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Speaker 1: There's blessing in the breaking, even if it's just road

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Speaker 1: rage as simple as that to maybe losing someone that

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Speaker 1: you love. There is no perfect way to heal.

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Speaker 2: Hey, everyone, welcome back to On Purpose, to number one

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Speaker 2: health podcast in the world. Thanks to each and every

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Speaker 2: one of you that come here every week to become happier, healthier,

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Speaker 2: and more healed. And you know that. I love sitting

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Speaker 2: down with guests who allow us into their lives, who

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Speaker 2: allow us into their journeys to understand more, to help

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Speaker 2: us not feel alone, to help us feel connected in

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Speaker 2: our pain and in our purpose, and to recognize that

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Speaker 2: we have so much more in common and that when

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Speaker 2: we work together we can truly find the light in

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Speaker 2: our lives. Now, today's guest is someone who I believe

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Speaker 2: does this with every step, every word, and everything she

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Speaker 2: takes on in her life. I've had the fortune of

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Speaker 2: getting to know her over the last few years, and

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Speaker 2: I can honestly say that not only is she one

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Speaker 2: of the most genuine and kind hearted people I know,

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Speaker 2: she's also just one of the most loving and soulful

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Speaker 2: people who truly wants to change lives. I have to

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Speaker 2: start the episode by saying this, I believe today's guest

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Speaker 2: is someone who's extremely on purpose. I'm speaking about the

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Speaker 2: one and only Selena Gomez, one of the most globally

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Speaker 2: and culturally celebrated artists, actors, producers, entrepreneurs, and most importantly,

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Speaker 2: I know to her philanthropists of her generation. As a

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Speaker 2: recording artist, Selena has sold more than two hundred and

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Speaker 2: ten million singles worldwide and as over forty five billion

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Speaker 2: global streams. Her upcoming biographical documentary, which I want you

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Speaker 2: to go and see, Selena Gomez, My Mind and Me,

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Speaker 2: is out right now. I got to see it earlier.

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Speaker 2: I'll tell you all about it. And in twenty nineteen,

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Speaker 2: Selila launched her beauty line, Rare Beauty, exclusively with Sephora.

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Speaker 2: As part of the partnership, Gomez announce the Rare Impact

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Speaker 2: Fund pledging to raise This is Outstanding pledging to raise

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Speaker 2: one hundred million dollars for mental health services for individuals

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Speaker 2: in underserved communities. Philanthropy and activism have been key pillars

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Speaker 2: of Selena's career, and she's used her platform to advocate

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Speaker 2: for many important causes. Selena has raised millions of dollars

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Speaker 2: for charity, including Global Citizen and the Lupus Reatus Research Alliance.

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Speaker 2: Please welcome to the show. Selena Gomez, Selena, it is

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Speaker 2: so wonderful to be with you.

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Speaker 1: That was so nice. I felt very like emotional, and

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Speaker 1: I felt so I felt so honored. Thank you for

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Speaker 1: saying those kind words.

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Speaker 2: I meant every word. I think. Whenever I've sat with you,

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Speaker 2: We've always had a conversation about purpose. Ye always had

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Speaker 2: a conversation about service, always had a conversation that's reflective.

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Speaker 2: But I wanted to start with this because we are

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Speaker 2: going to talk about lots of deep and meaningful things today. Yes,

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Speaker 2: but I also wanted to start with this because it's

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Speaker 2: my first memory of meeting you. And you've you've probably

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Speaker 2: forgotten this, but at least for me. Here we go, okay,

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Speaker 2: so you'd come over for dinner. There's the first time

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Speaker 2: we met, and I remember that we were about to eat.

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Speaker 2: My wife had made dinner for us, and we say

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Speaker 2: a prayer before we eat. But the prayer is chanted

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Speaker 2: and sung somewhat in Sanskrit, which is a language that

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Speaker 2: a lot of prayers are in for my practice, and

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Speaker 2: I remember having to do it in front of you,

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Speaker 2: and then after it's opening my eyes and go I

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Speaker 2: just had to sing in front of.

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Speaker 3: Actually, do remember.

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Speaker 1: You were like, I don't know if I should sing

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Speaker 1: in front of you, like please, I thought it was beautiful.

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Speaker 1: I thought it was amazing. And also just to say

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Speaker 1: the food was incredible. I remember that more than anything.

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Speaker 2: I love that well. I wanted to start off by

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Speaker 2: just saying to you that I truly believe that this

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Speaker 2: documentary is so special. Genuinely, it's powerful, it's inspiring, and

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Speaker 2: it's the work that we so deeply need right now.

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Speaker 2: And your voice in the conversation, the global conversation around

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Speaker 2: well being and mental health is the most powerful voice

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Speaker 2: there is. It really is. Thank you, and so when

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Speaker 2: you put out a piece like this and you let

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Speaker 2: us in, it only strengthens the conversation across the world.

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Speaker 2: And that's something that you're doing. So I want to

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Speaker 2: just start off by saying that from the bottom of

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Speaker 2: my heart, I'm so grateful to you.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for saying that. I think that is a

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Speaker 1: huge part of why I decided to release it after

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Speaker 1: having an internal battle, I mean daily at one point

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Speaker 1: maybe I shouldn't do this, Maybe I shouldn't release it,

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Speaker 1: and this is too honest, This is too much of

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Speaker 1: myself until I realized that ultimately it was meant for

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Speaker 1: something bigger. It was just about me, it was about

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Speaker 1: other people, and it took a life of its own

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Speaker 1: and became what it is now, which I'm still nervous about.

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Speaker 1: I'm still anxious about, but I think releasing it is

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Speaker 1: a huge healing, a healing process for me, and it's

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Speaker 1: me letting go of that version of myself.

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Speaker 2: Wow, that's so powerful to hear that. I mean, when

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Speaker 2: I hear you say that that, I feel like you're

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Speaker 2: one of these people that you serve in order to

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Speaker 2: heal and you give in order to let go. And

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Speaker 2: that's such a beautiful cycle because I think often we

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Speaker 2: think when we're going through things that the more insular

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Speaker 2: we go, right, But you're someone who opens up, yeah

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Speaker 2: and says, here it is.

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Speaker 1: I think, you know, being in moments of my life,

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Speaker 1: whether it was my health or personal life, friendships, relationships,

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Speaker 1: I feel like giving myself completely to something is just

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Speaker 1: the best way I can love. But I never wanted

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Speaker 1: the pain that I endured to put some sort of

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Speaker 1: guard on myself and armor, if you will, and I

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Speaker 1: never I never let that happen because I still believe,

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Speaker 1: and I still hope. I hope for love, and I

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Speaker 1: hope for healing, and I hope for change, and I

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Speaker 1: never want to lose that. Of course, there are days

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Speaker 1: where I feel so far away, but I would rather

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Speaker 1: continue to get my heart broken than to not feel

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Speaker 1: at all.

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Speaker 2: That's the greatest sign of strength. I mean, that is

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Speaker 2: such a powerful statement. And I think with a statement

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Speaker 2: like that, you're encouraging so many people to feel heard.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I think most of us feel far away

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Speaker 2: from those things, right, and we're scared to admit that.

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Speaker 2: I mean, you start the documentary with the promise of

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Speaker 2: I'm going to share my darkest secrets. And when I

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Speaker 2: heard that, I thought, wow. I was thinking, Selena, what

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Speaker 2: was Why is that when we share our doc what

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Speaker 2: happens when we share our darker secrets? Not just for you,

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Speaker 2: but for any of us? When you're with your friends,

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Speaker 2: when you're with your families, Like, what does that do?

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Speaker 1: I think at first it's frightening, but I feel like

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Speaker 1: if you surround yourself with people who support you and

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Speaker 1: love you, you have to be careful with who you share

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Speaker 1: your story with. I think that can be dangerous sharing

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Speaker 1: something that maybe was really hurtful. Or sharing a story

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Speaker 1: about your internal struggles to someone who may not be

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Speaker 1: giving you the right advice or guiding you another way

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Speaker 1: that will only lead you to more pain is scary.

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Speaker 1: So first and foremost, I would say making sure you

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Speaker 1: surround yourself with great people, and then I would say,

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Speaker 1: learn everything there is to learn once it's out. Once

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Speaker 1: you say okay, I'm dealing with depression, then find out

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Speaker 1: every single thing you can about what that means. And

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Speaker 1: when you have a relationship with depression as opposed to

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Speaker 1: allow it to keep sinking and inside of you, it's

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Speaker 1: a little bit more freeing. I think. To understand yourself better,

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Speaker 1: I want to know what triggers me. I want to

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Speaker 1: know why I get depressed, and start asking yourself questions

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Speaker 1: to open up yourself instead of you know, it's easier

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Speaker 1: so than done, though, I should say, but instead of

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Speaker 1: you know, keeping it in, I find that the biggest

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Speaker 1: reward is letting it go.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I think there's that statement in the documentary that

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Speaker 2: says you said your mom would always say if you're

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Speaker 2: afraid of something, learned more about it, and then your

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Speaker 2: fear will go away or something. According to those.

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Speaker 1: She definitely did that. When I was younger, I lived

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Speaker 1: in Texas and we were huge with the tornado scene.

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Speaker 1: That was what was happening, and I was terrified. So

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Speaker 1: I would bring like a cross, and I'd bring like

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Speaker 1: a big pillow and I'd lay in my bathtub because

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Speaker 1: that's what I googled is supposedly going to help. And

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Speaker 1: my mom would just kind of smile at me. And

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Speaker 1: she next day, remember, she got me a bunch of

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Speaker 1: books and it was all about thunderstorms and different clouds

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Speaker 1: and formations and all this stuff, and she just told me,

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Speaker 1: She's like, it's not that scary, you know, it's especially

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Speaker 1: when you know that it's just a part of the world.

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Speaker 1: And I guess they are still scary, but now I

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Speaker 1: understand what happens.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, but I love how you're applying that to depression,

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Speaker 2: You're applying that to different things in your life.

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Speaker 1: I completely agree with. I mean, my favorite thing that

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Speaker 1: I say in the documentary is that I have bipolar.

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Speaker 1: I just I learn how to live with it and

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Speaker 1: I just have made it my friend, because that's truly

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Speaker 1: what it can be to me.

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Speaker 2: Now, Yeah, and tell us about that process of when

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Speaker 2: you first discover something like that. Like you said, it's

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Speaker 2: easier so than done. The voices are so loud, there's

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Speaker 2: so much inner judgment, you know, are inner critic is

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Speaker 2: so painful to live with. And now when you're saying,

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Speaker 2: I'm trying to welcome making it a friend, which is

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Speaker 2: a beautiful transition, tell us a bit about that journey

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Speaker 2: of in a critic to in a friend. Well.

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Speaker 1: To be honest, I've been to for treatment centers and

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Speaker 1: I have a lot of opinions on you know, rehabs

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Speaker 1: if you will, or in places to go. There's a

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Speaker 1: lot that I don't agree with. But what I will

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Speaker 1: say is throughout all of it learning lessons through dialectical

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Speaker 1: behavior therapy or cognitive behavioral therapy, there's something that's always

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Speaker 1: been embedded in me throughout all of those different moments

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Speaker 1: in my life, and that was always to recognize when

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Speaker 1: something was happening to me accepting it. And I think

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Speaker 1: once I realized that this was something that wasn't going

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Speaker 1: to go away, This wasn't something that was going to

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Speaker 1: be fixed by going to these places, it was more so,

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Speaker 1: what can I know about myself? Okay? If I kind

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Speaker 1: of go down this road, I'm going to get triggered,

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Speaker 1: and I know that feeling and I know how to

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Speaker 1: avoid it. However, I go to therapy. I also have

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Speaker 1: you know, medication that I fully am on that I

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Speaker 1: believe in fullheartedly, and it helps me stay balanced. But

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Speaker 1: I still have to deal with it, you know. I

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Speaker 1: still have days that are pretty low and moments that

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Speaker 1: I'm just too over the top and I'm like, I

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Speaker 1: want to buy everyone a house and I want to

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Speaker 1: save the world. But I just have learned to kind

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Speaker 1: of understand it. And the best part about that is

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Speaker 1: also my family and friends learning how to live with

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Speaker 1: it too. They can be great friends to me in

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Speaker 1: that way, and that took a lot of time as well.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, No, these are such you know, I know that

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Speaker 2: you do so much work in this space, but today

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Speaker 2: when I'm hearing you share all these insights and they

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Speaker 2: genuinely are insights, they're so powerful because even you just

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Speaker 2: saying like I had to realize that I don't have

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Speaker 2: to fix it, or that it's not going to go away,

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Speaker 2: Like these things make difficult things livable with right, And

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Speaker 2: when we look at the seasons or we look at

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Speaker 2: the weather, it's like, you know, it's going to rain

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Speaker 2: one day, and you know it's going to be dark

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Speaker 2: one day, and you know it's going to be sunny

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Speaker 2: another day. And when you know that, you stop trying

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Speaker 2: to fight it and change it. Yeah, you can accept it,

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Speaker 2: which it sounds from what I'm hearing from you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean it's taken me a long time. It's

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Speaker 1: that's not six years, that's probably ten years in reality.

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Speaker 1: But really it's really been interesting, and I feel better

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Speaker 1: and I feel great now that I can talk about it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, the thing you keep mentioning today is letting go.

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Speaker 2: And I think all of us are trying to know

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Speaker 2: how to let go of old selves, old parts of ourselves,

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Speaker 2: or parts that don't serve us anymore. And I remember

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Speaker 2: when I lived as a monk, some of the areas

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Speaker 2: that we'd live in there were often we'd come across

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Speaker 2: a lot of snake skin, and we'd always use snakes

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Speaker 2: as an analogy of how we leave behind. So snakes

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Speaker 2: don't break out, they don't rip their skin off, they

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Speaker 2: slither out, and their skin just kinds of like falls away,

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Speaker 2: and then we would naturally not find snakes, thankfully, and

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Speaker 2: find the skin. But that analogy always like, really resonated

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Speaker 2: with me. The idea that when we're shedding, when we're

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Speaker 2: letting go, it's not an aggressive process. How did you

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Speaker 2: learn to become compassionate and calmer with yourself because at

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Speaker 2: first we can really feel like we're trying to break

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Speaker 2: something off.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I tend to blame myself when I

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Speaker 1: can't let something go. I feel maybe something is my fault,

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Speaker 1: or I should have done more of this or less

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Speaker 1: of that, and it starts to become, you know, just

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Speaker 1: like a really I kind of turned sad. One thing

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Speaker 1: I've noticed when I watched the documentary back for the

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Speaker 1: first time, I didn't even recognize that girl anymore. And

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Speaker 1: it broke my heart because I was talking about my

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Speaker 1: body and my image and I just hate that I

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Speaker 1: ever felt those feelings. And I think because I have

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Speaker 1: a younger sister, there's been this huge responsibility given to

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Speaker 1: me in a way that has helped me. And I

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Speaker 1: say this about my fans as well, or people that

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Speaker 1: have grown with me. I've almost had to get back

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Speaker 1: up every time, more so for them than myself. And

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Speaker 1: that's something I've learned to really understand. It's healthy to

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Speaker 1: want to be strong for other people, but I needed

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Speaker 1: to recognize I needed to be strong for myself. And

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Speaker 1: that took a while, and it took things like making

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Speaker 1: myself uncomfortable and changing my my thought process, changing the

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Speaker 1: things I watch on TV, changing the music I'm listening to,

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Speaker 1: little things that I can adjust that will perhaps change

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Speaker 1: my mood or make me feel better instead of worse.

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Speaker 2: You know, it is some of these small things, isn't it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I love scary movies, but I can't

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Speaker 1: watch them all the time. I'm like happy, and I'm like, guys,

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Speaker 1: let's watch a scary movie everyone, So why why on

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Speaker 1: earth do you want to do that right now? And

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Speaker 1: you're kind of like, yeah, you're right.

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Speaker 2: Do they manage to persuade you?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, most of the time. But it was Halloween, so

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Speaker 1: I got by way for a few weeks.

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Speaker 2: You did what did you end up? What? Oh?

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Speaker 1: We watched Halloween. We watched Freddy Krueger Nightmare on Elm Street.

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Speaker 2: Which one ruins your mood the worst? Like?

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Speaker 1: Which one makes oh my goodness, probably like hereditary, something

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Speaker 1: really dark? But it was it was fun. It was Halloween.

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Speaker 1: We were just celebrating.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I always call it Cliffhanger chemicals. Oh yeah. I

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Speaker 2: feel like when we watch things that put us in

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Speaker 2: the states of anxiety, yeah, or stress, we release all

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Speaker 2: these Cliffhanger chemeras and now you're like, well, why can't

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Speaker 2: I sleep? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Exactly, why am I having.

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Speaker 2: Rather these like that? So my wife's like that, h

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Speaker 2: she can't. I have to. She always gets really excited

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Speaker 2: to watch things like that. Yeah, I'm like, Raley, we

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Speaker 2: can't do this because you would not let me sleep

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Speaker 2: for the rest of the night. So funny. Yeah, but

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Speaker 2: I think it's really beautiful to hear you said there's

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Speaker 2: these little changes, because I think that's what people feel

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Speaker 2: hardest to change. And I think when I watched the documentary,

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Speaker 2: the greatest challenge you really empathize with is having to

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Speaker 2: do this when every time you're in a car, and

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Speaker 2: then every time you get out the car, there's cameras,

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Speaker 2: there's people, there's opinions, there's you know, that's something very

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Speaker 2: few people can relate to. But I think what's so

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Speaker 2: brilliant about how the documentary's made is that you really

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Speaker 2: feel like we're living that with you. Yeah, and so

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Speaker 2: you're like, wow, even though I can't relate to what

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Speaker 2: Selina is going through. I can understand how it must

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Speaker 2: be really challenging and really stressful. And so what's it

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Speaker 2: like having to deal with all of this that all

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Speaker 2: of us are dealing with too, but you're dealing with

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Speaker 2: it with an added layer of you know, exposure.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. To be honest, I don't know any different. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's what's really scary. Sometimes I think that's really sad,

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Speaker 1: and other times I just think, well, this is what

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Speaker 1: I've been given, and this is the path that I

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Speaker 1: want to continue to walk in. And I know any

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Speaker 1: moment I can, you know, quit and walk away. And

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Speaker 1: you know, that's just not really how I was raised

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Speaker 1: to be. So maybe if it had happened to me

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Speaker 1: later in life, I would have had a different outcome.

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Speaker 1: But because I was raised in and I really had

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Speaker 1: to learn learn the hard way and how to deal

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Speaker 1: with it, on how to not give if you will,

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Speaker 1: that click bait that people want. And I mean I

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Speaker 1: think I do. I do my best to try and

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Speaker 1: eliminate these negative stories or this or other people illustrating

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Speaker 1: my journey. It just I interrupt them with my truth.

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Speaker 1: And that's what I will always continue to do. And

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Speaker 1: that's what this documentary does as well. It's going to

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Speaker 1: be me taking control of my story and no one

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Speaker 1: can change that or say any different.

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Speaker 2: I actually, I'm so glad you addressed that because I've

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Speaker 2: always found that with you, that you always lead with love,

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Speaker 2: even in those areas, and I always am so in

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Speaker 2: admiration of that and in awe of that because I

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Speaker 2: see that whenever there's a narrative, that, whenever there's any narrative,

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Speaker 2: your choice will always be the lead with love and

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Speaker 2: inject love into that and to recaliber. When did you

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Speaker 2: find the strength to start taking control of that narrative,

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Speaker 2: because I think that's an amazing skill that today people

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Speaker 2: need it more than ever. But yeah, when did you

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Speaker 2: start developing the confidence around that needing to do that?

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Speaker 1: I would probably say I started beginning to gain that

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Speaker 1: confidence when I went through a breakup, and that's something

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Speaker 1: that was super public, But all of those things that

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Speaker 1: I had felt so bad about myself and just so

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Speaker 1: terrible every day, I wanted to debunk those feelings. I

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Speaker 1: wanted to take control over that narrative because I did

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Speaker 1: feel that way. But the greatest gift I got from

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Speaker 1: all of that was me actually being honest with people,

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Speaker 1: sharing my story and gaining the confidence to know I

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Speaker 1: am enough and I actually work really hard at being

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Speaker 1: a good person, and I know I'm a great person,

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Speaker 1: and when people paint these unnecessary stories, it actually gives

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Speaker 1: me pleasure to just combat it with love, like you said,

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Speaker 1: or kindness.

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Speaker 3: You know.

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Speaker 1: I think it's it's actually fun for me because it's

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Speaker 1: it is who I am. I don't I can't waste

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Speaker 1: my time if I'm to be honest with everyone in

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Speaker 1: this room, I don't want to waste my time being

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Speaker 1: upset or taking in all of the negative things that

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Speaker 1: I hear online. And I don't even hear it. It's

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Speaker 1: it's just what it gets really bad other people tell me.

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Speaker 1: And then I see in humane things happening and people

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Speaker 1: talking negatively about other women, and it just drives me

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Speaker 1: absolutely crazy. And I think I'll just always be that

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Speaker 1: kind of person. And I would say I'm grateful for

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Speaker 1: my past because it's made me a lot stronger.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, I want I want you to know that,

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Speaker 2: you know, we we see you for that like it

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Speaker 2: is it is. Whenever you do that, I am completely

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Speaker 2: mind blown because it requires so much self assurance. It

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Speaker 2: requires so much commitment to your truth and then also

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Speaker 2: for for everyone else. So thank you so much for

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Speaker 2: leading the way even in that like other thing like no,

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Speaker 2: it's so hard to do, it's so easy to it's

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Speaker 2: so easy to be defensive. And you've found because it's

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Speaker 2: your truth, you've found a way of sharing your truth

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Speaker 2: without making it defensive.

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Speaker 1: Of course, that's I mean, thank you. I don't know

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Speaker 1: if I intentionally do it, but it works really well.

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Speaker 2: So I'm sticking to it. Yeah, stick to it, don't

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Speaker 2: don't change it, Teach it exactly, teach it the new masterclass. Yeah. No,

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00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,880
Speaker 2: Try it now for free at this exclusive web address

434
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Speaker 2: ZipRecruiter dot com forward slash on purpose once again that

435
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Speaker 2: ziprecruter dot com forward slash O n P U r

436
00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:23,320
Speaker 2: p O s E, ziprecruiure the smartest way to hire.

437
00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 2: One of the things that comes through in the documentary

438
00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:30,400
Speaker 2: is we're just getting full access, Like that's what it feels,

439
00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:34,080
Speaker 2: right like full access at all times, and we get

440
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:37,119
Speaker 2: to see all of your relationships, and you get to

441
00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:41,159
Speaker 2: see the relationships that are long term, you get newer relationships,

442
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:43,640
Speaker 2: you get all these different people who are interacting with you,

443
00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:46,760
Speaker 2: and they're interacting with you in every element, Like we

444
00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:48,960
Speaker 2: get to see you straight after an interview, straight before

445
00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:51,200
Speaker 2: an interview, and I could tell there was a time

446
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:55,440
Speaker 2: when you feel a bit of angst because you get

447
00:25:55,480 --> 00:26:00,000
Speaker 2: asked poor questions or like you know, and I could

448
00:26:00,080 --> 00:26:03,200
Speaker 2: see that in you, and that really hit me because

449
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 2: the reason we set up this conversation, this podcast in

450
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:09,440
Speaker 2: the first place was I was hoping that it would

451
00:26:09,440 --> 00:26:11,960
Speaker 2: be a place where people like yourself could share your

452
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:17,120
Speaker 2: true purpose and seeing you share on screen just how

453
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:20,040
Speaker 2: hard it can be to deal with, just does it

454
00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:22,720
Speaker 2: minimize the work you're trying to do. What happens? Tell

455
00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:24,160
Speaker 2: me what happens when you're asked?

456
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:30,920
Speaker 1: I actually just feel it like insulted. Sometimes I sit

457
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:33,840
Speaker 1: in what I work. I mean, I work so hard.

458
00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:36,159
Speaker 1: I love what I do. I love my job. I

459
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:39,520
Speaker 1: love talking about my job. There's different facets of my

460
00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:43,400
Speaker 1: job that I love talking about for different reasons. And

461
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,439
Speaker 1: when I sit down and I have to do press

462
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:50,480
Speaker 1: from you know, starting at eight a m. Till you know,

463
00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:56,040
Speaker 1: whenever the night ends, it's frustrating. You want to spend

464
00:26:56,040 --> 00:27:02,520
Speaker 1: that time talking about meaningful, meaningful moments. And I just

465
00:27:02,760 --> 00:27:06,080
Speaker 1: I wanted that to be in the documentary because I

466
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:09,760
Speaker 1: felt like, I know that a lot of artists, maybe

467
00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:12,960
Speaker 1: not everyone, but I know a lot of artists and

468
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,760
Speaker 1: people in my position feel that way. And I hope

469
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:19,879
Speaker 1: that it will only you know, maybe shift that a

470
00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:24,920
Speaker 1: bit and maybe stop asking people what word you associate

471
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:29,320
Speaker 1: with marshmallow, and maybe ask them how they're doing, you know,

472
00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:32,440
Speaker 1: maybe just having a bit of an inspiration to do

473
00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:36,240
Speaker 1: more and be better and Yeah, it actually is pretty

474
00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:38,320
Speaker 1: crazy because that happens.

475
00:27:38,359 --> 00:27:38,919
Speaker 3: It's weird.

476
00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:43,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, it is really weird. Yeah, and it's interesting because

477
00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,320
Speaker 2: I feel like there's such a trend that's been created

478
00:27:45,359 --> 00:27:49,879
Speaker 2: about asking people clickbaity buzzy, you know, moment questions, and

479
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:52,120
Speaker 2: then you think, well, but this is a human totally

480
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 2: with emotions and ideas and views, and I think often

481
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:58,280
Speaker 2: people think, oh, well, I've only got them for ten minutes,

482
00:27:58,359 --> 00:28:01,360
Speaker 2: I better ask them all this stuff, but you forget

483
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:08,359
Speaker 2: that there's a whole person behind that. The documentarily humanizes you.

484
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:11,280
Speaker 2: What parts of you did? You really want people to

485
00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:14,480
Speaker 2: understand better or see more that you think they haven't

486
00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:15,639
Speaker 2: been able to see over time.

487
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 1: Just I guess where I was meant to be In

488
00:28:20,640 --> 00:28:25,359
Speaker 1: the beginning, it really made me kind of sad. I

489
00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 1: wanted it to be a documentary that was really fun

490
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:34,679
Speaker 1: and about me doing this big tour, and instead I

491
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,680
Speaker 1: felt so bad because we were filming these really intense

492
00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 1: moments and then I had to stop filming. And I

493
00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:45,560
Speaker 1: think I really ultimately wanted people to realize that I'm

494
00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:50,800
Speaker 1: not really that put together. I can be, and I

495
00:28:50,880 --> 00:28:54,360
Speaker 1: feel much better now, but I don't want people to

496
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:56,440
Speaker 1: ever look at me and think she has it all

497
00:28:56,720 --> 00:29:01,080
Speaker 1: and she's figured it out and she is is, you know,

498
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 1: perfect or whatever. I hope no one thinks that, But

499
00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:08,360
Speaker 1: I just don't ever want to be that kind of

500
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:12,000
Speaker 1: public figure. I want to be someone that hopefully could

501
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:17,800
Speaker 1: be a friend, that could just disarm you from the

502
00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:20,560
Speaker 1: celebrity esque part of it. I just want to be

503
00:29:20,720 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 1: someone that people can genuinely walk up to it and say, hey,

504
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:27,480
Speaker 1: I kind of I understand what you walk through. I

505
00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,240
Speaker 1: did too, and have a conversation with.

506
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:32,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, why is that important? Why do you think it's

507
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:36,920
Speaker 2: important that. I guess for a long time your people

508
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:39,960
Speaker 2: did consider celebrity to be perfect, or maybe it was

509
00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:42,480
Speaker 2: portrayed that way. Sometimes maybe it wasn't. But why do

510
00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:44,800
Speaker 2: you think it's important for people to see that no

511
00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:47,680
Speaker 2: one in the world, including me, anyone we're talking about,

512
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:50,080
Speaker 2: there's no one who's perfect. But why is that so important?

513
00:29:50,160 --> 00:29:53,000
Speaker 1: It's important to me because I felt like I had

514
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:56,440
Speaker 1: to be when I was you know, when I was

515
00:29:57,240 --> 00:30:01,640
Speaker 1: going through relationships, I felt like I had to be

516
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:05,160
Speaker 1: a certain way. That's why in twenty sixteen, I was

517
00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:09,840
Speaker 1: talking about my body and talking about my appearance and

518
00:30:09,880 --> 00:30:13,200
Speaker 1: talking about how Oh, everyone's going to see me as

519
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:16,400
Speaker 1: this Disney kid. No one's going to take me seriously

520
00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:22,760
Speaker 1: all of those moments. That's kind of where Yeah, that's

521
00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:24,800
Speaker 1: where all the confusion came from for me.

522
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, no, that does make sense. That's a really

523
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:32,960
Speaker 2: fascinating answer, because yeah, it's almost like you've had to

524
00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:35,920
Speaker 2: live that way. Yeah, and then you're kind of unpacking

525
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:39,760
Speaker 2: it for everyone and breaking down that image that's created.

526
00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:42,960
Speaker 2: And I think that definitely comes across one of the

527
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 2: things that stood out to me in that unpacking of

528
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:51,240
Speaker 2: the perfection element that you're talking about. We're so scared

529
00:30:51,280 --> 00:30:56,840
Speaker 2: of imperfection because it reveals there's parts of us that

530
00:30:57,880 --> 00:31:04,720
Speaker 2: are not ideal by some external comparison or by some

531
00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:09,240
Speaker 2: internal trigger or some past experience where we we have

532
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:12,800
Speaker 2: that feeling. How do you now deal with your imperfections, Like,

533
00:31:12,840 --> 00:31:15,880
Speaker 2: how do you feel about parts of you that are

534
00:31:15,920 --> 00:31:16,960
Speaker 2: not perfect?

535
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:21,800
Speaker 1: I'm okay with that. I actually think a lot of

536
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:26,520
Speaker 1: who I am are just a few things that are

537
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:31,800
Speaker 1: not perfect, even down to my laugh. Sometimes I used

538
00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:35,080
Speaker 1: to be insecure about my laugh, or you know the

539
00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:39,400
Speaker 1: fact that I'll always talk during a movie, or you know,

540
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:44,120
Speaker 1: I always do something minuscule, and I think little things

541
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:49,840
Speaker 1: like that make me happy because I feel like everybody

542
00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:52,400
Speaker 1: else in the world, you know, recent for example, a

543
00:31:52,520 --> 00:31:56,880
Speaker 1: very small example, but Halloween, I was a banana and

544
00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:01,360
Speaker 1: I and I genuinely just like got the cheapest outfit,

545
00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:05,840
Speaker 1: put it on and roam around Times Square with my

546
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:09,280
Speaker 1: friends and have the best time. And everyone kept sending

547
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:13,320
Speaker 1: me these memes because every everybody else kind of went

548
00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,360
Speaker 1: all out and maybe I could have painted my face

549
00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:19,960
Speaker 1: and done a little more, but everyone looked really sexy

550
00:32:20,000 --> 00:32:25,200
Speaker 1: and fun and literally I was a banana. That's basically

551
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:29,080
Speaker 1: sums up who I am to a tea and it

552
00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 1: was that to me means that I don't have to

553
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 1: be perfect all the time.

554
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:35,280
Speaker 3: I'd rather be that girl.

555
00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:37,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, And how does that apply to work? Like, how

556
00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:42,040
Speaker 2: does that perfectionist mindset work in terms of like music

557
00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:45,760
Speaker 2: or creation or acting? Like, because that's beautiful in your

558
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:49,320
Speaker 2: personal life. It sounds like there's this acceptance of you know,

559
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:53,320
Speaker 2: we can be yeah, we can be more inflow. But

560
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:56,520
Speaker 2: then how does that apply to like writing or creating

561
00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:57,560
Speaker 2: or building?

562
00:32:57,640 --> 00:33:02,400
Speaker 1: Like, well, I think how I I don't Well, I

563
00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:06,120
Speaker 1: always say this in any session, there are no stupid questions.

564
00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 1: I always have to say that out loud, because sometimes

565
00:33:09,640 --> 00:33:13,080
Speaker 1: I genuinely will think, well, what does this mean? And

566
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:17,040
Speaker 1: how can I unpack this and create a song from this?

567
00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:20,240
Speaker 1: Or how do I unpack this scene and do the

568
00:33:20,280 --> 00:33:24,520
Speaker 1: best I can? You know, there are mistakes that happen

569
00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:27,320
Speaker 1: in the studio and on set that actually end up

570
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:30,719
Speaker 1: becoming a part of it. You know, me messing up

571
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 1: a line actually ended up being funny and we kept

572
00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:36,959
Speaker 1: it in the show. Or you know, there's something I

573
00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:39,800
Speaker 1: said in a lyric that was wrong and it ends

574
00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:42,680
Speaker 1: up being the biggest hook that we've got. And I

575
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:47,080
Speaker 1: look for those moments, Yeah, crave I crave those moments.

576
00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:49,440
Speaker 2: That's a great example. I love all of those. Yeah,

577
00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 2: And that's what feels like magic, right. It's when the

578
00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:58,920
Speaker 2: imperfection can somehow become a part of the process where

579
00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:02,440
Speaker 2: you're just like, wow, this actually feels like we got somewhere.

580
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 2: And so I think when we start I love that

581
00:34:05,240 --> 00:34:09,879
Speaker 2: idea applied both personally and professionally, because I think even

582
00:34:09,960 --> 00:34:14,759
Speaker 2: the parts of ourselves that we consider to be imperfect,

583
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 2: the parts of ourselves that we consider to be broken,

584
00:34:17,719 --> 00:34:20,880
Speaker 2: when you start seeing use in those when you start

585
00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:21,920
Speaker 2: seeing purpose.

586
00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:25,880
Speaker 1: In those I always say that there's blessing in the

587
00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 1: breaking and every moment that you encounter in your life,

588
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:35,759
Speaker 1: even if it's just road rage as simple as that,

589
00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:40,359
Speaker 1: to maybe losing someone that you love. There is no

590
00:34:40,440 --> 00:34:43,960
Speaker 1: perfect way to heal, there's no perfect way of dealing

591
00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:48,080
Speaker 1: with something. It's more just how am I going to

592
00:34:48,120 --> 00:34:51,400
Speaker 1: be a better person? How am I going to make

593
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:53,600
Speaker 1: the best choice for myself so that I don't end

594
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:56,120
Speaker 1: up angry at that person on the highway, so that

595
00:34:56,200 --> 00:34:59,279
Speaker 1: I don't end up ruining my day because of what

596
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:03,279
Speaker 1: someone to me on the four h five. You know,

597
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:07,800
Speaker 1: I want to also say that how can I turn

598
00:35:07,960 --> 00:35:12,160
Speaker 1: something like losing someone I so dearly love into well,

599
00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:15,120
Speaker 1: how can I celebrate that person and the great things

600
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:19,239
Speaker 1: that they're that they provided me or that they gave me.

601
00:35:20,080 --> 00:35:22,359
Speaker 1: That takes a lot of work, So I don't say

602
00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:25,520
Speaker 1: that lightly, but I try my hardest to do that,

603
00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:28,319
Speaker 1: and I try to have my friends hold me accountable

604
00:35:28,440 --> 00:35:32,799
Speaker 1: to reminding me, hey, let's try to flip this and

605
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:34,920
Speaker 1: try to turn it into something else.

606
00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:39,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I think what what I'm gathering from

607
00:35:39,719 --> 00:35:42,600
Speaker 2: listening to you is that again, it's you're not saying

608
00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:45,680
Speaker 2: I've arrived, and this is how I think. Now you're saying,

609
00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:47,440
Speaker 2: this is what I'm trying to practice, Like, this is

610
00:35:47,480 --> 00:35:49,759
Speaker 2: the this is the approach that I'm mining in my

611
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:50,360
Speaker 2: own life.

612
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:53,960
Speaker 1: And absolutely this is practice. Every day is practice. I

613
00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:57,480
Speaker 1: even said it last night at the premiere. I was saying,

614
00:35:58,160 --> 00:36:01,839
Speaker 1: I don't I don't have anything out. I'm definitely not

615
00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:07,120
Speaker 1: like I'm sold, I'm good. It's it's more just this

616
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:10,759
Speaker 1: is a continuation. My story is not done, and I

617
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:13,480
Speaker 1: can't wait to find out what's going to happen next.

618
00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:17,000
Speaker 1: And doesn't mean it's going to be easy and sure

619
00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:19,400
Speaker 1: there's going to be bumps that happen, but I'm going

620
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:20,640
Speaker 1: to learn how to live with them.

621
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, as someone who's so committed to moving forward, what

622
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:25,840
Speaker 2: did it feel like going back to like your school

623
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:28,440
Speaker 2: and all these old places. I won't give away too

624
00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 2: anybody in the documentary, you go visit, what does that

625
00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:33,239
Speaker 2: do well?

626
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:39,400
Speaker 1: Going home is like to me, it's it's untainted territory.

627
00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:44,560
Speaker 1: It is safe, it is simple and kind. Where I'm from,

628
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:50,359
Speaker 1: it is all about you know, being together, loving each other.

629
00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:53,600
Speaker 1: I go home and people are like, welcome home, Miss Gomez.

630
00:36:53,760 --> 00:36:57,400
Speaker 1: They're not you know, treating me any differently. And I

631
00:36:57,560 --> 00:37:02,400
Speaker 1: enjoy and I enjoy visiting you know what made me

632
00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:06,359
Speaker 1: who I am, and it always gives me a good

633
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:09,680
Speaker 1: sense of like, Oh, I hope I can inspire people

634
00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:11,680
Speaker 1: from where I'm from, because there's not a lot to

635
00:37:11,719 --> 00:37:14,840
Speaker 1: do where I'm from, but I hope I can inspire

636
00:37:14,960 --> 00:37:17,000
Speaker 1: just one person to do something bigger than that.

637
00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:19,080
Speaker 2: Was there any particular place that you went back there

638
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:23,400
Speaker 2: almost gave you a special feeling or something surprised you

639
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 2: that you're like, oh, I didn't think this was gonna be.

640
00:37:25,360 --> 00:37:29,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, my snow cone place, I really I loved

641
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:31,279
Speaker 1: that place. I would go with my dad all the

642
00:37:31,360 --> 00:37:34,000
Speaker 1: time and my cousin and we would get the pickle

643
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:36,920
Speaker 1: snow cones with like you know, grape in it, and

644
00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:41,560
Speaker 1: it would just be so yummy and amazing, and it just,

645
00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:43,440
Speaker 1: you know, brought me back to when it would be

646
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:46,640
Speaker 1: so hot in Texas and I was with my family

647
00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:48,960
Speaker 1: and we would just stop there and sit outside for

648
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:52,400
Speaker 1: an hour and just talk and it was just the best.

649
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,120
Speaker 2: Yeah. I love that. Yeah, that's that's great to hear.

650
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:58,320
Speaker 2: I think there's always I have this park in my hometown.

651
00:37:58,800 --> 00:38:03,239
Speaker 2: It's called Broomfield Park, and it's it's still charming to me,

652
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:07,520
Speaker 2: even though I don't think if anyone else went, I know,

653
00:38:07,960 --> 00:38:09,719
Speaker 2: but when I go back, I know where I used

654
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:11,880
Speaker 2: to go and buy my my ice cream from, and

655
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:13,799
Speaker 2: you know where the truck would be, and there's there's

656
00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:17,640
Speaker 2: all these special moments that you that almost but it

657
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:20,480
Speaker 2: sounds like again like it sounds like it's not like

658
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:22,680
Speaker 2: you're like, oh, I missed that. It's almost like that

659
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:24,520
Speaker 2: was a part of me and it's a beautiful thing.

660
00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:26,920
Speaker 2: But now I'm happy to be new. And even today

661
00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:29,200
Speaker 2: when we were just walking over here and we were

662
00:38:29,239 --> 00:38:33,200
Speaker 2: talking about just you finding places that fuel you. Yeah,

663
00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:38,280
Speaker 2: and it seems like you've become open to saying okay,

664
00:38:38,280 --> 00:38:41,719
Speaker 2: it's okay that life is changing and transitioning, and there's

665
00:38:41,760 --> 00:38:44,760
Speaker 2: new places that feel more like home than old places.

666
00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:50,200
Speaker 1: I hate change, I really do. But I felt in

667
00:38:50,239 --> 00:38:54,839
Speaker 1: the past year, which is pretty just it's pretty new,

668
00:38:56,120 --> 00:39:03,440
Speaker 1: I have really really embraced the uncomfortableness of change. And

669
00:39:03,520 --> 00:39:06,399
Speaker 1: I think it's because I get so exhausted of the

670
00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:11,600
Speaker 1: same thing over and over again and it scares me.

671
00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:17,240
Speaker 1: But I did learn that my world can be bigger

672
00:39:18,400 --> 00:39:21,680
Speaker 1: by being in a different destination. I work on my

673
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:24,560
Speaker 1: show Only Murders in the building. It's in New York

674
00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 1: where I shoot, and I never I've never spent more

675
00:39:28,040 --> 00:39:30,279
Speaker 1: than a week or two in New York, and I'm

676
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:35,560
Speaker 1: there for months. And just that alone was an uncomfortable,

677
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:40,040
Speaker 1: you know, experience, But I loved it, and I loved

678
00:39:40,160 --> 00:39:44,520
Speaker 1: the friendships I made and the knowledge that I was gaining,

679
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:49,359
Speaker 1: the people I was around the park and walking, and

680
00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:55,600
Speaker 1: just how like precious life is. It's celebrated, there's culture.

681
00:39:55,840 --> 00:39:59,560
Speaker 1: It just becomes addicting to want to put yourself in

682
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:03,120
Speaker 1: these situations and see what happens. So I will say,

683
00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:06,720
Speaker 1: in the past year, I've felt more comfortable with change,

684
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:10,560
Speaker 1: and I'm grateful for it, and I just I'm going

685
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:12,960
Speaker 1: to continue to do that. I want that.

686
00:40:13,320 --> 00:40:16,080
Speaker 2: How did you get comfortable with that discomfort? I guess

687
00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:17,759
Speaker 2: in the first place, if you're someone who said, you know,

688
00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:22,000
Speaker 2: like hated change, didn't like change, what I guess obviously

689
00:40:22,080 --> 00:40:24,840
Speaker 2: naturally work and everything like that, But was there something

690
00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:26,799
Speaker 2: internally where you're like, Okay, now I need to because

691
00:40:26,840 --> 00:40:30,080
Speaker 2: you've done this, You've done uncomfortable things your whole life, right, Definitely,

692
00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:32,080
Speaker 2: like you've had to do so many difficult things, whether

693
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:35,320
Speaker 2: it's going on tour when you're young or transitioning careers,

694
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:37,800
Speaker 2: You've constantly done uncomfortable things.

695
00:40:37,880 --> 00:40:40,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I think I had always kind of returned

696
00:40:40,760 --> 00:40:46,000
Speaker 1: to the same behavior and the same pattern of maybe, well,

697
00:40:46,040 --> 00:40:48,600
Speaker 1: I'm nervous of going out because I don't want to

698
00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:50,920
Speaker 1: be seen today, or I'm going to just stay in

699
00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:54,160
Speaker 1: because I feel anxious, or I don't want to go

700
00:40:54,280 --> 00:40:57,479
Speaker 1: out to that event because I don't want to get seen.

701
00:40:57,640 --> 00:41:01,040
Speaker 1: It just I was I was finding my self just

702
00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:03,719
Speaker 1: being terrified of the world, and that just isn't a

703
00:41:03,760 --> 00:41:07,200
Speaker 1: way of living. And it's easy to go do a

704
00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:10,759
Speaker 1: job because well, I'm with a bunch of people. They

705
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:13,240
Speaker 1: helped me look good. I do my job, I smile,

706
00:41:13,320 --> 00:41:18,319
Speaker 1: and I'm done. But taking spontaneous trips or you know,

707
00:41:18,440 --> 00:41:21,680
Speaker 1: getting out and going to the Balboa Park, which is

708
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:24,560
Speaker 1: a very simple park, just doing that kind of stuff

709
00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:29,880
Speaker 1: is necessary. And I noticed that New York really helped me.

710
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:35,160
Speaker 1: It just really opened me up. The show is really great,

711
00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:38,839
Speaker 1: and I think being around a bunch of New Yorkers

712
00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:41,080
Speaker 1: it does something to you. Man, It's good.

713
00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:43,440
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, one of the biggest changes in atmosphere that

714
00:41:43,440 --> 00:41:45,560
Speaker 2: you talk about the documentary is you go to Africa, right,

715
00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:49,239
Speaker 2: and that's a that's a big change, definitely, you know,

716
00:41:49,280 --> 00:41:51,080
Speaker 2: even if it's a shorter period of time, but you

717
00:41:51,120 --> 00:41:52,680
Speaker 2: were still there for a.

718
00:41:52,800 --> 00:41:55,440
Speaker 1: There for a week, yes, but I mean that definitely

719
00:41:55,520 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 1: wasn't the first time that I had taken trips in

720
00:42:00,840 --> 00:42:03,920
Speaker 1: the vein of wanting to go for a mission. And

721
00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:08,080
Speaker 1: it was one of the most beautiful moments of the

722
00:42:08,160 --> 00:42:12,000
Speaker 1: film for me because we actually thought we were just

723
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:14,480
Speaker 1: going to make a quick little video about you know,

724
00:42:14,719 --> 00:42:17,959
Speaker 1: what we were there to do, and then we fell

725
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:19,839
Speaker 1: in love with the people, We fell in love with

726
00:42:19,880 --> 00:42:24,319
Speaker 1: the story, and we started noticing that everywhere in the

727
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:30,160
Speaker 1: world mental health is very, very real. It's very much

728
00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:37,600
Speaker 1: something that's affecting everyone. And then you kind of realize

729
00:42:37,680 --> 00:42:42,879
Speaker 1: that the world is a small place sometimes because you're

730
00:42:42,920 --> 00:42:46,240
Speaker 1: all kind of walking through pain and you're all looking

731
00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:49,520
Speaker 1: at things in a different way, but ultimately you all

732
00:42:49,560 --> 00:42:54,719
Speaker 1: want to be happy. And I felt like they inspired

733
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:57,919
Speaker 1: me more than I could have done anything for them.

734
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:02,360
Speaker 1: It was a really beautiful trip, and yeah, it was

735
00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:04,080
Speaker 1: one of my favorite moments of the film.

736
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:06,759
Speaker 2: People don't always understand how mental health exists ever in

737
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:09,520
Speaker 2: the world. When you said that they're also experiencing mental health,

738
00:43:09,520 --> 00:43:12,040
Speaker 2: what was their experience of it compared to what we

739
00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:14,160
Speaker 2: would understand is our experience in the US.

740
00:43:14,200 --> 00:43:18,120
Speaker 1: So yeah, Well, I was talking to a woman named

741
00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:22,400
Speaker 1: Betty and she was, you know, basically kind of the

742
00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:26,080
Speaker 1: person touring giving us the tour around the village and

743
00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:29,520
Speaker 1: the schools, and she was lovely. But when we stopped

744
00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:32,120
Speaker 1: to have a conversation, we just were sitting down and

745
00:43:32,160 --> 00:43:37,600
Speaker 1: she told me her story and how she was dealing

746
00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:42,560
Speaker 1: with suicidal thoughts and not how she went to a

747
00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:49,799
Speaker 1: lake and sat there for two weeks contemplating, not a

748
00:43:49,920 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 1: day or an hour of moment, it was two weeks.

749
00:43:55,360 --> 00:43:59,360
Speaker 1: And that was something that I felt floored by because

750
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:04,239
Speaker 1: that's different. Obviously we can have those thoughts, but she

751
00:44:04,719 --> 00:44:08,520
Speaker 1: dismissed herself from everyone, and she had to find it

752
00:44:08,560 --> 00:44:11,440
Speaker 1: with herself when so many people don't need to walk

753
00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:15,120
Speaker 1: through that alone. But she did, and she did it well,

754
00:44:15,280 --> 00:44:18,200
Speaker 1: and she's proud of it. And now she is in

755
00:44:19,120 --> 00:44:22,160
Speaker 1: an incredible school and she is going to grow up

756
00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:25,360
Speaker 1: to be the best influence for her village, for her sisters,

757
00:44:25,400 --> 00:44:29,640
Speaker 1: for everyone that she's around. That's so so special, and

758
00:44:29,719 --> 00:44:34,440
Speaker 1: I'm just having those conversations as someone from across the world.

759
00:44:34,520 --> 00:44:38,200
Speaker 1: It's mind blowing. You don't really know what people are

760
00:44:38,239 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 1: walking through until you do stop and have a conversation

761
00:44:42,360 --> 00:44:46,799
Speaker 1: two weeks that I can't imagine that feeling what you

762
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:49,719
Speaker 1: must be walking through for two weeks to just be

763
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:50,439
Speaker 1: sitting there.

764
00:44:50,680 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 2: And did she feel the same from your deeper conversation

765
00:44:54,239 --> 00:44:56,840
Speaker 2: with her, did she feel the same feeling that a

766
00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:58,399
Speaker 2: lot of people do here where it's like I don't

767
00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 2: know who to talk to and I don't know a

768
00:45:00,880 --> 00:45:01,680
Speaker 2: dono to trust.

769
00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:06,040
Speaker 1: She thought that she needed to be everything for her family,

770
00:45:06,360 --> 00:45:08,880
Speaker 1: and she felt like she was letting them down, the

771
00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:12,160
Speaker 1: same thing of not feeling good enough, not feeling like

772
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:17,120
Speaker 1: her being there would even be helpful. And you do

773
00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:21,520
Speaker 1: find the similarities in it, and that's how I felt

774
00:45:21,560 --> 00:45:22,719
Speaker 1: like I bonded with her.

775
00:45:22,960 --> 00:45:26,719
Speaker 2: It's incredible, right a cross culture, cross world, to have

776
00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 2: a human moment like that with someone. What purpose of

777
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:33,480
Speaker 2: those missions played in your life in terms of, like

778
00:45:33,520 --> 00:45:35,160
Speaker 2: you said, this is not the first time you've been out,

779
00:45:35,200 --> 00:45:37,799
Speaker 2: and I'm sure it's not the last as well. It's

780
00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:40,000
Speaker 2: something that you want to continue to do. I mean,

781
00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:41,640
Speaker 2: there was a moment in the documentary where you don't

782
00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:42,080
Speaker 2: want to leave.

783
00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:46,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think I necessarily will always be broadcasting

784
00:45:46,840 --> 00:45:50,439
Speaker 1: when I'm taking these trips or wanting to do more

785
00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:55,359
Speaker 1: and help and travel. So I think that I will

786
00:45:55,520 --> 00:46:01,439
Speaker 1: probably have these quarterly or even just maybe once a year.

787
00:46:02,160 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 1: I kind of have to set time apart for that,

788
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:09,840
Speaker 1: and I make it a priority just because I feel

789
00:46:10,160 --> 00:46:14,400
Speaker 1: personally that everyone is my brother and sister. We're all

790
00:46:14,440 --> 00:46:19,960
Speaker 1: here together, living being and you know, wanting to navigate

791
00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 1: life together. And I want to continue to travel the

792
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:27,280
Speaker 1: world and be able to spread some sort of message

793
00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:32,520
Speaker 1: or bring change in some form. I don't know something,

794
00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:34,840
Speaker 1: you know. I want to be able to continue to

795
00:46:34,840 --> 00:46:37,840
Speaker 1: always do something, and eventually, I do believe my life

796
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:43,600
Speaker 1: will We'll end up being something along the lines of

797
00:46:43,840 --> 00:46:46,680
Speaker 1: doing the things that you do. You know, I got

798
00:46:46,719 --> 00:46:50,439
Speaker 1: a few more things to do first, but eventually, yes, well.

799
00:46:50,360 --> 00:46:53,279
Speaker 2: You're already doing them. You know, you're already doing them.

800
00:46:53,520 --> 00:46:57,120
Speaker 2: And yeah, there's that moment. There's the moment in the documentary.

801
00:46:57,160 --> 00:47:01,360
Speaker 2: I think you're asked through a mirror envelope question, what

802
00:47:01,560 --> 00:47:04,399
Speaker 2: is the what is your greatest dream or your ultimate dream,

803
00:47:04,440 --> 00:47:08,120
Speaker 2: I think is the word, and this is exactly where

804
00:47:08,160 --> 00:47:09,399
Speaker 2: you say. You say, I want to find a way

805
00:47:09,440 --> 00:47:12,160
Speaker 2: to change lives, and I want to find a way

806
00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:14,680
Speaker 2: to impact lives. And I think when people think of

807
00:47:14,719 --> 00:47:18,480
Speaker 2: their ultimate dream, that's not the natural thing that comes

808
00:47:18,480 --> 00:47:22,880
Speaker 2: to their mind. When did serving When did helping others

809
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:25,919
Speaker 2: become such a big understanding others as well? Because it's

810
00:47:25,920 --> 00:47:29,360
Speaker 2: not just I know you feel you're growing from these experiences.

811
00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:32,719
Speaker 2: When did that become an ultimate dream? Like when did that? Yea,

812
00:47:33,080 --> 00:47:34,799
Speaker 2: what was your dream as a little girl? And then

813
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:36,120
Speaker 2: you know, how did that evolve?

814
00:47:36,320 --> 00:47:39,000
Speaker 1: I think that I was just I was just going

815
00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:42,080
Speaker 1: to say my mom, I mean, from a very young age,

816
00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:46,359
Speaker 1: we didn't have a lot, but it didn't matter. It

817
00:47:46,480 --> 00:47:51,960
Speaker 1: was every Thanksgiving we were going to you know, we

818
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:55,640
Speaker 1: would go and help out in soup kitchens and my

819
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:58,520
Speaker 1: mom would talk to me about, you know, why we

820
00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:02,400
Speaker 1: were there and explain to me the way of the world,

821
00:48:02,520 --> 00:48:06,640
Speaker 1: and we would, you know, see really hard things and

822
00:48:06,760 --> 00:48:11,920
Speaker 1: Texas you know, can be very you know, very conservative,

823
00:48:11,960 --> 00:48:14,560
Speaker 1: and my mom would just break those barriers for me

824
00:48:14,640 --> 00:48:17,520
Speaker 1: and explain to me how beautiful people are and how

825
00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:21,640
Speaker 1: complicated and complex things are. About the world. She never

826
00:48:21,719 --> 00:48:25,719
Speaker 1: protected me in a way of not showing me the

827
00:48:25,760 --> 00:48:30,839
Speaker 1: bad things. She showed me everything. And that's what has

828
00:48:31,520 --> 00:48:34,840
Speaker 1: always been a part of my life. I mean down

829
00:48:34,920 --> 00:48:38,719
Speaker 1: to I'd be on set and I'd be talking to

830
00:48:38,760 --> 00:48:41,080
Speaker 1: the director and someone would come give me a water,

831
00:48:41,200 --> 00:48:43,600
Speaker 1: and if my mom noticed that he didn't say thank you,

832
00:48:43,719 --> 00:48:46,239
Speaker 1: she would just remind me gently in a way that

833
00:48:46,400 --> 00:48:50,480
Speaker 1: was like, hey, next time, be aware and be thankful.

834
00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:53,439
Speaker 1: And it's kind of like, oh, yeah, you're right, sorry, Mom,

835
00:48:53,480 --> 00:48:56,800
Speaker 1: but you're right, you are. You got to be aware

836
00:48:56,840 --> 00:48:59,839
Speaker 1: of people, and you have to be aware of what

837
00:49:00,000 --> 00:49:00,959
Speaker 1: people are walking through.

838
00:49:01,239 --> 00:49:03,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that's such a yeah, yeah no, And

839
00:49:03,960 --> 00:49:06,680
Speaker 2: it's such a I think that's such a beautiful message

840
00:49:06,719 --> 00:49:09,799
Speaker 2: to anyone who is growing up with a little bit

841
00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:12,440
Speaker 2: more in terms of anyone who's grown up even you know,

842
00:49:12,480 --> 00:49:15,319
Speaker 2: everyone goes through so many difficult things. But I felt

843
00:49:15,360 --> 00:49:17,360
Speaker 2: the same when I first went to India. I was

844
00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:19,960
Speaker 2: around nine years old when I first went to India,

845
00:49:20,040 --> 00:49:22,960
Speaker 2: and I remember we didn't have a lot growing up,

846
00:49:22,960 --> 00:49:24,600
Speaker 2: but we were still traveling to India. We were in

847
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:27,880
Speaker 2: a car and you look out the window and you

848
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:30,200
Speaker 2: see kids your age. I remember you know, just seeing

849
00:49:30,239 --> 00:49:32,799
Speaker 2: tons of kids my age on the streets and just

850
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:36,520
Speaker 2: it was just, yeah, it just made me aware that

851
00:49:36,560 --> 00:49:39,560
Speaker 2: there was a whole other world out there of experience

852
00:49:39,640 --> 00:49:43,360
Speaker 2: that I only learned about later on. Yeah, but I

853
00:49:43,680 --> 00:49:47,680
Speaker 2: can agree with you more that when you feel like

854
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:50,640
Speaker 2: you're a part, even a small part of the solution,

855
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:56,960
Speaker 2: the problem starts to feel more within reach, right. And

856
00:49:57,000 --> 00:50:00,120
Speaker 2: I feel like sometimes when we pushed the problem away,

857
00:50:00,160 --> 00:50:03,120
Speaker 2: try and keep it out of sight, it just feels

858
00:50:03,120 --> 00:50:04,800
Speaker 2: bigger and harder and more difficult.

859
00:50:04,880 --> 00:50:09,680
Speaker 1: Absolutely ignoring it is not fun. I've done that before.

860
00:50:10,400 --> 00:50:14,200
Speaker 1: It just you end up coping in ways that you

861
00:50:14,320 --> 00:50:17,120
Speaker 1: never thought that you would, and you end up feeling

862
00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:22,320
Speaker 1: disappointed because you just you don't want to ever feel

863
00:50:22,840 --> 00:50:28,520
Speaker 1: like you're doing the wrong thing. I believe that everyone

864
00:50:29,160 --> 00:50:34,040
Speaker 1: deep down knows what's right and what's wrong. And when

865
00:50:34,040 --> 00:50:37,319
Speaker 1: you're at your rock bottom, if you will, because I

866
00:50:37,360 --> 00:50:42,840
Speaker 1: believe that everybody does eventually have one of those moments.

867
00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:47,680
Speaker 1: Hopefully it's just going to get lighter and lighter because

868
00:50:47,760 --> 00:50:50,840
Speaker 1: you can start to attack it in a way where

869
00:50:51,239 --> 00:50:54,920
Speaker 1: how do I approach this and figure out how to

870
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:58,600
Speaker 1: get myself out of this state of mind? And I've

871
00:50:58,719 --> 00:51:01,000
Speaker 1: learned how to do that in the past few years,

872
00:51:01,239 --> 00:51:04,879
Speaker 1: and I'm really grateful for it. It's a choice sometimes.

873
00:51:04,920 --> 00:51:08,080
Speaker 1: But then I also hate when people say that, because

874
00:51:08,080 --> 00:51:13,279
Speaker 1: sometimes I genuinely wake up in a depressive state and

875
00:51:13,360 --> 00:51:15,760
Speaker 1: I can't get out of bed. But I allow myself

876
00:51:15,800 --> 00:51:19,640
Speaker 1: to have that day and just focus on things that

877
00:51:19,680 --> 00:51:23,160
Speaker 1: can make me feel better instead of pushing it away

878
00:51:23,239 --> 00:51:26,000
Speaker 1: and saying, no, it's fine, I'm going to go out,

879
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:28,200
Speaker 1: I'm going to go do something, I'm going to go

880
00:51:28,640 --> 00:51:31,560
Speaker 1: get my adrenaline up. I'm going to ignore it and

881
00:51:31,640 --> 00:51:33,879
Speaker 1: ignore it and ignore it. It doesn't help at all.

882
00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:37,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you just said there that everyone goes through

883
00:51:37,440 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 2: a rock bottom moment, Like everyone goes through that in

884
00:51:40,200 --> 00:51:42,960
Speaker 2: their life in different ways. How have you become more

885
00:51:43,000 --> 00:51:46,920
Speaker 2: mindful of your fears and rock bottoms? Because I think

886
00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:49,799
Speaker 2: often we ask people like I look at your life

887
00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:51,960
Speaker 2: and I think you've You've gone through so many difficult things,

888
00:51:52,000 --> 00:51:55,120
Speaker 2: and you know, how do you deal with fears now?

889
00:51:55,200 --> 00:51:57,960
Speaker 2: Because we all still have fears, we all still have worries.

890
00:51:58,000 --> 00:51:59,879
Speaker 2: But I feel like you've found a way to become

891
00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:02,840
Speaker 2: mindful of those things and become a bit more prepared

892
00:52:02,840 --> 00:52:03,160
Speaker 2: for them.

893
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:06,920
Speaker 1: Well, thank you. I think maybe you are seeing a

894
00:52:06,960 --> 00:52:10,520
Speaker 1: good side of me, because I have the hardest time

895
00:52:10,640 --> 00:52:11,200
Speaker 1: doing it.

896
00:52:11,880 --> 00:52:12,640
Speaker 3: I don't know.

897
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:19,319
Speaker 1: My fears are relatively you know, they're quieter. Maybe I

898
00:52:19,320 --> 00:52:23,120
Speaker 1: should say, you know, like for example, this documentary coming out,

899
00:52:23,239 --> 00:52:30,080
Speaker 1: I am still nervous. I'm nervous for the reaction, even

900
00:52:30,120 --> 00:52:32,919
Speaker 1: though I know that I have good intentions behind it.

901
00:52:34,040 --> 00:52:36,520
Speaker 1: I think that I just have to understand that my

902
00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:41,120
Speaker 1: fears are only going to continue to show me what

903
00:52:41,239 --> 00:52:44,640
Speaker 1: I'm capable of. The more that I face my fears,

904
00:52:44,719 --> 00:52:48,320
Speaker 1: the more that I feel I'm gaining strength, I'm gaining wisdom,

905
00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:50,719
Speaker 1: and I just want to keep doing that. And I

906
00:52:50,960 --> 00:52:54,120
Speaker 1: just hope to get better, hope to get smarter. I

907
00:52:54,160 --> 00:52:58,200
Speaker 1: hope to become stronger and be a great person.

908
00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:02,839
Speaker 2: Yeah that's I mean, that's a phenomenal answer. And it's yeah,

909
00:53:02,840 --> 00:53:04,359
Speaker 2: I don't think i'm seeing the I don't think it's

910
00:53:04,600 --> 00:53:07,120
Speaker 2: a good side of you. Cele I think I'm I'm

911
00:53:07,239 --> 00:53:12,399
Speaker 2: like you. I think you know, I I don't think

912
00:53:12,400 --> 00:53:13,960
Speaker 2: it's a good side because I don't believe you have

913
00:53:13,960 --> 00:53:16,759
Speaker 2: a bad side. And and but I but I think

914
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:20,279
Speaker 2: it's a it's your truth that we're seeing, you know,

915
00:53:20,360 --> 00:53:23,640
Speaker 2: it's it's it's this, it's the it's the essence of

916
00:53:23,719 --> 00:53:27,240
Speaker 2: us that I'm trying to see in you and myself,

917
00:53:27,360 --> 00:53:30,360
Speaker 2: in my anyone around me, anyone I meet, whoever you

918
00:53:30,400 --> 00:53:33,920
Speaker 2: bump into. It's like when you see someone's essence, that

919
00:53:34,120 --> 00:53:38,040
Speaker 2: essence is pure and is genuine. It is like strong

920
00:53:38,160 --> 00:53:42,200
Speaker 2: and powerful and capable, and it's the Everything else is

921
00:53:42,239 --> 00:53:44,240
Speaker 2: not a side of us. It's just stuff that covers

922
00:53:44,320 --> 00:53:46,759
Speaker 2: us up right, right, Like doesn't it feel that way?

923
00:53:46,840 --> 00:53:48,160
Speaker 3: Like you're absolutely right?

924
00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:50,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like I feel like I don't have a we

925
00:53:50,840 --> 00:53:52,239
Speaker 2: don't have a I don't have a side of me

926
00:53:52,360 --> 00:53:54,399
Speaker 2: that I don't like. I have stuff that's covering over

927
00:53:54,440 --> 00:53:55,880
Speaker 2: who I really am exactly.

928
00:53:56,040 --> 00:53:59,239
Speaker 1: And it's how to how do you navigate controlling those

929
00:53:59,280 --> 00:54:02,160
Speaker 1: things and in control of your yourself?

930
00:54:02,440 --> 00:54:04,960
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, And I love what you just said about

931
00:54:04,960 --> 00:54:08,239
Speaker 2: how confronting your fears is what gives you a sense

932
00:54:08,280 --> 00:54:11,560
Speaker 2: of confidence and strength, because when you get through something.

933
00:54:11,360 --> 00:54:16,279
Speaker 1: Tough, it does it feels incredible. I mean, walking through

934
00:54:16,640 --> 00:54:20,480
Speaker 1: all of those moments that I'm sharing with everybody else,

935
00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:25,720
Speaker 1: it is really great. I Mean it's so sad to watch,

936
00:54:25,800 --> 00:54:28,600
Speaker 1: but I would not be who I am. Of course,

937
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:30,600
Speaker 1: it's such a cliche if it wasn't for that, But

938
00:54:30,719 --> 00:54:34,919
Speaker 1: facing your fears and tackling them it's the only way

939
00:54:34,960 --> 00:54:35,719
Speaker 1: to get through them.

940
00:54:35,840 --> 00:54:39,560
Speaker 2: I feel, yeah, you said intention is so important there,

941
00:54:39,600 --> 00:54:43,280
Speaker 2: and I think that anyone who's in the public eye

942
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:46,759
Speaker 2: sometimes all you have is your intention because you can't

943
00:54:46,760 --> 00:54:50,319
Speaker 2: control anything else. Yeah, what role is intention played in

944
00:54:50,360 --> 00:54:55,600
Speaker 2: your life? And then with this work more clearly, what

945
00:54:55,760 --> 00:54:58,640
Speaker 2: is your intention for everyone who's going to watch it? Like,

946
00:54:59,400 --> 00:55:04,400
Speaker 2: what is your hope and wish for the different people

947
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:05,799
Speaker 2: that will see it? But first of all, what role

948
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:08,680
Speaker 2: is intention played in your life? Especially as things have

949
00:55:09,239 --> 00:55:10,080
Speaker 2: continued to grow?

950
00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:13,920
Speaker 1: You know, I think maybe in the past five years,

951
00:55:16,000 --> 00:55:22,040
Speaker 1: I felt like projects I was a part of, even endorsements,

952
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:27,359
Speaker 1: something like that, the intention behind me being a part

953
00:55:27,400 --> 00:55:33,239
Speaker 1: of anything needed to be good. If I did, if

954
00:55:33,239 --> 00:55:34,879
Speaker 1: I got a lot of money, and I'm just being

955
00:55:34,920 --> 00:55:38,640
Speaker 1: super transparent from doing this line for a T shirt

956
00:55:38,680 --> 00:55:41,919
Speaker 1: and I'm just making this up, there's a huge part

957
00:55:41,960 --> 00:55:45,560
Speaker 1: of me that actually feels uncomfortable with the whole idea,

958
00:55:46,360 --> 00:55:49,799
Speaker 1: and that's just me. I have to think, Okay, this

959
00:55:49,840 --> 00:55:52,760
Speaker 1: is thank you, but I need to figure out how

960
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:55,400
Speaker 1: this is also not going to be just about me.

961
00:55:56,040 --> 00:55:58,680
Speaker 1: It's going to be about everyone that's involved in this.

962
00:55:58,840 --> 00:56:00,839
Speaker 1: How can I turn it into to, hey, we're going

963
00:56:00,920 --> 00:56:04,080
Speaker 1: to do some percentages to this, and this is how

964
00:56:04,120 --> 00:56:07,080
Speaker 1: we're going to do the deal. I then feel more

965
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:12,000
Speaker 1: comfortable stepping into a situation and accepting it. But I've

966
00:56:12,080 --> 00:56:15,120
Speaker 1: never based my decisions on what will get me to

967
00:56:15,200 --> 00:56:20,040
Speaker 1: the top quicker, what will make me number one? Will

968
00:56:20,080 --> 00:56:22,719
Speaker 1: I break records? All of those things to me are

969
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:25,960
Speaker 1: just bonuses. They're just great if it happens, it happens

970
00:56:25,960 --> 00:56:28,960
Speaker 1: that way. But that's never been my intention. And some

971
00:56:29,080 --> 00:56:31,800
Speaker 1: people in my position would think that's kind of stupid.

972
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:34,759
Speaker 1: You know, it's the whole point of doing it is

973
00:56:34,800 --> 00:56:37,360
Speaker 1: to break these records, is to do all that stuff.

974
00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:40,000
Speaker 1: But for me, and I think the reason why I

975
00:56:40,040 --> 00:56:43,920
Speaker 1: am who I am is because just enough is what

976
00:56:44,000 --> 00:56:47,040
Speaker 1: I am. I think that I just want to be

977
00:56:47,239 --> 00:56:51,000
Speaker 1: enough and that doesn't have to be me killing myself

978
00:56:51,040 --> 00:56:56,360
Speaker 1: trying to be number one at something or striving to

979
00:56:56,440 --> 00:56:59,279
Speaker 1: be number one for something. It's exhausting.

980
00:57:00,080 --> 00:57:02,640
Speaker 2: How do you define being just enough? Now? Like? What

981
00:57:03,280 --> 00:57:04,960
Speaker 2: is that evolved? And I'm sure it will change and

982
00:57:05,000 --> 00:57:07,479
Speaker 2: I'm sure, bro, But right now, what is that I.

983
00:57:07,440 --> 00:57:13,480
Speaker 1: Feel, you know, I feel open, I feel ready for

984
00:57:14,400 --> 00:57:21,720
Speaker 1: relationships and change. I will be shooting season three, so

985
00:57:21,760 --> 00:57:24,160
Speaker 1: I'll be in New York for quite a bit and

986
00:57:25,240 --> 00:57:27,160
Speaker 1: I can't wait to see what will happen and all

987
00:57:27,200 --> 00:57:29,480
Speaker 1: the people will meet and all the people I get

988
00:57:29,520 --> 00:57:33,480
Speaker 1: to spend time with again, like Steven Marty, and it'll

989
00:57:33,520 --> 00:57:33,960
Speaker 1: be fun.

990
00:57:34,600 --> 00:57:38,160
Speaker 2: Yeah. I love that. Well, Selena, this has been such

991
00:57:38,160 --> 00:57:40,600
Speaker 2: a beautiful conversation. And the good thing is we don't

992
00:57:40,600 --> 00:57:42,440
Speaker 2: have to end it here, but we get to invite

993
00:57:43,080 --> 00:57:46,360
Speaker 2: we get a very special guest's joining us today, a

994
00:57:46,440 --> 00:57:49,680
Speaker 2: very special gift for my audience here and our community

995
00:57:49,720 --> 00:57:51,880
Speaker 2: and everyone who's listening and watching. We get to have

996
00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:54,440
Speaker 2: your mom on the show, which is amazing.

997
00:57:54,520 --> 00:57:55,439
Speaker 1: It's really fun.

998
00:57:55,600 --> 00:57:57,680
Speaker 2: So I am so excited about this because to be

999
00:57:57,720 --> 00:58:00,720
Speaker 2: able to talk to you both about the incredible work

1000
00:58:00,720 --> 00:58:04,800
Speaker 2: you're doing together, her incredible lessons that she shared with

1001
00:58:04,840 --> 00:58:07,320
Speaker 2: you over time, that you spoke about so beautifully today,

1002
00:58:08,000 --> 00:58:11,120
Speaker 2: and I got to talk to her before we started

1003
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:14,400
Speaker 2: recording as well, and just hearing about how innovative and

1004
00:58:14,440 --> 00:58:17,680
Speaker 2: creative she is. I mean, it's amazing. So if you're

1005
00:58:17,680 --> 00:58:19,920
Speaker 2: okay with it, I love to love it. Bring out

1006
00:58:19,920 --> 00:58:23,480
Speaker 2: your mom, Mandy over in a second, so we will

1007
00:58:23,680 --> 00:58:29,440
Speaker 2: go and grab her. Yeah, amazing. So I was so

1008
00:58:29,480 --> 00:58:32,480
Speaker 2: excited to have you hear Mandy, this is amazing. This

1009
00:58:32,560 --> 00:58:35,000
Speaker 2: is really special. When when I heard that I was

1010
00:58:35,040 --> 00:58:38,320
Speaker 2: going to have this opportunity, I think it's always interesting

1011
00:58:39,160 --> 00:58:43,439
Speaker 2: hearing about someone's journey through someone else's lens, especially your mom,

1012
00:58:43,520 --> 00:58:45,680
Speaker 2: like you know who else in the world. And now

1013
00:58:45,760 --> 00:58:47,240
Speaker 2: now my mom's going to be upset that I haven't

1014
00:58:47,280 --> 00:58:48,240
Speaker 2: had her on the podcast.

1015
00:58:49,080 --> 00:58:49,560
Speaker 1: I have it.

1016
00:58:49,640 --> 00:58:51,760
Speaker 2: So now now I feel the pressure.

1017
00:58:54,880 --> 00:58:59,480
Speaker 3: Make my podcast. I'll just make one there. I love it.

1018
00:58:59,520 --> 00:59:00,760
Speaker 2: But I was going to say, you know, it was

1019
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:04,760
Speaker 2: just so beautiful in the documentary and even just now

1020
00:59:04,800 --> 00:59:07,600
Speaker 2: hearing what Selena had to say about the amazing impact

1021
00:59:07,640 --> 00:59:09,920
Speaker 2: you've had on her, hearing about you going to the

1022
00:59:09,920 --> 00:59:13,840
Speaker 2: soup kitchens when Selena was younger in the documentary, as

1023
00:59:13,840 --> 00:59:16,880
Speaker 2: I said before, hearing about how you encourage her to

1024
00:59:16,920 --> 00:59:19,800
Speaker 2: learn about things that scared her. Yeah, and that would

1025
00:59:19,920 --> 00:59:23,000
Speaker 2: help her. I mean, these are really I hope you

1026
00:59:23,000 --> 00:59:27,440
Speaker 2: feel extremely proud of this incredible human being. Quite and

1027
00:59:27,680 --> 00:59:31,160
Speaker 2: just you know, from an outsider's point of view, just

1028
00:59:31,840 --> 00:59:34,480
Speaker 2: how incredible it is to see someone sharing their truth

1029
00:59:34,680 --> 00:59:38,080
Speaker 2: with so much bravery, so much courage and impacting the

1030
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:40,440
Speaker 2: lives and saving the lives of millions of people across

1031
00:59:40,440 --> 00:59:43,000
Speaker 2: the world. And I'm sure you feel a big part

1032
00:59:43,000 --> 00:59:43,240
Speaker 2: of that.

1033
00:59:43,320 --> 00:59:47,600
Speaker 3: So I mean, honestly, I always hope to be a

1034
00:59:47,680 --> 00:59:50,880
Speaker 3: role model, is in the sense that I was honest

1035
00:59:50,920 --> 00:59:56,640
Speaker 3: about everything with her and who I was and as

1036
00:59:56,680 --> 00:59:59,600
Speaker 3: a person, because I feel like sometimes if parents project

1037
01:00:00,720 --> 01:00:04,160
Speaker 3: a perfection, then their kids feel like they have to

1038
01:00:04,880 --> 01:00:08,080
Speaker 3: like live up to that or achieve more, you know,

1039
01:00:08,200 --> 01:00:11,080
Speaker 3: And I just wanted her to always know I'm a

1040
01:00:11,120 --> 01:00:14,520
Speaker 3: person I'm gonna mess up, and at I was sixteen,

1041
01:00:14,800 --> 01:00:16,760
Speaker 3: so I was even more of a lost person. So

1042
01:00:17,200 --> 01:00:19,160
Speaker 3: I'm kind of surprised she came out as great as

1043
01:00:19,200 --> 01:00:24,160
Speaker 3: she is, to be honest, But yes, I'm very proud

1044
01:00:24,160 --> 01:00:27,960
Speaker 3: of her, and you know, I played a little role

1045
01:00:28,000 --> 01:00:31,440
Speaker 3: in it. And then she's like navigated herself into a

1046
01:00:31,480 --> 01:00:36,280
Speaker 3: wonderful adult. And there's been ups and downs, but it's

1047
01:00:36,440 --> 01:00:39,280
Speaker 3: just been it's been an honor to be her mother.

1048
01:00:40,040 --> 01:00:42,320
Speaker 2: What does that feel like, I mean, that's a whole

1049
01:00:42,360 --> 01:00:46,400
Speaker 2: another experience having a child at sixteen. I mean, that's

1050
01:00:46,480 --> 01:00:50,360
Speaker 2: a very you know, challenging stressful thing for yourself to

1051
01:00:50,360 --> 01:00:50,760
Speaker 2: go through.

1052
01:00:51,160 --> 01:00:54,320
Speaker 3: You're obviously not mentally in a space to be raising

1053
01:00:54,360 --> 01:00:56,840
Speaker 3: a child because you are a child and you're trying

1054
01:00:56,840 --> 01:01:01,320
Speaker 3: to figure out who you are. And even in some

1055
01:01:01,360 --> 01:01:04,920
Speaker 3: of my really hard times, I feel Selena, I came

1056
01:01:04,960 --> 01:01:07,880
Speaker 3: into this world at the perfect time because I was

1057
01:01:07,960 --> 01:01:11,520
Speaker 3: really lost myself and I wasn't going down the right path.

1058
01:01:11,560 --> 01:01:13,880
Speaker 3: And then when I found I was pregnant, I was like, Oh,

1059
01:01:14,040 --> 01:01:17,840
Speaker 3: I have someone who's going to I'm responsible for and

1060
01:01:18,040 --> 01:01:20,880
Speaker 3: they're gonna look up to me for guidance. And even

1061
01:01:20,920 --> 01:01:24,320
Speaker 3: at a young age, that hit me. And I'm thankful

1062
01:01:24,400 --> 01:01:26,959
Speaker 3: that that hit me and that I I did allow

1063
01:01:27,040 --> 01:01:30,000
Speaker 3: that pressure to make sure that I was trying to

1064
01:01:30,000 --> 01:01:32,440
Speaker 3: do everything right for her. But that was a moment

1065
01:01:32,520 --> 01:01:35,720
Speaker 3: that when you're sixteen, in that phase, you're trying to

1066
01:01:35,720 --> 01:01:39,600
Speaker 3: figure out your path in life, and I think I

1067
01:01:39,680 --> 01:01:43,440
Speaker 3: kind of lost a little path of my life because

1068
01:01:43,880 --> 01:01:47,480
Speaker 3: I had something more important to like take over. And

1069
01:01:47,680 --> 01:01:52,360
Speaker 3: I think that the delay adolescence is something that I

1070
01:01:52,480 --> 01:01:55,440
Speaker 3: felt like even now, you know, I still feel like

1071
01:01:55,520 --> 01:01:58,680
Speaker 3: I'm a little bit youthful, even though I'm like creaking

1072
01:01:58,920 --> 01:02:02,640
Speaker 3: and pop in when I walk, you know, I still

1073
01:02:02,680 --> 01:02:06,680
Speaker 3: sometimes feel like I have a little bit more adolescence

1074
01:02:06,720 --> 01:02:09,560
Speaker 3: in me and still things to learn. And so as

1075
01:02:09,760 --> 01:02:14,360
Speaker 3: a teen, it was it was really challenging. And it

1076
01:02:14,520 --> 01:02:18,960
Speaker 3: was really one of those beautiful like voor Texas of

1077
01:02:20,760 --> 01:02:23,480
Speaker 3: being young and being able to keep up with a

1078
01:02:23,600 --> 01:02:27,080
Speaker 3: child and having that energy. So I was able to

1079
01:02:27,800 --> 01:02:31,400
Speaker 3: go to school. I went to a conservatory after so

1080
01:02:31,440 --> 01:02:34,760
Speaker 3: I would take her to school and when she started kindergarten,

1081
01:02:34,840 --> 01:02:37,720
Speaker 3: and then I would go to school, and then I

1082
01:02:37,760 --> 01:02:40,240
Speaker 3: would go to work, and then i'd come home and

1083
01:02:40,480 --> 01:02:43,440
Speaker 3: do her homework and put her to bed, then do

1084
01:02:43,520 --> 01:02:45,400
Speaker 3: my homework and do it all over. And I think

1085
01:02:45,400 --> 01:02:49,520
Speaker 3: about that now and I'm like, no way, no way.

1086
01:02:49,680 --> 01:02:51,720
Speaker 3: I'm like I have a hard time getting up for

1087
01:02:51,840 --> 01:02:54,040
Speaker 3: my little one now. So it was like I was

1088
01:02:54,080 --> 01:02:58,400
Speaker 3: way too young then, and I'm like way too old. No, no, no,

1089
01:02:58,720 --> 01:03:00,520
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. It was just like where

1090
01:03:00,640 --> 01:03:02,920
Speaker 3: was the sweet spot? I just kind of skimmed by

1091
01:03:02,960 --> 01:03:05,240
Speaker 3: it and you know, accepted the challenge.

1092
01:03:05,360 --> 01:03:09,600
Speaker 2: That's incredible. Moms are amazing moms across the world. My

1093
01:03:09,920 --> 01:03:17,120
Speaker 2: mom included just unbelievable resilience, unbelievable found tolerance. You know that.

1094
01:03:17,200 --> 01:03:20,600
Speaker 2: I mean that sounds like such an incredible journey. And

1095
01:03:20,680 --> 01:03:22,680
Speaker 2: you know, as you were telling me earlier, you haven't

1096
01:03:22,760 --> 01:03:26,280
Speaker 2: yet managed to watch the documentary. I've seen parts, but

1097
01:03:26,360 --> 01:03:29,720
Speaker 2: you haven't been able to bring yourself to actually watch it.

1098
01:03:29,760 --> 01:03:32,640
Speaker 2: Tell us about what that feels like and how hard

1099
01:03:32,680 --> 01:03:33,000
Speaker 2: that is.

1100
01:03:33,280 --> 01:03:36,400
Speaker 3: Well, first, everyone's telling me how fabulous is it is.

1101
01:03:36,480 --> 01:03:38,640
Speaker 3: So it's like making me, it's making me more and

1102
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:41,080
Speaker 3: more eager to kind of put that guard down. But

1103
01:03:41,560 --> 01:03:44,400
Speaker 3: the reason why is because like, we lived some of

1104
01:03:44,440 --> 01:03:47,680
Speaker 3: that together. We've went through that and we've found healing

1105
01:03:48,240 --> 01:03:51,600
Speaker 3: and we've moved past some of it. And even if

1106
01:03:51,800 --> 01:03:55,560
Speaker 3: it's something that she went through and I didn't know

1107
01:03:55,680 --> 01:03:58,480
Speaker 3: she went through it, it's as a mother, it's gonna

1108
01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:02,160
Speaker 3: affect me of like, oh, it's gonna hurt my stomach,

1109
01:04:02,200 --> 01:04:05,880
Speaker 3: it's gonna put me in that mindset and I'm gonna

1110
01:04:05,920 --> 01:04:09,480
Speaker 3: wish I could go and protect her. And she, you know,

1111
01:04:10,360 --> 01:04:14,720
Speaker 3: she was amazing and came through so much that I

1112
01:04:14,720 --> 01:04:17,720
Speaker 3: already feel like I protect you a lot. Yeah, And

1113
01:04:18,120 --> 01:04:20,160
Speaker 3: I was like, maybe I could just get through the

1114
01:04:20,200 --> 01:04:22,520
Speaker 3: holidays to not where I'm going up to her all

1115
01:04:22,560 --> 01:04:25,000
Speaker 3: the time, going I'm sorry, I didn't know, you know,

1116
01:04:25,000 --> 01:04:27,280
Speaker 3: because mothers do, like, you know, you want to take

1117
01:04:27,320 --> 01:04:30,080
Speaker 3: away your kids pain. You don't want them to have

1118
01:04:30,160 --> 01:04:34,280
Speaker 3: to experience that, even though that is part of developing

1119
01:04:34,320 --> 01:04:37,120
Speaker 3: who they're gonna be. And you know, who we all

1120
01:04:37,200 --> 01:04:40,040
Speaker 3: are is our pain and our suffering and our growth.

1121
01:04:40,480 --> 01:04:44,520
Speaker 3: So it's like, I either I'm gonna have to be

1122
01:04:44,640 --> 01:04:48,080
Speaker 3: in that mood where it's that time where I'm just

1123
01:04:48,120 --> 01:04:49,960
Speaker 3: like I'm not getting out of bed today and I

1124
01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:53,160
Speaker 3: already know I'm gonna be a little funky, and then

1125
01:04:53,240 --> 01:04:55,800
Speaker 3: watch it and then just be alone and kind of

1126
01:04:55,800 --> 01:04:58,240
Speaker 3: cry and then call her and tell her I'm sorry

1127
01:04:58,680 --> 01:05:01,400
Speaker 3: that I wasn't there and that moment, but you know,

1128
01:05:02,560 --> 01:05:06,840
Speaker 3: you just can't helicopter parent. So it just it just

1129
01:05:06,840 --> 01:05:10,760
Speaker 3: feels like her first breakup she ever had. I cried.

1130
01:05:11,200 --> 01:05:16,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like, they're both hurting, these four kids.

1131
01:05:16,640 --> 01:05:17,920
Speaker 3: I wish I could take their pa.

1132
01:05:17,880 --> 01:05:21,120
Speaker 1: Like our date was like a chaperone us to like

1133
01:05:21,440 --> 01:05:23,600
Speaker 1: the movies, like.

1134
01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:27,840
Speaker 3: They didn't make it.

1135
01:05:27,200 --> 01:05:30,520
Speaker 2: So mom's hot though, that's a mom's hot. Like unless

1136
01:05:30,520 --> 01:05:32,400
Speaker 2: you're a mom, you can't, you know, you know, it's

1137
01:05:33,120 --> 01:05:36,120
Speaker 2: it's hard to fully understand, like yeah, just everything you

1138
01:05:36,200 --> 01:05:38,920
Speaker 2: just said there of like wow, We've already lived through that,

1139
01:05:38,960 --> 01:05:41,520
Speaker 2: we've healed through that. To revisit that again, that's painful

1140
01:05:41,600 --> 01:05:44,720
Speaker 2: to feel a sense of guilt that I wasn't there

1141
01:05:44,760 --> 01:05:46,560
Speaker 2: for someone in a certain way. I didn't know what

1142
01:05:46,640 --> 01:05:49,880
Speaker 2: they were going through that Carrie's just saying, I mean, Selena,

1143
01:05:49,920 --> 01:05:51,439
Speaker 2: hearing that from your mom, Like, what does it feel

1144
01:05:51,440 --> 01:05:53,080
Speaker 2: like when she's like she hasn't been able to watch

1145
01:05:53,080 --> 01:05:54,600
Speaker 2: it because of all of this, how does that feel?

1146
01:05:54,640 --> 01:05:58,320
Speaker 1: Well, It's it's not far off. I've only seen it twice. Wow,

1147
01:05:59,040 --> 01:06:02,480
Speaker 1: And I I've premiered it a few times for people,

1148
01:06:02,640 --> 01:06:06,880
Speaker 1: and I've stepped away from watching it. I think I

1149
01:06:06,960 --> 01:06:11,640
Speaker 1: relate to my mom because some of those moments were

1150
01:06:11,760 --> 01:06:15,040
Speaker 1: really hard. And it's not so much if you don't

1151
01:06:15,040 --> 01:06:19,760
Speaker 1: mind me like saying this, it's not you not being there.

1152
01:06:19,880 --> 01:06:23,840
Speaker 1: It was me not letting you be there. That was

1153
01:06:23,960 --> 01:06:29,320
Speaker 1: the heartest part. And it was also not letting most

1154
01:06:29,360 --> 01:06:33,160
Speaker 1: of my people, like my family, in because I was

1155
01:06:33,200 --> 01:06:35,400
Speaker 1: in so much pain and I was walking through all

1156
01:06:35,440 --> 01:06:39,080
Speaker 1: these things. And in a way, I am glad that

1157
01:06:39,400 --> 01:06:41,760
Speaker 1: I walked through some of it alone because it made

1158
01:06:41,840 --> 01:06:43,680
Speaker 1: me who I am. But at the same time, it

1159
01:06:43,720 --> 01:06:45,800
Speaker 1: breaks my heart to know that I had to walk

1160
01:06:45,840 --> 01:06:48,400
Speaker 1: through that when I didn't need to do it alone.

1161
01:06:49,680 --> 01:06:53,760
Speaker 1: So it's very much I relate to her. I understand

1162
01:06:53,840 --> 01:06:56,800
Speaker 1: why she feels that way for sure, and I get it.

1163
01:06:56,920 --> 01:07:00,360
Speaker 2: So yeah, it's wonderful hearing both your perspectives on it

1164
01:07:00,400 --> 01:07:03,760
Speaker 2: because I think it again just you being him Andy,

1165
01:07:03,800 --> 01:07:05,720
Speaker 2: and I'm so grateful that you genuinely are here because

1166
01:07:05,760 --> 01:07:09,000
Speaker 2: it it just grounds this back into we're not watching

1167
01:07:09,000 --> 01:07:11,760
Speaker 2: a TV show, right, Like I think Alec did such

1168
01:07:11,760 --> 01:07:14,280
Speaker 2: a great job with it because I even though I'm

1169
01:07:14,320 --> 01:07:17,040
Speaker 2: not silling in his mother, it's like I can feel

1170
01:07:17,040 --> 01:07:21,120
Speaker 2: what you're saying through the way the story's told. But

1171
01:07:21,160 --> 01:07:23,400
Speaker 2: I think often when we watch things like this, we're like, oh, yeah,

1172
01:07:23,400 --> 01:07:25,480
Speaker 2: that's a TV show. It's not someone's life. And then

1173
01:07:25,520 --> 01:07:28,320
Speaker 2: when I'm sitting all of a sudden with you, I'm like,

1174
01:07:28,400 --> 01:07:30,440
Speaker 2: oh no, no, this is real life, Like this is

1175
01:07:30,440 --> 01:07:33,920
Speaker 2: someone's actual life and emotions, and that you know that

1176
01:07:35,120 --> 01:07:39,200
Speaker 2: having your voice in this conversation is so useful for that.

1177
01:07:39,880 --> 01:07:43,200
Speaker 3: Well, I mean I look at like kind of go

1178
01:07:43,320 --> 01:07:48,520
Speaker 3: when we're going to the premiere last night, I had

1179
01:07:48,560 --> 01:07:51,160
Speaker 3: a moment before where I was crying. I'm like, I'm

1180
01:07:51,200 --> 01:07:52,880
Speaker 3: going to need to cry and just get it over with,

1181
01:07:53,200 --> 01:07:55,880
Speaker 3: even though I was just there to support her and

1182
01:07:55,960 --> 01:08:00,840
Speaker 3: I didn't watch the film. The power and of fear,

1183
01:08:01,480 --> 01:08:04,680
Speaker 3: which I always call fear the false existence appearing real

1184
01:08:05,200 --> 01:08:09,720
Speaker 3: and so like the fear is like everyone is seeing

1185
01:08:09,760 --> 01:08:14,600
Speaker 3: you in your darkest moment and that it's out there

1186
01:08:14,600 --> 01:08:18,040
Speaker 3: for the world to judge, and they will judge it

1187
01:08:18,160 --> 01:08:22,200
Speaker 3: however they will, because even you know, again not seeing

1188
01:08:22,200 --> 01:08:25,400
Speaker 3: the documentary, I hear it's very real and raw and

1189
01:08:25,520 --> 01:08:30,080
Speaker 3: honest and open to do something like that. It's it's

1190
01:08:30,600 --> 01:08:34,000
Speaker 3: for me. I cry out of fear, of like how

1191
01:08:34,040 --> 01:08:37,120
Speaker 3: you were feeling and like how I could protect you.

1192
01:08:37,200 --> 01:08:39,800
Speaker 3: And then I was like, I know that the little

1193
01:08:39,800 --> 01:08:43,559
Speaker 3: bit I did in the interview, I was down a

1194
01:08:43,600 --> 01:08:46,040
Speaker 3: week afterwards because it did put me back in that

1195
01:08:46,160 --> 01:08:49,760
Speaker 3: place even though we weren't there, and I blacked out

1196
01:08:49,800 --> 01:08:52,760
Speaker 3: the minute, you know, Alex said action and he was

1197
01:08:52,880 --> 01:08:57,759
Speaker 3: so nice about it. And my lovely friend, dear friend Emily,

1198
01:08:58,080 --> 01:09:00,720
Speaker 3: who does my hair and makeup, she looks she's they're good.

1199
01:09:01,479 --> 01:09:02,840
Speaker 3: She's all crying and.

1200
01:09:02,960 --> 01:09:04,600
Speaker 2: She's like, I don't know.

1201
01:09:06,040 --> 01:09:09,479
Speaker 3: I'm like, well, now everyone's going to know, and there's

1202
01:09:09,520 --> 01:09:15,200
Speaker 3: something beautiful to that because it's you're exposing a lot,

1203
01:09:15,320 --> 01:09:18,280
Speaker 3: and that can be fearful, but you're also giving a lot,

1204
01:09:18,360 --> 01:09:20,920
Speaker 3: if that's how you look at it, and so I

1205
01:09:20,920 --> 01:09:24,000
Speaker 3: think it can make those dark moments really beautiful.

1206
01:09:24,360 --> 01:09:26,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, well, I think that's something you as a

1207
01:09:26,680 --> 01:09:31,280
Speaker 2: family seem to have definitely embodied the idea of using

1208
01:09:31,320 --> 01:09:34,080
Speaker 2: your pain to serve others, figuring out a way to

1209
01:09:34,120 --> 01:09:37,080
Speaker 2: make sure that these stories are not just told in silos,

1210
01:09:37,120 --> 01:09:39,880
Speaker 2: but they help other people feel connected. And you know,

1211
01:09:39,920 --> 01:09:42,559
Speaker 2: with what you're doing with Wonder Mine, like, tell us

1212
01:09:42,560 --> 01:09:45,840
Speaker 2: a bit about the mission behind why you founded that,

1213
01:09:45,960 --> 01:09:48,200
Speaker 2: why you brought that to life, because I feel it

1214
01:09:48,200 --> 01:09:50,760
Speaker 2: comes from the same place of like, we're going through

1215
01:09:50,760 --> 01:09:53,280
Speaker 2: these things personally, but we also know this is a

1216
01:09:53,320 --> 01:09:56,240
Speaker 2: collective global challenge and so we want to be a

1217
01:09:56,240 --> 01:09:58,280
Speaker 2: part of supporting those communities.

1218
01:09:58,600 --> 01:10:01,880
Speaker 3: When I was really young, uh, and I was about

1219
01:10:01,880 --> 01:10:05,479
Speaker 3: seven years old, I did have my first and only

1220
01:10:05,880 --> 01:10:12,360
Speaker 3: suicide attempt, however you say, and it it didn't happen

1221
01:10:12,600 --> 01:10:16,280
Speaker 3: obviously seven years old, and I think that with traces

1222
01:10:16,320 --> 01:10:20,360
Speaker 3: back the time of always not feeling like I like

1223
01:10:20,640 --> 01:10:23,160
Speaker 3: nothing around me made sense in my world, and it

1224
01:10:23,240 --> 01:10:25,800
Speaker 3: was just like I felt like I was, and you know,

1225
01:10:25,840 --> 01:10:28,719
Speaker 3: nothing bad was happening. It's just like this seems strong

1226
01:10:28,760 --> 01:10:31,639
Speaker 3: to me, this seems wrong to me, I seem wrong,

1227
01:10:31,920 --> 01:10:35,360
Speaker 3: Like how how do I fix this? But from that moment,

1228
01:10:35,840 --> 01:10:38,439
Speaker 3: I've always carried I think that moment in my life

1229
01:10:38,920 --> 01:10:41,639
Speaker 3: in my mind of like not wanting anyone to ever

1230
01:10:41,680 --> 01:10:44,920
Speaker 3: feel that way, which is what led us to Thirteen

1231
01:10:44,960 --> 01:10:48,639
Speaker 3: Reasons Why and some of her fans opening up to us.

1232
01:10:48,960 --> 01:10:50,680
Speaker 3: When I read that, I knew that needed to be

1233
01:10:50,720 --> 01:10:55,479
Speaker 3: a conversational piece, and from the response of what it

1234
01:10:55,960 --> 01:11:00,920
Speaker 3: did and opening those conversations, I fired me to do more.

1235
01:11:00,960 --> 01:11:04,320
Speaker 3: But it was like about the timing of what we

1236
01:11:04,360 --> 01:11:06,160
Speaker 3: wanted to do and how we're going to use it,

1237
01:11:06,200 --> 01:11:10,679
Speaker 3: and so collaborating and figuring out what's missing out there

1238
01:11:11,760 --> 01:11:15,680
Speaker 3: as a support system was the ecosystem that we're you know,

1239
01:11:15,800 --> 01:11:20,880
Speaker 3: planning and working entirely to create where all of it

1240
01:11:20,920 --> 01:11:24,880
Speaker 3: is cohesive and you have one place to go to

1241
01:11:24,960 --> 01:11:28,800
Speaker 3: see that you know, we actually target it really a

1242
01:11:28,800 --> 01:11:32,800
Speaker 3: filter of feelings, so everybody has feelings that might not

1243
01:11:32,920 --> 01:11:38,240
Speaker 3: be a diagnosed medical condition, but also how can we

1244
01:11:38,760 --> 01:11:42,679
Speaker 3: put out content every day that you know, keeps it light,

1245
01:11:43,160 --> 01:11:46,480
Speaker 3: but keeps it real and keeps it open for conversation

1246
01:11:46,960 --> 01:11:50,519
Speaker 3: and build a community where everyone will feel safe and

1247
01:11:50,600 --> 01:11:55,080
Speaker 3: not ashamed of like a feeling that they're having and

1248
01:11:55,240 --> 01:11:59,000
Speaker 3: not ashamed. I heard you guys talking about perfection.

1249
01:11:59,240 --> 01:12:00,600
Speaker 2: It's like, I.

1250
01:12:02,160 --> 01:12:05,800
Speaker 3: Don't like to pretend there is perfection, you know. I like,

1251
01:12:05,880 --> 01:12:08,920
Speaker 3: I think perfection kind of puts a little bit of

1252
01:12:10,240 --> 01:12:14,639
Speaker 3: pressure whenever you can just be, like, just be and

1253
01:12:14,760 --> 01:12:18,240
Speaker 3: like so, I you know, I'm not a big social

1254
01:12:18,280 --> 01:12:22,320
Speaker 3: media fan, but definitely go to wondermind where we share

1255
01:12:22,400 --> 01:12:26,840
Speaker 3: positive messages. But I think what you know inspired me

1256
01:12:27,560 --> 01:12:31,320
Speaker 3: was creating this for everyone and content for people to

1257
01:12:31,600 --> 01:12:35,439
Speaker 3: have access to that can afford to get treatment or

1258
01:12:35,920 --> 01:12:38,120
Speaker 3: don't need treatment, but they need someone to say, hey,

1259
01:12:38,240 --> 01:12:41,440
Speaker 3: check this out, you know. So it's really for everybody.

1260
01:12:41,680 --> 01:12:44,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you so much for sharing your personal experience, though,

1261
01:12:44,479 --> 01:12:48,160
Speaker 2: because I can imagine that you know the fact that

1262
01:12:48,240 --> 01:12:50,200
Speaker 2: you've held that close to you for this long and

1263
01:12:50,280 --> 01:12:53,080
Speaker 2: now that's coming out in this beautiful way, But when

1264
01:12:53,080 --> 01:12:57,519
Speaker 2: you're holding onto it, it doesn't feel that beautiful always.

1265
01:12:57,520 --> 01:12:59,679
Speaker 2: I mean, cele know, how old were you when you first.

1266
01:12:59,520 --> 01:13:03,839
Speaker 1: Learned about well, I don't think and this is probably

1267
01:13:03,840 --> 01:13:07,240
Speaker 1: fair enough to say, like she never really hid a

1268
01:13:07,280 --> 01:13:11,120
Speaker 1: lot of stuff when I was younger. I never was

1269
01:13:11,200 --> 01:13:14,000
Speaker 1: aware that we didn't have enough. I was never She

1270
01:13:14,120 --> 01:13:16,679
Speaker 1: did such a great job of I feel we're talking

1271
01:13:16,680 --> 01:13:19,000
Speaker 1: about you're in your right ear, But you did, Mama,

1272
01:13:19,160 --> 01:13:19,800
Speaker 1: You did of.

1273
01:13:20,280 --> 01:13:22,000
Speaker 3: Being was this woman you speak of.

1274
01:13:23,720 --> 01:13:27,200
Speaker 1: Like explaining situations to me that we would be in

1275
01:13:27,400 --> 01:13:33,839
Speaker 1: and and I feel around eighteen, I kind of started

1276
01:13:33,880 --> 01:13:37,960
Speaker 1: to realize more of her story and obviously it broke

1277
01:13:38,000 --> 01:13:40,400
Speaker 1: my heart and there are things that I never knew

1278
01:13:40,680 --> 01:13:43,760
Speaker 1: were going on, and she did such a great job

1279
01:13:43,800 --> 01:13:50,160
Speaker 1: of just letting me have a really great childhood. And

1280
01:13:50,200 --> 01:13:53,240
Speaker 1: then once I realized we could be open and honest

1281
01:13:53,280 --> 01:13:56,880
Speaker 1: with each other. That's kind of how Undermine started as well.

1282
01:13:57,000 --> 01:14:00,519
Speaker 1: We really, you know, ended up working together on an

1283
01:14:00,520 --> 01:14:05,479
Speaker 1: interview and we shared such interest with you know, the

1284
01:14:05,479 --> 01:14:07,920
Speaker 1: person I was interviewing with us, and we thought, hey,

1285
01:14:08,320 --> 01:14:12,840
Speaker 1: this is something we could probably do together. And it

1286
01:14:12,960 --> 01:14:15,439
Speaker 1: happened that way, and it was It's been really fun.

1287
01:14:16,040 --> 01:14:18,880
Speaker 3: I do want to I know this is like a

1288
01:14:18,960 --> 01:14:22,160
Speaker 3: love fest, but like I do want to. There's a

1289
01:14:22,240 --> 01:14:27,640
Speaker 3: moment that like you touched me during that time that

1290
01:14:27,760 --> 01:14:30,320
Speaker 3: I don't even know if you remember. I remember I

1291
01:14:30,360 --> 01:14:32,559
Speaker 3: was doing that, going to school, going to work, trying

1292
01:14:32,600 --> 01:14:36,080
Speaker 3: to get her out of the neighborhood I grew up

1293
01:14:36,120 --> 01:14:38,400
Speaker 3: in and tried to give her a better life. And

1294
01:14:38,760 --> 01:14:43,840
Speaker 3: this was pre her doing anything besides directing films with

1295
01:14:44,160 --> 01:14:47,640
Speaker 3: kids on the street. Yep, but she wasn't doing anything professionally.

1296
01:14:48,160 --> 01:14:50,040
Speaker 3: I was sitting in front of a mirror and I

1297
01:14:50,120 --> 01:14:52,160
Speaker 3: was trying to get ready and I just started crying

1298
01:14:52,680 --> 01:14:54,599
Speaker 3: and I was crying. I was crying, and she come

1299
01:14:54,680 --> 01:14:56,680
Speaker 3: up behind me, and she was so young, and she

1300
01:14:56,880 --> 01:15:01,080
Speaker 3: like started playing my hair, and she like, what's wrong?

1301
01:15:01,280 --> 01:15:03,800
Speaker 3: And I said, I just don't know why I'm doing

1302
01:15:03,840 --> 01:15:06,840
Speaker 3: what I'm doing, and she goes, you'll figure it out,

1303
01:15:07,040 --> 01:15:10,600
Speaker 3: just keep going. And it was like I was like,

1304
01:15:11,560 --> 01:15:17,400
Speaker 3: she's already smarter to be so yeah, It's like it's

1305
01:15:17,439 --> 01:15:20,519
Speaker 3: it was like a really good, like strong moment, like

1306
01:15:20,800 --> 01:15:24,320
Speaker 3: you don't ever want to you know. I think being

1307
01:15:24,439 --> 01:15:28,880
Speaker 3: vulnerable in front of her allows, you know, the vulnerability

1308
01:15:28,960 --> 01:15:30,440
Speaker 3: to you know, be welcomed.

1309
01:15:30,680 --> 01:15:33,600
Speaker 2: Yeah. Absolutely, Yeah, I think that's I think that's so

1310
01:15:33,720 --> 01:15:36,360
Speaker 2: true as we're growing up, it's like we often look

1311
01:15:36,360 --> 01:15:39,759
Speaker 2: at our parents as perfect unless they let us in. Yeah,

1312
01:15:40,040 --> 01:15:42,120
Speaker 2: or by the time you figure out that they're not.

1313
01:15:42,560 --> 01:15:46,400
Speaker 2: And it's interesting that you're saying that at least you

1314
01:15:46,400 --> 01:15:49,400
Speaker 2: felt you were just always open and honest with what

1315
01:15:49,439 --> 01:15:53,280
Speaker 2: you were going through and with with your own challenges

1316
01:15:53,280 --> 01:15:55,080
Speaker 2: and your own struggles when you're when you're going through

1317
01:15:55,120 --> 01:15:57,000
Speaker 2: your own stuff and you're watching your child go through

1318
01:15:57,000 --> 01:16:01,240
Speaker 2: their stuff, like what's going through there's mind in that situation,

1319
01:16:01,360 --> 01:16:04,240
Speaker 2: like how are you dealing with your own stresses and

1320
01:16:04,280 --> 01:16:08,360
Speaker 2: pains and trying to be there and often, as as

1321
01:16:08,360 --> 01:16:11,800
Speaker 2: Selena said, and you said, children don't want their parents

1322
01:16:11,880 --> 01:16:14,360
Speaker 2: involved at a certain time, right, Like I can relate

1323
01:16:14,360 --> 01:16:16,760
Speaker 2: to that completely, Like I think you know, I listened

1324
01:16:16,800 --> 01:16:18,640
Speaker 2: to everything my parents said up until like I was

1325
01:16:18,720 --> 01:16:22,360
Speaker 2: thirteen years old, and then from like thirteen to twenty five,

1326
01:16:22,400 --> 01:16:23,920
Speaker 2: I didn't want to hear from them. And then after

1327
01:16:23,960 --> 01:16:27,080
Speaker 2: twenty five, I was like, oh, you guys were the best, right, Yeah,

1328
01:16:27,120 --> 01:16:29,320
Speaker 2: you're right, but everything and you go through that journey,

1329
01:16:29,360 --> 01:16:32,120
Speaker 2: so you know when your child doesn't want your help,

1330
01:16:32,160 --> 01:16:34,479
Speaker 2: when your child is not allowing you in, like what

1331
01:16:34,640 --> 01:16:36,880
Speaker 2: goes through a parent's mind, especially when they're going through

1332
01:16:36,960 --> 01:16:38,560
Speaker 2: their own work themselves.

1333
01:16:38,800 --> 01:16:45,280
Speaker 3: I just needed more therapy in a feeling, and you

1334
01:16:45,439 --> 01:16:50,800
Speaker 3: feel because I want to use this term lightly, like

1335
01:16:51,160 --> 01:16:55,120
Speaker 3: you feel like you feled in some capacity. So then

1336
01:16:55,200 --> 01:16:58,920
Speaker 3: you're like, I know, I took that opportunity to try

1337
01:16:58,960 --> 01:17:02,320
Speaker 3: to see maybe where were the missteps I took as

1338
01:17:02,320 --> 01:17:05,080
Speaker 3: a parent. Was I too open with her? Was I

1339
01:17:05,120 --> 01:17:08,600
Speaker 3: too liberal with her? Or you know, should I not

1340
01:17:08,880 --> 01:17:12,360
Speaker 3: let her do Barney? You know, like it's just all

1341
01:17:12,400 --> 01:17:17,960
Speaker 3: these decisions that you know, you make, you just reflect on,

1342
01:17:18,280 --> 01:17:23,400
Speaker 3: and I think I think as parents we have this

1343
01:17:23,520 --> 01:17:30,759
Speaker 3: capacity to decompartmentize your feelings and then prioritizing everyone else's.

1344
01:17:30,800 --> 01:17:33,400
Speaker 3: Like I was telling you earlier when we were talking,

1345
01:17:33,760 --> 01:17:38,599
Speaker 3: it was it's easier to bury your stuff and then

1346
01:17:38,720 --> 01:17:42,440
Speaker 3: kind of focus, which then becomes unhealthy for the receiving

1347
01:17:42,479 --> 01:17:46,320
Speaker 3: party and for yourself because you're not taking care of yourself.

1348
01:17:46,920 --> 01:17:52,559
Speaker 3: So I was. I went through it. A lot of days,

1349
01:17:52,560 --> 01:17:55,160
Speaker 3: didn't get out of bed. There was just like a

1350
01:17:55,200 --> 01:17:58,080
Speaker 3: lot of crying, a lot of therapy. And I had

1351
01:17:58,400 --> 01:18:02,160
Speaker 3: a therapist because I also I had a miscarriage during

1352
01:18:02,560 --> 01:18:05,840
Speaker 3: the madness, And you know, I had this therapist who

1353
01:18:05,880 --> 01:18:09,280
Speaker 3: gave me the best advice ever. She's like, just I

1354
01:18:09,320 --> 01:18:11,920
Speaker 3: need you to leave your house once a day and

1355
01:18:12,400 --> 01:18:14,479
Speaker 3: go go to the movies, buy a ticket. I don't

1356
01:18:14,479 --> 01:18:16,720
Speaker 3: care if you watch it, but every day you need

1357
01:18:16,800 --> 01:18:20,000
Speaker 3: receipts that you left your house. And so I would

1358
01:18:20,000 --> 01:18:22,880
Speaker 3: like walk through them all just like crying, being lost

1359
01:18:23,040 --> 01:18:25,559
Speaker 3: and you know, not knowing what to do. And I

1360
01:18:25,600 --> 01:18:27,400
Speaker 3: would buy stuff and I'd have to go and take

1361
01:18:27,400 --> 01:18:30,400
Speaker 3: it to her in each session, and I didn't I

1362
01:18:30,400 --> 01:18:32,000
Speaker 3: didn't even ask for the purpose. I was like, she's

1363
01:18:32,000 --> 01:18:33,559
Speaker 3: just trying to get me to get out of the house.

1364
01:18:34,080 --> 01:18:39,280
Speaker 3: And then I realized the whole Like after about six

1365
01:18:39,320 --> 01:18:43,080
Speaker 3: weeks of doing that, I started feeling more comfortable with

1366
01:18:44,000 --> 01:18:47,360
Speaker 3: being even more vulnerable because I'm crying and I know

1367
01:18:47,400 --> 01:18:49,920
Speaker 3: the world's going to be okay, and nobody's judging me.

1368
01:18:50,200 --> 01:18:53,080
Speaker 3: People are asking me, hey, are you okay that kind

1369
01:18:53,160 --> 01:18:54,400
Speaker 3: of thing, and you know, I was just like no,

1370
01:18:55,120 --> 01:18:56,960
Speaker 3: and then you know, you just keep walking. But like

1371
01:18:57,360 --> 01:19:00,599
Speaker 3: that judgment that everybody's afraid of. It shows me that,

1372
01:19:01,080 --> 01:19:03,840
Speaker 3: you know, because I was mad that I felt as

1373
01:19:04,160 --> 01:19:06,120
Speaker 3: a mother and this is in my eyes, not like you,

1374
01:19:06,120 --> 01:19:09,160
Speaker 3: you know, like I felt as Selena's mother. And then

1375
01:19:09,280 --> 01:19:12,439
Speaker 3: I also my body hurt my other baby. So I

1376
01:19:12,479 --> 01:19:16,080
Speaker 3: was like angry at myself completely and I needed to

1377
01:19:16,160 --> 01:19:20,120
Speaker 3: see that oh, the world's alive and there is forgiveness

1378
01:19:20,640 --> 01:19:25,160
Speaker 3: and I can still find happiness for myself because I

1379
01:19:25,280 --> 01:19:28,360
Speaker 3: was just like being a mom with something and the

1380
01:19:28,400 --> 01:19:30,760
Speaker 3: only thing I really knew to do since the age

1381
01:19:30,760 --> 01:19:37,320
Speaker 3: of fifteen. So when that's gone, you're you're just like, oh,

1382
01:19:37,439 --> 01:19:42,080
Speaker 3: I'm supposed to have all mees that don't tell my child,

1383
01:19:42,880 --> 01:19:46,200
Speaker 3: I'm supposed to do things, you know. So it was

1384
01:19:46,560 --> 01:19:50,080
Speaker 3: a lot of growing, you know, and it's hard when

1385
01:19:50,080 --> 01:19:52,000
Speaker 3: you're in it, but when you get out of it,

1386
01:19:52,000 --> 01:19:56,759
Speaker 3: it's fantastic. It really is. It's just you feel lighter

1387
01:19:56,840 --> 01:20:00,479
Speaker 3: and you feel like more hopeful, you know, and that

1388
01:20:00,600 --> 01:20:04,160
Speaker 3: then when you have that next opportunity or that next

1389
01:20:04,360 --> 01:20:07,720
Speaker 3: you know, downtrodden moment, you know you're going to get

1390
01:20:07,760 --> 01:20:09,559
Speaker 3: out of it. It's like, all right, I just got

1391
01:20:09,560 --> 01:20:11,920
Speaker 3: to get through this, just got to figure it out,

1392
01:20:12,040 --> 01:20:16,479
Speaker 3: gotta vibe through it, and then it'll it will pass. Yeah,

1393
01:20:16,680 --> 01:20:19,479
Speaker 3: So I think, yeah, you were talking about rock bottom

1394
01:20:19,640 --> 01:20:23,639
Speaker 3: a little bit earlier. Yeah, definitely hitting rock bottom it does.

1395
01:20:23,760 --> 01:20:25,400
Speaker 3: It feels like you're breaking through.

1396
01:20:26,000 --> 01:20:28,479
Speaker 2: What's really refreshing hearing both of you together is just

1397
01:20:28,800 --> 01:20:30,559
Speaker 2: I feel like this is going to heal a lot

1398
01:20:30,560 --> 01:20:34,439
Speaker 2: of parent children relationships. Like listening to you both today

1399
01:20:34,479 --> 01:20:39,200
Speaker 2: because I'm just thinking so often we think our thoughts

1400
01:20:39,280 --> 01:20:42,920
Speaker 2: to ourselves and we never share them with the people

1401
01:20:42,960 --> 01:20:45,800
Speaker 2: that those thoughts are about. So, you know, I'm sure

1402
01:20:45,800 --> 01:20:48,760
Speaker 2: there's so many children out there who their thoughts are like, oh,

1403
01:20:48,800 --> 01:20:51,160
Speaker 2: I wish my parents did this better and my parents

1404
01:20:51,200 --> 01:20:54,000
Speaker 2: could have done this, and those are valid thoughts. And

1405
01:20:54,000 --> 01:20:56,320
Speaker 2: then there's parents out there at the same time having

1406
01:20:56,320 --> 01:20:58,160
Speaker 2: the same thought of like I wish I didn't do

1407
01:20:58,240 --> 01:21:00,519
Speaker 2: that to them and I you know, and often we

1408
01:21:00,640 --> 01:21:03,120
Speaker 2: just never find out. We never know because we don't

1409
01:21:03,120 --> 01:21:06,559
Speaker 2: get to have these open, honest dialogues. And so I

1410
01:21:06,640 --> 01:21:09,840
Speaker 2: really think this, on top of everything you do, this

1411
01:21:09,920 --> 01:21:12,280
Speaker 2: is really going to inspire a lot of parents and kids. Yeah,

1412
01:21:12,320 --> 01:21:15,680
Speaker 2: it's because it's even even listening to you, I'm just

1413
01:21:15,880 --> 01:21:17,840
Speaker 2: I'm thinking of my parents, and I'm thinking of my

1414
01:21:17,880 --> 01:21:21,880
Speaker 2: friends parents, and I'm thinking everyone needs to be able

1415
01:21:21,920 --> 01:21:26,559
Speaker 2: to open their heart because somewhere everyone's painting themselves the villain,

1416
01:21:26,600 --> 01:21:29,920
Speaker 2: and someone's painting themselves as the person who messed up

1417
01:21:29,960 --> 01:21:34,040
Speaker 2: and got everything wrong. Yeah, and in our head we're thinking, oh,

1418
01:21:34,080 --> 01:21:36,240
Speaker 2: they got away with it, or you know, they're not

1419
01:21:36,280 --> 01:21:40,160
Speaker 2: aware of it, So I find I mean, did you

1420
01:21:40,200 --> 01:21:42,320
Speaker 2: were you always open to therapy and always open to

1421
01:21:42,320 --> 01:21:43,960
Speaker 2: this self work? Was that a part of who you

1422
01:21:44,000 --> 01:21:46,880
Speaker 2: were as well? Always? And that was or was that

1423
01:21:47,000 --> 01:21:48,400
Speaker 2: something you kind of turned to it a.

1424
01:21:48,280 --> 01:21:51,599
Speaker 3: Certain well, I will tell you a haunting little secret

1425
01:21:51,720 --> 01:21:55,040
Speaker 3: that when I was really young in junior high, I

1426
01:21:55,120 --> 01:21:59,680
Speaker 3: wanted to be a criminal psychologist. So that's why I

1427
01:21:59,680 --> 01:22:04,000
Speaker 3: always says that she's making fun of me and murders. Maybe, yes,

1428
01:22:04,200 --> 01:22:08,880
Speaker 3: that was I young that person, but I was already

1429
01:22:08,920 --> 01:22:11,960
Speaker 3: reading on serial killers at that age because I was

1430
01:22:12,000 --> 01:22:17,400
Speaker 3: fascinated with the mindset and I didn't come from, you know,

1431
01:22:17,520 --> 01:22:21,599
Speaker 3: an environment where therapy was even talked about, but I

1432
01:22:21,720 --> 01:22:25,080
Speaker 3: just at at a certain age, I really felt like

1433
01:22:25,200 --> 01:22:27,360
Speaker 3: super depressed, and so I had to go out and

1434
01:22:27,439 --> 01:22:30,680
Speaker 3: explore it myself and go through tons of doctors, and

1435
01:22:31,280 --> 01:22:33,360
Speaker 3: you know, you would say one thing and it was

1436
01:22:33,439 --> 01:22:36,120
Speaker 3: just like they go, hey, are you seeing things? I'm like,

1437
01:22:36,280 --> 01:22:38,920
Speaker 3: I saw Black Butterfly the other day and they go, oh,

1438
01:22:39,120 --> 01:22:42,160
Speaker 3: so you're hallucinating, and I'm like am I? So like

1439
01:22:42,320 --> 01:22:44,200
Speaker 3: I had to go and I wasn't, but it was

1440
01:22:44,240 --> 01:22:47,640
Speaker 3: a real black Butterfly, So I had to learn like

1441
01:22:47,800 --> 01:22:53,200
Speaker 3: how to understand myself and my mind on my own.

1442
01:22:53,479 --> 01:22:58,000
Speaker 3: And finally I also I did I went away to

1443
01:22:58,040 --> 01:22:59,880
Speaker 3: a facility and it was the first time I got

1444
01:23:00,080 --> 01:23:04,160
Speaker 3: to really spend all that time. Is best twenty eight

1445
01:23:04,240 --> 01:23:10,840
Speaker 3: days that I spent, you know, on myself and yeah,

1446
01:23:10,960 --> 01:23:14,120
Speaker 3: you just like you have to kind of build that

1447
01:23:14,200 --> 01:23:18,360
Speaker 3: relationship with your mind. And I think people are so

1448
01:23:18,560 --> 01:23:23,479
Speaker 3: afraid of being honest with themselves because then they have

1449
01:23:23,560 --> 01:23:26,960
Speaker 3: to face it. But what like helped me is I realized,

1450
01:23:27,040 --> 01:23:30,760
Speaker 3: like you know, in this relationship, I was parenting her

1451
01:23:30,800 --> 01:23:33,840
Speaker 3: the way I needed to be parented, not what she

1452
01:23:33,960 --> 01:23:38,080
Speaker 3: was needing. And that is how I feel like I

1453
01:23:38,240 --> 01:23:42,200
Speaker 3: made my contribution to healing this relationship. Is like, Okay,

1454
01:23:42,200 --> 01:23:45,639
Speaker 3: pull back. I need to know her and her needs,

1455
01:23:45,800 --> 01:23:49,760
Speaker 3: not like be the mama bear, even though I still

1456
01:23:49,800 --> 01:23:52,920
Speaker 3: haven't lost that completely, but like you know, sometimes I

1457
01:23:53,000 --> 01:23:57,120
Speaker 3: just need to listen and not fix it. And so

1458
01:23:57,880 --> 01:24:01,320
Speaker 3: that was the biggest thing. I think I really went

1459
01:24:01,360 --> 01:24:03,880
Speaker 3: on a little tel spin there, but that was the

1460
01:24:03,880 --> 01:24:07,599
Speaker 3: biggest thing that I learned through you know, that whole

1461
01:24:07,640 --> 01:24:11,160
Speaker 3: time that we were separated. It was like seeing who

1462
01:24:11,320 --> 01:24:14,800
Speaker 3: I was and how other people see me and I

1463
01:24:15,120 --> 01:24:17,240
Speaker 3: do that every day I'll say something, I'm like, Okay,

1464
01:24:17,800 --> 01:24:19,720
Speaker 3: how did that come off to someone else? You know,

1465
01:24:19,760 --> 01:24:23,360
Speaker 3: because I have ADHD, so I'm quick to like spurt

1466
01:24:23,400 --> 01:24:25,160
Speaker 3: out whatever is in my brain. And then I'm like,

1467
01:24:25,560 --> 01:24:28,880
Speaker 3: they really didn't need to know that, but it's out

1468
01:24:28,920 --> 01:24:29,840
Speaker 3: there in the world now.

1469
01:24:30,120 --> 01:24:35,040
Speaker 2: The self work in this room is amazing. The amount

1470
01:24:35,120 --> 01:24:37,960
Speaker 2: of like self reflection and self awareness in this room

1471
01:24:38,080 --> 01:24:41,120
Speaker 2: is really strong. This is yeah, yeah, this is very

1472
01:24:41,160 --> 01:24:43,720
Speaker 2: powerful stuff. No, and you did not get lost on

1473
01:24:43,760 --> 01:24:46,760
Speaker 2: attendent at all. I think everything you just shared with us,

1474
01:24:47,040 --> 01:24:50,000
Speaker 2: even you just coming to that conclusion of knowing that

1475
01:24:50,040 --> 01:24:53,160
Speaker 2: you're parenting someone that you deeply loved in a way

1476
01:24:53,160 --> 01:24:55,680
Speaker 2: that you wanted to be parented, I think that is

1477
01:24:55,680 --> 01:24:59,080
Speaker 2: at the core of so much of how we all live. Yeah. Right,

1478
01:24:59,160 --> 01:25:02,080
Speaker 2: We're all love people the way we wish we were loved,

1479
01:25:02,120 --> 01:25:04,800
Speaker 2: and we're all hurting people the way we wish we

1480
01:25:04,800 --> 01:25:10,679
Speaker 2: weren't hurt. And it's so it's just fascinating when we finally,

1481
01:25:11,479 --> 01:25:14,720
Speaker 2: you know, look beneath the surface and uncover why it's

1482
01:25:14,760 --> 01:25:17,120
Speaker 2: all there and where it is, and to do that

1483
01:25:17,560 --> 01:25:19,880
Speaker 2: together and separately. I love this idea that there were

1484
01:25:19,880 --> 01:25:21,679
Speaker 2: times when you have to do this at a distance

1485
01:25:21,720 --> 01:25:23,960
Speaker 2: from each other as well. I think that's such a

1486
01:25:23,960 --> 01:25:27,040
Speaker 2: healthy message to be out there as well. In the world,

1487
01:25:27,120 --> 01:25:28,840
Speaker 2: I think we're often all trying to solve all our

1488
01:25:28,880 --> 01:25:30,240
Speaker 2: issues in the same place.

1489
01:25:30,479 --> 01:25:34,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely. I think there are moments, even you know,

1490
01:25:35,160 --> 01:25:38,479
Speaker 1: even in friendships, where it wasn't necessary for me to

1491
01:25:38,520 --> 01:25:42,960
Speaker 1: take a step back and figure out what is serving me,

1492
01:25:43,120 --> 01:25:47,720
Speaker 1: what's not serving me, what makes me happy, what's challenging me,

1493
01:25:47,960 --> 01:25:51,120
Speaker 1: what's helping me move forward, versus what's not.

1494
01:25:51,680 --> 01:25:52,960
Speaker 3: I think it's really important.

1495
01:25:53,360 --> 01:25:55,360
Speaker 2: I think when we're looking from the outside in, we

1496
01:25:55,960 --> 01:26:02,719
Speaker 2: limit people to certain experiences, we remember them for certain people,

1497
01:26:02,760 --> 01:26:05,000
Speaker 2: we expect them to be with people that they're meant

1498
01:26:05,040 --> 01:26:08,640
Speaker 2: to be around, the way families are meant to be,

1499
01:26:08,800 --> 01:26:12,040
Speaker 2: Like there's always meant to be. Yeah, and then it's like,

1500
01:26:12,160 --> 01:26:15,920
Speaker 2: well know, in reality, there's space, there's distance, there's reflection,

1501
01:26:16,080 --> 01:26:20,280
Speaker 2: there's the need for all of these things. With the

1502
01:26:20,320 --> 01:26:22,160
Speaker 2: work that you're talking about earlier with me as well,

1503
01:26:22,200 --> 01:26:25,799
Speaker 2: in terms of how you now taking these messages on screen, yeah,

1504
01:26:25,880 --> 01:26:27,760
Speaker 2: you know, which you're sharing, which I know is such

1505
01:26:27,760 --> 01:26:30,240
Speaker 2: a big part of the work, and I feel so

1506
01:26:30,280 --> 01:26:32,599
Speaker 2: excited about that, Like That fills me with the greatest

1507
01:26:32,600 --> 01:26:35,519
Speaker 2: amount of joy knowing that we're going to see better

1508
01:26:35,560 --> 01:26:39,800
Speaker 2: representation of mental health on screen. I think that's huge.

1509
01:26:41,479 --> 01:26:44,559
Speaker 2: Where did you start to realize that from Thirteen Reasons Why,

1510
01:26:44,600 --> 01:26:46,280
Speaker 2: as we spoke about earlier, like, where did you start

1511
01:26:46,320 --> 01:26:49,240
Speaker 2: to realize that was so important for people to see

1512
01:26:49,240 --> 01:26:50,599
Speaker 2: that representation on screen?

1513
01:26:51,080 --> 01:26:54,599
Speaker 3: Well, I think it comes back to not wanting people

1514
01:26:54,680 --> 01:26:57,559
Speaker 3: to feel like I did at seven years old. It's like,

1515
01:26:58,280 --> 01:27:01,920
Speaker 3: I'm so open like with you know, oh, I'm bipolar,

1516
01:27:02,360 --> 01:27:05,200
Speaker 3: I have ADHD. You know, I was misdiagnosed for a while,

1517
01:27:05,560 --> 01:27:08,120
Speaker 3: so like I was always so open with it, and

1518
01:27:08,800 --> 01:27:12,280
Speaker 3: you know, even in a town where they're so accepting

1519
01:27:12,680 --> 01:27:17,799
Speaker 3: in certain capacities, it's still like, well she she's not stable.

1520
01:27:17,960 --> 01:27:19,799
Speaker 3: And I even would joke and go, yeah, I'm crazy,

1521
01:27:19,880 --> 01:27:24,560
Speaker 3: I'm crazy. I'm crazy. And I was like not supporting

1522
01:27:24,600 --> 01:27:28,280
Speaker 3: myself in that, and I didn't want anybody to feel

1523
01:27:28,320 --> 01:27:32,479
Speaker 3: that way. So, you know, during Thirteen Reasons Why, we

1524
01:27:32,520 --> 01:27:36,000
Speaker 3: worked tiresly the entire team to make sure we were

1525
01:27:36,040 --> 01:27:40,200
Speaker 3: executing the whole point of it in that you know,

1526
01:27:40,280 --> 01:27:45,000
Speaker 3: we're losing teens every day to suicide and it's it's

1527
01:27:45,040 --> 01:27:48,519
Speaker 3: horrible and unnecessary and you know, how do we how

1528
01:27:49,000 --> 01:27:52,080
Speaker 3: can we as a adult, And that's why it was

1529
01:27:52,080 --> 01:27:54,640
Speaker 3: so important, I think for me and Selena to go

1530
01:27:54,720 --> 01:27:57,320
Speaker 3: out and talk about it so parents would watch it together,

1531
01:27:57,800 --> 01:28:01,960
Speaker 3: you know. And once that got the reaction it got,

1532
01:28:02,280 --> 01:28:05,479
Speaker 3: you know, I heard different opinions, and I wanted to

1533
01:28:05,520 --> 01:28:08,280
Speaker 3: hear everyone whether they thought it was a bad idea,

1534
01:28:08,360 --> 01:28:12,280
Speaker 3: a great idea, it touched them, it offended them. Like

1535
01:28:12,360 --> 01:28:17,720
Speaker 3: I really like listen to everything and all the you know, data,

1536
01:28:17,760 --> 01:28:21,720
Speaker 3: and I've always been someone who enjoyed storytelling, and so

1537
01:28:22,800 --> 01:28:27,400
Speaker 3: I like to tell stories and if I can, you know,

1538
01:28:27,640 --> 01:28:29,840
Speaker 3: show and like I was telling you earlier, I like

1539
01:28:29,960 --> 01:28:33,479
Speaker 3: using silver Lining's playbook because they're bipolar, but they're having

1540
01:28:33,479 --> 01:28:36,800
Speaker 3: a life, they're having a relationship and as it may

1541
01:28:36,880 --> 01:28:40,360
Speaker 3: come with challenges, every relationship comes with challenges. It's not

1542
01:28:40,600 --> 01:28:45,559
Speaker 3: just a mental mental issue that someone has that causes

1543
01:28:45,600 --> 01:28:49,200
Speaker 3: those challenges. We're all people and if we just learn

1544
01:28:49,360 --> 01:28:52,960
Speaker 3: to understand each other, they'll be less fear of it,

1545
01:28:53,479 --> 01:28:56,240
Speaker 3: and then people will get more treatment and they'll just

1546
01:28:56,320 --> 01:28:59,760
Speaker 3: be more happiness. And I know, sometimes I feel like

1547
01:29:00,200 --> 01:29:04,360
Speaker 3: being like the world's gonna be happy. You know kind

1548
01:29:04,439 --> 01:29:08,440
Speaker 3: of like that, but you know and again like my adolescence,

1549
01:29:08,520 --> 01:29:13,160
Speaker 3: that's still there. But I that's what inspires me is

1550
01:29:13,320 --> 01:29:17,920
Speaker 3: to I scared off people by talking about myself in

1551
01:29:17,960 --> 01:29:23,280
Speaker 3: a negative way and by you know, not sharing enough,

1552
01:29:23,320 --> 01:29:26,160
Speaker 3: so it's like or sharing too much. So then it's

1553
01:29:26,200 --> 01:29:29,839
Speaker 3: like navigating that and like you know, like I mentioned

1554
01:29:29,920 --> 01:29:32,760
Speaker 3: like when It Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and girl

1555
01:29:32,800 --> 01:29:37,400
Speaker 3: interrupted favorite films, love them, but that's not the reality

1556
01:29:37,920 --> 01:29:40,920
Speaker 3: Selena or I live in every day. You know, I

1557
01:29:40,960 --> 01:29:44,559
Speaker 3: have been in a facility, and but it was not

1558
01:29:44,720 --> 01:29:50,040
Speaker 3: like what's being portrayed was. It was a beautiful experience

1559
01:29:50,200 --> 01:29:53,280
Speaker 3: and and made me a better person for it. So

1560
01:29:54,040 --> 01:29:58,120
Speaker 3: it just like media loves to, you know, tell all

1561
01:29:58,160 --> 01:30:00,320
Speaker 3: of the bad stuff. It's like we could use it

1562
01:30:00,360 --> 01:30:04,519
Speaker 3: as as like educational without preachy, and so like let's

1563
01:30:04,560 --> 01:30:07,920
Speaker 3: just tell stories of real people dealing with mental health

1564
01:30:07,960 --> 01:30:13,080
Speaker 3: issues and different capacities and show that you can that

1565
01:30:13,160 --> 01:30:16,439
Speaker 3: you're all right, You're gonna make it. It's like, and

1566
01:30:16,479 --> 01:30:22,640
Speaker 3: you just need to give yourself that that permission, and

1567
01:30:22,680 --> 01:30:26,160
Speaker 3: then once you give yourself that permission, you're gonna come

1568
01:30:26,200 --> 01:30:29,720
Speaker 3: out a happier person. I like I embrace my ADHD

1569
01:30:30,080 --> 01:30:33,240
Speaker 3: like I really do. We have a lot of fun together.

1570
01:30:35,280 --> 01:30:37,519
Speaker 2: Well, I think this is painting a beautiful picture of

1571
01:30:37,600 --> 01:30:40,000
Speaker 2: just how like we always want growth to be this

1572
01:30:40,720 --> 01:30:44,880
Speaker 2: perfect line, you know, we expect expect growth in families

1573
01:30:44,960 --> 01:30:48,679
Speaker 2: individually to just look like, oh, we're just all growing

1574
01:30:48,720 --> 01:30:51,840
Speaker 2: at the same time, and isn't this beautiful? And it's like, well, no,

1575
01:30:51,960 --> 01:30:55,320
Speaker 2: growth is not that way. Yeah, And growth is being

1576
01:30:55,360 --> 01:30:58,600
Speaker 2: patient when my daughter wants to grow this way and

1577
01:30:58,880 --> 01:31:00,600
Speaker 2: I'm trying to figure this out, or I'm going to

1578
01:31:00,640 --> 01:31:04,120
Speaker 2: be patient while my mom pivots and shifts, and that's

1579
01:31:04,160 --> 01:31:06,439
Speaker 2: what growth is. Growth is being patient with each other.

1580
01:31:06,520 --> 01:31:10,040
Speaker 2: And growth is holding space and being okay when we're

1581
01:31:10,040 --> 01:31:12,599
Speaker 2: not being the nicest people to each other. Like, there's

1582
01:31:12,600 --> 01:31:14,000
Speaker 2: so much more to growth, and so I want to

1583
01:31:14,000 --> 01:31:16,760
Speaker 2: thank you both for displaying that and sharing that with

1584
01:31:16,840 --> 01:31:21,280
Speaker 2: us today. Oh thank you because it's yeah, it's it's

1585
01:31:21,320 --> 01:31:25,120
Speaker 2: special seeing it from this perspective for sure, Rather than

1586
01:31:25,120 --> 01:31:28,080
Speaker 2: either or. We end every on Purpose episode with a

1587
01:31:28,120 --> 01:31:30,240
Speaker 2: final five, which we're gonna ask to both of you,

1588
01:31:31,080 --> 01:31:34,599
Speaker 2: so you'll do one question at a time each and

1589
01:31:34,680 --> 01:31:38,040
Speaker 2: these are one word to one sentence maximum. They are

1590
01:31:38,080 --> 01:31:41,280
Speaker 2: not questions like what's your favorite color? Promise, They're all

1591
01:31:41,280 --> 01:31:45,840
Speaker 2: thoughtful questions as you would expect. Okay, so question number

1592
01:31:45,840 --> 01:31:49,719
Speaker 2: one is what is the best advice you've ever received

1593
01:31:50,360 --> 01:31:52,439
Speaker 2: or heard when it comes to mental health.

1594
01:31:53,040 --> 01:31:55,040
Speaker 1: I'm sure it's like in a Brene Brown book.

1595
01:31:55,800 --> 01:31:58,559
Speaker 3: I'm right on my roof.

1596
01:31:59,040 --> 01:32:01,599
Speaker 1: I think though, the best advice I had been given

1597
01:32:01,720 --> 01:32:06,800
Speaker 1: is probably what I have thoroughly said throughout my documentary

1598
01:32:06,880 --> 01:32:13,920
Speaker 1: and speaking with you, is learning how to make it

1599
01:32:14,000 --> 01:32:16,360
Speaker 1: a part of your life. Like that's why I say

1600
01:32:16,479 --> 01:32:20,760
Speaker 1: make it your friend, because I think you have to

1601
01:32:20,880 --> 01:32:26,719
Speaker 1: understand why. And sometimes you may not always know why.

1602
01:32:27,520 --> 01:32:30,640
Speaker 1: But if you can understand that it's a feeling, like

1603
01:32:30,680 --> 01:32:34,280
Speaker 1: my mom said, where maybe this will pass and maybe

1604
01:32:34,280 --> 01:32:35,920
Speaker 1: you just got to go through it, and you have

1605
01:32:36,000 --> 01:32:38,040
Speaker 1: to have the day in bed crying. You have to

1606
01:32:38,120 --> 01:32:41,720
Speaker 1: do those things in order to figure out what it

1607
01:32:41,760 --> 01:32:43,400
Speaker 1: is that's going to set you free from it.

1608
01:32:44,920 --> 01:32:48,640
Speaker 3: Maybe that would be advice that's make you a practice. Yeah,

1609
01:32:49,320 --> 01:32:54,040
Speaker 3: I think mine was take your time. That was what

1610
01:32:54,080 --> 01:32:56,920
Speaker 3: I was told when I went to That's Tree. Yeah,

1611
01:32:57,040 --> 01:32:57,599
Speaker 3: take your time.

1612
01:32:57,680 --> 01:32:58,360
Speaker 1: It's really good.

1613
01:32:58,680 --> 01:32:59,120
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1614
01:32:59,240 --> 01:33:01,000
Speaker 2: What's some of that second question? What's some of the

1615
01:33:01,040 --> 01:33:04,639
Speaker 2: worst advice you've ever heard or received when it comes

1616
01:33:04,680 --> 01:33:05,360
Speaker 2: to mental health.

1617
01:33:05,840 --> 01:33:07,720
Speaker 3: That it's all in my head and I can just

1618
01:33:07,800 --> 01:33:11,599
Speaker 3: control it, like stop having bad thoughts.

1619
01:33:11,840 --> 01:33:15,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I was good to say somewhere along the

1620
01:33:15,400 --> 01:33:20,559
Speaker 1: lines of like you're fine. I mean yeah. I had

1621
01:33:20,640 --> 01:33:23,840
Speaker 1: someone say to me literally like you're so dramatic, you

1622
01:33:23,920 --> 01:33:25,720
Speaker 1: make up everything you know.

1623
01:33:25,800 --> 01:33:28,800
Speaker 3: And that was so hurtful, the worst I felt the worst.

1624
01:33:29,160 --> 01:33:32,439
Speaker 3: Calm down, it's.

1625
01:33:32,280 --> 01:33:37,559
Speaker 2: Like good answers, all right. Question number three, how would

1626
01:33:37,600 --> 01:33:41,439
Speaker 2: you both define your individually your current purpose in life.

1627
01:33:41,880 --> 01:33:45,760
Speaker 1: I fully feel that I am exactly where I meant

1628
01:33:45,800 --> 01:33:49,559
Speaker 1: to be. I am meant to share my story and

1629
01:33:49,560 --> 01:33:52,920
Speaker 1: in this season of my life, I want to be

1630
01:33:54,320 --> 01:33:57,120
Speaker 1: loved the way I love people. I want to give

1631
01:33:57,360 --> 01:34:00,400
Speaker 1: the way people have so generously given to me, and

1632
01:34:00,439 --> 01:34:04,639
Speaker 1: I want to continue to work on become a becoming

1633
01:34:04,680 --> 01:34:06,920
Speaker 1: a better and a happier person every day.

1634
01:34:07,479 --> 01:34:10,479
Speaker 3: It's a beautiful purpose I've received, so now I want

1635
01:34:10,520 --> 01:34:11,839
Speaker 3: to give awful.

1636
01:34:11,920 --> 01:34:14,759
Speaker 2: Wow, this is this is really beautiful answer question of before,

1637
01:34:15,439 --> 01:34:18,160
Speaker 2: what's something you used to value that you don't value

1638
01:34:18,160 --> 01:34:19,040
Speaker 2: that much anymore?

1639
01:34:19,439 --> 01:34:25,479
Speaker 1: Oh, people's opinions? I agree, it's so exhausting. I would

1640
01:34:25,520 --> 01:34:28,760
Speaker 1: say it is nice to hear great things. But I

1641
01:34:29,760 --> 01:34:36,120
Speaker 1: accept compliments in a manner where I can appreciate them.

1642
01:34:36,320 --> 01:34:40,559
Speaker 1: But I have to learn how to just know that.

1643
01:34:42,120 --> 01:34:44,040
Speaker 1: I got to keep a straight head. I got to

1644
01:34:44,080 --> 01:34:47,479
Speaker 1: like understand that everything is a gift and not to

1645
01:34:47,560 --> 01:34:48,760
Speaker 1: let things get to my head.

1646
01:34:49,320 --> 01:34:55,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I always say, if you accept all the

1647
01:34:55,200 --> 01:35:00,799
Speaker 3: compliments internally, then you'll have to accept all the negative.

1648
01:35:01,479 --> 01:35:06,640
Speaker 3: So just be careful, just like be selective with what

1649
01:35:06,760 --> 01:35:07,839
Speaker 3: you let Yeah.

1650
01:35:08,120 --> 01:35:10,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, there's a beautiful quote. I can't remember who

1651
01:35:10,800 --> 01:35:14,519
Speaker 2: said it, but it says, don't let compliments get to

1652
01:35:14,560 --> 01:35:16,599
Speaker 2: your head and criticism get to your heart. Yeah.

1653
01:35:16,640 --> 01:35:17,000
Speaker 1: I love that.

1654
01:35:17,080 --> 01:35:21,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that. That was very poetic with what it's.

1655
01:35:21,040 --> 01:35:25,840
Speaker 2: Been said for just repeatia, no, no, but I think

1656
01:35:25,840 --> 01:35:30,000
Speaker 2: it's such a beautiful and Yeah, and I think that's

1657
01:35:30,040 --> 01:35:34,720
Speaker 2: also when we're mindful of giving compliments to others. I

1658
01:35:34,760 --> 01:35:38,200
Speaker 2: think something that I've learned is that I enjoy and

1659
01:35:38,240 --> 01:35:41,720
Speaker 2: we've talked about this today. I really enjoy the art

1660
01:35:41,960 --> 01:35:44,400
Speaker 2: of learning to see someone's essence. It's something that I

1661
01:35:44,439 --> 01:35:48,240
Speaker 2: try and live by because and then when you want

1662
01:35:48,280 --> 01:35:50,040
Speaker 2: to compliment someone, it's like, how do you give a

1663
01:35:50,080 --> 01:35:52,680
Speaker 2: compliment that is an empty flattery. L that isn't just

1664
01:35:53,120 --> 01:35:56,120
Speaker 2: surface level. And I think when we get compliments like that,

1665
01:35:56,720 --> 01:35:58,200
Speaker 2: they don't go to our head, they do go to

1666
01:35:58,280 --> 01:36:01,639
Speaker 2: our heart. Yeah, you know, it's different. So I hope

1667
01:36:01,640 --> 01:36:04,200
Speaker 2: that we can also learn to compliment each other in more,

1668
01:36:04,960 --> 01:36:08,200
Speaker 2: you know, beautiful and genuine ways. Fifth and final question,

1669
01:36:08,280 --> 01:36:11,800
Speaker 2: Question number five is if you could create one law

1670
01:36:12,120 --> 01:36:14,720
Speaker 2: that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it.

1671
01:36:14,680 --> 01:36:17,440
Speaker 3: Be practicing forgiveness?

1672
01:36:17,479 --> 01:36:17,959
Speaker 2: Wow?

1673
01:36:18,640 --> 01:36:22,679
Speaker 1: I probably would would say something super simple and cheesy,

1674
01:36:22,720 --> 01:36:25,559
Speaker 1: but treat others the way you want to be treated.

1675
01:36:26,400 --> 01:36:28,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then we throw in the forgiveness.

1676
01:36:29,040 --> 01:36:31,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, honestly that's the biggest thing.

1677
01:36:31,520 --> 01:36:35,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, forgiveness. Yeah, yeah, I stayed with campaign.

1678
01:36:35,680 --> 01:36:38,240
Speaker 2: Mom forgiveness campaign.

1679
01:36:38,320 --> 01:36:41,360
Speaker 3: That's right. Wait, can I ask you a question? Yeah, okay,

1680
01:36:41,680 --> 01:36:44,680
Speaker 3: when is the last time you did something for the

1681
01:36:44,720 --> 01:36:45,320
Speaker 3: first time?

1682
01:36:45,680 --> 01:36:50,720
Speaker 2: Oh? Wow, okay, when was the last time I've been

1683
01:36:50,800 --> 01:36:54,760
Speaker 2: practicing this time? The most interesting answer that came to

1684
01:36:54,760 --> 01:36:56,439
Speaker 2: mind straight away, even though it was a couple of

1685
01:36:56,439 --> 01:37:01,240
Speaker 2: months ago. Now, I went trekking with gorillas in Rwanda.

1686
01:37:02,120 --> 01:37:04,679
Speaker 3: Wow, and it was it was amazing.

1687
01:37:04,720 --> 01:37:06,720
Speaker 2: It was. Yeah, it was a few months ago and

1688
01:37:06,720 --> 01:37:11,360
Speaker 2: it was the most incredible experience.

1689
01:37:10,880 --> 01:37:12,479
Speaker 1: Of that sound life wild.

1690
01:37:12,680 --> 01:37:16,320
Speaker 2: Yeah. So they're mountain gorilla and they're not you don't

1691
01:37:16,320 --> 01:37:18,200
Speaker 2: they don't have any technology on them or you know,

1692
01:37:18,200 --> 01:37:20,160
Speaker 2: they're not treated a certain way. They're not in a

1693
01:37:20,240 --> 01:37:23,160
Speaker 2: zoo or they're not trapped. You're in their home and

1694
01:37:23,360 --> 01:37:24,960
Speaker 2: you have to set out early in the morning to

1695
01:37:24,960 --> 01:37:27,160
Speaker 2: go and look for them. And the people that are

1696
01:37:27,240 --> 01:37:29,479
Speaker 2: doing these tours they know where they usually are, so

1697
01:37:29,520 --> 01:37:32,479
Speaker 2: they take you in that direction. Oh my, and then

1698
01:37:32,479 --> 01:37:34,960
Speaker 2: you finally discover like this family of gorillas. And I

1699
01:37:35,000 --> 01:37:37,360
Speaker 2: thought i'd see one or two. I was very I

1700
01:37:37,400 --> 01:37:39,400
Speaker 2: wasn't skeptical, but I was kind of like, who knows,

1701
01:37:39,479 --> 01:37:44,760
Speaker 2: you know, we saw eighteen gorillas, like a family, So no,

1702
01:37:45,360 --> 01:37:51,960
Speaker 2: you know, I wish they cuddle each other. Yeah, but

1703
01:37:52,040 --> 01:37:54,559
Speaker 2: they don't. They the guides tell us that the only

1704
01:37:54,600 --> 01:37:56,920
Speaker 2: thing you have to do is maintain your distance. You're

1705
01:37:56,960 --> 01:37:59,280
Speaker 2: not allowed to try and touch them or their kids,

1706
01:37:59,280 --> 01:38:02,160
Speaker 2: because they see that is violent. The gorillas are just

1707
01:38:02,200 --> 01:38:05,720
Speaker 2: so peaceful and they're so calm, and they have this

1708
01:38:05,880 --> 01:38:07,760
Speaker 2: sound that they make. This was my favorite part of

1709
01:38:07,760 --> 01:38:10,200
Speaker 2: the experience. So we were told by our guide that

1710
01:38:10,240 --> 01:38:12,879
Speaker 2: if you make this sound, it basically tells the gorillas.

1711
01:38:12,960 --> 01:38:17,960
Speaker 2: We come in peace, and so this sound is you

1712
01:38:18,000 --> 01:38:20,400
Speaker 2: have to make that sound and the gorillas make it

1713
01:38:20,439 --> 01:38:24,360
Speaker 2: back to you, or they'll do it to you as

1714
01:38:24,400 --> 01:38:26,120
Speaker 2: they come closer, just to let you know, hey, we're

1715
01:38:26,160 --> 01:38:27,479
Speaker 2: not trying to harm you. We're just going to walk

1716
01:38:27,479 --> 01:38:27,960
Speaker 2: past you.

1717
01:38:28,200 --> 01:38:29,000
Speaker 3: I love that.

1718
01:38:29,680 --> 01:38:34,800
Speaker 2: Really special. So that was the most recent memory of it.

1719
01:38:34,880 --> 01:38:41,640
Speaker 3: Was like, this was beautiful.

1720
01:38:41,960 --> 01:38:44,679
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was. It was really it was really truly special.

1721
01:38:44,720 --> 01:38:48,000
Speaker 2: It was you know, it's just being with another creature,

1722
01:38:49,320 --> 01:38:54,840
Speaker 2: that another form of life that is uninterested in you. Yeah,

1723
01:38:55,040 --> 01:38:57,960
Speaker 2: it's it's very humbling in a good way. This form

1724
01:38:58,040 --> 01:39:01,120
Speaker 2: of life doesn't even care that I exist staring at it,

1725
01:39:03,000 --> 01:39:06,799
Speaker 2: and the gorilla is just like, yeah, that's a good question.

1726
01:39:07,680 --> 01:39:10,000
Speaker 2: It's a good question. Well, Selena and Mandy, you have

1727
01:39:10,240 --> 01:39:12,599
Speaker 2: both been so gracious with your time today. You've been

1728
01:39:12,640 --> 01:39:16,440
Speaker 2: so kind and generous with your energy. And this documentary

1729
01:39:17,360 --> 01:39:21,000
Speaker 2: is going to change so many lives, and it is

1730
01:39:21,040 --> 01:39:26,000
Speaker 2: going to shift the culture of how we share our

1731
01:39:26,120 --> 01:39:31,120
Speaker 2: pain in a way that truly positively impacts the lives

1732
01:39:31,120 --> 01:39:34,280
Speaker 2: of people across the world. And so thank you, Birth

1733
01:39:34,960 --> 01:39:38,800
Speaker 2: really appreciate so much. Thank you for sharing your heart

1734
01:39:39,439 --> 01:39:43,840
Speaker 2: for years, for sharing your soul and for taking the

1735
01:39:43,920 --> 01:39:47,800
Speaker 2: time to create something that's truly going to be talked

1736
01:39:47,800 --> 01:39:49,960
Speaker 2: about for years and years to come.

1737
01:39:51,000 --> 01:39:53,960
Speaker 1: Thanks, thank you j You're the best.

1738
01:39:54,360 --> 01:39:56,240
Speaker 2: And thank you for your friendship as well, of course,

1739
01:39:56,520 --> 01:39:59,439
Speaker 2: and thank you for opening up so vulnerably with us

1740
01:39:59,439 --> 01:40:03,679
Speaker 2: today about your experiences about you know, all the gifts

1741
01:40:03,720 --> 01:40:07,120
Speaker 2: and the challenges that come with loving family and each other.

1742
01:40:07,200 --> 01:40:10,439
Speaker 2: And also for leading as part of this movement and

1743
01:40:10,800 --> 01:40:13,880
Speaker 2: everything you're doing with wonder Mind and trying to help

1744
01:40:14,280 --> 01:40:16,519
Speaker 2: people all across the world with mental health and wellness.

1745
01:40:16,560 --> 01:40:18,120
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for your commitment to.

1746
01:40:18,040 --> 01:40:21,280
Speaker 3: That, and thank you, thank you for everything you do. Yes,

1747
01:40:21,760 --> 01:40:22,800
Speaker 3: altogether we can.

1748
01:40:25,040 --> 01:40:28,800
Speaker 2: I love it. Thank you perfect, Thank you love that