Speaker 1: You're listening to Comedy Central. Wow, what's up? Here's edition listeners,
Speaker 1: It's Josh Johnson right for the Daily Show. You are
Speaker 1: about to hear an episode of one of our original
Speaker 1: Daily Show podcasts, hold Up, hosted by me and Daily
Speaker 1: Show correspondent Dulce Sloan. It's where we take our office
Speaker 1: banter into a weekly war words about topics big and small.
Speaker 1: In this episode, we debate happy hour versus brunch. Which
Speaker 1: lifestyle do you prefer? One that offers bottomless mimosas or
Speaker 1: happy hour specials? Tune in to find out which side
Speaker 1: of the debate we each land on. It's a great
Speaker 1: one and we hope you enjoy it. And if you
Speaker 1: like the show, check out the hold Up podcasts wherever
Speaker 1: you get your podcasts. Hey, everybody, welcome to hold Up.
Speaker 1: This is the show with big opinions about nothing, things
Speaker 1: that mean the world to us that maybe other people
Speaker 1: don't care about at all. I am one of your hosts.
Speaker 1: I'm a co host. My name is Josh Johnson. I'm
Speaker 1: a writer for the Daily Show, and I am joined
Speaker 1: by Don't Say Slan and certain more noises here great
Speaker 1: you rude, don't I'm rude, make noise. You can make
Speaker 1: a noise too, shit, Come on, just go bra bra
Speaker 1: no negro brack brack. You can't. I maybe try. You
Speaker 1: can't roll your tongue. I can, I can roll. But
Speaker 1: this not even what the episode is about. No do it.
Speaker 1: We're gonna talk about this. Do you do it? Ra
Speaker 1: ra r r r. It's it's not working. You can't
Speaker 1: do it. That's okay. A lot of people can't genetic,
Speaker 1: you know what, Just me time, give me time. It's fine, genetic.
Speaker 1: It's little genetic. My mom can't do it. But god see, well,
Speaker 1: today on the show, we're gonna be talking about something
Speaker 1: that's uh, that's close to both of us. I think
Speaker 1: people will be surprised at which side we landed on
Speaker 1: knowing us, because you know, now there's been thirty some
Speaker 1: odd episodes to get to know us. If you didn't
Speaker 1: before the show start, if you don't know us from
Speaker 1: stand up, if you don't know it's from the show,
Speaker 1: you know our personalities now. And so I think there
Speaker 1: are going to be some shocked, some shocked faces that
Speaker 1: we won't see because this is all audio. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: now it's on the YouTube, they can see my hair. Okay,
Speaker 1: yes it is. This is on YouTube. Yep, all happen, Josh,
Speaker 1: I am working on it. Okay, ever since my injury,
Speaker 1: I haven't been able to bench the same that I
Speaker 1: was benching before you broke tits. Today's episode, for those
Speaker 1: of you that don't know Josh that it didn't muscle
Speaker 1: injury to his uh pectoral muscles, which is if you
Speaker 1: don't know the titty muscle. Yes, yes, it is the meat.
Speaker 1: So today's episode is happy Hour versus brunch. By the way,
Speaker 1: this comment came from Little Sailboat. We check out the
Speaker 1: comments when you leave them, So shoot us a suggestion
Speaker 1: on what you want to hear us talk about anyway,
Speaker 1: dull say, get into it. Do you want to tell
Speaker 1: the people where you landed? I think you should start. Okay,
Speaker 1: what I want to do? What I want to do.
Speaker 1: What I want to do is, first of all, before
Speaker 1: you say where you gonna be, before I say where
Speaker 1: Ey's gonna be, I want to give the people time
Speaker 1: to think. What do you think? Josh picked? What do
Speaker 1: I think? What do you think I picked? Play the music? Okay,
Speaker 1: we're done, Joshua, Um, I'm happy Hour. Wow, y'all didn't
Speaker 1: expect that, did you. No, No, you probably didn't because
Speaker 1: I don't drink. But I feel like happy hour has
Speaker 1: more benefits to society than brunch does. Well. I thought
Speaker 1: it was because of your love of discounted apps. It
Speaker 1: is partially, but it is half because you can get
Speaker 1: the half prize appetizers that um a happy Hour, but
Speaker 1: you don't have to buy alcohol to get them. I
Speaker 1: know that this is the other thing, is that I
Speaker 1: that obviously means that you're on the brunch side. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And my opinion is that happy hour makes life easier
Speaker 1: and better through discounts, while brunch makes it harder and
Speaker 1: more bougie for no reason, with orange juice and vodka. Okay,
Speaker 1: First of all, mimosa is orange juice and s champaigne.
Speaker 1: Oh champagne. Okay, that's that's my bad. I was thinking
Speaker 1: of screwdrivers. Yeah, but still not worth it. First of all,
Speaker 1: breakfast on a Sunday lasting till two pm, blessing two,
Speaker 1: sometimes three. I've in places that did the brunch till
Speaker 1: four o'clock because they know people party in their city, right,
Speaker 1: and church was till two almost brunch to go till four, right,
Speaker 1: That's why I don't like the fact that Golden KRL
Speaker 1: on a Sunday their breakfast ends at eleven sird. That's
Speaker 1: only the third hour of church. Yeah, you're trying to
Speaker 1: miss people. You're missing people like the Golden KRL. Like
Speaker 1: we were a Golden Crawl in Atlanta and they're like
Speaker 1: breakfast in at eleven and my mother went, what why?
Speaker 1: And she literally said, but people are still in church
Speaker 1: And the lady went, I know, yeah, everybody that worked
Speaker 1: I knew it was wrong, but it was like corpredd
Speaker 1: like no, even White Church and Georgia, it's still in
Speaker 1: out of eleven. Yeah, you gotta get people to one o'clock.
Speaker 1: Come on, now, you got to get to to get
Speaker 1: there to get dressed. Sunday you're supposed to be able
Speaker 1: to chill and get your breakfast. I shouldn't be in
Speaker 1: a hurry on Sunday to get some victles. That sounds wild.
Speaker 1: The thing about brunch, though, is one your mimosas are bottomless. Also,
Speaker 1: we have changed the lifestyle when it comes to brunch.
Speaker 1: So now it's not just orange juice. We've done expanded
Speaker 1: the juices. Okay, it's not about arrange no more. We
Speaker 1: all listen. I one day had bottomless mimosas and they
Speaker 1: had pomegranate juice. Baby girl, you know how expensive? How pricey? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Oh juice? That a poma grant not Oh have you
Speaker 1: heard it in the Bible. It might actually not be
Speaker 1: an apple that Eve is uh attempts Adam with. It's
Speaker 1: actually a pomegranate, That's what I heard too, Yeah, which
Speaker 1: would be very difficult to bite it into. That's desk wild.
Speaker 1: That's like so cool, I think, honestly, I think that
Speaker 1: that's why they got kicked out of the garden. It
Speaker 1: is because, like Adam bit into a whole pomegranate and
Speaker 1: the guy was like, you're too dumb to be here, Paradise.
Speaker 1: What are you doing? You two? You bit right into it.
Speaker 1: I told you not to eat it at all, and
Speaker 1: then you bit it in the face. I told you
Speaker 1: not to eat it at all anyway, Yeah, I told
Speaker 1: you to leave it alone. Maybe that's why pomegranate is
Speaker 1: so hard to open it to staine your fingers. But
Speaker 1: I got to I know how to sin. You stained
Speaker 1: with sin that like just a scarlet letter on your fingers,
Speaker 1: on your fingers and guilty for those of you that
Speaker 1: don't read anything. You missed all of these references. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: the Bible, to the Scarlet Letter, to the Sin in general.
Speaker 1: Get your bucks up. Call your mama because something is off.
Speaker 1: Your books up the most ratchet way I've heard. So
Speaker 1: would be told to become lit. Y'll get your books up.
Speaker 1: You ain't never read The Prince by Machiavelli. Get your books.
Speaker 1: Oh you've never read the Count of Monte Cristo. Why
Speaker 1: don't you get your books up? Kid? God what there
Speaker 1: were a lot of books I didn't read because Wishbone
Speaker 1: was on TV. Yeah. Yeah, Wishbone nullified the need to
Speaker 1: read several books, like because yeah, even though Wishbone, there's
Speaker 1: no way that they covered all the details. You still
Speaker 1: spoiled the whole story because we got the gist. I
Speaker 1: know they're doing, Yeah, I know what's doing. But when
Speaker 1: they did Cyrano Diversirac, I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: when they did Ulysses, when they did the Odyssey, I
Speaker 1: was like, okay, but you know the dog because the
Speaker 1: dog can't shoot the arrow because they hadn't have any thumbs.
Speaker 1: Oh so they had the fake little you remember more
Speaker 1: of the fake Yeah, to make it look like a
Speaker 1: dog shot of arrow. I remember they were doing Romeo
Speaker 1: and Juliet. My mom walked by them, was like, see
Speaker 1: you could go too far. Yeah, yeah, go too far. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's I mean. My mother fucked with uh wishbone. Who
Speaker 1: she didn't fuck with was Clifford. That's when my mother
Speaker 1: did not idea of you know what it is though.
Speaker 1: Clifford was a bad influence because Clifford is why to
Speaker 1: this day you'll go to a friend's house and they
Speaker 1: got a rabbit dog that doesn't have any home training,
Speaker 1: and everybody thinks it's cute because that's what Clifford was.
Speaker 1: Clifford would destroy a whole town, leave bodies mangled, right,
Speaker 1: houses and shampoos, and we were all like, he's big
Speaker 1: and he's red. Isn't that cute. It's like, nah, nah,
Speaker 1: there's an entire city living under a thread of devastation
Speaker 1: from this dog. Who is what a Doberman, a red
Speaker 1: golden what is it? A dog? Yeah? And so now
Speaker 1: I'll go to a friend's house and it's dog will
Speaker 1: be hissing on the wall and they're like, no, no, Pooky, don't,
Speaker 1: Oh my god. You know he's a puppy he's only five,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, that's so grown. That's so grown. But
Speaker 1: don't want to go by dog gears and that's in
Speaker 1: that dog and the dog thirty five mm. Oh, that's
Speaker 1: just a drunk uncle. Yep. And nobody, nobody has home
Speaker 1: traded all their dogs because we grew up on Clifford
Speaker 1: and we were like, oh, it's normal for your dog
Speaker 1: to be a terrorist. Listen. I remember as a little girl,
Speaker 1: I was like six years old and I came home
Speaker 1: with a Clifford book and I was sitting there, like
Speaker 1: reading a book from the library school, and mom was like,
Speaker 1: what's this. I said, it's Clifford, a big red dog.
Speaker 1: And she goes, m, that dog is too big, and
Speaker 1: then she just walked away. Yeah, but you you're also
Speaker 1: talking about somebody who had been an adult for too long.
Speaker 1: When you when you're an adult for enough years, you're like,
Speaker 1: I can't even this is not fun. When I was
Speaker 1: six years old, she was twenty seven. That's an adult.
Speaker 1: She's been a full adult for five years up for
Speaker 1: a while, as soon as I showed up. But like
Speaker 1: every time she's like that dog is too big. I
Speaker 1: see what the point is that dogs is so secured
Speaker 1: the number and a job. So when the cartoon came out,
Speaker 1: I remember they were like, my mate, they got a
Speaker 1: Clifford cartoon. They gave that big ass dog a cartoon
Speaker 1: for what I say, when I get a damn dogar
Speaker 1: Like she is not, and they came with a live
Speaker 1: action movie. She's like, don't you come up with me
Speaker 1: talking about that movie with that big ass dog? Like
Speaker 1: she was not a fan because she's being reasonable and
Speaker 1: she's plugging in. But okay, Like, as a kid, you're like, wow,
Speaker 1: what if I had a giant dog? Wouldn't that be
Speaker 1: cool when I could ride him and stuff? And then she,
Speaker 1: as a grown woman, is like, if there was a
Speaker 1: dog that big, there's no way it wouldn't be problems. Yes,
Speaker 1: it is now because now the dog's too big to
Speaker 1: even protect because now all the burglar has to do
Speaker 1: is run between his own legs and the dog won't
Speaker 1: be able to catch him. But then the dog could
Speaker 1: just just step on him. Maybe Clifford, clumsy Clifford might
Speaker 1: step on the front porch trying to kill the burglar.
Speaker 1: You know, it wouldn't be helpful if you tried to
Speaker 1: ride that dog from brunch this is my thing about
Speaker 1: brunch because I didn't remember. We were not talking about Clifford. Oh, Clifford.
Speaker 1: Clifford versus Wishbone for another day. Yes, write that down.
Speaker 1: Somebody write that down, Clifford versus wish Bro What what nigga?
Speaker 1: What you now? We've been away. I'm not gonna tell
Speaker 1: the people. I'm not gonna tell the people. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: let them. I'm gonna let them hear. Yo, somebody sent
Speaker 1: me a DM with a huge list of topics, and
Speaker 1: now I can't find the DM. Oh dang, so now
Speaker 1: I gotta hunt it down. Also, some rude ass person
Speaker 1: DM me. Yo. First of all, when you're DM and
Speaker 1: people watch your fucking mouth, how about that? Watch how
Speaker 1: you fucking talk to people. If you're gonna take the
Speaker 1: time to find me on the internet to talk to
Speaker 1: me about this podcast, watch your fucking mouth. You're talking
Speaker 1: to me crazy on the phone that I pay for. Oh,
Speaker 1: you gotta take a screenshot. Whoever whoever's watching all YouTube,
Speaker 1: take a screenshot of Dulce point. They're gonna be laughing
Speaker 1: because I watch your fucking mouth. You understand. Somebody was like, well,
Speaker 1: how can you say you don't read YouTube comics comments
Speaker 1: when you know that's how you get topics for the show.
Speaker 1: You can't say that, And I'm just like, First of all, bitch,
Speaker 1: I said, I don't read too YouTube comics about my
Speaker 1: stand up. Second, I don't want I don't read the
Speaker 1: YouTube comments on the show either. That's literally somebody else's job.
Speaker 1: But I do read some of the comments. But I'm
Speaker 1: not somebody who goes to scrolls through. I'm not somebody
Speaker 1: who sits up and looks at every single comment, because
Speaker 1: in between good comments, you'll get bad comments and people
Speaker 1: are fucking mean. Yeah yeah, So for my mental health,
Speaker 1: you goofy hole. I don't read comments outcore's internet. This
Speaker 1: is another get your books up moment. Yes, get your
Speaker 1: fucking blocks up, because you're also be like, really bring
Speaker 1: a world together, Like for my mental health, you goofy hole,
Speaker 1: like geez all right, wow, have fun, you know what,
Speaker 1: you know what for my for my blood pressure, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna have to whoop your ass. It's like, wait, wait,
Speaker 1: pee on pete, get out of my internet. I mean
Speaker 1: the way that people talk to people. One, I don't
Speaker 1: need your input. You're a funk about your bigot right
Speaker 1: if you're a fan of the show, thank you so much,
Speaker 1: But to come into my dms and then just try
Speaker 1: to one check me on insalt me can. I rarely
Speaker 1: read my dms any because a lot of times I
Speaker 1: don't know where they are, and then they have so
Speaker 1: many different where who is there are different like categories
Speaker 1: of dms. Oh, I see, I see, so like people
Speaker 1: you follow, people you don't follow, and then more people
Speaker 1: you don't follow, but then there's like top requests to
Speaker 1: people you don't follow, and then all requests of people
Speaker 1: don't I'm like a not reading this. No, no, I'm
Speaker 1: with you, I'm with you. So it's like if I'm
Speaker 1: sitting that brunch enjoying stuffed French toast. Mh, I'm talking
Speaker 1: about for sixteen dollars by the way, twenty five step
Speaker 1: pussy up. Uh listen the day that you realize that
Speaker 1: you've been to pay sixteen dollars for eggs even though
Speaker 1: the eg yo, I didn't everybody was talking about the
Speaker 1: eggs and I didn't realize what was going on, And
Speaker 1: the eggs are gotten so so that the eggs are expensive.
Speaker 1: The eggs, real eggs have called up to brunch prices. Oh,
Speaker 1: so now now they got to be that expensive so
Speaker 1: that the restaurants can stay open. There was a shortage. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's a shortage. What happened to the chickens? I mean,
Speaker 1: it's a good question. I'm I'm not gonna act like
Speaker 1: I know exactly the ins. Wait a minute, So we
Speaker 1: had a wing shortage and now we got an egg shortage.
Speaker 1: Egg shortge of the moment. Oh it's bird flu. Lord,
Speaker 1: don't y'all tell my mama that bird flu is back.
Speaker 1: As someone who was an avid bruncher, I would go
Speaker 1: to this place called Marlo's Tavern in Atlanta all the time,
Speaker 1: and we, me and my home girl were literally goal
Speaker 1: like every Sunday, to the point that the people that
Speaker 1: worked there because it was like a buffet too. But
Speaker 1: what they would do, which I think was probably against
Speaker 1: some health regulation maybe, And this is also a very
Speaker 1: popular brunch spot. Um and their bottoms mimosas were uh,
Speaker 1: let's just say one day my homegirl had to drive
Speaker 1: us home from brush because your girl couldn't do it
Speaker 1: because the server kept doing the math m because it
Speaker 1: was fifteen dollars. Bottoms of selemosis, right, Bomas mimosas and
Speaker 1: he was like, listen. I was like, I had two.
Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, but that's like seven to fifty apiece.
Speaker 1: Say if you have another one, it's only five dollars
Speaker 1: a piece. And I was like, oh, he's right, okay,
Speaker 1: And I had known another one. He's like, see, not
Speaker 1: only three dollars a piece. Hey, you could get it
Speaker 1: down to one fifty he said it. And I was like, sir,
Speaker 1: I don't have it in me. I'm not drinking fifteen mimosas. First,
Speaker 1: the fucking at all. And plus he was, I was like,
Speaker 1: you could have your way with me anywhere. I gotta
Speaker 1: drink fifteen mimosas. Don't you want a fifty cent mimosa?
Speaker 1: That would be thirty you'd have to drink thirty mimosas.
Speaker 1: You'd have to be a hero. Yeah, oh yeah. Fifty
Speaker 1: cent mimosas are a possible. If you want your stomach bumps,
Speaker 1: if you don't have anything to do on Monday, go
Speaker 1: ahead and get that fifty cent mimosa. Go ahead and
Speaker 1: live your life. We're getting down to fifty cents fifth
Speaker 1: fifteen fifteen daughters bottomless. The other thing about a mimosa,
Speaker 1: it's it's most the most acidic thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: orange the champagne exactly. Yeah, that's gotta burn. It does sometimes,
Speaker 1: But that's why you need that good breakfast. That's why
Speaker 1: you need them grits. That's why you need the French toasts.
Speaker 1: The thing about happy hour, it's happy hour in most
Speaker 1: places only last two hours. I also found out in
Speaker 1: certain states happy hours illegal. I know, because it's dangerous,
Speaker 1: because it's sexy, because it's a rebel. Okay, two hours
Speaker 1: every day, honey hours clearly not every day because it's
Speaker 1: not allowed some places. There's some places that they won't
Speaker 1: even let happy hour come through because they're scared of
Speaker 1: what it'll do to the community from four to six pm.
Speaker 1: From four to six pm, they're like, hey, we can't
Speaker 1: let people have a happy hour. It's like footloose in
Speaker 1: real life. All right, if people just start dancing, what
Speaker 1: might happen? You might lose the youth? Okay. I think
Speaker 1: it's like you you worked in a restaurant, so you
Speaker 1: can use the come on geration is lost? Oh right,
Speaker 1: this too much happy hour? All right, I'm gonna tell
Speaker 1: you so. Morris Chestnut was the guest last night on
Speaker 1: the show, and I will tell you this. We don't
Speaker 1: make niggas like that, no more. We don't. We don't.
Speaker 1: We don't fucking him Michael straighthand like, we don't make
Speaker 1: black men like that. We ain't printing them out no more.
Speaker 1: We're just not. Wow, they're both in their fifties, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, come more chests. That has been fined my
Speaker 1: whole life, right, Okay, but you're like, go more chests.
Speaker 1: That's fine. You're like yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. And you
Speaker 1: see him a person, the way this nigga smelled brow,
Speaker 1: this man's cologne with a pain, you understand, Like, we
Speaker 1: don't make this dude anymore. We don't like even looking
Speaker 1: at the whole class to dude like the young black
Speaker 1: like the younger black actors. Okay, we ain't making now
Speaker 1: more more Chestnuts, right, We're not making any more Terrence
Speaker 1: Howards either. But that's neither here nor there. What I'm
Speaker 1: saying is that I just gotta let you go because
Speaker 1: I also don't know what you mean, so I'm like,
Speaker 1: we'll find it. What I'm saying is that like more
Speaker 1: chest that is like, that's the man that will take
Speaker 1: you to brunch because he wants you to have a
Speaker 1: nice Sunday. He wants to get to know you. You know,
Speaker 1: this is like, how dare you? First of all? How
Speaker 1: how how is the full dare? How dare you mean?
Speaker 1: How they're re dare me? Look, you cannot just try
Speaker 1: to attach Morris chest Nut to brunch like it's an
Speaker 1: upcoming script. Okay, you can't. Can't be like no Brunes
Speaker 1: here morsh Chestnut is attached. You can't do that, brother,
Speaker 1: That's a brunch happy hour. Happy hour is taking you
Speaker 1: to a happy place. I try to get you as
Speaker 1: drunk as possible in rush hour traffic. You understand there
Speaker 1: do you read? And rush hour traffic? You're gud. But
Speaker 1: once happy hours over, you have to take a happy
Speaker 1: ass home. No, you don't have to leave it a
Speaker 1: happy hour. Happy hours just how you start the night.
Speaker 1: You have to go home eventually, eventually if you're drunken
Speaker 1: shit at five thirty, okay, what else are you finna
Speaker 1: do that day? No? No, no, But it's not about
Speaker 1: You could say the same thing about brunch with all
Speaker 1: the mimosas. Okay, I'm chilling brunch. We chilling brunch brunch. Yeah, brunch.
Speaker 1: Br brunch was the reason that that Uber and left
Speaker 1: with nightclubs. Brunch are the reason Uber and Lyft was invented. Right.
Speaker 1: Happy hour First of all, if you notice you worked
Speaker 1: their restaurants before, right, yeah, yeah, happy hour is during
Speaker 1: that time in a restaurant where no one's there, Like
Speaker 1: a lot of restaurants were closed from like three to
Speaker 1: five happy hours at time where no one's at a restaurant,
Speaker 1: So like, hey, how do we get people in here?
Speaker 1: Would I rather have no money? Or would I'd rather
Speaker 1: sell these potato skins for seven dollars instead of fourteen? Right?
Speaker 1: All I'm saying is happy hour brings people together, so
Speaker 1: does brunch in a way that is pressureless, unlike brunch.
Speaker 1: See the drawback of brunch. The drawback of brunch is
Speaker 1: maybe you went to happy hour the night before. Maybe
Speaker 1: you did get a little too hammered. No happy hour
Speaker 1: on Saturday, Happy hours Monday, Friday delicious, But Saturday can
Speaker 1: have brunch. You can have brunch on Saturday. You gotta
Speaker 1: brunch on Saturday, but you can't have happy hour on Saturday.
Speaker 1: But you have happy hour on Friday. Right yeah, So
Speaker 1: I'm saying maybe you went hard on a happy hour
Speaker 1: and now brunch is something that's hard to make it too. Brunch,
Speaker 1: you gotta get up. You're like, you're like barely pulling
Speaker 1: yourself together. You're barely holding on until you get your
Speaker 1: food in you and everything. You're not feeling well. Nobody's
Speaker 1: like that for happy hour. Nobody goes so hard before
Speaker 1: happy hour that they can't make it to happy hour
Speaker 1: because they were at work. Exactly brunch. Sometimes there's a
Speaker 1: trial to get there. Listen, first of all, that's why
Speaker 1: I last till two, because you know your constituents, your
Speaker 1: customer base might have been up late to night before,
Speaker 1: might not have gone to bench at four in the morning.
Speaker 1: You pass out for in the morning, you get six
Speaker 1: hours to sleep. Baby girl, it's only ten a m
Speaker 1: hat and brunch lass till two. You can still get
Speaker 1: some eggs, you can still get some of that french urst.
Speaker 1: Still stick it to Amolet Your brunch is trying to
Speaker 1: drain the people's wallets dry. I'm trying to keep money
Speaker 1: in those pockets. What happens? Hey, hey, hey, hey, they
Speaker 1: have brunch specials. Why would you bottomless mimosas are the special?
Speaker 1: Why would I buy five mimosas at fifteen dollars a
Speaker 1: piece when I can pay the twenty dollars for the
Speaker 1: bottomless mimosas, and then you can tell them, a aa,
Speaker 1: let me get a little more orange juice. Let me
Speaker 1: get a little less orange juice. Let me get some
Speaker 1: granberry juice. Just give me a classic champagne Mommy's breakfast juice.
Speaker 1: What however you need to do that will adjust those
Speaker 1: mimosas for you accordingly, unless they're a bunch of cheap
Speaker 1: funcks who pre mixed their mimosas, which, let me notice,
Speaker 1: is mostly fucking orange juice. Anyway, what I'm saying is
Speaker 1: that if it's a good Sunday morning, don't nobody want
Speaker 1: to get dragged out of bed early to go get grits?
Speaker 1: Ill Oh, I don't know why people get some up
Speaker 1: so early on a Saturday. It makes me, It drives
Speaker 1: me mad. But but a good brun cheese. See this
Speaker 1: is the thing. Happy hours have a lot of tension
Speaker 1: in a happy hour, all right, because somebody just got
Speaker 1: off of work. You've been stressed out all day, and
Speaker 1: now you're bringing that tension to be released at happy
Speaker 1: hour with price cheese fries. I'm over here trying to
Speaker 1: eat my disco fries, and you over here talk about
Speaker 1: some merger that didn't through. Look here, Brian, take that
Speaker 1: pen on the water energy to the end of the
Speaker 1: fucking bar and let me enjoy my Monte Cristo in peace. Okay,
Speaker 1: So I'm fuck with Happy Hour because there's too many
Speaker 1: people getting right off of work, right off of work,
Speaker 1: and you know what happy hours meeting for people that
Speaker 1: did want to go home. You just got off of work.
Speaker 1: You don't want to go home. I wish you wouldn't
Speaker 1: have brought up too many people thing because now brunch,
Speaker 1: oh you want to talk about too many people? It's
Speaker 1: about that. What about that line? What about that line?
Speaker 1: Just down, get a reservation, get a reservation. Revations. They
Speaker 1: don't all do reservations. They don't. You even don't have
Speaker 1: to wait in a line other people who are hungry, tired, hungover. Yes, no, no,
Speaker 1: my my my place brings you no line, my break
Speaker 1: my place bringing happy hours can't have a line. If
Speaker 1: it's bumping, they might have a line. They don't definitely
Speaker 1: have a line. Places, yeah, brunch places do definitely have
Speaker 1: a line. Places yeah, if they're if they're good and
Speaker 1: don't get me wrong. I've waited in line to have
Speaker 1: a brunch place I had never had before because somebody
Speaker 1: told me how good it was, and I got in
Speaker 1: there and it was as good as they said it was.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying the line is wrong. I'm just saying
Speaker 1: if you're already a little tired from the night before,
Speaker 1: a little hungover, and then that's the other thing too.
Speaker 1: Some of these places have a line so long that
Speaker 1: you end up really being pressed. Like it's like, all right,
Speaker 1: we're about to get in at one fifty five, So
Speaker 1: I hope everybody knows what they want at the table
Speaker 1: because we need to order as soon as we sit down,
Speaker 1: because some of these places are strict and what I
Speaker 1: don't like. I was in the airport the other day
Speaker 1: trying to get breakfast and I just wanted to croissant,
Speaker 1: just to check whatever croissant cheese and whatever on it.
Speaker 1: And the guy was like, oh, oh, we're not really
Speaker 1: doing breakfast anymore. I said, what is it ten forty?
Speaker 1: He said it's ten thirty five five, and I walked
Speaker 1: the funk away. I just didn't eat. I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm not going to I'm not gonna have your early hamburger. Also,
Speaker 1: I'm looking at the fucking croissants. Yeah it's ten. If
Speaker 1: it was ten fifty five, I can give you that
Speaker 1: ten thirty five. Did the sausage just turn off? Did
Speaker 1: the sausage decided to stop being sausage? Right? Did the
Speaker 1: sausage just become a honey baked tam? Like? What the
Speaker 1: fuck are you talking about? So I think there should
Speaker 1: always be like a five, I mean five to ten
Speaker 1: in a gray spirit and some shit like that, but
Speaker 1: the whole like, oh it's ten, it's ten. So my
Speaker 1: question is like, so when you stop serving breakfast ten
Speaker 1: thirty one or was it ten twenty nine? Why do
Speaker 1: we ten? Oh? That's my favorite when somebody when somebody
Speaker 1: pulls that, I want to lose my mind because if
Speaker 1: I'm already there, Like let's say, if I'm just walking in,
Speaker 1: I have no rights. Okay, I'll give that up. I've
Speaker 1: worked in a restaurant. I know It's like if I
Speaker 1: walk in at ten thirty one and I want to
Speaker 1: sit down, get my waters, get myself situated, and then
Speaker 1: order a whole breakfast, and y'all stop doing breakfast at
Speaker 1: ten thirty, then I'm with you. I'm fully with you.
Speaker 1: I don't even try it. I don't even try to push.
Speaker 1: My thing is if I walk in at ten twenty eight,
Speaker 1: tell me hey, because I never wants to go Listen,
Speaker 1: did you come here for breakfast? Because breakfast is about
Speaker 1: to end and I've had places get us served breakfast
Speaker 1: even though breakfast had ended, because we were still they
Speaker 1: let me know, or because you were still you were
Speaker 1: in the line still breakfast In's at brunch In's at two,
Speaker 1: we had a very long wait, longer than we anticipated.
Speaker 1: You waited for like an hour, and now it's one
Speaker 1: fifty five. When you're sitting down, we won't honor the breakfast,
Speaker 1: or it's to something you've been in line for an hour.
Speaker 1: But it was anybody who got in line after two
Speaker 1: o'clock could not get breakfast. And they were like, hey,
Speaker 1: it's after two. This is the last batch of people.
Speaker 1: We're not doing any more about it, and we're not
Speaker 1: doing anybody else for breakfast. That I can respect. Everybody
Speaker 1: that was in this line waiting, Okay, allie, I'll get breakfast.
Speaker 1: No new people. We're not doing this that I can respect.
Speaker 1: Happy hours, I've been happy. Hey, happy hour ends at six,
Speaker 1: coming here at five fifty five. Be prepared, know what
Speaker 1: you want to drink now, right, and be prepared, and
Speaker 1: I get these half price chicken fingers. That's all your baby, girls.
Speaker 1: If I know when breakfast ends, and then I get
Speaker 1: there and have the time to get there, sit down,
Speaker 1: get served water, everything before breakfast is ended. And so
Speaker 1: I'm still like within five ten minutes before breakfast ends.
Speaker 1: And you tell me there's no more breakfast, I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: then there was never breakfast here, because now if it
Speaker 1: stops at ten thirty, I showed up at ten and
Speaker 1: then the time you're ready to take my order, it
Speaker 1: was like ten ten and you're like, oh, we stopped
Speaker 1: doing breakfast. It's like, okay, is this also a gas station?
Speaker 1: Like like, help me out here. I do think it's
Speaker 1: very interesting that people can pick and choose. It's like, well,
Speaker 1: you know, we start serving breakfast at ten thirty, and
Speaker 1: I was like, but it's ten o'clock now. Well, but
Speaker 1: by the time your food is ready, then I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm ordering at ten. You're telling me the pancake batter
Speaker 1: just throws itself out at ten twenty nine. The thing
Speaker 1: that ends up happening though, and I've since I've been
Speaker 1: at restaurants before, I can. I can genuinely say there
Speaker 1: will be things that take the one. There are some
Speaker 1: dishes where I'm like, oh, okay, I can I can
Speaker 1: see how this is over because there was like a
Speaker 1: dish that it took a while to cook because they
Speaker 1: did the whole they would do like pans of it
Speaker 1: at a time. Yeah, and so it's like, okay, that
Speaker 1: takes twenty minutes to cook. So it's gonna be just
Speaker 1: barely past breakfast by the time we served. What time
Speaker 1: did you start cooking it? Oh? But they ran out,
Speaker 1: that's the thing. So it'll be like it'll be ten
Speaker 1: twenty and they're like, we're done with breakfast at ten thirty.
Speaker 1: So at ten twenty, I'm like, oh yeah, let me
Speaker 1: get this whole breakfast casserole thing you guys are talking about.
Speaker 1: You seem so famous for, right, And they're like, ooh,
Speaker 1: that actually takes twenty minutes to make, and if and
Speaker 1: if we make one for you, that's fine. We sold one,
Speaker 1: but now the other eight people that it can feed
Speaker 1: won't know to order it, so it's just gonna go
Speaker 1: to waste. I'm like, it's not just tell those people
Speaker 1: they can order it. I worked to restaurants before, and
Speaker 1: I'm just like there's a lot of things that happened.
Speaker 1: Like I'll be at a restaurant they're like, I'm like, hey,
Speaker 1: can I get this, and they'll go, actually, we don't.
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm gonna stop you right there. I
Speaker 1: hear you. Is this pre made? Well, No, we don't
Speaker 1: really do substitutions. I'm just asking you to give me
Speaker 1: different cheese. It's it's hard to when a place doesn't
Speaker 1: do substitutions if they are not doing them because they
Speaker 1: don't know how to do anything better, or if they're
Speaker 1: not doing them because they're that like persnickety about it.
Speaker 1: Some places are just persnikity, which makes me feel like
Speaker 1: that you pre make everything if you're that person, Like, oh,
Speaker 1: I can't because like one of my friends she has
Speaker 1: a joke about, like Daniel pereg she has a joke
Speaker 1: about like being at brunch and just starting it with
Speaker 1: like is it possible? Yeah, that's out. She'll start everything.
Speaker 1: But it's like I'm changing in order. It's guys, I'm
Speaker 1: getting tomatoes taken off of something, I'm getting croutons taken
Speaker 1: out of something. I'm getting avocado taken off of something.
Speaker 1: For the most part, I'll eat this, however you may
Speaker 1: ain't it, but don't look me in my face and
Speaker 1: at telling me it looked like I'm just some type
Speaker 1: of asshole, because I'm like, yo, can I just not
Speaker 1: get tomatoes and crutons in this salad? And sometimes avocado
Speaker 1: makes me sick? So can I not get these people? Well? Actually, also,
Speaker 1: I don't like it when anybody who works at a
Speaker 1: job acts like it's there, it's their establishment. Oh that
Speaker 1: you're bothering them at their house. You're bothering them at
Speaker 1: their house. Yeah. If I didn't come in here, you
Speaker 1: can't pay your rent, So I don't understand why you're
Speaker 1: getting an attitude with me. And I've worked at a
Speaker 1: server before. Yeah, the people like, oh you think that way,
Speaker 1: because it's like. What I don't like is when people
Speaker 1: fit treat I know how to treat wade staff because
Speaker 1: I've been a waiter before. I've been a server before.
Speaker 1: So when I get somebody who if I see you
Speaker 1: split a check three ways at another table, don't come
Speaker 1: over and tell me you can't split a fucking checkm Okay,
Speaker 1: I just saw you split the check at that table.
Speaker 1: Do you don't want to split a check because you
Speaker 1: don't want to take three black people's credit cards? What
Speaker 1: the fuck is happening in here. There's a lot of
Speaker 1: times I've been arresting. I'm like, I know, I just
Speaker 1: saw you split the check. Or people be like, oh, no,
Speaker 1: we can do it. No, he can do it. I
Speaker 1: don't understand why we don't want to ask people to
Speaker 1: do that job. No more. Yeah, people are very timid
Speaker 1: around the idea of like, no, you need to do this,
Speaker 1: this is like really important. I'm an American. I can't
Speaker 1: do this. Man. Also, when we started, they were like,
Speaker 1: you want to separate checks? And you go yes. Your
Speaker 1: friend's like no, and I said, yes, well he don't
Speaker 1: want him to do that much work. Why the fuck not,
Speaker 1: He's not doing any work. It's the computer. It's why
Speaker 1: we have computers. So when you get the restaurant, they're like,
Speaker 1: we don't split checks. Oh, you don't want to make
Speaker 1: no money because if you don't split a check, you
Speaker 1: just created a problem for me. I mean, I'll throw
Speaker 1: this out there right now. This seems like a brunch problem.
Speaker 1: I feel like half the hour, no it's the restaurant. No,
Speaker 1: it was a restaurant problem. And you like a happy hour,
Speaker 1: you don't have the same issues. You don't feel like
Speaker 1: more than one person at a time goes to happy hour. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: I just mean that at happy hour it's like every
Speaker 1: people don't keep split checks. Splitting a check is splitting
Speaker 1: a check. You see people split a check and fucking Applebee's.
Speaker 1: That's not expensive. Sometimes people let you know who they
Speaker 1: are and you can't act surprise later. You know. Sometimes
Speaker 1: people tell you, hey, I'm the brunch type person. I
Speaker 1: need to be taken out, wined and dined in the
Speaker 1: early parts of the afternoon. And then there's some people
Speaker 1: who are like, hey, I'm over here at happy hour
Speaker 1: trying to get in as much as I can off
Speaker 1: of the man, all right, because as soon as it
Speaker 1: turns six o one, you know, the happiness is shutting down.
Speaker 1: We're going full price on all the chicken wings. Let
Speaker 1: me take advantage of them before they can take advantage
Speaker 1: of me. That's you know, well, let's let's let's let's
Speaker 1: kick it to the listeners, because I I feel like
Speaker 1: neither one of us it's really budged. And maybe we
Speaker 1: didn't defend that. Well, no, our positions because you know
Speaker 1: what brunch is boogie right, But happy hour ain't for
Speaker 1: the poor either, It's not fully Yeah, there are some
Speaker 1: I've Here's the thing. Happy hour has the same vibes
Speaker 1: as try and get into a club before a certain time,
Speaker 1: because that's when the cover charges. Yes, yes, yes, okay, okay, okay, okay,
Speaker 1: that's I can admit that wholeheartedly. I'm lucky enough to
Speaker 1: be at a point in my life where sometimes I'm
Speaker 1: there for the Happy hour? Am you know what's happen hour?
Speaker 1: I just felt like eating there. You know that's true
Speaker 1: because a lot of times you're on the road, look
Speaker 1: at God, you're just like all right, well I just
Speaker 1: flew in and it's four o'clock. Yeah my show. You
Speaker 1: get the closest place, Yeah, the closest place. What is
Speaker 1: the ruby Tuesdays? I honestly, I'm a kind of the nineties.
Speaker 1: I enjoy a salad bar. I just fucking do we
Speaker 1: don't tucked up? Hmm? Well, listen, listeners, I want to know,
Speaker 1: are you bad at bougie or sincere you? Are you
Speaker 1: pinching pennies? Are you bad at bougie. Are you bad
Speaker 1: at bougie or are you Josh? It's really where a
Speaker 1: sensible I want to think out to listen in another
Speaker 1: episode of Hold Up. Uh, what I've expected you to
Speaker 1: do this week is, you know, stipe your books up
Speaker 1: all right? You can get kindle on your phone. You
Speaker 1: will be out here being literally you don't have to
Speaker 1: be looking at TikTok all day long unless you're watching them. Uh.
Speaker 1: Then people make stuff when and that's that's cool. But otherwise, yeah,
Speaker 1: put it on phone, put a kind on our path.
Speaker 1: Read a book, okay, learn the classics, all right, learn
Speaker 1: a word today. You know you're worried. Everybody's worried for today, strumpet.
Speaker 1: Look up, y'all, please read take care of yourselves. And
Speaker 1: if you're looking at catch up with us, you can
Speaker 1: find Duel Say Sloan at Duel Say Sloan on Everything.
Speaker 1: And if you're looking at catch up with me, you
Speaker 1: can find me at my other podcasts at Josh Johnson
Speaker 1: Show wherever you get your podcasts. We love you, we
Speaker 1: appreciate you, and have a safe, happy, healthy and booshee weekend.
Speaker 1: Get they behind me, Satan. This has been hold up
Speaker 1: We've covered conscious wrap versus club bangers, barsop versus body wash,
Speaker 1: diners versus waffle houses, all sorts of things. What else
Speaker 1: should we be talking about? We want to know from you.
Speaker 1: Let us know, drop us a comment, or hit hold
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