Speaker 1: The Nicky Glaser Podcast. Here's Nikki. Hello here, I am
Speaker 1: welcome to the Nicki Glaser Podcast. I am podcasting from
Speaker 1: New York City and my friend Sarah Lena's house in Manhattan, Tribecca.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna get too much more detailed, but that's
Speaker 1: where I am. I'm joined here in this room, this
Speaker 1: guest room with me by um, my best friend, my
Speaker 1: former roommates, the woman who wrote this theme song. You
Speaker 1: know where you love her? You've heard her on the
Speaker 1: podcast a billion times. She's wearing socks that have the
Speaker 1: girl with the pearl earring on them. They're very cool.
Speaker 1: Where do you get those? It's on your Marina everyone,
Speaker 1: thank you so much. I got them from a very
Speaker 1: nice couple in Richmond, Virginia that housed me for a
Speaker 1: house concert hosted me. They're really cool. I've seen you
Speaker 1: wear something so bold. I feel like I am. They're
Speaker 1: on them into them a real pearl. Those are so cute.
Speaker 1: And the launching my tor T shirt. What'd you say is? Yeah,
Speaker 1: how's that not fallen off in the wash? It's insane.
Speaker 1: I don't know. There might have been two pearls. At
Speaker 1: one point I was watching a video this weekend, No
Speaker 1: by the ways in Arizona joining us. Hey, No, how's
Speaker 1: it good? Good? Good? Hi? Um. So this weekend we
Speaker 1: had a girls trip and we just all sent each other.
Speaker 1: Noah wasn't able to go, but man, we missed her
Speaker 1: and she'll be on the next one. But it was
Speaker 1: seven of us, Um, Sara, Lena whose house we're at
Speaker 1: right now, Anya, Me, Kirsten, Carlyle, Taylor, Cat and that.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, so many Um, it was so much fun.
Speaker 1: But there was this video of miss Tyler. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: Halloween missed two U of us all what we were
Speaker 1: watching the Casey Anthony show that we all were like
Speaker 1: on our chat talking about, but we were like save
Speaker 1: it for the girl's trips. So we watched that and
Speaker 1: we're all unsure if she did it or not. Even
Speaker 1: though I was positive she did like it, I'm pretty
Speaker 1: sure she still did. But I do think it was
Speaker 1: an accident. We don't think she like actually like killed her.
Speaker 1: Like we think she there was a pool accident. It
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. I mean it does matter, but like not
Speaker 1: for the story. Um and Kirsten noticed that we were
Speaker 1: all like kind of snacking and crunching around the room,
Speaker 1: like we had a bunch of snacks that we got
Speaker 1: delivered and we were just all just captivated watching the show,
Speaker 1: and Kirsten decided to record everyone um eating and crunching.
Speaker 1: And I was watching the footage. This morning, you eat
Speaker 1: so slow. You were eating a bag of skinny pop
Speaker 1: and this time, you know those tiny, little one serving ways.
Speaker 1: I've never seen someone eat one piece at a time,
Speaker 1: very slow, And I'm like, I gotta slow the funk
Speaker 1: down when I eat, Like, are you sure? I thought
Speaker 1: that was Kirsten. No, it was she filmed it, so
Speaker 1: she wasn't in it. I was slowly and I was like, man,
Speaker 1: I gotta move slower. If we all ate slower, we'd
Speaker 1: probably eat less because you would have time to digest um.
Speaker 1: And I sometimes watch you eat your bars and you're
Speaker 1: just like you just have like little bites and then
Speaker 1: you'll set it down and it's not like you're trying
Speaker 1: to restrict or be like I can't have it. I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna have a little bit. You literally just are
Speaker 1: very like a slow consumer. Yeah I am a slow consumer.
Speaker 1: But those chickpee pops that taste like fritos are like healthy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was eating those one at a time because I
Speaker 1: was sucking off the powder, like I wish there were
Speaker 1: more powder and less used to pets. I used to
Speaker 1: eat the shell because I just wanted that. I didn't
Speaker 1: like the peanut inside. This was before I was even
Speaker 1: like a weird diet girl, you know, like this is
Speaker 1: just I was just a weird child that only liked
Speaker 1: the shells. And I would choke violently in the stands
Speaker 1: where people would be alarmed because I was supposed to
Speaker 1: eat them and they're so dirty. It was so salty,
Speaker 1: and I like the crunch, and then peanuts would be like,
Speaker 1: get those out of here. This girl's weekend trip was amazing.
Speaker 1: Highlights include psychic vegan restaurant times. So oh yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: so we're supposed to have a psych kick come. Anya
Speaker 1: like found the psychic she was supposed to come. She
Speaker 1: got the date wrong. We were like, not a very
Speaker 1: good psychic. She didn't understand what day. She was like,
Speaker 1: I thought you met Wednesday and was very clearly Sunday.
Speaker 1: And we're like, okay this, Um, we don't trust her
Speaker 1: to with our futures if she can't handle her own present. Um,
Speaker 1: So we didn't get a psychic but then we were
Speaker 1: at I really recommend doing this with a group of people.
Speaker 1: So I don't even know how this came about. We
Speaker 1: were at a dinner the idea for it, and Anya
Speaker 1: tore up the menu that was like little paper menus
Speaker 1: that you know, disposable, tore up seven pieces. We each
Speaker 1: got a strip, and then we wrote down something we
Speaker 1: wanted clarity on in our lives, and we want a
Speaker 1: direction with It could be a word, it could be
Speaker 1: a sentence like what should I do about something, or
Speaker 1: like I just need more, you know, I just want guidance.
Speaker 1: And then we crumpled them up and fold them up
Speaker 1: and put them in a plate, and then we each
Speaker 1: picked one and then we like held it in our
Speaker 1: hands and like switched it around and kind of just
Speaker 1: closed our eyes and whatever vision you got, you said, like,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I'm just sensing the word march, like
Speaker 1: I'm sensing a tunnel, I'm seeing a volcano, like whatever
Speaker 1: images popped into your head in that moment, and then
Speaker 1: you open it up and you see like how we
Speaker 1: could interpret what that vision you get from the energy
Speaker 1: of the paper, and then we'd get like life direction.
Speaker 1: At first, we thought this is a ridiculous idea just
Speaker 1: to make us laugh, and then we started getting freaked
Speaker 1: out by how accurate it was. Like you wouldn't know
Speaker 1: if the question was where will I move? Or you know,
Speaker 1: who should I date? Or should I get a bird?
Speaker 1: And all of the answers that we were coming up
Speaker 1: with were identical. Like I just also, you had to
Speaker 1: pick a piece of paper that spoke to you or
Speaker 1: that you felt a pull towards, and I was holding
Speaker 1: one and I had no direction at all. In my head.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm not going to come up with anything,
Speaker 1: and then out of nowhere, I was like, March and
Speaker 1: September are coming to me. And then I opened it
Speaker 1: up and I was like, where should I move and when?
Speaker 1: And it was like when should I move? That's right,
Speaker 1: so you're going to move to March and septems know you.
Speaker 1: But I did realize though, that this is this is
Speaker 1: exactly what happens with psychics and terro and stuff. It's
Speaker 1: like it's I don't really believe this is actually guiding you,
Speaker 1: but it's like it tells you. It tells you what
Speaker 1: you want to, Like, we really want to be guided
Speaker 1: in the direction that you want to go. But sometimes
Speaker 1: it's hard to admit to yourself what you want, and
Speaker 1: so interpreting a mysterious clue really helps you in a
Speaker 1: way that doesn't feel so self serving tell you what
Speaker 1: you really want. So like if someone was if I
Speaker 1: was to say, what am I supposed to do? I
Speaker 1: need to make a change? What should I do? Is
Speaker 1: that like my question? And then someone says March. I
Speaker 1: can go, oh, I'm going to move in March, or
Speaker 1: it could be I'm going to start a women's march,
Speaker 1: or it's going to be like I need to watch
Speaker 1: March of the Penguins or uh, you know, you can
Speaker 1: really make anything out of Because I was like, shouldn't
Speaker 1: get a bird? And Sara Lena for mine had seen
Speaker 1: a tunnel and sam of vagina and eyes and a vagina,
Speaker 1: and so we were like, oh, you should get a
Speaker 1: sand bird. The sand is that is in the forest,
Speaker 1: in the rainforest. You need a parrot. I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: I was already planning on getting a parent. This wasn't
Speaker 1: about like do I get a quail or a parent.
Speaker 1: I'm going to get a parent. We were like tropical birds, Like,
Speaker 1: but you can put sand anywhere. You can just be
Speaker 1: like a sandbox is at a school. You should have
Speaker 1: a child, you know, like it really is kind of
Speaker 1: telling you what you want. But it was so fun,
Speaker 1: just got the conversation like kind of going in a
Speaker 1: like you know, sometimes it's hard for people to like
Speaker 1: open up about things. I feel like girls trips for
Speaker 1: me are always ways for us all to kind of
Speaker 1: talk about what's on our mind and might what might
Speaker 1: be like really maybe shameful or embarrassing about our situation,
Speaker 1: or how clueless we all feel, or how like just
Speaker 1: stuck we all feel. And then one of us reveals
Speaker 1: it and then the others are all like I am
Speaker 1: either there right now and it seems like I have
Speaker 1: it all together or I have been there. And it
Speaker 1: was just so helpful and um we also Sar Lena
Speaker 1: did the coolest surprise for us. We got into town.
Speaker 1: It was just a quick trip. We got a quick trip.
Speaker 1: We went to a gas station. Um, and that was
Speaker 1: the highlight. We got big gulps. It's a different branding,
Speaker 1: but um, we got into town, went to lunch then
Speaker 1: we So the highlight for me was Sara Lena had
Speaker 1: a surprise for us and she was like, it's not
Speaker 1: a big deal. Don't seriously, don't don't get excited about it.
Speaker 1: First of all, she got us. She got us, so
Speaker 1: we were gonna stay at her new house that we're
Speaker 1: at right now, right but and she has multiple floors
Speaker 1: and we could have just taken over one of the
Speaker 1: floors or whatever. But she was like, I just feel like,
Speaker 1: you know, my husband's gonna be there, He's gonna be
Speaker 1: on a different floor and we could totally avoid him.
Speaker 1: They have like elevators here. She was like, but I
Speaker 1: kind of want to be away. So she, out of
Speaker 1: the kindness of her wallet, got us Hotel Stay the
Speaker 1: Sweet these two suites that had like adjoining rooms, practically
Speaker 1: at the nicest hotel any of us have ever stayed at.
Speaker 1: My mom would have had a field day on this,
Speaker 1: like look at this. You might have seen some of
Speaker 1: the footage on my Instagram story of us playing with
Speaker 1: the curtains that you know, you press a button and
Speaker 1: they open um shooting like Taylor Swift videos. But and
Speaker 1: everything was very French and like feminine, and you just
Speaker 1: felt like you were in Paris in nineteen yes five,
Speaker 1: so nice. It was like the way Graceland felt when
Speaker 1: we visited graceland and everything is preserved in time. It's
Speaker 1: almost like fifties stuff but new and so this place
Speaker 1: is just gorgeous. Um. Shout out to the fol fouquet
Speaker 1: if you want to look at how pricing of the
Speaker 1: rooms are. Guys, we go look at folk at fo
Speaker 1: u q e t q E twos. I'll never fouquet
Speaker 1: it and so um. But we went to what we
Speaker 1: were like, went out for the day. We got foot
Speaker 1: massages from Anya as a Christmas gift. It was so nice. Spot. Yes,
Speaker 1: four seasons foot spot. Oh, I thought I thought it
Speaker 1: was the one by the comedy seller. That's what it's called,
Speaker 1: is four Seasons, I think, or like, yeah, something like that.
Speaker 1: If you ever go visiting New York. It's on eighth
Speaker 1: Street and sixth Avenue. Um, it's called four Seasons. An
Speaker 1: hour long foot massage from one of the strongest men
Speaker 1: and women or women. There's three. Yeah. We had you
Speaker 1: just sit in a room and you lay back in
Speaker 1: a chair and you get your feet pummeled and you
Speaker 1: make orgasmic sounds and you cover your eyes just like
Speaker 1: when you calm. I realize I have the same reaction
Speaker 1: to coming that I do that I like get embarrassing
Speaker 1: and I have to cover my eyes. You're also just
Speaker 1: as like focused and directorial. You're like that's good, that's
Speaker 1: actually less no more more like to the point where
Speaker 1: you think you're But I'm very giving with like, oh
Speaker 1: that's so good. Oh god, that's good. And they love
Speaker 1: it and they laugh so hard at my responses. Um
Speaker 1: So then afterwards Celan was like, I have a surprise.
Speaker 1: So then we go. It's just like a cozy I mean,
Speaker 1: it's still she's so good planning, it's amazing. So we
Speaker 1: go back to the hotel. We walk in. First of all,
Speaker 1: one of the bell hops ruined the surprise because he's like,
Speaker 1: are you guys here for the movie? We're like oh,
Speaker 1: And then Sailer was like he ruined it, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: he ruined it twenty seconds before we would have seen
Speaker 1: it was a movie. So we took an elevator downstairs
Speaker 1: to like the basement level and there's a cinema there,
Speaker 1: like where they do screenings. I'm sure this place is
Speaker 1: so nice. It open like four months ago. We are
Speaker 1: probably the first people in this and we watch and
Speaker 1: it has surround sound. Surround sound for this movie that
Speaker 1: like the kind of loungels that are like beds that
Speaker 1: are like fainting couches, and we pushed them all together
Speaker 1: and like Madeline like in an where all these little
Speaker 1: beds in a row and we get to watch Can't
Speaker 1: Hardly Wait, which was a movie that was a seminole
Speaker 1: classic for me and all my friends growing up and
Speaker 1: like informed so much of who we are, and we
Speaker 1: all have such a nostalgia for it. And Anya, who
Speaker 1: like grew up slightly different generation, just missed out on
Speaker 1: it just enough, just the way that I missed out
Speaker 1: on like Heather's or Not another teen movie or Volume
Speaker 1: Wire a movie like yeah, reality bites. You know, it's
Speaker 1: just that key moment. So if you graduated between, if
Speaker 1: you graduated high school between nine and two thousand four,
Speaker 1: you're gonna love Can't Hardly Wait and Um, but then
Speaker 1: I loved watching it with you because you are like
Speaker 1: a cinema phile, cinephilee, a pedophile too. You you you
Speaker 1: are pedophilic for cinnamon. Um, your cinephile, like you love cinema,
Speaker 1: you know, like you know Tarkovsky and like a little
Speaker 1: bit Tarantina. I mean, I don't know, you just know
Speaker 1: like Stephen Spielberg, Michael Bay uh, Michael Bay and you, um,
Speaker 1: but you would joyed it. Oh. I loved it because
Speaker 1: Embry is so cute with those big sad eyes. The
Speaker 1: soundtrack was amazing. Smash Mouth is used three or four
Speaker 1: Jennifer love you. It's boobs or like define gravity. She's
Speaker 1: in her absolute peak. Everyone has yellow teeth, yes, everyone
Speaker 1: has normal colored teeth. Everyone had botox, everyone has like
Speaker 1: you know those she's wearing that classic Um remember the
Speaker 1: shirt that were so popular that like the little spaghetti
Speaker 1: strap but had like a built in bra with it too,
Speaker 1: you know what? Yeah, so everyone had flyaways And He's like,
Speaker 1: people would be dying right now if this was st
Speaker 1: fly aways. It's almost as if your nipple is hanging
Speaker 1: out how much? But she was flyways. I'm like, so
Speaker 1: you mean some of my hairs might be like around
Speaker 1: my who like right now, feel my head? I just
Speaker 1: did a feld about a disgrace. They pasted my head
Speaker 1: down because of fly away. Um. And so it was
Speaker 1: just interesting to see. And then Jennifer left was every
Speaker 1: guy's crush, like god like and even impossible and possibly beautiful,
Speaker 1: like a doll come to life like the Tiniest waste,
Speaker 1: the biggest tiniest boobs. That movie is just so well
Speaker 1: done because the background, like everything going on in the background.
Speaker 1: There's jokes happening in the background. You know, there's constantly
Speaker 1: people that you're seeing on screen that you're like, that's
Speaker 1: a person that's in the movies now, Like it was
Speaker 1: just everyone was in it. Seth Green was so much
Speaker 1: fun to watch with you because your you remember dialogue,
Speaker 1: you probably haven't seen this movie for a few years
Speaker 1: at least, like at least ten. Pen mean, Nikki was
Speaker 1: like like calling out the phrases through the whole film.
Speaker 1: I'm like, how do you know that you have such
Speaker 1: an incredible memory? I have a incredible memory or something.
Speaker 1: I watched literally under time, you know, like it's clueless
Speaker 1: and can't hardly wait for me where my bad man
Speaker 1: was so cute. But at the end it was funny
Speaker 1: because I've talked about it before. I didn't kiss a
Speaker 1: boy until like so late in high goal, you know,
Speaker 1: I was like junior senior year or something like that,
Speaker 1: and um and all my friends with kiss boys, and
Speaker 1: I just didn't know how to do it. I thought
Speaker 1: it was gonna be bad and I studied that movie
Speaker 1: so much, the kiss at the very end where you know,
Speaker 1: spoiler alert, the ethan Embery and the girl kiss and
Speaker 1: she does this thing if you go back and watch it,
Speaker 1: and I still do it to this day when you
Speaker 1: kiss someone, you kiss and then a second and a
Speaker 1: half later, your eyebrows go up, like, oh, that was
Speaker 1: surprised me. Like you kiss and then And it was
Speaker 1: so funny because I called it out, I go kiss
Speaker 1: eyebrows and then everyone laughed because they were like, how
Speaker 1: did you know that was gonna happen. I was like,
Speaker 1: I've studied this extensively, and that is how I kissed
Speaker 1: to this day, and and so then that was so fun.
Speaker 1: And then we went to dinner and she had a
Speaker 1: bat two bags of snacks ready for us in the
Speaker 1: theater as a surprise to like indicate two cases of lacroix.
Speaker 1: It was so fun. There were no drugs, there were
Speaker 1: no drinking. It was just all girl good time. Pajama
Speaker 1: might have micro dost a little bit, but I don't
Speaker 1: even think it affected me much. Um it was it
Speaker 1: was awesome girl time. And then Anya and I were
Speaker 1: fresh from a crazy weekend of shows, which is so much,
Speaker 1: so many busties came out. It was so nice to
Speaker 1: see you all. We were in Waterloo, New York at
Speaker 1: a casino called Del Lago, and then we were in Her, Pennsylvania,
Speaker 1: which was amazing. Oh my god, her, she was incredible.
Speaker 1: And then um, the final night was at the Borgata
Speaker 1: in Atlantic City, and we're going to tell you about
Speaker 1: who I got to hang out with their which you
Speaker 1: might are already seen on my Instagram. But it's quite
Speaker 1: a story that surrounds it. So we'll be back right
Speaker 1: after this. That story. Okay, we're back. So um was
Speaker 1: at the Borgada in Atlantic City on Sunday, wait, Saturday night,
Speaker 1: Saturday night, and there I was doing the music Box Theater,
Speaker 1: which is the smaller of the two venues there at
Speaker 1: the Borgata. Um Jerry Seinfeld was in the other one.
Speaker 1: And I knew about that months before because I remember
Speaker 1: Chris had some friends in Atlantic City and he was like,
Speaker 1: they're deciding between Jerry Seinfeld and you, and they picked you,
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh my god, that's so nice.
Speaker 1: And then um, So I remembered hearing that, but I
Speaker 1: forgot about it because I just kind of put that
Speaker 1: out of my mind. Because I feel like I don't
Speaker 1: want I don't want to know. I just don't want
Speaker 1: to know who's in the next room selling more tickets.
Speaker 1: And like also Jerry Seinfeld, i'd i'd be like, go
Speaker 1: see him instead of me, But people actually came out
Speaker 1: to see me, Like he had tickets available and they
Speaker 1: still chose to came to see me. It was so fun.
Speaker 1: It was such a good show. And throughout the show,
Speaker 1: I even referenced that, like, you guys chose me tonight.
Speaker 1: Fuck Jerry Seinfeld. Like I was just like being joking,
Speaker 1: because obviously not I love Jerry Seinfeld, but I was like,
Speaker 1: fuck Jerry, And I was like, you know, you might
Speaker 1: want to step out in there and like cleanse your
Speaker 1: palette after these like pedophile jokes, just like step into
Speaker 1: his showroom and um just see what he's up to.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, what if you walk in and he's like,
Speaker 1: what's the deal with pedophiles? I mean they're kids? You
Speaker 1: want to have sex with that kid? Like I was
Speaker 1: just doing kind of Jerry, are you doing? I guess
Speaker 1: someone I've heard someone actually do a bit of a
Speaker 1: Tomta Car used to do dirty Jerry, that's right, So
Speaker 1: I guess I was kind of doing that, but and
Speaker 1: then and so I kept us being like, who needs
Speaker 1: you know, making jokes about it, but also like so
Speaker 1: reverential because I love Jerry Seinfeld so much. And then
Speaker 1: we get off stage, I do the meet and greet,
Speaker 1: which is really fun, aside from the guy who Okay,
Speaker 1: during the show, though there was I was doing a
Speaker 1: whole bit about um that I've been doing for years.
Speaker 1: It's just a bit I've been doing forever. If you
Speaker 1: come to see me when you're like I've already seen
Speaker 1: that bit, just know that it just hasn't been in
Speaker 1: a special. I might have done it on the road before,
Speaker 1: but all the stuff I'm doing right now has never
Speaker 1: been in a special. So if you've heard a joke before,
Speaker 1: it's because it's been in my act. Wild There's this
Speaker 1: joke that I've never found to put in a special,
Speaker 1: But it's about how short guys are tend to have
Speaker 1: better personalities than tall guys, and tall guys kind of
Speaker 1: like have the world given to them generally because tall,
Speaker 1: you know, they look like they have more power, so
Speaker 1: everyone like kind of likes them and laughs at everything
Speaker 1: they say, so they think they're funny all this b
Speaker 1: da da da that. So I'm doing I do that
Speaker 1: bit and then I move on to something else. And
Speaker 1: in the middle of a bit, a guy just walks
Speaker 1: to the front of the stage, which does not happen
Speaker 1: ever unless you're at a cop Maybe this happen at
Speaker 1: commic clubs. And he sets a shot glass on the
Speaker 1: stage and it's like offering it to me, you know,
Speaker 1: And I just go, what do he do? What? What is?
Speaker 1: What is what's happening over here? And he's just like
Speaker 1: and I go, what is that? And he goes I
Speaker 1: think whiskey, and I go, oh, sorry. He doesn't know
Speaker 1: the drink, but he does know the chemical compound of
Speaker 1: the pill he put inside of it. He's very sure
Speaker 1: of that. And I was just making I go this
Speaker 1: what what what made you do that? And I'm like,
Speaker 1: I forget the jokes I was making. It was pretty
Speaker 1: funny about it. But um, I was like, thank you
Speaker 1: so much, like never do that again, like kind of
Speaker 1: under my breath, like being thank you. That's really nice actually,
Speaker 1: but you have no self awareness and um, this was
Speaker 1: a bad choice. And um. And then and then I
Speaker 1: go and also it's just I go, I really see
Speaker 1: him when walked away because it's kind of far. The
Speaker 1: room was so fucking big and so full of people.
Speaker 1: I could pick it up. But um, I go, you're tall,
Speaker 1: aren't you. This is such a fucking tall thing to do,
Speaker 1: like a confident, a hot guy thing to do, because
Speaker 1: just to interrupt a show and be like I'm gonna
Speaker 1: give her a shot and she's gonna be so grateful.
Speaker 1: I go, First of all, I don't drink, so thanks
Speaker 1: for your research and I've already said that on stage tonight.
Speaker 1: And secondly, you just interrupted my bit and it wasn't
Speaker 1: like I was you know, I'm not Bert Kreisher, Like
Speaker 1: this wasn't It was just not the vibe and kind
Speaker 1: of trashed him a little bit for it. But it
Speaker 1: makes me think of like when guys like ask women,
Speaker 1: um to like go out with them on like a
Speaker 1: jumbo tron. It's like puts them on the spot. It's
Speaker 1: so uncomfortable for the woman. Wait, we asked them to
Speaker 1: go out like you mean, get engaged to go out
Speaker 1: with you. I like you, just like you know, like
Speaker 1: in like a very public setting. It just so it's
Speaker 1: it it's cringe. And this is the guy I think
Speaker 1: it is. It's so checks out. Do you know, because
Speaker 1: you didn't, did you witness? I think I met this
Speaker 1: person at the march table got groped his wife, trying
Speaker 1: to chastise him in front of me. I realized immediately
Speaker 1: she has the full time job of babysitting her husband.
Speaker 1: He was so annoying. He kept saying he was going
Speaker 1: to carry me. He said, you're not going to carry me.
Speaker 1: He's like, I'm gonna lift you up. I'm gonna lift him, Like,
Speaker 1: you're not going to lift me up? And then he
Speaker 1: like groped up to and I said no. I was like,
Speaker 1: please get your hand. I already shamed him from the stage,
Speaker 1: and then at the meet and greet he asked to
Speaker 1: lift me up, which I never want because even though
Speaker 1: you think I'm light, I have heavy bones and you
Speaker 1: were going to make some kind of I don't want
Speaker 1: to be that close to you. I think, stop howard trip. Guys. Yes,
Speaker 1: guys like that get off that women saying no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no no, that's what they want to get Ray pissed.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, exactly. But he also was harassing this
Speaker 1: other couple. I thought they were together and they were
Speaker 1: trying to take a photo of me. He's like, all right,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna take the picture of you. Guys. Now lift
Speaker 1: her up, lift on you up, lift her up. I'm like,
Speaker 1: do not lift me up? And the guy's like lifting up,
Speaker 1: caring fetish, you know, like he just his poor wife.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna change his name because I remember his ask.
Speaker 1: I will say, and sometimes they just like grab you.
Speaker 1: I mean, this hasn't happened in years. I mean, this
Speaker 1: was more like the wild West of comedy clubs, where
Speaker 1: no one knew who you were. I was an opening
Speaker 1: act that didn't respect me at all, and now there's
Speaker 1: it just rarely happens. But um, it was nice to
Speaker 1: have besties like right behind him so that when he left,
Speaker 1: they were like, are you okay? That's fine because I
Speaker 1: know how to kind of handle it. Now. He just goes,
Speaker 1: can I lift you up? And I go no, and
Speaker 1: he goes really like, first of all, shut I said, no,
Speaker 1: don't give me no one, no, no, I'm six four,
Speaker 1: yes exactly, And I go, I knew you were tall
Speaker 1: as soon as you walked up. I go, I knew
Speaker 1: the guy that brought a shot was fucking tall. And
Speaker 1: then he no offense to any tall people listening. You're
Speaker 1: all kind and I love you. Um. But then he goes.
Speaker 1: Then we take a picture and he kisses might side
Speaker 1: of my face, but I don't know if he's kissing
Speaker 1: me or licking it. I thought he's gonna lick, so
Speaker 1: he I think he's licking my face and I make
Speaker 1: a face like I'm just like, get it over with.
Speaker 1: And always the times when the cameras don't work right,
Speaker 1: so you have to hold it, and I know you're like,
Speaker 1: why don't you tell him get to funk off you?
Speaker 1: I swear to God, you guys, it is more work
Speaker 1: than to just get through with it, like to just
Speaker 1: because then his wife, and I was embarrassed for his wife,
Speaker 1: who was very nice and who could you could tell
Speaker 1: it's like just putting up with her drunk husband who
Speaker 1: kind of kepting like Michael Michael Michael had changed his name,
Speaker 1: but full name Michael Michael. I told him I was like,
Speaker 1: please post that because my face was so funny in it,
Speaker 1: because I was so disgusted, and he was like, how
Speaker 1: this sucks, and I go, no, that's hilarious, Like you
Speaker 1: focus on my face and know that this is how
Speaker 1: most people feel when encountering you. And you're gonna start
Speaker 1: getting older and you're gonna lose your fucking looks, and
Speaker 1: then what are you going to have? The sad part
Speaker 1: is he will never have any self awareness about it.
Speaker 1: Even after he listens to this, I'll probably have a
Speaker 1: weird like, yeah, I was trying to censor myself a yeah,
Speaker 1: half chub for this whole story, I'll be like, yes, success, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's the problem with sociopaths, like they do like it.
Speaker 1: And he did. Because if I were him and I
Speaker 1: brought a shot on stage thinking it would be a
Speaker 1: funny thing because I've been that person before where I
Speaker 1: just don't read the room right and then you get
Speaker 1: a little bit shamed. I didn't shame him mercilessly because
Speaker 1: I'm grateful he just made it. You know, he made
Speaker 1: an error and thinking that's the right time he's maybe
Speaker 1: with just freshly from a Burt Chriser show, where that's
Speaker 1: okay and and actually like invited, So I wasn't. I
Speaker 1: trusted him a little bit, but I was also like,
Speaker 1: thank you for coming, no big deal, thank you for
Speaker 1: the shot. That was nice to think of, you know.
Speaker 1: But then if that happened to me. I would skip
Speaker 1: the meet and greet because I would be so embarrassed
Speaker 1: that she knows I'm that guy. But I tell you apologize.
Speaker 1: Ten out of ten times, when someone is an embarrassing person,
Speaker 1: a guy in the crowd and does something that I
Speaker 1: the whole crowd feels crunch for them. They will come
Speaker 1: to the meet and greet and they'll be like, I
Speaker 1: was the guy that did that, and I go, I
Speaker 1: know you are because I studied your face to use
Speaker 1: it for a sketch artist when you eventually ranked me. Someday,
Speaker 1: I would like, I studied your face so I can
Speaker 1: give it to a police sketch artist. Um, but it's yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just a certain type of person. But it's a
Speaker 1: rare person. Anyway, after the show, I get done without
Speaker 1: Meat and Great. I washed my hands, um, I cleansed
Speaker 1: my balance, and I'm getting ready to sit down and
Speaker 1: eat my dinner. That was delicious. And I was so
Speaker 1: excited because meat I had been done with three shows,
Speaker 1: three meet and Greats, which is really six shows, and
Speaker 1: just to be a night. I love the meet and greets. No,
Speaker 1: this is over like in three days. So Thursday, Friday Saturday.
Speaker 1: It was just like and we drove in between each show,
Speaker 1: like it was a lot of work for me, Anya
Speaker 1: and Matt Um you know, my tour manager, Matt Pond,
Speaker 1: and so we were all just kind of like And
Speaker 1: Bobby jay Cox was also who you've heard on the podcast.
Speaker 1: He was also there. So we're all backstage. Oh and
Speaker 1: before the show, Matt said something to me right about Jerry. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he was like, would you, like, Nikki, would you have
Speaker 1: any interested in meeting Jerry today because he's just down
Speaker 1: the way if you want, we can set that up. Yeah.
Speaker 1: He was like, do you want me to inquire about it?
Speaker 1: And I was like, god, no, no, like he he
Speaker 1: doesn't need to meet me, Like I don't want to
Speaker 1: bother him, Like, of course I would love to meet
Speaker 1: Jerry Seinfeld, but like I have met Jerry before. I
Speaker 1: was on inside Amy Schumer and we did a sketch
Speaker 1: called Eighties Ladies and at the end of it Jerry
Speaker 1: comes in and we like I get to latch arms
Speaker 1: with him, watch on the street. I met him briefly
Speaker 1: that day. It was very cool outside. It was a
Speaker 1: quick shoot. It was cool to be on camera with him,
Speaker 1: but it wasn't. We didn't have an interaction. I knew
Speaker 1: his wife from hanging out at Amy's house. His wife,
Speaker 1: Jess and Amy are friends, and I really loved Jess
Speaker 1: and we were Instagram friends for a while and we
Speaker 1: haven't talked to years, but I liked her. But I
Speaker 1: just I don't know. I got the sense about Jerry
Speaker 1: from watching Comedians and Cars, Like, first of all, I
Speaker 1: think I was like a little bit better, like I
Speaker 1: wanted to be on that. Not that I should have
Speaker 1: been on the show, but I wish it was still
Speaker 1: around so that when I was famous enough, I could
Speaker 1: have been on it. So I was always kind of like,
Speaker 1: I'm almost like there were a couple of comics on
Speaker 1: it that I was like, Oh, I could be on
Speaker 1: the show, you know. And I think I was just
Speaker 1: like I want to be on the show. And and
Speaker 1: from watching Comedian the documentary and just being a huge
Speaker 1: Starry Centl fan, I thought I knew what he was like,
Speaker 1: and like, he's very serious about comedy. He's gonna want
Speaker 1: to talk bits I might not have any, and he's
Speaker 1: not going to be a fan of my comedy like
Speaker 1: he does clean comedy. He's very meticulous about word um
Speaker 1: choice and just he hasn't he has the style that
Speaker 1: I wish I could have, and that I just I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't have the discipline or whatever. And
Speaker 1: I just revere him. He's a you know, an advocate
Speaker 1: of transcendental meditation. He's just smart and cool and he's
Speaker 1: the kind of comic I wish I could be in
Speaker 1: terms of work ethic and stuff and and clean and
Speaker 1: accessible and all those things. And then on backstage about
Speaker 1: to sit down, like about to take a bite of
Speaker 1: my cauliflower, and I'm like ah, and then Matt comes
Speaker 1: back and it's like, uh, Nikki, Jerry would like to
Speaker 1: see you. And I was just like okay. I didn't
Speaker 1: even freak out. I was like, yep, that's happening. And
Speaker 1: I was just I knew exactly what it meant. I
Speaker 1: was like, I have been summoned. Jerry wants to meet me.
Speaker 1: I just I think I might have said, like he
Speaker 1: asked for me, and He's like yes, And so it
Speaker 1: was like go time, and Matt was like I think
Speaker 1: you should go, like you should have one person go
Speaker 1: with you if you want, and I was like absolutely,
Speaker 1: and he starts getting ready. I'm like Annie and I
Speaker 1: are going. She's the perfect wingman for a situation where
Speaker 1: you know, she's not gonna like fan girl out too hard,
Speaker 1: she's not gonna embarrass herself. She like is cool around celebrities. Um.
Speaker 1: And so she comes with me and we get walked
Speaker 1: through like the bowels of the Atlantic City casino to
Speaker 1: the other side of the place where Jerry is just performed,
Speaker 1: and we don't know what to expect, like at all.
Speaker 1: I just think he's being cordial to the other comedians
Speaker 1: performing there. We had no idea, but the way where
Speaker 1: the security guard did say he never does this, and
Speaker 1: he comes to Atlantic City a lot, and he's like,
Speaker 1: he's never done this with like the other comic performing
Speaker 1: and I'm like, he's like and all the times he's
Speaker 1: never done something like Jerry never does this. I don't
Speaker 1: know that Jerry never does this. I was like, all right,
Speaker 1: and so, oh my god, I'm getting bumps again. That night,
Speaker 1: we could not stop getting goosebumps. It was. And we're
Speaker 1: both pretty non like we're not starstruck. People know, like,
Speaker 1: I'm pretty chill, like we've met a lot of people.
Speaker 1: Was nervous to meet Jerry though, because we were both
Speaker 1: like down the hall like click click click our high heels.
Speaker 1: They were just playing that called trivia game on your Instagram.
Speaker 1: So weird because the night before one of my fans, Innocence,
Speaker 1: brought me a fun trivia card game of Seinfeld Trivia
Speaker 1: and I was nailing it, and like I would realize,
Speaker 1: I'm a fucking good Seinfeld fan. Like it is, I
Speaker 1: still retain a lot of that obsessive knowledge from you know,
Speaker 1: middle school, high school, um, and that show I put
Speaker 1: it on all the time. It still holds up. It's
Speaker 1: the best and as you all know. And so then
Speaker 1: we get we approach and I guess it's the last
Speaker 1: dressing room and I kind of know, it says, and
Speaker 1: I just here is she? Here? Is she here? And
Speaker 1: I walk in and he's our are you walking up
Speaker 1: to the front of the door to greet us? And
Speaker 1: he is even before I get him, he embraces me
Speaker 1: and he's like, I think I blacked out, but he
Speaker 1: goes he says something like, I am a huge fan.
Speaker 1: I love you. You are so funny. I have watched
Speaker 1: everything you do. You are so eager, And I was like,
Speaker 1: I thought, I literally said this to him, I go
Speaker 1: are you doing an impression of what I should be
Speaker 1: saying to you. Like I said that to him, I go,
Speaker 1: this is all the sort of stuff I go on,
Speaker 1: are you talking about? I go your Jerry Seinfeld. I
Speaker 1: was like, you don't know what you mean to me?
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for everything, like I love you.
Speaker 1: And I started kind of tearing up because he was
Speaker 1: just saying he was like a true fan of mine.
Speaker 1: Like I thought they were doing a bit. I thought
Speaker 1: it was a put on because all I heard I'm
Speaker 1: behind Nikki as we're entering this tiny little green room
Speaker 1: that they're all in. He's there with his two openers,
Speaker 1: and all I hear is I love you, I love you.
Speaker 1: I can't believe you. I love that this is happening.
Speaker 1: I love that this is happening. And I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is a joke, like they're just being big on purpose,
Speaker 1: And then I realized this is real. They've really truly
Speaker 1: never met like this before and they're both freaking out.
Speaker 1: He was like, what was your first impression? Because I
Speaker 1: had like a cup hot. Yeah, he was like, he
Speaker 1: is not so hot, it's insane. And he's also like
Speaker 1: Chris to me, like he looked like the way my
Speaker 1: boyfriend is going to age, and like I wouldn't have
Speaker 1: thought Jerry Seinfeld would like give this aura of like hotness,
Speaker 1: like I've never like no offense, but he's always been
Speaker 1: cool and definitely like a catch on his show. He's
Speaker 1: always like the guy that was dating, like the cool girl,
Speaker 1: and he's like and he has like a hot wife.
Speaker 1: I mean, he does well for himself. There's you. I
Speaker 1: should have assumed he would be this way in person,
Speaker 1: but he was like fit and had good posture but
Speaker 1: like not too bulky, not too thin, like perfect sixty
Speaker 1: something year old man bod like perfect like hot silver
Speaker 1: fox like hair, right jawline, like he really did. I afterwards,
Speaker 1: I texted Chris, and I think Chris was probably rolling
Speaker 1: his eyes, like you can just say Jerry's hard. You
Speaker 1: don't have to prepare him to me. But I was like,
Speaker 1: you literally he did. He's so cute. And my first
Speaker 1: impression really was like I didn't know how how animated
Speaker 1: and enthusiastic and giving and like like how much he
Speaker 1: laughs and gives and is like so so upbeat, so energetic,
Speaker 1: like I thought he would just be like I mean,
Speaker 1: this guy's been around for fucking ever. He is the
Speaker 1: goat like he is, he has no reason to have
Speaker 1: any enthusiasm. He could be what ever he wants to be.
Speaker 1: He could be very jaded, um, but he was like
Speaker 1: a true fan of mine and my walk away from
Speaker 1: the whole thing. He invited us to sit down. He goes,
Speaker 1: what do you want? Do you want to stop? Do
Speaker 1: you want to drink? Do? What? What do you want? What?
Speaker 1: Do we have? Everything? And he introduced us to his openers,
Speaker 1: Mario and what was the other guy's name. They're so cute,
Speaker 1: they were handsome men. And we just sat around and
Speaker 1: talked for like five minutes. Do you talk to Jerry
Speaker 1: Seinfeld about and who is the one who's like guiding
Speaker 1: in the conversation? Okay, so what we talked to me?
Speaker 1: First of all, I was like, I just want you
Speaker 1: to know I've seen all your YouTube's. He goes, I've
Speaker 1: seen everything you've done every I know everything about I
Speaker 1: have watched all of your stuff on YouTube. I know everything.
Speaker 1: Because she was at one point just like so I
Speaker 1: moved back to St. Louis. He's like, oh, I already
Speaker 1: know that, he goes, because I was telling his openers
Speaker 1: because they go where are you from? And Mario asked,
Speaker 1: and I go, They go, where do you live? And
Speaker 1: I go, I live in St. Louis And I go.
Speaker 1: And I looked at Jerry because usually people are shocked
Speaker 1: when they hear that I live. And I looked at Jerry,
Speaker 1: like it's true. And he goes, oh, I know you
Speaker 1: think I don't know that about I know, I'm like,
Speaker 1: did he But um, so I will say one thing
Speaker 1: that was really interesting and this will be good to
Speaker 1: Seinfeld fans. As he was like talking about I forget
Speaker 1: how we got on the subject of it, but I said,
Speaker 1: um oh, I told him listen. I know, you know,
Speaker 1: I know he hears about how great Seinfeld is all
Speaker 1: day long, but I just had to tell him. I
Speaker 1: was like, I have to say, I was you know
Speaker 1: you Seinfeld made me who I am in eighth grade,
Speaker 1: which is one of the coolest things that ever happened
Speaker 1: to me. My my algebra teacher, Gay King was his name,
Speaker 1: was the best algebra teacher name for eighth graders. Gay
Speaker 1: King was his name. Mr King. Mr King gave me
Speaker 1: um the weekend I was supposed to take a test
Speaker 1: on Friday, UM and Thursday night before the test was
Speaker 1: the finale of Seinfeld, and he knew how much it
Speaker 1: meant to me that I would not be able to
Speaker 1: study that night, so he let me take the test
Speaker 1: on Monday. And I've never heard of anything like that
Speaker 1: before since, and I just felt so seen. I thought, like,
Speaker 1: this is like he know, like it was almost like
Speaker 1: no one's ever given me that kind of like leeway
Speaker 1: for even if my grandma died. But this was because
Speaker 1: the Seinfeld finale, Like he took it seriously. And I
Speaker 1: don't even know if he was a Seinfeld fan, but
Speaker 1: I told Jerry that, and he goes, well, I'm sorry
Speaker 1: we disappointed you with the finale because the finale is
Speaker 1: class like panned by Sinfeld fans except me, thank god,
Speaker 1: because I've always loved the finale. I thought it had
Speaker 1: to be different than a regular Sinfeld episode and and
Speaker 1: I said, you know what, I actually like My favorite
Speaker 1: thing about the finale was the montage and the song,
Speaker 1: and he goes, I had the Time of your Life
Speaker 1: Green Day, and I was like, it's the best song
Speaker 1: to choose, and that has now used on so many montages.
Speaker 1: I hope you are the time of your life. But
Speaker 1: at the time, I think it was the first one
Speaker 1: that they used that and it made me cry. It's
Speaker 1: the best montage. And he was like, thank you, I
Speaker 1: chose that song, like he was very proud of his
Speaker 1: choice of that. And then he was talking about the
Speaker 1: finale and how and I go, if you don't remember
Speaker 1: the sign of finale, they all kind of go on
Speaker 1: trial for like making fun of this fat guy as
Speaker 1: he's like they were like making fun of someone as
Speaker 1: he's robbed, and they get on trial for like he
Speaker 1: gets robbed. It's like they're really mean. And then they
Speaker 1: go on trial and they all go to jail pretty
Speaker 1: much and they're nish at the end. And he said,
Speaker 1: I regret that because I did that because everyone I
Speaker 1: was listening to critics. I was listening to people say
Speaker 1: that these people are bad people, they're mean people. They
Speaker 1: and I was like, well, then if everyone thinks that
Speaker 1: way about them, they need to come up in And
Speaker 1: that's what he wanted to do with that episode, was
Speaker 1: show that like it's not okay to be a bad
Speaker 1: person a selfish person. And he goes, but they weren't
Speaker 1: bad people. I look back on it, and I let
Speaker 1: critics convinced me that they were bad people. They weren't
Speaker 1: bad people. Everyone's selfish common they were people. They were people,
Speaker 1: and he regretted that. And then he also though said
Speaker 1: as much as he wished, he wouldn't have listened to
Speaker 1: the critics. He said, He's I forget who he quoted.
Speaker 1: It was someone if some artists he had quoted saying like,
Speaker 1: there's no idiot whose advice I can't benefit from. Every
Speaker 1: idiot has some piece something that you can hear, Like
Speaker 1: every YouTube comment, there's something to be gleaned that you
Speaker 1: can take us feedback as an artist. And I liked
Speaker 1: that because I hate when people are like get mad
Speaker 1: at the audience. My biggest pet peeve, as you probably know,
Speaker 1: is like when comedians are on stage and they tell
Speaker 1: a joke and they're like, oh, you guys just don't
Speaker 1: get that this crowd fucking sucks, and they get mad
Speaker 1: at the crowd. I'm like, no, you suck the crowd.
Speaker 1: There have been shitty crowds, for sure, that are just
Speaker 1: dumb or they're not listening. But you are an art
Speaker 1: you need to adjust. You need either go to their
Speaker 1: level or like acknowledge that this room is full of
Speaker 1: drunk people or acknowledge that this room is full of
Speaker 1: people talk. You need to figure out a way, Like
Speaker 1: it might be hard, it might be impossible, but like
Speaker 1: blaming the crowd is so lame to me, And so
Speaker 1: I liked hearing that because even when people go, you
Speaker 1: don't need to listen to that person's opinion about you.
Speaker 1: Stop reading the comments, which I don't read anymore because
Speaker 1: they just hurt me too much. But I do think
Speaker 1: that you know, we're trying to entertain the masses, like
Speaker 1: some feedback can be helpful, even if it's like you're
Speaker 1: a fat slut and all I should I okay, well
Speaker 1: I do dye my hair? Maybe I could take you
Speaker 1: did spell die wrong? And unintentionally, But he was saying
Speaker 1: he was working on a new film and that he
Speaker 1: was asking for all kinds of feedback from all kinds
Speaker 1: of folks, and he didn't necessarily love the feedback the
Speaker 1: network was giving him, but he was like, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: listen to it to be open minded, And they're right,
Speaker 1: that's so cool because you just I always thought of
Speaker 1: him as like such a lone wolf. Like he is,
Speaker 1: so he knows how to do his own set and
Speaker 1: he doesn't take advice from anyone else, which is still
Speaker 1: true because I said, you know, this is interesting, Jerry,
Speaker 1: because I've been thinking about my stand up set and
Speaker 1: how I approached My roasts have always been the thing
Speaker 1: that everyone applauds me for the most, like my roasts,
Speaker 1: and there's a part of me that doesn't feel like
Speaker 1: I can take credit for it because it was such
Speaker 1: a process that I invited other writers into other comedians,
Speaker 1: and I had a lot of help on roast. Even
Speaker 1: though I wrote many, if not most, of the jokes,
Speaker 1: I got a lot of help. Um And for some reason,
Speaker 1: I go and I don't know why I don't do
Speaker 1: the same with my stand up, Like why am I
Speaker 1: not getting help from people? And he goes, no, No,
Speaker 1: your stand up is you know you're doing everything right.
Speaker 1: You don't need He goes, for example, I'm working on
Speaker 1: this bit about playing poker and how I don't care
Speaker 1: about my It was some you know, very early bit
Speaker 1: that he's working on, and he goes, no, one's gonna
Speaker 1: be able to tag that up for me, or you know,
Speaker 1: tag being a joke on after a punch line, He's like,
Speaker 1: no one knows that's that's in my head. That's my
Speaker 1: own bird. No one can, no one can help me
Speaker 1: with that. And so it was he was He was
Speaker 1: very very full of juxtaposition of like listen to people,
Speaker 1: but also do your own thing. Like but the one
Speaker 1: thing I will always try to remember is that he said,
Speaker 1: at one point I was talking and telling a story
Speaker 1: and he looked at his friends and he goes her voice,
Speaker 1: even her, the way she talks is funny. She has
Speaker 1: a voice. What do you say? She has the comedy voice.
Speaker 1: She's got the comedy voice. And I was just like,
Speaker 1: it was. Oh. The best was when he he christened
Speaker 1: to you a jew and no, I'm sorry, and was like,
Speaker 1: you're sorry. He was like laughing and he was like
Speaker 1: you're not because you are you are and I go, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, I wish I were. And he goes glazer
Speaker 1: and you go, I know people always think that, and
Speaker 1: he goes, you are what you are and I go, okay,
Speaker 1: then I am. I said, that's how you know if
Speaker 1: you're Jewish, you're Jewish, because if your mom is Jewish
Speaker 1: Jewish or Jerry Seinfeld says you're Jewish, those are the
Speaker 1: two ways, and so I'm Jewish. It was such an
Speaker 1: amazing thing to just be in the room for that,
Speaker 1: because I was I'm pretty like unflappable, and my eyes
Speaker 1: teared up several times, and I was like, why am
Speaker 1: I crying right now? I was looking at the carpet
Speaker 1: like pull it together on you. No one could tell,
Speaker 1: but I was just going, Wow, this man has touched
Speaker 1: all of our lives so much like Curb Your Enthusiasm
Speaker 1: Larry David Seinfeld, Julia, Louis Dreyfus, Veep, like so many
Speaker 1: things I love in my life are due to the
Speaker 1: Laugh Factory. I mean everything, you know, It's been so
Speaker 1: culturally impactive, maybe more so than any one we anyone
Speaker 1: you can think of, like in terms of how influential
Speaker 1: he has been. He was so abulliant, Like you do
Speaker 1: think he's going to be jaded, but he was just
Speaker 1: so full of joy and look like he had the
Speaker 1: most eyes and he was just like staring at Nick.
Speaker 1: He's smiling like a hundred percent joy the whole time.
Speaker 1: But I really, like, I know my great people have
Speaker 1: said him funny before, Conan says him funny, like all
Speaker 1: my heroes saying funny, And you guys know, as my
Speaker 1: besties that I doubt that sometimes and I think I'm
Speaker 1: tricking people or I'm like, you know, I figured it out,
Speaker 1: but it's not real, like for some reason, like I
Speaker 1: really I gotta I'm gonna remember the way he said that,
Speaker 1: like if he like I can't question Jerry Simon, not
Speaker 1: that I can question Conan either, but sometimes I'm like
Speaker 1: Conan is just being nice, like and yeah, I've I've
Speaker 1: done well in his show, but like I was, I
Speaker 1: don't know, I just sometimes can I gotta just remember this?
Speaker 1: For some reason, Jerry really got through to me of
Speaker 1: like no, he's a legitimate fan of mine and like
Speaker 1: wants to hear what I have to say. And it
Speaker 1: was like and he was like, you should have been
Speaker 1: in my movie. We should have put her in my movie.
Speaker 1: God it like he was so mad. And then Anya's like,
Speaker 1: then you guys need to work together on just being
Speaker 1: my agent. She's like, you need to put her in something.
Speaker 1: You guys need something I didn't know Comedians and Cars
Speaker 1: is over? Is it? I feel like he would have
Speaker 1: said that I've seen every single one and I would
Speaker 1: love to see you guys do it. But then Anya,
Speaker 1: Anya's just like I'm like, this is my opener. They
Speaker 1: don't even know if she doesn't like they're not really
Speaker 1: It was so fast when we were all introwing that
Speaker 1: it was unclear. And then we you know, we have
Speaker 1: a friend in common, Ryan Hamilton's, and we were talking
Speaker 1: about his news stand up and um and as like
Speaker 1: it's this great twenty minutes about his accident he had
Speaker 1: and all this stuff, and Jerry's like, we should produce it.
Speaker 1: You and I we're gonna produce it. So he like
Speaker 1: a deal that night, and he even said, I know
Speaker 1: this sounds like just this Hollywood, like we're not going
Speaker 1: to do it, but we're doing this. And then so
Speaker 1: Anya and I went and saw Ryan Hamilton's said last night,
Speaker 1: and I feel like we're going to get the wheels
Speaker 1: in motion on this. We are. It's so good. It
Speaker 1: was so fun. It was like, I don't I'm still
Speaker 1: pinching myself. What did your parents say? They? UM, I
Speaker 1: haven't got you know what. I texted them, just the picture.
Speaker 1: I was like, you're never gonna believe it, and then
Speaker 1: they just like hearted it. I haven't talked to them
Speaker 1: yet because I've been on this girl's trip, but there
Speaker 1: I did say, like he was he's a huge fan
Speaker 1: of mine. Take how much you think he would be
Speaker 1: excited to see me in your Wildest Dreams and multiply
Speaker 1: it by a hundred, because it literally was like, I'm
Speaker 1: not joking you. I've never would have thought that Jerry
Speaker 1: Seinfeld would be that excited to meet me. It I
Speaker 1: literally said to him, are you doing an impression of
Speaker 1: how excited I should be? Like it felt like it
Speaker 1: felt like the way that I was trying to suppress,
Speaker 1: like the version of myself is totally unbridled happiness in
Speaker 1: excitement was the way he was. I was kind of
Speaker 1: like he could easy fan girl Like it was that much.
Speaker 1: I can't wait for your parents to hear. That was
Speaker 1: definitely the highlight of one of the highlights of the year.
Speaker 1: There surely was. And also the weirdest thing is we're
Speaker 1: playing a manifestation game with the girls chain, like play
Speaker 1: the game of in your Wildest Dreams. Let's say a
Speaker 1: phone call happens, you pick up the phone, what is
Speaker 1: the great news on the other end? And we're all
Speaker 1: making lists, and one thing on my list this is
Speaker 1: a month ago I was like, I want to produce
Speaker 1: a comedy special or work with a comedian would love
Speaker 1: if it's Nikki, but any you know, like I would
Speaker 1: love to work more closely with comedians in terms of
Speaker 1: like working on a special. You said produce a comedy special,
Speaker 1: and I was thinking, well, I've ever heard this dream?
Speaker 1: What's going on here? And then all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: Jerry's like, we're producing it. Yeah. I told Jerry, I go,
Speaker 1: I want I want ran to do this, but he
Speaker 1: just keeps saying he's going to shelve it, and I
Speaker 1: want to produce it, and he goes, you should produce it,
Speaker 1: and I go yeah, and then he goes, I'll do
Speaker 1: it with you. I'm like, this is a joke. So
Speaker 1: there's a plug for speaking your dreams into existence. I'm
Speaker 1: telling you. I talked about it last week on the
Speaker 1: podcast about doing mantras, and I got a lot of
Speaker 1: feedback from besties about my new mantra of I Approve
Speaker 1: of Myself, I Approve of myself. And I was doing
Speaker 1: it this morning because I was on my way to
Speaker 1: a shoot and I was feeling like just chalky skin
Speaker 1: and like kind of just bloated from too much like
Speaker 1: food last night late at night, and I was just
Speaker 1: feeling like m warning warning, White Lotus spoiler alert ahead.
Speaker 1: White Lotus spoiler alert ahead. If you have not watched
Speaker 1: the finale of White Lotus season two, please skip ahead
Speaker 1: at least two minutes. It maybe more than that. I
Speaker 1: am sorry if it is warning warning. White Lotus spoiler
Speaker 1: alert commencing. Now, you know Jennifer Coolich when she fell
Speaker 1: off that yacht and just was floating in that ocean,
Speaker 1: I just felt really confused and puffy and you know,
Speaker 1: just betrayed, and I was like, I approve of myself.
Speaker 1: I approve of myself. I guys, spoiler alert. I do
Speaker 1: a great Jennifer Coolidge. I've realized this now. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: by the way, I just gave away the ending of
Speaker 1: White Lotus. Fuck wait, let me do this? Can you
Speaker 1: do it underwater? I approving myself? Oh wow, I was trying.
Speaker 1: I was so sad White Lotus. If you guys haven't
Speaker 1: seen the finale, I'm sorry, UM to spoil it. We'll
Speaker 1: do an insert of a spoiler alert for that because
Speaker 1: that one's really important. Um, but yeah, I can't do.
Speaker 1: We were working this weekend. My Jennifer Coolidge is like,
Speaker 1: have you been watching White Lotus? Noah, m hm no, no,
Speaker 1: you have not. Um, I think most of the nation
Speaker 1: has watched it. I think it's like the like being
Speaker 1: hungry or not, Like I've watched my appetite, now I'm hungry.
Speaker 1: Now I've Oh that fish looks good? Oh man, why
Speaker 1: did I have to die? I wanted to be on
Speaker 1: the next season? Oh god? Um, but it's a little off.
Speaker 1: I need to watch it again. So good, And I
Speaker 1: know people who haven't seen it yet are probably like
Speaker 1: stopped talking about it, and people who have seen it
Speaker 1: are like wanting to hear more about it. I even
Speaker 1: this morning with my makeup artist, I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: still like recovering from White Lotus, Like I'm still can
Speaker 1: I just say my final thoughts about White Lotus? Do it? She? No?
Speaker 1: What do you care if I spoil it for you? No?
Speaker 1: I don't care. You promise, yeah, because like for me,
Speaker 1: it's watching the whole thing. It's not just like the
Speaker 1: ending that counts, you know what I mean? So I
Speaker 1: don't care about this. Okay, well let me just talk
Speaker 1: in code. Then what happens at the end of White Lotus.
Speaker 1: It's a great ending. Everything I agree with. I agree
Speaker 1: with the couples all getting together at the end through
Speaker 1: that fucked up web of betrayal. I loved that. I
Speaker 1: loved um. I loved the deception from UH the the
Speaker 1: like UH sex workers. I love that whole thing, Like
Speaker 1: they not only deceived the guys, but they deceived us
Speaker 1: as viewers with the Elicio character. I thought it was brilliant.
Speaker 1: But someone didn't need to die. That didn't need to happen.
Speaker 1: We I love how I'm talking about. We what happened
Speaker 1: before that person died was enough of the cool thing.
Speaker 1: We didn't need to see that person die. It was
Speaker 1: like it didn't give us anything. It was enough of
Speaker 1: an ending for her to have that, to get the
Speaker 1: bag and go in the room and then the guys
Speaker 1: come up and that whole thing that happened, that was enough,
Speaker 1: and for her to just they could have panned out
Speaker 1: for her on the boat, just being like oh God,
Speaker 1: and you could have just seen her like worried and
Speaker 1: like what's gonna happen and you know she's gonna be
Speaker 1: safe and it's gonna have a lot of explaining to do,
Speaker 1: but that, and they could have left something so that
Speaker 1: you know, she's going to have a trail where she
Speaker 1: can get you know, she's not gonna be found guilty,
Speaker 1: but she's gonna be able to have proof that they
Speaker 1: were going to kill her. You know, I'll tell you
Speaker 1: why I think that happened. Why Because I think that
Speaker 1: we need to have no hope. That's what this show
Speaker 1: is saying. I think that it's a centrist view of
Speaker 1: love and life on purpose in a big way. I
Speaker 1: think it's exaggerated cynicism, and that's why we lose the
Speaker 1: person we love the most. I don't hate Cameron and
Speaker 1: Daphne's relationship. I have to as someone who's like, I
Speaker 1: don't like the lying because they both do lie to
Speaker 1: each other, but if they both were honest with each other,
Speaker 1: that they both they're having ad time. But she did
Speaker 1: have tears in her eyes when she found out if
Speaker 1: she doesn't the best actress for that betrayal the nuance
Speaker 1: of her sadness, like I'm okay. So I read some
Speaker 1: synopsis of it, and it was like, we see her
Speaker 1: get over the betrayal of an affair in point five seconds.
Speaker 1: I'm getting like the hurt and then shake it off,
Speaker 1: and you just see that this woman has had to
Speaker 1: do it so many times that the half life is
Speaker 1: now milliseconds for her to get over it. And it's
Speaker 1: just I mean, it's like Elizabeth Shovel acting because Elizabeth
Speaker 1: Moss used to say so much with just her eyes
Speaker 1: on mad men on handmade's tale she can do, Like,
Speaker 1: all right, we're gonna go to break and come back
Speaker 1: with a new segment after this and we're back. Um,
Speaker 1: just a reminder that my tour, the Good Girl Tour,
Speaker 1: is ongoing, and um, we have a couple three days
Speaker 1: left for the rest of the year. This weekend, it's
Speaker 1: Oklahoma City on Friday, Tulsa, Oklahoma on Saturday, and then
Speaker 1: on December thirty one, New Year's Eve special St. Louis Show,
Speaker 1: So those tickets are available. Meeting grades are always available
Speaker 1: at the Merch boot as long, as well as tons
Speaker 1: of new merch that I wish I could wear myself.
Speaker 1: But it has my face on it, so it's kind
Speaker 1: of weird, but it's so cute. I almost wish it
Speaker 1: wasn't so cute because I'm jealous and I want it
Speaker 1: on my body. You can get away with the Navy,
Speaker 1: for sure. It's not too obvious. It's kind of where
Speaker 1: a hall ask Okay, cool? Um, Yeah, the Navy one
Speaker 1: is so good. All of them are good. Um and
Speaker 1: Anya will be there and with special guests all the time.
Speaker 1: Not sure who exactly now, but um yeah wait, Tim
Speaker 1: Confie actually is going to be on the New Year's
Speaker 1: TV show and Anya as well, and so I hope
Speaker 1: to see you guys there. And let's get to our
Speaker 1: new segment that we have. Noah came up with a
Speaker 1: great idea. Um. It is where we go back in
Speaker 1: time and review a headline from the past and kind
Speaker 1: of talk about the headline itself, but also like where
Speaker 1: we were when this thing happened. It's a chance for
Speaker 1: us just to go back to time a little bit.
Speaker 1: So let's get too old news old that was recorded
Speaker 1: this weekend. That sounds so good, it's great, well done. Noah, Okay, Noah,
Speaker 1: what is the old news for us? Old news headline
Speaker 1: goes back to uh Nicki and Sarah of MTVS. Nicki
Speaker 1: and Sarah Alive choose two fans of the show to
Speaker 1: take over their hosting duties and they surprised them with
Speaker 1: a one direction interview. And now I want to share
Speaker 1: this because it's important because what was going on in
Speaker 1: the news is Uh, it was just upon the Harry
Speaker 1: Styles and Taylor Swift breakup, and uh, I want everyone
Speaker 1: to see what happens next. No, well it was Taylor Swift.
Speaker 1: You want to ask my questions? Okay, so you're surprising.
Speaker 1: What did she say about Taylor Swift? What was so?
Speaker 1: Harry Styles asks, what were you guys listening to the
Speaker 1: headphones on the way over? Because the girls were blindfolded,
Speaker 1: We had them listening to headphones. They had no idea
Speaker 1: that they were going to be interviewing one direction. There's
Speaker 1: so much of a story behind this. So so as
Speaker 1: I was going down this rabbit hole, I realized that
Speaker 1: the girl who said she was listening to Taylor Swift
Speaker 1: right as um like it was. It was right after
Speaker 1: the breakup I had. I just want to show you
Speaker 1: this Harry and Taylor. Yeah, and she's saying this to
Speaker 1: Harry Style. She's saying it to Harry Styles, And I
Speaker 1: just want you to look a freeze frame of the
Speaker 1: reaction of the know that they broke up. Yeah, she
Speaker 1: was just telling the truth. Look at their faces when
Speaker 1: she said that she was listening to Taylor Swift. They
Speaker 1: all know, They're like, oh ship, they loved it. So
Speaker 1: this when I is that the People's Choice Award. Olivia
Speaker 1: Wilde was there and you know her and Harry just
Speaker 1: broke up, right. I did not know that Olivia. I
Speaker 1: didn't know Olivia wild was going to be there. In backstage,
Speaker 1: they were doing like these photo shoots like with these
Speaker 1: really nice photographers, and during the photo shoot they had
Speaker 1: music on and they were playing like as it was,
Speaker 1: and she was like backstage and I'm like, tell someone
Speaker 1: to turn that off, like I mean because it's her exces. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like that kind of sucks for her or for like anyone,
Speaker 1: Like even Jason sadekis having to hear Harry styles like
Speaker 1: everywhere he goes. It's like a thing. But okay, So
Speaker 1: that Nicki and Sarah thing, how it came about was
Speaker 1: like I think we found out we were going to
Speaker 1: have five minutes with one direction, and we're like, that's
Speaker 1: how this idea starts. We go, what are we gonna
Speaker 1: do with that five minutes? Like, of all the things
Speaker 1: we can do, we can interview them. It's kind of
Speaker 1: like a press tour where they kind of sit in
Speaker 1: and then different you know, people come into the room
Speaker 1: and just interview them for five minutes and then you're
Speaker 1: ushered out. And we were like, oh, it would be
Speaker 1: a good idea if we found the biggest in direction
Speaker 1: fans and blindfolded them and somehow took off the blindfolds
Speaker 1: and there's one direction sitting there. So we convinced these
Speaker 1: girls that they were going to interview Kesha, which they
Speaker 1: were excited about, but like not huge. One direction was
Speaker 1: their lives. They ran one direction fan pages and all
Speaker 1: these things. So we blindfolded these girls and we thought
Speaker 1: they were going to like fucking lose their eyes, but
Speaker 1: they were like quiet and like just like shock and
Speaker 1: like it wasn't great TV. Like we thought it was
Speaker 1: gonna be like fucking insane, like they were gonna cry,
Speaker 1: but they were kind of just like um high. And
Speaker 1: we were like, do you want to ask them some questions?
Speaker 1: But they didn't have any questions prepared because they had
Speaker 1: like thought they were going to Kesha, so they're like,
Speaker 1: you know, asking her about her, you know how she
Speaker 1: does her hair. Whatever. It was like, but it was
Speaker 1: just how TV can kind of like betray you sometimes
Speaker 1: where you're like this is the best and then they
Speaker 1: were just so nervous and they were so sweet and everything.
Speaker 1: Um did you know the one thing I remember from that?
Speaker 1: Sorry before you what? Did I know? What? So apparently
Speaker 1: two years ago the girl who said Taylor Swift went
Speaker 1: on TikTok and she kind of made this moment viral.
Speaker 1: I couldn't find it, so if anyone does have it,
Speaker 1: I'd love to see it. I think I remember this
Speaker 1: like she Catherine is her name, and I really liked her.
Speaker 1: We followed each other for a while after that, and
Speaker 1: I was, I like, I love those little girls. They
Speaker 1: were so sweet and they put up with so much
Speaker 1: that day because it was so they had to be
Speaker 1: blindfolded for like so long, we drove them around. It
Speaker 1: was all just like it sucked for them. Said she
Speaker 1: didn't and then obviously it didn't suck. Yeah, she didn't
Speaker 1: do it on purpose. It was just like the truth
Speaker 1: had just come out apparently, you know, and and Taylor
Speaker 1: Swift yeah yeah, because they asked, what are you listening
Speaker 1: to on those headphones? And we had just gotten into
Speaker 1: Red had just come out, I think, and so they
Speaker 1: were definitely listening to that. But um, that was like
Speaker 1: because we didn't last surprises on that show, like we
Speaker 1: thought another time. We always used Kesha as the thing
Speaker 1: like another time, because Kesha was our first guest on show.
Speaker 1: Another time, Sarah and I went to Vegas because we
Speaker 1: thought we were interviewing Kesha, and we were like, we
Speaker 1: don't need to, we already interviewed her. What is going
Speaker 1: on here? So we flew to Vegas and we're like,
Speaker 1: what is this And we're sitting there waiting for Kesh
Speaker 1: as she's late, and then all of a sudden, Justin
Speaker 1: Timberly walks in and he was like the reason we
Speaker 1: got that TV show because we created a viral video
Speaker 1: in two thousand eleven or twelve about Justin Timberly begging
Speaker 1: him to come back to music, and that was the
Speaker 1: reason we even got the MTV show. And so our
Speaker 1: show was like based on surprises, but it was just
Speaker 1: I was like, I remember everyone was just like oh man,
Speaker 1: Like they just didn't react the way we wanted them to.
Speaker 1: But I mean I would I don't know why we
Speaker 1: didn't see that coming. I would have freaking I would
Speaker 1: have been so like just if they did that to
Speaker 1: me with Taylor Swift and these GROLs. But I will
Speaker 1: say the thing I got I took away because these
Speaker 1: they were little boys. I was like twenty seven or eight.
Speaker 1: I was twenty seven at the time, and they're just
Speaker 1: children to me. But I remember looking at Merry Styles
Speaker 1: and being like, oh my god, I hit it like
Speaker 1: just gorgeous. And I never felt that way where you
Speaker 1: see someone in person you go except Harry Sidefeld, where
Speaker 1: you just go, whoa this is This kid is special
Speaker 1: and so um. Didn't you also interview Ariana Grande? Yeah,
Speaker 1: she did a segment with us too. That was awesome.
Speaker 1: She was so funny. Um. She was particular about having
Speaker 1: one side of her face showing and not the other.
Speaker 1: She definitely had a good side. That was the first
Speaker 1: time I've ever seen that. But she wasn't rude about it.
Speaker 1: She was so funny too. We had Ariana Grande fire
Speaker 1: people on our show. It really funny segment, and so
Speaker 1: we have her like just like Brian, you make too
Speaker 1: much fish in the microwave, you have to go now,
Speaker 1: And Sarah and I are just sitting there like sorry,
Speaker 1: Ariana Grande, and it was like, this is the nicest
Speaker 1: way we can let you go, and it was just
Speaker 1: beautiful and she was so funny and down like. We
Speaker 1: did a lot of fun stuff on that show. I
Speaker 1: know I love the nude onesies. Oh yeah. That was
Speaker 1: the first time I ever did something where I was
Speaker 1: like embarrassed, like where I like showed my body a lot.
Speaker 1: We like put on these nude One season, we went
Speaker 1: to a lingerie convention and just put on lingerie. It
Speaker 1: was the easiest gay to try. And we looked naked.
Speaker 1: I mean it was like and Sarah was older than me,
Speaker 1: She was a lot more comfortable with her body and
Speaker 1: like just being more physically out there and I'm more
Speaker 1: of like I'm a comedian I say words, So it
Speaker 1: was like a very it was a test of my
Speaker 1: like comfort And we did that show live, which was
Speaker 1: it was so good. Your news segments were so funny. Yes,
Speaker 1: oh yeah. Fun fun Reel was a segment that Emmy Blocknek,
Speaker 1: who was an amazing comedian, came up with where we
Speaker 1: would just ask two really fun questions like favorite color
Speaker 1: red or green? Um, what's your favorite animal? Whale or sharks?
Speaker 1: Or yeah, we go like red or green? Maybe green
Speaker 1: whale or sharks, sharks? Why do you think I'll die alone?
Speaker 1: And then just put the micro and then they just
Speaker 1: are like like it was just that was so fun.
Speaker 1: It was called Fun Fun Real. Yeah, we had a
Speaker 1: that was a good show, and we got two seasons
Speaker 1: of it. Like most of my shows for accounting, I've
Speaker 1: I've never gone past two seasons, including f boy. We're
Speaker 1: gonna go somewhere else, including boyfriends. Honestly, that's so true
Speaker 1: or up to months, I'm out. This podcast is probably
Speaker 1: the long serious was like a long run for me.
Speaker 1: Well that's like I was talking about buying a house,
Speaker 1: or like last night we were looking at property around
Speaker 1: here and I was like, maybe I could do it,
Speaker 1: And Jesus Christ, it's so much money, Like after you
Speaker 1: do property tax and h o A fees, after training
Speaker 1: a property, after you auto property tacks and you look
Speaker 1: at the h A fees and you just think of me,
Speaker 1: I gotta tip the doorman Christmas and you factor all
Speaker 1: in that and it's maybe not even worth it. Um
Speaker 1: in the it's like, were you and Anya friends? Were
Speaker 1: you living together yet? Yeah? We lived together. I remember
Speaker 1: Nikki's So that's where I was when that story broke,
Speaker 1: probably sitting in the kitchen ordering Chinese from from the
Speaker 1: guy down the street who would knock on the door
Speaker 1: and then give me my plastic bag and he'd say,
Speaker 1: I have enjoyed, have enjoy, which is like such a
Speaker 1: sweet have enjoyed. Um. Yeah, So I got the pilot
Speaker 1: for Nicki and Sarah Um in two thousand twelve. We
Speaker 1: were going to film it January twelve, and it was
Speaker 1: really yeah, we got picked up to film in two
Speaker 1: thousand eleven, so it was like wow. It was like
Speaker 1: August of two thousand eleven, we found out, Okay, we're
Speaker 1: going to film this pilot in January, and we're starting
Speaker 1: to put together staff. And then it was like two
Speaker 1: months later that I was like, I gotta quit drinking.
Speaker 1: So I quit drinking in November or December of two
Speaker 1: thousand eleven because I was like, I can't funk up this,
Speaker 1: like I can't be hungover making this show. And so
Speaker 1: that's how I always kind of remember it. And then
Speaker 1: we take the pilot in January, and then we were
Speaker 1: told we had to take another, but then we taped
Speaker 1: another pilot in April because they weren't satisfied with that.
Speaker 1: Then we got picked up in September, and then we
Speaker 1: didn't air until January of two thousand and thirteen, and
Speaker 1: then we got canceled. Um. I think you know November
Speaker 1: two thousand thirteen. So we did two seasons in one year,
Speaker 1: and then by two fourteen it was like, what am
Speaker 1: I gonna do? But um, I moved in with Anya
Speaker 1: two thousand and twelve, October October. Oh yeah, so I
Speaker 1: did the pilot when I was still living in that
Speaker 1: terrible place. And then yeah, the whole time I made
Speaker 1: the show, I was in a story it was terrible. Yeah, um,
Speaker 1: but that really marked the you know, I always told
Speaker 1: my parents when I got into comedy, like, give me
Speaker 1: until I'm. I gave said give me till I'm. That
Speaker 1: was always no. Twenties seven, I said, to give me
Speaker 1: twenty seven is when I'm going to make it, like
Speaker 1: just until then, have my back and they you know,
Speaker 1: and I'm just lucky. They definitely bailed me out financially,
Speaker 1: and I've paid them back since then. But like if
Speaker 1: I wouldn't have been able to do it if I
Speaker 1: wasn't like my parents didn't help me out financially here
Speaker 1: and there. Um, so I'm realized that I'm lucky and
Speaker 1: privileged in that way a lot of people don't have.
Speaker 1: But I remember I got the show, the pilot got
Speaker 1: picked up. Oh I remember it was. It was like
Speaker 1: May thirty one, of my the eve I was about
Speaker 1: to turn twenty eight, and the last day that I
Speaker 1: was twenty seven was the day that our pilot got
Speaker 1: picked up or that we got our Yeah, that we
Speaker 1: got our pilot pick it was May thirty one, and
Speaker 1: then by January, so it was two thousand and eleven.
Speaker 1: Would that have been twenty seven years old? Um? And
Speaker 1: and that was when I was like, oh, it was
Speaker 1: just just under the wire where I was like, okay,
Speaker 1: now I have like a paycheck coming in. It was awesome.
Speaker 1: Speak it into existence. Did I approve of myself? I
Speaker 1: approve of myself. I approved of myself. I approved of myself.
Speaker 1: I greg proops of myself. Like it just starts to
Speaker 1: sound like nothing, but yeah. A lot of besties wrote
Speaker 1: me and we're like, oh my god, I'm so glad
Speaker 1: you're getting into mantras. Do you ever do those? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I haven't done one a while, but I liked for
Speaker 1: a while I was doing I Am a Seductive and
Speaker 1: feminine being or something like that. Because I was someone
Speaker 1: told me like, you're not in touch with your sexuality.
Speaker 1: This is like three years ago, and I was like,
Speaker 1: maybe I'm not. I'm always wearing like chunky boots and
Speaker 1: and it was so uncomfortable I'm describing her. I'm right
Speaker 1: back to my old fashioned sensibility. Um, but yeah, I
Speaker 1: worked on the STU that that's a good one. I'm
Speaker 1: a sensual and sexual being. I'm gonna start trying that one.
Speaker 1: It probably works. I don't thought money comes to me
Speaker 1: easily and swiftly. Good things come to me easily and swiftly.
Speaker 1: I do that one to let things come to me
Speaker 1: easily and swiftly. I like the word swiftly. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of what I want to manifest next,
Speaker 1: because even like if I were to be like I
Speaker 1: want to produce a special, I'm like, oh, that's a
Speaker 1: lot of work. Like I want to do something that
Speaker 1: I like doing it in the present tense, like I
Speaker 1: am producing a special that I love with people I love. Well,
Speaker 1: that's just delusional because you're not. But you're I like
Speaker 1: to do things that actually are true too, Like, um,
Speaker 1: I approve of myself, like even if I don't, well,
Speaker 1: I guess that's true because I don't want I'm saying it. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're right. The only reason is to conjure up the
Speaker 1: feeling of what it would feel like to do it,
Speaker 1: and then they're like, oh, that's how people who are
Speaker 1: filling the blank feel like if you're a billionaire, how
Speaker 1: would a billionaire feel like? I have ample money for
Speaker 1: the rest of my life for myself and my family. Ah,
Speaker 1: that's I approve of myself. Really, just for some reason,
Speaker 1: the Louise Hey recording like that really struck me because
Speaker 1: it's like, if you have that, you have everything. If
Speaker 1: you no matter because you can be anything, you can
Speaker 1: look anyway, you can have any amount of money. If
Speaker 1: you approve of yourself, it's okay. And so it just
Speaker 1: that one really like that helps me. I approve of myself.
Speaker 1: I approve of myself. Um, and so that's a good
Speaker 1: one to just say to yourself in the back of
Speaker 1: an uber over and over and over and your score
Speaker 1: will also go down. Uber. But that's okay. But um,
Speaker 1: I have to go because I am actually going to
Speaker 1: go get a shot into my clitoris. I'm going to
Speaker 1: that place called the V Spot. So at Atlantic City
Speaker 1: at the meet and greet, there was this doctor that
Speaker 1: was in line and she was like, have you been
Speaker 1: to the v spot and I was like, I think
Speaker 1: I have actually because another woman back in the serious
Speaker 1: days offered it to me. And they do a thing
Speaker 1: called um PRP where they like extract your blood, they
Speaker 1: spin it around a machine and then they put it
Speaker 1: back into you and it's supposed to like I don't
Speaker 1: know what it does and hands here c literal experience. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's gonna wake me up down there, even though thank
Speaker 1: you Seinfeld, like I feel alive. That was that hit
Speaker 1: me too? Um No, like and THEO James White lotus
Speaker 1: I They're just gonna put me in a room and
Speaker 1: make me watch close ups of his face. But I'm
Speaker 1: going to get that done. I'm kind of like not
Speaker 1: feeling like doing it, to be honest with you, because
Speaker 1: I'm like, I just kind of want to take a
Speaker 1: nap and I have to go get a a fucking
Speaker 1: needle put into my clip it. Um. And I've been
Speaker 1: talking about on stage about how like guys don't like
Speaker 1: I hate to do jokes about like guys you don't
Speaker 1: know where, but I don't think I think a lot
Speaker 1: of them don't know that there's like a hood over it,
Speaker 1: like there's like a flap of skin that sometimes you
Speaker 1: have to lift up to access. But then I learned
Speaker 1: from Taylor and from Anya that they don't want that
Speaker 1: flap lifted up. They need that protection because it's too sensitive. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm you know, I'm open to both things,
Speaker 1: but it doesn't always have to get lifted up. It's
Speaker 1: like a treasure chest. Yes, Taylor said, I like it
Speaker 1: allmuh smushed it all smushed together. What do you feel? No,
Speaker 1: do you like do you like the hood to be
Speaker 1: lifted to get into the part? It's too intense two cents.
Speaker 1: I love intense. Well, then you're going to enjoy your
Speaker 1: afternoon at the vispa. She I'm getting. This is me
Speaker 1: like self care getting and I don't even need I
Speaker 1: don't even know what I need it for. I know
Speaker 1: I watched I have so much in my schedule, but
Speaker 1: then I watch you and you're like constantly scheduling new ships.
Speaker 1: I think it's going to be free. And I'm not
Speaker 1: doing this as like she didn't. I'm not advertising this
Speaker 1: place in any way for form, but this is the
Speaker 1: thing that happens when you kind of have a celebrity.
Speaker 1: As people go, you need to come by my spot.
Speaker 1: I'll take care of you, and you don't know if
Speaker 1: that is I'm going to shoot your clip and then
Speaker 1: charge you eight hundred dollars, or it means and like
Speaker 1: make you talk to me and take a picture, or
Speaker 1: it means I'm gonna hook it up because shout out
Speaker 1: to everyone who's ever hooked me up in the world. Like,
Speaker 1: I am very grateful for all the times people just
Speaker 1: give you things. But I don't know. So I'm going
Speaker 1: into this being like I might be out of pocket
Speaker 1: for something I don't want to really do, just but
Speaker 1: it was I can't turn down free stuff. I'm my
Speaker 1: mother's daughter. You're gonna turned down a clip hundred dollars?
Speaker 1: You kid me? Are you kid me? You on in
Speaker 1: there for me? Squid my squid salad? After that's literally
Speaker 1: what myvagina looks like lifetimes. It's just raw squit salad.
Speaker 1: Do discount in some salad. Um. So I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: do that and I will report to you next week
Speaker 1: for sure about how that all goes. Um. So thank
Speaker 1: you guys for listening to the podcast. Thank you for
Speaker 1: understanding our recording equipment. If it sounds a little weird,
Speaker 1: I forgot the equipment. I am I missed an essential
Speaker 1: piece of the elements. So um, we'll be back to
Speaker 1: sounding normal next week. And I love you and don't
Speaker 1: be kid, and thank you Anya, and thank you know
Speaker 1: what and you yeah, Jacklobe, we've done that one before,
Speaker 1: but why not jack up that needle and slamming it
Speaker 1: into my Clidy