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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Stephen Ferdeck. I'm the pastor of Elevation

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Speaker 1: Church and this is our podcast. I wanted to thank

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Speaker 1: you for joining us today.

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Speaker 2: Hope this inspires you. Hope it builds your faith.

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Speaker 1: Hope it gives your perspective to see God is moving

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Speaker 1: in your life.

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Speaker 2: Enjoy the message.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to the Do the New You Mindset Masterclass.

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Speaker 1: By the way, if you're this far, you might as

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Speaker 1: well know there were some alternate titles for this conversation

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Speaker 1: between me and my friend Brendan Burchard. Brendan is one

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Speaker 1: of the most sought after performance coaches in the world,

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Speaker 1: so I thought we should call this segment Holy Ghost

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Speaker 1: Life Coach. And he was like, yeah, no, what about

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Speaker 1: what about Mindset master Class. I'm like, yeah, yeah, but

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Speaker 1: what have we called it? Like, what have we called it?

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Speaker 2: After?

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Speaker 1: Amen? You know? Because that's my heart, Like we all

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Speaker 1: say we believe this and in the book, I'm giving

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Speaker 1: you six truths to say over yourself. But after you

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Speaker 1: say amen, like yeah, I believe our last mindset. God

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Speaker 1: is not against me. He's in it with me, working

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Speaker 1: through me, fighting for me. I believe with God there's

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Speaker 1: always a way by faith, I will find it. I

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Speaker 1: believe Christ is in me. I am enough. I believe

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Speaker 1: I'm not stuck unless I stop now after I say amen,

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Speaker 1: which means, so be it?

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Speaker 2: What action do I take? Right?

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Speaker 1: And we're putting these conversations together as a gift to

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Speaker 1: you to take you deeper into what we shared in

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Speaker 1: the book, the six mindsets to become who you were

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Speaker 1: created to be, and this mindset, I really do need

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Speaker 1: a life coach, because I'll tell you what. Putting this

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Speaker 1: in the book to me almost felt like an act

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Speaker 1: of hypocrisy because the mindset this is the shortest one,

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Speaker 1: I guess and the hardest one for me. It goes

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Speaker 1: my joy is my job, and it's like, I don't

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Speaker 1: really want to call joy a job. Joy is supposed

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Speaker 1: to be a sensation, right It overtakes me with a

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Speaker 1: bite of a Hershey bar, or with the glimpse of

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Speaker 1: the sunset. You know, it doesn't have to be something decadent.

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Speaker 1: But joy is this rush that I experience that comes

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Speaker 1: from an event. And the more I study it Brendan

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Speaker 1: in the Bible, the more I study it in life.

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Speaker 1: I'm really hanging on to that quote from Brian Wilson

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Speaker 1: from the Beach Boys that I put in the book,

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Speaker 1: and he's had mental health challenges that a lot of

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Speaker 1: people know about. But you know, the Beach Boys music

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Speaker 1: is so happy and so sunny. And he looks at

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Speaker 1: the documentarian in this movie that I saw about his

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Speaker 1: life and he says, you know, I found out happiness

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Speaker 1: is really hard work, and that hit me. I'm like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: if we're just chasing happiness as an end result and

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Speaker 1: not really taking responsibility to own our emotions, that's what

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Speaker 1: we want to get into a little bit today with Brendan,

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Speaker 1: how to own your emotions so you don't run around

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Speaker 1: saying stuff like they didn't make me happy, or I

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Speaker 1: left that company because it wasn't making me fulfilled. Well, happiness, fulfillment,

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Speaker 1: all of those things aren't something that someone else can

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Speaker 1: make you. And I think that ownership process of our

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Speaker 1: own joy is a lifelong process, yes, a moment by

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Speaker 1: moment process. You know in the church, people say they

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Speaker 1: stole my joy, Then what in the world were you

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Speaker 1: doing putting it where they could steal it.

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Speaker 2: You should have locked it up, You should have had

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Speaker 2: it somewhere safe.

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Speaker 1: You should have put your joy somewhere other than just

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Speaker 1: how somebody else treats you. But really, like I told you,

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Speaker 1: in so many of these mindsets, these are the things

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Speaker 1: that I preach to me. Because nobody is going to

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Speaker 1: vote me for the naturally happiest human alive. That's not

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Speaker 1: my disposition. That doesn't mean that it can't be my destination.

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Speaker 1: Though I can become more joyful, I can become more grateful.

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Speaker 2: I can practice these things.

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Speaker 1: And that's why I brought the world's best life coach

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Speaker 1: to help me. So make me happy, Brendan, it's your

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Speaker 1: job make me happy, make me joyful.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if I can make you happy. I'll

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Speaker 2: start with the coaching piece. He said. A second ago,

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Speaker 2: they stole my joy. And a lot of people say that.

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Speaker 2: I say, no one stole your joy. You gave them

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Speaker 2: your attention. Wow, that's what happened. You took your That's

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Speaker 2: what happened. What happened, No one took it. You gave

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Speaker 2: them your attention, you, you gave them your belief, you

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Speaker 2: gave them, you know, your thought pattern. Instead of owning

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Speaker 2: the fact that you control this. You're the gatekeeper up here,

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Speaker 2: you're the generator up here, You're the commander up here,

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Speaker 2: and when you know you own this, you start to

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Speaker 2: own your emotions. And I always love to tell people

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Speaker 2: there's a difference between emotion and feelings different. A nice

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Speaker 2: way to think about is we have impulsive emotions and

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Speaker 2: we have ongoing feelings. And let me give you a difference.

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Speaker 2: If you go into a haunted house, right and someone

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Speaker 2: jumps out the corner, that fear that hits you, that

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Speaker 2: is automatic, it's physical, and it's impulsive. Fear just hits you.

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Speaker 2: You get scared, right. But if you go home at

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Speaker 2: night and now it's seven o'clock at night, you're safe

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Speaker 2: in your house, the doors are locked, your husband or

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Speaker 2: your spouse is there, things are good, and you still

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Speaker 2: you start kind of getting spooked. I feel like something

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Speaker 2: as bad as going to happen. Now that ongoing feeling,

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Speaker 2: you're generating that with your thoughts. The first one you

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Speaker 2: meet it fear scared. That's impulsive, that's automatic. An emotion

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Speaker 2: is like that just happens in your body. A psychologists

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Speaker 2: found emotions pass usually in ninety seconds to three minutes.

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Speaker 2: The emotion actually pass. Now our thoughts really do take over,

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Speaker 2: and our thoughts are forming a story. Our thoughts are

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Speaker 2: telling us what something means. Our thoughts are either taking

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Speaker 2: command of us or we're in take command of them,

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Speaker 2: because we can say, wait, I'm in the house, everything's okay.

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Speaker 2: Oh I just got scared earlier, and I'm holding on

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Speaker 2: to that. Unhappiness is very similar. Something can happen, it's

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Speaker 2: an unhappy situation. Someone was mean to us, you know,

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Speaker 2: something awful happened. It makes me feel bad. There's grief there,

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Speaker 2: there's hurt there, and we can feel that like in

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Speaker 2: that immediate emotion, it's just like, ah, that I feel bad.

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Speaker 2: But if later on it's an ongoing feeling of happiness,

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Speaker 2: I promise you're architecting your thoughts in such a way

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Speaker 2: it's creating the ongoing happiness. So think about it. Is

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Speaker 2: the situations of your life, the bad events of your life,

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Speaker 2: are they still dragging on in the feelings of today.

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Speaker 2: That's where we say, oh, I got to take back

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Speaker 2: command of the architecture of my thoughts here, because that's

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Speaker 2: what's really screwing me up. That's what's stealing my joy

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Speaker 2: is I'm not architecting the thoughts. It would give me

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Speaker 2: that And then you hear me teach all the time,

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Speaker 2: I'm always sharing this idea that my dominant metaphor in

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Speaker 2: my life is about a power plant.

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Speaker 1: I love it, and you'll listen to the power plant.

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Speaker 2: This change your life? Is crazy, this changes my life

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Speaker 2: every day. Yeah, And the idea is, you know, the

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Speaker 2: power plant doesn't have energy. It actually generates energy. So

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Speaker 2: technically a power plant takes energy from one level of resource,

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Speaker 2: a rushing stream or solar or whatever. It's taking energy

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Speaker 2: from one level, lower level of utilization. It's transforming that

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Speaker 2: energy into a higher level of utilization, and it's transmitting it.

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Speaker 2: And I love it because the power plant doesn't have energy. Oh,

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Speaker 2: it's it's taking energy from one lower level, it's transforming

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Speaker 2: it and transmitting into a higher level. That means I

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Speaker 2: can do that in my own life. You know, I'm

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Speaker 2: feeling a low level of energy today. I don't have motivation,

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Speaker 2: I don't have joy, I don't have love in my heart. Actually,

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Speaker 2: I woke up kind of grumpy. Well, that's a low

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Speaker 2: level of utilization. It's my job. How do I take

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Speaker 2: the energy of the world or my situation, my life,

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Speaker 2: my relationships, and how do I take ownership as a

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Speaker 2: power plant? And how do I up level that? Why

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Speaker 2: do that with my thoughts. My thoughts are my turbines.

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Speaker 2: My thoughts are the thing that can spin that energy

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Speaker 2: up into a higher level. And now I can be

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Speaker 2: a person of goodness, I can be a person of cheer,

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Speaker 2: I can be a person of joy. And is that

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Speaker 2: choice to be the power plant of the feelings of

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Speaker 2: my life that has made my life more fulfilling because

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Speaker 2: before that I was at the whim of everybody else

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Speaker 2: and everything else. Because see, most of the world right now,

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Speaker 2: it's a pretty low level energy. There's a lot of

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Speaker 2: division and vitriol and hate and us against them. It's

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Speaker 2: low level. But you can say, I'm not going to

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Speaker 2: live in that mud puddle. I'm going to take the

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Speaker 2: water out of that mud puddle. I'm going to turn

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Speaker 2: it through these turbines of joy and faith and reasoning

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Speaker 2: and logic and a desire for an extraordinary life. I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna spin that up and boom, I'm gonna feel different

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Speaker 2: and transmit different.

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Speaker 1: Yes. See, man, now you made me want to be

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Speaker 1: in church. I want it to be ten o'clock on

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Speaker 1: a Sunday morning. I want to him and beat three

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Speaker 1: organ because I want to talk about the power plant

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Speaker 1: and Jesus said, you will receive power when the Holy

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Speaker 1: Spirit comes on you, and you will be my witnesses

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Speaker 1: in Jerusalem. Judea Samaria.

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Speaker 2: What's that.

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Speaker 1: That's taking the power and then transforming that power into

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Speaker 1: a witness.

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Speaker 2: So you see what he just did.

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Speaker 1: He said, I'm gonna give you power from another place,

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Speaker 1: and then i want your faith to be the turbine

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Speaker 1: by which you take what I've given you and take

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Speaker 1: it to the world. And that's so much more empowering

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Speaker 1: to me than it is to sit.

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Speaker 2: There and go, Lord, give me joy.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to get people out of this pattern that

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Speaker 1: we have Brendan sometimes of going Lord.

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Speaker 2: Give me joy, give me joy, give me joy.

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Speaker 1: And the Lord gave you somebody to help that would

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Speaker 1: have brought you joy if you would have helped that person.

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Speaker 1: And I also think that we should talk about this,

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Speaker 1: isn't the happiness that we want often hidden in the

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Speaker 1: thing that we resist.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and you said it earlier about peace, and our

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Speaker 2: friend Trent Shelton talks about protecting your peace. So I

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Speaker 2: think the first part of our conversation today has all

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Speaker 2: been about generating it, about generating joy, generating the emotions

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Speaker 2: we want to feel being the power plant. But there's

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Speaker 2: another job we have. So if the first job we

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Speaker 2: have is being the generator, the second job we have,

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Speaker 2: which is really important today, is we got to be

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Speaker 2: the gatekeeper, the gatekeeper of our joy and our happiness.

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Speaker 2: He talked about the enemy, and sometimes the enemy is

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Speaker 2: taking that and we constantly continue abusing ourselves and taking

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Speaker 2: away our own happiness by engaging in things that we

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Speaker 2: know are bad for us or are not good. I'll

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Speaker 2: give you a convenient example right now about social media.

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Speaker 2: A lot of people don't understand that. All of social

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Speaker 2: media research has shown it doesn't make us feel good.

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Speaker 2: If you're generating and you're the creator, or you're doing

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Speaker 2: it to create relationships, it can be a very positive

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Speaker 2: and entertaining thing, but for most people actually creates a

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Speaker 2: low level of anxiety and stress. Because here's what happens

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Speaker 2: when you're scrolling. And this is really important to understand.

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Speaker 2: If you're in a bad mood, be careful about disengaging

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Speaker 2: from the world and going to social media. Here's what

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Speaker 2: they found from the research. This is amazing. When you're scrolling.

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Speaker 2: Every time you scroll past something, the brain has to

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Speaker 2: do three things. First, as you're scrolling, the brain has

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Speaker 2: to make a judgment, a decision. Is this worthy of

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Speaker 2: stopping and paying attention to? Is this worthy of my attention?

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Speaker 2: So immediate judgment is it worthy? Is it good? Do

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Speaker 2: I like it? Judgment? Second thing is comparison. Am I

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Speaker 2: like that? Do I do things like that? Does my

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Speaker 2: house look like that? Does my kitchen look like that?

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Speaker 2: Did I wear that thing like that? So we compare,

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Speaker 2: and then the third thing is we end up having

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Speaker 2: what's called contempt, which is division. We go, well, they're

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Speaker 2: like that, I'm not, And so think about that. Most

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Speaker 2: people scroll pass over a thousand posts a day, so

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Speaker 2: a thousand times you just wired your brain for more

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Speaker 2: judgment and for more comparison. Now, would you ever go

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Speaker 2: to teenager and go, here's what I want to do.

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Speaker 2: I want to train you all day to be more judgmental. Wow,

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Speaker 2: I want to train you all day to compare yourself

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Speaker 2: to more people. We know there's or negative behaviors, but

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Speaker 2: we do them. And most people are on now social

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Speaker 2: media an hour to two hours a day, consuming, not generating, consuming,

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Speaker 2: just like blindly scrolling through. And you have to understand

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Speaker 2: you're not being the gatekeeper of your own peace and

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Speaker 2: your own mind. Every time you're scrolling through, you're training yourself.

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Speaker 2: This is not scrolling passively. This is training. You are

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Speaker 2: training yourself to be more judgmental. That's why you're unhappy.

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Speaker 2: You judge everything. Why is everyone so judgmental today? Because

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Speaker 2: they train themselves a thousand times today. Why is everyone

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Speaker 2: comparing themselves? Why do we have us versus them? Because

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Speaker 2: we're comparing ourselves all day. We're not gatekeeping our minds.

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Speaker 2: It's just like when you hang around bad people. And

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Speaker 2: I know that's a bad phrase, you know to say

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Speaker 2: bad people, but you know, people whose behaviors cause negative

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Speaker 2: results in your life. The more you hang around them,

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Speaker 2: the more you become like them. Well, the more you

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Speaker 2: live in a land of judgment in comparison, the more

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Speaker 2: you become that, and it steals your joy. You're like, well,

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Speaker 2: it's stealing my joy. It's like, no, you scroll the

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Speaker 2: way your joy, and so I really want to be

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Speaker 2: attentive to that. Pay attention to the news you consume,

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Speaker 2: Pay attention to the people you're hanging out with, pay

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Speaker 2: attention to the quality of what you are consuming, Pay

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Speaker 2: attention to the quality of your entertainment, because all of

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Speaker 2: that is either isn't in the well or it's empowering you,

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Speaker 2: it's lifting you. And I think that that's the number

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Speaker 2: one reason most people aren't happy is because we live

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Speaker 2: in a consumptive society as and we're in that consumer

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Speaker 2: mindset and we're just taking everything in and now we're

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Speaker 2: comparing ourselves and we're judging everybody. It's hard to be

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Speaker 2: a happy person if I got to judge all day,

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Speaker 2: if I got to compare all day, and I'll say

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Speaker 2: this last piece about it, it's mentally exhausting. Remember it's

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Speaker 2: a thousand decisions. I just made a thousand decisions. No wonder,

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Speaker 2: no wonder. You get at the end of the day

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Speaker 2: and you're like, I just don't know why I don't

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Speaker 2: take more action. I don't know why I didn't decide

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Speaker 2: to write that book. I don't know why I decide

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Speaker 2: I didn't decide to write the song today. I didn't

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Speaker 2: know why I did. You know why you didn't decide

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Speaker 2: to do anything? Your decision bank account is bankrupt because

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Speaker 2: you gave away all your decisions to each scroll and

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Speaker 2: you do I didn't even know it. You're mentally fatigued,

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Speaker 2: you're not unhappy, You're exhausted.

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Speaker 1: And I think it's a thief in the night. In

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Speaker 1: other words, we don't see it happening. It doesn't break

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Speaker 1: in in the middle of the day. Hey, here, I

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Speaker 1: am to steal your joy. I had so many many

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Speaker 1: thoughts about what you were saying that I will not

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Speaker 1: possibly be able to recap it as well as you

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Speaker 1: just said it. But let me ask you if I

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Speaker 1: heard this part right, Judgment destroys joy. When I'm wired

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Speaker 1: for judgment, it destroys my capacity for joy. And number two,

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Speaker 1: sometimes I don't lose my joy, like, oh I've lost

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Speaker 1: my joy? What happened? No, I leaked it little by little,

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Speaker 1: scroll by scroll, swipe by swipe, thing that I took

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Speaker 1: to heart by thing that I took to heart. Why

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Speaker 1: that's important to me is I don't want to just

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Speaker 1: approach this like a crisis management situation, when really it's

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Speaker 1: about decisions in the moment and training yourself. The training

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Speaker 1: piece is huge, because I'm not only taking responsibility for

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Speaker 1: my emotions, but the fact that if I'm not in

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Speaker 1: a good place, I am not.

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Speaker 2: Going to be any good.

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Speaker 1: Two or four of those around me that I'm called

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Speaker 1: to serve. So for those who think it's selfish, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I get it. The idea of just be happy at

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Speaker 1: all costs, or just make yourself happy, or after all

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Speaker 1: you deserve to be happy, Yeah, that can start to

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Speaker 1: get kind of empty for those of us who know

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Speaker 1: that there's a bigger purpose. And sometimes I'm supposed to

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Speaker 1: be sad because what I saw was sad, what I

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Speaker 1: went through was sad. Sometimes I'm supposed to have seasons

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Speaker 1: where I don't feel the most excited, and some of

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Speaker 1: those fallow seasons in my life led to the more

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Speaker 1: fertile seasons.

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Speaker 2: And I have to learn to embrace that. So my

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Speaker 2: joy is my job.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't mean I'm always reaping blessings and singing praises. No,

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Speaker 1: sometimes it means I'm sowing in tears. But guess what

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Speaker 1: the Bible also teaches those who sow in tears will

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Speaker 1: reap enjoy. Now think about that. What is sewing it's

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Speaker 1: work and what is the consequence joy? I reap enjoy

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Speaker 1: when I sow in tears, which is why I want

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Speaker 1: you to work on this. That's why I go to therapy. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's not a confessional. I'm actually saying that, like I

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Speaker 1: tell you that I do physical exercise, of course I

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Speaker 1: work on my mind.

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Speaker 2: Of course I have to use that thing all the time.

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Speaker 1: I don't have to do bicep curls to live, but

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Speaker 1: I have to think to live. I have to think

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Speaker 1: to speak, I have to think to process my life,

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Speaker 1: to decide what to do, to figure out how to respond.

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Speaker 1: So of course I'm going to find a gem for

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Speaker 1: my mind as a man thinking in his heart, So

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Speaker 1: is he? Do you owe this to the God who

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Speaker 1: gave you life to take the mind he gave you

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Speaker 1: and manage it and just get this as a baseline.

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Speaker 1: It's mind to manage, it's mind to manage you. Hear

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Speaker 1: this saying sometimes in physical exercise, you can't out train

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Speaker 1: a bad diet. Right, That's like a real popular thing.

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Speaker 1: I just heard this in our conversation Brendan. You can't

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Speaker 1: out gratitude a bad gatekeeper.

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Speaker 2: M h.

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Speaker 1: If you're just letting stuff in, letting stuff in, letting

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Speaker 1: stuff in, yeah, I'm gon fix it with a journal

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Speaker 1: for two minutes, even if it does have a cat

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Speaker 1: on the cover, and.

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Speaker 2: Yourself all day and you're shocked you're not healthy.

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Speaker 1: So let's stop letting it in and then just trying

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Speaker 1: to pray it out, let it in, pray it out.

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Speaker 1: Of Course, we all have to deal with negative things.

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Speaker 1: Of course, we're all from time to time gonna watch something,

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Speaker 1: see something. Of Course this is not black and white,

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Speaker 1: but what is important is that you make a decision

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Speaker 1: to own it. And I I just want everybody who's

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Speaker 1: a part of this. I feel like this do the

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Speaker 1: new you mentality. It starts out sounding surface like okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'll do the new me, have my running shoes, I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna get after it. And this guy you know, knew me,

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Speaker 1: knew me, knew me.

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Speaker 2: I've heard it before.

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Speaker 1: And then you start to realize, oh, it's not just

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Speaker 1: that I'm going to start doing things different. It's that

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Speaker 1: I am going to discover the me that was there

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Speaker 1: all along. And I just want to give you hope

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Speaker 1: for this that I believe there is great joy in

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Speaker 1: your future. I believe there is great joy in your present.

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Speaker 1: I believe that there are amazing things happening in your

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Speaker 1: life right now. It's okay if you can't see them.

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Speaker 1: I get to a place every once in a while

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Speaker 1: where I feel like I can't find anything that goes right.

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Speaker 1: But the difference is what do you do when you

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Speaker 1: find yourself there?

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Speaker 2: Do you stay in it? Do you blame it away?

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Speaker 1: I want this to be a pivotal moment in your

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Speaker 1: life where you make the decision. My joy is my

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Speaker 1: job and it's very difficult to have breakthrough and blame

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Speaker 1: at the same time.

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Speaker 2: And I want you to get through this.

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Speaker 1: Whatever the sadness was, whatever they did to you, whatever

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Speaker 1: caused it, I want you to see that there is

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Speaker 1: life beyond it. And so for all of us who

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Speaker 1: don't wake up singing the Hallelujah chorus, for all of

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Speaker 1: us who don't wake up wanting to even see a

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Speaker 1: human being, for all of us who feel like our

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Speaker 1: mood does this and that and the other, just know

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Speaker 1: that God is with you in all of it, and

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Speaker 1: he wants to bring forth joy, even if it means.

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Speaker 2: You have to sow in tears.

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Speaker 1: I want you to get your hard work of happiness mindset.

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Speaker 1: Stop thinking is something that's just either going to happen

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Speaker 1: or it's not. It's something that's going to come from

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Speaker 1: somewhere else. Be a power plant, baby, You got power

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Speaker 1: from on high, the power of the Holy Spirit, lives

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Speaker 1: in you and the turbine that's your tools, whether it's gratitude,

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Speaker 1: whether you're going to put on headphones and walk through

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Speaker 1: exactly what Brennan did, bringing gratefulness for people in your

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Speaker 1: life into your movement until you realize God has been

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Speaker 1: good to me, that you'll do it, and do it

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Speaker 1: and do it again until it becomes a part of you.

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Speaker 1: The Apostle Paul said, rejoice in the Lord always. I'll

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Speaker 1: say it again, Rejoice and again and again and again.

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Speaker 1: It's not a one time decision. It's a commitment in

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Speaker 1: every moment. I hope this helps you today. I hope

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Speaker 1: you feel happy right now. But if you don't, you

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Speaker 1: know a few things to do to help you get

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Speaker 1: there a little quicker and stay a little longer.

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Speaker 2: I'll see you next time. Thank you for joining us.

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Speaker 1: Special thanks to those of you who give generously to

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Speaker 1: this ministry. Is because of you that this ministry is possible.

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Speaker 1: You can click the link in the description to give now,

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Speaker 1: or visit Elevationchurch dot org slash podcast for more information.

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Speaker 1: And if you enjoyed the podcast, you can subscribe. You

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00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:19,480
Speaker 1: can share it with your friends. You can click the

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Speaker 1: share button take a screenshot and share it on your

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Speaker 1: social stories and tag us at Elevation Church. Thanks again

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Speaker 1: for listening.

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Speaker 2: God bless you.