WEBVTT - We Gotta Make More Episodes than "Martin" (100th Episode!) 0:00:01.680 --> 0:00:05.280 In Italian food. I prioritize the lighter sauces I do. 0:00:06.000 --> 0:00:09.480 I'm colorless. That's that's tough to hear. I'm I'm a 0:00:09.520 --> 0:00:13.160 red sauceman myself. Now I'm like white sauce and then pesto, 0:00:13.480 --> 0:00:16.360 and then and then red sauce. You funk around with 0:00:16.400 --> 0:00:19.600 that vodka sauce ever a little bit. Vodka sauce is good. 0:00:19.640 --> 0:00:25.280 That's red yea. Yeah, so it's still lighter, it's reddish. 0:00:25.640 --> 0:00:28.840 Coming to ABC this fall, I don't want any I 0:00:29.400 --> 0:00:35.239 don't want any of that darky sauce. I love that 0:00:35.360 --> 0:00:37.560 you said that, but after you looked over your shoulder 0:00:37.600 --> 0:00:44.520 at your Martin d v D holp T. Campbell doesn't 0:00:44.560 --> 0:00:46.919 hear me. I don't want any darky sauce. I don't. 0:00:47.040 --> 0:01:09.600 She didn't either. Racists mostly money stuff I can't tell me. 0:01:12.520 --> 0:01:16.160 Welcome to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told Me, 0:01:16.480 --> 0:01:20.320 the podcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets 0:01:20.319 --> 0:01:23.840 of black conspiracy theories and we finally work to prove 0:01:23.880 --> 0:01:26.119 that if you cut open the keyloid on the back 0:01:26.160 --> 0:01:30.120 of the greens neck, it will in fact bleed coking crown. 0:01:33.920 --> 0:01:36.559 I hear that. I hear that, and I believe that 0:01:36.600 --> 0:01:38.880 there's no doubt in my mind that's what it looks like. 0:01:38.880 --> 0:01:42.000 It's full of it seems like it not only will 0:01:42.040 --> 0:01:44.919 it bleed coking crown, but there'll be a little bag 0:01:44.920 --> 0:01:50.280 in there too, like a little purple bag. The bag 0:01:50.360 --> 0:02:01.560 comes out of the key low oh thing. I'm one 0:02:01.600 --> 0:02:05.360 of your host Langston Kerman, and I'm David. Yeah, and 0:02:05.400 --> 0:02:10.840 we're we're here. We're here, David celebrating our one hundredth episode. 0:02:10.919 --> 0:02:14.600 This is the one hundred epithede at one hundredth episode 0:02:14.600 --> 0:02:16.200 of My Mama told me, And if I get the 0:02:16.200 --> 0:02:18.839 words right, we'll celebrate. That's a big deal. I don't 0:02:18.840 --> 0:02:22.080 I don't think Martin got a hundred episodes? Did Martin? 0:02:22.120 --> 0:02:24.800 I get a hundred episodes? I'm looking at the DVD 0:02:24.880 --> 0:02:35.480 collection on my show. You guys can't see this, um 0:02:36.080 --> 0:02:40.399 but David, David could not have turned cleaner and and 0:02:40.440 --> 0:02:44.359 more clearly to the DVD collection. It's as if he 0:02:44.440 --> 0:02:46.920 like looks at it every day like some sort of 0:02:47.480 --> 0:02:50.560 almost memorial for Martin. I'm not sure what it is. Well, 0:02:50.560 --> 0:02:53.560 it's my DVD section. I have Martin and then I 0:02:53.600 --> 0:02:56.480 have Meteor Man because that's harder to find than you 0:02:56.520 --> 0:03:00.480 would think. Oh, Martin got a hundred and thirty two episodes, 0:03:00.639 --> 0:03:02.400 so we we've got some work to do if we're 0:03:02.400 --> 0:03:04.520 gonna keep up with Martin. All I'm trying to do is, 0:03:04.560 --> 0:03:08.560 ever do is catch Martin? Catch Martin and uh and 0:03:08.680 --> 0:03:11.600 maybe don't hurt Tisha Campbell in the process. No, No, 0:03:11.760 --> 0:03:17.160 we love t Sha, we love Dwayne. Now they're broken up. 0:03:17.880 --> 0:03:21.040 She really leaned into that singing career when they split 0:03:21.160 --> 0:03:24.840 and and that wasn't great. I feel like the time 0:03:24.960 --> 0:03:29.120 is not now she has now you're fifty, baby girl. Stop, 0:03:29.240 --> 0:03:31.679 it's okay, it's okay. You don't need a single. We 0:03:31.720 --> 0:03:35.000 don't need a single. We don't need it. And frankly, 0:03:35.360 --> 0:03:38.440 she's proven herself. And this is what's so disappointing for me, 0:03:38.520 --> 0:03:41.160 at least with Tisha Campbell, is she's proven herself to 0:03:41.200 --> 0:03:45.640 be one of the greatest sitcom actress actresses in history. 0:03:45.760 --> 0:03:49.160 She's been a part of some fucking classics. I don't 0:03:49.240 --> 0:03:52.480 need you to go make mediocre music. I need you 0:03:52.640 --> 0:03:56.760 paired alongside one other black man who people are gonna 0:03:56.840 --> 0:04:00.600 say it is difficult at times, Pam Pam if her 0:04:00.680 --> 0:04:07.800 and Pam toward like various county fairs, barber shop openings, 0:04:10.200 --> 0:04:12.800 raising Kine openings, things like that. I would I would 0:04:12.800 --> 0:04:21.560 be into that. I love the idea of somebody opening 0:04:21.560 --> 0:04:27.839 a Raisin Kane and mean like and now performance from 0:04:27.880 --> 0:04:36.200 Pam and Gina, y'all, that's everything I want in to day. 0:04:37.120 --> 0:04:39.800 They come out and they do. They do all their classics, 0:04:39.839 --> 0:04:43.120 they do some stuff from Little Shop of Horse met them, 0:04:43.600 --> 0:04:46.200 and then they go into they maybe they do that 0:04:46.320 --> 0:04:50.680 everybody loves everybody hates Chris song, just as because that's 0:04:50.680 --> 0:04:53.479 in the wheelhouse, I suppose. And then they close it 0:04:53.480 --> 0:04:58.160 out with with I guess, I don't know, riffing. I 0:04:58.279 --> 0:05:00.640 think they do some riffing. I think close it out 0:05:00.640 --> 0:05:04.320 with like an end Vogue song or something. Uh they 0:05:04.360 --> 0:05:08.800 started doing cover okay, I hear you, Yeah, yeah, because 0:05:08.800 --> 0:05:11.839 they're both of their catalogs are not that deep. No, 0:05:11.960 --> 0:05:14.719 they don't have very much. In fact, even in the list, 0:05:14.839 --> 0:05:17.400 I gave away a song that does not belong to 0:05:17.480 --> 0:05:23.479 either of them. So that's a good song though that 0:05:23.480 --> 0:05:26.680 everybody hates Chris song. It's you know what, it's I 0:05:26.720 --> 0:05:30.560 think ten seconds long. But the motherfucker's was nailing it. 0:05:30.680 --> 0:05:33.960 All you need, all you need, You just need a 0:05:33.960 --> 0:05:37.120 little taste. Yeah, you know that was actually sang by 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:40.440 the Weather Girls, the same ladies who's sang it's raining? Man? 0:05:41.160 --> 0:05:50.520 Is that true? I don't know. You have Martin DVDs 0:05:50.560 --> 0:05:54.200 on your wall. I thought maybe this was this is 0:05:54.240 --> 0:05:56.960 just a little tidbit that you had sitting in your pocket. No, 0:05:57.120 --> 0:06:00.240 it sounds like something I would know. It's out us. 0:06:00.440 --> 0:06:04.640 I was convinced, and I'm I'm a fool. You're not, 0:06:04.800 --> 0:06:06.880 You're not, You're You're fine, You're fine. That was crazy. 0:06:07.360 --> 0:06:11.000 I abused my power, and I understand, well, we we 0:06:11.160 --> 0:06:15.560 can't bullshit much longer about to Sheena Arnold and Titia Campbell, 0:06:16.279 --> 0:06:21.039 both lovely classic actresses and in the black sitcom space. 0:06:21.200 --> 0:06:25.360 But today we are celebrating a hundred episodes of the 0:06:25.440 --> 0:06:28.800 show that the centennial if if I don't know what 0:06:28.960 --> 0:06:32.520 centennial means, And so with that, I thought the best 0:06:32.600 --> 0:06:35.080 way for us to celebrate because you haven't been here 0:06:35.080 --> 0:06:37.560 at the entire time. In fact, you're you're a much 0:06:37.640 --> 0:06:40.960 more recent add to the journey of my Mama told me, 0:06:41.040 --> 0:06:44.240 although you were on one of our very very earliest episodes. 0:06:44.360 --> 0:06:51.400 I was on early they forgot about Tren then a 0:06:51.480 --> 0:06:54.160 white man made a song about not forgetting about it, 0:06:54.880 --> 0:06:59.400 and here you are again. But I thought, I thought 0:06:59.440 --> 0:07:02.160 a fun journey for us to take on together is 0:07:02.240 --> 0:07:06.960 to go back and look at some of our favorite topics, 0:07:07.160 --> 0:07:09.520 the the topics that sort of came up early in 0:07:09.600 --> 0:07:12.520 the in the rolodecks of our bullshit here at my 0:07:12.640 --> 0:07:15.040 Mama told me. And we'll just talk about him some 0:07:15.200 --> 0:07:18.160 things you probably haven't gotten a chance to hear. And 0:07:18.240 --> 0:07:20.520 so I'm excited to hear all of your thoughts borri 0:07:20.640 --> 0:07:24.320 on on on all these different subjects. Something to bring 0:07:24.400 --> 0:07:27.520 it out, I know you do. And what better way 0:07:27.560 --> 0:07:30.320 to start. And this will be exciting for our listeners 0:07:30.440 --> 0:07:35.160 because this is actually the subject of a long lost episode, 0:07:35.200 --> 0:07:38.160 an episode that never actually made it to air. Our 0:07:38.320 --> 0:07:43.280 earliest guest, who who technically was not our earliest guests recorded, 0:07:43.320 --> 0:07:46.120 but our earliest guest was Will Miles. I'm a big 0:07:46.200 --> 0:07:49.640 fan of him. I know you know him well Chicago. 0:07:50.520 --> 0:08:01.800 Hell yeah, do that for every person I list. But 0:08:02.040 --> 0:08:05.800 Will actually did our our test pilot for the show. 0:08:05.960 --> 0:08:09.200 And with the test pilot, he came with a theory 0:08:09.360 --> 0:08:11.400 that I had never heard before and up to this 0:08:11.600 --> 0:08:13.760 date to have not heard again since he said, my 0:08:13.920 --> 0:08:17.440 mama told me the mail is being used to send 0:08:17.560 --> 0:08:23.680 poisonous perfume samples, possibly government terrorism. Okay, there's a lot 0:08:23.760 --> 0:08:26.440 to unpack here. Yeah, yeah, it's not it's not a 0:08:26.520 --> 0:08:32.360 quick one, because this is what was the last time 0:08:32.400 --> 0:08:38.400 you got a magazine with a perfume sample? That's that's 0:08:38.440 --> 0:08:45.680 a big question that magazine he's still getting where he's 0:08:45.760 --> 0:08:50.760 like like, at best, Look, the only magazine subscriptions I 0:08:50.840 --> 0:08:54.040 have were completely by accident at this point, do you 0:08:54.120 --> 0:08:55.800 know what I mean? Like you bought an item and 0:08:55.840 --> 0:08:58.160 then they're like, well, technically by buying this, you get 0:08:58.200 --> 0:09:00.959 a subscription to our our magazin thing. I have a 0:09:01.080 --> 0:09:05.439 GQ magazine subscription that I bought because I try to 0:09:05.520 --> 0:09:07.959 pretend myself to myself that I was that kind of 0:09:08.040 --> 0:09:11.040 a guy. And now I still still have it and 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:14.480 it still comes every week. But I don't whoa what 0:09:14.800 --> 0:09:17.920 what what prompted g Q? What? What what happened where 0:09:17.960 --> 0:09:19.240 you were? Like I think I'm gonna be a g 0:09:19.440 --> 0:09:21.959 Q do Sometimes I'm on stone on the internet, just 0:09:22.160 --> 0:09:25.480 like you know what, I don't know about you know 0:09:25.720 --> 0:09:29.600 different fragrances and fashion trends. Who could keep me up 0:09:29.679 --> 0:09:33.760 on that? You know what I mean? Like, I don't, 0:09:33.800 --> 0:09:36.480 I don't know. I I need some kind of an 0:09:36.520 --> 0:09:41.240 aggregate to a adult manhood and I thought that I 0:09:41.360 --> 0:09:44.120 thought that g Q would be that, and I have 0:09:44.320 --> 0:09:47.120 not cracked. I think I cracked open one like six 0:09:47.200 --> 0:09:52.360 months ago. That's it. Whoa embarrassing, you know what it is? 0:09:53.559 --> 0:09:57.640 I I feel like with g Q, I'm not convinced 0:09:57.679 --> 0:10:00.320 that I'm never gonna look the way that these guys look, 0:10:00.960 --> 0:10:04.199 and so it intimidates me. If I'm being honest, I'm 0:10:04.240 --> 0:10:07.320 looking at these guys and ensure those outfits are cool. 0:10:07.480 --> 0:10:09.920 But are they would they be cool on me? I'm 0:10:10.000 --> 0:10:12.600 going to talk shit in a bar. I ain't really 0:10:12.640 --> 0:10:16.200 about to do all this cool stuff in bathtubs, in suits, 0:10:16.559 --> 0:10:18.800 you know what I mean? They're in like speedboats with 0:10:18.920 --> 0:10:23.160 wood paneling. M hmm. Like every speedboat that I'm on 0:10:23.320 --> 0:10:27.160 has like neon colors. Yeah, I'm I'm a plastic speedboat man, 0:10:27.800 --> 0:10:30.520 big time, big time. It has like a dumb name, 0:10:31.280 --> 0:10:39.920 like yeah, people are smoking like black and milds on 0:10:40.040 --> 0:10:42.160 it like that's yeah, that's the problem with g Q 0:10:42.320 --> 0:10:44.280 it's it's it's a little too They mean like a 0:10:45.000 --> 0:10:47.959 may need like a lower level GQ like for for 0:10:48.120 --> 0:10:53.160 like not not gentlemen, but just like so I don't 0:10:53.160 --> 0:10:57.280 know what the what's step below gentleman? Right is there 0:10:58.320 --> 0:11:01.280 is there a term for below gentleman. I think that's 0:11:01.360 --> 0:11:05.319 called middle manager. We need like the middle managers quarterly, 0:11:05.960 --> 0:11:08.480 like you got some bread, You got some bread, you 0:11:08.559 --> 0:11:11.679 got like your your TV is wall mounted, but you 0:11:11.760 --> 0:11:16.960 don't necessarily have health insurance like those guys. It's wall mounted, 0:11:17.080 --> 0:11:20.240 but it's still got those cords underneath it. And pay 0:11:20.360 --> 0:11:22.559 for the tuck now you didn't get it tucked in. 0:11:22.800 --> 0:11:26.840 So here we are and and yeah, you you probably 0:11:27.000 --> 0:11:29.360 want to see what what fashion you can pull off. 0:11:29.559 --> 0:11:31.760 That's what I That's all I want, man, that's all 0:11:31.800 --> 0:11:35.000 I want. I like that. I like that for you. 0:11:35.200 --> 0:11:38.120 And and to that, I think in your magazine, at 0:11:38.200 --> 0:11:41.520 least by by your suggestion, I'm assuming they would not 0:11:41.640 --> 0:11:45.400 be putting the perfume samples and cologne samples inside of it. 0:11:45.679 --> 0:11:47.599 Here's the thing. And I'm not gonna sit here and 0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:49.559 lie to you like I've never tried to use the 0:11:49.640 --> 0:11:52.280 cologne sample and pass it off his cologne I'm wearing. 0:11:52.880 --> 0:11:59.439 It just doesn't work, man, Right, It's just it's not enough. Yeah, 0:11:59.520 --> 0:12:01.800 they don't of you a lot. It's like one spray. 0:12:02.000 --> 0:12:03.439 I got a lot of I got a lot of 0:12:03.480 --> 0:12:09.720 real estate to cover. Yeah, these crops are gonna they're 0:12:09.720 --> 0:12:12.800 gonna need a little more, a little more greening than that. 0:12:13.120 --> 0:12:16.640 Come on, one spray my whole body. But that's why 0:12:16.679 --> 0:12:19.640 I wonder what he like, who has well must be 0:12:19.679 --> 0:12:23.840 getting like black tail or something like what magazine still has. 0:12:25.000 --> 0:12:28.439 What's fascinating is and this is something he and I 0:12:28.600 --> 0:12:32.360 talked about when we originally had this conversation, but it 0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:35.920 actually was all this, this theory, this fear was all 0:12:36.040 --> 0:12:39.800 started from a an email that was sort of circulating. 0:12:39.880 --> 0:12:42.400 This is back when emails used to circulate, if that 0:12:42.480 --> 0:12:46.040 makes sense. And the email reads and I'm gonna read 0:12:46.080 --> 0:12:50.439 it verbet and it goes urgent news from Glenn Eagle's Hospital, 0:12:50.800 --> 0:12:54.640 Urgent with five exclamation points after that. Seven women have 0:12:54.840 --> 0:12:58.559 died after inhaling a free perfume sample that was mailed 0:12:58.600 --> 0:13:02.240 to them. The product was poisonous if you received free 0:13:02.280 --> 0:13:06.520 samples in the mail, such as lotions, perfumes, diapers, et cetera. 0:13:06.720 --> 0:13:09.560 Throw them away. The government is afraid that this might 0:13:09.640 --> 0:13:12.640 be another terrorist act. They will not announce it in 0:13:12.760 --> 0:13:15.200 the news because they do not want to create panic 0:13:15.320 --> 0:13:18.920 or give the terrorists and new ideas. Send this forward 0:13:18.960 --> 0:13:22.320 to all your friends and family members. Diane J. Ford, 0:13:22.720 --> 0:13:25.680 Office of the Free of the Chief of Police, Office 0:13:25.800 --> 0:13:30.720 of Risk Management, one O one M Street, s W Washington, 0:13:30.960 --> 0:13:40.040 d C. First of all, people are getting perfumes, lotions 0:13:40.120 --> 0:13:43.240 and diapers samples in the mail. I think, I think 0:13:43.280 --> 0:13:46.720 in the late nineties we were mailing everything. That's true, 0:13:46.800 --> 0:13:49.400 we weren't. We were so before nine eleven, we were 0:13:49.480 --> 0:13:54.720 so flipping yeah, we didn't give a funk who got Yeah, 0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:56.839 just with this big old tub of lotion in the 0:13:56.920 --> 0:14:02.839 mail of these as you niggas figure it out. And 0:14:02.960 --> 0:14:05.439 now we're very careful to your point. Now it's you 0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:08.280 barely can spray yourself with the cologne. But back then 0:14:08.360 --> 0:14:11.080 you get a whole You get a whole dre card 0:14:11.160 --> 0:14:14.439 noir in the mail. Call it a sample. Send me 0:14:14.559 --> 0:14:20.480 some of that awkward digio. Yeah six bucks? What happened 0:14:20.520 --> 0:14:23.920 to us America? You know, we have so many sense 0:14:25.440 --> 0:14:27.760 I feel like poor people don't wear cologne anymore, and 0:14:27.840 --> 0:14:32.040 that's a big issue. Mm hmm. What what was your 0:14:32.280 --> 0:14:35.920 your go to cologne when you were a young, upstart, 0:14:36.000 --> 0:14:43.480 a young man figuring it out. Ah, I had a 0:14:43.560 --> 0:14:51.080 bottle of Adidas Oh No, that I got for Christmas 0:14:51.160 --> 0:14:53.440 and one of those packs, you know how it would 0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:58.160 be like the Adida's cologne, the Adida's deodorant, and then 0:14:58.280 --> 0:15:01.400 like a pair of Adidas sock Of course, I got 0:15:01.520 --> 0:15:04.280 like one of those and I used that That was 0:15:04.400 --> 0:15:09.760 probably like eight to ninth or tenth grade. And then 0:15:10.120 --> 0:15:17.160 I got Aquadiggio because this girl named a Lana had 0:15:17.200 --> 0:15:19.160 told me that it smells really good. And then that 0:15:20.040 --> 0:15:22.160 and that kind of carried me to my early twenties. 0:15:22.200 --> 0:15:26.720 And then I was thugging no sense, just raw dog 0:15:26.800 --> 0:15:29.600 out in the wind, just trying to live. Man. And 0:15:30.080 --> 0:15:33.360 now tell me this, did Alanna notice when you bought 0:15:33.440 --> 0:15:38.840 the Aquadigio? This fuck? That's that's hard to hear. She 0:15:39.040 --> 0:15:43.640 was elevated, man, she had She like, yeah, it wasn't 0:15:44.160 --> 0:15:49.720 it was never meant to be. You give your heart 0:15:49.840 --> 0:15:52.960 to these people and they don't. They don't give it back, 0:15:53.200 --> 0:15:56.000 you know, they truly don't like the fact that you 0:15:56.160 --> 0:15:58.600 remember she was the one that planted this seed in 0:15:58.680 --> 0:16:01.640 your head is always gonna ache at you. And she's 0:16:01.680 --> 0:16:03.960 not gonna be like, damn, I told David to wear that, 0:16:04.120 --> 0:16:07.320 and he never I never complimented in him on how 0:16:07.400 --> 0:16:10.360 well he smells. You know what I mean. I've I've 0:16:10.440 --> 0:16:15.560 thought about it realistically. I don't think she would remember me. That's' 0:16:17.080 --> 0:16:19.440 and I've been on TV. What do you think I 0:16:19.560 --> 0:16:21.520 did it a lot? Do you think I need it 0:16:21.560 --> 0:16:24.680 for the money? No, it doesn't pay that much if 0:16:24.720 --> 0:16:32.120 you're not a star. Realized that. But it's a hundred 0:16:32.200 --> 0:16:34.360 percent scales. You know how many times? You know how 0:16:34.400 --> 0:16:36.320 many bit parts I gotta do to buy a car? 0:16:37.640 --> 0:16:42.240 Probably sixty. I just do it. So Alanna, we'll see. 0:16:42.560 --> 0:16:45.440 So maybe Alanna is sitting down in her home and 0:16:45.600 --> 0:16:49.320 she never knows, but I'm hoping maybe she watches Pause 0:16:49.360 --> 0:16:53.920 with Sam Jane. She's like, Wow, i've seen that guy before. 0:16:54.200 --> 0:16:57.920 I recognize I recognized his free wheeling feelings about drugs. 0:16:58.520 --> 0:17:01.360 And then you know, she looks yea and then oh ship, 0:17:01.480 --> 0:17:05.240 he's verified, and then she sa and I don't respond, 0:17:05.800 --> 0:17:08.720 good for you, Dad, don't give her that. I hope 0:17:08.760 --> 0:17:11.240 that she watches Pause. She goes. I had a feeling 0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:15.119 David would do crack someday. But but I still I 0:17:15.440 --> 0:17:19.480 still have feelings for him. I still I still feel 0:17:19.520 --> 0:17:21.960 like it's unrequited love. I'm going to send him a 0:17:22.040 --> 0:17:26.920 message and then you big timer hard that bitch. Oh 0:17:27.200 --> 0:17:31.080 you're blocking her. She can't even see you anymore. Tumb finger. 0:17:31.800 --> 0:17:39.680 Oh shit, no, you had a chance. So one of 0:17:39.760 --> 0:17:42.919 the things that that we discovered in sort of talking 0:17:43.000 --> 0:17:47.200 about this apparent conspiracy theory is that the the email 0:17:47.400 --> 0:17:50.520 was completely made up, and uh, it was sort of 0:17:50.800 --> 0:17:54.320 rooted in a lot of like the hoax and energy 0:17:54.480 --> 0:17:58.639 that was born out of Nina eleven and the anthrax 0:17:58.760 --> 0:18:02.399 scare right that I in this this wasn't there was 0:18:02.480 --> 0:18:05.280 no evidence of it actually being real. These seven women, 0:18:05.400 --> 0:18:08.959 six women whatever it was, dying in this hospital from 0:18:09.040 --> 0:18:12.879 sniffing perfume. But in sort of riding the anthrax waves, 0:18:13.000 --> 0:18:15.600 some idiot at home was like, I'm gonna start telling 0:18:15.680 --> 0:18:18.920 people their perfume samples or poisonous and see what that does. 0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:23.239 And it didn't do anything. I mean, it stopped perfume samples, right, 0:18:23.840 --> 0:18:26.800 it did. It certainly put a little bit of a 0:18:26.880 --> 0:18:29.880 bind on the perfume samples. I have got no free 0:18:29.960 --> 0:18:34.040 perfume because now that I think about it, I do remember, 0:18:34.119 --> 0:18:37.520 not me, but my mom. It would be that tiny bottle, 0:18:38.600 --> 0:18:40.720 you know what I'm talking about. Ye, Like it'd be 0:18:40.800 --> 0:18:44.120 like that tall and like really thin. Yeah, I haven't 0:18:44.160 --> 0:18:46.240 seen any of those since. I mean I think that 0:18:46.440 --> 0:18:49.720 it's I think it's since leven. Yeah, I mean I 0:18:50.160 --> 0:18:52.080 feel like back then you could get a sample and 0:18:52.160 --> 0:18:54.320 get on an airplane with a sample in your pocket. 0:18:54.400 --> 0:18:56.760 And now they're like these are this is just gonna 0:18:56.760 --> 0:18:59.119 get people in trouble in every way possible. You can 0:18:59.160 --> 0:19:07.879 get on an airplane pocket knives, aerosols, your shoes, everything. Man, 0:19:07.960 --> 0:19:12.600 it's like going to jail. Give me a bill. Well, 0:19:12.640 --> 0:19:18.639 not me, I have clear, but for poor people, Like 0:19:18.800 --> 0:19:21.080 these seats are too small, you're gonna want to kill yourself. 0:19:21.160 --> 0:19:25.720 Give me a goddamn bill. No shoelaces. That's also why 0:19:25.720 --> 0:19:28.640 I flying crocs. I gotta I got a whole system. Yeah, 0:19:28.800 --> 0:19:31.840 I'm a big flip flop flyer. Now you have to 0:19:32.240 --> 0:19:34.440 you have to like to get and I'm not like 0:19:34.560 --> 0:19:36.520 a savage, right, like I got socks on. I'm not 0:19:36.560 --> 0:19:39.200 like a white person, But like you have to get through. 0:19:40.200 --> 0:19:43.680 You just have to get through fast, you know. It 0:19:43.760 --> 0:19:45.920 makes everything easier, and it also makes it so you 0:19:45.960 --> 0:19:49.879 don't feel like some weird urge to kick off your shoes, which, uh, 0:19:50.359 --> 0:19:53.000 which I've done, and frankly is real. It's real nice. 0:19:53.040 --> 0:19:55.960 But I also feel terribly ashamed afterwards. Yeah, you should 0:19:56.000 --> 0:19:58.720 feel bad. That's one thing you should feel bad about. Yeah. No, 0:19:58.800 --> 0:20:00.960 I'm not proud of that at all. And uh, I 0:20:01.119 --> 0:20:03.200 blame my father. I would not I would not have. 0:20:03.359 --> 0:20:05.280 I would not have taken your first shoes off on 0:20:05.359 --> 0:20:08.760 the plane kind of guy. I don't want to be 0:20:08.880 --> 0:20:11.800 that guy. But if I'm being honest, once you do it, 0:20:11.920 --> 0:20:14.479 you're like, this is this is luxury that I've never 0:20:14.600 --> 0:20:18.560 imagined before. That's the freedom I I won't allow myself 0:20:18.600 --> 0:20:23.920 to taste. That's fair, you know. I think I think 0:20:23.960 --> 0:20:26.280 the truth is we could all afford a little bit 0:20:26.320 --> 0:20:28.720 more China in this country. There there should be a 0:20:28.760 --> 0:20:33.280 little bit more whoa whoa. There should be a little 0:20:33.320 --> 0:20:38.720 bit lebron James hard fastened rules of of ship that 0:20:38.840 --> 0:20:42.440 we have to follow, you know, we have we we 0:20:42.600 --> 0:20:46.520 can't just be free willing everywhere, you know, and if 0:20:46.560 --> 0:20:48.639 it means that I have to keep my goddamn shoes 0:20:48.720 --> 0:20:51.240 on when I'm flying through the air. I'd respect it, 0:20:51.359 --> 0:20:55.080 I'd serve, I respect, I appreciate that, because that is nasty. 0:20:55.160 --> 0:21:01.320 You can't. It's just it's bad for everything. All right, 0:21:01.400 --> 0:21:04.040 let's dig into another one. I feel like that we 0:21:04.119 --> 0:21:07.040 did everything that we could on that. It sounds like 0:21:07.160 --> 0:21:11.000 you don't believe it for one second. You, oh, you 0:21:11.080 --> 0:21:13.399 believe it? Kind of no, not even kind of oh, 0:21:13.480 --> 0:21:21.639 not even kind of great. Okay, this, oh, this was 0:21:21.720 --> 0:21:25.160 a fun one. Carl Tart our former guest, Carl Tart 0:21:25.280 --> 0:21:30.480 very funny man, crooked, crooked, litter, humpback, humpback, Oh you 0:21:30.640 --> 0:21:34.680 know you remembered. Okay, you're you're nice with it. But 0:21:34.840 --> 0:21:38.359 Carl Tired actually came to us with a conspiracy theory 0:21:38.960 --> 0:21:41.480 that he said, my mama told me, if you eat 0:21:41.560 --> 0:21:45.040 spaghetti from a woman you don't know, she might put 0:21:45.119 --> 0:21:47.600 her minstrel blood in it and put a hex on you. 0:21:49.040 --> 0:21:53.680 There's a Kevin Gates song about it, okay, And is 0:21:53.800 --> 0:21:59.080 that more convincing for you or less? I don't know. 0:22:02.040 --> 0:22:05.760 Does Kevin Gates believing something make you feel more solidified 0:22:05.840 --> 0:22:08.760 in it? Or or surely like you're trapped in a 0:22:09.000 --> 0:22:14.440 in a manic place. I am, I am ah, Okay, 0:22:14.680 --> 0:22:18.160 this is gonna get weird. I think that if there 0:22:18.320 --> 0:22:21.240 was a rapper who knew how to put out an 0:22:21.320 --> 0:22:26.359 evil spell or knew about evil spells, it would be 0:22:27.119 --> 0:22:31.840 Kevin Gates. M M. Now when you say that, are 0:22:31.880 --> 0:22:37.159 you referring specifically to male rappers, because if it's all rappers, 0:22:37.240 --> 0:22:40.160 I'm going to sail your banks every time. Oh that's 0:22:40.160 --> 0:22:42.960 a good point. That's a good that's a good point. 0:22:44.240 --> 0:22:47.520 I guess male rappers. I'm not sure, But anyways, that's 0:22:47.560 --> 0:22:49.840 not the point. Do I think that they could put 0:22:50.280 --> 0:22:56.560 could make you couci spaghetti and run your brain? I 0:22:56.640 --> 0:23:00.600 think that the ways of women are very mysterious and 0:23:00.720 --> 0:23:06.760 that I don't, man, I don't because it it's not 0:23:06.920 --> 0:23:11.639 like she's gonna make you a zombie if you eat it, right, No, 0:23:12.000 --> 0:23:14.320 I mean, I think the implication is that it's more 0:23:14.440 --> 0:23:17.919 like a love potion than it is like a uh 0:23:18.000 --> 0:23:22.040 and a full submission of your being, If that makes sense. 0:23:22.240 --> 0:23:25.600 That could be true. That it's pheromones, right, uh huh, 0:23:26.520 --> 0:23:28.879 that's what we're talking about, I think, so. I mean, 0:23:29.000 --> 0:23:31.560 I I truly was, I was gonna let you think 0:23:31.600 --> 0:23:34.639 it through. But then you're like, it's pheromones, right, go ahead, Okay, 0:23:34.720 --> 0:23:38.399 I'm just saying, because it's not only spaghetti, Spaghetti is 0:23:38.440 --> 0:23:42.600 just the easiest way to put right. I think they're 0:23:42.680 --> 0:23:45.680 The implication is that spaghetti is the best place to 0:23:45.800 --> 0:23:49.760 hide it because of the matching color of the menstrual 0:23:49.840 --> 0:23:53.720 blood to the pasta sauce. But you could also put 0:23:53.720 --> 0:23:56.399 it in your pizza, then I think she could. I 0:23:56.480 --> 0:24:00.280 think for specifically, black people were not known for making 0:24:01.160 --> 0:24:04.679 a ton of pizza, certainly at home. Like if if 0:24:04.720 --> 0:24:06.440 I go over a girl's house and she's like, I 0:24:06.560 --> 0:24:09.080 made you a pizza, I'll be like, bitch, what's wrong 0:24:09.119 --> 0:24:13.080 with you trying to trap me? Kevin Gates told me 0:24:13.160 --> 0:24:16.399 about this. You ain't Italian? What the fun is this? 0:24:23.400 --> 0:24:27.320 If she's making spaghetti, you're like, oh, yeah, yeah, it's nice. 0:24:28.000 --> 0:24:30.560 You know this is black. If it's black people spaghetti, 0:24:30.600 --> 0:24:32.600 it's cooked in one pot and this guy's sugar in 0:24:32.720 --> 0:24:35.320 it for some reason. Yeah, okay, this is just a 0:24:35.480 --> 0:24:37.840 regular black lady doing black people's stuff. And then do 0:24:37.920 --> 0:24:40.440 you ever get the fatass garlic bread that they're sell 0:24:40.480 --> 0:24:43.760 it safe way? Oh? Hell yeah? Yeah, man, that is good. 0:24:44.200 --> 0:24:48.840 That that Texas toast. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's good on spaghetti. 0:24:48.840 --> 0:24:51.320 We should just make some spaghetti after this. Honestly, we 0:24:51.359 --> 0:24:55.040 should just starting this podcast into uh Spaghetti Cooking Hour, 0:24:55.160 --> 0:24:59.120 Spaghetti appreciation. You know, weird thing about spaghetti? I refused 0:24:59.200 --> 0:25:04.880 to eat it and rest wrongs? Whoa why? Now? Tell 0:25:04.920 --> 0:25:07.080 me more? Is it doesn't have anything to do with 0:25:07.200 --> 0:25:10.440 menstrul blood. No. I think it's just I've had it 0:25:10.520 --> 0:25:12.240 at home so much. I'm not gonna go to the 0:25:12.680 --> 0:25:14.560 I'm not gonna go. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna 0:25:14.680 --> 0:25:17.720 dress up, go out to eat and give a tip 0:25:17.880 --> 0:25:25.040 for some Spaghetti's insane, that's insane. It does feel like 0:25:25.280 --> 0:25:29.680 the lowest wrong of like uh of starter foods. In 0:25:29.760 --> 0:25:32.639 a lot of ways, it's the cheapest pasta, it's the 0:25:32.760 --> 0:25:35.000 cheapest pasta, and it's also the one that we all 0:25:35.080 --> 0:25:38.040 feel the most confident even approaching. So it's like, yeah, 0:25:38.280 --> 0:25:40.600 I shouldn't pay a stranger to do this. I'm not 0:25:40.720 --> 0:25:45.560 paying anybody for spaghetti ever. M I do think that's 0:25:45.680 --> 0:25:48.920 why when you go to restaurants they often add like 0:25:49.040 --> 0:25:54.120 the bolon as the egg. Now, I think bolon as 0:25:54.240 --> 0:25:56.479 just means like it's like a meat sauce, if I'm 0:25:56.520 --> 0:25:59.679 not mistaken. And I think part of the reason they 0:26:00.080 --> 0:26:03.600 make it sound more Italian than it actually is is 0:26:03.640 --> 0:26:05.800