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Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of the

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Speaker 1: success trend Finale. I am Jack, that is Miles. Thanks

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Speaker 1: for having these are some things that are trending. So

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Speaker 1: the Succession finale is this weekend. Do you have predictions?

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Speaker 2: Do you have hopes?

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Speaker 3: No? I don't. I'm not.

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Speaker 4: I don't watch Succession to be like this is what's

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Speaker 4: gonna happen.

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Speaker 3: I'm just more like, what oh fuck?

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Speaker 2: Oh oh man, I've got I know a lot of.

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Speaker 4: People have some I've read so I've seen so many

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Speaker 4: headlines are like a theory as to why Mattson's go

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Speaker 4: Joe deal. I'm like, what the hell fuck?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not sort of, It's not like a mystery

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Speaker 1: box show where you well, how are they going to

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Speaker 1: explain the polar Bears from season two?

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Speaker 2: It's not the leftover.

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Speaker 3: It's like Damon Lindeloff's succession or something like that. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I hope.

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Speaker 4: I guess at the very least because of the last episode,

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Speaker 4: where you know, the real world began to intersect with

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Speaker 4: the roy family. I hope that maybe it's like I

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Speaker 4: don't know, becomes like a morality tale and they're they

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Speaker 4: lose it all something fucked up happens, because like this

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Speaker 4: is what happens when you fuck with normal people all

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Speaker 4: the time in pursuit of your media empire.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, there's something like that. I'd be like, yo,

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Speaker 3: that's wild. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I feel like a lot of the takes like people

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Speaker 1: were like anybody who is sad that bad things are

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Speaker 1: happening to these people is like a capitalist piece of shit.

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Speaker 1: Like I don't By the way, there are no takes

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Speaker 1: that are that strong, but like, you know, like I

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Speaker 1: don't know, I don't I feel like I don't have

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Speaker 1: to hate, Like I can feel sorry for these characters

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Speaker 1: at the same time as like recognizing that they are

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Speaker 1: part of a system that is completely corrupt and like

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Speaker 1: that this is so.

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Speaker 4: By that logic, you'd be like the Sopranos is disgusting,

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Speaker 4: they're murderers.

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Speaker 2: Yeah exactly.

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Speaker 1: I'm just like, no, that's what drama is like, shows

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Speaker 1: us bad people doing bad things, but like you get

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Speaker 1: to see their humanity and like fall for them a

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Speaker 1: little bit.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: That's the part that fucks with you is when you

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Speaker 4: begin to side with the capitalist ship bag who's a

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Speaker 4: fascist wannabe who's trying to bring about the demise of

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Speaker 4: American democracy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and you.

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Speaker 4: Can also feel bad that he's a shook one who

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Speaker 4: has no ability to deal with his father's law.

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Speaker 1: What a what a penultimate episode for Roman?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but uh.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, I've got a lot of I've got

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Speaker 1: a lot of wagers on the final episode. I think

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Speaker 1: it's going to be coming through. Got some prop that

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Speaker 1: Miles who won this one, I'm gonna say covers that

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Speaker 1: winners right hand. Yeah, because I feel like this is

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Speaker 1: as big of a final episode as we've seen since

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Speaker 1: Game of Thrones probably right. Oh yeah, I hated it,

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Speaker 1: which was Yeah, that was a disaster. I don't know,

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Speaker 1: Breaking Bad was one that felt didn't it was huge

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Speaker 1: and people felt like it stuck the landing.

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Speaker 2: I wasn't as big a fan.

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Speaker 4: I wasn't like, oh that's I don't know how many

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Speaker 4: I'm like, oh, that was the best one, even like Sopranos,

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Speaker 4: Like I was like, I think I think it's good

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Speaker 4: in that it elegantly wrapped up the show and left

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Speaker 4: people thinking. And you can talk a lot about it,

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Speaker 4: but I don't know, like I'm one of those people

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Speaker 4: who like won't watch, Like I've never seen the Seinfeld finale.

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Speaker 3: Because I just refused to watch it because.

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Speaker 4: I heard it was bad and be I don't want

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Speaker 4: to like be like and that's the end of it,

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Speaker 4: because it just feels like a show that can exist.

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Speaker 1: Those are your friends and you don't want them to

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Speaker 1: go away because you will also watch it exactly because methods.

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Speaker 4: Right, because Kramer is my favorite guy ever on and

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Speaker 4: off camera.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think Sopranos and Seinfeld are like one side

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Speaker 1: of it where it's like kind of a fuck you

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Speaker 1: final episode where it's like, yeah, we're actually giving you

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Speaker 1: not what you want, but they do it artfully. I

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Speaker 1: think Sopranos is one of the best to ever do it,

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Speaker 1: if not the US six feet Under kind of just

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Speaker 1: gave you all like they were just like, all right,

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Speaker 1: we're gonna show you how everyone dies, right, Just it

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Speaker 1: was like fan service in the best way possible. I

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Speaker 1: feel like if I had to guess which direction Succession

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Speaker 1: would go, it would probably be more in the Sopranos

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Speaker 1: Seinfeld direction.

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Speaker 4: I think maybe I don't know. Again, in my mind,

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Speaker 4: i'd be like, yo, I hope they get.

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Speaker 2: Got just taken out.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I would be like, yo, yes, if it's by.

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Speaker 2: And they just like, oh, that this ship was going

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Speaker 2: to happen.

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Speaker 3: That was Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I mean the last time we saw Jeremy Strong's character,

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Speaker 1: he was swimming in the ocean. I'm just saying it's

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Speaker 1: not true. Out of the realm of this whole ship.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, it's wild.

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Speaker 2: And then whole ship wait what the whole entire his

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Speaker 2: whole ship.

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Speaker 4: Bro just wow, gets his ass man, he's floating with

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Speaker 4: his head back.

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Speaker 3: He doesn't see this ship coming. Yeah, this whole shit.

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Speaker 1: Gets too busy thinking about Gojo. There's also news being

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Speaker 1: made by Las Culturistas Big Money Players Network, super produced

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Speaker 1: by our same super producer on AJS and and superducer

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Speaker 1: Becca Ramas. So Bowen was talking about how when he

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Speaker 1: was on the Aquafina show, Yeah, that they were shooting

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Speaker 1: in the same studio in Queen's I think as Succession

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Speaker 1: and Jeremy Strong came into their set and asks yeah yeah,

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Speaker 1: and asked where the bathroom was and was told and

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Speaker 1: then uh so, I'll just read directly from Bowen's quote,

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Speaker 1: So Jeremy leaves ten minutes past and a production assistant

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Speaker 1: from Succession comes into the office and goes, hi, was

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Speaker 1: Jeremy just in here and they were like, yeah, he was.

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Speaker 2: He went to the bathroom. And then this PA.

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Speaker 1: Goes, did he ask where it was? Did he come

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Speaker 1: here to ask you where the bathroom was? And they

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Speaker 1: were like yeah, why and the PA says, ah, he

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Speaker 1: has a scene today where he has to ask someone

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Speaker 1: where the bathroom is. And then Bowen Yang was saying,

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Speaker 1: I think that is method to such a ridiculous degree

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Speaker 1: that he must be in on the joke.

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Speaker 2: Is his theory right.

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Speaker 4: Like to the point if there's like an exasperated pa

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Speaker 4: like he was like he's been doing, it's because it

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Speaker 4: sounds like the same thing of like, was my dad

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Speaker 4: doing this stupid bit where he's asking where the bathroom is?

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Speaker 3: Right because he knows where it is? Oh my god.

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Speaker 4: And then it's fun for that person because when they

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Speaker 4: go finally find Jeremy go you had to ask where

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Speaker 4: the bathrooms like I didn't know where it was.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so let's I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I can't I can't do it, but I respect the

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Speaker 1: hell out of anybody who can do a Kendle Roy impression.

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Speaker 1: Somebody just did one on Twitter and I love it

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Speaker 1: so much where there's so specific, so annoying.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, because it's also like a it's like a total

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Speaker 4: lack of soul and charisma too, but with just a

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Speaker 4: little bit.

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Speaker 3: It's a really hard needle to thread.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, just devoured, no soul, no any no confidence, but

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Speaker 1: like somehow propped up by circumstance, but then has like

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Speaker 1: also just has this entire bible of like tech bro

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Speaker 1: speak right right.

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Speaker 2: Right, He's just drawing on it all times. It's so wild.

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Speaker 1: Anyways, enjoy your succession finale succession watchers. We're gonna take

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Speaker 1: a break and we'll come back and talk about news

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Speaker 1: that doesn't have to do with my friends from Wastar Roco.

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Speaker 3: But maybe sharks.

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Speaker 1: Maybe sharks, not baby sharks. Parents don't worry, and we're back.

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Speaker 1: And I know I told you it wasn't gonna be

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Speaker 1: baby sharks. But when I talked you think the sea,

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Speaker 1: you think lighthouses and seamless transition.

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Speaker 2: Uh.

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Speaker 1: Ten lighthouses that for generations have stood along American shorelines

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Speaker 1: protecting mariners from peril, are being sold at auction by

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Speaker 1: the federal government.

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Speaker 3: Ah, because we don't need them no more. Huh.

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Speaker 2: I guess we don't need them no more.

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Speaker 1: I feel like right, Yeah, that's what they're saying. We

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Speaker 1: don't need them no more because gps.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we don't need them no more.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, we don't need the but the lights where the

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Speaker 4: cliffs are and ship where're gonna hit You're gonna run

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Speaker 4: run aground.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I mean, isn't there something romantic about

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Speaker 3: a lighthouse? Oh?

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Speaker 2: Love it? I love it so much.

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Speaker 3: I've said that as someone who's never even been in

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Speaker 3: a fucking.

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Speaker 1: Lighthouse, never even on miles. Aren't the idea of them?

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Speaker 1: It's a lighting so dramatic.

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Speaker 4: I think the first lighthouse ever saw it was like

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Speaker 4: on a bag of cape Cod chips or something.

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Speaker 1: And that's all you need to see, you get it.

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Speaker 1: That's what's good about lighthouses. They are not subtle. They

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Speaker 1: are just standing there being dramatic narcissists.

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Speaker 2: Giant sea dicks. Look at my land dick.

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Speaker 1: Sea dominating the land ee seafaring folk.

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Speaker 4: So you can how much do we know? How much

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Speaker 4: like a lighthouse is going for? Is it even worth it?

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Speaker 4: Or is it just like for someone who's so obsessed

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Speaker 4: with lighthouses, like that's what it's going to appeal to.

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Speaker 1: About one and fifty lighthouses have been transferred, eighty or

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Speaker 1: so given away, and another seventy auctioned, raising more than

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Speaker 1: ten million dollars. So that's not that much.

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Speaker 2: I guess given away.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so only seventy years old and all of that

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Speaker 1: is totaling up to ten million dollars. I'm no math wizard,

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Speaker 1: but I think that's less than a million dollars each.

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Speaker 1: So they seem like you can get them pretty cheap, since, yeah,

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Speaker 1: get them, we're given away for free. I did have

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Speaker 1: an opportunity my to talk to some people who have

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Speaker 1: been to lighthouses in person, and they say they're boring.

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Speaker 1: The plotting is predictable, the light just goes around in

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Speaker 1: a circle the whole time.

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Speaker 2: And they're smaller than you expect them to be.

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Speaker 3: Oh okay, like yeah, exactly, predictable and smart.

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Speaker 1: Without the magnetic charisma that from that, they just stand

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Speaker 1: there and don't do shit.

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Speaker 2: Anyways.

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Speaker 1: Shout out to the lighthouse keepers out there. You know,

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Speaker 1: some Trump workers at mar A Lago moved boxes of

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Speaker 1: papers the day before the FBI visit, according to a report.

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Speaker 2: But I feel like I read six months ago, right.

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Speaker 3: Everything sounds like the same thing over and over again.

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Speaker 4: It's like, yeah, I think that went from like being

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Speaker 4: a rumor to now, isn't that person like cooperating?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, isn't that why this has happened?

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Speaker 1: So yeah, okay, so maybe we'll get them this time, folks.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, who knows, Maybe this is it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, like on John Oliver, you hit the button, You're like,

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Speaker 4: we've got him, bring out the band yet?

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Speaker 3: Nah? Yep, maybe not.

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Speaker 1: This turns out not turns out he will be our

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Speaker 1: next president, even if he's in jail.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, somehow, or Ron de Santis can or H'm sorry,

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Speaker 4: Rob DeSantis can pardon him.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, as he said, that's.

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Speaker 4: Been his new things, like you know, and i'd i'd

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Speaker 4: pardon the president. You're like, oh my god, dude, you

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Speaker 4: you're already losing. Yeah, by saying shit like this.

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Speaker 3: He is.

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Speaker 1: Just a professional kiss ass. Like that's all he does

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Speaker 1: is kiss people's ass and like it. Now he's moved

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Speaker 1: on to Elon Musk from Trump. But like his first

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Speaker 1: deal with Trump, where like when he first became a

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Speaker 1: politician was just being a Trump guy, like more than

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Speaker 1: anybody else, dressed his baby up in like Maga outfits

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Speaker 1: in the campaign ads, and he's like and.

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Speaker 3: Donald Trump saved our country, babe. That's my favorite part, Like.

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Speaker 1: Come on, yeah, when we get on to Rob, yeah,

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Speaker 1: which I'm not above taking a nickname the Trump gives

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Speaker 1: someone and using it if I don't like that person.

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Speaker 1: So Rob DeSantis has signed a bill that would basically

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Speaker 1: protect Elon Musk from lawsuits if his rockets blow up

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Speaker 1: and kill workers.

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Speaker 3: Yep, that easy, folks. That's all it takes was to

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Speaker 3: completely just.

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Speaker 4: Jet fuck your campaign announcement on Twitter. Uh, and then

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Speaker 4: you can get a bill that I don't know, this

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Speaker 4: is really wild. It's it's more than that, it says.

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Speaker 4: The bill expands the definition of spaceflight entity to include

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Speaker 4: any entity authorized to conduct spaceflight activities beyond one solely

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Speaker 4: associated with the United States Federal Aviation Administration, opening up

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Speaker 4: which entities in the broader industry will qualify for the

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Speaker 4: expanded immunity.

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Speaker 3: And the bill also.

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Speaker 4: Cuts out language ascribing liability to spaceflight entities for damage

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Speaker 4: caused from quote inherent risks. Instead, the bill brought into

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Speaker 4: scope of liability immunity to include all space flight activities

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Speaker 4: to go ahead, get reckless.

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Speaker 3: Let this shit fucking do.

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Speaker 4: I don't know that, you know, we see stuff like

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Speaker 4: this all the time, but it feels very convenient for

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Speaker 4: Elon Musk and I got I hope fucking nothing happens

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Speaker 4: with a bill like this where like it's necessary, but

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Speaker 4: holy shit, that's not that's not the kind of that's

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Speaker 4: like a regulation you want to see.

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Speaker 1: That was the question that popped in my mind the

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Speaker 1: last time he had a rocket launch and the whole

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Speaker 1: shit blew up and there were giant chunks of rocket

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Speaker 1: that were like falling on like what. One just like

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Speaker 1: completely obliterated a mini van that was like parked nearby,

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Speaker 1: And I was like, well, they're going to be killing people,

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Speaker 1: Like they're lucky this didn't kill anybody, even though it

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Speaker 1: was an unmanned launch. They're lucky that the giant chunks

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Speaker 1: of shrapnel falling out of the sky didn't kill anyone.

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Speaker 1: So like, how is that going to be continue to

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Speaker 1: be profitable?

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Speaker 4: And I think all that did was basically give Elin

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Speaker 4: the imaginations like how do I get Ron DeSantis to

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Speaker 4: make it legal for chunks of rocket to hit people?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 1: Also, people from his campaign, or at least like his supporters,

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Speaker 1: seemed to be admitting that the launch was an l

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Speaker 1: No Radio host Eric ericson email supporters of Desanta's about

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Speaker 1: the mishap and said it was bold.

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Speaker 2: It turned out to be a mistake.

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Speaker 3: Oh but worry not.

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Speaker 2: So so we'll see.

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Speaker 1: John Wick five is in early development for the Gunfu Crew. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I've only seen the first one and probably alight.

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Speaker 1: I've heard the third one is really good.

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Speaker 2: I watched the fourth one. It had some cool shit,

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Speaker 2: but I get.

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Speaker 4: The appeal of just watching people like wile out like

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Speaker 4: in an ultra violent way. I just I think it's

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Speaker 4: one of those things where like when there's five of

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Speaker 4: a movie, I start going, nah, nah, you're going too

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Speaker 4: fast for me, and I'm not going to hitch up.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I get it. You were you were salty that

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Speaker 3: someone sucked up your dog. I always been with you

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Speaker 3: on that. And then there was like, now there's going

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Speaker 3: to be a fifth one.

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Speaker 1: Mm hm, this is right, which is especially signirising to

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Speaker 1: people who saw John Wick.

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Speaker 2: For I will just say that, oh really yeah, not.

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Speaker 3: Just that's enough.

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Speaker 1: Yeah interesting yeah uh. And finally let's wrap it all

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Speaker 1: back around. Yep, they're saying the Great White shark population

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Speaker 1: is booming. Great news, because it was that you were

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Speaker 1: in danger. They were being hunted after an irresponsible movie

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Speaker 1: that we never advocate for on this show called Jaws

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Speaker 1: came out and suddenly everyone was like, they're killing machines.

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Speaker 1: We've got to protect our beaches, and you know, it

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Speaker 1: was very bad. The writer of the novel Jaws like

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Speaker 1: ended up spending the last decades of his life like

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Speaker 1: lobbying and working on behalf of to keep ye keep

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Speaker 1: sharks from being killed. It seems like, you know, they

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Speaker 1: have been able to get their population levels back up

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Speaker 1: to normal or like something approaching normal, not like the

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Speaker 1: horrifying low levels they were at before. And the mainstream

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Speaker 1: media also give you two guesses as to how they're

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Speaker 1: approaching this story.

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Speaker 3: They're just like me. They're saying, wat's out.

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Speaker 1: They're gonna bite your whole shit, bite your whole shit, America.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I already know, because I've already seen one, Like

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Speaker 4: I've already seen an article that's like, you're not gonna

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Speaker 4: get your whole shit bit by a shark.

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Speaker 3: Relax. The chances are very low of you getting your

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Speaker 3: whole shit bit.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think this is This is also good news

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Speaker 1: for mainstream media publications because they can just recycle the

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Speaker 1: content that everyone forgets from the summer of two thousand

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Speaker 1: and one, because the Time magazine issue that was on

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Speaker 1: the new stand when nine to eleven happened was a

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Speaker 1: Summer of the Shark picture of a great white shark

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Speaker 1: coming at you on the on the cover. So maybe

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Speaker 1: they'll maybe they'll just be able to kind of recycle

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Speaker 1: some of that.

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Speaker 3: It's wild though, how like there was a shark question mark.

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Speaker 2: That's what they'll put out.

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Speaker 3: There's like one story of this, uh like Connecticut woman

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Speaker 3: who had her who got her her not her whole ship,

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Speaker 3: but her lower ship bit by a shark, And it's

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Speaker 3: like every news site just has to get on it

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Speaker 3: because it says bites off leg.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I am regrettably going to be reading

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Speaker 1: that article. But uh and you're so jealous jealous ah

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Speaker 1: lucky ah bite my whole ship.

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Speaker 2: I want to get my whole ship bit.

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Speaker 1: Anyways. Uh, those are some of the things that are

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Speaker 1: trending on this Friday, May Yeah, sick. We are off

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Speaker 1: on Monday for a Memorial Day. We are back on

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Speaker 1: Tuesday with a whole last episode.

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Speaker 3: Of Remembering All the Orcas.

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Speaker 1: Remembering All the Fine orch a reminder that we are

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Speaker 1: changing our publication schedule, not next week but the following week,

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Speaker 1: where we will have one Friday episode, one Monday episode.

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Speaker 1: We'll be doing new things with format. We will be

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Speaker 1: you know, taking submissions, talking with listeners, all a bunch

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Speaker 1: of fun ship. So yeah, all right back Tuesday, whole

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Speaker 1: last episode until then, be kind to each other, be

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Speaker 1: kind to yourself, get the vaccine, don't do nothing about

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Speaker 1: white supremacy, and we will talk to y'all on Tuesday.

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Speaker 3: Bye bye