Speaker 1: Hey, everyone, Robert Evans here, and this is the week
Speaker 1: we take off for all of wool Zone Media, so
Speaker 1: we do not put out new episodes this week, so
Speaker 1: everyone can actually get a break at the company. Takes
Speaker 1: some time. We've done this before. We decided this year
Speaker 1: that we would actually put out reruns of old episodes,
Speaker 1: you know, with little introductions from us that we recorded
Speaker 1: more recently. This is largely stuff that we thought should
Speaker 1: have gotten more attention, you know, maybe it came out
Speaker 1: when we were smaller, and we want to put it
Speaker 1: back in front of folks again. So there will be episodes,
Speaker 1: you know, reruns of it could happen here, reruns of politics,
Speaker 1: runs of everything that we do. And this is the
Speaker 1: rerun of Behind the Bastards. And you know, we love
Speaker 1: talking about guys like Hitler, specifically Hitler over here, you know,
Speaker 1: like like the History Channel of old He's always an
Speaker 1: entertaining fellow. And I did an episode a few years
Speaker 1: back back when we were still working out of la
Speaker 1: still recording from the studio about his sexuality, right, because
Speaker 1: there's a lot of myths and a lot of just
Speaker 1: like bullshit that comes out about you know, Hitler's relationships
Speaker 1: his romantic life, all that kind of stuff. It's usually
Speaker 1: you know, nonsense that's kind of deliberately exaggerated to try
Speaker 1: and get eyeballs on something in order to, you know,
Speaker 1: for somebody's financial bottom line. So I did a really
Speaker 1: deep dive into like what we know about his actual
Speaker 1: sex life, about his actual like how he was as
Speaker 1: a romantic partner, all that good stuff. And it's both
Speaker 1: very different from the story that I think people tend
Speaker 1: to get in popular media, and I think more interesting,
Speaker 1: more more useful in understanding the man as a human
Speaker 1: being and like why he was the kind of guy
Speaker 1: that he was. So without further ado, here's how Hitler fucked.
Speaker 1: A serious title that they would not let me actually
Speaker 1: use for these episodes. Introduction, I'm Robert Evans. This is
Speaker 1: Behind the Bastards, the podcast we tell you everything you
Speaker 1: don't know about the very worst people in all of history.
Speaker 1: With me today is Brandy Posey. Hell. Hello, are you
Speaker 1: doing Brandy?
Speaker 2: I'm doing pretty great. I'm excited to get into this.
Speaker 1: Brandy. You are a stand up comedian. Get any pluggables
Speaker 1: to kick off at the start here? Uh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I tore around quite a bit. You can go
Speaker 2: to Brandyposey dot com Brandy with an Ie Posey with
Speaker 2: an Ey for all of my tour dates. I also
Speaker 2: have a podcast called Lady to Lady that is very,
Speaker 2: very fun. We've had a lot of really awesome past guests,
Speaker 2: like Margaret trow On French Stewart, So come check that
Speaker 2: out too.
Speaker 1: Normally we work all that out ahead of time and
Speaker 1: I introduce it. But Sophie isn't here, and as you
Speaker 1: can tell, like everything, everything's a nightmare.
Speaker 2: It's okay, you you have like a terror in your eyes.
Speaker 1: Oh, it's it's horrifying. The thought of not knowing what
Speaker 1: to do. I don't know how to do. I don't
Speaker 1: know what we're gonna do. Ad breaks, this is this
Speaker 1: is the end for all of us.
Speaker 2: Do you want me to count something down for you?
Speaker 1: No? No, I should I put it.
Speaker 2: On a Sophie wig of some kind. That what will
Speaker 2: calm your nerves properly for this recording.
Speaker 1: The only possible thing to do in the face of
Speaker 1: chaos is to just completely yield to the chaos and
Speaker 1: give up even trying to structure the show perfect. Sounds great, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that's I think that's the plan.
Speaker 2: Okay, explains why you're standing on the table.
Speaker 1: Great, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Now, Brandy, Yes, today we
Speaker 1: have a subject that is near and dear to no
Speaker 1: one's hearts, but more important than I think a lot
Speaker 1: of people give it credit to. Today we're talking about
Speaker 1: how Hitler fucked Ooh, so.
Speaker 2: Glad you called me for this? Yeah, I'm flattered.
Speaker 1: You want to talk about Stalin and his his love
Speaker 1: of pranks and uh DJing and drinking more than anyone
Speaker 1: else now and.
Speaker 2: Fucking Hitler feels like a prank?
Speaker 1: Yeah, well maybe.
Speaker 2: Or maybe not. I can't my my predictions out of
Speaker 2: the gate. Can I give a prediction?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I'm very curious for that.
Speaker 2: Not a generous lover, okay, And also gonna say this,
Speaker 2: not going to shame somebody for having a small penis
Speaker 2: because that is outside of your control. But real angry guy.
Speaker 2: I have a feeling he probably has a little guy.
Speaker 1: The funny thing about Hitler because Hitler, Hitler's like the
Speaker 1: one person people have talked about more than any other
Speaker 1: single person. Yes, story, I've always be written about him
Speaker 1: and whatnot. Everything you just talked about, the possibility had
Speaker 1: a micro penis, the possibility he was not a generous lover.
Speaker 1: This has all been debated by like elderly scholars from
Speaker 1: Stanford and Cambridge at link, Like that's one of the
Speaker 1: fun things about Hitler studies is that, like that question
Speaker 1: about whether or not he had a micro penis, like
Speaker 1: the CIA's weighed in, like it's a thing, of course.
Speaker 2: Imagine dedicating your career to that, Like, mom, dad, I'm
Speaker 2: majoring in Hitler Dick.
Speaker 1: Well, just Hitler studies in general. If you're going to
Speaker 1: be into Hitler studies, you're gonna have some questions about
Speaker 1: his dick. Yeah, pH dick, pH dick in Hitler's fucking
Speaker 1: This is not going to be the most adult episode
Speaker 1: in certain points, but uh, I'm good with that. I
Speaker 1: think you'll be surprised where it goes.
Speaker 2: Every pretty well, I do like that in front of
Speaker 2: me on the table while recording. We do have a
Speaker 2: product called a Purina busy bone, which is just right
Speaker 2: on the table in front of me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, speaking of busy bones, yes, Hitler's it's debatable. It's
Speaker 1: all very very heavily.
Speaker 2: His bone didn't get very busy, lazy bone.
Speaker 1: It's possible his bone got a lot busier than people
Speaker 1: give him credit for There's a lot of debate around
Speaker 1: this topic. There's even a lot of debate about the
Speaker 1: nature of his genitals. In addition to the question that
Speaker 1: like the OSS, the precursor of the CIA, talked a
Speaker 1: lot about like whether or not get a micro penis.
Speaker 1: Based on some interviews with some people, there's a hypothesis
Speaker 1: that a goat bit off his dick when he was
Speaker 1: very young, and that that was the secret of his madness,
Speaker 1: that he a goat bit his dick.
Speaker 2: You want that to be true.
Speaker 1: That a lot of people did like you again, where's
Speaker 1: that under statue? I mean, we don't want to we
Speaker 1: don't want to celebrate that goat if it's the secret
Speaker 1: to Hitler's madness.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that's true.
Speaker 1: That's true now, and we're not going to get into
Speaker 1: much of that. There's also a theory that he had
Speaker 1: one ball and there was like a song during the
Speaker 1: war Hitler has only got one ball, Goerring has two
Speaker 1: but very small Nana Nana Nana. That was like a
Speaker 1: British ditty. But there were real rumors about it.
Speaker 2: Is that where that that melody comes from?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: Or is that a weird al parody about it.
Speaker 1: Was, I mean, weird al hadn't been conceived of yet. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like it was a it was a parody of that
Speaker 1: like tune. It's just an easy tune to mix a
Speaker 1: song too about Shitler's testicles.
Speaker 2: I just wanted to make sure that that wasn't like
Speaker 2: what that original song was, because it was like, how
Speaker 2: is that not a fact in my lexicon?
Speaker 1: At this point, we have interviews with a couple of
Speaker 1: different doctors who, you know, pile paid Hitler's genitals because
Speaker 1: that's what doctors do, and they all say perfectly normal.
Speaker 1: So there's no hard evidence of that, but it has
Speaker 1: been debated a lot, and I do think it's important
Speaker 1: that people know for historical context that when bombs were
Speaker 1: raining down on London, yes, people were comforting themselves with
Speaker 1: songs about Hitler and Gerring's genitalia.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, I'm pretty into that for sure.
Speaker 1: It's great. It's great.
Speaker 2: Nothing cuts to the core quite like a parody song.
Speaker 1: No it doesn't. Let's uh, I've deeper into this.
Speaker 2: Well, let's get in there. Let's just get on in there.
Speaker 1: So, as you might guess by the fact that I
Speaker 1: wasn't even holding up my notes for that whole discussion
Speaker 1: about Hitler's genitalia and the rumors about it. I am
Speaker 1: what you might call a Hitler nerd. I've read enough
Speaker 1: biographies of the man that I've started reading books about Hitler,
Speaker 1: biographies that are essentially comparing all of the different biographies
Speaker 1: of Hitler, and like like biographies about writing biographies about Hitler.
Speaker 1: It's a problem. Yeah, yeah, it's not good.
Speaker 2: Do you have like a shell, is it like a
Speaker 2: shelf in your house or do you have like a
Speaker 2: cloth in front of it?
Speaker 1: You know, I own a couple of physical copies, but
Speaker 1: for the show, I get too many books, Like I
Speaker 1: just have everything i'd kindle, like I usually am buying
Speaker 1: sometimes two or three in a week, Like, it just
Speaker 1: take too long.
Speaker 2: It's better to have that all digital. Well, although I
Speaker 2: think if you were to actually see the titles laid
Speaker 2: out in front of you physically, you'd be like.
Speaker 1: Oh, there's things that would be that would be nicer,
Speaker 1: but it would I think it would take a lot
Speaker 1: longer to put together episodes. Fair, Okay, Well, the point
Speaker 1: of this is that I tend to be on the
Speaker 1: cutting edge of new Hitler recis in terms of like
Speaker 1: what I'm reading. I'm not doing new Hitler research, but
Speaker 1: I so speaking of that. A couple of days ago,
Speaker 1: I was actively looking for a new Hitler fact to
Speaker 1: just see if any had come out in the last
Speaker 1: couple of months since I'd checked that, and I came
Speaker 1: across an article in The Independent called Hitler was a
Speaker 1: sexually confused serial killer, psychologist claims in new book. So
Speaker 1: that's quite a claim.
Speaker 2: So I think you can also probably just say serial killer,
Speaker 2: because I think most serial killers have got, you know,
Speaker 2: their wires crossed.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean it's interesting the term confused for serial
Speaker 1: killer because I wonder if like a guy like Ted
Speaker 1: Bundy probably wouldn't be Like, No, I wasn't confused. I
Speaker 1: just this is what I wanted to do.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, the confusion came from wherever
Speaker 2: the wiring crossed in the first place. Yeah. He's very
Speaker 2: matter of fact about Yeah.
Speaker 1: And the book that apparently makes these claims is titled
Speaker 1: Hitler Won and Hitler Two, The Sexual No Man's Land.
Speaker 1: It's by a best selling German author and psychiatry christ
Speaker 1: named Vulcar Ellis Pilgrim.
Speaker 2: And is that like a new like it's a very
Speaker 2: dark cat in the hat Hitler one and Hitler two. Ye,
Speaker 2: the cat and the hat go and they.
Speaker 1: Just Hitler won and Hitler two. Yeah, they can do
Speaker 1: anything anything. Oh no, don't do the.
Speaker 2: Sun and rad It's a white supremacist parody right there.
Speaker 1: Yeah for sure. Yeah, some some Nazi listening in is
Speaker 1: already hard at work on that.
Speaker 2: Not the Doctor SEUs version.
Speaker 1: I haven't gotten to read that book because it's only
Speaker 1: in German and I do not read German, which is
Speaker 1: almost the title of a great podcast. There's a podcast
Speaker 1: called I Don't Speak German about the alt right that
Speaker 1: people should listen to if they want. It's kind of
Speaker 1: like my show, but way more focused on that one
Speaker 1: narrow group of people. Great podcasts anyway, I don't read German. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't read German. Podcast is called I don't Speak German.
Speaker 1: Cool Anyway. I couldn't find the book, but I did
Speaker 1: find some claims that are in the book In this article,
Speaker 1: Hitler was a Adolf Hitler was a actually confused serial
Speaker 1: killer whose violence was driven by lust. In his new book,
Speaker 1: mister Volker claims the Nazi leader had an orgasm while
Speaker 1: watching a film in which Austrian soldiers massacre French troops.
Speaker 1: Now this kind of story is a treat for me
Speaker 1: because I'd never heard of this particular Hitler story before.
Speaker 1: I'm always I'm always looking out for some new h facts.
Speaker 1: So quote, he quotes Mary Anne Hopp, an actress who
Speaker 1: was an acquaintance of Hitler, describing a time that she went
Speaker 1: to the cinema in the Dictator's Berlin palace to watch
Speaker 1: a film called The Rebel. It featured Austrian troops hurling
Speaker 1: boulders from a mountain onto the French below. Hitler got
Speaker 1: some kind of thrill and rubbed his knees at this
Speaker 1: event as the stones rolled down on the French and groaned.
Speaker 1: I don't know if he was crazy, but he got
Speaker 1: some kind of orgasm. She said, I wanted to leave
Speaker 1: during the show. The man was creepy.
Speaker 2: Yeah. People gave pee Wee Herman a hard time.
Speaker 1: People gave Pee Wee Herman a hard time. You know
Speaker 1: Hitler in perspective.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you compare the two pee we should get
Speaker 2: the statue.
Speaker 1: I feel like Pee Wee should have just left to
Speaker 1: masturbate in that theater. But that's what that theater was for.
Speaker 1: It's what the theater was for its not like he
Speaker 1: was showing up at the cinemark to like showing anyway. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'd been unable to yeah, find an English translation. But
Speaker 1: in this article mister would apparently talk to the author.
Speaker 1: Pilgrim talks about how he suspects there's a connection between
Speaker 1: sexuality and violence and Hitler, and that his sexual excitement
Speaker 1: at the thought of violence gave him the desire to
Speaker 1: force men into killing. He says, however, since this lust
Speaker 1: for killing is the decisive feature of serial killers, the
Speaker 1: question inevitably arises. Was Hitler a serial killer who murdered
Speaker 1: for the purpose of his gratification? Hitler's sexuality, I believe
Speaker 1: drove the dictator into the most colossal annihilation that man
Speaker 1: has witnessed. Now that's that's this guy's claims and uh,
Speaker 1: interesting premise. I can see why a lot of people
Speaker 1: would want to believe that. Yeah. Mister Pilgrim also speculates
Speaker 1: about Hitler's sex life, claiming he abstained from sexual relations
Speaker 1: with his mistress and then wife, Eva Brown. Now this
Speaker 1: all sounds I think to a lot of people. They
Speaker 1: might read this and be like, Okay, well this seems
Speaker 1: you know, of course, he was crazy. Maybe that makes
Speaker 1: him he was just a serial killer who wound up
Speaker 1: in charge of the country. Yeah, I get why people
Speaker 1: would want to believe that. I think what most people
Speaker 1: looking at that wouldn't dig into is kind of where
Speaker 1: the guy is basing his claims on. And most of
Speaker 1: them come from a dude called Ernst han Stangle. Another
Speaker 1: nickname was Putsi, and Ernst was a classic classic Putsy.
Speaker 1: Ernst was a friend of Hitler's back in the day
Speaker 1: who then started hating him.
Speaker 2: And I'm sure that happened with a lot of Hitler's friend.
Speaker 1: That happened were not great at keeping friends, not super
Speaker 1: good at friends.
Speaker 2: I'll be like, oh God, just do I have to
Speaker 2: answer keep answering this call.
Speaker 1: I think that might surprise a lot of people. Not
Speaker 1: a good friend, yeah, not dictators in general. Not great friends,
Speaker 1: no not.
Speaker 2: They just take and they take and they take.
Speaker 1: They take and they take and they take. Some of
Speaker 1: them are fun to drink with, yeah, once or twice.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Like, if I could go back in time and just
Speaker 1: see Stalin and all of his buddies, how drunk they,
Speaker 1: of course I would want to try. I wouldn't want
Speaker 1: to be drunk around Hitler. No, but Hitler didn't get drunk.
Speaker 1: He was a teetotler, right, he was a t totally yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean he was on meth a lot, but that
Speaker 1: was a doctor giving it to him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so he yeah, so he thought that he was
Speaker 2: being medicated.
Speaker 1: He thought that, and that was you know that when
Speaker 1: we talk about that, and there's a great book called
Speaker 1: Blitz about that. Well, I'm sure we'll talk about it someday,
Speaker 1: but like that was mostly later in the war, during
Speaker 1: his rise to power. He's sober, Like every now and
Speaker 1: then you'll hear a story of him drinking like part
Speaker 1: of a glass of champagne. But he was like yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: which is you know, control freaks and whatnot. So I
Speaker 1: get the the desire to like psycho analyze Hitler, but
Speaker 1: going to Homstangle for like advice, because hams Stangle has
Speaker 1: a long time been claiming that Hitler was basically a newter,
Speaker 1: was like couldn't get off. Yah, yeah, it had like
Speaker 1: no sexual life. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well, and that is a thing with a lot of
Speaker 2: seri killers, where like they just can't come until they
Speaker 2: find the thing that makes them right.
Speaker 1: Yeah. That and if you think of Hitler as a
Speaker 1: serial killer. A lot of this stuff makes sense. But
Speaker 1: I think what most people don't realize when they hear
Speaker 1: stories like this about every year or two, there will
Speaker 1: be a new rash of Hitler's sex life stories that yeah,
Speaker 1: little hit like kind of shadier but not entirely bullshit
Speaker 1: outlets and stuff, and then every now and then someone
Speaker 1: like The New York will give it a write up
Speaker 1: or whatnot. None of this is new in the field
Speaker 1: of hitlerology. And in fact, like all of these claims,
Speaker 1: any claim that you like read about and like a
Speaker 1: modern paper about, like Hitler liking to poop on people,
Speaker 1: or the possibility that Hitler was gay, all that stuff
Speaker 1: was kicking around in the nineteen thirties. Yeah, so there's
Speaker 1: a lot of myths around this guy. And so what
Speaker 1: I want to kind of do today is first give
Speaker 1: kind of an overview of the myths that people are
Speaker 1: still telling about Hitler and kind of the latest couple
Speaker 1: of waves of this, and then we're gonna do a
Speaker 1: really deep dive into his whole sexual history, his relationships,
Speaker 1: everything that there is about him in like reputable like scholarship.
Speaker 2: So jeez, so if you and Hitler matched on tender
Speaker 2: and you wanted to google him to find out what
Speaker 2: was really going on. This would be the episode to
Speaker 2: listen to.
Speaker 1: This would be the episode to listen to. And spoiler alert,
Speaker 1: don't date Hitler. No, don't date Hitler, No, don't Probably
Speaker 1: not going to go well. Yeah. So, back in like
Speaker 1: March of twenty sixteen, I came across an article in
Speaker 1: the Daily Star with the title Adolf Hitler was gay
Speaker 1: and loved teenage boys. CIA files claim. There was also
Speaker 1: a New York Post article around the same time with
Speaker 1: the title Adolf Hitler had a truly discussing sexual fetish.
Speaker 1: It's equally emblematic of like those types of articles. Yeah,
Speaker 1: these were all like spring of twenty sixteen wave articles,
Speaker 1: and they were all based on a dossier the OSS,
Speaker 1: which is like a precursor of the CIA put together
Speaker 1: quote from the New York Post. The Nazi leader's bedroom
Speaker 1: habits included a love of Pooh sex, claims the dossier
Speaker 1: from the office of Yeah, so.
Speaker 2: Which is was shit not dressing up like Winnie.
Speaker 1: The Pooh, not dressing up like Winnie the Pooh and
Speaker 1: looking for honey. Yeah. The intelligence document says that he
Speaker 1: liked women to stand over him and defecate because he
Speaker 1: was turned on by Pooh. This is the New York
Speaker 1: Post keeps using the word pooh instead of feces, which
Speaker 1: just doesn't seem like great journalism. It also revealed the
Speaker 1: fur had a micro penis, and, as the famous song suggests,
Speaker 1: only one test. It also revealed he liked to be
Speaker 1: brutally kicked by women as part of his sex games.
Speaker 1: So again, this is always presented whenever it comes up
Speaker 1: in the media. Is new. This is all older than
Speaker 1: your grandparents.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this has been around forever.
Speaker 1: It's been around forever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1: This is Yeah. So the root of most of the
Speaker 1: salacious Hitler fuck myths is that infamous oss report titled
Speaker 1: The Mind of Adolf Hitler, was compiled by a doctor
Speaker 1: named Langer and was initially a secret thing that was
Speaker 1: written up as a brief for FDR at the start
Speaker 1: of World War Two. It's based on a lot of
Speaker 1: interviews and original documents and the source book behind the paper,
Speaker 1: which is like all of the raw sources that they
Speaker 1: compiled to write This is a gold mine of info.
Speaker 1: But we should be really critical about the dossier itself.
Speaker 1: It has to be taken with as much salt as
Speaker 1: you'd prescribe something written by a psychologist in the nineteen forties,
Speaker 1: because it's filled with really debatable conclusions based on bad
Speaker 1: psychoanalytic theory. I'm going to read you one excerpt where
Speaker 1: doctor Langer tries to explain why Hitler always carried around
Speaker 1: a whip as a young man. Quote. Anyone who has
Speaker 1: ever seeing Hitler talking in a bashful and puerile way
Speaker 1: to a woman would easily be led to believe that
Speaker 1: in marriage he would be the underdog. But that is
Speaker 1: manifestly wrong. It would seem that the whip plays some
Speaker 1: mysterious role in his relationship to women. In doctor Sedgwick's opinion,
Speaker 1: during the almost fifteen years of association with Hitler, the
Speaker 1: whip with which Hitler loves to gesticulate figures as a
Speaker 1: kind of substitute or auxiliary symbol for his missing sexual potency.
Speaker 1: All this wielding of the whip seems to be connected
Speaker 1: with a hidden desire on the part of Hitler for
Speaker 1: some state of erection which would overcome his fundamental sexual
Speaker 1: inferiority complex. The truth is that Hitler is, in all probabilities,
Speaker 1: still in the stage of puberty and still in the
Speaker 1: essential meaning of the word a virgin.
Speaker 2: I want to take that guy to a renfest. Yeah,
Speaker 2: just take a look around.
Speaker 1: What do you make of this?
Speaker 2: Yeah, what do you think is going on here?
Speaker 1: And when he references doctor Sedgwick, that's Hans Schnangle. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so this is again all based on that guy. A
Speaker 1: lot of this is based on that guy stuff. But
Speaker 1: like Hitler, Hitler was definitely not a virgin in nineteen
Speaker 1: forty two.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no whip for sure. How old was
Speaker 2: he when he into World War One? Do you know?
Speaker 1: Because he was in his mid twenties. He was in
Speaker 1: the trenches the whole time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, okay, I gotcha. So probably not even a
Speaker 2: virgin at that point.
Speaker 1: It's debatable. We'll get into that a little bit. So. Uh,
Speaker 1: just as we kind of criticized that whips were really
Speaker 1: common among German fascists to be used as weapons and
Speaker 1: street fights at this time, and Hitler used his whip
Speaker 1: in street fights a lot. He also used it to
Speaker 1: flirt with girls a lot. So we'll talk about that some.
Speaker 2: I that's pretty cool.
Speaker 1: It was pretty hardcore, like.
Speaker 2: The idea of like a drive by whipping back of
Speaker 2: the day.
Speaker 1: It was more like a bunch of guys they would
Speaker 1: give speeches in these like beer halls because it's a
Speaker 1: big thing in German culture, and like a bunch of
Speaker 1: anti fascists would crowd around them, and like they would
Speaker 1: start throwing bottles and fighting, and like fucking Hitler would
Speaker 1: pull out his whip and start like swinging whips and
Speaker 1: people and stuff. And you can fuck a dude up
Speaker 1: with Yeah, you can decent with it.
Speaker 2: Holy shit.
Speaker 1: It's a good weapon if you're gonna like beat on
Speaker 1: somebody in a bar. Yeah, And it worked for that purpose.
Speaker 2: And give Antifa all the whips now.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I mean they take a lot of training,
Speaker 1: but yeaheah, yeah yeah. I like Indiana Jones reclaiming the
Speaker 1: whip for the not fascist side of things.
Speaker 2: Appreciate that I've never heard the Hitler whip thing.
Speaker 1: Hitler loved Whitz. You're going to be hearing a lot
Speaker 1: about Hitler's whip today. Yeah. So, anyway, because of all
Speaker 1: of this misinformation, because of all of these like conclusions
Speaker 1: that people still tried out based on like fucking nineteen
Speaker 1: forty psychoanalytic theory, I have gone through two different Hitler biographies,
Speaker 1: the ones I considered probably the two best, John Totlan's
Speaker 1: and Ian Kershaw's, as well as a great book called
Speaker 1: Explaining Hitler. That's like a synthesis of a bunch of
Speaker 1: different biographies, and I've tried to present what I think
Speaker 1: is the most complete picture of the verifiable facts of
Speaker 1: Hitler's sex life. So, anyway, if we're going to understand
Speaker 1: how Hitler fucked and how people talk about how Hitler fucked,
Speaker 1: we have to start with Hitler's sexual prehistory. What we
Speaker 1: know about how his dad fucked. Oh, or to be
Speaker 1: more precise, who his dad fucked?
Speaker 2: Ooh, well, his mom at.
Speaker 1: Least definitely his mom, that's a given.
Speaker 2: At least at least twice, right, because he had a sister,
Speaker 2: you younger sister.
Speaker 1: Or something, right, Yeah, I think she was a half sister.
Speaker 1: You know, I don't remember that off the top of
Speaker 1: my head. His genealogy is very complicated.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so there was a younger girl. There was a
Speaker 2: girl in a room in his house.
Speaker 1: Girl. Yeah, Paula Hitler. He had a sister, and he
Speaker 1: actually like one of the nice things Hitler did in
Speaker 1: his life is that, as a younger man, he gave
Speaker 1: her his inheritance and like wound up kind of on
Speaker 1: the street as a result of that because she had
Speaker 1: a kid and stuff.
Speaker 2: Got it okay.
Speaker 1: So one thing we leave out a lot when we
Speaker 1: talk about Hitler's rise to power is the army of
Speaker 1: crusading journalists who fought a desperate battle to stop him
Speaker 1: from taking control. They failed, obviously, and a lot of
Speaker 1: them died. But for a while, their investigation scared Hitler
Speaker 1: more than anything. He was frightened that his family history
Speaker 1: would be exposed. When he learned about one of the
Speaker 1: first of these investigations, he allegedly told a party member,
Speaker 1: people must not know who I am. They must not
Speaker 1: know where I come from. WHOA Now. There are a
Speaker 1: lot of different rumors as to why. The most salacious
Speaker 1: rumors that Hitler secretly had a Jewish background. We don't
Speaker 1: know for certain who his father's father was. His grandmother,
Speaker 1: Maria Schickelgruber, was a forty two year old, unmarried serving
Speaker 1: woman when she gave birth to his father, A Lois
Speaker 1: in eighteen thirty six. Some legends say a wealthy Jewish
Speaker 1: man or a nobleman impregnated her. We don't know. The
Speaker 1: Church she was baptized in and the entire town where
Speaker 1: she was born, Dollarsheim, was obliterated by German artillery, probably
Speaker 1: on Hitler's orders in order to conceal his background, which
Speaker 1: is serious warlord. Move right there, Yeah, I'll give it
Speaker 1: to you.
Speaker 2: Erase the skel rovers, yeah yeah, get rid of that shit, Grandma.
Speaker 1: One of those things. One of those few places you'll catch,
Speaker 1: like a lot of really serious historians speculating, is like,
Speaker 1: would it have even been possible for a guy with
Speaker 1: the last name Schickel Gruber to have done the things
Speaker 1: that Hitler did, because it was kind of like chance
Speaker 1: that he wound up with the last name Hitler, like
Speaker 1: his dad adopted it from another guy who probably wasn't
Speaker 1: his dad. It's a messy case. Heidler was the original name,
Speaker 1: and then they changed it to Hitler. I say, okay,
Speaker 1: and I have trouble imagining Hyle Schickel Grueber.
Speaker 2: No, because people will keep stumbling over it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Chicl Gruber. It'd be like if Google had if
Speaker 1: their name had been like question, ask, yeah, exactly, it
Speaker 1: just probably wouldn't have worked as well.
Speaker 2: No, No, no, it definitely would not.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So historians debate over the exact nature of the
Speaker 1: genealogy further back than Hitler's dad, but the dad was
Speaker 1: a bastard that at least maybe we don't even know
Speaker 1: that much. All of this is still debated. The odds
Speaker 1: that Hitler was ashamed of a secret Jewish person in
Speaker 1: his past, though, are lower than the odds that he
Speaker 1: was just worried people would find out his dad was gross.
Speaker 1: Alois Hitler was a mid level customs official in brown Ow, Austria.
Speaker 1: He'd been respected in the local community, but his middle
Speaker 1: management image belied the reality of a man who repeatedly
Speaker 1: married children. Alois's cool swere it is?
Speaker 2: So it's wondering when pedophiles are going to be a
Speaker 2: part of the story.
Speaker 1: They will be a part of this story all the
Speaker 1: way through. Well, great, nazi'sn't gross sexuals wo wow. Yeah,
Speaker 1: everybody focuses on the possibility that there was pooh sex.
Speaker 1: The stuff that we know is so much grosser than pooping,
Speaker 1: Like that's whatever. People who are perfectly fine can enjoy
Speaker 1: that sort of thing. What we're talking about with Hitler
Speaker 1: and his dad, both cases fucked up objectively.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can, you can have consensual pooh sex whatever,
Speaker 2: it's whatever.
Speaker 1: Just clean your own sheets, clean your own sheets, or
Speaker 1: pay your cleaning lady incredibly. Well, yes, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: sure there's some people who take that job. So Alois's
Speaker 1: first wife was much much older than him, and she
Speaker 1: died after a few years of marriage. Some of the
Speaker 1: rumors or that he married her for her money, which whatever.
Speaker 1: While Alois was married, but while his first wife was sick,
Speaker 1: he moved a sixteen year old girl into their home
Speaker 1: to be his serving maid. This girl, Clara, was his niece.
Speaker 1: Now cool cool a loser now. John Toland, who's one
Speaker 1: of the preminent Hitler biographers of all times, says that
Speaker 1: Clara was hot, quote with abundant dark hair. He claims
Speaker 1: that she was quote installed with the Hitler's at an
Speaker 1: end where Aloys was already carrying on an affair with
Speaker 1: the kitchen maid Francisca. So, when Alois's first wife is alive,
Speaker 1: he's got this sixteen year old niece who he's hitting on,
Speaker 1: and also this like seventeen year old kitchen maid named Francisca,
Speaker 1: both of whom he's like starting up a thing with
Speaker 1: while his first wife is alive and dying, so when
Speaker 1: his first wife died, Alois got her money and married Francisca.
Speaker 1: I'm going to quote now from the fantastic book explaining Hitler.
Speaker 1: After his first wife died, developments in the Alois Hitler
Speaker 1: household began to take on the appearance of a maimed
Speaker 1: French farce. After a period of living conjugally but without
Speaker 1: the benefit of clergy and with the kitchen maid, while
Speaker 1: simultaneously enjoying the services of the even younger maid and niece, Clara,
Speaker 1: he married the older one.
Speaker 2: Well, good for.
Speaker 1: Him, Good for him picking that seventeen year old, not
Speaker 1: the sixteen year old. I guess how old is he
Speaker 1: at this point? He is in his forties now. According
Speaker 1: to John Toland, Francisca was quote only too aware of
Speaker 1: how tempting a pretty maid could be to the success
Speaker 1: to the susceptible Alois. After the wedding, the first thing
Speaker 1: she did was get rid of Clara. Luckily, for Alois,
Speaker 1: his second wife soon died, allowing him to finally realize
Speaker 1: his true dream of marrying his teenage niece.
Speaker 2: Wow, do you know how how did Francesca?
Speaker 1: It was cancer? It was a lot of cancer. In
Speaker 1: the Hitler family tree. He was kind of scared about
Speaker 1: his whole enough not enough, not enough cancer among the Hitlers.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: Some juvenile leukemia would have really dealt with some problems
Speaker 1: for the world would be pretty great. Not often I
Speaker 1: stand for juvenile leukemia, but for Hitler.
Speaker 2: Get up in them bones.
Speaker 1: Get up in them bones. Oh so uh. The only
Speaker 1: thing getting in the way of Alois Hitler and his
Speaker 1: true love with his teenage niece was the fact that
Speaker 1: they were very close relatives. They officially share the same
Speaker 1: grand uncle, Johann George Heidler. Now, even in the late
Speaker 1: eighteen hundreds, marrying your teenage niece was sort of frowned upon.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I did see that.
Speaker 1: This is not one of those things where, no, it
Speaker 1: was normal at the time, everybody's marrying their sixteen year
Speaker 1: old serving girl niece. No, alloys had to get special
Speaker 1: dispensation from the pope to marry and continue fucking his niece.
Speaker 1: He wanted to fuck his niece so bad he got
Speaker 1: pappal approval. Oh my god, that's that's Hitler's dad.
Speaker 2: Just dear Pope, dear.
Speaker 1: Pope, I got my niece. You gotta see this girl.
Speaker 2: Yeah, let me send you a couple of pictures.
Speaker 1: I drew some creatures.
Speaker 2: Yeah, just because you chose to be a celibate, it
Speaker 2: doesn't mean I need to be a celibate. And I'd
Speaker 2: like to break that with a child with.
Speaker 1: A child related to, related to and kind of morally
Speaker 1: responsible to.
Speaker 2: Can I give a thumb Can I get a thumbs up?
Speaker 1: Thumbs up? Thumbs down? What's Catholicism say? And the pope
Speaker 1: just said go for it, go for it. Yeahler's dad
Speaker 1: had every official papal permission to fuck his niece.
Speaker 2: All popes are great? Anything wrong?
Speaker 1: What a great thing to exist a pope? Cool?
Speaker 2: Hitler's Catholic?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I mean Hitler didn't really give a shit. Well,
Speaker 1: I mean he was a Hitlerist.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I like technically I guess on on the
Speaker 2: on paper.
Speaker 1: Yeah. And at that point in Austria, you're not gonna
Speaker 1: not you got to be straight with the Catholic Church. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's Austria. It's Austrian in the late eighteen hundreds.
Speaker 2: How did this guy not get like the sin guilt
Speaker 2: ship worked into him?
Speaker 1: I mean he might have. I assumed there were a lot.
Speaker 1: I assume there was talk. I assume people were like,
Speaker 1: it's kind of fucked up, right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I feel so bad about sucking my niece child.
Speaker 1: Well, I don't know if he did, but I'm gonna
Speaker 1: I'm gonna guess people in town there were some like
Speaker 1: but you know, those people all died of typhus, you know,
Speaker 1: so we don't know what they were talking about. Not enough,
Speaker 1: just give you all the Austrians, okay, So to make
Speaker 1: things even creepier. According to Ron Rosenbaum's explaining Hitler quote,
Speaker 1: even after the Vatican granted the dispensation, Clara continued to
Speaker 1: call her new husband what she called him when she
Speaker 1: was still his maid mistress uncle. So Hitler's mom called
Speaker 1: his dad uncle the whole time Hitler was a kid.
Speaker 2: That's worse than when parents call each other mother and father.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's grosser. Then that's like Mike Pince shit on
Speaker 1: another one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, my uncle.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's gross. It's really gross, it's really nasty. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this is the relationship Adolf Hitler was born into. So
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say in fairness to Hitler, because you
Speaker 1: don't give Hitler credit for anything because he's Hitler. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but as a baby, that's a rough situation to land in.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, Also, this is some classic uncle bullshit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you always got a.
Speaker 2: Good uncle on a bad on. It's always liked when
Speaker 2: you got a bad uncle. It's nothing worse than a
Speaker 2: bad uncle.
Speaker 1: Hitler's dad was like the platonic ideal of a bad uncle, like.
Speaker 2: The uncle that everyone's like, can he not come here?
Speaker 1: And he can maynot have him around?
Speaker 2: Please, it's just cut that uncle out of everything.
Speaker 1: Okay. So, uh, Hitler's dad marries two women that Uh
Speaker 1: Hitler biographer Ian Kershaw describes as young enough to be
Speaker 1: his children. As a dad, he's remembered generally as a
Speaker 1: strict authoritarian figure, but most people who knew the family
Speaker 1: when his dad was alive say that Alois wasn't, you know,
Speaker 1: particularly violent or bad by the standards of the time
Speaker 1: towards his kid or his wife. We would probably almost
Speaker 1: certainly call the discipline that Hitler endured child abuse today,
Speaker 1: but it was not out of the norm for the area,
Speaker 1: and most of the boys in Austria who grew up
Speaker 1: around Hitler didn't grow up to be Hitler. So you
Speaker 1: don't want to put too much influence on the fact
Speaker 1: that his dad was an authoritarian. But a lot of
Speaker 1: the boys around Hitler did grow up to be Nazis,
Speaker 1: so let's not discount the impact of authoritarian parenting either.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, but it's probably not what we're looking for
Speaker 1: for looking for the whole reason Hitler went all crazy,
Speaker 1: the fact that his dad hit him sometimes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, it's like, that's not going to be that
Speaker 2: doesn't that's a real age.
Speaker 1: Z Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. You're you're leaving out some
Speaker 1: stuff if you if you drop it down to that
Speaker 1: uncle father, my uncle father, uncle, my uncle daddy, Jesus
Speaker 1: oh Hitler.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna dig into Hitler as a young man
Speaker 1: in his early love affairs. Great and spoilers. They're as
Speaker 1: creepy as everything else in this podcast is gonna be.
Speaker 1: I'm not surprised if you thought Hitler the dad was bad.
Speaker 2: No, Yeah, there's no way like Hitler Adolph is like
Speaker 2: a lothario coming from this place at all.
Speaker 1: No, what's surprising is how much like Elliott Roger he is.
Speaker 2: Oh, I'm not surprised by that. Fucking losersss God.
Speaker 1: And of course that is the overwhelming thing that you
Speaker 1: say to yourself when you get into some real deep
Speaker 1: study of the Nazis is these fucking losers.
Speaker 2: All you can say fucking losers.
Speaker 1: You know who's not losers though, Brandy? Who the wonderful
Speaker 1: sponsors who support this show and or program with their
Speaker 1: products and or services and or add petro dollar, add money.
Speaker 1: I'm spinning out of control here. Products We're back, boy.
Speaker 2: Love those products.
Speaker 1: Hate Hitler exactly, And there's nothing that's a squeegey for
Speaker 1: your brain as well as a solid product or just
Speaker 1: a nice service, especially on like a hot Hitler ful day.
Speaker 2: Just like being told the possibilities.
Speaker 1: The possibilities, you know what. Nazis didn't like possibilities, of
Speaker 1: course not, but that's what you get with products and
Speaker 1: services as possibilities. Yes, a lot of good economic discourse
Speaker 1: coming out of this episode. We should write a book.
Speaker 2: Let's write another Hitler book.
Speaker 1: There enough there, there should be a couple more Hitler books. Okay,
Speaker 1: so most of our what.
Speaker 2: Hitler think about square space?
Speaker 1: Why would Hitler think about square space?
Speaker 2: I don't like the free speech of the internet.
Speaker 1: You know, I hate to say this because it's what
Speaker 1: I do to make my living. But Hitler would a
Speaker 1: thousand percent be a podcaster if he were around the day.
Speaker 2: Absolutely.
Speaker 1: I mean, he like wrote at length about how the
Speaker 1: best way, the only real way to convince anyone of
Speaker 1: anything was with the human voice. Yeah, and like the
Speaker 1: power of like radio to isolate someone with a voice
Speaker 1: and to really influence their thought, which is one of
Speaker 1: the things that scares me about the podcast era. But
Speaker 1: we're getting.
Speaker 2: A whole supper converse. Yeah, he would be like an
Speaker 2: Alex Jones type, but like with his own show.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but like, yeah, he would be a lot more
Speaker 1: popular than Alex ja. Yeah he would because I don't
Speaker 1: think Alex has a problem saying the quiet part's loud,
Speaker 1: and Hitler was, up until the point where he took power,
Speaker 1: usually pretty good about quietly saying the loud parts. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's why he won.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So most of our evidence for young Hitler's early
Speaker 1: love affairs comes from a dude named August Kubazek. Now.
Speaker 1: Kubazek is a heavily debated figure amongst Hitler scholars. He
Speaker 1: wrote a book about his childhood with Hitler after the war.
Speaker 1: It apparently started during the Third Reich as a pro
Speaker 1: Hitler like Nazi biography, and then after the war, he
Speaker 1: was like, well, I mean, I've already got this stuff down.
Speaker 1: People are gonna want to know what Hitler was like
Speaker 1: as a kid, so I'm gonna write this book. Some
Speaker 1: of what he says is definitely either a lie or
Speaker 1: stretching the truth. There's a lot of debate over how
Speaker 1: much to trust him, but it's also incontrovertible that he
Speaker 1: grew up with Hitler, that he was Hitler's really only
Speaker 1: friend as a kid, and that they lived together. They
Speaker 1: were essentially like freshman college roommates in the big city.
Speaker 1: Like so he no one else has this perspective. So
Speaker 1: kubaz X's book is an irreplaceable source for the early
Speaker 1: years of Hitler's life. You can't under like you have
Speaker 1: to be critically read him. You have to read him.
Speaker 1: I've read kubaz X's book, of course, and it's really interesting.
Speaker 1: If you do take it well, I would recommend reading
Speaker 1: like a John Toland or an Ian Kershaw biography first
Speaker 1: and then go into kubaz X so you've got some
Speaker 1: sort of context for it. I'm going to be quoting
Speaker 1: from all three of these sources in the next little
Speaker 1: bit here, because it provides a good synthesis, and I
Speaker 1: trust those guys to separate probable truth from probable live
Speaker 1: better than I trust myself, because they're elderly Hitler scholars
Speaker 1: and I'm just a Hitler nerd Anyway, Kubazek recalls exactly
Speaker 1: one romantic focus for Hitler in his young years, a
Speaker 1: girl named Stephanie who lived in Lynz. That was the
Speaker 1: small town that he grew up in. Now. Hitler was
Speaker 1: madly in love with Stephanie, and we have no evidence
Speaker 1: that she ever knew anything about him. In fact, later
Speaker 1: in life after the war, when she was told that
Speaker 1: Adolf Hitler had been in love with her, she was
Speaker 1: shocked and horrified, which is it's a dick move to
Speaker 1: tell any what that Yeah, oh man, what.
Speaker 2: A bummer, because you're just like, am I responsible for you? Like?
Speaker 1: You get through this horrible war. She was an austri
Speaker 1: She saw some shit. It would have been a nightmare
Speaker 1: for anyone living in that region. You get through this
Speaker 1: horrible war, and then like years later, someone's like, by
Speaker 1: the way, Hitler wanted to fuck you?
Speaker 2: What would you ever tell anybody that process that baby
Speaker 2: Hitler popping boners to you? Don't tell her that yeah,
Speaker 2: because then that just makes you just rethink everything.
Speaker 1: About is this my fault? No, Stephanie, you didn't definitely not.
Speaker 1: You didn't do anything wrong. I mean, you've been dead
Speaker 1: for decades, but you seem fine.
Speaker 2: You're listening somewhere.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we get a medium.
Speaker 2: You should be doing this podcast with a medium to
Speaker 2: contact some of these people and be like, hey, it's okay.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's gonna be fine. Yeah. That's actually similar
Speaker 1: to another podcast idea I have, which is using a
Speaker 1: medium to sexually harass dead bastards. I really just want
Speaker 1: to like see how uncomfortable I can make chairman now.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, like really really get in there and
Speaker 1: like Locke his ghost in a room. Yes, yeah, see
Speaker 1: where it goes.
Speaker 2: I am on board for that.
Speaker 1: I think we all are. So if you want to,
Speaker 1: So Hitler was in love with this girl who knew
Speaker 1: nothing about him. He became convinced. And this is while
Speaker 1: they're in like elementary school essentially like early high school era,
Speaker 1: that kind of thing. Like he's a teenager, young teenager.
Speaker 1: So during this, oh yeah, I was.
Speaker 2: In marching band. I had one of these kids know
Speaker 2: exactly who this is.
Speaker 1: I don't know if there's a woman I've met who
Speaker 1: didn't have one of these kids in they're life. That's
Speaker 1: one of the ski Yeah. Anyway, so Hitler became convinced
Speaker 1: that Stephanie was sending him secret signals and messages only
Speaker 1: he could see, and he would yeah, yeah, they were
Speaker 1: destined to be together. He would rant about all this
Speaker 1: to Kubazek, and Kubazek claims he was pretty like questioning
Speaker 1: of all this stuff to Hitler, but like only to
Speaker 1: an extent. Kubazeck did try to convince Hitler that if
Speaker 1: he needed to at least talk to this girl, if
Speaker 1: there's gonna be any hope of her liking him, at
Speaker 1: the very least, he suggested that Hitler should learn to dance,
Speaker 1: because he knew that Stephanie liked dancing, which is like
Speaker 1: solid advice, like, okay, get interested in something this girl's
Speaker 1: interested in, have a similar interest. Pretty solid advice today.
Speaker 1: So here's Kubazek quote, all this is no good, adolph
Speaker 1: I replied, Stephanie is fond of dancing. If you want
Speaker 1: to conquer her, you will have to dance around just
Speaker 1: as aimlessly and idiotically as the others. That was all
Speaker 1: that was needed to set him off raving. No, no, never,
Speaker 1: he screamed at me, I shall never dance. Do you
Speaker 1: understand Stephanie only dances because she is forced to by society,
Speaker 1: on which she unfortunately depends. Once she is my wife,
Speaker 1: she won't have the slightest desire to dance. That is
Speaker 1: and Kopa's X books a generally pretty pro Hitler book,
Speaker 1: Like not pro the stuff Hitler did is like he's
Speaker 1: obviously against the third Reich, but like he presents a
Speaker 1: sympathetic view of Hitler. And this is how he describes it. Wow,
Speaker 1: what a I mean, what a little maniac?
Speaker 2: Isn't the sores for the word loser? It's truly insane, Like, no,
Speaker 2: I'll never dance, She'll stop dancing.
Speaker 1: She'll stop dancing too.
Speaker 2: She'sn't even dancing because she wants to society.
Speaker 1: It sounds like a Reddit post.
Speaker 2: Totally.
Speaker 1: It sounds like a Reddit post. He'd be top, he
Speaker 1: would be he would be so addicted to slash Pole,
Speaker 1: like he would never get off of that fucking ship.
Speaker 1: He'd be an eight chan like he'd be deep into
Speaker 1: this ship. Dance Never, I shall never dance, Adolf Hitler,
Speaker 1: there's your fucking t.
Speaker 2: Shirt, guilty feet, ain't got no rhythm?
Speaker 1: Oh shit, yes nice? Oh boy? What are the good songs?
Speaker 1: They always they always get it right, So exactly obvious.
Speaker 2: Actually about Hitler.
Speaker 1: It is about all music is about Hitler, one way
Speaker 1: or the other. YEP, that's my theory. We'll talk about
Speaker 1: Toto's Africa. It's it's a it's a stretch. But I'll
Speaker 1: get you there now, I get I got a diagram,
Speaker 1: I got a diagram. It's about the desert fox. And now, obviously,
Speaker 1: waiting around and being an insane person did not woo Stephanie. Gradually,
Speaker 1: Hitler started to realize that she wasn't going to fall
Speaker 1: to him. According to Koubazak, Hitler reacted like you'd expect
Speaker 1: a modern day insult to react with threats of violence.
Speaker 1: Of course, quote Stephanie was at that time in an
Speaker 1: unfriendly mood. She would pass the basically nearby road with
Speaker 1: her face averted, as though Hitler did not exist at all.
Speaker 1: This bought brought him to the verge of despair. I
Speaker 1: can't stand it any longer, he exclaimed. I will make
Speaker 1: an end of it. It was the first and as
Speaker 1: far as I know, the last time that Adolf contemplated
Speaker 1: suite A side seriously. It was not. He would jump
Speaker 1: into the river from the Danube Bridge, he told me,
Speaker 1: and then it would be over and done with. But
Speaker 1: Stephanie would have to die with him. He insisted on that.
Speaker 1: Once more, a plan was thought up in all its details.
Speaker 1: Every single phase of the horrifying tragedy was minutely described,
Speaker 1: including the part I would have to play. Even my
Speaker 1: conduct of this as the sole survivor was ordained. The
Speaker 1: somber scene was with me even in my dreams.
Speaker 2: Young Hitler, oh God, just the most emo little shit want.
Speaker 1: To kill himself and a girl he doesn't know him. God,
Speaker 1: had he even talked to her at this point, well,
Speaker 1: as far as we know they he never said a
Speaker 1: word to her.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. I just you can't hate him more.
Speaker 2: But you find new depths.
Speaker 1: You find new depths of Yeah, like, yeah, Hitler, oh.
Speaker 2: Here's a new cavity of hate haven't filled for you.
Speaker 1: I didn't expect this fucking loser so out you know.
Speaker 2: That he's a loser. And then it's just like from
Speaker 2: this age too, you're like, oh God, just go to
Speaker 2: a toastmaster's class or something, you piece of shit.
Speaker 1: This is part of why I get all frustrated when
Speaker 1: people are like, he was a sexual serial killer and
Speaker 1: that's why. No, dude, he was just a lame ass dude.
Speaker 2: He's for sure like an Yeah, yeah, yeah, I am old.
Speaker 1: I am old this woman and she doesn't deserve to
Speaker 1: live if she doesn't like me, even though I've never
Speaker 1: even talked to her.
Speaker 2: Like, there were his parents together, his entires.
Speaker 1: His dad died when he was, you know, in his teens,
Speaker 1: and his mom died not all that, I mean, his
Speaker 1: dad died when he was pretty young, and his mom
Speaker 1: died also when he was pretty young, like again an adult,
Speaker 1: So his I don't think he had His dad was
Speaker 1: pretty authoritarian, but once his dad kicked off, it was
Speaker 1: kind of just his mom, and she was sort of
Speaker 1: he was a mama's boy. She was sort of a
Speaker 1: doting mom. So was that Clara, Yeah, Clara Hitler, Clara Hitler, Yeah,
Speaker 1: yeah Hitler. Adolf Hitler's mom was Clara.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, I see gotcha. Yeah, So it's he's born
Speaker 2: in incest and then yeah, his dad dies and then
Speaker 2: he's raised way okay, gotcha.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, So outside of his obsession with Stephanie kubaz
Speaker 1: X says he doesn't know if any individual women in
Speaker 1: Hitler's life in this period, certainly no one he might
Speaker 1: have fucked. When they became young adults and moved to
Speaker 1: Vienna together, Hitler remained unlate. Here's John Toland's coverage of
Speaker 1: Kubuzek's recollection quote. On promenades, girls and women would often
Speaker 1: slightly glance at them. At first, Kubazek thought their interest
Speaker 1: was directed to him, but it soon became apparent that
Speaker 1: the reserved Adolph was the object. He coldly ignored their
Speaker 1: silent invitations if the two did nothing about sex. They
Speaker 1: spent hours at night discussing women, love and marriage, with Adolph,
Speaker 1: as usual, dominating the conversation. Over and over. He insisted
Speaker 1: that he must keep the flame of life pure. That is,
Speaker 1: he believed, in accordance with his Catholic upbringing, a man
Speaker 1: and a woman should keep themselves chaste in body and
Speaker 1: soul until Mary's and just thus be worthy of producing
Speaker 1: healthy children for the nation. But the dark side of
Speaker 1: sex also haunted him, and he talked by the hour
Speaker 1: about depraved sexual customs. He railed against prostitution, condemning not
Speaker 1: only the whoors and their customers, but society. His condemnation
Speaker 1: approached obsession, and one night, after attending a performance of
Speaker 1: Weddikin's Spring Awakening, he took Gustell's arm and said, we
Speaker 1: must see the sink of iniquity. Once they turned down
Speaker 1: a small, dark alley it was the Spittelberg Gusa, and
Speaker 1: walked past a row of small hostels so brightly lit
Speaker 1: that they could see the girls inside in their scanty
Speaker 1: and slovenly attire. They sat there, recalled Kubazek, making up
Speaker 1: their faces and combing their hair and looking at themselves
Speaker 1: in the mirror, without, however, for one moment, losing sight
Speaker 1: of the men strolling by. Occasionally a man would stop
Speaker 1: in front of a house converse with a girl, and
Speaker 1: the light would go out. When the two youths reached
Speaker 1: the end of the alley, Adolf maneuvered them in an
Speaker 1: about face, and they took another long look at the
Speaker 1: appalling site. Back in their room, Adolf went into a
Speaker 1: lengthy tirade on the evils of prostitution, with quote a
Speaker 1: cold objectivity, as though it were a question of his
Speaker 1: attitude towards the fight against tuberculosis or towards cremation. Wow,
Speaker 1: so this is young Hitler, celibate, wo angry about other
Speaker 1: people not being celibate, and a real thought audit level
Speaker 1: hatred of sex workers.
Speaker 2: He is gallons of come and his sleep hm at
Speaker 2: this point in his life. I mean, every fucking night,
Speaker 2: what a what a.
Speaker 1: Shitty little his socks shatter when they're tried.
Speaker 2: Seriously, I cannot imagine, like how many fucking wet dreams a.
Speaker 1: Dude happened, and they're all about the stuff that he
Speaker 1: says is terrible. Yeah, because that's why you rant about
Speaker 1: this for hours to your best friend. You're concealing an
Speaker 1: erection as he yells about prostitution out there trying.
Speaker 2: To make a living of any kind in this world.
Speaker 1: Again, we all knew a Hitler. Oh yeah, we've all
Speaker 1: known this kid.
Speaker 2: Oh god, no, absolutely, oh god, yeah, he is the
Speaker 2: one that he's like, that's like one of the names
Speaker 2: that you text the other people you went to high
Speaker 2: school with that you just laugh about when you hear
Speaker 2: their name. Ye remember that guy?
Speaker 1: Oh fuck yeah, oh that guy. Yeah yeah. So Hitler's
Speaker 1: mom died like right before this point of like a
Speaker 1: really really horrifying cancer. Uh, and then you know, he
Speaker 1: wound up in with Kubazek, which is where that happened.
Speaker 1: They lived together for a while, but Kubazek was successful,
Speaker 1: like he was a really good musician, and Hitler, you know,
Speaker 1: didn't get into art school. That's a pretty famous story.
Speaker 1: He eventually ran out of money and wound up living
Speaker 1: in a men's home, which was essentially like a homeless
Speaker 1: shelter for vagrants. According to Ian Kershaw, being homeless did
Speaker 1: not improve Hitler's game.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I can't imagine that it would.
Speaker 1: Quote should be fair.
Speaker 2: A home wouldn't have improved his game.
Speaker 1: It seems like he was kind of hopeless either way.
Speaker 2: I don't would help. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Quote. When his circle of acquaintances got round to discussing
Speaker 1: women and doubtless their own former girlfriends and sexual experiences,
Speaker 1: the best Hitler could come up with was a veiled
Speaker 1: reference to Stephanie, who had been his first love, though
Speaker 1: she never knew it because he never told her. The
Speaker 1: impression left with Reinhold Hainisch was that Hitler had very
Speaker 1: little respect for the female sex but very austere ideas
Speaker 1: about relations between men and women. Hainish recalled Hitler telling
Speaker 1: him of a brief encounter with a milkmaid while he
Speaker 1: was still at school, ending abruptly when she made advances
Speaker 1: and he ran away, knocking over a churn of milk
Speaker 1: in his haste. This was probably a lie by Hitler.
Speaker 1: Hitler described his own eye deal woman is cuddle. Is
Speaker 1: a cute, cuddly, naive little thing, tender, sweet and stupid. Cool.
Speaker 2: Cool, that's great. You want a baby? Peace? Well, I mean, yeah,
Speaker 2: it runs in his blood.
Speaker 1: Does run in his blood?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Oh god, it's gonna be weird how much it runs
Speaker 1: in his blood. But first we're back, okay, so uh.
Speaker 1: Hitler also claimed during this period that women would inherently
Speaker 1: quote rather bow to a strong man than dominate a weakling.
Speaker 1: Even for the time, young Hitler was seen as a
Speaker 1: bit of a prude. This meant he didn't fit in
Speaker 1: super well in Turn of the century Enna, where erotic
Speaker 1: art was in vogue and people were starting to do
Speaker 1: the nineteen oh nine version of opening up a little bit.
Speaker 2: What's because he's just like popping boners all over them,
Speaker 2: just popping Everyone could see him.
Speaker 1: His leader hosenes just like an arrow.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just like constantly, just like very sweaty and pink,
Speaker 2: with like a.
Speaker 1: Giant, angry direct terrible artists screaming at everybody and talking
Speaker 1: about how it's bad to come instantly Hitler, Oh, god nerd.
Speaker 1: So one of the things that was happening in Vienna
Speaker 1: this time, in the turn of the century is that
Speaker 1: rules about women's modesty had started to change and women
Speaker 1: were allowed to I mean, we're not talking like woke
Speaker 1: by our standards, but things are improving, you know, things
Speaker 1: are improving, and some women are pushing the envelope, both
Speaker 1: professionally and then just how they present themselves to the world.
Speaker 1: Young Hitler did not like that, of course. Here's an
Speaker 1: excerpt from Kershaw's book again quote where decency demanded that
Speaker 1: women were scarcely allowed to even show an ankle. Hitler's
Speaker 1: embarrassment and the rapidity with which he fled with his
Speaker 1: friend when a prospective landlady, during a search for a
Speaker 1: room for Kubazek, let her silk dressing gown fall open
Speaker 1: to reveal that she was wearing nothing but a pair
Speaker 1: of knickers. But his brittishness went far beyond this. It amounted,
Speaker 1: according to kubaz x account, to a deep disgust and
Speaker 1: repugnance at sexual activity. Hitler avoided contact with women, meeting
Speaker 1: with cold indifference during visits to the opera alleged attempts
Speaker 1: by young women, probably seeing him as something of an oddity,
Speaker 1: to flirt with or tease him. He was repelled by homosexuality.
Speaker 1: He refrained from masturbation. Prostitution horrified but fascinated him. He
Speaker 1: associated it with venereal disease, which petrified him. So it
Speaker 1: is again hard to say how much of Kuba's x
Speaker 1: account is true. If Hitler was originally super anti gay,
Speaker 1: for example, he definitely got over that shit by the
Speaker 1: time he was out of the army. Ernst Rome, the
Speaker 1: head of the Brown Shirts, was a flamboyantly gay man
Speaker 1: who was flagrant about his love life. Hitler did eventually
Speaker 1: kill Rome, but only after he was in power, and
Speaker 1: some accounts say he resisted doing so for a very
Speaker 1: long time and expressed angst over the decision. Basically, Rome
Speaker 1: wanted to replace the German Army with the Brown Shirts,
Speaker 1: and that's why Hitler had to get rid of him,
Speaker 1: and there was definitely like he was willing to kill
Speaker 1: him because he was gay and he was seen as
Speaker 1: like a liability, but Hitler wasn't inherently against the idea
Speaker 1: of working with like It seems like he moderated on
Speaker 1: that as during his time in the army, at least
Speaker 1: from like a one point of view or another. There's
Speaker 1: debate about how much. But one thing that didn't change
Speaker 1: from Kubas X's memory of him was Hitler's obsession with
Speaker 1: venereal disease. The subject came up frequently in mind camp
Speaker 1: and in Hitler's early speeches. He generally like would compare
Speaker 1: the Jewish refugees immigrating to the country as like a
Speaker 1: form of venereal disease. And there was a lot of
Speaker 1: anti Semitic claims that Jewish prostitutes were spreading typhus. And
Speaker 1: there's actually a rumor that Hitler himself got syphilis from
Speaker 1: a prostitute sometime and like when he was a young adult.
Speaker 1: Some in Wisenthal, the fame Nazi Hunter, went to his
Speaker 1: grave believing this, even though there's no good evidence about it.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of weird questions as to why people
Speaker 1: is someone like Wisenthal who's a Holocaust however himself would
Speaker 1: be so much like into wanting to believe this, Yeah
Speaker 1: a reason. It's also there's like some weird A lot
Speaker 1: of the attempts to explain Hitler kind of come across
Speaker 1: as blaming a Jewish person for his hatred of Jewish people,
Speaker 1: which is really problematic.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's an issue.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. Kubuzek, for his part, always claimed that Hitler was,
Speaker 1: to the best of his knowledge, a normal dude, sexually
Speaker 1: not homosexual, not into anything weird, just like kind of
Speaker 1: a sexually frustrated young man. Kubuzek was so emphatic about
Speaker 1: that because by the nineteen fifties, when he was working
Speaker 1: on his book, there were numerous rumors that Hitler had
Speaker 1: been gay. This conspiracy theory is best embodied by the
Speaker 1: book The Pink Swastika from nineteen ninety five. That book
Speaker 1: was a major source for Denish Desso's a documentary where
Speaker 1: Denish claims that Democrats are the modern Nazis and that
Speaker 1: gay people are Nazis and Hitler was gay, as a
Speaker 1: regular headline in far right publications. I found one on
Speaker 1: Breitbart from twenty sixteen that just said, new evidence from
Speaker 1: his doctors shows Hitler was gay. Obviously, it's not new evidence,
Speaker 1: it's it's the old OSS reports that suggested Hitler was homosexual.
Speaker 1: Of course, in the OSS document, doctor Langer wrote, quote,
Speaker 1: his sex life is as dual as plitical outlook. He
Speaker 1: is both a homosexual and heterosexual, both socialist and fervent nationalists,
Speaker 1: both man and woman. Again, that's just like psychoanalytic bullshit.
Speaker 1: There's there's no evidence that he was homosexual. He was
Speaker 1: okay with working with gay men, yeah, but like there's
Speaker 1: no evidence beyond that. It's like, yeah, one of the
Speaker 1: things that's interesting to me is when you read a
Speaker 1: lot of like the old nineteen thirties and late twenties
Speaker 1: news articles criticizing Hitler. A lot of these like nineteen
Speaker 1: twenties German journalists, some of whom are conservative, when they're
Speaker 1: talking about like homosexuality with the Nazi Party go out
Speaker 1: of their way to not condemn homosexuality, to just be
Speaker 1: like that, we're condemning the Nazis because their attitudes on
Speaker 1: homosexuality are so negative, but they have all these gay members. Yeah,
Speaker 1: which is more nuanced than I expected out of like
Speaker 1: nineteen twenties journalists in Germany.
Speaker 2: Very interesting. Well, yeah, it does make a lot of
Speaker 2: sense though, because it's like I mean, coming after World
Speaker 2: War One, you're in the trenches with men, and you
Speaker 2: need some kind of comfort.
Speaker 1: To probably a lot of dudes fucking in World War One. Share.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, just to feel like you're a person and
Speaker 2: not just part of a meat grinder. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 2: so it's like, I'm sure that definitely.
Speaker 1: You know, it was part of why attitudes started to
Speaker 1: open up, right until the Nazis clammed them shut again.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: Now, Just so we covered the basics of Hitler's life here,
Speaker 1: Hitler served in World War One. Obviously, he was at
Speaker 1: the front basically the entire war. There are rumors, as
Speaker 1: we covered in our Children of Dictators episode, that he
Speaker 1: fathered a son with a French woman during this time.
Speaker 1: This is very much doubted by historians, the kind of
Speaker 1: thing you can't debunk. But for what it's worth, the
Speaker 1: son of the guy who thought he was Hitler's son
Speaker 1: says that Hitler was a gentle lover to his grandma.
Speaker 1: I don't know what that's based on. Seems like a reach.
Speaker 1: It seems like a weird flex too.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, a gentle love. Here's the thing. I
Speaker 2: don't even know. I feel like he would be just
Speaker 2: like a petrified guy that would like come really quickly.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna guess that is more accurate.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that feels way like yeah, he's probably all fucking
Speaker 2: talk and then he's just like, oh okay, sorry, yeah,
Speaker 2: oh no, he says I'm sorry when he comes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the Hitler.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Now, when Hitler got back from World War One, he
Speaker 1: was sent by his military superiors to infiltrate a meeting
Speaker 1: of the National Socialist Political Party. And yet, you know
Speaker 1: the rest, more or less, he started giving speeches there,
Speaker 1: became a figure in the National Socialist Party, consolidated power,
Speaker 1: and plotted his you know, not quite meteoric, but eventually
Speaker 1: total rise to power. Now, we don't have a whole
Speaker 1: lot on Hitler's sexuality during the early nineteen twenties or
Speaker 1: his relationships. Hanschtangele is one of the main sources for
Speaker 1: the claims that Hitler might have been gay, and he
Speaker 1: said stuff like this quote. Obvious prostitutes barely admitted to
Speaker 1: the Kaiserhoff hotel were fervently admired by him, provided that
Speaker 1: they appeared in couples or with a man. A solitary
Speaker 1: woman is usually ignored by him, unless he is in
Speaker 1: a large crowd and can send in someone to find
Speaker 1: out her identity. He always wishes to be a spectator,
Speaker 1: do you know, he once said to doctor Sedgwick in
Speaker 1: nineteen twenty three, the audience at the circus is just
Speaker 1: like a woman. Someone who does not understand that intrinsically
Speaker 1: feminine character of the mass will never be an effective speaker.
Speaker 1: Ask yourself, what does a woman expect from a man? Clearness,
Speaker 1: decision power, action Like a woman, the masses fluctuate between extremes.
Speaker 1: What we want is to get the masses to act.
Speaker 1: This can obviously not be done with an appeal to
Speaker 1: their selfishness, nor to their cowardice, but by an appeal
Speaker 1: to their idealism, their courage, and their spirit of sacrifice.
Speaker 1: Who has more the spirit of sacrifice than a woman?
Speaker 1: If she has talked too properly, she will be proud
Speaker 1: to sacrifice, because no woman will ever feel that her
Speaker 1: life sacrifices have received their duel fulfillment. It's Hitler analyzing
Speaker 1: the German people and interesting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, just what a first date?
Speaker 1: What a first date? Hans Stangele claims to have asked
Speaker 1: him once, why don't you marry, and he says. Hitler answered, quote,
Speaker 1: marriage is not for me and never will be. My
Speaker 1: only bride is my motherland. Then, seemingly with no sequence
Speaker 1: of ideas, he added, there are two ways in which
Speaker 1: a man's character may be judged by the woman he
Speaker 1: marries and by the way he dies. In nineteen twenty three,
Speaker 1: when Hanstangle once playfully six, if not a bride, you
Speaker 1: ought to have a mistress, Hitler replied, politics is a woman.
Speaker 1: He who loves her unhappily bites off his head. So
Speaker 1: this is one of the versions of Hitler. You get
Speaker 1: that he's just too busy being the embodiment of Germany
Speaker 1: to flirt with ladies.
Speaker 2: What a piece of I.
Speaker 1: Think he continues that line the rest of his life.
Speaker 1: I think in this stage it's not true. But he's
Speaker 1: not actually dating around that much, and in this stage
Speaker 1: he's still too awkward. He starts to have success with
Speaker 1: women when he gets popular, Yeah, when.
Speaker 2: He starts getting some power, because then it's not about him,
Speaker 2: it's about the mythic thing that he's created.
Speaker 1: And in that case, he keeps saying that out loud
Speaker 1: and hiding his relationships with women. But he's also fucking
Speaker 1: some people. So anyway, that's the way this goes. So
Speaker 1: it's hard, basically impossible to say when Hitler lost his virginity.
Speaker 1: We do have one spectacular example of Hitler striking out
Speaker 1: with a lady. It happened in nineteen twenty three, right
Speaker 1: before Hitler's famous beer hall push, when they were at
Speaker 1: Burkdis Garden. Now the story is related by Honchstangle, who
Speaker 1: had come to visit Hitler in Burkedus Garden on invitation,
Speaker 1: but like Hitler, didn't like own a house there or anything.
Speaker 1: At that point, they were all staying in a hotel.
Speaker 1: The manager of the hotel was a guy named her Buckner,
Speaker 1: who was a German flying ace in World War One
Speaker 1: and who had, according to Honstangle, a quote strikingly buxom,
Speaker 1: six foot tall blonde wife, which made her taller than Hitler.
Speaker 1: This rather vulgar, sensuous, blue eyed woman had manifestly succeeded
Speaker 1: in completely inflaming Hitler to a degree that made him
Speaker 1: seem entirely beyond himself. His breath was short, his cheeks feverish,
Speaker 1: his eyes filled with exaltation. In a swashbuckling manner, Hitler
Speaker 1: was strutting up and down the large veranda and garden,
Speaker 1: swinging his whip. He would stop now and again to
Speaker 1: talk to Frau Buckner, whip in hand, punctuating his sentences
Speaker 1: with the whip in a schoolboy fashion. He was obviously
Speaker 1: showing off talking at Frau Buckner in the numerous gallery
Speaker 1: of admiring females, all party adherents he made, However, no
Speaker 1: impression on Frau Buckner. On and on he went through
Speaker 1: the whole afternoon, acting the desperado, the wild man, the
Speaker 1: man of destiny. The whole performance seemed hopefully pubescent and empty.
Speaker 1: Oh god, Hitler just just whacking swinging a whip, trying
Speaker 1: to flirt with a girl.
Speaker 2: Check out my whip.
Speaker 1: Check the shit out? How good I am with his whip?
Speaker 1: Are you impressed?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: Think I look good?
Speaker 2: Oh that's like the nineteen twenties version of just like yeah,
Speaker 2: watching somebody play video games? Check it out?
Speaker 1: No, check out out good I am? So we get
Speaker 1: this headshot.
Speaker 2: Have so many potions. Think of how many potions I have.
Speaker 2: It's not real no now.
Speaker 1: Hitler also had a gigantic crush on his friend Putsy's wife,
Speaker 1: Helen A. Hompstangle. Ian Kershaw writes quote, on one occasion,
Speaker 1: he took advantage of Putsy Hompstangle's brief absence from the
Speaker 1: room to fall on his knees in front of Helen
Speaker 1: a Hompstangle, describing himself as her slave and bemoaning the
Speaker 1: faith that had led him to her too late. When
Speaker 1: Helen had told him of the incident, puts he put
Speaker 1: it down to Hitler's need to play the role of
Speaker 1: the languishing troubadour from time to time.
Speaker 2: This guy just like needed to be like that. He's
Speaker 2: a cuck, is what he actually is. That I think
Speaker 2: is what he would have preferred.
Speaker 1: He needed a good sex therapist, say no, dude, just
Speaker 1: do this.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah exactly, just like ask like, watch some
Speaker 2: of your friend's bone. That's why I think you that's.
Speaker 1: Why I think you'd be happiest with Hitler. Maybe give
Speaker 1: up politics and just watch your friend's bone. Yeah, be
Speaker 1: that guy, Be that guy that's so yeah compared to Hitler,
Speaker 1: that's a great guy to be.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, and especially like that is the child of
Speaker 2: a dad uncle. Yeah, I mean, like that's what your
Speaker 2: kid becomes.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So when Putsy later expressed the worry that Hitler
Speaker 1: was essentially trying to steal his wife's affections. Helena told
Speaker 1: Putsy not to worry. Hitler was quote an absolute neuter,
Speaker 1: so that was Helena's attitude towards him. Now, Hitler would
Speaker 1: later prove them in the oss wrong. Actually, in the
Speaker 1: early autumn of nineteen twenty six, when the rising fascist
Speaker 1: political star I met a girl named Mimi Writer. We
Speaker 1: will talk about her Hitler's courtship process and his preferences
Speaker 1: in fucking in part two of this podcast, But right now,
Speaker 1: it's the end of the episode till Thursday when we
Speaker 1: talk about the rest of this stuff. I see, Yeah, that.
Speaker 2: Was just that's just getting us to this, to me me.
Speaker 1: That's just getting us to me, me, giving us to
Speaker 1: me me. Maybe the first girl, it's really well, not
Speaker 1: the first girl he fucks, but like the first girl,
Speaker 1: we have a lot of detail on how he courted her.
Speaker 2: I see.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna be talking a lot about how Hitler
Speaker 1: flirted with girls.
Speaker 2: Was finally moving on from his fucking hand.
Speaker 1: His fucking hand, his leader hos.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. That he's such a he's such a.
Speaker 1: Loser, he's such a loser.
Speaker 2: I just wish ick beennign loser. There needs to be
Speaker 2: like what is the.
Speaker 1: People need to know? How lame we we always do,
Speaker 1: Like it's either like Hitler at the end of the war,
Speaker 1: where he's like a sick old man, or like Hitler
Speaker 1: is this terrifying warlord. Yeah, and we miss out on
Speaker 1: in Cell Hitler.
Speaker 2: You definitely nail the Elliott Rogers perspective for sure. Like,
Speaker 2: and it's so interesting too, because it seems like he
Speaker 2: skipped right to in cell, Like he didn't have this
Speaker 2: like game phase where he was even trying to make
Speaker 2: it work. He just immediately knew that he needed power
Speaker 2: of any kind to get anybody because he was such a.
Speaker 1: Zero because he yeah, there was otherwise no chance.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the entitlement, all of it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's uh hate it. It's gross. You know. I
Speaker 1: try not to like psychoanalyze how much of this was,
Speaker 1: like did he get into power because he went Like
Speaker 1: I think it was probably ancillary and everyone does things
Speaker 1: for a lot of reasons. But like you can't look
Speaker 1: at his backstory and not see that like frustrated kid
Speaker 1: who just like, yeah, doesn't understand why some people are
Speaker 1: good at that And he's not, and like he's pissed
Speaker 1: because of it.
Speaker 2: Well, and it's just like the entitlement as opposed to
Speaker 2: like growing yourself and making yourself a more rounded learning
Speaker 2: to dance. Yes exactly, I mean that, that's exactly. It's
Speaker 2: all these kind of guys. It's just like, just get
Speaker 2: a hobby that isn't just like trying to fuck somebody.
Speaker 2: It's like not just be a well rounded person in
Speaker 2: your own regard, and then people will be interesting for
Speaker 2: people to be interested in you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because his whole thing, And like in koubas X's book,
Speaker 1: it becomes like the way he portrays Hitler's like he
Speaker 1: loves talking about his opinions on everything, of course, but
Speaker 1: he's not good at much. No, he just loves to
Speaker 1: talk about what he thinks about things. Yeah, of course,
Speaker 1: And like learn to dance, man, that's.
Speaker 2: Kind of self important with nothing to back it up.
Speaker 1: It's just we don't care. Learn to dance.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like life's not that serious. Just like, learn to
Speaker 2: dance a little bit.
Speaker 1: Go do something besides yell at people. Hitler, Yeah, get
Speaker 1: a fucking dog, yeah, get a fucking dog. Well he
Speaker 1: did do that, and we will talk about how dogs
Speaker 1: play into his flirtation style soon, of course they do.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be gross. Brandy, you got some pluggables to plug.
Speaker 2: Yeah. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram at
Speaker 2: brand Dazzle b r A n d A z z
Speaker 2: l E. I have a podcast called Lady to Lady
Speaker 2: that's very fun every Wednesday me Barbara Gray Test Barker
Speaker 2: with a fourth guest every week. And then if you
Speaker 2: were in Los Angeles, I have a monthly show every
Speaker 2: second Saturday called Picture This that is it's the Virgil.
Speaker 2: It's a ten dollars show. It's a comedians paired up
Speaker 2: with animators, my live anime, your jokes during your set.
Speaker 2: It's very, very fun. We just had Pendleton Ward, the
Speaker 2: creator punch Time on the Last Last One.
Speaker 1: Awesome.
Speaker 2: Craig Bartlett does our show a lot. He's the creator,
Speaker 2: Hey Arnold, and we have people from like BoJack and
Speaker 2: thick Mouth and like all sorts of awesome cartoon shows.
Speaker 1: It's super smp oh man, it's crazy. Yeah, that's awesome.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's really fun. And second Saturday every month it's
Speaker 2: my favorite thing to do. And then I tour like
Speaker 2: half the year. So Brandy Posey dot com and yeah,
Speaker 2: that sounds.
Speaker 1: So much more gratifying than just talking about hitler sex life.
Speaker 1: It is, but if you're into Hitler's sex life, you
Speaker 1: should follow my Twitter. Yeah I met I right, Okay,
Speaker 1: you should follow this show's Twitter. At Bastards Pod. You
Speaker 1: find the sources for this episode and every episode on
Speaker 1: behind the Bastards dot com. Look us up on Tea Public,
Speaker 1: Behind the Bastards Tea Public, buy a shirt, wear it.
Speaker 1: Fight Hitler even though he's dead and you're not actually
Speaker 1: fighting him. Just buy a shirt and feel better. Yeah, ibitalism.
Speaker 1: You can find us on Twitter and on Instagram and
Speaker 1: at Bastards Pod. Sophie's in here, and this is a
Speaker 1: goddamn train wreck. Play me out, Johnny, We're back. Wait,
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm Robert Evans. This is Behind the Bastard Podcast.
Speaker 1: Bad people talk about Brandy Posey.
Speaker 2: That's me. We are here.
Speaker 1: It's part two, Part two. Hitler focks, Hitler fucks Boogoloo,
Speaker 1: Hitler dick. Everybody's thinking about it, and everybody's thinking about.
Speaker 2: It, everybody but Hitler's stupid dick.
Speaker 1: Hitler STUDI and I'm gonna guess you know he doesn't
Speaker 1: seem like a guy who did a lot of core
Speaker 1: strengthening exercises. So I'm going to guess a little little
Speaker 1: low energy.
Speaker 2: No, Yeah, Hitler is like, uh, like a like a
Speaker 2: like a five pump kind of guy.
Speaker 1: I know, I know what his hair would do because
Speaker 1: I can imagine like a sweat drenched fucking Hitler with
Speaker 1: just like that little thing flipping down on the front
Speaker 1: of it.
Speaker 2: He's just constantly just yeah, so mad, Like every organizasm
Speaker 2: makes him mad because it makes him happy.
Speaker 1: It just gets angrier and angrier the more he comes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly like Hitler. Why does it make me feel good?
Speaker 1: I don't understand is bad Hitler? That was going a
Speaker 1: little Russian there, a little a little yeah, I'm not
Speaker 1: great at accents. It's okay anyway, Uh, the podcast The Hitler.
Speaker 1: When we left off, we had just sort of established
Speaker 1: Hitler's youth in his young adulthood, the way his best
Speaker 1: friends talked about him and his sexual life, although after
Speaker 1: they were no longer his best friends. So again, I'll
Speaker 1: take everything you hear about Hitler with a little bit
Speaker 1: of salt.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: One thing we know about the guy for sure is
Speaker 1: that burkedis Goden was his happy place. It's basically a
Speaker 1: quiet mountain town where he had eventually built a giant
Speaker 1: fortress up there. But it was he had like a
Speaker 1: room on to the top of the mountain where he
Speaker 1: could stare pensively at it the skyline and contemplate being Hitler.
Speaker 2: He just needed Emo.
Speaker 1: I think he just needed like Elliot Smith would have
Speaker 1: saved the world lot of problems.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, I feel so seen, I feel so seen.
Speaker 2: He is also right life his pain. I understand him
Speaker 2: becoming a Transylvanian.
Speaker 1: So the accidents are going to be all over the
Speaker 1: fucking place. Well, oh boy. Now, in autumn of nineteen
Speaker 1: twenty six, Hitler took a trip to burke has Gotten
Speaker 1: in order to relax and plot the Nazi Party's next
Speaker 1: series of electoral coups. Well, he was staying at a
Speaker 1: fancy hotel.
Speaker 2: Oh writer's retreat.
Speaker 1: Yeah, basically a writer's retreat. Yeah, he was going up
Speaker 1: to Big Bear to like write, get his tight five down.
Speaker 2: Wonder if he also took a bunch of spinach with
Speaker 2: him that he didn't end up eating.
Speaker 1: Almost certainly, that's.
Speaker 2: Every writer's retreat I've ever gone on. I'm just like,
Speaker 2: I'm bringing nothing, but kale gets eaten. I just go
Speaker 2: to Taco Bell instead.
Speaker 1: Hitler had that experience.
Speaker 2: Too, Oh yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Now, while he was staying in a fancy hotel,
Speaker 1: Hitler metal lady named Maria writer Mimi to her friends. Now,
Speaker 1: young Mimi was in a rough spot in life. Her
Speaker 1: mom had died of cancer two weeks earlier. Her dad,
Speaker 1: a member of the Social Democratic Party, had pulled her
Speaker 1: out of her Catholic boarding school to help run the
Speaker 1: family clothing store. Now, the store was located in the
Speaker 1: bottom floor of the hotel where Hitler was staying, and
Speaker 1: Hitler saw her as soon as he arrived. Seemingly at once,
Speaker 1: this thirty seven year old politician saw a grieving sixteen
Speaker 1: year old girl and was like, I gotta give me
Speaker 1: some of that, Hitler, It's.
Speaker 2: The only moment his dad's ever been proud of him.
Speaker 1: Like, hell, there's one more. Okay, great, of course, probably
Speaker 1: a couple.
Speaker 2: Like father, uncle, like son and cousin uncle.
Speaker 1: Now, even at the time, sixteen was a bit young
Speaker 1: for a middle aged man to date. A yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: That became a pattern with Hitler. The older he grew
Speaker 1: the age of the girls he flirted with state the
Speaker 1: same yep yep tracks.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, I here's the thing. Nothing you've said is
Speaker 2: surprising to me. You're just like, yeah, no, I that
Speaker 2: fills in that part of the puzzles.
Speaker 1: In that part of the puzzle, it's just like picking
Speaker 1: up little pieces. This guy's not such a mystery. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel like I've known a.
Speaker 2: Few of him. It's mostly it's one of those like
Speaker 2: it's a puzzle of just like a piece of shit,
Speaker 2: but with no borders, so the puzzle just keeps expanding
Speaker 2: in every direction.
Speaker 1: Not only do I feel like I know this guy,
Speaker 1: I feel like I've stood in a police station with
Speaker 1: several friends and tried to warn the police about this guy.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, absolutely, it's yeah. It's one of those guys
Speaker 2: that you're like, just get out of there.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just maybe I should just duck and roll.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you just gotta you just gotta go. God, I
Speaker 2: hit on sixteen year old.
Speaker 1: That was one of the most like I was. I was.
Speaker 1: I've definitely told some gross jokes about women in my time,
Speaker 1: especially when I was like seventeen, eighteen years old. Like
Speaker 1: I grew up with the same toxic bullshit as everything else.
Speaker 1: One of the big things in my like change of
Speaker 1: mind state around this was just the fact that like
Speaker 1: coming to a realization throughout my twenties that like, well,
Speaker 1: every woman I know has been scared for her life
Speaker 1: at some point during a date. I'm just worried about like,
Speaker 1: am I tipping enough? Like is she gonna judge?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I like the stakes are very very different different, Yeah, like,
Speaker 2: oh I get it. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: Hitler's one of those guys today who would have made
Speaker 1: a lot of women scared.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, yeah exactly, and then been like, oh, it's
Speaker 2: your problem, it's your problem.
Speaker 1: It's like, no, man, I'm not sure what the accents are.
Speaker 2: Going to have a little bit of empathy the situation
Speaker 2: that might be different from yours.
Speaker 1: Yeah, uh so. Ian Kershaw notes quote Hitler preferred women
Speaker 1: much younger than himself, girls he could dominate who would
Speaker 1: be obedient, playthings but not get in his way. I
Speaker 1: guess he seems pretty accurate.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Hitler waited until he saw Mimi out of work,
Speaker 1: sitting on a bench in a nearby park with her
Speaker 1: sister playing with their dog, which, okay, better move than
Speaker 1: flirtin are at work? Wait till she's out and you know,
Speaker 1: a social public situation or whatever. She's not alone, so
Speaker 1: you're not like, you.
Speaker 2: Know, you could not with the work.
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if
Speaker 1: you're gonna like game like question Hitler so far solve
Speaker 1: of the opening moves you could not not terrible and
Speaker 1: in the fact that she's a literal teenager. So he
Speaker 1: goes up to this girl.
Speaker 2: What is this guy? A Republican potentially a senator from Louisiana.
Speaker 1: I was basically, what's going on?
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's not like this happens today.
Speaker 1: So he's a pretty big name in Germany in nineteen
Speaker 1: twenty six, and Mimi recognizes him immediately. Not a lot
Speaker 1: of guys look like Hitler. Yeah, yeah, that is one
Speaker 1: of he's Hitler.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's recognizable.
Speaker 1: He pretty much like that's a Hitler right there. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Did he have a mustache at this point?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we're about to talk about that. So Mimi
Speaker 1: later talked to interviewers and I'm going to quote the
Speaker 1: book explaining Hitler's kind of the way it put together
Speaker 1: her recollection of how Hitler flirted with her during this period. Quote,
Speaker 1: she describes the affair. In the language of a Harlequin
Speaker 1: romance novel, Hitler is the stiff, somewhat ruthless stranger who
Speaker 1: first appears with a dog and a whip, but is
Speaker 1: later melted into a schoolgirl fantasy lover by her charms.
Speaker 1: Quote from Mimi there is the famous Hitler, recently released
Speaker 1: from prison. She's told He was wearing breeches, a light
Speaker 1: vlure hat, she recalls, and his hand was a writing whip.
Speaker 1: He had warm, light gray stockings and a windbreaker that
Speaker 1: was held together by a leather belt. Beside him walked
Speaker 1: a beautiful shepherd. He sees her too, and is theatrically captivated.
Speaker 1: He asks Mimi's sister, could you introduce me to this bliss?
Speaker 1: Mimi is brought over. He transferred his writing whip from
Speaker 1: his right hand to his left, gave me his hand
Speaker 1: and looked at me with a piercing gaze, and praised
Speaker 1: her dog. The dog is really beautiful and well trained.
Speaker 1: You are really good at that. They talked about dogs
Speaker 1: for an hour. Hitler quote did not take his eyes
Speaker 1: off of Mimi. Then he very formally asked her sister
Speaker 1: Annie whether she would permit him to take Mimi for
Speaker 1: a walk. Sometime at that she Mimi got up and
Speaker 1: ran away. So this is the first meeting. Still she
Speaker 1: was fascinated in a starstrke way. He looks quite dashing
Speaker 1: with his breeches and his writing whip. There is one
Speaker 1: note that spoils the picture, his mustache, the funny flies
Speaker 1: she calls the black hairy growths between beneath Hitler's nose.
Speaker 1: He was still figuring out the mustache at this point.
Speaker 1: So she's I mean, she's a literal child, but isn't
Speaker 1: an entirely against it at first, but runs off when
Speaker 1: she's flirted with which again, this is fucking nineteen twenty six.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, And it's also like, at
Speaker 2: a certain point, having been like a young gal, that
Speaker 2: you kind of have to endure those things. You you're
Speaker 2: polite until you see an exit, and then you're like, okay,
Speaker 2: time to go. I'm not gonna Also, I'm not going
Speaker 2: to like outright rebuke you because you're in a position
Speaker 2: of power.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, it's weird because she recalls this as like
Speaker 1: a positive thing, Okay, see, but it's also like, yeah,
Speaker 1: she's recalling this years later, and like when she realizes
Speaker 1: that she essentially hooked up with the most famous man
Speaker 1: of the twentieth century. Yeah, so like some of this
Speaker 1: is going to be retroactively, she's going to make it
Speaker 1: like a thing. I don't know. I can't imagine being
Speaker 1: that position. So I'm not gonna judge Memi writer.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, she's a child.
Speaker 1: Also, she's sixteen. Yeah, yeah, he's the thirty seven year
Speaker 1: old approaching her. So Pitler invited Mimi and her sister
Speaker 1: to a Nazi party meeting where he was giving a speech.
Speaker 1: He wasn't allowed to give public speeches in nineteen twenty
Speaker 1: six condition of his parole. So he's an older man
Speaker 1: with a parole history. Like, who's on parole? Hit not
Speaker 1: a sixteen year old?
Speaker 2: What he is? What is he a what is he
Speaker 2: a line chef at a rib place?
Speaker 1: That's exactly how he mixed his money, fucking courtsy. He's
Speaker 1: got a tramsand.
Speaker 2: Oh god off, oh I know these guys.
Speaker 1: I've bought coke from Hitler.
Speaker 2: Oh man, yeah, absolutely, yeah, that's totally who Hitler is.
Speaker 2: Oh god, Oh, I remember working in a in a
Speaker 2: rib place when I was when I was a teenager
Speaker 2: in high school, Like this, I know this guy exactly.
Speaker 2: And there's this one chef that didn't talk to me
Speaker 2: at all until on on Valentine's Day he brought me
Speaker 2: a candy heart that had a picture of a moose
Speaker 2: on it and it said you a moose me okay.
Speaker 1: And I remember just being like, thanks, that's a move.
Speaker 2: I And then he had like a child, he had
Speaker 2: like a baby that he brought to one of my
Speaker 2: ship I was like, cool, glad, you're introduced me to
Speaker 2: your baby. I don't give a shit about this.
Speaker 1: So how long have you all been married?
Speaker 2: He's probably dead.
Speaker 1: I hope he is in a healthy society. That's what happens. Yeah,
Speaker 1: the Hitler like guide dies of a coke overdose in
Speaker 1: his car and at age thirty four.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, exactly, I just remember, man, No, that's who
Speaker 2: Hitler was, for sure. That's fucking fry cook.
Speaker 1: Was fry cook. In a healthy society, all our Hitlers
Speaker 1: are fry cooks. Yeah, and some of our fry cooks
Speaker 1: become Anthony Bourdaines, but none of our Anthony Boardines become Hitler's.
Speaker 2: No, none, no, no, absolutely not.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that's a healthy society.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway, uh so, yeah, Hitler since that this teenager
Speaker 1: was attracted to his fame, so he like really played
Speaker 1: that up. After this big event, he put her and
Speaker 1: her sister at the head table for dinner and sat
Speaker 1: them right next to him, so they felt like they
Speaker 1: were at the center of this big, important political meeting.
Speaker 1: I mean, it was a big important political the nts'
Speaker 1: woun up a charge.
Speaker 2: But it's funny like thinking about like from the perspective
Speaker 2: of the other Nazis in the room, just like, Oh,
Speaker 2: and Hitler has.
Speaker 1: Two children with the boss is hitting on a teenager.
Speaker 2: Cool this, We're on the right side of it.
Speaker 1: We're the right ones.
Speaker 2: We're the good guys.
Speaker 1: We're doing great.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we had a fucking cook, pedophile boss running a party.
Speaker 2: We're on the right side of history.
Speaker 1: I feel like we're the good guys. Yeah, which totally are.
Speaker 2: God.
Speaker 1: She later recalled, and I have to remind you she's
Speaker 1: talking about Hitler here. Quote. I was very embarrassed and blushed.
Speaker 1: It was as if he had organized the meeting just
Speaker 1: for me, as if all that counted for him now
Speaker 1: was to just conquer me. She was apparently feeling that
Speaker 1: during dinner, Hitler quote fed her pieces of cake like
Speaker 1: a little child. He treated her like a child, and
Speaker 1: then again like a grown woman. After dinner, he talked
Speaker 1: about her dead mom and told her that she had
Speaker 1: the same eyes as his dead mom. Hitler's game is
Speaker 1: pretty weird.
Speaker 2: Wow, god, oh, there's just so.
Speaker 1: Many lot of dead moms coming into how Hitler flirts.
Speaker 2: Oh, ma'am, show me a picture of your dead mom.
Speaker 1: I hear your Masa is dead.
Speaker 2: Show me mine. I'll show you your.
Speaker 1: Tragically dead mas off.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. Let's put their pictures together and make them kiss.
Speaker 2: Does this do anything for you? Just sixty nine are
Speaker 2: dead mom's faces. Is that what you like? Little child?
Speaker 1: This is how fuck? Yes?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, just whipping photos of somebody else's dead mother.
Speaker 1: Throw your mother's photo.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it watched me cut it and a half.
Speaker 1: Oh boy, god, oh boy. Yeah. So uh he followed
Speaker 1: that with uh or he followed with what Mimi described
Speaker 1: as a coarse sexual advance, although she unfortunately does not
Speaker 1: give the exact details of that. Yeah, give him the twenties.
Speaker 1: It might have been him complimenting her hands or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Completely innocent like that, well, not completely innocent. She was sixteen,
Speaker 1: he was thirty seven. But yeah, you get what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Uh. Later in the dinner, a guest asked Hitler why
Speaker 1: he wasn't married yet. This was a pretty common question
Speaker 1: for Hitler to get. He answered that, of course, he
Speaker 1: had to save Germany first. According to Mimi, though at
Speaker 1: the exact same time, quote Hitler touched my legs with
Speaker 1: his knee and heavily stepped on my toes with his shoe,
Speaker 1: a funny and rude hint at what he wanted to say.
Speaker 1: This works, This works on Memy, She says, it does
Speaker 1: at least you know, who knows how accurate her recollections.
Speaker 2: I mean, I get it because also, like being a
Speaker 2: sixteen year old girl at that point, it's this is like,
Speaker 2: this is all intoxicating, This is all very uh, it's
Speaker 2: all very complimentary.
Speaker 1: And not that the two men are similar, but he's
Speaker 1: like a similar level in national politics of someone like
Speaker 1: Beto overwork, where people are seriously talking this guy might
Speaker 1: be in charge soon. So there's that there's that dimension
Speaker 1: of this.
Speaker 2: YEA, yeah for sure. Well, and it's also like, you know,
Speaker 2: you've been forced to drop out of school by your dad,
Speaker 2: like your own mind's dead. Yeah, you're only way to
Speaker 2: a better life at this point is probably through a
Speaker 2: man to another situation, like you aren't really probably you
Speaker 2: aren't being primed to take.
Speaker 1: Over a business of your Your dad's a member of
Speaker 1: like the opposite political party, so maybe there's a little
Speaker 1: bit of that going on too, where my dad's gonna
Speaker 1: really hate this.
Speaker 2: But I'm bringing home the ultimate bad boy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's no better date than a bad boy than
Speaker 1: literally Hitler.
Speaker 2: Yeah seriously.
Speaker 1: Okay, So, based on what you know about Hitler's game
Speaker 1: so far, what would you expect his next step was
Speaker 1: after talking about his dead mom and then stomping on
Speaker 1: a girl's foot.
Speaker 2: I mean, maybe just like putting some of his dad's
Speaker 2: ashes on like lipstick and I'm asking for a kiss.
Speaker 1: Is that that would actually be less creepy? He chose
Speaker 1: animal abuse. Oh great, here's MEMI reader quote. We went
Speaker 1: out into the night. Hitler was about to put his
Speaker 1: arm around my shoulders and pull me towards him, when
Speaker 1: the two dogs suddenly attacked each other. Hitler suddenly intervened
Speaker 1: like a maniac. He hit his dog with his writing
Speaker 1: whip and shook him violently by the collar. He was
Speaker 1: very excited. I did not expect that he could hit
Speaker 1: his dog so brutally and ruthlessly, the dog which he
Speaker 1: had said he could not live without. Yet he beat
Speaker 1: up his loyal companion. How can you be so brutal
Speaker 1: and beat your dog like that? I asked, it was necessary,
Speaker 1: Hitler said, tenderly. He touched my shoulders. His mouth changed,
Speaker 1: His voice sounded sad. Don't you want to kiss me?
Speaker 1: He asked. She forces herself to say no, that they
Speaker 1: shouldn't see each other again. Hitler takes the reaction badly.
Speaker 1: He turned cold. Kindness disappeared from his face. Abruptly. He
Speaker 1: turned away, said Hyle and left. Yeah. I mean pro tip, Hitler,
Speaker 1: don't beat dogs on a first date.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have to say that. Yeah, I shouldn't have
Speaker 1: to say don't beat dogs.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, I shouldn't have to say it anyway. Maybe
Speaker 2: not on the first you know, you don't do that.
Speaker 1: Most experts say animal abuse is like a third date.
Speaker 2: Thanks you exactly.
Speaker 1: That's when you get that dog whip out. Yeah, ok, man,
Speaker 1: you and your goddamn whip.
Speaker 2: He spooned that dog that night and just whispered sweetenoughing
Speaker 2: to that poor dog's.
Speaker 1: Ear Oh, I really feel for that dog.
Speaker 2: Have all a Hitler's dogs, They just saw so many
Speaker 2: sad masturbations. Yeah, absolutely did.
Speaker 1: We don't think enough about the suffering dog kind went
Speaker 1: through during those years. No, it was it was rough,
Speaker 1: I know. Yeah, poor babes. Yeah. Now, Hitler, once rejected,
Speaker 1: was not about to give up on his dreams of
Speaker 1: conquering this girl, literally less than half of his age.
Speaker 1: He sent one of his men to Mimi's store the
Speaker 1: next day. This guy told Mimi that he'd never seen
Speaker 1: the boss so filled with love. Believe me, the man
Speaker 1: is on fire. Now. This got me me to give
Speaker 1: Hitler a second chance. Yeah, she agreed to a second
Speaker 1: and it wasn't quite a date, but she agreed to
Speaker 1: hang out with him again. He picked her up at
Speaker 1: work and took her in a ride in his Mercedes.
Speaker 1: He didn't drive, of course, his man Maurice handled the driving.
Speaker 1: Hitler couldn't drive. He sat next to Mimi in the back.
Speaker 1: Quote he took my hand and put it into his lap.
Speaker 1: Then he took my other hand as well and pressed it.
Speaker 1: Now I have your hands, and I have you, and
Speaker 1: I will keep you now, you know. Yeah, A big
Speaker 1: fan of Hitler's Hitler's Hitler's moves.
Speaker 2: I don't like his moves.
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't like.
Speaker 2: What Mimi needed, Like she needed like a Wilson through
Speaker 2: the fence advice.
Speaker 1: You had an older man going like, oh, you shouldn't
Speaker 1: be dating thirty seven year old Nazis. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she needed somebody to be on her side.
Speaker 1: Here some good adult advice. Oh god, I guess dad
Speaker 1: was grieving. I'm not gonna hit on him too hard,
Speaker 1: but it is kind of a failure of parenting if
Speaker 1: your daughter dates Hitler. Yeah, when she's sixteen. You know,
Speaker 1: adult kids can date Hitler. That's their mistake to make exactly.
Speaker 2: There's a couple of lessons that should have been taught better.
Speaker 1: Parenting at a few levels in this story would have
Speaker 1: really really helped with some problems. Yeah so uh. For
Speaker 1: their next date, Hitler took her to a graveyard to
Speaker 1: see her mom's grave. What happened next is just so
Speaker 1: strange that I I'm gonna read explaining Hitler's description because
Speaker 1: it's it's it's weird. Quote. Hitler's overcome thinking of his
Speaker 1: own mother, moved by something he did not want to
Speaker 1: tell me. What he said sounded very grave and utmost distress.
Speaker 1: I am not ready yet. Hitler, holding onto his writing whip,
Speaker 1: comforts as sobbing Mimi, and strangely chooses that moment to
Speaker 1: tell her, I you to call me Wolf. That was
Speaker 1: his preferred nickname Wolf. So he takes her to his
Speaker 1: mom's grave or her mom's grave, says he's not ready
Speaker 1: to fuck, and then asks her to call him Wolf.
Speaker 1: That was his favorite nickname. He thought it sounded cool.
Speaker 1: He made all his friends call him Wolf. Secret headquarters
Speaker 1: during the invasion of Russia was the wolf's lair. I'm
Speaker 1: just saying he would have been one of those guys
Speaker 1: with an unironic wolf howling at the moon shirt.
Speaker 2: You can't tell people your nickname.
Speaker 1: No, then it's not a nickname. Then it's narcissism. Yes,
Speaker 1: if you get a cool nickname, congratulations. Yeah, but you
Speaker 1: gotta earn it.
Speaker 2: Yes, you won't get to pick your own. Yeah, it's bullshit.
Speaker 1: You know what you do get to pick of your
Speaker 1: own is the products and services that you spend your
Speaker 1: money and or commerce units to purchase. ADS. We're back, A,
Speaker 1: we're back. We just enjoyed the freedom of choice that
Speaker 1: Hitler would not have approved of. Although, actually, if we're
Speaker 1: gonna be really honest, the Nazi regime was seriously in
Speaker 1: bed with the capitalist interest in Germany at the time
Speaker 1: and phrased a lot of what they were doing as
Speaker 1: a defense of free trade against unionism.
Speaker 2: But yeah, that's a whole that's another podcast product.
Speaker 1: Owners talking about his dick to day god, not the
Speaker 1: entanglements of fascism and capitalism throughout history, his little modern day. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a little little wolf wolfy, wolf Wolfy. So on
Speaker 1: their fourth date, Hitler decided to make his move on
Speaker 1: Mimi Reader. He took her out for a walk in
Speaker 1: the woods and said romantic things to her and then
Speaker 1: asked her to kiss him, which is, you know, a
Speaker 1: pretty timeless move.
Speaker 2: That's a pretty classic date. I mean, to be fair,
Speaker 2: we're going we're going.
Speaker 1: From mom's grave.
Speaker 2: Mom's grave. Well, no, we're going from a from like
Speaker 2: a dinner where he's given a step.
Speaker 1: From fascist political meeting. Date one where he beats a
Speaker 1: dog at the end. Two, middle aged guy takes you
Speaker 1: on a ride in his Mercedes. Date three, Mom's grave. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it tells you to call him wolf wow. And then
Speaker 1: Date four walk in the woods, okay.
Speaker 2: I mean the most normal of the dates so.
Speaker 1: Far is the walk in the woods.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1: It's solid fourth date. It's a decent time to make
Speaker 1: that move if you're you know, she's sixteen, Jesus Hitler. Okay,
Speaker 1: so here's mamie quote. I could feel how he clenched
Speaker 1: his fists. I could see how he was fighting with himself,
Speaker 1: my child, I could squash you in my arms at
Speaker 1: this very moment, I did not resist any longer. His
Speaker 1: true self had come out.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is what Hitler says in this first kiss,
Speaker 1: maybe his first kiss ever. Yeah, maybe not. Hitler told
Speaker 1: her that he wanted her to have his blonde Airyan babies,
Speaker 1: but wind that he didn't have the time right now,
Speaker 1: what with his mission to save Germany. How many times
Speaker 1: have you just told me? I mean, speaking as a man,
Speaker 1: we've all used that line. Oh yeah, I gotta save Germany, baby,
Speaker 1: I just can't help it. I just Germany.
Speaker 2: You know you're gonna last thirty seconds a piece of
Speaker 2: shit like please, you've got the time now.
Speaker 1: Hitler promised to buy an apartment in Berlin for them once.
Speaker 1: You know, he was more successful with you know, He
Speaker 1: made promises about the kind of the furniture they'd buy
Speaker 1: and all this stuff. He told her they'd be together forever,
Speaker 1: but then he left burkedis gotten and ignored her for months.
Speaker 2: This is the worst Springsteen song.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he just ghosts her, Yeah, ghost her for a
Speaker 1: long time. When he returned to the mountains, finally he
Speaker 1: didn't visit her. Being a teenager, Mimi did not take
Speaker 1: this very well. Yeah, yeah, well, yeah.
Speaker 2: It's okay, buddy, if you're gonna we're gonna go here.
Speaker 2: Let's do this.
Speaker 1: Let's do this. I mean, all sorts of pictures appeared
Speaker 1: in my mind, faces of other women and Hitler smiling
Speaker 1: at them. I did not want to go on living. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So she attempted suicide, trying to hang herself on a
Speaker 1: door handle with a clothesline.
Speaker 2: Damn, Memi.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, she went for it. Her brother in law
Speaker 1: came in at the last minute and saved her. And
Speaker 1: according to Mimi, her brother in law had came to
Speaker 1: save her after he had gotten a message from Hitler
Speaker 1: that Hitler had just sent to him, explaining that he
Speaker 1: hadn't been seeing Mimi recently because he'd been black man
Speaker 1: by someone who'd sent a letter to the Nazi Party
Speaker 1: office claiming that Hitler was seducing underage girls. So basically
Speaker 1: months later, Hitler comes in and is like, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: somebody was talking about us, and I had to like
Speaker 1: go dark because it would have hurt the success of
Speaker 1: my political party. Yeah. If like we'd kept our thing up,
Speaker 1: so that's his.
Speaker 2: Excuse, the truth would have come out. Yeah, and oh
Speaker 2: so it's like he knows it's not supposed to be
Speaker 2: doing that.
Speaker 1: Yes, and this is not a lot of times when
Speaker 1: you talk about people dating teenagers whatever in the past.
Speaker 1: He was definitely more normal back then.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Again, this was a political liability for a thirty seven
Speaker 1: year old. It wouldn't have been weird if he'd been
Speaker 1: twenty five and dating a sixteen year old, that would
Speaker 1: have been pretty normal for Austria in nineteen twenty six. Over
Speaker 1: twenty years, this is weird. Yeah, Yeah, what he's doing
Speaker 1: is weird and he knows it.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So Mimi claims that she found out later that
Speaker 1: the letters you know, sent into the Nazi Party office
Speaker 1: were actually written by a woman who was close to
Speaker 1: Hitler and jealous of his relationship with Mimi. It was
Speaker 1: possibly this lady who was like his bodyguard slash chauffeur,
Speaker 1: who was like in love with him. He may have
Speaker 1: also fucked. We don't really know that much about that relationship.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of rumored relationships that we don't have
Speaker 1: confirmation of, but one thing that is confirmed is that
Speaker 1: the Nazis were unbelievably catty bitches. There was tons of drops,
Speaker 1: tons of blackmail within the Nazis. Oh yeah, gross, and
Speaker 1: they were all fucking with each other.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and they're all fucking messy. Just a bunch of.
Speaker 1: Messy bitches, messy messy bitches. Yeah, yeah, that's the Nazis.
Speaker 1: So Mimi and Hitler drifted apart for a while. The
Speaker 1: whole relationship was a huge deal for her, but it
Speaker 1: seems to have been more of a bump on the
Speaker 1: road for Hitler. During this time, he repeatedly flirted with
Speaker 1: his best friend, Honstegele's wife, as well as Henrietta Hoffman,
Speaker 1: the daughter of his photographer and fiance of Balder von Shirock,
Speaker 1: one of his top Nazis. Hitler dated or at least
Speaker 1: made moves on, Jenny Howe, one of his drivers, and
Speaker 1: the bodyguard lady had talked about maybe the woman who
Speaker 1: sent the letter. It's hard to tell how true all
Speaker 1: the different rumors about women Hitler might have been with was,
Speaker 1: But it seems like by the mid twenties he's famous
Speaker 1: enough that like a lot of people are falling for
Speaker 1: his charms. Yeah, yeah, largely for his fame. To Ian
Speaker 1: Kershaw quote, None of his liaisons, it seems, had been
Speaker 1: more than superficial. No deep feelings were ever stirred. Women
Speaker 1: were for Hitler a sport, an adornment in a men's world,
Speaker 1: whether in the men's home in Vienna, the regiment during
Speaker 1: the war, the Munich barracks until his discharge, and his
Speaker 1: regular gatherings of party cronies in Cafe Neumau or a
Speaker 1: cafe Heck in the nineteen twenties. Hitler's environment had always
Speaker 1: been overwhelmingly male. Very occasionally a woman would be admitted
Speaker 1: into our intimate circle recalled Heinrik Kaufman, but she never
Speaker 1: was allowed to become the center of it, and had
Speaker 1: to remain seen but not heard. She could occasionally take
Speaker 1: a small part in the conversation, but never was she
Speaker 1: allowed to hold forth or to contradict Hitler.
Speaker 2: Oh, I love a silent wife.
Speaker 1: Silent and dumb. That's the way Hitler likes him. A silent, sorry,
Speaker 1: quiet woman who's barely alive. God Hitler. Now. Hitler's next
Speaker 1: confirmed flame was with Gelly Raubel, his half niece. Oh, sick, sick,
Speaker 1: here we go. You can't stop a Hitler male from
Speaker 1: fucking his own niece. He cannot stay away from blood.
Speaker 1: It's the thing. What a two generations, the guys fucking.
Speaker 1: There's the same age when they start to So he
Speaker 1: met her when she was fourteen years old. Her father
Speaker 1: had died when she was young, and her mother worked
Speaker 1: as a housekeeper. They were poor. Hitler did wait until
Speaker 1: she was sixteen. Oh well, what a gentleman, What a gentleman.
Speaker 1: And that's the age when Uncle Alf, as she called him,
Speaker 1: asked her and her mom to move to Munich and
Speaker 1: become his housekeepers. Now for them, it would have seemed
Speaker 1: like a real upgrade, because he was a very powerful
Speaker 1: man by this point. He set Gilly and Angela up
Speaker 1: in an apartment, and while her mom cleaned house, Hitler
Speaker 1: took his teenage niece out on the town. He found
Speaker 1: out she wanted to be a singer and r Kelly
Speaker 1: like started paying for music lessons and promising to make
Speaker 1: her famous. Yeah, like it's all tracks, it's all tracks.
Speaker 1: It's not just he was just one of these guys,
Speaker 1: he was all of them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's the prototype for I mean before him too,
Speaker 2: but it's like he really is just greatest hits all around.
Speaker 2: How many was he into?
Speaker 1: Jello? What's he was he druggon lady?
Speaker 2: Yes, you look super Innogella at any.
Speaker 1: Point, yeah, I mean credit where it's due. That might
Speaker 1: be an area where Cosby innovated on Hitler. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, although, yeah,
Speaker 1: there's some other crimes coming up hereself. Over the next
Speaker 1: year or so, Hitler fell increasingly in love with his
Speaker 1: teenage niece. This did not go over well with his
Speaker 1: inner circle. Han Stangle hated Gelly, calling her an empty
Speaker 1: headed slut with the coarse sort of bloom of a
Speaker 1: servant girl, which is some real sexist rich guys.
Speaker 2: Shit. Yeah, please blame the child that was brought here
Speaker 2: by the adult man in power.
Speaker 1: Yeah, please please please. Yeah. Also, if he'd known Hitler's
Speaker 1: family history, he would have known servants were sort of
Speaker 1: the family thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's kind of how it works out for them.
Speaker 1: Weird that he and his dad both not only sleep
Speaker 1: with their nieces but both bring them in as like
Speaker 1: serving girls.
Speaker 2: How aware do you think Hitler was of that relationship.
Speaker 1: I don't know, Okay, there's a lot of rumors that
Speaker 1: he was to an extent and he was trying to
Speaker 1: keep it from people.
Speaker 2: Because I'm just wondering if that's like him trying to
Speaker 2: like normalize how his parents got together in some way.
Speaker 2: Maybe he even was thinking that consciously.
Speaker 1: I'm certain it wasn't conscious, but that may that may
Speaker 1: have been a factor, yes, and being like wanting to
Speaker 1: sort of be like, well, no, you know, if I'm
Speaker 1: like the biggest man in Germany and this is what
Speaker 1: I do, then it wasn't messed up how I grew up. Yeah, fine,
Speaker 1: and I don't have to think about it that much.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. No. My mother, aunt.
Speaker 1: Wife, my mother aunt wife, cousin. Yeah, that's great. So
Speaker 1: Putsy had to admit still that the infatuation his furre
Speaker 1: had with this teenage girl was pretty significant. He said
Speaker 1: that she quote had the effect of making him behave
Speaker 1: like a man in love. He hovered at her elbow
Speaker 1: in a very plausible imitation of adolescent infatuation, so Gilly
Speaker 1: wound up having an affair with Hitler's longtime show for
Speaker 1: Emil Maurice forgave her but fired Maurice Ye. When a
Speaker 1: local Nazi party leader named munder Wind that Gelly was
Speaker 1: distracting Hitler from politics, Hitler fired munder Yeah. For a while,
Speaker 1: Gilly Rabble threatened to derail the coming of the Third Reich,
Speaker 1: and tie Hitler started canceling plans for speeches and meetings
Speaker 1: to take her on picnics. Now, Gelly's probably the single
Speaker 1: most controversial piece of Hitler's backstory. Off the top of
Speaker 1: my head, the only thing historians debate more vociferously about
Speaker 1: Hitler is whether or not he was like an active
Speaker 1: or passive participant in the Holocaust. Like, those are like
Speaker 1: two of the things that are most questioned about this guy.
Speaker 2: Interesting.
Speaker 1: The relationship is, among other things, the origin of the
Speaker 1: Hitler liked poop myth. So that's where we're going next.
Speaker 2: Oh hell yeah, yeah, you know. It's just sometimes you
Speaker 2: think you're just gonna have a Friday, and here it.
Speaker 1: Is, and here it is, here it is. It does
Speaker 1: feel great. So in nineteen twenty nine, Hitler bought the
Speaker 1: gigantic apartment that he'd first promised Mimi Reader, but he
Speaker 1: was over her, so he moved his seventeen year old niece,
Speaker 1: and Glly's mother was sent off to Burkedis Goden to
Speaker 1: keep Hitler's holiday at home claim and to keep her
Speaker 1: away from Hitler and her daughter. So Gelly and Hitler
Speaker 1: lived in separate bedrooms but on the same floor. And
Speaker 1: now our main sources for this particular story about the
Speaker 1: relationship come from a journalist named Conrad Heyden and our
Speaker 1: old pal Honstangle. They also come from Gregor Strasser, a
Speaker 1: former Nazi who fell out with Hitler. So all these
Speaker 1: stories are from very anti Hitler people who have reason
Speaker 1: to exaggerate things, which is the way I bring that up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I just like that they've got a real
Speaker 2: like I love Lucy's set up in their house.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, it's very much that, but with poop.
Speaker 1: So Vanity Fair quotes all of these sources, and I'm
Speaker 1: going to read their kind of recollection of events, starting
Speaker 1: with Heiden quote, Hitler wrote the young girl a letter
Speaker 1: couched in the most unmistakable terms. It was a letter
Speaker 1: in which the uncle and lover gave himself completely away.
Speaker 1: It expressed feelings which could be expected from a man
Speaker 1: with masochistic copprofile inclinations, bordering on what Havelock Ellis calls undinism.
Speaker 1: The letter probably would have been repulsive to Gelly if
Speaker 1: she had received it, but she never did. Hitler left
Speaker 1: the letter lying around, and it fell into the hands
Speaker 1: of his landlady's son, a certain doctor Rudolph. The letter
Speaker 1: was bound to debase Hitler and make him ridiculous in
Speaker 1: the eyes of anyone who might see it. Hitler seems
Speaker 1: to have feared that it was Rudolph's intention to make
Speaker 1: it public. So co profile is obviously loving poop, and
Speaker 1: udinism is loving to be urinated on. So that's that's
Speaker 1: how this journalist sort of describes this mythical letter. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Hitler almost sends Gelly, but it gets intercepted, and then
Speaker 1: another Nazi is like threatening the blackmail Hitler with it.
Speaker 2: I see again, that's an intense letter. How many rough
Speaker 2: drafts you go do you go through?
Speaker 1: Before you were telling your niece you want to poop
Speaker 1: in her? Yeah? Or be pooped in by her?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know, man, we'd have to ask John
Speaker 1: McAfee that so putsi. Honpstangle told a pretty similar story
Speaker 1: in his biography, but he claims that the pornographic content
Speaker 1: was different. Rather than a letter about his desire to
Speaker 1: be pooped in by Gelly, Honstangle claims that the thing
Speaker 1: that got intercepted was Hitler's nude sketches of his niece.
Speaker 1: He describes the drawings as depraved, intimate sketches of Gelly
Speaker 1: rabble with every anatomical detail, which could have meant that
Speaker 1: it was something we'd consider really weird to be on
Speaker 1: the pale, or could have meant that he was just
Speaker 1: drawing porn of a girl. He thought it was his girlfriend,
Speaker 1: I mean s gross because she's his seventeen year old niece.
Speaker 1: But it might not have been a poo thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it could just be like a nude photos or yeah,
Speaker 2: new drawings.
Speaker 1: Now, the most direct story we have, or most direct
Speaker 1: evidence we have of the Hitler liked poop myth, comes
Speaker 1: from Otto Strasser. Now, Otto was a leading figure in
Speaker 1: the Nazi Party for a while and then fell a
Speaker 1: foul of the party. His brother, who was also a Nazi,
Speaker 1: was murdered, and Otto became like a critic of the regime,
Speaker 1: and he wrote about this in a nineteen forty book
Speaker 1: that he published after he had fallen out with the party.
Speaker 1: So again grain assault. Here otto Strasser claims that basically,
Speaker 1: after a period of excitement, Gilly got bored of being
Speaker 1: Hitler's girlfriend, since Hitler believed he had to present an
Speaker 1: image of being available and married to Germany. Hitler's handler's
Speaker 1: like kind of thought that hitler sex appeal was a
Speaker 1: big part of Nazism's draw and if it was known
Speaker 1: that he had a girlfriend, like women wouldn't vote for
Speaker 1: him and then he wouldn't be able to win election,
Speaker 1: which they may have been right about.
Speaker 2: There's something, I mean, there's something there, I guess, yeah.
Speaker 1: It's hard to say. This was like pretty soon after
Speaker 1: women got the vote too, so like people were, I mean,
Speaker 1: people were sexist for a lotteries of thing.
Speaker 2: Got to vote for an available.
Speaker 1: Mass sexy Hitler and if she.
Speaker 2: Sees my ballad, I'll get to be missus Hitler. Yeah, yeah, exactly,
Speaker 2: missus Hitler.
Speaker 1: So basically Strausser claimed that, like Gelly was really bored
Speaker 1: all the time, and it was like really frustrated and
Speaker 1: depressed at not being able to go out with her boyfriend,
Speaker 1: and finally Hitler like allowed him Strasser to take Gelly
Speaker 1: out to a Marty Gral party because he was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'll let you do something, but I can't go with
Speaker 1: you because it'll look bad, So you go with my friend.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So. Strausser claims that during this party, they were sitting
Speaker 1: down at a table and talking and she opened up
Speaker 1: to him with a very emotional horror story. Quote from Strausser.
Speaker 1: Hitler made her undress while he would lie out on
Speaker 1: the floor. Then she would have to squat down over
Speaker 1: his face where he could examine her at close range,
Speaker 1: and this made him very excited. When the excitement reached
Speaker 1: its peak, he demanded that she urinate on him, and
Speaker 1: that gave him his sexual pleasure. Gilly said the whole
Speaker 1: performance was extremely disgusting to her, and although it was
Speaker 1: sexually stimulating, it gave her no gratification. So cool, Cool,
Speaker 1: what a party, What a party?
Speaker 2: The German party? Pties man? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, and again Strasser hated Hitler by that point and
Speaker 1: may have just been trying to slander his name. Other
Speaker 1: reports of Gelly and Hitler's relationship say that it was
Speaker 1: about as normal as a sexual liaison between a niece
Speaker 1: and her uncle could be. We don't know what they
Speaker 1: got up to. What we do know is that in
Speaker 1: nineteen thirty one, at the cusp of Hitler reaching power,
Speaker 1: Mimi Reader came back into his life. Oh, this is
Speaker 1: while he's living with Gelly.
Speaker 2: She's like a legal age at this time and not
Speaker 2: even related to him.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's like eighteen now wow, yeah, okay, So while
Speaker 1: Hitler's living with and banging his niece, Mimi Reader comes
Speaker 1: into town. She'd married a guy in the intervening years,
Speaker 1: but dumped him, you know, a little bit in and
Speaker 1: basically traveled to Munich for a Hitler booty call. So
Speaker 1: this is her version of events as described by the
Speaker 1: book Explaining Hitler. She quote calls Hitler's adjutant, Julia Shaub,
Speaker 1: informed that Mimi is in town. Hitler tells Shaub bring
Speaker 1: her over. Mimi places the episode that follows in the
Speaker 1: summer of nineteen thirty one, when Hitler was living in
Speaker 1: his big new apartment with Gilly Rabble. Now, Mimi claims
Speaker 1: that during this visit, I let everything happen, So they
Speaker 1: had sex. This is like one of the first confirmations
Speaker 1: we have, and she doesn't give us a lot of
Speaker 1: detail about this. We know that Hitler has a booty
Speaker 1: call with Mimi in early summer or whatever nineteen thirty one,
Speaker 1: and then not a whole long while later, maybe just
Speaker 1: a couple of weeks, maybe a few days, Kelly Rabble
Speaker 1: commits suicide. No yeahikes. Now. There are a number of
Speaker 1: theories as to why. One says she was jealous that
Speaker 1: Hitler had slept with Mimi, and being nineteen at the time,
Speaker 1: took the most dramatic revenge she could imagine. Another theory
Speaker 1: says she started an affair with a Jewish dance teacher
Speaker 1: in Vienna and was about to leave Hitler, and so
Speaker 1: he had her murdered. Some of the versions say that
Speaker 1: he murdered her himself. Yet another variant is that she
Speaker 1: wanted to leave for Vienna because she was just bored,
Speaker 1: but Hilly refused to let her go, and she killed
Speaker 1: herself in protest, because again, she was nineteen. Either way,
Speaker 1: one detail is consistent across all these stories. Kelly Rabble
Speaker 1: entered Hitler's room, found his six point five millimeter Mouser handgun,
Speaker 1: and shot herself dead through the chest. Wow, which again
Speaker 1: is part of why people think it might have been
Speaker 1: a murder because she shot herself off.
Speaker 2: That's a hard shot to take.
Speaker 1: But it's also not uncommon for women who commit suicide
Speaker 1: with guns to avoid shooting themselves in the head.
Speaker 2: Interesting.
Speaker 1: Yeah, wow, so huh, nobody knows. This is debated to
Speaker 1: this day. There are people right now who are trying
Speaker 1: to have her body exhumed in order to like to
Speaker 1: and like think that they found out. Like it's a
Speaker 1: big controversy and stuff. Still, we don't really know what happened. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was a massive scandal at the time. People thought
Speaker 1: it was going to derail Hitler's political career, right on
Speaker 1: the cusp of Rice into power. The Nazi Party immediately
Speaker 1: responded with like basically claiming that she'd killed herself because
Speaker 1: she was nervous over an upcoming music recital. Yeah, the
Speaker 1: body was taken away courtesy of the Bavarian Minister of Justice,
Speaker 1: who was a Nazi sympathizer. Her death was declared a
Speaker 1: suicide after a quick inquest. It was all clearly shushed
Speaker 1: up by the Nazis in the government, and like the
Speaker 1: fact that law enforcement was fans with the Nazis. The
Speaker 1: whole story is it's really hard to like grasp exactly
Speaker 1: what happened here. There's certainly a good chance she was murdered,
Speaker 1: but there's at least an equally good chance that she
Speaker 1: was just driven to suicide by her relationship with Hitler.
Speaker 2: Well, and she'd also been like so isolated at this point,
Speaker 2: like your whole world is this guy, and it doesn't
Speaker 2: let you leave anywhere.
Speaker 1: And it's like, yeah, I can see learning about him
Speaker 1: screwing Mimi when she's living with him could have made
Speaker 1: her commit suicide. I can see how she might not
Speaker 1: have known that at all and just been fed up
Speaker 1: by it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, driving women to suicide, along with flirting via
Speaker 1: whip was sort of Hitler's thing. Robert Waite, a psychologist,
Speaker 1: wrote a psychoanalytical biography of Hitler titled The Psychopathic God. Now,
Speaker 1: wait is like the first guy who got Langer's oss
Speaker 1: report to classified, and he's definitely a member of the
Speaker 1: Hitler was into weird shit sexually camp. So a lot
Speaker 1: of his conclusions are really debatable, but he makes a
Speaker 1: decent case to suggest that Hitler was doing something fucked
Speaker 1: up to the girls he liked. Quote the idea that
Speaker 1: Hitler had a sexual perversion particularly abhorrent to women is
Speaker 1: further supported by a statistic. Of the seven women who
Speaker 1: we can be reasonably sure had intimate relations with Hitler,
Speaker 1: six committed suicide are seriously attempted. So damn, oh so
Speaker 1: something something, something fucked up?
Speaker 2: God damn. Yeah, he's up in some bad business.
Speaker 1: Doesn't have to be kinky sex. Even more likely, maybe
Speaker 1: that he's just really emotionally abusive being Hitler.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, something about you know, he doesn't seem
Speaker 2: like a supportive boyfriend.
Speaker 1: Does not seem like a supportive boyfriend.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, this is a he's yeah, he's
Speaker 2: weaving some bullshit in your ears.
Speaker 1: Suicide is the single biggest through line, rather than poop,
Speaker 1: of Hitler's sex life.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Ava Brown, who was Hitler's wife eventually, who Hitler met
Speaker 1: in nineteen twenty nine while she was seventeen years old
Speaker 1: and he was in his forties, attempted suicide in nineteen
Speaker 1: thirty two and again in nineteen thirty five, and then
Speaker 1: obviously committed suicide with him in nineteen forty five. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there were two attempts before that point.
Speaker 2: Wow, while they were still together.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Wow, well, well ish, we'll see we'll talk about that. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Frau Inga Leh, another possible Hitler lover, successfully committed suicide.
Speaker 1: So did Renat Muller and Susie Liptauer. We don't know
Speaker 1: a lot about most of these relationships. Gelly, Mimi, and
Speaker 1: Eva are the only women we get a lot of
Speaker 1: detail about, and Mimi is the only lover who survived
Speaker 1: fucking Hitler long enough to give a detailed interview. It
Speaker 1: turns out that being in love with the leader of
Speaker 1: the German Reich was even more dangerous than fighting in Stalingrad.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna talk about why that may have been
Speaker 1: and about some of the things that we do know
Speaker 1: about his sex life from some of these women the
Speaker 1: other details. But first is an ad transition.
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's do some ads.
Speaker 1: Let's do some ads. Don't think about Hitler's sweaty balls. Well,
Speaker 1: you think about these products. Damn it, that's a really
Speaker 1: bad ad pivot. I'm glad Sophie's not here. She's gonna
Speaker 1: be really pissed at that products.
Speaker 2: We're back, all right, Okay, what a nice break from
Speaker 2: thinking about his shitty sweaty balls.
Speaker 1: He shitty sweaty balls or ball or ball who knows
Speaker 1: who knows well? As doctor said, not but okay, I
Speaker 1: don't know. It's a good song. So one of the
Speaker 1: women who committed suicide and is believed to have been
Speaker 1: a lover of Hitler was a Renaatee Muller. She was
Speaker 1: an actress, and she got to tell a little bit
Speaker 1: of her story before leaping out of a window and
Speaker 1: falling to her death in nineteen thirty seven. Damn yeah,
Speaker 1: so I'll quote Vanity Fair. These stories came from the
Speaker 1: guy who was her director, so we don't have heard
Speaker 1: directly being quoted on this. A guy who worked with
Speaker 1: her later told the OSS about like what had gone
Speaker 1: down between them? Quote her director. One A. Zeisler later
Speaker 1: told the OSS that she had confided in him shortly
Speaker 1: after spending a night with Hitler in the Reich's Chancellery,
Speaker 1: how distress she was that the nature of the sexual
Speaker 1: practices Hitler demanded of her, of which, to her mortification,
Speaker 1: she complied. She claimed Hitler fell on the floor and
Speaker 1: begged her to kick him, condemned himself as unworthy, and
Speaker 1: just groveled in an agonizing manner. The scene became intolerable
Speaker 1: to her, and finally she acceded to his wishes. As
Speaker 1: she continued to kick him, he became more and more excited.
Speaker 1: So that's a really different one. That's like Hitler liked
Speaker 1: being and that's to me more belie than some of
Speaker 1: the like a lot of powerful men they want to
Speaker 1: be talking about sex workers like that's what these guys
Speaker 1: go in for.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, exactly, like they want to be they want
Speaker 2: to be the sub.
Speaker 1: I don't have any trouble imagining Hitler wanting a woman
Speaker 1: to just kick him a bunch. No, he like masturbates
Speaker 1: on the floor. That's yeah, Yeah, that's that kind of
Speaker 1: sounds like the Hitler we know. Yeah, No, that's that.
Speaker 2: That definitely sounds way more because it's like there's a
Speaker 2: lot of self hate going on, so it's like being
Speaker 2: able to actually like exercise that party yourself.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that seems for sure. Yeah, I can see how
Speaker 1: that happened.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that also just makes a lot of sense
Speaker 2: with like it would be very difficult to reconcile those
Speaker 2: two things if you were a woman that like knew
Speaker 2: that versus the image of the world that yeah Hitler,
Speaker 2: that you knew, So that would be. I mean, I
Speaker 2: can see how that would help with the suicide, or.
Speaker 1: It's it's there's also a lot of people who suspect
Speaker 1: that she did not commit suicide, that she was murdered
Speaker 1: because she knew about Hitler's sexual preferences, because she was
Speaker 1: kind of you know, dropped out a window in nineteen
Speaker 1: five thirty seven, might have been thrown. Yeah, we'll never know.
Speaker 1: This whole state was controlled by the Nazis by that point,
Speaker 1: so you're not getting a good in quest or anything.
Speaker 2: Well, it's like, how many of these women, Like, was
Speaker 2: it actually suicide versus murder?
Speaker 1: Well, that's that every nobody knows. With Gelly either, Like,
Speaker 1: it's possible they were all murdered and none of them
Speaker 1: killed themselves. A man with Hitler, I don't have trouble believing,
Speaker 1: like Eva Brown definitely tried to kill herself beforehand. So
Speaker 1: I also I suspect it's a mix. I suspect one
Speaker 1: or two of these women were murdered. Yeah, some of
Speaker 1: them committed suicide. Whatever the case, being with Hitler is
Speaker 1: not great for her long term SERVI what good again?
Speaker 1: Mimi Readers the only one we get along, which you know,
Speaker 1: she's kind of Hitler is the romance character in her
Speaker 1: recollection of things, but like she lived through it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: if that seems to be pretty hard, Yeah, damn really
Speaker 1: dodged a bullet there. Bullet Eva Brown did not dodge.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: I think people who focus too much on the possibility
Speaker 1: of sexual deviance and Hitler kind of might have some
Speaker 1: kind of bad intentions under the surface. I feel like
Speaker 1: focusing on that on like the weird sex aspect of things, yeah,
Speaker 1: is a way to make him seem less scary. Like
Speaker 1: calling him a sexual serial killer. Oh h actually makes
Speaker 1: him less scary because if Hitler's like a serial killer
Speaker 1: doing all of these things because he's just Jeffrey Dahmer
Speaker 1: in charge of a nation, or if he'n some poop
Speaker 1: fiending sex monster, then he's not a normal human being
Speaker 1: like all of us.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. Well, And it's also like that's also demonizing
Speaker 2: those sexual practices where it's like, you know, your king's
Speaker 2: to your kinks as long as they're consensual, there's something
Speaker 2: the matter with them.
Speaker 1: Whether or not Hitler was poopin in people's mouths, A
Speaker 1: lot of people who didn't become Hitler were pooping in
Speaker 1: each other's mouth. Yes, and it's fine.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Now, Martin Amos, best selling English author, is very
Speaker 1: much a proponent of the weird sex view of Hitler.
Speaker 1: He was behind one of these recent waves of Hitler
Speaker 1: kink's stories, one that hit back in twenty fourteen because
Speaker 1: during a speech he started making claims that he believed.
Speaker 1: He basically claimed that this was a typical sexual encounter
Speaker 1: in the life of Adolf Hitler. Quote, he would fortify
Speaker 1: his underpants with clean serviettes and napkins, and then he
Speaker 1: would go into some sort of excitation with Ava Brown,
Speaker 1: staying at a safe distance. So Amos believes that, and
Speaker 1: I'm going to quote from an article about him. There
Speaker 1: are three schools of thought when it comes to Hitler's sexuality.
Speaker 1: One is normality, which Amos says that he can be
Speaker 1: immediately thrown out because it is impossible to see Hitler
Speaker 1: as a considerate and energetic lover. The next one is
Speaker 1: a sexuality, and the third ist perversion. Now, this belief
Speaker 1: is in line with what spurned Nazis like han Stangle
Speaker 1: and Strasser claim, and is also in line with the
Speaker 1: Languer report, but very much out of line with the
Speaker 1: recollections of Mimi Reader, who probably did fuck him, and
Speaker 1: says that he was pretty normal outside, like he was
Speaker 1: a weird guy, but like in terms of the way
Speaker 1: he fucked nothing that crazy. Yeah, yeah, Hitler Sixter Paula
Speaker 1: does believe Mimi Reader was like the love of Hitler's life,
Speaker 1: and a lot of other people will say that Gelly
Speaker 1: was the love of his life. It's impossible to know.
Speaker 1: Maybe he never cared that much about any of them.
Speaker 2: I don't know if he's actually capable of love.
Speaker 1: That's a great question. In one of the reasons that,
Speaker 1: like Herman Gerring is one of the people who's like
Speaker 1: he was different after Gelly, Like a lot of people
Speaker 1: who wound up in trial after World War Two were
Speaker 1: the biggest proponent of the Hitler totally changed after his
Speaker 1: niece killed herself. And there's some suspicion among historians that like, well,
Speaker 1: you're just trying to like make it seem make yourself
Speaker 1: seem less complicit, and that like, no, when I got
Speaker 1: involved with this guy, he was a normal dude and
Speaker 1: then he went crazy, and I, you know it wasn't
Speaker 1: I I did, you know? It was out of my hands.
Speaker 2: Also, what a way to blame it on the woman.
Speaker 2: I mean, the the somersaults that people will pull to
Speaker 2: blame everything on a woman.
Speaker 1: It's amazing.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 1: And it comes down to like the ultimate example of
Speaker 1: that is not to throw a shade on Simon Wisenthal
Speaker 1: because he's a hero, but like the Hitler got syphilis
Speaker 1: from a Jewish prostitute, it's like both blame it on
Speaker 1: a Jewish person and on a woman.
Speaker 2: There we go, yeah, oh cool, that just a what
Speaker 2: a neat little bottle bow. We wrapped that up in
Speaker 2: He couldn't help it.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So this like the attitude that Hitler was just
Speaker 1: like sort of irredeemably weird and couldn't possibly have attracted
Speaker 1: a woman naturally, there was always strange. It's not only
Speaker 1: out of line with what, like Mimi Reader reported, it's
Speaker 1: out of line with what his friends who didn't go
Speaker 1: on trial for war crimes reported from this stage of
Speaker 1: his life. I found an interview in Time with a
Speaker 1: Carl Wilhelm Kraus, who worked as Hitler's valet for five
Speaker 1: years from thirty four to thirty nine. They were like
Speaker 1: friendly and here's what Kraus reported. Quote. What I can
Speaker 1: state here is that Hitler certainly did not hate women.
Speaker 1: Proof of this are the many actresses who were invited
Speaker 1: along during the early years to afternoon and evening performances.
Speaker 1: Often during our travels, he would suddenly be totally enchanted, exclaiming,
Speaker 1: My God, isn't that a beautiful girl? He then turned around,
Speaker 1: making me, who was behind him, moved to the side
Speaker 1: so that he had an unrestricted view behind him and
Speaker 1: could follow the lady with his gaze. If in any
Speaker 1: given place an exceptionally beautiful woman would catch his eye,
Speaker 1: Bruckner more often than not had to find out her address.
Speaker 1: After that, the lady was invited for coffee, either to
Speaker 1: Munich Berlin or the ober Saltzburg, just so Hitler could
Speaker 1: have a chat with her. That sounds like normal famous
Speaker 1: guy famous. That sounds like fucking any rich famous guy
Speaker 1: in la seeing a girl who thinks he's cute and
Speaker 1: having someone from his entourage go down there.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, that's classic.
Speaker 1: Sounds like normal famous dude behavior. Ye. John Tolan talked
Speaker 1: to Emil Maurice, Hitler's long time chauffeur, and uh, this
Speaker 1: is the guy who made love to Gelly and then
Speaker 1: got fired. But he and Hitler were close for a
Speaker 1: long time, and despite being exiled by Hitler for fucking
Speaker 1: his niece, Emil Maurice gave a pretty reasonable appraisal of
Speaker 1: his old boss's sex life, quote, we chased girls together
Speaker 1: and I used to follow him like a shadow. The
Speaker 1: two would spend time at the art academy and an
Speaker 1: artist's studios, admiring models posing in the nude. Calling himself
Speaker 1: heir Wolf, Hitler would occasionally pass an evening with Maurice
Speaker 1: roaming the night spots and streets for girls. Since the
Speaker 1: latter was attractive to women, he would act as a
Speaker 1: go between every so often. According to Maurice, Hitler would
Speaker 1: entertain one of these conquests by proxy in his little room.
Speaker 1: He always offered flowers, even when he was penniless, and
Speaker 1: we used to go out and admire the ballet dancers.
Speaker 1: Sounds again normal, No, that's yeah, it's all as his
Speaker 1: hot friend wingman.
Speaker 2: For him, Like, yeah, that's all standard.
Speaker 1: Yeah again, these are like that, and this is a
Speaker 1: guy you'd expect. Emil Maurice would have bad shit to
Speaker 1: say about Hitler, but like, there's nothing about that. I
Speaker 1: don't believe that's sounds like a million guys.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's nothing. Ultimately, there's nothing special about
Speaker 2: Hitler whatsoever. Like it's like there's.
Speaker 1: That's the conclusion you're drawn to. Now. The last destination
Speaker 1: on our tour to Hitler's love life is, of course,
Speaker 1: his relationship with Eva Brown or Braun. Eva was, as
Speaker 1: I stated, seventeen when they met. She had been educated
Speaker 1: in a convent like Mimi Reader and worked at Heinrich Hoffman,
Speaker 1: his photographer's shop. You know, she was working there when
Speaker 1: Hitler met her in nineteen twenty nine. Now, this is
Speaker 1: during the same year that Gelly and Hitler were supposedly
Speaker 1: in the midst of the greatest romance of his life.
Speaker 1: So they were living together in a relationship at this
Speaker 1: point when he meets and invites Eva Brown out to
Speaker 1: the opera, he probably started fucking her on the side
Speaker 1: while he was still with his niece, and then at
Speaker 1: one point fooling around with Mimi. So there's a point
Speaker 1: in time when Hitler's like fooling around with three ladies,
Speaker 1: one of whom lives with him. Yeah, and not telling
Speaker 1: any of them about this.
Speaker 2: I mean that's also standard standard rich guy. Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: standard rich Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: None of this is weird.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, you're in the like you're you're in the
Speaker 2: power that you've craved for so long, so you're going to.
Speaker 1: Like, you know, fuck a bunch of ladies.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: And like the the Eva Brown's two suicide attempts, one
Speaker 1: of them coincides with like when Mimi would have come over,
Speaker 1: and when like Gelly would have killed herself, and one
Speaker 1: of them coincides with another potential person that we think
Speaker 1: Hitler might have been fucking around with. So it's very
Speaker 1: possible that Eva Brown's early suicide attempts in thirty two
Speaker 1: and thirty five were because she was a teenager hooking
Speaker 1: up in an angry man in his forties who played
Speaker 1: mind games with her and fucked around on the.
Speaker 2: Sly Yeah no, I mean not all about that.
Speaker 1: Tracks tracks so much better than Sexual serial Killer. Yeah
Speaker 1: yeah yeah. Now, Eva Brown makes is someone who I'd
Speaker 1: never really had made sense to me as a historical
Speaker 1: character before, But she makes so much sense if you
Speaker 1: think of her as a sensitive, artistic young woman dating
Speaker 1: a really really abusive dude that she's in love with.
Speaker 1: Eric Kempa, another Hitler chauffeur, called her the unhappiest woman
Speaker 1: in Germany. I really like Eva Brown as portrayed by
Speaker 1: the offer Jane Tyne. Now. Jane is a romance writer,
Speaker 1: mostly romantic historic fiction from what I can tell, but
Speaker 1: she's also written some serious historic essays, and the one
Speaker 1: of hers that I read was pretty good. I like
Speaker 1: the way she presents Eva because, as a general rule,
Speaker 1: brilliant as they are, most of the great Hitler biographers
Speaker 1: are male and kind at getting into Ava Brown's head
Speaker 1: even a little bit. So I'm going to read a
Speaker 1: quote from Jane kind of describing Ava Brown a little
Speaker 1: differently than I'd heard her describe before. Quote from Eva's letters.
Speaker 1: We learned that her parents disapproved and that Hitler would
Speaker 1: frequently ignore her in public, merely passing her an envelope
Speaker 1: of money, until at the end of the evening, when
Speaker 1: she was finally allotted a room in the Berlin Chancellery.
Speaker 1: She was forced to use a back entrance in case
Speaker 1: anyone saw her. Hitler and his henchmen tried their hardest
Speaker 1: to keep Ava out of the spotlight and forbade any
Speaker 1: picture of her to be published, because they were keen
Speaker 1: to project the idea that he was married to Germany,
Speaker 1: yet Ava herself ensured the opposite for posterity. She was
Speaker 1: an early adopter of Senafilm and made endless home movies. Today,
Speaker 1: she would have been constantly on Facebook, instagramming her meals
Speaker 1: and taking selfies at the Berghoff. One of her more
Speaker 1: astonishing ambitions was to star one day in a biopic
Speaker 1: of her life with the man he always called Wolf.
Speaker 1: So yeah, she's yeah, sounds like a pretty normal teenager, Yeah,
Speaker 1: dating a famous guy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: I also like what Jane has to say about the
Speaker 1: Hitler is weird at sex myths because I think what
Speaker 1: she says rings true with an awful lot of the
Speaker 1: other research I've read quote it is impossible to peer
Speaker 1: behind the bedroom door. But suggestions that Hitler was sexually
Speaker 1: avoid because of his obsession with hygiene is contradicted by
Speaker 1: observers of the time, who suggest that Hitler and Ava
Speaker 1: did share a bed as a couple. They had interconnecting
Speaker 1: bedrooms at the Berghoff, and Hitler's ballet heinz Ling attests
Speaker 1: that they would go to bed together, while Hitler's maid
Speaker 1: Pauline Kohler wrote that Hitler is not strongly sexed Ava
Speaker 1: Brown's correspondence reveals nothing unusual, certainly not on the lines
Speaker 1: of fully clothed sex, except that once war had broken out,
Speaker 1: Hitler was unable to get interested. She used to show
Speaker 1: her friends a nineteen thirty eight photograph of Neville Chamberlain
Speaker 1: on a sofa in Hitler's Munich flat, saying, if only
Speaker 1: he knew what goings on that sofa has seen like
Speaker 1: we fucked on the sofa, and then the Prime Minister
Speaker 1: of England said on that ha ha, like a normal teenager.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1: So if you're still on the fence, if you're still
Speaker 1: on team Hitler was a kind of demonic sexual force
Speaker 1: rather than just a gross shitty dude who wound up
Speaker 1: in power through cunning and luck and the cowardice of
Speaker 1: arrogant men. Well, I'd like to read one more Hitler story, Okay,
Speaker 1: Mimi Reader came back to Hitler after their nineteen thirty
Speaker 1: one liaison. This was in nineteen thirty four, when Hitler
Speaker 1: was in power. Gilly had been dead for three years,
Speaker 1: her room had been turned into a shrine, and Hitler
Speaker 1: was unofficially with Ava Brown. Now Ava doesn't live with
Speaker 1: him at this point, because of course he's got to
Speaker 1: appear married to Germany. That old is that old ball
Speaker 1: and Germany. This gave der Feury the ability to invite
Speaker 1: Mimi in when she knocked on his door. I'm going
Speaker 1: to quote from explaining Hitler's write up of Mimi's recollections. Quote,
Speaker 1: once again, the relationship came to life. Once again. He
Speaker 1: asked her to stay with him as his lover. She
Speaker 1: insists she will not be part of an illicit relationship.
Speaker 1: She wanted to be married and to have children. Suddenly
Speaker 1: Hitler had a fit of rage. She shouted, why do
Speaker 1: you women only think of how having children? He kept shouting.
Speaker 1: It was around three am that he could not take
Speaker 1: care of a woman. He shouted that he had a
Speaker 1: big mission to fulfill. They argued for two more hours
Speaker 1: than they departed, never to see each other again.
Speaker 2: Whoo, yeah, dodged several bullets, Mimi.
Speaker 1: You really did. And yeah, it's also.
Speaker 2: So crazy because it's like, Okay, you're going after women
Speaker 2: that are raised in convents, motherfucker, Like the only purpose
Speaker 2: for sex in the Catholic Church is procreation. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: then you're mad at them, like you're taught all the
Speaker 2: same shit.
Speaker 1: Oh god, Yeah, I think what like maybe Hitler was
Speaker 1: in the poop and pee and maybe he liked sex
Speaker 1: with clothes on. Maybe not. At the end of the day,
Speaker 1: the overwhelming picture I'm left with of Hitler is that
Speaker 1: he was the same Like every woman has dated a
Speaker 1: shitty guy. Oh, just like Hitler. They just didn't wind
Speaker 1: up in charge of the country.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. He's like a selfish, fucking idiot dude that
Speaker 2: needs to go to therapy.
Speaker 1: He's selfish. He's famous, and he's gonna take as much
Speaker 1: advantage of that as he can.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: He's a habitual liar because he's fucking Hitler. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: he's emotionally abusive and he screams when he doesn't get
Speaker 1: his way. Yeah, Like yeah, he's a gaslighting piece of shit.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, he's a Yeah, Hitler turns out piece of shit.
Speaker 1: Hitler turns out piece of shit, but not like, of
Speaker 1: course he's a bad person, but he's not. Like what's
Speaker 1: scarier to me about this is that, like there's nothing
Speaker 1: special about him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's just classic piece of shit.
Speaker 1: It's just a normal piece of shit.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's nothing out of the ordinary.
Speaker 1: And that means like the good thing that means is
Speaker 1: that like we we as human beings, will never deal
Speaker 1: with supernatural evil settling down upon the world and forcing
Speaker 1: a nightmare regime on us. Yeah, but it also means
Speaker 1: that there's millions of guys like this walking around, who
Speaker 1: if they ever got into power. Yeah, this is that
Speaker 1: kind of potential.
Speaker 2: Oh exactly, this is the this is the blueprint for
Speaker 2: those kind of guys.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, and that's why when you look at the
Speaker 1: fucking evolution of in cell culture on the Internet, they're
Speaker 1: really in the Nazis, yeah they and they're really into
Speaker 1: Isis too. They love them both. No, yeah, they love
Speaker 1: the murder and the hatred and like the ability to
Speaker 1: do violence on like a world you feel is wrong
Speaker 1: to you. And yeah, they all have issues with women,
Speaker 1: and none of them fuck yeah, and.
Speaker 2: None of them like ask why a woman might not
Speaker 2: be into them immediately.
Speaker 1: They all have that reaction when like a buddy's like,
Speaker 1: maybe just learn to dance or whatever.
Speaker 2: You learn to dance to dance.
Speaker 1: That's the fucking hitler. I want people to like think
Speaker 1: about when they imagine what kind of man could do
Speaker 1: the things he did, The kind of guy whose friend
Speaker 1: is like, well, maybe learn to dance and that girl
Speaker 1: who likes dancing will be interested in you. And he
Speaker 1: just starts screaming, Yeah, like there's if I could improve.
Speaker 2: Yeah exactly, I'm already a perfect being.
Speaker 1: I am a perfect being me fourteen year old Horny
Speaker 1: Hitler is Oh god, yeah no, that's Hitler. Yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: fucking Hitler.
Speaker 2: He's the worst. I mean, but he's not, is.
Speaker 1: The thing exactly?
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's not. He's like he's perfectly average.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's He's a perfectly average, shitty person who wound
Speaker 1: up in a position of power and did the kind
Speaker 1: of things that like, comparing him to a serial killer
Speaker 1: is wrong. Comparing him to one of these in cel
Speaker 1: kids who goes on a mass shooting rampage or drives
Speaker 1: a van into a sorority house or whatever to kill.
Speaker 1: That's who to compare him to.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's much more accurate.
Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure. And he I think that that is
Speaker 1: one way to look at sort of the Holocaust, is
Speaker 1: that like it was a reaction of like anger at
Speaker 1: not winning this war and wanting to do as much
Speaker 1: damage as you could. And there's like an attitude of
Speaker 1: that about like the destruction of Berlin, that like the
Speaker 1: reason he didn't pull out of Berlin, or the reason
Speaker 1: he didn't surrender and just shoot himself that way and
Speaker 1: spare the city and people is he was like, no,
Speaker 1: if we're going to lose, all of us are going
Speaker 1: to die.
Speaker 2: Yeah, fuck Germany, taken everybody with me. You didn't play hard.
Speaker 1: Enough for me exactly. Like that was literally like some
Speaker 1: of the shit he was saying is that, like, if
Speaker 1: Germany doesn't win, we deserve to be destroyed. Like he's
Speaker 1: just a shitty, angry, little prick with a temper who
Speaker 1: you know if if I mean fuck it man like
Speaker 1: to get really dark on you. Maybe in a society
Speaker 1: where young men like that go on mass shooting sprees,
Speaker 1: they're less likely to become hitler. Like I don't know
Speaker 1: if that's like good or whatever, but like doesn't have
Speaker 1: that option and just becomes hitler. Like we're in dark
Speaker 1: territory here. But I do think he's that kind of guy. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well, and it's also like it's being raised to think
Speaker 2: that you were special and then having the having that lie. Yeah,
Speaker 2: because nobody's special.
Speaker 1: Nobody's special. There's a lot of people out there hndler.
Speaker 2: Well, and like that's That's the big thing about some
Speaker 2: of these in cel guys is like they're raised to
Speaker 2: think that they are like the princes of their own
Speaker 2: little kingdom.
Speaker 1: Lot of Mama's boys, a lot of Mama's boy Bruce
Speaker 1: V that pick up artists guy living in his mom's
Speaker 1: basement talking about how the Jews are behind everything, like
Speaker 1: it just keeps happening.
Speaker 2: Well, and then they're mad at they desperately need a woman,
Speaker 2: but they're mad at a woman because they think a
Speaker 2: woman sees them as weak, because they need them to
Speaker 2: feel special.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the idea that like a relationship would have given
Speaker 1: take and that you both have things to teach each other. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Like he doesn't want to be taught anything.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no, he just wants pure allegiance.
Speaker 1: Yeah, which is why he goes after sixteen year olds. Yeah,
Speaker 1: probably why his dad went after sixteen year olds. Absolutely repeatedly.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a power trip.
Speaker 1: It's a power trip.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you don't want an equal of any.
Speaker 1: Kind, no fucking ca that's terrifying.
Speaker 2: Yeah uh yeah yeah no, just a real piece shit.
Speaker 1: So if you've ever wondered what happens if you give
Speaker 1: one of those in cells on Reddit the most powerful
Speaker 1: military force in continental Europe. It was World War Two. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what happens.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, exactly, they'll just keep pushing.
Speaker 1: Boy Hattie Hitler.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so teach your sons to dance.
Speaker 1: Teach your sons to dance. And that's the only thing
Speaker 1: we've learned today. Yes, teach your sons to dance.
Speaker 2: You can dance if you want to.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Make make sure if you vote for someone, they
Speaker 1: don't date teenagers at the very least, at the very least,
Speaker 1: at the very least.
Speaker 2: I'm not dating teenagers.
Speaker 1: Because that's how you get Hitler's. Yeah, that's how you
Speaker 1: get Hitler's. Don't let them fuck their niece.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Can you make eye contact with a woman of your
Speaker 2: age without being filled with rage?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah? Are you Are you capable of, like having
Speaker 1: a conversation with a woman without screaming?
Speaker 2: Like, yeah exactly.
Speaker 1: So it's also are you capable of like seeing your
Speaker 1: dog misbehave without beating it and choking it and scaring
Speaker 1: a teenager?
Speaker 2: Yep?
Speaker 1: Pitler, God just.
Speaker 2: Kind of Metho's his German shepherd didn't finish the job early.
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, I mean it was a goat that supposedly
Speaker 1: bit off his dick.
Speaker 2: I wish that goat just.
Speaker 1: Hitler.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly chew that tin can up.
Speaker 1: How different the world would be if just had like
Speaker 1: a weird did you know that back in like the
Speaker 1: nineteen oh nine a goat ate a boy.
Speaker 2: What if like in the future, the only animals that
Speaker 2: can time travel or goats. So we did try to
Speaker 2: kill Hitler, Yeah, but he only bit his dick.
Speaker 1: The goat only just just got part of his dick.
Speaker 2: It was, Yeah, and we actually just really made it
Speaker 2: worse than it was in the first place.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it would have been fine. Otherwise he would have
Speaker 1: just went on to become a i don't know, like
Speaker 1: a like a sub and a dungeon.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I feel like that's the thing Hitler might have been
Speaker 1: happy with. Yeah, I've really gotten in touch with his demons.
Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure. He just wanted to be whipped. That's
Speaker 2: why he carried a whip with him everywhere.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, somebody whipped me. Admitting that takes some courage
Speaker 1: though it does.
Speaker 2: It does, I mean it still does in twenty nineteen.
Speaker 2: You know, like it's the more open people can be
Speaker 2: about the kings and stuff like that, and the more
Speaker 2: open sexually. The world can be more accepting than I
Speaker 2: think the less.
Speaker 1: That's why I say this every day. I say it
Speaker 1: a lot to my roommates, to police officers during traffic stops.
Speaker 1: More dominatrixes. Yeah, the only thing that will protect us
Speaker 1: from more Hitler's truly absolutely, that's I think the note.
Speaker 1: We're gonna end on, Brandy, We're gonna pluggables.
Speaker 2: Yeah. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram at
Speaker 2: brand Dazzle. My website is Brandyposey dot com Brandy with
Speaker 2: an Ie Posey with Ey. I have an album available
Speaker 2: wherever you listen to albums. It's called Opinion Cave. It's
Speaker 2: very funny. Feel free to buy it. And then I
Speaker 2: have a podcast called Lady to Lady to Me Barbara
Speaker 2: Gray and Test Barker, and then we have a fourth
Speaker 2: guest on every week. Past guests have included people like
Speaker 2: Karen co Gariff or French Stewart or Margaret Show. It's
Speaker 2: really really fun podcast. And then I have a monthly
Speaker 2: show here in Los Angeles on the second Saturday every
Speaker 2: month called Picture This. And that's a show that I've
Speaker 2: hosted for six years where we pair up comedians with animators.
Speaker 2: Well ive animate your jokes behind you during your set.
Speaker 2: It's like you riffing within your own bits. And we
Speaker 2: get like really insane artists to come do the show
Speaker 2: all the time. Look, we've had Pendleton Ward from Advent
Speaker 2: Your Time, Craig Bartlett, the creator of Hey Arnold has
Speaker 2: been on recently, and then we have people from amazing
Speaker 2: shows like Budgick, Horsemen and Big Mouth and mister Pickles,
Speaker 2: and it's it's a real, real great fun time. That's
Speaker 2: the second Saturday. And that's a music.
Speaker 1: It's my alarm that's set at four point thirty for
Speaker 1: no good reason. Oh boy, but yeah, those are my plugs.
Speaker 2: Come see me and all the shit. Guys.
Speaker 1: Well, if you if you currently know a young man
Speaker 1: who you're worried is going down a hitlerypath, yeah, tune
Speaker 1: him into those shows. Maybe you open up his mind
Speaker 1: a little bit. Listen to some progressive comedy, get him.
Speaker 2: Some dance lessons to listen to my podcast.
Speaker 1: Have a couple of men. I me, hear a couple
Speaker 1: of men laugh at themselves and you know, realize that
Speaker 1: it's okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like get him out there, just get him a hug.
Speaker 1: Or hire a goat to bite his dick off. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Either way, you know it's up to you to fight
Speaker 1: the Hitler's in your life. We all encounter a couple
Speaker 1: of hitlers out there.
Speaker 2: Hey, time traveling goats listening them out there and finish
Speaker 2: the jack. Next time, I.
Speaker 1: Finish the job and retroactively render this episode's pointless. I
Speaker 1: am Robert Evans. You can find us online at behind
Speaker 1: Themastards dot com. You can find me on Twitter at
Speaker 1: I write Okay. The book called A Brief History of
Speaker 1: Vice where I do drugs, which if Hitler had done
Speaker 1: more of when he was young and that when he
Speaker 1: was old, he might have also come to some better
Speaker 1: conclusions about because ego, I'm the podcast with the ad Bastard.
Speaker 1: Spot on Twitter and Instagram. Buy a T shirt Behind
Speaker 1: the Bastards tea public fuck Hitler, I Love forty percent
Speaker 1: of you.
Speaker 2: Behind the Bastards is a production of cool Zone Media.
Speaker 1: For more from cool Zone Media, visit our website Coolzonemedia
Speaker 1: dot com, or check us out on the iHeartRadio app,
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