1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:05,600 Speaker 1: Okayop yo. We are live. 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:09,600 Speaker 2: No one is inside, but we should open a cold 3 00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:12,280 Speaker 2: one anyway to celebrate with a little sip. 4 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:16,239 Speaker 1: Let's get into it. Cheers do it? 5 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:19,040 Speaker 2: Am I the a hole for meeting my ten year 6 00:00:19,079 --> 00:00:22,279 Speaker 2: old daughter and telling her I thought she was aborted. 7 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:30,800 Speaker 3: Sounds on the surface like a horrendous situation and sounds. 8 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:34,920 Speaker 1: Just so ridiculously bad. I'm very I'm very worried. To start. 9 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:37,760 Speaker 2: My ex and I were nineteen when she got pregnant. 10 00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:40,120 Speaker 2: We had recently broke up, and she found out a 11 00:00:40,159 --> 00:00:42,840 Speaker 2: couple weeks later that she was pregnant. 12 00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 1: She said she planned. 13 00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:47,160 Speaker 2: To abort the kid, but only wanted her sister there, 14 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:49,960 Speaker 2: so I was always under the belief that she had 15 00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:53,280 Speaker 2: aboard it. She only contacted me once saying it was done, 16 00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:57,520 Speaker 2: and we didn't speak again. Fast forward nineteen years later. 17 00:00:57,920 --> 00:01:02,440 Speaker 2: Nineteen years whoa a month ago? That was a lie? 18 00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:05,800 Speaker 2: Oh my ex passed away three years ago and my 19 00:01:05,920 --> 00:01:09,520 Speaker 2: daughter Kara has been living with her uncle. He which 20 00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:11,520 Speaker 2: is just like there's just so much wrong with. 21 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:15,920 Speaker 3: Oh this, like the like everything word escalates so much, 22 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:18,600 Speaker 3: I know, like the ex odd is dead. 23 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:20,800 Speaker 2: He was the one to reach out to give me 24 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:23,880 Speaker 2: a heads up after she expressed an interest in wanting 25 00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:26,399 Speaker 2: us to connect. So the daughter right right. He and 26 00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:29,120 Speaker 2: I spoke at length because I was feeling some pretty 27 00:01:29,240 --> 00:01:33,120 Speaker 2: strong emotions, like rage for never being told about her, 28 00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:36,479 Speaker 2: which I told he understand, like you think you don't 29 00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:37,920 Speaker 2: have a daughter, and then all of a sudden, you 30 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:38,480 Speaker 2: have a daughter. 31 00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:39,480 Speaker 1: Crazy. 32 00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:42,040 Speaker 2: My ex had backed out of a boarding the kid, 33 00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:44,520 Speaker 2: but didn't want me involved because we were broken up, 34 00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:47,160 Speaker 2: so decided just not to tell me, which I think 35 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:49,480 Speaker 2: is an asshole move there. Yeah, but he told me 36 00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:53,520 Speaker 2: that Kara doesn't know about that. Apparently I wasn't ready 37 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:56,720 Speaker 2: for fatherhood because we were both so young, so I bailed. 38 00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:59,120 Speaker 1: So she was ready for motherhood. Yeah, and but also 39 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:02,280 Speaker 1: like that's just not true. He had no idea Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, 40 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:04,520 Speaker 1: no idea. Yeah. I couldn't believe it. 41 00:02:04,680 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 2: Rob Her uncle told me he knows his sister was 42 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:10,200 Speaker 2: wrong for that, but promised Kara doesn't have any negative 43 00:02:10,200 --> 00:02:12,920 Speaker 2: feelings towards me, and my ex never painted me as 44 00:02:12,919 --> 00:02:15,680 Speaker 2: some villain, just a young guy who knew he couldn't 45 00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:17,680 Speaker 2: properly care for her. He asked me not to tell 46 00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:20,800 Speaker 2: Kara this when we talk if she asks, and because 47 00:02:20,919 --> 00:02:23,480 Speaker 2: like it could you know, hurt the way she saw 48 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:27,520 Speaker 2: her mom and again her mom is dead, so. 49 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,680 Speaker 3: So so he got a lie to her because they 50 00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:30,120 Speaker 3: lied to her. 51 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:32,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, I know, is that where we're at. That's a 52 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:33,200 Speaker 1: bunch of vs. 53 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:37,240 Speaker 2: Okay, and Op says, I never actually confirmed I would. 54 00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:39,960 Speaker 2: Kara messaged me and we've been talking. I've met her 55 00:02:39,960 --> 00:02:43,519 Speaker 2: twice and it's been crazy emotional looking at this girl 56 00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:46,840 Speaker 2: who looks just like me and hurting that we're just 57 00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:49,280 Speaker 2: barely getting to know each other right now, Like, oh, dude, 58 00:02:49,280 --> 00:02:51,919 Speaker 2: I can't imagine how so far our conversations have only 59 00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:55,120 Speaker 2: been about what her life was like, how my life is, 60 00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:57,919 Speaker 2: what her wants slash future goals are, and just getting 61 00:02:57,919 --> 00:03:00,200 Speaker 2: to know each other in general. We met again Tuesday, 62 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:03,840 Speaker 2: and she finally decided to ask the obvious questions about 63 00:03:03,919 --> 00:03:06,880 Speaker 2: what made me not want to be involved and how 64 00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:09,000 Speaker 2: did I feel and what went through my mind? Did 65 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,359 Speaker 2: I ever think about her, et cetera. I'd been thinking 66 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:14,320 Speaker 2: about what to do, but in that moment, I just 67 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:16,920 Speaker 2: didn't have it in me to lie. So I was 68 00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:19,800 Speaker 2: honest that I was told that she had been boarded 69 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:23,400 Speaker 2: and had no idea she existed until now, but that 70 00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:25,360 Speaker 2: I still really want to be in her life and 71 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:28,360 Speaker 2: have a chance to be her father if she wants that. 72 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:32,320 Speaker 3: Imagine being the daughter to dude, that's a ball, Rob, 73 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:33,959 Speaker 3: so much big. 74 00:03:35,080 --> 00:03:37,000 Speaker 2: You think your father doesn't want to be in your 75 00:03:37,040 --> 00:03:40,840 Speaker 2: life for nineteen years, and then to say that your 76 00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,920 Speaker 2: dead mother lied to you, like you find out your 77 00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:46,400 Speaker 2: dead mother lied to you about your father, like, I 78 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:49,560 Speaker 2: don't even know how you proiss that rough car was 79 00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:52,040 Speaker 2: a bit emotional. We talked some more and said she 80 00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:55,320 Speaker 2: still wants me to be involved. That night, my messages 81 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:58,920 Speaker 2: were blowing up, not just from Rob, but her grandparents 82 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 2: as well. They're all outraged for telling Kara about her mom, 83 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:05,560 Speaker 2: because she yelled at all of them and is refusing 84 00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:07,640 Speaker 2: even to take their call. So there's a bunch of 85 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:10,200 Speaker 2: fallout now from all of this stuff. Yes, the lie 86 00:04:10,240 --> 00:04:13,160 Speaker 2: was terrible, but I just ruined the image she had 87 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:16,520 Speaker 2: of her late mother for my own benefit. Rob called 88 00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:20,040 Speaker 2: me a selfish dick for not taking into consideration how 89 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,520 Speaker 2: this would affect Kara finding out about this, So right 90 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:26,039 Speaker 2: now I feel like absolute shit. I get honesty is 91 00:04:26,040 --> 00:04:27,919 Speaker 2: the best policy, but in this case, I don't know 92 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:30,000 Speaker 2: if I was an asshole for doing it. I'm still 93 00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:32,760 Speaker 2: learning this whole dad business, so I don't know if 94 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:33,880 Speaker 2: I dropped the ball here. 95 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,520 Speaker 3: I give him kudos for his acknowledgment at the end 96 00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:38,920 Speaker 3: of like I did ruin the image of her mom 97 00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:41,039 Speaker 3: who's now dead, so she like there can be no 98 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:42,240 Speaker 3: communication about it. 99 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:43,480 Speaker 1: Let's get a Wigi board out. 100 00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, to get that Ouiji board out, and then all 101 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:50,560 Speaker 2: the questions dead mom, all the questions. 102 00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:52,520 Speaker 3: I want to say, He's not the asshole, but that 103 00:04:52,680 --> 00:04:55,479 Speaker 3: is something to be considered, Like her mother is dead, 104 00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:58,359 Speaker 3: and you know that is a really really negative side. 105 00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:00,559 Speaker 1: Effect A right hot take? Though, Oh good hot they 106 00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:01,160 Speaker 1: go right? 107 00:05:01,360 --> 00:05:05,360 Speaker 2: So would you rather have the dad who is alive 108 00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:08,719 Speaker 2: have a good relationship with his daughter or would you 109 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,279 Speaker 2: rather the dad who is alive who's gonna have that 110 00:05:11,320 --> 00:05:15,360 Speaker 2: relationship with his daughter continue his relationship be marred by 111 00:05:15,360 --> 00:05:17,840 Speaker 2: this thing that his wife lied about or is his 112 00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:21,320 Speaker 2: girlfriend lied about and then like preserve the image of 113 00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:23,760 Speaker 2: his dead mother, Like I say, just like tell the 114 00:05:23,760 --> 00:05:26,599 Speaker 2: truth and then repair the relationship with the person that 115 00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:29,839 Speaker 2: is alive who cares about the dead person? Who cares 116 00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:30,920 Speaker 2: about the dead person? 117 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:31,800 Speaker 1: Hot take? 118 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,039 Speaker 3: I'm not just saying this doesn't sound that hot of 119 00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:37,600 Speaker 3: a take. I'm like, okay, now, now here we go. Yeah, no, no, no, Honestly, 120 00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:40,560 Speaker 3: I mean a the daughter's life like nineteen, that's still 121 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:42,599 Speaker 3: very young or no. No, her mother died when she 122 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:45,600 Speaker 3: was basically three years before she was nineteen, so I 123 00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:48,200 Speaker 3: mean she wasn't even an adult, she was still a teenager. 124 00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:52,479 Speaker 3: Like all things considered, even considering the unintended consequences, he 125 00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:53,080 Speaker 3: did the right thing. 126 00:05:53,200 --> 00:05:56,760 Speaker 2: Mitch more Land Fan eighty. He says someone should have 127 00:05:56,800 --> 00:06:01,960 Speaker 2: been honest with her before now, which is like, like obviously, bro, 128 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:04,960 Speaker 2: like all the grandparents are getting mad and everyone's getting 129 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:07,440 Speaker 2: like Rob's getting mad. But bro, like the whole you 130 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:09,080 Speaker 2: should have been honest with her. What are you doing 131 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:10,960 Speaker 2: with your whole family? Are the a holes? 132 00:06:11,040 --> 00:06:13,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like they shouldn't be yelling at him that 133 00:06:13,880 --> 00:06:17,000 Speaker 3: at a bare minimum, this should be a conversation. Yeah, like, hey, 134 00:06:17,440 --> 00:06:21,240 Speaker 3: here's why you know, we don't want this image of 135 00:06:21,279 --> 00:06:21,640 Speaker 3: your mom. 136 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:23,760 Speaker 1: No, they're just like calling him angry. No no, no no no. 137 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:28,040 Speaker 2: Also, someone agrees with me, our dot Anna dot O says, 138 00:06:28,279 --> 00:06:31,240 Speaker 2: I agree the living relationship is more important at this point, 139 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,520 Speaker 2: and like you summed it up imperfectly. 140 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,680 Speaker 1: Like Anna, oh a, the right take. 141 00:06:35,839 --> 00:06:36,200 Speaker 3: Let's go. 142 00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:43,600 Speaker 2: What to the relationship pages? Yeah yeah yeah, someone's saying 143 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:48,920 Speaker 2: part two, brone. 144 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:54,080 Speaker 3: Oh no, everyone comment part two in the comments right 145 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,200 Speaker 3: now to blow up this line. 146 00:06:55,279 --> 00:06:55,720 Speaker 1: Here we go. 147 00:06:55,839 --> 00:06:59,039 Speaker 3: If we get ten thousand followers in the next five minutes, 148 00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:03,600 Speaker 3: we will put as part two immediately, or you have 149 00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:04,440 Speaker 3: me TikTok.