WEBVTT - No Golf No Masters: Celebrating Our Ungovernable Peccary Friends

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<v Speaker 1>As Media.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello and welcome to Natural Causes. I am doctor James

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<v Speaker 2>Stown and this is my new podcast about going outside

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<v Speaker 2>as well as the politics and practicalities behind it. With

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<v Speaker 2>what two episodes coming out today for our first week,

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<v Speaker 2>but after that we have one episode every Monday. This

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<v Speaker 2>episode is a fun, little chatty episode with myself and Molly.

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<v Speaker 2>What we're going to talk about have Alina, our friends

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<v Speaker 2>who are not pigs, and their disrespect for golf courses,

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<v Speaker 2>because one of the beliefs of this show is no golf,

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<v Speaker 2>no masters. Golf is an affront to God and we're

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<v Speaker 2>against it. But we also want to do some more

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<v Speaker 2>serious stuff. I think there's a need for serious, unabashed

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<v Speaker 2>journalism in the outdoor space and in the ag space.

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<v Speaker 2>So along with this episode you'll also find another one

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<v Speaker 2>where we talk about cyclospora, which is a diarrhea parasite

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<v Speaker 2>affecting the Midwest right now, and we talk about what

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<v Speaker 2>it can tell us about our food chain, the giant

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<v Speaker 2>companies are dominated, and labor rights for agricultural workers both

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<v Speaker 2>in the United States and elsewhere. Today, I am very

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<v Speaker 2>lucky to be joined by Molly Conga, the Internet's favorite

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<v Speaker 2>person who learns about animals.

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<v Speaker 3>Hi, Molly, I'm so excited to hear about not a pig.

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<v Speaker 3>It's not a pig. That's the only thing I know.

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<v Speaker 2>Not a pig.

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<v Speaker 4>Good.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, that's a great place because you're coming from a

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<v Speaker 2>place of more understanding than like most people. I feel

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<v Speaker 2>like today, Molly, we're going to talk about have Alina.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you know what they are?

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<v Speaker 3>If they're not a pig, they're a little friend. That's

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<v Speaker 3>kind of evil, a little friend. Yeah, well they're evil

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<v Speaker 3>in a good way. They're like evil for good. I

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<v Speaker 3>love that they look like they have like little tiny

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<v Speaker 3>high heels on.

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<v Speaker 2>They're like, yeah, have you ever seen them at like

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<v Speaker 2>full speed?

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<v Speaker 3>I've never seen it in person.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, it's a fucking sight to it. So like, I've

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<v Speaker 2>spent a lot of my life in Arizona, like Tuson,

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<v Speaker 2>Phoenixum and Yaki Territory, and I used to write bicycle

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<v Speaker 2>a lot. That was my job. So I'd be riding

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<v Speaker 2>out there on the dirt roads and the amount of

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<v Speaker 2>times Ahaveolina will just pick up next to you and

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<v Speaker 2>they are just booking it. It's like a coffee table.

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<v Speaker 2>It's just moving. Because they're not a narodynamic animal right,

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<v Speaker 2>and that their head is vastly disproportionate compared to their body,

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<v Speaker 2>but they can carry some speed. I hit one once

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<v Speaker 2>on my bicycle and that was an ugly day. They

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<v Speaker 2>rub their little teeth together because they have two vertical

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<v Speaker 2>teeth top and bottom, and they like rub them as

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<v Speaker 2>a sort of intimidating tactic.

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<v Speaker 3>That was intimidating.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I was intimidated. Yeah, first I didn't really know

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<v Speaker 2>what had happened, right, So one nu I'm riding along

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<v Speaker 2>the thing, I'm on the ground and here's this pekerey

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<v Speaker 2>coming towards me. The other thing to know about them

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<v Speaker 2>is the fucking stink. What you'll hear people say a

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<v Speaker 2>lot about Havolenos. They have a second asshole and those

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<v Speaker 2>people I'm wrong on his face.

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<v Speaker 3>Is it a stink gland situation?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, it's a musk I think. I think the technical

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<v Speaker 2>term is a musk glund and a sexual musk. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>what a revolting just It is funny that Elon Musk's

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<v Speaker 2>last name is also the same name for the stink.

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<v Speaker 3>Gland, the stink land on the nut pig.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and the not pig. But yeah, they do have

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<v Speaker 2>a stink land it's kind of up on their back

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<v Speaker 2>and they will use that to communicate danger to other

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<v Speaker 2>members of their group.

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<v Speaker 3>And is it just boys or do boys and girls

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<v Speaker 3>have the stinkland?

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<v Speaker 2>I think it's a unisex stink land. Okay, good for them, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>stink dunity is like that. Yeah, everyone stinks. They've rub

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<v Speaker 2>their scent on their territory and like that's how they know,

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<v Speaker 2>like who's around right, They're walking around the going sniff sniff,

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<v Speaker 2>Keithpin around here? You know he's doing fine. They have

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<v Speaker 2>terrible eyes sights, so they rely a lot on smell

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<v Speaker 2>that maybe that leads to the bicycle have Alina interactions.

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<v Speaker 3>I know they're not pigs, so they don't probably share

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<v Speaker 3>a wild pig's hostility towards the bicycle.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean they were not. They were really actively hostile.

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<v Speaker 2>I think what happened in this case was the Havalina

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<v Speaker 2>thought it could make it across and it to use

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<v Speaker 2>the George Bush's and it misunderestimated my speed and so

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<v Speaker 2>I hit the Have Alina right, lose the front wheel

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<v Speaker 2>straight over at handlebars. Have Alina is now like what

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<v Speaker 2>the fuck? I'm now like very confused. I'm lying on

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<v Speaker 2>the ground and it starts going with its real teeth

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<v Speaker 2>and smelling. It's a real full sensory experience. You got sight, sound, smell, pain.

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<v Speaker 3>Where did they come from?

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<v Speaker 2>So that is a good question.

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<v Speaker 3>Are they supposed to live in Arizona?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, supposed is an interesting term to use with animals

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<v Speaker 2>and where they live, right.

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<v Speaker 3>Like they were they born there?

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<v Speaker 2>These particular pecoris were born in Arizona. Yes, they've been

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<v Speaker 2>in the Americas for longer than people from Europe have.

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<v Speaker 3>So it's not like a Hawaiian mongoose situation.

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<v Speaker 2>No, No, it isn't like an axis deer like the

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<v Speaker 2>pigs in Hawaii right there. Feral pigs in Texas is

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<v Speaker 2>probably the best example, right of an invasive species which

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<v Speaker 2>is replicating at an unsustainably high.

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<v Speaker 3>Rate thirty to fifty every three to five minutes.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's the That's what we learned

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<v Speaker 2>from Jamie Loftus's bug guys. I propose that there are

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<v Speaker 2>people in Texas who make a lot of money from

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<v Speaker 2>the hunting of pigs, and even though they know their

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<v Speaker 2>invasive species and a halful species, they would also be

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<v Speaker 2>sad if they went away because they make a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of money from people in a helicopters shooting pigs with

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<v Speaker 2>night vision from a helicopter. That is how like if

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<v Speaker 2>the government wants to eradicate some think that's how it

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<v Speaker 2>goes about doing it for the most part. Right, Like

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<v Speaker 2>we had wild pigs.

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<v Speaker 3>Here, air strikes on the wild hogs.

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<v Speaker 2>The person is using a regular rifle in the helicopter

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<v Speaker 2>and they're not like using like a mini gun.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, but it's not like the most dangerous game. Just

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<v Speaker 3>get down there on the ground and follow it around

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<v Speaker 3>like a real man.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think the part of the value proposition for

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<v Speaker 2>that kind of hunter is shooting a gun out of

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<v Speaker 2>a helicopter.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, you're just a little boy who wants a helicopter ride,

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<v Speaker 3>grow up.

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<v Speaker 2>That is a Yeah, that is an experience that has

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<v Speaker 2>previously been unavailable to people outside call of due to

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<v Speaker 2>your military service. And along that continuum, if you want

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<v Speaker 2>to find the MiG point, I think it's shooting pigs

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<v Speaker 2>from a helicopter. It's not my idea of fair chase.

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<v Speaker 2>I'll say it that way.

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<v Speaker 3>It's not honorable. But if it's that a Rhodesia shoot

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<v Speaker 3>the pig, yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Sure, Yeah, there's a there's a pipeline that could have

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<v Speaker 2>gone in a different direction. So they live in like

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<v Speaker 2>South and Central America. They have significant populations in Texas

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<v Speaker 2>and of course in Arizona. Right. The reason we see

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<v Speaker 2>them so much is because they have adapted to live

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<v Speaker 2>alongside people. Like they're like a Karen, right. They love

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<v Speaker 2>a suburb, as we're going to find out, they love

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<v Speaker 2>a lawn. They fucking hate a golf course, which is

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<v Speaker 2>a stance I share with them, guys. Yeah, I love

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<v Speaker 2>to see it every time. I love to see a

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<v Speaker 2>golf course losing, like period could be natural disaster, it

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<v Speaker 2>could be pigs. I just like I love to see

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<v Speaker 2>a golf course destroyed.

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<v Speaker 3>Is it the little high heels that are tearing it up?

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<v Speaker 3>Or are they like disrespecting their surroundings.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, they they're very They're getting in there with the snout.

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<v Speaker 2>This is a podcast, right, and it's an audio medium.

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<v Speaker 2>So what people can't see is that with my neck

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<v Speaker 2>and head, I'm making a sort of like a yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>like a truffle pig.

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<v Speaker 3>But they're not pigs.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, no, this is a golf peckery. Different deal.

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<v Speaker 2>They have evolved right to find water in places where

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<v Speaker 2>there is not water like Arizona. Like Arizona. Yeah, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>all the water.

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<v Speaker 3>Is under the golf course, No wonder they're there.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, all the water is in the golf course.

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<v Speaker 2>We're going to talk about water and golf a little bit.

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<v Speaker 2>I want to do a little bit more peckery biology.

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<v Speaker 2>I guess first, they aren't really great for farming because

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<v Speaker 2>they take too long to reach sexual maturity. So that's

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<v Speaker 2>one of the things distinguishes them from your pig. Right.

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<v Speaker 3>Are people eating them?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Yeah, yeah, people eat them. Yeah. Yeah. Their leather

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<v Speaker 2>is actually really expensive. Like if you want to drop

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<v Speaker 2>four figures on a pair of gloves, they might be

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<v Speaker 2>made from a peckery from a have Alina.

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<v Speaker 3>Are they like super solved?

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<v Speaker 2>I think they are. I think that's super flexible. They

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<v Speaker 2>have a very distinct like spotty situation going on, Like

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<v Speaker 2>you could see you would know if you saw a

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<v Speaker 2>haleena glove, if you were in the know, if you're

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<v Speaker 2>a leather understander, game would recognize game. Think in that scenario,

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<v Speaker 2>literal game. They'll manage as gain in Arizona, so people

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<v Speaker 2>can hunt them and people do eat them. You'd probably

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<v Speaker 2>have to be pretty careful in the skinning and quartering

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<v Speaker 2>process going around those musk glands. But that's the same

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<v Speaker 2>with any animal that has those So unlike pigs, right,

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<v Speaker 2>they take longer to reach sexual maturity, and that means

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<v Speaker 2>that they're not reproducing at that crazy ass rate. And

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<v Speaker 2>pigs are great for farming, right. They grow super fast,

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<v Speaker 2>they reproduce super fast. They are an excellent machine for

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<v Speaker 2>turning vegetables into meat. It's that is what you're looking

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<v Speaker 2>at doing, then the pig is going to be a

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<v Speaker 2>better option for you. But there is evidence that some

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<v Speaker 2>people have kept them at some points in human history.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a little little semi domestic swine, and apparently some

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<v Speaker 2>folks who live in the Amazon rainforests still do. They'll

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<v Speaker 2>bring them into the town there to live amongst the people.

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<v Speaker 2>They don't really eat grass. I think people think, well,

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<v Speaker 2>when they're fucking up a golf course, they're not. I

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<v Speaker 2>think partially they're doing it for the love of the game,

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<v Speaker 2>but also they're looking for water. Right. They do love

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<v Speaker 2>to eat things like mesquite prickly pear acorns. They really

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<v Speaker 2>do well in over grazed and kind of more barren areas.

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<v Speaker 2>I guess, so like they're not competing with cattle. These

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<v Speaker 2>aren't areas of public land or grazing land where you

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<v Speaker 2>would graze cattle necessarily, right, So.

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<v Speaker 3>No wonder they're dominating Arizona.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, they're They're crushing it out there in Arizona.

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<v Speaker 2>They do love water and they do love shade because

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<v Speaker 2>they're desert animal, right, so they're like, okay, they see water,

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<v Speaker 2>they I've got to get some of that shit. So

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<v Speaker 2>one thing they do enjoy is swimming pools. Oh no,

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<v Speaker 2>a suburban neighborhood. Yeah, yeah, and.

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<v Speaker 3>They travel in packs. So you just go in your yard.

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<v Speaker 3>There's like seventeen of them in your pool. What do

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<v Speaker 3>you do?

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<v Speaker 2>Squadrons? They's a squadron of Haavelina. I've never seen them swim.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a drinking situation when they come to the pool.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know if they can. So if you've got

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<v Speaker 2>a video of a havelin a swimming I'd love to

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<v Speaker 2>see it.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna be googling this.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, okay, I would see them. I'd stay out with

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<v Speaker 2>a buddy who was kind of outside of Tucson. He

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<v Speaker 2>had a pool and I'd see they will have Alena

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<v Speaker 2>come in and have a little sip sip from the pool.

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<v Speaker 2>But they'll fuck up an irrigation hose in the absence

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<v Speaker 2>of a pool too, Like if they see one right there,

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<v Speaker 2>they may I don't know if they can hear the

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<v Speaker 2>water or what, but they get in there and they'll

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<v Speaker 2>them not ready up get the water out that way.

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<v Speaker 2>So talking of irrigation, it's time to talk about golf.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you remember the genesis of the have Alina hate

0:10:33.600 --> 0:10:35.920
<v Speaker 2>golf moment? I don't think I do.

0:10:36.040 --> 0:10:38.480
<v Speaker 3>I'm just I'm imagining all the videos I've seen of them,

0:10:38.520 --> 0:10:40.920
<v Speaker 3>just like tippy tappening down a suburban street.

0:10:41.679 --> 0:10:44.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, there's a good video of one in Tucson and

0:10:45.000 --> 0:10:46.960
<v Speaker 2>it's sending it like it's a full speed and it's

0:10:47.000 --> 0:10:50.760
<v Speaker 2>pretty impressive, and people have put various music soundtracks behind

0:10:50.760 --> 0:10:54.680
<v Speaker 2>it and they're all very funny. This began because let

0:10:54.679 --> 0:10:57.120
<v Speaker 2>me share this with you. So I'm just going to

0:10:57.200 --> 0:10:59.600
<v Speaker 2>read it out for the benefit of the listeners at home.

0:11:00.120 --> 0:11:03.760
<v Speaker 2>Come along with me on my carnage parentheses. I mean,

0:11:03.880 --> 0:11:05.320
<v Speaker 2>course check this morning.

0:11:05.480 --> 0:11:10.280
<v Speaker 3>Oh my god, Yeah, it looks like somebody like used

0:11:10.280 --> 0:11:11.240
<v Speaker 3>a rototiller.

0:11:11.960 --> 0:11:13.800
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, no, they'll fuck it up like it does look

0:11:13.840 --> 0:11:17.000
<v Speaker 2>like a rotivator went through there. Yeah, and it's everywhere

0:11:17.040 --> 0:11:20.000
<v Speaker 2>along this golf course just hits.

0:11:20.200 --> 0:11:21.959
<v Speaker 3>Good for them. I wish they were still there. I

0:11:21.960 --> 0:11:23.120
<v Speaker 3>would love to see them doing it.

0:11:23.679 --> 0:11:28.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, unfortunately but fortunately for us. Unfortunately for MKC Turf

0:11:28.840 --> 0:11:31.679
<v Speaker 2>that t RF. To be clear, I'm not aware of

0:11:31.760 --> 0:11:33.080
<v Speaker 2>this person is transfer or not.

0:11:33.240 --> 0:11:35.120
<v Speaker 3>I think she just I think she just loves grass

0:11:35.360 --> 0:11:35.920
<v Speaker 3>turf rain.

0:11:36.040 --> 0:11:39.240
<v Speaker 2>Oh Molly, she fucking loves grass. Let me tell you.

0:11:39.559 --> 0:11:43.520
<v Speaker 2>I found an hour and seventeen minute long podcast, Tiger

0:11:43.640 --> 0:11:48.440
<v Speaker 2>Turf Talk, in which she gives an interview about grass.

0:11:48.240 --> 0:11:51.600
<v Speaker 3>As someone with a tense special interest that is difficult

0:11:51.640 --> 0:11:55.000
<v Speaker 3>for others. I feel for her, but also I don't

0:11:55.000 --> 0:11:55.760
<v Speaker 3>know about all that. Girl.

0:11:56.559 --> 0:11:59.800
<v Speaker 2>I want you to just listen to the first tense

0:12:07.440 --> 0:12:09.560
<v Speaker 2>Tiger Turf Talk with Drew Miller.

0:12:10.120 --> 0:12:11.160
<v Speaker 3>Oh, this is intense.

0:12:11.640 --> 0:12:16.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Tiger Turf. I lend a lot listening to this podcast. Molly,

0:12:16.480 --> 0:12:20.800
<v Speaker 2>did you listen to the whole hour aroune seventeen minutes? Yes? Wow,

0:12:21.160 --> 0:12:24.520
<v Speaker 2>I learned a lot. Turf twitters relentless. Sometimes it's like guys,

0:12:24.880 --> 0:12:27.360
<v Speaker 2>same team. I come from a country wear. Grass just

0:12:27.400 --> 0:12:30.640
<v Speaker 2>grows by itself. Now, evidently there are specialist forms of grass.

0:12:31.000 --> 0:12:33.520
<v Speaker 2>There was a prolonged clip of her describing the damage.

0:12:33.800 --> 0:12:36.360
<v Speaker 4>If I could train them, they'd be amazing sawd cutters

0:12:36.400 --> 0:12:39.000
<v Speaker 4>because they roll the sad Like a lot of the

0:12:39.040 --> 0:12:40.719
<v Speaker 4>times you'll walk by and there'll be like a four

0:12:40.760 --> 0:12:43.720
<v Speaker 4>or five foot section completely rolled over. So they chomp

0:12:43.800 --> 0:12:45.160
<v Speaker 4>it up a little bit with their teeth and then

0:12:45.160 --> 0:12:48.200
<v Speaker 4>they nose under it and push it. It just becomes

0:12:48.360 --> 0:12:52.520
<v Speaker 4>so mentally draining when you fix the same fairway for

0:12:52.600 --> 0:12:55.120
<v Speaker 4>the tenth day in a row, and it's like, why

0:12:55.160 --> 0:12:56.000
<v Speaker 4>am I even doing this?

0:12:58.440 --> 0:13:01.880
<v Speaker 2>Just absolutely destroyed by the Yeah, yeah, I think she

0:13:02.360 --> 0:13:04.119
<v Speaker 2>went to war with the Havevelinas a lost.

0:13:04.360 --> 0:13:07.120
<v Speaker 3>Like Havelina is one hundred mkc terf zero.

0:13:08.200 --> 0:13:11.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, she tried to use million scovel unit like chili oil.

0:13:12.240 --> 0:13:16.000
<v Speaker 4>You bought this million scobel unit chili oil, and we

0:13:16.040 --> 0:13:17.959
<v Speaker 4>put it in the sprayers and we were spraying it on.

0:13:17.880 --> 0:13:22.080
<v Speaker 2>The we're putting.

0:13:22.160 --> 0:13:23.880
<v Speaker 4>Everyone's eyes are watering.

0:13:23.600 --> 0:13:27.280
<v Speaker 2>Carolina Reaper, I'm your ass out of here.

0:13:28.480 --> 0:13:33.160
<v Speaker 4>Unfortunately for me, the pigs liked it, just didn't even care.

0:13:33.640 --> 0:13:36.040
<v Speaker 3>Oh does that deter them? How do they feel about

0:13:36.040 --> 0:13:36.720
<v Speaker 3>spicy food?

0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:38.240
<v Speaker 2>Apparently they don't give a shit.

0:13:38.240 --> 0:13:39.040
<v Speaker 3>There's South American.

0:13:39.640 --> 0:13:42.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, if they come from the place the chili comes from.

0:13:42.440 --> 0:13:45.000
<v Speaker 3>I use chili powder mixed with vegetable oil on my

0:13:45.120 --> 0:13:47.080
<v Speaker 3>bird seed to keep the squirrels away from it, and

0:13:47.080 --> 0:13:49.680
<v Speaker 3>that seems to be effective. But a squirrel is a

0:13:49.679 --> 0:13:50.960
<v Speaker 3>little bit compared to this guy.

0:13:51.400 --> 0:13:54.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's squirrels. Ain't got ship on a helena like

0:13:54.040 --> 0:13:58.240
<v Speaker 2>I use it for for rats, possums and raccoons and

0:13:58.280 --> 0:13:59.800
<v Speaker 2>all the other little creatures that have to come and

0:13:59.800 --> 0:14:02.319
<v Speaker 2>eat my chicken food. It also makes a yolks more

0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:04.760
<v Speaker 2>kind of orange yellow, which is nice, like a little

0:14:04.800 --> 0:14:11.120
<v Speaker 2>redness to this un thinks of it. Let's talk about

0:14:11.160 --> 0:14:14.600
<v Speaker 2>fucking golf, shall we. Golf is a scourge on humanity.

0:14:14.400 --> 0:14:16.520
<v Speaker 3>Especially in Arizona. It should be against the law.

0:14:16.960 --> 0:14:18.520
<v Speaker 2>If we're going to have a state and we're going

0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:20.640
<v Speaker 2>to have a government, and that state is going to

0:14:20.680 --> 0:14:22.640
<v Speaker 2>retain the capacity to do violence, I would like to

0:14:22.680 --> 0:14:24.640
<v Speaker 2>see them direct that towards golf.

0:14:24.880 --> 0:14:27.120
<v Speaker 3>State monopoly on violence against golfers.

0:14:27.360 --> 0:14:30.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Like, if we're gonna do it, we should. We

0:14:30.040 --> 0:14:32.720
<v Speaker 2>should defend something which is objectively in the public interest,

0:14:32.720 --> 0:14:34.440
<v Speaker 2>which is not having golf.

0:14:34.520 --> 0:14:37.440
<v Speaker 3>It's just an enormous amount of land for a couple

0:14:37.480 --> 0:14:40.320
<v Speaker 3>of guys to fuck around on, and an inane amount

0:14:40.320 --> 0:14:42.720
<v Speaker 3>of water and a lot of toxic chemicals.

0:14:42.840 --> 0:14:46.360
<v Speaker 2>Mm hm. There are more golf courses in the United

0:14:46.400 --> 0:14:49.680
<v Speaker 2>States than any other country in the world. Why it's

0:14:50.160 --> 0:14:52.720
<v Speaker 2>hard to say. It's a very American thing. I think

0:14:52.720 --> 0:14:56.360
<v Speaker 2>it's this idea, right that comes when you steal a

0:14:56.560 --> 0:14:58.960
<v Speaker 2>large volume of land, that there is a limited space.

0:14:59.520 --> 0:15:01.920
<v Speaker 3>I just want to do the least useful stuff imaginable.

0:15:01.960 --> 0:15:03.840
<v Speaker 3>It's like a conspicuous land consumption.

0:15:04.360 --> 0:15:07.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, yeah, let me be flagrantly silly with the

0:15:07.400 --> 0:15:10.440
<v Speaker 2>land and water. Some more golf stats. There are only

0:15:10.480 --> 0:15:13.600
<v Speaker 2>three countries on the planet with more golf courses in Florida.

0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:17.320
<v Speaker 2>The United States has sixteen thousand golf courses, forty two

0:15:17.320 --> 0:15:19.920
<v Speaker 2>percent of the global total of golf courses.

0:15:20.280 --> 0:15:21.960
<v Speaker 3>Who's playing all this golf?

0:15:22.320 --> 0:15:25.080
<v Speaker 2>I think we could probably pick out a certain demographic

0:15:25.120 --> 0:15:27.840
<v Speaker 2>group of people who are dominating in golf participation.

0:15:28.360 --> 0:15:32.640
<v Speaker 3>Everything's gender, right, everything's gender. Men are just afraid to

0:15:32.680 --> 0:15:36.840
<v Speaker 3>say they want to hang out like they crave companionship.

0:15:36.920 --> 0:15:38.600
<v Speaker 3>They just want to be dudes chilling.

0:15:39.400 --> 0:15:41.480
<v Speaker 2>I played golf once in my life, actually, I guess

0:15:41.520 --> 0:15:45.520
<v Speaker 2>I went to one of those driving ranges went with

0:15:45.560 --> 0:15:47.920
<v Speaker 2>my dad. It was hot, sweaty, one of the rare

0:15:47.920 --> 0:15:49.960
<v Speaker 2>hot days in the United Kingdom. I let go of

0:15:50.000 --> 0:15:50.480
<v Speaker 2>the golf club.

0:15:50.520 --> 0:15:52.360
<v Speaker 3>Are you're not supposed to do that. You're supposed to

0:15:52.360 --> 0:15:52.720
<v Speaker 3>hang on to that.

0:15:52.760 --> 0:15:54.080
<v Speaker 2>No, you're not supposed to do that. It went through

0:15:54.080 --> 0:15:54.400
<v Speaker 2>the roof.

0:15:54.480 --> 0:15:55.560
<v Speaker 3>I'm sure they're insured.

0:15:55.800 --> 0:15:56.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah, it's fine.

0:15:57.000 --> 0:15:59.320
<v Speaker 3>And also fuck the golf Manah.

0:15:58.800 --> 0:16:01.760
<v Speaker 2>You can't do a crime against golf because golf is bad.

0:16:02.560 --> 0:16:05.840
<v Speaker 2>The water, right, like the water use of golf courses

0:16:05.880 --> 0:16:08.120
<v Speaker 2>is something that will never not make me that. I

0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:12.160
<v Speaker 2>found some data from the Pima County Board of Supervisors.

0:16:12.160 --> 0:16:13.840
<v Speaker 3>I think famously wet location.

0:16:14.600 --> 0:16:16.600
<v Speaker 2>Pema County one of those places where do you think

0:16:16.600 --> 0:16:18.480
<v Speaker 2>about it, think swampy water eave.

0:16:18.640 --> 0:16:19.440
<v Speaker 3>Like a rainforest.

0:16:19.560 --> 0:16:24.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, a real grass Habitat five point five thousand acre

0:16:24.160 --> 0:16:26.160
<v Speaker 2>feet of a year of water in Pema County use

0:16:26.240 --> 0:16:29.760
<v Speaker 2>for golf, one third of it comes from groundwater. That's

0:16:29.800 --> 0:16:31.480
<v Speaker 2>twenty twenty three numbers, so it might have gone up.

0:16:32.000 --> 0:16:35.360
<v Speaker 2>That equates to more than two thy seven hundred Olympic

0:16:35.440 --> 0:16:39.320
<v Speaker 2>size swimming pools. So it's about nine hundred swimming pools

0:16:39.360 --> 0:16:43.560
<v Speaker 2>getting pulled from groundwater, which is not like recycled water. Right,

0:16:43.600 --> 0:16:46.360
<v Speaker 2>that is draining from a resource that is finite and

0:16:46.400 --> 0:16:49.800
<v Speaker 2>that we are very much we need to use more carefully.

0:16:49.880 --> 0:16:52.440
<v Speaker 2>I guess have we considered.

0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:54.920
<v Speaker 3>Pitting the golf courses against the data centers.

0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:57.640
<v Speaker 2>One of the data center talking points was that data

0:16:57.640 --> 0:17:00.040
<v Speaker 2>centers use less water than golf.

0:17:00.160 --> 0:17:03.760
<v Speaker 3>Because Loudon County has unlimited golf courses and unlimited data centers.

0:17:03.800 --> 0:17:04.720
<v Speaker 3>And I think they should fight.

0:17:05.280 --> 0:17:06.840
<v Speaker 2>I would love to see I'd love to see this

0:17:06.880 --> 0:17:09.280
<v Speaker 2>be a zero sum game. I would love to see

0:17:09.760 --> 0:17:12.320
<v Speaker 2>a set amount of water much less than they're using

0:17:12.359 --> 0:17:15.360
<v Speaker 2>now portioned off and then we can leave them to it, right,

0:17:15.400 --> 0:17:18.160
<v Speaker 2>we can let them fight. That will be That would

0:17:18.160 --> 0:17:21.520
<v Speaker 2>be my compromise solution. So let's talk about have Alina

0:17:21.640 --> 0:17:24.800
<v Speaker 2>and golf. The golf course isn't being destroyed by havelina.

0:17:25.080 --> 0:17:27.480
<v Speaker 2>The golf course is destroying the place where the havelna live.

0:17:27.560 --> 0:17:29.920
<v Speaker 3>They're just outside, yeah, there, out there.

0:17:29.840 --> 0:17:32.720
<v Speaker 2>All the time. No one has to irrigate them. They

0:17:32.760 --> 0:17:34.720
<v Speaker 2>have been digging up juice to little roots for water,

0:17:34.880 --> 0:17:37.560
<v Speaker 2>drinking from cattle troughs and pools, and thriving in this

0:17:37.720 --> 0:17:40.040
<v Speaker 2>environment for much much longer than golf.

0:17:40.119 --> 0:17:42.479
<v Speaker 3>I think these fancy ladies are just being responsible stewards

0:17:42.480 --> 0:17:43.120
<v Speaker 3>of the environment.

0:17:43.400 --> 0:17:46.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. If Edward Abbey was still alive, I think he

0:17:46.119 --> 0:17:49.000
<v Speaker 2>would stand with the have Alina unless some of his

0:17:49.080 --> 0:17:51.440
<v Speaker 2>more gross opinions got in the way, which they are

0:17:51.520 --> 0:17:52.159
<v Speaker 2>far too often did.

0:17:52.200 --> 0:17:54.280
<v Speaker 3>Fed with Abby Hee, Why is one of the pictures

0:17:54.320 --> 0:17:56.320
<v Speaker 3>when I google Hawelena a pizza?

0:17:56.560 --> 0:17:57.240
<v Speaker 2>Oh, I don't know.

0:17:57.600 --> 0:17:58.680
<v Speaker 3>Is this hafolina meat?

0:17:58.920 --> 0:18:01.960
<v Speaker 2>It could be. I would imagine that the fat on

0:18:01.960 --> 0:18:05.199
<v Speaker 2>a havolina is pretty gamy and if you wouldn't want

0:18:05.240 --> 0:18:06.720
<v Speaker 2>to make it into like a sausage situation.

0:18:06.880 --> 0:18:08.920
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, it looks like sort of like a brisket

0:18:09.040 --> 0:18:11.400
<v Speaker 3>type texture and it's on top of a pizza. Why

0:18:11.440 --> 0:18:13.320
<v Speaker 3>is that one of the top pictures of this animal?

0:18:13.480 --> 0:18:15.399
<v Speaker 2>Why would you put it on a pizza? Treat it

0:18:15.440 --> 0:18:19.240
<v Speaker 2>with respect? Our one Italian listener has now left the podcast.

0:18:20.119 --> 0:18:22.320
<v Speaker 2>It seems to be pretty fucking stupid. I guess to

0:18:22.440 --> 0:18:25.119
<v Speaker 2>build this big moist fair way in the middle of

0:18:25.160 --> 0:18:28.119
<v Speaker 2>havolina's habitat and not expect the havolina to use it.

0:18:28.200 --> 0:18:29.840
<v Speaker 3>I mean, it's a pie on the window cell. You're

0:18:29.880 --> 0:18:32.920
<v Speaker 3>gonna You're gonna draw people with the smell of the pie.

0:18:32.720 --> 0:18:34.320
<v Speaker 2>With the pie, and then you say the pie is

0:18:34.320 --> 0:18:37.000
<v Speaker 2>only for golfers, and then they will say, watch me.

0:18:37.720 --> 0:18:43.080
<v Speaker 2>It's so incredibly silly to expect the havolina to respect

0:18:43.119 --> 0:18:45.760
<v Speaker 2>the private property of your gated community or golf course.

0:18:45.880 --> 0:18:49.680
<v Speaker 2>Like the detachment from the way the world fucking works.

0:18:50.000 --> 0:18:53.240
<v Speaker 2>That makes you think that the havolina, right, this animal

0:18:53.240 --> 0:18:56.600
<v Speaker 2>which has learned to thrive often at the worldland urban

0:18:56.640 --> 0:18:59.840
<v Speaker 2>interface by finding water, it's not going to come to

0:18:59.880 --> 0:19:02.560
<v Speaker 2>the thing which you are pouring all of our water into.

0:19:02.800 --> 0:19:04.960
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, it boggles in mind. I guess if

0:19:04.960 --> 0:19:06.199
<v Speaker 2>people didn't expect this.

0:19:07.119 --> 0:19:10.199
<v Speaker 3>I mean, I'm barely respecting their private property and I

0:19:10.240 --> 0:19:11.600
<v Speaker 3>can read and be arrested.

0:19:11.800 --> 0:19:13.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, have alna.

0:19:13.480 --> 0:19:14.840
<v Speaker 3>They can't read or be arrested.

0:19:14.880 --> 0:19:17.480
<v Speaker 2>Why did they They're controlled as a game animal, so

0:19:17.600 --> 0:19:20.680
<v Speaker 2>not like as as like vermin, right, So they can't

0:19:20.720 --> 0:19:22.439
<v Speaker 2>just go out and shoot them all. You'd have to

0:19:22.560 --> 0:19:25.240
<v Speaker 2>apply in the lottery, get your have Aleena tag and

0:19:25.320 --> 0:19:28.320
<v Speaker 2>then hunt them during the Havolina season.

0:19:28.400 --> 0:19:29.399
<v Speaker 3>Oh only in season.

0:19:29.760 --> 0:19:30.719
<v Speaker 2>Yep, they have a season.

0:19:30.960 --> 0:19:34.120
<v Speaker 3>So if they're just running rampant, there's nothing you can do.

0:19:34.320 --> 0:19:36.399
<v Speaker 3>You just have to watch and suffer that rocks.

0:19:36.760 --> 0:19:39.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Yeah. They end up trying to make them go

0:19:39.400 --> 0:19:42.520
<v Speaker 2>away with things like their chili oil, with things.

0:19:42.320 --> 0:19:43.760
<v Speaker 3>Like shaking a can of rocks.

0:19:44.359 --> 0:19:46.800
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, putting up a sign it says get off my lawn,

0:19:47.680 --> 0:19:49.640
<v Speaker 2>you know, like talking about the Vietnam War. I don't

0:19:49.680 --> 0:19:51.440
<v Speaker 2>know what they what they do to make them go away.

0:19:51.720 --> 0:19:54.560
<v Speaker 2>They've tried electric fences. I'm sure the pigs have to

0:19:54.600 --> 0:19:57.200
<v Speaker 2>disrespect a fence, so that wouldn't surprise me. The thing is,

0:19:57.240 --> 0:20:00.280
<v Speaker 2>people have lived with have Alena for a very long time, right,

0:20:00.400 --> 0:20:04.359
<v Speaker 2>like in Central and South America. Again, like before European

0:20:04.400 --> 0:20:08.000
<v Speaker 2>colonizers came here, people have Alina lived here very happily.

0:20:08.560 --> 0:20:12.359
<v Speaker 2>I read a little bit about their domestication. I don't

0:20:12.359 --> 0:20:14.639
<v Speaker 2>want anyone to go and try and domesticate have Alena.

0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:16.960
<v Speaker 2>Animal doesn't have to be cute for you to care

0:20:17.000 --> 0:20:18.720
<v Speaker 2>about it, for it to have a right to exist

0:20:19.000 --> 0:20:21.080
<v Speaker 2>on its landscape, right. I think sometimes this is a

0:20:21.119 --> 0:20:23.080
<v Speaker 2>mistake people make. I see it a lot with like

0:20:23.160 --> 0:20:25.880
<v Speaker 2>marine mammals, Like people are like, oh, that seal is cute,

0:20:25.920 --> 0:20:28.560
<v Speaker 2>shouldn't hurt it, Like sea lions are not cute. I

0:20:28.600 --> 0:20:30.760
<v Speaker 2>know sea lions aren't seals. Sea lions are fucking evil.

0:20:31.119 --> 0:20:32.919
<v Speaker 2>Look at their teeth. There's a reason they're called lions.

0:20:33.200 --> 0:20:35.600
<v Speaker 2>If you're going in the water, like if you're spearfishing

0:20:35.720 --> 0:20:38.080
<v Speaker 2>or something like those they will haras the shit out

0:20:38.119 --> 0:20:41.040
<v Speaker 2>of you. But like they have a right to exist there.

0:20:41.160 --> 0:20:43.720
<v Speaker 3>There's not many wild animals you should really be touching.

0:20:43.720 --> 0:20:45.399
<v Speaker 3>I mean, even the prairie dogs have the plague.

0:20:45.880 --> 0:20:48.199
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I wouldn't be touching a prairie dog like on

0:20:48.240 --> 0:21:04.000
<v Speaker 2>the regular. The last thing I want to get into,

0:21:04.040 --> 0:21:08.280
<v Speaker 2>maley is the mysterious fourth type of peckery, the rarest

0:21:08.359 --> 0:21:11.720
<v Speaker 2>kind of peckery. So generally there are understood to be

0:21:11.800 --> 0:21:15.760
<v Speaker 2>three peckory species, right, I didn't know that. Yeah, soja

0:21:15.800 --> 0:21:17.560
<v Speaker 2>Aline is a collared peckery.

0:21:17.359 --> 0:21:20.119
<v Speaker 3>Okay, because they got the kind of like rough yeah cute.

0:21:20.640 --> 0:21:24.240
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, they look like like a Shakespearean guy. I mean, vaguely,

0:21:24.280 --> 0:21:26.960
<v Speaker 2>I suppose. If it's not, it's not a close resemblance.

0:21:27.400 --> 0:21:29.439
<v Speaker 2>You've got the white lip peckery and the chacoh and

0:21:29.480 --> 0:21:33.320
<v Speaker 2>peckery as well. Oh who's he the chackhen peckory. He

0:21:33.400 --> 0:21:34.320
<v Speaker 2>lives further south.

0:21:34.520 --> 0:21:39.720
<v Speaker 3>He looks like a deformed, tiny buffalo. That's so cute.

0:21:39.600 --> 0:21:42.399
<v Speaker 2>After a fashion I guess, yeah, like like a buffalo pig.

0:21:42.440 --> 0:21:45.160
<v Speaker 3>Like if alf was a tiny buffalo.

0:21:45.480 --> 0:21:49.280
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Yeah, they do have a distinct alf vibe. I

0:21:49.280 --> 0:21:51.600
<v Speaker 2>didn't know what species alf is supposed to be. Actually,

0:21:51.840 --> 0:21:54.479
<v Speaker 2>maybe Alfa is a peckery. He's from space, right, Oh,

0:21:54.520 --> 0:21:56.080
<v Speaker 2>he's from space. Well, space peckery.

0:21:56.320 --> 0:21:57.479
<v Speaker 3>That's the secret fourth peckery.

0:21:57.840 --> 0:22:00.639
<v Speaker 2>That's no, the secret fourth pactory, to my knowledge, is space.

0:22:00.920 --> 0:22:02.440
<v Speaker 2>It is the giant peckory.

0:22:02.680 --> 0:22:04.360
<v Speaker 3>How big is it?

0:22:04.359 --> 0:22:05.120
<v Speaker 2>It's pretty big?

0:22:05.320 --> 0:22:07.600
<v Speaker 3>Oh, from like back when sloths were as big as

0:22:07.640 --> 0:22:08.200
<v Speaker 3>an elephant.

0:22:08.560 --> 0:22:12.159
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's not quite that big. Yeah, it's not like

0:22:12.160 --> 0:22:16.240
<v Speaker 2>a like a giant sloths short face bear situation.

0:22:16.520 --> 0:22:18.359
<v Speaker 3>Don't email me. They weren't as big as an elephant,

0:22:18.359 --> 0:22:20.120
<v Speaker 3>but they were really big, okay, you know, really big.

0:22:20.160 --> 0:22:21.680
<v Speaker 3>I've seen it at the I've seen it at the museum.

0:22:21.880 --> 0:22:24.720
<v Speaker 2>Its Latin name is Pecory maximus, which I think is

0:22:24.760 --> 0:22:25.520
<v Speaker 2>pretty sick fair.

0:22:25.680 --> 0:22:26.520
<v Speaker 3>He's the biggest one.

0:22:26.800 --> 0:22:29.440
<v Speaker 2>Yep, they could make a film about him, so they reckon.

0:22:29.720 --> 0:22:31.920
<v Speaker 2>He weighs about fifty kilos.

0:22:31.840 --> 0:22:33.480
<v Speaker 3>That's like one hundred and ten pounds.

0:22:33.680 --> 0:22:35.800
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, about one hundred and ten pounds, which is pretty big.

0:22:36.320 --> 0:22:39.040
<v Speaker 2>Much bigger than your regular peckory, right, Like your regular

0:22:39.080 --> 0:22:41.040
<v Speaker 2>pecory is going to be like maybe two thirds of

0:22:41.080 --> 0:22:41.920
<v Speaker 2>that that I had to guess.

0:22:42.000 --> 0:22:43.640
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, you wouldn't want to fight him on a bike.

0:22:43.920 --> 0:22:45.480
<v Speaker 2>No, yeah, do you hate about a bike? You probably

0:22:45.520 --> 0:22:48.600
<v Speaker 2>break a bike or part of yourself. It was quote

0:22:48.680 --> 0:22:51.240
<v Speaker 2>unquote identified by a Dutch biologist. I think this is

0:22:51.280 --> 0:22:52.840
<v Speaker 2>one of those things that most of us can realize.

0:22:52.880 --> 0:22:55.760
<v Speaker 2>It's like the Dutch guy wasn't the first guy to

0:22:55.760 --> 0:22:58.639
<v Speaker 2>see it, right, the two p people who live there,

0:22:59.080 --> 0:23:01.119
<v Speaker 2>they call it the great pet that lives in pairs.

0:23:01.200 --> 0:23:03.439
<v Speaker 3>Oh, it still exists. This isn't like an ancient creature.

0:23:03.520 --> 0:23:05.919
<v Speaker 2>No, No, this is a this is a well it

0:23:05.960 --> 0:23:09.440
<v Speaker 2>is a debated topic whether this is a different type

0:23:09.480 --> 0:23:11.680
<v Speaker 2>of pecory or just a particularly.

0:23:11.240 --> 0:23:13.280
<v Speaker 3>Or is it just one really fat one that people

0:23:13.320 --> 0:23:14.119
<v Speaker 3>see sometimes?

0:23:14.440 --> 0:23:18.119
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, exactly, Like is he just the thickest peckori and

0:23:18.160 --> 0:23:20.080
<v Speaker 2>he walks around on his own just presiciably, like no

0:23:20.119 --> 0:23:22.120
<v Speaker 2>one wants to share food with him. Oh, he won't

0:23:22.160 --> 0:23:25.760
<v Speaker 2>fear food with anyone. There is some variants right within

0:23:25.960 --> 0:23:29.560
<v Speaker 2>any species. Right, so perhaps this guy just happens to

0:23:29.600 --> 0:23:32.880
<v Speaker 2>be particularly large. It's distinguished from the other peckories which

0:23:32.920 --> 0:23:36.359
<v Speaker 2>walk around in groups. I guess this one. It seems

0:23:36.400 --> 0:23:39.159
<v Speaker 2>to be only walking around in pairs or around its

0:23:39.200 --> 0:23:40.080
<v Speaker 2>own So like.

0:23:40.240 --> 0:23:42.359
<v Speaker 3>Is this a separate kind of animal or is this

0:23:42.400 --> 0:23:45.159
<v Speaker 3>a situation where it's a whole species of people my

0:23:45.280 --> 0:23:46.919
<v Speaker 3>size and one guy is Shaquille O'Neal.

0:23:47.280 --> 0:23:50.919
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Is this a natural variant within within the broad

0:23:50.960 --> 0:23:53.720
<v Speaker 2>peckory universe or is this a completely different peccory up

0:23:53.760 --> 0:23:57.920
<v Speaker 2>for debate. It seems like science is now moving towards

0:23:58.040 --> 0:24:01.400
<v Speaker 2>it not being a different specie, and also moving away

0:24:01.440 --> 0:24:05.600
<v Speaker 2>from peckory being its own genus. Sadly, if this guy

0:24:06.040 --> 0:24:09.680
<v Speaker 2>was his own species, illegal logging and hunting might make

0:24:09.720 --> 0:24:12.359
<v Speaker 2>it very likely that he would be extremely endangered.

0:24:12.440 --> 0:24:14.800
<v Speaker 3>I think we should transport him to the nicest golf

0:24:14.840 --> 0:24:16.240
<v Speaker 3>course and let him be happy.

0:24:16.640 --> 0:24:18.720
<v Speaker 2>Yes, this is where I want to end this podcast

0:24:18.720 --> 0:24:23.880
<v Speaker 2>with a modest proposal that iHeartRadio send me to the Amazon.

0:24:24.200 --> 0:24:26.200
<v Speaker 2>I'll ride my bike around until I hit one. At

0:24:26.200 --> 0:24:27.080
<v Speaker 2>that point I will.

0:24:26.880 --> 0:24:29.919
<v Speaker 3>Wrestle him, put him in the helicopter exactly, yeah, and

0:24:30.240 --> 0:24:32.960
<v Speaker 3>transport him to the Trump National Golf Course.

0:24:33.400 --> 0:24:37.199
<v Speaker 2>Yes, I will. I'll be the one guy chasing not

0:24:37.240 --> 0:24:39.680
<v Speaker 2>a pig in a helicopter with night vision for good

0:24:40.240 --> 0:24:42.520
<v Speaker 2>and I will jump out. God, when I was a kid,

0:24:42.600 --> 0:24:45.159
<v Speaker 2>we used to do that. Not a kind thing to

0:24:45.200 --> 0:24:46.760
<v Speaker 2>do to animals, to be clear, and I think it's

0:24:46.840 --> 0:24:48.800
<v Speaker 2>kind of a douche move. But when I was younger,

0:24:48.840 --> 0:24:51.360
<v Speaker 2>we would ride on the sideboard to the land rover

0:24:51.440 --> 0:24:55.600
<v Speaker 2>and then jump out and wrastle warthogs for why. There's

0:24:55.640 --> 0:24:58.080
<v Speaker 2>a thing that happens between the age of about thirteen

0:24:58.200 --> 0:25:02.960
<v Speaker 2>and eighteen two men where your brain doesn't work properly.

0:25:03.000 --> 0:25:04.040
<v Speaker 3>Did you ever win?

0:25:04.359 --> 0:25:04.479
<v Speaker 4>Oh?

0:25:04.560 --> 0:25:06.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, a couple of times. Most often you.

0:25:06.320 --> 0:25:08.360
<v Speaker 3>Lose because the war hog's not going to tap out.

0:25:08.720 --> 0:25:10.600
<v Speaker 2>No, no, warhog will fuck you up too. Like there,

0:25:10.840 --> 0:25:13.760
<v Speaker 2>it's definitely like a it's definitely like a more than

0:25:13.760 --> 0:25:16.000
<v Speaker 2>a fair fight. I mean, even you're on land rover,

0:25:16.080 --> 0:25:17.920
<v Speaker 2>so it's a bit silly, Okay, I.

0:25:17.840 --> 0:25:20.719
<v Speaker 3>Have a stupid question. Yeah, they have warhogs in England.

0:25:21.200 --> 0:25:22.840
<v Speaker 2>No, no, no, no, I wasn't in England at that time.

0:25:22.880 --> 0:25:25.040
<v Speaker 2>That I was in East Africa at that time.

0:25:25.280 --> 0:25:27.800
<v Speaker 3>Because I don't think that's right. I don't think they

0:25:27.840 --> 0:25:29.560
<v Speaker 3>have timones or boombas there.

0:25:29.960 --> 0:25:30.040
<v Speaker 4>No.

0:25:30.200 --> 0:25:32.840
<v Speaker 2>Sadly, we had like the most exciting shit we had

0:25:32.840 --> 0:25:37.080
<v Speaker 2>growing up was some emius and ostages that escaped. Just

0:25:37.119 --> 0:25:39.199
<v Speaker 2>occasionally you'd run into one if you're in the right

0:25:39.240 --> 0:25:40.680
<v Speaker 2>place at the right time. You know, you're going through

0:25:40.720 --> 0:25:41.200
<v Speaker 2>the woods.

0:25:41.760 --> 0:25:44.400
<v Speaker 3>It's just ready to have my whole world rock finding

0:25:44.440 --> 0:25:46.160
<v Speaker 3>out that there's English warthogs.

0:25:46.240 --> 0:25:49.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you guys up to up there, that would be great.

0:25:49.000 --> 0:25:51.360
<v Speaker 2>I don't know how long they'd survive. I mean, we

0:25:51.480 --> 0:25:54.800
<v Speaker 2>had wild boar at one point, right, they thrived until

0:25:54.840 --> 0:25:57.120
<v Speaker 2>we probably ate them all May's face.

0:25:57.160 --> 0:25:59.439
<v Speaker 3>I don't think I've ever really looked a warthog up

0:25:59.480 --> 0:26:02.600
<v Speaker 3>close before. That's there's a lot going on and I

0:26:02.600 --> 0:26:04.639
<v Speaker 3>would not want to hurl my body at any of it.

0:26:04.800 --> 0:26:08.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, they didn't get the name by accident. It's not

0:26:09.000 --> 0:26:12.480
<v Speaker 2>one of God's beautiful creatures. They're pretty mean that they'll

0:26:12.480 --> 0:26:14.600
<v Speaker 2>fuck you up. But yeah, you do wonder how the

0:26:14.640 --> 0:26:15.680
<v Speaker 2>face ended up like that.

0:26:15.920 --> 0:26:18.000
<v Speaker 3>I'm so surprised. There are not more holes than you.

0:26:18.440 --> 0:26:19.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean there are a lot. There have been

0:26:20.119 --> 0:26:22.159
<v Speaker 2>a lot of holes in me over the years. Like

0:26:22.880 --> 0:26:25.679
<v Speaker 2>when I get an X ray sometimes a person just laughs.

0:26:26.320 --> 0:26:29.240
<v Speaker 2>I've broken a lot of ribs. Yeah, I would not

0:26:29.320 --> 0:26:32.000
<v Speaker 2>advise doing that to have Alina or really any animal.

0:26:32.040 --> 0:26:35.480
<v Speaker 2>It's not kind to her animals because you think it's fun.

0:26:36.000 --> 0:26:38.440
<v Speaker 2>So don't do that. But yeah, I would advise if

0:26:38.480 --> 0:26:41.119
<v Speaker 2>you have a giant packory, get it into a breeding

0:26:41.160 --> 0:26:44.560
<v Speaker 2>program and then let it go like free Willy, jump

0:26:44.560 --> 0:26:48.960
<v Speaker 2>out of its enclosure and find a home for itself

0:26:49.400 --> 0:26:53.280
<v Speaker 2>among the fairways and greens of your local golf course. Molly,

0:26:53.359 --> 0:26:55.680
<v Speaker 2>thank you for joining me on my first podcast where

0:26:55.680 --> 0:26:58.160
<v Speaker 2>we talk about animals. I am still committed to one

0:26:58.240 --> 0:26:59.960
<v Speaker 2>day taking you to see a prong horn.

0:27:00.520 --> 0:27:01.760
<v Speaker 3>I want to see a wild animal.

0:27:02.080 --> 0:27:03.920
<v Speaker 2>Okay, we have a show budget for that. Now we're

0:27:04.359 --> 0:27:06.040
<v Speaker 2>going to see so many. We will go on a

0:27:06.080 --> 0:27:07.840
<v Speaker 2>pronghorn extravagance.

0:27:08.160 --> 0:27:10.000
<v Speaker 3>I want to see a Halina. Just take me to too.

0:27:10.000 --> 0:27:12.040
<v Speaker 2>So yeah we could. Yeah, we could go to sus

0:27:12.080 --> 0:27:14.640
<v Speaker 2>On and stay in a suburban motel and you will

0:27:14.640 --> 0:27:16.720
<v Speaker 2>see a have Alena. I've never seen one really, Okay,

0:27:16.800 --> 0:27:19.720
<v Speaker 2>yeah we'll maybe we'll recreate my bike accident.

0:27:19.760 --> 0:27:20.960
<v Speaker 3>We'll go vandalize a golf course.

0:27:21.040 --> 0:27:22.879
<v Speaker 2>Yeah yeah, Well we can just watch them with the thing.

0:27:22.920 --> 0:27:25.239
<v Speaker 2>It's this zero risk. You just watch them, watch them,

0:27:25.280 --> 0:27:27.479
<v Speaker 2>go enjoy them. Maybe we could get one of those

0:27:27.480 --> 0:27:31.400
<v Speaker 2>little carts and drive around behind them or something. Get

0:27:31.400 --> 0:27:32.800
<v Speaker 2>a couple of monsters.

0:27:32.359 --> 0:27:33.959
<v Speaker 3>I would I would pivot to video for that.

0:27:34.160 --> 0:27:36.720
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, that'll be the one. The one time you

0:27:36.760 --> 0:27:39.480
<v Speaker 2>will see me streaming is when I'm when I'm with

0:27:39.520 --> 0:27:41.160
<v Speaker 2>the have Aolino as they fuck up the golf course.

0:27:41.400 --> 0:27:43.800
<v Speaker 2>Would you like to plug your podcast, Molly where people

0:27:43.800 --> 0:27:46.640
<v Speaker 2>can learn more about other weird little guys that are

0:27:46.640 --> 0:27:47.680
<v Speaker 2>not you know, poor signed?

0:27:47.920 --> 0:27:49.679
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah if you. If you think a peckory is

0:27:49.920 --> 0:27:52.679
<v Speaker 3>a weird little friend, what about a weird little monster.

0:27:54.480 --> 0:27:58.000
<v Speaker 3>My show Weird Little Guys is about right wing political violence.

0:27:58.000 --> 0:27:59.800
<v Speaker 3>It's not as fun as a little not big.

0:28:00.240 --> 0:28:02.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but it's great. It's a lovely podcast. You do

0:28:02.080 --> 0:28:03.960
<v Speaker 2>a very good job with it, and people love it.

0:28:04.040 --> 0:28:07.000
<v Speaker 2>They can never get enough Weird Little Guys. So you

0:28:07.000 --> 0:28:07.840
<v Speaker 2>should listen to that.

0:28:08.080 --> 0:28:10.639
<v Speaker 3>So an ASMR experience about the clan.

0:28:12.000 --> 0:28:14.040
<v Speaker 2>We could have made this an ASMR experience if I

0:28:14.080 --> 0:28:17.040
<v Speaker 2>had more have Alina recording, maybe I'll ask my friends

0:28:17.040 --> 0:28:20.399
<v Speaker 2>to record. So we hope you'll subscribe. We're not just

0:28:20.440 --> 0:28:22.360
<v Speaker 2>going to talk about funny little animals. It's just nice

0:28:22.359 --> 0:28:24.520
<v Speaker 2>to talk about a funny little animal. We are also

0:28:24.560 --> 0:28:27.520
<v Speaker 2>going to talk about some serious things. Our next episode,

0:28:27.560 --> 0:28:32.199
<v Speaker 2>we'll look at cyclospora, which is the diarrhea parasite that

0:28:32.320 --> 0:28:34.800
<v Speaker 2>is spreading through the Midwest. Oh yeah, we're going to

0:28:34.800 --> 0:28:38.040
<v Speaker 2>talk about what we can learn about agricultural labor rights

0:28:38.080 --> 0:28:41.719
<v Speaker 2>from cyclosporer. Then we're going to look at fire, because

0:28:41.880 --> 0:28:45.600
<v Speaker 2>fire is coming for all of us, including the golf courses,

0:28:45.960 --> 0:28:47.920
<v Speaker 2>and we're going to talk about what you should do

0:28:47.960 --> 0:28:49.719
<v Speaker 2>when you get that little buzz buzz buzz on your

0:28:49.720 --> 0:28:52.680
<v Speaker 2>phone and it says level three go now. And then

0:28:52.720 --> 0:28:54.360
<v Speaker 2>we're going to talk about what we can all learn

0:28:54.520 --> 0:28:57.960
<v Speaker 2>from indigenous fire knowledge. So I hope you'll subscribe and

0:28:58.280 --> 0:29:01.320
<v Speaker 2>we will be dropping episode to every We have two

0:29:01.440 --> 0:29:03.680
<v Speaker 2>this week if you're listening on the week this comes out.

0:29:03.800 --> 0:29:06.880
<v Speaker 2>After that, we will only have one, I'm afraid. Oh. Also, yes,

0:29:06.960 --> 0:29:09.040
<v Speaker 2>you can email us if you want to. If you

0:29:09.120 --> 0:29:10.920
<v Speaker 2>have a picture of a peckery.

0:29:10.680 --> 0:29:13.000
<v Speaker 3>Or a video of one swimming, Yeah, video of one.

0:29:12.920 --> 0:29:15.080
<v Speaker 2>Swimming, I'd love to see it, or one going after

0:29:15.080 --> 0:29:18.360
<v Speaker 2>a golf course, you can email us. Natural Causes pod

0:29:18.760 --> 0:29:20.320
<v Speaker 2>at proton dot me.

0:29:23.160 --> 0:29:25.880
<v Speaker 1>Natural Causes the production of cool Zone Media. For more

0:29:25.920 --> 0:29:29.240
<v Speaker 1>podcasts from cool Zone Media, visit our website cool Zonemedia

0:29:29.280 --> 0:29:31.720
<v Speaker 1>dot com. Or check us out on the iHeartRadio app,

0:29:31.760 --> 0:29:35.040
<v Speaker 1>Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. You can

0:29:35.080 --> 0:29:38.600
<v Speaker 1>find sources for natural causes listened directly in episode descriptions.

0:29:38.760 --> 0:29:39.560
<v Speaker 3>Thanks for listening.