Speaker 1: We still never determined what non binary wizards are calling. Well,
Speaker 1: we're about to have a whole podcast talking about Harry Potter,
Speaker 1: so well, I think there needs to be you know,
Speaker 1: an x in there somewhere you know magic or its
Speaker 1: magic c x N. Just I wanted to be as
Speaker 1: difficult to say as Yeah, Rose, Rose, Rose Rose. Our
Speaker 1: first episode of the podcast. Oh my god, this is
Speaker 1: so exciting. I feel like reaching the let's make a
Speaker 1: podcast stage of our friendship is it's really a rite
Speaker 1: of passage. Yeah, But also I feel like the let's
Speaker 1: make a podcast stage of our friendship was our entire friends.
Speaker 1: We're just like, how can we capitalize off of our
Speaker 1: deep connection and intellect and humor? Are witticisms and cultural knowledge?
Speaker 1: Should we introduce ourselves? I feel like y'all know who
Speaker 1: we are. But I am frand to Ron and I'm
Speaker 1: Rose damn you and this is like a virgin our
Speaker 1: new podcast that you were listening to for the first time.
Speaker 1: Isn't that amazing? You are so lucky you, You are
Speaker 1: so lucky and so special, and I love you for
Speaker 1: listening to this podcast. You were talking the way Oprah
Speaker 1: talked to Gaga right after she did with holding her shoulders.
Speaker 1: No one does that. Um like a virgin is really
Speaker 1: our friendship in podcast form because there has been this
Speaker 1: trope in our friendship where I will, you know, like
Speaker 1: mention something like a movie or a TV show or
Speaker 1: like a cultural phenomenon. I'll be like, oh, scream like
Speaker 1: at that, and I'm like, oh, I've never seen that. Yes,
Speaker 1: And during the pandemic especially, I feel like we spent
Speaker 1: so much time introducing each other to pieces of pop
Speaker 1: culture that like the other one loved. I think it
Speaker 1: was more like me force feeding you pop culture. I
Speaker 1: will say it was a mixed bad because some of
Speaker 1: these things where I was like, wow, I can't believe
Speaker 1: I've gone this long without seeing the Elvira movie, and
Speaker 1: then with things like Twilight, it's like I very proactively
Speaker 1: have not been watching this and by choice, and then
Speaker 1: you tape my eyes open. I think that dynamic is
Speaker 1: like pretty emblematic of like the very different ways that
Speaker 1: like you and I grew up, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I think that was like kind of slutely. That's like
Speaker 1: something that came through as we were like you know,
Speaker 1: in the pandemic, like months and months just like vegging
Speaker 1: out ordering really bad pizza because we're in Los Angeles
Speaker 1: and cannot do pizza. Um, discovering that you know, you
Speaker 1: really have like an unfettered cultural like encyclopedia, especially when
Speaker 1: it comes to like cult classics and like queer gay
Speaker 1: kind of like canon stuff, and you were super sheltered
Speaker 1: and didn't consume any of that. Actually, yeah, maybe that's
Speaker 1: helpful context. Okay, So like I don't want to get
Speaker 1: too deep into it, but like just the gist of
Speaker 1: like baby Fran and how I grew up up until
Speaker 1: maybe like my freshman year of high school a total
Speaker 1: Jesus freak okay, like purchased Jesus themed shirts at the
Speaker 1: Family Christian bookstore had the where you jerking it to Jesus.
Speaker 1: I don't recall actually ever jerking it to Jesus, but
Speaker 1: I definitely have been aroused by biblical cartoons and the
Speaker 1: Prince of Egypt. Hello Everyone's erotic Awakening. But like literally
Speaker 1: like the w W j D bracelet, like I listened
Speaker 1: to like Reliant Kay and switch Foot, and like only
Speaker 1: listened to Christian music. I went to church two to
Speaker 1: three times a week. I wanted to be a Jesus
Speaker 1: Camp counselor. I went to Jesus Camp seven years in
Speaker 1: a row. Like I there was nothing that could like
Speaker 1: throw me from the dedication I had to our Lord
Speaker 1: and Xavior Jesus Christ, except of course, when I realized
Speaker 1: that I like to have sex with men um and
Speaker 1: that kind of I was just like, oh, actually this
Speaker 1: is fine, and I'm kind of over it. Um. But
Speaker 1: that was how I grew up. And because of that,
Speaker 1: my parents, like all my family fundamentalist Christians, really like
Speaker 1: sheltered me from the rest of like mainstream culture, with
Speaker 1: a few like weird exceptions that we'll get into at
Speaker 1: another time, but like most for the most part, I
Speaker 1: grew up in a cultural vacuum. And so I didn't
Speaker 1: know who the Spice Girls were, and I didn't know
Speaker 1: that scream was a thing. In fact, I wasn't even
Speaker 1: allowed to watch any of the horror any horror genre
Speaker 1: stuff at all. How did you grow up? Bros Well?
Speaker 1: I think that my cultural knowledge is partially the product
Speaker 1: of um, a lack of supervision. UM. I'm a child
Speaker 1: of divorce and I have younger siblings, so especially in
Speaker 1: my formative years when I was a teenager, I just
Speaker 1: kind of like had the read them to do whatever
Speaker 1: I wanted to and consume whatever I wanted to do
Speaker 1: with like very little parental oversight, and that meant a
Speaker 1: lot of exploration on the Internet. I was also very
Speaker 1: much like an indoor kid, very Matilda energy. I was
Speaker 1: a big reader very early, and then that segued very
Speaker 1: organically to the Internet, and I discovered fandom and fan
Speaker 1: fiction like pretty young and just kind of like consumed
Speaker 1: every kind of pop culture I wanted to and was
Speaker 1: very obsessive. You know what's so funny is like reading
Speaker 1: is really the gateway drug to corrupting all these kids,
Speaker 1: because I don't know what your parents were like, but
Speaker 1: my parents were like, you can't watch this, you can't
Speaker 1: go to this, you can't do this, you can't have
Speaker 1: slumber parties. But they were like, oh, if you're gonna
Speaker 1: go read a book, like reading is just good for everybody.
Speaker 1: You can get anything. Nothing bad happens in books, nothing
Speaker 1: bad happened. Then I would be like, literally, you know,
Speaker 1: in like the y a section, finding every book that
Speaker 1: had like a very a grazing, eclipsing sex scene in it,
Speaker 1: and like I don't know, pulling my page. Um, but
Speaker 1: I feel like that I have to say I hate
Speaker 1: that phrase, slow my page? What what do you what
Speaker 1: do you hate about it? It just doesn't sing to
Speaker 1: my ears? What what would what would you prefer? I say,
Speaker 1: I'm jerking off, jerking mas masturbating. Um I loved in
Speaker 1: in Spencer when when Kristin Sewart says, can you leave,
Speaker 1: I'd like to masturbate again? Just solidifying it in the
Speaker 1: lesbian cannon. We will be talking about Spencer today. UM.
Speaker 1: I think part of the reason why our friendship works
Speaker 1: is that we're coming from these two very different point
Speaker 1: of views, but also are unified in our obsessive love
Speaker 1: of the things that we love and our desire to
Speaker 1: share those things with the people we love. Yeah, Like,
Speaker 1: one of my biggest love languages is like, if I
Speaker 1: love something, I really want all my loved ones to
Speaker 1: experience it with me, honestly at associopathic level, Like if
Speaker 1: you watch like an episode of your Hostice of Everly
Speaker 1: Hills and you don't tell me, like, I'll be sad,
Speaker 1: yes that that has happened, probably probably pretty recently. And
Speaker 1: also you know, our text chain is like do you
Speaker 1: want to go to the movies tonight? So we can
Speaker 1: see this movie together because we have to see it together,
Speaker 1: although under penalty of death. And that is the energy
Speaker 1: that we're going to bring to this podcast. We are
Speaker 1: going to be introducing each other to these formative pieces
Speaker 1: of media, and if not you know, introducing, I think
Speaker 1: at least introducing the other person to a different part
Speaker 1: of it or a different like point of view on it.
Speaker 1: And sometimes we will be joined by guests who will
Speaker 1: aid one of us in force feeding the other some
Speaker 1: some piece of media or maybe neither of us have
Speaker 1: watched end. Our guest is going to come in and say, hey,
Speaker 1: y'all are missing out on X, Y and Z, and
Speaker 1: I think, you know, and the visions in the in
Speaker 1: the world of like a Virgin don't always have to
Speaker 1: be us. Sometimes they will be you, our listeners, and
Speaker 1: you will experience whatever we're talking about for the first time. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think that if there's one thing that like we
Speaker 1: want people to take away from this podcast, aside from,
Speaker 1: you know, a showcasing of our friendship and our witticism.
Speaker 1: I wasn't reaching out for you to hold my hand.
Speaker 1: I was just stretching right. I will reach out to
Speaker 1: grab Rose's hand and she wasn't reaching from my att
Speaker 1: she was just stretching. And this that is our friendship
Speaker 1: in a nutshell, Oh my god. What you can expect
Speaker 1: from every episode is that, you know, we'll start off
Speaker 1: talking about what's going on in the world, what's going
Speaker 1: on in pop culture. Then we'll get into our main discussion,
Speaker 1: whether it's like a book, a movie, um an era,
Speaker 1: an album, and then we'll you know, finish it off
Speaker 1: with like a a fun little game or like a
Speaker 1: prompt or something. Will change it up, will change it up,
Speaker 1: fran Yeah, I think that one of the things people
Speaker 1: will begin to understand about this podcast is that this
Speaker 1: podcast is hosted by a Glinda and an Alphaba. Jadis.
Speaker 1: Can y'all guess who who is who? I don't. I
Speaker 1: don't think it will take a mastermind to or or
Speaker 1: really even listening to the whole episode to figure out
Speaker 1: that I am the Alphaba. Fran is the Glinda. That's right, Alfie.
Speaker 1: I do not quite have like the register that Christian
Speaker 1: China with possesses, but you know I can sell it.
Speaker 1: You'll get there. I should actually be practicing the new
Speaker 1: canon Glinda, which is someone who's who's gonna mumble a
Speaker 1: little bit maybe say yeah, I can't do it. In
Speaker 1: case you've been living under a rock, last week it
Speaker 1: was a announced that the Wicked movie, which I still
Speaker 1: don't believe is actually happening, has found its leading ladies
Speaker 1: in Ariana Grande and Cynthia Arrivo. Cynthia Rivo is amazing.
Speaker 1: I'm also really happy that a black woman is playing Alphaba.
Speaker 1: I'm also grateful that someone's playing Alphaba who will actually
Speaker 1: hit the note into buying gravity. I am really looking
Speaker 1: forward to Ariana in a blonde ponytail um, appearing in
Speaker 1: a bubble and going the Wicked Witch of the West
Speaker 1: is dead. Yeah, she's such a theater gay. Like she
Speaker 1: is such a theater gay. Well, I mean, there was
Speaker 1: that tweet of hers that people were retweeting about how
Speaker 1: she wanted to play Glinda one day in two thousand eleven,
Speaker 1: but also you know she'd wanted Alphaba. No, she did
Speaker 1: the Wizard and I on that Wicked TV tribute a
Speaker 1: couple of years ago. And I don't think that you're
Speaker 1: Ariana Grande getting cast in a Wicket movie, and don't
Speaker 1: like think of the possibility that you could play Alphaba.
Speaker 1: But I really like that because I think wanting to
Speaker 1: be the star is very Glinda energy. It is so
Speaker 1: so she will bring that to the role. And let's say,
Speaker 1: you know, Wicked is even though it's alphabets story, like
Speaker 1: they are kind of co leads, even though Alphabet has
Speaker 1: more songs. Yeah, I am honestly just here for an
Speaker 1: era where in Ari is trying to be in movies
Speaker 1: because she was rumored for like Meg and Hercules, She's
Speaker 1: been rumored for, like other casting opportunities. I feel like
Speaker 1: she's trying to do what Gaga is trying to do,
Speaker 1: which is what share did you know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: I think they're all trying to do the pop start
Speaker 1: to like actress pipeline. But does that mean we're going
Speaker 1: to get you know, serious press tour Ariana Grande in
Speaker 1: a bunch of you know, like of ugly pink dresses
Speaker 1: if it ever happens, because she does not do good
Speaker 1: red carpet. Look. I love Arianna, don't come from me stands,
Speaker 1: but she does not usually serve on the red carpet
Speaker 1: or you know, there's going to be a green carpet
Speaker 1: at the premier. I I'm excited for the tour. I personally,
Speaker 1: I'm a big um John, I'm Chew fan, Like I
Speaker 1: love crazy rich Asians. I think that like his style
Speaker 1: of directing is kind of like I hate that I'm
Speaker 1: saying this, but like he's doing what like Basilerman used
Speaker 1: to do with like maximalism and like sense like that
Speaker 1: this kind of sensational like big like I think that
Speaker 1: saying he's doing what Basilerman used to do. Well, Basilerman
Speaker 1: doesn't make movies anymore, No, but Basilerman is what he
Speaker 1: does is nowhere near as stylized as what Basilerman did. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: I'm excited to see what he does with Wicked, But
Speaker 1: I also have to say that the people that have
Speaker 1: this adaptation in their hands have a huge responsibility because
Speaker 1: we waited two decades now for this to be solidified,
Speaker 1: and if it is postponed any longer, days will riot
Speaker 1: in the streets, there will be an uprising. Well, there's
Speaker 1: lots of other movies that actually have come out, and
Speaker 1: we have seen a bunch of them, all of them.
Speaker 1: We have nothing to do. Yeah, well, we're also in
Speaker 1: prime movie going season. Last week we saw Dune. Um, well, okay, subjective,
Speaker 1: I saw Dune France. Slept through most of Dune. Okay,
Speaker 1: we we got blitzed, dear audience, we got we got
Speaker 1: very stowed. Um. I kept hitting my vape in the bathroom.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. It's a movie about a space twink
Speaker 1: that everyone wants to fuck and it can't be interpreted
Speaker 1: as anything else. No. Um. I also did love the
Speaker 1: very like boring modern names that all of these space
Speaker 1: here has had, Lady Jessica Paul, there was a guy
Speaker 1: whose last name was Idaho. It was just like weird,
Speaker 1: like come on over here, Brad Jake. Yeah. It's also
Speaker 1: a heartwarming road trip story about a boy and his mom. Wait,
Speaker 1: they go on a road trip. Yes, you were asleep,
Speaker 1: fully asleep. Look the recliners that the a m C.
Speaker 1: Universal Those are some nice chairs. They hit well. One
Speaker 1: movie that you didn't sleep through that we also saw
Speaker 1: this weekend was Spencer, starring Kristen Stewart. And let me
Speaker 1: tell you my expectations for this film. We're kind of
Speaker 1: low not to be a total bitch about it too late.
Speaker 1: And I don't say that to like Meg Kristen Stewart,
Speaker 1: but I am not like a twin Hard and I'm
Speaker 1: not like a a case do writer die? And so
Speaker 1: you're not a Chrismian. I'm not a chrisbian. Um, that's
Speaker 1: what we call ourselves. I am not a Chrisbian. And
Speaker 1: I went into this movie with no expectations and I
Speaker 1: left really loving what I saw with a handful of exceptions.
Speaker 1: What did you think? I loved it. I thought it
Speaker 1: was so beautiful. I thought Kristen was incredible. She will
Speaker 1: win the Oscar. I think she'll be nominated. I don't
Speaker 1: think it's a shoe in for a win. We will
Speaker 1: have to see who she's up against. But I think
Speaker 1: it was Oscar winning work. Like it was obviously very serious,
Speaker 1: but there was an element of camp to it. It
Speaker 1: made us both laugh well I think spoiler alert at
Speaker 1: the end, Diana's dresser reveals that she's in love with
Speaker 1: her and it kind of it kind of it took
Speaker 1: me out of the movie a little bit, Like we
Speaker 1: we were definitely laughing in the theater, but it was
Speaker 1: in a way that kind of only added to the
Speaker 1: appeal of the film to me. Like I liked that
Speaker 1: it was a little ridiculous. It took us side of
Speaker 1: the movie, and that rose dug her nails into my
Speaker 1: arm and we clutched each other for dear life while
Speaker 1: rocking back and forth, because the fact that this dresser
Speaker 1: came out to her was so absolutely uncalled for. Here's
Speaker 1: something that I'll say about the movie. I don't have
Speaker 1: a huge cultural context on Diana. I've listened to the
Speaker 1: five part series of the podcast You're Wrong About. They
Speaker 1: do a really good dive into like Dana's life and
Speaker 1: like how she was and like the Princess Dianna beanie baby,
Speaker 1: and like maybe watching the Crown is like that's the
Speaker 1: full spectrum of like what I know about Diana. And
Speaker 1: something that I really appreciated was that it was a
Speaker 1: portrait of Diana at her messiest and and in a
Speaker 1: in a way that is like the most human, Like
Speaker 1: I think often when she's portrayed, it's kind of like
Speaker 1: this mart she's kind of a martyr or she's a victim,
Speaker 1: and she definitely is those things. And she was like,
Speaker 1: you know, abused to no end by like the royal family.
Speaker 1: But I also love that they show that like her
Speaker 1: struggle through mental illness, and they obviously went into eating disorder,
Speaker 1: which I felt, honestly was really gratuitous and really triggery
Speaker 1: and not well done, but other elements of like how
Speaker 1: she was battling her own mind and I thought was
Speaker 1: like something that was really needed from the kind of
Speaker 1: Diana content of it, all of which we will never
Speaker 1: have enough. Yeah, I think a lot of the pop
Speaker 1: cultural context for Diana that I have is very much
Speaker 1: the people's princess, and like only what I got as
Speaker 1: a child. My only real memory of Diana, because I
Speaker 1: think we were maybe a little young, was right after
Speaker 1: she died, driving by a Denny's where they had um
Speaker 1: changed the sign to say you know, we love you Diana,
Speaker 1: which was sweet, but also like this random Denny's in Florida,
Speaker 1: that was her impact. So I felt like the queer baiting.
Speaker 1: I'm saying queer baiting distinctly because they cast Kristen Stewart
Speaker 1: and I want to know. So for those of the
Speaker 1: you that don't know, the writer of this film interviewed
Speaker 1: people that were at the house Diana was at that
Speaker 1: weekend and shared firsthand accounts that cannot be shared with
Speaker 1: public record. So he's using new source material that I
Speaker 1: appreciate because there's like everyone kind of pulls from the
Speaker 1: like these two biographies of Diana, and he was like, no,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna go and find
Speaker 1: firsthand accounts as well. And so there are things that
Speaker 1: he discovered in these interviews that he literally cannot tell
Speaker 1: the public what was in the interview. So the Maggie
Speaker 1: thing was very likely a real thing that he pulled
Speaker 1: from one of these interviews, but he can't tell us
Speaker 1: like who's who or whether it actually happened. But Maggie
Speaker 1: when she tells Diana that like I'm in love with
Speaker 1: you or whatever like that was. It threw me through
Speaker 1: such a look because I was like, is the only
Speaker 1: reason they cast Kristen Stewart in this movie? Because they
Speaker 1: wanted this like this meandering lesbian moment that actually didn't
Speaker 1: go anywhere and had barely an argore resolution, Like what
Speaker 1: did you think of like the whole moment. I don't
Speaker 1: really think that we can call that queer baiting. And
Speaker 1: I don't think that Kristen Stewart was cast in this
Speaker 1: very serious movie two excuse a like super minor like
Speaker 1: lesbian subplot. I think she was cast in the movie
Speaker 1: because she was She's Kristin Stewart, and she was great
Speaker 1: and who knows if that moment was in the script
Speaker 1: because it's like based on something true to life, or
Speaker 1: because you know, they added it after Kristen had signed on,
Speaker 1: maybe she had some input in it. But I also
Speaker 1: think that Diana was very clearly someone that obviously, as
Speaker 1: we've seen, people loved, you know, like people were obsessed
Speaker 1: with Diana on a on a huge scale. And I
Speaker 1: think even though that moment was a little ridiculous, what
Speaker 1: it did was illustrate to the audience and to her
Speaker 1: that there were people who loved her even though she
Speaker 1: was going through this awful time with her family, the
Speaker 1: people who are ostensibly supposed to love her. And I
Speaker 1: think in that moment in the narrative, like she needs
Speaker 1: that life draft a little bit, even though it's like
Speaker 1: slightly ridiculous. But I don't think we can call it
Speaker 1: queer beating. I think it's just actually, you know, maybe
Speaker 1: ten years ago that would have been like a male
Speaker 1: butler who said he was in love with her, and
Speaker 1: now culturally we're at a point where it gets to
Speaker 1: be a queer woman. Wow. I love that. That's a
Speaker 1: very generous read of it, and honestly, it's it's told
Speaker 1: me I feel like that is like how I would
Speaker 1: like to see the movie. I honestly would see it again.
Speaker 1: Maybe you know it did feel a little queer, baby though,
Speaker 1: And I'm ready to go. There is the Gay Eternal. Yes,
Speaker 1: we saw Marvel's Eternals and girl there and I don't
Speaker 1: know if you've heard, but Eternals features Marvel's first out
Speaker 1: and gay superhero. Okay, first of all, if you're you're
Speaker 1: saying that like it's freaking news, But if you're listening
Speaker 1: to this podcast, you are either gay or trayans or
Speaker 1: both or and you nurses hetero except everyone here, all
Speaker 1: of y'all have probably gotten an article pushed to your
Speaker 1: Twitter feed that said and probably written by me three
Speaker 1: years ago. You check the byline three years ago that
Speaker 1: has sped into your album that says Marvel announces it
Speaker 1: it's first queer superhero. Um. And also, you may have
Speaker 1: seen my interview with Samahayak in which we talked about
Speaker 1: this and about her. Did you talk about a wig
Speaker 1: that was for a different movie? Got it? Anyways, she
Speaker 1: has amazing hair. Amazing hair she is I'm talking about
Speaker 1: in person, you wouldn't know. Okay, fine, how do you
Speaker 1: know I haven't met Samahayak, because you would have told
Speaker 1: me if you had. You think I don't tell you everything, Yes,
Speaker 1: you do tell me everything. You absolutely tell me everything.
Speaker 1: We have a literal podcast, so you can tell me
Speaker 1: more things. Okay, So back to this queer bating thing. Okay, Yes,
Speaker 1: there's a Marvel's first queer Superhot, which is so stupid
Speaker 1: because like, I feel like I've been reading articles like
Speaker 1: that since the John of Time, like Marvel's first implicitly
Speaker 1: queer moment, explicitly queer moment, like off screen gay moment,
Speaker 1: a moment that is gay that's not gay, like the
Speaker 1: whole Venom thing, or like there was that moment in
Speaker 1: low Ki, but like this was the moment. When we
Speaker 1: were watching, I was like, Rose, can you point out
Speaker 1: like which ones like the gay one, and like you
Speaker 1: pointed him out to me, and at at a certain
Speaker 1: point I'd lean over to Rose and I was like, wait,
Speaker 1: so he's just a fucking nerd. Yeah he didn't. So
Speaker 1: the gay character is fast dose and his All of
Speaker 1: the eternals have different special abilities like shooting laser beans
Speaker 1: out of your eye or yeah, or like manipulating matter
Speaker 1: and illusions and turning into different people. Yeah, the gay one.
Speaker 1: His power is just that he's very smart and can
Speaker 1: invent things, and he wears rings. He wears probably seven rings,
Speaker 1: seven rings. He's an arianator there there there. He doesn't
Speaker 1: really get introduced until like kind of like very far
Speaker 1: into the movie. After there, you know, all of the
Speaker 1: eternals are like rounding up the family to fight the monsters.
Speaker 1: I there were too many characters to focus on already,
Speaker 1: and were so many, there were like twenty eternals. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I really would have enjoyed the movie a lot
Speaker 1: if I had, you know, maybe like five to focus on,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I actually felt like what
Speaker 1: they did was something of a marketing ploy, Like they
Speaker 1: were like, let's stack this movie with a ton of
Speaker 1: different slips that have gotten someone in every quadrant. Yes,
Speaker 1: every a bunch of niche audiences, you know, like a
Speaker 1: bunch of like actors and actresses that have like certain
Speaker 1: kind of cult followings, are certain kind of audience demographics,
Speaker 1: and you have what you then have is a bunch
Speaker 1: of people coming to the theater. And for me, okay,
Speaker 1: like maybe, uh, the reason I'm seeing this movie is
Speaker 1: like for crew mail on Johnny. Okay, I'm excited to
Speaker 1: see him. I'm excited to hear his jokes. Uh, he's
Speaker 1: really Yes, He's the reason that I had heard of
Speaker 1: the movie. This is what I'm saying, Like, this is like,
Speaker 1: this is what I'm saying. It's like I I we
Speaker 1: were all coming. A lot of people from this audience
Speaker 1: are coming for different reasons, and so someone else is
Speaker 1: coming for Angelia and Jolie and other person's like I'm
Speaker 1: here just to see Sama Hike. But they're all in
Speaker 1: ten percent of the movie, and so what you get
Speaker 1: is a lot of people that really liked about ten
Speaker 1: percent of the movie, you know what I mean, And like,
Speaker 1: coming away from that, it would have been nice to
Speaker 1: have a little more kind of like coalescence between just
Speaker 1: a few like central characters, so that I didn't have
Speaker 1: all these different distractions. You know, there was there was
Speaker 1: definitely not enough Psalmahiacum, and there was Angelina. Jolie was
Speaker 1: on screen a lot, but had maybe five lines, and
Speaker 1: most of her time spent on screen was just posing
Speaker 1: and kind of puffing her lips out show off. There's
Speaker 1: there's there's one scene where she's like passed out or something.
Speaker 1: I think it's because of her illness, and she's just
Speaker 1: laying on the table and the cameras direct on her
Speaker 1: and it looks like it looks like the app if
Speaker 1: you it looks like when you go to like the
Speaker 1: plastic surgeon. It's like a picture of the after and
Speaker 1: it's in like in the surgeons like waiting room and
Speaker 1: a picture of like her beautiful face. I do have
Speaker 1: to say it was It was cool for me to
Speaker 1: see the movie because last year I went on a
Speaker 1: set visit to the set of Eternals and like walked
Speaker 1: on the spaceship. So that was cool to see it
Speaker 1: because I had been on it. Um. I went to
Speaker 1: the hair and makeup trailer and I touched Angelina Jolie's
Speaker 1: wig and then someone was like, don't touch that. Um,
Speaker 1: So that was very fun. UM. I loved that Angelina
Speaker 1: Jolie was um serving dRIT Calmsley from Real Housewives Up
Speaker 1: Beverly Hills, and that her accent was unpinnable. I had
Speaker 1: no idea what she was trying to do. It was
Speaker 1: one moment it was like slightly British, then it was
Speaker 1: like a little Swedish, and it was a little Eastern
Speaker 1: European like it really, it really vacillated. Maybe that was
Speaker 1: the point. It's like she comes from many different places
Speaker 1: or something. But she looked so beautiful. So um as
Speaker 1: did everyone just one, just one? There were multiple opportunities
Speaker 1: for a born this way needle drop, and let me
Speaker 1: tell you, we did not get it because the gay
Speaker 1: character in this movie kept being like, um, I was
Speaker 1: born this way, I'm proud to be me or something
Speaker 1: like that, and I was like, it doesn't matter if
Speaker 1: you love him or capital, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: It really would have Well, maybe you know, Gaga now
Speaker 1: with the way her movie career is going, will end
Speaker 1: up in a Marvel movie eventually, no question, no question.
Speaker 1: Or maybe well I guess now x Men is part
Speaker 1: of Marvel again, so maybe she'll wind up in an
Speaker 1: x Men movie. I would love that. Um Well, speaking
Speaker 1: of superpowers, I'm very excited to get into our main
Speaker 1: discussion today, where we'll be talking about Harry Potter. Do
Speaker 1: Do Do do do? So stick around and we'll be right
Speaker 1: back to um. Figure out what Hogwarts house is current?
Speaker 1: Don fran Yes, what Hogwarts house are you in? I
Speaker 1: think I know, but I want to hear what you
Speaker 1: think it is right. Well, maybe we can, like honestly,
Speaker 1: like maybe we should take the quiz after this or
Speaker 1: something like that. But like I feel, okay, yes, everyone
Speaker 1: stay tuned for the end, we will take an official
Speaker 1: sorting quiz. But I want to hear what you think
Speaker 1: your houses. So I feel like most people might classify me.
Speaker 1: I feel like you may even classify me as a
Speaker 1: griffin door. But oh okay, wow, wow, okay, that was
Speaker 1: a very quick response. I wouldn't do it that I
Speaker 1: am actually a Slytherin. Maybe not one of the evil Slytherins,
Speaker 1: because not all Slytherins are evil hashtag not all Slytherans.
Speaker 1: But I feel like I do possess a lot of
Speaker 1: kind of self involved and self propelled, like I don't know,
Speaker 1: decision making that is, like, you know, intrinsic and a Slytheran. Um.
Speaker 1: I don't think you're that cutthroat. Are also, I think
Speaker 1: I kind of ambros I mean, you made this podcast
Speaker 1: with me, you bared witness to some like really like
Speaker 1: some some projecting. You definitely are more h You're more
Speaker 1: into scheming behind the scenes than I think you're the
Speaker 1: fran base would think. I mean you and I are
Speaker 1: equally stubborn, but I down on certain things. I don't
Speaker 1: agree with you that we're both stubborn. Um, I think
Speaker 1: you're a raven claw. Okay, I'll take it. I'll take it.
Speaker 1: Why do you think that? Um? You're very smart? You
Speaker 1: I think are really into understanding things. Um, you'd like
Speaker 1: amassing a lot of data around stuff. You force us
Speaker 1: to be organized and what we're going to talk about
Speaker 1: for this podcast and won't let me just wing it? Right?
Speaker 1: I won't let you just wing it. No, You're very
Speaker 1: inquisitive because every time we watch something, you say, what's that?
Speaker 1: What's happening? What's happening? What? What's that happening? Why is
Speaker 1: that's happening right now? Right? And what I usually say
Speaker 1: to you is I have never seen this before either,
Speaker 1: So I don't know. And you know, I feel like
Speaker 1: most people would say you Rose are a slither. I
Speaker 1: am a slither, Like I don't know, if there's no
Speaker 1: other question. I mean, actually, if if there were a backup,
Speaker 1: it would be because huffle puffs are we may be
Speaker 1: to their own drum, and that's probably where the most
Speaker 1: cancers are located. You know, Like, I think a lot
Speaker 1: of people I'm doing a lot of people don't bring
Speaker 1: your Cancyrian kind of ethos into the overall picture of
Speaker 1: who Rose down you in. But you know what, the
Speaker 1: sorting hat takes choice into account, and if that's sort
Speaker 1: of tried to put me in a huffle puff, I
Speaker 1: would ship in it. Got it, got it. I think
Speaker 1: people should know how big of it a deal it
Speaker 1: is that you Rose are talking about it, and we'll
Speaker 1: get it to this in the end of the discussion.
Speaker 1: But like Rose, you really haven't you. Everyone knows you're,
Speaker 1: like you know, a Harry Potter fanatic, but there are
Speaker 1: just certain elements of this franchise where it's just like,
Speaker 1: you know, people never get to hear you talk about
Speaker 1: this thing that is so in trench to your upbringing,
Speaker 1: like you were literally one of those people that read
Speaker 1: Harry Potter before it was cool. Yes, absolutely head of
Speaker 1: the game. But I think what is more meaningful to
Speaker 1: me now, even than my experience of reading the books
Speaker 1: or seeing the movies, is the extracurricular experience of Harry
Speaker 1: Potter that I had. It was some of the first
Speaker 1: fan fiction I read. It was maybe like the first
Speaker 1: thing I stand stunned stunned, stude, um and and like
Speaker 1: the early adds Harry Potter fan fiction was very well,
Speaker 1: like I think fan fiction in general, and like fan
Speaker 1: culture was something that you didn't really talk about, especially
Speaker 1: when you're in that preteen era where like everything is
Speaker 1: embarrassing and you're like mortified at the idea of caring
Speaker 1: about something you know. But also like the like top
Speaker 1: layer of Harry Potter, the books and the movies and stuff,
Speaker 1: that was something I wanted to share to people, you know.
Speaker 1: When I read the book for the first time after
Speaker 1: my aunt got it for me as a passover present,
Speaker 1: I was, you know, telling all my friends at school,
Speaker 1: you have to read this book about this wizard boy. Um.
Speaker 1: And then it became, you know, like what it became. Okay,
Speaker 1: so you were an evangelist for the book franchise, but
Speaker 1: you didn't want everyone to know like how deep you
Speaker 1: were in it. Kind although although it was pretty clear
Speaker 1: because I had, you know, a Harry Potter birthday party oho,
Speaker 1: although not many people came because my birthday was I
Speaker 1: was a summer baby, so like it was really hard
Speaker 1: to have birthday parties during the summer, really hard summer baby.
Speaker 1: That's why I hate my birthday to this day. Is
Speaker 1: because my child trauma known would come to your birthday parties.
Speaker 1: Is there like an embarrassing slash funny story attached to
Speaker 1: like your Harry Potter fandom that you could share to
Speaker 1: paint the picture of who you were as a kid
Speaker 1: as a Harry Potter fan. Uh? Yeah, absolutely. I made
Speaker 1: my own Hogwarts letter because when I was first reading it,
Speaker 1: it was, you know, before it was the kind of
Speaker 1: cultural phenomenon that is now. So they're just like, wasn't
Speaker 1: a lot of merch available, and I had to make
Speaker 1: my own. I had to d I y it. So
Speaker 1: I did the thing where you you know, dip a
Speaker 1: piece of paper and tea to make it look like
Speaker 1: parchment and staying on what I didn't I didn't get
Speaker 1: that deeper. Okay, well a for effort. Yeah, so that
Speaker 1: is like a very embarra And I put it in
Speaker 1: my mail. But I put the letter in my mail,
Speaker 1: but you did not. You're actually touching on something that's
Speaker 1: not triggering me. And like I think that like when
Speaker 1: we're something that's like really something that cannot necessarily be described,
Speaker 1: is the emotional choke hold the Harry Potter universe had
Speaker 1: pre movie era on like just the child, the child's imagination,
Speaker 1: like our imaginations were so big when you were a kid,
Speaker 1: like kids like so unfettered, right that you were like
Speaker 1: I'm going to put this letter in my mailbox and
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna suspend my dis liep intel. I believe
Speaker 1: that this is like mine, and that is I think
Speaker 1: one of the reasons why Harry Potter was and remains
Speaker 1: so popular, because it created this world that you wanted
Speaker 1: to live in. I think some like for some people
Speaker 1: even more so than the actual narrative of Harry Potter,
Speaker 1: they love the world and want to like larpin it
Speaker 1: right exactly and so all y'all. Even though I grew
Speaker 1: up like very sheltered, I still was such a Harry
Speaker 1: Potter stand. I had to read the first four books
Speaker 1: in like secret, like my parents couldn't know um. But
Speaker 1: I did develop into like a full fledged like Harry
Speaker 1: Potter Stan. But did having to read it in secret
Speaker 1: make you more obsessed with it? Absolutely, because like the
Speaker 1: whole franchise is about, like because it was forbidden secrets
Speaker 1: and forbiddenness and like belonging to a world that your
Speaker 1: current world doesn't understand and like you just feel that
Speaker 1: so deeply when you're like other kid. But like, actually,
Speaker 1: I've like literally never told this story like on a
Speaker 1: public platform. Okay, okay, okay. So I don't know how
Speaker 1: old I was when the first Harry Potter book came out,
Speaker 1: but I was young. Like, well, you're you're a couple
Speaker 1: of years younger than me, so you probably I was
Speaker 1: Harry Potter Potter's age or some of the books because
Speaker 1: they staggered a bit um, so I was probably Harry's age.
Speaker 1: And I remember laying in bed. My mom had like
Speaker 1: put me into bed, and I remember laying in bed
Speaker 1: and thinking about like the first spell in the book,
Speaker 1: I think, which is a guardium lebiosa, or at least
Speaker 1: the first first major was the first major, the first stunt.
Speaker 1: It's the first stunt. Yeah, And I remember sitting up
Speaker 1: in my bed and being like I'm going to move
Speaker 1: that motherfucking lamp and like trying to move the lamp
Speaker 1: by saying wing gardium lebio said to this lamp. Like
Speaker 1: that's like where I was like cognitively, And I remember
Speaker 1: you didn't think a wand was necessary. Well, I didn't
Speaker 1: have a one I should have found a stick. I
Speaker 1: should have found a stick if I had really committed
Speaker 1: to it. But as after I had started to levitate
Speaker 1: this lamp, my bedroom door, after you successfully started to
Speaker 1: levitate it, that's so cool. I was ahead of my time.
Speaker 1: After I tried to levitate this lamp, my bedroom door
Speaker 1: opens and my mom comes into my bedroom and I
Speaker 1: was like, wait what And I like pretended you like
Speaker 1: immediately pulled the covers up. You try to go back
Speaker 1: to beding like nothing's going on, mom, It's totally chill.
Speaker 1: My mom comes in whatever, she sits down, She sits
Speaker 1: down on the bed and she says, Francisco, I, UM,
Speaker 1: I was going to leave you in your beds, but
Speaker 1: the spirit told me to stay and watch you. And
Speaker 1: I just saw you try to levitate that lamp and
Speaker 1: use witchcraft, and I want you to know that is
Speaker 1: not okay. Like my mom told me that Jesus told
Speaker 1: her to watch me sleep from no. So that is
Speaker 1: that is a cultural background I'm dealing with going into
Speaker 1: the Harry Potter franchise and continued to deal with as
Speaker 1: like my mom basically thinks that like everything is like bruh,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Anything related to Witchcraft, like
Speaker 1: couldn't watch Kiki's Delivery Service, pocus Pocus, bed Noms and Broomsticks?
Speaker 1: Do you remember that? And I never want that was
Speaker 1: not one of my kid movies. Okay, we'll do an episode.
Speaker 1: I've seen it, but it's not like it wasn't a
Speaker 1: big thing for me. It's a child God. I love
Speaker 1: that movie when I was allowed to watch it, but
Speaker 1: I as a teenager. Obviously around the same time that
Speaker 1: I was getting into Harry Potter was getting seriously into
Speaker 1: Witchcraft in a real way, Like I was very into
Speaker 1: Wicka in the early two thousand's, there was definitely a
Speaker 1: like countercultural like Wickham moment it's happening. Of course, I've
Speaker 1: spent a lot of time in the New Age section
Speaker 1: of Barnes and Noble and Borders bookstore. Basically, what you're
Speaker 1: saying is that we were diametric opposites in like how
Speaker 1: we kind of developed our relationships Harry Potter, but we
Speaker 1: were both just kind of like magnet magnetically, like I
Speaker 1: have to continue to subscribe to this. What's your favorite book? Okay,
Speaker 1: what's your favorite book? And what's your favorite movie? Um,
Speaker 1: my favorite movie is seven Part one. I it's right
Speaker 1: before the Battle of Hogwarts. It's a real like adultification
Speaker 1: of the central three characters. I think it's I think
Speaker 1: it's great. I think it's beautifully done emotionally, honest, I
Speaker 1: really connected. It came to me at a time when
Speaker 1: I really needed it, I feel because that was like
Speaker 1: a new adult era of our lives too, um or
Speaker 1: at least of my life, I feel, and I um.
Speaker 1: But my favorite book was the fifth one, like the
Speaker 1: really like I hate Order of the Phoenix. Harry is
Speaker 1: such a brat in it is, but like that's the
Speaker 1: thing is That's what I'm saying, is like when in
Speaker 1: the fifth book when Harry is all like really like emo,
Speaker 1: like I was emo too, Like I just felt like
Speaker 1: so alone and sad, and like you were emo listening
Speaker 1: to your Christian rock. Yes, yes, And I feel like
Speaker 1: I mean Harry Potter. I mean. The thing the problem
Speaker 1: with that is like Harry Potter has nothing to complain about.
Speaker 1: He's always like, oh, Harry Potter, he has a lot
Speaker 1: to complain about. His life is pretty rong. My parents
Speaker 1: are dirt. I'm independently wealthy now and this is really
Speaker 1: hard for me. He is he is very rich. It's
Speaker 1: literally it's never ever discussed that he's filthy rich and
Speaker 1: all of his friends are paupers. Like he's like Ron
Speaker 1: will be like in the corner, like you know, eating
Speaker 1: like for lunch. He's like having like a pudding cup
Speaker 1: that he's eating with a comb, and like Harry Potter
Speaker 1: is all like do some of my cave all wrong?
Speaker 1: He's a He's a rich white man who grows up
Speaker 1: to be a ca Yeah, that's oh my god. He
Speaker 1: literally wants to be a cop, a cab including Harry Potter's.
Speaker 1: Can you imagine being twelve and you're like, I want
Speaker 1: to be a cop? The toxicity of that child. Well,
Speaker 1: my favorite book is Half Blood Prints. Of course, of
Speaker 1: course I feel like it makes a lot of sense
Speaker 1: for you. Okay, so why I really like that it's
Speaker 1: the last time that they're kind of innocent, um you know.
Speaker 1: And I also love the um you know, ex the
Speaker 1: exploration of Voldemort's past and um Dumbledore kind of making
Speaker 1: Harry like do the legwork of his investigation into horcruxes?
Speaker 1: Was this like after uh, he had already been deemed
Speaker 1: like a gay and so like in this it was
Speaker 1: after the whole franchise came. It was after everything was
Speaker 1: when J. K. Rowling said, he because I feel like
Speaker 1: the sixth book is when they were like, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: and Dumbledore knits wink wink. There wasn't any gay Dumbledore
Speaker 1: stuff until after all the books and movies because the
Speaker 1: author of this book series, who has no name will
Speaker 1: not be naming, you know, didn't want to actually have
Speaker 1: to do the work of having a queer character in
Speaker 1: any tangible way of developing them in any regard. Um.
Speaker 1: But my favorite movie is Harry Potter and the Prisoner
Speaker 1: of Azkaban. Beautiful. It is, you know, directed by Alfonso Kuran.
Speaker 1: It is so much darker than the first two movies,
Speaker 1: and you know, really is where all of the stylistic
Speaker 1: choices for the Wizarding World that we know now we're
Speaker 1: like really set into place. Um. And they also ditched
Speaker 1: the robes like and meshed them into modernity a little more. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they're a little bit more like real kids in that one.
Speaker 1: What about Voldemort's backstory kind of like struck you in
Speaker 1: like the sixth book, I really liked finding out, you know,
Speaker 1: like who his parents were. I think that's it gave
Speaker 1: like this like really interesting look into his psyche. Also, Um,
Speaker 1: there is evidence in the sixth book that Baltimore is
Speaker 1: maybe trans You're not doing this? What do you mean?
Speaker 1: What do you mean? Okay, So there is a scene
Speaker 1: in the sixth book that's not in the movies because
Speaker 1: you know, there's many more scenes of them looking at
Speaker 1: the memories to like, you know, find out Baltimore's backstory.
Speaker 1: There is a scene it's the last memory that Dumbledore
Speaker 1: shows Harry. Um. It's Dumbledore's memory of a young Baltimore
Speaker 1: coming to Hogwarts to request the defense against the Dark
Speaker 1: Arts teacher. And there is a moment in the memory
Speaker 1: where Dumbledore calls Valdemore Tom Riddle. And at this point
Speaker 1: Valdemore is just starting to be known as Voldemore, And
Speaker 1: it says in the book Harry could Tell that Voldemore
Speaker 1: was furious that Dumbledore refused to call him by his
Speaker 1: chosen name, chosen chosen name. It's literally in the book,
Speaker 1: I swear to God Rose. And so there is a
Speaker 1: way to read that as Voldemore has some kind of
Speaker 1: gender carry and Dumbledore refuses to acknowledge it, and Dead
Speaker 1: names this this gay man dead naming Dead name a
Speaker 1: trans person, right, don't know? I don't of course we
Speaker 1: don't know their pronouns, right. So basically what you're saying
Speaker 1: is that Dumbledore is the turf. Dumbledoes are turf, and
Speaker 1: the central character of this franchise and hero of the
Speaker 1: story is a kid who wants to grow up to
Speaker 1: be a cop and to kill a trans girl. It's
Speaker 1: like what you're saying, Yes, that is the plot of
Speaker 1: Harry Potter. Incredible. You know something that I have come
Speaker 1: back to a lot is I think when we were kids,
Speaker 1: we thought that this was like the greatest example ever
Speaker 1: of like world building, and now as adults, I can
Speaker 1: see a lot of the cracks. Where are you know? Well, Like,
Speaker 1: first of all, the entire economy of the Wizarding World
Speaker 1: revolves around joke shops, candy store, wars, and books, right,
Speaker 1: and that's it. That's their whole economy truly, And it's
Speaker 1: it's enslavery because they have house elves. Wait, Dobby is
Speaker 1: an indentured slave like literally like it's in surfdom. Like
Speaker 1: that's crazy. I feel like they're within all of that.
Speaker 1: It's as also corrupt as fun, like this is not
Speaker 1: a democracy, like you know, like the Ministry of Magic
Speaker 1: like controls the media. Yeah, there's a lot of class
Speaker 1: warfare in Harry Potter too. Um. I mean you were
Speaker 1: talking about how poor Ron is and like, you know,
Speaker 1: it's it's kind of like repeated over and over again,
Speaker 1: how poor Ron is. Right, But what's unclear really is
Speaker 1: like what is like the UK currency to like Yalleyan's
Speaker 1: conversion rate. I think that's like the thing that I'm
Speaker 1: thinking about is like, like like what what like that
Speaker 1: all of these things that are very undefined. And also
Speaker 1: it's very clear that she who must not be named
Speaker 1: was kind of, you know, make ing it up as
Speaker 1: she went along, which is fine. Authors can do that, Yeah,
Speaker 1: of course, but you know I can see I see
Speaker 1: the holes now as an adult. And some of the
Speaker 1: more interesting story choices like why did Harry and Jenny
Speaker 1: end up together? So like all like Jenny is like
Speaker 1: such a kind of non character for the first couple
Speaker 1: of books never and all they like kind of talk
Speaker 1: about is that she looks like Harry's mom. Honestly, it's
Speaker 1: giving like when Joey and Rachel get together at the
Speaker 1: end of Friends, why did they all have to end
Speaker 1: up with the person that they dated in high school. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's actually so toxic, and clearly the person who Harry
Speaker 1: had the most chemistry with was Draco Malfoy. Yeah, egs obviously,
Speaker 1: like I feel like there is I mean, the fucking
Speaker 1: your enemies thing, or rather fucking your bullies is really
Speaker 1: what it's. I know that's like a tired trope and
Speaker 1: like a lot of LGBTQ stuff, but like it's hot.
Speaker 1: It's I feel like the Harry Draco tension was palpable.
Speaker 1: And then you know, like marrying your best friend's little
Speaker 1: sister who's the first person you kiss in high school
Speaker 1: is so straight. You know. Something I think about a
Speaker 1: lot with like book two movie adaptations is what is
Speaker 1: gained in the adaptation outside of the story. I think
Speaker 1: Harry Potter became in the third movie, as I was saying,
Speaker 1: like very stylistic, it didn't necessarily become cool, like, well,
Speaker 1: we'll get to Twilight eventually. But one of the things
Speaker 1: that I really like about the Twilight movies as an
Speaker 1: adaptation is that there's so much cooler than the books.
Speaker 1: You know, like everyone's um like dressed better than they
Speaker 1: are in the books. If I would say Bella is
Speaker 1: dressed better. She's dressed better than she is in the books,
Speaker 1: because in the books she wears a lot of khaki skirts. Um.
Speaker 1: They have really cool soundtracks, and then you look at
Speaker 1: things like in the Harry Potter movies, like, um, you know,
Speaker 1: they were a lot of robes in the books, and
Speaker 1: then in the movies they have a lot of kind
Speaker 1: of ugly outfits like her Mind's fuel ball dress. I
Speaker 1: thought she looked beautiful just because she was in something
Speaker 1: that she looked beautiful, but that dress was hideous. They
Speaker 1: actually have a replica of it at the Wizarding World
Speaker 1: of Harry Potter theme park. Did you go? Did you
Speaker 1: see it? I've I've been to the theme parks many times. Okay,
Speaker 1: we should go together, if you get super stound to
Speaker 1: go together. Yeah, we have to drink a lot of
Speaker 1: butter beer. That sounds like I would ganty ship my
Speaker 1: pants immediately. But you're actually touching on a really important
Speaker 1: thing that we have to address, which is that in
Speaker 1: the fourth movies, the stylistic kind of um integrity really
Speaker 1: went for their haircuts, and Harry and Ron have these
Speaker 1: disgusting skater boy haircuts that everyone's so of the time.
Speaker 1: It dates the movie so much. It really did not
Speaker 1: age well, and I had that haircut rose. Meanwhile, her
Speaker 1: money in the fourth movie, just like you know, after
Speaker 1: kind of the second movie, they're like, we're not going
Speaker 1: to do the thing where we're trying to make her
Speaker 1: hair look bushy anymore. And then by the fourth movie
Speaker 1: she's just blonde. Literally, any time you have a series
Speaker 1: or franchise where they start out and like, yeah, this
Speaker 1: character's ugly and the whole thing is that she's ugly
Speaker 1: and a nerd, they give up on it immediately, Like
Speaker 1: she got the Ugly Betty treatment, where like after season
Speaker 1: one they were like, I guess we should just make
Speaker 1: ugly Betty hot, right, Like that's kind of what they did.
Speaker 1: But at least ugly Betty had braces. Her money didn't
Speaker 1: even have the buck well that she's supposed to have.
Speaker 1: Betty did get the braces removed at the end of
Speaker 1: the show. It was in the last season. She's still
Speaker 1: a whole season half season. We will be back checking
Speaker 1: that in our Ugly Betty episode. Okay, it's funny now
Speaker 1: to ascribe, you know, are are like, um, you know,
Speaker 1: two thousand twenty one perspective of like queerness onto Harry Potter,
Speaker 1: and Um, I guess what I'm saying is, which of
Speaker 1: the Harry Potter characters do you think are queer trans?
Speaker 1: A question we will ask for probably every episode, like, wait,
Speaker 1: which which are these characters are trans? Um, I mean
Speaker 1: that we have already talked about Voldemort has some kind
Speaker 1: of gender canetically trans. I think trans. I think she's
Speaker 1: a trans woman. I think that after you've kind of
Speaker 1: described to me what's going on and the dynamic between
Speaker 1: her and Double Door, that's kind of what I'm like.
Speaker 1: She did get some work done on her face, and
Speaker 1: she looks fierce. She went down to Beverly Hills. Now
Speaker 1: she went to Brazil. Mama, Um, I think that I
Speaker 1: think you actually plan in the seat in my head
Speaker 1: that like Luna Loved Good is giving like some NB
Speaker 1: vibes to me, like and Luna in fan fiction is
Speaker 1: always queer in some way. Really, I mean, she's so
Speaker 1: like open minded and so like untethered to like, you know,
Speaker 1: the rules of the world. I think she's giving me
Speaker 1: like non binary pan sexual. You know who's really giving
Speaker 1: that as well? Is Tonks. Tonks Is Tonks is a
Speaker 1: metamorpha magus something some word, some word that's like two
Speaker 1: syllables too long, um, and can literally change their appearance
Speaker 1: in every way. So obviously there's some gender scenario. They
Speaker 1: are literally an animal. Do you know those books The Animal?
Speaker 1: I love Animals? I actually never read them, but the
Speaker 1: covers were we're definitely doing an animal. The covers were
Speaker 1: kind of um, kind of hot um. Professor Trelawney reads
Speaker 1: us trans to me like a latent life trans woman.
Speaker 1: Professor Professor Sprout definitely lesbian, older lesbian, Oh yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1: Harry and Draco gay gay gay boyfriend. Draco's whole I
Speaker 1: think kind of like the impetus of his character is
Speaker 1: that he's like a tortured homosexual and that's why he's
Speaker 1: taking it out on everybody else. Hagrid is a bear.
Speaker 1: I think. Okay, there's a thing that she who must
Speaker 1: not be named. It is going to be confusing now
Speaker 1: when we say that with a referring to Baltimore or
Speaker 1: the author of this novel. But y'all can just get
Speaker 1: you know who, you know who. There's a thing that
Speaker 1: happens where like femininity is kind of like mocked in
Speaker 1: this franchise, and like a big stick with Haggard is
Speaker 1: like he's this big, burly guy with a big beard
Speaker 1: and he does manly things, but like he comes home
Speaker 1: and he like wears an apron and he loves tea
Speaker 1: and gardening and he cries when his animals die and
Speaker 1: stuff like that. I think it's like a joke, but
Speaker 1: I think that's like one of the most beautiful things
Speaker 1: about his character. And like the I think it's like
Speaker 1: a complete like gender, like a portrait of his gender.
Speaker 1: You know, sure, you know who you know who reads
Speaker 1: this very transmask to me? Whose um Argus Filch the
Speaker 1: Hogwarts caretaker. I also a definite trans woman to me
Speaker 1: is Madame Maxine the Giantess Shop. I'm not allowed to
Speaker 1: laugh at that joke. Um, she's a tall girl, and
Speaker 1: she's a tall girl. Tall girls, you know what I'm
Speaker 1: talking about. The actress who played her served like that
Speaker 1: was like she was so incredible and like, honestly, the
Speaker 1: chemistry between them palpable. You know who's very cis though,
Speaker 1: is Flour Delaco. Flour Delacre is cis culture. Jenny Weasley Sis.
Speaker 1: Although she although she gives me um lesbian vibes, Yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure, I think she hasn't set herself free yet,
Speaker 1: Like I think I think Jenny's like just honestly, one
Speaker 1: Maggie Nielson book away from Jenny Weasley is one Phoebe
Speaker 1: Bridgers lyric away from writing her broomstick right out of
Speaker 1: the closet. Oh yeah, and straight to the cubby hole
Speaker 1: peeves the pul cherk Geist. Oh absolutely, um like gender queer.
Speaker 1: Speaking of Poulter, guys, I have you ever noticed that
Speaker 1: like moaning Myrtles, Like the whole thing is that she's
Speaker 1: like literally a sexual predator, Like yeah, she just hangs
Speaker 1: around looking at Harry while he's taking a bath and
Speaker 1: he's four teens like from moment one like like Harry's
Speaker 1: like taking a piss and moaning Mortles Like what's going on?
Speaker 1: You a nice cock? You know what I mean? There's
Speaker 1: but okay, but there's no room for subtlety, like like
Speaker 1: she must not be named really goes there like he's
Speaker 1: in the bath and she's like, oh hoo's going and watching. Well,
Speaker 1: she's probably a trans woman because she's in a bathroom
Speaker 1: making a siss person feel unsafe. Oh my god, wow,
Speaker 1: well you went there. I did not, do, you know?
Speaker 1: When I was a nightlife producer. I had two very
Speaker 1: large Harry Potter raves. Wait what did that look like?
Speaker 1: I bring that up because for one of them, we
Speaker 1: had our good friend Channo. We both love. She recorded
Speaker 1: a track as Moaning Myrtle that we played on a
Speaker 1: loop at one of the rooms in the party. And
Speaker 1: it was just moaning Myrtle kind of like saying like
Speaker 1: really like kind of sexually deviant things. Really that just
Speaker 1: played on kind of like a low level. Um. She
Speaker 1: was just like yeah, she was like she was like,
Speaker 1: uh oh, Harry, like come fuck me in the bathroom
Speaker 1: or something like that. I don't know. Um, it was
Speaker 1: just like it was it was funny. Oh god, that's
Speaker 1: I can't wait what did you wear? Um? Well? I
Speaker 1: was harmony at both of the parties. The first one
Speaker 1: was Hogwarts Rave and the second one was a Chamber
Speaker 1: of Secrets. They were both really fun, and you know,
Speaker 1: we're we're full of queer people who loved Harry A.
Speaker 1: Potter and we're like reinterpreting it from a queer perspective.
Speaker 1: And this obviously was before we learned what we know
Speaker 1: now about the person I wrote Harry Potter, and I
Speaker 1: actually will get to that, but I actually need to
Speaker 1: know now, like, Okay, did you have you always felt
Speaker 1: yourself Hermione? Like is that where you And also as
Speaker 1: a follow up, did you ever have a crush on
Speaker 1: the characters as you read them? No? No, I don't
Speaker 1: really have fictional crushes like that, even though I'm surprised.
Speaker 1: Even though I love fan fiction, it's not usually from
Speaker 1: the perspective of like self insertion. I did always see
Speaker 1: myself as a Hermione growing up, which is interesting because
Speaker 1: I am such a slytherin um now though I don't
Speaker 1: know if I'm Hermione. I think I'm more of like
Speaker 1: a like a Pansy park in sin. I think you're
Speaker 1: kind of a Rita Skeeter if I also big trans energy,
Speaker 1: no no, no, no, no, Rita Skeeter gives me like
Speaker 1: I mean, I literally when I was a journalist, I
Speaker 1: was Rita Skeeter. If we're going to talk about all
Speaker 1: of the foreshadowing of you know who's transphobia, Rita Skeeter
Speaker 1: was this like kind of garishly dressed performance of a
Speaker 1: woman who transformed into something else so she could spy
Speaker 1: on people in safe spaces. Oh right, Wow, I the
Speaker 1: whole time, I thought she was like, you know, a
Speaker 1: mentaphorizing of corrupt media and journal and I think she's
Speaker 1: I think she's that. But now that we're reading it
Speaker 1: on like a deeper level, like of course, and I
Speaker 1: feel like I have to say when I when I
Speaker 1: read it, I did see myself. I identified hardest with
Speaker 1: her mindy, like she was my girl. I paid attention
Speaker 1: to everything she did and when the movies. By the
Speaker 1: time the movies came out, I developed a crush on
Speaker 1: Daniel Redcliffe like pretty quickly, like we were the same age.
Speaker 1: I think Daniel Radcliffe like got very hot as he
Speaker 1: grew older. I don't know, like in his like Equis era,
Speaker 1: like when he was like that play where he like
Speaker 1: fucked a horse. You know, I saw it like we
Speaker 1: all googled, like, you know, doesn't he doesn't suck a horse.
Speaker 1: He kills a bunch of horses. I've read the play
Speaker 1: multiple times, and yes, there he doesn't fuck a horse
Speaker 1: quote unquote, but there is a spiritual sex, sex based
Speaker 1: like sacrifice thing that he does with the horses that
Speaker 1: involves an orgasmic climax. No, what happens is that he
Speaker 1: and then he does kill them know what happens is
Speaker 1: that he fox a girl in the because he's horning
Speaker 1: for horses. He fox a girl in the stable, and
Speaker 1: then he feels so awful that the horses saw it
Speaker 1: that he blinds them all because he feels like he's
Speaker 1: cheating on the horse. But what I'm saying is that
Speaker 1: he doesn't suck the horse. Okay, well, I think that
Speaker 1: the playwright would leave it up to interpretation. I do
Speaker 1: feel like that is kind of something that the play
Speaker 1: is getting at, is like this this kind of like
Speaker 1: psycho sexual thing that he has. And yes, I'm not
Speaker 1: disagreeing with that, but what I'm saying is that he
Speaker 1: does not physically fuck a horse. No way, he doesn't
Speaker 1: physically fuck a horse in the play. I was being facetious,
Speaker 1: as you often are. You know who I kind of
Speaker 1: identify with now, Professor McGonagall. Oh. You know what part
Speaker 1: of the books and movies makes me cry every time
Speaker 1: without fail is in definitely Hollows, when the Battle of
Speaker 1: Hogwarts is about to start and McGonagall does the spell
Speaker 1: to make the castle come to life and fight. It
Speaker 1: gets me every time I have goose bumps. I do
Speaker 1: think Harry Potter is having kind of a second life
Speaker 1: or third life or fourth life, because I mean, this
Speaker 1: has been going on for so long now on TikTok.
Speaker 1: I'm not as on TikTok as you are. You're really
Speaker 1: in it with the kids these days. Hello, fellow teens um.
Speaker 1: I think we both have seen the the TikTok reinterpretation
Speaker 1: of the chess scene from Harry Potter. And when I
Speaker 1: make my move, uh, there's stuff and then and then
Speaker 1: Ron says, not me, not harmony you. It's a very
Speaker 1: difficult because there's like a rounded r. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: your but you It's like why oh oh a you
Speaker 1: are maybe is a spelling you're you're you're. I have
Speaker 1: to say also that Ron, I feel like he was
Speaker 1: cast to be kind of like this like doofy type,
Speaker 1: like he was supposed to be like unconventionally kind of
Speaker 1: like I don't know all of my friend's head crushes
Speaker 1: on Ron growing up. I feel like I developed a
Speaker 1: crush on Ron as I became like an adult. He's
Speaker 1: kind of like hot, like in that like hot in
Speaker 1: the like way that like some people look hot because
Speaker 1: they got like hit in the face with it. They
Speaker 1: look like they got hit in the face with a shovel,
Speaker 1: do you know what I mean? He's definitely someone who
Speaker 1: I would hook up with regularly and tell no one
Speaker 1: about it, you know what I mean? Because I mean
Speaker 1: I think there there there's a certain class of people
Speaker 1: that I like to hook up with that are just hot,
Speaker 1: like kind of busted and like nothing going on personality
Speaker 1: wise or like in their brain at all. Like would
Speaker 1: never want to bring them to a party, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. Yeah, he has dumb jock energy. It's
Speaker 1: like he's a hot dummy. Yeah, which I love me too,
Speaker 1: my favorite hot dummies. You can slide into the d
Speaker 1: m s. Okay. So this is something that happens in
Speaker 1: fan of fiction obviously, Like they're wizards and they have sex,
Speaker 1: so like there are like lube spells, no, they're or
Speaker 1: like score out of the wand sometimes um or there's
Speaker 1: like a spell that just like loubes them up instantly,
Speaker 1: or like a doucheng spell that we need that we
Speaker 1: need that. If you, if you were you know, an inventor,
Speaker 1: if you invent the thing that allows people who have
Speaker 1: but sex to not douche anymore, you will make millions.
Speaker 1: You are here, you will make more money than she
Speaker 1: who must not be named, and you will have it,
Speaker 1: and you will have a theme park, and you're dedicated
Speaker 1: to you in your honor. Our producer just dropped a
Speaker 1: Hermione Belatrix fan fiction in the chat, and I think
Speaker 1: we need to do a little dramatic reading. Should I
Speaker 1: be Hermione and you can be Bela Tricks? Oh no,
Speaker 1: this is on fan fiction dot net. Okay, so this,
Speaker 1: this Bela Tricks Hermione fan fiction is by an author
Speaker 1: named peace Love Belatricks peace dot love dot. The title
Speaker 1: of the of the title of the fan of fiction
Speaker 1: is only Her, and there is a disclaimer for this
Speaker 1: chapter was which is this will have lesbian sex. So yeah,
Speaker 1: wink face. So yeah, how old do you think the
Speaker 1: person who read this was fourteen? All fan fiction authors
Speaker 1: are fourteen? Of course they're either fourteen or thirty seven,
Speaker 1: there is no in between. Got it? Got it? Okay?
Speaker 1: And now we will give a dramatic reading of only
Speaker 1: Her by peace Love Belatricks an excerpt, an excerpt, and
Speaker 1: Fran will be playing Hermione and I will be playing Bellatricks.
Speaker 1: Well like we can take turns on the narration. Okay,
Speaker 1: I didn't think you were capable of looking at a
Speaker 1: mud blood like this, asked her money, while eyeing the
Speaker 1: woman carefully. You're an algics. I'm trying to give her.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to give her sort of like a like
Speaker 1: a lived in cockney vibe. Is yeah, the cockney accent. No, No,
Speaker 1: she would be more like like like stilted upper class
Speaker 1: like you're known exception granger, said Belatricks. So she bit
Speaker 1: her lip her money, looked at the woman in front
Speaker 1: of her, and felt her breathing hitch a bit. As
Speaker 1: you know, I have always been top of my class
Speaker 1: at I'm rather intelligent. I analyzed my situation with you
Speaker 1: and have come to the conclusion that is better for
Speaker 1: my sake to just give it to you, said her money.
Speaker 1: Belatricks was hanging onto every word that came out of
Speaker 1: her pretty little mouth. Off, I want to give it
Speaker 1: to you, Belatricks, take me. This last part came out
Speaker 1: as a whisper. The woman nearly swooned at what the
Speaker 1: girl on the floor was saying with a flick of
Speaker 1: her wand the chains disappeared around her Mines risk, Oh
Speaker 1: this is I think that this is touching on something
Speaker 1: that's very reminiscent of my high school experience, which is,
Speaker 1: you know, touching over the bra and that is like
Speaker 1: the most erotic thing you could be doing. Like when
Speaker 1: I had a girlfriend in seventh grade. Please pretend to
Speaker 1: be shocked. I um, yeah, I remember touching Brittany over
Speaker 1: the broad and being like, I've never done anything more
Speaker 1: erotic in mind hare line, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I've never read anything as erotic as that excerpt, which
Speaker 1: were only her peace love belatricks go for everyone subscribe
Speaker 1: and followed to peace dot love dot Bellatrix. Now that
Speaker 1: we're having a conversation about UM authors, you do think
Speaker 1: it is unfortunately time to touch briefly on you know who. Okay,
Speaker 1: we're gonna put the book in context of our of
Speaker 1: our modern day, which, unfortunately, I think what in UM
Speaker 1: she who must not be named did a bunch of
Speaker 1: tweeted a bunch of things that no one really needed
Speaker 1: to hear, and we're not going to get into them
Speaker 1: here because I'm really not interested in going through and
Speaker 1: talking about exactly what this person has said about trans people.
Speaker 1: Other people have analyzed it and broken it down in
Speaker 1: smarter ways than we will be able to and we'll
Speaker 1: we'll give you some suggestions for further reading towards the
Speaker 1: end of the episode. What I think is interesting is
Speaker 1: looking back at the text itself and looking for clues,
Speaker 1: because I do think they're there. Um. I mean, we
Speaker 1: talked a little bit before about Rita Skeeter and kind
Speaker 1: of a joking way, but also this kind of attitude
Speaker 1: that this person clearly has about trans women is very
Speaker 1: apparent in ways that we didn't pick up on his kids. Um.
Speaker 1: There is a scene in Prisoner Ascaman, both the book
Speaker 1: and the film, the Boggert scene where the Defense against
Speaker 1: the Dark Arts classes facing down a Boggert, which is
Speaker 1: this monster that turns into whatever you fear the most.
Speaker 1: It lives in a closet, and so they're in class
Speaker 1: facing it and Neville's Boggert comes out and it is
Speaker 1: Professor Snape, which is like the person nevill is scared
Speaker 1: of the most. And the spell that they do to
Speaker 1: defeat the Boggert transforms the Bogger into something that they
Speaker 1: can laugh at, because that's what makes Boggerts go away
Speaker 1: as laughter. And what the spell does is put Snape
Speaker 1: in women's clothing, and then suddenly this terrifying person becomes
Speaker 1: ridiculous and they all laugh at it because to she
Speaker 1: who must not be named, the funniest thing she can
Speaker 1: think of is, you know, a guy dressing a man
Speaker 1: a man in women's clothing. Like clearly that's how that's
Speaker 1: how this author thinks of trans women in ways again
Speaker 1: that we don't have to get into. But I think
Speaker 1: it's like telling. I mean, it just goes to show
Speaker 1: how out of touch the whole situation, how how out
Speaker 1: of touch she is from Like what people take away
Speaker 1: from these books, like we talked earlier about like how
Speaker 1: this franchise has a really um palpable way of capturing
Speaker 1: the imagination of a child, especially if that kid feels motored,
Speaker 1: which honestly, queer or straight, like every kid felt like
Speaker 1: left out once you start hitting puberty, right, like you
Speaker 1: have that air of your life where everything is embarrassing.
Speaker 1: Um but like, especially if you're queer, like you really
Speaker 1: feel like outside of the world and you feel like
Speaker 1: you know, there is like nothing for you. And this
Speaker 1: this book was such a beautiful, like kind of way
Speaker 1: of framing like there is a world on the other
Speaker 1: side for you with people that you belong to. You
Speaker 1: know what I mean, did you feel that way growing
Speaker 1: up and reading the books? Yeah, that's that you know, Um,
Speaker 1: I definitely connected with this idea of the you know,
Speaker 1: the the kid who was weird and like discovered that
Speaker 1: there was something about them that connected them to like
Speaker 1: a greater community. I mean, that's a queer reading of
Speaker 1: Harry Potter. And it's like, so you don't have to
Speaker 1: dig deep to find queer subtext in in these books.
Speaker 1: It just goes to show that she the thing that
Speaker 1: she produced that she's kind of like tainted our memory
Speaker 1: of is actually like we can't let her taint tainted,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like it has to This
Speaker 1: story belongs to us, the feelings we felt growing up.
Speaker 1: I feel like it still belongs to us. I don't
Speaker 1: know where I really fall on that conversation, because last
Speaker 1: summer there was a lot of discourse about you know,
Speaker 1: death of the author and like authorial intent and um,
Speaker 1: you know a lot of people kind of reclaiming this
Speaker 1: and saying, oh, it doesn't have an author, and like
Speaker 1: it belongs to us. And I don't think I'll ever
Speaker 1: personally be able to totally decontextualize Harry Potter from the
Speaker 1: person who created it. Um. But I've at least swung
Speaker 1: back around from where I was last year, which was
Speaker 1: I don't want anything to do with this. The person
Speaker 1: who created it like doesn't want to acknowledge my dignity
Speaker 1: as a human too. Now I'm like, well, there are
Speaker 1: parts of this I can like love, like earnestly or
Speaker 1: ironically or like whatever, And then they're parts of it
Speaker 1: that I'm just like we'll stay away from or be
Speaker 1: critical of. I think that that is like in the
Speaker 1: I hate to say this, like to invoke the term
Speaker 1: cancel culture at all. There's a really great video that
Speaker 1: Rose turned me onto by ContraPoints that like talks about
Speaker 1: the author of this book in relationship like can cancel
Speaker 1: culture whatever. But like I think that there's like a
Speaker 1: very unnuanced thing that's happening in social media right now.
Speaker 1: We're like people will tweet about something and then all
Speaker 1: of a sudden, everyone's like delete it, like we never
Speaker 1: want to see it again, ban it from the libraries
Speaker 1: or whatever, and like that's actually not what like being
Speaker 1: kind of like restorative lee justice minded in like our world,
Speaker 1: Like it looks like like the point as you're exactly
Speaker 1: as you're saying, is like, when these cultural objects come
Speaker 1: into like our lives, now, it's our job to like
Speaker 1: make history, stick to it, and then still try to
Speaker 1: enjoy it the best we can understanding that context. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I think, um, you know, interrogate and investigate our
Speaker 1: own relationships to it exactly and what those relationships look
Speaker 1: like knowing all of this, because I'm sure there are
Speaker 1: people that that wish they could just pretend they had
Speaker 1: never read her tweets and like love this in an
Speaker 1: uncomplicated way. That's not me. I want to know I
Speaker 1: was this close to getting a deadly hollice tattoo rose Like,
Speaker 1: I don't know what I would have done if I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't know what my relationship to that would have
Speaker 1: been if that You know, well, I did get a
Speaker 1: deadly hollowed tattoo. And I mean even before she who
Speaker 1: must not be named, came out like really as transphobic,
Speaker 1: I could already see the writing on the wall, and
Speaker 1: I got it covered up because I she she had
Speaker 1: at that point kind of already started like liking transphobic tweets,
Speaker 1: which is funny because I used to tweet at her
Speaker 1: even before there was any even whisperings that she could
Speaker 1: be a turf. Um I used to tweet at her
Speaker 1: asking like, what is trans healthcare like in the Wizarding World.
Speaker 1: I'm sure it was something she was very concerned with.
Speaker 1: What do you think trans healthcare is like in the
Speaker 1: Wizarding World? Um, I mean not there is there like
Speaker 1: is there a hormone replacement therapy potion? Okay, So producer
Speaker 1: Phoebe has dropped into the chat that that the um
Speaker 1: Diagon Alley does have like crunchy queer vibes, like kind
Speaker 1: of like and I feel like maybe the girls got
Speaker 1: their moans a Diagon Alley, like in the kind of
Speaker 1: like back and and and like I think it's a
Speaker 1: lot like how healthcare exists in America, and that there's
Speaker 1: not a ton of infrastructure for trans healthcare federally from
Speaker 1: the government, but Mutual Aid has found ways to get
Speaker 1: healthcare to transgirl. Okay, so maybe they weren't going to
Speaker 1: Diagon Alley. They were going to Knock Turn Alley, which
Speaker 1: is like that's like the bad alley, like where you know,
Speaker 1: like dark magic stuff happens. But Okay, I do agree
Speaker 1: that maybe at one point trans healthcare in there wasn't
Speaker 1: in world was like kind of jankie um. But I
Speaker 1: would say like, let's um, you know, reclaim the narrative
Speaker 1: and say that it has let's apply some fan fiction type.
Speaker 1: Thinking I'm a student of Hogwarts. I would just go
Speaker 1: to Madam Palmfrey um down in the you know, infirmary,
Speaker 1: and say, Madam Palmfrey, you know I have always seen
Speaker 1: myself as a woman and I really want to start
Speaker 1: my medical transition. And she's like, Pip, Pip cheerio, here's
Speaker 1: here's an est. Madam Palmfreys like the front dust people
Speaker 1: at callen More, They're like, you're gonna need to make
Speaker 1: an appointment. No, I don't even need a prescription nothing.
Speaker 1: She's just like, here you go. Actually, maybe you don't
Speaker 1: even need to go in. Maybe it's sent to you
Speaker 1: by OWL because you ordered it online. There's there is
Speaker 1: or worldwide Web. I feel like, well, actually, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm sure in this version of our reality there's a
Speaker 1: worldwide Web, or at least a wizarding Worldwide Web www
Speaker 1: w dot com. You know what I think it's time
Speaker 1: to do, Fran, what do you think it's time today?
Speaker 1: I think it's time to take this sorting hot quiz.
Speaker 1: Fran I found a quiz it claims to be better
Speaker 1: than the pot or more quiz, which also the pot
Speaker 1: more quiz takes like an hour. And also we don't
Speaker 1: want anything sanctioned by she who must not be named,
Speaker 1: So true, I think what we should do is I'm
Speaker 1: going to ask you the questions and put your answers
Speaker 1: into into mine. You're going to do the same thing
Speaker 1: for me, and then we will be able to surprise
Speaker 1: each other. And with the house. Okay, France, imagine you
Speaker 1: have a wand and you can do any magic with it.
Speaker 1: What do you want it's core to be made of? Come?
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Oh, there are options. There are options. This
Speaker 1: is not a right in quiz um Holly with the
Speaker 1: phoenix feather core, Chestnut with the phoenix feather core, Cherry
Speaker 1: with a dragon heartstring core, you with a phoenix feather core,
Speaker 1: or I'm going to say you with a phoenix feather core.
Speaker 1: I would say, what's most outstanding portraits? Hanging plants, various paintings.
Speaker 1: I have stone walls. Well, we know that my apartment
Speaker 1: is like essentially not decorated at all because I hate it.
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna say I have stone walls and you portraits.
Speaker 1: Now I have a lot of art, oh right, right,
Speaker 1: various paintings, various paintings, failing the best friend. Well, I
Speaker 1: was confusing, like the idea of portraits, and I have
Speaker 1: a lot of figurative work. What is your magical transportation model? Apparition,
Speaker 1: flu network flying or port key flying boots for me
Speaker 1: and for you? No apparition? I wanna. I want to
Speaker 1: be popping in and out like that. Okay, cool, I
Speaker 1: I enjoy the ride, I'll fly. What is your zodiac sign?
Speaker 1: You're a Taurus and I'm a cancer. What are you
Speaker 1: curious about the world after we die? I will say that.
Speaker 1: Actually the quiz says world after the die, Earth, world, evil, plants,
Speaker 1: magical creatures. I'm I'm concerned with evil. I think that
Speaker 1: morality is like the crux of a lot of things
Speaker 1: that take up space in my brain. I'm more curious
Speaker 1: about the world. So just world or world after the die?
Speaker 1: I'm not. I don't care about that. Please slop. Okay,
Speaker 1: So you're evil, I'm world. How do your friends describe you? Well,
Speaker 1: we can only answer this for each other. Rose recklessness,
Speaker 1: hard work, wise, mysterious, brave or righteous. I think people
Speaker 1: that don't know you that well would say brave. I
Speaker 1: think most of your friends would consider you I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say righteous, and I don't say righteous necessarily
Speaker 1: in the ethical sense. I'm saying righteous and that when
Speaker 1: you believe something, there's very little that can back you
Speaker 1: down in a good way. I'm saying that in a
Speaker 1: positive way. I think of Rose as someone who just
Speaker 1: really knows what you want. That's kind of righteousness that
Speaker 1: it was my second runner, I would be recklessness, okay, um,
Speaker 1: And for you, I think the kind of obvious one
Speaker 1: also to people who don't know you very well, would
Speaker 1: be brave. Um. But I'm going to say hard work.
Speaker 1: I think you're very committed to your work and your
Speaker 1: friends and your life. From interesting that none of us
Speaker 1: chose wise for each other. I don't know if people
Speaker 1: look to me for like wisdom. I think people who
Speaker 1: subscribe to your newsletter maybe not you, but I do
Speaker 1: subscribe to it. I just don't read it. I read
Speaker 1: it sometimes, well, I mostly read it to see if
Speaker 1: you mentioned me, which I do. Sometimes you do. Sometimes
Speaker 1: you steal my jokes. And now we're at the final question,
Speaker 1: what do you typically do when you get together with
Speaker 1: your friends at home? We celebrate a special event. We
Speaker 1: usually research and discuss scientific ideas. We usually get together
Speaker 1: to do our homework, or we deal with our enemies
Speaker 1: and build special strategies or relaxation. I can only go
Speaker 1: off of what we do with each other, and I
Speaker 1: guess relaxation. But also like we do build strategies. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we do work a lot, we did together, butn't know,
Speaker 1: it doesn't feel like work, but not to deal with
Speaker 1: our enemies, which is what this question is about. So
Speaker 1: I guess, let's say for relaxation, we do both have
Speaker 1: a lot of nemesses. Yeah, which is important to note.
Speaker 1: I guess for the sake of the well, a real answer,
Speaker 1: but like yeah, because we do spend a lot of
Speaker 1: time processing with each other and and and like you know, conniving. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: so we strategies, special strategy strate. Okay, So now we're
Speaker 1: going to click the button and get our result surprising
Speaker 1: no one. Do you want me to tell you who
Speaker 1: you are? Yeah? Well, can I guess? Yes? You can?
Speaker 1: My Slytherin. Yeah you're a slitherin. Yeah, yeah, of course
Speaker 1: you are. Okay, do you want to guess what you are?
Speaker 1: Does it say I'm a raven claw or no, you're
Speaker 1: a griffin? Door fuck that I've taken other quizzes that
Speaker 1: said I was a Slytherin. I had some slitherin answers
Speaker 1: in there, but I was trying not to throw the quiz.
Speaker 1: You know, fran I think you're just not a slytherin
Speaker 1: denial and in denial. But you know what this means
Speaker 1: that we are not allowing the houses to divide us.
Speaker 1: That's right, We're having um inter house friendship and we
Speaker 1: are almost diametrically opposed, and that that's what's what makes
Speaker 1: our friendship so strong. And I'm going to reach my
Speaker 1: hand out to you this time. This time, actually we
Speaker 1: are all this time. You are reciprocate, and I'm not
Speaker 1: just stretching, and it's definitely you. You're not you're not
Speaker 1: in the vibe. You're kind of you got a kind
Speaker 1: of stiff shoulder. But I am also now digging my nails. Yes,
Speaker 1: you are giving me a little acupuncture here. Well, Rose,
Speaker 1: it's glad that we confirmed things that everyone already knows
Speaker 1: about us, which is that I'm a grove indoor and
Speaker 1: your a Slytherin. But that is what makes this whole
Speaker 1: story so interesting. So we'll be back next week talking
Speaker 1: about Taylor Swift's Red album Kennon. Obviously, we're going to
Speaker 1: do an episode on Not, so y'all can study up
Speaker 1: or not, you know, come into it cool and that's wine.
Speaker 1: You can tweet us your takes on this week's episode.
Speaker 1: I'm actually really excited to know what y'all think of
Speaker 1: the podcast. Rose. Are you excited? Rose, Yes, but only
Speaker 1: if it's positive. I'm your co host frand Toronto. You
Speaker 1: can find me at Franz Squish co on any social
Speaker 1: media you want. I'm Rose damn You. You can find
Speaker 1: me out Rose Damn You on Twitter and Instagram. You
Speaker 1: can subscribe to Like a Virgin anywhere you listen to podcasts,
Speaker 1: and definitely leave us a review because it helps brand
Speaker 1: new podcasts quite a lot. Like a Virgin is an
Speaker 1: I Heeart radio production. Our producer is Phoebe Unter, with
Speaker 1: support from Lindsay Hoffman, Julian Weller, Jess Crane Chitch and
Speaker 1: Nikki Etour. Until next week, See you later, Virgins Chow