1 00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:03,560 Speaker 1: My wife gave birth to a biracial baby, which clearly 2 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:06,160 Speaker 1: isn't mine, and I want a divorce, but what she 3 00:00:06,200 --> 00:00:08,040 Speaker 1: did next made it near impossible. 4 00:00:09,080 --> 00:00:11,240 Speaker 2: Let's see what is going to happen here. 5 00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:14,720 Speaker 1: A month ago, my wife gave birth to a black 6 00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:17,800 Speaker 1: baby girl. We are both white. 7 00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:21,479 Speaker 2: That's I mean, coming out of the gate. That's that's 8 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:24,480 Speaker 2: that's a big accusation, Like, how are you sure is 9 00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:25,520 Speaker 2: my initial? 10 00:00:25,960 --> 00:00:29,760 Speaker 1: Well, you know, I'm no, I'm no geneticist. 11 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:31,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, no domas. 12 00:00:31,200 --> 00:00:36,400 Speaker 1: I'm no no domas. I'm I'm not even a domas. 13 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:41,840 Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know shit, but uh, it seems 14 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:46,400 Speaker 1: like there might be some something. So she was forced 15 00:00:46,400 --> 00:00:48,400 Speaker 1: to admit that the child was a result of a 16 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:49,800 Speaker 1: one night stand last year. 17 00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:55,640 Speaker 2: Oh yo, so she just came out the gate like 18 00:00:56,320 --> 00:00:56,960 Speaker 2: this happened. 19 00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: Yeah. Also, man's shooting bullets from one night stand one 20 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:07,960 Speaker 1: night stand insta pregnant man shooting bullets. 21 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:10,120 Speaker 2: His swimmers with his swimmers would beat Michael Phelps. 22 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:13,679 Speaker 1: I know, man, good gravy. So I started the divorce proceedings, 23 00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:16,760 Speaker 1: although we're still living together for now. Between our two 24 00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:19,760 Speaker 1: boys age two and four, I've had paternity tests for 25 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:23,680 Speaker 1: them and they came back positive. So those kids are his, okay. 26 00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:26,360 Speaker 1: Between our two boys, age two and four, I've had 27 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:28,280 Speaker 1: paternity tests done for them and they came back positive. 28 00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:31,760 Speaker 1: Her infant daughter and her having lost her job to COVID, 29 00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:35,400 Speaker 1: living together as amicably as possible until the divorce is 30 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:38,000 Speaker 1: settled is an unfortunate necessity. 31 00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 2: Right, So he can't just like she technically could, but 32 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:43,080 Speaker 2: she'd be like her and the baby. 33 00:01:43,240 --> 00:01:45,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's bad. That's bad, Okay, Naturally, I have no 34 00:01:46,120 --> 00:01:49,480 Speaker 1: ill will towards the baby, and I've been disgusted by 35 00:01:49,480 --> 00:01:51,960 Speaker 1: some of the comments I've heard from family members, friends 36 00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:54,680 Speaker 1: and coworkers and others, all who seem to be fixated 37 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:57,640 Speaker 1: on the racial angle of this awful, as if the 38 00:01:57,640 --> 00:02:00,000 Speaker 1: most salient part of this isn't that my wife cheated, 39 00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:02,200 Speaker 1: but somehow it's with a black guy and that the 40 00:02:02,200 --> 00:02:05,520 Speaker 1: baby is black. But honestly, like this is, that's not that. 41 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:09,200 Speaker 1: What matters. What matters is the infidelity. And also I 42 00:02:09,240 --> 00:02:11,600 Speaker 1: love how like the husband is still trying to like 43 00:02:11,639 --> 00:02:15,400 Speaker 1: do right by life and by the kid, but like hot, damn, 44 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:18,760 Speaker 1: he should have you know seen this coming, Yes, like 45 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:20,880 Speaker 1: you should have researched her beforehand. Or something. 46 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:23,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. You can use public data check just to 47 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:24,359 Speaker 2: be sure, you know what I mean. 48 00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:26,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, you can look up people as like real names, 49 00:02:26,360 --> 00:02:30,000 Speaker 1: their addresses, criminal records, any skeletons that might be in 50 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:30,480 Speaker 1: the closet. 51 00:02:30,560 --> 00:02:32,639 Speaker 2: Exactly. So if you have someone that you're not too 52 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:35,239 Speaker 2: sure about, use public data check dot com or check 53 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:35,880 Speaker 2: our biolink. 54 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:40,160 Speaker 1: Oh well, back to the stories. So what really worries me, 55 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:43,040 Speaker 1: this is from Opie's perspective and my two sons, is 56 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,919 Speaker 1: that they might pick up on these narratives, like these 57 00:02:44,919 --> 00:02:47,040 Speaker 1: things that are going on. Right, they're too young to 58 00:02:47,040 --> 00:02:49,440 Speaker 1: really understand what's happening now, but I'm worried that as 59 00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:52,240 Speaker 1: they grow to understand the situation, that they might grow 60 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:55,880 Speaker 1: to resent their half sister for breaking up their parents' marriage. 61 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:59,880 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, wow, I didn't even that didn't cross my mind. 62 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:05,359 Speaker 1: He's thinking ahead, dude, he's thinking. He's thinking, so, I mean, 63 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:07,680 Speaker 1: for everything that's going on, he's thinking very clearly and 64 00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:10,400 Speaker 1: very empathetically, which is really cool. Yes, and worse, the 65 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:14,560 Speaker 1: resentment might express itself in a racist fashion. Yeah, under 66 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:17,120 Speaker 1: the influence of the aforementioned racist narratives. Right, like if 67 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:19,960 Speaker 1: all the coworkers and family are saying racist, then it's 68 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,200 Speaker 1: like the kids can pick up on it undred percent. 69 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:25,120 Speaker 1: Yeah damn, he's like playing forty chess over here. Yes, 70 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:27,560 Speaker 1: as he should be. Any thoughts on how I should 71 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:30,160 Speaker 1: try to influence my sons away from that perspective, It 72 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:31,840 Speaker 1: probably doesn't help that we live in a suburb with 73 00:03:31,919 --> 00:03:34,280 Speaker 1: very few black people and their half sister is really 74 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:38,200 Speaker 1: the only black person my children. Now, Oh boy, yikes, 75 00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:43,160 Speaker 1: Oh man, I don't know what well, just really quick, Yeah, 76 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,360 Speaker 1: there is an updates before we get into it. I 77 00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:46,360 Speaker 1: kind of hear what you think. 78 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:49,240 Speaker 2: One hundred percent. He should sit both of them down 79 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:53,280 Speaker 2: and like explain it, probably multiple times when as they. 80 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:57,400 Speaker 1: Grow up, do you think like now probably uh, if 81 00:03:57,440 --> 00:03:58,000 Speaker 1: they don't. 82 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:01,360 Speaker 2: So if he starts seeing any thing, he should do 83 00:04:01,360 --> 00:04:03,840 Speaker 2: it immediately. Yeah, there's no reason why not to do 84 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:06,360 Speaker 2: it immediately, But you gotta do it multiple times because 85 00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:10,640 Speaker 2: they won't unders remember now. But the subconscious biases can 86 00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:13,120 Speaker 2: like sink in early and be carried out, so so 87 00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:15,320 Speaker 2: you have like like do you check in two and four, 88 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:18,200 Speaker 2: like the like the two year old version of like, hey, 89 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:22,240 Speaker 2: you know, mommy and daddy are are going to live separately. 90 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:27,400 Speaker 1: This is your half sister. You know, she might not 91 00:04:27,440 --> 00:04:31,240 Speaker 1: look like you, but she is your sister and and 92 00:04:31,360 --> 00:04:31,839 Speaker 1: like you should. 93 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:33,599 Speaker 2: Yeah, there's no reason. There's no reason that you. 94 00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:35,680 Speaker 1: Should love her the same way to love her, feel. 95 00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:38,919 Speaker 2: Angry at her, or feel anything like you know that 96 00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:42,880 Speaker 2: wasn't And I think just having that conversation like multiple 97 00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:44,160 Speaker 2: times that's super smart. 98 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:46,880 Speaker 1: I've actually never thought about like I've always thought of that, like, oh, 99 00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: like when you had the sex talk with your kids, yeah, 100 00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:51,320 Speaker 1: or like stuff like that. Yeah, but like you can 101 00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:53,839 Speaker 1: you can just have that conversation multiple times at different levels. 102 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, because I'm sure different scenarios require this thing. But 103 00:04:57,680 --> 00:04:59,719 Speaker 2: this I think he has gonna be careful of any 104 00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:02,479 Speaker 2: s conscious biases sinking in. So do it now, do 105 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:04,840 Speaker 2: it early, and then just keep Just do it, and 106 00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:09,520 Speaker 2: they'll obviously understand way more once they're probably like eight, nine, ten, eleven, 107 00:05:09,640 --> 00:05:13,679 Speaker 2: they'll start it'll actually click exactly what he's what he's saying. 108 00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:16,000 Speaker 1: So there is an update. Oh. The big takeaway for 109 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:18,800 Speaker 1: me was that I'd need to lead by example here, 110 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:21,480 Speaker 1: not excluding her in any way because of her paternity, 111 00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:23,680 Speaker 1: so that she and my sons would see her as 112 00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:25,000 Speaker 1: a full member of the family. 113 00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:28,920 Speaker 2: That's great. Honestly, I've this approach is great. He's listening, 114 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:30,840 Speaker 2: he's asking very smart. 115 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:33,640 Speaker 1: Also, I need to be more active in confronting the 116 00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:36,479 Speaker 1: bigoted and ignorant nonsense I've been hearing and teach my 117 00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:39,000 Speaker 1: son to do the same and to protect their sister. 118 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:40,280 Speaker 2: Yes, definitely. 119 00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:43,400 Speaker 1: I spoken to some of those responsible since and made 120 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:45,600 Speaker 1: clear of my feelings on this and that she is 121 00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:47,760 Speaker 1: to be treated as a member of the family. And 122 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:50,400 Speaker 1: if I find out that they've ever said things like 123 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:52,760 Speaker 1: that to my sons or their sister, that they won't 124 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:54,360 Speaker 1: be allowed around us anymore. Good. 125 00:05:54,720 --> 00:05:55,479 Speaker 2: So what you gotta do. 126 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:57,960 Speaker 1: I've spoken to my wife about this. I love he's 127 00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:01,000 Speaker 1: still calling her his wife, not men's. 128 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:03,680 Speaker 2: I kind of hear people do that sometimes. 129 00:06:03,720 --> 00:06:05,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's rough. I mean when you think of someone 130 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:08,840 Speaker 1: for so long as your wife liked and we're more 131 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:11,599 Speaker 1: and less on the same page. She's been begging me 132 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:14,000 Speaker 1: to forgive her and not go through with the divorce. 133 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:16,560 Speaker 1: But that's not going to happen. Even if I didn't 134 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:19,960 Speaker 1: consider the cheating unforgivable, I just don't feel any love 135 00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:22,640 Speaker 1: for her anymore other than the platonic affection for her 136 00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:25,600 Speaker 1: as the mother of my children. My sons are handling 137 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:27,640 Speaker 1: this as well as can be expected. My four year 138 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:30,240 Speaker 1: old doesn't fully understand, but is upset by the change 139 00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:34,719 Speaker 1: in the household. Thankfully, he's easily distracted. Yeah, give him 140 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:39,960 Speaker 1: like some a three DS. That's dating me? Remember three D. 141 00:06:40,160 --> 00:06:45,440 Speaker 2: I guess that is dated. Huh psp, Yeah, that's old, 142 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:45,800 Speaker 2: that's old. 143 00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:46,000 Speaker 1: Ship. 144 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:49,560 Speaker 2: I remember the thing with A or DS. DS was 145 00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:53,880 Speaker 2: the first one D and I remember it was like 146 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:57,279 Speaker 2: you could send like written messages or something with like 147 00:06:57,320 --> 00:07:00,560 Speaker 2: people in your area, and that's how a certain thing started. 148 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:05,279 Speaker 2: What between kids? You know, you give a you know, 149 00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:09,080 Speaker 2: a twelve year old coming into puberty, no wayway or 150 00:07:09,160 --> 00:07:11,080 Speaker 2: just like messaging each other, you know what I mean, 151 00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:14,440 Speaker 2: like flirting and like your idea. I never had any 152 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:17,360 Speaker 2: that was like I didn't have a DS. What I 153 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,040 Speaker 2: witn I witnessed? 154 00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:21,640 Speaker 1: Whoa I like drawn? Like dirty pictures. 155 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:24,640 Speaker 2: They're just like, yeah, getting getting freaky with it. Whoa 156 00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:25,200 Speaker 2: O sexting? 157 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:28,560 Speaker 1: No way, that's crazy. My two year old is thankfully 158 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:30,920 Speaker 1: too young to comprehend what's going on, but has definitely 159 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:33,480 Speaker 1: picked up on how withdrawn his mother has become. They're 160 00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:36,400 Speaker 1: both fascinated with their new little sister. So there's that 161 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:39,880 Speaker 1: silver lining. That's good. My wife isn't in good shape 162 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:43,320 Speaker 1: at all. She's depressed even before birth, and now with 163 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 1: everything our divorce or infidelity being revealed, in the backlash 164 00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:50,080 Speaker 1: from family and friends, postpartum depression, and the exhaustion from 165 00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:53,680 Speaker 1: raising an infant, she's barely functional. Oh man, She's seeing 166 00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:56,080 Speaker 1: a therapist, and I've been pressuring some of our family 167 00:07:56,120 --> 00:07:58,560 Speaker 1: and friends to be supportive of her, because even if 168 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:00,800 Speaker 1: they think she deserves it in her current state, it's 169 00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:02,520 Speaker 1: still making it harder for me and our children. 170 00:08:02,600 --> 00:08:05,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, it makes sense. It's like why he get her 171 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:08,720 Speaker 2: to understand the error for ways and growth from it, Like, Noah, 172 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:11,160 Speaker 2: Like I don't think continually punishing. 173 00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:12,440 Speaker 1: How much she still has to be the mother to 174 00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:14,720 Speaker 1: that other exact two kids. So you don't want her 175 00:08:14,760 --> 00:08:17,760 Speaker 1: to completely just go off the rails, right, She needs 176 00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:22,240 Speaker 1: some support also, I'm just realizing right now, like he 177 00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:25,840 Speaker 1: didn't find out until the baby was born. Like imagine 178 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:29,600 Speaker 1: being in the waiting room or in the in the 179 00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:31,600 Speaker 1: birthing room, I don't know what they call it, and 180 00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:34,760 Speaker 1: like you're just like, that's not my baby. 181 00:08:35,080 --> 00:08:39,880 Speaker 2: Dude, that would be fucked that. Really, I didn't even 182 00:08:39,880 --> 00:08:42,840 Speaker 2: think about it because you have because there's the delivery room. 183 00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:47,000 Speaker 2: But for nine months, yeah, up to it. That's my kid, 184 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:48,880 Speaker 2: this is your child. You're getting ready like you're just 185 00:08:48,920 --> 00:08:54,520 Speaker 2: mentally and then that like that switch up is just insane. 186 00:08:54,559 --> 00:08:58,920 Speaker 1: Can you imagine? And so that would be so fucked Wow. 187 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:01,440 Speaker 1: It's become very very obvious to me that even athlete 188 00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:03,360 Speaker 1: and divorce is finalized, we're going to have to live 189 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:05,800 Speaker 1: together for a while. She's in no shape to be 190 00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:08,360 Speaker 1: taking care of three kids without someone else around to 191 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:10,640 Speaker 1: support her, and I'm not willing to deprive her of 192 00:09:10,679 --> 00:09:13,880 Speaker 1: her sons by seeking soul custody. It's also too difficult financially. 193 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:15,600 Speaker 1: She's lost her job because of COVID. Like what you 194 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:19,160 Speaker 1: gotta do again? Salute to you, Opie. This is good stuff. 195 00:09:19,440 --> 00:09:21,880 Speaker 1: As for the baby girl, she's healthy and fairly easy 196 00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:24,760 Speaker 1: by baby standards. Since I've been helping take care for her, 197 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:27,400 Speaker 1: I've bonded with her and I've discussed the possibility of 198 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:30,160 Speaker 1: adopting her with my wife. She can't contact the father 199 00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:32,400 Speaker 1: as the only thing she knows about him is his 200 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:33,120 Speaker 1: first name. 201 00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:40,960 Speaker 2: Damn, bro, Come on, Opie's wife. Come on, oh God, 202 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:44,920 Speaker 2: oh watched that name be a fake name? 203 00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:49,360 Speaker 1: Yeah? Damn bro. And given our co parenting situation, it 204 00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:51,760 Speaker 1: feels like adopting her as my daughter would be the 205 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:55,400 Speaker 1: best outcome for all involved. However, there's been a wrench 206 00:09:55,520 --> 00:09:57,800 Speaker 1: thrown in that plan. It was brought to my attention 207 00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:00,720 Speaker 1: that there may be a way of finding the baby's father, 208 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:05,160 Speaker 1: namely by having her DNA tested by ancestry DNA. If 209 00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:07,400 Speaker 1: the father or one of the relatives has also taken 210 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,640 Speaker 1: the test, we may be able to find him through 211 00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:11,280 Speaker 1: the DNA match database. 212 00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,200 Speaker 2: Aha. 213 00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:14,480 Speaker 1: If I'm being completely honest, I'm not happy about this. 214 00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:16,960 Speaker 1: I've already started to think of this baby girl as 215 00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:20,200 Speaker 1: my daughter, and having him in our lives would massively 216 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:23,000 Speaker 1: complicate the family dynamic. Plus we live in Seattle and 217 00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:26,079 Speaker 1: she met him in Philadelphia, so god knows how they'd 218 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:28,720 Speaker 1: even make that work if they wanted to. However, I 219 00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:31,520 Speaker 1: recognize that this is a selfish reaction. Man is being 220 00:10:31,679 --> 00:10:34,800 Speaker 1: the most unselfish man in the universe right here. If 221 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,000 Speaker 1: we have the chance of finding her biological father, we 222 00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:39,360 Speaker 1: owe it to her to do so, if only so 223 00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:41,959 Speaker 1: that she has the access to her paternal medical history, 224 00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:44,200 Speaker 1: and so she can have a relationship with him if 225 00:10:44,200 --> 00:10:46,839 Speaker 1: and when she chooses to do so. I've read a 226 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:49,600 Speaker 1: few accounts by children raised by non biological parents, and 227 00:10:49,679 --> 00:10:52,040 Speaker 1: a common thread is their desire to meet their lost 228 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:56,000 Speaker 1: biological parent. So that's that We've ordered an ancestry DNA 229 00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:58,640 Speaker 1: kit for her, and I guess we'll decide on our 230 00:10:58,679 --> 00:11:01,280 Speaker 1: next steps once we get results back in a couple 231 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:01,800 Speaker 1: of months. 232 00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:08,040 Speaker 2: That's so challenging because it's like that person isn't expecting it. 233 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:11,280 Speaker 2: You have no idea if he wants any interaction with 234 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:14,400 Speaker 2: the kid or not, and it and just by introducing 235 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:17,600 Speaker 2: it the family dynamic like you said, could yeah, you know, 236 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,839 Speaker 2: so you start fighting for or if he do he 237 00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:22,920 Speaker 2: does once it, then he could start fighting for custody 238 00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:26,360 Speaker 2: and then that you know, wow, that's. 239 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:28,199 Speaker 1: This kid's is why you don't cheat in your marriage. 240 00:11:28,440 --> 00:11:29,120 Speaker 2: What would you do? 241 00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:30,000 Speaker 1: Would I do? 242 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:30,600 Speaker 2: I mean? 243 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:34,040 Speaker 1: I think I think I think we know what the 244 00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:36,160 Speaker 1: right thing to do is. Yeah, well is it? You know? 245 00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:38,040 Speaker 1: Is it the right thing? Well? So here's it's like, well, 246 00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:42,760 Speaker 1: will it will it hurt? The will it hurt? How 247 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:44,480 Speaker 1: this baby girl is going to be raised? 248 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:48,200 Speaker 2: I think I think it's fair to first do the 249 00:11:48,280 --> 00:11:51,320 Speaker 2: DNA test. But yeah, I guess it is the right 250 00:11:51,360 --> 00:11:56,960 Speaker 2: thing by the person, by the the person OPI's wife 251 00:11:57,040 --> 00:11:59,360 Speaker 2: cheated with, because at the end of the day, that 252 00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:02,720 Speaker 2: is their kid and they should know about it. But yeah, 253 00:12:02,720 --> 00:12:07,480 Speaker 2: it does, it does, PoTA. There's the risk of making 254 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,200 Speaker 2: things just way less than the artist. I guess. I 255 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:10,760 Speaker 2: guess it is. 256 00:12:11,280 --> 00:12:14,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, It's like I think in this situation is who 257 00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:15,800 Speaker 1: do you want to do right by? Do you want 258 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 1: to do right by the baby girl or this guy? 259 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:20,440 Speaker 1: And I feel like it might be more important to 260 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:21,400 Speaker 1: do right by the baby girl. 261 00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:22,560 Speaker 2: It should be. 262 00:12:22,840 --> 00:12:26,120 Speaker 1: It's freaking complicated. Yeah, what would you do? Yeah? 263 00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:29,720 Speaker 2: Comment below what you do and why, because I'm We're stumped. 264 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:30,319 Speaker 1: We're stumped. 265 00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:32,679 Speaker 2: If you thought this story was crazy, check out this 266 00:12:32,720 --> 00:12:35,000 Speaker 2: one where the step mom tries to steal the baby. 267 00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,679 Speaker 2: What's right here or check the link in the description.