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Speaker 1: Time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if you need

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Speaker 1: advice on relationships, on dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry LETTA. We could be reading your

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Speaker 1: letter live. It's just like we're gonna read this one

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Speaker 1: right here. Who knows it could be your letter? You

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Speaker 1: just never know. All right, ladies and gentlemen, Just time

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Speaker 1: for the Strawberry Letter with my good friends. Shirley straw Berry.

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Speaker 1: Thank you my good friend Junior. Subject three years later

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Speaker 1: and we're only friends. Dear Stephen, Shirley, I'm thirty four

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Speaker 1: years old and my significant other is thirty nine and

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Speaker 1: we've been together for three years. I call him my

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Speaker 1: significant other because he is yet to define our relationship.

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Speaker 1: We started as friends, just like most couples do, and

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Speaker 1: we got closer. He told me that he didn't want

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Speaker 1: anything serious, but he enjoyed spending time with me. We

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Speaker 1: started having sex a month after we met, and at

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Speaker 1: that time I was very busy at work and helping

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Speaker 1: my sister with her new baby, so I was not

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Speaker 1: ready for anything serious either. Then my guy tore his

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Speaker 1: acl and he needed something someone to help him out,

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Speaker 1: so he came to stay with me for a week.

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Speaker 1: I was crazy about him, so taking care of him

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Speaker 1: came naturally. Whenever we were together and his phone rang,

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Speaker 1: he'd tell the caller he was with me, and he'd

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Speaker 1: call them back. This made me confident about the direction

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Speaker 1: our relationship was going in, so I never asked him

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Speaker 1: if we were boyfriend slash girlfriend. After two years, we

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Speaker 1: were stuck together like glue. If you saw him, you

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Speaker 1: saw me. That all changed last week when we double

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Speaker 1: dated with one of my girlfriends and her fiance. They

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Speaker 1: got engaged recently and they are so in love you

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Speaker 1: can feel it. My friend asked my guy if he'd

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Speaker 1: been thinking about marriage, and my guy spoke up and

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Speaker 1: embarrassed me so bad. He said, we're not that serious yet.

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Speaker 1: We're best friends and we love each other, but we

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Speaker 1: are not exclusive. He told my friend that I'm aware

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Speaker 1: of our status and I'm not pressuring him for a title.

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Speaker 1: I sat there, looking stupid and holding back tears. He

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Speaker 1: said he does plan to get married one day, when

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Speaker 1: the time is right. What I heard is that I'm

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Speaker 1: not the one. Is he wasting my time or is

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Speaker 1: he dating others to get it out of his system

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Speaker 1: before he proposes. I'm so confused. Okay, come on now,

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Speaker 1: I really do not want you to be confused right now.

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Speaker 1: I don't want that. I need you to be good

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Speaker 1: and woke. Okay, because this man just told your good

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Speaker 1: friends and you what he really thinks of you in

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Speaker 1: no uncertain terms, and you heard him tell them, so

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Speaker 1: please be clear. He said you're not exclusion sith, you

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Speaker 1: are not exclusive, which means yes, he's seeing other people, okay,

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Speaker 1: and that marriage will happen one day when the time

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Speaker 1: is right. Well, if it's marriage you want with him,

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Speaker 1: you can no longer sit back and allow him and

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Speaker 1: him only to define this relationship. You have a say

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Speaker 1: in this too. You're in it. Your feelings matter, and

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Speaker 1: if you've changed and you want more, you have to

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Speaker 1: let him know. It's been three years, and after three

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Speaker 1: years you should feel extremely comfortable in expressing yourself to him,

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Speaker 1: and with a lot of confidence. I might add, remember

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Speaker 1: he had no shame, no trepidation when he spoke his

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Speaker 1: mind to your friends, and you should do the same.

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Speaker 1: You should do the same, otherwise you could be spending

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Speaker 1: another three years in this holding pattern of a relationship.

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Speaker 1: Not nowhere it's going, and I know you don't want that. Steve,

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Speaker 1: Speak up, girl, Steve, Well, this letter, you've explained your

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Speaker 1: situation thoroughly. So what you want our advice for? I

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Speaker 1: don't understand. You're thirty four, he's thirty nine. I call

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Speaker 1: him my significant other. He don't call you nothing. I

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Speaker 1: called him my significant other. And then you justify by

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Speaker 1: saying because he has yet to define our relationship. Oh no,

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Speaker 1: that's because you ain't defined it. You just you just

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Speaker 1: what what you ain't on him do, because all throughout

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Speaker 1: the letter, he showed you what he gonna do, which

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Speaker 1: ain't pretty much. Ain't about nothing. Well, you say we

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Speaker 1: started as friends just like most couples. That's not how

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Speaker 1: unusually works. But okay, as we got closer, he told

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Speaker 1: me he didn't want anything serious. Dude, Okay, you typed this,

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Speaker 1: so obviously you heard it. He told you he didn't

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Speaker 1: want nothing serious, but he enjoyed spending time with me.

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Speaker 1: We started having sex a month after we met. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's when he really enjoyed it, spending time with you,

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Speaker 1: because y'all was having sex and I was very busy

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Speaker 1: at work helping my sister with her new baby, So

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Speaker 1: I wasn't really ready for anything serious either. Well, see

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Speaker 1: you got into the relationship like a lot of people do,

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Speaker 1: ye and you you was wanting something. But you're talking

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Speaker 1: about you ain't want nothing either. Well it don't sound

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Speaker 1: like that in the letter, because all through what you

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Speaker 1: had the table crying for later on if you ain't

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Speaker 1: want nothing. See, then my guy tore his a yell

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Speaker 1: and he needed someone to help him out, so he

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Speaker 1: came to stay with me for a week. I was

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Speaker 1: crazy about taking care of him naturally. So now when

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Speaker 1: he needs you, fuck convenience, here he comes. Now he

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Speaker 1: need a woman. Now, see he need nothing sious, but

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Speaker 1: that see that torn acl that's a serious injury. So

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Speaker 1: now let me cozy on up to this girl that

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Speaker 1: I'm using, and I'm gonna stay at her house for

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Speaker 1: a week. Called this serious now, But a minute ago

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Speaker 1: he told you don't want nothing seious. But that injury

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Speaker 1: didn't tied him up. So now he ain't come. All right,

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you the ust every when we come back.

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Speaker 1: All right, you heard him. We'll have part two of

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Speaker 1: Steve's response coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour.

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Speaker 1: Today's subject three years later, we're still friends. Will get

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Speaker 1: back into it right after this. You're listening to show,

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Speaker 1: all right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's strawberry letter,

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Speaker 1: the subject three years later, we're still friends? Well, lady,

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Speaker 1: you're dating the man. You were just friends, you say,

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Speaker 1: like most couples. Then y'all got closer, and he told

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Speaker 1: you I don't want nothing serious. He told you that

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Speaker 1: top of the letter. But he said he enjoyed spending

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Speaker 1: time with me. Well you know why because right after that,

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Speaker 1: y'all said, y'all started having the sex a month after

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Speaker 1: we met. Well, I know it was gonna hear will

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Speaker 1: he enjoying this time? But you now now you was

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Speaker 1: okay with that, you say, because you was busy at working.

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Speaker 1: You was helping your sister with a new baby. So

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Speaker 1: I was not ready for anything serious either. Ah, well

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Speaker 1: that ain't what this letter say, because you wrote the

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Speaker 1: whole time in the letter you sound like you was

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Speaker 1: thinking someone's gonna get serious. Right. Well, then you got

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Speaker 1: towards acl. He needed somebody to help him out, so

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Speaker 1: he came to stay with me for a week. Because

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Speaker 1: you know why it calls at L is a serious injury.

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Speaker 1: So now he over your house for a week. You

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Speaker 1: loved it because you're crazy about him. Thank of him

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Speaker 1: just came naturally, as it does with a lot of women,

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Speaker 1: because a lot of women are very nurturing by nature.

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Speaker 1: Women are the best nurturers in the world. So you

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Speaker 1: had a chance to take care of somebody, to show

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Speaker 1: him how much you love him and how serious you are.

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Speaker 1: Why he had that serious injury. Girl, you're making it

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Speaker 1: happen and now here going to part that I really

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Speaker 1: want you to talk about. So taking care of him

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Speaker 1: came naturally. Whenever we were together and his phone rang,

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Speaker 1: he'd tell the caller he was with me, and he

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Speaker 1: called them back. This made me confident about the direction

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Speaker 1: of our relationship was going on. WHOA, So you're ignoring

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Speaker 1: the fact that the phone ringing, You just go damn

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Speaker 1: that you your takeaway? What that was? He tell everybody,

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm with huh, I'll call you back. That gave

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Speaker 1: you confidence. Girl, You forgot he told you this wasn't

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Speaker 1: nothing serious, and based on the conversation, he tell that

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Speaker 1: to everybody. So now when the girls do call him

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Speaker 1: on the phone, he hadn't already told him they got

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Speaker 1: a torn a sail and he staying with his friend.

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Speaker 1: I'm with her right now. I'll call you back. And

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Speaker 1: they're cool with that because he hadn't told them they

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Speaker 1: ain't got nothing serious. But mostly he hadn't told them

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Speaker 1: you ain't serious. And if you don't think he told

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Speaker 1: him that, that's why he's so coolly answering this phone,

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Speaker 1: because why you gotta he put his phone on vibrated

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Speaker 1: if he was trying to hidele he ain't got to, though,

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Speaker 1: he can leave it open because you ain't serious. He

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Speaker 1: told you that, but he told everybody else that. So

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Speaker 1: now that made you confident about the direction your relationship

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Speaker 1: with going in. So I never asked him if we

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Speaker 1: were born for any girlfriend mistake. After two years, were

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Speaker 1: stuck together like glue. Okay, if you saw him, you

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Speaker 1: saw me. That all changed last week when we double

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Speaker 1: dated with one of my girlfriends and her fiance. They

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Speaker 1: got engaged recently and they are so in love and

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Speaker 1: you can feel it. My friend asked my guy if

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Speaker 1: he'd been thinking about marriage, and my guy spoke up

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Speaker 1: and embarrassed me so bad. He said, he's not that

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Speaker 1: we're not that serious yet. See, because his acl fixed

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Speaker 1: and he told you two years ago he wasn't looking

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Speaker 1: for nothing serious. Sure, he said, we're best friends and

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Speaker 1: we love each other, but we're not exclusive out now.

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Speaker 1: I don't know why that affected you, because he'd been

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Speaker 1: asking the phone the whole time. Why he told my

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Speaker 1: friend that I'm aware of our status and I'm not

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Speaker 1: pressing him for a title. He told the truth. He

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Speaker 1: told you he didn't want nothing serious. He ain't never

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Speaker 1: gave you a title, and you know you're aware of

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Speaker 1: it because he told you that, And you ain't pressing

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Speaker 1: him for a title, because you said back in the

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Speaker 1: letter you ain't never asked him if you was boyfriend

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Speaker 1: and girlfriend. You said that, so you can't get mad

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Speaker 1: at this guy in this letter at all. I sat

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Speaker 1: there looking stupid and holding back tears. He said he

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Speaker 1: does playing to get married one day, when the time

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Speaker 1: is right. What I heard is I'm not the one.

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Speaker 1: Is he wasting my time? Or is he dating others

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Speaker 1: to get out of his system before he promoted? Wait

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Speaker 1: a minute, what where do you get this stuff from

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Speaker 1: that you keep reading into this said? Is he dating

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Speaker 1: others to get it out of his system before he proposes?

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Speaker 1: He thirty nine? Right? But what he's thirty nine, lady,

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Speaker 1: what do you mean he trying to get this out

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Speaker 1: of his system before he proposes. He never told you

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Speaker 1: he wanted to marry you. He's never mentioned marriage to you.

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Speaker 1: You ain't even his girlfriend, and he told it to

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Speaker 1: you in front of your friends. Why you're still there

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Speaker 1: hoping and waiting is beyond me. What are you waiting for? Lady?

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Speaker 1: You know the answer to all of this. Stop reading

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Speaker 1: more into something that ain't there. All you need to

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Speaker 1: do is go in and say, look, I want a title,

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Speaker 1: I want to know what his relationship is, or we're

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Speaker 1: gonna have to end it bye, and he's gonna just

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Speaker 1: going over therefter mother girls, It's called thank you. Steve

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Speaker 1: Poster comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM

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Speaker 1: and Instagram and Facebook. Check out the Strawberry Podcast on

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Speaker 1: demand coming up at forty six minutes after the hour.

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Speaker 1: What Junior has a new poem for us? Right after this, Yes,

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Speaker 1: Father's Day, you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show