WEBVTT - "The LESBIAN Expert" with Robin Cloud 0:00:07.720 --> 0:00:12.000 Hello, Hi guys, Good morning, afternoon or evening. 0:00:12.520 --> 0:00:17.840 This is the Unofficial Expert podcast with Sydney and Marie. 0:00:19.239 --> 0:00:21.480 You know, so this is a podcast where everybody thinks 0:00:21.480 --> 0:00:25.840 they're an expert at something ridiculous or informative, and we 0:00:26.000 --> 0:00:28.360 just pretty much picked their brains and find out if 0:00:28.400 --> 0:00:32.320 they're really the expert at whatever they're talking about. Marie, 0:00:32.320 --> 0:00:33.920 were you were an expert in this week? 0:00:35.560 --> 0:00:36.200 This week? 0:00:36.280 --> 0:00:40.879 I was an expert at looking a mess in public? 0:00:42.320 --> 0:00:45.960 What I almost fell several times, but you know, my 0:00:46.120 --> 0:00:49.240 core is I've been working on it, so my core 0:00:49.280 --> 0:00:52.520 strength is pretty good. And then after I almost bust 0:00:52.560 --> 0:00:57.600 my ass on the subway platform and almost died, I 0:00:57.640 --> 0:01:02.160 went home and saved everybody my apartment building's life. What 0:01:02.160 --> 0:01:05.120 that means is I snow gas and everyone in my 0:01:05.160 --> 0:01:09.039 apartment would sleep, but I was like, something is happening 0:01:09.120 --> 0:01:10.960 in here. My roommate went to sleep and let the 0:01:10.959 --> 0:01:11.440 stove on. 0:01:12.080 --> 0:01:15.240 Oh your roommate white, that's crazy. 0:01:14.920 --> 0:01:17.679 She's crazy, because you know how gone of lighting a candle, 0:01:17.800 --> 0:01:19.920 I could have blown the whole building up. 0:01:20.440 --> 0:01:22.480 And then it would just be the Unofficial Expert with 0:01:22.600 --> 0:01:24.039 Sydney Washington, and. 0:01:24.040 --> 0:01:26.800 It would just be the unofficial with Sydney Washington. 0:01:27.600 --> 0:01:28.399 Isn't that crazy? 0:01:28.640 --> 0:01:32.400 That's terrible. You need to get one of those those 0:01:32.720 --> 0:01:35.039 carbon monoxide alarms or whatever. 0:01:35.200 --> 0:01:36.120 I feel like I have one. 0:01:36.120 --> 0:01:38.120 I got to get like a canary or a bird 0:01:38.240 --> 0:01:39.080 or something. 0:01:38.880 --> 0:01:41.720 Or maybe you need to put batteries in it. There's 0:01:41.800 --> 0:01:44.959 not enough batteries there, just only have like one. 0:01:44.920 --> 0:01:47.360 The supposed only have one really or two. 0:01:47.760 --> 0:01:49.720 I don't even know what the want to have a 0:01:49.720 --> 0:01:51.600 carbon monoxide detector. 0:01:51.840 --> 0:01:54.960 Listen, we don't know you know where my building is. 0:01:55.200 --> 0:01:59.160 They don't have nothing. Our door barely works. 0:01:59.440 --> 0:02:00.720 I don't even know you had a doorbell. 0:02:02.560 --> 0:02:06.320 Yeah, it doesn't really work. Yeah, I you know, I 0:02:06.440 --> 0:02:09.560 have burned my apartment down when I was a kid. 0:02:09.639 --> 0:02:11.280 So and they let you stay there? 0:02:11.440 --> 0:02:13.720 No, they didn't. They're like, you gotta go back to 0:02:13.760 --> 0:02:15.640 New York. Oh was that why you got kicked out 0:02:16.160 --> 0:02:17.360 of Oakland, California? 0:02:17.440 --> 0:02:17.720 Yes? 0:02:18.480 --> 0:02:20.040 Really, yeah that's what happened. 0:02:20.680 --> 0:02:21.360 Wow. 0:02:21.680 --> 0:02:25.680 Yeah, I started a fire, burned half my apartment down, 0:02:26.320 --> 0:02:28.839 and then my cousin right after the fires, he said, 0:02:28.880 --> 0:02:29.200 you know you. 0:02:29.120 --> 0:02:29.960 Didn't fucked up now? 0:02:30.240 --> 0:02:33.440 Yeah, And they wouldn't let me buy stoves or matches 0:02:33.720 --> 0:02:36.480 or I couldn't. I had to be supervised twenty four hours. 0:02:37.240 --> 0:02:37.360 Yo. 0:02:37.440 --> 0:02:38.200 That is wow. 0:02:38.320 --> 0:02:40.200 For a couple of years too. And you know, black 0:02:40.200 --> 0:02:42.799 people will never let you like as soon as they 0:02:43.080 --> 0:02:45.840 would let imagine like, oh hope Sydney's not around, Like 0:02:45.960 --> 0:02:47.960 while I was around, I'm like, okay, I got it. 0:02:48.080 --> 0:02:49.840 Yeah, black people don't let you forget stuff. 0:02:49.880 --> 0:02:52.160 I was like, eleven, it was an accident. 0:02:52.919 --> 0:02:53.880 Why were you playing with fire? 0:02:53.919 --> 0:02:55.399 I mean I played a fire too, but I never 0:02:55.680 --> 0:02:56.720 burned anything down. 0:02:57.160 --> 0:02:59.600 Well that's because your mother's not a hoarder like my 0:02:59.639 --> 0:03:01.960 aunt was order and there was like newspapers and it 0:03:02.040 --> 0:03:03.040 was an accident, like. 0:03:03.600 --> 0:03:06.040 You lit the match and then you were watching it burn, yes, 0:03:06.080 --> 0:03:07.440 and then it got too close to your fingers and 0:03:07.440 --> 0:03:09.000 you were like ooh, and you dropped it on a 0:03:09.040 --> 0:03:11.679 stack of what jet magazines. 0:03:12.919 --> 0:03:16.480 I I was playing with like a fake cigarette and 0:03:16.520 --> 0:03:19.880 the cigarette was plastic, and I lit the plastic cigarette 0:03:19.919 --> 0:03:22.600 and it melted and it melted into a bag of 0:03:22.680 --> 0:03:26.880 like newspapers from nineteen eighty seven. Wow that my mom 0:03:27.000 --> 0:03:29.840 was just having because they had some coupons and whatnot. 0:03:30.000 --> 0:03:31.880 Well, you never know, a lot of places still take 0:03:31.919 --> 0:03:34.800 them expired coupon exactly. Shout out to Bed, Bath and Beyond. 0:03:35.440 --> 0:03:37.640 I don't care how expire those coupons are. They will 0:03:37.680 --> 0:03:41.720 take that twenty percent off for you. Sidney, What were 0:03:41.720 --> 0:03:42.960 you an expert in this week? 0:03:44.200 --> 0:03:50.120 I was an expert in saying no. I said no 0:03:50.240 --> 0:03:52.760 A lot. People asked me to pick up ships. I 0:03:52.800 --> 0:03:55.040 was like, no, people asked me to do stuff. I 0:03:55.080 --> 0:03:56.160 was like, no, this. 0:03:56.200 --> 0:03:56.840 Is my week. 0:03:56.960 --> 0:03:57.800 I do what I want. 0:03:58.400 --> 0:03:59.000 Oh. 0:03:59.160 --> 0:04:00.520 Yeah, I've been trying to say no more. 0:04:00.880 --> 0:04:02.760 I feel like, yes, you have been resisting me a 0:04:02.800 --> 0:04:05.520 little bit more. Don't think that I like it. I 0:04:05.600 --> 0:04:08.440 was like, who is this new nigga? 0:04:08.800 --> 0:04:10.960 I never say no to you? So you say no 0:04:11.040 --> 0:04:11.240 to me. 0:04:11.400 --> 0:04:12.840 You've been saying no to me about stuff? 0:04:12.880 --> 0:04:14.040 I feel like, what did I say no? 0:04:14.200 --> 0:04:15.760 I can't think all the top of my head right 0:04:15.800 --> 0:04:16.440 now exactly. 0:04:16.480 --> 0:04:20.560 I've been saying no to not my girlfriend gotta say 0:04:20.760 --> 0:04:21.360 yes to her. 0:04:22.240 --> 0:04:24.320 I feel like you've been hitting her with anot no, 0:04:24.440 --> 0:04:25.640 but the maybe later. 0:04:25.839 --> 0:04:28.960 I still haven't paid December's rent, so I say yes. 0:04:28.800 --> 0:04:33.440 It is February, second week of February. You haven't paid yet. 0:04:33.760 --> 0:04:36.599 And I'm still doing like installment plans. You know, I'm 0:04:36.600 --> 0:04:38.280 doing payment plans I'm doing. 0:04:38.160 --> 0:04:41.200 Like, do y'all split the rent in half? What you 0:04:41.240 --> 0:04:44.080 say half? What do you mean? I mean divided by two, 0:04:44.480 --> 0:04:45.560 like fifty fifty. 0:04:45.680 --> 0:04:49.120 See, I work on like a lesbian calculator, so half 0:04:49.279 --> 0:04:50.640 actually means like a quarter. 0:04:50.920 --> 0:04:54.599 So wow, Okay, Well, I'm gonna find out more about 0:04:54.640 --> 0:04:58.560 this lesbian calculator because I'm curious because I feel like 0:04:58.560 --> 0:04:59.960 I've been doing lesbian math my whole. 0:05:00.960 --> 0:05:03.440 Okay, let's be in math for you? Is zero zero 0:05:03.520 --> 0:05:04.839 zero zero? You pay nothing? 0:05:05.000 --> 0:05:05.480 Absolutely? 0:05:05.520 --> 0:05:06.599 You don't believe in half? 0:05:07.680 --> 0:05:07.880 Is that? 0:05:08.080 --> 0:05:08.400 I'm sorry? 0:05:08.440 --> 0:05:09.200 That's Haitian math. 0:05:09.360 --> 0:05:14.040 Yes, believe in contributing at all? 0:05:14.279 --> 0:05:17.200 Well, what are you talking about? My presence is the contribution? 0:05:17.600 --> 0:05:20.239 Yeah, for the kids, but that's not enough for the rent? 0:05:20.400 --> 0:05:25.240 Okay, my presence No, I'd be like, well she's here, 0:05:25.480 --> 0:05:27.320 so I'm like, y'all. 0:05:27.360 --> 0:05:29.560 Oh, the landlord comes to physically pick up the rent. 0:05:29.839 --> 0:05:30.560 Where do y'all live? 0:05:30.680 --> 0:05:35.839 Nineteen sixty two? Is there a milkman that passes by 0:05:35.920 --> 0:05:37.240 and drops off milk. 0:05:37.040 --> 0:05:39.320 To I have no idea how the rent is handled. 0:05:39.360 --> 0:05:41.640 All I know is that a Venmo will Actually she 0:05:41.760 --> 0:05:45.200 sends a request for the Venmo payment, and then I 0:05:45.320 --> 0:05:47.920 pay her well, I decline it, and then I sent 0:05:49.360 --> 0:05:52.120 the price that I think is okay for me at 0:05:52.120 --> 0:05:55.400 the moment. And then she texted me and she's like, did. 0:05:55.240 --> 0:05:57.000 You get my Venmo? And be like, oh my god, 0:05:57.279 --> 0:05:59.719 I think I deleted the app. You're so stupid. 0:06:00.400 --> 0:06:03.479 Here's a stupid I love you, Adrian. Speaking of loving Adrian. 0:06:03.520 --> 0:06:06.000 Who is a woman with a man's name. We can 0:06:06.080 --> 0:06:10.240 have a woman with a woman with a bird's name. Okay, right, 0:06:10.320 --> 0:06:15.240 it's a bird with a bird's name today as ours 0:06:15.240 --> 0:06:18.720 as our expert. She's a writer, a director, a comedian. 0:06:18.760 --> 0:06:21.360 She's done our show before and she killed. Yes she did, 0:06:21.600 --> 0:06:23.680 and we don't say that about everybody who does the show. 0:06:24.400 --> 0:06:28.560 Truly killed. Uh and she is our lesbian expert today. 0:06:28.600 --> 0:06:31.320 Give it up for Robin Rashida Cloud. 0:06:31.440 --> 0:06:36.120 Oh my god. Wow, See Marie is disrespectful. 0:06:37.200 --> 0:06:37.400 RC. 0:06:38.080 --> 0:06:39.360 I'm proud of the RC. 0:06:40.200 --> 0:06:45.279 She's so disrespectful, putting out the middle name, the whole government, 0:06:45.480 --> 0:06:48.039 the whole government name. Now I can like literally take 0:06:48.040 --> 0:06:51.080 all your information. All I need is your social Rashida. 0:06:51.440 --> 0:06:53.640 People don't even think Cloud is my last name, so 0:06:53.720 --> 0:06:55.440 I don't believe it. I was like, that's a stage 0:06:55.560 --> 0:06:58.720 last name. It's something that it's really real. 0:06:58.800 --> 0:07:05.160 Hey, Robin, it's so early to be and you look stunning. 0:07:05.520 --> 0:07:06.040 Thank you. 0:07:06.400 --> 0:07:08.479 I can tell you have like I cream in your life. 0:07:08.560 --> 0:07:09.880 You got a good moisturizer. 0:07:10.040 --> 0:07:13.040 Girl. I washed my face and then slathering myself with 0:07:13.120 --> 0:07:20.480 coconut oil. That's like I smell like a cupcake. Well, 0:07:20.920 --> 0:07:24.239 let me get my lesbian ass away from you. Why 0:07:24.280 --> 0:07:28.440 are you here? You don't work? Because we we know 0:07:28.480 --> 0:07:31.520 what I, me and city are here. We work? 0:07:31.800 --> 0:07:35.760 Why Marie, Marie Samuel Foston has no friends? 0:07:35.440 --> 0:07:41.320 Well, yes, Robin, what do you do during the day? 0:07:41.840 --> 0:07:45.240 A lot of people wonder that. So I right now, 0:07:45.280 --> 0:07:49.160 I'm running my own production company, and so I'm at 0:07:49.160 --> 0:07:55.920 home working on two documentaries and uh writing some scripts. Okay, 0:07:56.080 --> 0:07:59.720 And that sounds like a lot of estate on the side. 0:08:00.000 --> 0:08:01.400 You slinging real estate on the side. 0:08:01.880 --> 0:08:04.360 So what's your tax return looking like? 0:08:04.880 --> 0:08:07.880 What the what it looked like? You know, there are 0:08:07.920 --> 0:08:09.960 a couple there are a couple of ten ninety nine. 0:08:10.080 --> 0:08:13.360 Okay, so we get money back. Great, we'll see you're 0:08:13.360 --> 0:08:14.440 gonna get the money back. 0:08:15.080 --> 0:08:17.920 What's the limit, because it's just a quick sidebar, what's 0:08:17.960 --> 0:08:18.440 the limit? 0:08:18.960 --> 0:08:19.040 Like? 0:08:19.120 --> 0:08:21.040 How much money do I have to make in order 0:08:21.080 --> 0:08:24.480 to not have to file taxes? What's the minimum? 0:08:24.760 --> 0:08:26.440 I thought it was twelve thousand dollars? 0:08:26.800 --> 0:08:30.360 Okay, all right, I feel like I'm the goal for 0:08:30.400 --> 0:08:32.720 this year. No, no, no, I feel like last year 0:08:33.559 --> 0:08:36.760 on the books, I didn't make that much money. 0:08:36.800 --> 0:08:39.000 Is trying to get out of not doing her taxes 0:08:39.040 --> 0:08:39.400 this year? 0:08:39.480 --> 0:08:40.560 Hashtag was Lee Snipes. 0:08:40.679 --> 0:08:42.640 Okay, this is the year. You don't want to go. 0:08:42.679 --> 0:08:44.360 Do you know what they just passed it? If you 0:08:44.400 --> 0:08:47.840 owe back taxes fifty thousand dollars or more, that they'll 0:08:47.880 --> 0:08:48.920 take your passport away. 0:08:49.240 --> 0:08:50.760 Okay, well I don't owe that much. 0:08:50.960 --> 0:08:56.120 I don't know that much. Also, my passport expired, damn city. 0:08:56.320 --> 0:08:59.720 Okay, no, I'm totally just than fifty thousand dollars for sure. 0:09:00.520 --> 0:09:02.520 I looked at tax money like that. 0:09:02.679 --> 0:09:05.480 Yeah I do. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not afraid 0:09:05.600 --> 0:09:08.559 or shame fuck this country. They not get my money. 0:09:08.880 --> 0:09:11.080 Throw me in jail if you have to. Y'all not 0:09:11.080 --> 0:09:12.360 getting none of my dollars. 0:09:12.760 --> 0:09:16.480 Listen, if you're listening to this, uh Orange Trump, we 0:09:16.559 --> 0:09:20.160 need an Orange expert, so you know, come through. 0:09:20.760 --> 0:09:23.559 Yeah, we need somebody like a tax expert. 0:09:23.679 --> 0:09:26.480 So he evaded taxes for twenty years. 0:09:26.600 --> 0:09:30.640 So he's a white man expert. He's a white man, 0:09:30.720 --> 0:09:31.520 so he can get away. 0:09:31.559 --> 0:09:33.840 I'm trying to need a white man expert because. 0:09:33.960 --> 0:09:36.960 We had a white He was from Connecticut. 0:09:37.040 --> 0:09:41.120 He was super he went to Salsburg, Salisbury, Salesburg. 0:09:41.559 --> 0:09:42.839 Wait, are you from Connecticut? 0:09:42.840 --> 0:09:45.440 I'm from Connecticut, Sow State. 0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:48.720 Okay, So let's talk about your background. Your parents yea 0:09:49.160 --> 0:09:50.640 born and raised in Connecticut. 0:09:50.720 --> 0:09:54.600 No, my dad was my mom's from Philly and my 0:09:54.640 --> 0:09:56.800 parents met at Howard when my mom was a freshman 0:09:56.840 --> 0:09:59.000 and my dad was a junior. And you transferred there 0:09:59.040 --> 0:10:01.880 from the University of Arizona. 0:10:01.040 --> 0:10:04.400 That sounds like a movie or show. Really, didn't Spike 0:10:04.480 --> 0:10:06.160 Lee do something like that? School days? 0:10:06.200 --> 0:10:07.080 He did do school days? 0:10:07.160 --> 0:10:07.520 He did. 0:10:07.600 --> 0:10:11.640 Yeah, your dad is from Arizona. No, he's from Connecticut. 0:10:11.640 --> 0:10:15.200 But he originally wanted to be a professional golfer. So 0:10:15.240 --> 0:10:19.400 your dad is super white? Is your mother's white? My 0:10:19.440 --> 0:10:20.120 mom is black? 0:10:20.280 --> 0:10:20.959 Okay? 0:10:21.200 --> 0:10:23.720 So how did you get so light Robin? What happened? 0:10:24.200 --> 0:10:27.600 What happened? You got Indian family? I don't have Indians. 0:10:27.640 --> 0:10:31.440 Are genetic testing is not Indian? I think I have 0:10:31.559 --> 0:10:34.000 some relatives that might have that line, but I don't. 0:10:35.720 --> 0:10:39.880 I have some white ancestors, like you know, great several 0:10:39.960 --> 0:10:44.280 of my great grandparents are half black. Okay, to share 0:10:44.320 --> 0:10:49.480 your white daddies, you know those white daddies. Wow. 0:10:50.120 --> 0:10:51.559 But then you ended up in Connecticut. 0:10:52.760 --> 0:10:56.160 Parents graduated and then moved from DC to Connecticut, went 0:10:56.200 --> 0:10:59.760 back to where my dad's hometown and then yeah, we 0:11:00.160 --> 0:11:02.400 up there. My family still lives there. I'm the only 0:11:02.400 --> 0:11:04.800 one that left. Actually, I'm glad you made it out. 0:11:04.920 --> 0:11:06.880 I really am. I'm so glad that you're here in 0:11:06.960 --> 0:11:09.120 New York City doing wonderful things. 0:11:09.440 --> 0:11:13.440 Thank you, doing super gay things. Yeah, you got shoulder 0:11:13.480 --> 0:11:16.440 pat you had elbow patches on your shirt. 0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:20.320 Now, don't let Marie say anything about anything that she because. 0:11:20.160 --> 0:11:21.360 Her shoulders are very broad. 0:11:21.440 --> 0:11:23.960 So no, no, no, but she has the elbow patches, not 0:11:24.000 --> 0:11:25.160 the shoulder elbow patch. 0:11:25.240 --> 0:11:26.079 What's happening right now? 0:11:26.160 --> 0:11:26.520 I don't know. 0:11:26.559 --> 0:11:30.280 We're just talking about I tried to be as gay 0:11:30.320 --> 0:11:31.880 as possible today. I know. I see you had on 0:11:31.920 --> 0:11:37.000 a ward. You go, yep, they're not marrels. Though they're 0:11:37.040 --> 0:11:39.719 not marrels at all, not mar You were there for 0:11:39.840 --> 0:11:42.280 the show the Marrels at home. Yeah, do you have 0:11:42.360 --> 0:11:46.960 a respect. I do not currently have marrels, but I 0:11:47.040 --> 0:11:49.400 have had a pair or two. 0:11:49.480 --> 0:11:50.360 I'm here for a maryl. 0:11:50.440 --> 0:11:52.800 I mean it is a white man Timberlain boot and 0:11:52.920 --> 0:11:55.160 I feel like, yo, they are so comfortable. 0:11:55.160 --> 0:11:58.720 Though there's I heard they're comfortable. They don't look comfortable. 0:11:58.800 --> 0:11:59.520 They're hideous. 0:11:59.559 --> 0:12:02.920 They make me uncomfortable. Yeah. Yeah, there was a time 0:12:02.960 --> 0:12:05.280 in the early two thousands where I did might have 0:12:05.320 --> 0:12:06.280 warned them to work. 0:12:06.679 --> 0:12:10.640 So, Robin, how long have you been a lesbian? Since 0:12:10.679 --> 0:12:13.199 I came out of my mother's womb? All your life, 0:12:13.440 --> 0:12:15.600 all my life, I've been fighting. 0:12:16.960 --> 0:12:19.439 Yeah. I think when I was like nine, you know, 0:12:19.720 --> 0:12:22.640 I would I didn't know what a lesbian was. I 0:12:22.640 --> 0:12:24.599 didn't know the word, but I definitely was like I 0:12:24.679 --> 0:12:28.520 don't like boys. H And then around twelve I realized 0:12:28.559 --> 0:12:30.440 what a lesbian was. And then I was like, oh, 0:12:30.520 --> 0:12:33.720 that's me twelve, y'all teaching teaching the kids. Early. My 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:35.599 mom gave me this book called Girls and Sex and 0:12:35.640 --> 0:12:39.199 they had a whole chapter, chapter five, okay, called lesbianism. 0:12:39.600 --> 0:12:41.440 And I read it and I was like, oh, I 0:12:41.480 --> 0:12:42.160 didn't get that. 0:12:43.360 --> 0:12:46.040 See my great aunt raised me, and like there was 0:12:46.320 --> 0:12:48.839 one kid that had a mom with a really short 0:12:48.880 --> 0:12:52.040 haircut and my aunt called her a bull dyke and 0:12:52.120 --> 0:12:54.760 I didn't know what that was. And they had a 0:12:54.800 --> 0:12:56.840 sleepover and she's like, no, you can't spend the night 0:12:56.880 --> 0:12:57.640 at the bull dyke. 0:13:00.559 --> 0:13:03.600 And I was like, what is a pod tike? I said, 0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:04.680 that does not say? 0:13:05.520 --> 0:13:06.520 Is that a character on? 0:13:06.800 --> 0:13:07.920 Like? Actually ask her? 0:13:08.000 --> 0:13:09.839 I asked, and she didn't tell me, but she's like, 0:13:09.880 --> 0:13:11.640 you don't need to know nothing like your business. 0:13:11.640 --> 0:13:12.640 You're not You're not. 0:13:12.600 --> 0:13:13.439 Never going over there. 0:13:13.520 --> 0:13:15.720 Yeah, and if they give you a sandwich, throw it 0:13:15.720 --> 0:13:18.520 out like damn, no tuna, no, no tuna. 0:13:19.520 --> 0:13:22.440 So you were nine and you like what nine year 0:13:22.480 --> 0:13:27.680 old likes. Boys, I feel like when you're when you're nine, 0:13:28.320 --> 0:13:28.679 it was. 0:13:28.679 --> 0:13:31.840 Just a feeling like I I could see the girls 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:34.880 in my class were, you know, operating differently, and I 0:13:35.000 --> 0:13:36.200 was like, not about that life. 0:13:36.559 --> 0:13:39.200 I made it with my my uh next door neighbor 0:13:39.400 --> 0:13:41.560 who was a girl and she was a little bit older, 0:13:41.880 --> 0:13:42.439 and I was like. 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:47.600 Oh, Sydney, you're giving alternative facts right now. Sydney was 0:13:47.880 --> 0:13:51.359 like seven and her neighbor was like fifteen. 0:13:51.600 --> 0:13:54.640 Oh, don't listen, it's going to be like the child of. 0:13:59.080 --> 0:14:01.320 It was a lord. As the episode. 0:14:01.520 --> 0:14:04.400 It was not shut up, Marie, She's consent. 0:14:04.800 --> 0:14:08.199 It was Rands. It was okay with it? Ken, Yeah, 0:14:08.240 --> 0:14:09.400 but Kenna's seven year old. 0:14:09.480 --> 0:14:13.040 Give I wasn't seven. I was like eleven, and she was. 0:14:13.080 --> 0:14:14.120 She was twenty seventeen. 0:14:14.280 --> 0:14:15.720 She was, she was twenty one. 0:14:16.920 --> 0:14:20.120 She had a mortgage, she had like her own own house. 0:14:20.840 --> 0:14:22.120 She was like, I'm gonna take you for a job. 0:14:23.320 --> 0:14:25.160 I said, long as you're not sleeping on your mother's couch, 0:14:25.160 --> 0:14:25.800 I'm fine with it. 0:14:26.080 --> 0:14:29.400 No, it was how old was she? She was like 0:14:29.640 --> 0:14:33.400 four or five years older than me? She was forty. 0:14:33.400 --> 0:14:34.040 Made out with her. 0:14:34.200 --> 0:14:34.920 I made out with. 0:14:34.840 --> 0:14:37.720 Her in a garage behind a car. And what did 0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:38.840 that entail? Exactly? 0:14:39.080 --> 0:14:41.360 Just like a little kiss, will make out like tongue. 0:14:41.880 --> 0:14:44.640 No over the no second base, No over the door 0:14:44.640 --> 0:14:46.640 of the explorer, no Twitter action. No. 0:14:46.680 --> 0:14:49.560 I did not touch her you know, private area. I 0:14:49.560 --> 0:14:50.520 mean I touched her titties. 0:14:50.520 --> 0:14:51.720 But you did? Yeah? 0:14:51.960 --> 0:14:52.880 Really at eleven? 0:14:52.960 --> 0:14:57.360 You so fast, so touched for a long time. 0:14:57.400 --> 0:14:58.560 Wait when did you touch titties? 0:14:58.600 --> 0:15:01.520 Robin? Oh my god? When was your I like my 0:15:01.560 --> 0:15:06.440 first kiss, I was sixteen years old, Okay. I dated 0:15:06.480 --> 0:15:09.200 the captain of the basketball team, and that was the 0:15:09.480 --> 0:15:12.280 only other lesbian, Yes, the only other lesbian in my 0:15:12.360 --> 0:15:15.480 high school. And she took me to the Hartford Public 0:15:15.520 --> 0:15:18.320 Library where we would study. I used to tell my 0:15:18.360 --> 0:15:20.920 mom I was studying and she would meet me there. 0:15:21.400 --> 0:15:23.360 And then we were up in the German literature section 0:15:23.480 --> 0:15:27.560 one day, Yeah, because nobody was up there. She like 0:15:27.640 --> 0:15:29.680 lifted me up, put me on the windowsill and laid 0:15:29.720 --> 0:15:34.920 it on me. WHOA, that's like, did you lose it? 0:15:35.120 --> 0:15:36.760 I lost it? Robin. 0:15:36.800 --> 0:15:39.640 That's like like a Lifetime channel like when they have 0:15:39.720 --> 0:15:43.720 it was amazing list. That is like high school romance 0:15:43.800 --> 0:15:44.960 right there, Harlequin. 0:15:45.400 --> 0:15:47.440 Yeah, it was pretty. Did you lose your virginity in 0:15:47.480 --> 0:15:51.800 the library. I didn't, But I lost my virginity in 0:15:51.960 --> 0:15:56.440 my best friend's grandmother's apartment. Okay, that's everybody was visiting. 0:15:56.520 --> 0:16:00.360 She was away at Puerto Rico. Okay, lost in preaking 0:16:01.760 --> 0:16:05.480 like on her shag carpet, on the carpet, robit on 0:16:05.520 --> 0:16:08.000 the floor. You could get no bed on her bedroom. 0:16:08.040 --> 0:16:10.720 I don't want to have sex in her bed. I 0:16:10.720 --> 0:16:14.600 would rather well. And then like statues of Jesus everywhere. 0:16:14.200 --> 0:16:18.400 And the candles of like virgins and saints and stuff. Man, 0:16:18.760 --> 0:16:19.760 you're going straight ahead. 0:16:19.800 --> 0:16:21.840 Listen. If I'm gonna lose my virginia, I need to 0:16:21.840 --> 0:16:24.960 have some good support on my back. Yeah, I can't 0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:27.520 have like the hard ass floor with a terrible. 0:16:27.200 --> 0:16:28.840 Ass a really thick shag carpet. 0:16:29.000 --> 0:16:32.080 Okay, what does it mean when when a lesbian loses 0:16:32.120 --> 0:16:34.440 their virginity? What is that what you'll be doing? 0:16:35.200 --> 0:16:39.840 Well? Yeah, because people say scissoring, and I'm so it's 0:16:39.880 --> 0:16:43.400 so like old and dated, like you can't really get 0:16:43.400 --> 0:16:45.200 off on that. I mean, at least I can't. I 0:16:45.240 --> 0:16:47.360 don't know. Maybe some people do, but it was scissoring 0:16:47.480 --> 0:16:50.920 though not me. Both the people on the couch though, 0:16:51.000 --> 0:16:55.000 scissor shut up sitting on the opposite. 0:16:54.640 --> 0:16:55.160 Side of the room. 0:16:55.200 --> 0:16:56.160 And I don't want to know. 0:16:57.480 --> 0:16:58.920 I don't want any of that gay on me. 0:17:00.160 --> 0:17:03.200 I hate your grandma. Yeah, and I have time to 0:17:03.200 --> 0:17:03.680 do laundry. 0:17:03.720 --> 0:17:04.959 I don't want to that gay or anything. 0:17:07.520 --> 0:17:09.400 I'm like, so, why are y'all sinners here? 0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:15.000 She's like throwing a holy water at us. 0:17:16.520 --> 0:17:18.760 I know, I whant to look at you guys. So yeah, 0:17:18.880 --> 0:17:20.560 so what was that first? 0:17:20.760 --> 0:17:26.800 Yeah, I mean it was some finger popping and she 0:17:26.880 --> 0:17:30.160 went down on me. Wow, at me at sixteen. Yeah. 0:17:30.480 --> 0:17:32.760 Well see I hadn't had nobody to go down on 0:17:32.800 --> 0:17:34.640 me for a minute, Like I had to be kind 0:17:34.640 --> 0:17:35.800 of grown when it happened. 0:17:35.960 --> 0:17:37.560 It was kind of grown Sydney because you know, you 0:17:37.600 --> 0:17:40.440 lost your kissed somebody for the first time at six 0:17:40.760 --> 0:17:42.000 so kind of girl for yous. 0:17:41.880 --> 0:17:47.040 Thirteen, you know, like eighteen, like I man, you know, 0:17:47.119 --> 0:17:49.160 black dudes was not trying to go down on women. 0:17:49.320 --> 0:17:51.920 No, ma'am, No, it wasn't. Ye, it wasn't hip. 0:17:52.240 --> 0:17:54.240 It was not hip. They weren't down with that. So 0:17:54.320 --> 0:17:57.040 I had to wait until I got a like a 0:17:57.160 --> 0:17:59.440 secure black man to be like, yes, I go down 0:17:59.480 --> 0:18:00.879 on the women, It's okay. 0:18:01.680 --> 0:18:04.679 I don't. Don't they understand how the clip works? 0:18:04.760 --> 0:18:05.320 They don't. 0:18:05.359 --> 0:18:07.160 Most men don't though they really don't. 0:18:07.600 --> 0:18:09.040 They're missing out. That's what you should do. 0:18:09.040 --> 0:18:11.800 A class, Robin, Yes, all about clits. 0:18:12.040 --> 0:18:19.320 Click class Click class with Robin versheta cloud. I'll go 0:18:19.400 --> 0:18:22.400 to that class at the annex. Sorry, at the annex. 0:18:23.520 --> 0:18:25.800