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Speaker 1: Hi.

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Speaker 2: What's your name?

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Speaker 3: Uh, my name is Collette.

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Speaker 2: Collette collect. You texted me and you said, I'm a

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Speaker 2: thirty one year old woman who just got banned on Roadblocks?

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Speaker 3: Sure did? Sure did?

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Speaker 2: So tell me about that. How did you get banned

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Speaker 2: on Roadblocks?

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Speaker 3: I guess I've just been playing a lot because I

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Speaker 3: have a little brother, he's like, you know, fourteen, We've

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Speaker 3: been playing for years or whatever. But also it keeps

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Speaker 3: you out of trouble roadblocks does. But yeah, I just

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Speaker 3: moved to Atlanta and from Texas, and I'd just been

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Speaker 3: kind of in my head a lot, and so I've

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Speaker 3: been like just playing by myself. But I got this

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Speaker 3: new game on there. It was this like it was

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Speaker 3: supposed to be so chill. It was like a like

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Speaker 3: a treehouse tycoon, and basically all you got to do is,

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Speaker 3: you know, say, like get all these honeybees, you collect them,

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Speaker 3: you you know, you build your treehouse. But then also

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Speaker 3: everybody comes in and like murders you and stuff, and

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Speaker 3: you're like, I'm like, I don't understand why there's murdering

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Speaker 3: this game. There's like chill jazz music, there's bird sounds.

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Speaker 3: I really don't understand what this game is and why

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Speaker 3: everyone was treating it like a GTA server. But there

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Speaker 3: was these children and they rolled up that I couldn't

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Speaker 3: collect my honey. They parked their little car. They kept

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Speaker 3: on murdering me over and over again, and it just

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Speaker 3: really sent me because like I was really excited to

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Speaker 3: play this little game, and I just called them Brady

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Speaker 3: virgins and then well I tried to report them because

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Speaker 3: they were being very mean to me on the on

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Speaker 3: the chat, I did not appreciate it. And they don't

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Speaker 3: know what I'm going through. They don't know who they're

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Speaker 3: talking to. But yeah, I did tell them that I'm

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Speaker 3: sorry their parents are divorced, and I do regret that

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Speaker 3: because their parents are probably most definitely divorced.

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Speaker 2: What okay, why do you assume that their parents are divorced?

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Speaker 3: I mean just because of you know, the ratios. You know,

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Speaker 3: you can look at any like you know census.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, yeah, sure, yeah, sure, there's a there's a

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Speaker 2: fifty percent chance that that they're right. How old How

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Speaker 2: old do you think these kids are? These are like squeakers,

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Speaker 2: These were like thirteen year olds.

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Speaker 3: They're probably they're probably yeah, they're probably like the same

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Speaker 3: as in my little brother. It's probably like fourteen or something.

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Speaker 2: I mean, they probably should they probably should be virgins.

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Speaker 3: I mean, no, they should, I shouldn't. I I regret that.

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Speaker 3: I guess. It's just like, you know, like, what's your

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Speaker 3: I guess. I mean, I'm not really upset that they

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Speaker 3: are that they're virgins. That's not really it was. It

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Speaker 3: was just that like, obviously you haven't been through anything.

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Speaker 3: You're just a stupid virgin, which is really mean to

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Speaker 3: a lot of adult virgins. I get it, I understand.

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Speaker 3: I was They're they're reorganizing that. I'm going crazy right now.

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Speaker 2: They're life virsion, they're life virgins, their life.

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Speaker 3: Their life virgin.

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Speaker 2: Yes exactly, you know, uh yeah, yeah. I mean getting

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Speaker 2: into heated arguments with fourteen year olds on roadblocks is

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Speaker 2: probably crazy. It I you would feel irresponsible for me,

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Speaker 2: it is.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a little crazy. It's a little crazy. It's

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Speaker 2: undeniably a little crazy. But I'm let's talk.

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Speaker 3: I pull my little brother. What happened in all these

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Speaker 3: textan me was wow, And I was like, okay, now

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Speaker 3: I know that. I'm like I'm like losing it a

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Speaker 3: little bit, you.

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Speaker 2: Know, Okay, why do you why do you think you're uh,

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Speaker 2: why do you think you're losing it?

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Speaker 3: Well, okay, I just moved here. I was in Austin,

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Speaker 3: Texas doing like a weird family thing for a while.

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Speaker 3: I've been I've moved all around the country. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: I was only in Texas for a couple of years

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Speaker 3: because like my grandma and my mom wanted to like

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Speaker 3: hang out with me a little bit. I haven't really

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Speaker 3: lived around them for like over a decade, and that

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Speaker 3: was really really stressful. I have like very conservative, uh grandparents.

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Speaker 3: I mean, just like everybody else. It's a little bit

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Speaker 3: different though, when like you're mixed and like your white

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Speaker 3: family is like really really racist in like every possible way.

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Speaker 3: Pretty much, Like, yeah, the only person I kind of

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Speaker 3: like that I'm related to is my mom. But anyway,

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Speaker 3: that's a really really long story. You know, I'm really

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Speaker 3: okay like not talking about that, but yeah, it was

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Speaker 3: a lot. My grandma like started hospice while I was there,

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Speaker 3: and they were just like incredibly hard to please people

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Speaker 3: you kind of have to perform at all times. And

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Speaker 3: then also I like they kicked me out because I

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Speaker 3: asked them to stop talking about Trump with me. And

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Speaker 3: then so I had to like live with like this

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Speaker 3: really crazy girl and and she was a lot And

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Speaker 3: then I was also dating like of, you know, a

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Speaker 3: comedian who was like a severe alcoholic. It was just

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Speaker 3: like a lot of you know, stuff that didn't have

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Speaker 3: to do with me, which I'm usually pretty good at.

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Speaker 3: But I'm realizing that this is like the first time.

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Speaker 3: I've been wanting to get to Atlanta for a really

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Speaker 3: long time because I feel like all my hopes and

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Speaker 3: dreams and like a lot of like family that I

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Speaker 3: would like to get to now lives here. And I

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Speaker 3: just want to make movies and I want to make TV,

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Speaker 3: and like I've been working in production a long time,

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Speaker 3: and like I just want to like I've just been

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Speaker 3: wanting to come here and feel comfortable in my own

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Speaker 3: skin and just to have a lovely time. But now

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Speaker 3: that I'm here, it's like the self like I'm like

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Speaker 3: actually having to like be the person that I was

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Speaker 3: imagining being. And then I'm also realizing, you know that

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Speaker 3: that's the anxiety is like that part is like I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 3: this is like you you think about something for too

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Speaker 3: long and then like you're like, oh, this is It's

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Speaker 3: still me, I'm not like a different person. Yeah, and

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Speaker 3: so it's like still have to do all of those things,

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Speaker 3: like be a different person.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: And now I'm just like cursing kids out on roadblocks.

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Speaker 3: I mean that's crazy. I'm like I could be outside

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Speaker 3: right now, it's like gorgeous out. I could be like

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Speaker 3: meeting people, but I have a really I'm like so

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Speaker 3: good at meeting people that are like terrible for me.

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Speaker 3: So like I'm really terrified about like making new connections.

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Speaker 3: That's also I think, really what it is is that

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Speaker 3: I don't trust myself to like actually surround myself with

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Speaker 3: people that are like good for me. I think that's

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Speaker 3: really what it is too. Also, I just like don't

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Speaker 3: know where to start at this point.

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Speaker 2: You said so many things just now that pequked my interest. Okay, Okay,

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Speaker 2: I want to I'm trying to hold on to all

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Speaker 2: of them. Okay, one you said was first of all, Okay,

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry if I got I'm trying to get your

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Speaker 2: timeline correct because you because you said something, because you

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Speaker 2: threw a bunch of stuff out about like okay, your

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Speaker 2: family kicked you know, bad relationship with the family and

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Speaker 2: the alcoholic comedian and all this is that, this is

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Speaker 2: all before you moved to Atlanta.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, this was all before I moved to Atlanta. This

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Speaker 3: was like the first place I've ever lived with like,

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Speaker 3: that's just for me.

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Speaker 2: And then then you've.

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Speaker 3: Done things for family and other people, and like, this

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Speaker 3: is the first time I've ever done something that's like

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Speaker 3: just me.

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Speaker 2: And then when did you move to Atlanta?

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Speaker 3: Like a month ago?

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Speaker 2: And you're living with your little brother.

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Speaker 3: No, I'm not living with my little brother. My little

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Speaker 3: brother lives pretty close. He lives in Jacksonville, Florida.

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Speaker 2: Okay, but do you live with yeah, like, are you

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Speaker 2: living with family by yourself?

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Speaker 3: No? I live completely by myself and I don't have

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Speaker 3: like close family, like the family I have here. Oh shit,

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Speaker 3: my cat, Hi, are you ready to come in Jesus,

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Speaker 3: you've been gone for so long? But yeah, she it's

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Speaker 3: just me and my cat and my snake that I'm

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Speaker 3: hiding from the leasing office. But yeah, the family I

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Speaker 3: have here, they're like I haven't seen them since I

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Speaker 3: was like, you know, ten or something.

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Speaker 2: You know, And you said that you mainly came down

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Speaker 2: there to uh, well, you said you came down there

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Speaker 2: for a lot of reasons. But you one of the

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Speaker 2: reasons you said you came down there was because you

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Speaker 2: wanted to get closer to them.

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Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, I've got like my I've got like a

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Speaker 3: lot of my my dad's side of the family in Savannah.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, I've already like went and saw my grandma,

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Speaker 3: who's like great. She like has always like smoked like

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Speaker 3: two packs of Marbs a day, and like she like

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Speaker 3: drives trucks and like she's really mean, but she like

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Speaker 3: puts all of her heart and soul into like the

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Speaker 3: food she makes. Like she's like so classic. She look

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Speaker 3: a really nice lady.

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Speaker 2: Cool. How old is she she? I'm curious.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, she had my dad. Like my whole

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Speaker 3: family's just babies. My dad was like she had my

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Speaker 3: dad when she was fourteen. Wow, she got real on life. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: real unlucky. It was the guy she like lost her

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Speaker 3: virginity too, and he's like a real schmuck. Like he's

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Speaker 3: like a bad guy, but yeah he's crazy. And then yeah,

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Speaker 3: my dad and my mom had me. My mom her

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Speaker 3: parent her mom had her when she was nineteen and

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Speaker 3: then they pretty much did the same thing. They were

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Speaker 3: like twenty when they had me.

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Speaker 2: Okay, so I was imagined when you said your grandma,

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Speaker 2: I was imagining like kind of an old lady, but

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Speaker 2: she's younger.

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Speaker 3: Uh well I have yeah, like the one that's on

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Speaker 3: hospice in Texas. That's my mom's mom. And yeah, she's young,

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Speaker 3: but she's just like I mean, like her last name

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Speaker 3: is like Dangler. She like comes from like real poor,

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Speaker 3: like like her dad was like a huge drunk who

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Speaker 3: like spent all of their milk money like on alcohol

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Speaker 3: and gambling. So like all of her teeth fell out

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Speaker 3: by the time she was like thirty.

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Speaker 1: Just crazy, all.

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Speaker 2: Right, So I mean back to you are the other thing?

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Speaker 2: The thing, Yeah, back to you, you know, because I'm sure

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Speaker 2: that we could get it. I'm sure that we could.

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Speaker 2: We could write a whole textbook about your family lore.

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Speaker 2: I'm sure that the Lord sounds like it goes very crazy.

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Speaker 2: The well, the thing that you said that I was like, ah,

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Speaker 2: fucking amen to that is the thing about yeah you

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Speaker 2: imagine is is well yeah, okay, so once you I

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Speaker 2: also feel like and this is actually I think part

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Speaker 2: of like uh not to bring it to me, but

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Speaker 2: like a little part of like an existential crisis is

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Speaker 2: like what you sort of when you get a little

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Speaker 2: bit older, you begin to fully understand the fact that

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Speaker 2: there is no such thing as your future self, which

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Speaker 2: is a little there's no such there's no such thing

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Speaker 2: as your future self. And that's like a little scary,

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Speaker 2: you know, because I think we put a lot of

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Speaker 2: hopes and dreams and reliefs and plans and whatnot in

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Speaker 2: this bucket of some day and in the future self,

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Speaker 2: and but there's just it just never comes. There's no

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Speaker 2: such thing as the future self. So yeah, it's still you.

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Speaker 3: And I think that like the last two years have

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Speaker 3: just been so stressful that I like have really just

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Speaker 3: been like easing myself like self soothing with like a

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Speaker 3: future self in mind. Like that's been like a self

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Speaker 3: soothing like technique that I'm realizing. And that's it's it's

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Speaker 3: it's it's making itself really apparent.

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Speaker 2: Can I actually completely undermine everything I just said? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: because now I'm thinking about it, I'm like, I actually

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Speaker 2: there's kind of no such thing as the futureself. But

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Speaker 2: there also kind of is such a thing as a

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Speaker 2: future self, you know, because as human beings, we can

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Speaker 2: anticipate the future, so you.

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Speaker 3: Can manifize things and you can eventually like you can

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Speaker 3: do things. You can you can visualize things and make

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Speaker 3: them into fruition, not even just like you know you

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Speaker 3: can you can you can emulate something until it be you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well I actually actually kind of I just I

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Speaker 2: have disagree with what I said. I think that are

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Speaker 2: I mean, obviously, there is no future self. It's always

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Speaker 2: just gonna be you when you have to understand that,

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Speaker 2: But there is something about you can plan for the

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Speaker 2: future to the best you can, you know. I mean

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Speaker 2: you can do that financially, and you can do the

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Speaker 2: health wise, and you can do that. But a lot

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Speaker 2: of the times, yeah, I mean, the future self is

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Speaker 2: just kind of like a vehicle for procrastination. But anyway, okay,

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Speaker 2: I want to get okay past your family lawyer. We're

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Speaker 2: getting philosophical bullshit. No, it's okay. I'm I'm steering us

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Speaker 2: in those directions, and I take responsibility for that. Is

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Speaker 2: why are you? Why are you sitting at home alone

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Speaker 2: in your house yelling at teenagers on roadblocks.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I guess I'm just like realizing just like I

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Speaker 3: don't really like trust myself the way that I should. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I don't know, I don't know. Oh, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Well, I mean, let's talk about this, right is you

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Speaker 2: you set all these like okay, you want to make

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Speaker 2: movies and oh well, okay, let's let me ask you this.

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Speaker 2: You said that moving to Atlanta was something that you did,

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Speaker 2: uh for yourself. It's like one of the only things

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Speaker 2: you did, uh for yourself? Why did you do it?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: I just think that I think that I'm sorry. My

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Speaker 3: cat is driving me nuts. She's like yelling in like

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Speaker 3: the middle of our apartment.

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Speaker 1: Belief.

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Speaker 3: I think that what it is is that I've never

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Speaker 3: I've always wanted to make movies, and it was something

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Speaker 3: that like, uh, you know, I felt like really guilty

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Speaker 3: about for a long time for like familiar reasons or

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Speaker 3: that it wasn't like possible, Like nobody my family's ever

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Speaker 3: really really believed in me about that. But until like

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Speaker 3: my dad like one random time was like, asa, what

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Speaker 3: I worked on a gator Ade commercial And He's like

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Speaker 3: I saw your car and this gator Rade commercial and

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Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, like I mean I can do it,

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Speaker 3: Like there's like no reason like I can't. And I

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Speaker 3: guess I've just never like invested in like myself and

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Speaker 3: things that I wanted to do. I guess I've always

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Speaker 3: like chose like the safe option. I like decided to

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Speaker 3: do like clinical massage therapy because I was like, Okay,

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Speaker 3: well I can just do that while I'm like figuring

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Speaker 3: it out. And I've always just done like all these

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Speaker 3: I'm like a side quest person, and I've like had

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Speaker 3: a really hard time like with the big what are

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Speaker 3: you going to be when you grow up?

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Speaker 1: Question?

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Speaker 3: Right, But I've always done like a bunch of side

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Speaker 3: quests and I still kind of I mean, I still

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Speaker 3: do want to do that, but I guess that this

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Speaker 3: place just feels like there's a lot of opportunities for

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Speaker 3: me to do things that I want to do, like

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Speaker 3: and when it comes to like film, like I just

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Speaker 3: love being on a set in any capacity. It really

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Speaker 3: doesn't matter you.

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Speaker 2: Said you you said you work, do you currently work

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Speaker 2: in production, or you have worked in production.

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Speaker 3: I was doing a lot of it in Florida, and

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Speaker 3: I was doing a lot of like live concert stuff

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Speaker 3: for a long time, which was really cool, and then yeah,

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Speaker 3: I was working my way into the commercials. But Austin,

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Speaker 3: Texas was really really weird for that, Like the community

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Speaker 3: there is like really cutthroat and really quickie and intense.

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Speaker 3: So I didn't get to do that as much.

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Speaker 2: Do you pick Atlanta? Because it has started to keep

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Speaker 2: interrupting you. But I'm just trying to get down to like, yes, why.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you're trying to like figure it out.

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Speaker 2: Did you did you get Did you pick Atlanta? Because

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Speaker 2: there's because of all the product I mean, I.

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Speaker 3: I there's a lot of film here especially, yeah, and

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Speaker 3: a lot of like TV stuff.

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Speaker 2: When you say you want to like make film, do

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Speaker 2: you mean you.

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Speaker 3: Want if I could be if I could be like

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Speaker 3: if I could be like a like a like a

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Speaker 3: foli artist, but like the rest of my life, I'd

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Speaker 3: be very happy with that. If I could get in

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Speaker 3: a writer's room, I'd be really really happy with that.

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Speaker 1: Okay.

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Speaker 3: There's like so many different avenues of it that I'm

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Speaker 3: like really could be very happy doing. And that's why

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Speaker 3: I'm like so broad with it. It's like it's not

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Speaker 3: even like a like, oh, I don't know, it's like

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Speaker 3: a believe in myself that I could like direct. I

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Speaker 3: think I could, like I really do think that I like,

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Speaker 3: but I I there's so many different facets of like

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Speaker 3: filming something that I genuinely enjoy is what I mean.

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Speaker 2: So, Okay, that's good to know. So I you've been

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Speaker 2: Atlanta for a month, and yeah, have you have you

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Speaker 2: gone to any like fucking have you have you gone

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Speaker 2: to any like? You gotta see? That's that's that's the

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Speaker 2: thing is, there's a lot of And by the way,

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Speaker 2: I'm the king of short I am the king of

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Speaker 2: short term dopamine traps. Okay, I am a I am

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Speaker 2: a complete hypograph. I'm the king of short term dopamine loops.

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Speaker 2: So I say this with with uh uh you know

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Speaker 2: the heart, uh, yes, the if. I'm sure that yelling

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Speaker 2: at a at a little kid on roadblocks probably feels amazing.

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Speaker 2: It's probably a great rush of adrenaline to to like

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Speaker 2: have something that, like to care about, like to like

336
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,880
Speaker 2: be giving, like, you know, because we're all just we're

337
00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:44,280
Speaker 2: all just looking for reasons to get out of our

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Speaker 2: fucking head and into something, and sometimes that desire is

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Speaker 2: what leads us to spend any amount of time or

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Speaker 2: effort or fucks to give about getting a little kid

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Speaker 2: banned from roadblocks. That's why you're doing that. It's because

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Speaker 2: you're in I was I was driving down the road,

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Speaker 2: uh yesterday and somebody like started slowing this the guy

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Speaker 2: the car in front of him was slowing down, and

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Speaker 2: then they started like backing up or something like just

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Speaker 2: in the middle of the road. And I yelled, and

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Speaker 2: I yelled, are you a fucking moron? And then I

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Speaker 2: and then I and then I went I turned around,

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Speaker 2: and then I and then I passed the car and

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Speaker 2: then I was like, oh my god, that felt so good.

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Speaker 2: My entire body and brain and essence was fully in

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Speaker 2: that moment of calling that person a fucking more. It

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Speaker 2: feels good. That's why we do it.

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Speaker 3: Well, Yeah, I don't think I'll ever get I think

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Speaker 3: the road rage contained to your car will always be

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Speaker 3: a healthy outlet. And you can't change my mind on that.

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Speaker 2: You know what, maybe maybe maybe you're right, Maybe maybe

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Speaker 2: it is. I felt good, I felt it was cathartic.

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't again, and you know what, and you're right,

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Speaker 2: you're right as long as it's I think would be,

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't want to, like I would never you know,

362
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Speaker 2: go to the person to their fate, like you know,

363
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Speaker 2: as you're right as long as it's contained in your

364
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Speaker 2: own car. Sure, anyway, why don't anyway? Yeah, I mean

365
00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:17,400
Speaker 2: all this really comes down to is like, I mean, dude, here,

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Speaker 2: if I could give like, if I could give some

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Speaker 2: suggestions here. I don't always feel inclined to give suggestions

368
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Speaker 2: or feel like I know what I'm talking about here,

369
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Speaker 2: but because it's like, you know.

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Speaker 3: You used to and I remember an episode where you

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Speaker 3: were talking about the ship.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I used to live in I used to

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Speaker 2: live in Atlanta a couple of times, and you know,

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Speaker 2: just this particular and you know, being doing film production

375
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Speaker 2: ship and so this particular avenue. I feel, why don't

376
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Speaker 2: you go on like meetup or Facebook or Instagram or

377
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:53,320
Speaker 2: whatever and just like go to fucking like networking events

378
00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:57,879
Speaker 2: or even or even right, why don't you go on

379
00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:02,280
Speaker 2: like IMDb or LinkedIn or Twitter or whatever the fuck

380
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:08,360
Speaker 2: and like email ten different Foley artists and be like, hey,

381
00:20:08,920 --> 00:20:11,760
Speaker 2: you know, can I ask you for advice on getting

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Speaker 2: into the industry? Not like hey can I you know,

383
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,760
Speaker 2: have a job, but like, hey, you know, yeah, so

384
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Speaker 2: you just just gotta network. And by the way, people

385
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:24,840
Speaker 2: think that networking is like people the word networking is

386
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Speaker 2: gross to a lot of people.

387
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Speaker 3: But it's it's the only way you get anywhere.

388
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Speaker 2: But I also it's not even I don't even think

389
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Speaker 2: it's gross. It's like it's connecting, you know. I mean

390
00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:38,400
Speaker 2: that's what you should it's people. That's what you should

391
00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:42,200
Speaker 2: be doing. Is you should be out in your industry

392
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Speaker 2: connecting with other people and not you know, at home

393
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Speaker 2: alone yelling at teenage. It's good. It's not a gross

394
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Speaker 2: thing to want to network.

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Speaker 3: Yeah it is. Okay, okay, thank you. That's actually really

396
00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:00,840
Speaker 3: a good advice. Then do that.

397
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:02,960
Speaker 2: So yeah, I mean that's what I would do, is

398
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:06,080
Speaker 2: find if you have a I mean it's also it's

399
00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:08,920
Speaker 2: so great that you have a specific because a lot

400
00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 2: of people are like, oh, I want to make something,

401
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:13,800
Speaker 2: but you know what it is and whatever the fact.

402
00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:16,439
Speaker 2: But to have like a specific vision and be like

403
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:18,960
Speaker 2: I want to be a folly artist, I mean, god damn.

404
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,800
Speaker 2: Go you know, go talk to the people who are

405
00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:25,200
Speaker 2: literally doing what you want to do and they're accessible

406
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:26,080
Speaker 2: to get like.

407
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:29,119
Speaker 3: An audio engineering degree, and I don't know if I

408
00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:31,920
Speaker 3: should do that. I think you think it's a kind

409
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:34,720
Speaker 3: of audio engineering kind of like a useless degree.

410
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,679
Speaker 2: You know what, you know what Instead of asking me

411
00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:43,200
Speaker 2: because I have no idea, go go find Yeah, seriously, seriously,

412
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:47,040
Speaker 2: write a billion fucking questions down and then go to

413
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Speaker 2: like one of these networking events that I'm sure happen

414
00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:55,320
Speaker 2: all over Atlanta and ask these people, ask that question

415
00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:58,119
Speaker 2: to these people. You know this we live in. We

416
00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:04,119
Speaker 2: live in there's a lot of like, uh doomerism around

417
00:22:04,160 --> 00:22:07,760
Speaker 2: the connectedness of our society nowadays. And I could get

418
00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:10,399
Speaker 2: at philosophical bullshit whatever, but like, I don't know this,

419
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:13,600
Speaker 2: Like the tools exist for you to find people who

420
00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:15,840
Speaker 2: are doing exactly what you want to do and reach

421
00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:21,119
Speaker 2: out to them. And by all, there's I see no

422
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:22,919
Speaker 2: reason why if you reach out to ten of them,

423
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:25,280
Speaker 2: at least one of them wouldn't be wouldn't love to,

424
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:28,440
Speaker 2: you know, talk to you. Because that's why, Because I

425
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:31,080
Speaker 2: think I think people people want to do that. People

426
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:34,760
Speaker 2: want to send the elevator back down when they, you know,

427
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,560
Speaker 2: get further in their careers. It makes them feel good.

428
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:41,320
Speaker 2: So you know, do that again instead of going going

429
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Speaker 2: and saying alone in your house and yelling at teenagers.

430
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Speaker 3: I will, I will. Yeah, I think I'm finally at

431
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,760
Speaker 3: the point in my life where I'm like more comfortable

432
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:57,160
Speaker 3: being alone. But uh, yeah, I think that the only

433
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Speaker 3: spiraling thing that I'm feeling is like what I'm supposed

434
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Speaker 3: to be doing. But being alone is like sick, which

435
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:05,879
Speaker 3: it did not used to be the case.

436
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:09,600
Speaker 2: Okay, good, good, a lot of for a lot of

437
00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:10,640
Speaker 2: people being alone as hell.

438
00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:16,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, so as long as I don't spent too long

439
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:18,520
Speaker 3: on robugs, I think, yeah, it's a good thing.

440
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:19,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

441
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:22,280
Speaker 3: But yeah, it's been honestly really terrifying to you because

442
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:26,240
Speaker 3: I feel like every time I have sets out in Atlanta,

443
00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:29,400
Speaker 3: it's only like romance trying to find me, and that's

444
00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:30,320
Speaker 3: really frustrating.

445
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:31,560
Speaker 2: Wait, what do you mean? What do you mean it's

446
00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:35,160
Speaker 2: only romance trying to find you?

447
00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:41,040
Speaker 3: It's I'm I'm consistently having people trying to date me

448
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:44,240
Speaker 3: in a capacity and I can't find any friends.

449
00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:48,400
Speaker 2: Why do I feel I'm I'm hold on, I'm invested

450
00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:51,000
Speaker 2: in this. Give me one second. I'm I feel I

451
00:23:51,119 --> 00:23:52,840
Speaker 2: genuine because I feel like there's got to be like

452
00:23:52,880 --> 00:24:00,600
Speaker 2: a fucking like women filmmakers meet up in Atlanta that

453
00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:03,359
Speaker 2: you can go to friends. I really just got that.

454
00:24:03,640 --> 00:24:05,800
Speaker 2: There's no way that doesn't exist.

455
00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:09,280
Speaker 3: It has to, right, it has to me.

456
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:13,440
Speaker 2: Look Look here, what is this? Look? What is this

457
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:19,159
Speaker 2: film hub Atlanta? I literally just googled this there's the

458
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:23,800
Speaker 2: film Fatals, an international collective of Yeah, there's all there's

459
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:26,320
Speaker 2: all kinds of this ship. I'm I yeah, there's all

460
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:28,919
Speaker 2: kinds of this ship. Look upcoming events Atlanta. Hold on,

461
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:32,280
Speaker 2: bro look at this. Look I mean this is a

462
00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:36,920
Speaker 2: past event, but uh, this is a women in Film

463
00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:40,199
Speaker 2: and Atlanta event Saturday, April twenty sixth. It's passed. But

464
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 2: I just said, these things exist, you know they do.

465
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:45,840
Speaker 2: You're right, you can join. Look, this is the whole thing.

466
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:48,920
Speaker 2: You can join. Look at this. W i f t

467
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:53,119
Speaker 2: a dot org volunteer. Look at this. You should be

468
00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:55,719
Speaker 2: on this website. Literally, lear you go right now, go

469
00:24:55,760 --> 00:25:02,159
Speaker 2: to w i f t a dot org slash get

470
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:08,160
Speaker 2: dash involved and it says volunteer, get what get involved?

471
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:14,000
Speaker 2: Fucking send them an email. Just you know, just I

472
00:25:14,359 --> 00:25:17,240
Speaker 2: just this is I'm getting specific about it, but it's

473
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:21,840
Speaker 2: like I just just do anything to jog your brain

474
00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:26,720
Speaker 2: into realizing that there's there's there's other options for you

475
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:29,600
Speaker 2: besides again, besides yelling at teenage us on the internet.

476
00:25:30,960 --> 00:25:35,359
Speaker 3: Thank you, thanks Lyle. Hey did you ever watch Perfect Days?

477
00:25:35,840 --> 00:25:35,959
Speaker 4: No?

478
00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:38,679
Speaker 2: I haven't. I thank you, By the way, Because this

479
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 2: I feel like I'll have multiple streams in a row

480
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:45,520
Speaker 2: where I'm like, I think I'm pretty useless, but I

481
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:48,480
Speaker 2: felt good about this call. So thanks for letting me

482
00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 2: yell at you. Collecte.

483
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:56,639
Speaker 3: Thanks for yelling at me, Lyle. It's been a pleasure.

484
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:58,560
Speaker 3: This is my first time ever really calling.

485
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:00,919
Speaker 1: Okay, that you chose me.

486
00:26:02,480 --> 00:26:03,639
Speaker 2: Is there anything else you want to say to the

487
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:05,040
Speaker 2: people of the computer before we go?

488
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:07,360
Speaker 4: Mmm?

489
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:13,600
Speaker 3: Sometimes I claim to know a guy, but I can't

490
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:18,080
Speaker 3: tell you what his hands look like. All right, Lyle, all.

491
00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:21,640
Speaker 2: Right, Colleede, you have a good one. Bye bye bye.

492
00:26:23,119 --> 00:26:26,240
Speaker 2: I don't know what did that she's Sometimes I claim

493
00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:27,560
Speaker 2: to know a guy, but I don't know what his

494
00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:32,800
Speaker 2: hands look like. Is it like a is that a

495
00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:39,199
Speaker 2: sex joke? What is that? Anyway? Anyway, Man, vivance is awesome.

496
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:41,080
Speaker 2: I feel like a real person. That's what it is.

497
00:26:41,480 --> 00:26:43,080
Speaker 2: That's what it is. I've had a lot of street

498
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:47,159
Speaker 2: I mean, maybe that's not what it is, but my

499
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:50,080
Speaker 2: energy as a human being, I think to do this

500
00:26:50,119 --> 00:26:53,680
Speaker 2: podcast is finite. And there's a lot of times where

501
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:56,000
Speaker 2: it's like nine pm and I'll chuck and I you know,

502
00:26:56,480 --> 00:26:59,560
Speaker 2: I got a record, and I'll chug a fucking mountain

503
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 2: dew and then I'll and then I and then someone's

504
00:27:02,119 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 2: talking to me and I'm zoning out, and I'm like, oh,

505
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,880
Speaker 2: of course that's happening. Why would that not be happening

506
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:11,520
Speaker 2: right now? I'm always trying to solve for X, for

507
00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:17,159
Speaker 2: like how to feel good and present? Yeah, I don't know,

508
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:22,159
Speaker 2: I'm rambling, but yeah, good luck Collette. Uh try to

509
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:26,560
Speaker 2: do stuff? Hello? Hello, Hello? What's up?

510
00:27:26,560 --> 00:27:29,000
Speaker 1: Man? What's happening on?

511
00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:31,600
Speaker 2: Not much where you call him? Are you a brit

512
00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:35,760
Speaker 2: Are you a Brits? No Ah, there we go? What

513
00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 2: part of Australia? Are you in Sydney? Kick ass man?

514
00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:43,240
Speaker 2: I had a great time in Sydney when I went there.

515
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,479
Speaker 2: Do you do you like it? Or are you like us?

516
00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:46,200
Speaker 2: Is where I live?

517
00:27:48,359 --> 00:27:51,639
Speaker 1: It's just where you live your I'll not PayPal travel

518
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:54,520
Speaker 1: he from all over the world and people get exhitited

519
00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:56,320
Speaker 1: to say it about For me, it shifts a lock.

520
00:27:58,359 --> 00:28:00,560
Speaker 1: It's an as though it is a beautiful city. We've

521
00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:04,480
Speaker 1: got some good local beaches and there's a lot of

522
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 1: like restaurants and you know, nice places to eat out.

523
00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:12,360
Speaker 1: But you know, you always feel like wherever you live,

524
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 1: you always feel like you just live in a bubble.

525
00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:17,560
Speaker 1: You know, because you go to your job and to

526
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:19,640
Speaker 1: do your thing, and it's kind of like you get

527
00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:20,800
Speaker 1: caught up in the routine.

528
00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:27,200
Speaker 2: Sometimes, Yeah, are you Are you in a bubble? That's

529
00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:31,040
Speaker 2: a stupid question, but it remains.

530
00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:34,720
Speaker 1: It feels like that five days of the week and

531
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,720
Speaker 1: then the other two days of the week. Sometimes you

532
00:28:38,080 --> 00:28:42,600
Speaker 1: try to break free of that bubble, do something, you know,

533
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:47,120
Speaker 1: out of the ordinary, but sometimes you just end up

534
00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:50,120
Speaker 1: getting stuck in the bubble still, and then you just

535
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:52,880
Speaker 1: live this life in a bubble because it feels like,

536
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:59,000
Speaker 1: I don't know, sometimes it's just financeers that feel like

537
00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:02,600
Speaker 1: it's holding you back from breaking free of that bubble.

538
00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:06,160
Speaker 2: You said that on the weekends you try to break

539
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:07,440
Speaker 2: out of the bubble. What do you do on the

540
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,280
Speaker 2: weekends to try to break out of the bubble?

541
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:16,200
Speaker 1: You know, I don't so much. I haven't been doing

542
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 1: it as much lately, but I did, like, you know,

543
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:21,400
Speaker 1: I do like going out to the beach or going

544
00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,920
Speaker 1: on a hike or just you know, getting outdoors and

545
00:29:24,920 --> 00:29:27,960
Speaker 1: getting out in nature. But i've you know, I had

546
00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:30,960
Speaker 1: a bit of a work related incident this year and

547
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:33,959
Speaker 1: it's impacted my ability to do a lot of things.

548
00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:37,200
Speaker 1: So I guess I'm just kind of been stuck in

549
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:37,800
Speaker 1: the bubble.

550
00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:42,360
Speaker 2: Is that Is that something you want to talk about?

551
00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:51,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess I could talk about it. So earlier

552
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:56,560
Speaker 1: on this year. I so for work, I work in construction.

553
00:29:56,760 --> 00:30:05,120
Speaker 1: I operate a piece of mobile plant, the plan I'm

554
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 1: referring to. It's a vacuum truck and I dig holes

555
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:17,719
Speaker 1: with it. So it's a big truck, and it's got

556
00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 1: a huge tank on the back, and you have a

557
00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:23,440
Speaker 1: hose that comes off of the truck and you it's

558
00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 1: a vacuum hose, and you run out a high pressure

559
00:30:27,120 --> 00:30:31,560
Speaker 1: water hose as well, and you dig holes using the

560
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:36,240
Speaker 1: high pressure water and the vacuum from the truck to

561
00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 1: expose underground services in such an electrical gas and water.

562
00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:47,560
Speaker 1: And I was dig in holes earlier this year and

563
00:30:47,760 --> 00:30:53,000
Speaker 1: I dug you know, I dug this hole, and I

564
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:56,400
Speaker 1: kind of, you know, after I was finished digging the hole.

565
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 1: The holes were supposed to be covered by the you know,

566
00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:02,880
Speaker 1: one of these workers on the job side, and he's

567
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:08,440
Speaker 1: you know, covered the whole poorly, and I've misstepped and

568
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:12,760
Speaker 1: I've fallen in the hole. I fell in the hole.

569
00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 1: It was only about to meet a beat, but you know,

570
00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:21,040
Speaker 1: I landed directly on top of the water main that

571
00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 1: was in the ground, and it's then I shock up

572
00:31:23,240 --> 00:31:28,920
Speaker 1: my spine and I've slipped the disc and it's caused

573
00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:34,160
Speaker 1: some you know problems and some psciattica. So it's affected

574
00:31:34,280 --> 00:31:40,080
Speaker 1: my right leg completely. It's impacted my ability to exercise,

575
00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:43,840
Speaker 1: which has been quite difficult for me because exercise has

576
00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:49,680
Speaker 1: always been a bit of an outlet for me. So yeah,

577
00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 1: and that's it, man, It's been a bit of a

578
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,040
Speaker 1: head fuck, if I'm being honest.

579
00:31:57,160 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 2: Well, I'm sorry to hear that. Man, When did this

580
00:31:59,160 --> 00:31:59,960
Speaker 2: all happen.

581
00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:04,920
Speaker 1: Back at start of February.

582
00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:08,400
Speaker 2: Did like, did you get any kind of like a

583
00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:09,479
Speaker 2: workman's camp.

584
00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:19,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, So it was complicated because when it first happened,

585
00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 1: the company that I worked for thought it was just

586
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:27,320
Speaker 1: going to be, you know, maybe a one or two

587
00:32:27,440 --> 00:32:30,600
Speaker 1: day thing, so they didn't want to file any claims

588
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 1: or do anything through the workers' compensation, and you know,

589
00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:39,040
Speaker 1: a couple of days. You know, even on the day

590
00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:43,520
Speaker 1: of the incident, it wasn't didn't feel like a big

591
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:46,840
Speaker 1: deal at the time, and then the next morning I

592
00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:49,320
Speaker 1: woke up and I couldn't even I struggled to get

593
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:52,240
Speaker 1: out of bed. So I went and I called my

594
00:32:52,360 --> 00:32:54,240
Speaker 1: boss and I told him, I said, I've got to

595
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:57,240
Speaker 1: you know, I went to the doctors on the day

596
00:32:57,320 --> 00:33:01,880
Speaker 1: and he actually my boss come and picked me up

597
00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:06,840
Speaker 1: from the job site. Because the company I work for

598
00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:11,120
Speaker 1: a week contract to you know, these job sites. We

599
00:33:11,280 --> 00:33:14,800
Speaker 1: hire out our equipment to other job sites. So they

600
00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:16,400
Speaker 1: will call up and say, you know, we need a

601
00:33:16,480 --> 00:33:20,240
Speaker 1: vacuum truck for eight hours today, and they send out

602
00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:23,920
Speaker 1: me the operator. I'll drive the truck to the job

603
00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 1: site and I work for the client for eight hours.

604
00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:31,120
Speaker 1: So my boss has come after the incident, after he

605
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:32,920
Speaker 1: was made aware of it, picked me up from the

606
00:33:32,960 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 1: job site, taken me to his doctor, walked me into

607
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:39,760
Speaker 1: the doctor's office and tried to get me sign off

608
00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:43,360
Speaker 1: as you know, all clear and you know there were

609
00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:50,640
Speaker 1: no problems, and you know, it was a bit I

610
00:33:50,680 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 1: didn't really speak up at the time. I just let

611
00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 1: him say whatever he needed to say. And the doctor

612
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,120
Speaker 1: refused to sign the office because they're just like, we

613
00:33:57,160 --> 00:34:01,960
Speaker 1: don't know what the you know, we don't really know

614
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:04,480
Speaker 1: until we get some scans done. I can't just sign

615
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:06,440
Speaker 1: him off and say he's aw clear. He could have

616
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:09,799
Speaker 1: a slip disc or you might wake up tomorrow and

617
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:12,120
Speaker 1: not be able to move. And that's exactly what happened.

618
00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:16,719
Speaker 1: You know, next day, I wake up, struggled to get

619
00:34:16,760 --> 00:34:22,080
Speaker 1: out of bed straight away, went to my doctor without

620
00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:25,960
Speaker 1: my boss there being present, told them the whole situation.

621
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:29,680
Speaker 1: They asked if I wanted to do a workers do

622
00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:32,800
Speaker 1: it to workers compensation, and I said no, that's fine

623
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 1: because I knew that my boss didn't feel comfortable going

624
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:42,799
Speaker 1: to workers compensation, And they said they gave me a

625
00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:46,640
Speaker 1: referral to go get an MRI, which I had booked in,

626
00:34:47,360 --> 00:34:50,440
Speaker 1: and I got that within a few days, and the

627
00:34:50,560 --> 00:34:53,720
Speaker 1: MRI results showed that I'd slept a disc in my back,

628
00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:58,160
Speaker 1: and my doctor had said that I need to go

629
00:34:58,239 --> 00:35:03,520
Speaker 1: see a neurosurgeon immediately. Le So then I've called my boss.

630
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:10,319
Speaker 1: I've told them that that was the situation, and then

631
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:14,320
Speaker 1: they've gone ahead booked me in to see a different

632
00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:21,640
Speaker 1: doctor who then wanted to backtrack fill out our workers'

633
00:35:21,719 --> 00:35:25,880
Speaker 1: compensation claim, backtrack it to the actual day of the incident,

634
00:35:27,360 --> 00:35:31,800
Speaker 1: because they knew that if after I got the results

635
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:34,120
Speaker 1: from the MRI and my doctor said I need to

636
00:35:34,120 --> 00:35:36,160
Speaker 1: see neurosogeon. They knew it was going to be a

637
00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:38,040
Speaker 1: lot of money out of their pocket and this could

638
00:35:38,080 --> 00:35:41,680
Speaker 1: potentially go on for a long time and it would

639
00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:47,279
Speaker 1: end up costing them a lot more money. So they

640
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:53,400
Speaker 1: have then gone and you know, I set me up

641
00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:57,720
Speaker 1: with their doctor. I've been doing everything that their doctor

642
00:35:57,719 --> 00:36:00,719
Speaker 1: has been sane, It's gone through works coming. I've been

643
00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:04,759
Speaker 1: going to physio twice a week, multiple doctors appointment. The

644
00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:08,200
Speaker 1: first three to four weeks, I was on four different

645
00:36:08,280 --> 00:36:11,160
Speaker 1: pain management medications and it felt like none of it

646
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:17,120
Speaker 1: was helping. Over time with the physio and then slowly

647
00:36:17,239 --> 00:36:21,440
Speaker 1: weeding off of those medications and then slowly getting back

648
00:36:21,480 --> 00:36:27,920
Speaker 1: into work, I have started to feel better, but they

649
00:36:27,960 --> 00:36:32,000
Speaker 1: still haven't signed me off yet because I'm now it's

650
00:36:32,040 --> 00:36:37,640
Speaker 1: still affecting my right leg. So, you know, a couple

651
00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:40,839
Speaker 1: of weeks ago went and I got another MRI and

652
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:43,719
Speaker 1: it's still showing that there's a problem there. And the

653
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:46,680
Speaker 1: doctor that they had set me up with is now

654
00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:50,680
Speaker 1: saying on to see a neurosurgeon, which is what my

655
00:36:50,840 --> 00:36:54,680
Speaker 1: doctor had said initially. So it kind of feels like,

656
00:36:56,120 --> 00:36:59,720
Speaker 1: you know that, well, all that time that I've spent

657
00:36:59,760 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 1: with doctor doing whatever he was saying, and ultimately now

658
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:07,400
Speaker 1: he's saying, I gotta go see a neurosoge and I

659
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:13,120
Speaker 1: feel like this is something that I kind of wanted

660
00:37:13,160 --> 00:37:16,640
Speaker 1: to do months ago, back when the incident first happened.

661
00:37:17,160 --> 00:37:20,920
Speaker 1: But they thought that maybe I was, you know, because

662
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:25,560
Speaker 1: it was my doctor. I was somehow, you know, they

663
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:30,560
Speaker 1: were I don't know they I feel like maybe they

664
00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:33,400
Speaker 1: thought I was all caught up with my doctor and

665
00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:40,200
Speaker 1: they were telling me to do something. You know, I

666
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:41,600
Speaker 1: don't know if you get what I'm saying.

667
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:45,680
Speaker 2: They thought it was fishy that you were bringing in

668
00:37:45,719 --> 00:37:51,360
Speaker 2: your doctor instead of their doctor. There's that basically what

669
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:55,399
Speaker 2: you're saying. Yeah, they well, well, yeah, I guess because

670
00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:57,080
Speaker 2: they don't want I mean, they want to be in

671
00:37:57,120 --> 00:38:03,359
Speaker 2: control of the situation. I would assume, yes, So are

672
00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:08,839
Speaker 2: you Are you having issues with like with with being

673
00:38:08,840 --> 00:38:11,920
Speaker 2: able to see your doctor in conflict with their doctor.

674
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:17,640
Speaker 1: I can see my doctor at any time, and that's

675
00:38:17,680 --> 00:38:21,320
Speaker 1: a part of the workers' compensation. I can change the doctors,

676
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:24,040
Speaker 1: I can change fhusio. I'm in control of the whole

677
00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:27,759
Speaker 1: situation essentially. But every time I brought it up to them,

678
00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:30,600
Speaker 1: if they're not happy about something, because they have not

679
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:33,720
Speaker 1: made this easy for me at all. You know, there's

680
00:38:33,840 --> 00:38:38,399
Speaker 1: been times, you know, when I'm at work and they're

681
00:38:38,440 --> 00:38:42,560
Speaker 1: coming up to me. They essentially think that I'm milking

682
00:38:42,600 --> 00:38:45,839
Speaker 1: the whole thing, or that I'm bullshitting my way through

683
00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 1: it just so i can stay on workers compensation without

684
00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 1: saying that directly. They have come up to me and said,

685
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 1: you know, like you've been honest with us about the

686
00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:59,640
Speaker 1: whole thing, and it's like like, I'm getting the skin,

687
00:39:00,160 --> 00:39:03,360
Speaker 1: I'm seeing your doctors, I'm doing everything that you guys

688
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:05,680
Speaker 1: want me to do, and still you're not happy with

689
00:39:05,719 --> 00:39:07,440
Speaker 1: it because they haven't signed me off.

690
00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:12,239
Speaker 2: You said you were back to work.

691
00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:17,120
Speaker 1: Though, right, yeah, but it's reduced hours.

692
00:39:16,840 --> 00:39:21,160
Speaker 2: Okay, and so so so what are they what are

693
00:39:21,160 --> 00:39:23,200
Speaker 2: they trying to do with they trying to like, are

694
00:39:23,200 --> 00:39:25,000
Speaker 2: they trying to be like, hey, we're no longer gonna

695
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:28,880
Speaker 2: because obviously you're still working with their doctor. Are they

696
00:39:28,880 --> 00:39:33,759
Speaker 2: trying to say like like you can't work with our

697
00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:36,320
Speaker 2: doctor on our dime anymore.

698
00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:41,920
Speaker 1: Well, a couple of weeks ago, my boss had come

699
00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:43,960
Speaker 1: up to me while I was at work, and he

700
00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:47,120
Speaker 1: was he approached the situation a lot differently to how

701
00:39:47,160 --> 00:39:51,160
Speaker 1: they had previously because it felt very threatening. They have

702
00:39:51,239 --> 00:39:53,480
Speaker 1: approached me a few times and it felt very threatening

703
00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:55,720
Speaker 1: in the way that they approached me. But this time around,

704
00:39:55,840 --> 00:40:00,680
Speaker 1: he was just like, you know, you, I feel like

705
00:40:00,920 --> 00:40:05,160
Speaker 1: you're telling us you're getting better, which I am slowly,

706
00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:07,480
Speaker 1: it is taking time, and I am getting better. I

707
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:10,239
Speaker 1: have made a lot of progress since the date of

708
00:40:10,239 --> 00:40:14,400
Speaker 1: the incident. And they're like, but we feel like you're

709
00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:17,480
Speaker 1: telling us one thing and then you're going into the

710
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:23,279
Speaker 1: doctor's office and you're telling them something different. And I said,

711
00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:28,760
Speaker 1: how can that be? Like, I'm not because they're also

712
00:40:28,960 --> 00:40:33,720
Speaker 1: they've also hired some third party, some guy that works

713
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:38,920
Speaker 1: for a third party rehab rehabilitation program who also works

714
00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:45,240
Speaker 1: with me to get my goals on track and things

715
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:47,920
Speaker 1: such as that. But he attends all of my doctor's

716
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:51,680
Speaker 1: appointments with me and writes down statements of things that

717
00:40:51,680 --> 00:40:55,160
Speaker 1: have been said, and he shares those things directly with

718
00:40:55,360 --> 00:40:56,040
Speaker 1: my employer.

719
00:41:00,520 --> 00:41:04,600
Speaker 2: That's fucking weird, man, that's fucking weird that they're like

720
00:41:05,360 --> 00:41:09,960
Speaker 2: hounding you about it.

721
00:41:09,960 --> 00:41:12,160
Speaker 1: It is weird. It's weird.

722
00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:14,960
Speaker 2: And I mean, you're leg I mean, I mean, well,

723
00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:17,640
Speaker 2: it's also like, look, I mean, you're what is it.

724
00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:23,200
Speaker 2: It's your right leg mainly right, yes, is your right how?

725
00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:26,440
Speaker 2: How how is your right leg doing? Is it still

726
00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:29,400
Speaker 2: like I mean, I assume what this was back in February.

727
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:34,760
Speaker 2: I mean, it probably takes a while to like fully rehabilitate,

728
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:37,560
Speaker 2: you know. I mean they're they're trying to like rush

729
00:41:37,640 --> 00:41:40,240
Speaker 2: your leg.

730
00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:45,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, they are. It's it is going to take a

731
00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:48,640
Speaker 1: while because it is stemming from the slit disc and

732
00:41:49,239 --> 00:41:51,640
Speaker 1: from what I know, those things take a long time

733
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:56,320
Speaker 1: to recover from. But it's made my right leg essentially,

734
00:41:56,840 --> 00:41:59,400
Speaker 1: like it's a little bit sloppy. I have to control

735
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:02,040
Speaker 1: over them. I can use that. I'm not really limping

736
00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:08,360
Speaker 1: when I walk or anything, but it's I have a

737
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:11,520
Speaker 1: bit of loss of control over my right foot and

738
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:17,120
Speaker 1: I can't, you know, do things like I can't run

739
00:42:19,280 --> 00:42:22,640
Speaker 1: when I'm you know, driving, it's kind of affecting my

740
00:42:22,760 --> 00:42:29,239
Speaker 1: ability to push on the accelerator and break not completely.

741
00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:32,200
Speaker 1: I can still drive, but my job does require me

742
00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:36,799
Speaker 1: to drive a truck, so you know, it's kind of

743
00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:41,960
Speaker 1: affected affecting my ability to work. And you know, they're

744
00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:44,560
Speaker 1: still trying to rush it along, and I just don't

745
00:42:44,600 --> 00:42:45,680
Speaker 1: know what to do at this point.

746
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:49,319
Speaker 2: But you can't you I mean, yeah, I mean if

747
00:42:49,320 --> 00:42:51,279
Speaker 2: they're trying to rush it along, but like, don't you

748
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:54,920
Speaker 2: have I mean, by the way, I mean, I am

749
00:42:55,640 --> 00:42:58,560
Speaker 2: in the grounds of things that I have no fucking

750
00:42:58,560 --> 00:43:00,640
Speaker 2: idea what I'm talking about, but I can I just

751
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:04,960
Speaker 2: can we assume that there's some kind of law or

752
00:43:05,080 --> 00:43:07,880
Speaker 2: like I don't know, like what are your what are

753
00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:11,560
Speaker 2: your rights in this situation? You know what I mean? Like,

754
00:43:11,640 --> 00:43:13,720
Speaker 2: did do you have anyone who's like telling you that ship.

755
00:43:17,880 --> 00:43:21,560
Speaker 1: Anyone that I've told things that are sucked up? And

756
00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:25,120
Speaker 1: I agree it is about the company that I work

757
00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:31,399
Speaker 1: for can be kind of a toxic workplace, and you.

758
00:43:31,360 --> 00:43:35,440
Speaker 2: Know, but I guess what I'm saying is like it's

759
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:38,120
Speaker 2: like it's like like they're trying to like like if

760
00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:41,880
Speaker 2: your boss is trying to like you know, uh like

761
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:47,960
Speaker 2: strong arm you into not paying for uh, not being

762
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:50,520
Speaker 2: on workers comp is that like you know, is that

763
00:43:50,719 --> 00:43:51,320
Speaker 2: is that illegal?

764
00:43:54,400 --> 00:43:58,360
Speaker 1: I don't think. I don't think it's legal.

765
00:43:58,880 --> 00:44:01,239
Speaker 2: So then well, I mean, so look, if it's not legal,

766
00:44:01,280 --> 00:44:03,759
Speaker 2: then don't you can kind of can't you kind of

767
00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:07,200
Speaker 2: be like uh, yeah, well you can. You can say

768
00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:09,000
Speaker 2: whatever you want. You can try to rush me as

769
00:44:09,080 --> 00:44:12,040
Speaker 2: much as you want, but uh, it doesn't fucking matter

770
00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:16,360
Speaker 2: because you know you have to pay for you have

771
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,719
Speaker 2: to pay for this, you know, so like I mean,

772
00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:20,440
Speaker 2: if they because if they do rush you along and

773
00:44:20,480 --> 00:44:23,879
Speaker 2: they do try to fuck you, I assume you can

774
00:44:23,920 --> 00:44:26,120
Speaker 2: just sue them. But I don't know. I can't assume

775
00:44:26,160 --> 00:44:29,840
Speaker 2: anything because I don't know anything about any of this ship,

776
00:44:30,520 --> 00:44:33,640
Speaker 2: either in America or Australia.

777
00:44:34,360 --> 00:44:40,120
Speaker 1: M hm, yeah, you need you need a lawyer, man,

778
00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:41,040
Speaker 1: You need a lawyer.

779
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:44,960
Speaker 2: You need a lawyer. You need a lawyer, not a gecko.

780
00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:50,640
Speaker 2: You need a lawyer, man.

781
00:44:53,640 --> 00:44:57,040
Speaker 1: A lawyer. But it wasn't really something that I'm looking to. Uh,

782
00:44:57,440 --> 00:45:01,239
Speaker 1: you know, Ti up U, it's already a bit of

783
00:45:01,239 --> 00:45:01,760
Speaker 1: a headache.

784
00:45:01,800 --> 00:45:05,200
Speaker 2: I don't want to I'm sure. I know, I'm sure,

785
00:45:05,200 --> 00:45:07,759
Speaker 2: and I I I I empathize with that. I get that.

786
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:11,719
Speaker 2: It's like you don't wanna you's don't want to deal

787
00:45:11,760 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 2: with it. But it still is my go ahead.

788
00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:21,600
Speaker 1: I was just gonna say, it still is my job

789
00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:25,640
Speaker 1: and uh, you know, my form of income and following this,

790
00:45:25,880 --> 00:45:28,719
Speaker 1: I'm not really it's uncertain what's going to happen. I

791
00:45:28,760 --> 00:45:30,080
Speaker 1: don't know if by the end of it, when they

792
00:45:30,120 --> 00:45:34,040
Speaker 1: saw me, They're going to be like I like you done,

793
00:45:34,960 --> 00:45:38,279
Speaker 1: pack up your ship and go, or that's to be

794
00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:39,920
Speaker 1: b my job.

795
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:42,680
Speaker 2: And I can hold on, hold on, I'm gonna I'm

796
00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:49,760
Speaker 2: gonna interrupt. What's your name again, job, Marcus? Whatever? Whatever

797
00:45:49,760 --> 00:45:55,560
Speaker 2: your name is? Marcus? Okay, just tell me have you

798
00:45:55,760 --> 00:45:58,480
Speaker 2: have you consulted with a lawyer? Have you even spoken

799
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:03,440
Speaker 2: with a lawyer? Have you even called? I'm on the phone, No, Marcus,

800
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:07,920
Speaker 2: call a law Marcus, hang up the phone right now, Marcus.

801
00:46:07,960 --> 00:46:13,120
Speaker 2: I'm gonna keeck Marcus, hang up the Marcus. I what

802
00:46:13,160 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 2: time is it in Australia right now?

803
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:18,279
Speaker 1: Uh? Six am?

804
00:46:18,360 --> 00:46:20,840
Speaker 2: Six am? Okay, Marcus? What were you doing up so

805
00:46:20,960 --> 00:46:23,560
Speaker 2: late or early? You have to work?

806
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:28,880
Speaker 1: I actually don't have what till ten I am, but

807
00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:30,640
Speaker 1: I wanted to get the fuck out of the assid

808
00:46:30,719 --> 00:46:32,520
Speaker 1: whether it won't pay any of my family.

809
00:46:33,640 --> 00:46:36,520
Speaker 2: How How old are you? Marcus?

810
00:46:37,040 --> 00:46:37,720
Speaker 1: Twenty six?

811
00:46:38,280 --> 00:46:38,879
Speaker 2: Twenty six?

812
00:46:39,440 --> 00:46:39,560
Speaker 1: What?

813
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:43,960
Speaker 2: And you Marcus? Man? Listen? First of all, look, I

814
00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:47,880
Speaker 2: appreciate you, you know, being down to talk about all

815
00:46:47,920 --> 00:46:51,440
Speaker 2: this shit. I'm screaming at you that you need to

816
00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:53,680
Speaker 2: call a lawyer. I get the fear, right, I get

817
00:46:53,680 --> 00:46:55,960
Speaker 2: the fear of like, oh, you'll you know, like retaliation

818
00:46:56,160 --> 00:46:59,560
Speaker 2: from your boss or whatever. But like this is like,

819
00:46:59,560 --> 00:47:03,000
Speaker 2: like this it happens to people, and there are like

820
00:47:03,280 --> 00:47:07,640
Speaker 2: people who professionally help people who this shit happens to.

821
00:47:07,680 --> 00:47:09,359
Speaker 2: Because right because you don't have anyone on your side

822
00:47:09,400 --> 00:47:13,959
Speaker 2: right now, you just have your fucking it's just you

823
00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:21,080
Speaker 2: and your buddies and your versus like your your boss,

824
00:47:21,120 --> 00:47:23,640
Speaker 2: who's clearly not on your side, and you gotta go

825
00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:25,880
Speaker 2: fucking talk to somebody who's on your You got to

826
00:47:25,920 --> 00:47:28,680
Speaker 2: call a lawyer, man. Like it like the fact that

827
00:47:28,719 --> 00:47:31,040
Speaker 2: you even like if you had told me you were like, yeah,

828
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:34,799
Speaker 2: I consulted with a lawyer and they told me that

829
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:37,640
Speaker 2: you know this, that and the other reason why I

830
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:41,319
Speaker 2: shouldn't you know, fight back, and you know I'd have

831
00:47:41,360 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 2: to retain that, Like but but yeah, you haven't even

832
00:47:43,760 --> 00:47:46,480
Speaker 2: had a converse. I have a conversation with a lawyer, bro.

833
00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:50,760
Speaker 2: Just call one. Just call a lawyer. Just please please

834
00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:52,920
Speaker 2: call it. Please just call call a lawyer today.

835
00:47:52,960 --> 00:47:53,080
Speaker 4: Man.

836
00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:56,239
Speaker 2: I get and and and by everything that you're talking

837
00:47:56,320 --> 00:47:58,960
Speaker 2: about on the on this fucking show right now about

838
00:47:59,000 --> 00:48:01,680
Speaker 2: like oh I'm afraid about this. I'm afraid it's gonna

839
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:05,760
Speaker 2: be a hassle. I'm afraid that you know, they're gonna retaliate.

840
00:48:05,760 --> 00:48:08,200
Speaker 2: I'm gonna lose my job. I'm afraid of this. Write

841
00:48:08,239 --> 00:48:11,640
Speaker 2: down every single one of those fucking fears. Okay, then

842
00:48:11,680 --> 00:48:14,960
Speaker 2: you call a lawyer and you tell them every single

843
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:18,200
Speaker 2: one of those fears, and then have somebody have you know,

844
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:20,799
Speaker 2: have them explain to you. I mean it's literally their

845
00:48:20,880 --> 00:48:23,480
Speaker 2: job to deal with people in your situation. Go fucking

846
00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:26,360
Speaker 2: call like a workman's comp lawyer man and be and

847
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:29,439
Speaker 2: be vulnerable and be honest with them about all these

848
00:48:29,480 --> 00:48:33,520
Speaker 2: fears that you have about this situation, and like gets

849
00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:34,160
Speaker 2: get some help.

850
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:40,000
Speaker 1: Dude, that's good, boss.

851
00:48:40,160 --> 00:48:41,719
Speaker 2: And if you don't do it, I'm gonna come down

852
00:48:41,719 --> 00:48:43,799
Speaker 2: to Australia. I'm gonna fucking break your other leg.

853
00:48:49,880 --> 00:48:53,360
Speaker 1: I there's a part of me that wants to do

854
00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:55,200
Speaker 1: it because it's good at boss, and then there's a

855
00:48:55,200 --> 00:48:56,759
Speaker 1: part of me that doesn't want to do it, just

856
00:48:56,800 --> 00:49:00,719
Speaker 1: so you come down to Australia and bright the leg.

857
00:49:01,080 --> 00:49:02,640
Speaker 2: I know I'm not going to break your other leg.

858
00:49:02,840 --> 00:49:03,640
Speaker 2: I'm not going to do that.

859
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:05,359
Speaker 1: Bro.

860
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:07,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, call a lawyer. I don't hold on. I'm gonna

861
00:49:08,920 --> 00:49:12,160
Speaker 2: i don't know what is workman. I'm on Google right now.

862
00:49:12,200 --> 00:49:20,920
Speaker 2: Workmen's Comp lawyer, Sydney, Australia. Okay, there's a billion of them, bro,

863
00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:24,080
Speaker 2: Yeah go, there's so many, Bro, you gotta you gotta

864
00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:26,040
Speaker 2: call one of these lawyers. There's a billion of them,

865
00:49:26,160 --> 00:49:31,360
Speaker 2: workmen's comp lawyers, low apart. Yeah go, I hope you

866
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:34,279
Speaker 2: do this, man, I I I I It would make

867
00:49:34,320 --> 00:49:36,959
Speaker 2: me so happy if you took my advice and called

868
00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:39,480
Speaker 2: I called a lawyer instead of just like letting your

869
00:49:39,719 --> 00:49:41,359
Speaker 2: boss fuck you like this.

870
00:49:43,080 --> 00:49:43,400
Speaker 1: M hm.

871
00:49:46,160 --> 00:49:48,399
Speaker 2: What's your family? Do you talk to your family about this? Ship?

872
00:49:51,480 --> 00:49:51,680
Speaker 4: Yeah?

873
00:49:51,920 --> 00:49:51,960
Speaker 3: Do?

874
00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:59,680
Speaker 1: But uh, I feel like that don't really understand a

875
00:49:59,719 --> 00:50:02,279
Speaker 1: lot of what oursers, so I'll just truck it to

876
00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:03,479
Speaker 1: myself a lot of the time.

877
00:50:07,040 --> 00:50:12,160
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm mm hmm, Bro, call a lawyer? Has anyone

878
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:13,600
Speaker 2: else you talk to your friends about this?

879
00:50:15,920 --> 00:50:16,440
Speaker 1: Yeah?

880
00:50:16,480 --> 00:50:17,880
Speaker 2: And what did they say? Did they tell you to

881
00:50:17,920 --> 00:50:18,440
Speaker 2: call lawyer?

882
00:50:20,440 --> 00:50:22,399
Speaker 1: That never said call a lawyer? But I just think

883
00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:23,200
Speaker 1: it's sucked up.

884
00:50:25,360 --> 00:50:30,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, are you gonna call lawyer today?

885
00:50:31,320 --> 00:50:32,560
Speaker 1: I'm gonna call on today.

886
00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:33,840
Speaker 2: Are you gonna call lawyer today?

887
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:37,160
Speaker 1: Because you have told me too? Yeah?

888
00:50:37,280 --> 00:50:42,000
Speaker 2: Okay, thank god? Good? Please please please and be and

889
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:44,840
Speaker 2: tell them everything, tell them like, because because I don't know,

890
00:50:45,040 --> 00:50:47,640
Speaker 2: I can't quell your fears because I'm a gecko and

891
00:50:47,719 --> 00:50:50,959
Speaker 2: I'm I'm a I'm a gecko ten thousand miles away

892
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:54,600
Speaker 2: from you call call a lawyer. Okay. I feel it

893
00:50:54,600 --> 00:50:57,440
Speaker 2: would make it genuinely if you call a lawyer. If

894
00:50:57,480 --> 00:50:59,400
Speaker 2: you call a lawyer and then you d emmulate and

895
00:50:59,440 --> 00:51:01,160
Speaker 2: you're like I called lawyer and he told me all

896
00:51:01,160 --> 00:51:02,600
Speaker 2: the stuff and it made me feel better. That would

897
00:51:02,600 --> 00:51:05,799
Speaker 2: make me very happy. So I hope you do that.

898
00:51:08,360 --> 00:51:16,359
Speaker 2: Marcus Marcus, Marcus, Marcus Marcus Marcus. Mmmm well, all right, man,

899
00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:18,200
Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'm gonna end. I'm gonna end this so

900
00:51:18,239 --> 00:51:20,120
Speaker 2: that you can go call a lawyer. If because I

901
00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:22,719
Speaker 2: because you're probably in your head. If I've convinced you

902
00:51:22,760 --> 00:51:24,560
Speaker 2: to do it, I'm gonna let you do it right now,

903
00:51:28,320 --> 00:51:29,440
Speaker 2: and I'm not gonna break it.

904
00:51:29,800 --> 00:51:32,520
Speaker 1: Any lawyers are off at six, I m uh.

905
00:51:32,520 --> 00:51:35,279
Speaker 2: No, you should go back to bed. Maybe nine. Let's

906
00:51:35,320 --> 00:51:38,040
Speaker 2: go back to bed. Uh Marcus, is there anything else

907
00:51:38,040 --> 00:51:39,440
Speaker 2: you want to say to the people of the computer

908
00:51:39,520 --> 00:51:40,080
Speaker 2: before we go?

909
00:51:45,880 --> 00:51:48,920
Speaker 1: I didn't think about that one. It's fun if I

910
00:51:48,960 --> 00:51:50,840
Speaker 1: don't have anything to say.

911
00:51:51,360 --> 00:51:55,000
Speaker 2: Of course it's fine. Yeah, it's fine. Of course it's fine.

912
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:58,480
Speaker 2: You don't have to have anything to say. Okay, just

913
00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:01,200
Speaker 2: go call a lawyer. I somebody give me account of

914
00:52:01,200 --> 00:52:02,840
Speaker 2: how many times I said that over the course of

915
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:08,760
Speaker 2: this uh phone call. Okay, good good luck, Marcus.

916
00:52:09,520 --> 00:52:14,080
Speaker 1: Thanks, I appreciate it, all right, take care of him.

917
00:52:14,080 --> 00:52:17,040
Speaker 2: Man. I don't know what that is. I don't know

918
00:52:17,040 --> 00:52:20,560
Speaker 2: what that is. Is that like a low is it

919
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:22,080
Speaker 2: like a low self esteem thing?

920
00:52:22,360 --> 00:52:22,480
Speaker 4: Like?

921
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:25,239
Speaker 2: What is I like, what is it that is preventing

922
00:52:26,040 --> 00:52:30,719
Speaker 2: this gentleman from calling a lawyer? Shit, dude, That's what

923
00:52:30,760 --> 00:52:32,680
Speaker 2: I would do if I was in a situation like that.

924
00:52:33,800 --> 00:52:38,680
Speaker 2: I mean, I mean damn, because he's just yeah, all this,

925
00:52:38,760 --> 00:52:45,960
Speaker 2: all this stuff that he's talking about. You know, it's

926
00:52:45,960 --> 00:52:49,680
Speaker 2: so funny that there's an entire like this is so dumb.

927
00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:53,440
Speaker 2: But it's crazy to me that there's a whole continent

928
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:56,880
Speaker 2: of other of people who have that accent, like the

929
00:52:56,920 --> 00:52:58,680
Speaker 2: law Like, if he calls a lawyer, the lawyer is

930
00:52:58,680 --> 00:53:01,120
Speaker 2: gonna like be like an Australia and he's gonna talk,

931
00:53:01,160 --> 00:53:04,920
Speaker 2: He's gonna have that accent. The boss who's fucking them

932
00:53:04,960 --> 00:53:08,920
Speaker 2: over has an accent. The guy the person who gave that.

933
00:53:09,120 --> 00:53:11,120
Speaker 2: All the doctors they have that accent. That's kind of

934
00:53:11,120 --> 00:53:15,680
Speaker 2: crazy to me. Hello, Hey, what's up? What's your name?

935
00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:18,600
Speaker 2: My name is May May. What's up?

936
00:53:18,640 --> 00:53:18,799
Speaker 1: May?

937
00:53:18,840 --> 00:53:19,600
Speaker 2: How's life.

938
00:53:21,560 --> 00:53:25,800
Speaker 4: Crazy? Just finished my finals? So next pustential crisis?

939
00:53:26,480 --> 00:53:29,719
Speaker 2: Why Why is finishing your finals giving you an existential crisis?

940
00:53:30,880 --> 00:53:36,600
Speaker 4: Well, honestly, I'm just scared of the adult world. Like

941
00:53:37,000 --> 00:53:39,799
Speaker 4: it's just the main reason. Like I just finished neuroscience,

942
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:43,759
Speaker 4: but now I don't have a job because the job

943
00:53:43,840 --> 00:53:47,560
Speaker 4: applications I applied to just no funding and I just

944
00:53:47,600 --> 00:53:48,200
Speaker 4: got fired.

945
00:53:49,239 --> 00:53:51,600
Speaker 2: Well we oh no, what were you doing before you

946
00:53:51,600 --> 00:53:52,080
Speaker 2: were fired?

947
00:53:54,880 --> 00:53:57,759
Speaker 4: So like a college student but like it's technically not

948
00:53:57,840 --> 00:54:01,920
Speaker 4: a fire, but just got let go after they said like,

949
00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:04,640
Speaker 4: oh yeah, we can't hire you anymore, so we got

950
00:54:04,640 --> 00:54:06,319
Speaker 4: to let you go. And I'm like, but you didn't

951
00:54:06,320 --> 00:54:06,960
Speaker 4: even hire me.

952
00:54:09,800 --> 00:54:12,480
Speaker 2: And what this is? Uh, this is a neuros You

953
00:54:12,560 --> 00:54:15,560
Speaker 2: got a neuroscience degree, yep.

954
00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:18,439
Speaker 4: And and I was looking into like maybe I want

955
00:54:18,480 --> 00:54:24,760
Speaker 4: to do research, but now like honestly yeah, and also

956
00:54:24,960 --> 00:54:28,520
Speaker 4: like a lot of like things happened around me, Like

957
00:54:28,640 --> 00:54:33,399
Speaker 4: neuroscience research is wild. All the research I've been into

958
00:54:33,560 --> 00:54:37,160
Speaker 4: is like the only normal thing I got into children research.

959
00:54:37,680 --> 00:54:39,120
Speaker 4: Every other thing is wild.

960
00:54:39,800 --> 00:54:43,400
Speaker 2: What what tell me about? Tell me about the wild things?

961
00:54:44,840 --> 00:54:50,440
Speaker 4: So like when I when people ask me of like, okay,

962
00:54:50,520 --> 00:54:52,759
Speaker 4: so what are you studying right now? I'm like it's

963
00:54:52,840 --> 00:54:55,319
Speaker 4: kind of like awkward to like explain to them that,

964
00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:57,840
Speaker 4: like it's basically lebotomizing like raps.

965
00:54:59,160 --> 00:55:02,520
Speaker 2: We all know that we no, no, no, look listen, listen, listen.

966
00:55:02,680 --> 00:55:05,239
Speaker 2: May you can, may you can be all KOI on

967
00:55:05,280 --> 00:55:07,080
Speaker 2: this phone call. But we know you guys are sucking

968
00:55:07,160 --> 00:55:10,920
Speaker 2: up some rats. We look, we look, we get we

969
00:55:10,960 --> 00:55:14,280
Speaker 2: get it. We we have all, we have all collectively

970
00:55:14,400 --> 00:55:18,560
Speaker 2: as a society, decided that we can fuck up an

971
00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:22,680
Speaker 2: infinite amount of rats in pursuit of our own in

972
00:55:22,719 --> 00:55:25,719
Speaker 2: pursuit of the furtherance of our own of our own species.

973
00:55:25,920 --> 00:55:29,680
Speaker 4: And we're okay with that degree, Like the degree of

974
00:55:29,719 --> 00:55:32,680
Speaker 4: like fucking up rats. I just thought like, oh, probably

975
00:55:32,719 --> 00:55:36,200
Speaker 4: just animal testing degree, right, Yeah, But I didn't. I

976
00:55:36,200 --> 00:55:39,080
Speaker 4: didn't find not to like shoot up cocaine interrats.

977
00:55:41,840 --> 00:55:44,120
Speaker 2: It's funny because I actually I feel bad for you,

978
00:55:44,160 --> 00:55:46,920
Speaker 2: maybe because we are we're all like I'm sure that

979
00:55:47,080 --> 00:55:49,680
Speaker 2: my daily I'm sure that there are so many aspects

980
00:55:49,719 --> 00:55:53,160
Speaker 2: of my daily life that are the way they are

981
00:55:53,360 --> 00:55:57,360
Speaker 2: because of lots of people killing lots of rats. But

982
00:55:57,480 --> 00:56:00,319
Speaker 2: I'm what, I'm lucky because I don't have to. I'm

983
00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:02,200
Speaker 2: not the one who has to kill the rats and

984
00:56:02,600 --> 00:56:04,080
Speaker 2: you're the one who has.

985
00:56:05,120 --> 00:56:08,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, so like like one good like I think, like

986
00:56:08,719 --> 00:56:11,520
Speaker 4: one good thing like that probably like I was like, yeah,

987
00:56:11,560 --> 00:56:13,879
Speaker 4: I didn't like it was my calling to end up here?

988
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:17,880
Speaker 4: Is like sure, I don't like like animost like I

989
00:56:18,160 --> 00:56:21,640
Speaker 4: find man was cute. It's just like I don't every

990
00:56:21,680 --> 00:56:24,279
Speaker 4: single time when someone's like, oh, a dog, it's kind

991
00:56:24,320 --> 00:56:26,799
Speaker 4: of like, okay, yeah it's a dog, but like I

992
00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:28,719
Speaker 4: still kind of feel bad. So it's kind of like

993
00:56:29,600 --> 00:56:31,800
Speaker 4: a lot of people are like yeah, we like even

994
00:56:31,840 --> 00:56:35,600
Speaker 4: my mom like and my brother, they're like, yeah, if

995
00:56:35,640 --> 00:56:38,319
Speaker 4: you didn't get a degree and something weird, like we

996
00:56:38,440 --> 00:56:42,960
Speaker 4: expected you to go into the military or some kind

997
00:56:43,000 --> 00:56:47,400
Speaker 4: of like or like she just she literally just like

998
00:56:47,440 --> 00:56:49,600
Speaker 4: told me like, if you don't end up a serial killer,

999
00:56:49,680 --> 00:56:51,880
Speaker 4: like I'm just happy for you, preferably a doctor.

1000
00:56:55,080 --> 00:56:57,359
Speaker 2: Okay, so you've been lobotomizing rats for.

1001
00:56:59,280 --> 00:57:02,880
Speaker 4: Four years, Like I just dipped because like levant like

1002
00:57:03,239 --> 00:57:07,239
Speaker 4: the lab, They're like they're sure, like they just do

1003
00:57:07,880 --> 00:57:10,520
Speaker 4: weird things, but there's snobby about it. So like I

1004
00:57:10,640 --> 00:57:13,640
Speaker 4: ended up in like children research, which but what I

1005
00:57:13,680 --> 00:57:16,920
Speaker 4: still do is kind of weird because I just put

1006
00:57:16,920 --> 00:57:21,600
Speaker 4: electrodes on kids' heads, like and I call parents saying like, hey,

1007
00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:25,520
Speaker 4: can we have your child please? And like at first,

1008
00:57:25,560 --> 00:57:27,800
Speaker 4: like I was questioning like why they chose me until

1009
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:30,560
Speaker 4: they got into recruitment process and I'm like, oh yeah,

1010
00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:34,600
Speaker 4: like with them for the first four minutes, I need

1011
00:57:34,640 --> 00:57:36,840
Speaker 4: to like explain to them what I'm why I'm calling

1012
00:57:36,960 --> 00:57:41,760
Speaker 4: for their children. Like I just go down and email

1013
00:57:41,840 --> 00:57:44,439
Speaker 4: list and like phone list and I just call every

1014
00:57:44,520 --> 00:57:48,000
Speaker 4: parent and I'm like, okay, yeah, they're they're not going

1015
00:57:48,040 --> 00:57:53,080
Speaker 4: to like find like a young girl or like young

1016
00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:58,920
Speaker 4: college students suspicious there, So why uh not?

1017
00:57:59,040 --> 00:58:02,520
Speaker 2: Why what what if you could like do anything with

1018
00:58:02,680 --> 00:58:04,040
Speaker 2: this degree, what would you do?

1019
00:58:07,960 --> 00:58:08,200
Speaker 1: Well?

1020
00:58:08,240 --> 00:58:12,680
Speaker 4: Like recently I figured out like I really like machines

1021
00:58:14,080 --> 00:58:19,120
Speaker 4: and working with animals, Like not like I like animals,

1022
00:58:19,120 --> 00:58:21,760
Speaker 4: but it's kind of like I don't like talking to

1023
00:58:21,840 --> 00:58:29,560
Speaker 4: people honestly, Like kids, I can deal because like, well

1024
00:58:29,560 --> 00:58:32,000
Speaker 4: they're not as complicated as adults, but like a lot

1025
00:58:32,040 --> 00:58:35,520
Speaker 4: of things happened in my life that I just want like, yeah,

1026
00:58:35,680 --> 00:58:43,120
Speaker 4: no humanity stocks. Like the reason oh yeah, I remember.

1027
00:58:43,200 --> 00:58:48,360
Speaker 4: The reason why I called you is because, yeah, what

1028
00:58:48,560 --> 00:58:51,000
Speaker 4: is happening to the guys around me are like at

1029
00:58:51,080 --> 00:58:53,920
Speaker 4: least like men in the society, because like I'm not

1030
00:58:53,960 --> 00:59:01,360
Speaker 4: going to sound like Missandress, but come on, like like

1031
00:59:01,360 --> 00:59:04,080
Speaker 4: like my guy friend of like eight years, like when

1032
00:59:04,080 --> 00:59:05,920
Speaker 4: I was like talking about like, hey, I don't have

1033
00:59:05,960 --> 00:59:09,120
Speaker 4: a job, like but I still don't really want to

1034
00:59:09,160 --> 00:59:11,880
Speaker 4: go into the military yet. And I was like, well,

1035
00:59:12,440 --> 00:59:15,680
Speaker 4: like as a half joke, I said, like, I mean

1036
00:59:15,760 --> 00:59:18,720
Speaker 4: like Instagram is like either like pushing me towards the

1037
00:59:18,760 --> 00:59:20,960
Speaker 4: sugar baby or like the military, which I was the

1038
00:59:21,000 --> 00:59:23,919
Speaker 4: same thing. And like after we like we just talked

1039
00:59:23,920 --> 00:59:26,640
Speaker 4: for like two hours, and we like I just had

1040
00:59:26,640 --> 00:59:28,200
Speaker 4: a beer and I was like, well, I'm not going

1041
00:59:28,240 --> 00:59:33,520
Speaker 4: to get drunk, so like, oh screw that. So I

1042
00:59:33,560 --> 00:59:36,000
Speaker 4: talked to him and like at the end of the conversation,

1043
00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:38,960
Speaker 4: the two hour conversation, he wasn't acting weird. He suddenly

1044
00:59:39,000 --> 00:59:41,400
Speaker 4: goes into his room and said, like wait here, and

1045
00:59:41,480 --> 00:59:44,440
Speaker 4: he pulls out a wat of cash and said like here,

1046
00:59:44,440 --> 00:59:47,480
Speaker 4: and I'm like I was in denial, but turns out

1047
00:59:47,520 --> 00:59:50,760
Speaker 4: I was solicited and I was like, yeah, no, fuck that.

1048
00:59:53,640 --> 00:59:58,800
Speaker 2: We he pulled out a lot of cash to like.

1049
00:59:58,840 --> 01:00:01,840
Speaker 4: Yeah before that, before that, like I was on the

1050
01:00:01,840 --> 01:00:03,640
Speaker 4: phone call with him and I was like, hey, you're

1051
01:00:03,640 --> 01:00:06,040
Speaker 4: doing okay, Like you had a rough patch with your

1052
01:00:06,040 --> 01:00:08,760
Speaker 4: girlfriend and like he had a toxic relationship and I

1053
01:00:08,800 --> 01:00:13,680
Speaker 4: was like, yeah, no, that's fucking toxic, Like you really

1054
01:00:13,680 --> 01:00:15,440
Speaker 4: want to go down this road. And I was like,

1055
01:00:15,480 --> 01:00:17,600
Speaker 4: I didn't say leave her, but it's kind of like

1056
01:00:17,920 --> 01:00:21,840
Speaker 4: it was even obvious to me that I was like, yeah,

1057
01:00:22,360 --> 01:00:26,720
Speaker 4: that's not good. And I don't know what an infinitus

1058
01:00:26,840 --> 01:00:30,560
Speaker 4: with him just decided to like he said like, yeah,

1059
01:00:30,560 --> 01:00:33,120
Speaker 4: I just found like cash in my room, and I

1060
01:00:33,200 --> 01:00:36,680
Speaker 4: was like he was talking about getting something nice and

1061
01:00:36,880 --> 01:00:41,360
Speaker 4: I'm like no, So I ended up cutting contest.

1062
01:00:42,920 --> 01:00:44,600
Speaker 2: Well, how you said you knew this guy for like

1063
01:00:44,760 --> 01:00:47,880
Speaker 2: eight years.

1064
01:00:46,640 --> 01:00:50,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, since like I don't know, like high school, like

1065
01:00:50,720 --> 01:00:53,920
Speaker 4: I actually come from like like I went to school

1066
01:00:53,920 --> 01:00:57,400
Speaker 4: in Japan for and like since my both of my

1067
01:00:57,440 --> 01:01:01,120
Speaker 4: parents were military, we moved around so like when I

1068
01:01:01,160 --> 01:01:03,000
Speaker 4: first got here, he was one of the first few

1069
01:01:03,080 --> 01:01:05,680
Speaker 4: friends I made. So they kind of stink.

1070
01:01:07,160 --> 01:01:07,520
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.

1071
01:01:08,680 --> 01:01:12,920
Speaker 4: So, but like, strangely enough, I don't feel sad, like

1072
01:01:14,960 --> 01:01:19,480
Speaker 4: it's kind of like, well, it's just probably the people

1073
01:01:19,480 --> 01:01:23,000
Speaker 4: I knew throughout my life, because like, yeah, like I've

1074
01:01:23,000 --> 01:01:27,280
Speaker 4: been robbed by like close people, almost got like a

1075
01:01:27,400 --> 01:01:30,840
Speaker 4: murder attempt on my life while getting my degree, and

1076
01:01:33,200 --> 01:01:35,880
Speaker 4: like I did work at like a dental office where

1077
01:01:35,880 --> 01:01:38,360
Speaker 4: I'm like a random guy walks in and said like, yeah,

1078
01:01:38,400 --> 01:01:40,840
Speaker 4: I just got stabbed the other day. I'm like, oh, yeah, sure,

1079
01:01:41,080 --> 01:01:42,919
Speaker 4: should I just pull the back like see a little

1080
01:01:42,920 --> 01:01:46,640
Speaker 4: bit back slower and I'm not crazy things happened, and

1081
01:01:46,760 --> 01:01:50,080
Speaker 4: I'm like, well, should have soon that coming.

1082
01:01:53,200 --> 01:01:53,600
Speaker 2: Hm hmm.

1083
01:01:54,840 --> 01:01:59,680
Speaker 4: Yeah. So like I don't want to think that like

1084
01:01:59,680 --> 01:02:02,760
Speaker 4: like or like, oh you're crazy, but I'm like, okay, yeah,

1085
01:02:02,800 --> 01:02:05,560
Speaker 4: but you guys have problems too, So at least I'm

1086
01:02:05,960 --> 01:02:07,680
Speaker 4: upfront about mine.

1087
01:02:08,600 --> 01:02:11,840
Speaker 2: Why who's telling you that you're crazy? And why why

1088
01:02:11,840 --> 01:02:16,240
Speaker 2: are they saying you're crazy? Well?

1089
01:02:16,720 --> 01:02:23,240
Speaker 4: My brother, but my brother is he like I just

1090
01:02:23,400 --> 01:02:26,560
Speaker 4: like I usually joke about it, but like, yeah, sure,

1091
01:02:26,640 --> 01:02:31,600
Speaker 4: like we went through the same ship because like, honestly,

1092
01:02:31,720 --> 01:02:36,200
Speaker 4: my both of our like our parents were like did

1093
01:02:36,240 --> 01:02:39,959
Speaker 4: not have a good time a lot. So he looks

1094
01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:45,160
Speaker 4: at me and looking at me like I'm like nonchalant

1095
01:02:45,160 --> 01:02:53,680
Speaker 4: about it, and he's like, yeah, so, uh, probably it's

1096
01:02:53,680 --> 01:02:59,080
Speaker 4: just the shenanigans I get into. So yes, like the

1097
01:02:59,120 --> 01:03:02,840
Speaker 4: moment I told him like, so another thing is like

1098
01:03:05,040 --> 01:03:08,320
Speaker 4: actually like probably like the first time I was deciding

1099
01:03:08,400 --> 01:03:11,320
Speaker 4: like I wanted to call you, was like I think

1100
01:03:11,440 --> 01:03:15,600
Speaker 4: last year fall, but I'm just going to bring up

1101
01:03:15,640 --> 01:03:20,000
Speaker 4: this now. But so I was on a research lab

1102
01:03:20,040 --> 01:03:22,880
Speaker 4: and I was like, hey, this is actually kind of fun.

1103
01:03:22,960 --> 01:03:25,640
Speaker 4: But turns out I don't know why my supervisor hated me.

1104
01:03:26,440 --> 01:03:29,200
Speaker 4: So I got fired. But like I thought, I made

1105
01:03:29,240 --> 01:03:32,160
Speaker 4: a friend. Then that friend went off to the deep

1106
01:03:32,240 --> 01:03:37,400
Speaker 4: end because like she was on some substances and like

1107
01:03:37,600 --> 01:03:40,200
Speaker 4: tried to run a sixty in the middle of the

1108
01:03:40,240 --> 01:03:41,840
Speaker 4: mountains and I was like, oh.

1109
01:03:41,960 --> 01:03:44,160
Speaker 2: Try to try to run. Try to run a what.

1110
01:03:45,800 --> 01:03:48,840
Speaker 4: Like a sixty like sixty miles per hour on like

1111
01:03:48,920 --> 01:03:52,640
Speaker 4: a mountain, like a dirt road, and I was just

1112
01:03:52,680 --> 01:03:59,040
Speaker 4: sitting there of like yeah, shee you and she just

1113
01:03:59,120 --> 01:04:01,680
Speaker 4: yelled at me to get off. So like yes, I

1114
01:04:02,040 --> 01:04:04,440
Speaker 4: call the counseling services and say like, hey, this girl's

1115
01:04:04,480 --> 01:04:07,240
Speaker 4: going off to deep and get her to my school

1116
01:04:07,280 --> 01:04:11,200
Speaker 4: because we went to the same school, so I was like, yeah,

1117
01:04:11,320 --> 01:04:14,240
Speaker 4: like getting my degree is I'm not cost my wife,

1118
01:04:15,880 --> 01:04:20,360
Speaker 4: but hey, something happens. I guess.

1119
01:04:22,200 --> 01:04:22,880
Speaker 2: How old are you?

1120
01:04:22,880 --> 01:04:26,600
Speaker 4: May twenty three?

1121
01:04:27,120 --> 01:04:31,640
Speaker 2: Okay, and you're just you're graduating. Well yeah, okay, it's

1122
01:04:31,720 --> 01:04:35,320
Speaker 2: it's it's May, so you're graduating.

1123
01:04:35,760 --> 01:04:42,040
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, okay. So but at least on the bright side,

1124
01:04:44,240 --> 01:04:46,800
Speaker 4: I got a good GPA and graduating.

1125
01:04:46,240 --> 01:04:52,680
Speaker 2: So for me, hooray for fucking sure. Are you do

1126
01:04:52,720 --> 01:04:53,720
Speaker 2: you have like a I mean, like, do you have

1127
01:04:53,760 --> 01:04:56,000
Speaker 2: like a guidance counselor at the school who's like, Yo,

1128
01:04:56,080 --> 01:04:57,520
Speaker 2: here's how we're gonna help you get a job.

1129
01:04:58,760 --> 01:05:01,200
Speaker 4: Oh no, they see me, like they see me so

1130
01:05:01,200 --> 01:05:04,880
Speaker 4: many times, like they like, actually, like the guidance councilor

1131
01:05:04,880 --> 01:05:07,760
Speaker 4: I need to like contact all the science major kids

1132
01:05:08,320 --> 01:05:10,760
Speaker 4: because my school is a small school, so they and

1133
01:05:11,200 --> 01:05:14,960
Speaker 4: like actually like a private so they want everybody to

1134
01:05:15,160 --> 01:05:17,120
Speaker 4: like especially like get out with a job or at

1135
01:05:17,240 --> 01:05:20,720
Speaker 4: least with a job. So like they're like trying to

1136
01:05:20,760 --> 01:05:23,480
Speaker 4: get everybody to a program. But they're like, well you

1137
01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:25,840
Speaker 4: can gut you guys can contact me for the next

1138
01:05:25,880 --> 01:05:28,600
Speaker 4: five years. So like even they're panicking.

1139
01:05:29,480 --> 01:05:32,320
Speaker 2: I'm sorry they say. They say, they said, if what

1140
01:05:32,400 --> 01:05:34,439
Speaker 2: do you can't contact them for the past five years?

1141
01:05:35,720 --> 01:05:38,640
Speaker 4: Uh no, like the next five years, like I still

1142
01:05:38,640 --> 01:05:41,960
Speaker 4: can use their resources. So they're like, well contact does

1143
01:05:43,160 --> 01:05:47,120
Speaker 4: and my current like supervisor who's like on the research

1144
01:05:47,160 --> 01:05:50,840
Speaker 4: are like saying, hey apply here, hey apply there, and

1145
01:05:51,080 --> 01:05:56,000
Speaker 4: even like I took a gap year. So my friends

1146
01:05:56,120 --> 01:05:58,800
Speaker 4: are trying to like get me into jobs. But I'm like, well,

1147
01:06:01,480 --> 01:06:05,080
Speaker 4: it's just like when things get so bad, it just

1148
01:06:05,080 --> 01:06:09,360
Speaker 4: gets gets absurdly bad, and I'm like, well, I'm actually

1149
01:06:09,480 --> 01:06:10,120
Speaker 4: entertained for.

1150
01:06:10,160 --> 01:06:12,400
Speaker 2: What does he say that one more time?

1151
01:06:13,760 --> 01:06:16,640
Speaker 4: Like when things get so bad, like it just becomes

1152
01:06:16,680 --> 01:06:20,040
Speaker 4: like entertaining at some point, I guess.

1153
01:06:19,480 --> 01:06:23,840
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm mmmm. You have friends who are helping you

1154
01:06:23,840 --> 01:06:29,040
Speaker 2: try to get into jobs. Yeah, who are these friends?

1155
01:06:30,480 --> 01:06:34,840
Speaker 4: Like friends who like graduated like biology and like microbiology,

1156
01:06:34,920 --> 01:06:41,360
Speaker 4: and I feel like the like school friends like I

1157
01:06:41,440 --> 01:06:45,840
Speaker 4: went to school because and alumni, and then there's friends

1158
01:06:45,840 --> 01:06:51,520
Speaker 4: from the high school that I still have contact with.

1159
01:06:51,800 --> 01:06:58,360
Speaker 5: So yeah, that's a yeah, yeah.

1160
01:06:59,160 --> 01:07:02,400
Speaker 2: All all these all these I think all these these

1161
01:07:02,400 --> 01:07:06,600
Speaker 2: are all legitimate yea's, these are all legitimate yea's. Yeah.

1162
01:07:06,640 --> 01:07:10,280
Speaker 4: So it's not like I think like I'm not calling

1163
01:07:10,320 --> 01:07:13,760
Speaker 4: depressed or like calling to cry about something because I

1164
01:07:13,960 --> 01:07:16,360
Speaker 4: legit wanted to cry about something a few months ago,

1165
01:07:16,440 --> 01:07:22,120
Speaker 4: but like now it passed. I'm like, well, yeah, why

1166
01:07:22,120 --> 01:07:27,560
Speaker 4: did that happen? I'm prompted because like people are like

1167
01:07:27,760 --> 01:07:30,200
Speaker 4: people are like I did get asked like, so did

1168
01:07:30,240 --> 01:07:33,640
Speaker 4: you do anything? Like later down the road, like recently,

1169
01:07:33,720 --> 01:07:36,760
Speaker 4: They're They're like, so you did anything, And I'm like, no,

1170
01:07:36,880 --> 01:07:40,600
Speaker 4: I hate touching people, like and giving compliments like I

1171
01:07:40,640 --> 01:07:41,880
Speaker 4: don't know why that happened to me.

1172
01:07:44,080 --> 01:07:45,800
Speaker 2: I'm saying you did anything?

1173
01:07:47,400 --> 01:07:51,040
Speaker 4: Ah yeah, like getting in this much trouble. Like people

1174
01:07:51,080 --> 01:07:54,600
Speaker 4: are like, so you're leading someone on, and I'm like, no,

1175
01:07:55,200 --> 01:07:58,040
Speaker 4: I hate people. I don't mind touching.

1176
01:08:00,320 --> 01:08:00,840
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.

1177
01:08:03,720 --> 01:08:04,120
Speaker 2: Hmmm.

1178
01:08:05,760 --> 01:08:13,040
Speaker 4: So yeah, Like and when I was like shadowing like

1179
01:08:13,200 --> 01:08:16,519
Speaker 4: the only like bright side, like the bright side of

1180
01:08:16,560 --> 01:08:19,880
Speaker 4: like all this like weirdness because I have a lot

1181
01:08:19,920 --> 01:08:25,080
Speaker 4: of weird guy stories, but at least of all the

1182
01:08:25,120 --> 01:08:27,439
Speaker 4: men who hit me, like I did hit way above

1183
01:08:27,479 --> 01:08:32,960
Speaker 4: my tax bracket. So I'm like, hey, like I did

1184
01:08:33,000 --> 01:08:35,280
Speaker 4: pull auseholds, but I did not pull a bum. It's

1185
01:08:35,400 --> 01:08:38,320
Speaker 4: like I joke about people, but I'm like I'm still

1186
01:08:38,320 --> 01:08:38,800
Speaker 4: not dating.

1187
01:08:40,960 --> 01:08:44,240
Speaker 2: You said you said, up, you said you hit above

1188
01:08:44,280 --> 01:08:45,280
Speaker 2: your tax bracket.

1189
01:08:46,400 --> 01:08:49,799
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's all the people who were kind of weird

1190
01:08:50,000 --> 01:08:54,800
Speaker 4: towards me or like there were assholes, but like legitimately

1191
01:08:54,840 --> 01:08:58,760
Speaker 4: but at least, well they made more money than me.

1192
01:08:58,840 --> 01:09:03,120
Speaker 4: So I'm like, hey, at least I pulled someone above

1193
01:09:03,160 --> 01:09:04,479
Speaker 4: my tax brackets. So I'm like.

1194
01:09:06,520 --> 01:09:12,440
Speaker 2: A win, sure, sure, sure, sure anywhen.

1195
01:09:12,400 --> 01:09:17,519
Speaker 4: So it's like, I mean, it's a weird way to

1196
01:09:17,600 --> 01:09:19,639
Speaker 4: like try to find a bright side, but like there

1197
01:09:19,720 --> 01:09:22,240
Speaker 4: is no bright side that like it's just absurd to

1198
01:09:22,280 --> 01:09:25,839
Speaker 4: find like a one. So mm hmm.

1199
01:09:27,600 --> 01:09:30,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, ah man, you know, uh.

1200
01:09:30,920 --> 01:09:33,400
Speaker 4: I like I'm not even in the dating scene, but

1201
01:09:33,600 --> 01:09:35,960
Speaker 4: like people in the dating scene, I just get a

1202
01:09:35,960 --> 01:09:39,200
Speaker 4: little bit worried because if there's there's these weird guys

1203
01:09:39,760 --> 01:09:44,120
Speaker 4: that people find attractive, is kind of like, so why

1204
01:09:45,000 --> 01:09:45,839
Speaker 4: you want to say.

1205
01:09:46,360 --> 01:09:48,960
Speaker 2: I mean, is this something? Is that something that you like?

1206
01:09:48,960 --> 01:09:50,800
Speaker 2: Like I mean the way you're talking about it, I mean,

1207
01:09:50,800 --> 01:09:53,160
Speaker 2: that's is that something that you want is like to

1208
01:09:53,200 --> 01:09:54,000
Speaker 2: be dating? Nope?

1209
01:09:55,000 --> 01:09:59,519
Speaker 4: Nope. Like halfway through college I come from like I

1210
01:09:59,520 --> 01:10:04,800
Speaker 4: figured like I was completely as oh okay, like I

1211
01:10:05,120 --> 01:10:05,799
Speaker 4: dipped out.

1212
01:10:05,840 --> 01:10:10,599
Speaker 2: Like well, I mean that's I will say that is

1213
01:10:10,680 --> 01:10:16,160
Speaker 2: one stressful part of life that I guess you don't

1214
01:10:16,680 --> 01:10:18,840
Speaker 2: have to participate in do you? I mean, how do

1215
01:10:18,840 --> 01:10:20,760
Speaker 2: you How do you feel about that? Do you feel like?

1216
01:10:23,840 --> 01:10:24,240
Speaker 2: Do you do?

1217
01:10:24,360 --> 01:10:24,479
Speaker 1: You?

1218
01:10:24,520 --> 01:10:24,800
Speaker 2: Are you?

1219
01:10:24,880 --> 01:10:24,960
Speaker 1: Like?

1220
01:10:25,320 --> 01:10:29,280
Speaker 2: Is it like a source of internal is maybe kind

1221
01:10:29,280 --> 01:10:30,640
Speaker 2: of personal but like and you don't have to talk

1222
01:10:30,680 --> 01:10:32,400
Speaker 2: about anything you don't want to talk about. But is

1223
01:10:32,439 --> 01:10:36,680
Speaker 2: it like is it like a source of internal conflict

1224
01:10:36,760 --> 01:10:37,000
Speaker 2: for you?

1225
01:10:39,320 --> 01:10:42,760
Speaker 4: M No, Like I still have a fun time like

1226
01:10:42,840 --> 01:10:46,759
Speaker 4: talking to people who are like generally fine, like interesting

1227
01:10:46,800 --> 01:10:52,600
Speaker 4: to talk to and honestly, like I'm thinking, like, is

1228
01:10:52,640 --> 01:10:57,120
Speaker 4: there anything besides in life then alcohol and research, because

1229
01:10:58,479 --> 01:11:03,880
Speaker 4: I guess those things actually bringing joy. I guess we love.

1230
01:11:04,280 --> 01:11:07,080
Speaker 4: I still love talking to people so like, but it's

1231
01:11:07,120 --> 01:11:10,240
Speaker 4: not like this source of stress. Probably the only stress

1232
01:11:10,320 --> 01:11:13,759
Speaker 4: is like a mom's like Japanese, so like every single

1233
01:11:13,760 --> 01:11:16,639
Speaker 4: time I meet her side of the family, they're like, wow,

1234
01:11:16,680 --> 01:11:19,000
Speaker 4: you're so pretty, Like why don't you like get married?

1235
01:11:19,080 --> 01:11:23,559
Speaker 4: And I'm like, yeah, can you can? I can you

1236
01:11:23,640 --> 01:11:25,479
Speaker 4: just send me back to the lab? I don't want

1237
01:11:25,520 --> 01:11:26,639
Speaker 4: to talk to anymore.

1238
01:11:28,479 --> 01:11:32,759
Speaker 2: Mm hmm. May I hope that, uh well, first of all, listen,

1239
01:11:32,800 --> 01:11:37,360
Speaker 2: may I hope was like helpful to or I hope

1240
01:11:37,400 --> 01:11:43,800
Speaker 2: you I hope it was remotely helpful on the phone.

1241
01:11:43,840 --> 01:11:47,520
Speaker 2: I mean, but I also want to say I hope

1242
01:11:48,560 --> 01:11:49,000
Speaker 2: I mean.

1243
01:11:48,920 --> 01:11:52,240
Speaker 4: Like probably like I would want an advice, but like

1244
01:11:52,400 --> 01:11:55,479
Speaker 4: at the same time, like I do know for advice, I'm.

1245
01:11:55,320 --> 01:11:59,840
Speaker 2: Not a sorry, go ahead, you sorry, go aheading just

1246
01:11:59,880 --> 01:12:00,840
Speaker 2: a rupting you what were you saying?

1247
01:12:00,960 --> 01:12:07,400
Speaker 4: It's just like probably half advice, like half question of

1248
01:12:07,439 --> 01:12:12,639
Speaker 4: like why are people so weird like this? Like I mean,

1249
01:12:12,680 --> 01:12:17,040
Speaker 4: like they get weird A doubt that, like like I

1250
01:12:17,160 --> 01:12:19,800
Speaker 4: like the things I do for my like what I

1251
01:12:19,840 --> 01:12:21,640
Speaker 4: want to do for a job, but then they like

1252
01:12:23,000 --> 01:12:25,719
Speaker 4: get weird, and I'm like, so, why you guys weird?

1253
01:12:28,280 --> 01:12:31,400
Speaker 2: I nobody has any fucking answers as to why anyone

1254
01:12:31,479 --> 01:12:33,439
Speaker 2: is the way they are. I mean maybe they do,

1255
01:12:33,640 --> 01:12:38,720
Speaker 2: but yeah, look, I I'll just say this, I hope. Look,

1256
01:12:38,720 --> 01:12:43,200
Speaker 2: it's no fucking secret that you know. I'm uh, have

1257
01:12:43,280 --> 01:12:46,400
Speaker 2: have struggled myself with like negative perceptions of of the

1258
01:12:46,400 --> 01:12:50,559
Speaker 2: world and whatnot, and I'm no, I'm no expert in

1259
01:12:50,640 --> 01:12:54,439
Speaker 2: fixing those things. I don't have any I wish I

1260
01:12:54,479 --> 01:13:03,320
Speaker 2: had anything like inspiring necessarily, but I mean I don't know, Man,

1261
01:13:03,360 --> 01:13:04,479
Speaker 2: do you talk to a therapist.

1262
01:13:07,680 --> 01:13:09,920
Speaker 4: Well I did, but now I'm graduating because I'm going

1263
01:13:09,960 --> 01:13:15,160
Speaker 4: to lose that privilege. Yeah, well, like I still like

1264
01:13:15,240 --> 01:13:17,720
Speaker 4: have people who I can talk to. I guess, so

1265
01:13:17,920 --> 01:13:20,000
Speaker 4: it's not much of a big deal for me or

1266
01:13:20,040 --> 01:13:22,240
Speaker 4: like it's not like oh I'm alone or like I'm

1267
01:13:22,240 --> 01:13:24,880
Speaker 4: going to be sad. But it's still just kind of

1268
01:13:24,960 --> 01:13:27,439
Speaker 4: like the thing that I just accepted I need to

1269
01:13:27,439 --> 01:13:29,920
Speaker 4: deal and why are you I kN.

1270
01:13:31,840 --> 01:13:32,160
Speaker 3: Mhm.

1271
01:13:34,800 --> 01:13:39,000
Speaker 4: But still I'm like like it's kind of like, yeah,

1272
01:13:40,680 --> 01:13:42,720
Speaker 4: I feel it's like I'm kind of uncalled for.

1273
01:13:42,880 --> 01:13:45,719
Speaker 2: I guess what's what's uncalled for therapy?

1274
01:13:48,200 --> 01:13:54,160
Speaker 4: I don't know, like people just I mean my genuine

1275
01:13:54,240 --> 01:13:56,280
Speaker 4: question like after like I didn't think I was going

1276
01:13:56,280 --> 01:14:00,559
Speaker 4: to graduate with the question like why are people so weird?

1277
01:14:00,640 --> 01:14:04,080
Speaker 4: Like sure, like in neuroscience, like you learn about behavior,

1278
01:14:04,200 --> 01:14:11,280
Speaker 4: so and what I figured out was like, yeah, people

1279
01:14:11,280 --> 01:14:14,840
Speaker 4: are weird. And then I learned about like in the

1280
01:14:14,840 --> 01:14:18,920
Speaker 4: field like in neurosense of psychology, everybody's like drugged up,

1281
01:14:21,840 --> 01:14:23,559
Speaker 4: like like like all.

1282
01:14:23,400 --> 01:14:25,680
Speaker 2: The other all the other researchers are like taking a

1283
01:14:25,680 --> 01:14:27,519
Speaker 2: bunch of drugs.

1284
01:14:27,760 --> 01:14:30,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, like that really like one researcher like who I

1285
01:14:31,000 --> 01:14:33,160
Speaker 4: was like working with it. She was like right after

1286
01:14:33,200 --> 01:14:37,479
Speaker 4: a conference, she just like went straight to dispensary and

1287
01:14:37,600 --> 01:14:41,960
Speaker 4: like got gout, like got some weed. And I was like, well,

1288
01:14:42,439 --> 01:14:46,960
Speaker 4: I don't do weeds, but I'm an alcoholic, so I

1289
01:14:47,000 --> 01:14:48,959
Speaker 4: don't do weat And it's just like okay, sure.

1290
01:14:51,520 --> 01:14:58,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean yeah yeah. Self medicating is definitely, it's

1291
01:14:58,200 --> 01:15:02,000
Speaker 2: definitely a thing. Definitely thing I always I always have.

1292
01:15:01,880 --> 01:15:03,559
Speaker 2: I have to imagine. I have to imagine it's kind

1293
01:15:03,560 --> 01:15:07,880
Speaker 2: of interesting like being in the field like neuroscience, where

1294
01:15:08,160 --> 01:15:12,479
Speaker 2: you I assume you have your studying all these things

1295
01:15:12,520 --> 01:15:17,439
Speaker 2: about like fucking like dopamine and serotonin and noah, per

1296
01:15:17,479 --> 01:15:20,800
Speaker 2: nephrine all this, all these like brain chemicals and so

1297
01:15:20,920 --> 01:15:23,680
Speaker 2: you have like a it must be kind of like

1298
01:15:24,400 --> 01:15:29,720
Speaker 2: it must be a psychedelic, bizarre contradict. You no look

1299
01:15:29,960 --> 01:15:32,320
Speaker 2: like like like I've always I've always.

1300
01:15:32,200 --> 01:15:34,800
Speaker 4: People like the old tenures or like the old people

1301
01:15:34,800 --> 01:15:37,519
Speaker 4: who are like have white hair in the field. They're

1302
01:15:37,560 --> 01:15:39,680
Speaker 4: like you think they're going to be the smartest, but

1303
01:15:39,840 --> 01:15:42,080
Speaker 4: like they're the people who were doing it from the nineties,

1304
01:15:42,120 --> 01:15:44,200
Speaker 4: And I'm like, okay, you're worse than us.

1305
01:15:44,640 --> 01:15:46,080
Speaker 2: But I was gonna say it must be kind of

1306
01:15:46,120 --> 01:15:48,840
Speaker 2: weird to like have this logical understanding of how the

1307
01:15:48,840 --> 01:15:53,160
Speaker 2: brain works from like a very very empirical point of

1308
01:15:53,240 --> 01:15:56,920
Speaker 2: view and then still be a fucking slave to it,

1309
01:15:57,080 --> 01:16:00,960
Speaker 2: you know, And then still you do do all this research,

1310
01:16:01,000 --> 01:16:02,960
Speaker 2: you learn about, all the chemicals you learn, and you're

1311
01:16:03,000 --> 01:16:05,080
Speaker 2: still a fucking slave to the thing.

1312
01:16:05,160 --> 01:16:11,559
Speaker 5: It's insane, No, it's it's wild, like at least like

1313
01:16:11,560 --> 01:16:14,000
Speaker 5: like actually, like I got like a work like when

1314
01:16:14,040 --> 01:16:17,320
Speaker 5: I was taking psychopharmacology, which is like basically gay drugs.

1315
01:16:17,360 --> 01:16:20,920
Speaker 4: Like it's a study about drugs. So we had always

1316
01:16:20,960 --> 01:16:23,600
Speaker 4: had like this homework of like where we read like

1317
01:16:23,640 --> 01:16:26,160
Speaker 4: a case study or a prompt about like this person

1318
01:16:26,240 --> 01:16:29,040
Speaker 4: going through something like it could be medical. But like

1319
01:16:29,160 --> 01:16:32,240
Speaker 4: one of the papers where they were like, so this

1320
01:16:32,320 --> 01:16:35,760
Speaker 4: guy decided to make compound during his chemistry class and

1321
01:16:35,800 --> 01:16:38,639
Speaker 4: decided to use it. Then suddenly his arms and legs

1322
01:16:38,640 --> 01:16:41,400
Speaker 4: won't move. What happened? And I'm like, oh, he's a

1323
01:16:41,439 --> 01:16:50,600
Speaker 4: fucking boy. So I'm like, why did you do that? Guy? So,

1324
01:16:51,240 --> 01:16:53,759
Speaker 4: but like we need to explain like how the dopamine

1325
01:16:53,800 --> 01:17:03,360
Speaker 4: pathway works. And I was like, well, like yeah, may

1326
01:17:04,000 --> 01:17:06,920
Speaker 4: everybody is at last everybody like I can just say

1327
01:17:06,920 --> 01:17:10,439
Speaker 4: it from like a star here, but like looking at people,

1328
01:17:10,560 --> 01:17:12,920
Speaker 4: even like people at regular fields, it's kind of like

1329
01:17:13,120 --> 01:17:15,519
Speaker 4: you're a slave to something. At least make it interesting.

1330
01:17:17,479 --> 01:17:20,080
Speaker 2: You're a You're always going to be a slave to something.

1331
01:17:20,240 --> 01:17:21,479
Speaker 2: At least make it interesting.

1332
01:17:22,479 --> 01:17:22,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, I.

1333
01:17:24,439 --> 01:17:26,840
Speaker 2: Guess that's I guess you are always going to be

1334
01:17:26,880 --> 01:17:29,320
Speaker 2: a slave to some I mean everyone is a slave

1335
01:17:29,360 --> 01:17:31,639
Speaker 2: to like I mean, everyone's a slave to like their

1336
01:17:31,680 --> 01:17:35,960
Speaker 2: own mortality at the end of the day. I mean, actually,

1337
01:17:35,960 --> 01:17:37,600
Speaker 2: maybe that's not true. Maybe you're not a slave to

1338
01:17:37,640 --> 01:17:40,400
Speaker 2: it if you don't fear it or you don't think

1339
01:17:40,400 --> 01:17:40,680
Speaker 2: about it.

1340
01:17:41,000 --> 01:17:43,439
Speaker 4: Yeah, And like I'll be the first to admit, like

1341
01:17:44,280 --> 01:17:49,320
Speaker 4: I like I do take stressful jobs, like the whole thing.

1342
01:17:49,400 --> 01:17:54,200
Speaker 4: Like even during college, I took stressful jobs because I think,

1343
01:17:54,320 --> 01:17:57,040
Speaker 4: like the moment you're about like you feel like you're

1344
01:17:57,080 --> 01:18:00,280
Speaker 4: about to fail, and like you don't, it's like the

1345
01:18:00,280 --> 01:18:02,559
Speaker 4: biggest high I will ever get. It's kind of like, yes,

1346
01:18:03,280 --> 01:18:07,439
Speaker 4: I'm better than It's like so rewarding to me that,

1347
01:18:07,560 --> 01:18:10,080
Speaker 4: Like people are like, so why do you torture yourself?

1348
01:18:10,080 --> 01:18:15,840
Speaker 4: And I'm like, well it makes me feel better about myself. Hmm,

1349
01:18:18,360 --> 01:18:21,200
Speaker 4: Well I find joy in it. So I'm like, and

1350
01:18:21,240 --> 01:18:24,120
Speaker 4: I was like, Hey, I'm actually finding joy and helping people.

1351
01:18:24,560 --> 01:18:30,240
Speaker 2: Good, good, dear God good. Uh. I'm gonna go ahead

1352
01:18:30,280 --> 01:18:33,280
Speaker 2: and be optimistic that you and uh for whatever, for

1353
01:18:33,360 --> 01:18:38,599
Speaker 2: whatever this word fucking means, uh manifest I don't know.

1354
01:18:39,000 --> 01:18:42,120
Speaker 2: I I I predict you'll be able to find some

1355
01:18:43,240 --> 01:18:46,200
Speaker 2: job or or thing or role or whatever the fuck

1356
01:18:46,240 --> 01:18:47,840
Speaker 2: in the world where you can help where you where

1357
01:18:47,880 --> 01:18:51,240
Speaker 2: you feel like you can help somebody.

1358
01:18:51,439 --> 01:18:53,200
Speaker 4: YEP, I hope so too.

1359
01:18:54,080 --> 01:18:56,320
Speaker 2: Who knows, maybe you helped somebody by talking on this

1360
01:18:56,800 --> 01:18:59,519
Speaker 2: show and they're like, oh, okay, I understand. I have

1361
01:19:00,240 --> 01:19:03,160
Speaker 2: or thoughts and at least I'm not alone in my

1362
01:19:03,320 --> 01:19:05,120
Speaker 2: crazy photo thoughts.

1363
01:19:05,760 --> 01:19:08,760
Speaker 4: I mean, like I like pop like pop into like

1364
01:19:08,840 --> 01:19:11,559
Speaker 4: watch your show's time to time, and like people like

1365
01:19:11,640 --> 01:19:15,880
Speaker 4: there are some episodes some like people feel guilt over it,

1366
01:19:15,920 --> 01:19:17,960
Speaker 4: and I'm I'm like, hey, the smartest people in the

1367
01:19:17,960 --> 01:19:20,320
Speaker 4: world actually have the same problems with you, at least,

1368
01:19:20,360 --> 01:19:23,519
Speaker 4: like they're high functioning. Don't feel bad about it.

1369
01:19:25,000 --> 01:19:26,479
Speaker 2: May is there anything else you want to say to

1370
01:19:26,520 --> 01:19:35,320
Speaker 2: the people of the computer before we go, Like, I

1371
01:19:35,479 --> 01:19:35,920
Speaker 2: I like.

1372
01:19:36,160 --> 01:19:42,920
Speaker 4: There's weird jobs around there. I guess probably, Like I

1373
01:19:43,000 --> 01:19:45,840
Speaker 4: just wanted to like ask everybody like, how do you

1374
01:19:45,880 --> 01:19:48,240
Speaker 4: become a decent human being? Because I don't know either.

1375
01:19:53,760 --> 01:19:57,760
Speaker 2: How do you become a decent human being? Well, well,

1376
01:19:57,840 --> 01:20:04,320
Speaker 2: there's no objective, Uh, there is no objective measure of

1377
01:20:04,320 --> 01:20:06,320
Speaker 2: what is a decent human being. I mean there's a

1378
01:20:07,280 --> 01:20:12,200
Speaker 2: there's there's a lot of general consensuses. Humans generally reach

1379
01:20:12,280 --> 01:20:17,960
Speaker 2: the consensus that murdering people is bad, but there is

1380
01:20:18,000 --> 01:20:20,920
Speaker 2: no like, I mean, if it's all chaos, there's no

1381
01:20:21,040 --> 01:20:24,200
Speaker 2: real Well, how do you become a decent human being?

1382
01:20:24,240 --> 01:20:26,400
Speaker 2: I mean, I guess you you in your brain, I

1383
01:20:26,439 --> 01:20:28,559
Speaker 2: guess I guess. I guess you, as an individual, come

1384
01:20:28,640 --> 01:20:33,200
Speaker 2: up with your own definition of what it means to

1385
01:20:33,200 --> 01:20:35,800
Speaker 2: be a decent human being, and then you try as

1386
01:20:35,800 --> 01:20:40,720
Speaker 2: hard as you can within your own primal human limitations

1387
01:20:40,800 --> 01:20:44,960
Speaker 2: to you know, do that. I guess. I guess you

1388
01:20:45,040 --> 01:20:48,680
Speaker 2: kind of form your own fucking thing. And then and

1389
01:20:48,720 --> 01:20:50,599
Speaker 2: the great news is is that if you fuck up,

1390
01:20:52,080 --> 01:20:53,920
Speaker 2: you can just lower your own bar.

1391
01:20:56,880 --> 01:21:01,559
Speaker 4: That's what I think. Yeah, I did not think about that.

1392
01:21:05,960 --> 01:21:07,880
Speaker 2: Well, I don't know, try the best you can.

1393
01:21:07,960 --> 01:21:16,840
Speaker 5: May, Yeah, thank you, man, what a crazy podcast that

1394
01:21:17,000 --> 01:21:17,840
Speaker 5: I'm doing here.

1395
01:21:19,640 --> 01:21:25,200
Speaker 2: That was May, and that was Collette and that was fuck.

1396
01:21:25,280 --> 01:21:28,200
Speaker 2: What was the name of the Australian guy who's gonna

1397
01:21:28,200 --> 01:21:32,840
Speaker 2: who better fucking call a lawyer? He better called they?

1398
01:21:33,000 --> 01:21:38,160
Speaker 2: Was his name? Maverick Josh something like that. Okay, this

1399
01:21:38,200 --> 01:21:41,599
Speaker 2: has been the Therapy getto podcast. Uh, this was a fun,

1400
01:21:42,439 --> 01:21:45,240
Speaker 2: fun This was an engaging episode. I felt very engaged

1401
01:21:45,280 --> 01:21:49,280
Speaker 2: for all these conversations. I hope you enjoyed it as

1402
01:21:49,280 --> 01:21:54,320
Speaker 2: a listener. This was a good so yeah, man, this

1403
01:21:54,400 --> 01:21:57,720
Speaker 2: was a good episode. This was cool. A lot of

1404
01:21:57,720 --> 01:21:59,599
Speaker 2: the time. Man, A lot of the times I sit

1405
01:21:59,640 --> 01:22:02,240
Speaker 2: down to do this and I'm sit down to like

1406
01:22:02,280 --> 01:22:04,280
Speaker 2: do a stream and I'm like, I don't know if

1407
01:22:04,280 --> 01:22:08,479
Speaker 2: I can do this, And then sometimes, you know, shut

1408
01:22:08,479 --> 01:22:10,519
Speaker 2: the laptop off and I'm like, wow, that was actually

1409
01:22:11,120 --> 01:22:14,160
Speaker 2: that was a good episode. Those were some Those were

1410
01:22:14,200 --> 01:22:20,360
Speaker 2: some engaging conversations. Uh, this is one of them. Thanks

1411
01:22:20,360 --> 01:22:24,519
Speaker 2: for being along on the journey. Crazy Planet. We're living

1412
01:22:24,560 --> 01:22:27,800
Speaker 2: on crazy planet. I don't have anything else to say.

1413
01:22:28,439 --> 01:22:31,519
Speaker 2: The vivance hasn't hasn't worn off yet, so I'm gonna

1414
01:22:31,560 --> 01:22:36,280
Speaker 2: go I don't want to do a push up or something,

1415
01:22:37,520 --> 01:22:41,000
Speaker 2: and that's it. I don't have anything else to say.

1416
01:22:41,120 --> 01:22:45,240
Speaker 2: Do I have anything else to say, I don't know.

1417
01:22:45,320 --> 01:22:47,599
Speaker 2: I want to make more YouTube video that YouTube video

1418
01:22:47,600 --> 01:22:51,400
Speaker 2: that I posted on Sunday, which you can find on

1419
01:22:51,439 --> 01:22:54,320
Speaker 2: my YouTube channel YouTube dot com slash Lyle Forever. I

1420
01:22:54,320 --> 01:22:56,160
Speaker 2: want to make more stuff like that. I want to

1421
01:22:56,200 --> 01:22:58,880
Speaker 2: make more stuff. I want to do more things. I

1422
01:22:58,920 --> 01:23:03,799
Speaker 2: want to be alive. I wanna I want to continue

1423
01:23:03,840 --> 01:23:10,479
Speaker 2: to want. I wanna continue to feel and think and

1424
01:23:10,520 --> 01:23:16,400
Speaker 2: not you know, be okay, just be okay, enjoy life,

1425
01:23:17,880 --> 01:23:24,320
Speaker 2: look at stuff, eat things. We're okay, everything's all right, okay.

1426
01:23:25,240 --> 01:23:30,120
Speaker 2: End of podcast goes on the line taking your phone

1427
01:23:30,120 --> 01:23:31,080
Speaker 2: calls every night.

1428
01:23:31,439 --> 01:23:33,320
Speaker 1: The beacon goes to it and ride.

1429
01:23:33,400 --> 01:23:34,799
Speaker 2: You're just teaching you a loud.

1430
01:23:34,600 --> 01:23:35,719
Speaker 4: In the of your life.

1431
01:23:36,000 --> 01:23:38,160
Speaker 2: But he's not read me an expert