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Speaker 1: This is John, this is Sam, your og Okay Storytime

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Speaker 1: podcast hosts, and we have some spectacular stories coming up.

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Speaker 2: But real quick, we got a two minute break from

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Speaker 2: our lovely sponsors keeping this ship sailing.

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Speaker 1: My sister didn't honor our argument, so I decided to

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Speaker 1: no longer be involved with her. No honor, no involvement.

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Speaker 1: That's the rule. I really need some feedback on this

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Speaker 1: because it's eating away at me. Back in June, my

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Speaker 1: grandfather passed away. My grandmother passed away four years ago.

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Speaker 1: On the day that my grandfather passed, my father called

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Speaker 1: me forty four female and offered me his home as

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Speaker 1: my husband, thirty five mal and I are looking to

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Speaker 1: move where my immediate family lives. By the way, this

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Speaker 1: comes from Hoy Poy pink fog on the r slash

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Speaker 1: Okay Storytime subr. So my husband and I discussed it

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Speaker 1: and we accepted the offer. A few days later, my sister,

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Speaker 1: forty two female called me and asked if she and

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Speaker 1: her husband could live in the house until we arrived.

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Speaker 1: We were looking to move in about a year and

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Speaker 1: a half from now because they wanted to be able

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Speaker 1: to live free and save up for a down payment

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Speaker 1: on a house, since the house would be sitting empty

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Speaker 1: until we arrived. I said, of course they could. Fast

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Speaker 1: forward to a couple weeks ago, my son, tu Mel,

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Speaker 1: and I flew out to Texas for my grandfather's memorial,

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Speaker 1: and while I was there, my sister was moving things

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Speaker 1: into the empty house and started to get things situated.

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Speaker 1: I was missing what I wanted to do with it

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Speaker 1: when we eventually moved in, and my sister looked kind

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Speaker 1: of annoyed. I didn't really talk more about it after that.

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Speaker 1: At one point, my father asked if they needed a

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Speaker 1: couple of months past when we arrived to get things

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Speaker 1: finalized and moved out. Would we be okay with that? Again,

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Speaker 1: I said it on mind. My husband and I own

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Speaker 1: a home, so we know the process can be lengthy

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Speaker 1: and things can go sideways. Yesterday, my husband texted me

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Speaker 1: and asked if everything was okay. I told him that

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Speaker 1: while I was busy at work, all was fine. But

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Speaker 1: why was he asking? He told me my sister started

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Speaker 1: texting him. My sister said to him this verbatim. I

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Speaker 1: was just curious if you've been brought up to the

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Speaker 1: speed about the house out here. Hooy POI pink fog

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Speaker 1: knows that my grandparents and my dad offered it to

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Speaker 1: us first, and that we plan to live there for

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Speaker 1: a while before we can save enough money to buy

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Speaker 1: a place of our own. But while she was out

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Speaker 1: there a couple of weeks ago, she really made it

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Speaker 1: seem like she think you guys are moving right in.

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Speaker 1: When my father offered the home to me, I was

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Speaker 1: not made aware that the house was offered to her first.

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Speaker 1: When my husband showed me the text, I called my

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Speaker 1: dad and asked if that was true. He told me yes,

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Speaker 1: but that my sister had softly declined. He said her

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Speaker 1: words were, I don't think we want to do that,

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Speaker 1: so it was offered to me. My husband then tells

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Speaker 1: her it's fine because we're good eighteen months away from moving.

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Speaker 1: My sister then throws this fabulous curveball, Yeah, we were

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Speaker 1: thinking around five years. Once my husband told me that part,

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Speaker 1: I became livid. She knew we planned to move in

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Speaker 1: January twenty twenty six. She only asked to stay in

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Speaker 1: the house until we arrived, and my dad asked for

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Speaker 1: a couple additional months after arrival just in case, And

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Speaker 1: now she decided that they're staying for five years. Immediately,

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Speaker 1: I blew up on my sister and told her that

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Speaker 1: she's got some big balls if she thinks she can

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Speaker 1: attempt to paint this to my husband, like I'm taking

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Speaker 1: what's rightfully hers away from her. Bottom line, you said no,

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Speaker 1: and we said yes, and now you've decided you want

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Speaker 1: it all, you want it after all that you're just

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Speaker 1: going to take it for however long you want. Then

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Speaker 1: I then told her I will no longer be talking

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Speaker 1: to her about this and she will not text my

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Speaker 1: husband about this again. She went silent, and I called

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Speaker 1: my dad to fill him on her new five year

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Speaker 1: plan and that because the home is in his name,

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Speaker 1: we can communicate about the home through him, as I

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Speaker 1: was not talking directly to her about this anymore. So

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Speaker 1: am I the ahole for being mad and blowing up

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Speaker 1: at my sister about going back on the original agreement.

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Speaker 1: And honestly, I'd like to know if anyone thinks that

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Speaker 1: a soft decline is enough to come back and say,

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Speaker 1: we want it after all, so we're going to take it.

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Speaker 1: I spoke to my father this morning about what he

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Speaker 1: spoke with my sister. She denied, saying it would take

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Speaker 1: five years, but it would definitely be at least a

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Speaker 1: couple of years. I told my father, we have it

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Speaker 1: in a text message of her saying it would be

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Speaker 1: five years. My husband sent the text conversation screenshot to

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Speaker 1: my father after I relayed this to him. I made

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Speaker 1: it clear that this was what she does and how

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Speaker 1: she tries to twist things to her advantage. I also

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Speaker 1: made it crystal clear that I feel that he needs

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Speaker 1: to help hold that she declined when she when he

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Speaker 1: offered it to her, and that we said yes to

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Speaker 1: the offer. I explained that in reality, if this was

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Speaker 1: happening outside the family arrangement, there's no way in HG

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Speaker 1: Double Hockey six anyone else would give her the house

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Speaker 1: thank rintal agreement type of situation. I also made it

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Speaker 1: clear that if he decided to let her do what

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Speaker 1: she wanted instead of honoring the agreement she made with me,

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Speaker 1: then we would never come to Texas for any reason.

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Speaker 1: My dad was unhappy to hear that and didn't want

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Speaker 1: this to tear the family apart. I told him he

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Speaker 1: needed to hold her accountable for her behavior. He said

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Speaker 1: he understood and would want to be meeting with my

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Speaker 1: sister and her husband in a week or so to

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Speaker 1: discuss in detail, and may or may not need to

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Speaker 1: call me to be involved in the discussion. So that's

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Speaker 1: all for right now. I won't have any further updates

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Speaker 1: I think until that time. Thank you to everyone for

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Speaker 1: your support and advice. Here's the update. I spoke to

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Speaker 1: my father yesterday. He decided to compromise and asked us

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Speaker 1: to hold off until moving until January twenty twenty seven.

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Speaker 1: We had originally planned for January twenty twenty six, so

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Speaker 1: my sister could have two years rather than just one.

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Speaker 1: While I am not happy with this decision, I am

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Speaker 1: not so stubborn as to dig my heels in. I

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Speaker 1: am always open to compromise. However, while my husband is

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Speaker 1: okay with this decision, he won't be solidly behind it

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Speaker 1: because he asked my father for a written agreement between

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Speaker 1: the three parties us, my dad, my sister, and her husband.

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Speaker 1: It must be notarized as well. No response from my

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Speaker 1: dad yet about the agreement in writing. Oh, that's so crucial.

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Speaker 1: You gotta have that.

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Speaker 2: Mmm, you gotta have that With the sister who clearly

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Speaker 2: is trying to always push the goalposts.

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Speaker 1: We were feeling like he will not agree to that

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Speaker 1: and that this is where we will draw the line

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Speaker 1: in the sand. If he declines this request, then not

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Speaker 1: only will we be going with our Plan B, we

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Speaker 1: will be going no contact with my dad and sister

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Speaker 1: and her husband. So that's for the update now. Thank

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Speaker 1: you to everyone who had a lot of support and

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Speaker 1: kindness on my original post. It gave me a lot

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Speaker 1: to think about.

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Speaker 3: Edit.

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Speaker 1: Yep, just like y'all thought, Dad said no to the

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Speaker 1: written agreement. He said he's instead going to make some

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Speaker 1: changes to his will that will settle the matter for good.

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Speaker 1: That said, I asked for more info and said he

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Speaker 1: will share with me, my two sisters, and our husbands

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Speaker 1: once the changes are made. At it too. After putting

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Speaker 1: a lot of thought into this and reviewing all of

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Speaker 1: your comments, I told my husband that I will no

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Speaker 1: longer wish to move to Texas. My family, minus my

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Speaker 1: youngest sister, who is not involved, has made me feel

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Speaker 1: very unwelcome at this point, and honestly, I couldn't care

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Speaker 1: less about what's in my dad's will. I have always

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Speaker 1: loved my dad for the person who he is, not

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Speaker 1: what he can give me. We've decided to go with

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Speaker 1: Plan B moving to Colorado. We have an update to

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Speaker 1: I have to go right back. Wait do they already

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Speaker 1: live in Texas? Where do they live before?

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Speaker 2: It's not even that I disagree with the principle, It's

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Speaker 2: just that I disagree with the execution.

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Speaker 1: I don't think it's worthy of cutting off I did

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Speaker 1: in that us I do. I feel like Ope has

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Speaker 1: been her whole life. I wish you would talk about this.

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Speaker 1: Maybe she will here in a second. She wants this,

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Speaker 1: Sister wants it her way. Sister always gets it her way.

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Speaker 1: It's been like the her whole life, and she's upset

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Speaker 1: with it because if she's gonna go there, live her

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Speaker 1: life there, and this is happening right now before she's

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Speaker 1: even over there, That's that's the life I wouldn't want

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Speaker 1: to live in. I don't know. Tell me how you

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Speaker 1: feel face.

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Speaker 2: Pard to me, it's just like if you have you

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Speaker 2: if it's been like that your whole life, shouldn't you

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Speaker 2: have learned how to work around.

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Speaker 1: It by now? No? No, no, I disagree update too, Kyl.

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Speaker 1: This is going to be a short and final update

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Speaker 1: for most of those who are new check out this link.

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Speaker 1: After sitting on our decision for a couple of weeks,

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Speaker 1: to ensure I was not being hasty. Finally called my dad. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: I wanted to go to the petty row and wait

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Speaker 1: until just before we're to move, and had gotten our

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Speaker 1: word that her sister was mostly moved out to tell

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Speaker 1: him we're not coming to Texas. However, spite what many

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Speaker 1: of you think of my dad at this point, I

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Speaker 1: still love and respect my father and therefore felt obligated

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Speaker 1: to tell him. I called him yesterday. I called him

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Speaker 1: yesterday after I knew he was home from church and

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Speaker 1: told him that we just could give the house to

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Speaker 1: my sister, as we decided that it would be best

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Speaker 1: for us and our son to reside in Colorado instead.

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Speaker 1: I informed him that I've decided to go no contact

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Speaker 1: with my sister and not to bother wasting his breath

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Speaker 1: trying to talk to me out of it. I told

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Speaker 1: him that I was no longer going to allow her

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Speaker 1: to continue to pull this crap with me. My dad

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Speaker 1: asked what else she had done, because he couldn't believe

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Speaker 1: she's done this to me before. I told him that

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Speaker 1: while this wasn't exactly the same as others, it's her

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Speaker 1: tactics that she uses to dig herself out of holes

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Speaker 1: while dropping the dirt on me, making me look like

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Speaker 1: the bad guy. But you'll never be the bad guy

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Speaker 1: if you join us live every weekday at three pm PST.

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Speaker 1: Just tap a profile. That's right. Dad seemed disappointed. No

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Speaker 1: matter what Reddit thinks of my dad, I wanted my

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Speaker 1: son to grow up around him and to learn from him.

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Speaker 1: I've completely blocked my sister on all avenues. My youngest

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Speaker 1: sister and I are still in contact. We do not

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Speaker 1: talk about her sister or her husband. I've respected her

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Speaker 1: request to remain in Switzerland and the whole thing. I've

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Speaker 1: also placed my dad and my mom on LCS status. Folks,

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Speaker 1: I implore you to always remember one thing, the quote

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Speaker 1: that my family loves to toss at each other when

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Speaker 1: there's a dispute, blood is thicker than water. But my

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Speaker 1: dear reditor friends, that's not the full quote. The full

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Speaker 1: quote is the blood of the Covenant is thicker than

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Speaker 1: the water of the womb. Remember that, okay, Govenant, the promise,

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Speaker 1: the blood of the covenants, and that is the whole thing. Guys,

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Speaker 1: tell me, if you agree with Dakota or me, I

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Speaker 1: just agree fully with them. You already know where we

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Speaker 1: side with things.

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Speaker 2: I just think that there's no reason they couldn't push

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Speaker 2: back the time, Like, what's the reason that they have

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Speaker 2: to move in that exact time frame they want?

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Speaker 1: They want their son to at a young age to

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Speaker 1: live near the father, father, near the immediate family, and

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Speaker 1: to learn from him. And they're like, you know what grandfather,

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Speaker 1: so his grandfather. Yeah, so they're like, we'll come in

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Speaker 1: January twenty twenty six. How old is their kid too?

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Speaker 1: Right now?

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Speaker 2: So in three years of be five, that's plenty of time.

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Speaker 2: It's the perfect age to start being around a grandparent

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Speaker 2: and developing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and they were okay with that ship. But since

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Speaker 1: they didn't get a writ in agreement, she's like, this

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Speaker 1: is all so sketchy because three years from now they

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Speaker 1: might be like, oh wait, wait wait, can you wait

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Speaker 1: another year? Oh wait, wait, can't you wait another in

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Speaker 1: the will? So it's not it could get all messed up.

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Speaker 1: But and the sister's always done stuff like this, And

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Speaker 1: who knows if she's gonna do it again. Because sister

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Speaker 1: said five years. You don't think after three years she

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Speaker 1: can swiddle another two. She's already got She went from

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Speaker 1: eighteen to three you don't think she'd get another two.

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Speaker 2: And I think it is pretty telling that they offered

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Speaker 2: the other sister first and didn't offer it to Ope.

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Speaker 2: So I think that shows who they kind of side

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Speaker 2: with a little bit more.

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Speaker 1: I'm glad you're on my side.

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Speaker 3: I well, I don't know if I.

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Speaker 1: Well, we disagree with you, Okay, no, we're going to

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Speaker 1: the next story.

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Speaker 2: I'm more on Op's side than the sister and the

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Speaker 2: family side. I just don't know if going low contact

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Speaker 2: is worth it, because it's like, the whole point was

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Speaker 2: it's like I want my kid to go up around

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Speaker 2: his grandfather. And now it's like your response is like, well,

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Speaker 2: I guess I'm going to completely like dissolve that plan

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Speaker 2: dissolving it.

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Speaker 1: It's the Colorado. They're moving to Colorado because the father

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Speaker 1: will't honor what her request. He did in the will.

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Speaker 1: We don't know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's I feel like that's the whole crux of

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Speaker 2: that story. My mom said my sister should have married

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Speaker 2: my husband. Now I think they're trying to sabotage my marriage.

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Speaker 1: Oh, you married the wrong one. You gotta go with

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Speaker 1: this one, you married the wrong sister. Brother.

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Speaker 2: I'm upset at my mom and my sister because of

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Speaker 2: something my mother said. But everyone around me feels like

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Speaker 2: I'm overreacting. Please be brutally honest in telling me if

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Speaker 2: I'm being insecure or if my mom and my husband

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Speaker 2: are wrong in this.

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Speaker 1: You got it.

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Speaker 2: Let me give you a little bit of backstory. My husband,

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Speaker 2: James thirty four male, and I twenty nine female, were

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Speaker 2: neighbors growing up. My sister, fran thirty four female, was

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Speaker 2: in the same grade. Was in the same grade as

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Speaker 2: my husband. Growing up, everyone knew my sister in school

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Speaker 2: because she is very smart and beautiful. And by the way,

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Speaker 2: this comes from user tell Mom's sister thirty four thirty

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Speaker 2: two forty two on the Okay story Time Subredda. James

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Speaker 2: had a huge crush on her, and all of us

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Speaker 2: knew about it. He asked her out for senior prom

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Speaker 2: and Franz shot him down in front of the entire school.

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Speaker 2: They still remained friends, but he moved to a different

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Speaker 2: state for college and we didn't hear much from him

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Speaker 2: except to see him when he came back for holidays.

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Speaker 2: James and I were never friends growing up, since I

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Speaker 2: was in middle school when this happened. In fact, I

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Speaker 2: was much younger than both of them, and they would

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Speaker 2: actively avoid me or involving me in their hangouts and activities.

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Speaker 2: I went to a good college and got my first

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Speaker 2: job in the same city as Jane. My mom suggested

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Speaker 2: that I should contact James since I didn't know anyone there.

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Speaker 2: We became friends, and then three years later we got married.

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Speaker 2: We both have high paying jobs and love our life.

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Speaker 2: We moved back to our hometown during COVID as James's

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Speaker 2: mom had health issues and our jobs allowed us to

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Speaker 2: work remotely. Fran also had a pretty good life. She

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Speaker 2: married when she was twenty three and her husband was

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Speaker 2: pretty well off. Two years ago, Fran discovered that he

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Speaker 2: was cheating on her for almost the entire duration of

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Speaker 2: their marriage with multiple partners, and she decided to break

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Speaker 2: things off. Fran moved back with my mom and Fran

299
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Speaker 2: had not worked for the entire duration of their marriage

300
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Speaker 2: and was expecting to gain significant alimony from the divorce. However,

301
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Speaker 2: due to complications regarding the prenup, she barely got anything

302
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Speaker 2: and is struggling financially.

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Speaker 1: She got a.

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Speaker 2: Job, but is barely able to afford her own place

305
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Speaker 2: and continues living with my mom. James and I were

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Speaker 2: very supportive of her during the entire process. Since James

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Speaker 2: and Fran were friends growing up, they both have a

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Speaker 2: special bond. They've had their inside jokes and stories, and

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Speaker 2: sometimes I do feel like a third wheel when we're

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Speaker 2: all together. Ew However, James keeps his distance and has

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Speaker 2: never given me any reason to believe that he has

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Speaker 2: lingering feelings for Fran, on the other hand, constantly visits

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Speaker 2: us like two or three times a week and ends

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Speaker 2: up staying for dinner and sleeping in our guest room.

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Speaker 2: I don't mind her coming over, but I don't like

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Speaker 2: the fact that she talks more to James than with me. Also,

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Speaker 2: she always comes over when I'm not at home, and

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Speaker 2: I often find them sitting next to each other on

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Speaker 2: the sofa watching TV when I get home. It sort

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Speaker 2: of reminds me of my childhood, where I was locked

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Speaker 2: out of our basement when Fran had friends over and

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Speaker 2: I would feel left out. Fran is also too comfortable

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Speaker 2: around James and walks around.

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Speaker 1: The house in just a towel after her.

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Speaker 2: Shower when James is around, or sleeps in her underwear

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Speaker 2: in the guest room without locking the door. I have

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Speaker 2: voiced my concerns to her, but she says that we

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Speaker 2: are a family and she does not care. I've also

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Speaker 2: voiced my concerns to James, and he does make efforts

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Speaker 2: now to explain stories and inside jokes if Fran makes them.

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Speaker 1: The main issue happened this weekend.

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Speaker 2: I was hanging out with my mom and Fran last

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Speaker 2: weekend and Fran was recollecting stories about how James would

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Speaker 2: do her homework and do chores for her growing up.

335
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Speaker 2: She said he was so in love with me, and

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Speaker 2: I felt guilty taking advantage of him. My mom jokingly

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Speaker 2: said to her that I wish you had the wits

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Speaker 2: to marry James then your loser husband, and you would

339
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Speaker 2: have not been in this situation. Fran smiled after hearing

340
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Speaker 2: that and nodded, but I was hurt by that comment.

341
00:15:56,720 --> 00:15:59,800
Speaker 2: I protested to my mom that James is my husband

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Speaker 2: and I don't want her to make those kind of

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Speaker 2: comments about him. My mom doubled down and said that

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Speaker 2: she feels like it's fine because both James and I

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00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:11,200
Speaker 2: are high earners while Fran is struggling financially. She kept

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Speaker 2: on saying that it was just hypothetical and that she

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Speaker 2: wants both of her daughters to be happy.

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Speaker 1: I did not like.

349
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Speaker 2: Those comments and told them to not speak like that

350
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Speaker 2: about James and my marriage in general.

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Speaker 1: Fran chimed in and.

352
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Speaker 2: Told me that I should not take the comments so

353
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Speaker 2: personally and I'm being too sensitive. However, I had a

354
00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:29,680
Speaker 2: fight with both of them about it and then I left.

355
00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:32,080
Speaker 2: So when I got home and told James, he also

356
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,760
Speaker 2: sided with my mom and Fran and told me that

357
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Speaker 2: her mom was just making a harmless joke. I also

358
00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:40,640
Speaker 2: raised the issue of Fran's behavior around the house, and

359
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:42,360
Speaker 2: he told me that this is between me and my

360
00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:44,960
Speaker 2: sister and he's not going to tell Fran what she

361
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:48,600
Speaker 2: can or cannot wear in the house. However, I just

362
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:51,800
Speaker 2: feel really bad because of this situation, and despite everyone

363
00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:54,400
Speaker 2: apologizing to me, things just don't feel right.

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Speaker 1: Am I wrong here in reacting the way I did?

365
00:16:56,720 --> 00:16:58,840
Speaker 2: Or does everyone else have a point and I should

366
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Speaker 2: just be more secure about my relationship with Jane.

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Speaker 1: Thank you everyone for all your support.

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Speaker 2: On my previous post to summarize what happened, my mom

369
00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:08,159
Speaker 2: made a really off putting comment that she wished my

370
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Speaker 2: sister Fran was married to my husband James. I got

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Speaker 2: really mad, and my husband also tried to undermine my

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Speaker 2: feelings and told me I was overreacting to a harmless joke.

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Speaker 1: Sorry for the.

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Speaker 2: Long post, but a lot of you were messaging me

375
00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:21,000
Speaker 2: for the update and wanted me to tell you what happened.

376
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:24,560
Speaker 2: The comments made me very paranoid, and I did see

377
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Speaker 2: everyone's point that James may have just married me because

378
00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:30,520
Speaker 2: of his crush on Fran. This really shot up my

379
00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:35,080
Speaker 2: anxiety and I started snooping around. My husband literally makes

380
00:17:35,119 --> 00:17:37,520
Speaker 2: me check his phone for new messages when he is

381
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,680
Speaker 2: not around, so I knew there was nothing to hide there. However,

382
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:43,640
Speaker 2: I was spooked by how my sister always knows when

383
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:46,000
Speaker 2: I'm not at home and why James and Fran are

384
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:48,160
Speaker 2: always sitting on the same couch when I come home.

385
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:50,760
Speaker 2: I tried talking to my husband and he told me

386
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Speaker 2: that my feelings were valid. However, he also said that

387
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:56,840
Speaker 2: Fran is going through a tough time and refused to

388
00:17:56,880 --> 00:18:00,520
Speaker 2: say anything bad about my mom and Fran. Last time Friday,

389
00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:03,360
Speaker 2: I went to the gym as usual in the evening,

390
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:05,399
Speaker 2: and when I came home, Fran was sitting in the

391
00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:07,439
Speaker 2: living room while James was cooking dinner.

392
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Speaker 1: I got a bit.

393
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:11,359
Speaker 2: Angry and asked her what is she doing here. She

394
00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:13,199
Speaker 2: said she had no plans for the night and she

395
00:18:13,240 --> 00:18:13,600
Speaker 2: came to.

396
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Speaker 1: Hang out with us.

397
00:18:14,400 --> 00:18:16,719
Speaker 2: It really annoyed me, and I told her that I

398
00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:19,959
Speaker 2: wanted to spend a quiet weekend with my husband and

399
00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:22,160
Speaker 2: if she can come some other time. She could see

400
00:18:22,160 --> 00:18:24,360
Speaker 2: that I was upset, and she started saying how our

401
00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:26,600
Speaker 2: mom was just being silly and I need to let

402
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:29,320
Speaker 2: it go since it was just a joke. I told

403
00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:32,320
Speaker 2: her I did not find it funny, and then we

404
00:18:32,359 --> 00:18:33,160
Speaker 2: got into a fight.

405
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:35,080
Speaker 1: She said that I am always.

406
00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:39,159
Speaker 2: An insecure, annoying kid, and no wonder no one liked me.

407
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:43,080
Speaker 2: It really hurt me, but James stepped in and told

408
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:46,080
Speaker 2: Fran that she needs to leave. I have never seen

409
00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:49,359
Speaker 2: James be so forceful with Fran. Fran muttered some unpleasant

410
00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:51,720
Speaker 2: things to James and then left. I was in tears

411
00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:53,679
Speaker 2: by the end of the whole thing, and James was

412
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:56,600
Speaker 2: consoling me. I was really upset and spent the night

413
00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:59,879
Speaker 2: in our room alone. In the morning, I prepared no

414
00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:02,720
Speaker 2: votes on all of the things that I wanted to ask. James,

415
00:19:03,040 --> 00:19:05,479
Speaker 2: your comments really helped me get my thoughts straight. I

416
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:08,320
Speaker 2: know I was being very insecure, but after reading the comments,

417
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:11,080
Speaker 2: I really started questioning if James really married me for

418
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:14,160
Speaker 2: me or just because I was Fran's sister and look

419
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:18,000
Speaker 2: like her. People called me dollar store Fran in high school.

420
00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:21,560
Speaker 2: H James and I had a long conversation and I

421
00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:23,480
Speaker 2: told him my anxieties and insecurities.

422
00:19:23,680 --> 00:19:24,880
Speaker 1: I told him how it makes.

423
00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:27,000
Speaker 2: Me feel that he spends so much time with Fran

424
00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:29,160
Speaker 2: when she visits us and they have their own little

425
00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:32,240
Speaker 2: inside jokes. I asked him if he still has feelings

426
00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:34,920
Speaker 2: for her. He was calm and smiling the whole time,

427
00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:36,879
Speaker 2: and he told me that he would tell me the truth,

428
00:19:37,040 --> 00:19:38,879
Speaker 2: but doesn't want me to hate him for it. Later,

429
00:19:39,119 --> 00:19:41,560
Speaker 2: he said that he knows Fran used him all through

430
00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:44,280
Speaker 2: their school days because she knew he liked her. When

431
00:19:44,280 --> 00:19:46,280
Speaker 2: he went to college, Franz still tried to keep in

432
00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:49,000
Speaker 2: touch with him, but putting distance between them made him

433
00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:51,840
Speaker 2: realize how badly she treated him, and he decided to

434
00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:54,160
Speaker 2: just cut contact with her so that he can work

435
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:57,200
Speaker 2: on himself. That was the reason he rarely visited us

436
00:19:57,359 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 2: when he used to come for holidays and stopped being

437
00:20:00,119 --> 00:20:02,040
Speaker 2: friends with Fran. I told him that it bothered me

438
00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:04,760
Speaker 2: that he chose Fran before me and ignored me during

439
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:07,800
Speaker 2: our childhood. That was the reason I always had that

440
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:10,040
Speaker 2: doubt if I was his second choice.

441
00:20:10,119 --> 00:20:11,880
Speaker 1: He said that I was thirteen.

442
00:20:11,520 --> 00:20:13,439
Speaker 2: When he went to college, and if he would have

443
00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:16,040
Speaker 2: liked me instead of Fran at that age, we would

444
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,560
Speaker 2: have been having a different problem.

445
00:20:17,920 --> 00:20:20,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's right, you can't be doing that.

446
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:23,440
Speaker 2: He told me that when I contacted him, he thought

447
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:25,479
Speaker 2: that I must be like Fran and was not very

448
00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:28,359
Speaker 2: enthusiastic to meet me. However, after we hung out a

449
00:20:28,359 --> 00:20:30,879
Speaker 2: few times, he realized that I'm nothing like Fran and

450
00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:32,359
Speaker 2: we soon became close.

451
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:34,840
Speaker 1: Then we started dating and we got married after a

452
00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:35,399
Speaker 1: few years.

453
00:20:35,480 --> 00:20:37,480
Speaker 2: He told me that Fran was married by then and

454
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,000
Speaker 2: he saw that I always put Fran on the pedestal

455
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:43,119
Speaker 2: and would get jealous when Fran posted vacation pictures of

456
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,720
Speaker 2: the new, shiny things her husband bought for That was

457
00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:48,119
Speaker 2: the reason he never told me that he doesn't like

458
00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:51,240
Speaker 2: hanging around Fran, as he feels that for me, Fran

459
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:54,240
Speaker 2: was always the north star. He told me that he

460
00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:57,000
Speaker 2: had always kept his distance from Fran and she was

461
00:20:57,040 --> 00:20:59,359
Speaker 2: a non issue since we would only meet her a

462
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,800
Speaker 2: few times a year. However, after her divorce, he didn't

463
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:04,960
Speaker 2: know how to act. He said that he was grateful

464
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,159
Speaker 2: to me for uprooting our lives and moving back to

465
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:10,119
Speaker 2: our hometown for his mom's health. He wanted to do

466
00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:12,640
Speaker 2: the same and take care of my family. When Fran

467
00:21:12,760 --> 00:21:15,239
Speaker 2: got divorced, he supported her in every way that he

468
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:18,919
Speaker 2: could for me, even though he realized it meant spending

469
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:21,040
Speaker 2: a lot of time with her and listening to her

470
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:23,119
Speaker 2: bring up all of the memories from high school that

471
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:25,879
Speaker 2: he wants to forget. I told him it bothered me

472
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,320
Speaker 2: that Fran came to our house as often as she does,

473
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:30,960
Speaker 2: and generally in the evenings when I go to the gym.

474
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:33,040
Speaker 2: He told me that he also finds it odd that

475
00:21:33,080 --> 00:21:36,120
Speaker 2: she knows my gym routine and always comes on evenings

476
00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:38,679
Speaker 2: when I'm not at home. However, he told me that

477
00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:41,719
Speaker 2: he has always kept his distance from her, and if

478
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:44,200
Speaker 2: she did anything that would raise an alarm, he would

479
00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:47,239
Speaker 2: have told me immediately. She just makes him watch all

480
00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:49,880
Speaker 2: the old movies or TV shows that they watched growing

481
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:53,040
Speaker 2: up and gossips endlessly about their old high school friends.

482
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:54,840
Speaker 2: He told me, I need to trust him, and if

483
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:56,560
Speaker 2: I want him to be the bad guy and ask

484
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:58,879
Speaker 2: Fran to not visit us often that he could do

485
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:02,120
Speaker 2: that for me. He knows that I will eventually make

486
00:22:02,200 --> 00:22:05,040
Speaker 2: up with my mom and Fran and does not want

487
00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:07,879
Speaker 2: them to blame him for being mean to Fran. He

488
00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:09,639
Speaker 2: told me that he will not tell Fran what to

489
00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:12,320
Speaker 2: wear around the house, as it would be creepy if

490
00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:14,359
Speaker 2: it came from him. I felt that I got all

491
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,720
Speaker 2: the assurance I needed from James, and I will never

492
00:22:16,840 --> 00:22:19,520
Speaker 2: doubt how amazing of a husband he has been, and

493
00:22:19,640 --> 00:22:22,280
Speaker 2: will never doubt how amazing you are when you join

494
00:22:22,359 --> 00:22:25,320
Speaker 2: us live on YouTube every weekday at three pm PST.

495
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:28,360
Speaker 2: Just at our profile and you know, let's discuss where

496
00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:28,640
Speaker 2: we're at.

497
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:30,760
Speaker 1: We got a little bit left. Keep this short, but

498
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:32,840
Speaker 1: it was nice because you helped out with the mom.

499
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:34,840
Speaker 1: He's like, oh, of course, I'll help out with the sister,

500
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 1: not understanding your complex history with the sister. Yeah.

501
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:41,240
Speaker 2: He wasn't tapped into the dynamic that Op had with

502
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:43,400
Speaker 2: her sister. Yeah, and he assumed that he was doing

503
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:46,160
Speaker 2: something that would make him look better in Op's eyes, Yeah,

504
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,280
Speaker 2: when really she was just like stopping out with the

505
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:50,880
Speaker 2: sister that I don't even like. Also, the north Star

506
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,280
Speaker 2: comment threw me off a little bit. Yeah, that threw

507
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:54,919
Speaker 2: me off too. I don't know if that was just

508
00:22:55,119 --> 00:22:57,800
Speaker 2: raised funny. I think he was saying that he thought

509
00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:00,640
Speaker 2: that op looked up to her sister.

510
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:03,480
Speaker 1: Got it, and like, so since Opie so that he

511
00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:05,359
Speaker 1: thought that OPI looked up to his sister, he thought

512
00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:08,080
Speaker 1: that in her vulnerable time, he should have been consoling her.

513
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:11,639
Speaker 1: I don't really like that. I understand that OPI and

514
00:23:11,680 --> 00:23:14,840
Speaker 1: the sister were high school friends. I just think, well,

515
00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:17,320
Speaker 1: the sister should have she did in a sneaky kind

516
00:23:17,320 --> 00:23:19,120
Speaker 1: of way. She could have done it in a more

517
00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:21,720
Speaker 1: kind of like not sneaky way. What do you mean,

518
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:24,879
Speaker 1: like like, oh, you're gone to the gym, I'll just

519
00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:26,919
Speaker 1: go hang out with your host. No yeah, yeah no.

520
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:31,400
Speaker 2: The the timing and even like James, like the husband

521
00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:33,560
Speaker 2: is like, yeah, I thought it was. It's kind of

522
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:35,720
Speaker 2: weird too that she keeps coming over when you're not here.

523
00:23:35,880 --> 00:23:37,680
Speaker 2: But I do believe. I believe him when he says

524
00:23:37,720 --> 00:23:41,080
Speaker 2: it's like if she ever tried anything weird, like I

525
00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 2: would have let you know.

526
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:43,160
Speaker 1: I'd let you know immediately.

527
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:45,320
Speaker 2: And the sister was definitely the way that he also

528
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:48,280
Speaker 2: like like kicked her out that, you know, after she

529
00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:50,280
Speaker 2: kind of crossed the line. Like, I think it's very

530
00:23:50,280 --> 00:23:52,600
Speaker 2: clear based on you know, he could have had her

531
00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:54,720
Speaker 2: back more when like the joke was made.

532
00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:56,639
Speaker 1: I just don't think he had full context because he

533
00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:58,840
Speaker 1: thought Op looked up to his sister.

534
00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:02,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, he still wasn't down. Yeah, he's just so like

535
00:24:02,800 --> 00:24:05,679
Speaker 2: not interested in Fran at all. Thank God that he's like,

536
00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:07,760
Speaker 2: we don't even need to care about that joke because

537
00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:09,280
Speaker 2: it's such a joke.

538
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:12,040
Speaker 1: Would there's no universe where I'd be with that woman.

539
00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:15,000
Speaker 1: I would go, Dude, I wish we had wonder woman's

540
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 1: last soo of truth. I would wrap that around your

541
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:21,199
Speaker 1: sister's around your sister's neck and be like, do you

542
00:24:21,240 --> 00:24:23,879
Speaker 1: want to my husband, That's what I would do. Do

543
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:26,200
Speaker 1: you want to? And she'd be like yes, and God,

544
00:24:26,920 --> 00:24:27,679
Speaker 1: that's what I would do.

545
00:24:27,760 --> 00:24:29,639
Speaker 2: And then and then you could use that lass of

546
00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:33,840
Speaker 2: truth send her to the greatest truth of all the grave.

547
00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:36,000
Speaker 1: That's what I would do with I was a sister. Yeah,

548
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,159
Speaker 1: maybe Op should find it and wrap it around and

549
00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:40,879
Speaker 1: her like wrist and ask her yeah maybe yeah, maybe

550
00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:44,800
Speaker 1: maybe just not go the full blown you know, we're out.

551
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:46,800
Speaker 1: I would dude, I would be so livid, Like God,

552
00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:50,280
Speaker 1: that's what I would do. So let's let's finish this off.

553
00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:53,320
Speaker 2: My mom and Fran visited us on Sunday, and my

554
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:55,720
Speaker 2: mom profusely apologized to me.

555
00:24:55,960 --> 00:24:57,680
Speaker 1: Let's go w Mom.

556
00:24:58,119 --> 00:24:59,800
Speaker 2: She told me that she doesn't want me to feel

557
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:02,320
Speaker 2: bad for her comment and she would never wish anything

558
00:25:02,359 --> 00:25:04,840
Speaker 2: bad on my marriage. She meant to say that James

559
00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:07,560
Speaker 2: was a great guy and she hopes Fran can find

560
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:10,040
Speaker 2: someone like him one day. Fran was a bit sour

561
00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:12,639
Speaker 2: but apologize to us for all of the name calling

562
00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:15,840
Speaker 2: on Friday and told us that it's just her hormones.

563
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:17,840
Speaker 2: She said that she likes hanging out with her sister

564
00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:20,359
Speaker 2: and her best friend and hence comes to our house.

565
00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:22,679
Speaker 2: I told her that she's welcome to come anytime that

566
00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:24,840
Speaker 2: she wants, but to call ahead of time in case

567
00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:27,600
Speaker 2: James and I have plans for the evening, and she agreed.

568
00:25:27,880 --> 00:25:30,439
Speaker 2: I really want to move past this issue, but I

569
00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:32,840
Speaker 2: do want to put some firm boundaries on when Fran

570
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:34,960
Speaker 2: can come over to our house and hang out with

571
00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:36,560
Speaker 2: James alone, as I know that.

572
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:37,560
Speaker 1: This bothers him too.

573
00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:40,160
Speaker 2: Overall, I feel like things are good now and I'm

574
00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,840
Speaker 2: glad that my worst fears did not come true, but

575
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:44,800
Speaker 2: I do feel I need some therapy.

576
00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:46,520
Speaker 1: In order to deal with my insecurities.

577
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:50,440
Speaker 4: I like this update. This was a great ending. Perfect

578
00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:53,879
Speaker 4: I love this. Seldom do we find a perfect ending

579
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:56,240
Speaker 4: to a story. Yeah, but I feel like this has

580
00:25:56,359 --> 00:25:58,480
Speaker 4: ended in the most perfect way it could have.

581
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:01,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, husband's on your side. Mom apologized, sister could have

582
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:05,480
Speaker 1: been better. Sister is clearly not going to steal your husband. Yeah,

583
00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:07,320
Speaker 1: clearly not going to steal. And it also shows she's

584
00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:09,919
Speaker 1: still kind of like the villain and the story. She's like, sorry,

585
00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:10,760
Speaker 1: my hormones.

586
00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:12,680
Speaker 2: Like, yeah, if anyone to keep an eye on her,

587
00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:14,720
Speaker 2: your sister needs some growing to do.

588
00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:18,359
Speaker 1: Yeah. Overall, and you're taking care of yourself. You see

589
00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 1: this psychological damage that your upbringing has given you, and

590
00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:24,040
Speaker 1: you're like, I need to change that too. I love this.

591
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:31,320
Speaker 1: I love this. That's a ten out of ten. Nice job, Op.

592
00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:34,160
Speaker 2: I hope everything's going just wonderful for you right now

593
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:35,400
Speaker 2: and your cool husband James.

594
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:37,880
Speaker 1: This is probably my favorite story of the month. Hey,

595
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:38,240
Speaker 1: it's Sam.

596
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:39,920
Speaker 2: We're gonna get back to the stories, but here's three

597
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:41,600
Speaker 2: minutes of bads from her sponsors.

598
00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:44,560
Speaker 3: I told my parents not to include my stepdaughter in

599
00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:47,680
Speaker 3: their will. My husband's furious with me, but he did

600
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:51,320
Speaker 3: the same thing. Hypocrit I thirty five female, have two

601
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:56,680
Speaker 3: kids seventeen. They're male and female twins, and one stepdaughter eighteen,

602
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,520
Speaker 3: who I met when she was eleven. The other day,

603
00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:02,000
Speaker 3: I was at my parents' house going over some estate

604
00:27:02,040 --> 00:27:05,680
Speaker 3: planning as I am the executor. While reviewing, I saw

605
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:08,560
Speaker 3: my folks had split their assets to be half for

606
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:12,439
Speaker 3: my two siblings and I and the other half for

607
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:17,520
Speaker 3: their grandkids, all to be distributed evenly. My stepdaughter was included.

608
00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 3: When I asked them about this, they said they wanted

609
00:27:20,359 --> 00:27:23,840
Speaker 3: to be fair. Their estate isn't super large, but the

610
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:27,480
Speaker 3: sum would be substantial. Think new car. By the way,

611
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:30,960
Speaker 3: this comes from U slash Conscious Tension four nine to

612
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,200
Speaker 3: one on the r slash Okay story Time to Sepreddit.

613
00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:36,159
Speaker 3: I told my parents that, while generous of them, I

614
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:38,840
Speaker 3: didn't think it would be necessary and would be better

615
00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:41,920
Speaker 3: to split between their five grandkids. That's very generous, ever,

616
00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:44,399
Speaker 3: that's nice. When we got home, my husband said he

617
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 3: overheard what I said and that I was being an

618
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:51,800
Speaker 3: a hole for alienating his daughter. I told him My

619
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:56,679
Speaker 3: reasoning was because she is the only child, grandchild, niece

620
00:27:57,000 --> 00:28:00,600
Speaker 3: on both her parents' sides, and that she would set

621
00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:05,000
Speaker 3: her grandparents own multiple properties. Her uncles are fairly well

622
00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:10,080
Speaker 3: off and live in a hcol area, And well, she's

623
00:28:10,119 --> 00:28:12,720
Speaker 3: the only kid, and it's not looking like, at least

624
00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:16,240
Speaker 3: in his side, that she'll have any cousins. Plus their

625
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:20,359
Speaker 3: collective net worth is substantially more than my side. I

626
00:28:20,480 --> 00:28:23,320
Speaker 3: also asked him if his parents included my kids in

627
00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:28,320
Speaker 3: their estate, but he refused to answer. Suspicious still, he

628
00:28:28,359 --> 00:28:30,439
Speaker 3: said I was being an a hole and accused me

629
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:33,280
Speaker 3: of not caring about her future. I think I was

630
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:35,480
Speaker 3: doing the right thing by looking out for my kids

631
00:28:35,480 --> 00:28:37,800
Speaker 3: and their cousins. Am I the a hole?

632
00:28:38,080 --> 00:28:39,480
Speaker 1: How old's daughter? The stepdaughter?

633
00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 3: Stepdaughter is eighteen. There's still more to read? But what

634
00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:43,680
Speaker 3: do we think so far?

635
00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:45,560
Speaker 1: I say you are the a hole?

636
00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:48,320
Speaker 3: Edit. I was told to include this in the post.

637
00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:52,080
Speaker 3: Number one. I didn't argue with or pressure my parents

638
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,680
Speaker 3: to make a change. I simply mentioned that I didn't

639
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:57,800
Speaker 3: feel it was necessary for her to receive a monetary amount.

640
00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:01,400
Speaker 3: Number two my mom on giving her a set of

641
00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 3: family heirloom jewelry that is her birthstone. I think this

642
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:07,640
Speaker 3: is quite thoughtful. I am not a big jewelry person,

643
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:09,880
Speaker 3: and she has other sets for the other girls in

644
00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 3: the family, so I feel this is okay.

645
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:13,520
Speaker 1: Trying to dig theirselves out a hole here.

646
00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:17,239
Speaker 3: Number three. My parents have seen her about three to

647
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:20,400
Speaker 3: five times a year since I met her. Number four,

648
00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:24,440
Speaker 3: my nephews and my kids do not have active relationships

649
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:27,760
Speaker 3: with their biological father's sides. My niece is a new

650
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:31,720
Speaker 3: mom and works at a restaurant. I feel that financial

651
00:29:31,760 --> 00:29:35,320
Speaker 3: inheritance would be more impactful for them, even as such

652
00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:38,760
Speaker 3: a small amount. Number five. I know my stepdaughter is

653
00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:41,920
Speaker 3: set to inherit at least two houses in a major

654
00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:46,280
Speaker 3: US city with hcool. I found this out a while

655
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:49,280
Speaker 3: back after my husband asked me to help them organize

656
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:51,840
Speaker 3: his office. I had to read through papers to know

657
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:54,520
Speaker 3: how to file them accordingly. The paper was a certified

658
00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 3: copy and was drafted soon after we were married. My

659
00:29:57,920 --> 00:30:01,400
Speaker 3: kids were not included. I am not sure if it

660
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:04,480
Speaker 3: has been updated. I did not ask him about it

661
00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:06,920
Speaker 3: at the time because I did not have an issue

662
00:30:06,920 --> 00:30:10,760
Speaker 3: with it. Number six. There is a distance in the relationship,

663
00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:13,600
Speaker 3: but I don't feel it's my fault. I can explain this.

664
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:16,120
Speaker 3: When I met her mom for the first time, she

665
00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:19,920
Speaker 3: made it very clear that I wasn't her mom. I

666
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,360
Speaker 3: didn't see this as an issue because I didn't want

667
00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:25,560
Speaker 3: to overstep as a mom myself, and I could see

668
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 3: where she was coming from and respected her request. But

669
00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:32,680
Speaker 3: as time progressed, our opportunity to spend time together became

670
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:37,680
Speaker 3: less frequent. At first, my husband had every other weekend visitation.

671
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:41,960
Speaker 3: It became less frequent as she became a teenager because

672
00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:44,600
Speaker 3: she wanted to spend the night with friends and hang out, etc.

673
00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:48,800
Speaker 3: Which I see as normal teenager behavior. The other piece

674
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:51,040
Speaker 3: is that we were never invited to be included in

675
00:30:51,080 --> 00:30:54,760
Speaker 3: major celebrations for her. We usually celebrated birthdays with her

676
00:30:54,840 --> 00:30:59,160
Speaker 3: a week after because we weren't invited. My husband was

677
00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:03,000
Speaker 3: just not us. So she's also never spent Thanksgiving or

678
00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:07,120
Speaker 3: Christmas with us because her mom wanted those days again,

679
00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 3: which I saw was fine because that's her only child.

680
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:14,800
Speaker 3: My husband would spend holidays with her at her mom's house,

681
00:31:15,080 --> 00:31:18,000
Speaker 3: which I encourage because I knew the importance of father

682
00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:20,840
Speaker 3: daughter connections. We also were not invited to her high

683
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:24,800
Speaker 3: school graduation. I think she's a beautiful and brilliant young woman,

684
00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:27,840
Speaker 3: and I care for her tremendously, but it's challenging to

685
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:31,680
Speaker 3: develop deep, meaningful relationships with people you have little contact with,

686
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:34,480
Speaker 3: and for people putting me in the category of the

687
00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:39,200
Speaker 3: evil stepmother saying that I see her as other, don't

688
00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:42,160
Speaker 3: think that I haven't been trying since the beginning. I

689
00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:44,800
Speaker 3: include her in every way I can in the times

690
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:48,000
Speaker 3: that she is with us, by doing things like teaching

691
00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:51,760
Speaker 3: her family recipes, taking her shopping for clothes so that

692
00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:54,720
Speaker 3: she doesn't have to bring things back and forth, and

693
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,680
Speaker 3: attending every school athletic event that I could. I have

694
00:31:58,800 --> 00:32:02,000
Speaker 3: tried to include her in my family vacation planning, but

695
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 3: was told by her mother that unless the vacation occurred

696
00:32:05,360 --> 00:32:07,520
Speaker 3: on a weekend we're scheduled to have time with her,

697
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,000
Speaker 3: then she would not allow us to have the time.

698
00:32:11,040 --> 00:32:13,920
Speaker 3: This limited our options to local weekend trips, but even

699
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:16,920
Speaker 3: then her mom comes up with some reason she can't join,

700
00:32:17,360 --> 00:32:21,479
Speaker 3: including surprise trips to another state. I even suggested a

701
00:32:21,480 --> 00:32:24,479
Speaker 3: family cruise in lieu of a honeymoon to celebrate our

702
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:28,000
Speaker 3: new family, but was blocked by her mom. My husband

703
00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 3: is allowed to take her on extended vacations. As long

704
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 3: as it's just the two of them. Okay, there's still more,

705
00:32:34,120 --> 00:32:37,040
Speaker 3: but it's kind of sounding like it's the mom that

706
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,760
Speaker 3: has the issue now, not the girl. So before I

707
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:42,000
Speaker 3: was thinking it's the eighteen year old like not wanting

708
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:45,760
Speaker 3: anything to do with her stepmom, but sounds pretty clearly

709
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:49,320
Speaker 3: like the original mom. She's gone the shots. She wants

710
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:53,080
Speaker 3: to take control of the situation. She does not want

711
00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:54,880
Speaker 3: the stepmom involved at all.

712
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:58,560
Speaker 1: Yikes, because when did they get together? Hold was a stepdaughter?

713
00:32:58,640 --> 00:33:02,400
Speaker 3: Do you think eleven years? Those are some pretty formative

714
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:04,520
Speaker 3: years in your life that you're with them, And I

715
00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:08,160
Speaker 3: think that that's okay to have that connection. I feel like,

716
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:11,960
Speaker 3: especially if this stepmom has been trying like so hard

717
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:14,720
Speaker 3: to like make an effort and to be there for

718
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:17,360
Speaker 3: this stepdaughter and to be as much of a good

719
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:20,000
Speaker 3: mom as she can, then like, I think there's just

720
00:33:20,080 --> 00:33:22,720
Speaker 3: really no problem. I've tried to be flexible in accommodations

721
00:33:22,720 --> 00:33:25,760
Speaker 3: around holidays by postponing things like Christmas Morning so that

722
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:29,280
Speaker 3: she can be included. This created frustration in my kids

723
00:33:29,280 --> 00:33:31,120
Speaker 3: because they felt like they shouldn't have to put their

724
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:34,520
Speaker 3: lives aside to accommodate for her. One year when the

725
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:37,640
Speaker 3: holiday occurred on one of our planned weekends, I came

726
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:40,920
Speaker 3: up with a suggestion of celebrating Christmas on Christmas Eve

727
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:44,400
Speaker 3: so we could do the full family thing. My kids

728
00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:48,480
Speaker 3: weren't thrilled, but they understood. In the end, we didn't

729
00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:50,960
Speaker 3: end up spending any time with her, as her mom

730
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,520
Speaker 3: told us that she planned on having a dinner party

731
00:33:53,560 --> 00:33:57,120
Speaker 3: on Christmas Eve and needed my stepdaughter to help her prepare.

732
00:33:57,480 --> 00:34:01,560
Speaker 3: That seems like a BS excuse. That's crazy.

733
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:03,320
Speaker 1: This is really frustrating.

734
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:06,720
Speaker 3: When the time came for college applications, I was ecstatic

735
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:09,759
Speaker 3: to be asked by my stepdaughter to help her with

736
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:12,799
Speaker 3: the applications, but soon after it was told that her

737
00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:16,160
Speaker 3: mom hired a professional to help her get into her

738
00:34:16,320 --> 00:34:19,600
Speaker 3: top choice of school, and I was no longer needed.

739
00:34:19,719 --> 00:34:23,360
Speaker 1: It's nice. It just seems every time you try to

740
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 1: step in to be any sort of mother figure for

741
00:34:26,760 --> 00:34:28,400
Speaker 1: this child, the mom.

742
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:31,600
Speaker 3: Is like, Nope, get out of there. Can't be having

743
00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:35,480
Speaker 3: that exactly, that's not fun because especially like if this

744
00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:40,200
Speaker 3: stepdaughter was excited to tell the stepmom about this, Like

745
00:34:40,239 --> 00:34:43,000
Speaker 3: the stepdaughter seems like she really wants to have that relationship,

746
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:46,120
Speaker 3: but her og mom isn't having it at all. I

747
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:51,839
Speaker 3: wonder if anything similar happened in like the OG parents relationship,

748
00:34:52,360 --> 00:34:54,120
Speaker 3: you know, Like, I wonder if any of this has

749
00:34:54,239 --> 00:34:57,200
Speaker 3: something to do with why they got divorced in the

750
00:34:57,200 --> 00:34:59,520
Speaker 3: first place, if she's like controlling or something like that.

751
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:01,920
Speaker 3: I have tried to have a bond with her with

752
00:35:02,040 --> 00:35:05,280
Speaker 3: the little time that I have. I have consistently brought

753
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:07,520
Speaker 3: up to my husband that I feel like we needed

754
00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:10,719
Speaker 3: more time with her to help build a relationship, at

755
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:15,040
Speaker 3: the very least by him maintaining his every other weekend schedule.

756
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:17,880
Speaker 3: He has told me that ultimately, her mom is her mom,

757
00:35:18,040 --> 00:35:20,839
Speaker 3: and she determines her schedule and how she spends her time.

758
00:35:21,040 --> 00:35:23,560
Speaker 3: He has also expressed that he fears that if he

759
00:35:23,719 --> 00:35:27,400
Speaker 3: undermines her mom, then he might lose the time in

760
00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:30,279
Speaker 3: relationship that he does have with her, and I do

761
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,080
Speaker 3: not want to be the reason for any sort of

762
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:35,759
Speaker 3: break in their relationship. His time and relationship with her

763
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:38,719
Speaker 3: hasn't changed, so maybe he doesn't see the need for

764
00:35:38,800 --> 00:35:41,239
Speaker 3: me and my kids to be involved. But if he

765
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:44,160
Speaker 3: doesn't advocate for us, then what am I supposed to do?

766
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:49,040
Speaker 3: There is another update that was posted the next day

767
00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:51,839
Speaker 3: after that one. What are we thinking what is she

768
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:52,520
Speaker 3: supposed to do?

769
00:35:53,040 --> 00:35:57,120
Speaker 1: Well, she can't do anything. This isn't her will, and

770
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,000
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, like, is she getting this money right now?

771
00:35:59,040 --> 00:36:01,239
Speaker 1: But like the grandparents have a died, so she's not

772
00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,600
Speaker 1: getting anything right now. If I was the grandparents and

773
00:36:03,640 --> 00:36:06,439
Speaker 1: I felt this way, and I felt every single thing

774
00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:10,120
Speaker 1: Opie was feeling, I would be like, Okay, she's eighteen now,

775
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 1: she can now make her decisions. She is being influenced

776
00:36:13,120 --> 00:36:15,600
Speaker 1: by a parent, but she has decisions to see her

777
00:36:15,719 --> 00:36:19,360
Speaker 1: dad and to see her family now. If she seems

778
00:36:19,360 --> 00:36:22,760
Speaker 1: like she's more leaning towards the family, I would consider

779
00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:26,080
Speaker 1: giving her a part of the will, But I understand

780
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:27,960
Speaker 1: that it's not really been her choice this whole time.

781
00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:30,400
Speaker 1: And if she decides to like stay on the mom's

782
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:31,960
Speaker 1: side and not like really be a part of this

783
00:36:31,960 --> 00:36:34,040
Speaker 1: family just visit here and there, I don't know if

784
00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 1: I would like give her that much.

785
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:37,520
Speaker 3: What do you think she's supposed to do about like

786
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:40,880
Speaker 3: just them spending time with the stepdaughter at all. It

787
00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:44,960
Speaker 3: seems like the og mom really just isn't wanting any

788
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,120
Speaker 3: of that to happen. I think the dad is worried

789
00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:47,759
Speaker 3: about that too.

790
00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:51,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's tricky because I'm afraid the mom doesn't want

791
00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:52,959
Speaker 1: to be replaced as a mom.

792
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:55,239
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think so, but I mean she knows that

793
00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:56,239
Speaker 3: she won't be I.

794
00:36:56,120 --> 00:36:59,520
Speaker 1: Want to know who divorced to in the divorce and why.

795
00:36:59,880 --> 00:37:02,040
Speaker 1: I feel like that would give more context of like

796
00:37:02,160 --> 00:37:04,120
Speaker 1: the dad was a bad dad or the mom was

797
00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:05,880
Speaker 1: a bad mom, because it seems like just from this

798
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:08,600
Speaker 1: one perspective, the mom is a bad mom. She's very controlling,

799
00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:09,799
Speaker 1: and this is what's going on.

800
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:12,719
Speaker 3: Then it's interesting though, because it seems like they just

801
00:37:12,719 --> 00:37:15,120
Speaker 3: get her on the weekends every other weekend, so it

802
00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:18,360
Speaker 3: seems like the mom has some majority custody, which is interesting.

803
00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:21,080
Speaker 3: That's just a really tough situation, and it does because

804
00:37:21,080 --> 00:37:23,960
Speaker 3: Opie really is not in a position of power in this.

805
00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:27,280
Speaker 3: But there is an update that was made the next day,

806
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:31,640
Speaker 3: so let's see major update. I haven't had the opportunity

807
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:33,600
Speaker 3: to have a discussion with my husband about all this,

808
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:35,719
Speaker 3: as I was waiting to speak with my therapist to

809
00:37:35,719 --> 00:37:39,480
Speaker 3: get advice on the best way to approach the conversation. However,

810
00:37:39,840 --> 00:37:41,840
Speaker 3: I did receive a phone call this morning from my

811
00:37:41,960 --> 00:37:44,760
Speaker 3: father in law, who I see as an absolute angel

812
00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:49,160
Speaker 3: of a man. Apparently my husband told his mom about

813
00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:52,759
Speaker 3: our arrangement, and my mother in law went off, and

814
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,719
Speaker 3: this is how my father in law found out about it.

815
00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 3: The father in law asked me what my side of

816
00:37:58,239 --> 00:38:01,359
Speaker 3: the story was, and I very am emotionally told him

817
00:38:01,440 --> 00:38:04,480
Speaker 3: everything as I listed in the op. I told him

818
00:38:04,480 --> 00:38:08,440
Speaker 3: it was not my intention to alienate the stepdaughter in

819
00:38:08,520 --> 00:38:12,160
Speaker 3: any way, and that this whole thing has created a nightmare.

820
00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:15,560
Speaker 3: After a deep breath and a slight pause, my father

821
00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:19,440
Speaker 3: in law said, I did the right thing. A few

822
00:38:19,520 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 3: years ago, my father in law suffered a series of strokes.

823
00:38:22,920 --> 00:38:25,600
Speaker 3: He said that this has prompted him to want to

824
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:29,680
Speaker 3: reevaluate the estate to make sure that everything was in order.

825
00:38:30,239 --> 00:38:33,480
Speaker 3: He is quite old, close to ninety, and has a

826
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:36,440
Speaker 3: lot of underlying health issues. He and my mother in

827
00:38:36,520 --> 00:38:39,400
Speaker 3: law share all of their assets, and she is also

828
00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:44,080
Speaker 3: in his poa in case anything happens, and because they

829
00:38:44,120 --> 00:38:46,680
Speaker 3: have a family trust, he wanted to include her and

830
00:38:46,760 --> 00:38:50,319
Speaker 3: his son in this discussion. He told me that he

831
00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:52,680
Speaker 3: brought up that he wanted to include my children in

832
00:38:52,719 --> 00:38:56,000
Speaker 3: the family trust. He told me he proposed to allow

833
00:38:56,080 --> 00:38:58,920
Speaker 3: for ten percent of the trust's liquid assets to be

834
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:01,200
Speaker 3: split between my two two kids to help get a

835
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:04,040
Speaker 3: start on life. That's so nice. He then said that

836
00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:07,319
Speaker 3: my mother in law pushed back very hard, saying that

837
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:10,480
Speaker 3: because my children were not biologically related to their family,

838
00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:14,840
Speaker 3: then they should not be considered. When he asked my

839
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:17,680
Speaker 3: husband his thoughts on it, my father in law said

840
00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:20,120
Speaker 3: my husband's response was that it would be best to

841
00:39:20,280 --> 00:39:23,600
Speaker 3: keep it in family, but that he would consider including

842
00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:27,440
Speaker 3: us in his portion upon his passing if he and

843
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:29,680
Speaker 3: I were still together. The father in law said that

844
00:39:29,719 --> 00:39:31,719
Speaker 3: this was a surprise because at that point we were

845
00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:35,320
Speaker 3: still basically in newlyweds and was surprised a new husband

846
00:39:35,400 --> 00:39:38,320
Speaker 3: would even think that way. My mother in law's response

847
00:39:38,360 --> 00:39:42,120
Speaker 3: to that was unhappy, saying again we weren't blood and

848
00:39:42,120 --> 00:39:44,640
Speaker 3: that this was a family issue. Because of the stress

849
00:39:44,680 --> 00:39:48,000
Speaker 3: caused by the situation, and because of the recent strokes,

850
00:39:48,080 --> 00:39:50,759
Speaker 3: father in law did not want to press things any further. Yeah,

851
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:54,440
Speaker 3: that's probably the safest thing for whom father in law said. Afterwards,

852
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:57,239
Speaker 3: he pulled my husband aside to find out more about

853
00:39:57,280 --> 00:39:59,839
Speaker 3: what he had meant and to be assured that Mike

854
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:02,960
Speaker 3: kids would be included, and was basically told by my

855
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:06,280
Speaker 3: husband he would do what was best for his family,

856
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:09,879
Speaker 3: and the conversation dropped. Now. The father in law said

857
00:40:09,880 --> 00:40:12,520
Speaker 3: that he didn't push any further at this point because

858
00:40:12,560 --> 00:40:15,439
Speaker 3: he was getting tired from the conversation, but in light

859
00:40:15,480 --> 00:40:17,839
Speaker 3: of what was happening and how my mother in law

860
00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:20,960
Speaker 3: and husband are responding behind closed doors, he felt it

861
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:23,239
Speaker 3: was necessary to let me know. I'm so glad that

862
00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:26,000
Speaker 3: the father in law is like n Op's corner. It's

863
00:40:26,040 --> 00:40:30,200
Speaker 3: so like relieving to have someone else like that. He

864
00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:33,080
Speaker 3: said that the stepdaughter is set to be more than

865
00:40:33,120 --> 00:40:36,040
Speaker 3: okay when it comes time, and that my husband has

866
00:40:36,120 --> 00:40:39,160
Speaker 3: asked to tap into funds to pay for her college

867
00:40:39,239 --> 00:40:41,800
Speaker 3: so she would not need to take out any loans,

868
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:45,720
Speaker 3: which he agreed to. He said he asked my husband

869
00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:48,040
Speaker 3: if he would do the same for my kids, and

870
00:40:48,080 --> 00:40:51,239
Speaker 3: that my husband's response was that he would ask when

871
00:40:51,280 --> 00:40:54,240
Speaker 3: the time came, as my kids did not know yet

872
00:40:54,640 --> 00:41:00,200
Speaker 3: what was going to happen regarding college missions. Interesting. Interesting,

873
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:04,719
Speaker 3: he's just being like way more protective and like hesitant

874
00:41:04,840 --> 00:41:09,440
Speaker 3: when it comes to his stepkids. Crazy crazy father in

875
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:12,279
Speaker 3: law asked me if my husband and I had this conversation.

876
00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:15,319
Speaker 3: I told them that my husband and I discussions about

877
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:17,560
Speaker 3: my kids' school was that they would need to take

878
00:41:17,560 --> 00:41:20,680
Speaker 3: out loans finish college, and then we would help pay

879
00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:25,440
Speaker 3: off half the loans together once they graduated. My husband

880
00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:29,959
Speaker 3: has never suggested that anything for my kids college would

881
00:41:29,960 --> 00:41:33,279
Speaker 3: be paid for through his family trust. My father in

882
00:41:33,360 --> 00:41:35,680
Speaker 3: law was very apologetic.

883
00:41:35,320 --> 00:41:37,400
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, dude, because she has.

884
00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:41,000
Speaker 3: Two stepkids, right, yeah, so it's like only one out

885
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:43,640
Speaker 3: of three of the kids is being cared for, saying

886
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:46,400
Speaker 3: he should have pushed further as he loves us greatly

887
00:41:46,719 --> 00:41:49,879
Speaker 3: and feels like he did not do enough. I told

888
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:52,280
Speaker 3: him it was not his fault and that he should

889
00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:54,520
Speaker 3: not feel responsible for any of this, and that I

890
00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:56,919
Speaker 3: did not want him to feel obligated to make any

891
00:41:57,040 --> 00:41:59,200
Speaker 3: changes or bring it up with the mother in law

892
00:41:59,320 --> 00:42:02,560
Speaker 3: and husband, because I knew it would create additional stress

893
00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:04,680
Speaker 3: for him, and I wanted him to take care of

894
00:42:04,719 --> 00:42:08,480
Speaker 3: his peace. I just love their dynamics so much. I

895
00:42:08,520 --> 00:42:12,560
Speaker 3: love these two favorite characters. He said, though his desire

896
00:42:12,600 --> 00:42:14,799
Speaker 3: would be to do so, that since his wife and

897
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:17,400
Speaker 3: he have a joint in estate and that she is

898
00:42:17,480 --> 00:42:20,480
Speaker 3: power of attorney, that he felt like it would be

899
00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:24,040
Speaker 3: more trouble than it's worth. He is blind and has

900
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:26,880
Speaker 3: a lot of mobility issues, so anything he does, he

901
00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:29,960
Speaker 3: is dependent on her. He also said that based on

902
00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:32,799
Speaker 3: what he's heard on his side, he felt if he

903
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:35,640
Speaker 3: did update his will, then they would likely contest it,

904
00:42:35,760 --> 00:42:38,840
Speaker 3: which would create a financial burden on my end, and

905
00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:41,640
Speaker 3: he didn't want to create a negative situation. I told

906
00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:44,160
Speaker 3: him again that it was okay and that we would

907
00:42:44,160 --> 00:42:46,680
Speaker 3: be okay in life, and that he is not responsible

908
00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:50,800
Speaker 3: for anything that happened. I told him that my intention

909
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:53,359
Speaker 3: wasn't to be added to the trust, just to make

910
00:42:53,400 --> 00:42:55,640
Speaker 3: a point to my husband, to which he said he

911
00:42:55,719 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 3: understood and agreed. He apologized again. We told each other

912
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:02,440
Speaker 3: how much we loved one another, and he ended the

913
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:06,279
Speaker 3: call saying he considered me a person of integrity, which

914
00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:07,600
Speaker 3: is a rare gem.

915
00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:11,200
Speaker 1: Wow. And that's so tough that he can't do anything

916
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:13,239
Speaker 1: because people will be like, oh, he's olden, senile. He

917
00:43:13,520 --> 00:43:15,360
Speaker 1: doesn't mean it exactly.

918
00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:17,759
Speaker 3: But you know how you can be a rare Gems

919
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:21,319
Speaker 3: by joining us live on YouTube every weekday at three

920
00:43:21,360 --> 00:43:24,160
Speaker 3: pm PSD. Just tap our profile. That's all it takes.

921
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:27,640
Speaker 3: Now that I have this information, I feel like this

922
00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:31,520
Speaker 3: whole situation brought to light a lot of things I

923
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:36,800
Speaker 3: hadn't considered regarding my marriage. Also, writing out everything regarding

924
00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:40,520
Speaker 3: how my husband navigated his relationship with his daughter slash

925
00:43:40,560 --> 00:43:43,719
Speaker 3: ex wife really put things into perspective that makes me

926
00:43:43,760 --> 00:43:47,000
Speaker 3: feel like we were never a priority to him. I'm

927
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:49,279
Speaker 3: not sure where to go from here. I plan to

928
00:43:49,320 --> 00:43:52,120
Speaker 3: bring all this up with my therapist and talk it

929
00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:54,600
Speaker 3: out to figure out what I should do. But I

930
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:56,880
Speaker 3: no longer feel like the a hole for advocating for

931
00:43:57,000 --> 00:44:00,640
Speaker 3: my biological family because my husband and his side have

932
00:44:00,680 --> 00:44:04,879
Speaker 3: been advocating for theirs. Father in law excluded and that

933
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:07,640
Speaker 3: is the end of the story. But that's a good point.

934
00:44:08,000 --> 00:44:11,000
Speaker 3: That's interesting to me that because that reminds me again

935
00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:15,880
Speaker 3: of in the beginning when they were all like, hey,

936
00:44:16,360 --> 00:44:21,000
Speaker 3: why are you not wanting to like include the stepdaughter

937
00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:25,080
Speaker 3: in their will? Like, wasn't it a big issue? It

938
00:44:25,160 --> 00:44:27,279
Speaker 3: was like a little sketchy to them, and we were

939
00:44:27,400 --> 00:44:28,839
Speaker 3: called her the a whole at.

940
00:44:28,760 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 1: The beginning, But after getting all this context, yeah.

941
00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:34,080
Speaker 3: I don't think it is at all, because I mean,

942
00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:37,879
Speaker 3: apparently blood family is the most important here, and the.

943
00:44:37,840 --> 00:44:39,680
Speaker 1: Father in law would do something about it and would

944
00:44:39,760 --> 00:44:42,600
Speaker 1: change it. It just would bring rain and fire to

945
00:44:42,840 --> 00:44:44,040
Speaker 1: your children.

946
00:44:44,239 --> 00:44:47,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, so I think, like, if the father in law

947
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:49,960
Speaker 3: never actually changes it, then like, ope, he should keep

948
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:52,399
Speaker 3: it that way where the stepdaughter doesn't get anything from

949
00:44:52,400 --> 00:44:54,680
Speaker 3: her parents. But if the father in law is able

950
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:56,800
Speaker 3: to change it, then like sure, I don't know. I

951
00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:59,520
Speaker 3: think it would be a very polite thing to do

952
00:44:59,760 --> 00:45:03,719
Speaker 3: to like, well, even if you guys aren't gonna include us,

953
00:45:03,840 --> 00:45:05,719
Speaker 3: we're gonna include you, you know. I think that's a

954
00:45:05,760 --> 00:45:08,279
Speaker 3: very polite thing to do. However, it does make it

955
00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:11,000
Speaker 3: more difficult when her side of the family really doesn't

956
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:13,799
Speaker 3: have as much as the other side.

957
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:16,200
Speaker 1: I just found out my mom stole three hundred dollars

958
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:19,920
Speaker 1: worth of my wedding gifts five years later. Oh boy,

959
00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:25,680
Speaker 1: hey everyone, longtime Alurker, first time poster. So I hope

960
00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:28,640
Speaker 1: this flow's all right. So, like my title says, I

961
00:45:28,719 --> 00:45:31,440
Speaker 1: just found out my mom may have stolen three hundred

962
00:45:31,440 --> 00:45:34,799
Speaker 1: dollars worth of presents from me. A little background. My

963
00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:39,239
Speaker 1: grandmother lives in another state. She's a literal saint and

964
00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:42,360
Speaker 1: she gives that expecting anything back, and is really a

965
00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:45,440
Speaker 1: person you need to protect at all costs because of

966
00:45:45,520 --> 00:45:49,439
Speaker 1: how sweet she is. Her and my grandfather were the

967
00:45:49,480 --> 00:45:52,319
Speaker 1: only people who sent us money for our wedding. We

968
00:45:52,400 --> 00:45:55,120
Speaker 1: didn't expect anyone to help pay for it. By the way,

969
00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:58,280
Speaker 1: this comes from sweaty letter on the arsash Okay storytime separated,

970
00:45:58,480 --> 00:46:01,400
Speaker 1: so he wanted to pay for our wedding, so no

971
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 1: one could have a say because unfortunately, my husband and

972
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:09,000
Speaker 1: I both have very controlling needs to the main character mom's,

973
00:46:09,280 --> 00:46:11,719
Speaker 1: and she wasn't sure if she was going to be

974
00:46:11,800 --> 00:46:14,279
Speaker 1: able to make it to my bridle shower. We'll come

975
00:46:14,360 --> 00:46:17,120
Speaker 1: back to that in a moment. But she was able

976
00:46:17,160 --> 00:46:20,640
Speaker 1: to and got me this beautiful dish set that was

977
00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:24,480
Speaker 1: exactly what I wanted. This morning, I got a text,

978
00:46:24,840 --> 00:46:27,480
Speaker 1: good morning, I'd like to talk to you soon, please,

979
00:46:27,880 --> 00:46:29,879
Speaker 1: and I let her know. Of course I'd love to talk.

980
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:33,400
Speaker 1: I always loved talking to her, but something fell off.

981
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:36,680
Speaker 1: She calls me about two hours ago and starts talking

982
00:46:36,680 --> 00:46:39,600
Speaker 1: about how long my husband and I have been married.

983
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:42,960
Speaker 1: We are about to celebrate our five years. Congrats, and

984
00:46:43,040 --> 00:46:46,319
Speaker 1: she says, speaking of five years ago, your grandfather and

985
00:46:46,320 --> 00:46:49,400
Speaker 1: I came to see everyone after Christmas, and you and

986
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:52,200
Speaker 1: your hubby weren't able to make it. So I had

987
00:46:52,239 --> 00:46:55,279
Speaker 1: given your mom a bunch of gifts for you, and

988
00:46:55,719 --> 00:46:59,400
Speaker 1: so let her know this was for your bridle shower,

989
00:46:59,560 --> 00:47:01,800
Speaker 1: since I wasn't sure if I was going to be

990
00:47:01,840 --> 00:47:04,440
Speaker 1: able to make it. I honestly did make it to

991
00:47:04,560 --> 00:47:07,200
Speaker 1: your bridle shower, and you got the dish set you wanted.

992
00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:10,040
Speaker 1: Well about six months to a year ago, when I

993
00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:12,440
Speaker 1: was up visiting you and was talking with you and

994
00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:15,160
Speaker 1: your mom, I asked you did you get all those

995
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:18,719
Speaker 1: gifts I got you? And you said, what gifts? And

996
00:47:18,760 --> 00:47:22,480
Speaker 1: your mom said, I'll tell you about it later. And

997
00:47:22,560 --> 00:47:26,960
Speaker 1: now I'm pissed off, wondering if you've even gotten any

998
00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:31,000
Speaker 1: of it. WHOA, The mom put a little.

999
00:47:32,600 --> 00:47:36,560
Speaker 3: Right, she said, we have gifts at home. And then

1000
00:47:36,719 --> 00:47:39,920
Speaker 3: it's like when your mom says that you can have

1001
00:47:40,040 --> 00:47:43,520
Speaker 3: McDonald's on the way back from wherever you're going, and

1002
00:47:43,560 --> 00:47:45,839
Speaker 3: then you are on your way back and then you

1003
00:47:45,880 --> 00:47:49,720
Speaker 3: see her just slowly drive past McDonald's, like weave a second,

1004
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:52,880
Speaker 3: but did she say, and then you don't get McDonald's that.

1005
00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:55,160
Speaker 1: Day, Or if your grandparents give you like some money

1006
00:47:55,200 --> 00:47:56,960
Speaker 1: in a gift card and then she takes it and

1007
00:47:57,040 --> 00:47:59,319
Speaker 1: puts it in your savings account, Yeah, it feels like that.

1008
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:01,799
Speaker 1: It's like I could like buy one hundred dollars worth

1009
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:05,200
Speaker 1: of play blades, Mom, but you won't let me please Mom.

1010
00:48:05,520 --> 00:48:08,000
Speaker 1: No On pissed once I found out it's like three

1011
00:48:08,080 --> 00:48:09,600
Speaker 1: hundred dollars worth of stuff.

1012
00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:10,480
Speaker 3: That's a lot.

1013
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:14,280
Speaker 1: It's been five years ago, so how can I really

1014
00:48:14,360 --> 00:48:17,560
Speaker 1: tell what is from her or not showed me? She

1015
00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:20,239
Speaker 1: had a list and the brand. I let her know

1016
00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:24,040
Speaker 1: i'd go home and look through my kitchen stuff. When

1017
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:28,160
Speaker 1: she says the most heartbreaking thing, I'll never expect to

1018
00:48:28,200 --> 00:48:31,560
Speaker 1: thank you for anything I do. And I knew you

1019
00:48:31,600 --> 00:48:34,240
Speaker 1: were going to do a lot with planning your wedding

1020
00:48:34,600 --> 00:48:36,600
Speaker 1: and all that stuff. But when I didn't get a

1021
00:48:36,680 --> 00:48:39,240
Speaker 1: thank you, I was surprised, and that's why I asked

1022
00:48:39,719 --> 00:48:41,840
Speaker 1: she was looking for a thank you the grandmother.

1023
00:48:42,080 --> 00:48:43,800
Speaker 3: The grandma was looking for a thank you.

1024
00:48:43,719 --> 00:48:45,200
Speaker 1: Thank you for all the gifts that she gave her.

1025
00:48:45,239 --> 00:48:47,480
Speaker 3: So the grandma was looking for a thank you and

1026
00:48:47,760 --> 00:48:49,600
Speaker 3: didn't get one, but wasn't gonna.

1027
00:48:49,360 --> 00:48:51,680
Speaker 1: Like ask, like, oh, you're super busy, understand.

1028
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:54,960
Speaker 3: Five years later she brings it up. Turns out that

1029
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:57,880
Speaker 3: hope he didn't even get the gifts in the first place.

1030
00:48:58,480 --> 00:49:01,160
Speaker 1: I told her that if I've never thank you to

1031
00:49:01,239 --> 00:49:03,720
Speaker 1: a gift, she's given me. Then I am truly sorry

1032
00:49:03,719 --> 00:49:06,280
Speaker 1: because she helped me out so much in my life

1033
00:49:06,520 --> 00:49:10,160
Speaker 1: and I'm truly grateful for her. She told me, talking

1034
00:49:10,200 --> 00:49:13,439
Speaker 1: to you makes everything better. And we told each other

1035
00:49:13,480 --> 00:49:15,440
Speaker 1: we love you and miss you, and that was the

1036
00:49:15,560 --> 00:49:17,719
Speaker 1: end of the conversation. Got a little bit and then

1037
00:49:17,760 --> 00:49:20,040
Speaker 1: we got an update coming up. Oh my gosh. So

1038
00:49:20,080 --> 00:49:21,960
Speaker 1: now I have the list and I'm going to look

1039
00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:24,440
Speaker 1: at it at my home and all my stuff. But

1040
00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:26,719
Speaker 1: the advice I need is what should I do if

1041
00:49:26,800 --> 00:49:30,759
Speaker 1: I am missing things? Do I confront my mom? Or

1042
00:49:30,760 --> 00:49:32,799
Speaker 1: do I let my grandmother confront mom?

1043
00:49:33,120 --> 00:49:34,040
Speaker 3: So what's the list?

1044
00:49:34,120 --> 00:49:36,839
Speaker 1: The grandma gave all the things that grandma was giving

1045
00:49:36,880 --> 00:49:37,839
Speaker 1: to her, so all of.

1046
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:39,600
Speaker 3: These gifts were just Grandma's gifts.

1047
00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 1: The three hundred dollars stuff missing, she never got to

1048
00:49:42,680 --> 00:49:44,080
Speaker 1: thank you and was like, did you ever get it?

1049
00:49:44,120 --> 00:49:46,319
Speaker 3: I was thinking this was like multiple people's gifts. Well,

1050
00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:49,120
Speaker 3: good thing they've got like this list of seeing what

1051
00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:51,920
Speaker 3: they're missing, or like a receipt a gift receipt of

1052
00:49:52,280 --> 00:49:53,440
Speaker 3: just their actual gifts.

1053
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:56,040
Speaker 1: Should I let it go? Because it's been five years,

1054
00:49:56,280 --> 00:49:58,680
Speaker 1: I don't know what to do. Also, I wouldn't be

1055
00:49:58,719 --> 00:50:01,080
Speaker 1: surprised if my mom stole it, we gifted it or

1056
00:50:01,120 --> 00:50:04,120
Speaker 1: did something with it. My grandma sent my husband and

1057
00:50:04,200 --> 00:50:07,720
Speaker 1: I'm matching perfume and cologne, and my mom only gave

1058
00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:10,960
Speaker 1: me the colone and said she couldn't find the perfume.

1059
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:14,239
Speaker 1: Plus there's a lot more I could get into that

1060
00:50:14,280 --> 00:50:17,839
Speaker 1: would take a lot to post. And thank god, I've

1061
00:50:17,840 --> 00:50:20,720
Speaker 1: gone to therapy for my childhood, so she has history

1062
00:50:20,960 --> 00:50:22,000
Speaker 1: of doing stuff like this.

1063
00:50:22,280 --> 00:50:25,799
Speaker 3: So the mom just took the perfume and was just like, oh,

1064
00:50:25,840 --> 00:50:29,000
Speaker 3: I just can't find it. Oh, I just can't find

1065
00:50:29,040 --> 00:50:31,440
Speaker 3: it anyway, Sorry, where else would it be if you

1066
00:50:31,480 --> 00:50:33,560
Speaker 3: didn't touch it? Where else would it be if it

1067
00:50:33,600 --> 00:50:36,040
Speaker 3: wasn't in the box? On the mom?

1068
00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:38,640
Speaker 1: It was an update. Do you think the mom stolen? Absolutely,

1069
00:50:38,840 --> 00:50:41,759
Speaker 1: she's the prime suspect here, I suspect.

1070
00:50:42,400 --> 00:50:44,560
Speaker 3: Take her a jill, take her away.

1071
00:50:44,920 --> 00:50:47,600
Speaker 1: Hey everyone, I'm going to start by answering some questions

1072
00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:50,680
Speaker 1: and clearing up some things, and then I'll get into

1073
00:50:50,760 --> 00:50:52,880
Speaker 1: the update. A lot of people asked why my grandma

1074
00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:55,560
Speaker 1: didn't give them to me directly. She lives out of

1075
00:50:55,600 --> 00:50:57,960
Speaker 1: state and they were for my bridle shower and she

1076
00:50:58,120 --> 00:50:59,799
Speaker 1: wasn't sure if she was gonna be able to make

1077
00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:02,439
Speaker 1: it and gave them to my mom and to give

1078
00:51:02,640 --> 00:51:05,240
Speaker 1: to me as a surprise. Also, she's a literal saint,

1079
00:51:05,360 --> 00:51:08,680
Speaker 1: so like she's very considerate in all way, shapes and forms.

1080
00:51:08,840 --> 00:51:10,720
Speaker 3: We love and protect the Grandma.

1081
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:15,640
Speaker 1: That last part, but I thought, Grandma is not Mom's mom,

1082
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:18,440
Speaker 1: she's Grandma on my dad's side.

1083
00:51:18,760 --> 00:51:22,319
Speaker 3: Makes sense why the santity did not, you know, get

1084
00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:22,920
Speaker 3: passed on.

1085
00:51:23,320 --> 00:51:26,719
Speaker 1: Grandma bought this stuff five years ago, so she doesn't

1086
00:51:26,760 --> 00:51:31,400
Speaker 1: exactly remember everything and doesn't have the receipts. Also, a

1087
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:33,600
Speaker 1: lot of you asked if my mom has done shady

1088
00:51:33,640 --> 00:51:37,040
Speaker 1: stuff like this before. To my knowledge, she hasn't stolen

1089
00:51:37,080 --> 00:51:41,400
Speaker 1: anything before from me or from anyone for whom she

1090
00:51:41,400 --> 00:51:44,600
Speaker 1: could have kept. But she also could have had very

1091
00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:47,440
Speaker 1: well loss to do. A very disorganized.

1092
00:51:46,680 --> 00:51:48,359
Speaker 3: House seems a little fishy to me.

1093
00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:52,120
Speaker 1: I have a very interesting relationship with my mom. I

1094
00:51:52,200 --> 00:51:54,799
Speaker 1: don't really see her too much. I talk on the

1095
00:51:54,800 --> 00:51:57,000
Speaker 1: phone with her maybe once or twice a week now.

1096
00:51:57,040 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 1: Might take another post to get into all that the updates.

1097
00:52:01,600 --> 00:52:03,960
Speaker 1: So when I got home last night, I started going

1098
00:52:04,000 --> 00:52:07,160
Speaker 1: through my stuff and the list. I found about four

1099
00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:09,920
Speaker 1: to five gifts that were on the list, not all

1100
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:13,319
Speaker 1: equaling to the full three hundred dollars. Grandma was so

1101
00:52:13,360 --> 00:52:15,440
Speaker 1: happy to see at least got some of the gifts.

1102
00:52:15,920 --> 00:52:19,919
Speaker 1: She now will send anything directly to me. By the way,

1103
00:52:19,960 --> 00:52:22,920
Speaker 1: you can directly see us every weekday at three PMPST.

1104
00:52:23,160 --> 00:52:25,279
Speaker 1: Just tap a profile. I got a little bit more here.

1105
00:52:25,760 --> 00:52:28,640
Speaker 3: Any thoughts, I think we exactly know where that perfume is.

1106
00:52:28,840 --> 00:52:32,240
Speaker 3: I think it's interesting that they don't have a history

1107
00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:35,680
Speaker 3: of the mom like stealing things in the past. It's

1108
00:52:35,760 --> 00:52:39,200
Speaker 3: kind of interesting, like it seems like theyre is still

1109
00:52:39,480 --> 00:52:42,000
Speaker 3: history with her. It's still that stuff in the childhood

1110
00:52:42,040 --> 00:52:44,160
Speaker 3: that she had to work through in therapy, but none

1111
00:52:44,160 --> 00:52:46,960
Speaker 3: of it involved stealing, which is interesting to me.

1112
00:52:47,480 --> 00:52:48,239
Speaker 1: But I don't know.

1113
00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:49,359
Speaker 3: Let's finish it out.

1114
00:52:49,480 --> 00:52:51,520
Speaker 1: A lot of you want me to confront my mom,

1115
00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:55,320
Speaker 1: but I'm unfortunately not going to. Grandma doesn't want to

1116
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:58,520
Speaker 1: start any problems and just wants to keep the peace.

1117
00:52:59,040 --> 00:53:01,440
Speaker 1: I usually have no and calling my mom out on

1118
00:53:01,560 --> 00:53:04,719
Speaker 1: her bs and if this was just between her and

1119
00:53:04,760 --> 00:53:09,320
Speaker 1: I I would one percent press her, But since Grandma

1120
00:53:09,400 --> 00:53:12,319
Speaker 1: has asked me not to start any problems, I will

1121
00:53:12,360 --> 00:53:16,960
Speaker 1: respect her wishes. She truly is the sweetest lady and

1122
00:53:17,000 --> 00:53:18,040
Speaker 1: deserves the world.

1123
00:53:18,440 --> 00:53:22,440
Speaker 3: Ah, Grandma just doesn't want any problems and since and

1124
00:53:22,520 --> 00:53:26,200
Speaker 3: I think probably because of her involvement in it. Like

1125
00:53:26,280 --> 00:53:28,080
Speaker 3: I wonder if this was someone else, I wonder if

1126
00:53:28,080 --> 00:53:31,040
Speaker 3: the grandma would like care if they started, like got

1127
00:53:31,080 --> 00:53:33,839
Speaker 3: into it or not. But I think because the grandma,

1128
00:53:34,160 --> 00:53:36,720
Speaker 3: it was like the grandma's presence, she probably just doesn't

1129
00:53:36,719 --> 00:53:40,120
Speaker 3: want to be involved at all if something like went

1130
00:53:40,120 --> 00:53:42,959
Speaker 3: over to her, which makes sense, which makes sense.

1131
00:53:42,719 --> 00:53:45,560
Speaker 1: And my husband, I think either my mom kept them

1132
00:53:45,600 --> 00:53:48,400
Speaker 1: to a gift to other people or kept thing for herself.

1133
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:51,000
Speaker 1: My mom was the kind of mother who gets jealous

1134
00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:56,080
Speaker 1: of her daughters and wants to live vicariously through them. Sorry,

1135
00:53:56,120 --> 00:53:59,440
Speaker 1: if this wasn't some bad butt, I confronted my mom

1136
00:53:59,760 --> 00:54:03,960
Speaker 1: and justice update. I gotta respect grandma's wishes. Thank you

1137
00:54:04,040 --> 00:54:08,040
Speaker 1: for everyone who gave advice in sharing her stories. If

1138
00:54:08,080 --> 00:54:10,200
Speaker 1: you have any more questions, I can answer them in

1139
00:54:10,239 --> 00:54:12,720
Speaker 1: the comments edit the gifts I found, I do remember

1140
00:54:12,760 --> 00:54:15,000
Speaker 1: my mom giving them to me. I just don't remember

1141
00:54:15,080 --> 00:54:17,640
Speaker 1: if she said they were from my grandma and grandpa

1142
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:21,040
Speaker 1: and what they were for. I found maybe four maybe

1143
00:54:21,160 --> 00:54:25,120
Speaker 1: five out of the nineteen Grandma listed five out of

1144
00:54:25,160 --> 00:54:26,040
Speaker 1: the nineteen.

1145
00:54:26,600 --> 00:54:31,000
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, whoa wild What do you think should

1146
00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:31,399
Speaker 3: do with them?

1147
00:54:31,880 --> 00:54:34,000
Speaker 1: Dude? eBay, bro pawn shop.

1148
00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:36,640
Speaker 3: Ebe pawnshop, regifting.

1149
00:54:36,520 --> 00:54:39,000
Speaker 1: Or added them to her house hoarder collection.

1150
00:54:39,200 --> 00:54:42,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, keeping them for herself. Those are our options. That

1151
00:54:42,640 --> 00:54:45,520
Speaker 3: really does sting because her sweet little grandma. I would

1152
00:54:45,560 --> 00:54:48,359
Speaker 3: love to see my sweet little grandma got me. It's

1153
00:54:48,360 --> 00:54:51,680
Speaker 3: justly if it's a list of nineteen things, like, that's

1154
00:54:51,719 --> 00:54:55,640
Speaker 3: a lot. That's a lot of things. So that's just

1155
00:54:55,680 --> 00:54:58,719
Speaker 3: really like upsetting. I would be so disappointed, like if

1156
00:54:58,719 --> 00:55:02,400
Speaker 3: I was ope selfishly because I want that stuff, but

1157
00:55:02,440 --> 00:55:06,400
Speaker 3: also two because like disappointed that my grandma didn't get

1158
00:55:06,800 --> 00:55:09,360
Speaker 3: that joy that you get when you give someone something

1159
00:55:09,400 --> 00:55:11,400
Speaker 3: that they need or that they want. You know, she

1160
00:55:11,440 --> 00:55:13,319
Speaker 3: wants us to thank you, and she won't get that

1161
00:55:13,360 --> 00:55:15,160
Speaker 3: because people on eBay don't say thank you.

1162
00:55:16,400 --> 00:55:18,480
Speaker 1: Hey, it's sam. We get back to the stories. But

1163
00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:20,320
Speaker 1: here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1164
00:55:20,880 --> 00:55:24,760
Speaker 3: My brother's girlfriend doesn't respect our family and now she's

1165
00:55:24,920 --> 00:55:25,799
Speaker 3: living with us.

1166
00:55:26,600 --> 00:55:30,200
Speaker 1: Oh gosh, it's a little close to home, doesn't.

1167
00:55:29,880 --> 00:55:31,880
Speaker 3: It for context to My brother and I live with

1168
00:55:31,920 --> 00:55:35,240
Speaker 3: our parents. Seventy five female and seventy six male.

1169
00:55:35,239 --> 00:55:37,920
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, that's crazy.

1170
00:55:38,120 --> 00:55:41,280
Speaker 3: The whole family is in one house. We weren't financially

1171
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:43,520
Speaker 3: stable enough to live on our own as young adults,

1172
00:55:43,520 --> 00:55:46,560
Speaker 3: so we both stayed home as a Filipino household. This

1173
00:55:46,600 --> 00:55:49,320
Speaker 3: is pretty normal. I've been ready to leave for the

1174
00:55:49,400 --> 00:55:52,120
Speaker 3: past couple of years, but our parents have reached an

1175
00:55:52,160 --> 00:55:55,080
Speaker 3: age where they need help around the house. We pay

1176
00:55:55,120 --> 00:55:58,160
Speaker 3: the bills and do any heavy housework. By the way,

1177
00:55:58,239 --> 00:56:01,600
Speaker 3: this comes from you slash lost seventy one oh six

1178
00:56:01,719 --> 00:56:03,760
Speaker 3: on the r slash Okay storytime Supreddit.

1179
00:56:03,840 --> 00:56:05,040
Speaker 1: So it's not an American family.

1180
00:56:05,480 --> 00:56:08,319
Speaker 3: Not an American family? Well, I mean, yeah, we don't know.

1181
00:56:08,400 --> 00:56:11,239
Speaker 3: They might be in America, but it's just Filipino.

1182
00:56:11,320 --> 00:56:14,080
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, sorry. If I just heard that, I'd be like, Yo,

1183
00:56:14,200 --> 00:56:16,959
Speaker 1: something's not adding up here. Someone needs to move help.

1184
00:56:17,280 --> 00:56:19,680
Speaker 3: That's right, Yeah, me too. Our family lives in a

1185
00:56:19,719 --> 00:56:22,240
Speaker 3: small two and a half story house with a basement.

1186
00:56:22,480 --> 00:56:26,240
Speaker 3: It's a small house, two bedrooms, two bathrooms. My parents

1187
00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:29,680
Speaker 3: take up a bedroom each. My father has a lot

1188
00:56:29,719 --> 00:56:32,239
Speaker 3: of medical equipment and my mother prefers to have her

1189
00:56:32,280 --> 00:56:35,160
Speaker 3: own space. My brother has been in the basement and

1190
00:56:35,200 --> 00:56:37,680
Speaker 3: I have got a bed tucked away upstairs. It's a

1191
00:56:37,719 --> 00:56:42,880
Speaker 3: tight fit for four adults. Enter the girlfriend. It's twenty twenty,

1192
00:56:43,120 --> 00:56:47,080
Speaker 3: pre pandemic. My brother is seeing people again. Years after

1193
00:56:47,120 --> 00:56:49,680
Speaker 3: his breakup with his first girlfriend from high school. He

1194
00:56:49,800 --> 00:56:52,520
Speaker 3: had been bringing home girls late at night, and his

1195
00:56:52,640 --> 00:56:54,480
Speaker 3: current girlfriend was one of them.

1196
00:56:54,960 --> 00:56:57,520
Speaker 1: Ooh, and your parents let you get away with that.

1197
00:56:57,520 --> 00:56:58,560
Speaker 1: That's crazy, I guess.

1198
00:56:58,560 --> 00:57:01,920
Speaker 3: So at the beginning I was pretty neutral about her.

1199
00:57:02,280 --> 00:57:05,200
Speaker 3: My brother would come home late and she'd tag along

1200
00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:08,359
Speaker 3: and spend the night, no introduction, just walked in and

1201
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:11,120
Speaker 3: went straight to the basement with my brother. Cool a

1202
00:57:11,200 --> 00:57:16,400
Speaker 3: situationship whatever. Right then the pandemic started. We didn't see

1203
00:57:16,440 --> 00:57:19,880
Speaker 3: her for a while, but then she caught COVID. This

1204
00:57:20,000 --> 00:57:22,720
Speaker 3: is about when I stopped feeling neutral about her. Instead

1205
00:57:22,760 --> 00:57:26,080
Speaker 3: of isolating at home, she came to our house.

1206
00:57:26,560 --> 00:57:28,960
Speaker 1: You can come when you don't have COVID, but when

1207
00:57:29,040 --> 00:57:30,200
Speaker 1: you have it you can't.

1208
00:57:30,920 --> 00:57:34,840
Speaker 3: Obviously, with elderly parents, this was not okay. My brother

1209
00:57:34,960 --> 00:57:37,360
Speaker 3: was forced to get her hotel room while she recovered

1210
00:57:37,360 --> 00:57:41,560
Speaker 3: from COVID. After recovering, she started coming over for days

1211
00:57:41,600 --> 00:57:45,200
Speaker 3: at a time. I would start seeing her eat meals

1212
00:57:45,240 --> 00:57:48,680
Speaker 3: in our dining table, meal prepping in our kitchen, her

1213
00:57:48,760 --> 00:57:51,880
Speaker 3: leftovers would be in our fridge, her laundry hanging in

1214
00:57:51,920 --> 00:57:55,360
Speaker 3: our basement. All of this would be fine if she

1215
00:57:55,520 --> 00:57:59,320
Speaker 3: was a contributing member of the household, except she isn't.

1216
00:57:59,720 --> 00:58:01,920
Speaker 3: When she's in the kitchen or dining room, she's in

1217
00:58:01,960 --> 00:58:04,200
Speaker 3: there by herself because no one wants to spend time

1218
00:58:04,240 --> 00:58:06,840
Speaker 3: with her like that. I don't know about you, guys,

1219
00:58:07,080 --> 00:58:10,240
Speaker 3: but the kitchen and dining room i e. Cooking and

1220
00:58:10,240 --> 00:58:14,000
Speaker 3: sharing food are very intimate family thanks. And it's not

1221
00:58:14,120 --> 00:58:17,760
Speaker 3: just taking up space. She also leaves stuff everywhere, dirty

1222
00:58:17,760 --> 00:58:21,000
Speaker 3: dishes in the sink in the basement, hair collecting on

1223
00:58:21,040 --> 00:58:25,160
Speaker 3: the shower wall, her makeup caking the shower curtain slowly

1224
00:58:25,240 --> 00:58:29,080
Speaker 3: over time. How does that happen? How much makeup you

1225
00:58:29,160 --> 00:58:31,600
Speaker 3: gotta be wearing for it to be on the shower curtain.

1226
00:58:31,720 --> 00:58:34,880
Speaker 3: The wet floor after she's showered, so wet that the

1227
00:58:34,920 --> 00:58:39,120
Speaker 3: floor towel is always soaked through. Her cheap clothes thrown

1228
00:58:39,200 --> 00:58:42,680
Speaker 3: about in our entryway. I tried talking to my parents

1229
00:58:42,680 --> 00:58:45,760
Speaker 3: about what the heck is happening? Why is this person

1230
00:58:45,800 --> 00:58:49,200
Speaker 3: staying in our house? Why aren't we saying anything? Why

1231
00:58:49,240 --> 00:58:52,120
Speaker 3: are we finding ourselves cleaning up after her? These are

1232
00:58:52,160 --> 00:58:56,120
Speaker 3: all very good questions. Ope, nothing was gained from this conversation,

1233
00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:59,640
Speaker 3: but I did confirm that neither my brother nor her

1234
00:59:00,080 --> 00:59:03,360
Speaker 3: have bothered to discuss with them about staying in our home.

1235
00:59:03,480 --> 00:59:07,320
Speaker 3: Fast forward to twenty twenty four today, I've felt no

1236
00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:10,080
Speaker 3: peace in my home since she started squatting in it.

1237
00:59:10,280 --> 00:59:15,000
Speaker 3: I genuinely hate this person. I hate that I spend

1238
00:59:15,000 --> 00:59:18,280
Speaker 3: my weekend sleeping in only to wake up to the

1239
00:59:18,320 --> 00:59:21,600
Speaker 3: smell of her food cooking in the kitchen. I literally

1240
00:59:21,800 --> 00:59:24,400
Speaker 3: just waited two hours for her to finish cooking lunch

1241
00:59:24,600 --> 00:59:27,760
Speaker 3: so I could get access to the kitchen appliances. I

1242
00:59:27,840 --> 00:59:30,800
Speaker 3: forgot to mention that she only cooks for herself and my.

1243
00:59:30,840 --> 00:59:33,400
Speaker 1: Brother takes care of her and her own.

1244
00:59:33,800 --> 00:59:38,160
Speaker 3: While using others' stuff. Since she's come here, she's continued

1245
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:41,040
Speaker 3: to overstep her stay by inviting friends over late at

1246
00:59:41,120 --> 00:59:45,080
Speaker 3: night to pregame. She's also straight up baby sut few

1247
00:59:45,120 --> 00:59:48,640
Speaker 3: kids in our house. You can't imagine the surprise of

1248
00:59:48,640 --> 00:59:52,080
Speaker 3: my parents when they see these random kids. They don't

1249
00:59:52,120 --> 00:59:54,560
Speaker 3: have the heart to turn the kids away at this point,

1250
00:59:54,640 --> 00:59:57,760
Speaker 3: they've already been dropped off. Mind you, She's not much

1251
00:59:57,760 --> 01:00:00,240
Speaker 3: of a babysitter either. She just props the ca in

1252
01:00:00,240 --> 01:00:01,960
Speaker 3: front of a tablet and tells them to be quiet

1253
01:00:01,960 --> 01:00:05,360
Speaker 3: when they're making a fuss. I've tried the empathy route.

1254
01:00:05,560 --> 01:00:09,160
Speaker 3: Her parents weren't together. She's the middle child or in

1255
01:00:09,200 --> 01:00:13,040
Speaker 3: the younger half of several siblings, all girls. I don't

1256
01:00:13,080 --> 01:00:15,680
Speaker 3: even think her mom was in the picture much either,

1257
01:00:15,960 --> 01:00:19,200
Speaker 3: mostly raised by her grandmother. From what I understand, most

1258
01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:22,439
Speaker 3: of her siblings still live with the grandmother. She's too

1259
01:00:22,720 --> 01:00:26,000
Speaker 3: scared to take public transit or to try and get

1260
01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:29,920
Speaker 3: her driver's license. Currently, she's a part time server at

1261
01:00:29,960 --> 01:00:32,440
Speaker 3: a bar slash restaurant, not making much.

1262
01:00:32,560 --> 01:00:36,400
Speaker 1: Oh, well, she just tried babysitting more, I guess so.

1263
01:00:36,880 --> 01:00:39,720
Speaker 3: After two years of sharing home with her mainly bathroom

1264
01:00:39,760 --> 01:00:42,439
Speaker 3: and kitchen, it's clear that no one raised her right

1265
01:00:42,560 --> 01:00:45,920
Speaker 3: and she experienced a lot of neglect at best. She's

1266
01:00:45,960 --> 01:00:49,240
Speaker 3: so traumatized by her upbringing. She's just an empty shell

1267
01:00:49,280 --> 01:00:52,560
Speaker 3: of a person that needs love and care. My family

1268
01:00:52,680 --> 01:00:55,680
Speaker 3: is not a recovery home, especially when all this girl

1269
01:00:55,760 --> 01:00:58,120
Speaker 3: does is take up space and rot in the basement.

1270
01:00:58,480 --> 01:01:02,000
Speaker 3: Sometimes she comes to family parties and she'll be smiley

1271
01:01:02,080 --> 01:01:05,000
Speaker 3: and make nice, but that's not the real herb. She

1272
01:01:05,240 --> 01:01:09,840
Speaker 3: lies constantly about small things, and when she gets caught

1273
01:01:10,080 --> 01:01:13,480
Speaker 3: or when she's wrong, she becomes silent and has nothing

1274
01:01:13,520 --> 01:01:16,360
Speaker 3: to say. She's toxic to my brother when they think

1275
01:01:16,400 --> 01:01:19,120
Speaker 3: they're in private, calling him names to make him feel

1276
01:01:19,480 --> 01:01:22,280
Speaker 3: or even hitting him. The only time I've heard excitement

1277
01:01:22,360 --> 01:01:24,760
Speaker 3: or interest in her voice is when she's gossiping about

1278
01:01:24,760 --> 01:01:28,480
Speaker 3: someone else, and with that same mouth, she'll get defensive

1279
01:01:28,880 --> 01:01:31,800
Speaker 3: and offended when people bring up her past. I have

1280
01:01:31,840 --> 01:01:34,880
Speaker 3: no idea what her past is, so no tea about that.

1281
01:01:35,480 --> 01:01:38,480
Speaker 3: The thing is, I don't think anyone cares for his person.

1282
01:01:38,840 --> 01:01:41,080
Speaker 3: No one cares enough for this girl to say, Hey,

1283
01:01:41,720 --> 01:01:44,480
Speaker 3: what the heck are you doing being a bum in

1284
01:01:44,480 --> 01:01:47,840
Speaker 3: a stranger's basement. I could say it, but I'm done

1285
01:01:47,880 --> 01:01:50,360
Speaker 3: with this girl. I'm not the one for her. The

1286
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:53,440
Speaker 3: only way I'll respect her is if or when she leaves.

1287
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:56,560
Speaker 3: My parents have just accepted that she's part of the

1288
01:01:56,600 --> 01:02:00,480
Speaker 3: house now. I don't understand why, after two two years,

1289
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:04,080
Speaker 3: my brother's girlfriend hasn't even tried to get close to

1290
01:02:04,160 --> 01:02:07,680
Speaker 3: our parents. She comes and leaves the house as she pleases,

1291
01:02:08,000 --> 01:02:10,840
Speaker 3: even coming home late into the night without a word

1292
01:02:10,880 --> 01:02:15,400
Speaker 3: to them. She pays zero respect. Often my parents' meal

1293
01:02:15,480 --> 01:02:18,360
Speaker 3: times are delayed because of her. As long as the

1294
01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:20,720
Speaker 3: girlfriend is in the kitchen, they can't make their food

1295
01:02:20,760 --> 01:02:26,040
Speaker 3: because she occupies the entire space. She always cooks so much,

1296
01:02:26,120 --> 01:02:30,080
Speaker 3: but never shares or eats with them. A completely thoughtless person.

1297
01:02:30,760 --> 01:02:33,800
Speaker 3: It's maddening that they tolerate her. I said all this

1298
01:02:33,880 --> 01:02:36,840
Speaker 3: to rant about my experience, but from her point of view,

1299
01:02:36,920 --> 01:02:40,600
Speaker 3: I'm sure it's a great time. Despite the awkward living situation,

1300
01:02:40,760 --> 01:02:43,440
Speaker 3: she has plenty of reason to stay. My brother pays

1301
01:02:43,440 --> 01:02:46,520
Speaker 3: for everything for her, including several vacations throughout the year.

1302
01:02:47,240 --> 01:02:49,840
Speaker 3: I think he's been trying to find her a proper job,

1303
01:02:49,920 --> 01:02:53,920
Speaker 3: but she's not qualified or motivated enough. On the bright side,

1304
01:02:54,040 --> 01:02:56,040
Speaker 3: I will be moving in with my boyfriend of two

1305
01:02:56,160 --> 01:02:59,760
Speaker 3: years in the new year. This stress will be behind me,

1306
01:03:00,200 --> 01:03:04,240
Speaker 3: but I hate the thought of leaving knowing that she's there. Okay,

1307
01:03:04,800 --> 01:03:07,440
Speaker 3: I'm done ranting. If you made it all the way

1308
01:03:07,480 --> 01:03:10,120
Speaker 3: down here, thank you, Please tell me read it. Am

1309
01:03:10,200 --> 01:03:13,160
Speaker 3: I wrong for hating this person? And then there's a

1310
01:03:13,200 --> 01:03:14,160
Speaker 3: small update after that.

1311
01:03:14,360 --> 01:03:17,040
Speaker 1: No, I don't think you're wrong for disliking them or

1312
01:03:17,080 --> 01:03:19,640
Speaker 1: not respecting them. Think you were in the wrong for

1313
01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:23,160
Speaker 1: not confronting her. Well, the boyfriend should have confronted her,

1314
01:03:23,560 --> 01:03:25,320
Speaker 1: the parents should have said something, and I know you

1315
01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:27,920
Speaker 1: got it easy out, but go out with a bang. Yeah.

1316
01:03:27,960 --> 01:03:29,880
Speaker 3: I mean, if you're not gonna be living there, then

1317
01:03:29,920 --> 01:03:32,440
Speaker 3: like it doesn't have to be awkward for anyone. It

1318
01:03:32,440 --> 01:03:34,600
Speaker 3: would only be awkward if you're living there still with

1319
01:03:34,720 --> 01:03:37,520
Speaker 3: her and saying these bad things. But like if you

1320
01:03:37,640 --> 01:03:39,720
Speaker 3: leave then and no one else seems to have a

1321
01:03:39,720 --> 01:03:42,920
Speaker 3: problem with it, then there's no other awkwardness in that situation.

1322
01:03:43,040 --> 01:03:45,360
Speaker 1: Like what if your brother's girlfriend just like moved in

1323
01:03:45,720 --> 01:03:46,800
Speaker 1: and was just doing all this.

1324
01:03:47,000 --> 01:03:49,439
Speaker 3: That would be weird. It's also like it's not even

1325
01:03:49,640 --> 01:03:52,400
Speaker 3: just the moving it. It's like it's just all of

1326
01:03:52,440 --> 01:03:56,160
Speaker 3: the lying and then using the space, offering someone else's

1327
01:03:56,200 --> 01:03:59,280
Speaker 3: space to other people, like using it for babysitting and

1328
01:03:59,320 --> 01:04:02,160
Speaker 3: for friends to pregame so they're drinking at their house,

1329
01:04:02,320 --> 01:04:04,919
Speaker 3: like just all that stuff. Just that's just a lot.

1330
01:04:05,040 --> 01:04:07,160
Speaker 1: It was like animals showed up at your house and

1331
01:04:07,200 --> 01:04:09,440
Speaker 1: you did nothing to get rid of It's like, oh, okay, cool.

1332
01:04:09,560 --> 01:04:11,479
Speaker 3: It's like, all right, that's just that lives there now,

1333
01:04:11,560 --> 01:04:13,400
Speaker 3: it's a part of the house now. Never killing a

1334
01:04:13,440 --> 01:04:16,280
Speaker 3: spider and then just like having them breed and just

1335
01:04:16,320 --> 01:04:18,960
Speaker 3: your house just filled with spiders and cobwebs, because that's

1336
01:04:19,040 --> 01:04:21,760
Speaker 3: just there. There is still a little update, so let's

1337
01:04:21,760 --> 01:04:24,080
Speaker 3: get into it. Thank you to those that left their

1338
01:04:24,120 --> 01:04:27,960
Speaker 3: two cents. I appreciate the different perspective. The living situation

1339
01:04:28,040 --> 01:04:31,000
Speaker 3: has not changed, but I do have some new things

1340
01:04:31,000 --> 01:04:34,040
Speaker 3: to share about it all. My brother recently admitted to

1341
01:04:34,080 --> 01:04:36,520
Speaker 3: me that he doesn't even like his girlfriend, so no

1342
01:04:36,560 --> 01:04:40,720
Speaker 3: one wants her there except for her. That's insane. He

1343
01:04:40,760 --> 01:04:44,040
Speaker 3: doesn't take the relationship seriously and has no long term

1344
01:04:44,080 --> 01:04:45,160
Speaker 3: plans to stay with her.

1345
01:04:45,240 --> 01:04:47,400
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, break up with her.

1346
01:04:47,960 --> 01:04:50,760
Speaker 3: He is also confused as to why she is still

1347
01:04:50,760 --> 01:04:54,080
Speaker 3: with him, and is apparently telling her often to leave

1348
01:04:54,960 --> 01:04:59,080
Speaker 3: break up, especially when they have disagreements. From when I

1349
01:04:59,120 --> 01:05:01,520
Speaker 3: gathered he's still so with her partly because he feels

1350
01:05:01,560 --> 01:05:06,240
Speaker 3: bad for her, and partly because she's convenient. Dang, that

1351
01:05:06,560 --> 01:05:10,160
Speaker 3: is rough. Yeah, if you're staying with someone just because

1352
01:05:10,160 --> 01:05:14,040
Speaker 3: they're convenient, that's like literally what settling is, so you

1353
01:05:14,160 --> 01:05:18,000
Speaker 3: probably should look for something a little more fulfilling. By

1354
01:05:18,040 --> 01:05:21,800
Speaker 3: the way, what is extremely convenient is that we are

1355
01:05:21,840 --> 01:05:25,040
Speaker 3: alive every single weekday at three pm PSD. All you

1356
01:05:25,080 --> 01:05:28,320
Speaker 3: have to do is top that profile and so much

1357
01:05:28,360 --> 01:05:31,840
Speaker 3: more fulfilling than any sort of relationship you could settle for.

1358
01:05:32,000 --> 01:05:34,480
Speaker 3: It turns out that my brother and I are in

1359
01:05:34,560 --> 01:05:38,560
Speaker 3: agreement about everything I had concluded about her upbringing, laziness,

1360
01:05:38,600 --> 01:05:42,480
Speaker 3: and having no real friends with one expectation. She is

1361
01:05:42,560 --> 01:05:45,640
Speaker 3: the oldest sibling, not the middle child. Her mom forty

1362
01:05:45,640 --> 01:05:47,760
Speaker 3: one female, was fourteen, which.

1363
01:05:47,600 --> 01:05:50,919
Speaker 1: She had her Oh my gosh, she had to grow

1364
01:05:51,000 --> 01:05:52,680
Speaker 1: up in such a hard household.

1365
01:05:53,000 --> 01:05:55,800
Speaker 3: Explains why the grandmother raised her and why the mom

1366
01:05:55,960 --> 01:05:59,080
Speaker 3: was never really a mom. The mother is currently remarried

1367
01:05:59,120 --> 01:06:02,360
Speaker 3: to some British guy who gives my brother gross predator vibes.

1368
01:06:02,440 --> 01:06:05,200
Speaker 3: He worries for the youngest of his girlfriend's siblings, who's

1369
01:06:05,280 --> 01:06:08,720
Speaker 3: somewhere between sixteen and eighteen years old. Well, that's a

1370
01:06:08,760 --> 01:06:10,840
Speaker 3: weird note to end on, but that is the end

1371
01:06:10,840 --> 01:06:15,240
Speaker 3: of that story. Hopefully the siblings are okay. That's a

1372
01:06:15,240 --> 01:06:18,480
Speaker 3: whole another story in itself, but with the story at hand,

1373
01:06:18,560 --> 01:06:22,520
Speaker 3: the main plot line. If the brother isn't even interested,

1374
01:06:22,600 --> 01:06:24,959
Speaker 3: it's like, why is she just there?

1375
01:06:25,080 --> 01:06:27,120
Speaker 1: She's like, Yeah, I don't know why I've been doing

1376
01:06:27,160 --> 01:06:28,960
Speaker 1: this for the past couple of years. Why are we

1377
01:06:29,040 --> 01:06:30,080
Speaker 1: doing this, Like.

1378
01:06:30,080 --> 01:06:33,000
Speaker 3: What, Just let her go? Man, I want Opie to

1379
01:06:33,040 --> 01:06:36,160
Speaker 3: talk to the parents about it, talk to everyone about it.

1380
01:06:36,160 --> 01:06:38,840
Speaker 3: Seems like you've got the brother on board. I'm sure

1381
01:06:38,880 --> 01:06:41,200
Speaker 3: you could get the parents on board and just talk

1382
01:06:41,280 --> 01:06:43,640
Speaker 3: to the girl or just bring it up. I feel

1383
01:06:43,640 --> 01:06:45,840
Speaker 3: like you just be like hey, like why are you

1384
01:06:45,920 --> 01:06:48,080
Speaker 3: living here? Or like are you gonna pay rent?

1385
01:06:48,160 --> 01:06:50,200
Speaker 1: It's been like four years and the parents haven't said anything.

1386
01:06:50,320 --> 01:06:52,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, well I think it was two years, but still

1387
01:06:52,920 --> 01:06:54,520
Speaker 3: so much time.

1388
01:06:55,000 --> 01:06:57,360
Speaker 1: She started coming over more and more in twenty twenty

1389
01:06:57,960 --> 01:06:59,920
Speaker 1: after the pandemic, and then she like just kind of

1390
01:07:00,200 --> 01:07:02,120
Speaker 1: fully moved in. But I think she did say two

1391
01:07:02,160 --> 01:07:05,840
Speaker 1: and a half a second. But still, oh my gosh.

1392
01:07:06,000 --> 01:07:10,600
Speaker 3: Honestly, you guys Opie's family grow up bear, because I

1393
01:07:10,600 --> 01:07:12,960
Speaker 3: don't want you to be a doormat, but you are.

1394
01:07:14,080 --> 01:07:16,640
Speaker 1: My husband confessed he's in love with my sister, and

1395
01:07:16,680 --> 01:07:19,480
Speaker 1: she confessed she knew. At least we're all on the

1396
01:07:19,520 --> 01:07:22,960
Speaker 1: same page. Yesterday we had dinner with my sister and

1397
01:07:23,040 --> 01:07:26,440
Speaker 1: her husband, and we had a lot to drink. After

1398
01:07:26,520 --> 01:07:28,680
Speaker 1: my sister and her husband left, my husband and I

1399
01:07:28,720 --> 01:07:31,480
Speaker 1: had the spicy Sali. Neither of us were tired, so

1400
01:07:31,560 --> 01:07:34,920
Speaker 1: We continued a bit of wine, listening to music in

1401
01:07:34,960 --> 01:07:38,680
Speaker 1: the background, and everything was amazing. I thought, by the way,

1402
01:07:38,720 --> 01:07:42,040
Speaker 1: this comes from throwaway anxious bed on the ar size Okay,

1403
01:07:42,080 --> 01:07:45,080
Speaker 1: storytime Subreddit. My husband was smiling in a good mood.

1404
01:07:45,440 --> 01:07:47,880
Speaker 1: He's always like that when he's drunk. We talked about

1405
01:07:47,920 --> 01:07:50,720
Speaker 1: my sister and her husband. He just suddenly said, I'm

1406
01:07:50,880 --> 01:07:55,680
Speaker 1: so in love with sisters name. I said, what he said,

1407
01:07:55,760 --> 01:07:59,000
Speaker 1: I'm so desperately in love with sister's name. What would

1408
01:07:59,000 --> 01:08:04,080
Speaker 1: I do to taste her lips? She's brilliant, looked dreamy,

1409
01:08:04,240 --> 01:08:07,360
Speaker 1: and was still smiling. I said, how drunk are you?

1410
01:08:07,560 --> 01:08:11,240
Speaker 1: He said, probably plenty. I was drunk too, but it

1411
01:08:11,560 --> 01:08:13,720
Speaker 1: still hit me like a ton of bricks. I just

1412
01:08:13,800 --> 01:08:16,439
Speaker 1: sat there silent. He was so in his own world,

1413
01:08:16,439 --> 01:08:19,080
Speaker 1: with a smile etched on his face. He looked like

1414
01:08:19,160 --> 01:08:21,599
Speaker 1: he was a million miles away. I went to bed

1415
01:08:21,680 --> 01:08:25,599
Speaker 1: this morning, all memories came rushing and now I'm not drunk,

1416
01:08:25,600 --> 01:08:28,320
Speaker 1: and it hit me even more what he said. I'm horrified,

1417
01:08:28,680 --> 01:08:31,839
Speaker 1: and in my heart is in pieces. He hasn't mentioned

1418
01:08:31,920 --> 01:08:35,320
Speaker 1: anything and is acting normal, as if yet hungover. I

1419
01:08:35,360 --> 01:08:38,080
Speaker 1: don't know what to do now he has always had

1420
01:08:38,120 --> 01:08:41,840
Speaker 1: a good relationship with my sister with mutual respect. Should

1421
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:45,000
Speaker 1: I just ignore his drunken comments? Was that just him

1422
01:08:45,040 --> 01:08:47,479
Speaker 1: being drunk? Should I wait for him to start talking?

1423
01:08:47,760 --> 01:08:50,360
Speaker 1: Not sure if he even remembers. What about the spicy

1424
01:08:50,400 --> 01:08:53,519
Speaker 1: sleep we had? Something was different, even though I loved it.

1425
01:08:53,640 --> 01:08:55,920
Speaker 1: I thought it was one of the best spicy sleeps

1426
01:08:55,960 --> 01:08:59,200
Speaker 1: of my life. He said he was different, passionate, tender

1427
01:08:59,240 --> 01:09:01,479
Speaker 1: and loving. When he he kept saying, I love you.

1428
01:09:01,479 --> 01:09:05,320
Speaker 1: You were brilliant. Ps. My sister has been monest and

1429
01:09:05,520 --> 01:09:09,040
Speaker 1: Tom Boyce, but she has lost twenty five kilograms and

1430
01:09:09,080 --> 01:09:11,599
Speaker 1: has been working out for a year. She had a

1431
01:09:11,680 --> 01:09:15,519
Speaker 1: form fitting red dress yesterday with red lips. She looked

1432
01:09:15,560 --> 01:09:19,120
Speaker 1: stunning and we all gave her compliments about it. She

1433
01:09:19,280 --> 01:09:21,360
Speaker 1: was very happy about it. I don't know why I

1434
01:09:21,400 --> 01:09:24,960
Speaker 1: included this. I thought maybe it's relevant because on top

1435
01:09:25,040 --> 01:09:28,320
Speaker 1: of having spots to sleep, sister looking good, being he

1436
01:09:28,439 --> 01:09:29,799
Speaker 1: was all up and was like, oh.

1437
01:09:32,040 --> 01:09:35,120
Speaker 2: Does she think in that he was just like pretending

1438
01:09:35,280 --> 01:09:37,360
Speaker 2: that he was her sister.

1439
01:09:41,640 --> 01:09:43,960
Speaker 3: It's terrific. It's terrible.

1440
01:09:44,280 --> 01:09:48,800
Speaker 1: I would definitely bring this up hardcore and maybe even

1441
01:09:48,880 --> 01:09:51,120
Speaker 1: look for a separation. I mean, I know, I'm just

1442
01:09:51,160 --> 01:09:53,280
Speaker 1: throwing this around, but I would probably take a few

1443
01:09:53,680 --> 01:09:55,400
Speaker 1: a day or two, maybe even a week.

1444
01:09:55,640 --> 01:09:58,280
Speaker 2: He immediately press him on what he said and if

1445
01:09:58,320 --> 01:10:00,880
Speaker 2: he goes I don't remember that, to go, well, you

1446
01:10:01,160 --> 01:10:03,559
Speaker 2: said it, so now we have to talk about it. Yeah,

1447
01:10:03,600 --> 01:10:06,160
Speaker 2: when people say that kind of stuff when they're it's

1448
01:10:06,240 --> 01:10:07,600
Speaker 2: not because they don't mean it.

1449
01:10:07,760 --> 01:10:09,879
Speaker 1: It's because they do mean it. Update.

1450
01:10:10,200 --> 01:10:10,320
Speaker 3: Hi.

1451
01:10:10,840 --> 01:10:13,320
Speaker 1: The rules of the update here is three days. That's

1452
01:10:13,360 --> 01:10:15,799
Speaker 1: why I didn't update Sunday when I talk to my husband,

1453
01:10:16,000 --> 01:10:19,240
Speaker 1: also because I'm very conflicted. I talked to my husband.

1454
01:10:19,560 --> 01:10:22,240
Speaker 1: He said he didn't remember a lot that night, especially

1455
01:10:22,280 --> 01:10:25,679
Speaker 1: after my sister and her husband left and we continued drinking.

1456
01:10:26,120 --> 01:10:28,800
Speaker 1: I told him what he said, and he didn't look

1457
01:10:28,880 --> 01:10:33,960
Speaker 1: shocked nor surprise, just that he didn't remember saying anything.

1458
01:10:34,120 --> 01:10:36,839
Speaker 1: I asked him if he failed it before we started.

1459
01:10:37,640 --> 01:10:40,920
Speaker 1: He said he always loved my sister because she's kind

1460
01:10:41,040 --> 01:10:44,519
Speaker 1: and warm. Then he said he thought she looked very beautiful,

1461
01:10:44,760 --> 01:10:48,000
Speaker 1: and it's probably in his self thought she was hot.

1462
01:10:48,200 --> 01:10:50,519
Speaker 1: He said it is normal that people are curious about

1463
01:10:50,560 --> 01:10:53,280
Speaker 1: the opposite. He said that he has always thought she's

1464
01:10:53,320 --> 01:10:56,040
Speaker 1: beautiful because all of my family is good looking. But

1465
01:10:56,200 --> 01:10:59,320
Speaker 1: her weight loss gave her confidence and she looked happy,

1466
01:10:59,439 --> 01:11:01,840
Speaker 1: and he was happy for her. I asked him if

1467
01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:05,240
Speaker 1: he could choose between us. He said he was shocked,

1468
01:11:05,280 --> 01:11:07,320
Speaker 1: and said that I was his wife and that the

1469
01:11:07,479 --> 01:11:10,360
Speaker 1: mother of his children, and he loved me. So I

1470
01:11:10,560 --> 01:11:12,760
Speaker 1: asked him if he had just met us, I wasn't

1471
01:11:12,840 --> 01:11:15,439
Speaker 1: his wife or anything, and my sister wasn't married. He

1472
01:11:15,680 --> 01:11:19,519
Speaker 1: said that this was getting ridiculous, and he hated playing

1473
01:11:19,520 --> 01:11:22,320
Speaker 1: the hypothetical games because people get worked up fight about

1474
01:11:22,400 --> 01:11:25,320
Speaker 1: things that aren't real. Yeah, I mean, that's that's fair.

1475
01:11:25,479 --> 01:11:27,800
Speaker 2: I actually I agree with him in that, because it's

1476
01:11:27,840 --> 01:11:30,439
Speaker 2: not fair to be like, okay, well, in this hypothetical context,

1477
01:11:30,479 --> 01:11:32,560
Speaker 2: it's not real. Would you date my sister instead of me?

1478
01:11:32,800 --> 01:11:34,479
Speaker 2: It's like, how can I possibly give you an answer

1479
01:11:34,520 --> 01:11:36,519
Speaker 2: to that? You want to keep him rooted in reality,

1480
01:11:36,560 --> 01:11:38,200
Speaker 2: which is like this is what you said, How do

1481
01:11:38,280 --> 01:11:40,519
Speaker 2: you really feel? I need to know right now if

1482
01:11:40,640 --> 01:11:43,080
Speaker 2: like there's a universe where you're gonna leave me, because

1483
01:11:43,200 --> 01:11:46,439
Speaker 2: like what, you love my sister, like you're infatuated with her,

1484
01:11:46,680 --> 01:11:48,320
Speaker 2: and it's like, I don't know what to think.

1485
01:11:48,479 --> 01:11:50,640
Speaker 1: I think we still have plenty more left, but we

1486
01:11:50,760 --> 01:11:52,600
Speaker 1: got a little bit more. It sounds like he was

1487
01:11:52,760 --> 01:11:57,439
Speaker 1: just real real After dinner he said that he loved

1488
01:11:57,479 --> 01:12:00,519
Speaker 1: me very much and he's happy, and I should overthink

1489
01:12:00,600 --> 01:12:02,760
Speaker 1: what he said when he was too drunk to even

1490
01:12:02,880 --> 01:12:05,720
Speaker 1: know who or where he was. I'm just not sure

1491
01:12:05,840 --> 01:12:10,120
Speaker 1: we got one more updates. Do we press him more?

1492
01:12:10,479 --> 01:12:11,360
Speaker 1: Should we believe him?

1493
01:12:11,760 --> 01:12:15,400
Speaker 2: I think I personally where I'm at is I believe

1494
01:12:15,479 --> 01:12:18,280
Speaker 2: him based on how he responded, where it's like, you're

1495
01:12:18,320 --> 01:12:21,360
Speaker 2: my wife, like you're my wife, and it's like, I

1496
01:12:21,479 --> 01:12:23,720
Speaker 2: don't you know, we don't have the entire picture of

1497
01:12:23,800 --> 01:12:26,720
Speaker 2: who they are as people on their dynamic, but it's

1498
01:12:26,840 --> 01:12:30,599
Speaker 2: like they were heavily like to the point of who

1499
01:12:30,880 --> 01:12:32,680
Speaker 2: like This guy says he doesn't remember a lot of

1500
01:12:32,760 --> 01:12:35,479
Speaker 2: the night before. Yeah, it still is concerned. It's definitely

1501
01:12:35,520 --> 01:12:38,439
Speaker 2: concerning that he said it. But I think his response

1502
01:12:38,479 --> 01:12:42,479
Speaker 2: the day after is in line with how a person

1503
01:12:42,520 --> 01:12:45,720
Speaker 2: will respond who actually doesn't like would never be like

1504
01:12:45,880 --> 01:12:48,800
Speaker 2: I actually want to lead, like when there's nothing, there's

1505
01:12:48,840 --> 01:12:52,240
Speaker 2: no light behind the eyes anymore, who knows what's being said? Yeah,

1506
01:12:52,320 --> 01:12:54,920
Speaker 2: he probably does think that the sister is hot. I

1507
01:12:55,000 --> 01:12:58,719
Speaker 2: don't think he would ever leave ope for her sister.

1508
01:12:59,000 --> 01:13:02,920
Speaker 1: Update two again, I have been delaying my update because honestly,

1509
01:13:03,200 --> 01:13:06,639
Speaker 1: I am still fatigued. It has been rough. My husband

1510
01:13:06,640 --> 01:13:09,160
Speaker 1: and I have been to therapy, and I don't know

1511
01:13:09,360 --> 01:13:13,160
Speaker 1: if I like therapy or if we are making any progress.

1512
01:13:13,600 --> 01:13:16,599
Speaker 1: Sometimes I feel like we are not making any progress

1513
01:13:16,720 --> 01:13:19,160
Speaker 1: fast enough, and sometimes I just want to give up

1514
01:13:19,280 --> 01:13:21,840
Speaker 1: and disappear. I have found out that my sister knew

1515
01:13:22,240 --> 01:13:26,639
Speaker 1: all along about my husband's feelings for her all these years,

1516
01:13:26,760 --> 01:13:29,840
Speaker 1: and she has never even bothered to alert me. She's

1517
01:13:29,880 --> 01:13:32,400
Speaker 1: known for years. I went on thinking I was happily

1518
01:13:32,439 --> 01:13:34,760
Speaker 1: married to a man whose heart I thought was mine.

1519
01:13:35,200 --> 01:13:37,439
Speaker 1: I yelled and raged at her and cried, and she

1520
01:13:37,640 --> 01:13:40,519
Speaker 1: cried too, and apologized and said that she didn't want

1521
01:13:40,560 --> 01:13:42,680
Speaker 1: to hurt me and didn't know what to do. I

1522
01:13:42,760 --> 01:13:45,640
Speaker 1: feel a lot of anger and resentment towards her, and

1523
01:13:45,760 --> 01:13:48,960
Speaker 1: I have been playing my years with my husband, trying

1524
01:13:49,000 --> 01:13:52,680
Speaker 1: to remember and every interaction with my sister and if

1525
01:13:52,760 --> 01:13:57,479
Speaker 1: I missed anything by being blindly, am I just so confused?

1526
01:13:57,560 --> 01:14:00,719
Speaker 1: I can't remember anything and that is remote. You're alarming.

1527
01:14:00,800 --> 01:14:03,679
Speaker 1: And yet my sister never tried to avoid my husband.

1528
01:14:04,120 --> 01:14:08,479
Speaker 1: She gladly spent weekends, holidays, and vacation with my husband

1529
01:14:08,600 --> 01:14:11,759
Speaker 1: and me, wouldn't she at least have tried to distance herself.

1530
01:14:12,240 --> 01:14:14,840
Speaker 1: According to her, it was me. She wanted to have

1531
01:14:14,880 --> 01:14:16,920
Speaker 1: a relationship with me, and my children are the most

1532
01:14:16,920 --> 01:14:19,679
Speaker 1: important people to her. She didn't want to be apart

1533
01:14:19,760 --> 01:14:22,960
Speaker 1: from me. She told my husband that he promised never

1534
01:14:23,040 --> 01:14:26,160
Speaker 1: to make her uncomfortable, but she knew that he had

1535
01:14:26,200 --> 01:14:30,799
Speaker 1: feelings for her. She refused to answer if he still did, however,

1536
01:14:30,920 --> 01:14:34,560
Speaker 1: which is a answer itself. She panicked and said no,

1537
01:14:35,280 --> 01:14:37,840
Speaker 1: and please believe me, and you can believe that we

1538
01:14:37,920 --> 01:14:41,759
Speaker 1: will go live every day at three PMPSD on YouTube.

1539
01:14:42,000 --> 01:14:45,040
Speaker 1: Just tapped or a profile. We have a little bit more.

1540
01:14:45,400 --> 01:14:48,160
Speaker 1: The sister also betrayed her. I had told her that

1541
01:14:48,240 --> 01:14:51,360
Speaker 1: I needed some distance. She apologized and started crying. I

1542
01:14:51,400 --> 01:14:54,320
Speaker 1: haven't spoken to her maybe three weeks. I heard that

1543
01:14:54,439 --> 01:14:57,880
Speaker 1: her husband is upset and has left the house because

1544
01:14:57,960 --> 01:15:00,479
Speaker 1: he didn't know either. I don't know what, but more

1545
01:15:00,560 --> 01:15:02,680
Speaker 1: to update. I have tried to keep it simple. I

1546
01:15:02,760 --> 01:15:05,960
Speaker 1: feel like I need advice now more than ever. And honestly,

1547
01:15:06,120 --> 01:15:09,639
Speaker 1: therapy is living me empty. After every session, it feels

1548
01:15:09,920 --> 01:15:12,960
Speaker 1: I don't know how to describe it, methodical and a

1549
01:15:13,040 --> 01:15:16,840
Speaker 1: matter of factual, only practical and logical aspects that need

1550
01:15:16,920 --> 01:15:19,920
Speaker 1: to be soft. Am I right being angry at my sister?

1551
01:15:20,360 --> 01:15:22,680
Speaker 1: Am I too optimistic? This could still work with me

1552
01:15:22,840 --> 01:15:26,000
Speaker 1: and my husband? Can he love me just me? I

1553
01:15:26,120 --> 01:15:28,679
Speaker 1: don't know how to move on. I don't want to forget.

1554
01:15:28,840 --> 01:15:30,800
Speaker 1: I want to forgive. I think you have the right

1555
01:15:30,840 --> 01:15:32,479
Speaker 1: mindset here. You have the right to be mad at

1556
01:15:32,479 --> 01:15:34,360
Speaker 1: your sister. You have the right to try to work

1557
01:15:34,400 --> 01:15:36,200
Speaker 1: this out with your husband. I think a new therapist

1558
01:15:36,520 --> 01:15:38,840
Speaker 1: would work one hundred percent. And I think everyone just

1559
01:15:38,880 --> 01:15:40,920
Speaker 1: needs some time to process this and to come to

1560
01:15:41,080 --> 01:15:44,840
Speaker 1: the actual facts that who they actually love. And people

1561
01:15:45,200 --> 01:15:48,120
Speaker 1: can have a wandering eye sometimes and make like scenarios

1562
01:15:48,160 --> 01:15:50,360
Speaker 1: in their head. I'm gonna check for an update. My

1563
01:15:50,439 --> 01:15:53,240
Speaker 1: sister can't have children. I don't know what to do,

1564
01:15:53,479 --> 01:15:56,040
Speaker 1: to be honest, Sometimes I wake up in the morning

1565
01:15:56,120 --> 01:15:58,360
Speaker 1: thinking nothing is a big deal. I have a good

1566
01:15:58,439 --> 01:16:01,080
Speaker 1: life and my children are well loved. Sometimes I want

1567
01:16:01,120 --> 01:16:03,400
Speaker 1: to scream, and I hate everyone, and I want to

1568
01:16:03,439 --> 01:16:05,280
Speaker 1: kick him out and never see him again. I have

1569
01:16:05,400 --> 01:16:07,400
Speaker 1: spoken to brother in law now. He seems to be

1570
01:16:07,520 --> 01:16:11,880
Speaker 1: serious about divorcing my sister. He said that something broke

1571
01:16:12,080 --> 01:16:16,479
Speaker 1: inside of him, his pride maybe she's catching strays, dude,

1572
01:16:16,520 --> 01:16:20,960
Speaker 1: it's not She's not the one in love with this guy. Yeah, yeah, true, true.

1573
01:16:21,080 --> 01:16:22,920
Speaker 1: I think I wish that guy do about that. I

1574
01:16:23,000 --> 01:16:23,880
Speaker 1: think that guy's in the wrong.

1575
01:16:24,080 --> 01:16:26,720
Speaker 2: I mean what I think our last story, like op

1576
01:16:26,880 --> 01:16:28,880
Speaker 2: said that they were insecure, needed to go to therapy.

1577
01:16:29,080 --> 01:16:31,720
Speaker 1: Freaking the sister's husband definitely.

1578
01:16:31,360 --> 01:16:33,960
Speaker 2: Needs to go to therapy for his insecurities, because just

1579
01:16:34,200 --> 01:16:37,000
Speaker 2: finding out another guy is in love with your wife

1580
01:16:37,120 --> 01:16:38,400
Speaker 2: is going to make you divorce her.

1581
01:16:38,720 --> 01:16:42,160
Speaker 1: What's wrong with you? Yeah, that's that's insanity, dude, this

1582
01:16:42,360 --> 01:16:45,080
Speaker 1: is crazy. I can't wait for the next update. But yeah,

1583
01:16:45,160 --> 01:16:47,720
Speaker 1: we definitely need to keep an eye out for that.

1584
01:16:47,960 --> 01:16:51,480
Speaker 1: Definitely go to another therapist, find a good couple's counselor,

1585
01:16:52,080 --> 01:16:54,760
Speaker 1: and try your best to work through it in the

1586
01:16:54,800 --> 01:16:57,760
Speaker 1: most honest way possible. But that's gonna be scary, it's

1587
01:16:57,800 --> 01:16:59,320
Speaker 1: gonna be hard. The end of that one,