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Speaker 1: Tg i F.

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Speaker 2: Hey, how's it going.

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Speaker 1: You used to watch TJF when you were a kid?

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Speaker 2: I mean, what wasn't that like? Was that that wasn't

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Speaker 2: a show?

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Speaker 1: It was like but it was like the Friday Nights.

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Speaker 1: Oh God, I wish I could remember the song. It's

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Speaker 1: like it's Friday Night everything. Wait, now everything's gonna be

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Speaker 1: all right?

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Speaker 2: Tg F Was that on like NVC?

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Speaker 1: I think so it was like maybe it was like

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Speaker 1: was the Cousy Show a part of that? That might

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Speaker 1: have been before? But there were four shows, I feel like,

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Speaker 1: and I got to watch like two of them and

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Speaker 1: I felt so cool.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I can't remember. I mean I remember it happening.

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Speaker 3: Oh here it is perfect Strangers Family, full House, full

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Speaker 3: House ABC.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, yeah, Friday Nights it was like big night

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Speaker 1: when you got to watch TJF. Like order pizza, have

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Speaker 1: a friend over for a sleepover. God, simple times, man.

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Speaker 3: I mean it was that was the thing about back then,

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Speaker 3: there weren't that many things to watch because we only

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Speaker 3: had so many channels watch the same thing.

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Speaker 1: I was talking recently with a friend about how much

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Speaker 1: money I'm just bleeding out because I have to subscribe

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Speaker 1: to every single like doing platform, Netflix, Showtime, HBO because

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Speaker 1: there's like one show on each platform that I want

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Speaker 1: to watch.

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Speaker 3: Yeahs, and they just keep getting more expensive. I had

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Speaker 3: a friend stay at my house to watch my dogs,

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Speaker 3: and he logged into his YouTube TV while he was here,

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Speaker 3: So I have live TV for free.

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Speaker 1: Now, Oh my god, I have another friend who does that. Yeah. See,

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Speaker 1: I have cable. Still you do you do.

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Speaker 2: You have green texts like I just have.

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Speaker 1: I think I mostly have it for footbookings. No, my

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Speaker 1: text are blue, Thank you very much.

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Speaker 2: I'll continue to text.

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Speaker 1: But I have cable and then I have like Netflix, HBO, Max, Amazon,

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Speaker 1: a typewriter WordPress.

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Speaker 3: I mean, isn't it funny that like cable seems passe

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Speaker 3: now like cable.

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Speaker 2: Like kids.

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Speaker 1: I didn't know that it was. So I don't know

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Speaker 1: what that word means, but I'm assuming that it means

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Speaker 1: like irrelevant of the past. Yeah, to me, it still

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Speaker 1: has a purpose, but apparently I'm.

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Speaker 3: Well, I mean, don't like, can't you get like ESPN streaming?

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Speaker 3: I'm sure you can just football packaging.

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Speaker 1: The thing is, what I need to do is sit

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Speaker 1: down and go through everything I'm subscribed to you each month,

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Speaker 1: because I know there are things that I'm not using

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Speaker 1: but I'm paying for and it's just that I never

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Speaker 1: take the time to actually sit down and go through it.

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Speaker 2: You know, I'm the same.

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Speaker 3: Should I even downloaded this app that was supposed to

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Speaker 3: like monitor like subscriptions that I had, and that charged

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Speaker 3: a subscription and I never used it. I was like,

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Speaker 3: why the fuck am I charted like this is such

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Speaker 3: a waste of money. I'm like paying ridiculous.

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Speaker 1: I know, I know, maybe that's the new thing. Maybe

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Speaker 1: I'll abandon my ways since we're on our topic of

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Speaker 1: abandon and make myself sit down and then abandon some

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Speaker 1: streaming platforms. I like what you did right there, Thank you,

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Speaker 1: thank you. I appreciate that well. Speaking of the word abandon,

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Speaker 1: it is the last Friday of the month, which is wild,

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Speaker 1: and we keep talking about how time is just flying by,

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Speaker 1: but it really is to me. Someone said to me

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Speaker 1: that football starts soon, like it starts actually this weekend,

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Speaker 1: which is shocking to me. But we're here, We're about

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Speaker 1: to be in fall. Can't wait for the weather, but

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Speaker 1: I hardly.

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Speaker 2: Doesn't feel like we're anywhere near fall.

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Speaker 1: It's like that is it's like one hundred degrees, but

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Speaker 1: we are wrapping up this month with the word this

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Speaker 1: month was abandoned, and so we always kind of circle

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Speaker 1: back talk a little bit about the podcast that we

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Speaker 1: had this month and also what we learned and how

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Speaker 1: we found ourselves living with abandon You want to go first?

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Speaker 1: Like the way you said it was so serious all

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Speaker 1: of a sudden, do you want to go first? Well, actually,

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Speaker 1: let's just touch a little bit on some of the

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Speaker 1: podcasts because we did have your friend Jackie Saint James

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Speaker 1: on the podcast Did you want to talk a little bit?

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Speaker 1: If you guys have not listened to that podcast, it

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Speaker 1: was wildly fascinating. I want to say one thing because

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Speaker 1: as I posted about this podcast on social media, Jackie

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Speaker 1: is a director of porn and so we had her on.

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Speaker 1: She kind of talked a little a little bit about

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Speaker 1: the industry, and I was thinking, I wonder if people

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Speaker 1: are like, why does she have, you know, like a

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Speaker 1: porn star, a porn director on, Like how is that

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Speaker 1: anywhere in the like realm of inner beauty? And here's

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Speaker 1: how I'm gonna tell you, so what I have found

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Speaker 1: or this is like you and I talk about just

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Speaker 1: being curious people and to me and I don't know

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Speaker 1: if you relate to this at all, Chip, But it's

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Speaker 1: like in life, the things that I just don't know

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Speaker 1: anything about, or I just assume that I have some knowledge,

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Speaker 1: you know, based on just like a broad view of

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Speaker 1: I e. Porn. Like let's just use this as an example. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: the porn industry. I actually know nothing about the industry,

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Speaker 1: and so what's been interesting to me is to learn

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Speaker 1: more about the industry. But Jackie really touched on this,

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Speaker 1: and I thought it was really fascinating. But she was like,

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Speaker 1: the biggest thing that I've learned working in this industry

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Speaker 1: is that there are some really good, kind hearted people

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Speaker 1: working in this industry, and it's a business like anything else. Correct,

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Speaker 1: But I think it's really easy from the outside for

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Speaker 1: us to assume that anyone tied to that industry, you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, we just have these like preconceived notions

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Speaker 1: about them. And we talked a little bit about that

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Speaker 1: when we had Candice Horribite and how pleasantly surprised we

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Speaker 1: were to be like, oh, yeah, we're really making some

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Speaker 1: judgments about situations and people that we just don't know

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Speaker 1: anything about. So what I like to do here on

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Speaker 1: this podcast is just it's kind of just like be

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Speaker 1: informative and be stay curious and learn more. And I

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Speaker 1: think it goes back to the fact that we're all

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Speaker 1: connected and somehow intertwined in this world. That's what I believe.

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Speaker 1: And so if we're kind of ostracizing certain people because

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Speaker 1: of a preconceived notion like we just mentioned, that just

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Speaker 1: doesn't feel fair.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, and I think it's important.

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Speaker 3: I mean, particularly with the conversation with Jackie, she spoke

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Speaker 3: a lot about ways that she was doing things differently

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Speaker 3: and some of their care and thought that she was

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Speaker 3: bringing to the format. And I think, like, look, porn's

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Speaker 3: never going to go away. Whether you watch it or

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Speaker 3: like it or not, it's never going away. So it

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Speaker 3: is good to know that there are people out there

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Speaker 3: that are approaching it with a little bit more care

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Speaker 3: for the people who are working with in it. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: you know, she said there's a lot of women that

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Speaker 3: are that are actresses and porn that are supporting their

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Speaker 3: family through doing it, Like it's a means to an

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Speaker 3: end for a lot of people. Just and like, think

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Speaker 3: about how many people you know work at a bank

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Speaker 3: and hate their job or right you have to drive

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Speaker 3: around all day in uber and like want to like

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Speaker 3: punch their hand through the windshield, but it's what they

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Speaker 3: do to get by and survive. So I think it's

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Speaker 3: really important that like we try and give people grace

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Speaker 3: and think about them as human beings and not them

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Speaker 3: as what they do.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, human beings, not human doings. You know that's something No,

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Speaker 1: but that's that's exactly what I was trying to say

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Speaker 1: as well. I think that's the whole point of us

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Speaker 1: doing anything like that. And it's just been interesting and

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Speaker 1: I think it's like we're not sitting here trying to

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Speaker 1: convince you porn as good or porn as bad. Again,

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Speaker 1: I say this every time that we have a conversation

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Speaker 1: about porn. Is I don't really know, Like I don't

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Speaker 1: have any answer, and I am still on my own

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Speaker 1: journey of you know, kind of coming to terms with that.

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Speaker 1: And it's definitely I've been in relationships that it's played

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Speaker 1: a really negative role, So I've seen the dark sides

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Speaker 1: of it. But I also agree with you, it's not

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Speaker 1: going anywhere. So I would like to have a bit

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Speaker 1: more understanding for my own self, Like that just helps

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Speaker 1: me to understand kind of what's behind it. It actually

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Speaker 1: helped me so much to talk to Jackie after we

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Speaker 1: talked to Candae and be like, again, this is literally

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Speaker 1: run just like the entertainment industries that we work in.

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Speaker 1: It kind of like just removed the veil, you know,

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Speaker 1: lifted the veil.

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Speaker 3: And it was like, oh, yeah, yeah, I don't know,

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Speaker 3: and specifically for this month, Like it was the reason

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Speaker 3: why I even suggested that we talk to Jackie was

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Speaker 3: because the way that we'd met in just a theater

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Speaker 3: program at like a reputable university, right, and for her

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Speaker 3: to say, I'm abandoned my dream of being an actress,

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Speaker 3: but I found a new avenue for myself in the

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Speaker 3: entertainment industry. And she's really driving, like yeah, a ton

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Speaker 3: of awards and she's still shape shifting, which I think

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Speaker 3: is important because it's you know, abandonment can be a

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Speaker 3: good thing, which we've tried to point out this month,

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Speaker 3: and it seems like every time she's abandoning what she's doing,

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Speaker 3: it's for something that's better for her.

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Speaker 1: Right, she's going into marriage and family therapy. I was like,

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Speaker 1: this is the most fascinating thing that being a porn

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Speaker 1: director really opened up her interest in psychology, Like I

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Speaker 1: completely get that too, because sex and psychology is so

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Speaker 1: tied together, yet nobody seems to talk about that, Like

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Speaker 1: maybe a sex therapist or expert talks about that, but

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Speaker 1: it's not really discussed amongst the people, like, you know,

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Speaker 1: it's not like we're sitting around with our friends being like, huh,

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Speaker 1: I wonder why that's your preference sexually, or like, you know,

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Speaker 1: just talking about even dating and relationships and how much

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Speaker 1: that is tied to psychology and the way that our

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Speaker 1: lives have gone or experienced as children and all that stuff.

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Speaker 1: I just find it all so fascinating and I really

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Speaker 1: want to keep having those conversations. So that's why we

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Speaker 1: had Jackie on. She is funny and well spoken as well,

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Speaker 1: as I really enjoyed talking to her. She was a

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Speaker 1: good one. We also talked about funny ways people quit jobs, because,

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Speaker 1: as you said, we were trying to make the point

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Speaker 1: to you guys of like, and this is something I've

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Speaker 1: learned or I'm still learning in my life, and I

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Speaker 1: think maybe it's something we kind of start to accept

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Speaker 1: a little more in our forties. But about saying no

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Speaker 1: first of all, but also knowing when to walk away

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Speaker 1: from things, you know, I've been like notorious for staying

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Speaker 1: too long in work situations, in relationships, whatever it is,

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Speaker 1: and something I've really kind of had to like accept

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Speaker 1: as I've gotten older. But it's very freeing too. Is

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Speaker 1: that knowing when to walk away and when to lay

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Speaker 1: something down is one of the most powerful tools any

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Speaker 1: of us can have. So you and I had talked

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Speaker 1: about funny ways people quit their jobs.

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Speaker 2: I've heard at it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, for a lighter spin. And then I had on

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Speaker 1: Laura Lee Bryant, who is a holistic chef and friend

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Speaker 1: of mine for a long time. She also has gone

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Speaker 1: through a divorce, her whole tired life change, so she's

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Speaker 1: kind of tying that into the way that she uses

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Speaker 1: food nowadays, and her new cookbook talks about heartache and

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Speaker 1: also using nutrition to kind of nourish her soul, which

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Speaker 1: I find really interesting. Ryan Hayden was on. She was

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Speaker 1: a repost that I had done. She was one of

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Speaker 1: the most I don't know, fascinating people. This woman was

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Speaker 1: married to Christian Slater, okay, and we didn't really talk

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Speaker 1: about that on the podcast because she was like, our

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Speaker 1: culture is so celebrity obsessed, Like I don't I want

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Speaker 1: to leave my past in the past, and she's really

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Speaker 1: like changed her life completely. She stopped drinking. She was

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Speaker 1: in that marriage in a very dysfunctional like alcoholism, love, addiction,

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Speaker 1: all the things. Now she lives a sober life and

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Speaker 1: she's just a beautiful human. So if you guys have

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Speaker 1: not listened to that podcast, I highly recommend it. I

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Speaker 1: feel so much parallel to her, but she's a little

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Speaker 1: further along. I would say. She's just such a spiritual

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Speaker 1: human and it's just so calming to even hear her talk.

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Speaker 1: And then last week I interviewed Monica Berg, who's an

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Speaker 1: author and fellow Louisianian. Actually, Chip and I know, you know,

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Speaker 1: I love that, but she really talked through how to

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Speaker 1: let go abandon of old narratives and just step into

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Speaker 1: your authentic power, which sounds so easy, but I think

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Speaker 1: is really such a process of all of us all

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Speaker 1: getting to know ourselves and learning how to apply that

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Speaker 1: into our lives. So she was a good one as well.

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Speaker 1: All right, Chip, did you want to tell the people

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Speaker 1: what you really like came to this month with the

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Speaker 1: word abandoned, Like, did you tie into anything that happened

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Speaker 1: in your life?

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Speaker 3: You know, it's I was trying to think of a

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Speaker 3: very like specific example. Yeah, and I don't think they're

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Speaker 3: I mean, aside from finally being like I'm taking a

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Speaker 3: vacation where I'm like telling everybody I'm off and I'm

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Speaker 3: not going to work.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it felt really nice.

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Speaker 3: But you know, I sort of reflected back on my life,

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Speaker 3: and you know, I am It's funny because I'm such

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Speaker 3: a dichotomy, Like I am a bit.

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Speaker 2: Of a rule follower, but I'm also like.

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Speaker 3: Not, you know, like if I'm in a situation where

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Speaker 3: I feel like I know we're going to get in trouble,

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Speaker 3: I like to follow the rules, but generally in my life,

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Speaker 3: I'm kind of like.

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Speaker 2: Everything's figure outable.

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Speaker 1: You know, like, yeah, you are free spirited.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm like free spirited in that way. And so

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Speaker 3: I look back and I'm like, I have kind of

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Speaker 3: lived my life and I do live my life with

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Speaker 3: some level of abandoned. Like I grew up in a

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Speaker 3: really small town. I went away to college. I never

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Speaker 3: went back. I mean, I go back to visit, but

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Speaker 3: like some people go back and live in their hometown

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Speaker 3: before they figure out what they're going to do for

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Speaker 3: the rest of their lives. Some people go back and

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Speaker 3: stay the rest of their lives. And I went directly

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Speaker 3: to New York, and then when I was over that,

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Speaker 3: I moved to Los Angeles, and when I was over that,

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Speaker 3: I moved to Nashville. I've been you know, I love

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Speaker 3: to travel, and you know, with this last trip, it

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Speaker 3: was the first time I ever did an all inclusive thing,

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Speaker 3: which you know has its benefits, and I wanted to

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Speaker 3: like see the difference, and I left thinking, I don't

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Speaker 3: think I ever want to do it again, because you

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Speaker 3: feel like you have to eat the.

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Speaker 2: Food that's at the hotel because it's already paid for.

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Speaker 3: And for me, I have that little bit of reckless

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Speaker 3: abandon where I'm like, I want to go into the

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Speaker 3: town square, like I want to see how the locals live.

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Speaker 3: It doesn't scare me where I think a lot of

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Speaker 3: people that don't try as much as we do, they

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Speaker 3: naturally there is a fear of what's foreign to them.

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Speaker 3: And so I experienced that a little bit on my trip,

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Speaker 3: where Mark wasn't as comfortable doing some of the things

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Speaker 3: that I wanted to do, and that I think just

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Speaker 3: comes with traveling more, you know, like totally, but yeah,

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Speaker 3: it's this just talking about all this stuff sort of

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Speaker 3: made me realize, like, I feel like I'm really happy

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Speaker 3: with my path, and you know, there really aren't any

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Speaker 3: things that I look back on and think like, oh,

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Speaker 3: well that got fucked up or I've had these major repercussions.

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Speaker 3: Because I lived with abandon, I think I can look

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Speaker 3: back at more things and be like, these are the

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Speaker 3: things that I've achieved because I've lived that way.

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Speaker 1: Isn't that a good feeling.

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Speaker 2: It's a great feeling.

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Speaker 1: Like when you can look back at your life and

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Speaker 1: you're like not even really fully aware of how you were,

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Speaker 1: but then you're very appreciative of the way fired even

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Speaker 1: and just kind of like appreciating yourself. I think that

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Speaker 1: is in your journey, Like that's that's us a good

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Speaker 1: fealing hard.

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Speaker 3: It doesn't mean that I don't like worry and have

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Speaker 3: anything for anything, because I do, right, And it's surprising

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Speaker 3: because I feel like I'm more aware of that stuff.

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Speaker 3: So when I'm able to reflect, I'm like, wait a minute,

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Speaker 3: where did that? How did that creep in?

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Speaker 2: Like that's not me?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And so it's I think it's nice to remind

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Speaker 3: yourself that, like you aren't your fears that.

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Speaker 1: Is a big one. Yeah, fears are kind of just

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's interesting though, because I think I can't

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Speaker 1: remember which podcast I said this one, but someone told

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Speaker 1: me one time there are just really two emotions in life,

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Speaker 1: and one is love and one is fear. Are you

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Speaker 1: leading with love? Are you leading with fear? And it's like,

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Speaker 1: it's just very true.

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Speaker 3: To me.

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Speaker 1: That was so eye opening because anytime you're leading with love,

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Speaker 1: and that's to me, that includes happiness and joy and

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Speaker 1: service and surrender and all of those things, life is

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Speaker 1: actually just so much more peaceful. And anytime we're leading

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Speaker 1: with fear, it's when you know, for me, it's like

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to grip to control or like doing things

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Speaker 1: based on past experiences not the present moment, and it's

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Speaker 1: just not ever pleasant. So to be able to look

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Speaker 1: back at your life and go, well, I really kind

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Speaker 1: of lived. I think that is such a good thing. Yeah, yeah, awesome.

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Speaker 1: How about you, I would say mine. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: think at the beginning of the month, I talked a

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Speaker 1: little bit about the somatic therapy that I was going

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Speaker 1: to start doing, and let me tell you, guys, it

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Speaker 1: is rocking me. It's wild. It's just like you know,

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Speaker 1: I've done a lot of work, I would say, and

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Speaker 1: a lot of therapy and twelve step work and just

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Speaker 1: really kind of you know, looking at patterns and I

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Speaker 1: don't know, that's just self awareness is really important to me,

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Speaker 1: so I'll work at it. It's really like I want

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Speaker 1: to keep growing and evolving as I get older, and

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Speaker 1: I always have been that way. So it's interesting because

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Speaker 1: as a person who you know, I feel like I'm

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Speaker 1: such a feeler. I would not think that I would

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Speaker 1: be a person that's repressing things, like you know, I

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Speaker 1: don't know, you know me, Like, is that something you

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Speaker 1: would I feel like I'm such like I talk about everything.

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Speaker 1: I'm even on this podcast, like but with all my friends,

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Speaker 1: I am just telling what's happening all the time, or

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Speaker 1: with my therapist or whatever it is. And so the

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Speaker 1: fact that I am reaching some things that I've just

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Speaker 1: kind of like stuffed down is fascinating. But they're not

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Speaker 1: really like tied together. She was like, this is therapy

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Speaker 1: for your nervous system, not for your mind. And I

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Speaker 1: think I've done a lot of work to understand things

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Speaker 1: or why I do things, or why things happened, or

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Speaker 1: why people in my life have done what they've done,

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Speaker 1: you know, but that's all mind driven, and so it's

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Speaker 1: like having the information, but like your body and your

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Speaker 1: nervous system doesn't exactly release trauma because of that, so

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Speaker 1: it doesn't as much I could understand why the situations happened.

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Speaker 1: I'm not really over them because my body is still

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Speaker 1: reacting as if they may happen again, or you know,

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Speaker 1: I go into a certain situation. I mentioned to you guys,

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Speaker 1: like how much of a struggle posting on Instagram has

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Speaker 1: been for me, and it's like it still could send

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Speaker 1: me into a full panic attack, you know, just from

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Speaker 1: like feeling too vulnerable. But that's because my body is

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Speaker 1: registering it to a time when I was getting so

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Speaker 1: much hate and death threats and all that stuff. And

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Speaker 1: so anyway, it's just been really fascinating it. It's like

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Speaker 1: my last session, I literally almost puked. I sobbed the

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Speaker 1: whole time. I got a headache after, and I know

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Speaker 1: that was not really going to like encourage people to

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Speaker 1: go do that, but I always do believe this statement

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Speaker 1: of the only way out is through, and so I'm

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Speaker 1: willing to like suck it up and keep doing it,

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Speaker 1: even though I don't like love the way it makes

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Speaker 1: me feel. I do feel like a release after, you know,

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Speaker 1: and I feel like I'm actually kind of digging some

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Speaker 1: things up that ultimately will help me continue on my evolution,

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Speaker 1: you know, and just continue to have like a growing

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00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:12,879
Speaker 1: journey versus just like stifling and feeling stuck. And I

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00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:17,680
Speaker 1: keep mentioning that, like I've just felt stuck. So yeah, anyway,

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Speaker 1: I'm doing it. It's hard. It is like definitely rocking me.

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Speaker 1: It's draining. But my way of living with abandon is

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Speaker 1: to just keep stepping into the unknown. And to me,

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Speaker 1: that's what this is my word this year if you

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Speaker 1: remember too, was dare and so like, I'm just going

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Speaker 1: to keep like challenging myself to keep going even when

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Speaker 1: I want to quit. Yeah, but just so that like

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Speaker 1: on the other side, it's just better. It always is

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Speaker 1: better on the other side, you know.

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Speaker 2: What what was like, what is the process of that?

399
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Speaker 2: Like is it talk therapy or is it physical?

400
00:20:54,200 --> 00:20:57,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's kind of both. So, I mean my therapist

401
00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:00,280
Speaker 1: is in California. Her name is actually Ali k and

402
00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:04,000
Speaker 1: she was on this podcast a couple months ago. So

403
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Speaker 1: if you guys are interested in somatic therapy, go check

404
00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,840
Speaker 1: out the podcast I did with her. She was great,

405
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Speaker 1: and talking with her really just kind of put her

406
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Speaker 1: on my radar because she's also a coach, and so

407
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:18,400
Speaker 1: like she talks to you in between sessions and you're

408
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:22,160
Speaker 1: kind of able to navigate just some like as things

409
00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:24,359
Speaker 1: come up in life while you're doing this kind of therapy,

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00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:27,919
Speaker 1: she helps you navigate it. So Allie Kate, she's in

411
00:21:28,119 --> 00:21:31,919
Speaker 1: LA and we do everything over zoom. So basically what

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00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:34,359
Speaker 1: will happen is she'll just start asking me questions about

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Speaker 1: the certain situations that I'm wanting to work on or

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Speaker 1: things that have come up in life from our last session.

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Speaker 1: And it's interesting because it'll be like I'm telling a

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Speaker 1: story and I'm moving my hand a certain way, like

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Speaker 1: what I'm doing to you right now, Chip, Like it's

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00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:50,600
Speaker 1: it's small emotions, you know, like it's just like moving

419
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Speaker 1: my finger and kind of pointing. But especially if you're angry,

420
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:57,200
Speaker 1: you don't really realize like you're doing something. Or when

421
00:21:57,200 --> 00:21:59,440
Speaker 1: I was first telling her a story about what happened

422
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Speaker 1: to me on Reality, I kept grabbing my neck. I

423
00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:05,880
Speaker 1: really never noticed that, Okay, like I would have never

424
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Speaker 1: known she's watching my movements and so she'll get to

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Speaker 1: she'll get to a place where she go, okay, I'll

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00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:14,679
Speaker 1: stop the story there, and she'd be like, do you

427
00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:17,919
Speaker 1: realize that you're like touching your neck a lot? And

428
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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, I didn't until you just said that.

429
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Speaker 1: She's like, well, you've obviously, Like She's like to me,

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00:22:22,840 --> 00:22:25,040
Speaker 1: that just means something is trapped in there, like you're

431
00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:29,160
Speaker 1: ready to speak it out. You're ready to like talk

432
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Speaker 1: it out to get it out of your body, and

433
00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:34,520
Speaker 1: your body is actually like you're rubbing your neck to

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Speaker 1: physically show you that, but like it's ready to be released,

435
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 1: but it's trapped and so like so anyway, she'll make

436
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:44,240
Speaker 1: me continue to do the motion, and every single time

437
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:47,600
Speaker 1: my reaction is like I'll just start sobbing. It's crazy

438
00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:51,840
Speaker 1: because you're like, why am I crying or wid Yeah,

439
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:53,840
Speaker 1: it's like I say one sentence and all of a sudden,

440
00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:56,080
Speaker 1: she makes me continue to do this move and I'm

441
00:22:56,119 --> 00:22:59,760
Speaker 1: like sobbing or wanting to throw up, or like last time,

442
00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:02,560
Speaker 1: I kind of got in like a panicky place and

443
00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:04,359
Speaker 1: I couldn't like open my eyes and look at her.

444
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:08,160
Speaker 1: It was wild. So anyway, it just our body really

445
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:10,760
Speaker 1: does keep the score and even if you're doing the

446
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:14,000
Speaker 1: talk therapy or doing you know, that kind of work.

447
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:16,000
Speaker 1: And I'm not knocking that kind of work at all,

448
00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:17,919
Speaker 1: Like I don't think that I could do this if

449
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:20,560
Speaker 1: I hadn't done that first, I guess, but I think

450
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:24,240
Speaker 1: everyone's process is different. But if you're feeling stuck, you're

451
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 1: feeling like unmotivated, depressed, anxious, it's probably because something is

452
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:33,000
Speaker 1: trapped in your body. And so yeah, I've just really

453
00:23:33,040 --> 00:23:36,280
Speaker 1: tried to pay more attention to that this last year

454
00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:38,040
Speaker 1: and a half because I think that's also where a

455
00:23:38,080 --> 00:23:40,560
Speaker 1: lot of our disease comes from, you know, like cancer

456
00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:44,160
Speaker 1: they say, or like autoimmune is trapped emotions a lot

457
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,000
Speaker 1: of times, like we just try to pretend like they're

458
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:51,800
Speaker 1: not all connected, and it really really is. So yeah,

459
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:55,760
Speaker 1: it's crazy, Like I literally I can't say enough about it.

460
00:23:55,760 --> 00:24:00,280
Speaker 1: It's been shocking but also really helpful. Like I will say,

461
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:04,639
Speaker 1: she has me. We've been doing certain exercises too, with

462
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:07,560
Speaker 1: like I set up a schedule so I'm posting twice

463
00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:09,720
Speaker 1: a week. Sounds like not a big deal, it's a

464
00:24:09,720 --> 00:24:12,800
Speaker 1: fucking big deal for me, Like it's just it, but

465
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:15,640
Speaker 1: it's like I'm getting it's getting a lot easier the

466
00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:19,720
Speaker 1: more I keep walking through it. And I actually recently

467
00:24:19,920 --> 00:24:22,720
Speaker 1: recorded a podcast that I'll tell you guys about when

468
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:25,800
Speaker 1: it comes out in October, but just talking a little

469
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:28,240
Speaker 1: bit about my story and parts that I've never told

470
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:32,840
Speaker 1: and yeah, so it's helping me to find my voice again.

471
00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:36,159
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say I'm like, you know, it's just a journey,

472
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:39,040
Speaker 1: it's a process. Whatever. I always want to be like

473
00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:41,480
Speaker 1: I'm just fixed now, and that's just not how it works.

474
00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:43,720
Speaker 1: But I do feel like I'm finding some freedom from it,

475
00:24:44,560 --> 00:24:48,240
Speaker 1: and I'm going to keep going even though, like I

476
00:24:48,280 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 1: want to cancel my appointment tomorrow because I don't want

477
00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:53,399
Speaker 1: to cry, but you know, some I just gotta fucking

478
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 1: do it. So anyway, that was the way that I

479
00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:01,240
Speaker 1: am abandoning the past and can continuing to move forward.

480
00:25:01,440 --> 00:25:03,960
Speaker 1: So I'm glad to hear that you had a good

481
00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:07,480
Speaker 1: like reflection. I feel like that was really yeah, yeah,

482
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:12,240
Speaker 1: really great, Okay, cool. Well, and I are both so

483
00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:14,160
Speaker 1: tired today, you.

484
00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:15,960
Speaker 3: Know, I don't know what it like. I'm like, I

485
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:17,399
Speaker 3: feel like I might need to go to the doctor.

486
00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:21,439
Speaker 3: I'm just so tired all the time. My mom my

487
00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:24,520
Speaker 3: mom was like, oh, you just don't bounce back like

488
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:27,800
Speaker 3: you used to. All that is I'm hearing fifty you know,

489
00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:30,800
Speaker 3: I just got back. You know, it's funny like our

490
00:25:31,119 --> 00:25:35,359
Speaker 3: vacation was pretty relaxing in the sense that like we

491
00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:38,080
Speaker 3: didn't do a whole lot, but we did drink a.

492
00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:39,879
Speaker 1: Lot, So that'll do it.

493
00:25:42,359 --> 00:25:44,800
Speaker 2: That I think is a little harder to bounce back from.

494
00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:46,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, sure is.

495
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:51,320
Speaker 3: Well, I came home from work yesterday and like, fed

496
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:53,439
Speaker 3: my dog. I'm also dog sitting a friend's dog and

497
00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:56,880
Speaker 3: fed them and I laid on my bed to wait

498
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:59,440
Speaker 3: for them to be done and woke up two hours later.

499
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:03,960
Speaker 1: My god, we my have COVID? Is what this sounds like?

500
00:26:04,119 --> 00:26:06,680
Speaker 2: So I hope not. I mean I feel fine. So yeah,

501
00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:09,840
Speaker 2: I did travel, so right, it.

502
00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:13,760
Speaker 1: Might be time to go to the dock there. But anyway,

503
00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:15,679
Speaker 1: we always love to hear from you guys, so email

504
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:18,040
Speaker 1: us at the Edge at velvet edge dot com. You

505
00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:20,960
Speaker 1: can also hit me up on Instagram. I am at Velvet.

506
00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:25,480
Speaker 2: Edge, Chip, I'm at Chip Doors. It's ch d O

507
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:26,760
Speaker 2: R S CH.

508
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 1: And as you guys go into the weekend, this almost

509
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:33,720
Speaker 1: holiday weekend, right, oh no, I'm a week ahead. I'm

510
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:36,639
Speaker 1: just like daydreaming about holidays already. As you guys, go

511
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:39,159
Speaker 1: into this weekend and you're living on the edge, I

512
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,840
Speaker 1: hope you always remember too ab casual.

513
00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:44,840
Speaker 2: Bye bye