Speaker 1: Are you leaving?
Speaker 2: I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 3: Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how
Speaker 3: much baggage you claim and give us time and a
Speaker 3: terminol and gay.
Speaker 2: We want to send you off in style.
Speaker 1: We wanna welcome you back home. Tell us all about
Speaker 1: ity scared her? Was it fine?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 1: Porn? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 2: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do your need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do your need to ride?
Speaker 2: Ride with Karen and Chris welcome to Do you need
Speaker 2: a ride? This is Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 1: And this is Karen Kilgarriff.
Speaker 2: We are childless cat ladies and we are taking this
Speaker 2: country back. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Sorry, cat style.
Speaker 2: Sorry big families with dogs.
Speaker 1: You're screwed. M I think it's funny that anyone would
Speaker 1: come at childless cat ladies like you. Clearly don't know
Speaker 1: what you're dealing with. In coming at childless cath lady.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the least threatening person you know.
Speaker 1: Who also let's attack usually has a big fucking brain,
Speaker 1: a lot of funny things to say. Uh, truly doesn't
Speaker 1: give a shit what people think.
Speaker 2: Probably hasn't had kids because of compassionate reasons they're making.
Speaker 1: They're making quality choices in their life.
Speaker 2: Yeah, doesn't want to bring a kid into your world?
Speaker 2: JD Grandpa, j D, b J TG kDa. Just why
Speaker 2: are you hiding that your name is Tommy or Bobby
Speaker 2: or Billy? Grow up?
Speaker 1: Does it sound.
Speaker 2: These initial names? And I mean everybody, every single one.
Speaker 2: It's for little leaguers. Come on, BJ, give it a
Speaker 2: little poke.
Speaker 1: But I do love there are people who have three initials.
Speaker 1: C Pounder is the person I'm thinking of, the great actress. Uh.
Speaker 2: Cch Pounder is her name? Are these adult films?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 1: Less?
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I don't know cch is.
Speaker 1: Yes, you do. If I showed you a picture, you go,
Speaker 1: I know her?
Speaker 2: Are they a listener?
Speaker 1: Well, oh my god if that was a reveal.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry. It's an interesting name.
Speaker 1: And also it would be the coolest if suddenly you're
Speaker 1: getting blown up on Instagram because cch Pounder cares about
Speaker 1: this podcast.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, I take back what I said about the
Speaker 2: adult film industry. One I respect, by the way, and support. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm I'm not. I don't want to make waves with
Speaker 2: anybody except you BJ's and TJ's and pg's.
Speaker 1: Anyone with initials two initials specifically, what about her? Sorry,
Speaker 1: she has and so she doesn't she doesn't get added
Speaker 1: into your pile, on into your cancelation.
Speaker 2: Oh, yes, I'm looking at a picture for now.
Speaker 3: Oh on a Lisa's showing Christ Yes, sure, yeah, right, yes,
Speaker 3: I'm trying to think of what There's been so many moves,
Speaker 3: you know, when they when you have a thousand to
Speaker 3: choose from, it's hard to pick one.
Speaker 2: In your mind.
Speaker 1: On at least you want to read a couple of those.
Speaker 1: I'm credits selecting absolutely once I get this eye.
Speaker 2: That's I can't think of another three initial name.
Speaker 1: I don't think the Shield Avatar, oh, RoboCop.
Speaker 2: Three, Yeah, don't say anything about the Shield. I haven't
Speaker 2: watched season fourteen.
Speaker 1: Yet from nineteen ninety five.
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's not go through with the anguish of that
Speaker 2: last time when you guys spoiled Bones for me.
Speaker 1: The entire run, the twenty two years of Bones were
Speaker 1: totally ruined. I can't get over there.
Speaker 2: You do. Oh wow, it seems like but you're doing
Speaker 2: the right thing.
Speaker 1: I know it feels wrong, but it is right.
Speaker 2: That's why it feels so right. Did I tell you
Speaker 2: about the time around a cruise and my sister bought
Speaker 2: us a wrong, like it's just the length of fabric
Speaker 2: she put it on, and very to herself said, I
Speaker 2: don't know why it's called us a wrong when it
Speaker 2: feels so right. And I laughed for the rest that's
Speaker 2: I laughed at the cruise ship took us to the
Speaker 2: Bahamas on my laughs. Yes, it became a fuel.
Speaker 1: Lisa Fairbanks knows how to make a joke. Yep, there's
Speaker 1: no there's no doubting that she helped coach me on
Speaker 1: some of my early joke making. I mean, I feel
Speaker 1: like most comedians have funny siblings, and sometimes funny are
Speaker 1: siblings to thank for their careers.
Speaker 2: Yeah, as he is a comic that I do a
Speaker 2: lot of shows with and he did a video with
Speaker 2: his brother who's like a lawyer or a doctor. He's
Speaker 2: got and he was so funny. Yeah, and they aren't twins,
Speaker 2: but look like twins. I love, first of all. I
Speaker 2: love meaning a sibling of someone that where they have
Speaker 2: like the same voice and same mannerisms, but it's a
Speaker 2: different person. It always blows me away. Yeah, not twin,
Speaker 2: And it's just when it's they're so similar but obviously
Speaker 2: a different person. Martha Kelly's obvious person.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you can tell on site that this is not Yes.
Speaker 2: It's two people, because I've checked and my eyes aren't crossed.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's the yeah hearing two siblings laugh and see
Speaker 2: that they have the same laugh and realize that they
Speaker 2: don't know they have the same laugh. Yeah. I love
Speaker 2: studying brothers and sisters.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what about the show Brothers and Sisters.
Speaker 2: Oh, don't give any spoilers that.
Speaker 1: But here's the thing that related. Oh no, spoiler alert.
Speaker 2: I should have seen it coming. I should have seen
Speaker 2: that coming.
Speaker 1: Related. You know, sometimes you look to the left because
Speaker 1: you're trying to take a right on red, which we
Speaker 1: get to do exclusively here in California. Other states suck it,
Speaker 1: but you do it for so long that the light
Speaker 1: turns green, but you're still looking. Do you ever have
Speaker 1: that happening?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you never know if someone's sleep at the wheel
Speaker 2: or I always look both ways, even as a passenger.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it is very considered of you to do that.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I'm here with my left arm ready to comment.
Speaker 1: Here, thank you.
Speaker 2: I will grab the wheel, the steering one.
Speaker 1: As I slump over.
Speaker 2: Yes, I'll take care of that first I'm worried about
Speaker 2: you after much like with an oxygen mask on an airplane,
Speaker 2: me first kill someone.
Speaker 1: Just let me merge and wave. This needs to be noted.
Speaker 1: It's happening a BMW. Let me merge. I'm definitely doing.
Speaker 1: That was really nice.
Speaker 2: Oh you did. Now they think you want to meet
Speaker 2: I do? That was too much. Your wave was like, hey,
Speaker 2: follow up, get into this car. We're going to a field.
Speaker 2: Don't worry about this guy is just my friend.
Speaker 1: Don't you want to go to an open field?
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, bring the hatchet, bring all your stuff.
Speaker 1: Come on, it's field time. What if this car doesn't
Speaker 1: let us, like, doesn't stop followios for the rest of
Speaker 1: the podcast. I asked for it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you told them it's field time, field.
Speaker 1: Time, sir. It was just so nice. I've I don't
Speaker 1: remember the last time I've tried to get over and
Speaker 1: the car that was in the next lane actually slowed
Speaker 1: down to give me a spot.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Usually they're behind you and you're just trying to be
Speaker 1: cautious and then they speed up.
Speaker 2: Right. Yeah, it's it's and I've gotten used to it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so much so when I go back to Montana and
Speaker 2: everyone's just it'll be like an uncontrolled four way intersection
Speaker 2: and it's for people just waving each other. No you
Speaker 2: go first, No, no, you were here for you go.
Speaker 2: They're for dinner, just kindly wasting everyone's time behind them.
Speaker 2: And those people aren't mad.
Speaker 1: No. But this, yeah, this, I think the part of
Speaker 1: the brilliance of us thinking of this podcast because we're
Speaker 1: doing it in the one of the worst I think
Speaker 1: this and maybe New Delhi some of the worst places
Speaker 1: to drive were just like this place is Mayhem.
Speaker 2: Do not even get me talking about the New Delhi traffic.
Speaker 1: I mean it's rough. They keep going in circles and
Speaker 1: you just have to kind of work your way out.
Speaker 2: Many fruit carts.
Speaker 1: So many vespa off brand in vespas.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I do appreciate I wave. I always acknowledge when
Speaker 2: someone lets me in. It's important. And you know it's
Speaker 2: important because you look for the wave when you let
Speaker 2: someone in. You want some acknowledgment. Yeah, sometimes we forget.
Speaker 1: But my oh, I stop paying attention to the directions.
Speaker 1: But my windows are tinted illegally dark. So I was
Speaker 1: afraid that man wouldn't see if I just waved like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's why I have a I have tinted
Speaker 2: windows also, so I have a flashlight and I just
Speaker 2: hold it behind my hand so they see the silhouette mark. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Sometimes I'll have fun and do a rabbit or a
Speaker 2: dog hand puppet so they're like, oh, a little dog said,
Speaker 2: thank you for letting me in. Uh huh. Sometimes my
Speaker 2: improv isn't on point, but it's quick.
Speaker 1: It is, and you're at least you're naming animals.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and and so you know if you're that's not
Speaker 2: my fault if you're not someone that visualizes someone in
Speaker 2: lieu of waving makes the a hand position. I'm doing
Speaker 2: just for Karen right here.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I'm also trying it.
Speaker 2: Assuming you can see it. Yeah. I will always do
Speaker 2: it when in a spotlight. I don't care where I'm performing.
Speaker 1: What are you doing a Doberman? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, and then you can manipulate it. I can
Speaker 2: do a pug, I can do I can do pretty
Speaker 2: much all the.
Speaker 1: Dogs real airdal Yeah might see it.
Speaker 2: My fingers can do it all. I need a spotlight
Speaker 2: and a dark room.
Speaker 1: Fixer didn't happen.
Speaker 2: It's daytime is the where I've had so many shadow
Speaker 2: puppet shows in the daytime outdoor shows where I don't
Speaker 2: talk about the venue with whoever's booking me, and I flop,
Speaker 2: like that time I did magic at a theater in
Speaker 2: the round. Oh, they could see all of my filament.
Speaker 1: What a terrible mistake.
Speaker 2: I I've always thought that would be funny if a
Speaker 2: magician had to do a theater in the round. And
Speaker 2: so there's people sitting on all of three sixty of
Speaker 2: them because you know they're they're hiding their moves man.
Speaker 1: Correct, Yeah, I get you, I got real. I actually
Speaker 1: got the entire.
Speaker 2: Thing you did. Okay, I thought I repeat it sometimes
Speaker 2: when you didn't wave to me.
Speaker 1: I didn't wave you on it for the reference. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. I was actually wondering how I've missed
Speaker 1: my turn like seven times in a row, Like, how
Speaker 1: was it this confusing?
Speaker 2: It just is, well some of these drive through we
Speaker 2: are going to a very exciting new dunkin Donuts drive through,
Speaker 2: and we've decided before recording that we will not eat
Speaker 2: into the mics.
Speaker 1: You know, we didn't actually talk about it. So basically
Speaker 1: that's Chris telling me to stop eating into the mic.
Speaker 1: I think is which just happened?
Speaker 2: No, no, I've i've I've dropped crumbs, I've eaten into
Speaker 2: the mic multiple times.
Speaker 1: In other area codes. That's what I wanted you to
Speaker 1: say at the end. What can I tell you A slight,
Speaker 1: very short and maybe not that interesting anecdote.
Speaker 2: I love it because my my hopes are low, so
Speaker 2: I'm only going to be pleased by it. Okat that
Speaker 2: and she just did you see that look on her face?
Speaker 2: Like like a Daria with an attitude?
Speaker 1: She dissass me.
Speaker 2: She really did look like Daria.
Speaker 1: Literally, it was Daria driving at us on the wrong
Speaker 1: side of the road, like fully in my lane, and.
Speaker 2: As she went by, she went, Nana, Nana, that's the
Speaker 2: Daria song. If anyone boy drop me off at this church.
Speaker 1: My anecdote is that I was at a place today
Speaker 1: getting my hair done, and I got into the elevator
Speaker 1: to go back down to my car and a guy
Speaker 1: was walking toward at I knew it was gonna happen
Speaker 1: as the doors were closing a guy. I looked up
Speaker 1: and there was a guy three feet away, and so
Speaker 1: I went, oh and I and I heard him go
Speaker 1: that's okay, And then I tried to put my foot
Speaker 1: between the closing doors. I like threw my foot out
Speaker 1: this this anecdote was a mistake. I can feel it.
Speaker 2: That's okay. What I do at this point is say,
Speaker 2: which tripped him?
Speaker 1: Lie?
Speaker 2: Yeah, just lie.
Speaker 1: I almost flicked here, I'll embellish. I almost flicked my
Speaker 1: flip flop off trying to stick my foot in this
Speaker 1: closing elevator door. I thought it would just immediately go
Speaker 1: back out because it would register my foot.
Speaker 2: You put your bare foot essentially in a closing elevator door.
Speaker 2: That's dangerous.
Speaker 1: Uh true? But I love this man.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 1: I basically flicked my foot out and then it just
Speaker 1: didn't close, and I just pulled my foot back like sorry,
Speaker 1: like I did my best. Oh, but I kind of
Speaker 1: didn't do much.
Speaker 2: Do you think he recognized that you really did your
Speaker 2: very last I feel like.
Speaker 1: Because he said that's okay. Before my foot flicked out,
Speaker 1: it was like my brain told me to flick my
Speaker 1: foot out, and while my brain was talking to me,
Speaker 1: he said, don't even bother, don't bother, And I was like,
Speaker 1: it's too late. The electric signal has already gone down
Speaker 1: to the foot.
Speaker 2: Wait. Was this guy maybe a certified hunk?
Speaker 1: I couldn't see I did my glasses on. It really
Speaker 1: wasn't about that. I mean I think he was because
Speaker 1: I get my hair done where there's also a gym.
Speaker 1: So there are lots of men and especially gay men,
Speaker 1: who are getting it taken care of at the gym,
Speaker 1: ripped to the gills, just like they're the ones that
Speaker 1: have the muscles under their armpits, like swimmers get striations.
Speaker 1: Is that what they're called?
Speaker 2: Yeah, latstriations, lats. I had them as a kid. They're
Speaker 2: pretty nice for one summer.
Speaker 1: Maybe you should get just lats back.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I used to be tore up from the floor off,
Speaker 2: but then I discovered late night cheese pleasers.
Speaker 1: Hold on, we have to put in our order at don't.
Speaker 2: You tell me? Yeah, I don't know what happened to me. Hi,
Speaker 2: I'll have a s'mores anything.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, we need a second. Sorry, weird? Thank you?
Speaker 2: We're podcasting.
Speaker 1: Oh look at the choices. This is Nutso do you
Speaker 1: guys know what you want?
Speaker 2: I'll have an iced coffee and a blueberry muffin. Coffee cake,
Speaker 2: blueberry muffin.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's an iced coffee. Do you want medium?
Speaker 4: Long?
Speaker 2: Medium?
Speaker 1: A medium's great?
Speaker 2: Uh? Maybe a pump of vanilla, A little.
Speaker 1: Vanilla, yes, please? And then also a blueberry muffin? Onalis,
Speaker 1: Can I get a mango pineapple refreshing? Yeah? What size
Speaker 1: would you like?
Speaker 2: Media? Okay? And can?
Speaker 1: Then? Can I get two medium mango pineapple refreshers? What
Speaker 1: do you think I'm gonna do? Lemonade? Both lemonade? Please?
Speaker 1: And then oh you have to get do you want
Speaker 1: a donut on aalise?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: You might as well. Chris is getting a muffin. I
Speaker 1: mean maybe the I've heard I've heard things about the munchkins.
Speaker 1: Let's get some munchkins when so? Can we get the
Speaker 1: ten munchkin order? Thank you?
Speaker 2: Your hair looks like it's from a commercial about hair.
Speaker 1: Thank you.
Speaker 2: It is moving on its own accord, almost in a
Speaker 2: way where I was shocked at first, because your head
Speaker 2: wasn't moving, and it's kind of undulating like a length
Speaker 2: of silk flapping in the breeze. And they did a
Speaker 2: great job with your roots. I'm being I'm not trying
Speaker 2: to sell anyone out down by the river with the roots.
Speaker 2: But it's the coloring. You don't know you've had good
Speaker 2: coloring until it's had me see it. Knowing nothing about hair,
Speaker 2: coloring and it looks.
Speaker 1: Great, and saying, check out that hair color.
Speaker 2: Yeah, just looked like I didn't say, did you get
Speaker 2: your hair done? I believe I said did you get
Speaker 2: new hair? It looked like you got a transplant. I'm like,
Speaker 2: did you go to Bosley Institute? I almost said, but
Speaker 2: it looks great.
Speaker 1: I'm not just the president, I'm also a member.
Speaker 2: Yes, the classic hair clfes for men reference. Yes, it's
Speaker 2: I'm not bragging. I will you know, I'll insult myself
Speaker 2: in many ways and I try not to. But I'm
Speaker 2: not going bald.
Speaker 1: Not anytime soon.
Speaker 2: No, I'm like a cheat. I'm like a chia. I'm
Speaker 2: like a chinchilla. Yeah, or chia? Is that the plant
Speaker 2: that it grows out of a pot? Yeah? Why did
Speaker 2: I forget? Why did I think all it was a
Speaker 2: burrowing animal all of a.
Speaker 1: Sudden, Well, a chinchilla is. And they sound similar? Is
Speaker 1: that the confusion?
Speaker 2: Yes it is, but both have the kind of head
Speaker 2: of hair I'm wanting and having.
Speaker 1: It is what I think we're agreeing exactly.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I'm taking a little time to brag about myself.
Speaker 1: Good because I'm sure it made you feel bad to
Speaker 1: really compliment me about my.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there was an imbalance in the car.
Speaker 1: You had to get in there and say, hey, wait
Speaker 1: a second.
Speaker 2: You can smell it. You can almost smell the thick imbalance.
Speaker 1: But I got to believe it was like some sort
Speaker 1: of keratin treatment. So not only did I get my
Speaker 1: roots done in a little trim, but he also did
Speaker 1: a real nice conditioning thing, which I think is what
Speaker 1: you're seeing in the piece is flowing like self.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, it's very shiny, but not in an oily way,
Speaker 2: thank you, in a dry, almost light refractive type way.
Speaker 1: Great. Yeah, I'm loving.
Speaker 2: Yeah, very very silky, very very good, very good.
Speaker 1: Thanks Chris.
Speaker 2: There was a time I guess where I had. We're
Speaker 2: just waiting in line. Yeah, the real conversation starts when
Speaker 2: the wheels are rolling.
Speaker 1: That's right, We're almost we're almost conversationally in a dead
Speaker 1: zone when we are stopped, right, because it just gives
Speaker 1: us too much time to be to think about.
Speaker 2: It, right exactly. But I had a bald spot in
Speaker 2: the center top of my head the size of a
Speaker 2: silver dollar from what I didn't even know was there.
Speaker 2: My friend, my roommate was like, that's been there the
Speaker 2: whole time I've known you, A perfect bald spot center
Speaker 2: top center zero, just shiny scalp. And I went to
Speaker 2: a dermatologist and he said, oh, that's alopecia. Ooh, I'll
Speaker 2: give you a shot. A steroid. A needle went in there.
Speaker 2: All the hair grew back white. So I had a
Speaker 2: first host of talk soup white tuft like a skunk thing.
Speaker 1: I wish I could reference that name right now.
Speaker 2: Yeah, man John something. No, no, that's a comic, a
Speaker 2: road dog. But this white hair grew at a faster
Speaker 2: rate than my normal hair, so it actually was longer.
Speaker 2: It was insane, and over time it went back to
Speaker 2: its normal color. And that was and that was ten
Speaker 2: years ago, and it hasn't. I'm back, so thank god.
Speaker 2: I don't know why Will Smith hit Chris Rock that
Speaker 2: you know, just give it. I don't. I didn't, Oh god,
Speaker 2: thank you. Threw it at me like I'm a busker.
Speaker 2: I gave Karen three dollars and she took two of
Speaker 2: them and threw the other one like I was a
Speaker 2: guy guy playing guitar at the beach. She balled it
Speaker 2: up and threw it at my face.
Speaker 1: Thank you. I'm so excited about the munchon. Okay, great,
Speaker 1: can you take that?
Speaker 2: Oh yes, wow, that's a lot of liquid.
Speaker 1: Also, those are mediums, I mean, fucking Nutso what is
Speaker 1: the large?
Speaker 2: Just one of those helmets with two straws coming out
Speaker 2: of it. Are these identical beverages?
Speaker 1: They are?
Speaker 2: Oh sorry turtles. Oh that's the worst sound ever.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was like styrofoam, a styrofoam sound.
Speaker 2: Okay, before we get out on the road, I want
Speaker 2: to show you that the only video I've had go viral.
Speaker 2: It's earned me over seven dollars already. What in the
Speaker 2: It's a skateboarding video and I just approve. Yes, thanks
Speaker 2: see that, Chris?
Speaker 1: Will you put that on our socials?
Speaker 2: Sure?
Speaker 1: Come on.
Speaker 2: See I've been skating and I wanted to show you
Speaker 2: that one because I actually left the ground.
Speaker 1: What was that move called.
Speaker 2: It's called a no comply, but I hit it off
Speaker 2: the curb. Yeah, so it's a curb no comply.
Speaker 1: And now our curb no comply is rare.
Speaker 2: They've made a comeback. But secretly I've been doing them
Speaker 2: since the nineties. So it's one of those tricks that
Speaker 2: I have in the bag. Yes, and so when I
Speaker 2: pull it out, a lot of young kids think, oh,
Speaker 2: you're doing a current trick, and I'm like that tricks
Speaker 2: from the late eighties.
Speaker 1: Now, would you say, of all the tricks you can
Speaker 1: do at this moment in your skating career, is that
Speaker 1: the craziest.
Speaker 2: No, it's one of the easiest. For Oh, it's just
Speaker 2: a matter of committing to landing on it.
Speaker 1: Why would that go viral then, because for other people
Speaker 1: it's not as easy.
Speaker 2: That's what I My self esteem went through the roof
Speaker 2: because all these pro skater friends were like, I'm gonna
Speaker 2: need some pointers on that one, Like no, yeah, really,
Speaker 2: my ego that and the fact I've never bald or
Speaker 2: had balded or had a cavity. You know, I just
Speaker 2: felt like a superhero for a day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, per day.
Speaker 2: And again I've made upward close to eight dollars.
Speaker 1: I mean, that's got to feel incredible.
Speaker 2: I've gone viral. It is the video I've done of
Speaker 2: all the comedy twenty five years of stand up under
Speaker 2: my belt, my little skate videos got more views from strangers.
Speaker 2: I got a little notification confetti You're part of the club.
Speaker 2: I mean imagine I'll get a plaque? Are you?
Speaker 1: Is that Instagram or TikTok. It's just Instagram. Let's get
Speaker 1: more of those going for you. Thanks how I mean, no,
Speaker 1: this is a plan, let's do it.
Speaker 2: I just switched my little account. I didn't know you
Speaker 2: can monetize. It's a button. So that's just my first
Speaker 2: Who knows how I'd probably be a homeowner.
Speaker 1: Congrats, Well, thank you, you're going to get there.
Speaker 2: But the comments on there were like childhood heroes, even
Speaker 2: an emoji of flame or something. I was nerding out
Speaker 2: my little no comply over them. There's a famous there's
Speaker 2: a larger planter at Costco, the only place I skate
Speaker 2: that is like twelve feet long, and some kid hit
Speaker 2: his board on that and no copply it over that
Speaker 2: whole thing and that was like a featured trick of
Speaker 2: the month or whatever on all the so so I
Speaker 2: think it reminds people of that one. Yeah, it was
Speaker 2: just good timing. That's how you got to be with
Speaker 2: his social media stuff. See what's trending.
Speaker 1: Get in there, say I can do this too.
Speaker 2: Plant or curb no complies are huge this month.
Speaker 1: I was saying that. I was just saying that earlier,
Speaker 1: and you never know, next month it might just get
Speaker 1: me canceled. It's like you can't talk about no complies anymore.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Sorry.
Speaker 1: What was the name that you saw that really got
Speaker 1: your heart racing? When they somebody that you're saying childhood hero?
Speaker 1: Can you name them?
Speaker 2: It's funny because some of them are friends that i'd
Speaker 2: like feel like a dork. It's so funny. You could
Speaker 2: put me in a room with John Ham And I
Speaker 2: don't know why. I always think of John Gosling Gillen
Speaker 2: Hall movie. I can't think of famoue famous people, but
Speaker 2: the skateboarders that I grew up with their picture on
Speaker 2: my wall, Yes, who are yeah? One? You know there's
Speaker 2: a guy named Barker Barrett that he's one guy that
Speaker 2: likes comedy and we just have organically corresponded on social media.
Speaker 2: I didn't know what it was. I did not because
Speaker 2: his handle isn't his name. I thought it was just
Speaker 2: a nice guy that also likes to skate curbs. But
Speaker 2: he's one of my my favorite skaters.
Speaker 1: It was a secret hidden skateboard star.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, and he was like wow, and that just
Speaker 2: that wow, as you know, because we're both he's in
Speaker 2: his fifties and you know, yeah, we're all just holding
Speaker 2: on for the little pleasures. And so yeah, that's that's
Speaker 2: the name I'll drop. If you want me to drop
Speaker 2: a name, I do. Yeah, Barker Barrett. I like if
Speaker 2: he's a good job. Here's what I have to say
Speaker 2: to Barker Barrett.
Speaker 1: Good job to you, Good job to you being an
Speaker 1: industry pioneer.
Speaker 2: Yeah right, yeah, Barker Barrett. We all loved your video
Speaker 2: now and later back when you skated for the the
Speaker 2: old company Planet Earth Planets Skateboards.
Speaker 1: Thank you, you know, yeah, yeah, we all feel this way.
Speaker 2: Karen's always talking about Brian lott Brian Lockey Lottie. Brian
Speaker 2: Lottie is a is a skateboarder. I grew up very
Speaker 2: much enjoying his tricks and his style. And then one
Speaker 2: day he did all the artwork in the Apple stores.
Speaker 2: He's a painter now, oh shit, and he got a
Speaker 2: huge account. I was like, oh, I got to tell
Speaker 2: him congratulations. But I've never met him, don't have access
Speaker 2: to him, but in my mind he's been in my
Speaker 2: life for thirty plus years. But so anyway, if you're listening,
Speaker 2: Brian Lottie, Karen and I both big fans, Brian, we
Speaker 2: like your paintings.
Speaker 1: I like you before you were in the Apple store.
Speaker 2: Yep, yep, I'm not saying yeah, I liked I liked
Speaker 2: you when you were poor.
Speaker 1: I liked you, or before you were sellout.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: No, how much time we spent talking about selling out
Speaker 1: in the nineties and how sad that is in twenty
Speaker 1: twenty four.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and everyone that was talking that way is realizing
Speaker 2: it was a poor way to look at life.
Speaker 1: Well it literally, Yeah, you really have to do quality
Speaker 1: and in the experience.
Speaker 2: You really have to be on the hunt for that
Speaker 2: perfect sellout. Yeah, and I'm trying.
Speaker 1: I'm trying, I mean hold out a little further.
Speaker 2: Yes, Yeah, I don't think skateboarding is going to be
Speaker 2: my future, but it did make me feel good.
Speaker 1: Have you ever seen two orange on top?
Speaker 2: They are, yeah, a blinking yellow which we you and
Speaker 2: I know as proceeded with caution yield. But someone climbed
Speaker 2: up on there like it was monkey bars and hung
Speaker 2: two caution flags from the post.
Speaker 1: Which I think is gilding the lily. I'm already looking
Speaker 1: at a blinking yellow official stoplight. You don't need to
Speaker 1: tell me to be careful as I look at it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you might as well tie a couple of basketball
Speaker 2: shoes together and fling them over the pole.
Speaker 1: Is it a BMX Star, No, that's just a child.
Speaker 1: Damn it. Crying, Lottie, are you here?
Speaker 2: That actually the two wheel mechanism that kid was on.
Speaker 2: It's an e bike, but they are like street legal,
Speaker 2: and that child, I think you and I both know,
Speaker 2: doesn't have a driver's license. He was not of a
Speaker 2: driving age. He was, but he was on a e
Speaker 2: bike that probably goes forty five miles an hour, has
Speaker 2: dirt bike tires on a suspension.
Speaker 1: I have seen these bikes and I've seen children on
Speaker 1: them with no helmet driving in traffic in Los Angeles.
Speaker 2: And as someone that doesn't wear a helmet while skateboarding,
Speaker 2: although it did today, I was skating a bull and
Speaker 2: I didn't want to hit my head, so I've got
Speaker 2: a helmet and i got kneepads. But on a motorcycle,
Speaker 2: it is not when it's a matter of time when
Speaker 2: you collide with a car. And I'm sorry motorcyclists out there.
Speaker 2: We got a lot of hog riders that listen to
Speaker 2: this program.
Speaker 1: They know that that's part of the danger.
Speaker 2: They're all about Yeah, that you think you got to
Speaker 2: be open to it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you better be.
Speaker 2: It's not if it's when you're courting danger. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: that kid shouldn't be on that powerful of a silent killer.
Speaker 2: All the electronic bikes, you can't hear them coming in
Speaker 2: my Neighborhoodally, there are these little motorcycles that like people
Speaker 2: buy kids and it has the loudest like you know,
Speaker 2: lawnmower motor on it, like it's with tiny wheels. That's
Speaker 2: a whole different thing that's so loud that it's like,
Speaker 2: we get it. You don't want anyone to hit you.
Speaker 2: Maybe that's what the whole Harley Davidson thing is that's
Speaker 2: always bothered me. They're so loud, they set off car alarms.
Speaker 2: It's ear pollution, it's a nuisance. But maybe it's a
Speaker 2: safety thing, because when you're on the freeway and you
Speaker 2: hear a Harley like so loud coming up behind you,
Speaker 2: you'd like veer out of the way and make room
Speaker 2: for them. Yeah, I'm just now out loud realizing that
Speaker 2: they're just concerned for their own safety.
Speaker 1: I mean, perhaps, but there are people who do that
Speaker 1: to their cars for right, for bizarre you will you
Speaker 1: will acknowledge me reasons that I'm like, okay, except for
Speaker 1: can't it be turned down like eleven decibels? Right, so
Speaker 1: that we're not all just suffering for the eight seconds
Speaker 1: you pass through our life.
Speaker 2: No, sorry, born with a little will. Sorry.
Speaker 1: Man, When you say it like that, it all makes sense.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Just can you please turn your engine down? And
Speaker 2: they just flash you a baby picture? Oh my apologies. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it can be as loud as you want. That was
Speaker 2: an anomaly of nature.
Speaker 1: Do your thing.
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't know if that's the reason.
Speaker 1: I mean, everyone has their.
Speaker 2: Reasons, yes, yes, yeah, yeah, someone they want to be tough.
Speaker 2: It's like some people get like me. I got a
Speaker 2: tattoo because I thought people would stop messing with me.
Speaker 1: But it's what was the tattoo of?
Speaker 2: Well, it's under my shirt and it's my mother's name, incursive.
Speaker 2: But in certain circles that'll get me. Uh, you know,
Speaker 2: someone's meal out on the yard. Oh if I ever
Speaker 2: get locked.
Speaker 1: Up, is that something you're planning on doing or no?
Speaker 2: No, I'm not going to jail. Okay, great, yeah, pay
Speaker 2: my taxes. Never never done it, I'm honest.
Speaker 1: Well, but you are skating. No, complies over planters in
Speaker 1: Costco without permission.
Speaker 2: Yes, someone could just out of nowhere a pedestrian. I
Speaker 2: didn't see them. My board flies hits them in the temple.
Speaker 2: I'm locked up inslitary manslaughter.
Speaker 1: It's over.
Speaker 2: That's when I get my father's name on the other chest.
Speaker 1: And people start they're like hey on, people on the
Speaker 1: cell blocker like no, please don't and you're like, look,
Speaker 1: I'll let it go this time.
Speaker 2: Just give that guy your commissary. He loved his parents.
Speaker 2: Coming up on the left and in front of a
Speaker 2: seventy thousand dollars house, we have a raccoon ready. Cyber
Speaker 2: truck trucks still my favorite news item. It's not the best,
Speaker 2: and we have so many news items these days.
Speaker 1: Oh, there's so much news items to pick from.
Speaker 2: It it's just I've tried to write jokes about it,
Speaker 2: but it's it's ends up being because the drivers are
Speaker 2: garbage or whatever. You know, there's not a good joke
Speaker 2: that you're going to make. And that one, by the way,
Speaker 2: was just off that I was just riffing there. Clearly
Speaker 2: I didn't actually say that to an audience. Good, but
Speaker 2: they really do. It has to be I think They
Speaker 2: especially look like European dumpsters, like not the blue ones
Speaker 2: we know around here. So I don't know if these
Speaker 2: raccoons are coming over from the UK, but I've seen
Speaker 2: the dumpsters posted next to a cyber truck that are identity.
Speaker 2: Like the angle is the same. It's like an a
Speaker 2: frame that's longer on one side than the other. And so,
Speaker 2: you know, it just makes you realize how much these
Speaker 2: raccoons are traveling.
Speaker 1: I mean they do. I bet they get on luxury
Speaker 1: liners to come over to America.
Speaker 2: The way rats used to on the like the Titanic.
Speaker 1: Yes, if they truly care about their passion, which is garbage,
Speaker 1: they will make the trip to stick their hands all
Speaker 1: over a cyber truck. Yeah, try to get their snacks.
Speaker 2: Yeah, then no one ever stops them, like the boat
Speaker 2: security is like nap, that's just a cat with a
Speaker 2: robbers mask on. Nah, that's the thing about raccoon, don't lie.
Speaker 2: They always have a Zoro mask.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. You know there's a new TV series
Speaker 1: called Zoro. It's a Spanish speaking cast. We ended up
Speaker 1: watching it the other night, my friend Zach and Zach
Speaker 1: Nory Towers you know him.
Speaker 2: Yes, I just did a show with Zach and we
Speaker 2: had a great time. Very much like.
Speaker 1: Zach, he's the greatest, super funny. Where did you do
Speaker 1: that show?
Speaker 2: It was in Santa Monica at the West Side Comedy Theater.
Speaker 2: Oh fun and Zach and I both had really fun
Speaker 2: sets good and yeah, we had a good time talking.
Speaker 2: I feel very comfortable. There's certain people where I don't
Speaker 2: know Zack that well, but once we start talking, I'm like, oh,
Speaker 2: I've known.
Speaker 1: You forever completely.
Speaker 2: There's just a handful like that.
Speaker 1: He's the person that I met him through my friend Jacob,
Speaker 1: who was who was friends with him. Jacob's from Canada,
Speaker 1: came to visit me. He's like, do you mind if
Speaker 1: our friend, my friend Zach comes and hangs out and
Speaker 1: now me and Zach are friends. Like it was like immediately,
Speaker 1: I'm like, yes, you will be sticking around, right, you
Speaker 1: will continue to be a part of this. So oftentimes
Speaker 1: we do like a movie and I just watch like
Speaker 1: a horror movie or something stupid and eat dinner together.
Speaker 1: And but lately we're like he sees everything in the theater.
Speaker 1: I don't see anything. So I don't want to like
Speaker 1: make him rewatch stuff.
Speaker 2: Oh that's funny because out of nowhere, he was like,
Speaker 2: do you have an AMC pass right or do you
Speaker 2: do the monthly Alamo thing? Like several different options to watch. Yep,
Speaker 2: all the movies you want for and it is a
Speaker 2: good deal. I need to do that. Yeah, yeah, that's
Speaker 2: movie buff.
Speaker 1: He's a big movie buff. So we just couldn't pick anything.
Speaker 1: And then I'm like, well, let's just see what Zero's about.
Speaker 1: And we ended up watching like two episodes of it.
Speaker 1: It was really good and like it was, it was
Speaker 1: really interesting and I don't know, that's the thing I
Speaker 1: do love about streaming. I love watching other countries' TV
Speaker 1: and like comparing it to our TV and kind of like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is how they do that or this is I
Speaker 1: don't know. I think it's super fascinating.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's gotten to the point where I will
Speaker 2: watch pretty much anything French.
Speaker 4: Oh really, I just because of that one show that
Speaker 4: you yeah It's Mary Anne, Yeah, which everyone I always
Speaker 4: tell people watch it and they end up watching the
Speaker 4: default English dubbed version, which is, of course it's don't ever.
Speaker 2: Watch a dub thing. I yeah, you get used to
Speaker 2: the reading of it and it's I think you enjoy
Speaker 2: it more reading it because the narration is so poetic.
Speaker 2: But anyway, that just the way the actor, the actors
Speaker 2: are so good and that and anything that I've watched
Speaker 2: that's French that makes it onto Netflix. Yeah, be it
Speaker 2: like a crime heist thing. Any did you see that one?
Speaker 1: I think it's Loupon and it's yeah, I loved it.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, And there's a something I don't know if
Speaker 2: it's French New wave or what. What the trend with
Speaker 2: French the lighting, just the way that things are lit.
Speaker 2: I'd say French new wave because of you know the
Speaker 2: guy that did Mon Uncle. I don't know. Is this
Speaker 2: getting to ja Yes? Yes, yes, you know Jaquet? Is
Speaker 2: that his name? Yess? That's that French new wave. What's
Speaker 2: the movie that where it's a bisected house and it
Speaker 2: was silent?
Speaker 1: I believe it's playtime?
Speaker 2: It is playtime? Yeah?
Speaker 1: What do we both French heads? Well, here's the thing,
Speaker 1: French films. When my dad's in town. We've talked about this.
Speaker 1: When my dad's in town, I have to pick movies
Speaker 1: that he won't start complaining about because he's very picky.
Speaker 1: He loves to say this is phony. Halfway through? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm like, what do you Sorry, it's a movie, but yeah.
Speaker 1: So he always talks about Jacques Tati because he finds
Speaker 1: it so creative and delightful. So when he was visiting
Speaker 1: last time, we watched one of those movies and I
Speaker 1: won't be able to remember now, but it was the
Speaker 1: one where it starts in the airport and it basically
Speaker 1: follows these American tourists coming into France, going into the city,
Speaker 1: going out to dinner, going to a club, all this stuff,
Speaker 1: but there's no dialogue, right, that's.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's playtime was like that. Yeah, and does it
Speaker 2: have those long shots with no edit, like fifteen minute
Speaker 2: yes shots.
Speaker 1: So you are basically and I don't know if that's
Speaker 1: considered verte, because it's like you're just sitting there, like
Speaker 1: you're on the street and the thing's happening on the camera.
Speaker 1: It's like that's how it would have happened in real life. Right,
Speaker 1: I'm not sure if that's what that is, but it
Speaker 1: like those movies. The one we watched, I wish I
Speaker 1: can remember the name of it. There were so many
Speaker 1: I started realizing they were hidden like Easter eggs. So
Speaker 1: when the tourists were at this club. It was called
Speaker 1: like the Crown Club, and so you're watching it and
Speaker 1: there's really funny physical comedy, like all the waiters were
Speaker 1: doing different stuff and dropping.
Speaker 2: Stuff because there's no dialogue. It's there's some Charlie Chaplin.
Speaker 1: Now it's all yeah, it's a bunch of visual stuff.
Speaker 1: But then what I realized is because it's a brand
Speaker 1: new club, so as they're going through the night, things
Speaker 1: are falling apart because like they just opened. And then
Speaker 1: I realized, I go, wait a second, all the women
Speaker 1: because of course they're wearing like sixties cocktail dresses. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they all have weird I was like, that lady has
Speaker 1: a weird scar on her back. Well, slowly but surely,
Speaker 1: you realize the chairs they're sitting in are like steel
Speaker 1: back chairs with a crown design, like a crown shape,
Speaker 1: and the paint from the chairs is getting on the women,
Speaker 1: but they but you.
Speaker 2: Just like it's just subtle, very subtle.
Speaker 1: But slowly you realize everyone gets up to dance, and
Speaker 1: as they're dancing around, you're like, why, what's on her?
Speaker 1: And then you're like, that's from the chair. And it's
Speaker 1: like so all these ways that are built in of
Speaker 1: how this night is terrible and actually like going really badly,
Speaker 1: but nobody's noticing. Yeah, and you're noticing because you're just
Speaker 1: sitting there kind of, it's so brilliant.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and other movies like these damn American films, well
Speaker 2: shove it and they'll have someone saying, oh my god,
Speaker 2: there's a crown on your back. It's from the chairs, yes, right,
Speaker 2: Like why give the audience some credit?
Speaker 1: Give them like let them have the fun of discovery.
Speaker 1: But here's the thing that's that I realized as we
Speaker 1: were watching that because it was so delightful and we
Speaker 1: like the entire time, we were all having the best
Speaker 1: time watching it. And then I was like, this is
Speaker 1: art because this is the filmmaker saying they're gonna love this,
Speaker 1: and they're gonna love this, like putting in these things,
Speaker 1: giving the audience the benefit of the doubt. Then like
Speaker 1: coming up with these amazing The waiters doing this shit
Speaker 1: were like the waiters passing a bottle of wine. This
Speaker 1: one waiter was drinking wine. Then the headwaiter notices that
Speaker 1: the waiters are drinking, so he puts like a burnt cork,
Speaker 1: he rubs it on the top of a wine bottle.
Speaker 1: And so then there's one waiter walking around with just
Speaker 1: this little black circle of like lipstick on his mouth
Speaker 1: because he's the one drinking it. Oh, that's great, Like
Speaker 1: things like that that are so subtle and simple but hilarious.
Speaker 2: It's funny because I haven't seen this movie and I
Speaker 2: can't stop thinking of it being Buster Katon or Charlie Chafflin,
Speaker 2: right like that. That's silent film.
Speaker 1: That's it is. It's kind of like an elevated version
Speaker 1: of a silent film. Did you see that? Did you
Speaker 1: see what that woman and I just that experienced she
Speaker 1: and I just had?
Speaker 2: Was there no wave? Are we back to? What part
Speaker 2: of town are we in?
Speaker 4: That?
Speaker 2: She? No? No, No.
Speaker 1: What she did is she looked over with a look
Speaker 1: of pure panic on our face, and just from that
Speaker 1: I interpreted and waved for over and she just did it.
Speaker 1: That's what women can do if we elect Vice President
Speaker 1: gomalayrus that, that's what we can start getting done in
Speaker 1: this country.
Speaker 2: Just does Kamala have to have a look of panic
Speaker 2: on her face to get things done?
Speaker 1: No, she never will.
Speaker 2: Oh, we look at her with a panic.
Speaker 1: And it will be I am already locked into your
Speaker 1: concern and I will make the room for you.
Speaker 2: Whoever is in charge of the Instagram or you know
Speaker 2: their social media, and they are killing it. There are
Speaker 2: so many funny the thing where it show's drump like
Speaker 2: they say, uh, she's done this and this and I'm
Speaker 2: a convicted Fela and it just cuts it off and
Speaker 2: she says, I'm Kamala Harris. I approve this message. That's
Speaker 2: the brilliant. I watched it over and over. It's like,
Speaker 2: this is one of my favorite comedy videos. There's just
Speaker 2: so much energy right now that feels good. We'll also
Speaker 2: needed it.
Speaker 1: So badly that feels too. Like somebody somewhere said, hey,
Speaker 1: we've been like this. The age range needs to change
Speaker 1: of people who have their hands on the button. Like
Speaker 1: it can't just be some fifty year old that's kind
Speaker 1: of managing down and telling people we have to be
Speaker 1: careful of this, and we have to be careful of that.
Speaker 1: It's like they've basically gotten together and gone. We have
Speaker 1: to start doing our own messaging proactively, and we have
Speaker 1: to do it to the people that we want to
Speaker 1: be speaking to. And the difference between it and what's
Speaker 1: come before is so incredibly important and valid where It's
Speaker 1: like these people who are doing that work should be
Speaker 1: in charge in a lot of other places and be
Speaker 1: given the wheel.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very exciting.
Speaker 1: Let the youngsters up in front. They know what they're doing.
Speaker 2: Like my dad says, everything will be fine once old
Speaker 2: guys like me are dead, and I'm like, please, Dad,
Speaker 2: don't say that. Also kind of true, he knows, he
Speaker 2: knows he golfs with him. But yeah, no offense to
Speaker 2: any of your dads. We love our dads enough to
Speaker 2: get a tattoo of them. My point is, you know
Speaker 2: my point.
Speaker 1: What is your point?
Speaker 2: My point is, no comply. Young people are great over
Speaker 2: a curb.
Speaker 1: I'm the kind of person that learns one skateboard term
Speaker 1: and I'm going to fucking use it in every possible way.
Speaker 2: I can that that one mentioning that would get you
Speaker 2: a lot of street cred.
Speaker 1: Great, That's what I'm looking for. Unearned street cred.
Speaker 2: Is what I'm all about, because it's a trick that's
Speaker 2: been around the block for a while. And if you said, oh,
Speaker 2: I used to be able to no comply, someone will
Speaker 2: believe you. So I want to say, early tricks, I used.
Speaker 1: To be able to no comply. I wouldn't say I
Speaker 1: used to be able to do a no comply. You
Speaker 1: want to get in this middle lane, sir.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because a no comply that means, oh, you can
Speaker 2: just do one on the flat ground. If you just
Speaker 2: say I used to be able to no comply anything,
Speaker 2: then it's like, oh, I can only imagine all the
Speaker 2: different ways this person could no comply.
Speaker 1: And then I would have to move away quickly because they.
Speaker 2: There will be follow up questions, Yeah, yeah, you got it.
Speaker 2: Run you gotta say it and run? What's that?
Speaker 1: I used to use an old one. My skateboarding term
Speaker 1: that I love to throw around was the mick.
Speaker 2: The mc twist.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, is there another mick.
Speaker 2: The Mike McGill invented the mctwist, which is an inverted five.
Speaker 2: But that's less believable because you have to have a
Speaker 2: vert ramp. It's it's I do specific type of scape
Speaker 2: I built want In Quarantine, I'm just saying the backstory.
Speaker 2: That's even more questions that are going to be asked.
Speaker 2: It has to be something you can do on the
Speaker 2: streets as a kid, no matter where you're from, and alie,
Speaker 2: oh sure, okay, but everyone's gonna say allie. Yeah, you
Speaker 2: know that's like a go to. This is as classic
Speaker 2: a move, but a little more sate, a little more
Speaker 2: like okay, okay, okay, yeah, no comply, okay, no complies. Yeah,
Speaker 2: they're not for everybody, but they got respect.
Speaker 1: What are what's the term you would use if you
Speaker 1: were trying a little bit to seem impressive. Oh, that
Speaker 1: doesn't involvet ramps, are dropping into a bowl or any
Speaker 1: of those things that we don't want to get involved
Speaker 1: in right now, right.
Speaker 2: What if I'm in a game of skate, which is
Speaker 2: like playing basketball horse, but it's skate tricks. So someone
Speaker 2: does a skate trick and you have to mimic that trick, okay,
Speaker 2: and if you don't do it, you get a letter.
Speaker 1: Great.
Speaker 2: Do you understand the rules game? Yep. In a game
Speaker 2: of skate which a lot of men my age appropriate
Speaker 2: friend group will play a game of skate, I will
Speaker 2: always get them with my g nolly heel flips. Nollie, Yes,
Speaker 2: it's off the nose and I flip it with my
Speaker 2: back foot heel flip that. It's a trick that's easy
Speaker 2: for me, but not everyone learned it.
Speaker 1: So you're good at the tricks. Basically, you chose to practice.
Speaker 2: Yes, got it. And it's funny because I learned that
Speaker 2: one because all my friends could do gnully toe flips.
Speaker 2: And we're a group, so it's like, hey, I'll take
Speaker 2: care of this trick. It's weird. But the friend we
Speaker 2: weren't competing. We were a group of friends, so I
Speaker 2: learned a lot of tricks that they didn't bother learning. Yeah,
Speaker 2: isn't that funny. That's if we're going to go on
Speaker 2: tour as a group and do a demo. We got
Speaker 2: all between the five of us, we're going to entertain
Speaker 2: everyone in this mall. I used to get so excited.
Speaker 1: Where's the variety?
Speaker 2: The children ask, yes, that's where this guy comes in.
Speaker 2: And then he burst through a flaming rula hoop like
Speaker 2: a Collie Jake player and does his uh it's you
Speaker 2: don't mention the toe with a regular no life flip.
Speaker 2: You don't know it's a kick flip, but it's off
Speaker 2: the nose.
Speaker 1: The nose is the front it is. That's a good question, and.
Speaker 2: That's the tail.
Speaker 1: The tail.
Speaker 2: The heel is the back part of my foot. What
Speaker 2: what we all know to be a heel? So you
Speaker 2: do what looks like, hey, this is going to be
Speaker 2: an allie, And then suddenly you extend that front foot
Speaker 2: and you flick it with your heel and it flip.
Speaker 1: Oh, it flips under you. You come down with the
Speaker 1: in the good faith that it's going to be right
Speaker 1: side up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you it it. Sometimes faith is not going
Speaker 2: to be on your side. You got to learn to
Speaker 2: land on the bolts, my friend. No, yeah, the bolts,
Speaker 2: otherwise your board will break. That's the all that's the
Speaker 2: other hard part about's getting you. You try and land
Speaker 2: it willy nilly in the middle, you're gonna break your
Speaker 2: board and you have to wait five months and mow
Speaker 2: lawns to get a new one. It was hard. It
Speaker 2: was hard grown up.
Speaker 1: So you were taking so much more risk than just
Speaker 1: the risk of physical hurt.
Speaker 2: There were so many times I would paint windows for
Speaker 2: Christmas to have money all year, and then I would
Speaker 2: buy a skateboard, go out and snap it in half
Speaker 2: immediately immediately. Because skateboards used to be made. There's a
Speaker 2: documentary about this guy that owned a lot of the companies.
Speaker 2: They were making the plywood skateboards in like a furniture store,
Speaker 2: and they skated well, but they broke. Like my little
Speaker 2: one hundred and fifty pound body was snapping boards like
Speaker 2: I'd go through like three in a summer. I feel like,
Speaker 2: now you can drive over them and they don't break.
Speaker 1: You should have gotten my skateboard brand this Stingray. Did
Speaker 1: I ever tell about the sting Ray I got for
Speaker 1: Christmas one year?
Speaker 2: No, I think I've seen a Stingray. I'm thinking of
Speaker 2: a bicycle though.
Speaker 1: Scene ray is, yes, there's Scenewray bicycle. But this thing
Speaker 1: was fully plastic. It was red, very thick, plastic, kind
Speaker 1: of small, and I tried to write it down our
Speaker 1: street which had just been like paved and graveled, and
Speaker 1: it was so loud the gravel, like the noise was
Speaker 1: so loud under it that I didn't realize a.
Speaker 2: Car was behind me. Oh wow.
Speaker 1: And that was the last time I skateboarded on the
Speaker 1: old sting Ray.
Speaker 2: You got hit by a car?
Speaker 1: No, no, no, I just was like, boo, I'm not
Speaker 1: qualified to be doing this on the road.
Speaker 2: I hate it when they invented that type of resurfacing.
Speaker 2: They lay down a bunch of oil and then pour
Speaker 2: gravel on it. Yeah, so then gravel coated rocks are
Speaker 2: flinging in the air, sticking to the side of your vehicle,
Speaker 2: and it doesn't become a smooth street for like three summers. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and then eventually it just takes too long. It's like,
Speaker 2: are you gonna do my street? Are you going to
Speaker 2: make nature do it over the course of my entire
Speaker 2: teenage years? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Or do we live in a poor part of town
Speaker 1: and you'll never fucking get know.
Speaker 2: It was because I was in the flats. Up on
Speaker 2: the hill they still had ass fault. Oh yeah, but
Speaker 2: down in the flats.
Speaker 1: You're left to your own devices.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's uh, and you would you would sometimes
Speaker 2: there would be an uncovered where they forgot to put
Speaker 2: some gravel. It's just a puddle of tar, and my
Speaker 2: dad go and sprinkle his own gravel.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he was.
Speaker 2: Left to his own devices. Sometimes when we have these
Speaker 2: conversations that go all around, I feel like it's an
Speaker 2: unused curb your enthusiasm scene.
Speaker 1: You mean cutting room floor?
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yes, yeah, something that you know.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, well, I sorry, I was I kind of
Speaker 1: uh checked out slightly because oh it's okay, I this
Speaker 1: drink is so sweet. Oh it's why take a sip
Speaker 1: of that if you dare.
Speaker 2: Okay, this is what a Lisa and I both ordered
Speaker 2: m That feels good on my cold sores. That's been
Speaker 2: That's an old bit. That's an old bit whenever I
Speaker 2: take it drink at Seventh's Drink. I'm sorry that I
Speaker 2: had to pull fifteen years old. I came up with
Speaker 2: that one. It's way too sweet.
Speaker 1: It's insane, right, yeah, not a way too sweet? What
Speaker 1: do you agree? I've had about seven Yeah. I mean
Speaker 1: it's like, I love the I love the energy behind it,
Speaker 1: but Jesus fucking Christ.
Speaker 2: There are times where I request one pump of vanilla
Speaker 2: and it still makes my teeth hurt. Yeah, So I
Speaker 2: just I'm a one one pump guy.
Speaker 1: Well, and also one time I was at a dunk
Speaker 1: I went to a Dunkin Donuts at the airport if
Speaker 1: I could remember where I was, which doesn't matter, but
Speaker 1: that's the kind of thing I start thinking of when
Speaker 1: I tell story like this. Yeah, and I got a
Speaker 1: bagel with cream cheese, and it was the sweetest bagel
Speaker 1: I'd ever had. Because it's like, oh yeah, it's Dunkin Donuts.
Speaker 1: They're like, oh right, everything here is has a glaze
Speaker 1: on it, like is sweetly delicious in the bagels?
Speaker 2: Really a sweet bagel. Are you sure they didn't just
Speaker 2: give you a donut? Uh? Yes?
Speaker 1: But that's that was the thing is like it was
Speaker 1: such a crazy taste to experience, like looking at a bagel, like,
Speaker 1: let's pull over for this.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Karen and I have both kind of volunteer firefighters.
Speaker 2: So we stopped three miles from an oncoming there. They're
Speaker 2: just up the street. Here. We're waiting for them.
Speaker 1: Because I was like, there's nowhere to pull over up.
Speaker 2: Then let's say, ooh, that guy flipped a U turn.
Speaker 2: He wants to help too.
Speaker 1: Ooh, he's coming after him.
Speaker 2: Citizens on Patrol. That's the wraps on from Police Academy too,
Speaker 2: colon Citizens on Patrol with a young David Spade.
Speaker 1: Do you remember any of the other words to citizens
Speaker 1: on Patrol?
Speaker 2: No? I do not. I do not. I've tried to,
Speaker 2: but I end up accidentally doing the wrap from Revenge
Speaker 2: of the Nerds. There's just there's a period of my
Speaker 2: life where I'd didn't go outside very much. He just
Speaker 2: watched VHS tapes, Yes, many VHS tapes, including a clockwork
Speaker 2: Orange which I shouldn't have seen at age twelve.
Speaker 1: Good lord, I know where where was the Jacques Tatis
Speaker 1: when you were putting that VHS tape in?
Speaker 2: I know, I know there was just it was just
Speaker 2: too much for me. That movie gave me nightmares as
Speaker 2: a kid. I should not have seen It's it's.
Speaker 1: So terribly inappropriate. But in there in so many scenes,
Speaker 1: but the one scene I remember because I feel like
Speaker 1: I was too young when I saw it, and I
Speaker 1: was like, probably college aged, but I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have seen that. That's so disturbing. But the
Speaker 1: one scene that really is disturbing is when they break
Speaker 1: into that house. Yeah, do that home invasion?
Speaker 2: That's where that's we of course when I'm thinking, of course, yeah,
Speaker 2: it absolutely uh you know you're not supposed to see
Speaker 2: that in a art with a movie that's like, oh,
Speaker 2: this is an artful art film, an artful art film.
Speaker 2: That's that's where my vocabulary is gone. But I'm not
Speaker 2: that's where your art is.
Speaker 1: Sorry, that truck looked like it was about to slim in.
Speaker 2: I like artful art.
Speaker 1: I think that's good. Yeah, thats in it.
Speaker 2: Yes, you can be seated, sir as I was saying
Speaker 2: security guard. Oh yeah, why don't you park in a neighborhood,
Speaker 2: you creep? Oh I am. There is a show so
Speaker 2: I know, I say artful art. But there's a show
Speaker 2: that Pat Oswald is hosting called One Percent, which isn't
Speaker 2: about tax brackets. It's about uh, you know, you work
Speaker 2: your way to all these levels of trivia and it's
Speaker 2: not trivia actually, it's like brain teasers and can you
Speaker 2: unscramble these words? Yeah, and it's all stuff that I
Speaker 2: remember being on an IQ test that I took for
Speaker 2: some college course and they said, oh, you have a
Speaker 2: very high IQ. I'm like, no, no, no, this This
Speaker 2: entire test was visual puzzles. I'm gonna be good at those.
Speaker 2: You put some math in there, it's over. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2: So I watched the entire episode. Granted there was some
Speaker 2: where you have to figure out there's all these clues.
Speaker 2: It's like, it's not after November, but it's before October whatever.
Speaker 2: It's it's narrowing it down with this long run on
Speaker 2: sentence to one month that you have to figure out
Speaker 2: that one. I did have to pause. It was the
Speaker 2: final question.
Speaker 1: To think it through.
Speaker 2: Yes, I just had to read this sentence, was it August?
Speaker 2: It was April and I got it right, and the
Speaker 2: person that won bet all the money and she didn't
Speaker 2: get it anyway. I won one hundred thousand dollars the
Speaker 2: other I got all the questions and that was the
Speaker 2: only one. I had to pause and like kind of
Speaker 2: figure it out.
Speaker 1: That's exciting, which.
Speaker 2: You probably don't have the luxury on that show, but
Speaker 2: who knows, maybe they edited it to make it look
Speaker 2: like it's last time. But I was like, do I
Speaker 2: have to be on this show? Because so it starts
Speaker 2: with this first question, ninety percent of the Americans poll
Speaker 2: got it, and then it's seventy and then and then
Speaker 2: you're only one percent of the country knew this question.
Speaker 2: It was that month one, and I felt I was like,
Speaker 2: wanted to again. I don't have Patent's phone number, but
Speaker 2: I was like, get me on the show.
Speaker 1: Wait to say, though, can I just say you should
Speaker 1: be on the show?
Speaker 2: I want to be on it.
Speaker 1: You clearly have this is it's a certain type of intelligence,
Speaker 1: its visual intelli.
Speaker 2: I was wrong when I said trivia it is it.
Speaker 1: Is U puzzles.
Speaker 2: Puzzles, Yeah, we're scrambles. Also, which pig gets to the house. First,
Speaker 2: you have to look at the map like it starts
Speaker 2: with things that would be in Highlights magazine, the publication
Speaker 2: and your dentist's office. Fun, right, I love it.
Speaker 1: Please, don't man explain Highlights Magazine to me.
Speaker 2: I just wanted you to remember that it was in
Speaker 2: your dentists Sophie.
Speaker 1: Don't you dare talk to about doctor Brown aren Let.
Speaker 2: Me tell you a little bit about Highlights. Oftentimes they'll
Speaker 2: show a tree and it says find the coconut and
Speaker 2: the monkey and the tree.
Speaker 1: There's two boys you've never heard of them. They're called
Speaker 1: Goofus and Gallon. Oh god, I loved that magazine.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I got so excited. And these for those little
Speaker 2: visual uh you know, mazes and word scrambles. But also
Speaker 2: there is just logic questions. But none of it is
Speaker 2: what history. You know, jeopardy will I will feel so dumb.
Speaker 2: If it's English literature for five hundred, I'm just like, okay,
Speaker 2: the best. I should have paid more attention in school.
Speaker 2: But this one, dare, I say, is all street smart. Well.
Speaker 1: Also, I need to just remind you of this, which
Speaker 1: you know, I don't want to be. I don't want
Speaker 1: to harsh. Your one percent vibe right, and now I'm
Speaker 1: excited to watch that show. But just remember that if
Speaker 1: you are on it and then you start to get
Speaker 1: them wrong. I just want to remind you during Quarantine,
Speaker 1: when we were on that Zoom game show and you
Speaker 1: just got up and walked away. Oh remember that you
Speaker 1: thought you were having technical problems. You got so mad
Speaker 1: that you just went and started doing pull ups.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did start doing this.
Speaker 1: The funniest thing I've ever seen in my life.
Speaker 2: It's even worse. They were just chin ups. Yeah. I
Speaker 2: am competitive, and I didn't know that I was because
Speaker 2: I didn't play a lot of team sports. But if
Speaker 2: I start to lose, I will go off on my
Speaker 2: own and punish myself with exercise.
Speaker 1: So just be here.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's gonna happen on the one percent,
Speaker 1: but just remember you're gonna be on a TV set.
Speaker 1: You're gonna probably have to ask for that chin up bar.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Patton, I'd love to be on the show, But
Speaker 2: one question. Do you have a workout room for those
Speaker 2: who hate themselves?
Speaker 1: I might have to storm off mid taping.
Speaker 2: To some aerobics. Yeah, it's easy watching while you're doing
Speaker 2: something like sewing patches on a pairavetty Bower shorts.
Speaker 1: I want to watch that.
Speaker 2: Yeah me sewing now, thank you, I did it all
Speaker 2: by hand. But it's yeah, it's it's really good show.
Speaker 2: And Patten the jokes that he has during the like
Speaker 2: thirty seconds they have to figure out each question, they're
Speaker 2: solid jokes, and I think they rehearse the banter with
Speaker 2: the guests, Like it's not just like Jeopardy where it's like, oh,
Speaker 2: you want to mention what you do and your kids.
Speaker 2: They have like little bits worked out, and all the
Speaker 2: guests are so good at riffing with Patten. It's what
Speaker 2: like at midnight, but what at midnight used to be.
Speaker 1: I'm so interested in you're.
Speaker 2: Looking at your phone while I'm talking about Pattent's.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry because I'm looking up the show to see, oh,
Speaker 1: because you know, he got to hire his own writers.
Speaker 1: I just want to see because there's.
Speaker 2: So many good jokes on it. Yeah, but the people
Speaker 2: are in the middle of figuring out a question, so
Speaker 2: they probably aren't listening to the jokes like you're you
Speaker 2: know I am though, Yeah, these are really good jokes. Yeah,
Speaker 2: one Percent is a very good show.
Speaker 1: Let's take it the little peeky poo at exactly who's involved.
Speaker 2: And it's funny because you hear one percent and you
Speaker 2: think of uber rich people, which I guess you would be. Coincidentally,
Speaker 2: if you won, you would be in that tax bracket. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's that one hundred thousand dollars, but suddenly turn to
Speaker 2: forty five and then you're like, now I know why
Speaker 2: my uncle with three boats is always complaining. But it
Speaker 2: it is very good. I watched the whole season actually created.
Speaker 1: By Andy Auerbach and Dean Nabarro and Wes Cobble. Is
Speaker 1: this show running the.
Speaker 2: Bottle jumping home show? What? Anyway? That's what I'm that's
Speaker 2: when I'm plugging. We're in the parking lot, so I
Speaker 2: know we're going to wrap it up. But everyone watched
Speaker 2: one percent one percent.
Speaker 1: I love. That's a good wreck.
Speaker 2: And also Zoro and watch at Zoro. It may or
Speaker 2: may not be an Espaniel. And be sure to like
Speaker 2: and subscribe and enjoin my no Comply video.
Speaker 1: Oh please support Chris's viral moments.
Speaker 2: At this point, I've probably earned nine dollars during this drive.
Speaker 1: Oh here's the thing we never say, mm hmm, thank
Speaker 1: you nine dollars. Thank you. Well, we never tell our
Speaker 1: audience because we have the best audience. We truly do
Speaker 1: our listeners really are.
Speaker 2: I miss them and I used to see them and
Speaker 2: I want to go get back out there.
Speaker 1: You got to go see them again. But thank you
Speaker 1: so much for always supporting. Do you need ride if
Speaker 1: you would like to support us further? And reviewing and
Speaker 1: subscribing to the podcast makes a huge difference. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: and we never really say stuff like that, and we
Speaker 1: started to say it on My Favorite Murder and it
Speaker 1: made a huge difference. Like people actually will go do
Speaker 1: it if you're like, hey, if you're in the like
Speaker 1: iTunes podcast app, you can just go rate it right
Speaker 1: on the show page. There's like five empty stars. You
Speaker 1: can give us as many as you want, please, sir,
Speaker 1: you can do whatever you want.
Speaker 2: But imagine me coming up with soot on my face
Speaker 2: and fingerless gloves, I have an upturned hat. Please rate
Speaker 2: our podcast please.
Speaker 1: If you like it, maybe other people will like it
Speaker 1: as well.
Speaker 2: Yeah, even right, like a nice yelp.
Speaker 1: Review exactly, But don't write it on yellp.
Speaker 2: Don't get on yelp. It's impossible. They make you download
Speaker 2: the app and.
Speaker 1: Also it's yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well you can't listen to podcasts on Yelp. I
Speaker 2: wish I never mentioned it.
Speaker 1: Uh, but I think this might be our fightiest episode ever.
Speaker 2: I'm furious you could have had my back on so
Speaker 2: many things that I said that made no sense.
Speaker 1: You know what I want you to do?
Speaker 2: More?
Speaker 1: Chin ups? Get over there?
Speaker 2: You stop no budding me, stop no complying me. Well
Speaker 2: you used to no comply. Okay, let's stop this. You've
Speaker 2: been listening to Do you Need a Ride?
Speaker 1: D y n A.
Speaker 2: This has been an Exactly Right production produced by Analise Nelson,
Speaker 2: mixed by Edson Choi.
Speaker 1: Our talent booker is Patrick Cootner.
Speaker 2: Theme song by Karen Kilgarreth.
Speaker 1: Artwork by Chris Fairbanks. Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter,
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Speaker 2: For more information, go to exactly Rightmedia dot com.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Oh You're welcome