WEBVTT - That Damn Dog with BJ Ganem 0:00:09.240 --> 0:00:11.719 Welcome to the Good Stuff. I'm Jacob Shick and I'm 0:00:11.760 --> 0:00:14.560 joined by my co host and wife, Ashley Shik. 0:00:15.280 --> 0:00:17.680 Welcome everyone, and thank you so much for joining us 0:00:17.760 --> 0:00:20.799 on this journey as we get to tell stories of 0:00:21.079 --> 0:00:25.799 inspiration and perseverance. Everyone's got a story and we're excited 0:00:25.880 --> 0:00:26.599 to share them with you. 0:00:27.000 --> 0:00:29.720 We believe that everybody's got a story. We're telling from 0:00:29.720 --> 0:00:32.360 the valleys to the peaks, and we're really interested in 0:00:32.440 --> 0:00:35.680 what fed their soul to get them through their trying 0:00:35.760 --> 0:00:38.520 times to be able to come and tell these inspirational 0:00:38.560 --> 0:00:41.440 stories to provide a little bit of light in a 0:00:41.520 --> 0:00:43.680 world that seems to be full of a lot of darkness. 0:00:44.000 --> 0:00:49.640 Again, Welcome to the Good Stuff. Our guest today is 0:00:49.800 --> 0:00:53.560 bj Gannham, who is the founder of Sierra Delta, which 0:00:53.640 --> 0:00:57.400 is a national nonprofit that works to help all veterans 0:00:57.440 --> 0:01:00.520 with various types of dog training to help guide veterans 0:01:00.560 --> 0:01:04.520 to better overall wellness and health through the love of dogs. 0:01:04.880 --> 0:01:10.440 Bj is a fellow Marine. He's also a fellow amputee. 0:01:10.560 --> 0:01:12.440 Yeah, y'all are both blessed by fire. 0:01:12.600 --> 0:01:15.840 But he only has the one amputation, so really it 0:01:15.920 --> 0:01:19.679 wasn't that bad bad, No, we're comparing in comparison. 0:01:20.200 --> 0:01:22.839 I feel like y'all are brothers separated at birth. 0:01:22.880 --> 0:01:25.560 The two of you, quite possible. We have a lot 0:01:25.600 --> 0:01:28.440 in common. Really, it's strange. We knew that the day 0:01:28.480 --> 0:01:31.520 we met. We have all these things in common. I 0:01:31.560 --> 0:01:35.240 was immediately drawn to Bj. It's just the type of 0:01:35.280 --> 0:01:38.000 human that he is. We both played for the Wounded 0:01:38.000 --> 0:01:42.800 Warrior ampute football team, just a bunch of veterans, some wounded, 0:01:43.120 --> 0:01:46.120 some not to play against NFL alumni, and we have 0:01:46.240 --> 0:01:49.600 those games one or two times a year. We both 0:01:49.800 --> 0:01:53.560 have gotten DUIs, so you know, not something that we 0:01:53.680 --> 0:01:54.520 like to brag about. 0:01:54.800 --> 0:01:55.040 Right. 0:01:56.160 --> 0:02:00.440 We both have dealt with some really dark time, right. 0:02:00.680 --> 0:02:05.400 We both have dealt with suicidal idiation, and we've battled 0:02:05.400 --> 0:02:10.040 a lot of the same demons post war. And he 0:02:10.480 --> 0:02:13.399 has one up on me being also a cancer survivor. 0:02:13.560 --> 0:02:17.120 And he is just the he epitomizes the word warrior. 0:02:17.240 --> 0:02:20.079 That's who BJ is. And as you well know, I 0:02:20.120 --> 0:02:22.160 couldn't possibly love him anymore. 0:02:22.240 --> 0:02:24.960 He's definitely a warrior, he's definitely a survivor. And we 0:02:25.000 --> 0:02:33.120 are so excited to share this conversation with you. We 0:02:33.240 --> 0:02:36.520 are so thrilled today to be joined by one of 0:02:36.600 --> 0:02:42.000 our dear friends, Marine Sergent, veteran founder and CEO of 0:02:42.040 --> 0:02:45.960 Sierra Delta, which is a national nonprofit working to help 0:02:46.000 --> 0:02:48.679 all veterans with various types of dog training to help 0:02:48.760 --> 0:02:54.000 guide veterans to better overall wellness through the love of dogs. BJ. 0:02:54.200 --> 0:02:55.840 Thank you so much for joining us here on the 0:02:55.840 --> 0:02:56.280 good stuff. 0:02:56.280 --> 0:02:59.000 Thanks for having me. Absolutely proud of you guys. 0:02:59.160 --> 0:03:00.800 You two have known each other for a long time, 0:03:01.480 --> 0:03:04.160 and you earned your spot on the amputee flag football 0:03:04.160 --> 0:03:07.320 team because you also have lost a leg. 0:03:07.600 --> 0:03:10.720 Absolutely, we didn't. Just for the record, we didn't lose 0:03:10.760 --> 0:03:11.880 them like I know where mine went. 0:03:12.000 --> 0:03:12.440 That's true. 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:16.240 Yeah, that's anything like it just makes it sound irresponsible, 0:03:16.280 --> 0:03:19.200 it really does. I just didn't have the ability to reta. 0:03:19.520 --> 0:03:21.679 That bomb tried to take way more than just my leg, 0:03:21.680 --> 0:03:24.120 and all it got was a few toes. 0:03:25.120 --> 0:03:28.080 There you go. Fact, I love it. 0:03:28.120 --> 0:03:32.040 But yeah, y'all established such an incredible friendship and brotherhood. 0:03:32.200 --> 0:03:35.320 Yeah, being blessed by fire is only a few of us, right, 0:03:35.440 --> 0:03:37.120 There's a lot of people that served. There's only a 0:03:37.160 --> 0:03:39.680 few of us, and it's always a lottery. People can 0:03:39.720 --> 0:03:42.480 always say that they were in whatever unit, but who 0:03:42.560 --> 0:03:45.560 gets called and who gets the action is that's something 0:03:45.560 --> 0:03:46.640 you can't really predict. 0:03:47.120 --> 0:03:49.800 No, that's a fact, like it's luck of the draw. 0:03:49.960 --> 0:03:50.800 It is so. 0:03:50.920 --> 0:03:52.240 Are y'all any good at football? 0:03:53.320 --> 0:03:57.280 Yeah, we're undefeated against NFL legends for a decade now. 0:03:57.920 --> 0:03:59.480 I don't know. I've scored a lot of touchdowns. I 0:03:59.480 --> 0:04:01.760 don't really keep track. I've seen Jake do some pretty 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:04.240 amazing things with the Ninja turtle hand, and. 0:04:05.520 --> 0:04:07.320 It's amazing what some athletics tape can do. 0:04:07.480 --> 0:04:09.640 You know what's really amazing is I think they filmed 0:04:09.640 --> 0:04:12.440 this in slow motion because I swear I'm going way faster, 0:04:12.880 --> 0:04:15.520 and now watch it on video, I'm not as fast 0:04:15.560 --> 0:04:20.960 as I feel, which is it's physics. It is physics. 0:04:21.480 --> 0:04:23.080 Y'all aren't as young as y'all once were. 0:04:23.720 --> 0:04:28.280 I do remember picking offense younget go in the same. 0:04:28.040 --> 0:04:32.160 Game, the greatest of all time. I'm a Texas long horner, 0:04:32.200 --> 0:04:37.320 a diehard Texas longhorned football fan. National Championships. Yeah, any 0:04:37.400 --> 0:04:39.159 highlights for you, BJ that you can think of. 0:04:39.320 --> 0:04:41.160 One of the greatest things is we did an off 0:04:41.200 --> 0:04:43.880 Super Bowl game in Dallas. Here in Dallas, and Roger 0:04:43.920 --> 0:04:48.520 Stablach was there and his Achilles was bothering him. 0:04:48.160 --> 0:04:49.840 And you took full advantage of that. 0:04:51.279 --> 0:04:55.680 So he's a nat Academy graduate, so he's definitely on 0:04:55.720 --> 0:04:57.719 our team. But a couple of times you have me 0:04:57.760 --> 0:05:01.200 wide open and it went high and he got picked off. 0:05:01.040 --> 0:05:05.280 And I remember, dude, he was down. He was he 0:05:05.400 --> 0:05:07.760 is still a straight up competitor. 0:05:07.440 --> 0:05:09.920 Yeah, and so he was. He was mad at himself. 0:05:10.560 --> 0:05:12.120 It was a year and a half later that I 0:05:12.160 --> 0:05:14.800 saw him at the San Francisco super Bowl at the 0:05:14.800 --> 0:05:17.080 Hall of Fame breakfast and he comes up to me. 0:05:17.120 --> 0:05:19.360 He goes, I want you to know, like, my Achilles 0:05:19.400 --> 0:05:21.279 is better. If you guys need me, just call me. 0:05:21.480 --> 0:05:23.720 I want to play again. And I was like, sir, 0:05:23.800 --> 0:05:27.000 you're Roger freaking Stall Like, if you want to go 0:05:27.040 --> 0:05:28.880 have a catch in the street right now, let's go, 0:05:30.440 --> 0:05:34.920 Like you can, don't You're all time quarterback. I don't 0:05:34.920 --> 0:05:37.880 care if you threw four hundred picks, Like that's it, right. 0:05:38.360 --> 0:05:40.839 So those are one of the it's the relationships with 0:05:41.040 --> 0:05:44.839 those guys and the similarities between the NFL and the military, 0:05:44.880 --> 0:05:47.240 because once you're done at the NFL, you drop off 0:05:47.279 --> 0:05:49.760 to the Players Association, and once you're done with the military, 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:53.479 you drop off to the VA and they're both woefully 0:05:54.240 --> 0:05:59.599 underprepared and under There's not enough leadership to care for 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:02.520 these things, and that's a huge void to fill being 0:06:02.560 --> 0:06:05.479 either in the military or a pro athlete, especially at 0:06:05.520 --> 0:06:07.760 the NFL, Like we have to think about two. Often 0:06:07.800 --> 0:06:11.919 people criticize pro athletes for saying that they're warriors and stuff, 0:06:11.920 --> 0:06:14.640 and I don't agree. The hardest thing you've ever been 0:06:14.680 --> 0:06:16.600 doing in your life is the hardest thing. If you're 0:06:16.640 --> 0:06:21.039 fighting cancer, you're a warrior. If you're agreed fighting against dyslexia, 0:06:21.279 --> 0:06:23.560 you're a warrior. Like if you're fighting to be the 0:06:23.560 --> 0:06:26.840 best at something, you are warring with yourself and you 0:06:26.880 --> 0:06:31.800 are a warrior. Nobody owns warrior, and I encourage everybody 0:06:31.839 --> 0:06:34.520 to find a war to fight within your own life 0:06:34.760 --> 0:06:36.360 so that you can come out the other side better. 0:06:36.480 --> 0:06:38.800 Or it is technology, it just acknowledge it that there's 0:06:38.880 --> 0:06:41.240 effort in life. No matter the creature comforts we have, 0:06:41.360 --> 0:06:45.560 this is still a jungle. So it's it's the relationships 0:06:45.600 --> 0:06:48.400 of how these men use the termmine. Even though we 0:06:48.440 --> 0:06:51.040 have Jen Welter on the team, the first female coach 0:06:51.120 --> 0:06:52.800 in the NFL, by the way. 0:06:52.800 --> 0:06:56.040 One of those picks. I tossed it to Jen. There 0:06:56.080 --> 0:06:57.400 you go, and she took it for six. 0:06:57.480 --> 0:06:57.840 There you go. 0:06:58.480 --> 0:06:59.320 Yeah, she can fly. 0:06:59.440 --> 0:07:02.200 She can fly, you can play and a lot of 0:07:02.240 --> 0:07:04.440 the And that's what we're learning. I mean through this 0:07:04.600 --> 0:07:07.160 flag football team. We've made a partnership with Snoop Doggs 0:07:07.200 --> 0:07:11.160 Special Stars, which is a flag football league created for 0:07:11.360 --> 0:07:14.680 kids with special needs. Right, so many other people can 0:07:14.680 --> 0:07:18.280 play football and get something. Alyssa Milano and Jen Welter 0:07:18.520 --> 0:07:20.240 have a day in the life where they're trying to 0:07:20.280 --> 0:07:25.560 help women understand all the different opportunities within the sporting world. 0:07:25.680 --> 0:07:28.320 That doesn't really necessarily mean that you're playing on the field. 0:07:28.400 --> 0:07:32.880 But hey, you're a longtime Texas Longhorns fan, right, you 0:07:32.880 --> 0:07:35.200 have bad taste in football teams, but you probably have 0:07:35.240 --> 0:07:38.160 really great taste in clothes. And you want Texas los 0:07:40.040 --> 0:07:41.600 shots fired, just kicking. 0:07:41.520 --> 0:07:43.720 Find shots received. We're Texas, we're at the. 0:07:43.800 --> 0:07:46.200 University and Nate boy is a good friend and plays 0:07:46.240 --> 0:07:48.240 on the team too, and then he's a big Texas guy. 0:07:48.400 --> 0:07:53.200 So but hey, I love all these is a small Texas. 0:07:53.520 --> 0:07:55.240 It's all for the love of the game, and I 0:07:55.320 --> 0:07:58.000 love to hear what you said about warriors, and it 0:07:58.120 --> 0:08:02.120 is so true the similarities between the field and the 0:08:02.160 --> 0:08:05.520 battlefield depending on which one you fought on. You're there 0:08:05.640 --> 0:08:08.240 next to your brothers and that you're willing to sacrifice 0:08:08.280 --> 0:08:12.200 your body, your pain, your everything to make sure that 0:08:12.240 --> 0:08:15.240 person next to you on either side is protected. And 0:08:15.440 --> 0:08:18.080 what a great thing y'all created in this Flag Football 0:08:18.120 --> 0:08:20.640 League and just bigger and better things coming up. 0:08:20.760 --> 0:08:23.000 That trends Bowl one this year and it's going to 0:08:23.080 --> 0:08:26.320 be aired on Fox. So it be Thursday night before 0:08:26.320 --> 0:08:29.040 the Super Bowl in prime time. You guys get to 0:08:29.080 --> 0:08:31.480 see me and Jake. We got to get in shape 0:08:31.520 --> 0:08:32.640 of a we can't. 0:08:33.040 --> 0:08:33.600 Keep working on. 0:08:33.640 --> 0:08:34.480 I'm in the process. 0:08:34.559 --> 0:08:37.000 I'm in the process too. I haven't lifted anything heavy 0:08:37.080 --> 0:08:40.400 or ran accelerated my heart beat in three years. We're 0:08:40.400 --> 0:08:41.120 about to change that. 0:08:41.920 --> 0:08:45.400 Awesome. Let's do it well, Bja. It is an honor 0:08:45.559 --> 0:08:47.640 to have you on our show. We are so privileged 0:08:47.679 --> 0:08:49.920 to hear your story and have you open up about 0:08:49.920 --> 0:08:54.360 how a wrinkly English bulldog from a trailer park in 0:08:54.400 --> 0:09:00.360 Wisconsin with zero special training actually saved your life. 0:09:00.480 --> 0:09:03.079 I had joined the Marines in nineteen ninety six, served 0:09:03.120 --> 0:09:05.240 on active duty for four years, got off the State 0:09:05.280 --> 0:09:08.680 and ready reserves, took a job in Corporate America because 0:09:08.679 --> 0:09:10.440 you know, I was going to climb that corporate ladder 0:09:10.520 --> 0:09:14.280 and be a bad marine on the side. So it 0:09:14.480 --> 0:09:17.359 life was good, that's right. So I got out December 0:09:17.520 --> 0:09:20.480 of two thousand and obviously nine months later the whole 0:09:20.480 --> 0:09:24.280 world changed, but nine to eleven. We got activated in 0:09:24.320 --> 0:09:27.080 two thousand and four, and I had been operating in 0:09:27.200 --> 0:09:29.480 country as an infantry unit that I was assigned to 0:09:29.520 --> 0:09:33.160 as a platoon sergeant, third Platoon, Golf Company, second Battalion, 0:09:33.200 --> 0:09:36.800 twenty fourth Marines Baby and been operating for three months. 0:09:36.920 --> 0:09:39.440 We lived underneath the bridge. We always had a squad 0:09:39.480 --> 0:09:42.920 on rest, a squad on patrol, and a squad on security. 0:09:43.160 --> 0:09:46.000 I drove every single patrol. It helped to keep continuity. 0:09:47.320 --> 0:09:49.680 The terrorists were good at what they did. They would 0:09:49.760 --> 0:09:52.200 pattern us, and it's easy to fall into patterns, and 0:09:52.280 --> 0:09:54.719 so by maintaining the lead vehicle, I was able to 0:09:54.800 --> 0:09:58.079 keep us from falling into those patterns, and it helped 0:09:58.080 --> 0:10:01.800 me to stay productive. On Thanksgiving night of two thousand 0:10:01.800 --> 0:10:06.839 and four, our regular patrol and lo and behold, the 0:10:06.920 --> 0:10:09.319 terrorists got one in on me. They killed my gunner 0:10:09.360 --> 0:10:12.439 Ryan Catafia. With that attack. It was three one five 0:10:12.600 --> 0:10:16.320 five Russian made artillery shells tied to a tripwire, so 0:10:16.360 --> 0:10:18.160 as soon as my vehicle went through, it went off 0:10:18.200 --> 0:10:24.040 right on my door. So I had three shards of 0:10:24.040 --> 0:10:26.880 glass in my left eye, a huge piece of shrapnel 0:10:26.920 --> 0:10:29.600 in the sappy plate, which is the metal plate within 0:10:29.679 --> 0:10:32.760 your flack jacket, a bunch of other shrapnel, and the 0:10:32.880 --> 0:10:36.640 right leg and my left foot was just demolished by 0:10:36.679 --> 0:10:39.120 the shrapnel that came in, so I knew it wasn't good. 0:10:39.559 --> 0:10:43.400 There was a small ambush, small arms fire that came 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:46.400 in the guys on the patrol and the Quick Reaction 0:10:46.480 --> 0:10:50.240 Force got there. The QRF Quick Reaction Force showed up 0:10:50.320 --> 0:10:53.600 quelled it. I remember listening to the black Hawk flying above, 0:10:53.720 --> 0:10:55.439 but they weren't going to land the helicopter in a 0:10:55.480 --> 0:10:58.080 hot LZ, so they trucked me out And it was 0:10:58.120 --> 0:11:01.760 at Saint Michael and Mama that it started to dawn 0:11:01.840 --> 0:11:05.360 on me that I ain't coming back to the bridge 0:11:05.800 --> 0:11:09.640 and that everything that I just spent nine years working 0:11:09.679 --> 0:11:13.200 for and training for and being ready for is over, 0:11:15.760 --> 0:11:18.520 and that was a hard pill to swallow. I remember 0:11:18.559 --> 0:11:21.640 being on the helicopter and I was bandaged up. My 0:11:21.679 --> 0:11:23.720 one eye was still open. It was a clear night 0:11:24.160 --> 0:11:28.319 with a full moon. It's almost like it's daylight. How 0:11:29.160 --> 0:11:32.480 bright it was when with the stars are out and 0:11:32.559 --> 0:11:35.440 the moon's out, And so I remember watching the moon 0:11:36.200 --> 0:11:40.960 through those blades as they're rotating and just thinking, damn, 0:11:41.200 --> 0:11:44.320 I wish I was dead to say that now, after 0:11:44.400 --> 0:11:46.240 all the growth that they're all the work that we've 0:11:46.240 --> 0:11:52.520 put into, it's still embarrassing, but it's no less true. 0:11:52.679 --> 0:11:59.640 It's the worst feeling in the world. Anxiety, panic, fear, failure. 0:12:00.920 --> 0:12:05.520 It's the fifty guys that were under that bridge. I mean, 0:12:05.559 --> 0:12:09.240 we were closer than most families, no matter where you're from. 0:12:09.520 --> 0:12:11.760 That was a hard thing to get pulled from. And 0:12:11.800 --> 0:12:14.400 it made me feel like this isn't the way it's 0:12:14.440 --> 0:12:15.640 supposed to happen. 0:12:15.800 --> 0:12:18.240 Right, Because what's supposed to happen is you protect your 0:12:18.240 --> 0:12:21.000 fellow marines, you complete your mission, and you get yourself 0:12:21.040 --> 0:12:22.360 back alive in one piece. 0:12:22.559 --> 0:12:24.640 And you have to be convicted in that mindset. 0:12:25.520 --> 0:12:27.880 In order to take on this role as a United 0:12:27.880 --> 0:12:33.880 States Marine, you have to assume an arrogance. I am 0:12:33.920 --> 0:12:37.439 the Arnold Schwarzenegger of this movie, and yes, the other 0:12:37.440 --> 0:12:40.440 people are the extress right. This is why I think 0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:44.400 people have this negative connotation about military people, especially if 0:12:44.440 --> 0:12:48.800 you're a fighter, pilot, infantry or ranger, your whatever. You 0:12:48.960 --> 0:12:52.679 have to adopt this arrogance or else that environment is 0:12:52.720 --> 0:12:53.880 going to eat you alive. 0:12:54.520 --> 0:12:57.280 I can obviously, yeah, absolutely, And I know what three one, 0:12:57.400 --> 0:13:02.160 five us feel like. I mean the same same size mom. 0:13:02.559 --> 0:13:05.160 I guarantee you even beginning to tell this, you haven't 0:13:05.200 --> 0:13:06.480 even thought about the physical pain. 0:13:06.640 --> 0:13:08.960 No, and I still don't even remember the physical pain. 0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:12.239 What PTSD for me has nothing to do with nightmares 0:13:12.400 --> 0:13:17.000 or having trouble with fireworks or I miss being there. 0:13:17.600 --> 0:13:20.240 I was in my place as a platoon's argent. Like, 0:13:20.320 --> 0:13:24.760 unless you're there and you've done that job, when other people, 0:13:24.760 --> 0:13:26.640 once you dead, want the people that you're there to 0:13:26.720 --> 0:13:31.600 care for dead. When you have to meet with people's families, mothers, wives, 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:34.760 grandparents a lot of times and know that these people 0:13:34.840 --> 0:13:38.520 are in your care, it's all consuming. It's really hard 0:13:38.559 --> 0:13:41.720 to explain to people that haven't been there and haven't 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:45.480 experienced the First time we got shot at, I thought 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:47.959 we ran over a bunch of rocks. And then when 0:13:47.960 --> 0:13:51.120 I get to the bridge. My vehicle is leaking from everywhere, 0:13:51.120 --> 0:13:53.120 and I realized, oh, that's what it sounds like to 0:13:53.120 --> 0:13:56.280 get shot at. Before that, I was just thinking about movies. 0:13:56.360 --> 0:13:58.320 Right when it pans back to the bad guys and 0:13:58.360 --> 0:14:00.480 you hear the report and the guy I always know 0:14:00.480 --> 0:14:02.560 what to duck because there goes that it doesn't work 0:14:02.600 --> 0:14:04.760 that all of a sudden, shit just starts blowing up 0:14:04.800 --> 0:14:07.520 around you, or like dust starts flying, or things start 0:14:07.520 --> 0:14:12.120 getting knocked over, and you realize, oh, craps, or you 0:14:12.120 --> 0:14:13.800 hear like snaps happening around you. 0:14:14.320 --> 0:14:17.520 And that's the distinct sound that they make is way 0:14:17.559 --> 0:14:18.240 different than. 0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:24.360 The higher Yeah, one hundred percent. So it's really hard 0:14:24.480 --> 0:14:29.080 to explain why you would want to be in that. 0:14:29.960 --> 0:14:33.800 So you're there, You're on the helicopter. You're the Schwarzenegger 0:14:33.840 --> 0:14:36.920 of your own movie. This isn't like any movie you've 0:14:36.920 --> 0:14:39.920 ever seen before. Talk to me about when the pain's 0:14:39.920 --> 0:14:40.240 set in. 0:14:42.600 --> 0:14:44.680 The pain I remember most and the pain that I 0:14:44.760 --> 0:14:48.040 still carry with me is the pain from I only 0:14:48.120 --> 0:14:52.480 have a half a combat deployment. But there was other pains. 0:14:52.640 --> 0:14:56.040 Right My first amputation is at the ankle, only took 0:14:56.240 --> 0:14:58.280 the foot. I remember the doctor's asking me on the 0:14:58.360 --> 0:15:01.000 table should we take it at the ankle or the knee? 0:15:01.000 --> 0:15:03.680 And I'm looking at them, going, are you serious? Like 0:15:03.800 --> 0:15:06.120 you guys went to medical school. I don't know. 0:15:06.520 --> 0:15:07.320 I'm whip a coin. 0:15:07.400 --> 0:15:09.200 I don't know. Doctor. I'm like, save as much as 0:15:09.240 --> 0:15:10.920 you can. That's all I really understood. 0:15:11.040 --> 0:15:13.280 Yeah, could you just clip the tonehels exactly? 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:14.960 Can you patch it up and send me back out? 0:15:15.080 --> 0:15:17.080 Is that an option? And I remember what sold me 0:15:17.200 --> 0:15:20.680 on keeping it at the ankle was a guy one 0:15:20.720 --> 0:15:23.280 of the teams of doctors at Bethesda, because that's where 0:15:23.280 --> 0:15:25.880 they finalized the surgery. He was like, Hey, if you 0:15:25.920 --> 0:15:27.240 have to get up in the middle night to pee, 0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:29.560 you kind of have a human peg leg to bounce 0:15:29.640 --> 0:15:31.680 off of and you don't have to put on a prosthetic. 0:15:32.480 --> 0:15:34.280 That made enough sense to me, so I kept it there. 0:15:34.480 --> 0:15:35.720 How did you do in the hospital? 0:15:35.840 --> 0:15:40.160 I only was in Walter Reed and Bethesda for about 0:15:40.240 --> 0:15:43.800 ten months. Most people with an amputation were there. 0:15:44.120 --> 0:15:46.200 Yeah, I mean to put it in perspective, I was 0:15:46.640 --> 0:15:50.200 eighteen months. Yeah, ten months is crazy fast. 0:15:50.520 --> 0:15:52.240 So you were on a fast track to get out 0:15:52.280 --> 0:15:54.280 of that hospital and figure out what does life look 0:15:54.400 --> 0:15:54.680 like now? 0:15:55.360 --> 0:15:57.560 But as a twenty eight year old man with an 0:15:57.600 --> 0:16:02.440 amputation at the ankle where prosthetics have to build underneath, 0:16:03.280 --> 0:16:05.800 I was constantly off balance. I was gaining weight. I 0:16:05.840 --> 0:16:07.960 couldn't really be as active as I wanted to be, 0:16:08.880 --> 0:16:11.000 and you can't be the person that you want to 0:16:11.000 --> 0:16:13.120 be at this time. Dylan and Mackenzie are my only 0:16:13.160 --> 0:16:16.360 two kids, but they're nine and seven. I'm not able 0:16:16.440 --> 0:16:19.120 to play with them in that way, so that forces 0:16:19.200 --> 0:16:24.000 me to dive into work more. I'm working for craft Foods. 0:16:24.320 --> 0:16:26.920 I'm driving myself up that corporate ladder. I'm going to 0:16:27.000 --> 0:16:30.000 school at the same time, like I am diving full 0:16:30.080 --> 0:16:32.560 force in to find a different identity. I had already 0:16:32.560 --> 0:16:35.440 gotten a convalescent leave to be home around Christmas in 0:16:35.560 --> 0:16:39.880 New Year's and you feel like an alien in your 0:16:39.920 --> 0:16:41.920 own community. In your own community, I got a wound 0:16:42.000 --> 0:16:44.600 back on. I don't even have, like my stuff's not 0:16:44.720 --> 0:16:47.240 even all the way sewn up, which is fine because 0:16:47.280 --> 0:16:49.640 they have to do that. And I was the one 0:16:49.680 --> 0:16:51.840 forcing to be home, Like How'm I gonna get my 0:16:51.920 --> 0:16:54.160 whole family? Both Jake, you and I would come from 0:16:54.160 --> 0:16:57.920 big families, right, and they would come and crash well 0:16:58.000 --> 0:16:58.960 to read them, but does. 0:16:58.880 --> 0:17:03.320 The absolutely I mean, my family descended upon Bethesda with 0:17:03.440 --> 0:17:07.640 vengeance from Louisiana and Texas, and we're like, hey, we're here, 0:17:07.840 --> 0:17:10.960 still supporting. We're not real sure it looks the same, 0:17:11.240 --> 0:17:13.720 and we don't know how to behave or act or 0:17:13.800 --> 0:17:16.520 what we're supposed to do. And you know, our only 0:17:16.560 --> 0:17:19.800 biggest complaints could we get some better food. I mean, 0:17:19.920 --> 0:17:22.320 I wasn't. I never ate because I was just high 0:17:22.359 --> 0:17:24.760 all the time and I just wanted cappuccinos and gatorades. 0:17:25.000 --> 0:17:27.879 But it was an adjustment for everybody because how do 0:17:27.960 --> 0:17:31.879 we support in this new support role? How do we behave? 0:17:32.240 --> 0:17:34.399 Is it the same as before or is it different now? 0:17:34.440 --> 0:17:36.280 What does our new normal look like? And it was 0:17:36.440 --> 0:17:39.840 just a constant pivot on the fly, trying to establish 0:17:39.960 --> 0:17:42.640 what our new normal looks like. And then a big 0:17:42.760 --> 0:17:46.520 frustration was they were treating me like this delicate little 0:17:46.560 --> 0:17:49.639 flower who was also this hero, right, and it's like no, no, no, 0:17:49.760 --> 0:17:52.040 no no, I just had a bad day. I mean 0:17:52.119 --> 0:17:54.680 this is I was just doing my job. And that's 0:17:54.760 --> 0:17:57.720 a very frustrating thing because you expect them to understand 0:17:57.800 --> 0:18:01.000 when they don't have the ability to understand, right, And. 0:18:01.040 --> 0:18:03.560 Where I was even more angry is at Walter Reed. 0:18:03.640 --> 0:18:05.240 This is two thousand and four, so this is the 0:18:05.320 --> 0:18:06.760 height of it. But this is when I first meet 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:10.440 President bush Is in Bethesda, and that was okay, but 0:18:10.520 --> 0:18:12.560 I had a real problem with it. There's all these 0:18:12.560 --> 0:18:14.320 people want to come in and take pictures for me, 0:18:14.440 --> 0:18:16.000 and they're all saying and all the letters, and I 0:18:16.280 --> 0:18:20.400 appreciate all the support. The reason I tell the story 0:18:20.480 --> 0:18:22.440 and the struggles with it is that was part of 0:18:22.480 --> 0:18:24.200 the problem. We were all of a sudden being treated 0:18:24.280 --> 0:18:26.760 as celebrities. A lot of these guys are really young guys, 0:18:27.640 --> 0:18:29.800 and you've got a lot of support systems that are 0:18:29.840 --> 0:18:31.720 really young, like a lot of people that got married 0:18:32.200 --> 0:18:34.879 just before he goes away. You're seeing a lot of 0:18:34.920 --> 0:18:38.560 that stuff unravel. It unsettled me because I wasn't ready. 0:18:38.640 --> 0:18:41.800 I was already displaced, and I already had anger issues. 0:18:42.040 --> 0:18:43.560 That's why I needed to get out, because I was 0:18:43.640 --> 0:18:45.720 going to lash out, and I knew that wasn't a 0:18:45.840 --> 0:18:49.720 smart thing to do. But you were seeing it. You 0:18:49.760 --> 0:18:53.720 were seeing the men trying to stay there longer because 0:18:54.880 --> 0:18:56.359 they were a celebrity and they knew when they went 0:18:56.400 --> 0:18:58.879 home it was going to be quiet. That's what it is. 0:18:59.000 --> 0:19:01.800 So I go back to what I know. I'm coming 0:19:01.880 --> 0:19:03.960 home and I'm trying to find a new purpose in 0:19:04.080 --> 0:19:06.760 life because the one I had, the one I put 0:19:06.800 --> 0:19:10.159 all my chips on, gone gone, and I didn't have 0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:13.520 the mindset to be prepared for that. So that first 0:19:13.600 --> 0:19:18.200 convalescent leave, it's surreal being home because you still don't 0:19:18.240 --> 0:19:21.280 feel right being there, but you're also at the same 0:19:21.320 --> 0:19:22.960 time happy to be there. 0:19:23.320 --> 0:19:27.240 I remember with me, I was consistently uncomfortable, but content 0:19:27.440 --> 0:19:28.200 all the time. 0:19:28.320 --> 0:19:30.200 All the same time. It's hard to put into words. 0:19:31.359 --> 0:19:33.719 This is around Christmas time and all that stuff. Right, 0:19:34.200 --> 0:19:36.600 I'm a kid from Georgia. I grew up in Savannah, Georgia, 0:19:36.600 --> 0:19:40.120 a huge Georgia Bulldogs fan, like the National Championship Georgia Bulldogs, 0:19:40.160 --> 0:19:43.960 not like Texas Longhorns. It you did, didn't you? 0:19:44.119 --> 0:19:44.399 Dang it? 0:19:44.480 --> 0:19:45.160 She got it back. 0:19:45.800 --> 0:19:49.280 If I remember correctly, Bevo almost killed the dog. 0:19:49.480 --> 0:19:52.640 Yeah, exactly so. And I was also the United States 0:19:52.720 --> 0:19:55.760 Marines and the English bulldog is the mascot, so of 0:19:55.840 --> 0:19:59.159 course I want an English bulldog. Now you look for 0:19:59.240 --> 0:20:02.960 true English bulldo and they are very expensive. Right, that's 0:20:03.040 --> 0:20:06.320 not happening I didn't know of the shelters and stuff 0:20:06.359 --> 0:20:08.640 that I know of. Now you know, I'm in the industry. 0:20:09.040 --> 0:20:11.400 So I go onto Craigslist and I find this guy 0:20:11.560 --> 0:20:15.639 is selling old English bulldog puppies for like eight hundred 0:20:15.680 --> 0:20:19.920 bucks something like that. Still super cheap, is still expensive. 0:20:20.000 --> 0:20:22.920 But I go to this trailer park in Wisconsin that 0:20:23.080 --> 0:20:25.120 has like a pole shed in the back where these 0:20:25.240 --> 0:20:28.680 puppies are, and I'm not using a wheelchair, but I'm 0:20:28.760 --> 0:20:31.440