1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:02,760
Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John. We're the ancient

2
00:00:02,880 --> 00:00:06,040
Speaker 1: two Case Storytime podcast hosts, and we have some ancient

3
00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:08,160
Speaker 1: wisdom in the stories coming up. If you want to

4
00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:11,080
Speaker 1: hear the wisdom from two old heads that know more

5
00:00:11,119 --> 00:00:12,639
Speaker 1: than they know what to do with, you're gonna have

6
00:00:12,720 --> 00:00:15,239
Speaker 1: to wait for a quick message from our sponsors for

7
00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:16,520
Speaker 1: the next two minutes or so.

8
00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,640
Speaker 2: My fiance wore my wedding dress under the influence and

9
00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:22,560
Speaker 2: ruined it.

10
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:24,959
Speaker 3: Are you sure he wasn't slaying?

11
00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:29,680
Speaker 2: This sounds completely ridiculous, but it really happened, and I

12
00:00:29,720 --> 00:00:32,479
Speaker 2: can't stop thinking about it. Some people are telling me

13
00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:36,800
Speaker 2: I completely overreacted, and I'm starting to question myself. What

14
00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:38,240
Speaker 2: do you think he did?

15
00:00:38,400 --> 00:00:43,760
Speaker 3: I think you get drinky and he ripped Ooh yeah.

16
00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:46,360
Speaker 2: I'm twenty eight and was supposed to get married last

17
00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:49,479
Speaker 2: weekend to my fiancee, Nick, who's thirty. We've been together

18
00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:53,200
Speaker 2: for four years. He's funny and a little bit impulsive,

19
00:00:53,440 --> 00:00:55,640
Speaker 2: but I always thought he had a good judgment. He

20
00:00:55,760 --> 00:00:58,560
Speaker 2: drinks socially, but I've never seen him totally out of

21
00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:02,040
Speaker 2: control until now. By the way, this comes from Rude

22
00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:04,600
Speaker 2: Winter nine one, nine two, and if you want to

23
00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:06,640
Speaker 2: spit your own stories. Go to the rs slash Okay

24
00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:10,279
Speaker 2: story Time, Separate It, Shoe Dang. The night before our wedding,

25
00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:12,280
Speaker 2: I stayed at home with my sister and two of

26
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:16,080
Speaker 2: my bridesmaids for a relaxed night. Nick went out with

27
00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:18,679
Speaker 2: his groomsman. I expect him to come home tipsy at

28
00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:21,720
Speaker 2: most at around one thirty in the morning. He came

29
00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:28,920
Speaker 2: home absolutely schwated, slurring, stumbling, sweaty. I was brushing my

30
00:01:28,959 --> 00:01:31,120
Speaker 2: teeth when I heard him banging around the guest room.

31
00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:34,760
Speaker 2: When I went to check, I saw him dragging my

32
00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:36,880
Speaker 2: wedding dress out of the closet.

33
00:01:37,319 --> 00:01:40,120
Speaker 3: Uh no, but you've.

34
00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:42,760
Speaker 2: Caught him, so you can say, hey, stop.

35
00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:44,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, you go. What are you doing?

36
00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:48,720
Speaker 2: I asked what he was doing, and he just laughed

37
00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:52,400
Speaker 2: and said, you want to see how it felt to

38
00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:53,960
Speaker 2: be the bride?

39
00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:56,680
Speaker 3: Oh no, oh no.

40
00:01:57,320 --> 00:01:58,880
Speaker 2: I told him to put it back and not to

41
00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:02,760
Speaker 2: touch it, but he was not listening at all. Right

42
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:06,440
Speaker 2: in front of me, he stripped down completely and started

43
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:09,560
Speaker 2: putting on the dress. He could barely get it over

44
00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:12,400
Speaker 2: his body and kept tripping over the train. I didn't

45
00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:15,520
Speaker 2: know what to say. Then he dropped the floor in

46
00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:21,160
Speaker 2: the dress, still laughing. Then he went quiet, looked up

47
00:02:21,200 --> 00:02:24,440
Speaker 2: at me with a panic face and said, oh no,

48
00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:28,160
Speaker 2: he said, oh, oh no. A few seconds later, he

49
00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:29,160
Speaker 2: had an accident.

50
00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:32,079
Speaker 3: Oh no, diarrhea.

51
00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:36,200
Speaker 2: Oh no, I don't even want to read this part.

52
00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:37,880
Speaker 3: Oh it was bad.

53
00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,160
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna say it was bad.

54
00:02:39,280 --> 00:02:41,800
Speaker 3: Oh, it's so much worse than what I thought.

55
00:02:41,919 --> 00:02:43,480
Speaker 4: And I thought you ripped at the dress, but he

56
00:02:43,560 --> 00:02:44,600
Speaker 4: just ripped himself.

57
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:45,320
Speaker 3: He ripped.

58
00:02:45,639 --> 00:02:47,919
Speaker 2: That's maybe the worst possible option.

59
00:02:48,240 --> 00:02:53,240
Speaker 3: Oh man, that's gross. Just it was thrown into a furnace. Yeah,

60
00:02:53,320 --> 00:02:57,040
Speaker 3: and incinerated. Maybe that's better, might actually be better.

61
00:02:57,200 --> 00:02:59,720
Speaker 2: I stood there and shock while he started crying and

62
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:02,160
Speaker 2: try to get out of the dress, which only made

63
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:06,800
Speaker 2: more of a mess. Oh oh, it was everywhere.

64
00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:10,000
Speaker 4: It's no longer a white dress. It's a brown dress. Ye.

65
00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:14,200
Speaker 2: I told him to get in the shower and I left.

66
00:03:14,480 --> 00:03:16,840
Speaker 2: I drove straight to my mom's house and didn't take

67
00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:20,200
Speaker 2: any of his calls. The next morning, I called off

68
00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:24,440
Speaker 2: the wedding. The day of the wedding, I mean, how

69
00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:30,160
Speaker 2: do you get married after that? Well? You know what? Actually? No, Yeah,

70
00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:33,520
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, like, maybe that's like the final test.

71
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:36,440
Speaker 2: It's like the final test. If you still love the

72
00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:39,680
Speaker 2: person after that, it's like, okay, you guys are ready,

73
00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,200
Speaker 2: but that's pretty bad.

74
00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:45,960
Speaker 3: It's just like, why is this happening now? Now?

75
00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:46,920
Speaker 2: The day before?

76
00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:50,640
Speaker 3: Also is that typically when the bachelor party's supposed to

77
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:52,520
Speaker 3: happen the day before.

78
00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:54,080
Speaker 2: The weds I have to say, like, why was he

79
00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:57,760
Speaker 2: so like wasted the day before the wedding?

80
00:03:57,880 --> 00:03:58,160
Speaker 3: Yeah?

81
00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:00,000
Speaker 2: Why would you want to be hung over the day before?

82
00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:00,880
Speaker 3: What are we doing?

83
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:03,800
Speaker 4: I've done some stuff for like the bachelor party before

84
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:06,440
Speaker 4: the night before, but they're like, you know, don't do it,

85
00:04:06,520 --> 00:04:07,720
Speaker 4: don't go go out of control.

86
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:09,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a whole movie about that.

87
00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:12,200
Speaker 3: It's the weird part is that she said that he's

88
00:04:12,280 --> 00:04:14,760
Speaker 3: never done this or doesn't do this, and this is

89
00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:17,800
Speaker 3: like the first time she had ever even seen him

90
00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:18,520
Speaker 3: out of.

91
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:21,240
Speaker 4: Control, like the one time, the one time.

92
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,560
Speaker 3: Why is it happening the day before your wedding?

93
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:26,720
Speaker 2: Maybe it's like the pre wedding jitters and it just got.

94
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:30,640
Speaker 4: No now it's a pre wedding. Oh man, I can't

95
00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:31,080
Speaker 4: say it.

96
00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:34,920
Speaker 2: Since then, Nick has apologized over and over. He said

97
00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:38,360
Speaker 2: he blacked out and barely remembers what happened. His family

98
00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:41,240
Speaker 2: is furious with me and saying, I'm throwing away a

99
00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:44,679
Speaker 2: great relationship over a wasted mistake. Some of my friends

100
00:04:44,720 --> 00:04:47,719
Speaker 2: agree and think I should have postponed instead of canceling.

101
00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:49,960
Speaker 2: Even my maid of honors said I might be letting

102
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,920
Speaker 2: emotions take over and that it wasn't unforgivable.

103
00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:55,599
Speaker 3: Ah see, but like they were telling me, it'd be

104
00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:56,719
Speaker 3: like y'all didn't.

105
00:04:57,240 --> 00:04:59,919
Speaker 4: See it, Like y'all didn't y'all didn't smell it.

106
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:03,359
Speaker 2: She said exactly what happened, you know.

107
00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:05,360
Speaker 3: I mean, like, like, would.

108
00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:08,919
Speaker 2: You if your partner had this happen, would you just

109
00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:13,160
Speaker 2: say they got wasted and ruined the dress? Because I

110
00:05:13,240 --> 00:05:17,680
Speaker 2: probably wouldn't say everything that happened if I was still

111
00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:19,360
Speaker 2: like thinking about staying.

112
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:21,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think I think they've checked out. I think

113
00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:23,000
Speaker 3: it's one of those things where it's like I just

114
00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:26,560
Speaker 3: can't ever look at you again without seeing you pooping

115
00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:31,320
Speaker 3: yourself in my wedding dress. So I don't think it's

116
00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:31,840
Speaker 3: I don't know.

117
00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:34,320
Speaker 2: No, I'm saying, do you think that she told everyone else?

118
00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:36,960
Speaker 3: Well, I mean I think if you're planning on staying,

119
00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:40,320
Speaker 3: you probably wouldn't. If you're planning on leaving, you don't

120
00:05:40,320 --> 00:05:43,560
Speaker 3: really care. Yeah, because I think, yeah, I think it's over.

121
00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,480
Speaker 2: Well, she's only said that she canceled the wedding. We

122
00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:47,400
Speaker 2: don't know if they're like breaking up, which they might be.

123
00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:49,960
Speaker 2: But I feel like if she's planning on breaking out

124
00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:52,760
Speaker 2: with them, probably told everyone. If she's not planning, she

125
00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:55,040
Speaker 2: might not have told everyone, And so that's why maybe

126
00:05:55,040 --> 00:05:58,040
Speaker 2: they're like, oh, it's forgivable. He just like got wasted.

127
00:05:58,160 --> 00:05:59,520
Speaker 3: Maybe the ball is rolling down.

128
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,040
Speaker 4: I don't know at this moment for all three of us,

129
00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:04,640
Speaker 4: where do we stand. Do we break up or we

130
00:06:04,720 --> 00:06:07,480
Speaker 4: just like like postpone the wedding and like have a

131
00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:08,360
Speaker 4: actual discussion.

132
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:12,520
Speaker 2: I would postpone the wedding. I wouldn't break up until

133
00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:16,760
Speaker 2: I had an actual conversation because we don't know why

134
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:17,320
Speaker 2: this happened.

135
00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:19,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, what if he was like, oh no, honey, Like

136
00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:20,800
Speaker 4: I don't like you tell him, like because he doesn't know.

137
00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:22,560
Speaker 4: He's like he legitimately doesn't know.

138
00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:25,040
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't want to jump to the worst conclusion,

139
00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:27,120
Speaker 2: but there are a lot of reasons why a person,

140
00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:33,640
Speaker 2: you know, like there's a he might have been given

141
00:06:33,720 --> 00:06:36,120
Speaker 2: something you know that he didn't know about. Like that's

142
00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:38,440
Speaker 2: the worst possible thing. But like there are so many

143
00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:41,479
Speaker 2: different reasons why it could have been that he got

144
00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:45,120
Speaker 2: super wasted and didn't realize. You know, there are a

145
00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:47,839
Speaker 2: lot of different reasons, some that we are totally within

146
00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:49,760
Speaker 2: his control, some that are not. And I would want

147
00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:53,120
Speaker 2: to have a conversation before I made any like huge decisions.

148
00:06:53,560 --> 00:06:55,760
Speaker 3: I think you can not get married. I think if

149
00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:58,559
Speaker 3: it's me, I'm like, all right, I'm no longer ready

150
00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:00,840
Speaker 3: to get married. Deep Oh yes, yeah, I don't know.

151
00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:03,839
Speaker 3: I didn't know you were capable of such things.

152
00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,560
Speaker 2: But I feel like something broke that night. I didn't

153
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:11,480
Speaker 2: just feel disgusted, I felt disrespected. The dress wasn't just expensive,

154
00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:15,840
Speaker 2: it was important to me. It symbolized something. I cannot

155
00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:18,880
Speaker 2: unsee what happened. I can't laugh about it or move

156
00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:21,760
Speaker 2: on like it's just one bad night. I don't know

157
00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:23,760
Speaker 2: how to look at him the same way. Am I

158
00:07:23,840 --> 00:07:27,560
Speaker 2: overreacting for calling off the wedding? Relevant comments? Does Nick

159
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:31,120
Speaker 2: have problems with booze or substances? Opie says he's never

160
00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,280
Speaker 2: had problems with booze before, or not that I know of.

161
00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:35,800
Speaker 2: At least. Do you think it's a sign of something worse?

162
00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:39,360
Speaker 2: Commoner Wan says, is this something that happens often. Does

163
00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:42,360
Speaker 2: he often get blackout wasted? If yes, consider this a

164
00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:45,920
Speaker 2: bullet dodged. Either way, it's a little concerning. He got

165
00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:49,080
Speaker 2: blackout wasted the day before your wedding. I think you

166
00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:51,520
Speaker 2: need to have a conversation to figure out whether this

167
00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:54,520
Speaker 2: is a relationship worth saving. Opi says, No, this is

168
00:07:54,560 --> 00:07:56,720
Speaker 2: the first time he's ever gotten this wasted in the

169
00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:59,200
Speaker 2: time I've known him, which is why I think I

170
00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:02,640
Speaker 2: might be over reacting. Omar One says, is it possible

171
00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:04,400
Speaker 2: that someone puts something in his drink? Which is what

172
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:06,720
Speaker 2: I was thinking from your description? This is not in

173
00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:10,600
Speaker 2: character for your fiance. Opie says, I hadn't thought of that.

174
00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:13,880
Speaker 2: Maybe could it really have caused all of that? Also,

175
00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:15,760
Speaker 2: he was out with his friends, not like he was

176
00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:20,160
Speaker 2: with strangers. Yeah, but you know, there are many circumstances

177
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,720
Speaker 2: that you know many, Yeah, it's it can happen.

178
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:25,080
Speaker 3: Look, I don't even think it has anything to do

179
00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:28,040
Speaker 3: with the circumstances the context. I think it's the same thing.

180
00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:31,760
Speaker 3: It's the same kind of situation of like, if someone

181
00:08:31,840 --> 00:08:33,679
Speaker 3: like cheats on you and you get back together, you're

182
00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:36,439
Speaker 3: still always gonna you know, you might have a situation

183
00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:38,240
Speaker 3: where it's like when I see you, I just see

184
00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:40,640
Speaker 3: you like with that other guy. And now it's like,

185
00:08:40,679 --> 00:08:42,600
Speaker 3: regardless of if you meant to or if you were

186
00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:45,880
Speaker 3: blacked out or if whatever, when I see you, I

187
00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:49,360
Speaker 3: see that version of you that did that in the

188
00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:52,640
Speaker 3: wedding dress right before we got married, and I can't

189
00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:57,040
Speaker 3: stop seeing it. So I don't like if that's the case. Yeah,

190
00:08:57,080 --> 00:08:59,000
Speaker 3: I don't know where you go from there. A spot

191
00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:03,200
Speaker 3: of therapy maybe, yeah, to forget it. Come on, some diapers.

192
00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:07,400
Speaker 2: Somn or two says people are still themselves when they

193
00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:08,320
Speaker 2: are blackout wasted.

194
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:11,320
Speaker 3: That's not true. That's not that is that is that

195
00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:13,040
Speaker 3: is the most least.

196
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:16,960
Speaker 2: That's just a weird comment to make, to be like,

197
00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:20,520
Speaker 2: people are themselves when they're blackout wasted. Like I'm this

198
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:25,480
Speaker 2: man would not, you know, not cognizant, like relieve himself

199
00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:26,840
Speaker 2: if he were sober.

200
00:09:26,960 --> 00:09:29,079
Speaker 3: This man's been wanting to poop in a wedding dress

201
00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:29,960
Speaker 3: his whole life.

202
00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:32,000
Speaker 2: He's always wanted to, Like, come on, that's a.

203
00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:35,480
Speaker 4: That's an every wedding dress he sees when he is wasted,

204
00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:36,840
Speaker 4: he's like, that's my next start.

205
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:39,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's an excuse that's like a thing that you

206
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:41,520
Speaker 2: say when somebody cheets on their partner.

207
00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:44,480
Speaker 3: That's my toilet paper. I see the cut too of

208
00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:47,120
Speaker 3: this guy. He's standing in front in front of the

209
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:50,559
Speaker 3: window of a bridle shop, just like looking longingly into it,

210
00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,120
Speaker 3: and then in sides like what are you thinking about, honey?

211
00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:56,600
Speaker 3: He goes, Oh, nothing, you wouldn't understand.

212
00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:57,959
Speaker 4: I got to go to the bathroom now.

213
00:09:58,040 --> 00:10:00,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, I seeing my husband fend off flirt women when

214
00:10:00,679 --> 00:10:03,160
Speaker 2: he was so wasted. He was still himself when he

215
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:05,280
Speaker 2: ignored you. He was still himself when he wore your

216
00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:08,240
Speaker 2: wedding dress, something that is obviously special and off limits.

217
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:10,840
Speaker 2: I disagree with this. Yeah, the dress is the most

218
00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:13,120
Speaker 2: important item of the most important day of your life,

219
00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:16,000
Speaker 2: and he pooped on it. No one forced him to

220
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:19,440
Speaker 2: get that wasted, and he was still himself when wasted. Ope,

221
00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:21,560
Speaker 2: he says, I don't know. I'm worried some of his

222
00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:25,280
Speaker 2: friends might have been pressuring him to drink. Commander three says,

223
00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:28,040
Speaker 2: it's the series of bad decisions that gets me here,

224
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,520
Speaker 2: first getting pissed or in this case, crap wasted the

225
00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:34,320
Speaker 2: night before your wedding. Thirty year olds can't bounce back

226
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,640
Speaker 2: like a twenty one year old can being hung over

227
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,240
Speaker 2: at your own wedding is a bad look. Go him

228
00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:41,400
Speaker 2: at the bachelor party, sure, but maybe keep it to

229
00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:45,760
Speaker 2: a couple drink smacks the night before. Second, it's deciding

230
00:10:46,160 --> 00:10:49,240
Speaker 2: to wastedly put on your fiance's dress. I'll be honest,

231
00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:52,040
Speaker 2: I'd be terrified to go anywhere near it until after

232
00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:54,200
Speaker 2: the wedding. I wouldn't want to be the cause of

233
00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:57,280
Speaker 2: any sort of issue with it, especially with T minus

234
00:10:57,320 --> 00:10:59,959
Speaker 2: twenty four hours until the wedding. Third, it's the decision,

235
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:02,680
Speaker 2: did you keep going even though you're struggling and ignoring

236
00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:05,840
Speaker 2: or pleas to stop? Are to excuse so many bad

237
00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:08,640
Speaker 2: decisions in such a short time.

238
00:11:08,880 --> 00:11:11,720
Speaker 3: This is just somebody writing a comment like fundamentally not

239
00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:16,200
Speaker 3: understanding what blacking out is. Yeah, I think that what

240
00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:18,160
Speaker 3: you still to drink that much? Yeah?

241
00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:21,800
Speaker 2: I was about to say, you can criticize him deciding

242
00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:25,280
Speaker 2: to drink that much and therefore you know, doing all

243
00:11:25,360 --> 00:11:27,720
Speaker 2: of this. But I feel like to say, like, I

244
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:30,400
Speaker 2: can't believe he ignored, You can't believe he put like

245
00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:32,520
Speaker 2: this man is blackout like this is.

246
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:35,760
Speaker 3: Has just never been around someone drunk like their whole

247
00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:36,839
Speaker 3: life really this is.

248
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:39,200
Speaker 4: What I'm seeing, this one'm picturing. He walks into the room.

249
00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:41,320
Speaker 4: He's like, I'm gonna put on the dress. It's gonna

250
00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:43,880
Speaker 4: be really funny. And he's like, I'm gonna fart at it.

251
00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:47,560
Speaker 4: It's gonna be really funny. No, I dude, the dude.

252
00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:50,000
Speaker 3: The thing that got me was the fact that he's like,

253
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,360
Speaker 3: I want to see what it's like to be a bride.

254
00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:54,720
Speaker 3: I want to feel what it's like to be a bride.

255
00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:56,920
Speaker 3: It's like, yeah, do we have some of my unresults?

256
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:59,440
Speaker 3: What's going on there? There's something rare to that, But

257
00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:00,040
Speaker 3: I think.

258
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:02,920
Speaker 4: Or he's just trying to be funny, and then he

259
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:05,040
Speaker 4: he just totally una reversed himself.

260
00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:07,880
Speaker 2: But uh update, Hi again. First off, thank you to

261
00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:11,240
Speaker 2: everyone who responded. I didn't expect the level of tension

262
00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:14,040
Speaker 2: my post got, and honestly, reading the replies made me

263
00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:16,839
Speaker 2: feel less alone. Some people told me I was right

264
00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:19,120
Speaker 2: to call it off. Others said it was a terrible

265
00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:22,440
Speaker 2: mistake but not unforgivable. Both sides helped me see the

266
00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:27,800
Speaker 2: situation more clearly. I spoke to Nick this morning, not

267
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:31,040
Speaker 2: for closure, not for a big emotional talk, just to

268
00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:34,000
Speaker 2: return some things and check in about logistics since everything's

269
00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:37,280
Speaker 2: been canceled, but we ended up sitting down and talking

270
00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:41,520
Speaker 2: for over an hour. He apologized again, sincerely. He didn't

271
00:12:41,559 --> 00:12:44,560
Speaker 2: try to defend himself or shift blame. He told me

272
00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:48,120
Speaker 2: he didn't remember everything clearly, but knows he came home wasted,

273
00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:51,280
Speaker 2: saw the dress and, in his words, thought it would

274
00:12:51,280 --> 00:12:53,960
Speaker 2: be funny or meaningful or something. He didn't mean to

275
00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:56,800
Speaker 2: ruin the dress. He didn't mean to humiliate me, but

276
00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:59,960
Speaker 2: he did, and he knows that. He said, he's a shame,

277
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,240
Speaker 2: aimed of what happened and how out of control he

278
00:13:02,320 --> 00:13:06,200
Speaker 2: let himself get. He also admitted this wasn't that the

279
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:09,280
Speaker 2: first time his drinking led to something bad, which is

280
00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:13,600
Speaker 2: probably why you haven't seen him drink. Really, he said

281
00:13:13,640 --> 00:13:15,319
Speaker 2: this was a wake up call and that he's going

282
00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:18,600
Speaker 2: to stop drinking entirely. I didn't even know he had

283
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:21,199
Speaker 2: a problem. The thing is, I still care about him.

284
00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:24,120
Speaker 2: We were supposed to get married. I didn't walk away

285
00:13:24,160 --> 00:13:27,920
Speaker 2: from someone I didn't love. But something inside me cracked

286
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,760
Speaker 2: that night and it hasn't yield. I don't know if

287
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:33,360
Speaker 2: it will. I know it sounds superficial to some people,

288
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,120
Speaker 2: but for me, it was a symbol of our future,

289
00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:39,280
Speaker 2: of the person I thought I was marrying, and watching

290
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:42,040
Speaker 2: him defile it in that state, whether on purpose or

291
00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:45,520
Speaker 2: by accident, change something. I've been trying to figure out

292
00:13:45,559 --> 00:13:47,600
Speaker 2: if that one night should be the end of four

293
00:13:47,679 --> 00:13:50,640
Speaker 2: years together. But it's not really just that one night,

294
00:13:50,760 --> 00:13:54,200
Speaker 2: is it. It's what it revealed about how he handles stress,

295
00:13:54,720 --> 00:13:57,800
Speaker 2: about how far he let himself go, about how I

296
00:13:57,840 --> 00:14:01,080
Speaker 2: felt standing in that room watching someone I loved become

297
00:14:01,160 --> 00:14:05,760
Speaker 2: almost unrecognizable. By the way, you should recognize that you

298
00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:08,439
Speaker 2: can listen to full episodes of stories just like this.

299
00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:11,800
Speaker 2: Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeart Radio and

300
00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:15,520
Speaker 2: search a Pokey story time. There is a little bit

301
00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:17,680
Speaker 2: left to this story. Do you have any final thought?

302
00:14:17,760 --> 00:14:20,400
Speaker 3: Dude, Sometimes like a moment happens and you just can't

303
00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:21,800
Speaker 3: unmoment the moment.

304
00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:24,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can recognize that you've made a terrible mistake,

305
00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:27,480
Speaker 2: and you can recognize that you have a problem with drinking,

306
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:30,600
Speaker 2: but you've already hurt the person that you love.

307
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:32,840
Speaker 3: Can't go back and undo that.

308
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:36,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's like a great you know, I am

309
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:40,760
Speaker 2: very proud of him for making or like at least

310
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:43,920
Speaker 2: you know, thinking about making this decision saying like I

311
00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:46,440
Speaker 2: never want to drink again. I want to like go

312
00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:48,760
Speaker 2: going forward. Don't want to do that again. Obviously we

313
00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:51,000
Speaker 2: don't know if he's gonna fall through, but hopefully I

314
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,160
Speaker 2: think that's a big decision.

315
00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:56,680
Speaker 3: I gotta say something like that. Yeah, should probably make

316
00:14:56,760 --> 00:14:59,880
Speaker 3: you stop. Yeah, right, I mean there are you can't

317
00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:02,200
Speaker 3: after that. That's a very serious issue.

318
00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:04,240
Speaker 2: Exactly. There are moments in your life where you hit

319
00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:08,200
Speaker 2: rock bottom like this and you realize, wow, I need

320
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:14,280
Speaker 2: to make a giant change. But unfortunately, sometimes when we

321
00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:16,800
Speaker 2: hit that rock bottom, you don't always get to like

322
00:15:17,280 --> 00:15:19,240
Speaker 2: sometimes you lose the people that you care about.

323
00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:22,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm not giving him full you know, like all right,

324
00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:24,920
Speaker 4: you're off the hook. But the one thing I appreciate

325
00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:27,520
Speaker 4: from him, he's taking full accountability. And he's not blaming

326
00:15:27,520 --> 00:15:30,480
Speaker 4: his friends, like he's like oh yeah, yeah, like he

327
00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:32,320
Speaker 4: didn't mention his friends. We don't know, but from what

328
00:15:32,400 --> 00:15:34,600
Speaker 4: his words seem legit, no, I think that.

329
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:37,200
Speaker 2: He's like I don't want to, you know, sit here

330
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:39,200
Speaker 2: and be like, ah, he sucks. He's the worst.

331
00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:40,280
Speaker 3: He's an a hole.

332
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,880
Speaker 2: Like this is a man who made a very bad mistake,

333
00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:46,520
Speaker 2: recognizes that wants to make a change in his life

334
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:49,280
Speaker 2: doesn't mean that ops to stay with him.

335
00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:52,720
Speaker 3: Sometimes you can't put Genie bag in the bottle exactly,

336
00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:54,400
Speaker 3: no matter how bad you want to, because you're just like,

337
00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:58,720
Speaker 3: I just see the worst thing I've ever seen in

338
00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:02,080
Speaker 3: my life time I think about you. That's what I

339
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:05,480
Speaker 3: see in my head, and I can't keep going if

340
00:16:05,520 --> 00:16:07,640
Speaker 3: I see that. Yeah, and it'd be clear. I don't know.

341
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:10,840
Speaker 3: I've seen some comments. I'm in no way like being like, well,

342
00:16:10,840 --> 00:16:13,080
Speaker 3: if you get blacked out because you don't know what

343
00:16:13,120 --> 00:16:16,280
Speaker 3: you're doing, it absolves you of all responsibility. In no

344
00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:20,160
Speaker 3: universe would I think that. But it's more like we

345
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:23,120
Speaker 3: have some comments where it almost sounded like someone didn't

346
00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:26,920
Speaker 3: understand that when you get to a point of blacked

347
00:16:26,920 --> 00:16:31,280
Speaker 3: out inebriation, like there are biomechanical processes in your brain

348
00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:36,040
Speaker 3: that turn off. Yeah, you no longer are at the helm.

349
00:16:36,280 --> 00:16:39,040
Speaker 3: You are not driving the car anymore. It's just going.

350
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:41,240
Speaker 2: But there's a little bit left to this story. I

351
00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:44,840
Speaker 2: haven't made a final decision yet. Technically the wedding is

352
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:48,040
Speaker 2: still canceled, but the relationship isn't officially over. We're on

353
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:50,840
Speaker 2: kind of an emotional pause. That's fair. I guess he

354
00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:53,720
Speaker 2: says he wants to make things right, and maybe he will.

355
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:56,520
Speaker 2: Maybe with time, I'll want to try again. But right

356
00:16:56,560 --> 00:16:59,280
Speaker 2: now I still feel like I'm grieving something that ended,

357
00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:01,000
Speaker 2: and I don't know I know if I'm ready to

358
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:04,159
Speaker 2: build it back from scratch. So I guess I'm now

359
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:07,000
Speaker 2: asking am I overreacting if I walk away from this

360
00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:10,840
Speaker 2: completely top comment Commoner says, not at all overreacting. This

361
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:12,480
Speaker 2: is not about the dress, but what it meant to

362
00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:15,520
Speaker 2: feel powerless as he did something stupid, thoughtless, and immature

363
00:17:15,560 --> 00:17:18,640
Speaker 2: after drinking himself into a stupor and the glimpse into

364
00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:21,160
Speaker 2: your future, you got that you couldn't gaslight yourself into

365
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:26,440
Speaker 2: ignoring because it ruins something so symbolic and expensive. Believe

366
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:29,560
Speaker 2: the symbolism. This is a red flag, not that he's

367
00:17:29,560 --> 00:17:32,000
Speaker 2: a bad person, but that this partnership might come with

368
00:17:32,119 --> 00:17:36,439
Speaker 2: significant difficulty long term as he continues to cope with

369
00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:40,000
Speaker 2: life stresses in immature ways that leave you always having

370
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:42,520
Speaker 2: to be the adult in house. I've been in relationships

371
00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:46,160
Speaker 2: where I've made excuses for every red flag I've seen

372
00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:49,919
Speaker 2: loved ones indoor relationships with addicts, hoping they'll change if

373
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:52,560
Speaker 2: they just pour n off Lovin'. None of them realized

374
00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:55,159
Speaker 2: there was a problem at first either, But it seems

375
00:17:55,160 --> 00:17:58,439
Speaker 2: like your boyfriend is admitting there is something to that theory.

376
00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:01,600
Speaker 2: None of the aforementioned reallylationships had a happy ending, and

377
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:04,399
Speaker 2: most have been extremely, extremely bad in a way that

378
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:08,840
Speaker 2: seemed uncharacteristic for the partner when he finally hit rock bottom.

379
00:18:09,240 --> 00:18:11,840
Speaker 2: You may genuinely want to change, and you may be

380
00:18:11,920 --> 00:18:14,960
Speaker 2: hopeful that could fix some things, but long term, a

381
00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,959
Speaker 2: lot of people have trouble quitting substances when nothing of

382
00:18:18,119 --> 00:18:21,280
Speaker 2: significance has changed for them and they're still in a

383
00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:24,200
Speaker 2: situation where they can see opportunities to drink or use

384
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:27,760
Speaker 2: and know they can without losing much comfort and stability.

385
00:18:27,760 --> 00:18:31,560
Speaker 2: Are your enemies with when fighting addiction, because they enable

386
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:35,440
Speaker 2: a reticence to change. I want to add staying in

387
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:37,280
Speaker 2: a relationship where you feel like you have to be

388
00:18:37,359 --> 00:18:40,040
Speaker 2: the adult and take steps to manage the other person's

389
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:44,240
Speaker 2: behavior gets extremely taxing and builds a lot of resentment

390
00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:47,040
Speaker 2: very quickly. Think of this as something that tore off

391
00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:50,080
Speaker 2: your rose colored glasses and made you look at an

392
00:18:50,160 --> 00:18:52,960
Speaker 2: ugliness you didn't want to see. Eld your eyes open

393
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:56,600
Speaker 2: to a version of your future you didn't anticipate. If

394
00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:59,360
Speaker 2: you are absolutely one hundred percent sure this is one

395
00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:02,520
Speaker 2: time thing, it might be repairable. But I feel like

396
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:04,880
Speaker 2: if you're willing to lose all the money an effort

397
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,680
Speaker 2: sunk into planning a wedding and go through the ordeal

398
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:11,760
Speaker 2: of canceling, that seems like it implies a larger issue underneath.

399
00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:15,159
Speaker 2: Whether it's about the way he handles stress, is propensity

400
00:19:15,200 --> 00:19:18,200
Speaker 2: to hurt you with little, careless things, or how often

401
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,159
Speaker 2: you envision yourself cleaning up his messes or managing his

402
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:24,960
Speaker 2: behavior in your lives together. The cliche is true. When

403
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:28,040
Speaker 2: someone shows you who they are, believe them. I made

404
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:31,840
Speaker 2: excuses for everything my ex did that made my skin crawl,

405
00:19:32,359 --> 00:19:35,240
Speaker 2: and when we finally broke up, I was worried he

406
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:39,440
Speaker 2: might actually hurt me for months, Even now a few

407
00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:41,920
Speaker 2: years later, I don't think that was crazy. I think

408
00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:45,080
Speaker 2: he was more than capable of it, resented me, and

409
00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:48,320
Speaker 2: I believe tried to break into my apartments. Obviously a

410
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:51,199
Speaker 2: different situation, but for years other people in our lives

411
00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:53,119
Speaker 2: had tried to point out red flags to me, and

412
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,320
Speaker 2: he did things that definitely gave me a lot of pause,

413
00:19:55,880 --> 00:19:58,080
Speaker 2: but I always opted to look for the best in him.

414
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:01,000
Speaker 2: In hindsight, I embellished, in exact, rated some goodness that

415
00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:04,000
Speaker 2: wasn't really there. I lost five years of my life

416
00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:06,880
Speaker 2: to that relationship, and figuring out where to go from

417
00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:09,760
Speaker 2: here has been incredibly difficult. I wish I had left

418
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:11,800
Speaker 2: the first time. Something he said or did gave me

419
00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:14,720
Speaker 2: the sinking feeling of this is my future and I

420
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:18,360
Speaker 2: don't like it. Rather than convincing myself, I was overreacting

421
00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:23,920
Speaker 2: and being unfair. Please learn from my mistakes. And that

422
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:27,880
Speaker 2: is the end of that story. And that, to be clear,

423
00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:32,159
Speaker 2: was a commentary, not appeasing all that. I think that Dakota,

424
00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:33,760
Speaker 2: you have a really good point of you know, this

425
00:20:33,880 --> 00:20:35,480
Speaker 2: might be the only thing that she ever thinks about

426
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:39,040
Speaker 2: which is valid. And if that is the case, and

427
00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:42,359
Speaker 2: you really can't see yourself ever forgetting or ever getting

428
00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:44,520
Speaker 2: over it, then you know, maybe this relationship is not

429
00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:46,200
Speaker 2: going to work out in long term and that's okay,

430
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:49,399
Speaker 2: but maybe there is a chance, maybe you can have

431
00:20:49,440 --> 00:20:52,760
Speaker 2: that conversation. Maybe you know, as he begins this journey

432
00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:56,040
Speaker 2: of sobriety, you're like, you know what I see that

433
00:20:56,119 --> 00:20:58,480
Speaker 2: he's willing to change I'm willing to give a chance.

434
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,359
Speaker 2: That's also okay. You know the many different paths for you.

435
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:04,240
Speaker 3: This could have been the same story with just a

436
00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:06,800
Speaker 3: different you know, it could have been Yeah. He came

437
00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 3: home really drunk, and then he started telling me about

438
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,600
Speaker 3: how the earth is hollow and full of lizard people,

439
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:15,359
Speaker 3: and how we're gonna fight back against the lizards and

440
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:17,520
Speaker 3: we're gonna make our family nice and we're gonna have

441
00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:20,679
Speaker 3: a strong family together. And then after he said that,

442
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:24,600
Speaker 3: I could never be like, honey, are you sure you

443
00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:26,639
Speaker 3: don't think the earth is hollow and full of lizards?

444
00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,160
Speaker 3: He's like, no, no, no, I swear I don't. It's like, yeah,

445
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,560
Speaker 3: but you really really meant it that one time you

446
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:33,960
Speaker 3: said it to me. And now I can't stop seeing

447
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:37,080
Speaker 3: you as a guy who thinks the lizards are gonna

448
00:21:37,080 --> 00:21:39,480
Speaker 3: invade from the center of the earth. So I don't

449
00:21:39,520 --> 00:21:41,400
Speaker 3: think this is working anymore.

450
00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:43,800
Speaker 2: And we do have another story, folks.

451
00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:45,959
Speaker 1: Sam here og host. We're gonna get back to these stories.

452
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:47,960
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes baths from our sponsors.

453
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:52,240
Speaker 3: First, my girlfriend discovered I'm queer, and she did not

454
00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:55,600
Speaker 3: take it. Well, it's bride month. She has to it's

455
00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:58,800
Speaker 3: illegal for you to not accept that this is ridiculous,

456
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:01,200
Speaker 3: but she has ex. I sickly asked me to ask

457
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:04,760
Speaker 3: the internet because she's convinced she's in the right. So

458
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:07,880
Speaker 3: my girlfriend, twenty four female and I twenty one male,

459
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:11,160
Speaker 3: were talking about school and our childhood's a few days ago.

460
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,720
Speaker 3: I originally lived in England, but she's always been a

461
00:22:14,760 --> 00:22:18,119
Speaker 3: Scotland girl, so we were comparing. I was showing her

462
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:20,440
Speaker 3: pictures of me and my mates from when we were

463
00:22:20,680 --> 00:22:23,800
Speaker 3: sixteen or seventeen, and she noticed that me and one

464
00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:25,800
Speaker 3: of my friends seemed a little close in some of

465
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,439
Speaker 3: the pictures, even noticed that I was sitting in his

466
00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:30,560
Speaker 3: lap in one of them. By the way, this comes

467
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:35,280
Speaker 3: from user noodle Lootle scruble eh. I like that, and

468
00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:37,080
Speaker 3: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

469
00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:39,240
Speaker 3: the r slash sh okay story time. So abread it.

470
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:42,720
Speaker 3: So she asked me, and I just flat out told

471
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,119
Speaker 3: her that's my ex because it didn't seem like a

472
00:22:45,160 --> 00:22:47,360
Speaker 3: big deal to me, and it still doesn't. She got

473
00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:50,119
Speaker 3: a bit annoyed and then asked me why I hadn't

474
00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:53,680
Speaker 3: told her about this before. I assume the this she

475
00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:56,280
Speaker 3: was talking about was my ex, and I said that

476
00:22:56,359 --> 00:22:58,160
Speaker 3: I hadn't really thought about him in a while because

477
00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:01,399
Speaker 3: we were teenagers and I've moved away since. Then she

478
00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:04,840
Speaker 3: got more annoyed and said, not that, I mean that

479
00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:08,480
Speaker 3: you like guys. I got kind of confused then, because

480
00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:11,000
Speaker 3: it's not something I hid from her. She is right.

481
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:14,560
Speaker 3: I've never explicitly told her that I'm by, but I

482
00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:18,359
Speaker 3: have pins of the flag on several bags. We thirst

483
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:21,480
Speaker 3: over male celebrities together. I mean, the night we met,

484
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:24,040
Speaker 3: I was flirting with her male friend at a pub,

485
00:23:24,520 --> 00:23:28,160
Speaker 3: obviously lighthearted and before we were dating, so.

486
00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:31,000
Speaker 2: There were pretty clear signs.

487
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:34,520
Speaker 3: They were big old neon signs flashing general.

488
00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:37,919
Speaker 2: Obviously, if someone has a pride pin, it doesn't necessarily

489
00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:40,360
Speaker 2: it could mean there at all. But if someone has

490
00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:44,480
Speaker 2: a very specific pride pin, maybe we could do a

491
00:23:44,600 --> 00:23:47,800
Speaker 2: little bit of you know, cognitive thinking.

492
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:50,280
Speaker 3: My boyfriend is a big fan of the color spectrum.

493
00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:53,880
Speaker 3: This is the rainbow, Oh, just imagining someone's like, yeah,

494
00:23:53,920 --> 00:23:55,200
Speaker 3: I don't know, he just has a bunch of life.

495
00:23:56,640 --> 00:24:00,240
Speaker 3: He said, that's so like, Sorry, I thought I thought

496
00:24:00,280 --> 00:24:02,520
Speaker 3: we were also started to know that the visible spectrum

497
00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:03,440
Speaker 3: is you know.

498
00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:08,080
Speaker 2: Just the way that you said that didn't sound like anyway, Okay.

499
00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:10,880
Speaker 3: So anyway, I apologize for not telling her and asked

500
00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:14,480
Speaker 3: what the big deal was. She's not a closet officer

501
00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:17,159
Speaker 3: by any means, and I didn't understand why she was

502
00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:19,800
Speaker 3: getting so angry. Buddy, I think she might be. I

503
00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:23,680
Speaker 3: think you're about to find out that she actually doesn't

504
00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:24,080
Speaker 3: like that.

505
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:27,560
Speaker 2: I think there is this thing where like, very often

506
00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:29,880
Speaker 2: when you have straight women who are dating a bye

507
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:33,479
Speaker 2: man or just straight women general who are like, I

508
00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:36,680
Speaker 2: wouldn't date a bye man because he's been with men,

509
00:24:36,960 --> 00:24:40,920
Speaker 2: and like automatically see them as gay, as like just gay.

510
00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:43,359
Speaker 2: They're like, oh, they're not actually interested in women and

511
00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:47,000
Speaker 2: have that which is you are being a closet officer

512
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:51,040
Speaker 2: if you think that they're not interested in women because

513
00:24:51,080 --> 00:24:53,560
Speaker 2: they've been interested in men, and like that's a like

514
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:57,800
Speaker 2: I have a friend whose ex girlfriend he was telling me,

515
00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:01,159
Speaker 2: He's like yeah, Like she was talking her friends and

516
00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:03,120
Speaker 2: was and they were saying that they would never date

517
00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:07,040
Speaker 2: a buy man, right why, Like I understand.

518
00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:09,119
Speaker 3: I would never date a bye man because they don't exist.

519
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:12,360
Speaker 2: It's just gay. That's kind of the That is.

520
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:15,120
Speaker 3: What a lot of people think. Those are the kind

521
00:25:15,119 --> 00:25:17,280
Speaker 3: of people who see neapolitan ice cream and they just

522
00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:21,480
Speaker 3: break down into did you start crying and weeping?

523
00:25:21,840 --> 00:25:24,560
Speaker 2: No, it's the type of people that are like buy

524
00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:28,159
Speaker 2: men are actually gay and buy women are straight because

525
00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:29,600
Speaker 2: everyone has to like men.

526
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:33,400
Speaker 3: Well, my take on that is being bye is gay

527
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 3: and straight. It's both.

528
00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:39,680
Speaker 2: Tada, you've done it, but it's at least a little gay. Yeah,

529
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:41,840
Speaker 2: it's gay, but they just think they're full gay.

530
00:25:41,880 --> 00:25:42,840
Speaker 3: It's also a little straight.

531
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:45,080
Speaker 2: It's also that's that's the point.

532
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:46,720
Speaker 4: Of the name. That's why we call it bye.

533
00:25:46,720 --> 00:25:49,120
Speaker 2: And that's why it's got its own names, the whole deal.

534
00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:53,520
Speaker 3: I told her as such, and she stared at me blankly, appalled,

535
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:57,000
Speaker 3: as if I should know. She said she didn't like

536
00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,560
Speaker 3: being lied to, which again I didn't lie. She never

537
00:25:59,640 --> 00:26:01,400
Speaker 3: asked and it never came up.

538
00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:03,560
Speaker 2: She also assumed that you were straight.

539
00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:07,000
Speaker 3: Right, Okay. I get why she was upset at that

540
00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:10,399
Speaker 3: it could be seen as hurtful and she's sensitive. We

541
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:14,640
Speaker 3: both are, so I understood and apologized. She then said

542
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:17,120
Speaker 3: she couldn't believe I had ever been with a guy

543
00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:18,359
Speaker 3: and that it was weird.

544
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:19,040
Speaker 2: Yikes.

545
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:21,320
Speaker 3: I asked her why it was weird. I said that

546
00:26:21,359 --> 00:26:23,479
Speaker 3: I've seen pictures with her and her exes and that

547
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:25,960
Speaker 3: I was okay with it. And she said the X

548
00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:28,840
Speaker 3: thing didn't bother her. It's that my ex was a guy.

549
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:32,360
Speaker 2: Yes, because she's across the officer.

550
00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:34,000
Speaker 3: This baffles me more.

551
00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:40,160
Speaker 2: She's just undercover, because again she's not a closet officer. Wow,

552
00:26:40,560 --> 00:26:42,480
Speaker 2: I think we've I think we've.

553
00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:45,760
Speaker 3: Reached the problem she is if it walks like a

554
00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:46,600
Speaker 3: duck she is.

555
00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:50,959
Speaker 2: Just because she's not saying slurs doesn't mean that you

556
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:54,760
Speaker 2: know she is a being prejudiced.

557
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:57,920
Speaker 4: I know exactly what you were thinking. Keep reading.

558
00:26:58,160 --> 00:27:01,040
Speaker 3: This baffles me more because again, and she's not a

559
00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:04,200
Speaker 3: closet officer. At least I didn't think she.

560
00:27:04,359 --> 00:27:05,000
Speaker 2: Was there it is.

561
00:27:05,280 --> 00:27:07,920
Speaker 3: She asked if I ever thought I was just gay

562
00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:10,600
Speaker 3: and not by yep, there it is, she said.

563
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:10,920
Speaker 2: No.

564
00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:14,639
Speaker 3: I said I liked girls before I ever knew I

565
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:18,159
Speaker 3: liked guys. She said to me, she didn't really believe

566
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:21,920
Speaker 3: in Bye Tea said that it wasn't a good look

567
00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:25,040
Speaker 3: for the community, or something along those lines.

568
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:26,239
Speaker 2: What is that?

569
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:31,240
Speaker 3: What imagine that line used in literally any other content?

570
00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:33,480
Speaker 2: Not a good luck, it's not a good luck?

571
00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:36,360
Speaker 3: I imagine imagine she dropped that line about an inter

572
00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 3: racial couple. She would be literally ran out of town.

573
00:27:39,520 --> 00:27:42,720
Speaker 3: And she's just like, eh, it's just opinion one or

574
00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:44,960
Speaker 3: the other. I don't think it's a good look for

575
00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:51,120
Speaker 3: the community. You're insane, I said, Well, I am one,

576
00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:55,919
Speaker 3: so that's the proof, right. The argument basically went around

577
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:57,920
Speaker 3: in circles at that point until we went to bed.

578
00:27:58,560 --> 00:28:02,760
Speaker 3: We haven't really spokenperly since. Whenever I try, she interrupts

579
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:05,119
Speaker 3: me and tells me that she can't believe I was

580
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:08,600
Speaker 3: gay before her and lied about it, which again, I'm

581
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:12,159
Speaker 3: not gay. I'm by I like girls. I like her.

582
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:14,960
Speaker 3: It's so frustrating to me because she won't even hear

583
00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,080
Speaker 3: me out and just tells me she feels betrayed that

584
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,720
Speaker 3: I lied to her and she thinks I'm just dating

585
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:22,320
Speaker 3: her because I don't want to fully commit to being gay.

586
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:23,400
Speaker 2: Yikes.

587
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,480
Speaker 3: So like we should be breaking up, Yeah, we should

588
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:27,160
Speaker 3: be breaking up.

589
00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:31,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is an insane point of view. That's crazy.

590
00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:34,040
Speaker 2: You've been with this person and to think. And also

591
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:36,919
Speaker 2: I don't even like the the oh, you lied to

592
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:39,160
Speaker 2: me thing, which oh P already apologizes for. But I

593
00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:43,120
Speaker 2: don't even like that because one she assumed is, you know,

594
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:44,240
Speaker 2: his sexuality.

595
00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:45,120
Speaker 3: Uh.

596
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 2: And also just given the way that he brought up, like, oh, yeah,

597
00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:52,160
Speaker 2: that's my ex. Clearly is open about it. Yeah, clearly

598
00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:56,040
Speaker 2: wasn't intentionally hiding anything. So like, what are you talking about?

599
00:28:56,400 --> 00:29:01,920
Speaker 3: Just the indefensible position. Yeah, Opie's soon to be I hope, actually,

600
00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 3: I hope. So she hasn't broken up with me as

601
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:06,840
Speaker 3: of yet, but I feel like she's going to if

602
00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:09,320
Speaker 3: we keep arguing like this and she won't let me

603
00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 3: get a word in. Say, am I the a hole brother?

604
00:29:11,720 --> 00:29:13,560
Speaker 3: I think you need to be the one breaking up?

605
00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:15,360
Speaker 2: Yeah?

606
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:19,120
Speaker 3: What mm mmm mm hmmm. It's just I feel like,

607
00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:21,720
Speaker 3: really the core of this it comes from like maybe

608
00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:24,520
Speaker 3: not even like homophobia or anything, just like like a

609
00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:27,280
Speaker 3: place where it's like, well, it's like now I have

610
00:29:27,320 --> 00:29:31,480
Speaker 3: to feel insecure about every other person who's not me. Well,

611
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:34,040
Speaker 3: but that's not I have to worry about every other

612
00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:38,040
Speaker 3: person on the planet potentially being able to take my man.

613
00:29:38,280 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 2: But that's biphobia, Cause it's like it's the it's the

614
00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:44,200
Speaker 2: idea that oh, because in a relationship, let's say you're

615
00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 2: with we're a straight person in a relationship with a

616
00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:51,360
Speaker 2: straight woman, straight man, you if you are thinking that

617
00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:54,360
Speaker 2: everyone's going to steal your partner, and your partner's going

618
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:56,520
Speaker 2: to cheat on everyone. You know, all of those men

619
00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:59,920
Speaker 2: or women, you know, then you're not in a healthy

620
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:00,880
Speaker 2: relationship the same.

621
00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 3: That's what I'm trying to say. I'm saying I think

622
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:07,520
Speaker 3: this just comes from a place of like probably already insecure.

623
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:10,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, but now it's like, oh my god, I'm saying

624
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:11,280
Speaker 2: it doesn't exist.

625
00:30:11,600 --> 00:30:13,240
Speaker 3: Well, of course you're just gay.

626
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:17,560
Speaker 2: Like those those are all rooted and heavy amounts of biphobia,

627
00:30:17,720 --> 00:30:20,640
Speaker 2: or should I say, which also comes from insecurity, because

628
00:30:20,680 --> 00:30:25,840
Speaker 2: I think there's this like insecurity from well, i'll talk

629
00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:28,080
Speaker 2: about straight women because it's in that's what we're discussing

630
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:31,040
Speaker 2: in the story. But there's this insecurity from like certain

631
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:35,760
Speaker 2: straight women who think that they'll lose their boyfriends to

632
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:38,720
Speaker 2: a gay man because they're like, oh, he's not actually

633
00:30:38,720 --> 00:30:42,480
Speaker 2: into me, Like he's not by so he's he must

634
00:30:42,560 --> 00:30:43,360
Speaker 2: be only into man.

635
00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:43,560
Speaker 4: Like.

636
00:30:43,600 --> 00:30:47,320
Speaker 2: There's that thinking which comes from biphobia.

637
00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:50,240
Speaker 3: There's an edit. Nothing has happened with the situation because

638
00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:52,080
Speaker 3: it's the middle of the night and I posted this

639
00:30:52,120 --> 00:30:54,360
Speaker 3: a few hours ago, but this seems to have blown

640
00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:56,560
Speaker 3: up a little bit. So I'm going to clarify and

641
00:30:56,640 --> 00:30:59,120
Speaker 3: clear things up. First of all, those people who think

642
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:02,640
Speaker 3: I'm going to give my girlfriend in STD or convinced

643
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:06,160
Speaker 3: I have AIDS or whatever, f off. Genuinely, I'm sorry.

644
00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:08,360
Speaker 3: I don't like being mean to people, even over the internet,

645
00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:10,760
Speaker 3: but far too many of you seem to have this thought.

646
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,840
Speaker 3: First of all, my girlfriend insisted that we both get

647
00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:16,320
Speaker 3: tested before we did anything, because she got one from

648
00:31:16,360 --> 00:31:18,840
Speaker 3: a previous partner and doesn't want that to happen again.

649
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:22,440
Speaker 3: Sell all of you convinced that I slept around with

650
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:25,680
Speaker 3: men and contracted some kind of virus. I have never

651
00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:29,120
Speaker 3: had traditional spicy sleep with a guy. The only guy

652
00:31:29,120 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 3: I've ever been with was first relationship with said ax

653
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:35,000
Speaker 3: mentioned in the post, and my only other relationship has

654
00:31:35,040 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 3: been with a woman who took my v card, which

655
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:42,640
Speaker 3: the relationship only lasted a month. Anyway, So stop now

656
00:31:43,080 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 3: to clarify some important things. Yes, I know I should

657
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:48,360
Speaker 3: have mentioned I was by her once we started dating,

658
00:31:48,760 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 3: but truthfully, it didn't even occur to me. Look, I

659
00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:54,560
Speaker 3: don't know, like it's it's not like a penicillin allergy. Like,

660
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 3: it's not like you have to like be by the hi.

661
00:31:56,960 --> 00:32:01,280
Speaker 3: It's nice to meet you, I'm like, I'm Danny, I'm yeah.

662
00:32:01,360 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 2: I think there's this expectation that queer people have to

663
00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:07,320
Speaker 2: and also not on both Like I think that queer

664
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:11,200
Speaker 2: people expect themselves to have to come out constantly. It's

665
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:12,960
Speaker 2: like this thing that you never have to stop you

666
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:15,720
Speaker 2: you can never stop doing over the course of your life.

667
00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:19,640
Speaker 2: But that doesn't mean that you have to do that

668
00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:24,720
Speaker 2: no one. You don't owe anyone like an announcement. You

669
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:28,600
Speaker 2: clearly aren't hiding it, you know. If she assumed that

670
00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:32,960
Speaker 2: you were straight, that's kind of her thing that she

671
00:32:33,080 --> 00:32:35,880
Speaker 2: needs to reckon with. Like, you literally were not trying

672
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:39,760
Speaker 2: to hide it at all. You had a pride flag, right,

673
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:42,080
Speaker 2: She just assumed you were straight.

674
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:45,040
Speaker 3: She said, who's that guy in that picture? And you

675
00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:48,680
Speaker 3: went immediately, oh yeah, yeah.

676
00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,080
Speaker 2: Like you weren't like it was just a friend, Like

677
00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:50,880
Speaker 2: you weren't lying it.

678
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:53,080
Speaker 3: It was then that I knew he'd been hiding it

679
00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 3: from me this whole time. Yeah, I'm a little airheaded

680
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:59,880
Speaker 3: and thoughtless, not very good at communicating with people in general,

681
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:04,040
Speaker 3: and can be quite thoughtless and annoying. Oh buddy, let's

682
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:06,720
Speaker 3: talk with the negative self talk. Huh. Most of my

683
00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:09,280
Speaker 3: friends back home are queer, and a lot of hers

684
00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:11,880
Speaker 3: are too, from what they all said when I met

685
00:33:11,920 --> 00:33:14,360
Speaker 3: them for the first time. I've also been told that

686
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:17,040
Speaker 3: you can tell I'm by by a lot of people,

687
00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:21,200
Speaker 3: including my own parents. So with all that, it completely

688
00:33:21,280 --> 00:33:23,880
Speaker 3: didn't occur to me to tell her. I do know, though,

689
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:26,320
Speaker 3: that it really isn't an excuse, and that I should

690
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:28,400
Speaker 3: have told her immediately in the pursuit of transparency. No,

691
00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:32,040
Speaker 3: stop it, I know. It's it's like the same thing

692
00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 3: and being like, I don't know, like I broke my

693
00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:36,680
Speaker 3: wrist when I was seven. It's like you've been lying

694
00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:39,280
Speaker 3: to me our entire relationship. I didn't know you broke

695
00:33:39,280 --> 00:33:39,720
Speaker 3: your wrists.

696
00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:44,080
Speaker 2: I think if she had said, hey, how many partners

697
00:33:44,080 --> 00:33:47,400
Speaker 2: have you had, and then you purposely withheld that one

698
00:33:47,440 --> 00:33:50,200
Speaker 2: partner that you in high school, maybe that that would

699
00:33:50,240 --> 00:33:52,719
Speaker 2: have been kind of you know, you're hiding something. But

700
00:33:52,760 --> 00:33:55,960
Speaker 2: it doesn't seem like she asked that until that moment, right,

701
00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:57,320
Speaker 2: you know, like there was no.

702
00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:02,080
Speaker 3: I'm working on my community skills and knowing when to

703
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:04,840
Speaker 3: be more mindful and mention things even if they don't

704
00:34:04,880 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 3: seem important to me. I wasn't trying to hide it,

705
00:34:07,440 --> 00:34:09,839
Speaker 3: and I wasn't trying to make her guests by leaving

706
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:12,280
Speaker 3: little hints here and there. I thought it was obvious,

707
00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:15,200
Speaker 3: so I didn't mention it. Clearly it wasn't, and I

708
00:34:15,239 --> 00:34:17,440
Speaker 3: need to be more mindful. I would never lie to

709
00:34:17,480 --> 00:34:19,400
Speaker 3: her on purpose to be malicious. You don't do that

710
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:21,239
Speaker 3: to people you love. I hate this so much.

711
00:34:21,719 --> 00:34:25,200
Speaker 2: He's taking all of this on him. Yeah, she literally said,

712
00:34:25,360 --> 00:34:28,480
Speaker 2: I don't believe that it exists. Yeah, it's a bad

713
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:29,759
Speaker 2: look for the community.

714
00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:33,160
Speaker 3: Dang, he's acting like it's like, oh, it's my bad.

715
00:34:33,239 --> 00:34:36,440
Speaker 3: I should have let her know she should be bigoted

716
00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:39,680
Speaker 3: towards me earlier. Wait, earlier, and that's all on me.

717
00:34:40,480 --> 00:34:42,920
Speaker 2: What she is telling you is I wish she had

718
00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:45,680
Speaker 2: told me earlier so that I didn't date you. That's

719
00:34:45,680 --> 00:34:46,480
Speaker 2: what she's saying.

720
00:34:47,960 --> 00:34:50,480
Speaker 3: I've been with my girlfriend for almost six months. The

721
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:52,319
Speaker 3: reason this didn't come up in the beginning of our

722
00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:55,760
Speaker 3: relationship is because it was quite a whirlwind in the beginning,

723
00:34:56,239 --> 00:34:58,200
Speaker 3: as in, we met in December and four days later

724
00:34:58,239 --> 00:35:00,759
Speaker 3: she began a week's stay at my flag, so we

725
00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:04,399
Speaker 3: moved quite fast. My girlfriend attends university close by as

726
00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:06,279
Speaker 3: well as having a job, so we may get to

727
00:35:06,320 --> 00:35:08,520
Speaker 3: see each other over the weekend or maybe a Friday

728
00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:11,160
Speaker 3: date night, but that's about it. So I like making

729
00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:13,400
Speaker 3: the most of my time with her, so we don't

730
00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:16,520
Speaker 3: talk about serious stuff all that much. People thinking that

731
00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:18,480
Speaker 3: I'm going to cheat on her or think that she

732
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:20,600
Speaker 3: thinks I'm going to cheat on her. I hope I've

733
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:22,640
Speaker 3: made it clear to her that that isn't something that

734
00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:25,360
Speaker 3: would happen. I love and adore her so much that

735
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:27,080
Speaker 3: it physically hurts when I don't get to see her

736
00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:29,359
Speaker 3: for over a week. Huh. I'm not interested in being

737
00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:33,040
Speaker 3: with anyone else spicily at all, because I'm not in

738
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:35,840
Speaker 3: love with anyone else other than her. The majority of

739
00:35:35,880 --> 00:35:39,520
Speaker 3: these comments are calling her a closet officer by phobick,

740
00:35:39,640 --> 00:35:42,279
Speaker 3: and well, I don't really know what to think about

741
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:44,800
Speaker 3: that right now. Yeah, I think we can think. Maybe

742
00:35:44,840 --> 00:35:50,120
Speaker 3: it's a possibility if she denies the existence of by people.

743
00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:54,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, buddy, sorry, Ah, it sucks. It's not something that

744
00:35:54,760 --> 00:35:58,560
Speaker 2: she can't grow and learn and you know, hopefully change

745
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:02,399
Speaker 2: her mind about, but it is a true fact right now.

746
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:04,759
Speaker 3: It's just such a weird thing to deny someone.

747
00:36:04,600 --> 00:36:06,640
Speaker 2: You don't It's like that one guy who's like I

748
00:36:06,680 --> 00:36:07,760
Speaker 2: don't think women exist.

749
00:36:08,040 --> 00:36:10,040
Speaker 3: Remember that one story we really Yeah, it's like women or

750
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:12,720
Speaker 3: women are real women. It's the beauty of the gay cation,

751
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 3: the beauty of gay Casha. It's just like this intense denial.

752
00:36:16,760 --> 00:36:21,040
Speaker 3: That's what he needs. She's one step away from being like, Ope,

753
00:36:21,080 --> 00:36:22,560
Speaker 3: I think you just need to go on a gaycation.

754
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:24,880
Speaker 3: Just get it out of your system. It's okay. I'm

755
00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:27,800
Speaker 3: okay that you can. You're gay off for a week

756
00:36:28,120 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 3: with these guys on the gay cation and just come

757
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:31,640
Speaker 3: back to me straight as an arrow. Thank you.

758
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:35,480
Speaker 2: People don't like to live in the gray area. They

759
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:39,080
Speaker 2: like black or white. They say this is either this

760
00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:41,680
Speaker 2: thing or this thing. It can't be in between.

761
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:43,160
Speaker 4: Everyone's a little bit gay.

762
00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:46,360
Speaker 3: Come on, eating the chocolate vanilla swirl cone and someone's like,

763
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:47,120
Speaker 3: that's not real.

764
00:36:47,280 --> 00:36:48,080
Speaker 2: It's not real.

765
00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:50,480
Speaker 3: It's not real. Like I'm eating it right now, it's

766
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:53,960
Speaker 3: it's real. It's like, no, it's not, it's not real. Nope,

767
00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:56,720
Speaker 3: and you're bad. I need to talk to her properly.

768
00:36:57,120 --> 00:36:59,920
Speaker 3: She's a very emotional person, which is something I absolutely

769
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:02,560
Speaker 3: door about her, but it does mean when she's angry,

770
00:37:02,640 --> 00:37:05,240
Speaker 3: she lashes out. I need to talk to her about

771
00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:07,360
Speaker 3: it all, and I need to talk to her friends.

772
00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:10,120
Speaker 3: I'm not throwing this away if she was just lashing

773
00:37:10,160 --> 00:37:13,719
Speaker 3: out or being ignorant, She's not an unreasonable person. She

774
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:16,560
Speaker 3: only knows about my most recent ex because she was

775
00:37:16,640 --> 00:37:19,839
Speaker 3: asking about a scar on my forehead the boy, and

776
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:22,680
Speaker 3: I told her the story, which included her. Yes, she

777
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 3: does love me and doesn't care about my spicy sleep

778
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:30,759
Speaker 3: drive or lack thereof. She's not manipulating or gaslighting me.

779
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:34,280
Speaker 3: She is just letting me know when I've done things wrong,

780
00:37:34,680 --> 00:37:38,359
Speaker 3: which I like because no one else ever tells when

781
00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:43,200
Speaker 3: I've done things wrong. Imby, I'm not gay, she's not

782
00:37:43,280 --> 00:37:47,680
Speaker 3: a beard. I like guys, I like girls. I love her.

783
00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:49,880
Speaker 3: If I missed anything, it's because it's three am and

784
00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:53,279
Speaker 3: I'm tired. If you want further clarification, comment and I'll

785
00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:56,799
Speaker 3: try to answer. And we have a consensus here. It's

786
00:37:56,960 --> 00:38:00,960
Speaker 3: not the ale, but we have an update here the key.

787
00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 3: What are we thinking?

788
00:38:02,360 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 2: I mean, I understand that he doesn't want to just

789
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:07,080
Speaker 2: like break up with her right away, but I also

790
00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:10,399
Speaker 2: think that there is a little bit of denial going on,

791
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:13,120
Speaker 2: a lot of bit of denial going on. I think

792
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:16,600
Speaker 2: that he's like, no, she loves me. She couldn't possibly

793
00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:18,719
Speaker 2: be thinking this about me. I know she said it,

794
00:38:18,760 --> 00:38:20,520
Speaker 2: but she couldn't possibly be thinking this.

795
00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:23,120
Speaker 3: I think it was pretty She is pretty clear being

796
00:38:23,160 --> 00:38:27,960
Speaker 3: like and for those of you saying she's a closet officer, yeah,

797
00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:30,400
Speaker 3: I'm gonna have to think about that a little bit more.

798
00:38:30,440 --> 00:38:33,040
Speaker 2: I guess like she's telling you that you made a

799
00:38:33,160 --> 00:38:34,680
Speaker 2: mistake for existing.

800
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:38,840
Speaker 3: Seems like, uh, she just doesn't want a day to

801
00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:41,120
Speaker 3: buy person. Yeah. And I want to make it clear

802
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:45,040
Speaker 3: that I feel paranoid that I'm being interpreted as saying that,

803
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:48,480
Speaker 3: like by people will cheat or are more likely to

804
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:50,759
Speaker 3: cheat because I'm being like, well, you got to you

805
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:53,560
Speaker 3: gotta watch out for more people. I'm not Look when

806
00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:56,040
Speaker 3: I say competition, I'm not being like yeah, and then

807
00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:57,720
Speaker 3: they're just gonna go cheat on me with that person.

808
00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:00,680
Speaker 3: It's like no. But it's like if I'm dating somebody

809
00:39:01,080 --> 00:39:04,240
Speaker 3: and they could theoretically leave me for Chapel Roone. Okay,

810
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:06,200
Speaker 3: and now I have to worry about Chapel Rone.

811
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:07,440
Speaker 4: You're better than Chapel Roone.

812
00:39:07,480 --> 00:39:10,160
Speaker 3: I mean sure, I can. I can gas myself up

813
00:39:10,160 --> 00:39:12,120
Speaker 3: and be like, I got I'm better than Chapel.

814
00:39:11,880 --> 00:39:14,879
Speaker 4: Roone, Are you okay but like need a confidence boost? Chad?

815
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:17,320
Speaker 4: Could you all say that Dakota is good looking because

816
00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:19,520
Speaker 4: he's now he's just scared because there's.

817
00:39:19,320 --> 00:39:21,920
Speaker 3: Stuff Chapel Roone can can bring to the table. I can't.

818
00:39:22,120 --> 00:39:25,480
Speaker 3: What do you mean? So that's the you bring so

819
00:39:25,560 --> 00:39:27,680
Speaker 3: much more? It's not about bringing more or lesser, being

820
00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:30,279
Speaker 3: better or worse. It's just about being different. So if

821
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:32,120
Speaker 3: I have a partner and they're like, I think I

822
00:39:32,160 --> 00:39:34,200
Speaker 3: want a different thing now, I don't know. I got

823
00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:37,319
Speaker 3: you right now? You know, I don't know. It's not

824
00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:40,239
Speaker 3: about being worried that they're gonna buy infidelitus. It's just

825
00:39:40,280 --> 00:39:45,919
Speaker 3: like it's an extra layer of like intricacy, undeniably right.

826
00:39:46,120 --> 00:39:48,480
Speaker 2: I feel like in trying to dig yourself out of

827
00:39:48,480 --> 00:39:50,200
Speaker 2: a hole, you I don't feel like there's a whole

828
00:39:50,239 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 2: dug in an ant tunnel system.

829
00:39:53,160 --> 00:39:55,960
Speaker 3: Okay, so you don't have to it. How is it

830
00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:57,920
Speaker 3: a whole to say that? Though it's not.

831
00:39:58,360 --> 00:40:00,680
Speaker 2: I think that you thought that you would ug yourself

832
00:40:00,680 --> 00:40:03,600
Speaker 2: a hole, and then you tried to dig yourself out

833
00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:09,120
Speaker 2: of it, and then doing so created a network of catacombs.

834
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:12,320
Speaker 4: And now you are and that lost you are lost your.

835
00:40:12,239 --> 00:40:15,160
Speaker 3: So it's just that you gotta be You gotta be

836
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:19,920
Speaker 3: on point when the competition is everybody.

837
00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:23,080
Speaker 4: What what do you mean you're by partner? If you

838
00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:26,400
Speaker 4: date a buy person and they pick you, they pick you,

839
00:40:26,640 --> 00:40:26,960
Speaker 4: all right?

840
00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:29,759
Speaker 3: Hey, Keon, how many people have you dated? Are you

841
00:40:29,840 --> 00:40:32,520
Speaker 3: dating the first person you ever dated that did that

842
00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:33,040
Speaker 3: work out?

843
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:33,560
Speaker 4: No?

844
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:36,040
Speaker 3: This is what I'm talking about. I don't end up

845
00:40:36,120 --> 00:40:38,600
Speaker 3: dating the same person all the time.

846
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,640
Speaker 2: What Dakota's saying, please can you say it the right way? Then?

847
00:40:42,719 --> 00:40:43,960
Speaker 3: Please say it?

848
00:40:44,160 --> 00:40:45,839
Speaker 2: No, I just think you've already said it and you're

849
00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:47,439
Speaker 2: trying to dig yourself out of a hole.

850
00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:50,240
Speaker 3: That now I feel like I've just been saying it wrong.

851
00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:51,839
Speaker 3: You said you say?

852
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:59,319
Speaker 2: Dakota is saying that when you're dating someone you're you

853
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:03,319
Speaker 2: might be concern that there's better people out there, and

854
00:41:03,360 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 2: when you are dating a bye person you're doubly concerned.

855
00:41:07,520 --> 00:41:10,799
Speaker 2: That doesn't mean that's cooking they want to cheat on you.

856
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:13,960
Speaker 2: But my point is I don't think you were ever

857
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:15,880
Speaker 2: in a hole. I think you thought you were in

858
00:41:15,920 --> 00:41:17,600
Speaker 2: a hole, and you try to think yourself.

859
00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:19,640
Speaker 3: We're talking about me now, No, don't talk about me.

860
00:41:19,680 --> 00:41:23,040
Speaker 3: Talking about the point, talking about the point you're not

861
00:41:23,080 --> 00:41:23,680
Speaker 3: cooking anymore.

862
00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's right. Maya Jambalaya update.

863
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:29,640
Speaker 3: I hope y'all liked that too. That was fun. No,

864
00:41:30,080 --> 00:41:33,000
Speaker 3: I know it's okay. I just wanted to make sure

865
00:41:33,719 --> 00:41:37,560
Speaker 3: you would. No, I don't think that.

866
00:41:37,880 --> 00:41:39,920
Speaker 1: Hey it's sam og Host. We're going get back to

867
00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:42,520
Speaker 1: these delectable stories. But here's three minutes of ads from

868
00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:43,959
Speaker 1: our sponsors to help support the show.

869
00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:48,360
Speaker 3: I posted my initial post on Friday night. I hadn't

870
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:51,439
Speaker 3: seen or heard from my girlfriend since Tuesday. I sent

871
00:41:51,520 --> 00:41:54,520
Speaker 3: her the link to this post on Saturday afternoon and

872
00:41:54,640 --> 00:41:56,600
Speaker 3: told her that once she felt ready, I would like

873
00:41:56,640 --> 00:41:58,560
Speaker 3: it if she came over so we could talk about

874
00:41:58,600 --> 00:42:01,480
Speaker 3: it in person. About three hours later, she was at

875
00:42:01,520 --> 00:42:04,200
Speaker 3: my flat. She hadn't eaten and it was late, so

876
00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:07,520
Speaker 3: I cooked and we ate in silence. She didn't really

877
00:42:07,520 --> 00:42:10,800
Speaker 3: look mad, but she obviously wasn't very happy. It's crazy

878
00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:13,200
Speaker 3: hearing this because I feel like, OHP is the one

879
00:42:13,239 --> 00:42:14,000
Speaker 3: who should be mad.

880
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:16,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like, OHP is so stuck in the thinking

881
00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:20,759
Speaker 2: that he's done something wrong when he literally just exists

882
00:42:21,280 --> 00:42:24,359
Speaker 2: and she's recogning with her own And I think by

883
00:42:24,480 --> 00:42:28,760
Speaker 2: letting her think that you've done something wrong. It's giving

884
00:42:28,840 --> 00:42:35,480
Speaker 2: her like you're kind of validating her point right, not intentionally,

885
00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:37,200
Speaker 2: of course, like you're not doing anything wrong, but like

886
00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:39,719
Speaker 2: I think that in her mind she's like, oh, well,

887
00:42:39,760 --> 00:42:42,360
Speaker 2: you admitted it, so I'm right there you go, but

888
00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:43,360
Speaker 2: you've done nothing wrong.

889
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:43,719
Speaker 4: Right.

890
00:42:44,040 --> 00:42:46,560
Speaker 3: Once we had finished and I'd cleaned up, she told

891
00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:49,800
Speaker 3: me that she's sorry she's ignored me for four days bikes.

892
00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:53,440
Speaker 3: I told her that it was fine and that she

893
00:42:53,480 --> 00:42:59,000
Speaker 3: didn't need to apologize, and she clearly needed space. I

894
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:01,640
Speaker 3: decided to bite the and just get into it. I

895
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:05,759
Speaker 3: apologized for not telling her properly this time. I told

896
00:43:05,760 --> 00:43:08,000
Speaker 3: her that I shouldn't have assumed she'd just be okay

897
00:43:08,040 --> 00:43:11,080
Speaker 3: with it because I expected her to. I told her

898
00:43:11,160 --> 00:43:13,080
Speaker 3: that even if I don't think it's a big deal

899
00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:15,120
Speaker 3: or that it didn't even cross my mind, that I

900
00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:17,600
Speaker 3: had to tell her, I understood that it was clearly

901
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:19,960
Speaker 3: dishonest of me, and that I don't really have a

902
00:43:19,960 --> 00:43:21,320
Speaker 3: good excuse for why didn't.

903
00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:23,240
Speaker 2: Brother is you do have a good excuse.

904
00:43:23,400 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 3: To be clear, this is all wrong, and he I

905
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:30,759
Speaker 3: feel like this the OP feels like just like all

906
00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:33,360
Speaker 3: the responsibility to address or fix any problem in the

907
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:36,960
Speaker 3: relationship is on him. Yeah, even when it comes down

908
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:40,600
Speaker 3: to like, oh, you just don't accept my actual identity. Okay,

909
00:43:40,680 --> 00:43:42,160
Speaker 3: I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done.

910
00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:46,080
Speaker 2: That, Like you're apologizing for being yourself.

911
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:49,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, so don't do that. Like you can do that

912
00:43:49,480 --> 00:43:52,359
Speaker 3: in a political tactical way where it's like I'm just

913
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:55,640
Speaker 3: making I'm appeasing somebody, but like, don't ever feel in

914
00:43:55,680 --> 00:43:59,399
Speaker 3: your heart that, like you're like, ah, yeah, this thing

915
00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:00,919
Speaker 3: I wasn't hiding from you.

916
00:44:01,040 --> 00:44:04,160
Speaker 2: Even I literally said, I shouldn't have assumed you would

917
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:07,000
Speaker 2: have been okay dating a by person, which is crazy.

918
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:10,360
Speaker 3: What I tried to never lie to her, especially about

919
00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:13,000
Speaker 3: important things. And whilst I don't see this is lying

920
00:44:13,080 --> 00:44:15,759
Speaker 3: because it's not, I now do see that it could

921
00:44:15,760 --> 00:44:19,360
Speaker 3: be interpreted as that, or that I've got things to hide.

922
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:21,520
Speaker 3: I told her as such, and she told me to

923
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:25,799
Speaker 3: stop apologizing. Okay, she said something right. She explained that

924
00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:28,239
Speaker 3: she'd read my post as well as the comments, and

925
00:44:28,280 --> 00:44:30,480
Speaker 3: I asked what she thought about it. She was quiet

926
00:44:30,480 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 3: for a minute before she told me that she didn't

927
00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:36,279
Speaker 3: like people calling her a closet office and that she

928
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:39,440
Speaker 3: didn't think she was being that She just didn't understand

929
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:40,640
Speaker 3: how a person could be.

930
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:45,560
Speaker 2: By b B, I don't even understand that. You don't

931
00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:48,319
Speaker 2: What do you mean to understand? I don't just again,

932
00:44:48,400 --> 00:44:53,360
Speaker 2: imagine likes man, imagine personalize everyone?

933
00:44:54,000 --> 00:44:58,200
Speaker 3: What imagine that sentence? Any other concept. It's like saying

934
00:44:58,280 --> 00:45:00,360
Speaker 3: I don't understand how someone can be woman.

935
00:45:00,480 --> 00:45:04,360
Speaker 2: It's like a person likes orange, person likes apple.

936
00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:07,000
Speaker 3: Yuh, you like blof what?

937
00:45:07,520 --> 00:45:09,680
Speaker 4: I have an apple? I have a pen?

938
00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:14,120
Speaker 3: He on? But how are you Filipino? When you're Jewish

939
00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:16,320
Speaker 3: you have to be one? How does that work? I

940
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:17,239
Speaker 3: don't understand it.

941
00:45:17,520 --> 00:45:22,080
Speaker 2: And that actually is a lot of history. That's what

942
00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:22,560
Speaker 2: they did.

943
00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:25,640
Speaker 4: So when a man and a woman fall in love

944
00:45:26,360 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 4: and now what wait? What is a man? And now

945
00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:30,839
Speaker 4: I don't understand?

946
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:34,239
Speaker 3: Okay. I tried to stay calm because I could see

947
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:38,040
Speaker 3: she was overthinking and getting upset. I told her that

948
00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:41,120
Speaker 3: I don't think she's a closet officer either, not as

949
00:45:41,600 --> 00:45:44,640
Speaker 3: a whole anyway, and then I tried to explain it

950
00:45:44,680 --> 00:45:47,239
Speaker 3: to her as simply as possible. I didn't want her

951
00:45:47,320 --> 00:45:49,080
Speaker 3: to think I was speaking to her like a child,

952
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:51,520
Speaker 3: or that I was being condescending, but I did have

953
00:45:51,560 --> 00:45:54,040
Speaker 3: to use simple terms to make sure there was absolutely

954
00:45:54,040 --> 00:45:57,800
Speaker 3: no room for misinterpretation. I asked her, but you understand

955
00:45:57,840 --> 00:46:01,000
Speaker 3: how guys can like girls and how girls can like guys,

956
00:46:01,400 --> 00:46:04,800
Speaker 3: and she said yes. I then asked, do you also

957
00:46:04,920 --> 00:46:08,000
Speaker 3: understand how a woman could like another woman or how

958
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:11,320
Speaker 3: a guy could like another guy? And she said yes again.

959
00:46:11,719 --> 00:46:14,000
Speaker 3: I then said, okay, now stick with me.

960
00:46:14,280 --> 00:46:14,960
Speaker 2: Stick with me.

961
00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:17,759
Speaker 3: I asked her then why she didn't think it could

962
00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:20,280
Speaker 3: be possible to like girls as well as.

963
00:46:20,239 --> 00:46:22,319
Speaker 2: Guys, and she's like, well, now you've lost me.

964
00:46:23,440 --> 00:46:26,840
Speaker 3: And she didn't really say anything, dude, because the gears

965
00:46:26,840 --> 00:46:30,520
Speaker 3: in her head got stuck. She's like, and the smoke

966
00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:32,720
Speaker 3: started to fizzle out of her ears.

967
00:46:32,520 --> 00:46:35,000
Speaker 2: And Smantha Elisa's girlfriend is an idiot. The thing is

968
00:46:35,040 --> 00:46:39,960
Speaker 2: that it's not even like idiocy, because I know a

969
00:46:40,000 --> 00:46:42,480
Speaker 2: lot of people in my life who also share this

970
00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:47,560
Speaker 2: same thinking, who are very smart. And I'm like, how,

971
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:53,280
Speaker 2: but it's this like cognitive dissonance, And I'm like, I

972
00:46:53,280 --> 00:46:55,799
Speaker 2: I don't understand how you can just not put two

973
00:46:55,880 --> 00:46:56,480
Speaker 2: and two together.

974
00:46:57,640 --> 00:46:59,480
Speaker 4: Yes, Maya, Well now you've lost me.

975
00:46:59,680 --> 00:47:04,480
Speaker 2: It's like this intense binary thinking that they cannot allow

976
00:47:04,560 --> 00:47:06,080
Speaker 2: themselves to break out, of which I.

977
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:11,200
Speaker 3: Binary thinking, and I could see the cogs turning in

978
00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:13,880
Speaker 3: her head. She said that she couldn't see how you

979
00:47:13,880 --> 00:47:18,480
Speaker 3: could like both. Humans are hardwired to like only one gender,

980
00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:21,720
Speaker 3: and so if I was saying that I liked guys first,

981
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:24,120
Speaker 3: and by her logic, I could only be attracted to

982
00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:27,799
Speaker 3: one gender, then I must be gay. I was very

983
00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:30,840
Speaker 3: confused because I'm not a scientist by any means, but

984
00:47:30,880 --> 00:47:34,279
Speaker 3: I definitely know that that isn't true. I'm not a scientist,

985
00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:36,640
Speaker 3: but I do know I'm dating a woman right now,

986
00:47:36,800 --> 00:47:38,000
Speaker 3: so I don't know.

987
00:47:38,400 --> 00:47:41,400
Speaker 2: I do know I am in love and attracted to

988
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:42,600
Speaker 2: a woman right now.

989
00:47:42,760 --> 00:47:45,880
Speaker 3: So you're wrong between a rock and a hard place.

990
00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:48,920
Speaker 2: It's like staring at the man being like, yeah, that's blue,

991
00:47:48,960 --> 00:47:51,000
Speaker 2: and someone be like, no, it's green. I'm telling you

992
00:47:51,040 --> 00:47:53,680
Speaker 2: it's screen. Yeah, but it's a scientists said it was green,

993
00:47:53,800 --> 00:47:56,600
Speaker 2: and then they're like, no, I'm looking at it right now.

994
00:47:56,760 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 3: Like you know the color green. So when you take

995
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:03,080
Speaker 3: the color blue and yellow, it makes green no no, no, no,

996
00:48:03,080 --> 00:48:05,399
Speaker 3: no no no no, only blue or yellow? Only blue

997
00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:08,960
Speaker 3: or yellow? No green, no green, yellow. My socks are

998
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:11,319
Speaker 3: blue because if you put both those colors together, then

999
00:48:11,360 --> 00:48:13,319
Speaker 3: it's a different color and we can't have that, dude.

1000
00:48:13,320 --> 00:48:15,839
Speaker 2: I've got I've got blue, green, and yellow right here.

1001
00:48:16,200 --> 00:48:20,040
Speaker 3: I asked where she had heard this. She told me

1002
00:48:20,120 --> 00:48:21,879
Speaker 3: that an old friend who she met at her old

1003
00:48:21,960 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 3: job was a major LGBTQ activist and was explaining things

1004
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:27,920
Speaker 3: to her. Okay, so this is really interesting.

1005
00:48:28,520 --> 00:48:34,520
Speaker 2: Did she use those words? Did she say LGBTQ, Did

1006
00:48:34,560 --> 00:48:37,000
Speaker 2: she say lgb TQ.

1007
00:48:37,480 --> 00:48:42,160
Speaker 3: No, there's there is a thing within the gay community.

1008
00:48:42,239 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know there is a lot of by in

1009
00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:46,120
Speaker 2: the queer community and it's absolutely.

1010
00:48:45,600 --> 00:48:47,280
Speaker 3: Been around for a long time.

1011
00:48:47,400 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, no, it's on both sides.

1012
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:52,239
Speaker 3: It makes perfect sense for her to have heard this

1013
00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:56,400
Speaker 3: from somebody I'm just saying who was probably positioning presenting

1014
00:48:56,440 --> 00:49:00,480
Speaker 3: themselves as like I'm an authority on this.

1015
00:49:00,640 --> 00:49:03,839
Speaker 2: I just think it is hilarious if she said, yeah,

1016
00:49:03,880 --> 00:49:06,920
Speaker 2: I've I know if my friend is a major LGBTQ

1017
00:49:07,080 --> 00:49:10,600
Speaker 2: activity activist, and I'd be like, sorry, be what's the

1018
00:49:10,880 --> 00:49:13,160
Speaker 2: what's the before THEB?

1019
00:49:14,280 --> 00:49:14,480
Speaker 3: What?

1020
00:49:15,280 --> 00:49:16,440
Speaker 2: So I didn't hear that?

1021
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:19,560
Speaker 3: What literally in the in the acronym?

1022
00:49:19,680 --> 00:49:21,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, She's like, no, no, no, bee stands for bigot.

1023
00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:25,000
Speaker 3: Oh my god. I told her that's not right. She

1024
00:49:25,120 --> 00:49:28,279
Speaker 3: told me it was. I asked what possible evidence she

1025
00:49:28,320 --> 00:49:30,880
Speaker 3: could have for that. She didn't have any, But she

1026
00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:33,440
Speaker 3: said that this friend was deep into the queer community.

1027
00:49:33,719 --> 00:49:37,120
Speaker 3: I don't know him, I didn't ask, and that I'm

1028
00:49:37,160 --> 00:49:40,120
Speaker 3: not really involved, so she's more inclined to believe is old,

1029
00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:41,960
Speaker 3: this old friend rather than me.

1030
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:44,360
Speaker 2: Oh, oh my god, she has learned nothing.

1031
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:46,920
Speaker 3: All I have to say is it's Pride Month. Yeah.

1032
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:49,479
Speaker 3: I was hurt, of course, really hurt that she would

1033
00:49:49,480 --> 00:49:52,000
Speaker 3: say this, But I couldn't get mad because then we'd

1034
00:49:52,040 --> 00:49:53,880
Speaker 3: just both be mad at upset, and we'd be in

1035
00:49:53,960 --> 00:49:56,600
Speaker 3: exactly the same place we were five days ago. So

1036
00:49:56,640 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 3: I decided to change tactics. Is the tactic breaking up

1037
00:50:00,280 --> 00:50:00,640
Speaker 3: with her?

1038
00:50:00,880 --> 00:50:01,280
Speaker 2: Please?

1039
00:50:01,640 --> 00:50:04,640
Speaker 3: I asked her that if I've had a boyfriend, and

1040
00:50:04,800 --> 00:50:08,279
Speaker 3: if I'm not secretive about liking guys, why on earth

1041
00:50:08,280 --> 00:50:11,120
Speaker 3: would I be dating her. I told her that me

1042
00:50:11,239 --> 00:50:14,040
Speaker 3: admitting I like guys clearly shows that expressing that kind

1043
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 3: of attraction wasn't an issue for me, So why would

1044
00:50:16,640 --> 00:50:19,000
Speaker 3: I be using her as a cover And what would

1045
00:50:19,000 --> 00:50:21,040
Speaker 3: be the point of using her as a cover if

1046
00:50:21,120 --> 00:50:24,520
Speaker 3: I was a gay in the first place. She told

1047
00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:27,200
Speaker 3: me it's because I was embarrassed. I asked her about

1048
00:50:27,320 --> 00:50:31,080
Speaker 3: what again? Goalposts moved. I asked her about what she

1049
00:50:31,160 --> 00:50:34,759
Speaker 3: said that you like guys, I told her, I'm not embarrassed.

1050
00:50:35,239 --> 00:50:37,399
Speaker 3: I asked her if I looked embarrassed at any point

1051
00:50:37,400 --> 00:50:39,279
Speaker 3: on the day all this went down. I asked her

1052
00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:43,520
Speaker 3: if I looked embarrassed now, and then she reluctantly said no.

1053
00:50:44,120 --> 00:50:47,520
Speaker 3: I asked her why I would agree to and actively

1054
00:50:47,640 --> 00:50:51,120
Speaker 3: pursue dating her if I wasn't attracted to girls. She

1055
00:50:51,200 --> 00:50:53,800
Speaker 3: got mad at this point, but I eventually managed to

1056
00:50:53,840 --> 00:50:57,840
Speaker 3: calm her down. Again. Get me mad at this point, brother, you.

1057
00:50:57,960 --> 00:51:00,160
Speaker 2: Just really admiring Opie's pation.

1058
00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:02,719
Speaker 3: We took a breather. I went to my room, she

1059
00:51:02,800 --> 00:51:05,319
Speaker 3: went to the balcony, and when we reconvened back in

1060
00:51:05,320 --> 00:51:07,920
Speaker 3: the living room, she asked why I was dating her.

1061
00:51:08,160 --> 00:51:11,560
Speaker 3: I told her because I love her, That's why. I

1062
00:51:11,600 --> 00:51:13,440
Speaker 3: told her that I thought she was funny and smart

1063
00:51:13,480 --> 00:51:15,600
Speaker 3: and gorgeous, and that she had so much life in

1064
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:17,560
Speaker 3: her that I found it a privilege to even be

1065
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:21,080
Speaker 3: near her, let alone to date her. She told me

1066
00:51:21,160 --> 00:51:24,400
Speaker 3: that she believed me, but she still didn't understand. She

1067
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:26,760
Speaker 3: asked if it was a phase, then, oh, my school

1068
00:51:26,760 --> 00:51:29,480
Speaker 3: and I told her no. I said to her plainly,

1069
00:51:29,640 --> 00:51:32,640
Speaker 3: I am attracted to girls and I'm attracted to guys.

1070
00:51:33,160 --> 00:51:35,080
Speaker 3: She asked me if this meant I wanted to date

1071
00:51:35,120 --> 00:51:38,400
Speaker 3: a guy then instead of her. I told her, no, Babe,

1072
00:51:38,560 --> 00:51:40,240
Speaker 3: this is in This would.

1073
00:51:40,120 --> 00:51:45,040
Speaker 5: Drive me insane. This would drive me insane. I like

1074
00:51:45,160 --> 00:51:50,880
Speaker 5: Scorsese movies. I like Spielberg movies. I can watch both

1075
00:51:50,960 --> 00:51:51,880
Speaker 5: of them.

1076
00:51:52,040 --> 00:51:55,359
Speaker 2: Like like, this is like debating with a child, right,

1077
00:51:55,680 --> 00:51:58,520
Speaker 2: They're like, why is the sky blue? This guy's blue?

1078
00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:00,760
Speaker 2: But why I don't understand what this guy's blue?

1079
00:52:00,760 --> 00:52:03,560
Speaker 3: Do you like spaghetti or do you like penney? You

1080
00:52:03,680 --> 00:52:07,680
Speaker 3: only get one, and if you pick both, I hate you.

1081
00:52:08,000 --> 00:52:11,600
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm I'm comparing being gay to very trivial,

1082
00:52:11,760 --> 00:52:16,360
Speaker 3: trivial things, but not on purpose, but just to illustrate

1083
00:52:16,600 --> 00:52:19,799
Speaker 3: how absurd her lact of understanding it.

1084
00:52:19,880 --> 00:52:21,640
Speaker 2: You're doing it well, it makes sense.

1085
00:52:22,040 --> 00:52:24,120
Speaker 3: She asked if I wanted to date a guy as

1086
00:52:24,200 --> 00:52:28,240
Speaker 3: well as her, and again I said no. She asked

1087
00:52:28,680 --> 00:52:32,879
Speaker 3: why I was so determined to be acknowledged as by, which.

1088
00:52:32,960 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 2: Is insane because he never even brought it up.

1089
00:52:38,000 --> 00:52:42,800
Speaker 3: He wasn't yearning to be acknowledged as by he thought

1090
00:52:42,840 --> 00:52:46,240
Speaker 3: she was upset that she thought he was lying quote

1091
00:52:46,320 --> 00:52:50,160
Speaker 3: unquote to her the whole time. He's so nonchalant about it,

1092
00:52:50,680 --> 00:52:54,240
Speaker 3: he doesn't even care. I told her, being a bye

1093
00:52:54,360 --> 00:52:57,040
Speaker 3: is just a fact about me, just like that I

1094
00:52:57,080 --> 00:52:59,879
Speaker 3: love books and the color purple, and that I hate

1095
00:52:59,880 --> 00:53:03,279
Speaker 3: the smell of grape scented felt tips. I told her

1096
00:53:03,320 --> 00:53:05,800
Speaker 3: those were all facts about me too, but they don't

1097
00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:09,120
Speaker 3: affect our relationship, so neither should this one. I asked

1098
00:53:09,160 --> 00:53:11,520
Speaker 3: her why it bothered her so much, besides the whole

1099
00:53:11,719 --> 00:53:15,680
Speaker 3: not believing by people exist thing, I said, I know

1100
00:53:15,760 --> 00:53:18,000
Speaker 3: it's more than that, because you wouldn't have gotten so

1101
00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:21,080
Speaker 3: angry if it was just that. She explained that she

1102
00:53:21,239 --> 00:53:23,719
Speaker 3: thought me telling her was my way of hinting I

1103
00:53:23,760 --> 00:53:27,440
Speaker 3: was going to break up with her. I laughed ahaha,

1104
00:53:28,440 --> 00:53:31,360
Speaker 3: and asked in what world that would make sense. I

1105
00:53:31,440 --> 00:53:34,120
Speaker 3: had told her because she asked, and that if I

1106
00:53:34,160 --> 00:53:36,359
Speaker 3: was going to break up with her, which wasn't going

1107
00:53:36,400 --> 00:53:39,160
Speaker 3: to happen, then I would have just done it and

1108
00:53:39,239 --> 00:53:41,840
Speaker 3: not been cruel about it or dragged it out. Is

1109
00:53:42,080 --> 00:53:44,640
Speaker 3: just a fact that she saw that as that that's

1110
00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:47,600
Speaker 3: what you were doing. Such a red flag because that

1111
00:53:47,719 --> 00:53:49,040
Speaker 3: means she would do that.

1112
00:53:49,320 --> 00:53:50,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, she would do.

1113
00:53:50,560 --> 00:53:53,040
Speaker 3: That to you. She said that she thought me saying

1114
00:53:53,120 --> 00:53:55,560
Speaker 3: I was by and her not thinking it was real

1115
00:53:56,120 --> 00:53:58,360
Speaker 3: was me trying to take the easy way out, so

1116
00:53:58,400 --> 00:54:01,520
Speaker 3: she got mad. Almost two am on Sunday by the

1117
00:54:01,520 --> 00:54:03,840
Speaker 3: time we got to this point, so we decided to

1118
00:54:03,840 --> 00:54:06,279
Speaker 3: stop and carry on in the morning. When I woke up,

1119
00:54:06,320 --> 00:54:08,360
Speaker 3: I was worried and trying to prepare my points in

1120
00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:10,680
Speaker 3: my head, like I do before I say anything important.

1121
00:54:10,920 --> 00:54:13,759
Speaker 3: But I didn't really have to. My girlfriend walked back

1122
00:54:13,840 --> 00:54:16,359
Speaker 3: into the bedroom with two mugs. She made me sit

1123
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:18,719
Speaker 3: up and handed it to me with the promise that

1124
00:54:18,760 --> 00:54:21,760
Speaker 3: she could speak first. I nodded and took the mug.

1125
00:54:22,000 --> 00:54:24,520
Speaker 3: The speaking mugs, she sat next to me and said

1126
00:54:24,520 --> 00:54:27,040
Speaker 3: that she didn't sleep well, that she couldn't stop thinking

1127
00:54:27,040 --> 00:54:30,440
Speaker 3: about everything, and she said that she still didn't understand,

1128
00:54:30,840 --> 00:54:33,600
Speaker 3: not really, but that she loves me and she knows

1129
00:54:33,640 --> 00:54:35,560
Speaker 3: that I love her, and she's going to try and

1130
00:54:35,640 --> 00:54:38,279
Speaker 3: understand because she didn't want to lose me or what

1131
00:54:38,360 --> 00:54:40,880
Speaker 3: we have, and that she doesn't like to be ignorant.

1132
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:44,400
Speaker 3: Dang man, I guess the best thing she could have said,

1133
00:54:44,880 --> 00:54:47,440
Speaker 3: other than like, oh, I get it.

1134
00:54:47,120 --> 00:54:51,239
Speaker 2: It took so long just to get there exhausting. It's

1135
00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:52,400
Speaker 2: like a full labor.

1136
00:54:52,680 --> 00:54:56,080
Speaker 3: I thanked her and said I'd send her some resources.

1137
00:54:56,440 --> 00:54:59,160
Speaker 3: So if you guys have any that explain byness or

1138
00:54:59,200 --> 00:55:01,880
Speaker 3: anything in that van and then please link them. We

1139
00:55:01,960 --> 00:55:04,359
Speaker 3: agreed that we would try and push past this, and

1140
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:06,560
Speaker 3: that we would make sure to tell each other everything

1141
00:55:06,560 --> 00:55:09,400
Speaker 3: from now on, no matter if it seemed or important

1142
00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:12,879
Speaker 3: or not. She's taking counseling at her university to try

1143
00:55:12,920 --> 00:55:15,879
Speaker 3: and manage her anger and control her emotions. And by

1144
00:55:15,920 --> 00:55:19,880
Speaker 3: the way, you can control how many full episodes with

1145
00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:22,720
Speaker 3: stories just like this you listen to, and it should

1146
00:55:22,760 --> 00:55:24,839
Speaker 3: be all of them. You can go listen to them.

1147
00:55:24,840 --> 00:55:29,720
Speaker 3: It's Spotify or iHeartRadio or Apple podcasts wherever you listen

1148
00:55:30,040 --> 00:55:33,279
Speaker 3: to podcasts. Just search Okay story time and you can

1149
00:55:33,320 --> 00:55:37,879
Speaker 3: listen to over two thousand episodes. Crazy yeah, But what's

1150
00:55:37,920 --> 00:55:40,160
Speaker 3: even crazier is we're almost at the end of the story.

1151
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:45,520
Speaker 2: Thank goodness. Wow, this person is op he is a saint,

1152
00:55:45,920 --> 00:55:50,280
Speaker 2: and his girlfriend is just frustrating Opie.

1153
00:55:50,320 --> 00:55:52,520
Speaker 3: You might as well just become an Olympic track start

1154
00:55:52,520 --> 00:55:54,080
Speaker 3: the amount of circles you're running in.

1155
00:55:54,120 --> 00:55:59,200
Speaker 2: With with your girlfriend's guy because wow, yeah, Wow.

1156
00:55:59,040 --> 00:56:01,440
Speaker 3: That's the end of it for now. Ye We're obviously

1157
00:56:01,440 --> 00:56:03,799
Speaker 3: still in rocky waters. And if anything else happens and

1158
00:56:03,840 --> 00:56:05,960
Speaker 3: people want me to update, then I will. But I

1159
00:56:05,960 --> 00:56:08,560
Speaker 3: think that's basically all of it. Our talk on Sunday

1160
00:56:08,600 --> 00:56:10,560
Speaker 3: morning was long, but I summed it up as this

1161
00:56:10,680 --> 00:56:13,560
Speaker 3: post is very long already. Also for the people asking

1162
00:56:13,600 --> 00:56:16,200
Speaker 3: me to ask her friends about if they knew about

1163
00:56:16,200 --> 00:56:18,879
Speaker 3: this behavior, I asked one of her friends whose number

1164
00:56:18,920 --> 00:56:21,120
Speaker 3: I have, and she said that it wasn't an issue

1165
00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:23,719
Speaker 3: a few years ago, but she suddenly started asking about

1166
00:56:23,719 --> 00:56:26,640
Speaker 3: it around the same time she had met that girl

1167
00:56:26,719 --> 00:56:29,720
Speaker 3: from her old job. Apparently everyone in the friend group

1168
00:56:29,760 --> 00:56:32,360
Speaker 3: had called her stupid or something for believing that, but

1169
00:56:32,480 --> 00:56:35,319
Speaker 3: that was all that really happened. I've asked about who

1170
00:56:35,320 --> 00:56:39,280
Speaker 3: this old coworker is, but I haven't gotten a reply yet. Okay,

1171
00:56:39,360 --> 00:56:41,640
Speaker 3: thanks everyone, And that is the end of that story.

1172
00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:43,520
Speaker 3: So even her friends were like, yeah, she I don't know.

1173
00:56:43,920 --> 00:56:46,000
Speaker 3: Somebody told her by people weren't real and she just

1174
00:56:46,280 --> 00:56:48,239
Speaker 3: ate it up and we all called her sleeping that.

1175
00:56:48,960 --> 00:56:51,040
Speaker 2: He was just like, yeah, that guy told me, and

1176
00:56:51,080 --> 00:56:52,839
Speaker 2: everyone's like, what guy, And she's like, I don't know.

1177
00:56:53,200 --> 00:56:55,680
Speaker 2: He's not here anymore, he doesn't go here anymore. I

1178
00:56:55,719 --> 00:56:56,000
Speaker 2: don't know.

1179
00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:58,160
Speaker 3: But he said he was King of the gays. Yeah,

1180
00:56:58,200 --> 00:57:00,520
Speaker 3: so I believed him, you know. I I took him

1181
00:57:00,520 --> 00:57:01,280
Speaker 3: as an authority.

1182
00:57:01,440 --> 00:57:04,320
Speaker 2: But folks, that's the end of that story.

1183
00:57:04,239 --> 00:57:05,799
Speaker 3: And the end of that episode.

1184
00:57:06,160 --> 00:57:08,920
Speaker 2: So if you love us, make sure to subscribe.

1185
00:57:08,960 --> 00:57:11,839
Speaker 3: We love you and see you tomorrow.