Speaker 1: The shit that happens behind the scenes of the tour
Speaker 1: is probably more entertaining than the tour itself.
Speaker 2: That is a fact.
Speaker 3: And I cannot think of one moment that was my
Speaker 3: favorite moment.
Speaker 2: I had so many favorite moments on this tour. Hilarious,
Speaker 2: dead Ass. Hey, I'm Kadeen and I'm Devout and we're
Speaker 2: the Ellis's.
Speaker 4: You may know us from posting funny videos with our.
Speaker 3: Voice and reading each other publicly as.
Speaker 2: A form of therapy. Wait, I make you need therapy
Speaker 2: most days.
Speaker 4: Wow.
Speaker 2: Oh and one more important thing to mention, we're married, Yes.
Speaker 4: Sir, we are.
Speaker 1: We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of
Speaker 1: li's most taboo topics.
Speaker 2: Things most folks don't want to talk about.
Speaker 1: Through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead ass
Speaker 1: is a term that we say every day. So when
Speaker 1: we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts one hundred
Speaker 1: the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
Speaker 1: We about to take philotof to our whole new level.
Speaker 3: Dead Ass starts right now.
Speaker 4: Story time.
Speaker 1: So first thing I want to do is shout out
Speaker 1: my cast and my crew, the team.
Speaker 2: We love y'all, oh man so much, but this story.
Speaker 1: It's about our driver, said, because said had the nerve
Speaker 1: to try to joke on me for trying to help
Speaker 1: with the bags. You know what I'm saying, Like, our
Speaker 1: crew is predominantly women, right, Other than Matt and Josh,
Speaker 1: everybody else on the tour is a woman. So there's
Speaker 1: a lot of bags they have. You know, we have
Speaker 1: all the luggage, we have.
Speaker 3: The clothes, and sure he literally has like three body
Speaker 3: bags full of clothes about like, how many outfits are
Speaker 3: you traveling with?
Speaker 2: We have one tour stops.
Speaker 1: So whenever we get to a stop, I want to
Speaker 1: help unload because I know that the ladies can't and said,
Speaker 1: be getting out the cars sounding like batman. So I
Speaker 1: always get out first. I don't wait if I'm not
Speaker 1: that type of guy. It's like I'm with like town
Speaker 1: talent driver and he's open the door. No, So I
Speaker 1: always get out the car first so that I can help.
Speaker 1: And when I get out the car and by the
Speaker 1: time I get to the back said, it's still not there.
Speaker 1: So I opened the door and I'm unloading the bags
Speaker 1: and I hear behind me I leave the bags alone,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, my nigga, why the fuck do you
Speaker 1: sound like Batman? He then says to me, I have
Speaker 1: a signis infection.
Speaker 4: That's it?
Speaker 1: Said, why every time we go into a you sick
Speaker 1: bro period?
Speaker 4: Wow? Last year he had a kidney Yeah, so I
Speaker 4: don't know.
Speaker 2: It was a kidney and chest pain. Maybe it was
Speaker 2: two different doors, two different stops.
Speaker 1: There was two different at one point he had a
Speaker 1: kidney issue and he had to go to the hospital,
Speaker 1: and then he did also have a chess problem business
Speaker 1: out there, and we all need to pray for, sayd,
Speaker 1: that's my man's we got pray for. So I'm unloading
Speaker 1: the bags, right. He's like, they're making jokes with Matt
Speaker 1: calling me Belle hop ellis.
Speaker 4: Right.
Speaker 1: So I said, all I fuck it, I ain't lifting
Speaker 1: another fucking bag, right. So I go across the street
Speaker 1: and I'm watching said labor across the street with the bags.
Speaker 4: So I'm like, you good, bro. He's like yeah, I
Speaker 4: said you're not. You're not good.
Speaker 2: Then I was like, are you antibiotics?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: You remember hearing antibiotics thing?
Speaker 3: He was like, bro, you have a sinus affection and
Speaker 3: you're getting antibiotics in yo.
Speaker 4: He said, I'm a head of that. When I get back.
Speaker 1: I said, you will not make it back, said, you
Speaker 1: can't even make it back to.
Speaker 4: The van right now?
Speaker 3: Bro.
Speaker 2: That was in New York.
Speaker 3: Yes, that was to drive to Philly do a show,
Speaker 3: drive to DC do a show, and for him to
Speaker 3: get back home.
Speaker 1: Yes, that said, but you know what about said though,
Speaker 1: said always going to be exactly what he needed to
Speaker 1: be when we need.
Speaker 2: Him to be there, so reliable.
Speaker 1: He gonna take eight thousand trips because we do have
Speaker 1: some demanding women on our tour who need things and
Speaker 1: they always call and said, like said, is an uber
Speaker 1: and said, never says no to them.
Speaker 4: He just walks right up to me and goes and
Speaker 4: I'm like, said you all right, yeah, man, we're gonna talk.
Speaker 4: I said, are we going to talk? Because right now
Speaker 4: you can't talk?
Speaker 2: I love that? Was that a favorite moment of yours
Speaker 2: for the tour?
Speaker 1: It was because like Josh and Matt, typically there's two vans, right,
Speaker 1: Josh is always in the van with his crew, and
Speaker 1: it's me and me and Matt. So me and Matt
Speaker 1: are typically the only dudes in the van. So the
Speaker 1: only person that we have that camaraderie with that gets us.
Speaker 1: It's said, so we have our own little locker room
Speaker 1: in the front. So we be arguing about who's better
Speaker 1: push your tea versus jay Z, which to me ain't
Speaker 1: even a fucking argument.
Speaker 4: But how you argue with somebody who was like this,
Speaker 4: push your te does the best cocaine rap.
Speaker 1: So Matt, stupid Matt gonna talk about something. Do a
Speaker 1: push your t rap right now?
Speaker 4: No one said can't because he can't even bring Well, listen.
Speaker 3: All we need, said you to do is drive safely
Speaker 3: from point A to point B.
Speaker 2: He does that every single type and you don't.
Speaker 4: Notice because you'll be sleep.
Speaker 1: Me and Matt being in front, and all we hear
Speaker 1: is the thing. And Matt be like, YO said put
Speaker 1: your seat but on, and he'd be like, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: just turn up the music and.
Speaker 4: Put your seat on. Bro.
Speaker 2: The logic come on, said Ric.
Speaker 3: How you gonna protect us be security and driver, but
Speaker 3: you're not protecting yourself, sir.
Speaker 1: He's gonna tell you I've been doing this for years.
Speaker 1: Ain't no seat belt gonna save me? Swear God, this
Speaker 1: swee told me. Okay, I said, I said, well, well
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put my seatbelt on period, all right, because
Speaker 1: I know I'm gonna need some help getting on these
Speaker 1: bags out of the back because you ain't even get
Speaker 1: to the back of the van in time period. Me
Speaker 1: and Matt unloaded the bags, said we love you Batman,
Speaker 1: all right, West.
Speaker 4: Batman, Batman said. Batman said, but that.
Speaker 1: Is one of my favorite moments like this one of
Speaker 1: my favorite times, like traveling and having time to spend with,
Speaker 1: you know, with everybody's one of my.
Speaker 3: Favorite good story time, mad stories, story stories for days, y'all,
Speaker 3: stories for days, all right, karaoke time now. When Develle
Speaker 3: came up with the episode and he said, you know,
Speaker 3: let's do a favorite moment's episode because we already spoke
Speaker 3: to you guys about how the tour came to be
Speaker 3: and all that good stuff, creative direction all that.
Speaker 2: So he said, what's on do you want to do
Speaker 2: for karaoke?
Speaker 3: So I could have done something about like, oh, favorites
Speaker 3: this that, you know, having a great time, blah blah blah,
Speaker 3: But this one is pulled from one of my personal
Speaker 3: favorite moments on the tour. On a shout out our
Speaker 3: girl Urihanna, who came to see.
Speaker 2: Us at the Apollo from Brooklyn.
Speaker 3: From Brooklyn, our cousin Jadass who was in the roof
Speaker 3: top Joints. You know, she was up top, you know
Speaker 3: what I'm saying. So her video has gone viral social
Speaker 3: media after Trible interviewed her after the show. So maybe
Speaker 3: we can talk about this as we come out of karaoke,
Speaker 3: and we'll give you more background into Urihana and how
Speaker 3: this became a thing and how she pretty much became
Speaker 3: famous from a moment at the Apollo show where Deval
Speaker 3: had to check her. But in the video, you know,
Speaker 3: she was talking to Triple and she was about to
Speaker 3: meet us in the meet and greet line and Triple
Speaker 3: was like, they know your voice from the show at
Speaker 3: the Apollo and she was like, oh, this is beef.
Speaker 4: A little bit.
Speaker 5: She said, what they do, it's beef a little bit.
Speaker 5: That's exactly what you said, Uriana. It's a hashtag now
Speaker 5: it's beef in one word. Okay, that you inspired that.
Speaker 3: But also in the video she ended with saying in
Speaker 3: her own video that she posted after with her recap
Speaker 3: Sorry two thousand and four by Ruben Stutter, and it
Speaker 3: goes like this girl, this is my sorry fun two
Speaker 3: thousand and four, and I ain't gonna miss no more this.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna take this.
Speaker 3: One chance and make it real clear that I'm sorry
Speaker 3: for May, I'm sorry for Jude, and I'm.
Speaker 2: Sorry for July.
Speaker 3: The fact that this song came back up and resurfaced
Speaker 3: me and Trouble listen to it when we got back home.
Speaker 3: We just pull up the YouTube video and Triple knew
Speaker 3: the song word for words.
Speaker 4: It was a song like it slapped sack. It was
Speaker 4: about was it?
Speaker 2: It was two thousand and four that he made the song.
Speaker 4: Why would it be another year?
Speaker 2: Kay, I'm sorry for it might have been two thousand
Speaker 2: and five.
Speaker 4: Why wouldn't be sorry for two thousand and four and
Speaker 4: two thousand and.
Speaker 2: Five because it's a reflection he's sorry for all the
Speaker 2: months prior.
Speaker 4: You know, it's funny you said that you may be right.
Speaker 1: I know you wanted to disagree with this, but I
Speaker 1: was like, nah, you may be right, because in order
Speaker 1: for to be sorry for two thousand and four, he
Speaker 1: wrote it in.
Speaker 3: Two thousand and five, or it could have been two
Speaker 3: thousand and six and he just recapped two thousand and four.
Speaker 4: No, I'm pretty sure it might have been me for
Speaker 4: a little bit. Gonna check it.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna check it all right, y'all, stick around while
Speaker 3: we checked this whole thing here with Ruben thunder song,
Speaker 3: and we're gonna pay some bills and come back, all right,
Speaker 3: stick around, all.
Speaker 2: Right, we're back.
Speaker 3: So we did some fact checking real quick, just so
Speaker 3: we can round out karaoke time. And it turns out
Speaker 3: that Rubens Thuter dropped that song in two thousand and three,
Speaker 3: so he was sorry for two thousand and four.
Speaker 2: It was a preemptive he knew he was.
Speaker 4: He said, baby, I'm sorry what I'm about to do.
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. So let me let you know.
Speaker 3: He was trying to be proactive versus reactive exactly by
Speaker 3: putting out the song early because he knew he was
Speaker 3: gonna be Ain't shit, that's crazy.
Speaker 4: Let me apologize, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: If you think about it, a lot of R and
Speaker 1: B is about apologizing for shit you wasn't supposed to do.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, So it's like, while I'm apologizing for being like
Speaker 3: a dirt bag or being for like a bum bitch,
Speaker 3: let me just also at least.
Speaker 1: We apologize again, you know what I'm saying, Alicia, apologize.
Speaker 4: They remember Donnelle Jones and I wish I never met her.
Speaker 6: Yeah, even though I love her so and she got
Speaker 6: love for me, but she still being longs to someone else.
Speaker 2: True.
Speaker 1: That whole song was about him being in love with
Speaker 1: somebody else wife baby, And he ain't apologized or.
Speaker 3: Ruben, you was on something you was on or something
Speaker 3: Ruben shout out to Ruben study where's he at now?
Speaker 4: Apologizing?
Speaker 2: Still apologizing to twenty four?
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm sorry for out of twenty twenty four.
Speaker 4: I ain't gonna mess.
Speaker 6: Up no moment that's effect because it still twenty years And.
Speaker 3: But seriously, though, that was a that was a funny
Speaker 3: moment for me. That was one of my favorite moments.
Speaker 3: So in the moment right at the Apollo, Yes, New
Speaker 3: York was live, okay. And one thing about a New
Speaker 3: York audience, when you talk, they're going to talk back. Yes,
Speaker 3: We're talking back like the entire time. Like when you
Speaker 3: just like put a question out there, they're going to answer,
Speaker 3: which we love because and we said, being in the
Speaker 3: spaces with y'all in live, real time is really what
Speaker 3: gives the energy and a lot of the times when
Speaker 3: we recap the shows after the crew will go around
Speaker 3: and be like yo, which was your favorite show? Like
Speaker 3: Dan this The energy of the crowd tonight was like
Speaker 3: it was great. So during for those of you who
Speaker 3: weren't at the Apollo show, during the Q and a
Speaker 3: portion of the show, which is towards the end, we
Speaker 3: normally have Trible and Donora in the aisles with microphones,
Speaker 3: and we allow the crowd to come forward. Whoever has
Speaker 3: questions for de Valini to ask, that's their moment to
Speaker 3: have that one on one time with us, and we
Speaker 3: generally will answer the questions so.
Speaker 2: The best of our ability. Yes, Now in New York,
Speaker 2: I believe Uriana.
Speaker 3: Who was up in the rooftop joints so she was
Speaker 3: at the top right, she believed that the people asking
Speaker 3: the questions down below were not asking good questions. She said,
Speaker 3: we got real problems. We got real problems up in
Speaker 3: the rooftop joints. So instead of making her way down
Speaker 3: to ask a question, she was like shouting questions from
Speaker 3: the top, and she had a voice baby that carried.
Speaker 3: She reminded me of like your typical Brooklyn Roundaway girl
Speaker 3: that we love and know. You know, we have a
Speaker 3: couple of friends who we can even think of like oh,
Speaker 3: she was just like such as that, Yeah, that's just loud.
Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean? And don't mean any
Speaker 2: harm by your at all. It's all love.
Speaker 3: But she was shouting from the rooftops, literal questions like
Speaker 3: we got real problems up here, like like, how come
Speaker 3: y'all like coming up to me. I don't think she
Speaker 3: believed that the process was you have to come down
Speaker 3: to the microphone. So Tripple interviewed her after and it
Speaker 3: was a really hilarious video where she was just like,
Speaker 3: you know, we got real problems up there, and I
Speaker 3: just wanted to know. But then Deval checked me. And
Speaker 3: the fact that Deval checked her, like tell him about
Speaker 3: the moment where you checked her.
Speaker 4: Well, to be honest, I was.
Speaker 1: I was more concerned about her in that moment because
Speaker 1: we are in New York and there's mad Brooklyn people
Speaker 1: in there, there's mad hauling people in there. People want
Speaker 1: to hear questions, and when we couldn't hear the people
Speaker 1: asking the questions because she was screaming, I heard people
Speaker 1: murmuring and people started getting.
Speaker 4: You know, or like yo, especially need to shut the
Speaker 4: fuck up.
Speaker 1: And I was like, before it gets to that, and
Speaker 1: I didn't know who she was with, and then they
Speaker 1: start screaming back at each other. Then it becomes a problem.
Speaker 1: I said, let me just intervene not be disrespectful. And
Speaker 1: I was just like, hey, yo, shorty, like like real talk.
Speaker 1: You think that you being disrespectful is going to get
Speaker 1: you called on, That's not how you go and get
Speaker 1: called on.
Speaker 4: And she screamed out.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I'm so sorry that it's all love, and
Speaker 1: I was like, it's all love, ma, It's all love.
Speaker 1: But it really was in an attempt to kind of
Speaker 1: like settle what was brewing. And I've been in places where,
Speaker 1: of course, I grew up in Flatbush.
Speaker 4: I remember going to Ken Moore movie theater.
Speaker 1: I remember being in Kim Moore movie theater and somebody
Speaker 1: started talking to the screen and then somebody screams out,
Speaker 1: he yo, shut the fuck up, and well, you shut
Speaker 1: the fuck up, make me, And then before you know it,
Speaker 1: it becomes a thing that has nothing to do with
Speaker 1: the movie.
Speaker 3: Right, that's true. I didn't even think of it that way,
Speaker 3: but yeah, you're right. Environments like that, you know, the
Speaker 3: beef a little bit can turned to beef A lot
Speaker 3: of it, A lot.
Speaker 2: Of it, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: And to be honest, she wasn't trying to be disrespectful now.
Speaker 1: She was enjoying her she was.
Speaker 3: She definitely said she had time and she was like,
Speaker 3: I was talking to me even though the valve was
Speaker 3: checking her.
Speaker 2: She was like, Yo, Devo spoke to me like period.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was it was cool and it was all love.
Speaker 4: It was against the world.
Speaker 1: And I never want anyone to leave the Dead Ass
Speaker 1: Podcast experience in a bad mood or in a bad place,
Speaker 1: like when we do the meet and Greece. I always
Speaker 1: tell people, Yo, make sure you get home safe because
Speaker 1: I also never want people to leave in it here.
Speaker 4: Oh you know we left from dead that's and this happened.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I always want them to leave and go home
Speaker 1: and feel like, man, I really felt better after being there.
Speaker 2: So what that was about, Yeah, totally, that's fun. That's fun.
Speaker 2: So yeah, that was a little more context to the
Speaker 2: part of karaoke.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 3: But then for story time where de Vous spoke about Cedric,
Speaker 3: Cedric was just one piece of the team. But it
Speaker 3: just shows like we genuinely are concerned about our team,
Speaker 3: Like we had to adjust a couple of things within
Speaker 3: the schedule, to make sure that our team was getting rest,
Speaker 3: that we weren't up at the crack of dawn checking
Speaker 3: out of one hotel to get on the road to
Speaker 3: not be able to check into another hotel. Like, we
Speaker 3: wanted to make sure that everybody was comfortable along the
Speaker 3: way because we genuinely feel like we're not going to
Speaker 3: be able to do this if our team is not
Speaker 3: healthy and if they're not safe.
Speaker 2: So shout out to Cedric for or being that.
Speaker 3: You know, we're always worried and concerned about him, so
Speaker 3: we want to make sure that he's good.
Speaker 1: Take care of yourself, said man, real talk man. We
Speaker 1: as black men often say we'll take care of it later.
Speaker 1: We'll handle it later. Oh, let me get this done,
Speaker 1: because you know you're a workaholic. Orse like, my health
Speaker 1: is never the priority. I got to take care of
Speaker 1: everybody else instead. Is that type of guy, He's always
Speaker 1: focused on everybody else. Yeah, and then you'll always take
Speaker 1: care of it later until there is no more later.
Speaker 2: That's a fact.
Speaker 3: I mean, baby Deve, I don't even know it, but
Speaker 3: he got about two three doctors appointments coming up this
Speaker 3: week because you that tour yesterday, so he about to
Speaker 3: get blood work, stool samples, sample, chiropractor appointment. You got
Speaker 3: a couple coming up, baby, I mean only a ship.
Speaker 2: Always.
Speaker 3: Baby, You're nasty always always. But anyway, really back to
Speaker 3: more favorite moments from our Love Against the World tour.
Speaker 3: Did you have a favorite stop? We had Dallas first,
Speaker 3: which was an almost sold out show. The only seats
Speaker 3: that didn't sell out in that show were in the
Speaker 3: roof top choices.
Speaker 2: They were on top of the building.
Speaker 3: So when we saw the venue, we kind of understood
Speaker 3: why nobody would want to buy those tickets, though I
Speaker 3: didn't believe that was really a bad seat in the house,
Speaker 3: but the ones at the very top balcony never sold out.
Speaker 1: But this is the truth, though, and I got d MS,
Speaker 1: people said, if I knew the show was going to
Speaker 1: be that, I would have got those tickets because they weren't.
Speaker 1: They didn't know what to expect, and why would I
Speaker 1: sit up there to hear them talk.
Speaker 2: Like the podcast show you didn't want to be that far.
Speaker 4: But then once they saw the clips of the show,
Speaker 4: they were like, damn, I would have got those tickets
Speaker 4: to be there for that. Yeah, you know, so.
Speaker 2: So that's a note to Dallas.
Speaker 3: If we ever go back to that venue again, just
Speaker 3: make sure that you guys get the tickets up top
Speaker 3: if you have to, because it was majestic theater. Yes,
Speaker 3: and there's not like really literally no bad seat in
Speaker 3: the house, and the energy is so electric. But we
Speaker 3: had Dallas, we had the Apollo in New York, we
Speaker 3: had the Fillmore Theater in Philly, we had Warner Warner
Speaker 3: Theater out in.
Speaker 4: D c DC.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be honest, it's hard for me to say
Speaker 1: I had a favorite spot because it seemed like with
Speaker 1: every show the crowd got more alive and they were
Speaker 1: more in tune.
Speaker 4: But it's also not fit at.
Speaker 1: The early shows because the later shows got an opportunity
Speaker 1: to see what was coming in social media. And I
Speaker 1: remember when we went to go see Beyonce the first
Speaker 1: couple of shows, you was like, the crowd was a
Speaker 1: little and it was sweet, but the crowd was kind
Speaker 1: of But by the time they got to Atlanta and
Speaker 1: anybody knew how to do that what was it the
Speaker 1: mute challenge and there were so many different things.
Speaker 3: They were practicing. So you're you're absolutely right about that.
Speaker 3: I think about how the show evolved from Dallas to Atlanta,
Speaker 3: like even Dead Ass Court. We added the Blazers and
Speaker 3: the Josh came out as Bayles. At the end of
Speaker 3: the Atlanta added the judge exactly, so every show progressively
Speaker 3: got better. And that's a great analogy that you made.
Speaker 3: When I saw the very first Renaissance show in Sweden,
Speaker 3: the first two days actually back to back we went,
Speaker 3: and it was a completely different experience there than it
Speaker 3: was in la and Atlanta when we went. So so yeah,
Speaker 3: you know, the people who ended up coming to the
Speaker 3: shows later on the tour, I think really got the
Speaker 3: well oiled machine that we were.
Speaker 4: Though.
Speaker 3: I think Dallas, for our first stop, was so live amazing.
Speaker 2: It was a great time there.
Speaker 1: I was my most nervous in Dallas, and I went
Speaker 1: You can tell if you go back and look at
Speaker 1: the footage from our first show and look at us
Speaker 1: dancing to the last show. The first show, you can
Speaker 1: literally see me going, oh, you were like counting.
Speaker 4: I was counting because I wanted to get the steps.
Speaker 1: And by the time we got to Atlanta, I knew
Speaker 1: the steps, I knew the crowd response. Is so why
Speaker 1: I was able to add things and I just lived
Speaker 1: in it a lot more so for me, Dallas was
Speaker 1: like a good I hate to say practice show, but
Speaker 1: I think Dallas got the raws version of the show
Speaker 1: because that was the first time we had ever performed
Speaker 1: it everything together. Because in these venues you don't get
Speaker 1: a chance to do a wet tech days prior.
Speaker 4: Every day, show up, show up, and do it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, my biggest anxiety moment each show was like dancing
Speaker 3: on a new stage in different shoes.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I can imagine that.
Speaker 2: So it's like I'm.
Speaker 3: Dancing in heels first of all, like actually dancing dancing.
Speaker 3: And then all stages are different. So I remember Dallas
Speaker 3: being super slippery and I was dancing in some shoes
Speaker 3: and I'm just.
Speaker 2: Like, oh no, Dallas slippery.
Speaker 3: The stage was slippery, so I was like, man, I'm
Speaker 3: gonna have to get my shoes scuffed up.
Speaker 2: Sure, we had to put on some.
Speaker 3: Souls on the bottom of it because I'm like, I'm
Speaker 3: sliding all over the stage. And then we went to
Speaker 3: the Apollo and I was like, I'm sticking to the stage,
Speaker 3: Like how am I gonna do this?
Speaker 5: Split?
Speaker 3: And then and I had to kind of like work
Speaker 3: out a way for me to find my way into
Speaker 3: the split because of that. So so yeah, we had
Speaker 3: a lot of those moments where I felt like, damn,
Speaker 3: Dallas did get the royst version. But all things considered,
Speaker 3: Dallas got a dope as first show.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Dallas show is a live spot for us.
Speaker 1: We appreciate you. Dallas also one of our largest venues. Yes,
Speaker 1: sixteen hundred people man in that spot and we sold
Speaker 1: thirteen and forty nine tickets are.
Speaker 2: Only not sold but still the visor.
Speaker 1: Crazy top part, but it was, it was fire. I
Speaker 1: have three like moments to me, okay, that are like
Speaker 1: like moments that I feel epitomize what we wanted to accomplish,
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna do them in the order of three.
Speaker 4: Two, one.
Speaker 2: Okay, we may have some overlapping, I'm thinking, but go ahead, we.
Speaker 4: May Number three. Number three is the baby announcement.
Speaker 1: Oh yes, that was so dude, was so surprised.
Speaker 2: And so happy. Kathy and Jonathan I think their names were.
Speaker 4: I can't.
Speaker 1: I can't remember the name somebody, but I know his
Speaker 1: name was John remember her, Kathy, I remember his name,
Speaker 1: And he cried and I remember him grabbing me and
Speaker 1: hugging me and being like he almost picked me.
Speaker 7: Up, right, he almost knocked me over too, And to
Speaker 7: see the joy on his face to be a father,
Speaker 7: because if you look at social media so much, just
Speaker 7: so much back and forth about men and women in
Speaker 7: fifty fifty in this and you hear so many men
Speaker 7: talking about what they're not going to do and women
Speaker 7: talking about what they're.
Speaker 4: Not going to be. To see a man just stand
Speaker 4: in his power and just be like.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, I'm making everything happen so that my wife
Speaker 1: can give me child and she could be comfortable. And
Speaker 1: he talked about, you know, her mom retiring and his
Speaker 1: mom retiring and created that experience.
Speaker 4: And then when she says she was pregnant.
Speaker 3: Right, and it was her saying, man, my husband wants
Speaker 3: this so badly, and even though I've had my own
Speaker 3: struggles and obstacles with my health, I'm going to do
Speaker 3: this for us and our family.
Speaker 2: So shout out again to Kathy and Jonathan.
Speaker 3: That was a freaking amazing moment, and what a great
Speaker 3: surprise for the crowd.
Speaker 1: That was That would have to be Apollo number three moments. Now,
Speaker 1: I'm going to put these next two moments at one
Speaker 1: A and one B because it really isn't the two Okay.
Speaker 1: The reason it is one A and one B. One
Speaker 1: B would have to be the kids coming out in Apollow.
Speaker 2: That would have been my number one Okay.
Speaker 1: One B is because you saw much I cried hearing
Speaker 1: them introduce me. But I started crying before they even
Speaker 1: introduced me. When Jackson got out there, I wasn't out there.
Speaker 1: You weren't out there. All four of the boys had
Speaker 1: their mics. So now here's a little story about what
Speaker 1: happened backstage. What was supposed to happen in that moment
Speaker 1: was Jackson, Cairo, and Kaz were supposed to go out
Speaker 1: there together. Jackson said, I said, Jackson, you feel comfortable
Speaker 1: introducing me? He said, yeah, what should I say? I said,
Speaker 1: We're going to the Apollo. You research what happened at
Speaker 1: the Apollo, and then you know, you speak to DJ
Speaker 1: executive and find out how he typically introduces me, and
Speaker 1: then you work it out. He said, cool, that's all
Speaker 1: I'm saying. They expect him and he did it. And
Speaker 1: so when he made that introduction, it wasn't now no
Speaker 1: one wrote it for him. He went out there and
Speaker 1: he did his research. He found out who performed at
Speaker 1: the Apollo, he found out who there was. He did
Speaker 1: ask me though, like where can I find videos of
Speaker 1: certain people?
Speaker 4: So when he saw Sammy Davis Junior, that's when he
Speaker 4: came up.
Speaker 1: With the chebaring mind because he was watching videos, yes,
Speaker 1: And that moment just moved me so much because I
Speaker 1: got a chance to watch four little versions of me
Speaker 1: do what I wanted to do. But the three came out,
Speaker 1: and the Coda was supposed to stay back with me
Speaker 1: me because I thought he would be overwhelmed by the moment.
Speaker 1: And then when we introduced you, the Coda was going
Speaker 1: to come out with you in his sands, and I
Speaker 1: think everybody was like, oh my gosh, you came out
Speaker 1: with the baby. We're doing the pre show and the
Speaker 1: Coda sees all of his brothers getting mics and he
Speaker 1: jumps out of Mimi's arms and he's like that got that.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, what's up? And he was pointing at
Speaker 1: the mics. I was like, you want a mic? He
Speaker 1: was like yeah, He's like yeah. So I was just like,
Speaker 1: all right, I'll get your mic, like straight, ignoring him right.
Speaker 1: And then the guy back there whose name was Mike
Speaker 1: Shops my boy Mike at the Apollo. He was just like, yo,
Speaker 1: you want me to get little man the mic. I
Speaker 1: don't even have to turn it on. I'm like, he
Speaker 1: ain't gonna want to mic. Once they go out there
Speaker 1: and start cheering, He's probably gonna run back here.
Speaker 4: Right the time comes.
Speaker 1: For them to go out there, Jackson walks out, getting
Speaker 1: ready to walk out with his mic, and Dakota is
Speaker 1: not like walking away. So I said, Jackson, come in,
Speaker 1: come in, come in, come in. He said what I said,
Speaker 1: just hold the Colda's hand. Dakota hold his hand, and
Speaker 1: then looked at the mic guy that was pointing, and
Speaker 1: Mike gave him his mic, and he walked out there.
Speaker 4: With his brothers.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: And it was just for me.
Speaker 1: It was the feeling of a father watching his oldest
Speaker 1: son take care of his youngest son, and the two
Speaker 1: middles just being there for support. And I was like,
Speaker 1: I felt like I'm raising the right type of young men.
Speaker 2: Oh man. They're solid as a team, super solid.
Speaker 3: It just shows how much Coda cairo Cas look up
Speaker 3: to Jackson and how much Jackson looks out for them.
Speaker 3: Because I watched backstage as I was doing my look
Speaker 3: change and I was kind of waiting for my queue.
Speaker 3: So I saw the Coda go on stage with the
Speaker 3: brothers and I was like, oh my god, like who
Speaker 3: dropped the ball? I thought somebody like messed up and
Speaker 3: like sent Coda out there. And then when I got
Speaker 3: to the you know, the wings to make my way out,
Speaker 3: they were like, no, Coda wanted to go out on
Speaker 3: his own.
Speaker 1: They showed me to how how safe Jackson makes them
Speaker 1: feel because he's the oldest. So being the oldest and
Speaker 1: you're the oldest, I'm the oldest. We know it was
Speaker 1: our responsibility to take care of our siblings. And I
Speaker 1: always tell Jackson like, yo, you're the oldest, you got
Speaker 1: to take care of them.
Speaker 4: I know how much pressure that is.
Speaker 1: But if you watch Jackson on the stage, he always
Speaker 1: made sure he included all of them. When he did
Speaker 1: a dance, he looked, and he he schooled them in.
Speaker 1: When we did our hug and stuff, he made sure
Speaker 1: that the Coda was party were included. That to me
Speaker 1: was my second and I'm saying second because that's my
Speaker 1: favorite moment.
Speaker 4: But that's why I was like one A and one B.
Speaker 3: Okay, I hope you're you're one A is not my
Speaker 3: moment because you literally are taking on my mind.
Speaker 2: I'm annoyed. I know it's not okay, what is it?
Speaker 4: My one a was watching you do a split.
Speaker 1: Oh, because I'm no no no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 1: It wasn't only because I'm nasty, but it's because I've
Speaker 1: watched you work so hard to get it back. But also, Yo,
Speaker 1: if people knew what four kids can do to a
Speaker 1: woman's body, and if they watched you gain weight, lose weight,
Speaker 1: gain weight, lose weight, dance, you were stretching and then
Speaker 1: you felt like you pulled the muscle.
Speaker 3: And yeah, I was worried about that Atlanta show because
Speaker 3: my hip was and the DC show because doing it
Speaker 3: two days in a row, we were ambitious doing like
Speaker 3: three days, which we had done in the past, but
Speaker 3: because we didn't do the actual physicality, it was easier
Speaker 3: in the past.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So for me it was just some It's almost
Speaker 1: about my family, man, you know, And and for me
Speaker 1: everything starts with us and it would be no boys
Speaker 1: if it wasn't for us. So watching you conquer that moment,
Speaker 1: I was just as proud when I watched you walk
Speaker 1: across the stage on Fashion Week in a in a
Speaker 1: in a two piece bikini, so I can believe it
Speaker 1: with a big as I.
Speaker 2: Can't believe that I did that sidebar.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, your ass straight swallowed up freaking leotard. Yea,
Speaker 1: I'm telling you swallowed the leotard up.
Speaker 3: Christina in wardrobe and Cherie, we're literally taping leotards to
Speaker 3: my ass. I see it, double sided tape everything that
Speaker 3: they could do. They at one point had double I
Speaker 3: had on double underwear, trying to make sure that the
Speaker 3: city and it just got swallowed up.
Speaker 4: Y'all.
Speaker 2: It is lucky.
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: I keep it from my mama.
Speaker 4: You do, you do? Definitely. Mimi's definitely stacked. Shout out Jamaica,
Speaker 4: Jamaica to the world, you know, But I'm not.
Speaker 1: It was just good to watch my family go out
Speaker 1: there and perform, Oh my god, and have fun before
Speaker 1: you were smiling the whole time, and you were cheesing,
Speaker 1: you were confident time in that space. I just those
Speaker 1: are my favorite moments.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 3: There's definitely some overlap favorite moments for sure. Kathy and
Speaker 3: Jonathan that that was a great Dead Ass Chord episode.
Speaker 2: It was so good.
Speaker 3: Another one of my favorite moments was us, well me saying,
Speaker 3: you know, I think we should do a thank you
Speaker 3: video to the crew facts and then talking to Joshua
Speaker 3: about it, and josh put that video together in like
Speaker 3: record time, which I appreciate. Found the song crew love,
Speaker 3: and I was like, oh, that's perfect, and then watching
Speaker 3: the video in that moment on the screen, but then
Speaker 3: also looking behind us and seeing our crew like kind
Speaker 3: of in the wings, watching it and watching them cry,
Speaker 3: and then I started crying. I'm like this, I knew,
Speaker 3: I knew it was going to be a moment, but
Speaker 3: I really wanted them, like I feel like we've never
Speaker 3: found ways to make sure that they understand, Like I
Speaker 3: don't think they fully understand how much we love and
Speaker 3: appreciate them, like we could not and would not want
Speaker 3: to do this without them. Every single one of them
Speaker 3: has been handpicked. So just watching their reaction to watching
Speaker 3: the video and then calling them up on stage and
Speaker 3: kind of having that final bowel moment with them was
Speaker 3: a favorite moment of mine. It's funny you mentioned my
Speaker 3: split being one of your favorite moments because we never
Speaker 3: see each other.
Speaker 2: When we do.
Speaker 3: Our look changes out of the Divusher and Beyonce or
Speaker 3: chaance costumes. I don't see you in your kind of
Speaker 3: fashion fit for the show until I.
Speaker 2: Hit the stage, and nor do you see me.
Speaker 3: And every single time I look over at you, I
Speaker 3: feel like I have to fight back a moment of
Speaker 3: tears too, because I'm just like wow, like look at
Speaker 3: my husband, like look at my life, look at what
Speaker 3: we are creating, look at how God is moving through
Speaker 3: us in this moment to be a vessel for people
Speaker 3: to take from our experience, our energy, our talks, our crew,
Speaker 3: whatever it is, taking away whatever it is that they need.
Speaker 3: And that's always Donora's prayer, which is another favorite moment
Speaker 3: of mine. We pray as a team before every single show,
Speaker 3: and one part that stands out in her prayer every
Speaker 3: time is that please Lord, in this moment, let everyone
Speaker 3: here in attendance take away whatever it is that they
Speaker 3: need in this moment to keep going. And that for
Speaker 3: me is like the most important part and it's one
Speaker 3: of my most favorite moments. And that's where we connect.
Speaker 3: You know, we connect so many dots. We connect the
Speaker 3: purpose of the show, you know, how we've arrived at
Speaker 3: the run of show.
Speaker 2: Then having everybody there.
Speaker 3: In the space with us and feeling that energy and
Speaker 3: then praying for what we want in that moment, for
Speaker 3: our crew and for our audience, and then feeling it
Speaker 3: in that moment alongside my husband and then my boys,
Speaker 3: Like my boys introducing me on stage is like the
Speaker 3: world's greatest mom in Atlanta.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that was Jackson And did you hear did you
Speaker 4: hear Kyro jump into World?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 3: And I heard all that backstage, and I'm just like, man,
Speaker 3: it was just like the compilations of everything that led
Speaker 3: me to that moment at the Atlanta show, Like it
Speaker 3: was so hard to pick a favorite moment, but it
Speaker 3: was just like the run of everything into that moment
Speaker 3: and then having Tyler Perry attend the show and just
Speaker 3: hearing him speak life into us and talk about the
Speaker 3: things that he loves and appreciates about us as individuals
Speaker 3: but also a couple.
Speaker 2: You know, so many friends and family.
Speaker 4: Cats from Zatima came out.
Speaker 1: Cam getting into town for it, Crystal who always supports
Speaker 1: people like people who expects to see certain people they
Speaker 1: know Crystal's going to be their support the way we
Speaker 1: support her. But it's like Trinity came out, give I
Speaker 1: came out, Cam came out, like you said, Tyler came out.
Speaker 1: It was it was amazing, freaking uh Gito flew in
Speaker 1: from La from l A just for the day to
Speaker 1: go check us like that.
Speaker 3: To Melyn freaking surprise, he brought my favorite chips. He
Speaker 3: was like, since I know you've been training and you've
Speaker 3: been working hard, you dropped some pounds, here's some chips.
Speaker 3: After the show. He and I love the same chip
Speaker 3: as a kettleis Jalepeno kettle chips, which we love, both
Speaker 3: of us.
Speaker 1: It was that, you know what to now I'm thinking
Speaker 1: about There's so many more moments I could think of,
Speaker 1: like our whole family being backstage at the Apollo signing
Speaker 1: the wall at the Apollo, like.
Speaker 4: You love that.
Speaker 3: There's like historic moments being like in those those stages,
Speaker 3: like all of our family backstage in Atlanta. They get
Speaker 3: a little overwhelming in Atlanta because there were so many
Speaker 3: people backstage before the show, but it was all love,
Speaker 3: like they were there to just like who needs what
Speaker 3: and what moment.
Speaker 2: Helping us with the kids.
Speaker 3: Like I'm literally putting eye drops in Jackson's eyes, like
Speaker 3: right before I hit the stage because I'm like, you
Speaker 3: gotta get his medicine.
Speaker 2: A seven thirty, Like you know, it's just it was
Speaker 2: just so many things.
Speaker 1: That's the funny part too, because I remember when you
Speaker 1: you went to go see Beyonce at in Sweden. Any
Speaker 1: went with Tyler, Yeah, and you in the box and
Speaker 1: jay Z was there in the box and he was
Speaker 1: holding Roomy and he.
Speaker 4: Was like, like devows, he's like such a dad.
Speaker 1: Yeah, He's like, he's just holding Roomy and panthers need
Speaker 1: to be changed and he's holding this one so this
Speaker 1: one can go.
Speaker 4: People are going to go back and look at us.
Speaker 1: And when it was like at the Apollo, do you
Speaker 1: remember when Kadeen was changing this one and Dakota needed
Speaker 1: this and then deval and got the Dakota had a
Speaker 1: breakdown in Atlanta because there's too many people and I
Speaker 1: run in there from my just you.
Speaker 2: Heard him cry.
Speaker 1: I'm crying and Daddy scooped him out, grabbed them up
Speaker 1: and I was like, give me my son, give me
Speaker 1: my son.
Speaker 4: And I took them back and calmed them down.
Speaker 1: But people don't understand we're entertainers, yes, but we're still
Speaker 1: also family people like parents, and.
Speaker 2: That's like precedents. I didn't even think about it.
Speaker 3: It's literally like I looked down at the clock from
Speaker 3: the makeup chair and I'm like, oh shit, Jackson gets
Speaker 3: his his eye drops and then he was getting his
Speaker 3: haircut by tip. I'm like, Jack's, what time did you
Speaker 3: get your eye drops last? He said two o'clock.
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, we almost twenty minutes behind schedule. So
Speaker 2: I just did that, and you know, it was just
Speaker 2: like she did.
Speaker 3: You know. My hairstylist was like you just like you
Speaker 3: just mom, Like you didn't even think about that, And
Speaker 3: she said, but it's crazy to see how like you're
Speaker 3: getting ready to perform in front of eighteen hundred.
Speaker 2: People and this what you guys thought about.
Speaker 3: And I'm like absolutely, Like it was just effortless, Like
Speaker 3: I don't even think about it.
Speaker 2: It's like that's just the priority. You know, those are.
Speaker 1: The moments, man, Like even even all of our cast
Speaker 1: and crew being at the Apollo, that is a historical
Speaker 1: place for great entertainers. We sold it out, not as
Speaker 1: a couple, we sold it out as a team. So
Speaker 1: now everyone can say, yo, I was a part of
Speaker 1: a team that sold out the Apollo. I was a
Speaker 1: part of the team that sold out Warner Warner is
Speaker 1: one of the last two places. I think Dave Chappelle
Speaker 1: did his. I forgot which tourter is. I'm gonna look
Speaker 1: it up. But these are historical theaters that greats have
Speaker 1: sold out.
Speaker 4: And on the wall. Because the Warner Theater was the
Speaker 4: one hundredth anniversary of the Warner Theater.
Speaker 3: They made us some beautiful T shirts too that said
Speaker 3: like Warner Theater, Dead Ass Podcast sold out.
Speaker 1: Of it opened nineteen twenty four, and in twenty twenty four,
Speaker 1: Dead Ass Podcast was one of the first people or
Speaker 1: productions to sell out Warner Theater.
Speaker 4: And one hundredth anniversary.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, because it's February. That's dope.
Speaker 1: But I mean, like, think about that. We're all a
Speaker 1: part of history. That to me is also a moment
Speaker 1: that I'll never ever forget. You can't take that moment
Speaker 1: away from me.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 4: My whole family was at the Apollo.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and we signed Yo. Signing the wall of the
Speaker 1: Apollo was freaking amazing.
Speaker 4: It's just there's so.
Speaker 1: Many moments I can't even count down because now that
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about, I'm like, shoot, how could that not
Speaker 1: be in my top three?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 2: How could exactly?
Speaker 3: And then just some of a BTS favorite moment of
Speaker 3: mine is just like being on the tour bus with
Speaker 3: the crew, arriving at hotels together, we stop at the bar,
Speaker 3: have a drink. Tiff is always going to buy us
Speaker 3: a drink. She's just like, yeah, y'all need this to
Speaker 3: kind of, you know, decompress real quick.
Speaker 1: Being late to the airport in Dallas and Janelle getting
Speaker 1: the wheelchair and being like I got us and flying
Speaker 1: through the airport so that we could get to the gate.
Speaker 4: On times we can get to Dallas. Those are times.
Speaker 2: That so many laughs like y'all have no idea.
Speaker 3: They don't have no idea, so many labs from the
Speaker 3: tour bus to traveling together, to squeezing into ubers, to
Speaker 3: leaving people bags behind, like it's just crazy.
Speaker 1: Putting most of the team that's from Atlanta on a
Speaker 1: private jet to fly most of them, most of them
Speaker 1: had never been on a private jet, and we were
Speaker 1: able to provide that for our team for an experience
Speaker 1: like that's just these are moments that that I can't
Speaker 1: even put them in order.
Speaker 4: I can't even put them there.
Speaker 1: It felt good to be able to provide that for
Speaker 1: everyone the same way Tyler provided it for us and
Speaker 1: for many people who don't know. When you see certain things,
Speaker 1: it becomes real for you and you're like, man, that
Speaker 1: black man was able to do that for us. He
Speaker 1: put our whole cast during the quarantine on private jets
Speaker 1: to fly safely from Atlanta from LA to Atlanta.
Speaker 4: To do Season two.
Speaker 1: And I was like, man, that's dope that he can
Speaker 1: do that and put all of us young kids on
Speaker 1: a private jet. And I said, you know, at some
Speaker 1: point I want to be able to put my family
Speaker 1: and my team on a private jet. And two years ago,
Speaker 1: when we first started working with said I told Sad,
Speaker 1: I said, Yo, it's sad.
Speaker 4: At some point you're gonna be picking us up.
Speaker 2: He reminded me of that. Yeah, he reminded you of that.
Speaker 1: Reminded me that, He said, d you remember you said
Speaker 1: that you I was gonna be picking you up from
Speaker 1: a private jet. He said, I'm headed to Teeterborough to
Speaker 1: pick y'all up. That was only two years ago.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I can't. I don't have a top.
Speaker 1: Three no more, because those are all moments that when
Speaker 1: you hugged me, When you hugged me getting on the jet,
Speaker 1: and then you looked at me and you said, babe,
Speaker 1: like like we're doing it.
Speaker 4: That's one of my favorite moments.
Speaker 1: I'm doing it with my best friend and then all
Speaker 1: my friends is around me, Like I get to sit
Speaker 1: in the.
Speaker 4: Back of the chair with Matt be like, yo, mad,
Speaker 4: look at this shit.
Speaker 2: It's crazy. Everybody has a little photo moments.
Speaker 3: We had a nice meal on the jet and then
Speaker 3: our kids are there, Like it's so important for us
Speaker 3: for our kids to be when they're with us, especially
Speaker 3: on tour, that they feel like they're amongst family, Like
Speaker 3: I can leave and be on stage to perform for
Speaker 3: all of you, but know that backstage, whether it's Shreija
Speaker 3: now whoever.
Speaker 2: Like they're good.
Speaker 3: They were like aunties and uncles. Like it's an extension
Speaker 3: of us and that trust that we've built and that
Speaker 3: loyalty and that vibe, that energy, that positivity. That love
Speaker 3: is something that cannot be duplicated. It cannot be duplicated.
Speaker 3: So shout out to our favorite tour moments. Love against
Speaker 3: the world, love within our world. It's something that's going
Speaker 3: to definitely go down for us in our history books.
Speaker 3: Twenty two years together, so much accomplished. This is definitely
Speaker 3: a highlight for sure, one of the best tours, actually.
Speaker 2: The best tour so far. All Right, y'all, let's go ahead.
Speaker 3: And take a quick break and we will be back
Speaker 3: with listener letters. Alrighty, listener letter time, we are back
Speaker 3: for the last portion of the show.
Speaker 2: Do you want to and dive in baby and read first?
Speaker 4: I like to dive in, Hey, Kadeen in devowed.
Speaker 1: This letter is aimed mainly towards Kadean, but would also
Speaker 1: love for Davou's input. My husband and I have been
Speaker 1: together for seven years since ages twenty and twenty one,
Speaker 1: married for two years, and recently had a baby. We
Speaker 1: are still in the building phase of our relationship to
Speaker 1: become financially secure. It's a great thing. We actually like
Speaker 1: each other because, oh child, this is a rough with
Speaker 1: all of the sacrificing. Anyway, we've been there before. I'm
Speaker 1: saying me and Kadeen have been waiting before it should
Speaker 1: write that. Anyway, I feel as if I'm doubtful of
Speaker 1: the future, realizing that I can't have it all. I
Speaker 1: know that for my kids I want to be able
Speaker 1: to present for all. I want to be present for
Speaker 1: all of the events, and with my career I can
Speaker 1: do so. But I feel as if I'll be leaving
Speaker 1: so much money on the table, nurses can get a bag.
Speaker 1: I have prayed and worked for the career that I
Speaker 1: have as well as a provider husband. That's one of
Speaker 1: his main aspirations in life. But now as it's getting
Speaker 1: closer to becoming reality, I feel like, what about me?
Speaker 1: What about my career? If you feel comfortable enough to answer,
Speaker 1: could you do? Could you do so to the best
Speaker 1: of your ability? Have you ever felt this way? Thank
Speaker 1: you both for the community you have built.
Speaker 3: Gotcha so you want? She I'm trying to everything.
Speaker 1: She's working towards being helping her husband be financially secure.
Speaker 2: As a nurse, which I guess bags be there.
Speaker 1: And she's like, I want the bag, but she feels
Speaker 1: like she misses out on the family stuff, right, And
Speaker 1: she's like, how does she figure out?
Speaker 2: Well, you know, I could definitely relate to that.
Speaker 3: That's how I felt when we were back in Brooklyn
Speaker 3: and you retired from the NFL.
Speaker 2: You want to start your business when it.
Speaker 3: Came to the gym and all that, and you had
Speaker 3: to be a stay at home dad for a bit
Speaker 3: because I had to work to keep the health insurance
Speaker 3: going and of course, bringing money to give my portion
Speaker 3: towards whatever we needed to sustain in each other. But
Speaker 3: the good thing about Deval and I is that we
Speaker 3: had a plan. I knew that was a temporary situation
Speaker 3: because I expressed to Devou how important it was for
Speaker 3: me to want to be there.
Speaker 2: For our family.
Speaker 3: Say that again, I expressed to Devow how important it
Speaker 3: was for me to be present for my family, for
Speaker 3: him as a wife, and for my son as a
Speaker 3: new mom. So when recently having a baby, I completely
Speaker 3: understand how you feel, because that mom guilt is something
Speaker 3: that really really lays on heavy when you feel like
Speaker 3: you're not present and you're missing those moments. And thankfully
Speaker 3: I had Deval, who was a super hands on dad
Speaker 3: who at the time, you had your own struggles feeling like, man,
Speaker 3: I don't want my wife to have to do this, No,
Speaker 3: that's what I want, That's.
Speaker 2: Not what she wanted.
Speaker 3: But you also supported me in that you were like,
Speaker 3: this is what we need in a temporary moment for
Speaker 3: our family. So you did what you were best equipped
Speaker 3: to doing that moment, which was take care of our
Speaker 3: son while I worked at home. But I knew that
Speaker 3: it was temporary, so after discussing with you what I
Speaker 3: wanted and where I expected for our lives to go,
Speaker 3: because I wanted to be at home more.
Speaker 2: That's when you worked towards it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, the good thing with your baby being young and
Speaker 3: deval actually gave me this perspective early on when we
Speaker 3: first had Jackson and when like our chir and casts
Speaker 3: came around and they were younger.
Speaker 2: Sometimes you have.
Speaker 3: To sacrifice time at home with the children when they're
Speaker 3: younger to be able to build, and to be able
Speaker 3: to stack some money, and to be able to really
Speaker 3: go hard in the moments that they may not remember.
Speaker 3: So when your baby is one and two and even
Speaker 3: three years old, those first three years of life, grind,
Speaker 3: do what you gotta do, take that extra shift, build
Speaker 3: because it's going to give you later on the autonomy
Speaker 3: over your life and time that you want. So by
Speaker 3: putting in that sacrificial portion early when your baby may
Speaker 3: not be able to remember it, it's gonna set you
Speaker 3: up to be ahead in the long run. And that's
Speaker 3: something that you taught me because I felt like, man,
Speaker 3: I'm missing everything.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: But the good thing with being a nurse is that
Speaker 3: there's flexibility. You can work per dim you can pick
Speaker 3: up shifts here and there, because I know you want
Speaker 3: to still be a contributor to your family and that's
Speaker 3: important to you. So in terms of having it all,
Speaker 3: there is a way to have it all. You may
Speaker 3: not have it all in that moment, but by making
Speaker 3: those little steps and working towards it and having those
Speaker 3: conversations with your husband and letting him know how you
Speaker 3: feel and the things that you want and desire, and
Speaker 3: making a plan, you can eventually get those things that
Speaker 3: you want.
Speaker 4: I have nothing.
Speaker 1: So I'm going to go ahead and read this second
Speaker 1: question because you literally answered it the exact same way
Speaker 1: I was going to answer it. I was just going
Speaker 1: to tell her that if you feel this way, express
Speaker 1: it first to your husband. You to create a plan
Speaker 1: so that you can eventually move out of that space
Speaker 1: when the children are old enough to remember.
Speaker 4: Because that's what we did.
Speaker 2: That's literally what we did.
Speaker 4: I have you crush that. Give me some all right?
Speaker 2: Thanks? I read let one since you okay, go for it,
Speaker 2: go for it.
Speaker 1: And baby, you got it, says trust me, you got it.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, make a plan with your husband.
Speaker 4: Y'all. Only two years in the.
Speaker 3: Marriage, so yeah, two years in seven years together, you're
Speaker 3: still living twenty Yeah, that sounds like literally de Valinize
Speaker 3: at age twenty seven to twenty eight, just married, trying
Speaker 3: to figure things out. The way you start in your
Speaker 3: twenties is not how you're going to finish later on.
Speaker 3: So good luck to y'all.
Speaker 1: Talk about babies, I'm talking about I got nothing that
Speaker 1: was great, awesome?
Speaker 4: What though? This person must be from Detroit, Kadeen and Daval.
Speaker 1: I just want to start by saying, I'm so happy
Speaker 1: I started watching your videos. I've been with you guys
Speaker 1: since the beginning. Your content is so relatable and I
Speaker 1: love it. I love your transparency, the knowledge that you
Speaker 1: both spew on the podcast and zach on sisters then
Speaker 1: as Atima.
Speaker 5: Love it now.
Speaker 1: I'm not asking for advice, just some inspiration. I've made
Speaker 1: major changes in my life, getting myself in the gym
Speaker 1: and working with a personal trainer four days a week
Speaker 1: real consistent since December, talking with a therapist, enrolled in
Speaker 1: real estate classes, and trying to advance in my career,
Speaker 1: just to name a few. But I'm a single mom
Speaker 1: who works two jobs, who loves her kids and never
Speaker 1: stops with gentle hands in the heart of a fighter.
Speaker 4: That's what's up with.
Speaker 1: Gentle hands and heart, and I love every single mom
Speaker 1: never starts with gentle hands in the heart of a fire.
Speaker 4: That's dope. I'm a survivor.
Speaker 1: Yes, I sang Reba as I typedd. I'm thirty seven
Speaker 1: from Detroit. I do you for the d with an
Speaker 1: almost fifteen year old daughter. Trying to date has been awful.
Speaker 1: Guys assume that I'm just so busy, and don't get
Speaker 1: me wrong, I am at times, but between both jobs, class,
Speaker 1: my baby, her basketball or volleyball practices, games, and more,
Speaker 1: I can still find or make time for myself and
Speaker 1: what I want to do. I have made myself available
Speaker 1: just to be stood up or ghosted. I'm tired, but
Speaker 1: I'm really tired of being an amazing, dope, funny ass,
Speaker 1: funny as fuck, lonely person. I'm ready to throw in
Speaker 1: the towel and quit. I try not to allow those
Speaker 1: things to break me, but I'm cracking. Any words of
Speaker 1: encouragement to not give up will be welcome with an
Speaker 1: open heart.
Speaker 4: Thank you in advanced stay blessed.
Speaker 3: You know what I love how she started that whole thing.
Speaker 3: She is working on herself.
Speaker 4: That's all she got to keep doing.
Speaker 3: Keep doing that, keep working on yourself. When you are
Speaker 3: the best version of yourself, you will be happier. That's
Speaker 3: the energy that you're going to present to the world,
Speaker 3: and whoever is deserving of receiving you at your best
Speaker 3: will come.
Speaker 2: It's not your time, sis, it's God's time.
Speaker 4: You fucking on one today.
Speaker 2: Once a day you are well, thank you.
Speaker 3: But the sooner you believe wholeheartedly that things that you
Speaker 3: want in this moment are only deferred to a greater moment.
Speaker 3: When you can receive it fully, with a full heart
Speaker 3: and with a completely happy spirit, that's when it's gonna
Speaker 3: happen for you.
Speaker 2: So keep going, don't stop, don't stop.
Speaker 1: If you'd like to be featured as one of our
Speaker 1: listener let us email us at dead ass Advice at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com.
Speaker 2: I've given all the advice and the team. You know
Speaker 2: what I'm saying, take you to leave it.
Speaker 3: But it's just how I feel like I and it's
Speaker 3: like I'm talking to myself, like literally when we have
Speaker 3: these questions.
Speaker 2: Sometimes there's so many relatable moments.
Speaker 3: In the listener letters because we've either been there, have
Speaker 3: felt that, have experienced that still experience it twenty two
Speaker 3: years and feel it as an individual, feel it as
Speaker 3: a spouse, feel it as a parent, like we relate
Speaker 3: to you guys so much, so much so I feel
Speaker 3: it because I keep telling myself the same thing.
Speaker 2: And at forty I'm still working on myself.
Speaker 1: She said that she's thirty seven doing all of this stuff.
Speaker 1: I've watched this woman here next to me now at
Speaker 1: forty walk into who she is thirty seven year Oldadan,
Speaker 1: You wouldn't been able to give these answers, But it
Speaker 1: seems that over the last couple of years, if you
Speaker 1: continue to work on yourself, but also you've realized that
Speaker 1: I'm not having any more kids, you've been in tune
Speaker 1: with yourself.
Speaker 4: Yes, I have nothing to add to that.
Speaker 2: Like birth control. Yes, of somewhat down time.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because these kids will drive you crazy and a
Speaker 4: husband will drive you crazy.
Speaker 2: I'll be driving on crazy in the best way.
Speaker 1: But no, I agree with everything you said. I really
Speaker 1: have nothing to add like this. In God's time, And
Speaker 1: if you're looking to be featured as one of our
Speaker 1: listeners letters, be sure to email us at D A
Speaker 1: D E A D A S S A D V
Speaker 1: I C e at gmail dot com.
Speaker 3: As right, y'all, it's dead ass Advice at gmail dot com.
Speaker 3: Moment of Truth time, we recap some of our most
Speaker 3: favorite moments of the Love Against the World Tour. Put
Speaker 3: your moment of truth, baby.
Speaker 1: My moment of truth is. I can't wind down the
Speaker 1: tour to a few moments. I could do a few
Speaker 1: moments at each stop. I could do a few moments
Speaker 1: at rehearsal. I can do a few moments with discussion.
Speaker 1: Josh was just talking to us about how we came
Speaker 1: up with the idea. He said, de where was your mind?
Speaker 1: Remember we were on a group text. It was me, you, Matt,
Speaker 1: Josh Donor, and we were like, what are we going
Speaker 1: to call this tour?
Speaker 4: And I was like, I got it.
Speaker 1: We're gonna call it the Love Against the World Tour yep,
Speaker 1: and we're gonna do a Love against the World doc.
Speaker 4: And then it was like boom.
Speaker 1: The whole team got in motion, and then it was
Speaker 1: just like boom, Matt, capture content, Boom, Josh, let's go
Speaker 1: edit content.
Speaker 4: Let's let I just I don't have a moment of truth.
Speaker 4: My moments of truths are The.
Speaker 1: Love Against the World Tour was everything I wanted it
Speaker 1: to be, and it was because I got through it.
Speaker 4: My love of my life, my sons, and my best friends.
Speaker 3: I love that and I can echo the same sentiments.
Speaker 3: My moment of truth time is that with each stop
Speaker 3: rounding out in Atlanta amongst family, friends, an amazing crowd
Speaker 3: almost eight thousand, seven hundred people who attended in all,
Speaker 3: over eight thousand.
Speaker 4: Seven hundred people, eighty four hundred.
Speaker 2: I cannot wholeheartedly say that this may be my last.
Speaker 5: Now I might be speaking on a high and she
Speaker 5: ain't need to smoke it.
Speaker 2: This don't hold me to it.
Speaker 3: But my hard no for wanting to just really phase
Speaker 3: out the live show.
Speaker 2: For us.
Speaker 3: Seeing people in real time in person. And I say
Speaker 3: this at every show, like this is y'all's show, this
Speaker 3: is not me and devout show being in that space
Speaker 3: and filing you guys as energy and that the gratitude
Speaker 3: and the love, and it makes me feel like like
Speaker 3: why stop?
Speaker 2: Like we are.
Speaker 3: Literally giving people love within our world that we've created
Speaker 3: for them.
Speaker 4: So you know, listening to you right now, you need
Speaker 4: to do your own thing.
Speaker 2: What do you mean.
Speaker 1: You need to have your own Like I could see
Speaker 1: a day with a day with K where you go
Speaker 1: out on tour and you speak and it's your perspective,
Speaker 1: not your perspective tied to me.
Speaker 4: Just your perspective.
Speaker 2: A day with let us know what.
Speaker 4: You'll, let us know what you're thinking about it.
Speaker 1: If Kay, if K did a day with K and
Speaker 1: she went and in person, like an intimate in person
Speaker 1: place where you because hearing you answer these questions for
Speaker 1: these young women, right, it was insightful and eye opening
Speaker 1: to me, as your husband, of how your perspective has
Speaker 1: changed from for sure know you so to me, it's
Speaker 1: like them, I would I would be interested to see
Speaker 1: how women would take to hearing you speak on your
Speaker 1: own without being connected to me.
Speaker 2: That's I think. I think that would be dope.
Speaker 1: And listening to you answer these questions, it was like,
Speaker 1: I feel like I would be doing you a disservice
Speaker 1: if I answer, if I added anything to it, and
Speaker 1: hearing you say that you are continuing to do more, right,
Speaker 1: maybe that's what it is what it looks like. You know,
Speaker 1: they don't have to be a big venue.
Speaker 3: I want to do something more because I wanted to
Speaker 3: be like close to y'all and see everybody and see
Speaker 3: faces and talk, and.
Speaker 4: I don't know. I think I think, I think that's
Speaker 4: I think that's I wonder.
Speaker 2: If we're onto something here. I said he'd be coming
Speaker 2: up with ideas out of nowhere.
Speaker 4: I can see things. Literally, you crushed both of these questions.
Speaker 4: I got up. To be honest, I was like, wow,
Speaker 4: like that was actually fucking dope, right.
Speaker 3: I mean, I was just thinking about it if I
Speaker 3: was in these shoes, because I have been in those shoes.
Speaker 4: I want to see you do your own thing.
Speaker 2: Right, Like we said, God's timing.
Speaker 3: Like I talk about having a daytime talk show, right,
Speaker 3: Maybe I could have had one in my thirties, But
Speaker 3: would it have been as impactful because I haven't.
Speaker 4: You've lived.
Speaker 3: You got to live a little bit more, you know,
Speaker 3: And which makes me think a lot of women who
Speaker 3: do have their own daytime talk shows are a little
Speaker 3: bit farther into their life.
Speaker 2: Maybe for these fifties.
Speaker 4: You know, you've accomplished.
Speaker 1: Podcaster, you're a New York Times bestselling author, your mother
Speaker 1: to four boys, you've been a wife to an NFL
Speaker 1: athlete and actor.
Speaker 2: Let us know what y'all think, Baby, would you come
Speaker 2: see me on tour?
Speaker 4: I know?
Speaker 2: Now, let's just know that out.
Speaker 4: Let trouble know.
Speaker 2: Let trible know what TBD TBD. All right, y'all.
Speaker 3: If you haven't yet, Patreon is where it's at, y'all.
Speaker 3: We keep trying to tell you. Shout out to our
Speaker 3: Patreon gang who came in their yellow who loved on
Speaker 3: us at the live shows. You can see exclusive dead
Speaker 3: Ass podcast content there as well as more Ellis Family content.
Speaker 3: Will be sure to keep that coming to you even
Speaker 3: once the tour has died down. More all day care
Speaker 3: content as well will be there, and you can follow
Speaker 3: us on social media if you have not yet dead
Speaker 3: Ass the Podcast or is it just said as podcast
Speaker 3: the podcast and I'm Kadina, I am.
Speaker 1: And I am Devo And make sure you get your
Speaker 1: copy of We Over Me, the count Intuitive approach to
Speaker 1: getting everything you want out of your relationship. And if
Speaker 1: you're listening on Apple Podcasts, be sure to rate, review,
Speaker 1: and subscribe.
Speaker 3: Dead Ass, We Love y'all, Love against the World, Baby period.
Speaker 1: Dead Ass is a production of iHeartMedia podcast Network and
Speaker 1: it's produced by Donorpina and Triple. Follow the podcast on
Speaker 1: social media at dead Ass the Podcast and Never Miss
Speaker 1: a Thing