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Speaker 1: This is the Benn and Ashley I almost Famous podcast

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Speaker 1: with her radio. Hey guys, welcome to a girl's only

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Speaker 1: almost same as podcast. In celebration of Mother's Day, We've

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Speaker 1: got a whole bunch of bachelor moms and well bachelor

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Speaker 1: not moms too, hanging out together in l a Um.

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Speaker 1: They're going to get their nails done, their makeup done,

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Speaker 1: They're gonna go for a shopping spree at Macy's. This

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Speaker 1: podcast is brought to you because of Mazie's, which is

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Speaker 1: a great place to get your Mother's Day gift. I

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Speaker 1: mean they have everything, as you know, clothes, makeup, jewelry, perfume.

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Speaker 1: I can't think of anything that a mom would want

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Speaker 1: that you really couldn't find at Macy's. So um, I'm

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Speaker 1: unfortunately not able to join them because Jared had COVID

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Speaker 1: this week and I was exposed and all right, I'm

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Speaker 1: so I'm having foamo over here. But a lot of

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Speaker 1: my fellow bachelor moms are having a day of pampering

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Speaker 1: and just girl time over there, and I'm excited to

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Speaker 1: catch up with them via zoom. So our first guest

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Speaker 1: is going to be one of the most notorious bachelor moms.

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Speaker 1: I guess notorious may not be. Maybe it's not the

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Speaker 1: most appropriate word, but she's When you think of bachelor moms,

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Speaker 1: you definitely think of Amanda standing because she so publicly

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Speaker 1: dated Ben Higgins and others on Paradise Um with having

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Speaker 1: two girls, and she introduced the girls too Ben on

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Speaker 1: the show. So let's get Amanda on to talk about motherhood. Alright, guys,

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Speaker 1: a man is standing sitting here looking cute as ever

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Speaker 1: with your brunette hair. How do you feel bring a

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Speaker 1: brunette now? I feel good? I love it. Actually, are

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Speaker 1: you ever going to go back to blonde for the wedding? Maybe?

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Speaker 1: I think just for the wedding. If it weren't for

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Speaker 1: the wedding, I think I would keep it for a

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Speaker 1: long time. But I feel like I need to look

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Speaker 1: like myself at the wedding, and I just feel like

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Speaker 1: I'm a blonde. So I feel like you're a blonde

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Speaker 1: to you look beautiful both ways. But I think it

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Speaker 1: would be crazy if for your wedding day you were

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Speaker 1: your classic you know, um, your signature blonde. Yes, I've

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Speaker 1: been blonde for thirty two years, so I got to

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Speaker 1: do it for the wedding. Thirty two years. You've been

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Speaker 1: blonde since birth? Your natural blonde? Okay, so I am.

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Speaker 1: I was born blonde. I had blonde hair in my

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Speaker 1: whole life, so probably, I mean, I think now if

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Speaker 1: my roots growing brown, But I started dyeing my hair

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Speaker 1: before that happened, so I've always been gotcha, got you? Yeah? Okay?

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Speaker 1: So what role are your girls going to play in

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Speaker 1: the wedding and how active are they in wedding planning?

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Speaker 1: I feel like both of them are probably super into

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Speaker 1: dress shopping and decor with you. It's so funny because

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Speaker 1: Kins is so excited, she's so into it. So I

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Speaker 1: decided to make her like my maid of honor because

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Speaker 1: we're not having bridal parties, and then Charlie is going

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Speaker 1: to be a flower girl. I fee like Charlie, She's

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Speaker 1: she's very like distracted, she's not as into it. I

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Speaker 1: feel like she doesn't really know like what's going on.

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Speaker 1: So um Kins will be the maid of honor. Oh

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Speaker 1: my god, that is so adorable, so cute. How is

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Speaker 1: the wedding dress shopping going and are they going to

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Speaker 1: be part of that? Yeah? So we've went We've went

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Speaker 1: to a couple of places, actually, It's so funny because

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Speaker 1: I was more into them trying on dresses than I was, Like,

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Speaker 1: I care more about their looks than I do for mine.

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Speaker 1: It's actually scaring me how much I am relaxed about

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Speaker 1: the wedding planning. I feel like at the last minute,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to be a brad zilla because I've been

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Speaker 1: very relaxed about it all since my Amanda's been on

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Speaker 1: the show. She got engaged to her fiance Michael. He

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Speaker 1: has a great presence on her social media. So if

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Speaker 1: you don't know Michael, now go follow her and get

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Speaker 1: to know Michael. Um, do you think that your chiller

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Speaker 1: about this wedding plan because you've already been married before?

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Speaker 1: I don't think so, because in my mind, I haven't

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Speaker 1: been if if that makes sense, Like I don't count

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Speaker 1: my first wedding, Like it's weird for me to even

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Speaker 1: talk about. So do you not count your person wedding

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Speaker 1: or your first marriage but the whole thing, it just

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Speaker 1: doesn't Yeah, Well, I had kids first, so I was

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Speaker 1: so young, and I just feel like everyone everyone gets

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Speaker 1: like one one practice round that doesn't count. So I

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Speaker 1: don't think that's why. I think it's just hard when

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Speaker 1: you have kids, and we're both so busy, and then

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Speaker 1: adding wedding planning on top of it, like we're both

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Speaker 1: so excited to get married, but we're both like super

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Speaker 1: chill about the actual wedding. Amanda, how in the world, like,

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Speaker 1: do you parents to kids have a job even though

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Speaker 1: you know your job is like you know you do

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Speaker 1: it at home. Still, let's take away from any of

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Speaker 1: the difficulty, because what I found is like staying home,

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Speaker 1: like being a stay at home being a stay at

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Speaker 1: home mom who also does her work from home. It's

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Speaker 1: really challenging because you have to like parents and work

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Speaker 1: at the same time. And I know people will be

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Speaker 1: little influencer working, but it's a real job. So please

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Speaker 1: give me pointers on how you do this, especially a

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Speaker 1: couple of years ago when the kids were younger, because

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Speaker 1: now I feel like your your girls are pretty self sufficient.

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Speaker 1: They are pretty self sufficient now. But it's crazy because

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Speaker 1: even still, like during COVID, they were home and they

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Speaker 1: were doing online school and I couldn't get anything done,

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Speaker 1: Like it is impossible for me to get stuff done

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Speaker 1: when the kids are home. Even now they're in school.

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Speaker 1: They're back in school now, so it's so much easier

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Speaker 1: I feel like I get everything done while they're at school.

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Speaker 1: Once they get home, it's just it's really hard. Everything

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Speaker 1: slows down. Everything. Yeah, I'm able to do everything tech

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Speaker 1: Nickeli still, but it'll take me three to four times longer. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you can get like, if you have a list of

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Speaker 1: like ten things, you can maybe get two of them done. Yes,

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Speaker 1: I'm like okay. It's like Jared will be like, so

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Speaker 1: would you do today, And I'm like, well, I swear

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Speaker 1: to you. I didn't sit on the couch for more

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Speaker 1: than an hour, and that was just when I was

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Speaker 1: feeding him. But when I think about the things that

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Speaker 1: I accomplished, all I can think about is that and

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Speaker 1: that and both of them. Pre baby would have probably

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Speaker 1: taken me a total of like an hour and a half.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it definitely gets easier, but it is still

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Speaker 1: impossible for me to like work from home when the

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Speaker 1: kids are home. It's it's hard. Okay, Well, I'm glad

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Speaker 1: to know that I'm not alone. You're not. They start school, Oh,

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Speaker 1: thank you, and probably when they start talking maybe no, yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: and then they're just probably demanding yeah. Uh, let's talk

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Speaker 1: about you having kids in the future. With Michael, I

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Speaker 1: feel like, I know that you want more kids, um,

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Speaker 1: and I know that you want a boy. So what's

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Speaker 1: the timeline on this? And I know that you can't

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Speaker 1: promise yourself you're gonna get a boy, but why do

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Speaker 1: you want a boy? And was the timeline? Okay? So

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Speaker 1: I want to boy just because I already have two

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Speaker 1: girls and I think it'd be fun to have one

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Speaker 1: of each. But Michael and I swear we're going to

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Speaker 1: just have another girl, like we think that we're just

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Speaker 1: gonna have all girls. Um, So we want to be

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Speaker 1: married for a year and just kind of enjoy married

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Speaker 1: life before we start trying. Um. So i'd say like

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Speaker 1: in the next two years, I hope. Okay, yeah, sounds good.

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Speaker 1: He will be adorable and then he'll have snuggle time

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Speaker 1: with George, the most amazing Golden Retriever ever. Yes, he's

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Speaker 1: so cute. He's so cute. I love talk about sleepovers

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Speaker 1: because you have talked about sleepovers on your insest story

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Speaker 1: so many times. And I'm sure you're probably annoyed that

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Speaker 1: I'm even bringing this up, but people seem so curious

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Speaker 1: about it that I just want to talk about it,

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Speaker 1: especially since I feel very similar to you. You don't

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Speaker 1: let your girls have sleepovers and they're still young. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so what it's kids? Like nine? Kids is actually turning

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Speaker 1: ten this weekend. Okay, so it's just during ten this weekend? Okay,

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Speaker 1: eight and nine? I mean, so yeah, I think that's

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Speaker 1: totally legit that you don't want them having sleepovers right now.

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Speaker 1: Do you think that's going to change? And what's your

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Speaker 1: reasoning behind it? To be honest, I was shocked by

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Speaker 1: how many people were questioning it because I feel like

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Speaker 1: it's kind of a no brainer, Not that I'm judging

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Speaker 1: anyone who does let their kids have sleepovers, but I

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Speaker 1: think it's pretty obvious why some people wouldn't. Um. I

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Speaker 1: definitely don't see myself along allowing them to have sleepovers

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Speaker 1: anytime soon. Kiins, I fully trust kids is more response

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Speaker 1: able than I am. Charlie, she's never having a sleepover. Ever.

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Speaker 1: I don't think, what do you think they're going to

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Speaker 1: get into at this age? I'm not so worried. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I just I worry about everything. It's actually something I'm

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Speaker 1: working on because even the thought of my kids like

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Speaker 1: becoming teenagers and just walking to the park with their

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Speaker 1: friends without me watching terrifies me. Yeah, I can no, No,

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Speaker 1: I think that we should put chips in our kids.

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Speaker 1: I'm not even kidding you. I know that sounds insane

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Speaker 1: and like we have trackers on the phones and all that,

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Speaker 1: but like they can easily drop their phone, or whoever's

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Speaker 1: kidnapping them can also take their phone and turn it off.

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Speaker 1: So my thought is that I would love to put

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Speaker 1: a chip in Dawson until he is eighteen, and then

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Speaker 1: he could take it out. It would be like just

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Speaker 1: like a dog chip, you know, because if we could

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Speaker 1: track where our dogs are if they run away. Come

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Speaker 1: on now, So do you think I'll stop when they're eighteen? Like,

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Speaker 1: my parents haven't like it when I go to a

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Speaker 1: concert late at night and I'm whether I'm here in

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Speaker 1: Rhode Island or at home, they always want me to

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Speaker 1: text them when I get home, or they track me.

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Speaker 1: They're they're always tracking me. Well that's how Kans is

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Speaker 1: with me. So I was at coacher this weekend and

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Speaker 1: she calls me a lot, and I didn't answer her calls,

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Speaker 1: like for maybe twenty minutes, and I looked at my

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Speaker 1: text and she was like, Mom, you need to text

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Speaker 1: me back. You're giving me anxiety. She's so protective of me,

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Speaker 1: she's so responsible, it's crazy. I was actually just telling

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Speaker 1: Emma who's doing my makeup? That I'm like sometimes I'm like,

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Speaker 1: who's the parent here? But I still still won't let

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Speaker 1: her do anything without me. Okay, alright, well, I mean

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Speaker 1: it all makes sense. I could really talk about this

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Speaker 1: and being overprotective for a while. I know it's going

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Speaker 1: to sound like we're like helicopter parents, but there's lots

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Speaker 1: of scary things in this world today. I think it's warranted,

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Speaker 1: and I just to finish my thought. Like Dawson, if

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Speaker 1: there was such a chip, he could take it out

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Speaker 1: and I would never be like, you can't do this,

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Speaker 1: you can't do that. I just want to know where

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Speaker 1: you are and that you're safe. Like I don't like

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Speaker 1: even so much. Well, I mean that's that's too vague.

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Speaker 1: There's lots of bad things they could be doing. The

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Speaker 1: bottom line is I just want to know that you're safe. Okay, um, yeah, anyway, okay,

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Speaker 1: but sleep over at that age, like I I feel like,

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Speaker 1: have them sleep over. I have them stay over at

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Speaker 1: their friend's house late and then they can come home.

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Speaker 1: That's what I used to do. I used to not

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Speaker 1: even want to go to sleepovers. I just want to

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Speaker 1: hang out with my friends late and then my mom

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Speaker 1: could pay me up at eleven. Yeah, that's what we do.

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Speaker 1: We call it a late over. Oh that's cute. So

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Speaker 1: they can come over till it's bedtime. Yeah, that's perfect.

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Speaker 1: It makes them feel adult enough exactly. Yeah. I love

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Speaker 1: that constracts you because when I was in third grade,

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Speaker 1: I had mad separation anxiety for my parents. Whenever we

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Speaker 1: had a babysitter, I would be so worried that something

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Speaker 1: was going to happen to them, and I would like

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Speaker 1: I would just have to know where they were at

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Speaker 1: all times. But we didn't have such technology, and it

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Speaker 1: made me so nervous. And I would love to be

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Speaker 1: a kid now and track my parents. I'm so crazy.

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Speaker 1: What kind of kid wants to track their parents? Kinsley, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I love the reverse situation. You're partying and having fun

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Speaker 1: like a kid at Coachella, and she's like, mom, answer

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Speaker 1: your phone. Yeah so cute though. All right, well, Amanda,

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Speaker 1: I could talk to you about motherhood a lot longer,

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Speaker 1: but we have so many guests to get to today,

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Speaker 1: so go have fun, enjoy your shopping spree at Macie's.

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Speaker 1: I'm so jealous. What are you going to get? I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I just got here and I was getting

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Speaker 1: made gip gum, but I'm gonna go take a look. Okay, fun,

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Speaker 1: miss you by Now we are joined by not just

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Speaker 1: a mother, but the mother of the Bachelor franchise, Trista

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Speaker 1: Trista wren A Sutter, Trius Soter whatever you want to

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Speaker 1: go sum. She's also the host of our UM spinoff show,

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Speaker 1: formally Famous Or. She and Bob Guinea go back and

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Speaker 1: talk about the old days of Bachelor Nation after rewatching

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Speaker 1: old episodes. It's really fun. So so if you guys

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Speaker 1: um have or have not watched old episodes, you can

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Speaker 1: go and catch up with them, you know, go live

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Speaker 1: in the like to the odds. That will be fun.

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Speaker 1: Or you can relive old memories. That's also Yeah, we

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Speaker 1: have a lot of fun. Okay, Trisa, we've talked about

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Speaker 1: motherhood a bit. Now you're on my baby Shower podcast,

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Speaker 1: so I'm going to ask you like some fun, random,

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Speaker 1: not so like spiritual questions like, okay, have you given

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Speaker 1: your kids the sex talk? Yes? I mean minor thirteen

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Speaker 1: and fourteen, So yeah, compared to other moms here today

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Speaker 1: definitely had to be done. Um, so we did it?

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Speaker 1: Oh gosh, I want to say, did Ryan do your son?

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Speaker 1: And then did you do? Know? Okay, so tell me

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Speaker 1: everything started? Like how awkward was it? How nervous were you?

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Speaker 1: Where did you do it? Did you like lock him

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Speaker 1: in the car and You're like, I can't escape me here? No? Okay.

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Speaker 1: So about three years ago, I was with a friend

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Speaker 1: who had older kids, and I was just asking her

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Speaker 1: how do I how do I do the talk? How

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Speaker 1: do I what do I say? And she was like,

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Speaker 1: I have a perfect book for you. So she gave

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Speaker 1: me actually three books. I can't remember the name of it.

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Speaker 1: I'll send it to you after I get home, but um,

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Speaker 1: i'll send you the name. And so she let me

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Speaker 1: borrow these books and individually I I sat down with Blakesley,

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Speaker 1: and Blakesley is she's thirteen now, but she is way

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Speaker 1: more chatty than Max's. Max's personality, I think we've talked

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Speaker 1: about this probably is he's very much like Ryan, very

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Speaker 1: stoic and introverted, and even though we have a great relationship,

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Speaker 1: he is very introverted. So I was a little more

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Speaker 1: worried about Max, being that it would be harder to

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Speaker 1: talk to him. So I sit down with Blakesley. I

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Speaker 1: was like, I want you to read this book. We

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Speaker 1: kind of went through it together, and her eyes were

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Speaker 1: just like saucers, you know, like what are you talking about?

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Speaker 1: Your This is like the American girl book that my generation. Yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: actually I almost got that book. Um, but I figured

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Speaker 1: out like a puberty thing, the sex thing that's more

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Speaker 1: of like a girl's body change book. Yes, but I

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Speaker 1: think they I think they actually have a sex one

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Speaker 1: now anyway. So so with her, she was hysterical all questions,

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Speaker 1: you know, like are you kidding me? Like that's how

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Speaker 1: I really what are you talking about? Like I feel

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Speaker 1: like she was, um, kind of mad at me for like,

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Speaker 1: you know, telling her about this thing that happens to everyone,

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Speaker 1: puberty plus like you know, sex and that's how you're born,

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Speaker 1: you know, did you like say did you like say explicitly?

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Speaker 1: And then like the penis ki Oh yeah, we went

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Speaker 1: through everything. She was truly mindful. She didn't know about No,

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Speaker 1: she was younger. This was probably when she was ten.

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Speaker 1: I think she was either nine or ten, and that's

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Speaker 1: probably around the time like rumors started swirling at school

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Speaker 1: that this is how it happened, and you're like, you

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Speaker 1: are kid, and I think that TikTok had just started,

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Speaker 1: and so they were like I was worried that she

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Speaker 1: would find out from other people, and I wanted it

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Speaker 1: to be from me, So so I told her and

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Speaker 1: then Max, which you know, now he's had a phone

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Speaker 1: for a while and if you try to have a

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Speaker 1: conversation with him, you actually have to tell him to

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Speaker 1: put his phone down so he'll listen to you. But um,

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Speaker 1: he was. He sat we I did it in his room.

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Speaker 1: I closed the door so he didn't feel weird about,

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Speaker 1: you know, having his sister around, and we went through

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Speaker 1: the book too. I left the book with him. But

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Speaker 1: when we were in his room, he was completely focused

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Speaker 1: on me and and what I was saying, and super

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Speaker 1: respectful of everything I was saying and how I was

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Speaker 1: saying it. He didn't have a ton of questions, but

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Speaker 1: I was just really impressed that I didn't have to

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Speaker 1: continue to tell him to pay attention and that there

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Speaker 1: was this was an important conversation. Um, he was actually

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Speaker 1: just really respectful and and listened, and then I left

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Speaker 1: the book with him. And who knows if he actually

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Speaker 1: read any of it. We've talked UM a little more

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Speaker 1: about it since then. If anything ever comes up, UM,

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Speaker 1: and you know how to treat a woman and how

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Speaker 1: you have to be respectful and uh, I don't know.

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Speaker 1: It's a really really important conversation. And I was super nervous,

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Speaker 1: but it actually went really well. Do you think that

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Speaker 1: he had any idea from school? I think he probably

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Speaker 1: had somewhat of an idea, but he he was a

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Speaker 1: little older. UM. I feel like there is one. There

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Speaker 1: was a funny question he asked, but I cannot remember

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Speaker 1: what it was at this point. Ryan m Room remember.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, it actually just went. It went really well.

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Speaker 1: Now they know. I feel like it's so important. You know,

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Speaker 1: in my generation, my mom just gave me a book

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Speaker 1: and that's it and didn't talk at all about it.

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Speaker 1: And I wanted to be the one to have this

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Speaker 1: discussion with them because I feel like it instills that, um,

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Speaker 1: that sense of connection in them, so that they know

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Speaker 1: that they can come to me if they have any questions,

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Speaker 1: and of course go to Ryan too, but if they

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Speaker 1: have any questions or any difficulties, I want them to

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Speaker 1: always know that I am there for them and I

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Speaker 1: am more than happy to talk about anything with them.

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Speaker 1: So and when I was growing up, I didn't really

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Speaker 1: feel like I could go to my parents about that stuff.

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Speaker 1: It was just, you know, we hadn't talked about it

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Speaker 1: at all. She just handed me a book. And so

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Speaker 1: I think now Blakesley and I have really open communication

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Speaker 1: and I know that she knows she can come to me,

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Speaker 1: and I hope that Max does too. Oh that's awesome. Um.

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Speaker 1: Is there any times that you're watching TV with them

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Speaker 1: and something popped up and you're like, oh God, they're

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Speaker 1: too young to address this and I know what they're

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Speaker 1: going to ask about it? Oh my god, all the time,

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Speaker 1: but I can't remember it now because I feel like

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Speaker 1: now it comes up. Max has watched so many movies

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Speaker 1: that I don't even know what movies he's watched. I'm

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Speaker 1: not as worried about everything as I used to be

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Speaker 1: because he's almost fifteen years old and he'll go to

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Speaker 1: sleepovers and watch He loves horror movies. Oh, I cannot

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Speaker 1: stand horror movies. Totally into horror movies. And I'm sure

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Speaker 1: there's there's nudity and sexual content, and UM discuss sens.

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Speaker 1: But um, I can't remember one specific moment, but yes,

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Speaker 1: there have been a lot of moments where I feel

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Speaker 1: like we pause the TV. If anything is coming up,

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Speaker 1: we just pause it and then we redirect, go do

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Speaker 1: something else. Let's take a break, let's go to the bathroom,

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Speaker 1: and then maybe forward it to where we don't have

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Speaker 1: to watch that part together. A little awkward when you're

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Speaker 1: sitting with your parents and a sex scene comes on

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Speaker 1: any show. Um, I do. I feel like I might

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Speaker 1: have told you about this. So um, there we had

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Speaker 1: iPads I don't know, like seven eight years ago, and uh,

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Speaker 1: it was like a family iPad and I go on

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Speaker 1: to look on Safari for something and I open it

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Speaker 1: up and it is graphic. Let's just say, oh yeah, graphic.

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Speaker 1: And they were young, and I was like, what it

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Speaker 1: ended up? Um that I'm not gonna I'm not gonna

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Speaker 1: say who did this, um, because I don't know if

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Speaker 1: you know, maybe they'll listen someday. But um, it started

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Speaker 1: completely innocent, and that it was around Christmas time and

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Speaker 1: they were googling, um, baby Jesus, No, that's so funny.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. Oh yeah, I wonder what we'd find,

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Speaker 1: would we if we google, Okay, how did baby Jesus

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Speaker 1: turn into this baby Jesus? And then I think there

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Speaker 1: was a picture um of like that. Then it was

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Speaker 1: like baby boys and then baby boy butts. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: mean the most innocent thing turned into something not innocent

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Speaker 1: at all, Like how horrifying is that? So my recommendation

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Speaker 1: for parents, even if you think your kids it's we're

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Speaker 1: not looking at anything, they could be googling something so

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Speaker 1: so so innocent as baby Jesus, and so put the

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Speaker 1: most innocent thing you can think of, the innocent thing, um,

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Speaker 1: so put the there are like parental controls on Google

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Speaker 1: that you can um. I think every parent should do it,

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Speaker 1: no matter how young or old your kids are. Okay,

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Speaker 1: well those are some good tips. I mean maybe not Dawson.

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Speaker 1: He's not using it, but soon enough. Right now, he's

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Speaker 1: just really into his high contrast book. Yes, I saw that.

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Speaker 1: That was so cute. It's so cute. It's just black

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Speaker 1: and white imagery, and he he you throw it in

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Speaker 1: front of his face and then all of a sudden

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Speaker 1: he goes like his eyes just grow. It's so adorable. Enough.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sad he's not here. And you love your

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Speaker 1: responses on Instagram. So sweet. Oh yes, I love him,

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Speaker 1: love you. Thank you cut right, well, thanks for the

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Speaker 1: sex advice for my son in about a decade. Exactly.

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Speaker 1: You got a little time, Um, go enjoy your Macy's shopping,

398
00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:14,680
Speaker 1: and do you have any idea what you're gonna get,

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Speaker 1: Like if you had to, like say, your kids could

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Speaker 1: get you one thing from Macy's right now for Mother's Day?

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Speaker 1: What is at the top of your list? I don't

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00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:26,200
Speaker 1: know if they carry aviator Nation, but I'm super into

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00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:30,480
Speaker 1: that brand right now. What as is my daughter? It's

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00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:32,840
Speaker 1: like the rainbow they have like a rainbow stripe on

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Speaker 1: the side of the sweatpants or like across the jacket

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00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:40,800
Speaker 1: like puffy coats. Um, that sounds so it's so cute.

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00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:45,200
Speaker 1: Actually it's it's adorable. And then, um, honestly, I need jeans.

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00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:50,080
Speaker 1: I need jeans, Like, give me some just good ripped

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Speaker 1: up jeans and I'm a happy girl. All right, Well,

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Speaker 1: I think you can go find that at Macy's today.

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Speaker 1: So I have a great time shopping with the ladies.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, thanks for having me even though you're not here. Course, Okay,

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Speaker 1: thanks for like basically holding the fork down over there.

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00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:07,399
Speaker 1: Oh no, all good, all good. I got you okay

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00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:13,199
Speaker 1: by and before we get dog Mom Kitlin Miller Keys

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Speaker 1: on the podcast, I just wanted to thank Macy's one

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Speaker 1: more time for being the sponsor for this week's show.

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Speaker 1: Anything that you can think of for your mom for

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00:24:23,359 --> 00:24:25,560
Speaker 1: Mother's Day you could probably find at Macy's and you

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00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:29,320
Speaker 1: can find it at Macy's dot com slash gift finder

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00:24:29,440 --> 00:24:31,679
Speaker 1: if you just want to do your shopping online or

422
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:33,520
Speaker 1: you can find something online, then go and run to

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00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:45,200
Speaker 1: the store and pick it up. All right, We got

424
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 1: Klin on the line, and she's the kind of mom

425
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:51,680
Speaker 1: that I was just a mere three months ago, a

426
00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:56,520
Speaker 1: dog mom. Caitlin, what is the biggest responsibility as an

427
00:24:56,560 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 1: adoptive dog mom? Because you guys have basically fall stirred

428
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:04,200
Speaker 1: twice and then you've ended up adopting. So what is

429
00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,439
Speaker 1: it that you just like have in your soul that

430
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:12,760
Speaker 1: is like I need to mother these dogs? Well, it's

431
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:16,679
Speaker 1: so weird. If Dean hadn't broken his flag, what was

432
00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:18,199
Speaker 1: it like two years ago? I don't think we ever

433
00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:20,440
Speaker 1: would have had a dog because we were just traveling

434
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:23,000
Speaker 1: too much. Um So before he broke his leg, we

435
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:25,679
Speaker 1: were only home like one week at a time, and

436
00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:28,360
Speaker 1: then he broke his leg. We fostered Pappy, we fell

437
00:25:28,400 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 1: in love, and once Pappy past, we just felt this

438
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:36,040
Speaker 1: little emptiness in our homes. So then we found Alister

439
00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:39,159
Speaker 1: and adopted Alistair. But we've always been drawn to seniors

440
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:43,040
Speaker 1: because puppies are always going to get adopted, and I

441
00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:45,760
Speaker 1: think the senior ones, like people look at them, they're like, oh,

442
00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:48,280
Speaker 1: they're five or six or seven, and we don't want that.

443
00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:49,800
Speaker 1: We want our dog to it for a long time,

444
00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:52,679
Speaker 1: and but senior dogs are just the best. Ever. I

445
00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 1: encourage everyone to at least look at them. Well, that

446
00:25:57,040 --> 00:26:00,960
Speaker 1: is so sweet. That is so so sweet. You guys

447
00:26:01,320 --> 00:26:04,040
Speaker 1: really like create a cool life for your dogs, Like

448
00:26:04,119 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 1: you know, they travel with you, they go to events

449
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:09,199
Speaker 1: and stuff like that. Do you find that that is

450
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:13,919
Speaker 1: something that keeps them young? I honestly think so. I

451
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:17,600
Speaker 1: think traveling with dogs like they're always finding new things

452
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 1: to see, new things to smell. I think it definitely

453
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:23,840
Speaker 1: gave Happy a longer life. We haven't been able to

454
00:26:23,880 --> 00:26:26,520
Speaker 1: travel too much with Alistair yet, just because he is

455
00:26:27,760 --> 00:26:31,600
Speaker 1: more different Colt. He's with the trainer right now and

456
00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:33,520
Speaker 1: we're hoping like soon enough and the trainer even said

457
00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:37,479
Speaker 1: last night, soon enough we have people and he can

458
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:42,280
Speaker 1: be around people. It's just getting him trained first. And

459
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:44,800
Speaker 1: my last question for you is something that like I

460
00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:47,399
Speaker 1: struggle with now being a mom to a dog and

461
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:53,239
Speaker 1: a baby, and that is like how much do you

462
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 1: play with the dog during the day or does your

463
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:58,399
Speaker 1: dog just kind of like lounge around? Because I feel

464
00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:00,800
Speaker 1: so guilty because I'm like, I need like a designated

465
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,199
Speaker 1: play hour with Lois where she just gets all the

466
00:27:03,240 --> 00:27:05,800
Speaker 1: pets and we play catch and all that, but I

467
00:27:05,800 --> 00:27:09,959
Speaker 1: don't have time for it. Is that something that you

468
00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:15,399
Speaker 1: guys do on a daily basis? Is like it's just playtime? Yeah,

469
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:18,359
Speaker 1: it's kind of on Alistair's terms, Like Alistair gets super

470
00:27:18,440 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 1: hyper and suddenly he'll be like he'll just like start

471
00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:24,320
Speaker 1: play nipping at her hand or like pulling on our

472
00:27:24,359 --> 00:27:26,480
Speaker 1: shirt and he lets us know, like now it's time

473
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:28,399
Speaker 1: for you to throw the joy. It's time for you

474
00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:31,919
Speaker 1: to pay attention to me. Okay, that's so sweet. That

475
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:36,160
Speaker 1: also keeps them young and their heart healthy. And oh,

476
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:38,320
Speaker 1: there's not enough time in a day to be any

477
00:27:38,359 --> 00:27:40,960
Speaker 1: sort of mom. We need I need like another twelve

478
00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:44,560
Speaker 1: hours to really accomplish everything. I can't imagine it from

479
00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:46,920
Speaker 1: your perspective, but I feel that from just a jog

480
00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:52,720
Speaker 1: mom to perspective. Thank you all right, Umklin, thanks for

481
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:57,080
Speaker 1: joining us and um you can hear Kaylin regularly on

482
00:27:57,359 --> 00:28:00,879
Speaker 1: the Help I Suck At Dating podcast. Thanks for being here,

483
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:05,240
Speaker 1: Kalen Thy, thank you. Than We are now joined by

484
00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:09,800
Speaker 1: another bachelor mom, Ashley Fraser. My son wants to make

485
00:28:09,840 --> 00:28:13,159
Speaker 1: a little cameo appearance, so if you hear him winding

486
00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:18,600
Speaker 1: in the background, that's just some saying Hi Ashley. UM,

487
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:22,800
Speaker 1: My first question for you is does it ever get

488
00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:26,399
Speaker 1: to feel routine? Do you ever get used to the

489
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:30,280
Speaker 1: fact that I am now sitting with a baby carrier

490
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:34,000
Speaker 1: on my chest and my hair in a classic bomb bun.

491
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:37,199
Speaker 1: Haven't washed my face yet today, but I'm proud to

492
00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:39,920
Speaker 1: say that I have brushed my teeth. I will say

493
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:43,520
Speaker 1: it just changes. Like this stage, it just is one

494
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 1: and then the next one is gonna be totally different,

495
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:49,240
Speaker 1: and it's just gonna be as hard. It's just different.

496
00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:53,560
Speaker 1: It changes. But how do you do to like? How

497
00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:58,560
Speaker 1: oh Dawson, how do you do too? It doesn't it

498
00:28:58,560 --> 00:29:01,240
Speaker 1: seem possible? How a part are your girls? There? Two

499
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:05,280
Speaker 1: years apart almost to the day. Find that to be

500
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:08,400
Speaker 1: like ideal. Um, Jared and I are both two and

501
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,000
Speaker 1: a half years apart from our siblings, and that's kind

502
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 1: of what I want for Dawson. Um. Was it helpful

503
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:17,600
Speaker 1: that the one was able to talk and walk at

504
00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:20,720
Speaker 1: that point? Yes, since she was potty trained and so

505
00:29:21,280 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 1: pretty much potty trained all the way, so that was

506
00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:30,520
Speaker 1: very helpful. So, oh, he's so cute. I can't ry

507
00:29:30,640 --> 00:29:34,480
Speaker 1: pretty trained by two, I feel like that. But I mean,

508
00:29:34,480 --> 00:29:37,160
Speaker 1: we were in COVID, so we didn't having too much

509
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:39,440
Speaker 1: to do, so it made it a little easier of

510
00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:42,080
Speaker 1: a time. No one was going anywhere, so we didn't

511
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 1: have to worry about it. As Ashley is now listening

512
00:29:45,640 --> 00:29:50,960
Speaker 1: to my baby crying and the way I look. I

513
00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:54,120
Speaker 1: have to know what was the hardest phase of motherhood

514
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:57,760
Speaker 1: for you thus far and what was the most rewarding

515
00:29:57,840 --> 00:30:00,840
Speaker 1: In your favorite I would say at the beginning, when

516
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:04,640
Speaker 1: I first had Navy, my oldest, it was really hard

517
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:09,600
Speaker 1: because I let so many outside voices fulfill this like

518
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:13,400
Speaker 1: need to be a perfect mom. And I was telling

519
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:16,320
Speaker 1: someone earlier. Once I probably hit three or four months,

520
00:30:16,360 --> 00:30:19,640
Speaker 1: I realized, no one's going to know whether I take

521
00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:21,880
Speaker 1: their advice or not, why don't I just do it

522
00:30:21,960 --> 00:30:24,120
Speaker 1: my way? And Aaron and I had a big conversation

523
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:26,920
Speaker 1: about it, and he's like, do what your gut tells you.

524
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 1: You know, He's very much like, you're the mom, you

525
00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:32,760
Speaker 1: have the intuition. I'll follow your lead, which is very helpful.

526
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:34,959
Speaker 1: And I know that a lot of people don't get that,

527
00:30:35,040 --> 00:30:38,360
Speaker 1: but he was so helpful in that and that was priceless.

528
00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:42,120
Speaker 1: But once I let go, it really became so much

529
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:45,040
Speaker 1: easier because I was just just let what my gut

530
00:30:45,120 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 1: said lead me. Besides that, was there anything that you

531
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:55,360
Speaker 1: did significantly different between your first and second No, I

532
00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:59,280
Speaker 1: pretty much followed that gud of what felt right in

533
00:30:59,320 --> 00:31:01,760
Speaker 1: the moment. I mean I breastfed both of them for

534
00:31:01,760 --> 00:31:06,479
Speaker 1: such a long time. Um, Navy I breastfed for eighteen months,

535
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:12,120
Speaker 1: was pregnant, and then I breastfed Everley over a year,

536
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:15,080
Speaker 1: So I mean maybe that was a little bit different.

537
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:18,680
Speaker 1: But you know, we were in COVID, so we were

538
00:31:18,720 --> 00:31:22,040
Speaker 1: home a lot too, versus with Navy. We were out

539
00:31:22,040 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 1: and about showing her to everyone, and then the next

540
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:26,880
Speaker 1: one we were just home, so that was very different.

541
00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:31,000
Speaker 1: Oh well, I've got to know, do you see any

542
00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:34,520
Speaker 1: differences between the two, possibly because one one out more

543
00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:39,040
Speaker 1: than the other. Funny you say that because Everley growing

544
00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:42,800
Speaker 1: up in COVID is more outgoing than Navy. Navy is

545
00:31:42,840 --> 00:31:47,000
Speaker 1: pretty shy, which I'm surprised that that is not the

546
00:31:47,040 --> 00:31:50,160
Speaker 1: opposite way Everley. You would think, not being around people

547
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:52,200
Speaker 1: as much, she would be more shy, but she's not.

548
00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 1: So she's more my outgoing butterfly ash. We are um

549
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:03,680
Speaker 1: between a new business, a new house, and a new baby.

550
00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:07,280
Speaker 1: Jared and I definitely have not had a lot of

551
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:13,360
Speaker 1: date time couple time. How do you keep the relationship

552
00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:18,440
Speaker 1: thriving in a time like this because we're certainly not

553
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:21,920
Speaker 1: not do like we are great. We're just we are

554
00:32:21,960 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 1: not romantic, We're not like it's not like, oh, we're

555
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 1: just a cute, young, sprite couple. Is that gone forever? No,

556
00:32:30,840 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 1: it's not gone forever. I promise it comes back. But

557
00:32:34,640 --> 00:32:38,040
Speaker 1: just go out take some time for you guys. And

558
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:40,840
Speaker 1: someone once told me, go out and can you try

559
00:32:40,880 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 1: to not talk about the baby for a minute, And

560
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:45,800
Speaker 1: we do try that. It's really hard because you think

561
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:48,360
Speaker 1: about how cute they are and you miss them and

562
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:50,200
Speaker 1: then you go down this little memory of like, oh

563
00:32:50,240 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 1: my gosh, look how big navy is from last year

564
00:32:52,720 --> 00:32:55,400
Speaker 1: at this time, and but it does come back. It's

565
00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:59,680
Speaker 1: not gone forever, I promise. Okay. That is really really

566
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:04,000
Speaker 1: good to know. Um. And is there any advice from

567
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:08,800
Speaker 1: your mom or just like observations that you had growing

568
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:13,480
Speaker 1: up that you implant implemented in the lives of your daughters. Yeah,

569
00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:16,360
Speaker 1: that's really good. I think making sure they're in church,

570
00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:18,720
Speaker 1: our family is in church is such a good point

571
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:20,960
Speaker 1: for us because at the end of the day, that's

572
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:23,720
Speaker 1: the foundation that I want them raised on. So that's

573
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:27,840
Speaker 1: really important to me. My mom was tough. She you know,

574
00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:31,480
Speaker 1: if you weren't bleeding, you're fine, and so if you

575
00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:36,680
Speaker 1: weren't bleeding, keep going. Aaron is probably more nurturing when

576
00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:38,720
Speaker 1: it comes to like girls getting boo boos, Like he

577
00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 1: runs to them, and now they're starting to run to

578
00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:43,280
Speaker 1: him anytime they get a boo boo and I'm like,

579
00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:46,440
Speaker 1: you're okay, you're not like you know, So that's something

580
00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:49,360
Speaker 1: my mom definitely passed down, like this little tough cookie

581
00:33:49,400 --> 00:33:52,560
Speaker 1: side of you're it's it's really just all going to

582
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:56,000
Speaker 1: be okay, and your mom instinct. You can hear the cries,

583
00:33:56,080 --> 00:33:59,560
Speaker 1: you can hear the woes, the mommy crying. You know

584
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:02,360
Speaker 1: when they yell for you, you you know the difference between

585
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 1: whether they're hurt or they're not. So that's you know totally.

586
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:12,440
Speaker 1: It's so funny now, Like every time I am not

587
00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:15,719
Speaker 1: in the same room as him, I can just it's

588
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:20,719
Speaker 1: like I have a supersonic ear for crying. Now, I

589
00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:25,640
Speaker 1: wouldn't normally be able to hear like that level. Right.

590
00:34:25,680 --> 00:34:28,319
Speaker 1: Have you been in the shower and heard him crying? Yes,

591
00:34:28,680 --> 00:34:31,080
Speaker 1: I swear I've figured it out. I think it's the drain.

592
00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:34,480
Speaker 1: It's the way the water flows into the drain. It

593
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:37,080
Speaker 1: makes me think like my child is crying in the

594
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:42,080
Speaker 1: background one and like, But for the most part, it's not.

595
00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:49,520
Speaker 1: It's nothing. I don't know, irrational fear that that is

596
00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:53,000
Speaker 1: exactly when something terrible is going to happen. When I'm

597
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:56,120
Speaker 1: washing my hair soapas and my hair and I'm naked,

598
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 1: something is going to happen in that moment where I

599
00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:01,319
Speaker 1: have to rush someone to the hospital. That is my like,

600
00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:03,319
Speaker 1: when I think about what could be a nightmare that

601
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:07,840
Speaker 1: moment showing up at the hospital like that, do you

602
00:35:07,880 --> 00:35:12,760
Speaker 1: have any other anxieties that started when you first became

603
00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:15,239
Speaker 1: a mom that have kind of continued on. Yeah, I

604
00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:17,640
Speaker 1: I Aaron and I have this conversation all the time.

605
00:35:17,880 --> 00:35:19,759
Speaker 1: I feel I hate to say it, but I feel

606
00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:22,880
Speaker 1: like I became so morbid. I'm so fearful if something

607
00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:26,120
Speaker 1: happening to me. Yeah, my stairs for me, It's like,

608
00:35:26,200 --> 00:35:28,040
Speaker 1: every single time I go down the stairs with him,

609
00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:31,680
Speaker 1: I just see us falling. Don't walk with socks on

610
00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:35,360
Speaker 1: on woodstairs. Yeah, all those things I've learned to not do.

611
00:35:35,960 --> 00:35:38,399
Speaker 1: I'm just always afraid, Like when I travel, when I leave,

612
00:35:38,440 --> 00:35:40,359
Speaker 1: whenever I come, when I go, when they leave, when

613
00:35:40,360 --> 00:35:43,640
Speaker 1: they come and go, who's driving them. I've got to

614
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:45,760
Speaker 1: the point where I just really don't even want anyone

615
00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:48,560
Speaker 1: driving my child but me or Aaron. There's no need

616
00:35:48,600 --> 00:35:51,879
Speaker 1: for it. I don't think that anybody has driven him

617
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:53,799
Speaker 1: other than me and Jared, and I don't think I

618
00:35:53,840 --> 00:35:55,719
Speaker 1: want that to change. Just sorry, I just gave you

619
00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:59,920
Speaker 1: that anxiety. Now I've had the anxiety. Man, what is

620
00:36:00,440 --> 00:36:03,680
Speaker 1: the grandparents? His parents are like, we can keep a

621
00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:06,080
Speaker 1: car seat base in our cars too, just in case,

622
00:36:06,120 --> 00:36:11,480
Speaker 1: and I'm like, just definitely not you, Grandpa. Friend, because

623
00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:15,480
Speaker 1: you can drive. Just say yes, because at the end

624
00:36:15,560 --> 00:36:17,480
Speaker 1: you can kind of probably figure it out. Those are

625
00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:20,759
Speaker 1: other tips that I realized. You can kind of just

626
00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:23,480
Speaker 1: say okay, fine, that's great, and then you don't have

627
00:36:23,560 --> 00:36:25,440
Speaker 1: to take it, or you can figure something out and say,

628
00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:26,920
Speaker 1: you know what, I'm going to do it this time,

629
00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:29,040
Speaker 1: or Jared's going to take him this time. You know,

630
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 1: you can always figure out ways to maneuver around those situations.

631
00:36:32,760 --> 00:36:37,239
Speaker 1: I promise. Okay, Well, I really appreciate the advice, and

632
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:39,839
Speaker 1: I'm really glad you got to spend the day with

633
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:42,960
Speaker 1: Macy's getting your nails done and then like shopping and

634
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:46,080
Speaker 1: all of that. If there is one item at Macy's

635
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:49,040
Speaker 1: that your girls could get you for Mother's Day, what

636
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 1: would you want it to be? Oh? Man, maybe some

637
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:56,759
Speaker 1: Chanelle makeup. That's an easy go to, right, yes, that

638
00:36:57,000 --> 00:37:05,239
Speaker 1: is yeah, look at him. My goodness, I'm like heynes Okay, So,

639
00:37:05,320 --> 00:37:08,759
Speaker 1: thank you for joining us. Had a great day. I did,

640
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:22,200
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Ashley. Next up, on our Mother'sday special,

641
00:37:22,280 --> 00:37:27,920
Speaker 1: we have Annelie's puccini with her baby dog and her mom.

642
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:31,280
Speaker 1: So Annelie's how long have you been a puppy mom?

643
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:36,520
Speaker 1: We got posy in August and it's her one year

644
00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:40,799
Speaker 1: birthday next month, so yeah, she's just a little one.

645
00:37:40,840 --> 00:37:46,120
Speaker 1: Still so cute. How has that adjustment been Because people

646
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:50,840
Speaker 1: talk about waking up all the time with a human baby,

647
00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:53,239
Speaker 1: but those little puppies will wake you up a lot

648
00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:55,160
Speaker 1: in the middle of the night too. And and you

649
00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:59,960
Speaker 1: know what's nice, um, with my baby, my baby baby,

650
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:03,279
Speaker 1: if he goes to the bathroom, all I have to

651
00:38:03,320 --> 00:38:06,239
Speaker 1: do is go into his nursery and change him. But

652
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:09,759
Speaker 1: in the dog situation, you might be you know, if

653
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:13,600
Speaker 1: you're trying to properly drain walking them at four or

654
00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:16,839
Speaker 1: thirty in the morning, and that freaks me out, you know.

655
00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:19,279
Speaker 1: So it's kind of funny. I'm so used to like

656
00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:24,160
Speaker 1: dog life that there's been multiple times with Dawson it's like, oh,

657
00:38:24,239 --> 00:38:26,120
Speaker 1: after the speedy I'm going to have to take him out.

658
00:38:26,200 --> 00:38:27,719
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, you don't have to take him out.

659
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:30,440
Speaker 1: You just got to just piper. It's very really easy.

660
00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:31,960
Speaker 1: I can do what I want to do it. Well,

661
00:38:31,960 --> 00:38:33,440
Speaker 1: I guess you could. I mean they kind of tell

662
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:37,560
Speaker 1: you when they're like, okay, you get this thing off me. Um.

663
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:39,839
Speaker 1: But there was many times in the beginning that I

664
00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:42,279
Speaker 1: was like taking her out in the middle of the night,

665
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:44,839
Speaker 1: and uh, but you get used to it and you're

666
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:46,760
Speaker 1: just like it's funny. I think it's probably like with

667
00:38:46,760 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 1: with a baby baby too. You just you you're like

668
00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:53,319
Speaker 1: you do for the people and the things that you love,

669
00:38:53,440 --> 00:38:56,239
Speaker 1: you know, and you like you're you're you forget like

670
00:38:56,320 --> 00:38:59,600
Speaker 1: what you're doing, and you're just like your natural instincts taken,

671
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:02,480
Speaker 1: you know, take over, like for your baby or for

672
00:39:02,560 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 1: your dog or whatever. Mm hmm. Now your mom's there,

673
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:10,960
Speaker 1: she is. How many kids do you have, Sally? Just one?

674
00:39:11,040 --> 00:39:14,200
Speaker 1: That's all I could. You know, I got one, good one.

675
00:39:14,239 --> 00:39:16,439
Speaker 1: I wanted to like five or six, but I only

676
00:39:16,440 --> 00:39:19,520
Speaker 1: got one. My mom was told she could never have kids. Actually, yeah,

677
00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:23,280
Speaker 1: she's a miracle baby here. Oh my gosh, a miracle.

678
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:27,120
Speaker 1: That's amazing. Um So because of that and because there

679
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:31,040
Speaker 1: was only one child, what do you guys feel like

680
00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:34,279
Speaker 1: your relationship is even closer Do you think there's more

681
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:39,319
Speaker 1: of a friendship relationship than maybe if there's multiple siblings. Um? Yeah,

682
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:41,759
Speaker 1: probably because we didn't have to divide time with other

683
00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:45,200
Speaker 1: you know, brothers, sisters. But she was always really popularly

684
00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:47,880
Speaker 1: their friends who had siblings because she'd play with the

685
00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:50,440
Speaker 1: siblings and and you know, the parents would love that

686
00:39:53,239 --> 00:39:56,480
Speaker 1: since you did have um, since she was a miracle baby.

687
00:39:57,400 --> 00:40:00,319
Speaker 1: Do you think about other people that were in your

688
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:03,640
Speaker 1: position on Mother's Day and the fact that you know

689
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:07,319
Speaker 1: a lot of women out there one moms and they're

690
00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:10,040
Speaker 1: having a hard time doing so, Oh yeah, definitely. I

691
00:40:10,040 --> 00:40:12,680
Speaker 1: mean I pretty much thought we were gonna have to

692
00:40:12,760 --> 00:40:14,960
Speaker 1: just well, it wasn't a bad way to go, but

693
00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:17,200
Speaker 1: we were in the process of adopting, and my mom

694
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:19,560
Speaker 1: did in vitro and she I mean, she was definitely

695
00:40:19,760 --> 00:40:21,799
Speaker 1: one of the I mean, you could probably relate to

696
00:40:21,800 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 1: a lot of women that have had a trouble, have

697
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:28,320
Speaker 1: had trouble getting pregnant or you know, yeah, it seemed

698
00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:30,600
Speaker 1: like all my friends were getting pregnant, but before they

699
00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:33,600
Speaker 1: even wanted to, you know, with the first time they

700
00:40:33,640 --> 00:40:37,600
Speaker 1: even thought about it, it was like there they were. Um,

701
00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:39,319
Speaker 1: so it's kind of one of the last lest of

702
00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:42,000
Speaker 1: my friends. But um, you know, I didn't give up

703
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:44,680
Speaker 1: hope that either we had adopt or it happened naturally.

704
00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:47,120
Speaker 1: And once I had her, I said, okay, now I

705
00:40:47,120 --> 00:40:50,160
Speaker 1: can keep going. But and I have a step brother now,

706
00:40:50,360 --> 00:40:55,200
Speaker 1: so it feels like it's funny how you know, how

707
00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:57,879
Speaker 1: how family just like comes together at some point. Now

708
00:40:57,920 --> 00:41:01,120
Speaker 1: we just have a big modern family and nieces and

709
00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:06,080
Speaker 1: nephews and you know, like my stepdad's ex wife comes

710
00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:09,279
Speaker 1: to holiday functions and you know, it's just like one

711
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:11,640
Speaker 1: big extended family, which is so nice. You know, you

712
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:13,400
Speaker 1: don't always get the family that you thought you were

713
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:15,880
Speaker 1: going to get, but you get the family that you

714
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:21,120
Speaker 1: you need. Well in her her stepbrother is also an

715
00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:23,279
Speaker 1: only child, so both of them wouldn't have had, you know,

716
00:41:23,320 --> 00:41:26,600
Speaker 1: extended family, So it worked out. That does work out

717
00:41:26,640 --> 00:41:29,480
Speaker 1: really nicely. Analyst, Do you want to be a mom

718
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:32,600
Speaker 1: one day? Oh? Absolutely, I'm in the process of freezing

719
00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:36,880
Speaker 1: my eggs right now, so hopefully that's in the cards.

720
00:41:37,960 --> 00:41:39,839
Speaker 1: When did you decide that? If you don't mind, I'd

721
00:41:39,840 --> 00:41:41,280
Speaker 1: love to get to know a little bit more about

722
00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:44,040
Speaker 1: that decision. Um, It's been something I've been thinking about

723
00:41:44,080 --> 00:41:47,479
Speaker 1: for I mean a long time, but it's just hard

724
00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:50,799
Speaker 1: because you I'm thirty seven now, so I feel like

725
00:41:50,880 --> 00:41:54,759
Speaker 1: every relationships that I've been in, I'm like, maybe this

726
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,080
Speaker 1: is the one that I'm gonna have kids with, and

727
00:41:57,120 --> 00:42:00,279
Speaker 1: I'll hold off and then that relationship doesn't work out,

728
00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:02,080
Speaker 1: and then I put it off a little bit longer,

729
00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 1: and then I think you can put off certain things

730
00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:07,879
Speaker 1: in your life. But I think at thirty seven now

731
00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:09,880
Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, I gotta stop putting this off and

732
00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:12,840
Speaker 1: I need to even if I am in the perfect

733
00:42:12,840 --> 00:42:15,200
Speaker 1: relationship that I think maybe this is the guy, Like,

734
00:42:15,239 --> 00:42:18,160
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna wait for that to be the reason

735
00:42:18,239 --> 00:42:21,480
Speaker 1: that I, um wait anymore. I'm this is like it's

736
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:24,319
Speaker 1: a fully decision for me at this point where I'm like,

737
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:26,120
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna do it and it's gonna be my

738
00:42:26,120 --> 00:42:28,560
Speaker 1: little nest egg and if I need them, I need them.

739
00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:31,319
Speaker 1: You know. Do you think that's going to take the

740
00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:33,480
Speaker 1: pressure off dating and you can just kind of relax

741
00:42:33,520 --> 00:42:36,600
Speaker 1: and enjoy without feeling your biological clock tick? Oh? I

742
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:39,400
Speaker 1: think absolutely. I've heard so many stories of people be

743
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:42,200
Speaker 1: like yeah, as soon as I like, you don't have

744
00:42:42,239 --> 00:42:46,200
Speaker 1: that energy of like I needed this to happen. You know,

745
00:42:46,400 --> 00:42:51,360
Speaker 1: you're not forcing it anymore, Like I I completely feel you. Um,

746
00:42:51,400 --> 00:42:53,440
Speaker 1: I was going to give it. I was going to

747
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:56,680
Speaker 1: give egg freezing to myself for my thirtieth birthday if

748
00:42:56,680 --> 00:42:59,080
Speaker 1: it weren't for Jared coming around just like a couple

749
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:01,960
Speaker 1: of weeks beforehand. Yeah, I think. I mean it's a

750
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:04,399
Speaker 1: smart decision. I think for anyone who's like who that's

751
00:43:04,400 --> 00:43:09,520
Speaker 1: a that's a question. It's just a yeah, look into it,

752
00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 1: see what you're able to do, and and and put

753
00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:17,040
Speaker 1: your you know, fertility before anything else, because you know

754
00:43:17,200 --> 00:43:19,680
Speaker 1: you're you don't have forever with that. That's the thing.

755
00:43:20,120 --> 00:43:25,560
Speaker 1: There's a timeline for sure, I know. Um, so what

756
00:43:25,560 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 1: what part of the process are you about now? If

757
00:43:27,239 --> 00:43:31,400
Speaker 1: you don't mind sharing fairly I mean fairly early. I'm

758
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:34,600
Speaker 1: I think my my retrieval is scheduled right now for

759
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:39,960
Speaker 1: May five, so right around the corner. I mean, awesome, Yeah,

760
00:43:40,600 --> 00:43:43,040
Speaker 1: I know, but I mean it's pretty at this stage,

761
00:43:43,040 --> 00:43:45,799
Speaker 1: it's pretty easy. Um, there's nothing I really have to

762
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:48,160
Speaker 1: do except for like tell my doctor when I'm on

763
00:43:48,239 --> 00:43:50,719
Speaker 1: my period or not, and then that's it. To kind

764
00:43:50,719 --> 00:43:53,280
Speaker 1: of figure out really yeah, to figure out like when

765
00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:56,120
Speaker 1: it is going to be the best time to collect

766
00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:59,640
Speaker 1: the eggs. I thought that you had to do shots

767
00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:02,320
Speaker 1: in the Mormon and so I will, but it won't

768
00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:05,400
Speaker 1: be until I think it's next week. I go in

769
00:44:05,440 --> 00:44:09,160
Speaker 1: on Monday actually, and then we'll start like figuring out

770
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:13,319
Speaker 1: when that all happens. Honestly, I feel so naive. It's

771
00:44:13,320 --> 00:44:16,759
Speaker 1: funny because I've always felt like I get babies, I

772
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:20,719
Speaker 1: get you know. I've always been really into fertility and

773
00:44:20,760 --> 00:44:23,959
Speaker 1: like motherhood and all that stuff. Um, So I thought

774
00:44:24,000 --> 00:44:25,640
Speaker 1: that it would be something that I know a little

775
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:27,960
Speaker 1: bit more about. But going in for my first appointment,

776
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:29,840
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, my gosh, I know nothing about

777
00:44:29,880 --> 00:44:32,080
Speaker 1: this process. I mean, when my mom did in vitro.

778
00:44:32,200 --> 00:44:35,759
Speaker 1: It's funny. Um my only memory really of it was

779
00:44:36,719 --> 00:44:39,759
Speaker 1: her and my dad were kind of like in a

780
00:44:39,880 --> 00:44:42,399
Speaker 1: rocky place at that time, and so when my dad left,

781
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:46,400
Speaker 1: she was still in the process of of the hormones,

782
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:49,560
Speaker 1: and so I gave her a couple of her shots

783
00:44:49,600 --> 00:44:54,759
Speaker 1: like as a child. Wow. Wow, Okay, Well, I mean

784
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:56,440
Speaker 1: I know I'm getting kind of personal here, but I

785
00:44:56,480 --> 00:45:01,240
Speaker 1: am curious and like I am vulnerable. You know that

786
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:04,440
Speaker 1: Analy's was your miracle baby because the doctor said that

787
00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 1: you probably wouldn't be able to conceive naturally, but you

788
00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:09,879
Speaker 1: but you did. No. I I got pregnant, but then

789
00:45:09,880 --> 00:45:11,879
Speaker 1: I lost the baby and then they said my other

790
00:45:11,920 --> 00:45:15,239
Speaker 1: tube was was damaged and this and that. So they said,

791
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:17,440
Speaker 1: you know, you have like ten chance of maybe ever

792
00:45:17,480 --> 00:45:20,520
Speaker 1: getting pregnant on your own. And I just you know,

793
00:45:20,680 --> 00:45:23,600
Speaker 1: every cycle that I wasn't, I kept thinking, oh my goodness.

794
00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:26,600
Speaker 1: So then we were looking in vitro. Well, we lived

795
00:45:26,600 --> 00:45:29,160
Speaker 1: in an adoption first and then we had her, so

796
00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:31,120
Speaker 1: I didn't think I need to go in vitro because

797
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:33,440
Speaker 1: I thought i'd do it naturally again. But so in

798
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:36,600
Speaker 1: v was after me. Yeah, okay, so you did start

799
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:39,960
Speaker 1: that after you. It's amazing to know that thirty seven

800
00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:44,040
Speaker 1: years ago we were doing IVF. Yeah, certainly something that

801
00:45:44,040 --> 00:45:46,400
Speaker 1: they didn't talk about too much back then. Yeah, I

802
00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:49,480
Speaker 1: think it was a lot more taboo, like you know,

803
00:45:49,719 --> 00:45:52,960
Speaker 1: you you weren't there was something broken, you know, if

804
00:45:53,280 --> 00:45:54,759
Speaker 1: if you had to go that route, and so I

805
00:45:54,760 --> 00:45:56,840
Speaker 1: think a lot of people kept it so much more

806
00:45:56,920 --> 00:46:00,239
Speaker 1: hidden where it's like I love that now and we're

807
00:46:00,280 --> 00:46:03,040
Speaker 1: having you know, children later in life and like all

808
00:46:03,040 --> 00:46:06,200
Speaker 1: of these things that or I've had like friends who

809
00:46:06,239 --> 00:46:10,040
Speaker 1: have not postpartum, but like they have depression during their

810
00:46:10,040 --> 00:46:13,359
Speaker 1: pregnancy and you know, we'll struggle with that. So I'm

811
00:46:13,400 --> 00:46:16,040
Speaker 1: so glad that there's so many of these like topics

812
00:46:16,080 --> 00:46:19,400
Speaker 1: around that because we see it's like Instagram versus reality.

813
00:46:19,440 --> 00:46:22,200
Speaker 1: We see like one version of things that just seems

814
00:46:22,320 --> 00:46:25,440
Speaker 1: so blissful and wonderful. I'm sure there's moments that are

815
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:27,760
Speaker 1: like that, but and I'm sure there's some people that

816
00:46:27,760 --> 00:46:30,120
Speaker 1: that's how it is. But then there's all these other stories,

817
00:46:30,160 --> 00:46:33,120
Speaker 1: and it's good that people are being able to feel

818
00:46:33,120 --> 00:46:36,799
Speaker 1: seen in in those stories, you know, Yes, And I'm

819
00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:39,759
Speaker 1: so grateful for you guys both share sharing both of

820
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:44,719
Speaker 1: those journeys. I really appreciate that it was an aspect

821
00:46:44,719 --> 00:46:46,360
Speaker 1: of motherhood that I didn't think we were gonna be

822
00:46:46,360 --> 00:46:48,600
Speaker 1: able to talk about today, and I'm glad we did. Yeah,

823
00:46:49,280 --> 00:46:57,360
Speaker 1: I'm so distracted because Dawson's little face so silly right now, listeners.

824
00:46:57,560 --> 00:46:59,359
Speaker 1: His eyes are just bugging out of his head looking

825
00:46:59,400 --> 00:47:03,600
Speaker 1: at the scory. All right, Well, thank you ladies for

826
00:47:03,719 --> 00:47:05,760
Speaker 1: joining us. I hope you had a great day thanks

827
00:47:05,760 --> 00:47:08,880
Speaker 1: to Macie's and you're able to get some goodies for

828
00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:12,600
Speaker 1: Mother's Day. To you, I have a little something in

829
00:47:12,640 --> 00:47:15,680
Speaker 1: the I literally put in the mail for you yesterday.

830
00:47:16,120 --> 00:47:18,120
Speaker 1: So is that a book? It's a book and a

831
00:47:18,160 --> 00:47:22,200
Speaker 1: little something for Dawson. So thank you so much. Yeah,

832
00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:25,440
Speaker 1: analy's quickly, please tell everybody about your new book. I

833
00:47:25,480 --> 00:47:27,520
Speaker 1: wrote a book called a p Unwritten. It is a

834
00:47:27,560 --> 00:47:31,840
Speaker 1: collection of my poetry and art that sort of journeys

835
00:47:31,960 --> 00:47:36,400
Speaker 1: through love, heartbreak and healing and uh and it's just amazing.

836
00:47:36,400 --> 00:47:38,680
Speaker 1: It's like I've gotten so much feedback already of people

837
00:47:38,719 --> 00:47:41,480
Speaker 1: who have been like, oh, I totally conceive my story

838
00:47:41,520 --> 00:47:43,920
Speaker 1: and that I relate and I feel like when at

839
00:47:43,920 --> 00:47:45,839
Speaker 1: the end of the day, like, that's why I think

840
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:48,560
Speaker 1: people love you so much, because you're so relatable and

841
00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:51,160
Speaker 1: so many levels, and like why I think talking about

842
00:47:51,160 --> 00:47:54,239
Speaker 1: all of these things and like and sharing just a raw,

843
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:58,200
Speaker 1: vulnerable version of like my heartbreak and things that I've

844
00:47:58,239 --> 00:48:01,040
Speaker 1: been through. It's just it gives people a chance to

845
00:48:01,040 --> 00:48:04,840
Speaker 1: feel like they're being seen. So I think it's so important. Awesome.

846
00:48:04,880 --> 00:48:07,600
Speaker 1: I'm so excited to read it. Yeah, you'll get it soon.

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00:48:08,280 --> 00:48:11,400
Speaker 1: Thank you, all right, see a lady, it's bye. Thank

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00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:14,680
Speaker 1: you all right almost a misus listeners. That is our

849
00:48:14,719 --> 00:48:19,200
Speaker 1: Mother's Day special addition, thanks to Macy's, don't forget to

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00:48:19,360 --> 00:48:22,959
Speaker 1: head over to Macy's dot com slash gift finder if

851
00:48:23,640 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 1: you have no idea what to get your mom, okay,

852
00:48:25,560 --> 00:48:28,640
Speaker 1: because Macy's has got you covered in that department. And

853
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:30,719
Speaker 1: you can order it right there on the website, or

854
00:48:30,800 --> 00:48:34,399
Speaker 1: you can go find something online and then go pick

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00:48:34,440 --> 00:48:36,960
Speaker 1: it up in store. They have everything you know, think

856
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:43,960
Speaker 1: about it, make up, perfume, how swears, um clothes, shoes.

857
00:48:44,760 --> 00:48:47,600
Speaker 1: Macy's has got some beautiful stuff in there, So check

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00:48:47,640 --> 00:48:49,799
Speaker 1: it out. And thank you again to all the moms

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00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:52,960
Speaker 1: who joined us, and shout out to all the moms

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00:48:52,960 --> 00:48:56,880
Speaker 1: out there. Now more than ever, I have an appreciation

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00:48:57,080 --> 00:48:59,880
Speaker 1: for all the hard work that is involved in our lives.

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00:49:00,239 --> 00:49:05,560
Speaker 1: You guys are all seriously superwomen. Bye. Follow the Benn

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00:49:05,560 --> 00:49:08,560
Speaker 1: and Ashley I Almost Famous podcasts on I Heart Radio

864
00:49:08,719 --> 00:49:11,040
Speaker 1: or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.