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Speaker 1: Welcome back to the show. What we're gonna do here

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Speaker 1: is answer some questions you email us podcast at grangersmith

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Speaker 1: dot com. We answer them like we're riding in the

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Speaker 1: truck together, like we're sitting around a campfire. You say, hey, man,

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Speaker 1: I got this thing it's been going on. Can you

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Speaker 1: help me with it? I got a man with me,

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Speaker 1: producer of the show and one of my best friends.

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Speaker 1: What's up an Good to see you man, You too,

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Speaker 1: there we I don't know a lot about these questions

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Speaker 1: that people have sent in for today's show, but I

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Speaker 1: do know enough that there is there is a bit

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Speaker 1: of a theme going on. There is, and so we'll

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Speaker 1: see how that unravels.

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Speaker 2: It's funny, it wasn't on purpose too. I read through

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Speaker 2: these and put them in in what we call an ROS.

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Speaker 2: That's a run a show for uh, for these for you,

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Speaker 2: And I'm not thinking about answering them necessarily when I'm

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Speaker 2: putting them together. I'm thinking about, this'd be a good

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Speaker 2: one to hear from granger on and then I get

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Speaker 2: to stay here and talk to you about them, so

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Speaker 2: I can read them and rethink you know about them.

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Speaker 1: So yep, So let's see if we can unravel this theme.

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Speaker 1: The first questionnaire comes from Kyle. It says, Hey, Granger,

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Speaker 1: I'll get right into it. My wife and I haven't

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Speaker 1: been getting along lately. She says things like I hate

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Speaker 1: you and go shoot yourself, and that she wants a divorce.

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Speaker 1: Me personally, I don't believe in divorce. I love her

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Speaker 1: with all of my being, but her being so mean

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Speaker 1: takes a toll on me. Usually the day after she

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Speaker 1: says how much she loves me and that she doesn't

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Speaker 1: want to split up, but it always comes back. We

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Speaker 1: did marriage counseling three sessions and she quit. I ended

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Speaker 1: up going back by myself because I'm trying to better myself.

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Speaker 1: My question is, do you believe it's okay to file

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Speaker 1: for divorce because of the way I'm being treated. I

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Speaker 1: just want what's best for my children. Thank you for

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Speaker 1: your time. Sorry, this is really hard to talk about.

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Speaker 1: Kyle from Ohio. All right, thanks for being vulnerable. Kyle,

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Speaker 1: appreciate the email. And there's nothing in here that's that's

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Speaker 1: asking if this is biblical or if he's a Christian. Right,

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Speaker 1: So that's a little bit different perspective. Because we're gonna

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Speaker 1: come to this podcast with a biblical worldview. And so Kyle,

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Speaker 1: without you mentioning that some of the stuff I say

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Speaker 1: may not make sense to you, but it's okay, that's okay,

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Speaker 1: still applies, it still applies. But this is where it

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Speaker 1: gets This is where it gets really wonky with you, Kyle,

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Speaker 1: is I'm gonna I'm gonna look at from from the

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Speaker 1: point of view of you being involved in a church,

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Speaker 1: which really changes the dynamic of this because it's Christians.

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Speaker 1: I can't say this enough on this podcast, and I'll

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Speaker 1: probably say it more on this exact episode. Christians shouldn't

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Speaker 1: go through divorce alone. It's not advised in any way

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Speaker 1: that you should go through divorce alone. You should do

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Speaker 1: it with your brothers and sisters around you, which is

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Speaker 1: so encouraging. So with that in mind, let's dive into

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Speaker 1: this question. First. First thing on that comes to my

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Speaker 1: mind is you say, Kyle, I just want what's best

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Speaker 1: for my children. But that kind of contradicts a little

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Speaker 1: bit to what he says earlier when he says I

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Speaker 1: don't believe in divorce. I love her with all with

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Speaker 1: all of my being. Okay, So which one do we

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Speaker 1: want here? Which one is it?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? And he's working on himself.

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Speaker 1: And he's working on himself, so that we have a

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Speaker 1: little bit of a contradiction. Because if you only want

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Speaker 1: want what's best for your children's that's one direction. If

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Speaker 1: you only you love her with all of your being,

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Speaker 1: that's another, And if you want to work on yourself,

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Speaker 1: that's a third way. My suggestion is, and my encouragement

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Speaker 1: is that if you want what's best for your children,

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Speaker 1: that is reconciliation in the marriage agreed. Ok, Okay, So

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Speaker 1: you reconciling with the biological mama is better for them

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Speaker 1: then you divorcing and trying to figure out a way

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Speaker 1: to do what's best for them. That's not always the case.

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Speaker 1: That's not always the answer. That's not that's just not

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Speaker 1: that's not a cookie cutter cutter answer because, first of all,

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Speaker 1: most practically a lot of times reconciliation is not possible.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, sometimes it's not. When I read this email, I

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Speaker 2: read it one way again, you know, for the podcast,

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Speaker 2: but reading it as a response, the first thing I

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Speaker 2: see is she's hurting somewhere and she's lashing out at you.

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Speaker 2: And you know, we just went through we're going through

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Speaker 2: proverbs at church, and one of the biggest things we

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Speaker 2: talked about a couple of weeks ago, the life and

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Speaker 2: death being in the power of your tongue. With the

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Speaker 2: same tongue you give life and the same tongue you

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Speaker 2: give death. You curse somebody and you give life to somebody.

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Speaker 2: And when you're spewing out stuff that is hateful, like

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Speaker 2: go shoot yourself and I hate you, that's coming from

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Speaker 2: something in your heart that is disturbed. And so there's

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Speaker 2: some hurt with her somewhere. And I don't know if

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Speaker 2: it's in this marriage, if it's for the marriage, or

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Speaker 2: what it is. You know, we assume a lot with

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Speaker 2: these emails because there you know, what is this? You know,

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Speaker 2: seven six lines long, you know, to diagnose an entire

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Speaker 2: issue with the marriage. But there's something going here. It's

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Speaker 2: not I mean, it is salvageable from what I read.

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Speaker 2: I believe if if you both want it to be.

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Speaker 2: I mean, sometimes you do get to a place where

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Speaker 2: one of you wants it with all your heart and

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Speaker 2: the other one says, I just don't love you and

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Speaker 2: I don't want to be part of this anymore. What

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Speaker 2: do you do then? And maybe that's where we are

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Speaker 2: with this one as well. I come from a divorced family,

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Speaker 2: and I am divorce myself, a biblical divorce. But no

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Speaker 2: matter what, it's hard. And ultimately, listen, if if it's

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Speaker 2: gonna be hard no matter what, choose the hard one

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Speaker 2: that keeps things together if you can, m because it's

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Speaker 2: gonna be hard either way. You're you're doing one battle

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Speaker 2: that's really hard without a helper anymore. And you might

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Speaker 2: feel like you don't have a helper right now. But

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Speaker 2: if you can salvage and get your helper back in

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Speaker 2: that marriage, it is going to help make things better

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Speaker 2: and it's worth.

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Speaker 1: The fight for sure. That's a great way to look

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Speaker 1: at it. So it's gonna be hard, Kyle, It's gonna

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Speaker 1: be hard no matter which road you pick right now.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna be hard in the road to restoration, and

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Speaker 1: it's gonna be hard in the road and being a

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Speaker 1: single dad and starting over. Sure, and man saying from experience,

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Speaker 1: since they're both hard, choose the one that's on the

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Speaker 1: road to reconciliation. Is that what you're saying?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, sure, if you can. And I say if

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Speaker 2: you can, because some decisions just aren't up to you.

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Speaker 2: Have you done everything that are you in a church?

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Speaker 2: Do you have brothers? See part of mine involved things

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Speaker 2: at a church, and so it makes it it made

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Speaker 2: it hard for me to trust a church, not God,

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Speaker 2: but a church for a long long time. And even

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Speaker 2: so much as we are just now really getting settled

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Speaker 2: in a church that I fully am ready to be

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Speaker 2: plugged into a church. Healthy church, absolutely, and that's very important.

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Speaker 2: So I mean my first advice is where is just

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Speaker 2: the question of where are you going? Where are you

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Speaker 2: going to church? If you're not well, that's you need

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Speaker 2: to get plugged in somewhere that's a healthy place.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Side note another episode, possibly there is a big

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Speaker 1: difference everyone between a healthy church and an unhealthy church.

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Speaker 1: So if you have church hurt, if you look back

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Speaker 1: and you go, I don't like the church because it

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Speaker 1: did this and this, I would say there's a just

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Speaker 1: as there's a difference between an unhealthy doctor or a

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Speaker 1: bad practicing doctor and a good doctor, there is the

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Speaker 1: same thing with a massive of chasm between an unhealthy

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Speaker 1: church and a healthy church. Now we could do this

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Speaker 1: on another episode and actually walk through what it looks

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Speaker 1: like to be a healthy church, because you might think

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Speaker 1: that you're in one and it actually might not be

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Speaker 1: biblically healthy. We could do this in another episode, but

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Speaker 1: that's a side note to what you're saying. So here's

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Speaker 1: the major problem. Looks like there's a lot of problems,

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Speaker 1: but one of them they did counseling three sessions and

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Speaker 1: she quit. She left, so he goes back by himself. Now,

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Speaker 1: what do you think, Amy, What do you say to

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Speaker 1: a separation to begin this process?

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Speaker 2: What do you mean to like start.

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Speaker 1: To say before we file, we should live separately? What

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Speaker 1: do you think about that?

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Speaker 2: Man? It's hard to reconcile when you're not together. Okay,

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Speaker 2: I believe, because yeah, I think you know, should you

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Speaker 2: have some alone time? Absolutely? I think separating in one

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Speaker 2: person living in one house and somebody listens living somewhere else.

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Speaker 2: I believe it's like move you're moving towards staying separated

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Speaker 2: versus moving towards staying together.

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Speaker 1: Unless there's abuse, of course. Yeah, yeah, so that's the

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Speaker 1: caveat Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Of course. Yeah. If you're being abused, that's a that's

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Speaker 2: a completely different conversation too.

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Speaker 1: Uh.

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Speaker 2: And this is some verbal abuse. I mean obviously here,

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Speaker 2: nine times out of ten I would say that that

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Speaker 2: separating some people wake up and go, oh, man, I

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Speaker 2: can't do this by myself. And if if that, you know,

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Speaker 2: that is good for to get that revelation.

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Speaker 1: But so I think he's asking one specific question. My

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Speaker 1: question is do you believe it's okay to file for

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Speaker 1: divorce because of the way I'm being treated? I just

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Speaker 1: want what's best for my children. That's the question. And

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Speaker 1: I think because there's so many unknowns, we don't get

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Speaker 1: to follow up question. We don't know the situation. We

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Speaker 1: don't know anything, Kyle. I don't even know if this

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Speaker 1: is your first wife or not. I don't know if

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Speaker 1: it's if these are your children and not hers. It

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Speaker 1: may be some scenarios this is his children from a

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Speaker 1: previous marriage that puts a new spend. So because I

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Speaker 1: don't know anything about this, I really only have one

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Speaker 1: piece of advice, and that is, don't make this decision

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Speaker 1: outside of wise counsel.

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Speaker 2: Agreed, agreed, and that would you know? I think that

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Speaker 2: that is the answer to this email. It is like

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Speaker 2: that this has to go much deeper. This conversation has

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Speaker 2: to go much deeper with someone that you trust with

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Speaker 2: And if you're going to a counselor what kind of

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Speaker 2: counselor too, make sure they're Bible believing counseling.

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Speaker 1: And I also and part of what I mean by that,

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Speaker 1: I'm talking about a team, and so I'm not just

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Speaker 1: talking about professional, paid counseling. I'm talking about wise counsel

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Speaker 1: in the aspect of friends, trusted brothers around you. So

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Speaker 1: my answer, Kyle, my direct answer to dude, your question

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Speaker 1: is is it okay to file for divorce because of

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Speaker 1: the way I'm being treated? No without wise counsel. Yes,

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Speaker 1: with wise counsel. So it can go either way. But

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Speaker 1: if you don't have wise counsel, throw this whole question out.

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Speaker 1: If you do and they advise you need to walk away,

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Speaker 1: then I would say you could trust them in this.

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Speaker 1: She's abandoned you. There's abuse, verbal abuse. If you're with

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Speaker 1: wise counsel and they say no, don't file for divorce,

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Speaker 1: I would trust them on that as well. There's room

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Speaker 1: for reconciliation. But ant man and I don't know enough

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Speaker 1: about it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think the next question or the advice

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Speaker 2: would be, is, like or I would ask you, is

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Speaker 2: how does he find that? How does he find that

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Speaker 2: wise counsel if he's not in a church if they

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Speaker 2: didn't grow up in that, how does he go find

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Speaker 2: wise counsel?

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Speaker 1: Right now, this is something that we should be preparing

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Speaker 1: before we end up in the situation, right This is

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Speaker 1: this is when you know CPR before you have to

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Speaker 1: use it. And so this is why this is reason

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Speaker 1: number eight hundre seventy five whire being involved in a

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Speaker 1: meaningful relationship with a good, solid, healthy Bible teaching church

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Speaker 1: is so important. It is a among other things. It's

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Speaker 1: a tribe.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure.

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Speaker 1: It's being in a tribe, which humans for centuries and

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Speaker 1: centuries millennia have been involved in a tribe, even when

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Speaker 1: it's outside of the context of what a Christian church is.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about Native American Indians. We're in tribes and

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Speaker 1: that those tribes. Sorry I have an airplane voice here,

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Speaker 1: I just got off the airplane. So these tribes operated

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Speaker 1: multi generations. They weren't age segregated like we're so quick

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Speaker 1: in society today to age segregate. Put the youth over here,

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Speaker 1: Put the toddlers in this room, Put the babies here,

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Speaker 1: put the put the nursing mothers here, Put the young

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Speaker 1: adults in this room. Put these seniors over in this room,

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Speaker 1: and we segregate everyone, so no one is learning from

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Speaker 1: each other. And for millennia, humans have learned from each

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Speaker 1: other without age segregating. So now here we are and

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Speaker 1: we're stuck in these situations where someone goes, I'm going

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Speaker 1: through this big problem, granger, I'm going through this divorce,

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Speaker 1: and I have no one.

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Speaker 2: To talk to.

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Speaker 1: That's because our culture has age segregated. You have no

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Speaker 1: wise counsel, you have no tribe. The best we do

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Speaker 1: with tribes sometimes is the youth baseball team that your

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Speaker 1: kid plays for. That's your tribe. Even worse, social media,

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Speaker 1: even worse, your social media is your tribe. So a man,

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Speaker 1: your question is what do you do if you're already

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Speaker 1: in a situation where you don't have your tribe, you

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Speaker 1: don't have your wise counsel, and you need to make

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Speaker 1: a decision now. And to that, I say, this is

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Speaker 1: doing CPR without ever taking a class. It's very hard.

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Speaker 1: There's not a right or wrong answer to this, but

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Speaker 1: it's very difficult. So if you're listening and you're not

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Speaker 1: in the situation, find your tribe. And I would say,

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Speaker 1: above all, a good Bible believing, healthy church is your tribe.

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Speaker 1: That's that's what they're that's what that's how they function

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Speaker 1: in the many ways that a church functions. It's this,

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Speaker 1: it's your family.

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Speaker 2: I think that's our responsibility is man too. That's part

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Speaker 2: of leadership and leading your family is wondering what you're

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Speaker 2: supposed to be doing. Well, you know, I don't have

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Speaker 2: an issue right now that that I have to address.

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Speaker 2: What should I be doing? Things like that? Yeah, looking

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Speaker 2: for things where you find your weaknesses. Where are you

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Speaker 2: weak right now? Fill those holes? Fill those gaps for

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Speaker 2: you and your family.

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Speaker 1: If you want to know who to pick for your

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Speaker 1: wise counsel, you look at their fruits of their life. Yes,

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Speaker 1: for sure, not just because they're easy to talk to.

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Speaker 1: Are there good listeners? Are they're cool people? Or their

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Speaker 1: proximity that their next door neighbors to you look at

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Speaker 1: the fruits of their life and go, hey, brother, it

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Speaker 1: looks like you have We all have mistakes and we

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Speaker 1: all have a track record, but currently it looks like

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Speaker 1: you have. You have your You're on a good solid tree.

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Speaker 1: You have good fruits coming out from your life. Can

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Speaker 1: you help me with this situation? What do I do

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Speaker 1: and build a tribe in that way? Have you done time.

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Speaker 1: We got it. We let's do another question. Kyle. I

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Speaker 1: hope that's enough for you. Next question from David says,

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Speaker 1: Hello David from Ohio. Me and my fiance are getting

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Speaker 1: married in September. We're both born again Christians and wanted

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Speaker 1: your thoughts on birth control. Should Christians use it? Is

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Speaker 1: it a sin? If we Lord willing have children? I

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Speaker 1: want to give each child enough attention. That's what I'm

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Speaker 1: getting at, He says, thank you. Love to listen to

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Speaker 1: the podcast when I'm on the road as a trucker.

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Speaker 1: God bless all right, David, it's a good question. Then

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Speaker 1: we should be thinking through these things. My first answer is,

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Speaker 1: have your try, have your wise counsel around you. These

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Speaker 1: are great questions.

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Speaker 2: We changed the name of the podcast to wise Counsel.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Granger Smith and the Wise Counsel. It's like the

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Speaker 1: band name. And by the way, I'm not really considered

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Speaker 1: wise counsel because I'm not with these people. I don't

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Speaker 1: know you. So my encouragement is to direct you towards what.

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Speaker 2: Really is why this shouldn't be the sole help.

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Speaker 1: This is not the council. But David, I think it's

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Speaker 1: a great question and we should be We should be

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Speaker 1: thinking through all these things. You say you're a born

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Speaker 1: again Christian, and that's great. This is a this is

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Speaker 1: a form of your sanctification that's weighing on you on

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Speaker 1: theological things, things that matter in life, Having children, planning

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Speaker 1: for children matters, and so you should be questioning everything,

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Speaker 1: not just because that's the way it's done on social media,

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Speaker 1: not because that's the way mom and dad did it.

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Speaker 1: But am I thinking through this from a biblical worldview?

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Speaker 1: So the you know, the heart of man plans his way,

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Speaker 1: but the Lord establishes his steps, the Bible says, So

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Speaker 1: that doesn't mean that we don't plan just because the

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Speaker 1: Lord establishes steps. Or you could say another proverb, the

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Speaker 1: horse is made ready for the day of battle, but

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Speaker 1: the victory belongs to the Lord. That doesn't mean because

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Speaker 1: the victory belongs to the Lord. And because he establishes

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Speaker 1: our steps doesn't mean we don't plan our way, And

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Speaker 1: it doesn't mean we don't prepare the horse for the

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Speaker 1: day of battle. So if you're planning on having children, great,

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Speaker 1: If you plan on separating it out due to finances

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Speaker 1: or which I think is a great point, you make

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Speaker 1: giving enough attention to each child. I don't think there's

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Speaker 1: anything wrong with that, but you're also not The victory

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Speaker 1: is not up to you, and the steps that you

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Speaker 1: take is ultimately not up to you. If you're giving

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Speaker 1: all that up to a sovereign God and going Lord.

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Speaker 1: If it was up to me, I would have children

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Speaker 1: staggered every two years. But Lord is not up to me.

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Speaker 1: So I'm gonna plan like it is up to me.

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Speaker 1: But I'm gonna all always know and acknowledge you are

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Speaker 1: behind all of it, in your sovereignty, in your purpose.

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Speaker 1: I don't think there's anything wrong with that. And so

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Speaker 1: when it comes to birth control, I don't think there's

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Speaker 1: anything wrong. And there would be a gray line if

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Speaker 1: I started to name different kinds of contraceptives, there would

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Speaker 1: be a gray line on what is biblical or not.

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Speaker 1: For instance, the Catholics have long practiced the I don't

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Speaker 1: know the word. What's the feminine calendar? You know when

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Speaker 1: girls have a cycle, sure, and they have a calendar.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what the name is Catholics. Catholics know

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Speaker 1: this that there's a calendar and the woman's cycle is

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Speaker 1: on the calendar, and they could literally say we're safe

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Speaker 1: to have intercourse during these days and these days. This

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Speaker 1: is because Catholics essentially, hey forgive me, I don't know

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Speaker 1: a lot about this, but they don't believe in contraceptive, right. So,

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Speaker 1: but in following the calendar, that is a contra that is,

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Speaker 1: it is a form of s. That's where I'm talking

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Speaker 1: about the gray line is. So we're talking about condoms here,

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Speaker 1: we're talking about following a calendar. I think there's a

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Speaker 1: gray line. Now, you're a lot less likely with the condom,

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Speaker 1: with that contraceptive than you are with an accident with

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Speaker 1: the calendar. But but it's still a gray line here.

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Speaker 1: Here's where I'm gonna draw This is where this is

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Speaker 1: where I draw the line. The line is the what

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Speaker 1: do you call it? A border fashions? What do you

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Speaker 1: call that? What's that word that? The there's pills that

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Speaker 1: are that are cell killing plan B a border of fashions?

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Speaker 1: I think so something like that after you.

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Speaker 2: After you would have sex, you would take a pill

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Speaker 2: to basically kill whatever may have happened here.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So that that's where there's a hard line there

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Speaker 1: For me. I'm not gonna come down on you and say, hey,

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Speaker 1: you and your wife in your in your practical planning,

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Speaker 1: should never use this form of contraception unless it is

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Speaker 1: a board of fashion. I think that's the word. I'm sorry,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, but this is a cell killing poison.

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Speaker 1: I say, do not do that. I am personally against

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Speaker 1: tying tubes. I'm personally against what's the other sectory, the sectomy.

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Speaker 1: I think I think someone could make a biblical argument

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Speaker 1: against me, and I would be I could change my

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Speaker 1: stance on that so that this is not like, this

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Speaker 1: is not black and white. But but here's my point.

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Speaker 1: Here's my point of everything I'm saying. I think it's

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Speaker 1: very important as a family, as a as a you're

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Speaker 1: you're not married yet, you're getting married in September. All

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Speaker 1: these are great conversations to have before you're married and

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Speaker 1: before she has her first baby. Great conversations. Uh, conversations

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Speaker 1: about adoption are great conversations to have. And so as

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Speaker 1: long as you're walking through it, you're praying through it. Lord.

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Speaker 1: We we know that you say we plan our away,

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Speaker 1: but you establish our steps. And so Lord, we're going

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Speaker 1: to plan on staggering two years between babies. We're going

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Speaker 1: to plan on using using a form of contraceptive. So

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Speaker 1: that we could we could uh plan this out. But Lord,

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Speaker 1: will you crush this idea? If this is wrong or

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Speaker 1: if this is not within your will? Were you make

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Speaker 1: sanctify us in a way that just makes us so

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Speaker 1: uneasy and so uncomfortable with this. And you're in wise counsel,

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Speaker 1: You're in your church. You're in your small groups, so

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Speaker 1: your your your gatherings, you're with your pastor or your elders,

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Speaker 1: however you call it in your church, and you're you're

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Speaker 1: talking through this with them and saying where do we

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Speaker 1: draw the line on birth control? And your church may

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Speaker 1: have some kind of established idea of this. And if

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Speaker 1: you love the church and they're a they're they're a

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Speaker 1: healthy church and they have a certain encouragement and they

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Speaker 1: probably do on birth control, go with that. Not what

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Speaker 1: I say on this podcast. But the important thing and

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Speaker 1: the point is you're thinking through this with the biblical worldview,

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Speaker 1: and God will honor that as long as he gets

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Speaker 1: he gets the glory at the end, and you recognize

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Speaker 1: his sovereignty in it.

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Speaker 2: I think the planning is wise. To not plan is reckless.

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Speaker 1: Yeah you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, So that your point is,

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Speaker 1: let's just not not the Lord brings babies, so let's

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Speaker 1: just not worry about it at all. That's the opposite

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Speaker 1: end of the spectrum. And I don't think that's wise either.

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Speaker 2: Right, right, And then you know, we do see that

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Speaker 2: where people just don't care. They're just out for themselves,

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Speaker 2: and you know, and they end up with babies that

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Speaker 2: were unplanned and they have to change change things in

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Speaker 2: their life. Not always a bad thing, obviously, but to

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Speaker 2: not if you're in a healthy relationship, you're getting married,

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Speaker 2: you're talking about having this conversation, you're planning and thinking

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Speaker 2: through stuff, just already on the right track.

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Speaker 1: Yep. If you want to get a hold of me,

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Speaker 1: go to cameo dot com slash granger Smith and I

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Speaker 1: could send you a video message made right here on

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Speaker 1: my phone whatever you want me to say, Happy birthday,

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Speaker 1: happy anniversary. It's a great way for you and I

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Speaker 1: to stay in contact and to get someone a gift

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Speaker 1: that might seem to have everything. Hey, get him a

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Speaker 1: gift at cameo dot com slash Grangersmith. Okay, let's get

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Speaker 1: into this next question. If you have a question for me,

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Speaker 1: by the way, email podcast at grangersmith dot com and

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Speaker 1: the next question here, I just got off an airplane.

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Speaker 1: That's why I have an airplane voice. Is that a thing?

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Speaker 1: Have you heard people say that airplane voice?

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Speaker 2: But it's also I mean, you're now in the business

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Speaker 2: of speaking for a living. This is what it's either

431
00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:41,600
Speaker 2: in front of a front of a crowd, you know, congregation,

432
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:43,639
Speaker 2: what have you. It's here on the podcast, or it's

433
00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:46,120
Speaker 2: on after midnight mornings with Granger, all of it. That's

434
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:48,640
Speaker 2: what you do now, So this is to be expected.

435
00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:52,320
Speaker 1: All I do is talk, and that just leaves it

436
00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:54,199
Speaker 1: all in the hands of the Lord, because if the

437
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:56,399
Speaker 1: Lord wants to shut me up, if he wants to

438
00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:59,400
Speaker 1: shut down everything I do, he just stops my voice

439
00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,840
Speaker 1: and voice and I am done seeing music.

440
00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:02,720
Speaker 2: You still play guitar?

441
00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:07,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I am done if the Lord decides to

442
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:08,360
Speaker 1: ship my voice off.

443
00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:11,119
Speaker 2: Okay.

444
00:24:11,119 --> 00:24:14,679
Speaker 1: The next question comes from Brendan. It says, Grandeur, I'm

445
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:18,120
Speaker 1: a longtime fan of country music, even some of your stuff.

446
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:22,399
Speaker 1: Oh thanks. I'm not the poster child for Christianity, but

447
00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:25,000
Speaker 1: one thing that I've tried to do is watch my language,

448
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:29,280
Speaker 1: especially when in a crowd of people who don't. I

449
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:32,119
Speaker 1: figure it's an easy thing to do, and sometimes in

450
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:35,159
Speaker 1: the room might notice my conviction, and someone in the

451
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:38,120
Speaker 1: room might notice my conviction and find a similar one

452
00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:43,119
Speaker 1: within themselves, or at least see that the profanity is

453
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:46,520
Speaker 1: not adding anything to the conversation. Where I've been finding

454
00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:51,120
Speaker 1: an issue is when I'm working on the farm, often alone,

455
00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:54,959
Speaker 1: and I, for example, drop something on my foot. The

456
00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 1: profanity slips out before I can even think to myself,

457
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:03,520
Speaker 1: don't say that those words in the moment bother me.

458
00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:05,359
Speaker 1: So do you have any advice for a person who

459
00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:09,880
Speaker 1: can control cussing in a crowd but the words are

460
00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:12,440
Speaker 1: enough on the tip of the tongue that they come

461
00:25:12,480 --> 00:25:17,439
Speaker 1: out later, or a mindset you took when you began

462
00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:22,040
Speaker 1: seeing the issue with profanity that helped you. And does

463
00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:24,800
Speaker 1: this mean I can't listen to City Boy Stuck? That's

464
00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:27,560
Speaker 1: part of joke. I listened to a lot of podcasts

465
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:30,560
Speaker 1: when driving. When I climb into the tractor, yours is

466
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:33,640
Speaker 1: the first one I always choose. It takes the relaxation

467
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:36,360
Speaker 1: of the tractor work and combines it with great reflection.

468
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:40,760
Speaker 1: Keep it coming, Brendan See from Kansas, Hey, Brendan, Thanks buddy.

469
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:44,960
Speaker 1: I appreciate the encouragement to me, and I appreciate the question.

470
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:48,480
Speaker 1: I think it's a good question. And I also you

471
00:25:48,520 --> 00:25:50,399
Speaker 1: know what I like to say, I like to see

472
00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:57,320
Speaker 1: is when you say I'm not the poster child for Christianity. Same, yeah, same,

473
00:25:57,720 --> 00:26:01,680
Speaker 1: And I think that should always be our heart position,

474
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:05,920
Speaker 1: the greed. It's like, Lord, I know what you ask

475
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:09,199
Speaker 1: from me, and I see it in your word, and

476
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:13,359
Speaker 1: yet again I have not lived up to your commands,

477
00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:17,680
Speaker 1: to the obedience that you have asked from me as

478
00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:20,200
Speaker 1: a result of the grace that you've given me through

479
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:25,080
Speaker 1: your son. So amen, I'm not either the poster child

480
00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:28,240
Speaker 1: for Christianity. And I think that's a good heart position

481
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:31,600
Speaker 1: for the rest of our lives. Brother, And it's also

482
00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:37,600
Speaker 1: a great question. Your question is basically, look, I'm I'm.

483
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:40,560
Speaker 1: I can pretty much control myself around Mama and Grandma

484
00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:44,159
Speaker 1: when i'm talking, But when I'm out by myself and

485
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:46,439
Speaker 1: I drop a hair on my foot, out comes the

486
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:49,960
Speaker 1: F bomb. How do I fix this? And I think

487
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,760
Speaker 1: it's a good question because Jesus was always after the heart.

488
00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:57,199
Speaker 1: He wasn't after the facade, he wasn't after what you

489
00:26:57,280 --> 00:27:00,280
Speaker 1: do in public. He was after all of you, which

490
00:27:00,280 --> 00:27:02,679
Speaker 1: includes what you do in private. In fact, when it

491
00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:05,800
Speaker 1: comes to sin. He was just as interested, if not more,

492
00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:09,240
Speaker 1: interested in what you do in private, because that truly

493
00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:12,439
Speaker 1: reveals who you are. And so I think it's a

494
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:17,160
Speaker 1: great question to be thinking through. How do I control

495
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:24,159
Speaker 1: myself in private, not just in public. And it's so

496
00:27:24,280 --> 00:27:28,000
Speaker 1: interesting when people say this is not you, Brendan, but

497
00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:31,080
Speaker 1: when people say things like, man, I just I can't

498
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:33,639
Speaker 1: control what I say. I am what I am, and

499
00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 1: I always think I have no filter. Yeah, I have

500
00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:39,560
Speaker 1: no filter. And I always think everyone has a filter.

501
00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:44,760
Speaker 1: You wouldn't go to the the superintendent of your school

502
00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:47,960
Speaker 1: district and draw F bombs. You probably wouldn't say it

503
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:50,960
Speaker 1: around your grandma, depending on your grandma. If you went

504
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:54,879
Speaker 1: to a cocktail dinner with the governor of your state

505
00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:58,000
Speaker 1: and you got five minutes with him, you probably wouldn't

506
00:27:58,040 --> 00:28:01,960
Speaker 1: drop the F bomb. So everyone has a somewhere. Some

507
00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:07,080
Speaker 1: are smaller than others, but everyone has one. So everyone

508
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:11,280
Speaker 1: has the same filter in private. Here's here's where I

509
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:16,280
Speaker 1: want to go, Brendan. Most likely, and I love that

510
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:20,520
Speaker 1: you're thinking through it. That's great. Most likely in this scenario,

511
00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:24,040
Speaker 1: we need to look at what we're consuming in our lives,

512
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:29,160
Speaker 1: because if we're consuming rated our movies all the time.

513
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:32,840
Speaker 1: If we're listening to other podcasts with cussing all the time,

514
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:36,080
Speaker 1: if we're listening to music with cussing all the time,

515
00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:39,880
Speaker 1: then it is second nature for us and it becomes

516
00:28:40,360 --> 00:28:43,880
Speaker 1: the default. So when we have a facade of filter

517
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:47,640
Speaker 1: around Grandma and in public, but we what happens in

518
00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:52,840
Speaker 1: private reveals what's really in there. That's also a pretty good,

519
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:58,160
Speaker 1: pretty good indication of what we're consuming. So I would

520
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 1: say begin Brendan to eradicate and pay close attention to

521
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:08,760
Speaker 1: what you're paying attention to, whatever it is in your

522
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:12,960
Speaker 1: life that you are focused on. Pay attention to what

523
00:29:13,200 --> 00:29:15,200
Speaker 1: that is that you're focused on. What do I mean

524
00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 1: by that? I mean, I mean start taking accountability throughout

525
00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:22,160
Speaker 1: the day. If you're if your way of relaxing is

526
00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:26,200
Speaker 1: watching a movie that's that's got murder and shoot them

527
00:29:26,240 --> 00:29:30,080
Speaker 1: up and sex and adultery and cussing all in the movie,

528
00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:33,040
Speaker 1: and you say that's just the way I relax That

529
00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:36,240
Speaker 1: is penetrating your soul. These are things that are that

530
00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 1: are slowly bleeding into your life, and so eradicate that,

531
00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:44,560
Speaker 1: start to pull out instead of saying, how do I

532
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:47,960
Speaker 1: control myself in private? Grade er. I say, start to

533
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:52,120
Speaker 1: control what you're consuming, and I think that that will

534
00:29:52,120 --> 00:29:56,760
Speaker 1: take care of itself. What do you have on this end?

535
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:00,560
Speaker 2: Pretty elementary and but it goes along with that. And

536
00:30:00,960 --> 00:30:04,760
Speaker 2: I want to have a nice yard. I don't know

537
00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:07,160
Speaker 2: anything about having a nice yard, like I don't know

538
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:10,640
Speaker 2: all the mechanics of it. And keep it mowed, try

539
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:12,720
Speaker 2: to keep it green. And then I found out that

540
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:15,560
Speaker 2: you know, there are weeds in certain parts, but when

541
00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:19,560
Speaker 2: I'm mow, evidently I end up spreading the seed into

542
00:30:19,560 --> 00:30:22,120
Speaker 2: other parts of the yard that didn't have weeds in

543
00:30:22,160 --> 00:30:24,480
Speaker 2: it before. And then I'm trying to battle both of them, right,

544
00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:26,880
Speaker 2: And that's kind of how I see and how it's

545
00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:29,239
Speaker 2: I feel it's been in my life with cursing. Just

546
00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:32,640
Speaker 2: like you said, if you don't eradicate it in one

547
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:36,440
Speaker 2: area what you listen to and what you consume, it's

548
00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:38,800
Speaker 2: going to spread to other parts of your life. And

549
00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:43,400
Speaker 2: if it becomes I mean, he's concerned with it when

550
00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:46,400
Speaker 2: he's when he drops a hammer. That's really cool that

551
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:49,520
Speaker 2: you're like that, because if you weren't concerned with it,

552
00:30:49,560 --> 00:30:53,040
Speaker 2: then you'll just eventually not be concerned with it when

553
00:30:53,080 --> 00:30:55,760
Speaker 2: you're with friends and then it becomes normal there and

554
00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 2: then you won't really be concerned with it when you're

555
00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:00,720
Speaker 2: with your parents or in a place where you don't

556
00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:02,920
Speaker 2: And then you say it and you realize you shouldn't

557
00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:05,320
Speaker 2: have said something in that instance or in that in

558
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:08,640
Speaker 2: that uh, in that atmosphere, and you're like, where how

559
00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:10,920
Speaker 2: did this come about? Well, go back to how you

560
00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 2: were feeling no longer feeling convicted when you said it alone,

561
00:31:14,800 --> 00:31:17,200
Speaker 2: you know, yeah, And it just continues to spread throughout

562
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:20,320
Speaker 2: your life if you let it and you don't. It's

563
00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:23,560
Speaker 2: a weed, you know, yeah, And you don't take care

564
00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:26,360
Speaker 2: of it when it's small, it starts taking root in

565
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:27,320
Speaker 2: other parts of your life.

566
00:31:27,560 --> 00:31:30,920
Speaker 1: And Brennan, I've been there. I know exactly. That's that was.

567
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:33,719
Speaker 1: That was a level of sanctification with me where I

568
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:35,840
Speaker 1: was frustrated with things that came out of my mouth

569
00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:39,120
Speaker 1: when I it was a reflex, so a knee jerk.

570
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:42,880
Speaker 2: That's a conversation, you know. I said, I didn't want

571
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:45,760
Speaker 2: to listen. I like these podcasts, but I wanted to

572
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:48,080
Speaker 2: start weeding these out because the language and them were

573
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 2: just awful. It was guy a podcast, so guys just

574
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:52,960
Speaker 2: cuss around each other. Well, guys don't have to cuss

575
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:55,400
Speaker 2: around each other like that's it doesn't have to be

576
00:31:55,440 --> 00:31:56,120
Speaker 2: part of your life.

577
00:31:56,600 --> 00:32:00,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, absolutely, And and to the end to the question,

578
00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:02,840
Speaker 1: does this mean I can't listen to City Boy Stuck?

579
00:32:03,360 --> 00:32:04,320
Speaker 1: That's part of what I'm saying.

580
00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:06,480
Speaker 2: The most important question right there's yeah.

581
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:09,760
Speaker 1: I mean literally, that's what I'm saying. You're gonna hear,

582
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:12,000
Speaker 1: you know, eventually I put that I will put out

583
00:32:12,040 --> 00:32:16,000
Speaker 1: a live record for the just the last concert that

584
00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:19,600
Speaker 1: I did, and you'll hear if there ever was a

585
00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:22,880
Speaker 1: cuss word, a D word, or an H word, all

586
00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 1: of those were turned into heck heck no on is that?

587
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:35,320
Speaker 1: Yeah that city boy stuck? Yeah, city boy stuck is

588
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:39,400
Speaker 1: heck no on the live record, And even that that

589
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:41,680
Speaker 1: was a form of sanctification for me to get there.

590
00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:44,160
Speaker 1: And then even beyond that, it's like I shouldn't even

591
00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:47,880
Speaker 1: say that, and so so yeah, it depends on what

592
00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:51,560
Speaker 1: you're consuming, what you're surrounding yourself with. And I'm sorry

593
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:54,760
Speaker 1: I was that influence. I was a bad influence on

594
00:32:54,840 --> 00:32:58,040
Speaker 1: people as Earl Devils Junior and with the music, So

595
00:32:59,520 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 1: forgive me of that. I'm I'm trying to eradicate that

596
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:03,360
Speaker 1: out of my life as well.

597
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:06,000
Speaker 2: They're close to the end of your year tour. When

598
00:33:06,040 --> 00:33:08,200
Speaker 2: I would go out with you, I would like what

599
00:33:08,240 --> 00:33:10,200
Speaker 2: you have on right now in ears. I would have

600
00:33:10,320 --> 00:33:14,840
Speaker 2: those in while I was shooting photos whatever I was doing,

601
00:33:15,080 --> 00:33:18,400
Speaker 2: and I would because when you have them thata close

602
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:21,719
Speaker 2: to your ear drum, you hear the full word, not

603
00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:24,280
Speaker 2: what you are used to singing in the song. And

604
00:33:24,360 --> 00:33:27,080
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, he's changing the words the songs. Yeah, yeah,

605
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:29,800
Speaker 2: there's a change. And he was a started notice on that.

606
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:34,960
Speaker 1: Then yeah. Next question comes from Travis says, Hey, hope

607
00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:36,480
Speaker 1: you're having I hope it's going I hope your day

608
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:38,920
Speaker 1: is going well. Sorry. I found your podcast a few

609
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 1: months ago during some long hours at work, and it

610
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:45,080
Speaker 1: made me think about God, and that makes me think

611
00:33:45,080 --> 00:33:49,360
Speaker 1: about my old roommate. I'm glad, first of all. On

612
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:52,200
Speaker 1: the side note, I'm glad that I'll make you think

613
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:56,600
Speaker 1: of God. Sorry airplane voice. Have I said that yet?

614
00:33:57,120 --> 00:34:00,840
Speaker 1: I found his listing on Facebook, but of looking for

615
00:34:00,920 --> 00:34:03,400
Speaker 1: a renter in a room I had to move for

616
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:06,800
Speaker 1: school and couldn't find anything I could afford. I moved

617
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:08,440
Speaker 1: in with him and had a great time with him

618
00:34:08,440 --> 00:34:12,080
Speaker 1: and his fiance. I proposed to my now wife in

619
00:34:12,120 --> 00:34:14,160
Speaker 1: that house and then moved out a few months later.

620
00:34:14,640 --> 00:34:16,879
Speaker 1: We would hang out from time to time. Then one

621
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:20,160
Speaker 1: Thursday in December, we were supposed to hang out. I

622
00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:23,000
Speaker 1: had a garage with a dartboard. We started a game,

623
00:34:23,480 --> 00:34:26,200
Speaker 1: a game we never got to finish. I texted him

624
00:34:26,239 --> 00:34:27,960
Speaker 1: a few times that day to make sure he was

625
00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:31,160
Speaker 1: still up to hang out. No response. A few hours later,

626
00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:33,920
Speaker 1: he texted or so I thought it was his wife.

627
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:38,560
Speaker 1: He had taken his life that day. Around one year,

628
00:34:38,719 --> 00:34:41,520
Speaker 1: around the one year mark, I sent a Facebook message

629
00:34:41,520 --> 00:34:45,080
Speaker 1: to his widow, but it never went through. My wife

630
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:47,720
Speaker 1: was able to message her just fine. I'm not sure

631
00:34:48,120 --> 00:34:51,239
Speaker 1: if this is a message from God or not. He

632
00:34:51,280 --> 00:34:54,319
Speaker 1: was a very religious person. Christmas was his favorite time

633
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:57,399
Speaker 1: of year. Now for my question, should I keep trying

634
00:34:57,480 --> 00:34:59,800
Speaker 1: to reach out to the widow of my friend or

635
00:35:00,120 --> 00:35:05,000
Speaker 1: leave it? Since since the first time the message didn't

636
00:35:05,040 --> 00:35:07,760
Speaker 1: go through, I've driven by the house a few times

637
00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:11,359
Speaker 1: and it doesn't look to be kept up. I think

638
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:15,080
Speaker 1: she moved back to her parents' house. They are all

639
00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:17,640
Speaker 1: of us are in our early twenties. Thanks in advanced

640
00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:23,840
Speaker 1: Travis okay, tough situation, Travis, let me kind of dive in.

641
00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:26,839
Speaker 1: There's this is multi layered, so let me dive in

642
00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:32,120
Speaker 1: as if we're sitting in the caboat truck. I'm gonna

643
00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:35,680
Speaker 1: start with you found my podcast a few months ago

644
00:35:36,480 --> 00:35:39,880
Speaker 1: and it made you think about God. That's interesting to me.

645
00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:46,320
Speaker 1: Let's come back to it. Secondly, you got a buddy

646
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:53,439
Speaker 1: from Facebook because of the room for rent. It wasn't

647
00:35:53,480 --> 00:35:56,439
Speaker 1: a great buddy, it was just a good acquaintance. Right.

648
00:35:57,320 --> 00:35:58,800
Speaker 2: Sounds like they did a lot of life together.

649
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:04,680
Speaker 1: They did some life together. Yeah. The message to the

650
00:36:04,719 --> 00:36:07,759
Speaker 1: widow that didn't go through, is this a message from

651
00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:10,960
Speaker 1: God or No? God's not going to communicate through a

652
00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:16,719
Speaker 1: failed Facebook message. God is sovereign over everything, including Facebook messages.

653
00:36:17,120 --> 00:36:18,799
Speaker 1: So if God didn't want the message to go through,

654
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:21,560
Speaker 1: he will do it or not. That's not a question.

655
00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:23,560
Speaker 1: The question is was God trying to send you a

656
00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:26,600
Speaker 1: cryptic message through the mess through the Facebook message not

657
00:36:26,640 --> 00:36:29,399
Speaker 1: going through that? No, the Bible doesn't speak in terms

658
00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:32,680
Speaker 1: of God knowing us in that way or speaking to

659
00:36:32,760 --> 00:36:35,600
Speaker 1: us that way. He speaks to us in one way,

660
00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:38,840
Speaker 1: and that is through the Son, the Word of God,

661
00:36:39,040 --> 00:36:43,319
Speaker 1: the Son made flesh, Jesus through the Bible. We have

662
00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:48,160
Speaker 1: sixty six books God Inspired, written by over forty different

663
00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:51,840
Speaker 1: authors over the course of fifteen hundred years, revealing the

664
00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:54,120
Speaker 1: truth of who God is and how He has revealed

665
00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:58,000
Speaker 1: himself to us to reconcile us to himself, to bring

666
00:36:58,120 --> 00:37:02,319
Speaker 1: us to himself through his on Jesus. That's the way

667
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:05,800
Speaker 1: he communicates to you, not through a failed Facebook message.

668
00:37:05,840 --> 00:37:08,320
Speaker 1: That's a cryptic. Should I know if this is God

669
00:37:08,480 --> 00:37:13,120
Speaker 1: trying to say something like we're in the movie American Treasure.

670
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:21,880
Speaker 1: What's that movie treasure? The National Treasure? It's not National Treasure.

671
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:22,920
Speaker 2: Sorry, I wasn't help there.

672
00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:27,080
Speaker 1: Okay, So we've established that, and then let's look into

673
00:37:28,560 --> 00:37:31,520
Speaker 1: he was a very religious person. Christmas was his famous

674
00:37:31,840 --> 00:37:37,000
Speaker 1: favorite time of year. That's not really part of this topic.

675
00:37:37,440 --> 00:37:40,000
Speaker 1: I'll lay off that. Should you keep reaching out to

676
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:43,280
Speaker 1: the widow or be very careful because she's a widow,

677
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:47,239
Speaker 1: she's single, and you're married, so you have to be

678
00:37:47,280 --> 00:37:50,280
Speaker 1: careful with that dynamic. I love that she is reaching

679
00:37:50,320 --> 00:37:53,239
Speaker 1: your wife is reaching out. It's a great thing, but

680
00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:55,839
Speaker 1: you don't want to send them a signal that you

681
00:37:55,880 --> 00:38:00,719
Speaker 1: are reaching out privately to a widow. That is vulnerable

682
00:38:01,320 --> 00:38:03,879
Speaker 1: to a very nice man that just wants to help.

683
00:38:04,320 --> 00:38:08,359
Speaker 1: That's a bad situation. Let's stay clear of that. You've

684
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:09,920
Speaker 1: been up by the house, it looks like it needs

685
00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:12,319
Speaker 1: to be kept up. Work through your wife in that.

686
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:13,000
Speaker 2: It's great.

687
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:16,360
Speaker 1: It's a biblical command, of course to take care of

688
00:38:16,440 --> 00:38:19,640
Speaker 1: widows and orphans. But make sure you're doing this in

689
00:38:19,680 --> 00:38:23,719
Speaker 1: a responsible way. I e. Through your wife and have

690
00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:26,200
Speaker 1: her reach out and say, hey, I saw that the

691
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:29,719
Speaker 1: house has some weeds. Do you mind if I send

692
00:38:29,719 --> 00:38:31,319
Speaker 1: my husband over there. He's got a weed eater and

693
00:38:31,800 --> 00:38:34,560
Speaker 1: he'd be happy to take care of it. And that way,

694
00:38:34,600 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 1: you're protecting your own marriage through a potential temptation as

695
00:38:39,560 --> 00:38:41,120
Speaker 1: simple as that. You don't have to go any further

696
00:38:41,160 --> 00:38:45,120
Speaker 1: than that. And she's in her early twenties, most likely

697
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:48,120
Speaker 1: she will be remarried. I don't say that with trying

698
00:38:48,160 --> 00:38:52,960
Speaker 1: to be without sensitivity to the situation, but this typically

699
00:38:53,080 --> 00:38:55,279
Speaker 1: typically what's going to happen is she'll re marry. As

700
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:59,920
Speaker 1: difficult as this situation is, and she's going to be okay,

701
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:05,880
Speaker 1: very very I mean unbelievably difficult situations. So I'm not

702
00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:10,480
Speaker 1: trying to be insensitive, but this is different. If she's

703
00:39:11,320 --> 00:39:14,040
Speaker 1: she's seventy years old and she's a widow and she

704
00:39:14,120 --> 00:39:16,520
Speaker 1: doesn't have a family, and she doesn't have That's when

705
00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:18,640
Speaker 1: you go over and you go, ma'am, I'd like to

706
00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:20,640
Speaker 1: like to start doing your grass, to take care of

707
00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:23,120
Speaker 1: your grass, if that's okay, And maybe I can come

708
00:39:23,120 --> 00:39:25,400
Speaker 1: and clean some of this stuff off your front porch.

709
00:39:26,440 --> 00:39:29,719
Speaker 1: That's a different situation then she's early twenties, yes, and

710
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:33,960
Speaker 1: you're going, is there anything I can help you with? Right? Okay? Yeah,

711
00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:37,880
Speaker 1: I agreed. I think the most important part of this

712
00:39:38,040 --> 00:39:42,320
Speaker 1: entire email is the first sentence. I found her podcast

713
00:39:42,360 --> 00:39:45,960
Speaker 1: a few months ago, and it made me think about God.

714
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:50,200
Speaker 1: I think, if anything, Travis, I want to use this

715
00:39:50,239 --> 00:39:56,000
Speaker 1: as an opportunity, not for the grieving widow, not for

716
00:39:56,120 --> 00:40:00,799
Speaker 1: the guilt that you may have. There's always a weird

717
00:40:00,800 --> 00:40:04,400
Speaker 1: guilt around suicide. In fact, yesterday I was speaking at

718
00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:07,160
Speaker 1: a church and a man came up to me afterward

719
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:11,879
Speaker 1: and he said that his dad just committed suicide two

720
00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:17,319
Speaker 1: months ago. And he said, I'm having trouble grieving and

721
00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:22,640
Speaker 1: I don't know why, and I'm no grief book seems

722
00:40:22,680 --> 00:40:25,760
Speaker 1: to matter to me, No advice anyone gives me seems

723
00:40:25,760 --> 00:40:28,400
Speaker 1: to matter to me, And I said, I said, that's

724
00:40:28,440 --> 00:40:32,320
Speaker 1: because suicide it carries a different weight to it, because

725
00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:35,640
Speaker 1: it carries a sinister guilt into all the people that

726
00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:39,960
Speaker 1: knew that person, thinking could I have done more? It's

727
00:40:40,000 --> 00:40:42,840
Speaker 1: not like a cancer, it's not like a heart attack,

728
00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:45,840
Speaker 1: it's not like a car accident. This is something that

729
00:40:46,000 --> 00:40:51,359
Speaker 1: everyone around the suicide starts questioning themselves. Oh, you think

730
00:40:51,400 --> 00:40:53,560
Speaker 1: about the last conversation you had, You think about the

731
00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:55,880
Speaker 1: last time you're with him? Should think about it? Should

732
00:40:55,920 --> 00:40:58,399
Speaker 1: I see have seen it? Should I have reported it?

733
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:01,400
Speaker 1: Should I have done more? Everyone thinks that that's different

734
00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:06,320
Speaker 1: than cancer. So, Travis, this is a little bit of

735
00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:09,879
Speaker 1: what's going on with you. You're thinking, Man, that dart game

736
00:41:11,920 --> 00:41:14,480
Speaker 1: I texted him no response? Should I have texted him

737
00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:17,680
Speaker 1: an hour earlier? Should I have scheduled that dark game

738
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:21,080
Speaker 1: the day before? If I had, would this have been different?

739
00:41:21,760 --> 00:41:25,680
Speaker 1: So recognize that this is part of your struggle and

740
00:41:26,719 --> 00:41:27,520
Speaker 1: go ahead, Well.

741
00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:30,360
Speaker 2: No, you've already touched on it. But man, that you

742
00:41:30,520 --> 00:41:34,279
Speaker 2: saying that's part of your struggle to then latch onto

743
00:41:34,320 --> 00:41:37,240
Speaker 2: someone of the opposite sex, to go, oh, we're struggling

744
00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 2: with the same thing. Is very, very, very dangerous. So

745
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:43,040
Speaker 2: if you think that there was a man, and I

746
00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:44,480
Speaker 2: know there's not, but if you think there was a

747
00:41:44,480 --> 00:41:48,040
Speaker 2: message from God and not getting that that message through

748
00:41:48,080 --> 00:41:50,640
Speaker 2: to her on Facebook, I would just consider it protection

749
00:41:50,840 --> 00:41:51,279
Speaker 2: and move on.

750
00:41:52,920 --> 00:41:53,440
Speaker 1: That's great.

751
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:57,360
Speaker 2: Just you were protected. You made a rash decision and

752
00:41:57,400 --> 00:42:00,640
Speaker 2: shot her a private message that was protection that it

753
00:42:00,680 --> 00:42:01,360
Speaker 2: didn't go through.

754
00:42:01,840 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 1: I think that's great. I think it's great. It's not

755
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:08,360
Speaker 1: there's a difference between God protecting you and God sending

756
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:11,440
Speaker 1: you a crypt a cryptic message through the message not

757
00:42:11,480 --> 00:42:15,080
Speaker 1: going through like a man saying let it go. And

758
00:42:15,120 --> 00:42:18,759
Speaker 1: then let's start thinking about why my podcast makes you

759
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:23,400
Speaker 1: think about God. And I'm very grateful that the Lord

760
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:27,600
Speaker 1: could possibly use this podcast for someone to so that

761
00:42:27,719 --> 00:42:31,719
Speaker 1: he might draw someone to himself. If I'm that if

762
00:42:31,719 --> 00:42:34,400
Speaker 1: this podcast the Lord uses this podcast as a conduit

763
00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:39,640
Speaker 1: for that man, that's amazing and so encouraging. But I

764
00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 1: want to follow up on that and say, Travis, I

765
00:42:44,960 --> 00:42:50,400
Speaker 1: would I would think about how God does reveal himself

766
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:53,239
Speaker 1: because if you're if you're open to the consideration that

767
00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:57,360
Speaker 1: God might message you, send a cryptic message through Facebook

768
00:42:57,360 --> 00:43:02,880
Speaker 1: to you, I would consider what Christians know to be

769
00:43:02,960 --> 00:43:06,319
Speaker 1: true in the way that God has revealed himself, and

770
00:43:06,320 --> 00:43:09,080
Speaker 1: that is through the Bible. And we spoke a little

771
00:43:09,080 --> 00:43:11,560
Speaker 1: bit about that. But then I would I would consider

772
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:15,120
Speaker 1: why God has revealed himself in the Bible, and what

773
00:43:15,160 --> 00:43:17,960
Speaker 1: the message of that Bible is. And truly the message

774
00:43:17,960 --> 00:43:21,920
Speaker 1: of that Bible is that you cannot be good enough

775
00:43:21,960 --> 00:43:26,080
Speaker 1: for Him. That you could, you could not make up

776
00:43:26,160 --> 00:43:31,399
Speaker 1: for the sin that has separated you from God, which

777
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:35,480
Speaker 1: is a rebellion of God, who created the world and

778
00:43:35,520 --> 00:43:38,279
Speaker 1: it was good, and he created man in his own

779
00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:42,160
Speaker 1: image and it was good. And then man rebelled against

780
00:43:42,239 --> 00:43:47,080
Speaker 1: him in the garden, instantly wanting to be God himself

781
00:43:47,120 --> 00:43:51,040
Speaker 1: in a way, and through that we have inherited that sin,

782
00:43:51,080 --> 00:43:55,040
Speaker 1: and all of us have followed suit with our original

783
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:59,080
Speaker 1: father Adam. And you could testify this to yourself. I can't.

784
00:43:59,120 --> 00:44:02,040
Speaker 1: You can't at and Travis, you can to. Thinking back

785
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:05,759
Speaker 1: to have you rebelled against Gott? Have you used yourself

786
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:10,319
Speaker 1: in a self centered, controlling way where you become your

787
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:13,399
Speaker 1: own God, in charge of your own salvation, in charge

788
00:44:13,440 --> 00:44:16,600
Speaker 1: of your own destiny. The answer is always to that, yes,

789
00:44:17,120 --> 00:44:20,000
Speaker 1: we all have. And so you think, well, what do

790
00:44:20,040 --> 00:44:22,080
Speaker 1: I do to make up for this? How do I

791
00:44:22,120 --> 00:44:26,040
Speaker 1: fix this problem? And the truth is that that would

792
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:30,920
Speaker 1: be like a murderer sitting in the courtroom saying, Judge,

793
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:35,840
Speaker 1: I'm really sorry I murdered. I committed a huge crime,

794
00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:39,520
Speaker 1: and I want to tell you I've learned my lesson

795
00:44:40,000 --> 00:44:41,759
Speaker 1: and I want to do better. How could I do it?

796
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:46,920
Speaker 1: And the judge says, I don't really care what you

797
00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:50,040
Speaker 1: say about who you are now and that you've changed.

798
00:44:51,200 --> 00:44:53,640
Speaker 1: In order for me to be just, in order for

799
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:55,839
Speaker 1: me to be a good judge, I have to carry

800
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:59,480
Speaker 1: out my punishment. And so that's a major problem with humans,

801
00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:02,479
Speaker 1: and that steff to God. But God knowing this, knowing

802
00:45:02,480 --> 00:45:05,160
Speaker 1: that we couldn't make our way to him. The story

803
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:08,960
Speaker 1: of the Bible literally is that God came to us.

804
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:14,720
Speaker 1: He condescended himself, the creator of the universe, to become man,

805
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 1: to come into his own universe that he created, to

806
00:45:19,160 --> 00:45:24,120
Speaker 1: live the perfect life, to be the example of what

807
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:28,760
Speaker 1: atom should have been, the original atom that failed. God

808
00:45:29,040 --> 00:45:32,160
Speaker 1: comes in the form of man as Jesus to be

809
00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:35,440
Speaker 1: the second atom, to be the perfect one, who then

810
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:38,360
Speaker 1: went to the cross and died as a sacrifice, the

811
00:45:38,440 --> 00:45:41,239
Speaker 1: ultimate sacrifice of all that punishment I said that the

812
00:45:41,320 --> 00:45:46,040
Speaker 1: judge gives to the murder. Jesus takes that punishment on himself.

813
00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:49,279
Speaker 1: He takes the sin of the world, all of it,

814
00:45:49,760 --> 00:45:52,640
Speaker 1: onto himself from the wrath of God, the punishment that

815
00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:55,640
Speaker 1: the just judge has to still punish. So now back

816
00:45:55,680 --> 00:45:59,040
Speaker 1: to the scenario of the murder, he goes, Judge, what

817
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:02,880
Speaker 1: can I do? Judge gets a notice and he goes, Actually,

818
00:46:02,880 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 1: a man has stepped in your place and taking your

819
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:08,480
Speaker 1: punishment on himself. So now I'm just to set you free.

820
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:11,279
Speaker 1: And now that you're free, you live a life of

821
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:14,839
Speaker 1: gratitude in obedience to the one that sets you free.

822
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:17,759
Speaker 1: That's what the Bible says Jesus did for us. And

823
00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:22,080
Speaker 1: so I want you to explore this idea that the

824
00:46:22,080 --> 00:46:25,240
Speaker 1: Bible says. And if God communicates with us in this way,

825
00:46:25,480 --> 00:46:27,080
Speaker 1: and there is only one way that he made for

826
00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:29,759
Speaker 1: us to be able to know him and to know

827
00:46:29,800 --> 00:46:32,000
Speaker 1: what he wants, to know what he loves, to know

828
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:34,960
Speaker 1: what he hates. If there is only one way the Bible,

829
00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:38,600
Speaker 1: then then then there must be a need for you

830
00:46:38,680 --> 00:46:41,400
Speaker 1: to read it like an instruction manual for your own life.

831
00:46:41,680 --> 00:46:44,000
Speaker 1: And then there must be a community called the church

832
00:46:44,320 --> 00:46:48,239
Speaker 1: that could surround you and help carry you through situations

833
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:52,360
Speaker 1: like this, this Facebook thing, Travis. That's my encouragement to you.

834
00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:59,040
Speaker 1: You have anything to add to that encouragement before. I

835
00:46:59,120 --> 00:47:02,040
Speaker 1: appreciate you guys, all of y'all for emailing and if

836
00:47:02,080 --> 00:47:03,879
Speaker 1: you want to yeah, if you want to keep it coming,

837
00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 1: shoot a message to podcast at grangersmith dot com and

838
00:47:07,160 --> 00:47:10,560
Speaker 1: like always, we'll see you next Monday. Thanks for joining

839
00:47:10,600 --> 00:47:13,960
Speaker 1: me on the Grangersmith podcast. I appreciate all of you guys.

840
00:47:13,960 --> 00:47:16,920
Speaker 1: You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes.

841
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:20,279
Speaker 1: If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel, hit that

842
00:47:20,320 --> 00:47:23,719
Speaker 1: little like button and notification spell so that you never

843
00:47:23,840 --> 00:47:27,240
Speaker 1: miss anytime I upload a video. Yigi