WEBVTT - What Saved the American Bison

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<v Speaker 1>Brought to you by the reinvented two thousand twelve camera.

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<v Speaker 1>It's ready. Are you welcome to Stuff You Should Know?

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<v Speaker 1>From House Stuff Works dot Com? Hey, and welcome to

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<v Speaker 1>the podcast. I'm Josh Clark. There's Charles W. Chuck Bryant,

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<v Speaker 1>and that makes this stuff you should Know the big

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<v Speaker 1>wooly addition. Yeah, I'm kind of excited about this one. Yeah, man,

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<v Speaker 1>we've seen one of those before. We're talking about bison's

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<v Speaker 1>by the way, Yeah, I thought you might bring that up. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>we we saw one at that animal preserve. There was

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<v Speaker 1>like a bear and a bison and they were fighting.

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<v Speaker 1>This little depressing next year, but they are supposedly rescued animals.

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<v Speaker 1>Um at this animal petting zoo, this wild game petting zoo.

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<v Speaker 1>And that was a smart bison because he had learned

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<v Speaker 1>to go to the little shoot where you would put

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<v Speaker 1>his food. And wasn't he doing something too? He's manipulating

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<v Speaker 1>it somehow sounds like it, or he was trying to

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<v Speaker 1>manipulate us into giving him some food. I can't remember

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<v Speaker 1>there's some manipulation involved, because I remember thinking like, huh,

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<v Speaker 1>bisons are very manipulative animals. Jerks. I have a story

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<v Speaker 1>for you to start this one. If you like that.

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<v Speaker 1>That sounds great, Chuck. Have I ever told you about

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<v Speaker 1>my one glorious football story. I've heard little bits about

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<v Speaker 1>your football experience, that you were a bigger kids. He

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<v Speaker 1>played on the line, and that's about all I can remember. Okay, Well,

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<v Speaker 1>as a child, I went to Beverly Elementary School and

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<v Speaker 1>I played football for them. Uh And the way it

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<v Speaker 1>was in Toledo was you would play for your elementary

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<v Speaker 1>schools team when you got the middle school. Interesting, so

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<v Speaker 1>you could play your last year of elementary school sixth grade,

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<v Speaker 1>but then you could keep playing through seventh and eighth grade,

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<v Speaker 1>but it was for your elementary school. It was weird.

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<v Speaker 1>But so I played for Beverly Elementary, which meant I

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<v Speaker 1>was Beverly Iison. And I was probably the kid on

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<v Speaker 1>the team that must resemble the Bison because I was

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<v Speaker 1>a pretty big, fat kid and I was aligneman. And um,

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<v Speaker 1>I sucked at football because no one ever explained any

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<v Speaker 1>strategy to me. It wasn't until college that I understood

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<v Speaker 1>that football even had strategy. Old technique, Yeah, I thought

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<v Speaker 1>it was just like block that guy right right. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>So I didn't teach you to swim, move nothing. They

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<v Speaker 1>taught me nothing. It was literally like just stand there

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<v Speaker 1>and don't let that guy through. That's what I was taught.

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<v Speaker 1>Failed by all coaches. Um. Anyway, I did have one

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<v Speaker 1>shining moment. Right I was eighth grade. I was third string.

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<v Speaker 1>We were playing the Colts. I can't remember what school,

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<v Speaker 1>but they were the worst team, and uh we were.

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<v Speaker 1>We had the game in hand and the Colts were

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<v Speaker 1>all like just three and a half foot tall, little

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<v Speaker 1>pint sized kids. So we had the game in hand. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>it was late in the game and they put me

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<v Speaker 1>in as a defensive lineman. Right to you're the biggest

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<v Speaker 1>guy on the team and your third string. I am

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<v Speaker 1>at this point the biggest guy on the field. But yes,

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<v Speaker 1>I was third strict grade two. Um, so they at

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<v Speaker 1>this point in the biggest guy in the field and

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<v Speaker 1>they put me in and um, and I'm I'm like,

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<v Speaker 1>I pointed to the quarterback. I'm like, I'm gonna I'm

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<v Speaker 1>coming for you. They put two guys on me. Right

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<v Speaker 1>the quarterback hikes the ball. He's he's appropriately nervous because

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<v Speaker 1>I'm staring at him. He knows like I'm gonna get

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<v Speaker 1>to him. One way or the other. This is like

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<v Speaker 1>my my last chance, right, these two guys come at me,

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<v Speaker 1>these two offensive linemen. I just grabbed both of the

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<v Speaker 1>bachelor helmets and just push him down, like right underneath,

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<v Speaker 1>but go right through him. Yeah. I don't like after

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<v Speaker 1>this is the coach, You're like, maybe we should put

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<v Speaker 1>this kid in, you know, earlier in the season. Anyway,

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<v Speaker 1>I um, I push. I just get through both of

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<v Speaker 1>the guys who are who are on me? I go,

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<v Speaker 1>is it? Well, that's what I did. I go right

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<v Speaker 1>to the quarterback, didn't tackle him. I picked him up

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<v Speaker 1>and threw him down. I didn't even like stagger. I

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<v Speaker 1>just picked the just kid up and through them. And

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<v Speaker 1>I turned around. I was like, yeah, you know what

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't know is I caused a fumble and one

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<v Speaker 1>of our guys picked up and ran it in for

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<v Speaker 1>a touchdown. I didn't find out until after that the

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<v Speaker 1>play was over. So your line cheat that day was

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<v Speaker 1>once one play, one sack, one force fumble. Yeah that's awesome. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and a touchdown as a result of the fumbles. So

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<v Speaker 1>that was my big story as Beverly Bison. And that

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<v Speaker 1>is the the the intro. I guess you could say

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<v Speaker 1>to this, what happened to bring the Bisons back from

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<v Speaker 1>the verge of extinction. I think that might have helped

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<v Speaker 1>the cause. I think it did too. Perhaps I've always

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<v Speaker 1>had an infinity affinity for Bisons ever since playing for

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<v Speaker 1>the Beverly Bisons. But I think we should probably start out, chuck,

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<v Speaker 1>what what's Some people might be like, I've heard a buffalo,

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<v Speaker 1>but I don't know what a bison is. Well, if

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<v Speaker 1>you've heard of a buffalo and you're an American, you've

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<v Speaker 1>heard a bison, pal you're confused. That's right right here

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<v Speaker 1>in the States, they're bison. Technically, they're pretty in are changeably.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, you can call him a buffalo. But technically

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<v Speaker 1>a buffalo is a cape buffalo or water buffalo, and

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<v Speaker 1>they're native to Africa and Asia. The bison's native to

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<v Speaker 1>here in the United States, North America typically specifically, and

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<v Speaker 1>the word buffalo comes from the French. Seventeenth century explorers

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<v Speaker 1>encountered these things and said, let both what is that beef?

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<v Speaker 1>It means oxen or beeves whatever, beavis be e e

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<v Speaker 1>v e s is what I said, Okay, And then uh,

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<v Speaker 1>the English folks arrive later and change it to La

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<v Speaker 1>buff and then Buffalo, then Buffaler, than Buffio and eventually

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<v Speaker 1>they settled on Buffalo. So that's where we're at now,

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<v Speaker 1>that's where right now. But so they're both members of

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<v Speaker 1>the Boviday family. UM, and they're very much related. But yes,

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<v Speaker 1>one lives in Asia and Africa, one lives in North America.

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<v Speaker 1>And we've got two um types of buffalo or bison

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry. In North America. We've got the wood bison,

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<v Speaker 1>which is the smaller the two, and then the planes bison,

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<v Speaker 1>which is the big, the big daddy. Yeah. And they

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<v Speaker 1>you know, if you've ever seen the one with the

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<v Speaker 1>big hump, that's the wood bison. The planes bison has

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<v Speaker 1>the flat back, more distinctive cape, and a more well

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<v Speaker 1>developed beard in throat main. Is that right? So the

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<v Speaker 1>one with the big hump is the wood bison because

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<v Speaker 1>the hump from ground to hump can get up to

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<v Speaker 1>like six ft tall. Yeah, that's huge. Uh. Let's talk

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<v Speaker 1>numbers first, like sheer numbers. UM. In two thousand seven

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<v Speaker 1>they did a bison census and the number on private

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<v Speaker 1>ranches was add to thirty four. That is significantly more

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<v Speaker 1>than it was a century earlier. UM. About two d

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<v Speaker 1>and twenty thousand in Canada, and about twenty and of

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<v Speaker 1>these bison in the United States and Canada are roaming

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<v Speaker 1>free on public land, and close to a half a

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<v Speaker 1>million total herd in North America today. But at one point,

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<v Speaker 1>the chuck in about eight there were maybe in all

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<v Speaker 1>of North America five hundred of these things five hundred,

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<v Speaker 1>and those five hundred were federally protected on federally protected land.

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<v Speaker 1>Prior to that, say, I think it was in Lost

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<v Speaker 1>Part Colorado, UH, poachers killed four bison, UH, and those

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<v Speaker 1>four represented the last unprotected free roaming bison herd in

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<v Speaker 1>the in North America and thus ended what was called

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<v Speaker 1>the Great Slaughter, which we'll get to in a second.

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<v Speaker 1>But let's go even further back to really get to

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<v Speaker 1>to the the the point about how few five hundred

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<v Speaker 1>bison is in like say ere, you have to understand

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<v Speaker 1>how many there were in say seventeen hundred. I've seen

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<v Speaker 1>estimates is high as sixty million. That far back. Oh yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>chew on this pal I saw an estimate as high

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<v Speaker 1>as a hundred millions. Yeah, normally the accepted number UM

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<v Speaker 1>was proposed by a guy named Um Shepherd crushed the third,

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<v Speaker 1>he's an anthropologist from Brown University in he came up

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<v Speaker 1>with an estimate of thirty million. And if you're an

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<v Speaker 1>anthropologist or a wildlife biologist, or just a bison enthusiast,

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<v Speaker 1>you're probably gonna go with thirty million. At any given time,

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<v Speaker 1>there were thirty million pre European um settlement. There are

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<v Speaker 1>thirty million bison roaming North America at any given time. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>they were the largest large mammal in the United in

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<v Speaker 1>North America, the largest uh population at one point. But

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<v Speaker 1>they're also the largest physically. They were about two thousand pounds.

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<v Speaker 1>The average mail is about two thousand pounds. And they're

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<v Speaker 1>quick too. They can get up to like thirty five

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<v Speaker 1>miles an hour. Two thousand pounds thirty five miles an hour.

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<v Speaker 1>And there are thirty million of these things running around.

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<v Speaker 1>That's a ton. That's that's a lot of times tons. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and they spanned They obviously made their home most abundantly

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<v Speaker 1>in the Great Plains because there was lots of great

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<v Speaker 1>virgin grassland that was packed with vitamins and minerals, which

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<v Speaker 1>allowed it to grow back really fast after it was eaten.

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<v Speaker 1>From Canada to northern Mexico, tons and tons of buffalo. So, um,

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<v Speaker 1>there's something interesting if you've read that pops up towards

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<v Speaker 1>the end of the book. I know I keep going

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<v Speaker 1>back to this well, but it is it is really wet.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a consistent thread. Um there were there. There's this

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<v Speaker 1>whole idea that what the settlers out west around the

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<v Speaker 1>plains encountered and took to be like a wild state,

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<v Speaker 1>like the natural wild state of tens of millions of

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<v Speaker 1>buffalo running everywhere, was actually a freak of nature. Right

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<v Speaker 1>that you have um an apex predator in any ecosystem,

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<v Speaker 1>and if you remove the apex predator, all the other

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<v Speaker 1>all the other UM species are allowed to just boom

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<v Speaker 1>right in on the great planes. The apex predator was

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<v Speaker 1>man human in the form of Native Americans who were

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<v Speaker 1>removed from the ecosystem, and without the Native Americans to

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<v Speaker 1>effectively manage the herb populations and the prairie lands, UH,

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<v Speaker 1>buffaloes were allowed to explode to unnatural population numbers. So

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<v Speaker 1>there's an idea that what we took and still to

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<v Speaker 1>the state consider was a natural population of thirty million

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<v Speaker 1>was actually far far less than that. Prior to the

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<v Speaker 1>Colombian exchange. Really Yeah, very interesting? Didn't that interesting? Either way?

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<v Speaker 1>They're probably about thirty million buffalo roaming the Great Planes

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<v Speaker 1>in state seventeen hundred. That number dropped dramatically starting about

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<v Speaker 1>eighteen twenty, right, yeah, with the Great Slaughter. Uh pre um,

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<v Speaker 1>Well we'll get to the horse. Pre horse. Dating back

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<v Speaker 1>to prehistoric times, there was what was known as buffalo jumps.

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<v Speaker 1>Did you see this? So buffalo jumps are were when

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<v Speaker 1>they would Native Americans would herd buffalo down these narrow

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<v Speaker 1>shoots and run them off a cliff like lemmings like lemmings,

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<v Speaker 1>and it would break their legs. I mean not such

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<v Speaker 1>a cliff that it would you know, destroy the animal completely.

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<v Speaker 1>It would just break their legs so they couldn't move.

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<v Speaker 1>And then they would you know, they had guys waiting

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<v Speaker 1>down there with spears and stuff and clubs to kill them.

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<v Speaker 1>And it was sort of like the first factory farms

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<v Speaker 1>that was where they were would get large abundance over

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<v Speaker 1>and over abundance of buffalo meat and pelts and all

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<v Speaker 1>the stuff that they use. And uh. There is today

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<v Speaker 1>in Canada a World Heritage Site called head Smashed in

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<v Speaker 1>Buffalo Jump, and it is one of the oldest and

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<v Speaker 1>largest and best preserved buffalo jumps known to exist today.

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<v Speaker 1>And if you go to their website, it has a

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<v Speaker 1>little animation of buffalo like lemmings like running and then

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<v Speaker 1>falling off a cliff, over and over and over. Right,

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<v Speaker 1>And I should also insert here that Chuck and I

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<v Speaker 1>are both fully aware that lemmings don't naturally run over

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<v Speaker 1>the cliff. That that was actually the producers of the

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<v Speaker 1>Walt Disney documentary that created that myth and drove those

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<v Speaker 1>poor lemmings over the cliff. That's true. Yeah, I'm glad

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<v Speaker 1>you said that because we heard about that. Uh So,

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<v Speaker 1>at any rate, they were buffalo jumps. That was a

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<v Speaker 1>way to get lots and lots of buffalo dead quickly.

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<v Speaker 1>And if you live in Alberta, you can go see

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<v Speaker 1>the head smashed in Buffalo Jump for a mere ten

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<v Speaker 1>dollars for an adult. And not only if you live there,

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<v Speaker 1>if you're visiting there you could do it too. That's right.

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<v Speaker 1>But the Native American had a I mean, I know

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<v Speaker 1>the white man is blamed for it, and they largely

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<v Speaker 1>are responsible for the mass slaughter, but the Comanche Indian

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<v Speaker 1>in the eighteen thirties were killing close to three hundred

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<v Speaker 1>thousand bison a year, which was not a sustainable number. Right.

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<v Speaker 1>That's actually a very hot topic. Um. You know, there's

0:13:19.240 --> 0:13:23.360
<v Speaker 1>the idea that the Native Americans are the noble savage um,

0:13:23.440 --> 0:13:26.720
<v Speaker 1>and then there's also evidence that they're not, that they weren't.

0:13:27.160 --> 0:13:30.120
<v Speaker 1>There was this thing called bison overkill. Um. They also

0:13:30.160 --> 0:13:32.320
<v Speaker 1>believe that that's what happened to the mastodon and the

0:13:32.320 --> 0:13:35.520
<v Speaker 1>sabretooth tiger and that they were basically hunted to extinction

0:13:36.160 --> 0:13:39.320
<v Speaker 1>um by like the Clovis people, and the Clovis people

0:13:39.320 --> 0:13:42.640
<v Speaker 1>in turn became extinct as well. It's like a highly

0:13:42.920 --> 0:13:47.240
<v Speaker 1>debatable topic of over exactly what happened. But if that's true,

0:13:47.480 --> 0:13:51.760
<v Speaker 1>then that means that bison have always been over hunted

0:13:52.320 --> 0:13:55.160
<v Speaker 1>because if the Commanche were doing that, and apparently it

0:13:55.200 --> 0:13:59.280
<v Speaker 1>takes six to seven bison to to for a person

0:13:59.320 --> 0:14:04.480
<v Speaker 1>to subsist a year, six bison per person per year. Yeah,

0:14:04.520 --> 0:14:07.959
<v Speaker 1>but that's without agriculture, Like, that's just living on bison.

0:14:08.360 --> 0:14:13.200
<v Speaker 1>Can you imagine your your stool productions just like bison

0:14:13.320 --> 0:14:16.079
<v Speaker 1>break for the spic and the eggs bison burgers. Yeah,

0:14:16.120 --> 0:14:18.520
<v Speaker 1>and I would imagine your sweat smells like vinegar because

0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:22.080
<v Speaker 1>apparently you have a high protein, low carb diet, you

0:14:22.160 --> 0:14:27.000
<v Speaker 1>sweat vinegar. It is gross, believe me. The railroad industry

0:14:27.080 --> 0:14:29.720
<v Speaker 1>was also a great threat to the bison because the

0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:32.200
<v Speaker 1>bison were a threat to the railroad industry. And you

0:14:32.240 --> 0:14:34.320
<v Speaker 1>know who won that war. Well, there's a guy um

0:14:34.480 --> 0:14:36.800
<v Speaker 1>named Frank Row who who wrote a book in nineteen

0:14:36.840 --> 0:14:39.760
<v Speaker 1>seventy two called the North American Buffalo, and he cites

0:14:40.120 --> 0:14:43.960
<v Speaker 1>um a train that was headed west in eighteen fifty

0:14:44.000 --> 0:14:46.080
<v Speaker 1>that had to wait for three days for a herd

0:14:46.120 --> 0:14:49.360
<v Speaker 1>of bison to cross the track them and they weren't

0:14:49.360 --> 0:14:54.160
<v Speaker 1>necessarily slow moving. There's just that many bison. Um. So yeah,

0:14:54.320 --> 0:14:57.520
<v Speaker 1>we reached the point now where the the White Man

0:14:57.640 --> 0:15:01.600
<v Speaker 1>has entered the picture, the Winchester fifty aliber rifles under

0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:03.680
<v Speaker 1>the picture, and the horses under the picture. So all

0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:07.479
<v Speaker 1>of these factors that would lead to the near extinction

0:15:07.520 --> 0:15:10.800
<v Speaker 1>of bison have all come together and converged on the

0:15:10.840 --> 0:15:13.920
<v Speaker 1>Great Planes and they are about to unleash holy hell

0:15:14.320 --> 0:15:19.520
<v Speaker 1>on the bison population, the Great Slaughter. So do you, like,

0:15:20.080 --> 0:15:21.760
<v Speaker 1>have you heard about the Great Slaughter? Do you know

0:15:21.840 --> 0:15:24.720
<v Speaker 1>some things about it? I know that they could have

0:15:24.760 --> 0:15:29.400
<v Speaker 1>been potentially killing like two hundred thousand buffalo per day.

0:15:29.960 --> 0:15:33.880
<v Speaker 1>At one point, they had contests, Chuck, they were buffalo

0:15:34.000 --> 0:15:38.080
<v Speaker 1>killing contests the railroads, like you said, to get rid

0:15:38.080 --> 0:15:41.760
<v Speaker 1>of this bison problem. They also figured out how to

0:15:41.800 --> 0:15:45.200
<v Speaker 1>make money by hosting hunting expeditions where you never left

0:15:45.200 --> 0:15:48.440
<v Speaker 1>the train. The trainer just drives slowly and you would shoot.

0:15:49.760 --> 0:15:53.680
<v Speaker 1>It's also in dead Man. Oh yeah, Um, that was real.

0:15:54.400 --> 0:15:57.200
<v Speaker 1>They had bison killing contests. There's a man who holds

0:15:57.240 --> 0:16:01.400
<v Speaker 1>the record in eighteen seventy Helo Bill. No, no, he

0:16:01.520 --> 0:16:04.400
<v Speaker 1>had Buffalo Bill beat A man named Thomas C. Nixon

0:16:04.440 --> 0:16:07.000
<v Speaker 1>of Kansas set the record in eighteen seventy, killing one

0:16:07.400 --> 0:16:12.240
<v Speaker 1>and twenty bison in forty minutes. Buffalo Bill supposedly killed many,

0:16:12.280 --> 0:16:16.400
<v Speaker 1>many thousands himself. He was hired to do that. Um

0:16:16.480 --> 0:16:19.160
<v Speaker 1>and hides were going for two dollars ahead and in

0:16:19.240 --> 0:16:21.800
<v Speaker 1>the winner of eighteen seventy two to seventy three, just

0:16:21.840 --> 0:16:25.480
<v Speaker 1>the winner one point five million buffalo hides. Bison hides

0:16:25.480 --> 0:16:28.480
<v Speaker 1>were shipped back east by train. Well. I do know

0:16:28.520 --> 0:16:31.080
<v Speaker 1>at one point that they said that the big hunters

0:16:31.120 --> 0:16:34.920
<v Speaker 1>were using two guns because they were shooting them so fast,

0:16:35.880 --> 0:16:38.200
<v Speaker 1>they had to let one gun cool down, and so

0:16:38.280 --> 0:16:40.480
<v Speaker 1>they just picked up the fresh gun so they wouldn't

0:16:40.520 --> 0:16:43.360
<v Speaker 1>have to stop killing. Yeah, at first, like they were

0:16:43.400 --> 0:16:46.440
<v Speaker 1>shooting him for meat, and then buffalo hide, bison hide

0:16:46.440 --> 0:16:49.720
<v Speaker 1>became all the rage, not just back East but in

0:16:49.760 --> 0:16:52.720
<v Speaker 1>Europe as well. Demand increase, so they're like, oh, well,

0:16:52.800 --> 0:16:55.480
<v Speaker 1>let's you know, we'll just leave the meat there. We

0:16:55.520 --> 0:16:57.800
<v Speaker 1>don't need the meat. There's millions of these things, rotting

0:16:57.800 --> 0:17:03.000
<v Speaker 1>carcasses everywhere. Um And as if this couldn't get worse,

0:17:03.360 --> 0:17:06.200
<v Speaker 1>as if it couldn't get worse, right, So the poor

0:17:06.240 --> 0:17:11.240
<v Speaker 1>bison population, possibly if there was bison overkill, their apex

0:17:11.280 --> 0:17:14.160
<v Speaker 1>predators removed, they're allowed to bloom, and then a new,

0:17:14.400 --> 0:17:18.680
<v Speaker 1>even more damaging apex predator comes in starts killing indiscriminately

0:17:18.760 --> 0:17:21.640
<v Speaker 1>like they've never seen before. The one of the reasons

0:17:21.640 --> 0:17:24.080
<v Speaker 1>why they had bison killing contests was not just for

0:17:24.240 --> 0:17:29.080
<v Speaker 1>the railroad, but it was because the um federal government

0:17:29.320 --> 0:17:32.840
<v Speaker 1>in whites in general figured out that the planes Indians

0:17:33.560 --> 0:17:37.439
<v Speaker 1>subsisted on bison take away. The bison take away the

0:17:37.560 --> 0:17:41.200
<v Speaker 1>food supply. You civilized the Indian. So that was one

0:17:41.280 --> 0:17:44.280
<v Speaker 1>reason why bisons were hunted to near extinction with so

0:17:44.440 --> 0:17:47.840
<v Speaker 1>such glee was because it was serving a larger purpose

0:17:47.960 --> 0:17:50.960
<v Speaker 1>of bringing the Indians into the fold as well. So

0:17:50.960 --> 0:17:56.560
<v Speaker 1>there's a way to tame the West. We're starving them.

0:17:57.160 --> 0:18:01.320
<v Speaker 1>So again we get down to what five bison that

0:18:01.480 --> 0:18:07.400
<v Speaker 1>are finally protected. Um, and it's starting in nineteen o six.

0:18:07.400 --> 0:18:10.359
<v Speaker 1>Who who is responsible for this? Uh, nineteen oh five

0:18:11.480 --> 0:18:13.359
<v Speaker 1>environmentalist he might have heard of by the name of

0:18:13.359 --> 0:18:18.199
<v Speaker 1>Teddy Roosevelt and William Hornaday, who was a zoologists, poet,

0:18:18.400 --> 0:18:23.760
<v Speaker 1>can conservationist, songwriter, realtor evidently thought that was odd. That

0:18:23.920 --> 0:18:25.680
<v Speaker 1>is not well, you gotta make money somehow because those

0:18:25.680 --> 0:18:29.200
<v Speaker 1>other ones aren't doing so. Uh. He was a really

0:18:29.320 --> 0:18:32.560
<v Speaker 1>top notch conservationists actually. But um, William Hornaday and Teddy

0:18:32.600 --> 0:18:36.560
<v Speaker 1>Roosevelt formed the American Bison Society nineteen o five because

0:18:36.560 --> 0:18:39.240
<v Speaker 1>they were like, wait a minute, these things are remember

0:18:39.240 --> 0:18:40.800
<v Speaker 1>all those buffalo that used to be out there that

0:18:40.840 --> 0:18:43.600
<v Speaker 1>aren't there anymore? Like this might be a problem. They're like,

0:18:43.640 --> 0:18:46.320
<v Speaker 1>what are we gonna hunt? And so we're better to

0:18:46.359 --> 0:18:48.399
<v Speaker 1>send them plus send them to the Bronx in New

0:18:48.480 --> 0:18:52.119
<v Speaker 1>York City, the Great Plains of the Bronx. Yeah, and

0:18:52.119 --> 0:18:54.160
<v Speaker 1>it definitely got him out of the hands of poachers.

0:18:54.680 --> 0:18:57.080
<v Speaker 1>Uh and kidding aside, though the bronx who was a

0:18:57.080 --> 0:19:02.120
<v Speaker 1>great place for them to send some species for uh reproducing.

0:19:02.560 --> 0:19:05.119
<v Speaker 1>And Yellowstone National Park was established as a as a

0:19:05.160 --> 0:19:07.479
<v Speaker 1>preserve and the New Yorkers got to sit there and

0:19:07.480 --> 0:19:11.159
<v Speaker 1>watch bison getting it on. I guess so nicol ahead,

0:19:11.880 --> 0:19:17.919
<v Speaker 1>nick boy, not a buffalo, nickel uh huh uh. They

0:19:17.960 --> 0:19:21.320
<v Speaker 1>also uh the night created the federal government created the

0:19:21.400 --> 0:19:24.720
<v Speaker 1>National Bison Range in Montana. But these weren't the efforts

0:19:24.720 --> 0:19:27.879
<v Speaker 1>that ultimately did a lot to increase the numbers. No,

0:19:28.080 --> 0:19:31.440
<v Speaker 1>because you know what, although they were protected, and Congress

0:19:31.480 --> 0:19:36.680
<v Speaker 1>actually did pass an act um, the Federal Park Protective Act.

0:19:36.760 --> 0:19:39.960
<v Speaker 1>I believe that said if you poach buffalo, you're in

0:19:39.960 --> 0:19:45.520
<v Speaker 1>big trouble. Um, they were never listed as endangered. Yeah,

0:19:45.520 --> 0:19:47.359
<v Speaker 1>I wonder why I couldn't get a reason there, So

0:19:47.480 --> 0:19:50.439
<v Speaker 1>I don't know either. But they were clearly close to

0:19:50.480 --> 0:19:52.320
<v Speaker 1>being in danger, but they were never listed, so they

0:19:52.320 --> 0:19:56.760
<v Speaker 1>didn't enjoy that full protection. So Roosevelt, he he had

0:19:56.800 --> 0:19:59.919
<v Speaker 1>a pretty good effort by establishing the Park Service, yellow

0:20:00.040 --> 0:20:03.120
<v Speaker 1>Stone had a protected heard. You had him in the Bronxoo,

0:20:03.160 --> 0:20:05.400
<v Speaker 1>you had him in Oklahoma, you had him in in

0:20:05.600 --> 0:20:09.600
<v Speaker 1>um South Dakota. But none of these, like you said,

0:20:09.920 --> 0:20:13.800
<v Speaker 1>led to the real resurgence, the the um, the resurgence

0:20:13.840 --> 0:20:18.080
<v Speaker 1>in the bison population in North America. What did, though, Chuck, Well,

0:20:18.160 --> 0:20:20.960
<v Speaker 1>maybe we should talk about well, yeah, sure, what did uh?

0:20:21.200 --> 0:20:26.320
<v Speaker 1>Private landowners? Head Turner, head freaking turner. Yeah, he was

0:20:26.359 --> 0:20:30.480
<v Speaker 1>the one responsible for bringing the bike the bison back

0:20:30.560 --> 0:20:34.520
<v Speaker 1>from the near extinction. He's one of my heroes. Should

0:20:34.560 --> 0:20:37.160
<v Speaker 1>we just give a few Turner stats here? The second

0:20:37.280 --> 0:20:41.400
<v Speaker 1>largest private landowner in North America. He's got about two

0:20:41.400 --> 0:20:46.760
<v Speaker 1>million acres of ranch land and uh fifteen ranches and

0:20:46.800 --> 0:20:51.840
<v Speaker 1>seven states that are all bison ranches, active working bison ranches,

0:20:52.720 --> 0:20:56.879
<v Speaker 1>and I believe he manages about fifty thousand head of

0:20:56.960 --> 0:21:02.160
<v Speaker 1>bison himself, himself, by hand himself. Well, Jane helped out

0:21:02.200 --> 0:21:05.399
<v Speaker 1>while they were together, and he opened his I'm sorry.

0:21:05.400 --> 0:21:07.640
<v Speaker 1>He purchased his first bison in seventy six and opened

0:21:07.680 --> 0:21:10.720
<v Speaker 1>his first bison ranch in seven, which makes me wonder

0:21:10.760 --> 0:21:13.160
<v Speaker 1>where did he keep that bison for eleven years? Did

0:21:13.200 --> 0:21:14.919
<v Speaker 1>he just like take it everywhere with him in the

0:21:14.960 --> 0:21:17.919
<v Speaker 1>backseat or he had plenty of land. There was no

0:21:17.960 --> 0:21:20.560
<v Speaker 1>shortage of space for that one bison. But I think

0:21:20.560 --> 0:21:22.280
<v Speaker 1>he to answer your question, he kept it at his

0:21:22.320 --> 0:21:25.840
<v Speaker 1>mansion in Buckhead, UM. If you want to learn more

0:21:25.840 --> 0:21:28.600
<v Speaker 1>about Ted Turner's um, he has many ongoing projects to

0:21:28.640 --> 0:21:31.680
<v Speaker 1>save the species. You can go to www dot t

0:21:31.800 --> 0:21:35.600
<v Speaker 1>E s F dot org and he's I mean a

0:21:35.600 --> 0:21:39.359
<v Speaker 1>lot of this is obviously for for raising bison to

0:21:39.480 --> 0:21:43.840
<v Speaker 1>sell two stock his Ted's Montana grills with fresh bison

0:21:43.920 --> 0:21:47.560
<v Speaker 1>steaks and burgers. But it still helps the conservation, well,

0:21:47.560 --> 0:21:52.520
<v Speaker 1>it does. I mean, whether they're free roaming or um

0:21:52.560 --> 0:21:56.280
<v Speaker 1>commercially raised. If you are just looking at the hard

0:21:56.359 --> 0:21:59.560
<v Speaker 1>numbers of bison populations in the US, they are not

0:21:59.680 --> 0:22:03.520
<v Speaker 1>in injured anymore. And it's because they're so delicious that

0:22:03.560 --> 0:22:06.480
<v Speaker 1>there is. That's the reason why they're not endangered. Well,

0:22:06.520 --> 0:22:08.879
<v Speaker 1>and one of the cool things about the bison is

0:22:09.040 --> 0:22:12.800
<v Speaker 1>it's it's across the board. The National Bison Association prohibits

0:22:12.840 --> 0:22:17.440
<v Speaker 1>the use of sub therapeutic antibiotics, growth hormones, and animal byproducts.

0:22:17.440 --> 0:22:20.159
<v Speaker 1>So it's not like, oh, this one calform says we

0:22:20.160 --> 0:22:23.439
<v Speaker 1>shouldn't inject them with hormones. It's all all bison in

0:22:23.480 --> 0:22:28.200
<v Speaker 1>the US, and they are very nutritional compared to cow beef.

0:22:28.280 --> 0:22:31.080
<v Speaker 1>They I don't need to be handled much. They almost

0:22:31.080 --> 0:22:36.600
<v Speaker 1>exclusively dine on grass. And if it's if it's um

0:22:36.680 --> 0:22:41.800
<v Speaker 1>unmanaged grass, that's it's organics, fully organic. Yeah. Absolutely. Uh,

0:22:42.240 --> 0:22:45.480
<v Speaker 1>let's talk nutrients. The proportions of protein, fat and minerals

0:22:45.520 --> 0:22:49.719
<v Speaker 1>and fatty acids to its caloric value are outstanding compared

0:22:49.760 --> 0:22:53.840
<v Speaker 1>to grass. Beef, I'm sorry, just beef period and um,

0:22:54.160 --> 0:22:57.120
<v Speaker 1>large concentrations of iron and a lot of essential fatty acids.

0:22:57.119 --> 0:22:59.800
<v Speaker 1>So people are up with bison. They're eating it a

0:23:00.080 --> 0:23:02.600
<v Speaker 1>lot more over the past decade. The numbers have really

0:23:02.640 --> 0:23:06.439
<v Speaker 1>risen dramatically. Um, do you eat it? Yeah, I've had it.

0:23:06.440 --> 0:23:08.720
<v Speaker 1>It's good stuff. I've had a bison burger. I didn't

0:23:08.760 --> 0:23:11.240
<v Speaker 1>you know. I've had bison steak at ted the Montana Grill,

0:23:11.320 --> 0:23:13.360
<v Speaker 1>which I should say, full of this closure, we own

0:23:13.440 --> 0:23:15.920
<v Speaker 1>no stock. What's however, and I've never eaten there. Oh

0:23:15.960 --> 0:23:18.280
<v Speaker 1>you should. It's cool. It's got to like the the

0:23:18.359 --> 0:23:22.680
<v Speaker 1>interior decor is like a turn of the last century

0:23:22.720 --> 0:23:26.800
<v Speaker 1>like Kansas restaurant. Yeah, it's very cool, like the tin

0:23:27.000 --> 0:23:29.919
<v Speaker 1>plate ceiling and all that stuff. Um, and yeah, the

0:23:29.960 --> 0:23:31.840
<v Speaker 1>bison steak is very good. Now, can you tell the

0:23:31.840 --> 0:23:34.840
<v Speaker 1>big taste difference. Yeah, really yeah, because I've had the

0:23:34.880 --> 0:23:37.160
<v Speaker 1>burger and I couldn't tell a huge difference. But you're

0:23:37.160 --> 0:23:40.280
<v Speaker 1>a steak guy. You like steaks, you immediately you can

0:23:40.320 --> 0:23:42.000
<v Speaker 1>look at it and tell a difference. But the taste

0:23:42.000 --> 0:23:43.880
<v Speaker 1>you can tell the difference as well too. I mean

0:23:43.920 --> 0:23:46.280
<v Speaker 1>it's not just like it's not like eating cat and

0:23:46.320 --> 0:23:49.000
<v Speaker 1>eating steak, but I mean you can tell a difference.

0:23:49.200 --> 0:23:55.119
<v Speaker 1>Well yeah, cat is gamey um, so chuck. Also, we

0:23:55.160 --> 0:23:58.280
<v Speaker 1>should say it's not just Ted Turner who's single handedly no,

0:23:59.240 --> 0:24:02.280
<v Speaker 1>keep saving the bison herds, because now there's what four

0:24:02.640 --> 0:24:05.160
<v Speaker 1>thousand commercial bison living in the US right now, Yeah,

0:24:05.160 --> 0:24:08.040
<v Speaker 1>a little more. Even that's just the US alone. Turners

0:24:08.080 --> 0:24:11.600
<v Speaker 1>got fifty thousand of those, which pretty substantial portion. Canada's

0:24:11.640 --> 0:24:14.440
<v Speaker 1>doing their part um. There is a group of eleven

0:24:14.480 --> 0:24:19.200
<v Speaker 1>tribes who get together in to form the Inner Tribal

0:24:19.200 --> 0:24:23.199
<v Speaker 1>Bison Cooperative. No, I'm sorry, fifty seven tribes that managed

0:24:23.200 --> 0:24:26.600
<v Speaker 1>fifteen thousand heads of bison collectively. And one of the

0:24:26.600 --> 0:24:29.280
<v Speaker 1>things that if you are if you manage a herd

0:24:29.280 --> 0:24:34.320
<v Speaker 1>of bison, whether for conservation or for deliciousness, you are

0:24:34.359 --> 0:24:38.359
<v Speaker 1>going to run into something called brucellosis. Which is not good.

0:24:39.280 --> 0:24:43.119
<v Speaker 1>It's a bacteria and it's called like another name for

0:24:43.160 --> 0:24:48.320
<v Speaker 1>it is contagious abortion. That's two great words to pair together.

0:24:49.560 --> 0:24:53.159
<v Speaker 1>So basically, brucellosis is a bacteria that you can that

0:24:53.359 --> 0:24:58.680
<v Speaker 1>ruminating animals, which is grazing animals um. They can pick

0:24:58.760 --> 0:25:03.560
<v Speaker 1>up pretty easily through the mouth um. The bacteria collects

0:25:03.640 --> 0:25:07.480
<v Speaker 1>in the reproductive organs. If you are if you have milk,

0:25:08.160 --> 0:25:11.040
<v Speaker 1>you're going to pass bad milk. If you're pregnant, you're

0:25:11.080 --> 0:25:13.720
<v Speaker 1>going to abort your fetus. And if you lick this

0:25:13.840 --> 0:25:19.320
<v Speaker 1>genital area, you've just contracted it. If you eat tainted meat,

0:25:19.440 --> 0:25:23.159
<v Speaker 1>tainted buffalo, you can catch it as well and you

0:25:23.160 --> 0:25:26.280
<v Speaker 1>get terrible, terrible flu like symptoms. But if you're a

0:25:26.280 --> 0:25:29.320
<v Speaker 1>bison or a reindeer or something like that, you are

0:25:29.480 --> 0:25:32.840
<v Speaker 1>in grave danger. If you have this bacteria can kill it.

0:25:32.840 --> 0:25:35.080
<v Speaker 1>You're pretty easy well, And that's certainly one of the

0:25:35.119 --> 0:25:37.680
<v Speaker 1>big reasons, because you know, with all these conservation efforts,

0:25:37.680 --> 0:25:39.600
<v Speaker 1>you might think, well, why are there still only half

0:25:39.640 --> 0:25:43.280
<v Speaker 1>a million. That's one of the biggest reasons. And sadly,

0:25:43.480 --> 0:25:48.440
<v Speaker 1>there are quarantine periods and when these infected bison roam

0:25:48.560 --> 0:25:53.159
<v Speaker 1>free like they're prone to do. They have have to

0:25:53.200 --> 0:25:56.479
<v Speaker 1>be put down. They get shot, like thirty seven hundred

0:25:56.480 --> 0:25:59.399
<v Speaker 1>of them. Uh in the past twenty years have then

0:25:59.520 --> 0:26:02.479
<v Speaker 1>have wanted outside of Yellowstone and they have to take

0:26:02.560 --> 0:26:06.760
<v Speaker 1>him down. Yeah if yeah, if you're one of the problems.

0:26:06.800 --> 0:26:09.359
<v Speaker 1>One of the big problems we're facing with getting the

0:26:09.359 --> 0:26:11.840
<v Speaker 1>bison population back on its feet is that we don't

0:26:11.840 --> 0:26:13.680
<v Speaker 1>have land like we used to. Well that's the other

0:26:14.240 --> 0:26:17.640
<v Speaker 1>So their original range, the original ecosystem are now developed

0:26:17.840 --> 0:26:20.000
<v Speaker 1>like a quickie mark. So it's like, you guys, just

0:26:20.040 --> 0:26:23.680
<v Speaker 1>stay in Yellowstone, so you you wandered outside of Yellowstone

0:26:23.680 --> 0:26:29.520
<v Speaker 1>and bang right. Um. Apparently, also even in Yellowstone sometimes

0:26:29.560 --> 0:26:33.280
<v Speaker 1>things converge, like they did in ninety seven. That winter

0:26:33.800 --> 0:26:37.080
<v Speaker 1>there's a particularly harsh winter, so a lot of the

0:26:37.680 --> 0:26:39.560
<v Speaker 1>a lot of the food supply was covered up with

0:26:39.640 --> 0:26:43.080
<v Speaker 1>snow and ice, and like thirt hundred bisons starved to

0:26:43.119 --> 0:26:45.560
<v Speaker 1>death in the park on top of a bunch that

0:26:45.600 --> 0:26:47.680
<v Speaker 1>had to be shot for wandering out too. So it's

0:26:47.680 --> 0:26:50.240
<v Speaker 1>a bad year for bison and Yellowstone well and not.

0:26:50.440 --> 0:26:53.840
<v Speaker 1>The final reason really is um, when you have a

0:26:53.920 --> 0:26:56.560
<v Speaker 1>smaller herds like this, there's gonna be more inbreeding and

0:26:56.600 --> 0:27:00.439
<v Speaker 1>inbreeding doesn't lead to a healthy population. Yeah, which is

0:27:00.680 --> 0:27:04.919
<v Speaker 1>one of the reasons why brucellosis is so rampant. You

0:27:05.000 --> 0:27:08.800
<v Speaker 1>have a narrower gene pool. So thank you to the

0:27:08.840 --> 0:27:13.560
<v Speaker 1>private system of all bison are on private land. Yes,

0:27:13.800 --> 0:27:17.840
<v Speaker 1>that's crazy. Yeah, like people coming together to single handedly

0:27:18.000 --> 0:27:21.400
<v Speaker 1>revived this species from the brink of extinction. So every

0:27:21.440 --> 0:27:24.400
<v Speaker 1>time you eat a bison burger, you're helping to conserve

0:27:24.480 --> 0:27:28.560
<v Speaker 1>the bison population. Inn't that weird? That is weird. I

0:27:28.800 --> 0:27:30.800
<v Speaker 1>got one more fact for you, Is it on a

0:27:30.880 --> 0:27:35.439
<v Speaker 1>high note? Uh? Sure? Do you like buffalo cheese and

0:27:35.440 --> 0:27:38.960
<v Speaker 1>stuff like that? I do like buffalo mozzarella. It's good stuff,

0:27:39.240 --> 0:27:42.680
<v Speaker 1>not from a bison. Apparently, any kind of buffalo product

0:27:42.680 --> 0:27:47.960
<v Speaker 1>like that milk and cheese is from the the water buffalo. Cool.

0:27:48.200 --> 0:27:52.399
<v Speaker 1>And the reason why bison are not commercially milked is

0:27:52.440 --> 0:27:57.280
<v Speaker 1>because the ladies have little teets, really tiny little teats

0:27:57.320 --> 0:28:00.399
<v Speaker 1>that are very small, and they're not great for for

0:28:00.520 --> 0:28:06.800
<v Speaker 1>milking and um. Yeah, so they don't adapt well to

0:28:06.920 --> 0:28:09.600
<v Speaker 1>that kind of thing. The ladies are like hands off fellas. Huh.

0:28:10.400 --> 0:28:12.800
<v Speaker 1>I did not know that. I can tell you, chuck.

0:28:13.520 --> 0:28:17.680
<v Speaker 1>Even having been a beverly bison, I know today, as

0:28:17.680 --> 0:28:21.119
<v Speaker 1>of today, more than I ever have before about bison

0:28:21.240 --> 0:28:24.520
<v Speaker 1>in general. Yeah, me too, and it's bison's plural. We

0:28:24.560 --> 0:28:26.760
<v Speaker 1>should go free that. Uh, we should go free that

0:28:26.800 --> 0:28:29.880
<v Speaker 1>bison and the game ranch. Do you want to Yeah,

0:28:29.960 --> 0:28:33.360
<v Speaker 1>we should just send it down seventy eight East. Well,

0:28:33.400 --> 0:28:35.280
<v Speaker 1>that's one reason why we're down. Well, I mean it

0:28:35.280 --> 0:28:39.000
<v Speaker 1>would be a descent. Somebody shoot it because they behave radically.

0:28:39.320 --> 0:28:41.960
<v Speaker 1>But apparently one last thing. You can tell how a

0:28:42.000 --> 0:28:44.720
<v Speaker 1>bison's feeling based on his tail. If his tail is

0:28:44.800 --> 0:28:49.160
<v Speaker 1>dangling between his legs, he's calm. If it's moving, he's alert.

0:28:49.280 --> 0:28:53.440
<v Speaker 1>He's maybe watching you. If it's pointing straight out or up,

0:28:53.600 --> 0:28:56.880
<v Speaker 1>get out of town. Yeah, because we're going to charge.

0:28:58.280 --> 0:29:00.920
<v Speaker 1>Well that's pretty cool. Yeah. So that's it for bison,

0:29:01.080 --> 0:29:04.320
<v Speaker 1>and um again, hats off to everybody who's eating bison

0:29:04.400 --> 0:29:07.760
<v Speaker 1>burgers because you are keeping the bison population in check.

0:29:08.000 --> 0:29:10.840
<v Speaker 1>Ted Turner, thank you, sir. I commend you. I had

0:29:10.920 --> 0:29:13.680
<v Speaker 1>raised my cutty sark to you. I saw him at

0:29:13.720 --> 0:29:16.440
<v Speaker 1>at the Willie Nelson concert a few years ago. You did, yeah,

0:29:16.480 --> 0:29:19.080
<v Speaker 1>and I wanted to tackle him and say thank you.

0:29:19.480 --> 0:29:22.000
<v Speaker 1>He probably would have liked that. He was a big

0:29:22.040 --> 0:29:24.400
<v Speaker 1>part of my childhood being from Atlanta, Like he can't

0:29:24.400 --> 0:29:26.960
<v Speaker 1>be from Atlanta in the seventies and all right, not

0:29:27.080 --> 0:29:30.120
<v Speaker 1>think a lot of Ted Turner. Yeah, I'm sure he was,

0:29:30.160 --> 0:29:33.960
<v Speaker 1>like your secret saying a one year. Of course, if

0:29:33.960 --> 0:29:37.120
<v Speaker 1>you want to know more about bison and extinction and

0:29:37.600 --> 0:29:42.000
<v Speaker 1>uh bison burgers and brucellosis, you've got all this stuff

0:29:42.240 --> 0:29:47.080
<v Speaker 1>packed into one great article called what brought Bison Back

0:29:47.240 --> 0:29:51.840
<v Speaker 1>from the Brink of Extinction? You can just put a

0:29:51.880 --> 0:29:54.880
<v Speaker 1>bison extinction in the search bart how stuff works? Dot

0:29:54.880 --> 0:29:57.400
<v Speaker 1>comment should bring up this article? And I think I

0:29:57.440 --> 0:30:01.440
<v Speaker 1>said search bar, did I not? Let's just the cats

0:30:01.440 --> 0:30:04.200
<v Speaker 1>out of the bag already. Okay, John Hodgeman is sitting

0:30:04.320 --> 0:30:05.920
<v Speaker 1>right here. We're not going to do listen to mail.

0:30:06.200 --> 0:30:09.240
<v Speaker 1>Sorry listeners. Is the fourth time I am putting my

0:30:09.240 --> 0:30:11.200
<v Speaker 1>foot down. This is the last time, at least for

0:30:11.280 --> 0:30:13.600
<v Speaker 1>this series. This has been going on for two weeks.

0:30:14.160 --> 0:30:16.880
<v Speaker 1>It's fine, this is the last time. Okay, So this

0:30:17.000 --> 0:30:18.960
<v Speaker 1>is four of four. Yeah, maybe we should treat you

0:30:18.960 --> 0:30:21.280
<v Speaker 1>a little more regally then. This is four of four?

0:30:21.320 --> 0:30:27.720
<v Speaker 1>Can we keep some coronets? Excellent? Yeah, so, Mr Hodgeman,

0:30:27.720 --> 0:30:30.160
<v Speaker 1>thank you very much for coming pushing me right out

0:30:30.200 --> 0:30:32.160
<v Speaker 1>the door. Josh, thank you very much for coming. And

0:30:32.160 --> 0:30:35.320
<v Speaker 1>I'm a hologram. I'm not even here pushing through you

0:30:35.640 --> 0:30:38.680
<v Speaker 1>right now. Hodgeman Actual is in St. Louis, Missouri Gateway

0:30:38.680 --> 0:30:42.360
<v Speaker 1>to the West, getting ready to perform tonight on the

0:30:42.360 --> 0:30:45.880
<v Speaker 1>book Tour live at Top to St. Louis Arch Yeah, well, no,

0:30:45.920 --> 0:30:48.720
<v Speaker 1>not exactly. Where is the locale again? I had here

0:30:48.760 --> 0:30:52.160
<v Speaker 1>just a second ago. It was at the bookstore there

0:30:52.320 --> 0:30:54.440
<v Speaker 1>last like laugh a minute, bookstore, I think is what

0:30:54.480 --> 0:30:56.480
<v Speaker 1>I was calling. I think it was the Mad Art Gallery.

0:30:56.640 --> 0:30:59.000
<v Speaker 1>That's the same same thing, laugh a minute, seven pm,

0:30:59.040 --> 0:31:01.720
<v Speaker 1>this very evening, November three. Do you want to say

0:31:01.760 --> 0:31:04.840
<v Speaker 1>the name again? The Mad Art Gallery? Seven pm, this

0:31:04.960 --> 0:31:09.680
<v Speaker 1>very evening, November three. Hodgeman Actual is presenting material from

0:31:09.680 --> 0:31:13.880
<v Speaker 1>his book that is all with special guest insert name here.

0:31:15.840 --> 0:31:19.520
<v Speaker 1>That's excellent. I can't believe we got that guy or gal. Yeah,

0:31:19.800 --> 0:31:23.200
<v Speaker 1>good going so so No, I'm just a holographic representation

0:31:23.240 --> 0:31:25.400
<v Speaker 1>of myself here again to say hello to you guys. Well,

0:31:25.440 --> 0:31:28.520
<v Speaker 1>thank you because because I'm a I'm a big fan

0:31:29.280 --> 0:31:31.600
<v Speaker 1>and I'm a deranged millionaire who has a hologram of himself,

0:31:31.680 --> 0:31:34.440
<v Speaker 1>and you can send a favorite podcast. Why not exactly.

0:31:34.480 --> 0:31:36.760
<v Speaker 1>And that's the thing about Hodgment, like even even getting

0:31:37.120 --> 0:31:40.360
<v Speaker 1>the hologram of him, is you know more than you

0:31:40.400 --> 0:31:42.880
<v Speaker 1>could possibly want with anybody else. I agree with you.

0:31:44.160 --> 0:31:46.520
<v Speaker 1>As the hologram, I can say, I'm actually a little better.

0:31:47.040 --> 0:31:51.400
<v Speaker 1>Oh really, we noticed, we noticed last time. I'm not

0:31:51.440 --> 0:31:57.920
<v Speaker 1>as flatulent. We noticed due to my holographic nature. Although

0:31:57.920 --> 0:31:59.800
<v Speaker 1>you still make the sounds. It's just weird. It's that

0:32:00.160 --> 0:32:03.280
<v Speaker 1>the pros But I am I am. I'm a simulated

0:32:03.280 --> 0:32:06.880
<v Speaker 1>program designed to interact with real world stimulus in a

0:32:06.880 --> 0:32:12.640
<v Speaker 1>realistic manner. Eat a Hamburger sandwich that moves you one

0:32:12.640 --> 0:32:16.800
<v Speaker 1>of your favorite, one of your famous Atlanta and Hamburger sandwiches. So, John,

0:32:16.840 --> 0:32:18.880
<v Speaker 1>you wrote a book. It's called That is All. It

0:32:18.960 --> 0:32:23.160
<v Speaker 1>is the third in your series explaining the world. It

0:32:23.280 --> 0:32:25.560
<v Speaker 1>is my complete book of World Knowledge. Is like my

0:32:25.600 --> 0:32:33.080
<v Speaker 1>previous two books, a collection of fascinating trivia, historical tidbits,

0:32:33.080 --> 0:32:35.760
<v Speaker 1>and amazing true facts, all of which made up by me.

0:32:37.280 --> 0:32:41.680
<v Speaker 1>This being the last in the series of complete world Knowledge,

0:32:41.680 --> 0:32:46.000
<v Speaker 1>indeed the final world Knowledge, dealing with subjects as diverse

0:32:46.040 --> 0:32:49.440
<v Speaker 1>as travel and ghosts and magic, tricks and wine and sports.

0:32:49.440 --> 0:32:51.160
<v Speaker 1>In the end of the world, and it is called

0:32:51.200 --> 0:32:53.240
<v Speaker 1>that is All, and we've covered a lot of those

0:32:53.320 --> 0:32:55.360
<v Speaker 1>in the podcast too, So this is almost I guess

0:32:55.400 --> 0:32:59.920
<v Speaker 1>you would say companion piece the last time you would. Yeah, no, Yeah,

0:33:00.040 --> 0:33:02.320
<v Speaker 1>that's right. It's also my life's work. But thank you.

0:33:03.720 --> 0:33:07.680
<v Speaker 1>Last week you accused me of taking Sorry, last week,

0:33:07.760 --> 0:33:14.960
<v Speaker 1>Chuck accused men over over let's say, over liberal inspiration

0:33:15.080 --> 0:33:19.479
<v Speaker 1>from the Stuff you Should Know podcast after I had

0:33:19.560 --> 0:33:22.960
<v Speaker 1>very graciously pointed out that a huge section of my

0:33:23.000 --> 0:33:27.400
<v Speaker 1>book regarding noodling was an homage to your very podcast,

0:33:27.480 --> 0:33:30.840
<v Speaker 1>and then I took that nice gesture and I stomped

0:33:30.840 --> 0:33:34.400
<v Speaker 1>on it. But I will tell you one thing. I

0:33:34.440 --> 0:33:41.080
<v Speaker 1>did download one of your podcasts specifically as research for

0:33:41.120 --> 0:33:46.640
<v Speaker 1>the book That is all Necronomicon. That was a good

0:33:46.640 --> 0:33:50.560
<v Speaker 1>one with co host Jonathan Stricklin's, by the way, just

0:33:50.640 --> 0:33:54.000
<v Speaker 1>beat himself because we mentioned him in reference to you.

0:33:54.800 --> 0:33:58.160
<v Speaker 1>What just happened just now? Yes, my other hologram is

0:33:58.160 --> 0:34:01.400
<v Speaker 1>cleaning that up this week. That is your full service.

0:34:01.640 --> 0:34:04.320
<v Speaker 1>There are many holograms wandering the halls right now. That's

0:34:04.360 --> 0:34:08.600
<v Speaker 1>part of a new security system. How stuff works is considering. So, John,

0:34:08.600 --> 0:34:11.280
<v Speaker 1>is it true that in this book you explain things

0:34:11.360 --> 0:34:15.120
<v Speaker 1>like the thick fish, what's the thick fish? And the

0:34:15.120 --> 0:34:18.040
<v Speaker 1>bowl of brown? Oh? Yes, that's right. Well that's not

0:34:18.120 --> 0:34:20.719
<v Speaker 1>part of my You know, you know my book better

0:34:20.719 --> 0:34:23.200
<v Speaker 1>than I do. Is it true that you explain the

0:34:23.280 --> 0:34:26.600
<v Speaker 1>superiority of the year nine one as birth year, which

0:34:26.640 --> 0:34:30.760
<v Speaker 1>we both share? That's true? What's going on? Yes? True?

0:34:31.239 --> 0:34:35.560
<v Speaker 1>Is it true that you explain the benefits and taboos

0:34:35.640 --> 0:34:40.719
<v Speaker 1>at sea while cruising? That is so. Is it true John,

0:34:40.760 --> 0:34:44.000
<v Speaker 1>that there is a table in your book about disgusting

0:34:44.040 --> 0:34:47.759
<v Speaker 1>regional sodas? That is true? Would you be kind enough

0:34:47.800 --> 0:34:49.600
<v Speaker 1>to read some of those sodas? I feel like I'm

0:34:49.640 --> 0:34:54.160
<v Speaker 1>being interrogated. Yes, I have my own copy of the Okay,

0:34:54.600 --> 0:35:00.319
<v Speaker 1>oh well you haven't open there? The thick A thick

0:35:00.360 --> 0:35:04.040
<v Speaker 1>fish and the bowl of brown? What's the thick fish? Fish?

0:35:04.080 --> 0:35:09.239
<v Speaker 1>The bowl of brown? The the Patagonian toothfish wine, the

0:35:09.280 --> 0:35:11.960
<v Speaker 1>furry forms. These are some of the funny things that

0:35:12.000 --> 0:35:14.520
<v Speaker 1>you ingest in your book. Those are just words, but

0:35:14.640 --> 0:35:19.080
<v Speaker 1>you're streaming together. You would think that's my job to

0:35:19.120 --> 0:35:23.400
<v Speaker 1>string those words together. Bowl of brown comes from a

0:35:23.440 --> 0:35:27.680
<v Speaker 1>section of my book on rose wine, because rose wine

0:35:27.719 --> 0:35:30.480
<v Speaker 1>is neither white nor red. I love the wine chapter,

0:35:30.760 --> 0:35:33.560
<v Speaker 1>Thank you very much. It's something that I previously knew

0:35:33.600 --> 0:35:37.640
<v Speaker 1>nothing about because I thought that wine was so complex

0:35:37.680 --> 0:35:42.920
<v Speaker 1>and multilayered uh and and um and his stork that

0:35:43.000 --> 0:35:47.120
<v Speaker 1>it could only be enjoyed by But apparently no simple

0:35:47.360 --> 0:35:49.480
<v Speaker 1>just grape juice all you need to make its scrape

0:35:49.560 --> 0:35:55.400
<v Speaker 1>juice human feet in time. Yeah, own yeast. But but

0:35:55.480 --> 0:35:58.560
<v Speaker 1>I point out that because rose is neither white nor red,

0:35:59.320 --> 0:36:03.919
<v Speaker 1>it is best haired with ambiguous foods like the thick fish.

0:36:04.160 --> 0:36:13.680
<v Speaker 1>Like thick fish, scrod, brown brown, mystery meat. That's a rose.

0:36:14.000 --> 0:36:17.320
<v Speaker 1>I like rose like. I mean it, quite honestly. I

0:36:17.400 --> 0:36:19.759
<v Speaker 1>like rose. I like sparkling rose as well. I know it.

0:36:20.360 --> 0:36:24.800
<v Speaker 1>You know you can. You can tolerate ambiguity. Some of

0:36:24.920 --> 0:36:26.640
<v Speaker 1>us can't. Like. I'm not the least bit certain how

0:36:26.719 --> 0:36:28.880
<v Speaker 1>either of you two feel about. We like things that

0:36:28.960 --> 0:36:30.640
<v Speaker 1>you know, we like things black or white, so we

0:36:30.760 --> 0:36:32.840
<v Speaker 1>drink either white wine or black wine. You know what

0:36:32.920 --> 0:36:36.719
<v Speaker 1>I mean, We'll mix them up. I don't remember what

0:36:36.760 --> 0:36:39.120
<v Speaker 1>all those other words you were talking about were pretty

0:36:39.160 --> 0:36:42.439
<v Speaker 1>much it you were going to talk about. But they're

0:36:42.440 --> 0:36:47.000
<v Speaker 1>also non alcoholic drinks that you can drink, And there

0:36:47.040 --> 0:36:49.759
<v Speaker 1>are still regional sodas all over this country that are

0:36:49.800 --> 0:36:54.360
<v Speaker 1>not distributed to the rest of the world. Um and

0:36:54.680 --> 0:36:58.800
<v Speaker 1>and you might enjoy going into a local uh you know,

0:36:58.920 --> 0:37:01.719
<v Speaker 1>on a road trip, go into a little trading post

0:37:01.800 --> 0:37:06.360
<v Speaker 1>there and reaching behind the disgusting handmade sandwiches and pulling

0:37:06.400 --> 0:37:10.759
<v Speaker 1>out one of these disgusting regional sodas to enjoy. So,

0:37:11.000 --> 0:37:15.520
<v Speaker 1>for example, there's ties Gumption brand brain drizzle, which you

0:37:15.600 --> 0:37:19.840
<v Speaker 1>can only get in Maine, Vermont. It's uh, you know.

0:37:20.000 --> 0:37:23.640
<v Speaker 1>Sodas were originally served in pharmacies. That's why there in

0:37:23.680 --> 0:37:25.400
<v Speaker 1>parts of the country is still called tonic. In New

0:37:25.440 --> 0:37:27.920
<v Speaker 1>England they're still called tonic because they were medicine. There

0:37:27.960 --> 0:37:32.839
<v Speaker 1>were ways of delivering medicine and and in particular sort

0:37:32.880 --> 0:37:36.240
<v Speaker 1>of like herbal remedies and nerve tonics and cocaine phizzics.

0:37:36.320 --> 0:37:38.640
<v Speaker 1>These are what they would serve. Cocaine pizzics were invented

0:37:38.680 --> 0:37:40.840
<v Speaker 1>in this very city, in this very city of Atlanta.

0:37:40.880 --> 0:37:47.240
<v Speaker 1>The cocaine fish, who later became Coca Cola. Ties Gumption

0:37:47.320 --> 0:37:49.200
<v Speaker 1>brand brain Drizzle was the only one of the great

0:37:49.200 --> 0:37:55.280
<v Speaker 1>old sodas to actually contain cerebrospinal flute. Once incredibly popular

0:37:55.320 --> 0:37:59.000
<v Speaker 1>throughout the Eastern Seaboard, for its invigorating flavor and hallucinatory properties.

0:37:59.800 --> 0:38:02.200
<v Speaker 1>It is now primarily found only in northern New England,

0:38:02.880 --> 0:38:05.440
<v Speaker 1>where it is still made using the company's own secret recipe,

0:38:05.480 --> 0:38:12.920
<v Speaker 1>including fluid from patient thirty one unnamed Hydrocephalic Patients Secret

0:38:12.960 --> 0:38:16.160
<v Speaker 1>Hospital and Brattleboro, Vermont. What's the the other flavor profile?

0:38:16.239 --> 0:38:24.120
<v Speaker 1>And that one yes bitter medicinal brainy sugary. You know Brattleburg,

0:38:24.239 --> 0:38:28.360
<v Speaker 1>Vermont as a town very near to my retreat in

0:38:28.400 --> 0:38:33.319
<v Speaker 1>Internetlas Hills, western Massachusetts. Um, and it's a wonderful town.

0:38:33.320 --> 0:38:35.640
<v Speaker 1>I had a hard time during Hurricane Irene. There was

0:38:35.640 --> 0:38:38.480
<v Speaker 1>a lot of flooding in Brattleboro, So I hate to

0:38:38.560 --> 0:38:39.759
<v Speaker 1>make fun of it. Do you know what I mean?

0:38:39.840 --> 0:38:42.200
<v Speaker 1>That they they're all dried out. Now you should go

0:38:42.320 --> 0:38:45.560
<v Speaker 1>up there, Go visit the Latchus Theater, go eat at fireworks,

0:38:46.360 --> 0:38:50.240
<v Speaker 1>go to the retreat farm and petting zoo. It's wonderful

0:38:50.280 --> 0:38:54.520
<v Speaker 1>place to go. But did you know the Brattleboro, Vermont

0:38:54.560 --> 0:38:59.000
<v Speaker 1>speaking of ties brain drizzle? But that that the that

0:38:59.120 --> 0:39:01.719
<v Speaker 1>the hit wraps all from two thousand seven Sipping mice

0:39:01.840 --> 0:39:06.520
<v Speaker 1>A Drizzle is now synonymous with the musical subgenre known

0:39:06.560 --> 0:39:11.360
<v Speaker 1>as brattle Brattleboro, Vermont, white person with dreadlocks wrap. That

0:39:11.520 --> 0:39:17.120
<v Speaker 1>whole subculture, the whole subculture started up there, and uh

0:39:18.760 --> 0:39:23.440
<v Speaker 1>and that song. Sipping on Massa drizzle also introduced America

0:39:23.480 --> 0:39:26.880
<v Speaker 1>to the controversial drink known as si drizzle, which is

0:39:26.960 --> 0:39:32.000
<v Speaker 1>ties brain drizzle mixed with apricot brandy about a hundred tablets,

0:39:32.080 --> 0:39:38.040
<v Speaker 1>suda fed crushed up and maple syrup and and and

0:39:38.200 --> 0:39:40.319
<v Speaker 1>to enjoy it, you serve it in a Solo brand

0:39:40.360 --> 0:39:44.719
<v Speaker 1>plastic cup with a viking and dusted rim. That's great.

0:39:45.080 --> 0:39:46.279
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if we need to go in any

0:39:46.360 --> 0:39:48.839
<v Speaker 1>into any other regional Sodus, but there are a lot

0:39:48.920 --> 0:39:52.360
<v Speaker 1>of them. Uh. Well, the the only other one in

0:39:52.800 --> 0:39:57.279
<v Speaker 1>the Denver, Colorado area and the Rockies. You can still

0:39:57.320 --> 0:40:04.800
<v Speaker 1>get Chickoh soda and it's roast chicken flavored. Uh and

0:40:05.040 --> 0:40:08.200
<v Speaker 1>it's the only remaining product in the in the in

0:40:08.280 --> 0:40:12.399
<v Speaker 1>the company in the line from Savory Meat Soda Corp.

0:40:13.320 --> 0:40:18.840
<v Speaker 1>Because up up until up until not only could you

0:40:18.920 --> 0:40:24.680
<v Speaker 1>get Chicko, you could also get porko and steak and eggsham.

0:40:25.600 --> 0:40:30.520
<v Speaker 1>Those are also available, but now just Chicko and then

0:40:30.680 --> 0:40:35.480
<v Speaker 1>chum and then chum wine based on cheer wine. Right.

0:40:36.560 --> 0:40:38.480
<v Speaker 1>It was one of many rip offs of North Carolina's

0:40:38.480 --> 0:40:43.600
<v Speaker 1>famous cheer wine. But this one, this one, unlike cheer wine,

0:40:43.640 --> 0:40:45.920
<v Speaker 1>this one has its flavor profile of sweet cherry, bubble

0:40:45.920 --> 0:40:50.000
<v Speaker 1>gum and fish blood chum wine. It's it's motto was

0:40:50.200 --> 0:40:54.000
<v Speaker 1>the one, the one to drink while spreading chump. It

0:40:54.120 --> 0:40:59.200
<v Speaker 1>was for fishing for fisher persons, and that that was

0:40:59.320 --> 0:41:03.680
<v Speaker 1>that little of delight was read directly from the book.

0:41:03.719 --> 0:41:06.560
<v Speaker 1>That is all. That is all, John Um. That is

0:41:06.600 --> 0:41:10.040
<v Speaker 1>a hardcover book. It is a usually issue. It is

0:41:10.120 --> 0:41:13.880
<v Speaker 1>It is the first edition hardcover book in pure black

0:41:14.800 --> 0:41:18.880
<v Speaker 1>and white. No light can escape from that. It is.

0:41:19.239 --> 0:41:22.360
<v Speaker 1>It is the black hole of hardcover books. It is absorbing,

0:41:23.200 --> 0:41:25.480
<v Speaker 1>It is absorbing every light ray that comes at it.

0:41:26.200 --> 0:41:32.120
<v Speaker 1>It is a dark, stark tablet reflecting um and monolithic,

0:41:32.280 --> 0:41:36.880
<v Speaker 1>indeed reflecting the end of this series, the end of

0:41:38.200 --> 0:41:40.239
<v Speaker 1>human civilization and time as we know it in two

0:41:40.280 --> 0:41:43.680
<v Speaker 1>hasnt twelve, and now that I've turned forty, the end

0:41:43.719 --> 0:41:47.920
<v Speaker 1>of my life so more tragically, what's your life's work? Yes,

0:41:48.080 --> 0:41:51.719
<v Speaker 1>it is actually, you know, I'm sorry to put it

0:41:51.760 --> 0:41:54.920
<v Speaker 1>in such stark terms, but I mean, you know, it

0:41:55.080 --> 0:42:01.399
<v Speaker 1>is the purest unfiltered expression of my adult brain. And uh,

0:42:01.880 --> 0:42:05.120
<v Speaker 1>and I hope very much the people will. I mean, look,

0:42:05.160 --> 0:42:07.439
<v Speaker 1>we live in it. We live in a culture where

0:42:07.520 --> 0:42:11.279
<v Speaker 1>people are getting their their fake facts and they're made

0:42:11.360 --> 0:42:14.879
<v Speaker 1>up trivia, and they're and they're invented truths for free

0:42:14.960 --> 0:42:16.880
<v Speaker 1>on the news every night. Do you know what I mean?

0:42:17.680 --> 0:42:19.160
<v Speaker 1>Though you may ask why should I go out and

0:42:19.239 --> 0:42:22.320
<v Speaker 1>buy a hardcover copy of a book? Uh full of it?

0:42:22.520 --> 0:42:24.960
<v Speaker 1>And you know that is a question only you can answer.

0:42:25.040 --> 0:42:27.040
<v Speaker 1>All I can tell you is this is truly my

0:42:27.120 --> 0:42:29.080
<v Speaker 1>life's work. And I hope and I enjoy sharing it

0:42:29.120 --> 0:42:31.040
<v Speaker 1>with you, and I hope you enjoy it well as such.

0:42:31.160 --> 0:42:34.880
<v Speaker 1>I mean, you're you're curating it. This kind of experience,

0:42:34.920 --> 0:42:38.080
<v Speaker 1>this release is not just like Hodgeman dropped a book.

0:42:38.280 --> 0:42:41.680
<v Speaker 1>Hodgeman dropped a book. It's a great book. This is

0:42:41.719 --> 0:42:45.600
<v Speaker 1>not my tumbler book. Um there you're touring with it.

0:42:45.920 --> 0:42:49.080
<v Speaker 1>I am starting well, I'm in St. Louis. I'm in St.

0:42:49.120 --> 0:42:52.400
<v Speaker 1>Louis and right uh, and then tomorrow I will be

0:42:52.440 --> 0:42:56.399
<v Speaker 1>in Los Angeles, California at the November four the Largo

0:42:56.520 --> 0:43:00.920
<v Speaker 1>Theater with Paul F. Tompkins. That's a wonderful place. And

0:43:01.040 --> 0:43:03.560
<v Speaker 1>then I will be in Portland on Sunday the seventh

0:43:04.640 --> 0:43:08.239
<v Speaker 1>with John Roderick uh and uh and then we we

0:43:08.400 --> 0:43:10.719
<v Speaker 1>traveled directly up to Seattle after that to be at

0:43:10.760 --> 0:43:14.560
<v Speaker 1>town Hall again with John Roderick and other special guests

0:43:14.560 --> 0:43:16.840
<v Speaker 1>will join me later on the tour. John will be singing,

0:43:17.000 --> 0:43:18.640
<v Speaker 1>and there will be singing songs. You will not just

0:43:18.760 --> 0:43:21.000
<v Speaker 1>be We're going to join him on ukulele and vocals.

0:43:21.080 --> 0:43:24.399
<v Speaker 1>There will be ukulele playing for sure, jumping fleet playing.

0:43:25.000 --> 0:43:29.279
<v Speaker 1>John is going to on stage teach a kid to read.

0:43:29.880 --> 0:43:33.359
<v Speaker 1>That's right, because this isn't a sham, It's not it's

0:43:33.400 --> 0:43:36.359
<v Speaker 1>not a carnival act. I will find an oliterate child

0:43:37.280 --> 0:43:39.840
<v Speaker 1>in each town and teach them to read the words.

0:43:39.960 --> 0:43:42.600
<v Speaker 1>That is all. And it's gonna be heartbreaking. It's going

0:43:42.640 --> 0:43:44.919
<v Speaker 1>to be the last part isn't true. But I will

0:43:44.960 --> 0:43:47.080
<v Speaker 1>be joined by other special guests who may or may

0:43:47.160 --> 0:43:49.160
<v Speaker 1>not be literate throughout the tour and it will be

0:43:49.239 --> 0:43:50.800
<v Speaker 1>going on through the sixteenth. And if you want to

0:43:50.840 --> 0:43:53.680
<v Speaker 1>find out where I am, and and if you want

0:43:53.680 --> 0:43:56.399
<v Speaker 1>to come and see see me present material from the book,

0:43:57.120 --> 0:43:59.520
<v Speaker 1>you can go to areas of my expertise dot com

0:44:00.600 --> 0:44:02.880
<v Speaker 1>and and and visit there. You will have to buy

0:44:02.920 --> 0:44:04.640
<v Speaker 1>a ticket for the book, but the cost of the

0:44:04.680 --> 0:44:06.960
<v Speaker 1>ticket includes a copy of the book. So that's a

0:44:06.960 --> 0:44:09.440
<v Speaker 1>pretty good deal. Yeah, I think. And you'll you'll be

0:44:09.480 --> 0:44:13.680
<v Speaker 1>signing some too, and you'll sign, I will sign. I

0:44:13.719 --> 0:44:17.160
<v Speaker 1>will sign every I will sign every book. And uh,

0:44:17.480 --> 0:44:20.600
<v Speaker 1>you're one of those guys, aren't like you? Yes, you

0:44:20.719 --> 0:44:23.080
<v Speaker 1>see to it that everybody who's standing in line gets

0:44:23.120 --> 0:44:26.200
<v Speaker 1>the gets the signature. I want Legionnaire's disease. I'm gonna

0:44:26.239 --> 0:44:31.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna shake everyone's hand, come on, um and if

0:44:31.520 --> 0:44:33.640
<v Speaker 1>if I can pull it together, guys, And I hate

0:44:33.680 --> 0:44:35.640
<v Speaker 1>to make promises, but you know, sometimes you got to

0:44:35.680 --> 0:44:39.719
<v Speaker 1>say something publicly to make yourself do it. I'm trying

0:44:39.760 --> 0:44:42.359
<v Speaker 1>to find maybe you guys can help me. We probably can't.

0:44:42.520 --> 0:44:45.959
<v Speaker 1>Is a company that will make me some custom mini

0:44:46.000 --> 0:44:49.120
<v Speaker 1>packets of mayonnaise so that I can give people who

0:44:49.200 --> 0:44:54.480
<v Speaker 1>come to the event free premium premium which is samples

0:44:54.680 --> 0:45:00.880
<v Speaker 1>of John hodgmons uh Ragnarok Proof survival mannaise. Awesome because

0:45:01.200 --> 0:45:04.680
<v Speaker 1>aside from your own urine, mayonnaise is going to be

0:45:04.800 --> 0:45:09.399
<v Speaker 1>the thing that you need most after the feces comes

0:45:09.440 --> 0:45:12.480
<v Speaker 1>down and civilization is over. Well, one thing you can

0:45:12.520 --> 0:45:15.799
<v Speaker 1>do is lubricate small engines with mayonnaise. With mayonnaise, Yeah,

0:45:15.880 --> 0:45:17.839
<v Speaker 1>that's just one of the uses you can You can

0:45:18.000 --> 0:45:21.080
<v Speaker 1>use it as a as a cleanser, a hair cleanser,

0:45:21.200 --> 0:45:24.200
<v Speaker 1>and it's a wonderful conditioner. You can use it to

0:45:24.280 --> 0:45:28.960
<v Speaker 1>lubricate small engines. Uh. You can take garbage bags and

0:45:29.080 --> 0:45:30.960
<v Speaker 1>spread them out on the lawn and put mayonnaise all

0:45:31.000 --> 0:45:32.920
<v Speaker 1>over them. Guess what, you just made a slip and

0:45:32.960 --> 0:45:35.640
<v Speaker 1>slide in a time when there is no more running water.

0:45:36.160 --> 0:45:39.000
<v Speaker 1>Your kids can enjoy that you leave those garbage bags

0:45:39.000 --> 0:45:41.759
<v Speaker 1>out in the sun for a while. Guess what, You've

0:45:41.800 --> 0:45:45.040
<v Speaker 1>just made yourself a handy poison well and during after

0:45:45.120 --> 0:45:47.359
<v Speaker 1>the super collapse, John, you also make a good point

0:45:47.400 --> 0:45:51.640
<v Speaker 1>in the book that the currency could very well be

0:45:51.760 --> 0:45:54.279
<v Speaker 1>the beef jerky dollar. Oh, it's definitely going to be

0:45:54.320 --> 0:45:56.799
<v Speaker 1>the beef You have a handy table of what one

0:45:56.880 --> 0:46:01.680
<v Speaker 1>beef jerky dollar equals. Yeah, and I think my where

0:46:01.719 --> 0:46:04.120
<v Speaker 1>I would spend my beef turkey dollar if I had one,

0:46:04.160 --> 0:46:06.200
<v Speaker 1>would be the I think seven point five hours of

0:46:06.840 --> 0:46:12.600
<v Speaker 1>human human contact was that it, Yes, without murder at

0:46:12.640 --> 0:46:16.200
<v Speaker 1>the end, without being cannibalized at the end. You have

0:46:16.280 --> 0:46:18.400
<v Speaker 1>to recall any other things A beef turkey dollar will

0:46:18.440 --> 0:46:21.400
<v Speaker 1>get you after the super collapse. Well no, but if

0:46:21.480 --> 0:46:23.680
<v Speaker 1>you're interested listener, you can take a look at my book.

0:46:23.760 --> 0:46:26.040
<v Speaker 1>That is all. It's one of my favorite parts, which

0:46:26.120 --> 0:46:28.680
<v Speaker 1>really I mean also it's it's let's just come out

0:46:28.680 --> 0:46:30.239
<v Speaker 1>and say it. It is something of a if not

0:46:30.400 --> 0:46:33.560
<v Speaker 1>a survival guide. There's some survival to it, but also

0:46:33.680 --> 0:46:37.000
<v Speaker 1>like a pretty like a beat by beat prophecy of

0:46:37.080 --> 0:46:39.920
<v Speaker 1>what's going to be going down in twelve. If you

0:46:40.160 --> 0:46:45.040
<v Speaker 1>if you accept the hard made up fact that the

0:46:45.160 --> 0:46:48.000
<v Speaker 1>Mayan Long Count calendar ends on December twenty first, two

0:46:48.000 --> 0:46:51.320
<v Speaker 1>thousand twelve, thus bringing an end to human civilization and

0:46:51.400 --> 0:46:53.239
<v Speaker 1>time as we know it, in the end of the world,

0:46:54.400 --> 0:46:56.440
<v Speaker 1>then you will find in my book A Day by

0:46:56.600 --> 0:47:01.080
<v Speaker 1>Day Today in Ragnarok, page of day calendar running down

0:47:01.160 --> 0:47:05.239
<v Speaker 1>for you what's going to happen starting December one, two

0:47:05.320 --> 0:47:09.960
<v Speaker 1>thousand eleven, all the way through the Blood Wave, the Omegapulse,

0:47:10.480 --> 0:47:13.680
<v Speaker 1>the collapse of the dollar, the the return of the

0:47:13.719 --> 0:47:18.640
<v Speaker 1>ancient and unspeakable ones, um and uh and and the

0:47:18.719 --> 0:47:22.200
<v Speaker 1>Singularity as well, um and so yes, So we'll teach

0:47:22.239 --> 0:47:27.160
<v Speaker 1>you how to survive all of these terrible catastrophes until

0:47:27.280 --> 0:47:30.040
<v Speaker 1>December twelve, and then it's just all over for every

0:47:30.080 --> 0:47:32.719
<v Speaker 1>bo or maybe not, maybe not, I could be wrong.

0:47:33.239 --> 0:47:35.080
<v Speaker 1>Well that's probably right. Well, I think what you're saying

0:47:35.120 --> 0:47:39.120
<v Speaker 1>is there limits to even your power. Look, there is

0:47:39.160 --> 0:47:45.800
<v Speaker 1>a possibility that when two thousand excuse me, there is

0:47:45.840 --> 0:47:52.520
<v Speaker 1>a possibility, when December twelve comes around, that the last

0:47:52.600 --> 0:47:57.160
<v Speaker 1>event of Ragnarok will be the headless body of nugs

0:47:57.160 --> 0:48:02.239
<v Speaker 1>show hubb, one of the ancient unspeakable, pushing the Earth

0:48:02.320 --> 0:48:05.600
<v Speaker 1>through a rift in space time into another dimension in

0:48:05.760 --> 0:48:08.840
<v Speaker 1>which none of us have any memory of Ragnarok, and

0:48:09.000 --> 0:48:12.440
<v Speaker 1>the things in my book are considered to be simply

0:48:12.520 --> 0:48:16.520
<v Speaker 1>the flights of fancy of a television personality and the

0:48:16.640 --> 0:48:21.239
<v Speaker 1>made up facts of an adult, deranged millionaire. Look, I

0:48:21.320 --> 0:48:25.799
<v Speaker 1>hope that happens. Okay, probably not, But it's one possibility

0:48:26.640 --> 0:48:29.560
<v Speaker 1>that we will wake up on December twelve and it

0:48:29.560 --> 0:48:33.279
<v Speaker 1>will be like none of this has ever happened, sort

0:48:33.320 --> 0:48:38.160
<v Speaker 1>of like why two K? No, that's coming? Okay? Why

0:48:38.239 --> 0:48:41.359
<v Speaker 1>two K is coming next? In two thousand twelve, I think,

0:48:41.800 --> 0:48:46.279
<v Speaker 1>And about uh, it's sometime in May or June. The

0:48:46.360 --> 0:48:48.279
<v Speaker 1>thing with why tu K, though, is that it doesn't

0:48:48.280 --> 0:48:52.720
<v Speaker 1>attack computers. It only attacks like um small non mechanical

0:48:52.800 --> 0:48:57.759
<v Speaker 1>tools like can openers. We had that all wrong. It

0:48:57.880 --> 0:49:01.040
<v Speaker 1>is not after computers at all. Is it is after

0:49:01.280 --> 0:49:06.280
<v Speaker 1>non computerized helpful devices. It's weird, and John I misspoke.

0:49:06.320 --> 0:49:08.960
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to misquote your fake fact. But one

0:49:09.040 --> 0:49:11.960
<v Speaker 1>beat tricky dollar after the super collapse, so people know,

0:49:12.200 --> 0:49:15.560
<v Speaker 1>is equal to seven point three hours of human intimacy.

0:49:16.200 --> 0:49:19.120
<v Speaker 1>And that's what I'd spend my dollar on your dirky dollar.

0:49:20.200 --> 0:49:25.120
<v Speaker 1>Hankah guilt. Yeah, well that's it's not that those are

0:49:25.480 --> 0:49:28.200
<v Speaker 1>It's not that there's gonna be one currency. They're just

0:49:28.239 --> 0:49:30.040
<v Speaker 1>gonna it's you know, this is why I say you

0:49:30.040 --> 0:49:33.080
<v Speaker 1>shouldn't bother hoarding gold. Do you know what I mean? Yes,

0:49:33.200 --> 0:49:36.080
<v Speaker 1>gold is shiny. I'm not going to argue with you

0:49:36.160 --> 0:49:39.239
<v Speaker 1>on that's shiny and heavy, do you know what I mean?

0:49:40.080 --> 0:49:44.040
<v Speaker 1>But when you are are, when you have been turned

0:49:44.080 --> 0:49:50.560
<v Speaker 1>into an albino right by by the great worm hug numbeth. Right,

0:49:51.239 --> 0:49:54.440
<v Speaker 1>you don't care about gold. You want sunscreen, you know

0:49:54.480 --> 0:49:58.080
<v Speaker 1>what I mean? And the great thing about mayonnaise is

0:49:59.360 --> 0:50:02.600
<v Speaker 1>that it's not very good sunscreen, but it makes a

0:50:02.719 --> 0:50:06.480
<v Speaker 1>terrific short term albino mask. If you want to sneak

0:50:06.520 --> 0:50:10.960
<v Speaker 1>into albino town and sell them Mayonnai's posing a sunscreen.

0:50:12.640 --> 0:50:13.960
<v Speaker 1>This is how we're all gonna have to live in

0:50:14.040 --> 0:50:16.600
<v Speaker 1>the future. Do you understand what I'm saying? This is

0:50:16.640 --> 0:50:19.239
<v Speaker 1>why Mannai's is so helpful. It all comes back to this.

0:50:19.400 --> 0:50:22.960
<v Speaker 1>So listen, everybody. I hope by the time you hear this,

0:50:23.520 --> 0:50:26.080
<v Speaker 1>I will have solved the problem. Well, I got a guy.

0:50:26.480 --> 0:50:27.920
<v Speaker 1>You know you got a man. You got a comment

0:50:27.960 --> 0:50:32.120
<v Speaker 1>I gotta packet guy. He does all kinds. You're not messing.

0:50:32.160 --> 0:50:34.240
<v Speaker 1>You're not messing with the Hodgeman. Now are you want Hodgeman?

0:50:34.280 --> 0:50:36.200
<v Speaker 1>Catch up? You want Hodgman Tartar sauce? No, no, I

0:50:36.239 --> 0:50:39.919
<v Speaker 1>don't want Tartar sauce for right. What do you think

0:50:40.080 --> 0:50:41.680
<v Speaker 1>I got a guy? You think I'm looking for something

0:50:41.719 --> 0:50:43.520
<v Speaker 1>to put on a filet o fish. I'm looking for

0:50:43.600 --> 0:50:48.560
<v Speaker 1>something to save the world. I gotta go. I gotta

0:50:48.600 --> 0:50:50.560
<v Speaker 1>power down. Guys. It's been a lot of fun. I'm

0:50:50.600 --> 0:50:54.480
<v Speaker 1>sorry listeners whose mail did not get read because I

0:50:54.520 --> 0:50:57.719
<v Speaker 1>took over your segment. All four of you know now

0:50:57.840 --> 0:51:02.359
<v Speaker 1>come on, But I but I please understand, listeners, I too,

0:51:02.400 --> 0:51:04.759
<v Speaker 1>am a listener, and I hope you will continue to

0:51:04.800 --> 0:51:09.719
<v Speaker 1>support these two wonderful natural broadcasters even though they have

0:51:09.800 --> 0:51:13.080
<v Speaker 1>betrayed your trust by putting me on their podcast air

0:51:13.280 --> 0:51:16.000
<v Speaker 1>four weeks or four podcasts in a row, that's right

0:51:16.520 --> 0:51:19.040
<v Speaker 1>by that is all. I recommend the hardcover just because

0:51:19.080 --> 0:51:22.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm old school and it's all that exists. There's no

0:51:22.239 --> 0:51:26.000
<v Speaker 1>there's no audiobook, there is no electronic edition, there is

0:51:26.080 --> 0:51:28.879
<v Speaker 1>no paperback. There is only hardcover edition. You know why,

0:51:30.080 --> 0:51:32.719
<v Speaker 1>because when Ragnarok comes, you're not gonna You're gonna be

0:51:32.840 --> 0:51:38.279
<v Speaker 1>using your reading tablets to make shanties. That's right. This

0:51:38.400 --> 0:51:40.959
<v Speaker 1>is the only thing that's going to be left. Also,

0:51:41.000 --> 0:51:42.880
<v Speaker 1>I haven't gotten around to recording the audiobook, and I

0:51:42.880 --> 0:51:44.360
<v Speaker 1>don't know when we're going to do any book. So

0:51:44.480 --> 0:51:49.040
<v Speaker 1>if you want to support my life's work, seriously, please

0:51:49.080 --> 0:51:51.880
<v Speaker 1>come and see me on tour, or go to your

0:51:51.920 --> 0:51:54.120
<v Speaker 1>local bookshop and purchase the book. Go to see him

0:51:54.120 --> 0:51:56.400
<v Speaker 1>on tour. That's a treat, just to share air with you,

0:51:56.520 --> 0:51:59.520
<v Speaker 1>my friend. You know what. We're not sharing air. I'm

0:51:59.560 --> 0:52:03.120
<v Speaker 1>a holograp m you know. But but the people who

0:52:03.200 --> 0:52:05.080
<v Speaker 1>go see you will be able to share. They will,

0:52:05.760 --> 0:52:08.160
<v Speaker 1>and we have before and it's not. And my breath,

0:52:08.280 --> 0:52:10.360
<v Speaker 1>despite what you may have read and nothing to post,

0:52:11.160 --> 0:52:15.480
<v Speaker 1>my breath is not poison. So if you want to

0:52:15.560 --> 0:52:17.759
<v Speaker 1>catch up with the real Hodgeman, share some air with

0:52:17.960 --> 0:52:22.759
<v Speaker 1>him on tour right, you can go to areas of

0:52:22.880 --> 0:52:28.200
<v Speaker 1>my expertise dot com Areas of my expertise dot com.

0:52:29.719 --> 0:52:32.440
<v Speaker 1>Spell it out like a normal person. Or you can

0:52:32.520 --> 0:52:34.400
<v Speaker 1>tweet to him and be like Hodgeman, where are you at?

0:52:34.880 --> 0:52:40.840
<v Speaker 1>On Twitter by addressing it to at Hodgeman it's the

0:52:40.960 --> 0:52:44.560
<v Speaker 1>at sign at sign h O D G M A N. Yeah,

0:52:44.640 --> 0:52:47.359
<v Speaker 1>and that will go directly to John's pocket. I shall

0:52:47.560 --> 0:52:51.120
<v Speaker 1>and I shall feel it. Um. And if you are

0:52:51.200 --> 0:52:54.200
<v Speaker 1>ready to get back to business with us, join us

0:52:54.280 --> 0:52:57.640
<v Speaker 1>next week when things should be substantially more normal. Uh.

0:52:57.760 --> 0:53:01.960
<v Speaker 1>And in the meantime, if you want your listener mail red,

0:53:02.239 --> 0:53:03.920
<v Speaker 1>you send it to us. Send it to us right now,

0:53:04.040 --> 0:53:05.520
<v Speaker 1>and if it's the coolest one, it will be the

0:53:05.560 --> 0:53:09.919
<v Speaker 1>first one we read after the Hodgeman break post Hodgeman break,

0:53:10.280 --> 0:53:13.520
<v Speaker 1>and it will that will be substantial, that'll mean something. Okay, Hey,

0:53:13.600 --> 0:53:16.839
<v Speaker 1>you know what, whoever is listener mail you read next week,

0:53:17.120 --> 0:53:20.839
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna send them a free book that is really

0:53:22.000 --> 0:53:23.480
<v Speaker 1>and then it's on us to pick it out though.

0:53:23.560 --> 0:53:26.640
<v Speaker 1>So that's fun to trust you so they can bribe

0:53:26.760 --> 0:53:31.120
<v Speaker 1>us crazy how about but not but not Sarah? How no? No,

0:53:32.400 --> 0:53:38.759
<v Speaker 1>sorry Sarah. So I'm going to send something anyway? All right, Well,

0:53:38.800 --> 0:53:40.520
<v Speaker 1>then I would get to my email if I were you,

0:53:40.600 --> 0:53:42.640
<v Speaker 1>because obviously the first ones we get are gonna be

0:53:42.640 --> 0:53:45.440
<v Speaker 1>the ones we read. You can shoot us that email

0:53:45.719 --> 0:53:56.040
<v Speaker 1>at Stuff Podcast at how stuff works dot com. Be

0:53:56.160 --> 0:53:58.759
<v Speaker 1>sure to check out our new video podcast, Stuff from

0:53:58.800 --> 0:54:01.640
<v Speaker 1>the Future. Join hal staff Work Staff as we explore

0:54:01.680 --> 0:54:07.800
<v Speaker 1>the most promising and perplexing possibilities of tomorrow, brought to

0:54:07.880 --> 0:54:10.960
<v Speaker 1>you by the reinvented two thousand twelve cameray. It's ready,

0:54:11.160 --> 0:54:11.480
<v Speaker 1>are you