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Speaker 1: What would you talk about on your on your podcast present.

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Speaker 1: I'm never cold, but today I'm cold. It's freezing in here.

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Speaker 1: Guys usually don't get cold. Yeah, then we have a

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Speaker 1: higher tolerance a layer of fat, and we eat more

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Speaker 1: red meat, and we don't shave our hair off our body.

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Speaker 1: There's there's some like great team and we usually have

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Speaker 1: we have larger, a larger frame. Yeah, that's the lay

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Speaker 1: or fat. He was not hunting and and uh, you know,

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Speaker 1: is that really why it's like that? Well, it's also

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Speaker 1: sixty five degrees in here and outside here in New York.

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Speaker 1: It's probably about I'm no joke. I'm actually gonna hold

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Speaker 1: on putting my taking my headphones off, putting on my

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Speaker 1: coat because I can't take it. Do you have hard nips? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: They are actually God actually just oh my god, just

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Speaker 1: left one, not hard one. It looks like you're tuning

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Speaker 1: your own rating. Scary with hard nips is like a

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Speaker 1: gum drop laying on top of ice cream. Like you

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Speaker 1: got a lot of softness around that little hard nip. There.

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Speaker 1: My coat, it's my coat, This is my this is

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Speaker 1: I have a coat for for like every season and

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Speaker 1: every in between season, in between season right now? Do

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Speaker 1: you guys have coats for different seasons? Yeah? I got

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Speaker 1: a coat for hot when I don't wear a coat,

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Speaker 1: and I have a season, I have a coat for

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Speaker 1: when it's cold. You have one coat? One I have

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Speaker 1: to maybe is that a g star? It's a star? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I have more kids than coats. I just realized that

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Speaker 1: you really only have one coat to have, like a

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Speaker 1: medium and a heave choice. How many coats do I need?

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Speaker 1: It's like shoes. You want to do you have a

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Speaker 1: coat to match every outfit? I have a coat keeps

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Speaker 1: me warm. I don't. Kathleen just joined us. So, Kathleen,

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Speaker 1: are you the type of person that always gets called

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Speaker 1: no matter what? Yes? Absolutely? Okay, More importantly, how many

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Speaker 1: coats do you own, like right now? Like seasonable? I

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Speaker 1: probably eight to ten coats? What what's the average coat? Wait?

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Speaker 1: What do you think Bertie has? How many coats do

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Speaker 1: you think Bertie has one? Yes? What do I need

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Speaker 1: another coat for? Because you need a spring jacket? Yeah? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I said, I have like a spring lightweight thing and

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Speaker 1: I have a coat. Then you need your active wear

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Speaker 1: winter coat. You know what I buy like a ski

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Speaker 1: jacket that looks active and that's my winter coat. What

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Speaker 1: do you go to a winter wedding? Then I leave

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Speaker 1: the coat in the car and I valley parked the

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Speaker 1: car and I go in with no coat. So what

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Speaker 1: about Elvis's Christmas party coming up? What kind of coat

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Speaker 1: with this? I probably have like a medium weight, decent jacket.

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Speaker 1: I'll wear over whatever. But I don't. I don't have

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Speaker 1: like I don't have multiple winter coat. Guys have problems

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Speaker 1: when it comes to getting dressed up in suits in

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Speaker 1: the winter, and that is look like idiots. Were like

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Speaker 1: idiots because we put a coat on and you have

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Speaker 1: a suit on underneath. And the problem you have problem

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Speaker 1: with overcoats for men like a long No, like a

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Speaker 1: long like an overcoat? How does a second part of

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Speaker 1: the This is what my father used to wear. It's

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Speaker 1: a little bit larger because you have to fit a suit.

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Speaker 1: That's the look. The problem is if you're under six

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Speaker 1: ft tall, it looks like you're wearing your dad's coat

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Speaker 1: because they come down long. They're like too long, so

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Speaker 1: you're either kicking them or it looks like you're wearing

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Speaker 1: like a smock. It's too big. They don't make them

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Speaker 1: for people in five I can run out of my

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Speaker 1: house real quick. Yeah, yeah, Nate's outside. If Nate comes

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Speaker 1: in here, he'll have a coat for every single god

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Speaker 1: damn cation he even has. He'll have a peak coat.

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Speaker 1: He's got a murdering coat. He doesn't. He's got a

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Speaker 1: trench coat to expose himself. You know. The trick is

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Speaker 1: is that when you buy an overcoat, depending on what

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Speaker 1: more than a dozen okay, you get a tailored to

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Speaker 1: your height. We're talking about two things we need your

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Speaker 1: input on. We all have theories about what your answer

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Speaker 1: is gonna be. Number one two part question, how many

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Speaker 1: winter coats do you have? Number number two? What do

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Speaker 1: you wear over a suit? Do you have an overcoat

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Speaker 1: to wear over suit? A top coat? I have several

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Speaker 1: top coats. I love winter coats. I love winter coats. Kathleen,

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Speaker 1: you'll love this new one. I just got camel. Camel.

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Speaker 1: Don't think there's nothing sharper than I wore it last

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Speaker 1: I wore it last weekend. My girlfriend could not stop

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Speaker 1: staring at me. But I love winter coats and over suits.

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Speaker 1: You have to wear a top coat. You can't wear

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Speaker 1: how tall you ate? I said, your coat? I can't.

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Speaker 1: It looks like I'm wearing my dad's cone. You know,

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Speaker 1: it looks like I looked like Tom Hanks in Big

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Speaker 1: when he's shrunk down and he's wearing like adult clothes.

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Speaker 1: I can't. They don't make top coats in my size.

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Speaker 1: I will go exactly and then the pockets are never

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Speaker 1: in the right they're not the right length. Down. You

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Speaker 1: have to go. You have to go shopping at a

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Speaker 1: place where they sell these things. Here's the here's the

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Speaker 1: problem where when you're not built like Nate, you can't

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Speaker 1: get clothing because if you, let's say, you need a

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Speaker 1: dress shirt and you need a bigger neck, they assume

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Speaker 1: you're taller and bigger, so you get a bigger neck.

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Speaker 1: But then the pocket is down, it's down by a

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Speaker 1: belly button and it's a long shirt. I get probably

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Speaker 1: half of my stuff tailor. Yeah, how many kids I

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Speaker 1: have to talk about the tailoring? How many how many

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Speaker 1: winter coach do you have? Five? Seven? Yeah? Like I said,

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Speaker 1: already called the whole thing that the thing is this,

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Speaker 1: I didn't listen, and I want to say this. I

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Speaker 1: had never in my life I thought that it would

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Speaker 1: make any freaking difference in the world if I had

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Speaker 1: a suit tailored to me when it comes to suits,

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Speaker 1: I had no clue. I'm like, get out of here.

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Speaker 1: That's a bunch of crap, and wasted my time getting

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Speaker 1: measured in eighteen places. No I was. I used to

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Speaker 1: have stuff that used to hang off of me, and

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Speaker 1: we used to It was like kind of like I

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Speaker 1: used graed off the rack. Yeah, straight off of a rack,

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Speaker 1: that's what he's talking. That's because mannequins don't look like.

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Speaker 1: One day, somebody bought me a suit for Christmas and

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Speaker 1: it was a tailored a tailoring for a suit, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm not you gonna go in. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: redeem this voucher for tailoring. I went in. The guy

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Speaker 1: took twenty minutes with me, and he says and all

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Speaker 1: the while as he's measuring me's like, trust me, everyone

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Speaker 1: is gonna notice that the next party you go to

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, get the hell out of here. Guys

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Speaker 1: were freaking suit tie. Nobody's nobody comments maybe on a tie,

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Speaker 1: they don't comment on your suit and whatever. Well, I

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Speaker 1: took that tailored suit and I wore it to the

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Speaker 1: next wedding I went to. Everybody in the room was

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Speaker 1: like that's a great suit. You look amazing. And I

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Speaker 1: swear to God, up until that point, I'm coming back

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Speaker 1: to only about a year and a half, I had

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Speaker 1: no clue up until that point that it really gave.

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Speaker 1: That it really matters. Telling you a hundred dollars in tailoring, hemming,

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Speaker 1: pulling your pants and alow, taking the sides and on

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Speaker 1: a jacket makes a can make a hundred dollar suit

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Speaker 1: look like a thousand dollars. Let's go around the room

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Speaker 1: for the men in the room. Scary, how many suits

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Speaker 1: do you want? Four? Hold on, hold on, Garrett six,

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Speaker 1: Brody Brodie to Nate. I just I just bought it

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Speaker 1: tuxedo yesterday. You needed different way you need a summer suit?

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Speaker 1: How many tuxedo? Only one? Only one? However, Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: I really had been needing one for such a long

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Speaker 1: time because they're just coming to different occasions where I

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Speaker 1: need a tuxedo. But yeah, I love having suits. I've

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Speaker 1: got three summer suits. I've got a sear sucker which

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Speaker 1: I've never had a chance to wear, thank you. Um yeah,

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Speaker 1: I've got three piece suits. I love suits. I don't

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Speaker 1: have any double breasted anymore because they kind of went

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Speaker 1: out of Vogue for a while, and nobody really buttons

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Speaker 1: their suits, and and I taught scary they always sometimes

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Speaker 1: never rule, but sometimes never always sometimes a three button suit,

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Speaker 1: which a three button suit, and not really need fashion anymore.

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Speaker 1: But the middle ones always the tops sometimes and the

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Speaker 1: bottom you never button when somebody buttons up their suit.

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Speaker 1: The whole way, I used the same rule. I always

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Speaker 1: should wear a suit to some events. I sometimes don't

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Speaker 1: go because I don't have a suit, and I always

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Speaker 1: regret going because I'm never dressed. Right, that's my I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna tell you we should get a tailor in here,

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Speaker 1: because you will love wearing a suit if you feel good.

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Speaker 1: I feel so great when I'm wearing. If you're listening

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Speaker 1: to the podcast and you're someone who tailor suits, and

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Speaker 1: you would love to to make a suit for me,

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Speaker 1: that I will social media all about feel free not

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Speaker 1: even make your suits. Like bringing a suit and they

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Speaker 1: will tailor it. Tomate's point, you could spend fifty nine

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Speaker 1: dollars on the suit you get a tailored. To spend

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Speaker 1: that extra money, it will look like a thousand dollars

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Speaker 1: and you'll feel more cocky than you are now. It's

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Speaker 1: just easier not to go to things where I need

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Speaker 1: to suit You need to do this before Elvis's party

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Speaker 1: so you can debut your tailors. I'm not gonna have

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Speaker 1: every other year. It's times like this. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I wish I was a woman. We get everything tailored. Everything,

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Speaker 1: do you really? Danielle and I had the same tailor.

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Speaker 1: And because Danielle and I are very short, we're only

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Speaker 1: five to everything needs to be tailored. Wow. Even some

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Speaker 1: of my stuff that like I get from Forever twenty one,

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Speaker 1: like cheapy stuff, I get tailored. Why did they just

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Speaker 1: discovery this like a year ago? But even shirts like

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Speaker 1: your shirts that you wear, you wear a button down shirts.

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Speaker 1: What I'll do is I'll take them and I'll buy

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Speaker 1: him for fifty bucks or whatever. And then they're bagging

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Speaker 1: the back. What they good they can do is they

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Speaker 1: dart the back, so they just suck all the excess

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Speaker 1: fabric in r What happens when, well, then you got

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Speaker 1: a shirt. You know, Ronnie's girlfriends just got him a

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Speaker 1: gift certificate to a place near our office where he

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Speaker 1: got he got a tailored shirt. They took his measurements

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Speaker 1: and made the shirt to fit his body against So

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Speaker 1: I got one in two thousand fourteen for my birthday,

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Speaker 1: and the voucher is still sitting on um, you know,

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Speaker 1: on my counter. I have not taken take it. You

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Speaker 1: should do it. What are you waiting for? I don't

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Speaker 1: know what I'm waiting for. I'm also curious about Nate's hemorrhoids. No,

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Speaker 1: I's been thinking about you, right, you know. Oddly enough,

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Speaker 1: this is really too much information. They're not that it's

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Speaker 1: it because there's one. It's not that painful. Him a

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Speaker 1: roid doesn't really itch, but it's I thought I thought

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Speaker 1: it was a tum I'm not even kidding. Like, you know,

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Speaker 1: when you're washing yourself and I don't know how invasive

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Speaker 1: you guys get when you're washing your backside, And I'm like,

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Speaker 1: what the fun is that? What is that? Lufa? No?

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Speaker 1: I uh, I use one of those, not lufa. Would

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Speaker 1: you call them the shower sponge not a sham? Wow,

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Speaker 1: it's the ball the gelballer. Yeah yeah, And I was

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Speaker 1: getting back in there. I'm like what everybody on social

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Speaker 1: media said, there's this thing called tucks. It's like pads.

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Speaker 1: It's like witch hazel pads called what the old people?

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Speaker 1: You talk to them somewhere. Now, I I've used trust me,

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Speaker 1: they make three different kinds of preparation. H I'm on

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Speaker 1: like Z right now. I'm like, I've tried every formula.

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Speaker 1: So when Nate was talking to Dr Oz about his hemorrhoid,

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Speaker 1: started googling hemorrhoid songs on YouTube. Do you want a

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Speaker 1: good left today? There's a thousand songs just of guys

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Speaker 1: either singing about hemorrhoids or hemorroid or cartoons about hemorrhoid song.

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Speaker 1: So if you want a good giggle, look up hemorrhoid

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Speaker 1: song on YouTube. Yeah, it's a cartoon. And I'm telling you,

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Speaker 1: unless you have there's just no joke. Like I know

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Speaker 1: you guys are making fun of it because I don't

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Speaker 1: ever want that. What is it? What does it look like?

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Speaker 1: It looks like bubble gums stuck on my ass? I

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Speaker 1: don't know what to tell you. Think. Hemorrhoids are sometimes

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Speaker 1: caused by um like buck clenching or a lot of pressure,

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Speaker 1: like pregnant women get them when they push out of baby,

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Speaker 1: they get they get hemorrhoids from the So what have

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Speaker 1: you been doing with your butt's been clenching so much

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Speaker 1: that you know, like I eat a lot of fiber.

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Speaker 1: I don't think I really strained that much when I'm

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Speaker 1: are you waterfalling? Did you waterfall? No? It wasn't from

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Speaker 1: waterfa I haven't had sex this one. I'm I'm just

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Speaker 1: kind of like a passionated Do you think it's the James?

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Speaker 1: I thought it might have been the jeans, as the

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Speaker 1: jeans were a little bit tighter, so I thought maybe

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Speaker 1: because I was wearing tighter jeans. What if it's a

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Speaker 1: friction blister just from the tight jeans. Friction blister? I

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Speaker 1: show them in concert list. They're awesome, up and coming

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Speaker 1: rock band. By the way, that bands a band that's

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Speaker 1: gonna pop seconds. I don't think lest he needs to

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Speaker 1: make a bath full of Epps and salt your butthole.

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Speaker 1: But won't that release everything out of my butt hole?

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Speaker 1: You don't you need that? Calumine? Calumine, that's that's for

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Speaker 1: if I have like mosquito bites on my ass? Right,

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Speaker 1: you try pepto bismal animal chicken pox? Is that you

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Speaker 1: making that? I'm not putting anything up there. It's bad enough.

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Speaker 1: I have to Oh it's Friday, right, traffic jams. He

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Speaker 1: needs to stay away from dairy man really looks like

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Speaker 1: you have my diet. Maybe that's the thing. Well, it's

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Speaker 1: it's Yeah, I'm scared to go to the bathroom. Just

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Speaker 1: think if you think you're gonna have a bad weekend

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Speaker 1: this weekend, just thinking Nate, he hasn't even worse weekend

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Speaker 1: ahead of him. Do you have a female doctor that

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Speaker 1: you're gonna go to see you on this? Like a

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Speaker 1: guy in a college is scary? Yeah, go by a squatty?

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Speaker 1: Would you? Would you allow? Would you allow? No? I

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Speaker 1: don't even like going down there myself. I mean I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to get invite anybody down there. Yeah, you

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Speaker 1: know what I've I've has every guy in this room

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Speaker 1: had an exam. Yes, no, I haven't yet. I'm not

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Speaker 1: forty yet on a scale not okay, Uh, it's not

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Speaker 1: I don't know if it's I think it's I don't

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Speaker 1: know if it's worse. Like as as I felt awkward

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Speaker 1: having a guy do it, but I think I would

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Speaker 1: be more awkward having a woman do it. Like I

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Speaker 1: feel guilt. I feel guilt, like I'm really sorry, Like

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Speaker 1: the guy wasn't sorry. I was just awkward. I wasn't

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Speaker 1: apologizing to him. And there's no warning. He's just like

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Speaker 1: put your elbows on the table, And I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: because it's routine for him. Right. But here's the thing.

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Speaker 1: I think I told the story once. Um when I

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Speaker 1: turned around, like, I didn't hear the gloves snap, when

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Speaker 1: the gloves come off. I didn't hear it, And there

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Speaker 1: was no garbage peel near him, So I think maybe

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Speaker 1: he didn't use gloves. Oh my god, like he may

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Speaker 1: want to be like one of these guys who like

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Speaker 1: he needs to feel everything, because I was way waiting

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Speaker 1: for the snap, but there was no snap and gloves

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Speaker 1: coming off. Which name it? Like, what do you think

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Speaker 1: it's name would be? Oh my god, I don't probably Elvis.

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Speaker 1: You gotta do what you gotta do. Yeah, I think Hermann,

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Speaker 1: Herman Roid, Herman Herman. By the way, if it's here

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Speaker 1: on Monday, I'm definitely gonna give it a name, as

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Speaker 1: a user of this kind of phone, name it, and

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Speaker 1: then it'd be Android Android Joe, feel Better, Don't Done

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Speaker 1: Pepto fifteen minute Morning Show