians who just
Speaker 1: get everything handed to them. But there's a discipline, and
Speaker 1: just because you're a billionaire doesn't mean your kids need
Speaker 1: to be draped in arimez and diamonds.
Speaker 2: I don't believe in that.
Speaker 1: So possibly the trappings and also living in LA and
Speaker 1: Beverly Hills and entertainment and fame and celebrity. So I'm
Speaker 1: definitely not saying that parental alienation was happening. I'm just
Speaker 1: talking about it as a concept, and it is relatable
Speaker 1: for Shanna to feel like she can't win, she can't compete,
Speaker 1: she can't afford.
Speaker 2: But love is what kids want.
Speaker 1: Discipline, structure, They want to know where they should be.
Speaker 2: Coming and going.
Speaker 1: They want rules, they want unconditional love. They want tough love.
Speaker 1: They don't need your parent to be your best friend.
Speaker 1: They don't need your parents to be your sugar daddy.
Speaker 1: They want traditional parenting, and that's a mistake the parents
Speaker 1: make in life and in divorce. There's no denying that
Speaker 1: the Kardashians are a force to be competing with. Kanye
Speaker 1: struggled with when was he going to see his kids?
Speaker 1: How could he get to be a part of what
Speaker 1: school they'd go to or what church they'd go to.
Speaker 1: Whether you like Kanye agree with him or not, it's
Speaker 1: definitely the Kardashians have an infrastructure.
Speaker 2: They have a dynasty.
Speaker 1: A power house structure, a layered structure of just so
Speaker 1: many people and so much money and so much fame
Speaker 1: and so much power and so much influence and the shows, etc.
Speaker 2: That it's hard to compete with that.
Speaker 1: So, you know, if you're the ex wife of someone
Speaker 1: and your kids are now being raised by Kardashians, how
Speaker 1: can you possibly compete with that? That's like competing with
Speaker 1: the royal family, you know. But as parents, it's important
Speaker 1: that you want the best for your kids. For me,
Speaker 1: I want my child to have meaningful time with me
Speaker 1: and with her father. I want her to be around
Speaker 1: people that treat her well. I want her to be
Speaker 1: around yes, experiences that yes, we do have privilege and
Speaker 1: she does get to do amazing, interesting things, but I
Speaker 1: also want her to see what it's like for people
Speaker 1: who can't afford to do lavish things. I want her
Speaker 1: to have a well rounded, reasonable life to say her
Speaker 1: up for success. I don't want to wrap her in
Speaker 1: Airmez bubble wrap and have her think that life is
Speaker 1: just going to be so perfect and easy because it's
Speaker 1: not textured, and you end up getting depressed and you
Speaker 1: end up being in some sort of void in some
Speaker 1: hole because you didn't do anything for yourself. There's something
Speaker 1: very strong to be said for building something on your own,
Speaker 1: making money on your own, doing it yourself, having passion
Speaker 1: accomplishing something.
Speaker 2: And I think that parental alienation.
Speaker 1: Is a term that is very serious but can also
Speaker 1: be overused because it's a very very serious term that
Speaker 1: judges take very seriously, and they don't rule in favor
Speaker 1: of it very often. It would have to be very
Speaker 1: hard to prove that one parent was systematically trying to
Speaker 1: alienate
Speaker 2: The child from the other