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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that just developed the solution to

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Speaker 1: get rid of your bed bugs. For forty dollars, you

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Speaker 1: can buy a canister of bed spiders.

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Speaker 2: When you release those.

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Speaker 1: Into your mattress credits and they'll be all the bugs

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Speaker 1: up in there. After that, you need to house them

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Speaker 1: in the bed permanently, and they're really good cud loose.

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Speaker 3: This eight lates yeah.

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Speaker 1: Full hug ever, because it's Laser Stories, the segment where

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Speaker 1: we read weird news stories around the globe, just like

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Speaker 1: everyone else does, except we've got a laser. Those other

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Speaker 1: Tarantia little spoons just this first Laser Stories out of Michigan.

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Speaker 1: Twenty six year old man named Tucker Buford broke into

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Speaker 1: a building the other night.

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Speaker 2: He thought it was empty, but just in case it wasn't.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he had a knife with him.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: As Tucker began trying to crack open the ATM with

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Speaker 1: the knife.

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Speaker 3: Oh, it was like going to be a deserted building mission,

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Speaker 3: he heard voices and that's when two Corrections deputies walked

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Speaker 3: around the corner and saw him. Those are the worst

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Speaker 3: people for him to run into.

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Speaker 1: Well, it turns out Tucker Buford had unknowingly just broken

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Speaker 1: into the lobby of the local county jail.

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Speaker 3: Wow, in there, you know, in case.

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Speaker 2: You need to like post bail and pay in.

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Speaker 3: All cash take checks.

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Speaker 1: Probably no, you never get ten thousand dollars out of.

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Speaker 2: It, So get a buddy out.

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Speaker 3: I was just going to bring in iou and.

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Speaker 2: Then I'll take those. But they noticed that he had

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Speaker 2: the knife, which.

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Speaker 1: Tucker tried to hide immediately under his hat.

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Speaker 3: That's good, threatened them.

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Speaker 1: The knife fell out, so the deputies just backed off

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Speaker 1: and hit a button, trapping him inside out by locking

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Speaker 1: the exterior doors electronically, which was possible because well, like

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Speaker 1: I said, it's a jail, it's a jail. So eventually

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Speaker 1: more cops came and when they opened the doors, they

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Speaker 1: arrested him. Tucker was escorted to his cell, which just

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Speaker 1: happened to be right down the hallway he delivered.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. Do you think he gets time off just because

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Speaker 3: he saved them on transportation?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we're gonna knock a thousand buns of your gas money.

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Speaker 2: The Stories out of Colorado.

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Speaker 1: Two seventeen year olds were just awarded the first ever

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Speaker 1: athletic scholarships to play Division one.

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Speaker 2: Yes cornhole.

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Speaker 3: Drinking game actual college sport. I thought it was so hard.

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Speaker 3: I thought it was just a frat boy yard game, if.

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Speaker 1: You know, the one where you toss the bean bag

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Speaker 1: and you have to get it into the hole far away.

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Speaker 1: So their names are Jackson Remick and Gavin Hammond. They

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Speaker 1: went to thunder Ridge High School near Denver, which apparently

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Speaker 1: has a strong cornhole program.

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Speaker 2: I guess.

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Speaker 1: A lot of bride in their corn hole. They're obviously

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Speaker 1: cornhole prodigies. And they won the first ever high school

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Speaker 1: championship together in twenty twenty one, and then another a

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Speaker 1: year LATERY.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know competition was that stiff.

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Speaker 1: On National Signing Day, they penned letters of intent to

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Speaker 1: play D one corn hole for Winthrop University in South Carolina.

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Speaker 2: Oh wait, they.

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Speaker 1: Have a national signing day like footballforms for that.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. Are we getting signed for beer pong next?

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Speaker 1: The school hasn't said how much the scholarship is for,

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Speaker 1: but it's not a full ride Okay. The new coach

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Speaker 1: at Winthrop though things full ride scholarships for cornhole could

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Speaker 1: happen eventually.

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Speaker 3: Wow, what does a coach do? Like, Hey, you're holding

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Speaker 3: your army wrong?

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Speaker 1: So how many times I tell you throwing in the hole,

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Speaker 1: Thanks coach.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna try that next time.

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Speaker 1: And these types of stories almost make me want to

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Speaker 1: go back.

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Speaker 2: To school and get back to corn hole.

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Speaker 1: And again, I mean I still dabble in cornhole, but

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Speaker 1: not professionally.

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Speaker 3: I was pretty good at Jenga. You know, can you

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Speaker 3: think we could put that on the lists? Cornhole?

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Speaker 2: We're moving on. We're gonna go to our next lazer story.

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Speaker 1: Out of the Netherlands, a delta flight from Amsterdam to

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Speaker 1: Detroit had to return to its home base for a

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Speaker 1: pretty unnerving reason.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, hopefully you're sitting down before I say this.

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Speaker 1: Apparently maggots were falling on people from the ceiling.

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Speaker 2: Maggot, It's true.

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Speaker 1: Less than an hour into the flight, the crew was

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Speaker 1: forced to turn the airbus A three point thirty around

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Speaker 1: because a passenger decided to stow their suitcase full of

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Speaker 1: rotten fish in the overhead.

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Speaker 2: They clean the plane. How does you know it smell

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Speaker 2: that like that?

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Speaker 3: I can't bring a little bit more toothpaste, but he

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Speaker 3: could bring a whole bag of rotten fish.

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Speaker 1: That's when the little maggots started getting out of the

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Speaker 1: bag and falling onto the passengers.

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Speaker 2: Seated in the ecount.

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Speaker 1: There wasn't much flight attendants could really do either, because

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Speaker 1: if they moved the bag, they feared even more spill it,

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Speaker 1: So the passengers were reportedly given blankets to cover their

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Speaker 1: heads as they had to endure the forty five minute

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Speaker 1: nightmare landing.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's the closest airport.

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Speaker 3: I mean, it's the only time where you're like, maybe

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Speaker 3: if we crash, it wouldn't be so bad.

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Speaker 2: At least the maggots will burn too.

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Speaker 1: Once on the ground, everyone deeplaned and the suitcase was

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Speaker 1: put into a special bag to be burned.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 1: The guy too was like, can I at least like

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Speaker 1: see if one of the fishes.

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Speaker 2: I caught.

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Speaker 1: The aircraft was deep cleaned and then reboarded, but the

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Speaker 1: flight crew was disappointed that only one person chose to

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Speaker 1: get back on.

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Speaker 2: No one wants to get on the maggot plane.

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Speaker 3: The maggot wagon.

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Speaker 2: It's as they sorways out of Survey World.

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Speaker 1: They just did a new study that if you're single

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Speaker 1: and you'll love to travel, Okay, you might want to

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Speaker 1: keep this in mind.

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Speaker 2: What state are you most likely to catch? An STD in?

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Speaker 2: Lucky Well implies I'm having sex.

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Speaker 3: So I'm still I feel like Florida is going to

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Speaker 3: be way up there just because of the retirement communities.

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Speaker 3: Those retirement communities are randy.

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Speaker 1: Researchers looked at stats from the CDC, state and local

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Speaker 1: health groups, and social media surveys as well.

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Speaker 2: So here are the results.

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Speaker 1: The ten most disease ridden places are Louisiana, North Carolina,

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Speaker 1: Mississippi or New Mexico, South Carolina, Georgia, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Alabama.

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Speaker 1: But the clear number one was probably a state you

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Speaker 1: don't associate with this type of thing. Going to get

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Speaker 1: a drum roll.

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Speaker 3: Please.

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Speaker 2: None other than the Great State of Alaska.

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Speaker 1: Gratulations Alaska, you win the std war.

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Speaker 3: I think the menda female ratio is real bad. So

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Speaker 3: if like one woman has it, that at least Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well, apparently, no matter what you're doing, you don't want

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Speaker 1: to do anything unprotected in the northernmost state of America.

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Speaker 3: That's that's good, Parka and your other cover up.

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Speaker 1: The state where you're least likely to catch something is

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Speaker 1: New Hampshire.

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Speaker 3: I thought he was going to New Utah. You're just

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Speaker 3: not doing it.

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Speaker 1: The rest of the ten cleanest places include West Virginia, Maine, Vermont,

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Speaker 1: Utah right there.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, Idaho is in the cleanest because I moved out.

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Speaker 3: Yeah yeah.

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Speaker 1: There's also Wyoming, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and New Jersey.

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Speaker 3: Okay, if you go to California, Jersey, you're good. Good.

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Speaker 3: New Jersey has been getting a bad rep for so long,

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Speaker 3: and finally they make a clean stateless you know.

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Speaker 1: As for this guy and his travel experiences with transmitted diseases, actually.

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Speaker 2: Pretty clean, well except that one time.

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Speaker 1: In Florida when he did get a bad case of turpies.

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Speaker 1: Turpys tell means laser stories have come to an end

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Speaker 1: for the day.

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Speaker 2: We'll do it again the same time on Monday

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Speaker 3: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.