Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of the
Speaker 1: success trend Finale. I am Jack, that is Miles. Thanks
Speaker 1: for having these are some things that are trending. So
Speaker 1: the Succession finale is this weekend. Do you have predictions?
Speaker 2: Do you have hopes?
Speaker 3: No? I don't. I'm not.
Speaker 4: I don't watch Succession to be like this is what's
Speaker 4: gonna happen.
Speaker 3: I'm just more like, what oh fuck?
Speaker 2: Oh oh man, I've got I know a lot of.
Speaker 4: People have some I've read so I've seen so many
Speaker 4: headlines are like a theory as to why Mattson's go
Speaker 4: Joe deal. I'm like, what the hell fuck?
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not sort of, It's not like a mystery
Speaker 1: box show where you well, how are they going to
Speaker 1: explain the polar Bears from season two?
Speaker 2: It's not the leftover.
Speaker 3: It's like Damon Lindeloff's succession or something like that. But yeah,
Speaker 3: I don't know. I hope.
Speaker 4: I guess at the very least because of the last episode,
Speaker 4: where you know, the real world began to intersect with
Speaker 4: the roy family. I hope that maybe it's like I
Speaker 4: don't know, becomes like a morality tale and they're they
Speaker 4: lose it all something fucked up happens, because like this
Speaker 4: is what happens when you fuck with normal people all
Speaker 4: the time in pursuit of your media empire.
Speaker 3: I don't know, there's something like that. I'd be like, yo,
Speaker 3: that's wild. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I feel like a lot of the takes like people
Speaker 1: were like anybody who is sad that bad things are
Speaker 1: happening to these people is like a capitalist piece of shit.
Speaker 1: Like I don't By the way, there are no takes
Speaker 1: that are that strong, but like, you know, like I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't I feel like I don't have
Speaker 1: to hate, Like I can feel sorry for these characters
Speaker 1: at the same time as like recognizing that they are
Speaker 1: part of a system that is completely corrupt and like
Speaker 1: that this is so.
Speaker 4: By that logic, you'd be like the Sopranos is disgusting,
Speaker 4: they're murderers.
Speaker 2: Yeah exactly.
Speaker 1: I'm just like, no, that's what drama is like, shows
Speaker 1: us bad people doing bad things, but like you get
Speaker 1: to see their humanity and like fall for them a
Speaker 1: little bit.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: That's the part that fucks with you is when you
Speaker 4: begin to side with the capitalist ship bag who's a
Speaker 4: fascist wannabe who's trying to bring about the demise of
Speaker 4: American democracy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you.
Speaker 4: Can also feel bad that he's a shook one who
Speaker 4: has no ability to deal with his father's law.
Speaker 1: What a what a penultimate episode for Roman?
Speaker 3: Yeah, but uh.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, I've got a lot of I've got
Speaker 1: a lot of wagers on the final episode. I think
Speaker 1: it's going to be coming through. Got some prop that
Speaker 1: Miles who won this one, I'm gonna say covers that
Speaker 1: winners right hand. Yeah, because I feel like this is
Speaker 1: as big of a final episode as we've seen since
Speaker 1: Game of Thrones probably right. Oh yeah, I hated it,
Speaker 1: which was Yeah, that was a disaster. I don't know,
Speaker 1: Breaking Bad was one that felt didn't it was huge
Speaker 1: and people felt like it stuck the landing.
Speaker 2: I wasn't as big a fan.
Speaker 4: I wasn't like, oh that's I don't know how many
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh, that was the best one, even like Sopranos,
Speaker 4: Like I was like, I think I think it's good
Speaker 4: in that it elegantly wrapped up the show and left
Speaker 4: people thinking. And you can talk a lot about it,
Speaker 4: but I don't know, like I'm one of those people
Speaker 4: who like won't watch, Like I've never seen the Seinfeld finale.
Speaker 3: Because I just refused to watch it because.
Speaker 4: I heard it was bad and be I don't want
Speaker 4: to like be like and that's the end of it,
Speaker 4: because it just feels like a show that can exist.
Speaker 1: Those are your friends and you don't want them to
Speaker 1: go away because you will also watch it exactly because methods.
Speaker 4: Right, because Kramer is my favorite guy ever on and
Speaker 4: off camera.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think Sopranos and Seinfeld are like one side
Speaker 1: of it where it's like kind of a fuck you
Speaker 1: final episode where it's like, yeah, we're actually giving you
Speaker 1: not what you want, but they do it artfully. I
Speaker 1: think Sopranos is one of the best to ever do it,
Speaker 1: if not the US six feet Under kind of just
Speaker 1: gave you all like they were just like, all right,
Speaker 1: we're gonna show you how everyone dies, right, Just it
Speaker 1: was like fan service in the best way possible. I
Speaker 1: feel like if I had to guess which direction Succession
Speaker 1: would go, it would probably be more in the Sopranos
Speaker 1: Seinfeld direction.
Speaker 4: I think maybe I don't know. Again, in my mind,
Speaker 4: i'd be like, yo, I hope they get.
Speaker 2: Got just taken out.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would be like, yo, yes, if it's by.
Speaker 2: And they just like, oh, that this ship was going
Speaker 2: to happen.
Speaker 3: That was Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean the last time we saw Jeremy Strong's character,
Speaker 1: he was swimming in the ocean. I'm just saying it's
Speaker 1: not true. Out of the realm of this whole ship.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, it's wild.
Speaker 2: And then whole ship wait what the whole entire his
Speaker 2: whole ship.
Speaker 4: Bro just wow, gets his ass man, he's floating with
Speaker 4: his head back.
Speaker 3: He doesn't see this ship coming. Yeah, this whole shit.
Speaker 1: Gets too busy thinking about Gojo. There's also news being
Speaker 1: made by Las Culturistas Big Money Players Network, super produced
Speaker 1: by our same super producer on AJS and and superducer
Speaker 1: Becca Ramas. So Bowen was talking about how when he
Speaker 1: was on the Aquafina show, Yeah, that they were shooting
Speaker 1: in the same studio in Queen's I think as Succession
Speaker 1: and Jeremy Strong came into their set and asks yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: and asked where the bathroom was and was told and
Speaker 1: then uh so, I'll just read directly from Bowen's quote,
Speaker 1: So Jeremy leaves ten minutes past and a production assistant
Speaker 1: from Succession comes into the office and goes, hi, was
Speaker 1: Jeremy just in here and they were like, yeah, he was.
Speaker 2: He went to the bathroom. And then this PA.
Speaker 1: Goes, did he ask where it was? Did he come
Speaker 1: here to ask you where the bathroom was? And they
Speaker 1: were like yeah, why and the PA says, ah, he
Speaker 1: has a scene today where he has to ask someone
Speaker 1: where the bathroom is. And then Bowen Yang was saying,
Speaker 1: I think that is method to such a ridiculous degree
Speaker 1: that he must be in on the joke.
Speaker 2: Is his theory right.
Speaker 4: Like to the point if there's like an exasperated pa
Speaker 4: like he was like he's been doing, it's because it
Speaker 4: sounds like the same thing of like, was my dad
Speaker 4: doing this stupid bit where he's asking where the bathroom is?
Speaker 3: Right because he knows where it is? Oh my god.
Speaker 4: And then it's fun for that person because when they
Speaker 4: go finally find Jeremy go you had to ask where
Speaker 4: the bathrooms like I didn't know where it was.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so let's I don't know.
Speaker 1: I can't I can't do it, but I respect the
Speaker 1: hell out of anybody who can do a Kendle Roy impression.
Speaker 1: Somebody just did one on Twitter and I love it
Speaker 1: so much where there's so specific, so annoying.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because it's also like a it's like a total
Speaker 4: lack of soul and charisma too, but with just a
Speaker 4: little bit.
Speaker 3: It's a really hard needle to thread.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just devoured, no soul, no any no confidence, but
Speaker 1: like somehow propped up by circumstance, but then has like
Speaker 1: also just has this entire bible of like tech bro
Speaker 1: speak right right.
Speaker 2: Right, He's just drawing on it all times. It's so wild.
Speaker 1: Anyways, enjoy your succession finale succession watchers. We're gonna take
Speaker 1: a break and we'll come back and talk about news
Speaker 1: that doesn't have to do with my friends from Wastar Roco.
Speaker 3: But maybe sharks.
Speaker 1: Maybe sharks, not baby sharks. Parents don't worry, and we're back.
Speaker 1: And I know I told you it wasn't gonna be
Speaker 1: baby sharks. But when I talked you think the sea,
Speaker 1: you think lighthouses and seamless transition.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: Ten lighthouses that for generations have stood along American shorelines
Speaker 1: protecting mariners from peril, are being sold at auction by
Speaker 1: the federal government.
Speaker 3: Ah, because we don't need them no more. Huh.
Speaker 2: I guess we don't need them no more.
Speaker 1: I feel like right, Yeah, that's what they're saying. We
Speaker 1: don't need them no more because gps.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we don't need them no more.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we don't need the but the lights where the
Speaker 4: cliffs are and ship where're gonna hit You're gonna run
Speaker 4: run aground.
Speaker 3: I don't know. I mean, isn't there something romantic about
Speaker 3: a lighthouse? Oh?
Speaker 2: Love it? I love it so much.
Speaker 3: I've said that as someone who's never even been in
Speaker 3: a fucking.
Speaker 1: Lighthouse, never even on miles. Aren't the idea of them?
Speaker 1: It's a lighting so dramatic.
Speaker 4: I think the first lighthouse ever saw it was like
Speaker 4: on a bag of cape Cod chips or something.
Speaker 1: And that's all you need to see, you get it.
Speaker 1: That's what's good about lighthouses. They are not subtle. They
Speaker 1: are just standing there being dramatic narcissists.
Speaker 2: Giant sea dicks. Look at my land dick.
Speaker 1: Sea dominating the land ee seafaring folk.
Speaker 4: So you can how much do we know? How much
Speaker 4: like a lighthouse is going for? Is it even worth it?
Speaker 4: Or is it just like for someone who's so obsessed
Speaker 4: with lighthouses, like that's what it's going to appeal to.
Speaker 1: About one and fifty lighthouses have been transferred, eighty or
Speaker 1: so given away, and another seventy auctioned, raising more than
Speaker 1: ten million dollars. So that's not that much.
Speaker 2: I guess given away.
Speaker 1: Okay, so only seventy years old and all of that
Speaker 1: is totaling up to ten million dollars. I'm no math wizard,
Speaker 1: but I think that's less than a million dollars each.
Speaker 1: So they seem like you can get them pretty cheap, since, yeah,
Speaker 1: get them, we're given away for free. I did have
Speaker 1: an opportunity my to talk to some people who have
Speaker 1: been to lighthouses in person, and they say they're boring.
Speaker 1: The plotting is predictable, the light just goes around in
Speaker 1: a circle the whole time.
Speaker 2: And they're smaller than you expect them to be.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, like yeah, exactly, predictable and smart.
Speaker 1: Without the magnetic charisma that from that, they just stand
Speaker 1: there and don't do shit.
Speaker 2: Anyways.
Speaker 1: Shout out to the lighthouse keepers out there. You know,
Speaker 1: some Trump workers at mar A Lago moved boxes of
Speaker 1: papers the day before the FBI visit, according to a report.
Speaker 2: But I feel like I read six months ago, right.
Speaker 3: Everything sounds like the same thing over and over again.
Speaker 4: It's like, yeah, I think that went from like being
Speaker 4: a rumor to now, isn't that person like cooperating?
Speaker 3: Yeah, isn't that why this has happened?
Speaker 1: So yeah, okay, so maybe we'll get them this time, folks.
Speaker 3: Yeah, who knows, Maybe this is it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, like on John Oliver, you hit the button, You're like,
Speaker 4: we've got him, bring out the band yet?
Speaker 3: Nah? Yep, maybe not.
Speaker 1: This turns out not turns out he will be our
Speaker 1: next president, even if he's in jail.
Speaker 4: Yeah, somehow, or Ron de Santis can or H'm sorry,
Speaker 4: Rob DeSantis can pardon him.
Speaker 3: Yeah, as he said, that's.
Speaker 4: Been his new things, like you know, and i'd i'd
Speaker 4: pardon the president. You're like, oh my god, dude, you
Speaker 4: you're already losing. Yeah, by saying shit like this.
Speaker 3: He is.
Speaker 1: Just a professional kiss ass. Like that's all he does
Speaker 1: is kiss people's ass and like it. Now he's moved
Speaker 1: on to Elon Musk from Trump. But like his first
Speaker 1: deal with Trump, where like when he first became a
Speaker 1: politician was just being a Trump guy, like more than
Speaker 1: anybody else, dressed his baby up in like Maga outfits
Speaker 1: in the campaign ads, and he's like and.
Speaker 3: Donald Trump saved our country, babe. That's my favorite part, Like.
Speaker 1: Come on, yeah, when we get on to Rob, yeah,
Speaker 1: which I'm not above taking a nickname the Trump gives
Speaker 1: someone and using it if I don't like that person.
Speaker 1: So Rob DeSantis has signed a bill that would basically
Speaker 1: protect Elon Musk from lawsuits if his rockets blow up
Speaker 1: and kill workers.
Speaker 3: Yep, that easy, folks. That's all it takes was to
Speaker 3: completely just.
Speaker 4: Jet fuck your campaign announcement on Twitter. Uh, and then
Speaker 4: you can get a bill that I don't know, this
Speaker 4: is really wild. It's it's more than that, it says.
Speaker 4: The bill expands the definition of spaceflight entity to include
Speaker 4: any entity authorized to conduct spaceflight activities beyond one solely
Speaker 4: associated with the United States Federal Aviation Administration, opening up
Speaker 4: which entities in the broader industry will qualify for the
Speaker 4: expanded immunity.
Speaker 3: And the bill also.
Speaker 4: Cuts out language ascribing liability to spaceflight entities for damage
Speaker 4: caused from quote inherent risks. Instead, the bill brought into
Speaker 4: scope of liability immunity to include all space flight activities
Speaker 4: to go ahead, get reckless.
Speaker 3: Let this shit fucking do.
Speaker 4: I don't know that, you know, we see stuff like
Speaker 4: this all the time, but it feels very convenient for
Speaker 4: Elon Musk and I got I hope fucking nothing happens
Speaker 4: with a bill like this where like it's necessary, but
Speaker 4: holy shit, that's not that's not the kind of that's
Speaker 4: like a regulation you want to see.
Speaker 1: That was the question that popped in my mind the
Speaker 1: last time he had a rocket launch and the whole
Speaker 1: shit blew up and there were giant chunks of rocket
Speaker 1: that were like falling on like what. One just like
Speaker 1: completely obliterated a mini van that was like parked nearby,
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, they're going to be killing people,
Speaker 1: Like they're lucky this didn't kill anybody, even though it
Speaker 1: was an unmanned launch. They're lucky that the giant chunks
Speaker 1: of shrapnel falling out of the sky didn't kill anyone.
Speaker 1: So like, how is that going to be continue to
Speaker 1: be profitable?
Speaker 4: And I think all that did was basically give Elin
Speaker 4: the imaginations like how do I get Ron DeSantis to
Speaker 4: make it legal for chunks of rocket to hit people?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: Also, people from his campaign, or at least like his supporters,
Speaker 1: seemed to be admitting that the launch was an l
Speaker 1: No Radio host Eric ericson email supporters of Desanta's about
Speaker 1: the mishap and said it was bold.
Speaker 2: It turned out to be a mistake.
Speaker 3: Oh but worry not.
Speaker 2: So so we'll see.
Speaker 1: John Wick five is in early development for the Gunfu Crew. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I've only seen the first one and probably alight.
Speaker 1: I've heard the third one is really good.
Speaker 2: I watched the fourth one. It had some cool shit,
Speaker 2: but I get.
Speaker 4: The appeal of just watching people like wile out like
Speaker 4: in an ultra violent way. I just I think it's
Speaker 4: one of those things where like when there's five of
Speaker 4: a movie, I start going, nah, nah, you're going too
Speaker 4: fast for me, and I'm not going to hitch up.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I get it. You were you were salty that
Speaker 3: someone sucked up your dog. I always been with you
Speaker 3: on that. And then there was like, now there's going
Speaker 3: to be a fifth one.
Speaker 1: Mm hm, this is right, which is especially signirising to
Speaker 1: people who saw John Wick.
Speaker 2: For I will just say that, oh really yeah, not.
Speaker 3: Just that's enough.
Speaker 1: Yeah interesting yeah uh. And finally let's wrap it all
Speaker 1: back around. Yep, they're saying the Great White shark population
Speaker 1: is booming. Great news, because it was that you were
Speaker 1: in danger. They were being hunted after an irresponsible movie
Speaker 1: that we never advocate for on this show called Jaws
Speaker 1: came out and suddenly everyone was like, they're killing machines.
Speaker 1: We've got to protect our beaches, and you know, it
Speaker 1: was very bad. The writer of the novel Jaws like
Speaker 1: ended up spending the last decades of his life like
Speaker 1: lobbying and working on behalf of to keep ye keep
Speaker 1: sharks from being killed. It seems like, you know, they
Speaker 1: have been able to get their population levels back up
Speaker 1: to normal or like something approaching normal, not like the
Speaker 1: horrifying low levels they were at before. And the mainstream
Speaker 1: media also give you two guesses as to how they're
Speaker 1: approaching this story.
Speaker 3: They're just like me. They're saying, wat's out.
Speaker 1: They're gonna bite your whole shit, bite your whole shit, America.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I already know, because I've already seen one, Like
Speaker 4: I've already seen an article that's like, you're not gonna
Speaker 4: get your whole shit bit by a shark.
Speaker 3: Relax. The chances are very low of you getting your
Speaker 3: whole shit bit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think this is This is also good news
Speaker 1: for mainstream media publications because they can just recycle the
Speaker 1: content that everyone forgets from the summer of two thousand
Speaker 1: and one, because the Time magazine issue that was on
Speaker 1: the new stand when nine to eleven happened was a
Speaker 1: Summer of the Shark picture of a great white shark
Speaker 1: coming at you on the on the cover. So maybe
Speaker 1: they'll maybe they'll just be able to kind of recycle
Speaker 1: some of that.
Speaker 3: It's wild though, how like there was a shark question mark.
Speaker 2: That's what they'll put out.
Speaker 3: There's like one story of this, uh like Connecticut woman
Speaker 3: who had her who got her her not her whole ship,
Speaker 3: but her lower ship bit by a shark, And it's
Speaker 3: like every news site just has to get on it
Speaker 3: because it says bites off leg.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I am regrettably going to be reading
Speaker 1: that article. But uh and you're so jealous jealous ah
Speaker 1: lucky ah bite my whole ship.
Speaker 2: I want to get my whole ship bit.
Speaker 1: Anyways. Uh, those are some of the things that are
Speaker 1: trending on this Friday, May Yeah, sick. We are off
Speaker 1: on Monday for a Memorial Day. We are back on
Speaker 1: Tuesday with a whole last episode.
Speaker 3: Of Remembering All the Orcas.
Speaker 1: Remembering All the Fine orch a reminder that we are
Speaker 1: changing our publication schedule, not next week but the following week,
Speaker 1: where we will have one Friday episode, one Monday episode.
Speaker 1: We'll be doing new things with format. We will be
Speaker 1: you know, taking submissions, talking with listeners, all a bunch
Speaker 1: of fun ship. So yeah, all right back Tuesday, whole
Speaker 1: last episode until then, be kind to each other, be
Speaker 1: kind to yourself, get the vaccine, don't do nothing about
Speaker 1: white supremacy, and we will talk to y'all on Tuesday.
Speaker 3: Bye bye