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Speaker 1: This is okay.

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Speaker 2: Ope, I'm Samuel Daughter and I'm John Fry and we

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Speaker 2: tell the funniest stories on the internet.

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Speaker 3: Samuel, John, I think we've turned on the anti gravity

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Speaker 3: story machine.

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Speaker 4: Oh John, hold on, whoa sam No, I believe if

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Speaker 4: you can't, if you're on the podcast, you can't see

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Speaker 4: I am.

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Speaker 1: I am and levitating. I don't know what's gonna happen. John,

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Speaker 1: Just tell me a story to bring me back down

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Speaker 1: to earth.

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Speaker 5: Okay, I got it. Please, Yes, I have a story.

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Speaker 5: It's a great one, really spicy title.

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Speaker 1: It's beautiful. Okay, thank god.

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Speaker 5: I feel.

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Speaker 1: In my body.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I feel ready to weigh down. And that's all

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Speaker 2: just scary dude, anti gravity no joke, it's no joke.

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Speaker 3: And guys, I'm sorry. We told stories out of this world.

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Speaker 3: But we we we made it work.

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Speaker 1: We always make a doer.

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Speaker 5: And with that, I have another story that's out of

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Speaker 5: this world.

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Speaker 1: Oh please do tell my friend, do tell.

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Speaker 3: I told my son I'd rather have his ex wife

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Speaker 3: as my child.

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Speaker 5: And then I cut him out of my will.

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Speaker 6: Uh there, But that's so that's so much, so mean,

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Speaker 6: like this nice.

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Speaker 5: Always grabbing net, stupid kala, stupid son.

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Speaker 1: Hey, hey, Charles, don't listen to.

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Speaker 3: Your koala is getting nothing in my will? Do you

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Speaker 3: understand me?

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Speaker 2: He's Charles. I'm leaving everything to Charles. Charles. The Koala.

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Speaker 5: People love Charles.

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Speaker 3: Actually, there's always there's always a few people that are

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Speaker 3: like they'll be like, oh my my my sister.

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Speaker 2: Had one when growing up or something. Charles is a

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Speaker 2: family heirloom. Oh really from Australia, right, from Australia, years,

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Speaker 2: decades century. Is back AnyWho? They thank you, Charles, thank you.

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Speaker 2: I will take it from here, all right, go back

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Speaker 2: on your perch.

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Speaker 3: So, sixteen years ago, my son Matthew had a daughter

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Speaker 3: with his now ex wife, Josie.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I'm following. I'm following.

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Speaker 2: Yeah wait, like you know the meme where it's like right, yeah, alls,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, ex wife daughter, all right, I'm following.

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Speaker 1: Are we got it here? We are?

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Speaker 3: I've always thought of Josie as my own daughter. So

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Speaker 3: when they divorced seven years ago due to my son cheating,

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Speaker 3: I was conflicted and disappointed.

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Speaker 2: Oh okay, this is this is this is the mom

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Speaker 2: mom of the seating sun who.

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Speaker 1: Was cheating, who now is an ex wife.

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Speaker 3: I also thought it was a dad for some reason,

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Speaker 3: but it is not. Josie wasn't particularly close with any

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Speaker 3: of her own family, so my husband and I naturally

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Speaker 3: took them in. Josie was an angel, and she had

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Speaker 3: insisted that we didn't have to lift a finger any

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Speaker 3: more than before now that we had moved in, and

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Speaker 3: though she was hurt, she kept it civil around Matthew.

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Speaker 2: Wow, that's that's really mature. Seriously, that takes a lot.

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Speaker 2: My husband and I held a huge hand in raising

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Speaker 2: their daughter, Ruth, because Matthew remarried less than a year

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Speaker 2: later and now has a four year old son after

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Speaker 2: disowning Ruth. Disowning Bro Like, I just don't understand.

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Speaker 3: Wow, Like I'm almost like I'm almost like logically, if

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Speaker 3: you're just like disowning your children, then like why would

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Speaker 3: you like a new child any more than like the

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Speaker 3: last one?

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Speaker 5: Like, oh my.

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Speaker 2: God, Like that's just such a crappy thing to do.

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Speaker 2: Those parents must feel so terrible. They're like, fuck, what

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Speaker 2: do we do? Like like yeah, damn, what do we

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Speaker 2: do wrong to raise such a morally bankrupt child?

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Speaker 3: And imagine being in that position as like the grandparents,

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Speaker 3: You're like gosh, like I you know, you can't just

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Speaker 3: stand by.

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Speaker 2: Imagine Josie too. At least at least she has the

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Speaker 2: support of her parents.

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Speaker 5: That's true. That's true.

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Speaker 3: Two years ago, my husband was diagnosed with lung cam answer,

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Speaker 3: which was very hard for everyone, especially Ruth. They were

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Speaker 3: extremely close and she told him about her girlfriends and

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Speaker 3: boyfriends before anyone else. Has always wanted him to be

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Speaker 3: the one to walk her down the aisle at her wedding.

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Speaker 3: Matt rarely ever visited and didn't answer our calls, often

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Speaker 3: saying that we had other kids, so it wasn't like

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Speaker 3: my husband was dying lonely.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, what a terrible kid, like Bro.

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Speaker 5: It just it just it just boggles the mind.

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Speaker 1: Dude.

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Speaker 2: This guy's like, not only is a cheater, but he's

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Speaker 2: a parent deserter bro and just like also an emotionless,

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Speaker 2: just compassionless man.

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Speaker 3: He's just won the Bingo for being the worst human

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Speaker 3: ever heard. Let's your dad die alone? Old bingo? I

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Speaker 3: do Reddit game, it's.

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Speaker 5: Your daughter jack.

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Speaker 1: Now.

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Speaker 3: Last night, though, Matt stopped by to talk about inheritance.

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Speaker 2: When there's money involved, and there's some funny money.

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Speaker 1: Now he's like, oh, you don't have to dialogue and

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Speaker 1: I'll be there.

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Speaker 3: He never mentioned Josie nor Ruth, and hinted that he

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Speaker 3: thought he should get more inheritance than his siblings. The

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Speaker 3: entire discussion what why, like why the worst son ever? Literally,

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Speaker 3: you should get you should get negative money, you should.

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Speaker 5: Get charged for how.

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Speaker 1: Everyone has to deal with your shenanigans.

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Speaker 3: My husband and I shared awkward looks until he decided

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Speaker 3: to cut in. He explained that everyone would get a peace,

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Speaker 3: but he'd focused more on Ruth and Bonnie, one of

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Speaker 3: our other grandkids. Matt got angry and said that Ruth

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Speaker 3: was just his disowned kid and that his son were

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Speaker 3: and that his son deserved more than her. My husband

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Speaker 3: got furious after that and left the room, saying that

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Speaker 3: he wouldn't include Matthew at all in the will.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, honestly that needs some a hard lesson is to

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Speaker 2: become a better.

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Speaker 1: Human that he is being right now.

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Speaker 3: You shouldn't have gotten anything before that discussion.

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Speaker 2: Exactly, Like I feel like all of his actions before

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Speaker 2: should have just taken him out of the will.

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Speaker 5: But disowning daughter alone, like yeah.

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Speaker 2: That one, and cheating disowning it cheating, yes, cheating then disowning.

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Speaker 1: That's come on, whoo.

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Speaker 3: Matt yelled back and turned to me, saying that Ruth

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Speaker 3: wasn't worth it because she'd grow up to be a

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Speaker 3: salute like her mother. You're the one that cheated. Oh

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Speaker 3: my god, this guy is giving me a migraine right now.

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Speaker 2: Wow, the mental gymnastics you have to go through to

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Speaker 2: convince yourself that the person who didn't cheat is the

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Speaker 2: sluty one.

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Speaker 3: You need some sort of like matrix down to convince

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Speaker 3: your brain of this absolute just.

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Speaker 5: Garbage, ridiculous. Now.

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Speaker 3: I told him that I'd rather have her mother as

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Speaker 3: my daughter than him as my son, and insisted he'd leave.

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Speaker 2: Wow, all right, Honestly, that freaking deserves that he does.

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Speaker 2: He does.

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Speaker 5: He needs someone to check him.

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Speaker 2: A burn that's a little, a little precursor the hell

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Speaker 2: that he's going to experience.

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Speaker 5: That's all right, fire and brimstone.

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Speaker 3: His experience in hell is he's locked to he's locked

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Speaker 3: where he can just almost reach his inheritance money, but

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Speaker 3: he can't touch it.

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Speaker 2: Or it's like like he can he can, like as

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Speaker 2: he's about to touch it, it just all burns away.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, or it moves an inch away every time he

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Speaker 3: gets half an inch closer.

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Speaker 1: Every time you're not getting anything.

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Speaker 3: No, I'm getting phone calls from Matt's wife and his

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Speaker 3: family friends saying that my husband and I overreacted and

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Speaker 3: he was just angry that we were playing favorites.

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Speaker 1: I don't know about that.

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Speaker 5: Am I the a hole? And there's an edit.

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Speaker 1: There's an edit, there's an outdate to.

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Speaker 5: Clear some things up. To set the record straight.

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Speaker 1: Set that record straight.

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Speaker 3: Josie did not cheat on Matthew. Josie and Matthew met

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Speaker 3: later in college, and Josie was known as a party

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Speaker 3: girl before that.

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Speaker 5: Ruth isn't the product of some affair.

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Speaker 3: And we are planning on getting a DNA test because

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Speaker 3: what Matthew said has gotten under Ruth's skin so much.

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Speaker 3: She was in the house and overheard the conversation. Oh god,

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Speaker 3: that is so awful.

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Speaker 5: Oh my gosh, poor Ruth.

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Speaker 1: This kid is it's a child, like it's a child.

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Speaker 3: When it came to taking in Josie and Ruth, we

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Speaker 3: did not hesitate one bit because Josie is not from here.

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Speaker 3: She and matt lived in another country until he moved

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Speaker 3: with them here a few months ago before he got

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Speaker 3: caught cheating. Intentions of choosing Josie over Matt then and now,

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Speaker 3: and I've never discouraged Matt from visiting. I tried to

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Speaker 3: make it very clear we're not picking sides. We just

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Speaker 3: wanted her and our granddaughter to be safe and have

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Speaker 3: a good home.

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Speaker 2: I think I'm not out of line when I say

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Speaker 2: Matt is the biggest, fattest, most flappy, gaping a hole

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Speaker 2: I have ever seen in my life.

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Speaker 3: That is an accurate statement. That is, that is not

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Speaker 3: a gaping a.

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Speaker 2: Hole like like like his ale is so a gape

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Speaker 2: that it's like a wizard's sleep.

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Speaker 1: Rapping in the wind.

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Speaker 5: He's an a hole.

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Speaker 3: It's just a myriad of hemorrhoids just flapping together.

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Speaker 2: Is an ale that just has lesions on the side

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Speaker 2: and is bleeding profusely like a volcanic guys into the sky.

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Speaker 5: Oh man, Yeah, this guy is a piece of garbage.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but you know what's never a piece of garbage.

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Speaker 2: Subscribing Okyop Yeah, make sure you subscribe. Follow us on

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Speaker 2: Spotify and support us on Patreon. In the tick Dog

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Speaker 2: in the podcast, support us on Patreon like Kathy Quickly,

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Speaker 2: Keegan Simmons and Desroe Canterbury.

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Speaker 1: Desree Canterbury. We appreciate you, We appreciate you. See us

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Speaker 1: in