Speaker 1: Hello, what's up everybody, how you guys doing. Welcome to
Speaker 1: the Therapy Gecko Podcast. Thanks for being here. I'm feeling
Speaker 1: pretty good today. Actually, I am back from Japan and
Speaker 1: I am chilling and ready to talk to some people
Speaker 1: on the phone today. As of recording this, it is
Speaker 1: March eighth, twoenty twenty five. I'm feeling pretty good. It's
Speaker 1: interesting to still be here. I know that's a weird
Speaker 1: thing to say, but I think I always thought that
Speaker 1: once you hit a certain age, you just explode and
Speaker 1: you become you know, it's hard to like imagine you
Speaker 1: ever have those things where like you can't even imagine
Speaker 1: what life is like at a certain time, and then
Speaker 1: you're there and you're like, oh, I'm still me. I'm
Speaker 1: still here. I didn't just explode. Life just keeps going.
Speaker 1: And I think that feeling used to Oh, I'm live
Speaker 1: on Twitch. Someone on the twitch chats that they turned
Speaker 1: sixty two last year. How are you feeling? Wooll fourth
Speaker 1: turning sixty two. I'm curious, But anyway, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: actually feeling pretty good today. I'm ready to take some
Speaker 1: phone calls. I'm ready to talk to people. I've been
Speaker 1: doing a lot of gek mail lately because I don't
Speaker 1: think I was in as great of a position to
Speaker 1: take phone calls. But now I feel good and I
Speaker 1: actually feel pretty ready to talk to some people on
Speaker 1: the phone. So I'm gonna do that right now.
Speaker 2: Hello.
Speaker 3: Hello, oh hello Lyle.
Speaker 1: Yes is this h Janet?
Speaker 4: It is yes, indeed, Janet.
Speaker 1: Well, Janet, I'm calling you back for you sent me
Speaker 1: a text. But I read an email on one of
Speaker 1: the mare gek mails from a woman who married her horse.
Speaker 1: I believe me, and I believe that is you, and
Speaker 1: so I am.
Speaker 2: That is me. Did you have a picture?
Speaker 1: I did see the picture. I did see the picture. So,
Speaker 1: uh you for people who didn't hear that email or
Speaker 1: that episode or whatever, and if do you want to
Speaker 1: just give us some context of you know, what happened?
Speaker 5: Sure?
Speaker 2: So I I for my sixtieth birthday, I had a
Speaker 2: wedding party. So I made a suit for my horse
Speaker 2: out of a blanket, you know, a horse blanket. I
Speaker 2: converted it and he had a tie and everything, and
Speaker 2: I had some socks on his legs and I had
Speaker 2: a bouquet of carrots and uh, yeah, it was a
Speaker 2: who It was really fun And.
Speaker 1: You are there would have been the benefits thus far
Speaker 1: of marrying your horse.
Speaker 2: Uh, well, you know, I don't even have the horse anymore.
Speaker 1: So, oh no, what do you mean you sold the
Speaker 1: fucking horse? That's Janet. That's so fucked up up things.
Speaker 1: You got married to a horse and then you sold it?
Speaker 5: What did you.
Speaker 2: Well the reasons, I'm taking care of my mom full
Speaker 2: time right now. She's just menia and so that's time
Speaker 2: consuming and the expense very very expensive. So yeah, since
Speaker 2: I sold my horses, I have money.
Speaker 1: Now can I ask it? And it's okay if it's
Speaker 1: a personal question you would like not to answer. I'm kidding.
Speaker 1: What do you sell a horse for? What's the horlet
Speaker 1: looked like?
Speaker 4: Uh?
Speaker 2: So I sold him for two thousand dollars. And then
Speaker 2: I had another horse. I had two horses at one time,
Speaker 2: and so I sold the other horse for five thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: So the other horse was younger and had well, they
Speaker 2: both had papers, but I just felt like she was
Speaker 2: more valuable mayor, she was a mayor, she was younger.
Speaker 1: What else are you in the horse? The horse you sold?
Speaker 1: Are you guys divorced? Are you still married? Yeah?
Speaker 2: I don't see him anymore at all. We have no
Speaker 2: kids together, so well, thank.
Speaker 3: God for that.
Speaker 1: What else is going on in life? Janets?
Speaker 2: Well, I just bought a travel trailer. Cool, so U
Speaker 2: thirty foot trailer and mom is currently on hospice. So
Speaker 2: we're looking at months not years, and so I'm looking
Speaker 2: at My next adventure is traveling a little bit with
Speaker 2: my camper and yeah, and then eventually I want to
Speaker 2: settle in Pennsylvania. I love the Hershey Harrisburg area in Pennsylvania.
Speaker 1: Yeah, like Hershey Park.
Speaker 2: Well do you know penn National Racecourse?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 1: I never heard of it.
Speaker 2: Okay, small track in near Harrisburg. It's in Grantville, Pennsylvania,
Speaker 2: And so I worked there when I was much younger.
Speaker 2: I did you know galloped racehorses and ponied horses and
Speaker 2: hot locked horses. And I'm actually going to come full
Speaker 2: circle back to that lifestyle again.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think I'll be riding exercising.
Speaker 1: How long have horses been a part of your life?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Pretty much since I was seven. I started writing lessons. Cool,
Speaker 2: so yeah, I took ten years of lessons and then
Speaker 2: I got my own horse and did four h and
Speaker 2: then I went to horse management school and managed to
Speaker 2: race horse farm, worked on the track, worked on a
Speaker 2: dude ranch, and then decided to do something safer, So
Speaker 2: I went back to school to be a veterinary technician.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, how.
Speaker 1: Long did do How long did you do that for?
Speaker 2: I did ten years in small animal practice, and then
Speaker 2: I did twenty years in research. So I worked with
Speaker 2: mice and rats, and I even I did blood collection
Speaker 2: and injections and surgery and wrote some papers and invented
Speaker 2: some things cool and yeah. Yeah, it was a good,
Speaker 2: good life. And then ended up back in small animal
Speaker 2: practice for a while, right before I started taking care
Speaker 2: of mom and.
Speaker 1: For for all this time were you where were you located?
Speaker 2: Michigan, Michigan. So I worked at the University of Michigan
Speaker 2: a little bit at Wayne State University also cool cool?
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah?
Speaker 1: And where taking care? Where is your mom at? Where
Speaker 1: are you taking care of her at home?
Speaker 2: We lived together our in a house.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're still still in Michigan.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, we like Michigan. But I'm ready
Speaker 2: to ready to move again.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And you know you told me a little bit in
Speaker 1: the email that you sent that I read that you
Speaker 1: want to do You're going to do a podcast where
Speaker 1: you interview folks about the paranorma.
Speaker 2: I thought about that. So I have a lot of ideas.
Speaker 2: I always, you know, I'm thinking about what I can do.
Speaker 2: And because I don't want to take so security till
Speaker 2: I'm sixty seven seventy, maybe you know I'm perfectly capable
Speaker 2: of working. But oh, podcasting. I love the idea of
Speaker 2: podcasting and talking to people, but I don't like the
Speaker 2: idea of doing all the work editing and posting and
Speaker 2: advertising and generating clicks and you know all that.
Speaker 1: Well, you know, well, let me ask you this, do
Speaker 1: you like? Because I'm curious, do you when you think
Speaker 1: about like doing a podcast, is it like something you like?
Speaker 1: Would the podcast need to make money for you to
Speaker 1: like be able to do it or do or do
Speaker 1: you have are you able to just do it?
Speaker 2: Well, that's a good point. I guess I wouldn't. Maybe
Speaker 2: i'd have to have a job. I don't. I do
Speaker 2: need income, So I suppose I could do it on
Speaker 2: the side spare time kind of thing for fun.
Speaker 1: Because well, here's the thing, is like, well, so people
Speaker 1: the listeners can tell from the ads, but like the
Speaker 1: phone call podc this podcast, you know, I do for
Speaker 1: a living, but I do another kind of version of
Speaker 1: my show where I like do it in person, you know,
Speaker 1: and like I set up my little and I actually
Speaker 1: might start doing more episodes like that on you know,
Speaker 1: I might start releasing more episodes like that on audio
Speaker 1: on like uh, you know, this podcast on Spotify and
Speaker 1: Apple podcasts and stuff. But I've recorded several of those
Speaker 1: episodes where like I'm out on the streets interviewing people,
Speaker 1: and I've just I've just I don't know why, but
Speaker 1: I just haven't even posted the you know, I haven't
Speaker 1: even posted them because probably because I got lazy or whatever.
Speaker 1: But it was like it was like I have episodes
Speaker 1: like that recorded that I never posted, but I don't.
Speaker 1: I'm not tripping out about it, because it's like I
Speaker 1: just liked doing the interviews. I just liked being set
Speaker 1: up and getting to chat with folks that I never
Speaker 1: would have chatted with before. And I just liked it.
Speaker 1: So I mean, look, I guess that's I say all
Speaker 1: this to say to you that, like, you know, unless
Speaker 1: if you I don't know, if your whole thing is
Speaker 1: like you have a hankering to build whatever, but like
Speaker 1: you could goddamn very well just take a camera, take,
Speaker 1: take your I take. You could take your iPhone or whatever.
Speaker 1: You could do a minimal, cheap, crappy setup, hint record
Speaker 1: you know, uh uh set up the just to get
Speaker 1: people to talk, and and like, you don't you don't
Speaker 1: have to, you know, go u crazy. You don't have
Speaker 1: you don't have to start a clip page and make
Speaker 1: Instagram reels and yeah, I mean you know, like post
Speaker 1: the thing. You can just post it on YouTube. I'm
Speaker 1: sure you know folks channel. Yeah, Chanel, it doesn't. I
Speaker 1: guess what I'm saying to you is like the you
Speaker 1: don't like you the the the intensive labor. Sure, if
Speaker 1: you want to and if you really want to make
Speaker 1: like a business out of it, and you really want
Speaker 1: to do whatever you can. In fact, you know, do
Speaker 1: do do labor intensive clipping and uh YouTube thumbnails and
Speaker 1: all that stuff. But if you're just doing a podcast
Speaker 1: for fun, it can be it can truly be as
Speaker 1: labor intensive as you want it to be.
Speaker 3: I love that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, just keep it simple, make it fun. It's
Speaker 2: not like I'm trying to get rich off it. I'll
Speaker 2: have my part time job so I have enough income
Speaker 2: to survive in my little trailer. Yeah, good way to
Speaker 2: meet people in the community.
Speaker 1: And also another thing is, you know, I don't know you.
Speaker 1: There may maybe you uh you know, I know you
Speaker 1: you you said you worked at a university.
Speaker 2: I did you know?
Speaker 1: Maybe I don't know. If there's any Internet savvy folks
Speaker 1: in your life who might be able to help you
Speaker 1: out a little bit, you know. That's that's another option,
Speaker 1: if if, if you know that happens to be a
Speaker 1: thing in your life, right. But yeah, again, that's that's
Speaker 1: the thing is like it can be as you don't
Speaker 1: like when you you know, I I assume that because
Speaker 1: you are familiar with me that you're on you know,
Speaker 1: Instagram and TikTok or whatever, and I'm sure you I am.
Speaker 2: Well, my daughter introduced me to you like four years ago.
Speaker 1: Cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And actually you were in Romulus at one time.
Speaker 2: Does that ring a bell? Romulus, Michigan.
Speaker 4: Uh hold on, let me it was four years ago.
Speaker 1: Romulus, Michigan. Rom Yeah, uh am, I hell on? Where
Speaker 1: is that is that near Lansing?
Speaker 2: No, it's near Detroit.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've been Detroit a few times. Yeah, I've been
Speaker 1: to Detroit, like yeah, three times.
Speaker 2: Yeah, uh yeah, yeah you were at this. I'm super
Speaker 2: close to Romulas. Cool, but I actually had breast cancer
Speaker 2: at the time. It was right after I was.
Speaker 5: Diagnosed.
Speaker 2: You came in February twenty three, so I couldn't go.
Speaker 1: Well hopefully I'll well, well, you know, I might do
Speaker 1: another tour in twenty twenty six. I'll try to come
Speaker 1: back to uh to Detroit's. Yeah, but anyway, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: was gonna say, yeah, I'm sure you see like people
Speaker 1: you clips or whatever. But yeah, like like I said,
Speaker 1: it didn't have to be it. It can be as
Speaker 1: labor intensive as you want it to be, or it
Speaker 1: could just be like a fun passion project that you
Speaker 1: do just because you want to talk to people. And
Speaker 1: I'm in that too a little bit because again, like
Speaker 1: this podcast, this version of the podcast, like taking phone
Speaker 1: calls and stuff is like, you know, my my business
Speaker 1: and career and whatnot. But like the the stuff that
Speaker 1: I do outside of this where I'm just chatting with
Speaker 1: people on the street is you know, I just do
Speaker 1: that because it's fun. Yeah, that's why sometimes I don't
Speaker 1: even post the episodes.
Speaker 2: Huh yeah, yeah, I like that idea. Yeah, I have
Speaker 2: all kinds of random stuff on my you tube channel.
Speaker 2: It started with horse training because I had a farm
Speaker 2: where I boarded and trained horses. So it's got some
Speaker 2: It's Equine Charm School. Drop the name.
Speaker 1: Oh hold on, yeah, okay, let's get another plug. Go
Speaker 1: and how do you spell equine e.
Speaker 2: Q U I n E.
Speaker 1: School charm school? Well, you know either way, I mean,
Speaker 1: I love the idea. I love Oh is it Kennedy
Speaker 1: Equine Center.
Speaker 2: Nope? No, Equine Charm School?
Speaker 1: Oh this is you Janet?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, wow, cool, cool, cool. Well, I love it. I
Speaker 1: think it's I think it's awesome. I'm I'm I'm I am,
Speaker 1: I am uh truly, I I am inspired by you
Speaker 1: continuing to at all states of your life reinvent yourself
Speaker 1: and try new things and do something that I think
Speaker 1: that's like the coolest fucking thing.
Speaker 2: Oh, definitely have done a lot of that, I'm sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did some traveling, did a lot of career changes,
Speaker 2: and yep, just keep moving forward.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I actually actually invented a device that made anesthetizing cats
Speaker 2: and rats in my safer for people and less stressful
Speaker 2: for the animal, but it just never took off. I
Speaker 2: put a lot of time and money into it, and eventually, finally,
Speaker 2: after like fifteen years, I finally dropped it. And I
Speaker 2: still have parts, like maybe I'll go back and do
Speaker 2: something with it.
Speaker 1: But yeah, what is anesthetizing?
Speaker 2: So putting to sleep for surgery?
Speaker 1: Oh oh oh oh you made you invented a thing
Speaker 1: that allows you to put mice to sleep so you
Speaker 1: can do surgery on them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it made it safer for people because the way
Speaker 2: they currently did it exposed people to a lot of
Speaker 2: the gas. You know how they put a face mask
Speaker 2: over your nose and tell you to breathe and you're
Speaker 2: breathing that gas. Well, in the research world.
Speaker 3: You have a box. It's a little box like.
Speaker 2: Five by eight size. You put a mouse in there
Speaker 2: and you fill it with the gas, and the mouse
Speaker 2: goes to sleep, and then you open the box and
Speaker 2: all that gas escapes into the air and you're breathing it,
Speaker 2: which is not good for you. So I came up
Speaker 2: with the way that sucked the gas out of the
Speaker 2: box before you opened it.
Speaker 1: M that's cool that they care enough about mice to
Speaker 1: sleep before.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, oh there's yeah, yeah. There's a lot of
Speaker 2: rules and regulations and oversight and and they're pretty you know, pretty,
Speaker 2: it's very well regulated.
Speaker 1: So that's not how I thought it was. I thought
Speaker 1: that they were just like I thought that I thought
Speaker 1: in general, the consensus in the scientific community was just
Speaker 1: fuck mice.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, it depends who you ask. I guess, I
Speaker 2: mean because and that's where I found my niche because scientists, biologists,
Speaker 2: you know, they know their research, they know they're a
Speaker 2: lot smarter than me in a lot of ways, but
Speaker 2: they don't know how to handle the mouth, and a
Speaker 2: lot of times they didn't have the respect for the animal.
Speaker 1: So I was.
Speaker 2: Able to go in and help them do things better,
Speaker 2: more respectful for the animal, and better for the animal,
Speaker 2: and safer for them, and help them, you know, past
Speaker 2: all the inspections and regulations and things like that.
Speaker 1: Nice nice, nice, nice. Well, I'm sorry to hear that. You're, uh,
Speaker 1: you got divorced from I mean, I don't you didn't
Speaker 1: even get divorced. You just I think the horse, well whatever, Actually,
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess he probably didn't know a lot
Speaker 1: because he's a horse, or maybe he knows horses no stuff. Sometimes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, they have good memories, for sure.
Speaker 1: Janet, Is there anything else you want to say to
Speaker 1: the people of the computer before we go.
Speaker 2: Yes, I would say that, uh, do you agree that
Speaker 2: animals sleep and they dream?
Speaker 1: Do I agree that animals dream? I think so?
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Like I've seen, uh, I got a Golden Retriever back
Speaker 1: home with my family and I've seen it have nightmares
Speaker 1: and ship.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like they're running and they were, so their unconscious
Speaker 2: mind is dreaming, right, So if they have an unconscious mind,
Speaker 2: they have a conscious mind. And if they have a
Speaker 2: conscious mind, they are pretty similar the way they think.
Speaker 2: There's a lot of differences, but they have feelings, they
Speaker 2: have consciousness.
Speaker 1: Well, thank God for for consciousness. I don't know why,
Speaker 1: but I.
Speaker 3: Said, no, you did well.
Speaker 1: Thank you very much, Janet.
Speaker 2: Awesome, thanks for calling.
Speaker 1: Have a good one all right, love you, love you too. Bye.
Speaker 5: Nah.
Speaker 1: People got they got people. Gotta be telling them I
Speaker 1: love them again. Ah. Fuck, I couldn't. I couldn't. I
Speaker 1: couldn't leave Janet on hold. I'm not but you know what, whatever, whatever,
Speaker 1: who cares about anything? Who cares about anything? I feel
Speaker 1: good right now. That was a nice converse issue with Janet.
Speaker 1: I feel good right now. I've been talking a lot
Speaker 1: about Uh. I think I've been talked a lot of
Speaker 1: the past few episodes about uh being in like a
Speaker 1: weird existential crisis state and the antidote to that. Besides
Speaker 1: you know, I mean fucking you know, I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: get on meds or whatever. But I think the antidote
Speaker 1: to that is like bringing yourself back to uh fucking
Speaker 1: reality by uh, like doing things, not giving your brain
Speaker 1: too much time to just fucking spiral. So I, yeah,
Speaker 1: feeling good. Hello, Hello, Hey, what's up man? How you
Speaker 1: doing good?
Speaker 4: Are you doing?
Speaker 1: H I'm actually doing pretty good.
Speaker 5: Uh.
Speaker 1: I haven't taken phone calls in like a week or two.
Speaker 1: I was just kind of focusing on like chilling out
Speaker 1: and stuff. And I'm actually I'm feeling pretty good. I
Speaker 1: feel very connected to reality in this very moment.
Speaker 4: That's good. You're sorry in Japan, right, Yeah.
Speaker 1: It was. I was in Japan for two months. I
Speaker 1: might go back. I have no I kind of don't
Speaker 1: really know what I'm gonna do with my life moving forward,
Speaker 1: but yeah, I might go back. It was a great time.
Speaker 1: It was a great time. It's interesting being back in
Speaker 1: New York. It's a different vibe, but there is it
Speaker 1: is nice to be in a place where you speak
Speaker 1: the language and you feel a little bit more like
Speaker 1: you belong there in some sense. But yeah, man, that's
Speaker 1: that's what's up with me? What's up with you? Sir?
Speaker 4: Oh goodness, sorry, I'm like very nervous. I know, the
Speaker 4: lowest sikes thing I'll ever do. I've just I've just
Speaker 4: been calling for a while. I've been listening to you
Speaker 4: for a while. You got me through a very rough breakup,
Speaker 4: So thank you for that. Cool cool, yeah, yeah, but
Speaker 4: right now, let's see just like, well what I want
Speaker 4: to talk about kind of.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sure, sure, I mean any anything, man, I'm not
Speaker 1: I'm not pressed. Well yeah, yeah, go ahead, go ahead,
Speaker 1: go ahead.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean I've been listening to you
Speaker 4: and when one reason I really resonate with you is
Speaker 4: because you're you went to school for film, uh, and
Speaker 4: so have I. I'm in Denver right now, I've got
Speaker 4: a film degree, and I'm kind of just like I'm
Speaker 4: so back and forth between I got something I can
Speaker 4: do something with this, and also like it's a waste
Speaker 4: of my time. Sometimes I'll just kind of feel like
Speaker 4: an idiot because I do a little comedy sketches, you know,
Speaker 4: and there's such a back and forth between I really
Speaker 4: got something here, I gotta keep trying, or you know,
Speaker 4: it's time to do something else.
Speaker 1: Okay, When you well, yeah, I'm I'm curious about a
Speaker 1: few things. When you say I really got something here,
Speaker 1: what does that mean? What do you feel like you've got?
Speaker 4: I feel like I got to create a bone, you know.
Speaker 4: I feel like I can't be doing anything but creating. Yeah.
Speaker 4: I love comedy. I love sketch comedy. I love everything
Speaker 4: about it. And every time I'm like filming something, I
Speaker 4: create something. There's no other feeling like that for me.
Speaker 4: It's it's Yeah, it's such a great feeling to really
Speaker 4: have something out there that's like mine.
Speaker 1: I don't know, so uh if you really so, I
Speaker 1: guess what's the dilemma here? Is like are you is it?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: You know, here's here's the thing. And I'll go on
Speaker 1: a little bit of a spiel. Is it like dreaming
Speaker 1: of being able to do it for money?
Speaker 4: That's also the struggle because like, I just posted something
Speaker 4: on YouTube. I just revamped everything. It's like my first
Speaker 4: video up there, and I know it's such a stupid
Speaker 4: thing to post something and hope for views and like attention,
Speaker 4: because that's kind of what it's all about. But at
Speaker 4: the same time, if I'm not posting stuff because I
Speaker 4: like it and it's authentic to me, then there's no point.
Speaker 4: But I I feel so driven by like by views
Speaker 4: and not same but like like a following and yeah,
Speaker 4: you want.
Speaker 1: People to see it. Yeah, if you're gonna work hard
Speaker 1: on something, yeah you want people to see it.
Speaker 4: Yeah exactly, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: How long you've been doing this for? So?
Speaker 4: I mean, I it all started because I was on
Speaker 4: decided coming into college, and so was it like my
Speaker 4: sophomore year of college. I was like, I have no
Speaker 4: fucking clue what I want to do. And then there's
Speaker 4: film club, you know, and then I made Uh, I
Speaker 4: pitched my idea and we made it. It's like a
Speaker 4: film noir stoner murder mystery and our bond gets murdered.
Speaker 4: So that that was super fun and I just really
Speaker 4: fell in love with it from there, and so I
Speaker 4: kind of been on and off, but right now I'm
Speaker 4: trying to be more consistent with it. But yeah, that's
Speaker 4: whet started with me. And right now I'm at I
Speaker 4: got like a few videos in my stockpile, and I'm
Speaker 4: trying to upload weekly.
Speaker 1: Are you uh, you just graduate from college? Like, are
Speaker 1: you like twenty two?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm twenty two, but I got my last quarter
Speaker 4: here coming up, so I'm about to graduate, and it's
Speaker 4: been freaking me out.
Speaker 1: It's freaking you out about it.
Speaker 4: It's just I feel like I'm very reliant on my
Speaker 4: parents still, and it's kind of like leaving college, especially
Speaker 4: going into something that's like intense, as like film, trying
Speaker 4: to break into that because you've got to be NonStop
Speaker 4: and relentless, you know, you gotta be able to take
Speaker 4: it on the chin. And sometimes I worry about having
Speaker 4: that just thought I've been having. It's like that hunger
Speaker 4: almost if that makes sense, like really being hungry for
Speaker 4: it and if it's yeah, but it's sometimes I'm sitting
Speaker 4: there and it's I struggle with being productive and doing
Speaker 4: things I want to do, and sometimes I'm like, am
Speaker 4: I hungry? That's something that some people just have and
Speaker 4: some people don't or do I have to tap into it?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've wondered that too. I Mean some people are
Speaker 1: just like it's it's interesting sometimes you like see other
Speaker 1: people and you just have this image in your brain
Speaker 1: that like something in their fucking like brain chemistry allows
Speaker 1: them to like flawlessly, with zero resistance do things, and
Speaker 1: you get a little bit jealous. You're like, well, fucking
Speaker 1: I wish that my brain worked that way, and I don't.
Speaker 1: It's interesting because I do actually believe that some people
Speaker 1: are just wired fucking differently than other people. But with
Speaker 1: with the stuff that you're telling me, now that I've like,
Speaker 1: I'm from a place of like, oh, I've run the
Speaker 1: gamut of like, uh, you know, having a following and
Speaker 1: all that stuff is like, well do you do do
Speaker 1: you stand up or do you do anything? Like in person?
Speaker 4: I don't do anything in person, which I've been really
Speaker 4: I need to get my uh what do they call it?
Speaker 4: The five minute stand up? There was it? Quote? Again,
Speaker 4: I don't know, but I've been like wanting to get
Speaker 4: into it, you know, but I gotta like sit down
Speaker 4: and write an act.
Speaker 1: Are you are you gonna stay in Denver? Like is
Speaker 1: that where you grew up?
Speaker 4: I I grew up in Virginia. Okay, Yeah, I came
Speaker 4: out to Denver for school and just kind of shows
Speaker 4: film out here after the fact. But yeah, Denver has
Speaker 4: a pretty good stand up scene.
Speaker 1: Yeah, are you. Are you planning to hang out in Denver?
Speaker 1: Are you gonna try to go to like l A.
Speaker 1: Are you gonna go back to Virginia? Are you just
Speaker 1: kind of gonna go wherever you can find a job?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: See that that's another thing. This is why I like
Speaker 4: the whole graduating costs. It's like freaking me out because
Speaker 4: I got nothing planned out. You know, I'm trying to
Speaker 4: think like I can if like I am uploading these
Speaker 4: YouTube videos and I have my like group of friends
Speaker 4: out here who help me out, I'd stay here and
Speaker 4: keep doing that and work a job.
Speaker 1: Do you friends your friends out there in Denver?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 4: I got lots of good friends right here.
Speaker 1: And and do you make videos with them?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: You know, so I have a lot. I have a
Speaker 1: lot of thoughts about your situation. Actually, I have a
Speaker 1: lot of thoughts.
Speaker 4: I'd love to hear them.
Speaker 1: What I would say is that, first of all, the
Speaker 1: fact that you're like a young guy and you have
Speaker 1: friends that want to make videos with you, please please understand,
Speaker 1: please understand this that having a following is great and all,
Speaker 1: but having a being like a young guy and having
Speaker 1: a group of like other young folks and you're together
Speaker 1: making videos and you're having fun whatever you do through
Speaker 1: your attempts at trying to be viral and trying to
Speaker 1: have a following. Still, you know, there's a lot of like,
Speaker 1: you know, we could sit here and do business class
Speaker 1: and I could say things like, you know, you have
Speaker 1: to kind of make content in the context of short
Speaker 1: short form video, and the way that they kind of
Speaker 1: teach you to make stuff in film school is completely
Speaker 1: antithetical to how things work in the real world. And
Speaker 1: those are all things you should be thinking about and whatever,
Speaker 1: and you should still be striving to have a following.
Speaker 1: But just please the fact that you've got a good
Speaker 1: group of friends and you guys are making videos together
Speaker 1: and you're talking about jokes and you're laughing, and maybe
Speaker 1: you get into the stand up scene in Denver or
Speaker 1: the sketch scene in Denver, and you work, you're fucking
Speaker 1: whatever thing you need to do to make money during
Speaker 1: the day, and you're hanging out with your friends making
Speaker 1: stuff at night, revel in how much fucking fun that is.
Speaker 1: You know, don't be too don't be too like if
Speaker 1: you get don't be too hung up on like, oh,
Speaker 1: I gotta get out of my day job, like, you know,
Speaker 1: if you got to fucking go wait tables or be
Speaker 1: a barista or whatever and live in a thing with
Speaker 1: like five other dudes. You know, just at least for
Speaker 1: right now, just just revel and how fucking fun that is.
Speaker 1: Like you, you just are in such a position to
Speaker 1: just have so much fun, you know, regardless of how
Speaker 1: many people like are seeing the shit and you it's
Speaker 1: still it's good to I think, be ambitious and to
Speaker 1: be like, Okay, that didn't work. Maybe we try it
Speaker 1: like this, and maybe you scroll on TikTok one night
Speaker 1: and you're like, oh, this person's doing it like that.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'll try something like that, like just if anything.
Speaker 1: But the thing I want you to know is like
Speaker 1: revel in the joy of the process of where your
Speaker 1: life is at right now, because from where I sit,
Speaker 1: your life seems really cool and fun, you know, to
Speaker 1: have again to confidence and have a group of friends
Speaker 1: that want to make this videos with you, and to
Speaker 1: be in a place like Denver where it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: it's not as cut throat and fucking like you know,
Speaker 1: brutally expensive and vast and expansive as as you know
Speaker 1: in La or in New York, or whatever, But there's
Speaker 1: still so many I don't know exactly what the comedy
Speaker 1: scene is, like their shout out to what is it?
Speaker 1: The comedy comedy work, Shout out comedy work. I love
Speaker 1: the comedy Works.
Speaker 4: You got the comedy just going there tonight?
Speaker 1: Oh who you seeing Josh Oh cool cool, shout out
Speaker 1: the Comedy Works. That's one of my favorite comedy clubs
Speaker 1: in the country. It's a great place. But like, dude,
Speaker 1: go do the open mic at the comedy works. Go
Speaker 1: explore the old scene. Go start a sketch show at
Speaker 1: some fucking bar, Go do right your five minutes and
Speaker 1: get into the thing, and your friends go with you.
Speaker 1: Like I don't know, Just dude, Like you know, here's
Speaker 1: the thing being having a following, and like you know,
Speaker 1: it's it's, it's it's good, it's it's it's a good
Speaker 1: thing to strive for. But just the where you are
Speaker 1: right now is just so fun and you should just
Speaker 1: like enjoy the fun of it and enjoy the process
Speaker 1: of it. Because here's the thing. If you're not enjoying
Speaker 1: the process of it, right, it's like it's not gonna
Speaker 1: change suddenly once you have twenty four thousand TikTok followers
Speaker 1: or whatever the fuck. So, I don't know, I'm excited
Speaker 1: about your life. I think it's you know, if that
Speaker 1: if that's helpful, if that makes you feel better in
Speaker 1: any way, shape or form. You know, I think you're
Speaker 1: entering actually a very fun and exciting time, you know,
Speaker 1: where you're in a community and you're in this thing
Speaker 1: with your friends. I think it's cool. So that's that's
Speaker 1: my I don't know if that's advice, that's just my
Speaker 1: that's my perspective on your situation.
Speaker 4: No, that's I mean, that's really just they you know,
Speaker 4: if I if I spend my time going after the following,
Speaker 4: because that's just kind of a byproduct, like you said,
Speaker 4: just spending time with your friend, you know, doing doing
Speaker 4: like something you love so much. And I'm just like recently,
Speaker 4: I'm just so strung tight, you know, really anxious about
Speaker 4: everything going on, when I could just really kind of
Speaker 4: and enjoy what I'm doing because I didn't really think
Speaker 4: about it, like you said, Because even if I have
Speaker 4: to wait tables or whatever, I get to like, you know,
Speaker 4: twenty two, I'm young, and I get to go out
Speaker 4: there and do all that stuff, and it's just yeah,
Speaker 4: it's just figuring that out without like I don't know,
Speaker 4: I say, the anxiety of it all just kind of
Speaker 4: gets to me and it kind of kind of it
Speaker 4: can take away from that.
Speaker 1: Lot is the is the anxiety? Is the anxiety about?
Speaker 1: I mean, I know it's about a lot of things,
Speaker 1: but like if you had to pick it apart, you know,
Speaker 1: what's it about?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean definitely recently it's been what the hell
Speaker 4: am I doing after college?
Speaker 1: Huh?
Speaker 4: Because I mean there's just god, there's just so much.
Speaker 4: I've been going back and forth on.
Speaker 1: Yeah, go ahead, what are the options?
Speaker 4: Yeah? I mean right now, I mean I'm graduating with
Speaker 4: just a film degree, and I know how you feel
Speaker 4: about film degrees, and I'm like, I'm trying to figure
Speaker 4: out if I go back to school and get a
Speaker 4: second degree for a.
Speaker 1: Second and get a second degree for what?
Speaker 4: Right Well, I was thinking like going back to marketing
Speaker 4: and then I could do something with like commercials or
Speaker 4: production commercials stuff like that, but then like exactly for what?
Speaker 4: And then it's just kind of like a is it
Speaker 4: a split focus thing if I go back and get
Speaker 4: a second degree, or should I just like graduate with
Speaker 4: my film degree? And run with it, you know, yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean are you are you no shame in it?
Speaker 1: By the way, but are your parents helping out or
Speaker 1: would you go into more debt?
Speaker 4: No, my parents are helping me.
Speaker 1: All right, all right, I mean another I'm not I'm
Speaker 1: personally not a fan of like getting another degree, especially
Speaker 1: if it's like if you want to go I mean look, yeah, like,
Speaker 1: well are you thinking like you're going to go like
Speaker 1: be a PA or something?
Speaker 4: Uh goodness. So, I mean I I've talked to people
Speaker 4: in the industry and because I like directing and writing
Speaker 4: my sketches, and then they're always like, if if you
Speaker 4: go in and be a PA, you're gonna be stuck
Speaker 4: in the kind of the crew side of things. So
Speaker 4: like they're saying, go work at an agency. Was there
Speaker 4: a suggestion, what kind of interesting like an acting agency?
Speaker 1: Oh okay, it's not a horrible idea.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because they're like, the only thing you need is
Speaker 4: is like grassroots connections, so you go work at one
Speaker 4: of those. And she was like, don't go to grad school,
Speaker 4: go work here that you'll learn everything you need to know.
Speaker 1: I don't. I also don't. I also don't love the
Speaker 1: idea of a second degree.
Speaker 4: Yeah, why do you say that?
Speaker 1: I'm curious, well, cause like what do you? What do you?
Speaker 1: I guess I just don't nothing you've said that you
Speaker 1: aspire to do. Requires If you told me that you
Speaker 1: wanted to do biology research, I'd be like, yeah, you
Speaker 1: need a second degree. Or if you told me you
Speaker 1: wanted to be a lawyer, I'd be like, yeah, you
Speaker 1: need a second degree. But it being like you've said
Speaker 1: nothing where that makes me feel like you need to
Speaker 1: go get a second degree.
Speaker 4: Yeah. I think I'm almost like preemptively planning my failure
Speaker 4: if that makes sense. Oh sure, I'm kind of like
Speaker 4: making a fall black plan. I was even thinking of
Speaker 4: going back again, like like a teacher certificate, so I
Speaker 4: could do that.
Speaker 1: While I'm like, yeah, but you could. You can always
Speaker 1: do that later, you know. I don't know if I'm again,
Speaker 1: if I'm, if I'm you, I'm I'm like, uh okay,
Speaker 1: I'll do whatever thing to make money. And if it's
Speaker 1: film adjacent, then great. PA work sucks ass though, And
Speaker 1: it's not gonna if you because if you're if you're
Speaker 1: a PA, then you're gonna be like, by the way,
Speaker 1: just for the listeners, I know, that, uh, this conversation
Speaker 1: might be alienating to ninety nine percent of people, but
Speaker 1: rarely do I feel it's it's f funny because sometimes
Speaker 1: people will ask me for advice on stuff and I'll
Speaker 1: be like, I don't know what the fuck to say,
Speaker 1: but this, being twenty two and graduating from film school,
Speaker 1: I'm like this, I feel actually genuinely very primed to
Speaker 1: give advice about this, So I'm that's why this conversation
Speaker 1: has lasted so long. But anyway, Uh, you know, yeah, Pa,
Speaker 1: work would suck because you don't want to be in
Speaker 1: some job that's like, you don't want to be in
Speaker 1: some job that's like eighty fucking hours a week, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean? Like, yeah, do some shit that's
Speaker 1: like if it's industry adjacent, then great, but if it's
Speaker 1: just some fucking bullshit nine to five marketing job in Denver,
Speaker 1: and like at night you can go out and do
Speaker 1: stand up and make sketches with your friends. Like again,
Speaker 1: I think that you can have a fun, cool life.
Speaker 1: You can have a fun, cool early twenties doing that.
Speaker 1: I really do think that's it's it's fun to I
Speaker 1: don't know. Again, I don't know exactly what's going on
Speaker 1: in the Denver scene. But there's something going on, and
Speaker 1: you know, you can build locally by again having sketch showcases,
Speaker 1: and if you have a bunch of friends there, that's great.
Speaker 1: I mean, you know, by the way, like when you're
Speaker 1: saying like because you said to me, you were like, oh,
Speaker 1: I really got something, you know what I mean. The
Speaker 1: potential of being able to make a living or the
Speaker 1: fleshing out of the thing that you feel like you've
Speaker 1: got is not going to happen in your day job.
Speaker 1: It's gonna happen on the internet, and it's gonna happen
Speaker 1: when you're hanging out with your friends talking about comedy
Speaker 1: and making jokes and doing things in the physical Denver scene.
Speaker 1: So I don't I really just wouldn't stress out about
Speaker 1: your day job that much, you know, I mean, I
Speaker 1: wouldn't stress out about any of this stuff that much
Speaker 1: because again I would just be reveling in the fun
Speaker 1: of it, because it is such a it is a
Speaker 1: joyous thing I think to be a part to have
Speaker 1: a community of friends and people who you can work
Speaker 1: on this kind of stuff with. So that's what that's
Speaker 1: That's okay, that's the baseline. I would go at this
Speaker 1: from it's like, I'm having fun making stuff with my friends,
Speaker 1: and I'm making enough money that I can live on
Speaker 1: my own without my parents' help. And then on top
Speaker 1: of that, and then on top of that, you can
Speaker 1: go like what's best for the algorithm or you know,
Speaker 1: whatever the fuck. But so that's that's that's all I
Speaker 1: really have to say.
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I mean, yeah, that makes perfect sense. And
Speaker 4: right now I'm trying to figure out how to just
Speaker 4: relax a little bit, you know, yeah, yeah that should
Speaker 4: go well. But yeah, you you inspired partly. I think
Speaker 4: you subconsciously inspired the sketch I just uploaded. It's a
Speaker 4: guy in a frog costume. It looks a lot like
Speaker 4: the geck across the Magic frog Man.
Speaker 1: The Magic frog Man.
Speaker 4: I love it, The Magic Man.
Speaker 1: I love it. I love it. I feel I feel
Speaker 1: like a magic frog Man every day. That's not even
Speaker 1: really are what's your name again? Pierce? Yeah, Pierce, Pierce,
Speaker 1: great talking to you, Piers. I'm again if it makes
Speaker 1: I hope it makes you feel better. I hope it
Speaker 1: makes you feel better too that I'm sitting here and
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, this guy sounds like he's in a
Speaker 1: fun adventure.
Speaker 4: Yeah, totally. I mean also makes me feel better seeing
Speaker 4: someone as like creative as you making it. You know
Speaker 4: that always helps.
Speaker 1: Well, thanks man, I appreciate your kind words. Is there
Speaker 1: anything else you want to say to the people of
Speaker 1: the computer before we go?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Would you be cool with me shouting out my
Speaker 4: YouTube channel? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Go ahead, go ahead.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's a dumpster champagne. One word.
Speaker 1: Hold let me, I'm gonna audit. You hold on dumpster champagne, Yeah,
Speaker 1: dumpster sham pain? How fuck do you spell champagne? Hold on?
Speaker 4: I know, right?
Speaker 1: How the fuck? Hold on? Dump dumpster?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 1: Campaign a right? Dumpster said? How do you fucking spell
Speaker 1: this again?
Speaker 4: C h A MP? Oh my god? Wait yeah, oh wait,
Speaker 4: I got it, I got it, got it?
Speaker 1: Okay the magic frog man. Okay, here you go. This
Speaker 1: is you. You look? Why what is this? A? Is
Speaker 1: this a mug shot?
Speaker 4: Okay? So funny, funny story. I was trying to get
Speaker 4: into Uh there's like a school trip to India and
Speaker 4: I had to get a visa, but I didn't have
Speaker 4: like a passport photo. So I showed up like like
Speaker 4: ten minutes late to my passport photo picture. They maybe
Speaker 4: put on that like the purple shirt, and then they
Speaker 4: took that picture and I wasn't allowed into India. Actually,
Speaker 4: they wouldn't let me in.
Speaker 1: Oh ship, do you have to wait? Do you the way? Wait?
Speaker 1: Do you show up at the airport and they sent
Speaker 1: you back?
Speaker 4: No. I was trying to apply for a visa. I
Speaker 4: literally went to the embassy in DC and they denied
Speaker 4: me like four times.
Speaker 1: Well they don't want fuck them, fuck them all. I
Speaker 1: don't just never mind. All right, man, have a good
Speaker 1: rest of the night. Pre al right.
Speaker 4: I love you, Ba, you.
Speaker 1: Know, like I said, I know I alienated a lot
Speaker 1: of I know that was a I know that was
Speaker 1: an inside baseball kind of a call. But you know again,
Speaker 1: it's like that's a bit of the perspective I think
Speaker 1: I've gained over the years of doing this, and because
Speaker 1: I spent some time in like a local comedy scene
Speaker 1: when I was in college and whatnot. Is like it's
Speaker 1: just fun. Like I think you forget that you always
Speaker 1: when you're like doing things and you're kind of trying
Speaker 1: to make a living doing it or trying to make
Speaker 1: a name for yourself or a following or whatever, you
Speaker 1: kind of forget that, Like oh this is supposed to
Speaker 1: be fun, you know, but good luck, Pierce. Hey for real, Hey, Hey, Hey,
Speaker 1: what's uh? What's that? What's your name?
Speaker 5: My name is a little bit hard to pronounce, but
Speaker 5: I hope you try your best.
Speaker 1: It's moaz moiz mois what's up? Where are you calling from?
Speaker 5: I'm from Germany. Actually, well I was born and raised
Speaker 5: in Syria, but I've been living here for the good
Speaker 5: part of nine months. So nine months, nine years I meant, sorry,
Speaker 5: so yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay, nine years from Syria. I've been living in Germany
Speaker 1: for nine years.
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly, Yeah.
Speaker 1: Cool Man's what's happening with you?
Speaker 5: Well, I'm going to be completely real with you. It's
Speaker 5: around eleven pm right now, and I was feeling incredibly
Speaker 5: lonely and a little bit depressed, and I got a
Speaker 5: notification that your stream started, and yeah, I've been listening
Speaker 5: to your show for the past few years now three years,
Speaker 5: I guess, since the pandemic cool or actually, yeah, the
Speaker 5: pandemic is now five years ago. Yeah, a long time listener,
Speaker 5: first time caller to guess. Definitely a big sound of
Speaker 5: the show man to guess.
Speaker 1: Thank you, sir. Great to hear from you. What's as
Speaker 1: your Uh yeah, I'm familiar with eleven PM loneliness depression
Speaker 1: for sure. What's uh? I mean, well, it's you know
Speaker 1: what's funny is I've been thinking a lot, Like I
Speaker 1: was about to ask what was on your mind? And
Speaker 1: then I was kind of like, you know what's funny
Speaker 1: is I'm really I've talked about this on the podcast before,
Speaker 1: probably recently, but like I'm really torn between like it
Speaker 1: is the cure for depression or whatever? Is it like
Speaker 1: talking through your problems or is it distracting yourself from
Speaker 1: your problems? And you know, I don't know, I haven't
Speaker 1: come to an internal consensus on that, but well let
Speaker 1: me ask you are you feeling? Are you feeling a
Speaker 1: talk through or a distraction?
Speaker 5: I'm actually more on team distraction, so to be honest
Speaker 5: with you, yeah, because you know, in the last few years,
Speaker 5: whenever I listened to your podcast, kind of an afterthought
Speaker 5: that I have is what would I want to talk
Speaker 5: to you about whenever I eventually make it, And so
Speaker 5: what I always thought about was telling you about, you know,
Speaker 5: the last nine years of my life and what I've
Speaker 5: done with them since I've came to Germany. If you
Speaker 5: would be interested in hearing that. I would be more
Speaker 5: you know than glad to tell you all.
Speaker 1: About it you're here or hit me.
Speaker 5: So, like I said, I was born and raised in Syria,
Speaker 5: and we came around here twenty sixteen with my family,
Speaker 5: so we're war refugees basically, and since then a lot
Speaker 5: has happened. I mean, I was seventeen years old at
Speaker 5: the time. I didn't speak any German or anything like that.
Speaker 5: But my parents were the typical immigrant parents, so you know,
Speaker 5: they wanted us to succeed as fast as we could
Speaker 5: and as hard as we could sort of say. And
Speaker 5: so I went directly to a high school at the
Speaker 5: time and managed to get my diploma within the normal
Speaker 5: range three years. And after that there were way too
Speaker 5: many options open for me, so to say. And for
Speaker 5: the longest time, actually, I was really interested in video games,
Speaker 5: you know, playing video games and how they're made and
Speaker 5: all that, and so I was definitely interested in studying,
Speaker 5: you know, game development. However, in Germany, and I guess
Speaker 5: all over the world most likely, that is not something
Speaker 5: offered in public universities or public colleges community colleges as
Speaker 5: they call them in the US. I guess, and so
Speaker 5: it was a privilege that I didn't have at the time,
Speaker 5: and so I decided to study computer science instead, and
Speaker 5: just last year I managed to finish my bachelor's degree.
Speaker 5: And yeah, I have to say, man, it's been an
Speaker 5: insane journey. A lot has happened. Last year in particular,
Speaker 5: has been you know, an incredible milestone. I managed to
Speaker 5: finally get my German citizenship, I landed my very first
Speaker 5: you know, big corporate job, like I said, graduated UNI
Speaker 5: and everything. And I guess this year is starting off
Speaker 5: a little bit slower because there's not much going on anymore,
Speaker 5: and there's no goal to chase, if you know what
Speaker 5: I mean. And so I guess all this emptiness is
Speaker 5: kind of coming from that. Like ever since we came
Speaker 5: to this kind of new country, there's always been something
Speaker 5: to chase and something to run after. But this year,
Speaker 5: in particular, there's not been anything to motivate me to
Speaker 5: you know, do more or like there's no new milestone
Speaker 5: to catch up to.
Speaker 4: Does that make sense?
Speaker 1: It makes eight thousand sense. But why and forgive me
Speaker 1: if you explained this already, but why is it that
Speaker 1: this year specifically, there's nothing to go after.
Speaker 5: Well, you know, ever since we were here, I had
Speaker 5: either school or college, and there was always something for
Speaker 5: me to work towards, whether that's you know, finishing school
Speaker 5: or finishing college. But ever since I landed my job,
Speaker 5: I basically try to live for the weekend, and whenever
Speaker 5: I am at the weekend, there's kind of this dread of, oh,
Speaker 5: the week is about to start again, and I'm losing
Speaker 5: time and I'm not doing another and all of that.
Speaker 5: Even though please don't get me wrong, I love my job.
Speaker 5: My job is, you know, everything that I've ever dreamed
Speaker 5: of and more. But it's still, you know, forty hours
Speaker 5: a week. You still spend more time at work than
Speaker 5: with your friends or family, And so I feel like
Speaker 5: life is passing me by a little bit. I guess, yeah,
Speaker 5: I don't know. Some it's like that in that realm,
Speaker 5: more or less, we're around the same age. By the way,
Speaker 5: I think, I'm like, I don't think i'm twenty six.
Speaker 5: I think you're twenty seven. I'm not sure, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 5: but yeah, m m.
Speaker 1: Well, so you say that life is passing you by
Speaker 1: and that you don't have any like things to go after,
Speaker 1: and by the way, I'm having like a similar thing.
Speaker 1: Not to push it back to me, but like you know,
Speaker 1: I'm having a bit of a similar thing going on.
Speaker 1: I'm curious when you say that, like, don't you get
Speaker 1: to kind of decide for yourself if you have any
Speaker 1: things you want to push towards and in that sense,
Speaker 1: like do you not have any other goals or any
Speaker 1: other like things that you want to do.
Speaker 4: Now that's a good question.
Speaker 5: I mean I try to think about that around Christmas time,
Speaker 5: kind of setting my New Year's resolutions or goals for
Speaker 5: the coming year, and I was only able to think
Speaker 5: of really long term stuff like, for example, I'm single
Speaker 5: at a time being, and so I was trying to
Speaker 5: maybe get back into the dating world or maybe try
Speaker 5: out new hobbies and all of that. And then I
Speaker 5: was thinking about stuff even more long term, like eventually
Speaker 5: buying a house or some sort of property. But that's
Speaker 5: not something you know, realistic in the next few years.
Speaker 5: But I have to some extent try to stick to
Speaker 5: those goals, you know, trying out new stuff of new hobbies,
Speaker 5: for example, magic the gathering. Actually, even though I'm not
Speaker 5: that big of a of a card game guy, I
Speaker 5: want I went to a local tournament recently, and it
Speaker 5: was it was pretty fun, even though a little bit
Speaker 5: scary and a little bit intimidating. But uh yeah, but
Speaker 5: you know, like you said, at the end of the day,
Speaker 5: it's like eleven pm, I'm sitting here and talking to
Speaker 5: a guy with a on in a get go suit
Speaker 5: on the internet.
Speaker 1: It's true. It's true. It's true.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I've been thinking about this for myself a lot
Speaker 1: of like how do I because I have a weird
Speaker 1: obsession with like I you know, I kind of snapped
Speaker 1: recently and was thinking about how short life is, and
Speaker 1: like I want to be doing something every day to
Speaker 1: make it so that uh my, I was like, how
Speaker 1: am I gonna make make it so that at twenty seven,
Speaker 1: like when I'm thirty, like my life feels like it's
Speaker 1: progressing forward, you know, and then like what does that
Speaker 1: look like? Does that look like some radical action or
Speaker 1: does that look like doing some shit for an hour
Speaker 1: a day?
Speaker 4: You know?
Speaker 1: And so I don't know. I guess it's like you, yeah,
Speaker 1: these long term goals, it's like how do you break
Speaker 1: them up into like some shit that you can do
Speaker 1: every day or every week or you know, like how
Speaker 1: do you make shit manageable, right, and like, what do
Speaker 1: you want yourself to look like in you know, X
Speaker 1: amount of years? You know, do you want to learn
Speaker 1: French or whatever? The fuck? And like yeah, how do you?
Speaker 5: Oh god know, yeah.
Speaker 1: Like how do you how do you progress? How do
Speaker 1: you move life forward? It's an interesting question. It's a
Speaker 1: conundrum I'm dealing with myself, and I don't know. I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't know. I'm just trying to like
Speaker 1: fucking pick something and do it and keep it going.
Speaker 5: No, you don't have to worry about that, man, I mean,
Speaker 5: I guess it's at least comforting to know we're all
Speaker 5: in the same boat.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, of course you can't. Yeah, you can never
Speaker 1: get out of it. You can never escape. I thought
Speaker 1: I could rest on my laurels for a little bit,
Speaker 1: because that's what happened is I was like, Okay, I was,
Speaker 1: I did this successful thing, and I can just rest
Speaker 1: on that. And there is a lot of I'm not
Speaker 1: I would be lying if I said there was zero
Speaker 1: comfort in that. But I also I also I was
Speaker 1: talking to my friends the other day. No, it was
Speaker 1: like with my friend last night, and I was like, man,
Speaker 1: I don't want to be like, you know, thirty eight
Speaker 1: years old, ten years from now and being like, you know,
Speaker 1: I used to be the therapy gecko. You know what
Speaker 1: I mean. I gotta like keep figuring out shit to do.
Speaker 1: You know, your life never it never lets up funny,
Speaker 1: you know, I mean even even sorry, like.
Speaker 5: A forty year old gecko, a fourty year old geck
Speaker 5: is pretty funny, you have to admit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean who who knows? But I mean even
Speaker 1: like our our caller from earlier, uh Janet, I mean
Speaker 1: she's sixty and she's was we were talking and she
Speaker 1: was like, yeah, I have plans and I have ideas
Speaker 1: and I have you know, things I want to do,
Speaker 1: and it's like, you know, it never ends. But that's
Speaker 1: like that's good, right because once you you don't want
Speaker 1: to be done, that's when you're just gonna wither if
Speaker 1: that happens. I don't know if anything I've been saying
Speaker 1: is relevant to any to what you were talking about.
Speaker 4: But.
Speaker 5: No, no, man, I told guess what you mean. This
Speaker 5: actually kind of reminds me of you know, the sissifs meme,
Speaker 5: the guy that's pushing the rock up the hill. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I guess we're all kind of in that motion, and
Speaker 5: you have to you have to imagine SIPs enjoying his
Speaker 5: his his journey.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 5: It's not about the goal, it's about enjoying every day,
Speaker 5: enjoying pushing up that boulder.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a way. It's a weird balancing act, right,
Speaker 1: because you want to just enjoy fucking life as it is.
Speaker 1: You want to be able to go see a movie
Speaker 1: without hating yourself, but you also wanna, you know, keep
Speaker 1: moving things forward. And everyone's brain is wired so differently,
Speaker 1: Like some people just genuinely don't Some people genuinely are
Speaker 1: very happy to just like not do anything and that's great.
Speaker 1: And other people are wired in this weird way where
Speaker 1: they're like, I have you know, I have to do
Speaker 1: shit or else I will go insane. And it is
Speaker 1: probably something to be said about understanding your own wiring
Speaker 1: and making plays towards it. Man, it's so fun how
Speaker 1: it's so funny how I think about these things when
Speaker 1: I'm like talking about them to other people on my podcast,
Speaker 1: versus when I am alone and depressed at eleven pm
Speaker 1: on Reddit looking for answers of some kind. You know,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to watch less motivational content.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I've I've found myself recently looking I'm like
Speaker 1: looking for answers, whether it's like on the Internet or
Speaker 1: from other people or whatever. And part of me throws
Speaker 1: up my fucking hands after. I like after, because supid Instagram. Right,
Speaker 1: you look at one motivational thing and then it's and
Speaker 1: then all of a sudden, now like it's everything. You
Speaker 1: know that it just keeps showing you and showing you,
Speaker 1: and I'm I'm like, the answer, I'm like, this tweet
Speaker 1: is not going to have the answer.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: The answer is first of all, there might just not
Speaker 1: be an answer A and you have to accept that.
Speaker 1: And then second of all, the answer is going to
Speaker 1: be within my own stupid balls. So I got to
Speaker 1: look there and not on Reddit.
Speaker 5: I guess, well, will you will you let me know
Speaker 5: if you find something in there.
Speaker 1: I will let you know if I find something that's
Speaker 1: helpful in my balls for you.
Speaker 5: Well, I actually wanted to say when you were on
Speaker 5: your on your Instagram thing. I love the hope core
Speaker 5: videos on TikTok. You know, the slide shows. Those always
Speaker 5: it for me.
Speaker 4: Sometimes they're stupid.
Speaker 5: Sometimes there's just full of dark soul memes, but you know,
Speaker 5: they hit the spot most of the time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know, I like those too. I like those two.
Speaker 1: I think I'm just I'm at a point now where
Speaker 1: I'm just fed up with like, you know, at what
Speaker 1: point do I am? I? Like, you know, I trust
Speaker 1: myself enough that I don't need it. But maybe that's
Speaker 1: not true. Maybe that's bad. Actually, maybe it's good to
Speaker 1: be constantly trying to learn from other people and other things.
Speaker 1: And you know, I mean that's one of the fun
Speaker 1: things about doing this podcast is uh, I'm constantly getting
Speaker 1: to like learn from other people, and then I get
Speaker 1: to share that with other people too, so you know,
Speaker 1: it's cool. Yeah, let me think what enoy you.
Speaker 5: Know, as a watcher and a listener for a long time.
Speaker 4: Sorry, no far, you go ahead, I was gonna say anything, Okay, I.
Speaker 5: Was gonna say I was gonna that as a long
Speaker 5: time listener.
Speaker 4: Uh, you know, for the past few years.
Speaker 5: It's actually also very clear that about actually very clear
Speaker 5: how much you're learning about yourself in the in the
Speaker 5: whole process. You seem to, you know, kind of more
Speaker 5: and more share stuff about yourself and it's kind of
Speaker 5: you know, it makes the whole thing a little bit
Speaker 5: more authentic. You know, I know you're this is awn
Speaker 5: entertainment thing or whatever, but it still, you know, gives
Speaker 5: off a vibe of authenticity, which I think most listeners
Speaker 5: connect very well to.
Speaker 4: And I think.
Speaker 5: That's a part of why the show is so successful,
Speaker 5: whether it's you know, the live shows or the streams
Speaker 5: or the podcast itself. So, you know, kudos to that
Speaker 5: had thought.
Speaker 1: Thanks man, Thanks man. I was gonna ask you where
Speaker 1: in Germany are you?
Speaker 5: Oh, I am in Lower Saxony. I wouldn't want to,
Speaker 5: you know, say that exact city, but I'm on Lower Saxony. Actually.
Speaker 5: I bought tickets to see both of your show in
Speaker 5: Amsterdam and Berlin last year, and I was sick for
Speaker 5: both days. Around next year again or I don't know
Speaker 5: what I would do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'll try. I'll try to come around. I'll try
Speaker 1: to come around. Yeah if I once, I gotta I
Speaker 1: gotta kind of build up some new act or some ship.
Speaker 1: But I'll try to come around. I always have a
Speaker 1: good time in Amsterdam and Berlin. Beautiful places, beautiful places.
Speaker 1: Huh what's your name again? I know you said, it's
Speaker 1: hard to pronounce.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's it's Moas, but worries people call me mo also,
Speaker 5: so that would be fun Moasas.
Speaker 1: It's been lovely talking to you. It's been lovely talking
Speaker 1: to you, man. Is there anything else that you want
Speaker 1: to share with the people of the computer before we
Speaker 1: scadadle on out of here?
Speaker 5: Keep grinding, keep hoping, and take care of your bets.
Speaker 5: And I really hope I end up on the podcast.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, this will be. This will be. This will
Speaker 1: be in the podcast. This will be in the podcast. Great, mo,
Speaker 1: take care, I have a go on, man, Bye bye bye.
Speaker 1: I liked that guy. That was a lovely, lovely guy.
Speaker 3: Hello.
Speaker 1: Hi, what's your name?
Speaker 3: Miranda?
Speaker 1: Miranda? What's up? Miranda?
Speaker 3: Right now? Walking on some railroad tracks?
Speaker 1: Okay? You you make? Are you doing like a like
Speaker 1: a Tumblr thing?
Speaker 3: I guess it could be, but no, not really, I
Speaker 3: guess you know, Ashley, this is crazy. We started. I started.
Speaker 3: I took like a shroom gummy thing like about three
Speaker 3: hours ago m hm, and then walked to a science
Speaker 3: museum with for kids, went in there and now walking
Speaker 3: back on railroad tracks?
Speaker 1: Are you are you tripping?
Speaker 3: I was more but not not too much. Now, I
Speaker 3: kind of just feel like silly.
Speaker 1: You kind of just feel like silly. That's good. That's good. Right,
Speaker 1: So you're you're in like a come down a little bit.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but not in a bad way. I've had like
Speaker 3: bad comdowns. This one's kind of just like it's freezing
Speaker 3: cold out and I want to not be outside anymore.
Speaker 3: But it's like tolerable because it's just silly.
Speaker 4: M M.
Speaker 1: Well let me, I mean, it's a what what is
Speaker 1: it is? It's okay, it's completely okay if if not anything.
Speaker 1: But did you have something particular you wanted to talk
Speaker 1: about today?
Speaker 5: Uh?
Speaker 3: Dude, not really. I was just calling and calling and calling.
Speaker 1: What is it that is? Well, let's do this. What's
Speaker 1: your life like, Miranda, what's going on in your in
Speaker 1: your universe?
Speaker 3: Uh? I don't really know. I go to work and
Speaker 3: I also don't go to work sometimes. And I like
Speaker 3: to ski sometimes, and I like to go outside sometimes, yeah,
Speaker 3: but also I like to go inside.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, but where.
Speaker 3: Are you are you?
Speaker 1: Where are you are you?
Speaker 5: Like?
Speaker 1: Walking through snow? I we're hearing a lot of snow crunches.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's that's the that's the snow yep. Nice, it's
Speaker 3: like it was. It was I don't know where you are.
Speaker 3: You felt this, but it was like fifty degrees for
Speaker 3: like a couple of days, and it was just a
Speaker 3: nice sneak peak to spring and summer. And so I've
Speaker 3: been thinking, like I need to go outside, like it's
Speaker 3: not as cold anymore, and then right now it's not
Speaker 3: working out for me. There's no more sneak peak.
Speaker 1: Well, what's your plan for the rest of the day
Speaker 1: now that you've already uh done so much.
Speaker 3: Well, my boyfriend's like walking so far behind me. I
Speaker 3: keep turning around and singing.
Speaker 1: Oh, okay, cool, this is cool. I thought you were alone,
Speaker 1: which would be fine, but it's nice to have something
Speaker 1: with you.
Speaker 3: No, I'm pretty much alone. He's like twenty five feet
Speaker 3: behind me. But I don't know. Today's like a weird
Speaker 3: day because I haven't remembered. It's kind of nice, but
Speaker 3: I feel like regularly I'm like super stressed out about
Speaker 3: absolutely everything. But today's a nice day to forget about
Speaker 3: life and just walk.
Speaker 1: Okay, I won't. I want to ask you what's stressing
Speaker 1: you out? If we can just walk? How's your boyfriend?
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's good. I think he looks good, he looks happy,
Speaker 3: he's I think he's also he was never surfing his
Speaker 3: head as like I actually in the beginning of this,
Speaker 3: we like parked at a trail head, like we were
Speaker 3: walking on snow like the whole time. We parked at
Speaker 3: a trail head and there was like a severed dear
Speaker 3: leg just like hanging out there. No body, just like
Speaker 3: the leg, and I had like just started feeling it,
Speaker 3: and so I was like, what's the fuck, Like what
Speaker 3: is going on? And then we started walking on the
Speaker 3: trail and I looked back and my boyfriend would pick
Speaker 3: up the He's like chasing me with it.
Speaker 1: Oh god, he picked up the severed deer leg. Dude.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was like, put that shit down.
Speaker 1: What a fucking psychopath.
Speaker 3: Yeah. It was kind of like I don't know, it
Speaker 3: must have been there. I don't know how long it
Speaker 3: was there for, but it was like dry. It wasn't
Speaker 3: like bloody. It was like it was like bone.
Speaker 1: Does he still have it? Does he? Well? It's funny
Speaker 1: because I mean I know what it's like to be
Speaker 1: walking around and pick up a stick, right and be like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm cool now I have a stick. But I don't
Speaker 1: know if i'd do that with a deer leg.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, no, I wasn't, dude. I was surprised it
Speaker 3: was in his hand. That's actually insane, and it was
Speaker 3: freaking out so I started running. But it's like, dude,
Speaker 3: I don't know. You never see just like a severed
Speaker 3: animal leg.
Speaker 1: You don't. And that's probably a good thing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, because you never see how the world really
Speaker 3: works outside of society, Like you just like having to
Speaker 3: kill for your food.
Speaker 1: You never see how the world really works outside of society. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it sounds like this this deer leg really gave you
Speaker 1: made you do some kind of existential questioning.
Speaker 3: Yeah, dude, I've never had to kill for my food,
Speaker 3: you know.
Speaker 1: No, you just make other people do it for you.
Speaker 1: It's a great American way. I mean, it's a life way.
Speaker 3: But we'll think about it and they become vegetarian, Miranda.
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go.
Speaker 3: Go on a walk?
Speaker 1: More?
Speaker 3: Go on more walks?
Speaker 1: I like that. I'll sign off on that.
Speaker 3: All right, all right, take care of yeah you too?
Speaker 1: By walking is good. I will sign off on that.
Speaker 1: Do I have anything else to say? About walking. Uh,
Speaker 1: it makes sense. It's probably my favorite thing to do
Speaker 1: is to walk around. Okay, that's all I have to
Speaker 1: say about walking. This has been a lovely episode. This
Speaker 1: has been really fun. Thank you guys all for listening.
Speaker 1: I am a gecko and uh yeah, I know, I
Speaker 1: know the past couple episodes have been me going insane slowly.
Speaker 1: But it's such a weird thing with this podcast, man,
Speaker 1: like I'll have and this has been going on since
Speaker 1: it started. And maybe this perspective is helpful to people,
Speaker 1: maybe they can apply it to something going on in
Speaker 1: their own life. But it's it's so weird because I'll
Speaker 1: have like and again this has been going on all
Speaker 1: five years that I've been doing this show. Is I'll
Speaker 1: have like a month where I'm recording this thing and
Speaker 1: I'm just like, I've fucking this is beyond me and
Speaker 1: I can't I like this feeling of like I don't
Speaker 1: know if I can be the like if I can
Speaker 1: like show up to this, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And then I'll have a month where I'm like, Wow,
Speaker 1: this is so awesome. I'm so stoked to get to
Speaker 1: talk to all these people and to have these like
Speaker 1: It'll just like like I'll be in my brain thinking
Speaker 1: like okay, well that's this is all. That's all over,
Speaker 1: and you know now it's this is just uh, you know,
Speaker 1: it's just gonna be despair forever. And then I'll have
Speaker 1: a month where I'm like, wait, actually we're back. Things
Speaker 1: are good, life is real, the world continues, you know.
Speaker 1: And today today, recording the podcast today was definitely one
Speaker 1: of those times where I'm like, wait, this is actually
Speaker 1: pretty awesome. So thank you guys for listening, Thanks everyone
Speaker 1: for calling, and I am excited to continue to be
Speaker 1: a get go and talk to people about life and stuff.
Speaker 1: Thank you very much. And oh once again, please'm in
Speaker 1: on Friday March fourteenth. Friday March fourteenth, I am doing
Speaker 1: an art exhibition in Bushwick, Brooklyn on March fourteenth from
Speaker 1: seven pm to ten pm and it's free and the closer.
Speaker 1: I don't actually know why I decided to do this.
Speaker 1: I was looking at my phone and I was like,
Speaker 1: why the fuck am I doing this? And that? But
Speaker 1: you know what, why the fuck does anyone do anything?
Speaker 1: Come see my trash the exhibition. The exhibition is called
Speaker 1: Lyle Forever presents Trash from around my room. Uh, you
Speaker 1: can find the link in the episode description and uh
Speaker 1: you can put your phone number in there and I'll
Speaker 1: text you more details about it. And also if I'm
Speaker 1: doing anything else, it's in Brooklyn, New York. Uh come
Speaker 1: hang uh yeah, check the episode description for the link
Speaker 1: to that. All right, thank you all very much for listening.
Speaker 1: GEK bless see you around the universe. See see you
Speaker 1: in a few days when I drop another episode of
Speaker 1: the podcast. As always, okay, thanks.
Speaker 2: Akain goes on the.
Speaker 4: Line taking your phone calls every nine every week.
Speaker 1: And goes to just teaching you the line exper