Speaker 1: Hey, fam, I'm Jada Pinkett Smith and this is the
Speaker 1: Red Table pop podcast, all your favorite episodes from the
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Speaker 1: on Apple Podcasts. Get ready for the first time. I'm
Speaker 1: going out here. Oscar winner Gwyneth Paltrow talks sex at
Speaker 1: the Red Table. Have you guys seen what the actual
Speaker 1: clitterest looks like? Just that conversation with my mother starting now,
Speaker 1: I got a slow walking because of these heels. Honey.
Speaker 1: Oh there's only two chairs. Oh, I know, but it's temporary.
Speaker 1: It's temporary for it, and we both have one pink
Speaker 1: for breastast cancer awareness and we didn't plan it. So
Speaker 1: great minds, think alike. Facts all right, r T T fam,
Speaker 1: Fair warning, We are having a sex talk at the table,
Speaker 1: okay with gop Guru Gwyneth Paltrow. Gwyneth is on a way,
Speaker 1: but look who is zooming in. I miss you, guys.
Speaker 1: It just breaks my heart that I can't be there.
Speaker 1: I know you're on the road and you are killing
Speaker 1: it being that rock started you are. You're really showing
Speaker 1: that black girls can what rock. So that's awesome, thank you,
Speaker 1: But we wanted to get your generational perspective on sex.
Speaker 1: You know, Gwyneth is coming. I feel like the sex
Speaker 1: question for this generation is way deeper because it's not
Speaker 1: just about the sex, it's about like who you are? Right?
Speaker 1: Do you feel like your generation is really experimental? It's
Speaker 1: mostly extremes I've seen. I've seen it go from fear
Speaker 1: of just intimacy and having that anxiety and being protective
Speaker 1: of one's emotional state. So I I see that a lot.
Speaker 1: And I also just see complete and utter recklessness and
Speaker 1: just have sex with everyone that you see. Right, Where
Speaker 1: do you think you learned most about sex? Did you
Speaker 1: learn it on the internet from your friends? Did you
Speaker 1: learn it from me? So I would read like those
Speaker 1: little like fiction. I would always go into the library
Speaker 1: and you would always tell me, oh, don't read that book,
Speaker 1: like you're too young to read that, and then would
Speaker 1: be trying to reading and Rice. But I would sneak
Speaker 1: and read these books. And in these books there are
Speaker 1: sex scenes. I would just be readings that to YouTube.
Speaker 1: She's always been supremely curious, so you would think I
Speaker 1: would be getting around a little bit more Jesus. So
Speaker 1: for the very first time. She's an Oscar winner, a
Speaker 1: style icon, mom, wife, boss lady, and now what sex goddess.
Speaker 1: Gwyneth Paltrow was in the house for new project Sex,
Speaker 1: Love and Goop is taken sex to a whole, whole
Speaker 1: new level scale of one to five. How pleasurable it's
Speaker 1: five jack pot. It's one thing to be emotionally vulnerable
Speaker 1: on camera, but to be sexually vulnerable. We've never really
Speaker 1: seen this before. We weren't close to getting a divorce.
Speaker 1: His parents are wondering why he doesn't have babies, and
Speaker 1: am I gonna have an orgasm before I have a baby? Okay,
Speaker 1: let's bring out a couple of little pleasure items. These
Speaker 1: are my no matter what it looked like on camera,
Speaker 1: if you haven't felt that before, for having sex, because
Speaker 1: the show about sex, we're gonna talk about. Come on
Speaker 1: out here, ask a winner. Come on, I'm so god,
Speaker 1: are you kidding me? Nice to meet you, Thank you,
Speaker 1: great to be here. Hi. Hi, She's the latest rock star.
Speaker 1: She's amazing, exciting. One of the reasons why I felt
Speaker 1: like your Netflix project is so powerful is because for
Speaker 1: the first time, Gammy and I were on the phone
Speaker 1: and we were having a very in depth conversation about sex,
Speaker 1: like it was nothing. And I got off the phone
Speaker 1: and I was like, dude, I just had that conversation
Speaker 1: mother totally. I was like, that's healing right then. That
Speaker 1: was probably the first time we ever had a conversation
Speaker 1: about sex in that way, in that kind of free flow,
Speaker 1: and I'm not is talking about just basic surface stuff
Speaker 1: like we went kind of like how you and I
Speaker 1: have done yeah, because it's kind of hard to talk
Speaker 1: about sex if you weren't talking about about sex, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. And it was just so natural.
Speaker 1: Show helped you have that conversation because we have never
Speaker 1: had a reason to go that in depth. But let
Speaker 1: me ask you, we'll talk to you about sex. You know.
Speaker 1: I'm old. So we didn't have this kind of openness
Speaker 1: at all in the culture. I don't know, it just
Speaker 1: was very sort of like we don't talk about because
Speaker 1: you don't. There wasn't a lot of talk about it,
Speaker 1: and so you learned. And it was pre internet, right,
Speaker 1: so it was like we were really siloed in a
Speaker 1: lot of ways. And I don't think we went naturally
Speaker 1: to our mother's to talk about it. It's still weird
Speaker 1: to like, I adore my mother, but I don't know, like,
Speaker 1: do you guys talk about that gonna tell you what's
Speaker 1: so funny? Gwyneth, My mother's conversation to me was don't
Speaker 1: get pregnant. I don't even think my mom's also told
Speaker 1: you that it wasn't gonna be enjoyable, It is not
Speaker 1: going to be fun I think that that myth is um,
Speaker 1: that's not okay for some people. I mean, everyone's body
Speaker 1: is different, you know, but I don't think that you
Speaker 1: should tell someone it's gonna be hurtful, right, it might not.
Speaker 1: That's a very patriarchal thing to um to propagate in
Speaker 1: the minds of young women. Yeah, I mean I have
Speaker 1: to say my first you know, I wouldn't say I
Speaker 1: was like who, but I was like something that I
Speaker 1: can work with, you know how patriarchal it was, Willow.
Speaker 1: It was just my experience. I just I just hear
Speaker 1: that so much. As a woman, you just get told
Speaker 1: that all the time. And it's interesting too, Like I
Speaker 1: remember when my kids were really little, having urged to
Speaker 1: want to say to them like, oh no, did that hurt?
Speaker 1: And you have to catch yourself like, let's not implant
Speaker 1: any ideas around anything, right. But it's hard as a
Speaker 1: mother because to your point up, your own experience needs
Speaker 1: you to define things how you see them. And then
Speaker 1: you say, oh, no, that must have been awful, and
Speaker 1: it's like, well, maybe just ask right, because maybe it
Speaker 1: wasn't that bad. Yeah. I feel like a lot of
Speaker 1: people don't know their bodies enough, and they surely don't
Speaker 1: know the bodies of people that they're having sex with.
Speaker 1: So sometimes things can be a little uncomfortable if you're
Speaker 1: not really aware of how somebody's body is, how it functions,
Speaker 1: how how to get pleasure, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: You're so correct. That's one was left out in my
Speaker 1: conversations with my mother will I never heard the word
Speaker 1: pleasure come out of her mouth. I never heard none
Speaker 1: of that. Yeah. I want to say, once humans can
Speaker 1: fix the way that we perceive sex and just anything
Speaker 1: that has to do with relating to one another, the
Speaker 1: world's going to become a better place. Yeah. I'm so sorry, guys,
Speaker 1: I gotta dip. Okay, bag, you have a great show,
Speaker 1: go kill it. Thank you. How old is she? She's
Speaker 1: always She's so wise and smart. She's like a Buddha,
Speaker 1: like wisdom like pouring out of this child. She's old,
Speaker 1: she's always been that way. So Gwyn, it's like with
Speaker 1: group and everything. I know it's wellness and that's what
Speaker 1: I thought that, But I mean, now you're like this
Speaker 1: kind of sex goddess. Like what made sex for you
Speaker 1: such an important subject? I really do believe that you
Speaker 1: can't really talk about women's wellness without talking about her
Speaker 1: sexual wellness, and that that's a really important pillar in
Speaker 1: overall wellness because so many of us throughout our lives
Speaker 1: have experienced some level of disconnection from ourselves because of
Speaker 1: trauma or you know, shaming, or from partners. And if
Speaker 1: you have a woman who's disconnected from herself or she
Speaker 1: feels shame around her sexuality or she's not comfortable in
Speaker 1: her sexuality, it's like she's cut off from her truest self.
Speaker 1: And sex is so interesting because it's this microcosm for
Speaker 1: what's going on holistically in your life. Right, Like, if
Speaker 1: you're really honest with yourself and you've really done work
Speaker 1: on yourself generally, you can be really close to yourself
Speaker 1: in a sexual way. And if there's a block, you
Speaker 1: can say, oh there's a block here, or this doesn't
Speaker 1: feel right to me, and I just felt like it
Speaker 1: was so fascinating that it's still taboo, you know that
Speaker 1: we still even me, like, even though I'm helping facilitate
Speaker 1: all of these conversations, I'm still shy to talk about
Speaker 1: my sexual stuff, you know. So it's like, how can
Speaker 1: we start to create a conversation where we can just
Speaker 1: eliminate shame from women's lives, And there's no better place
Speaker 1: to do that than around sex. I think we can't
Speaker 1: underestimate how much pain is caused between two people when
Speaker 1: they feel that they don't have the language to tell
Speaker 1: each other what's wrong, what they like, what they don't like.
Speaker 1: Couples unfortunately, fail all the time because the conversation sounds
Speaker 1: so threatening. I always tell people, oh, Rodney and Rodney
Speaker 1: is my husband, And I say, Rodney and I can
Speaker 1: talk about anything, We can talk about any phasing. But
Speaker 1: but the conversation about sex is difficult. But doesn't mean
Speaker 1: we're not talking, but it's difficult, and I still feel
Speaker 1: very shy about it. I still have shame, I still
Speaker 1: have all of these emotions that make the conversation difficult.
Speaker 1: That has been my struggle my entire life. And I'm
Speaker 1: like getting ready to sixty eight. Yeah, gosh, you look good,
Speaker 1: doesn't true? Yes, definitely. I know you revealed some of
Speaker 1: your own struggles with sex, like you know, communication what
Speaker 1: has healed for you? You know? It was the most
Speaker 1: striking thing for me was to remember how important it
Speaker 1: is for women to speak up for themselves. And we're
Speaker 1: not generally conditioned. I mean like Willow and Apple my daughter.
Speaker 1: I think they are a different generation, but our generations,
Speaker 1: I don't think we're conditioned two really speak up for themselves.
Speaker 1: What happens when you don't speak up for yourself. You're
Speaker 1: also not accountable, you know what I mean. You're not saying, hey,
Speaker 1: this is my half of this, or this is like
Speaker 1: where I feel lacking, or here's my insecurity. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: so important for us to be accountable for our sexual selves.
Speaker 1: And if we're uncomfortable or we're not getting what we want,
Speaker 1: we have to muster the bravery to say could I
Speaker 1: ask you this question? Or like, let's talk about this
Speaker 1: right like, because as soon as you make it unthreatening,
Speaker 1: then it's easier for couples to have a conversation. Right.
Speaker 1: It's not you do something wrong or I don't like
Speaker 1: when you do this. It's just like, hey, I've been
Speaker 1: too shy to have this conversation with you, Like, is
Speaker 1: it okay if we talk about that. That's a great
Speaker 1: way to start the conversation. But you also brought something
Speaker 1: up that I think is supremely, supremely important, and that
Speaker 1: is the idea of accountability, right right, You know that
Speaker 1: that we have to be able to speak up when
Speaker 1: things aren't going well, when things are going well, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. But that level of accountability that
Speaker 1: actually bleed through our entire life. We can be accountable
Speaker 1: for our realities, for the quality of our existence, whether
Speaker 1: it's in the bedroom, whether it's in the workplace, no
Speaker 1: matter where it is. So that is a very very
Speaker 1: powerful point. Otherwise we stay in victim right, like someone's
Speaker 1: doing something to me for me, and then you don't grow.
Speaker 1: I always think like that's the devil's biggest trick is
Speaker 1: to like not orient us around accountability and more around victimhood.
Speaker 1: Because victimhood you're like, this is my get out of
Speaker 1: jail free car. Like I don't need to look at
Speaker 1: my that you can cur go right ahead, Okay, sorry, um,
Speaker 1: it's they hurt me, they did this to me. I
Speaker 1: cannot be over here and be resentful, yeah, be angry,
Speaker 1: and then we don't get anywhere, especially for women. For
Speaker 1: us sometimes that's a very difficult subject to talk about. Accountability. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so we've read that you're having some of the best
Speaker 1: sex these days. Yea, and you're forty nine. Yes, But
Speaker 1: I'm an next so it's like, yeah, maybe a little yeah,
Speaker 1: I get that. Yeah, I am too kind of how
Speaker 1: many only three? We just had our three years? Yeah,
Speaker 1: we just had our fifth. Yeah. Me, on the other hand,
Speaker 1: that's amazing, it's incredible. It's hard, I know. I mean
Speaker 1: the thing that will and not talk about a lot
Speaker 1: is the journey. I mean, we started in this at
Speaker 1: a very young age, you know, twenty two years old.
Speaker 1: That's why the accountability part really hit from me, because
Speaker 1: I think you expect your partner to know, especially when
Speaker 1: it comes to sex. It's like, well, if you love me,
Speaker 1: you should know, you know what I mean, if you
Speaker 1: love me, you should be able to reach your mom,
Speaker 1: you know, And that's a huge that's a huge pipe,
Speaker 1: you know. Is that here though, It's like someone doesn't
Speaker 1: read your mind and we feel crushed, rushed, like we
Speaker 1: feel so disappointed. Why do we Where do we get
Speaker 1: that from? I think because I like that at all,
Speaker 1: I guess, or maybe I've just grown out of it.
Speaker 1: I think it's like, you've got to tell me what
Speaker 1: you what you need, Like I can't read your mind
Speaker 1: because I've grown out of it too. Tell me what
Speaker 1: you need, tell me what you want. And on top
Speaker 1: of it, I know that I have to be accountable
Speaker 1: to do the same, and do you. I really try.
Speaker 1: It's uncomfortable, but it's deeply healthy. And I think around
Speaker 1: sex because it's something that we don't talk about a lot,
Speaker 1: and there's so much fantasy around it. Do you know
Speaker 1: how confused we are because of porn? And yeah, I
Speaker 1: was just talking. Somebody really messed us up in some ways.
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to be there for every whim, every pleasure,
Speaker 1: and that the woman's pleasure doesn't matter, it's not even
Speaker 1: thought about. No, no, no. And then the other layer,
Speaker 1: which I find really disturbing, is that because of the
Speaker 1: imagery that comes out and the consciousness comes out around porn,
Speaker 1: I feel like girls, young girls are getting the message
Speaker 1: that they have to be like that's the number one priority, right.
Speaker 1: It's so awful, and it's like it's doing such a disservice. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: and it's so weird. I don't know, I feel like
Speaker 1: we're living in such a weird time because we're making
Speaker 1: all these incredible advancements and then we're going backwards and
Speaker 1: all these other and that really disturbs me that young
Speaker 1: girls you can see it on Instagram absolutely what is
Speaker 1: this pose? Like why are you? What is that? Right?
Speaker 1: And it's because that's what they think is like the
Speaker 1: metric of success, right, Like someone wants to know I'm
Speaker 1: cursing too much. Okay, I know your daughter is seventeen,
Speaker 1: so speaking of Instagram, like, Kenneth, how do you help
Speaker 1: her navigate all of that? It's so interesting to have
Speaker 1: been raised myself. How we all were where like there
Speaker 1: was an answering machine and like if you went out
Speaker 1: for the night, your friends couldn't find you and no Internet.
Speaker 1: And now it's like this hyper exposure that they are
Speaker 1: dealing with all the time. And I think that they're
Speaker 1: wrestling with how much am I exposing myself? Early on,
Speaker 1: I thought, my god, how am I going to parent
Speaker 1: my way through this? You know? Because also for us,
Speaker 1: like we didn't grow up with it. I think they'll
Speaker 1: have more context, right, like Willow and Apple, if they
Speaker 1: become mothers, they'll be like, oh, well, this is how
Speaker 1: I dealt with it. But now so he went to
Speaker 1: Blockbuster and stood in line to check out a video.
Speaker 1: My concern is that there's this hyper objectification happening, and
Speaker 1: they're the standards that they're being told, like, this is
Speaker 1: the prescription you have to look like this. So all
Speaker 1: I've tried to do is focus on who are the
Speaker 1: human beings that I'm raising? What can I do in
Speaker 1: the house to counteract as much of this as possible?
Speaker 1: How do you raise a girl that feels good about
Speaker 1: who she is? Like? What is the messaging? Like, what
Speaker 1: is the quality of listening with them at the dinner table?
Speaker 1: What is the quality of the interaction or the time together?
Speaker 1: Like what are those things that you can bring to
Speaker 1: your parenting that make them feel like, oh, I'm funny? Like, wow,
Speaker 1: I did have a good idea. How do you do it?
Speaker 1: I spent a lot of time with them talking and watching.
Speaker 1: I read this quote. I think it was attributed to Banksy,
Speaker 1: that artist who said something like you know, I'm going
Speaker 1: to paraphrase badly, but this generation of parents like, well,
Speaker 1: do anything for our kids anything, you know, you see
Speaker 1: with like the college scandal or you know, removing all
Speaker 1: their obstacles, Like we will do anything for our kids
Speaker 1: except let them be who they actually are. And I
Speaker 1: read it and I was like I had chills, and
Speaker 1: I thought, God, there are aspects of me that think, well,
Speaker 1: you should do it this way because like that worked
Speaker 1: for me, or let's avoid this, and so I just
Speaker 1: tried to be really conscious of letting them emerge as
Speaker 1: who they are and being loving and supporting. And I
Speaker 1: get up all the time, you know, like I say
Speaker 1: the wrong thing, and especially right now because she's seventeen,
Speaker 1: she's like everything says, oh my god, it's a change
Speaker 1: in nineteen okay, okay, o my god. Um. But now
Speaker 1: that they're young adults, basically it's like how can you
Speaker 1: reinforce valuing each other? So I don't know, it's kind
Speaker 1: of a big experiment, Like I'll see right, like it
Speaker 1: is an experiment. Yeah, it's always so delicate talking about
Speaker 1: how we talk to our kids about sex. But oh
Speaker 1: my god, they thank god they at their elementary school.
Speaker 1: Elementary school, by the way, in sixth grade had the
Speaker 1: craziest sex said, really, it was incredible, full on everything,
Speaker 1: Like they learned everything. I will never forget apples. When
Speaker 1: she came home and she told them every breath. And
Speaker 1: when I say everything, I mean everything. Had she not
Speaker 1: asked you in nothing? Because nothing? No? Really and what
Speaker 1: did this do? And like it's like I love that? Yeah?
Speaker 1: So were good for you? I mean that. Yeah. So
Speaker 1: they kind of broach the subject since then. I don't
Speaker 1: think that kids want to talk to their parents about
Speaker 1: sex that much. I don't know do they. I guess
Speaker 1: I got weird. I make it known like I'm there
Speaker 1: if she wants to talk. Otherwise I just sort of
Speaker 1: leave it. Wow, you got off. You're lucky. What about
Speaker 1: your son's I know it's different for you with with
Speaker 1: with Jayden? How do you talk to your son about sex?
Speaker 1: Or do you? He also had the same sixth grade talks,
Speaker 1: and I'm so grateful for that. He's like at a
Speaker 1: phase where you know, we're extremely close, and he's also
Speaker 1: like differentiating and he doesn't want me to show a
Speaker 1: bra strap, like let alone have me ask him a
Speaker 1: question about a girl. You know, it's like we are
Speaker 1: off limits, Like don't even you know so I'm just
Speaker 1: you know, but I'm like, I'm here if you ever
Speaker 1: want to talk. Yeah, you know. And I think Dad's
Speaker 1: are really good in that particular area. I think so too.
Speaker 1: My whole thing with my sons was just about respect, consideration.
Speaker 1: That was as a mother, I drilled that to the ground.
Speaker 1: So so important. And it's such a cool opportunity to
Speaker 1: be given to like raise a good man. My son
Speaker 1: is such a sweet, empathetic guy when he leaves the room,
Speaker 1: like if we're sitting at the kitchen table, if he
Speaker 1: leaves the room to go to his room, he kisses
Speaker 1: me goodbye. It's Jaden. He loved mama. Yeah, he's the sweetest.
Speaker 1: She's just so prescire. He's twenty three now, Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: It's so nice to be able to have such healthy
Speaker 1: relationships with sons. So that's not easy when it's not
Speaker 1: a given. So I'm glad you have one, you know,
Speaker 1: I'm glad you have a sweetie alright. Joining the table.
Speaker 1: A sexual wellness coach and certified erotic educator giant for
Speaker 1: more than twenty years, Jayat has immersed herself in the
Speaker 1: study of turn and on and developed a signature erotic
Speaker 1: blueprints an individualized guy to getting your sexual need met. Oftentimes,
Speaker 1: doubles blueprints their opposites. Here's an energetic touch, here's a
Speaker 1: sensual touch, here's a kinky touch. And she's featured in
Speaker 1: Sex Love and Good Hello, Welcome. Describe what you do well.
Speaker 1: The short answer is I help people have amazing hot
Speaker 1: sex lives. Nice couples come to me because usually there's
Speaker 1: a discrepancy in their sex life. One of them wants
Speaker 1: more sex, one of them wants less sex. Somebody wants
Speaker 1: to do something that the other one doesn't, and they're
Speaker 1: trying to get on the same page. When we were
Speaker 1: trying to pull together experts for these various couples, Jaia
Speaker 1: was the first person and I thought of because she's
Speaker 1: been able to create these kind of templates for our
Speaker 1: different sexual types. Yeah, I think it's vital to know
Speaker 1: what your erotic blueprint is. It's like giving somebody the
Speaker 1: guide book, this is what I like. Here all my desires,
Speaker 1: here's what turns me on, and just to put those
Speaker 1: out on the table. And so the erotic blueprints are
Speaker 1: one step towards that. So the five erotic blueprint types
Speaker 1: start with the energetic, and that's somebody who's turned on
Speaker 1: by anticipation, space, tease. They like longing, yearning, nie contact
Speaker 1: from across the room. Oh okay, the energetic, And then
Speaker 1: the next one is the sensual. The sensual. The sensual
Speaker 1: someone who's turned on by lights, candles, the environment. It's
Speaker 1: all the senses being ignited, Like the energetic likes all
Speaker 1: the space, but essential ones, all the closeness and slow dancing.
Speaker 1: And then there's the sexual. So the sexual is turned
Speaker 1: on by what we think of a sex in our culture.
Speaker 1: I think of penetration or orgasms or nudity, those kinds
Speaker 1: of things that turn us on. And then the fourth
Speaker 1: one is kinky, and so kinky is about the taboo.
Speaker 1: If something feels taboo to you, then it turns you on.
Speaker 1: So it's that edge. And there's psychological kinky, and then
Speaker 1: there's what is an example of psychological So psychological kinkies
Speaker 1: like we want to play with power, or we want
Speaker 1: to role play, so we may want to surrender in
Speaker 1: the bedroom. We might want to give up power, give
Speaker 1: over or somebody be in control in the bedroom, or
Speaker 1: we like playing in fantasy and roles. But it feels like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm doing something naughty, you know. And then the the
Speaker 1: other aspect is impact aspect, so it's more of a
Speaker 1: sensation aspect, so people who like spanking or people who
Speaker 1: like ropes that intense sensation. And then finally we have
Speaker 1: the shape shifter, and the shape shifter is someone who's
Speaker 1: turned on by all of it. They want all of it,
Speaker 1: they want more, They want all the things, all the time,
Speaker 1: as long as you can possibly have. They love it
Speaker 1: all and they want more of it, all the variety,
Speaker 1: all the different things, all the flavors, the Morgan sport
Speaker 1: of sext. I'm tired just listening to I want to
Speaker 1: talk to you because I have too many girlfriends have
Speaker 1: said they don't know whether they've had an orgasm or not,
Speaker 1: and I just think it's ridiculously Yeah, I'll send them
Speaker 1: some vibrators. Yeah, how do you not know if you
Speaker 1: had an orgasm? I'm telling you right now, if you
Speaker 1: don't know, you haven't had one, you just haven't had
Speaker 1: I feel yeah, would you agree with that? Jack? Well,
Speaker 1: A lot of people pull me aside to say I
Speaker 1: haven't had an orgasm, And my first question is, what
Speaker 1: is your definition of orgasm? What were you saying the
Speaker 1: other day about what you call like the orgasm that
Speaker 1: everybody agrees is an orgasm. It's called the just like
Speaker 1: the genital sneeze. You know, we don't mistake the sneeze
Speaker 1: like to it's that like right, And so that's just
Speaker 1: one kind of orgasm though, Yeah, there are lots of
Speaker 1: for in sensations, and I think that we got kind
Speaker 1: of trapped and like, if I'm not having that, then
Speaker 1: I haven't had the orgasm. God, But you could be
Speaker 1: having a vaginal orgasm which is much deeper g spot,
Speaker 1: you know, which is the spot is more like a tube,
Speaker 1: and so you can have kind of orgasm that waves.
Speaker 1: It's different nerves that innervate the pelvic floor. You know.
Speaker 1: There's different kinds of clitteral orgasm. So have you guys
Speaker 1: seen what the actual clitterest looks like? Do you have here?
Speaker 1: I have it? I have it here. You can bring
Speaker 1: it and bring it out. So this is a volva puppet.
Speaker 1: Most women don't know what's even under the hood here
Speaker 1: and how amazing their vulvas are, and so we can
Speaker 1: see the whole volva here in er and outer labia.
Speaker 1: But the clitterest can either be more outy as well
Speaker 1: or more a and have the hood. But this is
Speaker 1: the whole clitteral structure. We have just as much erectile
Speaker 1: tis you as a person with a penis, but ours
Speaker 1: just goes three sixty degrees around. So we have this.
Speaker 1: This is the vaginal canal. This wraps around the vaginal canal,
Speaker 1: so it goes all the way around in a circle.
Speaker 1: So yeah, getting more clitter it this is this is
Speaker 1: like that makes sense. Did you know your clitterest was
Speaker 1: the big I didn't. I'm a damn nurse, the same woman,
Speaker 1: but I just thought it was this part. I thought
Speaker 1: it was this, but I didn't know about this, the bulbs,
Speaker 1: the vestibular bulbs and the legs. So this is part
Speaker 1: of the problem. We don't know about our bodies and
Speaker 1: then our partners and our lovers. And when you're talking
Speaker 1: about mind reading that we expect people to read our minds,
Speaker 1: Like how you go read this? That's a lot to read,
Speaker 1: not to just saying but it's not that anybody's wrong
Speaker 1: or not trying to satisfy us. Our partners want to
Speaker 1: satisfy us. They want to is just nobody gave them
Speaker 1: the instruction manual well, I understand that you've brought. You've
Speaker 1: brought some more process. So what we're looking at is
Speaker 1: a whole world of discovery in front of us. We've
Speaker 1: got all of these sensation play items, and sensation play
Speaker 1: can bring us deeper into our bodies. And what sensation
Speaker 1: play is is it's literally just taking like a fork
Speaker 1: or a spashala and playing on the body with them
Speaker 1: to see what turns us on? Does that make my
Speaker 1: body take a big deep breath? So we can turn
Speaker 1: anything in our household into something that can become sexy
Speaker 1: and erotic and playful and fun in the bedroom. And
Speaker 1: you do not need to go to the sex toy store.
Speaker 1: You can literally go to the dollar store and get
Speaker 1: all kinds of things from cat toys to car sham ease,
Speaker 1: makeup rushes, make vibrating tooth brushes. What can you do
Speaker 1: with the kay You could take one of these. This
Speaker 1: glove would be great. You can put it inside the
Speaker 1: glove and then your whole glove and hand become this
Speaker 1: vibrating thing. Don't you use this with dust that you
Speaker 1: can't showing you showing you some makeshift situation. Even this, yes,
Speaker 1: like you can use it energetically where you're just like
Speaker 1: looking the person in the eyes right and your So
Speaker 1: this is our groupified version of the God. This just
Speaker 1: a little bit um, you know, because then you can
Speaker 1: use it for salad to nobody will shut Oh what
Speaker 1: did you do with that? Jadaan somebody tip on a fanny,
Speaker 1: never heard nobody and a little tipparent taps on the fannies.
Speaker 1: This is going to be more thuddy, this is going
Speaker 1: to be more stingy, so different sensations. This is broader,
Speaker 1: so it's not going to hurt as that's where this
Speaker 1: broader a little bit. That's a little bit more staying
Speaker 1: on it, like idea being blindfolded. I don't like the
Speaker 1: idea of being tied up. Yeah I could see that.
Speaker 1: What is it about tied up? Then I'm out of control?
Speaker 1: But that's for someone who likes to relinquish. I would say,
Speaker 1: someone like to relinquish in in lose control. We love
Speaker 1: the rope for sometimes somebody who has a lot of
Speaker 1: shame because all of a sudden, what's happening to them?
Speaker 1: You can't it's not their fault. But doesn't help get
Speaker 1: rid of shame or does it make you feel more
Speaker 1: shameful in the moment. It helps people release shame right
Speaker 1: in that moment. It helps him RELI shame because now
Speaker 1: it's not me, it's not my fault. M hmm. Are
Speaker 1: you watching Ronnie Rodney's in for it? Thank you both.
Speaker 1: What you've done is really revolutionary. I think it's going
Speaker 1: to help so many people, we hope. So I just
Speaker 1: feel really grateful to you both and also willow out
Speaker 1: for having this forum. It's so powerful to watch three
Speaker 1: generations of women who love each other and respect each other,
Speaker 1: learned from each other and ask questions. It's such an
Speaker 1: amazing format that you guys have created, so powerful. I
Speaker 1: feel really lucky that you invited us to come. You
Speaker 1: can't any talking to you. I mean, I'm so glad
Speaker 1: that Goop turned out to be more than just about
Speaker 1: household and I know that you came with the fire.
Speaker 1: You came with the fire, and don't forget to watch sex,
Speaker 1: Love and Goop. Thank you so much, thanks for having us.
Speaker 1: We're leaving you all. I love it is amazing. Take
Speaker 1: that game that's for you. Take that you might want
Speaker 1: this too. This was awesome to join the Red Table
Speaker 1: Talk family and become a part of the conversation. Follow
Speaker 1: us at facebook dot com slash red table Talk. Thanks
Speaker 1: for listening to this episode of Red Table Talk podcast,
Speaker 1: produced by Facebook, Watch, Westbrook Audio, and I Heart Radio.