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Speaker 1: Levels to This is an iHeart women's sports production in

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Speaker 1: partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find

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Speaker 1: us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you

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Speaker 1: get your podcasts.

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Speaker 2: Hey, everybody, what's going on? It's your girl, Tarrika Foster Brasby, what's.

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Speaker 3: Up, y'all? Is your girl?

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Speaker 2: Cheryl Swoops And this is the Levels to this podcast,

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Speaker 2: the show where we share that it's levels to the

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Speaker 2: shit that.

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Speaker 4: Women go through.

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Speaker 2: Man, we've got a really great show lined up today.

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Speaker 2: But I realized that last week when we were talking,

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Speaker 2: I didn't get a chance to ask you, like, what

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Speaker 2: were you going to do for New Year's Eve?

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Speaker 4: Like?

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Speaker 2: What was your New Year's Eve plans? How did you

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Speaker 2: bring in twenty twenty five? Before we get off into

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Speaker 2: everything else, I gotta ask you, like.

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Speaker 4: What did you do for twenty twenty five? How you

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Speaker 4: bring it in?

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Speaker 3: Okay?

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Speaker 1: So I'm going to share something real quick with you

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Speaker 1: that I find very hilarious. Okay, So I had this

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Speaker 1: young lady, she was in her twenties. Okay, say to me.

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Speaker 1: A couple days before New Year's Eve. I was at

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Speaker 1: the grocery store and it's a story I go to

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Speaker 1: all the time. I always try to go to her

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Speaker 1: register because she's a fun person, right, She's good at

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Speaker 1: her job all that.

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Speaker 3: So we were talking.

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Speaker 1: I'm in line and I'm getting all this food and

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Speaker 1: she said, oh my gosh, I wish I had your life.

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Speaker 1: And I said, what are you talking about? She said,

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Speaker 1: because I could only imagine how much fun and celebrating

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Speaker 1: you're gonna do on New Year's Eve.

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Speaker 3: So you're already laughing. I said, what makes you think that?

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Speaker 1: Like, I'm gonna be kicking it and partying and celebrating

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Speaker 1: like that. So she was like, don't most celebrities like

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Speaker 1: really go out and do it big on New Year's Eve?

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Speaker 3: I said, listen, celebrity or not. Boo boo. I'm fifty

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Speaker 3: three years old.

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Speaker 4: I'm in the house.

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Speaker 1: My celebrating is sitting at home in my PGS, having

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Speaker 1: me one glass and praying that I can stay awake

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Speaker 1: until midnight.

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Speaker 4: Ah See, I already knew what you were about to say.

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Speaker 3: And she looked at me like, how boring.

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Speaker 4: You've disappointed her show.

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Speaker 3: I did.

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Speaker 1: I surely did, so I'm probably gonna disappoint you and

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Speaker 1: everybody else is listening. I spent my New Year's Eve

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Speaker 1: with my husband in his man cave watching a movie.

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Speaker 1: And then at eleven forty five, we turned the movie

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Speaker 1: off and turn on television so we could do our

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Speaker 1: local little countdown and ball drop. And yeah, that was

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Speaker 1: my New Year's Eve?

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Speaker 3: How about yours? Because I know you did some shit.

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Speaker 4: That was a great New Year's Eve, though it was

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Speaker 4: for me.

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Speaker 3: I loved it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I didn't wake up with a hangover. I didn't have

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Speaker 1: any of that shit to worry.

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Speaker 3: About, so it was that's.

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Speaker 4: Great, complete opposite.

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Speaker 3: Oh already, no, already, no, do tell.

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Speaker 1: Don't play opposite, because I know he was in the streets. Girl,

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Speaker 1: my wretched ass was in somebody club dropping it like

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Speaker 1: it's hot.

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Speaker 3: Girl.

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Speaker 4: I shouldn't have been.

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Speaker 2: I should have been dropping it like it was high.

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Speaker 2: I might have felt better about myself the next day,

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Speaker 2: but I was.

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Speaker 4: Instead. I stood in the.

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Speaker 2: Same place for most of this time and still had

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Speaker 2: a swoll ankle the next day.

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Speaker 4: That's how I know I'm getting old.

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Speaker 1: I was like, wait a minute, ow, wait, what did

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Speaker 1: what just standing?

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Speaker 2: So we went to this little club in downtown Hartford,

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Speaker 2: and mind you, I have literally been spending my New

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Speaker 2: Year's Eve at home too, Greg. It has to work,

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Speaker 2: right as a chef New Year's Eve, it's actually really

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Speaker 2: busy in a restaurant, so he has to work most

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Speaker 2: of the time. So when he gets off at like

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Speaker 2: maybe ten or eleven, hit tied.

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Speaker 3: Like the last couple of years.

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Speaker 2: This man ain't even been awake for New Years. I've

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Speaker 2: been tapping him up down.

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Speaker 4: You know. It's New Year's right, the New Year's here.

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Speaker 2: So this year I hit up my saw Wars and

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Speaker 2: I said, I will not be in the house with

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Speaker 2: this man sleeping on me this year for New Years.

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Speaker 2: We going out, So we did a pregame at my house,

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Speaker 2: at my bar downstairs.

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Speaker 4: It wasn't a lot of us. It was like maybe

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Speaker 4: five or six of us.

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Speaker 2: We did like a pregame downstairs at my bar, and

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Speaker 2: then we left about ten thirty to go to the

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Speaker 2: club downtown. It was ladies free before eleven. I'm still

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Speaker 2: a ladies free kind of girl.

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Speaker 3: So it's my type of club.

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Speaker 2: I'm saying, So, yes, this is maybe the only time

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna be in this club because I don't do

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Speaker 2: clubs no more. I'm forty. Clubs is a little bit

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Speaker 2: too much for me. I'll do a bar, bar and grill,

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Speaker 2: hang out loud. Yeah exactly. But club clubs ain't really

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Speaker 2: my thing no more. But I said, it's New Year's

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Speaker 2: Eve and twenty twenty five was a year of celebration,

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Speaker 2: so I'm gonna do it. Girl went in there, got

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Speaker 2: me a bottle, had us a table, but it was

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Speaker 2: a standing table, so I ain' had no ceat.

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Speaker 4: I had no seat.

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Speaker 1: That's where you started off wrong, right, and you got

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Speaker 1: there before eleven so you could get it free. I

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Speaker 1: got there so you're already standing for a good hour

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Speaker 1: before midnight.

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Speaker 2: I was already standing for a good hour before it

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Speaker 2: even got to twelve.

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Speaker 1: So that's when I would have been like, okay, deuces, okay.

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Speaker 3: So I did good.

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Speaker 2: I left at like twelve thirty, because again I understand,

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Speaker 2: I was there for a good time, not alone time.

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Speaker 2: Got twelve thirty, yeah, I hit the door. But where

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Speaker 2: I messed up, Cheryl is I was drinking tequila because

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Speaker 2: that's where everybody else was drinking.

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Speaker 3: I don't drink tea.

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Speaker 2: Come on, now, you know what my boys shaboozie at

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Speaker 2: drink don't need know me?

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Speaker 4: What the is?

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Speaker 3: This? My bad? My bad?

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Speaker 1: Because I forgot who I was talking to because you're

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Speaker 1: gonna make me reminisce for one.

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Speaker 4: Quick second, which is how I know that you know.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, my bad, my lad. Listen, y'all. I'm just gonna

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Speaker 3: share something with you because I feel like I can.

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Speaker 4: You can't.

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Speaker 3: So I love me some.

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Speaker 1: Tea like this one tea, Tarika. So I was in Connecticut,

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Speaker 1: right maybe last year? Was it Connecticut or were we

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Speaker 1: It was Connecticut? No, it was Connecticut because you swung

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Speaker 1: by the hotel picked me up, y'all. It was like

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Speaker 1: eleven o'clock, and I was like, well, I'm going to drink.

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Speaker 1: Why did my sister pull out the cooler from the

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Speaker 1: back seat full of liquor? Oh my gosh, listen, I

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Speaker 1: already had so much respect for you, but when you

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Speaker 1: did that, I said, oh no, she on a full

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Speaker 1: different level, different level.

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Speaker 4: I legit carry a cooler in my back seat all

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Speaker 4: your long.

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Speaker 3: So I don't know why I asked if you had tequila?

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Speaker 4: Straight?

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Speaker 3: I already knew the answer to that.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, long story short. I had a great time. It

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Speaker 2: was fun to bring in the new year with my sisters.

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Speaker 4: It was great. But also, folks, friends, I'm forty. I'm

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Speaker 4: the oldest hill. I was sleepy by one o'clock.

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Speaker 2: I had a nice little headache the next day, and

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Speaker 2: my ankle was swollen, and I did nothing but sing

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Speaker 2: and stand there.

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Speaker 4: So I know my max.

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Speaker 1: And it's so funny because when I was like younger

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Speaker 1: in my twenties, girl, you couldn't keep me home on

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Speaker 1: New Year's Eve.

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Speaker 3: I know. I spent almost every New Year's or every

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Speaker 3: other New Year in Las Vegas. Yeah, I was going

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Speaker 3: to turn up for real.

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Speaker 1: And now I get excited to be in my house

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Speaker 1: and able to either get in my bed early or

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Speaker 1: get in my bed at twelve oh one.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. See that's it.

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Speaker 3: So I do have one question for you before we

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Speaker 3: take it to the next level.

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Speaker 1: Yes, So are you one of those that superstitious about

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Speaker 1: black eyed peas?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: For New Year's Yeah, I have black eyed peas, collar greens, cornbread.

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Speaker 2: I'm one of those who I had a dollar in

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Speaker 2: my pocket because you gotta have money in your pocket

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Speaker 2: on New Year's when it strikes twelve.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, wash house gotta be clean.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm one of those one hundred percent koodo me

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Speaker 2: or black superstitions. Yeah, but you understand where the black

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Speaker 2: eyed peas can't understand where it.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I do.

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Speaker 1: I totally understood the whole story, tradition, all of that.

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Speaker 1: My thing is, I've never liked black eyed peas ah

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Speaker 1: okay ever, But can I tell you what might make

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Speaker 1: them better? You can, but I'm not gonna like them.

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Speaker 1: There's something about a black eyed pea that it ain't

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Speaker 1: for me.

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Speaker 3: So I needed a bean.

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Speaker 1: I know it was black eyed peas, but I did

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Speaker 1: red beans and race girl.

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Speaker 4: That ain't the same.

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Speaker 1: I had my collagrey though, I just I can't. The

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Speaker 1: black eyed peas just don't do it for me.

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Speaker 4: Well, I mean, you got half of the prosperity, right.

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Speaker 1: Well, I'm just I'm claiming it. I'm just go claim

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Speaker 1: it without the black eyed peas. I had to fight

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Speaker 1: out a bill in my pocket, not a die. I

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Speaker 1: covered it a little.

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Speaker 2: Bit, big money right there, big money period.

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Speaker 4: But listen, it was.

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Speaker 3: A great new year for New Year's Eve, and looking

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Speaker 3: forward to.

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Speaker 2: Five has to bring absolutely and so it's because of

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Speaker 2: that that, in keeping with the theme and trend of

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Speaker 2: a new year that we kind of briefly touched on

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Speaker 2: this last episode and even the episode before that, it

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Speaker 2: is traditionally a time of year when people set new

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Speaker 2: goals for themselves. They do resolutions, which is great.

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Speaker 4: Me.

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Speaker 2: I'm one who may have a bunch of stuff in

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Speaker 2: mind and by February first out of forgot half of

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Speaker 2: it because say whatever, say. But I also realize as

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Speaker 2: I get older that goal setting and resolutions it's not bad.

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Speaker 3: The problem is we don't do them right.

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Speaker 2: Like we we confuse setting goal and by we I

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Speaker 2: mean women. Yeah, we confuse that sometimes with have to's,

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Speaker 2: and we start to put all this extra pressure on

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Speaker 2: ourselves to do stuff that we really don't have to do.

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Speaker 2: And so now now these things that we should want

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Speaker 2: to do feel more like jobs, feel more like if

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Speaker 2: we don't make a certain thing happen by a certain

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Speaker 2: day at a certain time.

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Speaker 4: And when you really break.

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Speaker 2: It down, we've been doing this shit our whole life,

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Speaker 2: like we have been conditioned to do this shit our

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Speaker 2: whole entire lives.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we as women, We as women, and so no doubt,

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Speaker 1: it just feels like today is a good day for

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Speaker 1: us to set the record straight with ourselves and for

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Speaker 1: us to just tell all of our freedoms, fans.

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Speaker 4: And each other cut that shit out.

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Speaker 2: We don't have to put that kind of pressure on ourselves.

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Speaker 2: So today's episode is going to be focused on goal

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Speaker 2: setting and relieving the pressure. So let's go ahead and

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Speaker 2: take it to the next level.

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Speaker 3: So this might be.

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Speaker 4: Maybe a dumb question considering that you were an.

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Speaker 2: Athlete and questions obviously being that we all assume that

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Speaker 2: you put at the table this is what I gotta do.

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Speaker 2: And I think one of those things for an athlete is,

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Speaker 2: obviously when you play it in the professional league, your

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Speaker 2: goal is to win a championship every year.

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Speaker 4: That's the goal. Win a championship every year. That's it.

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Speaker 4: That's it, that's it, which y'all did for the first floor.

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Speaker 2: I mean shit, but I'm curious to know if there

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Speaker 2: was ever an instance in which you wanted to accomplish

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Speaker 2: something so much that you put so much pressure on

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Speaker 2: yourself to get this thing done and whatever that was,

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Speaker 2: did you or did you not do it?

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Speaker 3: So we talked before we started recording you and I and.

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Speaker 1: I just said this conversation today is one that even

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Speaker 1: I didn't realize I needed, but I do. So I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna tell you now because you always coming at me

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Speaker 1: for shedding tears, but I'm.

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Speaker 3: Probably gonna shed a few today because I.

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Speaker 1: Like, right now where I am in my life, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: what goals am I really trying.

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Speaker 3: To achieve right now?

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Speaker 1: And by that I mean for me, not what everybody

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Speaker 1: else is telling me I should do or thinks I

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Speaker 1: should be doing right now. So I'm in a space

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Speaker 1: t Honestly, I'm gonna be very vulnerable with you today, Kay.

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Speaker 1: Of course, I'm in a space right now where, honestly

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Speaker 1: I'm like, what the fuck, Like, where am I going?

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Speaker 3: Where am I headed? What's next for me?

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Speaker 1: And some people may say, well, you're fifty three, so

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Speaker 1: y'ear old, right, And I'm like, I don't feel old,

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Speaker 1: but I feel like I'm at a point in my

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Speaker 1: life though, where.

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Speaker 3: I'm not really sure.

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Speaker 1: What's next for me, and I don't know if that's

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Speaker 1: good or if it's bad.

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Speaker 3: But to answer your question, I put a.

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Speaker 1: Whole lot of pressure on myself when I was playing

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Speaker 1: and when I was pregnant, and that pressure wasn't just

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Speaker 1: to come back and be great and play basketball and

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Speaker 1: do the things that people saw me do or knew

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Speaker 1: me for as far as a basketball player, I put

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Speaker 1: pressure on myself to be the best mom and athlete

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Speaker 1: I could be because it hadn't really been done, at

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Speaker 1: least in women's basketball, and there was no one that

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Speaker 1: I could look at and say, oh, this is how

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Speaker 1: she did it. So for me being like the first

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Speaker 1: one to walk that path, but there were times where

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Speaker 1: I was like, shit, am I doing this right? Should

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Speaker 1: I stop doing all the things to be a great

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Speaker 1: basketball player and focus more on being a great mom.

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Speaker 1: There was a lot of guilt that came with that.

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Speaker 1: There was a lot of pressure I put on myself.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, like I don't have all the shit

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Speaker 1: figured out.

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Speaker 3: I still don't. I did that and I still don't.

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Speaker 1: But I do think we as women put that type

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Speaker 1: of pressure on ourselves when we're trying to figure out,

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Speaker 1: like our goals and what do we want to achieve

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Speaker 1: and what do we want to accomplish. Last thing, I'll say,

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Speaker 1: I took your advice our last episode.

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Speaker 3: I think we talked about a vision board.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and so for me, that vision board has really

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Speaker 1: put things into better perspective for me than actually just

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Speaker 1: writing down goals.

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Speaker 4: If that makes yes, it does.

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Speaker 2: It makes tons of sense, And you really hit on

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Speaker 2: so many different things because I had.

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Speaker 3: Already next out because it's gonna be one.

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Speaker 2: It's gonna be one of them episodes. And that's cool,

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Speaker 2: Like I love that. I love that about us, that

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Speaker 2: we can be vulnerable and really just be honest about

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Speaker 2: where we are and what we're doing. And I always

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Speaker 2: do a lot of I'm a documentary nerdive research person.

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Speaker 4: That's just my thing.

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Speaker 2: And even before I thought that this would be a

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Speaker 2: great episode for us to do, I was already looking

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Speaker 2: and following this woman named Stacy Kim and she's a psychologist,

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Speaker 2: and so she was talking about some tips and some

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Speaker 2: things that we do as women as it relates the

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Speaker 2: goal setting that we could do better. And so one

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Speaker 2: of the things, and I really want to talk about

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Speaker 2: some of these things that she listed, but one of

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Speaker 2: the things that she did was she gave us some numbers.

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Speaker 2: And I looked at these numbers and I was like, boy,

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Speaker 2: when I think about the shit that I did at

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Speaker 2: this age, this is what our problem is. So you're

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Speaker 2: talking about being a mom. We have been conditioned to

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Speaker 2: think that as women, we gotta do shit when other

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Speaker 2: people think we need to do them. So depending on

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Speaker 2: your cultural background, or your family background or wherever, you are.

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Speaker 2: My mother was fifteen when she had me, sixteen when

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Speaker 2: she had my brother, nineteen when she had my younger sister,

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Speaker 2: and it just kept going and go. By twenty years old, woman,

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Speaker 2: you had three children, But you're looking at me at

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Speaker 2: the age of twenty three and saying, oh my god, Arrika,

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Speaker 2: when do you plan on having kids?

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Speaker 4: Ma'am, I'm twenty three.

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Speaker 3: Allow me to live, Allow me.

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Speaker 4: To figure it out that in mind.

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Speaker 2: I looked at the average age of parenthood in twenty

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Speaker 2: twenty four, and according to the statistics, in twenty twenty four,

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Speaker 2: the average woman having her first child is twenty eight

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Speaker 2: years old. Then I continue to dig a little bit more,

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Speaker 2: and I said, how old are people getting married now?

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Speaker 2: Because that's another thing women get pressured to do. If

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Speaker 2: you ain't married by such and such age, you might

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Speaker 2: as well be a spinster out here.

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Speaker 4: Industry. Okay, let's look.

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Speaker 2: I did some more digging, and I see that the

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Speaker 2: average age of women getting married in twenty twenty four

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Speaker 2: is twenty eight years old, which is up from twenty

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Speaker 2: years old in the nineteen fifties. So as I'm starting

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Speaker 2: to look at these numbers, I'm looking at careers because

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Speaker 2: what's another thing. Oh my god, I'm thirty. I don't

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Speaker 2: have a career yet. I'm going through a midlife crisis.

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Speaker 4: Look at the numbers.

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Speaker 2: The average age of people actually settling into the careers

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Speaker 2: are between the ages of thirty five and forty one.

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Speaker 2: So it's okay to be young and not have it

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Speaker 2: figured out.

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Speaker 4: So what does this make me think?

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Speaker 2: Cheryl is like we spend too much time trying to

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Speaker 2: set goals based on what we think other people think

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Speaker 2: we should be doing, and not really paying attention to

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Speaker 2: what we should be doing. It's difficult when you think about,

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Speaker 2: like how do I set goals.

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Speaker 4: For me or how do I do shit for me?

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Speaker 2: When all I've been taught this whole time is what

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Speaker 2: everybody else think I'm supposed to be doing by a

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Speaker 2: certain time, by a certain age, when I get to

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Speaker 2: a certain place.

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Speaker 3: Like damn, what the fuck let me breathe?

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Speaker 4: Twenty twenty five got to be a year we breathed?

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Speaker 3: Is you said it?

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Speaker 1: I think depending on like your cultural background and your

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Speaker 1: upbringing and the way you were raised, that puts a

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Speaker 1: lot of things into perspective, right, I said on the

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Speaker 1: last episode and talked about my son getting ready to

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Speaker 1: have a kid. He's twenty seven, so I'm not tripping

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Speaker 1: on the age.

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Speaker 3: But she's twenty three, so I am tripping on the age. Right.

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Speaker 1: So when you brought that up, I was just like wow,

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Speaker 1: because that was my first thought was you haven't lived.

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Speaker 1: Y'all haven't lived. And when you get ready to bring

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Speaker 1: a child into this world, I don't care what age

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Speaker 1: you are.

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Speaker 3: Shit changes. You go from.

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Speaker 1: Being first to last, yep, when a child comes into

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Speaker 1: the picture. But the thing that I really want us

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Speaker 1: as women, and not just Black women, women in general, Like,

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Speaker 1: I really want us to take charge of who we

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Speaker 1: are and being who we are the way we want

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Speaker 1: to be that yep, right, not the way society says

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Speaker 1: we should be, Not the way your parents say you

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Speaker 1: should be.

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Speaker 3: Like, we've got to get to a point to where

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Speaker 3: we're okay with it.

401
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Speaker 1: If I choose not to get married until I'm fifty

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Speaker 1: years old, damn it, that's my choice.

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Speaker 4: That's your choice.

404
00:19:02,680 --> 00:19:07,119
Speaker 1: Yes, maybe I haven't found the right person, And who

405
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Speaker 1: are you to tell me that I have to be

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Speaker 1: married by a certain age or else. The other thing

407
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Speaker 1: is you talk about the age where women have kids.

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Speaker 1: Maybe some women don't want to have kids, and that's

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Speaker 1: okay too.

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Speaker 3: Yep, it's okay to be childless cat ladies right right.

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Speaker 3: I know I'm not gonna go there. I'm not gonna

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Speaker 3: go there.

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Speaker 1: But there's so much pressure that's put on us from society,

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Speaker 1: from even friends, right that says, here's who we have

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Speaker 1: to be, the way we have to be when we

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Speaker 1: have to be it, And no we don't, We.

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Speaker 2: Truly don't at all. And it's okay to be the

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Speaker 2: first to set a different trend in your family. For

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Speaker 2: everybody else in your family getting married at twenty two

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Speaker 2: to twenty three, maybe it's okay to wait till you

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Speaker 2: thirty five. You ain't got to follow the tradition. That's

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Speaker 2: how you break the cycle. It's okay to one absolutely

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Speaker 2: make the cycle. And so when I said earlier that

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Speaker 2: the reason why sometimes we don't meet our goals is

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Speaker 2: because we go sett and wrong. We go setting wrong,

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Speaker 2: We setting goals for the wrong thing. We look in

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Speaker 2: other people.

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Speaker 1: We're setting the setting goal people our lives, yeah, other people.

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Speaker 2: And based on other people's ideas or what we're supposed

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Speaker 2: to do or how we're supposed to act. We got

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Speaker 2: to cut that out So some of the things that

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Speaker 2: Stacy says that I truly love is one, pick one

433
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Speaker 2: goal to focus on, and then two, let that goal

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Speaker 2: be a want rather than I have to or I should,

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Speaker 2: And I love that that right that we can definitely

436
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Speaker 2: walk in chew gum at the same time. So that

437
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Speaker 2: doesn't necessarily mean we're incapable of having more than one goal,

438
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Speaker 2: but at the same time, the one that you focus on,

439
00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:53,760
Speaker 2: let that be your one, and then do smaller tasks

440
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Speaker 2: to get to that one goal. So you got long

441
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Speaker 2: term and short term, which makes sense. For example, my

442
00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:02,199
Speaker 2: goal was to buy a house. Little things I had

443
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Speaker 2: to do to make sure that I could do that,

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Speaker 2: save my money, pay down my debt, find a realtor,

445
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Speaker 2: cut back on shopping. But the ultimate goal was to

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Speaker 2: do this thing right. One of the things that stood

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Speaker 2: out to me she has seven of them. So one

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Speaker 2: was pick a goal and focus on it. Two would

449
00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:20,080
Speaker 2: start with want to rather than I have to or

450
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:23,920
Speaker 2: I should. But this one was interesting to me. Focus

451
00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:28,560
Speaker 2: on yourself. You can't change the behaviors of other people,

452
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:32,000
Speaker 2: and you can't make people see you and what you

453
00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:33,120
Speaker 2: want to do the way that.

454
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:34,840
Speaker 4: You want them to see you.

455
00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:36,600
Speaker 2: You just got to let them do what they're doing

456
00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:38,639
Speaker 2: and be what they be in and feel how they feel.

457
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:41,080
Speaker 4: You focus on yourself.

458
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:44,639
Speaker 2: Mind your own damn biausness, And so I think that

459
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:47,760
Speaker 2: is such an important I'm telling you, like, the only

460
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:49,320
Speaker 2: thing you can do is such your goals for you,

461
00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:51,320
Speaker 2: and if people ain't rocking with you, they ain't rocking

462
00:21:51,359 --> 00:21:54,320
Speaker 2: with you. Right. Number four she had which I just

463
00:21:54,359 --> 00:21:57,240
Speaker 2: touched on and recognized the difference between projects and tasks.

464
00:21:57,600 --> 00:22:00,280
Speaker 2: So big goal and then little things you need to

465
00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:03,879
Speaker 2: do to get big goal. And then five, which I

466
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:07,000
Speaker 2: really love too, was set a check in point right,

467
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:10,440
Speaker 2: hold yourself accountable, put a deadline on it.

468
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:11,919
Speaker 4: After a couple of weeks.

469
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:15,879
Speaker 2: Number six, what I've been saying twenty twenty five is

470
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:19,199
Speaker 2: celebrate your sixccess.

471
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:20,920
Speaker 4: Celebrate it right.

472
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,720
Speaker 2: Instead of saying, oh, you know, I wanted to lose

473
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,000
Speaker 2: fifty pounds, I only lost twenty five.

474
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:28,320
Speaker 4: Since you lost twenty.

475
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:32,840
Speaker 1: Five pounds, celebrated, celebrated, celebrate that shit.

476
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:37,320
Speaker 2: But this to me was the most important one of all.

477
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:42,600
Speaker 2: Be flexible, abandon goals that don't serve you well.

478
00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:45,840
Speaker 4: It's a lot of shit that looked dope in January.

479
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:49,040
Speaker 2: I like that, and by the time you get to April,

480
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:52,399
Speaker 2: you like, Yo, this really ain't it. That's part of

481
00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:55,240
Speaker 2: the focus on yourself. If something that you said you

482
00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:58,240
Speaker 2: want to do in January ain't really working out by April,

483
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:01,200
Speaker 2: you ain't feeling it. It's not making you happy, it's

484
00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:04,000
Speaker 2: not serving your purpose. Don't be trying to do it

485
00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:05,199
Speaker 2: just for the sake of doing it.

486
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:09,320
Speaker 1: Let that shit go just to have a conversation or

487
00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:11,400
Speaker 1: for it to be a good look. And that's why

488
00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:14,239
Speaker 1: t I think I got away from making my New

489
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:18,600
Speaker 1: Year's resolutions because every year I was Okay, i'm gonna

490
00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:20,680
Speaker 1: work out, I'm gonna lose x amount of pounds, I'm

491
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:23,320
Speaker 1: gonna do this, And I did it for the first month,

492
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:27,359
Speaker 1: but then through traveling and just life right, I was

493
00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:31,000
Speaker 1: just like, shit, no, I'm done with that.

494
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:32,480
Speaker 3: But I also think.

495
00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:36,680
Speaker 1: We put so much pressure on ourselves when we kind

496
00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:40,080
Speaker 1: of see what other people are doing. Your journey's different

497
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:43,680
Speaker 1: from mine, and maybe what you're doing is working for you.

498
00:23:44,119 --> 00:23:49,440
Speaker 1: That doesn't mean that what I'm doing is wrong. Because

499
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:53,080
Speaker 1: back to what number was it three three on yourself?

500
00:23:53,480 --> 00:23:56,439
Speaker 1: Focus on yourself, and that is what I think we

501
00:23:56,800 --> 00:24:02,160
Speaker 1: as women really need to dive into and really focus

502
00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:05,680
Speaker 1: on is just focusing on ourselves. I don't know whoever

503
00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:08,840
Speaker 1: said in life that when you get to a certain

504
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:11,160
Speaker 1: age that you have your life figured out, because again,

505
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:14,160
Speaker 1: I'm fifty three and I don't have it figured out.

506
00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:15,960
Speaker 4: No, of course not.

507
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:19,000
Speaker 2: And what's interesting is we use the term midlife crisis

508
00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:20,879
Speaker 2: all the time. So I did a little bit of

509
00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:25,760
Speaker 2: digging on that too, and apparently the actual range of

510
00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:30,280
Speaker 2: midlife crisis happens between forty five and sixty. So I'm

511
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:32,840
Speaker 2: sorry if you're listening and you're thirty and you think

512
00:24:32,840 --> 00:24:35,200
Speaker 2: you're going through a midlife crisis because you then graduated

513
00:24:35,200 --> 00:24:38,560
Speaker 2: from school with your degree and unfortunately you haven't found

514
00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,959
Speaker 2: a job of your career yet and now you're in

515
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:42,119
Speaker 2: a one bedroom or.

516
00:24:42,119 --> 00:24:43,120
Speaker 4: A studio apartment.

517
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:45,680
Speaker 2: In life is coming to an end unless you plan

518
00:24:45,720 --> 00:24:48,359
Speaker 2: on kicking the bucket naturally at sixty, sweetheart, you are

519
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:49,560
Speaker 2: not in a midlife crisis.

520
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:52,160
Speaker 4: You are doing an average twenty nine thirty year old

521
00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:54,800
Speaker 4: person has to go through. It is great, it is.

522
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:59,800
Speaker 2: Sorry, but usually it is said that midlife crisises usually

523
00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:04,560
Speaker 2: have happened between forty five and sixty after a significant

524
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:08,639
Speaker 2: life change like a divorce, a retirement, a death of

525
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:14,920
Speaker 2: a loved one, aging, something where you significantly shift because

526
00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:19,160
Speaker 2: you think you don't know your purpose. And I thought

527
00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:23,400
Speaker 2: that was interesting because I could totally understand someone who

528
00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:27,639
Speaker 2: had been a director for thirty years and at the

529
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:30,800
Speaker 2: age of fifty five, they're no longer a director and

530
00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:33,399
Speaker 2: they've decided to retire, and now they're like, now, what

531
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:35,159
Speaker 2: what is my purpose now? Like?

532
00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:36,600
Speaker 4: How do I make an impact?

533
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:39,680
Speaker 2: It sounded good to retire, it sounded good to not work,

534
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:43,480
Speaker 2: but like, now, what's my goal? What's my thing? I

535
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:47,919
Speaker 2: could see that more than just I didn't make or

536
00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:52,399
Speaker 2: reach the societal norm that folks put upon me. And

537
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:54,320
Speaker 2: because I didn't make it, I didn't reach it. I

538
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:57,640
Speaker 2: didn't do that thing. Life is falling apart. Those are

539
00:25:57,680 --> 00:26:01,239
Speaker 2: not the same. And the thing about that is I

540
00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:04,520
Speaker 2: have to ask myself sometimes when I be going through this.

541
00:26:04,800 --> 00:26:06,240
Speaker 3: Do men have to go through that shit?

542
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:11,800
Speaker 2: Because while men have their own set of pressures, it

543
00:26:11,880 --> 00:26:14,760
Speaker 2: is very different than the set of societal pressures that

544
00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:18,159
Speaker 2: women have. You talked about the pressure that you felt

545
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:21,480
Speaker 2: having to be an athlete and be a good mom.

546
00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:24,160
Speaker 2: Do you know how many daddy's in the NBA ain't

547
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:29,240
Speaker 2: thought a damn sure thing about missing a birthday, missing

548
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:32,600
Speaker 2: a Christmas, not being able. I'm sure they would love

549
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:34,919
Speaker 2: to be there, but I don't see not a single

550
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:38,280
Speaker 2: column being written or any of the think pieces coming

551
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:41,720
Speaker 2: out about how they are terrible fathers because they have

552
00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:44,560
Speaker 2: to be in the NBA from October to June.

553
00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:45,200
Speaker 4: I don't know.

554
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:47,640
Speaker 1: What it says is that they have to do their job.

555
00:26:47,920 --> 00:26:50,000
Speaker 1: They have to provide for their family.

556
00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:53,200
Speaker 3: That's their job is to be a professional athlete. That's

557
00:26:53,240 --> 00:26:56,600
Speaker 3: your job, right, But uctually they can't be there.

558
00:26:56,680 --> 00:27:00,040
Speaker 2: And spouses are expected to understand. Listen, that was the

559
00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:02,480
Speaker 2: person that you got with. When you got with them,

560
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:07,440
Speaker 2: those pressures don't apply to men, So why the hell

561
00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:09,960
Speaker 2: do we keep letting those type of pressures rule and

562
00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:13,560
Speaker 2: feed our lives. The numbers are showing women are starting

563
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:15,480
Speaker 2: to wise up a little bit and be like, I

564
00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:16,720
Speaker 2: ain't got a rush to do this.

565
00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:19,359
Speaker 1: Shit, because here's what happens a lot of times. Let's

566
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:21,200
Speaker 1: just go back to the whole marriage thing.

567
00:27:21,680 --> 00:27:23,400
Speaker 3: Lots of times when you.

568
00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:28,639
Speaker 1: Think you found the right one, and yes, it happens,

569
00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:32,480
Speaker 1: it works, But just say, I'm gonna use my son

570
00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:34,840
Speaker 1: and his girlfriend for an example, Right, my son is

571
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 1: twenty seven, she's twenty three.

572
00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:40,399
Speaker 3: Have they had a discussion about marriage? I don't know.

573
00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:44,040
Speaker 4: Not with me. That ain't yours, mama.

574
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:45,840
Speaker 3: That ain't my business. That ain't my business.

575
00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:50,000
Speaker 1: But so many times because of what society says, right,

576
00:27:50,520 --> 00:27:53,119
Speaker 1: you should be married before you have a child. And

577
00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:55,880
Speaker 1: I also know in the black culture, I know Bahama

578
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:57,679
Speaker 1: was like, oh no, you're not about to lay up

579
00:27:57,680 --> 00:27:58,840
Speaker 1: with nobody and have a baby.

580
00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 3: You better get married hers all those things. But to me,

581
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:02,840
Speaker 3: at the age.

582
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 1: Of twenty three and twenty seven, I don't think you've lived.

583
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:13,119
Speaker 3: Also, do you really truly know what love is?

584
00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:16,480
Speaker 1: It's a question I'm asking. I don't know, but to

585
00:28:16,560 --> 00:28:19,120
Speaker 1: say this is the person I want to marry. The

586
00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:21,280
Speaker 1: only reason why I bring that up is because I

587
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:23,720
Speaker 1: went through a divorce. I got married when I was

588
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:27,200
Speaker 1: really young, right, and I went through a divorce. Not

589
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:30,560
Speaker 1: saying divorces don't happen to older couples, because they happen

590
00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:35,719
Speaker 1: all the time, but I would like to think that

591
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:38,880
Speaker 1: the younger you get married, if you don't really truly

592
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:43,720
Speaker 1: know each other, that's going to lead to a divorce

593
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:48,480
Speaker 1: quicker than someone who's older. My husband and I we

594
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 1: were engaged for ten years. I remember you saying that, yeah,

595
00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:57,560
Speaker 1: and I just again, I go back to the stats

596
00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:01,160
Speaker 1: you brought up, and we just have to get out

597
00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:06,160
Speaker 1: of the old ways, in the old mindset of this

598
00:29:06,240 --> 00:29:09,240
Speaker 1: is who I have to be and what I should

599
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:13,040
Speaker 1: have accomplished by the time I get a certain.

600
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:15,840
Speaker 2: Age have to And when we come back on the

601
00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:19,200
Speaker 2: other side, I want to share a couple of things

602
00:29:19,320 --> 00:29:23,680
Speaker 2: that my girl has really laid out here that we

603
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:25,840
Speaker 2: can do to help us get back on track when

604
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:28,120
Speaker 2: we feel like we've slipped on our goals a little bit,

605
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 2: but also maybe how we can help each other to

606
00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:35,480
Speaker 2: stay out of that mindset of doing what society thinks

607
00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:37,880
Speaker 2: we should do instead of just doing what we like

608
00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 2: to do.

609
00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 4: So we'll be right back after this.

610
00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:51,960
Speaker 2: Cheryl, Can I ask you if there is one I

611
00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:56,720
Speaker 2: guess you can say societal norm about women that people

612
00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 2: say about us or place on us, or a pressure

613
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,680
Speaker 2: that they put on us that you just if I

614
00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:04,560
Speaker 2: had an all time, I.

615
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:07,280
Speaker 4: Really hate that they say this about us. This is

616
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:07,840
Speaker 4: that thing.

617
00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:10,240
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you put me on the spot there because

618
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:14,080
Speaker 1: I can. Okay, let me hear your two first.

619
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:17,240
Speaker 4: Okay, the first one that I have is about all women.

620
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:22,000
Speaker 2: I hate that people think women are soft, like women

621
00:30:22,080 --> 00:30:25,200
Speaker 2: are soft, Like we're supposed to be soft. So to

622
00:30:25,280 --> 00:30:27,400
Speaker 2: make that an insult is like, what the fuck does

623
00:30:27,440 --> 00:30:30,600
Speaker 2: that mean? We're supposed to be soft? Yeah, but I

624
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:33,480
Speaker 2: don't mean like cute, cuddly sauce. I mean like the

625
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:38,160
Speaker 2: we can't handle trials challenges, because what you mean or

626
00:30:38,280 --> 00:30:40,360
Speaker 2: if you're talking to a man and you'd be like, oh,

627
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:41,280
Speaker 2: you putting up a girl?

628
00:30:41,360 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 4: Like what the fuck that means?

629
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:43,040
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying?

630
00:30:43,040 --> 00:30:45,880
Speaker 4: I hate that. Yeah, And it's like one A and

631
00:30:46,000 --> 00:30:46,280
Speaker 4: one B.

632
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:49,040
Speaker 2: That leads me to number two, which is more for

633
00:30:49,120 --> 00:30:52,960
Speaker 2: black women, and that is that we're aggressive. Don't call

634
00:30:53,040 --> 00:30:55,920
Speaker 2: me aggressive because I don't take your bullshit because I

635
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 2: stand up for myself. Because I'm assertive because I learned

636
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:00,880
Speaker 2: how to use the English lane which correctly, and I

637
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:04,480
Speaker 2: use it for my benefit when necessary. That means I'm

638
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:06,760
Speaker 2: aggressive and I'm angry.

639
00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:09,160
Speaker 4: I don't like that. Those are my two.

640
00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:13,880
Speaker 2: I hate that society has those stereotypes around us.

641
00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:15,680
Speaker 1: I mean those are two good ones, because I would

642
00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:17,840
Speaker 1: definitely agree with you on that. I think one for

643
00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:22,640
Speaker 1: me is I just hate when men say, oh, she's

644
00:31:22,640 --> 00:31:26,080
Speaker 1: a woman, Like, I hate that because I'm like, what

645
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:26,760
Speaker 1: does that mean?

646
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:27,680
Speaker 2: Yes?

647
00:31:27,800 --> 00:31:29,880
Speaker 3: I am a woman, I'm gonna forever be a woman.

648
00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:31,520
Speaker 3: What is your point? Because there are.

649
00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:33,880
Speaker 1: Times where my husband and I are having a conversation

650
00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:37,239
Speaker 1: and sometimes he'll say, well, she's a woman, and I'm like,

651
00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:40,360
Speaker 1: what the fuck does that mean? Right? I am too,

652
00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 1: So if you feel that way about her and she's

653
00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:44,800
Speaker 1: a woman, then you feel that way about me.

654
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:47,840
Speaker 3: And I think the other one for.

655
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:50,880
Speaker 1: Me, tea would be And this is gonna take me

656
00:31:50,960 --> 00:31:57,680
Speaker 1: back to the election where we society doesn't feel like

657
00:31:57,800 --> 00:32:01,880
Speaker 1: a woman is capable of running a country.

658
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:03,360
Speaker 3: Because there are a lot.

659
00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:06,800
Speaker 1: Of different reasons why Kama didn't win, but one that

660
00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:10,280
Speaker 1: I heard was, oh, my goodness, I would never vote

661
00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:11,600
Speaker 1: for a woman to lead.

662
00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:15,680
Speaker 3: Us to run this country. And that bothers the shit

663
00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:16,160
Speaker 3: out of me.

664
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:20,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I know for a fact there are women

665
00:32:20,720 --> 00:32:25,520
Speaker 1: out there in this world that are way better at.

666
00:32:25,480 --> 00:32:26,720
Speaker 3: Running shit than men are.

667
00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:27,440
Speaker 4: Yep.

668
00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:32,160
Speaker 1: But that's where we as women have to stand up

669
00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:35,200
Speaker 1: and hold our ground and say, listen, I am a woman,

670
00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:37,640
Speaker 1: proud to be one, but let me tell you why

671
00:32:37,680 --> 00:32:39,080
Speaker 1: I can do this job better than you.

672
00:32:39,760 --> 00:32:41,760
Speaker 3: Matter of fact, let me show you why I.

673
00:32:41,760 --> 00:32:43,560
Speaker 1: Can do this job better than you, not just tell

674
00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:45,000
Speaker 1: you my mom. You say I can show you better

675
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:45,760
Speaker 1: than I can tell you.

676
00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:49,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, that reminds me of I forgot what podcasts I

677
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:52,600
Speaker 2: was listening to, but someone had mentioned that women get

678
00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:55,000
Speaker 2: jobs based on their track record. They have to prove

679
00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:57,960
Speaker 2: that they can do it, whereas men get a job

680
00:32:58,080 --> 00:32:59,080
Speaker 2: or get an opportunity.

681
00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:01,760
Speaker 4: Because I could see the potential in.

682
00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:03,920
Speaker 2: Here, I could see how much I could see you

683
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,160
Speaker 2: look like the kind of guy who is going You're

684
00:33:06,240 --> 00:33:10,959
Speaker 2: going places, even in relationships, right, even in relationships, you

685
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:13,120
Speaker 2: look at a woman and you be like, I want

686
00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:14,960
Speaker 2: to get with that woman because that woman got it

687
00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:15,400
Speaker 2: going on.

688
00:33:15,480 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 4: She's got a great job, she's got a college education.

689
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,200
Speaker 1: You look at a man and you be like, yeah,

690
00:33:20,280 --> 00:33:22,800
Speaker 1: I know he only got a ged DA, he working

691
00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:26,760
Speaker 1: at McDonald's right now, but guess what, I could see

692
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:30,640
Speaker 1: him going places. And then it's twenty years later and

693
00:33:30,680 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 1: you are here calling this man a bum, but you

694
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:35,520
Speaker 1: saw him going place a twenty years ain't not wrong

695
00:33:35,600 --> 00:33:38,120
Speaker 1: with having a ged A or working at McDonald's.

696
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:40,080
Speaker 4: So I wasn't trying to play anybody out of it

697
00:33:40,080 --> 00:33:41,720
Speaker 4: off places. Ain't nothing wrong with that.

698
00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:44,760
Speaker 2: I'm just saying, be accepting of what you got in

699
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 2: front of you and talking about potential. But I bring

700
00:33:48,320 --> 00:33:52,920
Speaker 2: all that up because Stacey continues to talk about sometimes

701
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:56,400
Speaker 2: women we set goals based on what we think is

702
00:33:56,440 --> 00:34:02,440
Speaker 2: achievable for us because people have already decided what's achievable

703
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:05,720
Speaker 2: for women and what's not. Example, being president of the

704
00:34:05,840 --> 00:34:10,320
Speaker 2: United States. It has already been proven in other countries

705
00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:14,560
Speaker 2: that women can absolutely be world leaders, but for whatever reason,

706
00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:18,320
Speaker 2: in the United States, there is still this societal norm

707
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:21,480
Speaker 2: that women can't be president because we've seen three women

708
00:34:21,600 --> 00:34:25,760
Speaker 2: try four technically, Shirley CHISHLM didn't make it, Hillary Clinton

709
00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:26,799
Speaker 2: didn't make it.

710
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:29,279
Speaker 4: Kamala Harris didn't make it.

711
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:32,239
Speaker 2: So some of the things that I love that she

712
00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:36,080
Speaker 2: says is that there are some really counterintuitive ways to

713
00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:38,680
Speaker 2: just get people out of your brink. You touched on

714
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:40,520
Speaker 2: one of them. One of the things she says is

715
00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:43,560
Speaker 2: keeping it to yourself right. Sometimes you want to tell

716
00:34:43,560 --> 00:34:45,600
Speaker 2: people what it is that you want to do, and

717
00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:48,239
Speaker 2: you get those people around you who just aren't supportive.

718
00:34:48,560 --> 00:34:50,759
Speaker 2: Even esther, when she was like I was asking people,

719
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:53,200
Speaker 2: should I quit my job? And they were all like, girl, no,

720
00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:57,319
Speaker 2: you crazy. If every single time you want to do

721
00:34:57,360 --> 00:35:01,160
Speaker 2: something and somebody is there behind you to try to

722
00:35:01,239 --> 00:35:04,440
Speaker 2: tell you don't do it, you know what, you need

723
00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:08,040
Speaker 2: to preserve your energy and sometimes it's just best to

724
00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:09,400
Speaker 2: keep that shit to yourself.

725
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:12,279
Speaker 3: No, you know what, Like it's cool.

726
00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:13,400
Speaker 4: I don't really need to tell you.

727
00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:16,319
Speaker 2: That. Don't mean I'm not gonna try and do this thing.

728
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:19,840
Speaker 2: I'm just not gonna have these people bringing this negative

729
00:35:19,920 --> 00:35:20,799
Speaker 2: energy around me.

730
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:23,200
Speaker 3: And that is huge, right.

731
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:25,799
Speaker 1: If you have your little circle and I don't even

732
00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:27,520
Speaker 1: have a circle, they got mna have an art.

733
00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:28,960
Speaker 3: You gotta have moved.

734
00:35:29,320 --> 00:35:33,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you gotta be careful with the people you

735
00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:37,520
Speaker 1: bring in that circle because lots of times those are

736
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:39,959
Speaker 1: the people that will drag you down and bring you down.

737
00:35:40,040 --> 00:35:41,640
Speaker 3: Because let's just keep it real.

738
00:35:43,280 --> 00:35:46,440
Speaker 1: We talk about men not supporting us and having our

739
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:50,359
Speaker 1: backs and all that, but Tea, as women, sometimes we

740
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:53,920
Speaker 1: are our worst enemies. Say that shit again instead of

741
00:35:53,960 --> 00:35:57,280
Speaker 1: supporting each other, Tea, I don't want to see you succeed.

742
00:35:57,320 --> 00:35:59,240
Speaker 1: I'm gonna sit here and laugh with you right now

743
00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:01,840
Speaker 1: in your face, sit and encourage you and say yes, girl.

744
00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:04,680
Speaker 1: But as soon as I get at the door, let

745
00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:06,759
Speaker 1: me get on my phone, let me go tell these

746
00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:09,560
Speaker 1: people this crazy Shitterterrika talking over here.

747
00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:11,880
Speaker 3: Girl, No she ain't about to do X Y and

748
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 3: Z y'all. I'm gonna be here with her. Let her

749
00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:15,160
Speaker 3: think she.

750
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:18,160
Speaker 2: Can't or this one right here that sometimes we do,

751
00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:21,240
Speaker 2: and we're gonna talk about accountability. We gotta have accountability

752
00:36:21,239 --> 00:36:23,799
Speaker 2: for the shit that we do. Sometimes, not me and

753
00:36:23,960 --> 00:36:27,919
Speaker 2: Ryl personally, because we ain't fake like this, but it's

754
00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:31,680
Speaker 2: people who will hear your dream and hear your idea

755
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:34,360
Speaker 2: and hear what you trying to do. And then the

756
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,520
Speaker 2: next thing you know, they out here pursuing and doing

757
00:36:37,560 --> 00:36:39,759
Speaker 2: the same shit. And you say it on my time,

758
00:36:40,080 --> 00:36:43,600
Speaker 2: saying one my time, you had one more time, I

759
00:36:43,760 --> 00:36:45,600
Speaker 2: told you that I was about to get ready to

760
00:36:45,640 --> 00:36:48,400
Speaker 2: go jump on this opportunity. And the next thing I know,

761
00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:50,560
Speaker 2: you in the room trying to get on the opportunity

762
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:51,040
Speaker 2: before me.

763
00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:53,759
Speaker 3: What type of shit is that and acting like it

764
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:54,560
Speaker 3: was your idea.

765
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 2: Now they're trying to gas like you, like you're crazy,

766
00:36:57,440 --> 00:36:58,319
Speaker 2: like you're making it up.

767
00:36:58,560 --> 00:36:59,719
Speaker 3: As sad as that is.

768
00:37:00,160 --> 00:37:03,800
Speaker 1: You gotta be very careful back to Stacey's points, Sometimes

769
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:08,040
Speaker 1: you gotta keep shit to yourself because not everybody is

770
00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 1: on your team.

771
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:10,080
Speaker 4: Sys that's facts.

772
00:37:10,320 --> 00:37:12,400
Speaker 2: Second thing she says when you gotta get back on

773
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:15,480
Speaker 2: track with your goal is sometimes it's cool to double

774
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:18,520
Speaker 2: down on doing nothing because a lot of times people

775
00:37:18,520 --> 00:37:21,560
Speaker 2: are making seem like, you know what, Oh, all she

776
00:37:21,680 --> 00:37:24,080
Speaker 2: was doing was over there standing in the corner, or

777
00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:27,680
Speaker 2: all she says she was doing was praying. You did right,

778
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:31,080
Speaker 2: I said, I was praying. Like that's a doing nothing.

779
00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:36,280
Speaker 2: That's doing something. Meditation is something that's doing nothing. Maybe

780
00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:38,640
Speaker 2: I do need to go and take this walk around

781
00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:40,919
Speaker 2: the corner to get my mind and clear my mind.

782
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:43,440
Speaker 4: Maybe I do need to spend an extra ten minutes

783
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:45,680
Speaker 4: in the shower because I need peace.

784
00:37:46,200 --> 00:37:49,400
Speaker 2: It is okay for me to be making my moves

785
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 2: my way and you not fully see or understand why

786
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:57,319
Speaker 2: I'm moving the way that I'm moving. And I'm one

787
00:37:57,360 --> 00:38:01,720
Speaker 2: who personally loves to tell folks when I'm doing something great,

788
00:38:01,880 --> 00:38:03,920
Speaker 2: and I don't do that to be braggadocious. I do

789
00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:06,479
Speaker 2: it because I feel like it's inspiring. There's some little

790
00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:08,480
Speaker 2: girl out there from the east side of Detroit who

791
00:38:08,640 --> 00:38:11,240
Speaker 2: never thought that she could be in a certain place,

792
00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:12,680
Speaker 2: and I want to be able to be like sis,

793
00:38:12,680 --> 00:38:14,520
Speaker 2: I came from the same place you came from.

794
00:38:14,320 --> 00:38:15,560
Speaker 3: No doubt, believe me.

795
00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:17,479
Speaker 4: We can do it and here's how.

796
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:21,080
Speaker 2: But sometimes you might not see me doing nothing, and

797
00:38:21,080 --> 00:38:23,200
Speaker 2: you'll be thinking to yourself. Girl Terrika's talking about she

798
00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:25,000
Speaker 2: finna do this, and that girl like did nothing. She

799
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:28,840
Speaker 2: ain't posted nothing, she ain't seen nothing like let me

800
00:38:29,040 --> 00:38:31,680
Speaker 2: do nothing, because you don't know what my nothing looks like.

801
00:38:31,880 --> 00:38:35,120
Speaker 2: If my nothing is what's given me peace of mind

802
00:38:35,600 --> 00:38:38,440
Speaker 2: to move forward, let me do nothing.

803
00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:44,120
Speaker 1: It's cool, it is, it is, Yes, it is, And

804
00:38:44,239 --> 00:38:48,640
Speaker 1: you know what, Sometimes it's okay to just sit in silence.

805
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:51,759
Speaker 3: That's it because you know what. I'm doing this for me,

806
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:55,080
Speaker 3: not you, and right now this is what I need.

807
00:38:55,440 --> 00:38:57,800
Speaker 3: I need some meantime.

808
00:38:58,440 --> 00:38:58,600
Speaker 2: Now.

809
00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:03,279
Speaker 3: In that meantime, you have no idea what I'm doing

810
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:04,320
Speaker 3: or what I'm working on.

811
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:08,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, And the last thing that she says before we

812
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:11,680
Speaker 2: had this out to get back on track is to

813
00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:17,319
Speaker 2: not assume defeat. And we touched on this earlier. Sometimes

814
00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:21,400
Speaker 2: we're not really focused on the right goal right. Sometimes

815
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:25,080
Speaker 2: we confuse the process for the endgame. Sometimes we think

816
00:39:25,160 --> 00:39:27,439
Speaker 2: we have to do A, B and C in order

817
00:39:27,520 --> 00:39:29,880
Speaker 2: to get to D. Maybe doing A B and C

818
00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:32,719
Speaker 2: and how we get to D and instead of just saying, oh,

819
00:39:32,920 --> 00:39:34,960
Speaker 2: AB and C didn't work right, so I guess I'll

820
00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:35,560
Speaker 2: never get D.

821
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:36,839
Speaker 4: Switch it up.

822
00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:41,800
Speaker 2: I get asked all the time from students who are like, T,

823
00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:43,640
Speaker 2: I want to get into sports journalism.

824
00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:46,759
Speaker 4: I want to be on ESPN. How do I do that?

825
00:39:47,120 --> 00:39:48,719
Speaker 2: And I'm like, in my head, the first thing I

826
00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:50,640
Speaker 2: think is, since I'm the wrong, want to ask, cause

827
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 2: I ain't got this shit figured out. I ain't one

828
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:55,879
Speaker 2: hundred percent doing what I want to do just yet right,

829
00:39:56,360 --> 00:39:58,360
Speaker 2: the end game won't look the same. But what I

830
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:01,319
Speaker 2: always end up telling folks when ask me that it's

831
00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:03,760
Speaker 2: just this is my process.

832
00:40:04,080 --> 00:40:06,520
Speaker 3: Yes, this is how I did it.

833
00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:10,080
Speaker 2: How I did it and how you might do it

834
00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:14,440
Speaker 2: is totally different. That does not mean that you can't

835
00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:17,320
Speaker 2: do it. It's just it might look different for you

836
00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 2: than different for me. So, if this is the end game,

837
00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:24,279
Speaker 2: these are the traditional steps, these are the steps I took.

838
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:27,040
Speaker 2: You figure out what works best for you.

839
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:29,880
Speaker 4: But we just can't assume defeat.

840
00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:34,120
Speaker 1: Everybody's journey is different and it might take me longer

841
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:36,239
Speaker 1: to get there, but I'm gonna get there.

842
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:40,840
Speaker 3: To her, point, don't assume defeat. That's easier said than done, though.

843
00:40:41,239 --> 00:40:43,839
Speaker 1: Because I know for me personally, there are times when

844
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:45,600
Speaker 1: I'm like, you know what, I'm about to go do

845
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:51,279
Speaker 1: this and I get through door one, just crushed it.

846
00:40:51,360 --> 00:40:53,879
Speaker 3: I get through door two, just crushed it. Door three

847
00:40:54,120 --> 00:40:57,560
Speaker 3: is just the stubber. It just won't let me in.

848
00:40:58,440 --> 00:41:03,399
Speaker 1: So instead of me another way around, I just bag

849
00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:05,040
Speaker 1: up and say, I guess I ain't supposed to do that.

850
00:41:05,760 --> 00:41:08,560
Speaker 3: It's easier said than done. I love that.

851
00:41:09,160 --> 00:41:10,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, don't have to defeat.

852
00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:13,680
Speaker 2: Don't assume defeat because I know if you're a religious person,

853
00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:15,839
Speaker 2: and that was something we didn't really talk on during

854
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:18,920
Speaker 2: this episode, but that plays a large role in some

855
00:41:19,080 --> 00:41:21,160
Speaker 2: of the goals we set in some of the reasons

856
00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:23,560
Speaker 2: why we put pressure on ourselves too, because we quick to.

857
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:24,680
Speaker 4: Be like, you know, a black felk.

858
00:41:24,840 --> 00:41:28,040
Speaker 2: The Bible said, yeah, well the Bible said no fornication either,

859
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:29,440
Speaker 2: and we ain't gonna talk about what you was doing

860
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:30,000
Speaker 2: at nineteen.

861
00:41:30,320 --> 00:41:31,719
Speaker 3: We really want to bring the Bible in this.

862
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:34,879
Speaker 4: You want to bring the Bible, girl, but we're quick

863
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:35,400
Speaker 4: to do that.

864
00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:38,880
Speaker 3: We're so wach to do that. Listen, Bible says a

865
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,200
Speaker 3: whole lot of things. But you're only gonna pick out

866
00:41:41,239 --> 00:41:42,560
Speaker 3: the things that you think I'm doing.

867
00:41:42,640 --> 00:41:44,840
Speaker 1: Let's talk about what you doing, talk about what you

868
00:41:45,040 --> 00:41:47,880
Speaker 1: You was dropping it like it's hot Saturday night, but Sunday,

869
00:41:47,920 --> 00:41:48,160
Speaker 1: you the.

870
00:41:48,280 --> 00:41:49,359
Speaker 3: First one at church.

871
00:41:49,560 --> 00:41:52,719
Speaker 1: Okay, anyway, okay, I'm glad at you for going to

872
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:53,960
Speaker 1: get your glory and repent.

873
00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:57,280
Speaker 4: And I'm just saying, don't judge me for that, no doubt.

874
00:41:57,320 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 3: That's all I'm because I'm not judging you, Sais. But

875
00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:02,920
Speaker 3: I saw you because I was witch, because I was

876
00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:03,279
Speaker 3: with you.

877
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:06,520
Speaker 2: I was with you dropping it like it was hot

878
00:42:06,600 --> 00:42:09,200
Speaker 2: on Saturday, and I'm gonna be with you in church

879
00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:10,000
Speaker 2: on Sunday.

880
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:11,880
Speaker 4: The difference says, I'm here for me.

881
00:42:12,440 --> 00:42:14,279
Speaker 3: I ain't here to be judging you.

882
00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:20,000
Speaker 1: Bible said don't drunkenness is a sin. We both off

883
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:21,239
Speaker 1: the remy what's wrong with you?

884
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:24,719
Speaker 3: Oh my god?

885
00:42:24,920 --> 00:42:28,799
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I'm saying, but it's neither hear him.

886
00:42:29,120 --> 00:42:31,640
Speaker 2: It's neither here nor there. But the whole point that

887
00:42:31,719 --> 00:42:35,279
Speaker 2: I'm making, yes, it's a trip. But the whole point

888
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:37,560
Speaker 2: that I'm making is sometimes when folks are religious, they

889
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:39,160
Speaker 2: will say that just wasn't.

890
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:40,480
Speaker 3: What God wanted me to do.

891
00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:44,640
Speaker 2: Maybe maybe God was trying to tell you, this is

892
00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:46,040
Speaker 2: what I want you to do, but I need you

893
00:42:46,120 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 2: to find another way.

894
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:49,600
Speaker 1: God didn't say don't get married. He said, don't get

895
00:42:49,640 --> 00:42:50,640
Speaker 1: married to that fool.

896
00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:54,120
Speaker 3: You missed it. You feel what he said?

897
00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:56,760
Speaker 4: God way to be a CEO.

898
00:42:57,280 --> 00:42:58,800
Speaker 3: He didn't want you to run that mag and he

899
00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:01,880
Speaker 3: has something. I love it.

900
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:02,759
Speaker 2: You miss it.

901
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:11,040
Speaker 3: I love it, but it's so true as deft like

902
00:43:11,239 --> 00:43:11,799
Speaker 3: ct it out.

903
00:43:12,440 --> 00:43:16,280
Speaker 4: Cut it out anyway. Let me get off my soap

904
00:43:16,320 --> 00:43:18,359
Speaker 4: by y'all. We're gonna be right back so we can

905
00:43:18,440 --> 00:43:20,359
Speaker 4: level this thing. Go on. We're gonna be back, y'all.

906
00:43:29,640 --> 00:43:32,560
Speaker 2: Alrin, sis man, it's been a great show, as we

907
00:43:32,800 --> 00:43:34,799
Speaker 2: always have a good time chopping it up.

908
00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:37,640
Speaker 4: I just feel like, you know, moving forward, I'm gonna be.

909
00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:41,640
Speaker 2: Even more intentional than usual about making sure that I'm

910
00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:43,960
Speaker 2: in the right space when I create whatever goals I'm

911
00:43:43,960 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 2: setting for myself for this year, but also that I'm

912
00:43:46,640 --> 00:43:49,600
Speaker 2: very intentional about the people I share them with the

913
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:52,239
Speaker 2: process that I take to accomplish them, because I just

914
00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 2: want to do right and I just want to celebrate

915
00:43:54,760 --> 00:43:58,120
Speaker 2: my wins and celebrate my friends and their wins so

916
00:43:58,239 --> 00:44:00,000
Speaker 2: that we can all really just be successful this year.

917
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:01,799
Speaker 3: You know, I'm gonna try to do the same thing.

918
00:44:01,920 --> 00:44:04,319
Speaker 3: And we talked about this last week.

919
00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:07,279
Speaker 1: New Year's resolutions, all those things, they're just not for

920
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:10,759
Speaker 1: me anymore. And again I'm going to go off of

921
00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:13,360
Speaker 1: what you said, what Stacy Kim said. I'm going to

922
00:44:13,440 --> 00:44:17,320
Speaker 1: focus on me, focus on all that extra shit and

923
00:44:17,440 --> 00:44:18,759
Speaker 1: everything else is going on.

924
00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:21,399
Speaker 3: Because it's gonna be there. I can't let it get

925
00:44:21,440 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 3: to me.

926
00:44:22,040 --> 00:44:25,480
Speaker 1: But you had some gems. You had some really good

927
00:44:25,520 --> 00:44:27,239
Speaker 1: stuff for the people today and for.

928
00:44:27,360 --> 00:44:28,000
Speaker 3: Me as well.

929
00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:30,640
Speaker 4: I love it. I love it, I appreciate it.

930
00:44:31,239 --> 00:44:34,360
Speaker 3: So I'm gonna give us something real, short and sweet

931
00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:35,839
Speaker 3: to level us off.

932
00:44:36,400 --> 00:44:41,399
Speaker 2: You got me traumatized, now, sure, just a positive thought, y'all.

933
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:44,959
Speaker 1: Tea told me my positive thought was long last week,

934
00:44:45,280 --> 00:44:50,640
Speaker 1: so I'm okay. But you know what, it's really spot

935
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:53,480
Speaker 1: on for what this topic is about. When we talk

936
00:44:53,520 --> 00:44:56,239
Speaker 1: about goal setting and putting too much pressure on us.

937
00:44:56,640 --> 00:44:57,800
Speaker 3: We need to live our life.

938
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:03,319
Speaker 1: So this sense in between goals is a thing called

939
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:06,760
Speaker 1: life that has to be lived and enjoyed.

940
00:45:07,560 --> 00:45:09,640
Speaker 3: So go live your life. Period.

941
00:45:11,280 --> 00:45:13,960
Speaker 4: That was a really good one because it was short

942
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:17,840
Speaker 4: and sweet. It wasn't because it was short. I'm messing

943
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:24,120
Speaker 4: with you. I was no, I was telling was too long.

944
00:45:24,840 --> 00:45:27,440
Speaker 1: But she goes start as a quote talking about but

945
00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:29,320
Speaker 1: I got a short one for us, and I was like,

946
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:31,640
Speaker 1: since that shit won short. By the time I finished,

947
00:45:31,680 --> 00:45:34,160
Speaker 1: I was like, damn, that really wasn't short. But today

948
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:36,760
Speaker 1: a good one. Yeah, And it was a good message,

949
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:37,920
Speaker 1: really good message.

950
00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:40,680
Speaker 4: I really loved that. So, yes, set your goals, but

951
00:45:40,840 --> 00:45:41,520
Speaker 4: live your life.

952
00:45:41,719 --> 00:45:44,319
Speaker 2: And we hope that part of living your life means

953
00:45:44,400 --> 00:45:47,120
Speaker 2: continuing to listen to the Levels of this podcast because

954
00:45:47,239 --> 00:45:50,360
Speaker 2: we appreciate that, and we want to make sure that

955
00:45:50,640 --> 00:45:53,759
Speaker 2: we are sharing our thoughts and sharing information that you

956
00:45:53,920 --> 00:45:55,800
Speaker 2: find beneficial and that you relate to.

957
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:58,400
Speaker 4: So please continue to let us know if you're.

958
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:01,719
Speaker 2: Enjoying our next level conversations about the real shit that

959
00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:04,400
Speaker 2: women go through. Right, So, leave us a review in

960
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:07,240
Speaker 2: Apple Podcasts, or you can email us at the Levels

961
00:46:07,280 --> 00:46:09,680
Speaker 2: of this podcast at gmail dot com. Tell us what

962
00:46:09,800 --> 00:46:12,359
Speaker 2: you thought of this week's show, tell us what maybe

963
00:46:12,400 --> 00:46:14,360
Speaker 2: you want to talk about next. For that matter, you

964
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:16,239
Speaker 2: can even share what some of the goals are that

965
00:46:16,320 --> 00:46:16,800
Speaker 2: you're setting.

966
00:46:16,840 --> 00:46:17,760
Speaker 4: We are not haters.

967
00:46:18,000 --> 00:46:20,880
Speaker 2: We're not gonna steal y'all idea neither, So it's okay.

968
00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:23,040
Speaker 2: You just share your goals with us.

969
00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:29,320
Speaker 4: Okay, now make sure you're also following us on Instagram

970
00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:30,319
Speaker 4: at lttpod.

971
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:33,759
Speaker 2: But until next time, guys, keep your mentals ground level

972
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:35,200
Speaker 2: and we'll be back next week.

973
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:35,840
Speaker 3: Peace.

974
00:46:38,520 --> 00:46:42,960
Speaker 1: Listen to Levels to This on America's number one podcast network, iHeart.

975
00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:45,880
Speaker 1: Open your free iHeart app and search levels to this

976
00:46:46,040 --> 00:46:49,200
Speaker 1: with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster Brasby and start listening