Speaker 1: Okay. My mom texted me yesterday around the time when
Speaker 1: I'm getting off work, and she said, Gila opened my wallet,
Speaker 1: took out my plastic sleeve with picks, then my COVID
Speaker 1: inoculation card, voting card, et cetera, left them all under
Speaker 1: the table. She may have unzipped it, and after removing
Speaker 1: it from my purse. Who knows? I was like, who knows?
Speaker 1: Gila is a cat? She's like, she's my mom's cat.
Speaker 1: I named her after a beach House song. But it's
Speaker 1: the cat at my mom's house. I did all this,
Speaker 1: and I said, are you sure you didn't just misplace them?
Speaker 1: That seems like a lot for a cat to do.
Speaker 1: And she said she likes the table. Things on the
Speaker 1: table are fair game. Guila has skills.
Speaker 2: I love your mom, Janey, Oh my god, Gila has skills.
Speaker 3: Baby.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: No, no, she's the kind of person that like she
Speaker 1: she will one like do something wrong and then the
Speaker 1: cat yeah, and then be like, I can't believe the
Speaker 1: cat would do that.
Speaker 2: You know, we need a we need a term. Do
Speaker 2: they have a term for female cats like they do
Speaker 2: for female dogs?
Speaker 1: Ah? Maybe maybe something like scientific maybe cunt was Yeah,
Speaker 1: the original that's county.
Speaker 2: That's county County. I like, well, welcome to another deranged
Speaker 2: episode of Beauty translated. This one is a particular wait
Speaker 2: way queen Aura Molly, that is fierce Producer Jess is
Speaker 2: telling us that the name for a female cat is
Speaker 2: not a bitch, but in fact a queen or a molly,
Speaker 2: which you know what, I think dogs got the short
Speaker 2: end of the stick there, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're the bitches.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're the bitches.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Did you know that a baby shrimp is called a shit?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: It's not, is it really?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: I believed you? Oh my god, I want to see
Speaker 2: that in the next David Attenborough documentary.
Speaker 1: Is talking about a shits of shrimps.
Speaker 2: And here we have a pile of shit.
Speaker 1: A bunch of shit, shits of shrimp so hatching for
Speaker 1: the springtime.
Speaker 2: Well, Jennie, what the fuck are we talking about today?
Speaker 2: And the fuck are we talking to?
Speaker 1: So today on the show we have our good friends
Speaker 1: and quite literal homies from the Eighth Ship Show, Mars
Speaker 1: Ivy and Shogi to tell us all about homeism, what
Speaker 1: it means, why it's good, why you should be a
Speaker 1: homie too, and why more than likely you probably already
Speaker 1: are one if you're listening to this show. So if
Speaker 1: my memory serves me correctly, some time around, I want
Speaker 1: to say twenty twenty one, when I had first moved
Speaker 1: out to the city I made, I had like one
Speaker 1: trans friend irl.
Speaker 2: Yeah it wasn't me, because I said.
Speaker 1: It was not you. Yeah, it was not you because
Speaker 1: you were too You were too HSTS. I was too.
Speaker 1: I was to AGP, so we could never find love.
Speaker 2: You're blurring the lines between HSTS and AGP.
Speaker 1: Then, I'm gonna be honest, I don't really know which
Speaker 1: ones which sometimes.
Speaker 2: Either listen, there's two types of women in this world.
Speaker 1: Yees, bitches and shits. I'm not really sure which. When
Speaker 1: you throw in acronyms, it's like this, too many letters.
Speaker 1: I don't know this could mean anything.
Speaker 2: Uh yeah, I love what they actually mean though it's
Speaker 2: actually pretty just great. On Blanchard, you know, let it
Speaker 2: be known that we don't actually love Blanchard on the
Speaker 2: pod or believe anything that he says. But he is
Speaker 2: still alive and has a very funny Twitter if you
Speaker 2: want to, if you want to troll him on.
Speaker 1: Twitter, yeah, let's get him on the show.
Speaker 2: We should actually speaking of then he can determine which
Speaker 2: of us is HSTS and which of us is agp oh.
Speaker 1: I think he can figure it out pretty easily. But
Speaker 1: I chatted with these guys all the time. I was
Speaker 1: on several episodes of their podcast, The Ain't Shit Show,
Speaker 1: and they're great and they're a great collective of multi racial,
Speaker 1: multi gender, multi diverse gay people, trans people, whatever. So
Speaker 1: that's why you're about to hear us talk about gay
Speaker 1: eminem songs for probably the next hour and tell like
Speaker 1: harrowing tales from Craigslist meet up casual encounters.
Speaker 2: Baby, get ready for some casual encounter stories.
Speaker 1: This is related to uh Our Our Our Show's mission
Speaker 1: statement of interviewing you know, important, yeah, uncompromising voices in
Speaker 1: the trans queer community.
Speaker 5: Or allies at large.
Speaker 1: And I really can't think of a better ally than
Speaker 1: the philosophical trailblazers that are Marcos, Ivy and Shaggy and
Speaker 1: what they provide to the table with the homie, the
Speaker 1: homie mindset and the homie Manifesto, which we will also
Speaker 1: link in the description. Thank you guys for joining us
Speaker 1: on another beautiful episode of Beauty Translated, where this time
Speaker 1: we really do look at all of the beauty that
Speaker 1: is in the world.
Speaker 2: Oh baby, there's some beauty. Get your popcorn and your butter,
Speaker 2: because we got stories to tell.
Speaker 1: When we went on on You Guys Show, I know,
Speaker 1: we talked a little about how, you know, we're professionals.
Speaker 1: We're sponsored by iHeartMedia, So unlike on all the other
Speaker 1: podcasts where we you know, say people's first last name
Speaker 1: to address and where they were.
Speaker 5: Not going to do that, we're not going to favorite.
Speaker 1: But before before we can really get the show on
Speaker 1: the road, get cooking.
Speaker 5: Thank you guys for being here.
Speaker 1: You guys are the Ain't Ship Show podcast, legendary Internet
Speaker 1: friends of mine, uh Me and Marcos and Ivy and
Speaker 1: Shocky go way back back to when I was living
Speaker 1: in like the shittiest house of my life and Decatur
Speaker 1: recording awesome stuff, a lot of funny stuff. If the
Speaker 1: listeners of the show I think I'm funny, they should
Speaker 1: go back and listen to all of my appearances on there.
Speaker 1: There's some very unhinged shit there that I think you
Speaker 1: guys would.
Speaker 4: Janie recorded some of the best voicemails we've ever gotten
Speaker 4: on the podcast Unhinged Deranged Things, I'm gonna be honest, I.
Speaker 1: Don't even fucking remember that.
Speaker 5: Remember a Trucker Janey was a legendary voice.
Speaker 2: Wow, I want to can we try to bring her back?
Speaker 7: I'll send it to you.
Speaker 8: It's yeah, it's you if you wing into the phone
Speaker 8: and being like, I don't want to Trugger can't be pregnant.
Speaker 7: It was crazy.
Speaker 4: It goes on for like three minutes.
Speaker 7: It's art house cinema as well.
Speaker 1: I love you, guys, Thanks for being on the show.
Speaker 1: Do you guys want to maybe thanks for half of course,
Speaker 1: of course, real pleasure.
Speaker 6: For us show to be here.
Speaker 1: A epic anime crossover moment. Do you guys maybe want
Speaker 1: to introduce yourself? Tell us a little what you do,
Speaker 1: what you're about, homies, Marcos, you're kind of the some
Speaker 1: of the Powerpuff Girls here.
Speaker 7: I don't want to be Blossom. I want to be Mojo.
Speaker 7: JoJo's freaking well.
Speaker 1: Now you're him, so yeah, that's I'm.
Speaker 7: Okay with being him too. No, so, yeah, he was
Speaker 7: the the first.
Speaker 1: Like real vem b on on my evil evil Yeah
Speaker 1: I loved it.
Speaker 7: But anyways, okay. I started the Ancient show in twenty
Speaker 7: seventeen with a friend of mine, Ruben, who's not here.
Speaker 7: He's like he's he's a regular human being. So he
Speaker 7: does he has like regular human stuff.
Speaker 9: You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: He's got like a job, and he's like normal and
Speaker 1: people like him and respect him in the community, so
Speaker 1: you know.
Speaker 7: What I'm saying. Like, so he's hardly around. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 7: he's He's the He's literally the face of the podcast.
Speaker 7: We needed a man that when the when the ship
Speaker 7: goes bad, we like, right, So I started this podcast
Speaker 7: with him, and Shogy came on board. Shogy brought Ivy,
Speaker 7: Me and Ivy hit it off.
Speaker 5: Ivy make sure I got a.
Speaker 6: Place wherever I go that I can set my Ivy down.
Speaker 7: That makes Shocky bubbles.
Speaker 5: No, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I was gonna say Shoggy, Yeah, no, Shoggy his bubbles
Speaker 1: and Ivy.
Speaker 5: And then yeah, I ever watched the power Puff That's.
Speaker 6: Right, foundational text, no idea.
Speaker 4: These references you guys are pulling right, absolutely.
Speaker 1: Get you kind of are holy ship.
Speaker 7: Yeah you are kind of missbellowed with the red hair.
Speaker 7: You just need curls and that's it.
Speaker 10: Yeah, cod oh no, because look, folks, do you know
Speaker 10: anything about the lore of our extremely successful podcast.
Speaker 6: We've kind of got problems.
Speaker 4: We have we have an existing thought against.
Speaker 7: So Jannie, when you texted me earlier today about like
Speaker 7: because I missed the deadline for like when to show up.
Speaker 1: No, it was my fault. I don't know how time works.
Speaker 1: This is this is all been a very recurring.
Speaker 6: Detective season one and you still don't know how.
Speaker 7: I know it's a flat circle, but.
Speaker 1: A whole is a.
Speaker 5: Flat gay true detective. A flat circle.
Speaker 1: Again what Harrold said, like.
Speaker 6: You should suck yourself off.
Speaker 7: Anyways, when you texted me, I was at City Hall,
Speaker 7: Like I'm literally, I'm in a current beef with the
Speaker 7: water company and I have like a little duplex situation
Speaker 7: and they turn the water off water off in the
Speaker 7: back duplex because they process the payment and the payment
Speaker 7: failed on their end, and so now they're like they're
Speaker 7: not so they're not returning me that money. They're not
Speaker 7: giving me that money back. Well, it's in our it's not.
Speaker 1: The mayor is on a pedophile sex plane right now
Speaker 1: and he's got everyone's water right now.
Speaker 7: Yeah, So I'm like literally, and I got to the
Speaker 7: point where like I wrote an email and I sent
Speaker 7: it in there. But I like, I'm like, this is
Speaker 7: a threat. I'm sending you an email to the news
Speaker 7: about how you're stealing, Like this is stealing dog, you
Speaker 7: know I feel about and I'm about to snitch you
Speaker 7: out right this well, I feel like I cannot call
Speaker 7: the cops on you.
Speaker 5: The cops is laying. But snitching to journalists.
Speaker 4: Immediately got a little bit of slag to It's kind
Speaker 4: of snitching to journalist is extremely funny because like people
Speaker 4: that have power like normally control the cops.
Speaker 5: Or whatever, and they control the media too, and the
Speaker 5: well to some extent.
Speaker 4: Yes, but there's like a really funny thing that happens
Speaker 4: when you hit like a certain level of power. Is
Speaker 4: like once you hit that certain level of power, you
Speaker 4: start like craving people's respect, which you can't buy to
Speaker 4: only get that if you're like a good person. And
Speaker 4: if somebody puts an article out there that's like this
Speaker 4: guy stinks so mad. I mean, it's it's one of
Speaker 4: the most powerful things you can do outside of illegal crimes.
Speaker 1: I mean, Musk is a classic example of that. He
Speaker 1: was someone that like when he wasn't in the public eye,
Speaker 1: people are like, oh, he's a smart billionaire, playboy philanthropist.
Speaker 5: And now that he's like getting.
Speaker 4: In public and everybody's like, look at this fat slub
Speaker 4: of a looser, divorced guy.
Speaker 1: Ever, what's his he really does.
Speaker 11: Like pull on like that whole like you know, betters,
Speaker 11: like better to keep your mouth shut and be thought
Speaker 11: a fool than to open it and remove all.
Speaker 5: That something like that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that sounds like something, Carmen, You're fucking like Redeck.
Speaker 1: Grandma would have a very cool.
Speaker 3: Idiom for.
Speaker 2: Ship fire and same match.
Speaker 1: Yeah, laid.
Speaker 6: A pig, lay down with the pig and get I
Speaker 6: don't know these Yeah.
Speaker 3: Better.
Speaker 1: It's better to eat Christmas ham than have sex with
Speaker 1: an animal.
Speaker 5: That's what my dad all.
Speaker 7: My mean while used to say. It's better to uh
Speaker 7: come a shipload.
Speaker 9: Than times for times but not all pee times for.
Speaker 7: We didn't even get through the intros. By the way,
Speaker 7: I'm shocking.
Speaker 6: You can find me on the internet. I created Cereal Experiments.
Speaker 1: And Ivy you're like the producer, right, you're the brains
Speaker 1: I for a for a.
Speaker 4: While, yes, and I'm trying to be again. But Marcos
Speaker 4: never sends me any of the files to help him,
Speaker 4: like deal with hell.
Speaker 7: What it is? Myself out and I'm like, who could
Speaker 7: do this for me? And then I was like, I'm
Speaker 7: right here, I'm.
Speaker 1: Right here, dog, I got.
Speaker 3: Time.
Speaker 1: Well, we love you guys, and we appreciate you guys
Speaker 1: for coming. I wanted to have you guys on to
Speaker 1: introduce to our audience, uh, the lovely philosophical concept of
Speaker 1: homyism and could you maybe just give us a brief
Speaker 1: summation of the homie society, the homie collective, and the
Speaker 1: homie mind thot.
Speaker 7: So it's weird, right, you don't want us, you don't
Speaker 7: want a homie regime.
Speaker 1: You don't want that.
Speaker 7: No, right, it's the only ideology where like, if we
Speaker 7: get into power in any way, shape or form.
Speaker 1: It's going to be bad.
Speaker 5: It's all right, Yeah, I love a homie regime.
Speaker 4: No, because I'm enacting punitive judgments against my enemies.
Speaker 7: You give me homie regime and I'm bringing back the
Speaker 7: mongol hoarde, but I'm making it Mexican. It's not it's
Speaker 7: going to be bad.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be the Mandela.
Speaker 6: Ud. Let's not lean off.
Speaker 11: Are explaining our ideas by like, first of all, if
Speaker 11: we ever get power, millions will die, die, will die.
Speaker 7: Because we're not doing We're not anyways. The idea is
Speaker 7: radical militant friendship, right, and so like that's that's what
Speaker 7: it boils down to. And a lot of people don't
Speaker 7: understand the concept of like being radically friendly, right, like
Speaker 7: being like militantly friendly, because it's a it's a weird concept.
Speaker 7: But the idea is that when you meet people in
Speaker 7: the world and your friends and you're being nice and friendly,
Speaker 7: that's cool and whatever. But every now and then you'll
Speaker 7: run across people who don't like you, who actively hate you,
Speaker 7: who think that.
Speaker 1: You're run across the way more than you'd expect.
Speaker 7: Yeah, and my answer to those people is, I'm gonna
Speaker 7: especially be your friend. I'm a specially I'm now in
Speaker 7: your life. We're now you, We're you're making I'm making
Speaker 7: me a problem and your hate is gonna fucking have
Speaker 7: to come around to me because I'm not moving, right.
Speaker 7: It's it's a it's a it's an ideology for stubborn people,
Speaker 7: for incredibly stubborn.
Speaker 2: People and persistent people, I guess.
Speaker 1: And yeah, also if I'm if I'm not mistaken, part
Speaker 1: of this is that everyone's Mexican.
Speaker 7: Everyone is Mexican. Baseline for humanity is Mexican. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 7: the okay, so it's it's a joke, but it's not.
Speaker 6: A joke our complicated racial ideology.
Speaker 7: The problem is is that in America, right, race doesn't
Speaker 7: mean your skin color. Race is like you're aesthetic almost,
Speaker 7: It's like a signifier or a complicitness with a specific
Speaker 7: type of culture.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's hard to ali London has entered the child.
Speaker 1: It's hard to explain that.
Speaker 7: But like it's easier to understand for non for non black,
Speaker 7: for like non black and brown people in America, to
Speaker 7: the extent of like black people in America definitely are
Speaker 7: outside of the realm of whiteness until they get a
Speaker 7: specific amount of money and then you.
Speaker 1: Can buy your way into whiteness. Alla Kanye West, right, Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 11: More like this more just a little simply to the point,
Speaker 11: I think probably a more effective way to neutralize the
Speaker 11: dismount of whiteness.
Speaker 6: Than you know, reminding everybody how wife they are. Just
Speaker 6: tell them their Mexican.
Speaker 7: Now allow allow them Mexicans, allow their country into being Mexican. Right,
Speaker 7: because not problem because because in America, being Mexican, especially
Speaker 7: being Mexican American like really does occupy this weird liminal
Speaker 7: racial space where you don't have like you're not You're
Speaker 7: not like you're never gonna when what is the Oppression
Speaker 7: Olympics with anyone? But no one wins that. But you're
Speaker 7: definitely not winning that as a Mexican person. But on
Speaker 7: top of that, you're also kind of like outside the
Speaker 7: realm of whiteness because no one is going to ever
Speaker 7: fucking identify and it will come up. You will eventually
Speaker 7: get you won't get the jobs you want, you won't
Speaker 7: get the things that you want. You're gonna have to
Speaker 7: work twice as hard, and you won't really have a
Speaker 7: reason as to why other than just like just there
Speaker 7: are cultural signifiers that make you different from us. And
Speaker 7: the beautiful thing about Mexican American culture in America is
Speaker 7: that Mexican American culture in America does not have a
Speaker 7: single source or origin point, and we all do one
Speaker 7: specific thing. There's so many different ways to express it, right.
Speaker 7: There's not like just like, oh, you only listen to
Speaker 7: this type of music or you only dress in a
Speaker 7: certain type of way. Fools come in every shape and size,
Speaker 7: you know what I'm saying, And that's the beautiful thing
Speaker 7: about it is that it's already there. You just have
Speaker 7: to open up the space for people who feel alienated
Speaker 7: by a culture or society that doesn't want them in there.
Speaker 1: Well forgive me for like explaining like intro to like
Speaker 1: racial politics stuff, but like whiteness isn't even like real,
Speaker 1: you know, like Benjamin Franklin would say like that Germans
Speaker 1: are like not white.
Speaker 7: The guy who understands whiteness is is HP Lovecraft. He's
Speaker 7: the only guy who could say that he's white, you
Speaker 7: know what I'm saying. He's the one.
Speaker 1: You gotta you gotta respect a man that was like
Speaker 1: so racist he saw other racist as like incomprehensible cosmic.
Speaker 7: Beings like that's you could possibly do Like that is.
Speaker 1: That is a level of whiteness like hitherto unknown to
Speaker 1: like wouldn't even bother.
Speaker 6: Being racist anymore. HP Lovecraft did it better than you're
Speaker 6: going to find something.
Speaker 1: New true true?
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, HP Lovecraft tour. He left no crows, he
Speaker 5: left no racism crime.
Speaker 6: It's like a it's like a pac Man or one
Speaker 6: of those games that's essentially solved.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's been solved.
Speaker 7: And but I mean that plays into that plays a
Speaker 7: lot into like the idea of radical friendship, because there
Speaker 7: are people in this world who will hate you, and
Speaker 7: they don't even know why they hate you, have no
Speaker 7: real reason other than like an ideological one, and the
Speaker 7: only way you can come combat that in an effective
Speaker 7: and safe manner is by being friendly. And I know
Speaker 7: that sounds crazy when someone's like, especially on the internet
Speaker 7: where where the Internet is this weird like space where
Speaker 7: people can send death threats to you daily and they
Speaker 7: just yeah, you can post like I love cookies, and
Speaker 7: then someone will like share a picture of your house.
Speaker 4: Fucking like saw a stack of fucking pizza boxes out.
Speaker 4: I had her like college kid neighbor's house. Was like, damn,
Speaker 4: I know exactly what the fuck these guys are doing.
Speaker 4: I know they don't have dishes. I'm going to bring
Speaker 4: them real food. I'm gonna be a good neighbor. And
Speaker 4: then just like people threatening her pets me, we're going
Speaker 4: to eat her pig.
Speaker 11: Yeah, it was the whole thing, Like I want to
Speaker 11: say a year and a half ago, but it was
Speaker 11: probably like three months.
Speaker 1: No, I think it was like I think that was
Speaker 1: like last year. Yeah, I remember the Chili. That was
Speaker 1: five years ago, Like, wake up, you see.
Speaker 6: Your experiments Land, which should because I get royalties.
Speaker 1: Trust me, our fans have seen Serial Experiments laying like.
Speaker 1: I don't think that reference is going to be lost
Speaker 1: on our listener, show.
Speaker 7: Me the Creator.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know if the people listening to this
Speaker 1: transgender podcast have heard of Evan Gellian but.
Speaker 2: On Genesis in.
Speaker 5: What was your point about the Serial Experiments? Oh, just
Speaker 5: on the Internet, Yes, yeah, in the show The Wired.
Speaker 5: I think the price of the brick going up.
Speaker 1: So I find that interesting because I agree, like, I mean, obviously,
Speaker 1: uh Me and Carmen are white and do not experience
Speaker 1: the runt, the brunt of like racial brutality that comes
Speaker 1: with being a person of color in America or in
Speaker 1: the world at large. But I mean, we can obviously
Speaker 1: understand like discrimination from the point of being too loudmouth
Speaker 1: trainnies on the internet.
Speaker 5: On the Internet, that's and in real life.
Speaker 1: I don't necessarily agree with like like respectability politics. I
Speaker 1: don't know, I've told this story probably before, but like
Speaker 1: when I was like you and I like before I
Speaker 1: came out as trans, like, I think that's fairly common
Speaker 1: for a lot of trans people to maybe have like
Speaker 1: some biases like before they come out, because you know,
Speaker 1: it's you grow up in fucking America.
Speaker 2: Like so you saw me in school and you were
Speaker 2: like that, yeah, I was like ugly like that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but yeah, I remember when I was a big
Speaker 1: fan and still am of their early stuff, the band
Speaker 1: Against Me. And when Laura Jane Grace came out as trans,
Speaker 1: that was like the first time that I was like,
Speaker 1: hold the fuck on a second, like this isn't a joke,
Speaker 1: Like I like this person and I appreciate what they
Speaker 1: do and I want to like understand. That was like
Speaker 1: the first time I wanted to kind of like understand
Speaker 1: what was going on there. And I feel like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's fairly common for a lot of people, like when
Speaker 1: they have some sort of bias, but then they encounter
Speaker 1: like someone that they like respect, whether it's like an
Speaker 1: artist or like an athlete or something thing and they're like, Okay,
Speaker 1: well now I'm conflicted between like my internal biases that
Speaker 1: I have that I don't really have any like reason
Speaker 1: for having other than just like growing up in America,
Speaker 1: versus the like respect and admiration that I have for
Speaker 1: this person and I feel like I wouldn't necessarily endorse
Speaker 1: like respectability politics because I don't like blame trans people
Speaker 1: or people of color for you know, their own discrimination.
Speaker 1: But I do think that there is like a certain
Speaker 1: level of like seeing someone carry themselves a way that
Speaker 1: like you've never seen before, and then like that kind
Speaker 1: of like opens you up to being like, Okay, well
Speaker 1: maybe I should confront this, Like internal biases that I
Speaker 1: have is that maybe kind of am I getting at something?
Speaker 7: Homism is anti respectability politics in the sense that like
Speaker 7: we're not.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we don't respect you guys at all.
Speaker 11: It's kind of fucked up that we kind of equate
Speaker 11: respectability politics to not being.
Speaker 1: A true problem that I agree. I agree, and I
Speaker 1: do think that is something that I've seen a lot
Speaker 1: of people on Twitter, like you're being fucking off, putting
Speaker 1: and annoying, and then some like the most feral tranny
Speaker 1: of all time will be like what are you just
Speaker 1: telling me to do respectability politics?
Speaker 5: It's like, no, but may.
Speaker 1: Calm down just like a tiny but But at the
Speaker 1: same time, I understand where that feral tranny is coming from,
Speaker 1: you know, like like I understand why marginalized people like
Speaker 1: are fucking fed up with it.
Speaker 5: And I understand like why that they.
Speaker 1: Wouldn't want to engage in any anything that resembles like
Speaker 1: respectability politics.
Speaker 5: Amusing.
Speaker 7: Well, that's so, this is what I mean by like
Speaker 7: radical friendship, right, Like this is what you're Your friend
Speaker 7: is not someone that you meet on the street and
Speaker 7: you're like, oh, that's good, that's a good job. You're
Speaker 7: doing a good job. Your friend is someone who's like, dude,
Speaker 7: that shit sucks.
Speaker 1: Bro, what the are you do?
Speaker 7: And you know what I'm saying, And it comes from
Speaker 7: a place of love and concern. That's radical friendship.
Speaker 1: Your friends the one that's like, bitch, you look like
Speaker 1: a cross dresser. You need to pick out a job.
Speaker 1: Someone says, needs to buy a thing of lipliner.
Speaker 5: You need to like that you look.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 7: So that's what I mean by like radical friendship. And
Speaker 7: like the thing is and I this is a genuine
Speaker 7: belief that I hold currently, right, is that like the
Speaker 7: world will be a much funnier place if everyone gets
Speaker 7: their basic needs met because I think the reason why,
Speaker 7: like a lot of comedians, a lot of people have
Speaker 7: said this that like no one can take a joke anymore,
Speaker 7: and it's like, Bro, if I can't pay my rent
Speaker 7: and I don't know where my next fucking food is
Speaker 7: coming from, and I'm tripping the fuck out on, I'm
Speaker 7: not gonna take your little joke about you know, yeah
Speaker 7: whatever the fuck sitting down, like, I'm going to use
Speaker 7: that to beat the shit out of you because I
Speaker 7: need to.
Speaker 1: I need some kind of like need that release. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you can't find you can't find justice in
Speaker 4: like any any real part of your life or any
Speaker 4: place that matter.
Speaker 2: Yeah, people find themselves in the comment section just you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, a lot.
Speaker 5: Of those people like this. This is another thing I
Speaker 5: believe we've talked about before.
Speaker 1: But like I'm all, I've always been like a firm
Speaker 1: believer of like if it's funny, it's it's funny, like
Speaker 1: it's you know, it's funny. But like for something to
Speaker 1: be funny even if it's offensive. And that's like I'm
Speaker 1: not mad at like Dave Chappelle, for instance, for like
Speaker 1: making trans jokes that like are offensive. I think Dave
Speaker 1: Chappelle can make trans jokes, even offensive ones, but he
Speaker 1: doesn't understand stand the trans experience even a little bit,
Speaker 1: right right, There are plenty of cis people that like,
Speaker 1: like I mean Nick Mallins a good example of this,
Speaker 1: Like he's a he's just genuinely a funny comedian and
Speaker 1: he tells a lot of offensive jokes, and but he
Speaker 1: like can make a trans joke because I can tell that,
Speaker 1: like he's probably met a trans person before and been
Speaker 1: nice to them, you know, Like like people can, like
Speaker 1: if you just have a baseline understanding of the trans experience,
Speaker 1: there's a lot of humor to be found there, even
Speaker 1: if you're not trans.
Speaker 7: I came up with a male to male transitionship. That's
Speaker 7: a bit that I keep going back on that, like
Speaker 7: dudes doing steroids are male to male, and they're so cunty,
Speaker 7: especially when they're doing the like the last bread. You
Speaker 7: know what I'm saying, It looks like it's beautiful.
Speaker 5: It looks like a scene from Bou Travi, That's what
Speaker 5: I'm saying.
Speaker 7: Yeah, bodybuilders, and those are the most masculine men, like
Speaker 7: you know, in their minds, they're doing it for themselves.
Speaker 7: That's Doug. You have trans you have trans goals, you
Speaker 7: know what I'm saying, Like you're experiencing like gender euphoria
Speaker 7: when you're a big masculine mane.
Speaker 6: People.
Speaker 11: People like offensive humor, edgy kind of humor. It's it's
Speaker 11: a high it has a higher skill skill floor, I
Speaker 11: guess to like execute it correctly. And people want to
Speaker 11: go out there and be like, yeah, I'm fucking edgy
Speaker 11: and they blast a racial slur and then they get
Speaker 11: smashed by the torust demon of comedy and then they
Speaker 11: just want to complain that it's not fair.
Speaker 6: But it's like, no, just get good, man.
Speaker 7: Yeah, you have to start a podcast and then start
Speaker 7: a YouTube channel and then make an epstein fit like
Speaker 7: tier list, and that's.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean, that's what you get good.
Speaker 9: You know.
Speaker 1: Another another strategy is getting worse, like just like dumbing
Speaker 1: it down to like the op salute stupidest possible thing,
Speaker 1: to where it's like, it's so stupid, how could you
Speaker 1: even be? Like uncle bunga brain we have what is it,
Speaker 1: the Unga Bunga mindset.
Speaker 7: It's we.
Speaker 6: Also very important in the community.
Speaker 1: Yeah yes, yeah, yeah, Shoggy, we're mind melded there like for.
Speaker 7: This was never the intention, right, but I get I
Speaker 7: get d ms all the time from people being like
Speaker 7: I found your show from like Western kabuki shouts out
Speaker 7: to those guys I found. I found your podcast through
Speaker 7: this person or these people or this guy show me
Speaker 7: the podcast, and I love your podcast, And I just like,
Speaker 7: I appreciate how much space you you like, how much
Speaker 7: space you you really leave for like queerness in your podcast.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, what are you fucking talking about?
Speaker 6: What not hell?
Speaker 1: Because like I don't yeah, because I don't get it.
Speaker 1: I think it's just because you don't even think of
Speaker 1: it that way, Like this is like just your friends.
Speaker 5: Like it's like I'm just hanging out with my friend.
Speaker 4: Making space for queer space, like making space for queers
Speaker 4: or whatever. And it's like, I mean, that's gonna happen
Speaker 4: by default if you're just fucking nice to everybody, dog
Speaker 4: like you like a regular person, Like what do you mean, Oh,
Speaker 4: I really appreciate how you're how you're making space for queers.
Speaker 4: So you like what you're telling me essentially is that
Speaker 4: you appreciate that that Marcos isn't calling me a training right,
Speaker 4: not being called a faggot.
Speaker 6: The baseline is not in a good place. It is
Speaker 6: a little weird to get the HR language sometimes, but
Speaker 6: as long as you feel good and they feel cozy.
Speaker 6: I guess it's fine.
Speaker 8: We can.
Speaker 7: I don't think they listen to the same pod because,
Speaker 7: like I call, I call Sho's gay for loving his
Speaker 7: girlfriend at least once a week. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 7: That's what I'm saying. I'm like, I'm constantly unqueering gay sex.
Speaker 7: I'm like, no, actually, two men having sex is the
Speaker 7: straightest thing you could do, Like we both love pussy.
Speaker 1: Dude, what are you talking about? Right? I remember I
Speaker 1: remember one of the one one time I went on
Speaker 1: your show and you told me I've told the other
Speaker 1: people this story because it's so funny.
Speaker 5: But like how you said you were like in high
Speaker 5: school and you were just like the town hole.
Speaker 1: You were like going like with your with your friend,
Speaker 1: like who was fucking you in the ass to to
Speaker 1: CVS to buy like lube and condoms, and you like
Speaker 1: looked up at him and you were like, wait, dude,
Speaker 1: like are we gay?
Speaker 5: Like what do you what are you talking about?
Speaker 1: I wish I could have and like that in high
Speaker 1: school because when I was having gay sex in high school,
Speaker 1: I was it was I was ashamed. There was no
Speaker 1: there was no loop, there was a jar of petroleum jelly.
Speaker 1: We never talked about it. It was shameful. We joke
Speaker 1: about it now because it's funny, though not the petroleum jelly.
Speaker 7: No.
Speaker 1: The thing. The thing was is that this is what happened.
Speaker 7: This is the first time someone had called me gay
Speaker 7: was when I was like thirteen, right, So when I
Speaker 7: was thirteen years old.
Speaker 5: That's kind of old. I was getting gay when I
Speaker 5: was like fetal, like serious, but I'm not.
Speaker 7: I'm not outwardly. I'm not like outwardly like I'm not flamboyant.
Speaker 7: I mean I am, but in a way that is more.
Speaker 3: I love.
Speaker 1: I love when gay people's asia like anyone. I'm not
Speaker 1: even that fabulous, it's not it's not.
Speaker 11: Yeah, there's nothing for any gay coated villains entirely subdicine.
Speaker 7: I'm more menacing than I am. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: I got more.
Speaker 5: I know you've got you you give mask for sure,
Speaker 5: but I can tell you're a little for of.
Speaker 7: Course you would have a Howard Ashman and Alan, but
Speaker 7: that's okay. Here's what happened, right, Here's what happened. When
Speaker 7: I was thirteen years old, I was with this girl.
Speaker 7: We had been together for a while, her name is Mary, right,
Speaker 7: and then we broke up. Yeah, we broke up, and
Speaker 7: like Mary had her brother named Barry.
Speaker 1: They're not.
Speaker 2: Marry and Barry.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I hate the stories you tell. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because I don't.
Speaker 7: There's no way I could write this ship because it's
Speaker 7: because it's real, you know what I'm saying, Like it's true.
Speaker 5: But giving voice to what we always think.
Speaker 1: Every time. I love it, but it's always just like
Speaker 1: it's like the happiest writing I've ever.
Speaker 7: It's real life. Is the problem is that I didn't
Speaker 7: write the joke, you know what I'm saying, Like the
Speaker 7: human parents wrote to you. Yeah, the her parents wrote it.
Speaker 7: So so me and Barry like we're best friends anyways,
Speaker 7: and we got we were like friendly, We used to
Speaker 7: hang out and we used to like ride bikes together.
Speaker 7: And then one day out of the fucking blue, I
Speaker 7: hadn't been with I hadn't been with like Mary in
Speaker 7: like six or seven months, and then one day Barry
Speaker 7: was just like, dude, you're so cool, Like I missed
Speaker 7: used to come over the house all the time, like
Speaker 7: it sucks, and then he just fucking leaned in and
Speaker 7: kissed me, and like I didn't care because he kind
Speaker 7: of looked like a sister and I'm like, hey, I'm down.
Speaker 7: This means nothing. It's like listen, I'm just you know
Speaker 7: what I'm saying.
Speaker 5: This is so like a Wallflower House moment.
Speaker 7: Yeah, And so he got weird about it, and then
Speaker 7: he told his friends that I kissed him when people
Speaker 7: went down, right, and he told everybody, oh, yeah, he
Speaker 7: kissed me, blah blah, like he's being fucking he's gay.
Speaker 7: And so his friends got together and decided they were
Speaker 7: gonna like call me gay like and like in a
Speaker 7: in a menacing way. And I beat the dog shit
Speaker 7: out of all three of them. I like proceeded to
Speaker 7: fuck them up because I'm the size that I am now,
Speaker 7: but like they're like twinks, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 7: I beat the ship out.
Speaker 1: Of them, Like I did.
Speaker 5: I love the idea. I remember gay Mexican like.
Speaker 7: So then I went, I will like before I left,
Speaker 7: I was like, remember like they they called me like
Speaker 7: the f slur, But I was like, remember an f slur,
Speaker 7: an f slur whooped your ass dog?
Speaker 1: Remember that?
Speaker 7: Do you know what I'm saying? Like no, that's and
Speaker 7: then after after that, people were like yeah.
Speaker 1: Marcus is he's like he'll kiss you, but he's not
Speaker 1: gay dude.
Speaker 5: One of my fam Every time I hear it told,
Speaker 5: he's like.
Speaker 1: He like he'll like do gay stuff with you, but
Speaker 1: he's not gay dude. Like he can beat the funk.
Speaker 9: Out of you.
Speaker 1: So don't about him.
Speaker 3: He's not.
Speaker 5: He's a nice guy. Yeah, a cool guy.
Speaker 3: Really did.
Speaker 7: I did internalize that now because every now and then,
Speaker 7: like the last I was just like maybe like eleven
Speaker 7: years ago, I had a boyfriend and we were like,
Speaker 7: you know, we were boyfriends, like we fucking lived together,
Speaker 7: like it was, it was a real relationship. I met
Speaker 7: his parents and he couldn't meet mine because my parents
Speaker 7: did not want anything to do with that. But you
Speaker 7: know what I mean, Like it was whatever.
Speaker 11: And then.
Speaker 7: His mom one day where like she was like I'm
Speaker 7: so proud of my gay son and like him bringing
Speaker 7: and then she said that like how far he's come,
Speaker 7: and like I'm proud of him.
Speaker 1: I've always supported him. And I was like, gay son,
Speaker 1: what are you talking about?
Speaker 3: You're gay?
Speaker 1: This isn't we're not, this is we're like friends or something.
Speaker 1: So it's kind of like like homeism is it's it's
Speaker 1: communistic in the sense that like like communism, you know,
Speaker 1: it's like a moneyless, class list stateless society and like
Speaker 1: a genderless, sexless, sexual orientationless society.
Speaker 2: That's like the type of relationship I pay to have
Speaker 2: access to, like on a monthly basis, Like.
Speaker 6: You could always go to Patriot.
Speaker 1: Honestly, Marcos, that's kind of what it's like being a
Speaker 1: trans woman with us. His boyfriend, like his parents will
Speaker 1: be like, Oh, I'm so proud of our gay son.
Speaker 7: What are you talking about?
Speaker 5: What do you what are you talking about?
Speaker 1: I have a beautiful Yeah, that's why.
Speaker 7: Like it never it's it's a lot of our a
Speaker 7: lot of our followers and a lot of our listener
Speaker 7: base they're trans, right, Like we have the homie community
Speaker 7: and the trans community is a big like overlap.
Speaker 1: It's a big fucking circle, that's right.
Speaker 7: And like everyone's always I get accused of this all
Speaker 7: the time online people are like, oh, this is egg behavior,
Speaker 7: and I'm like, if you speak to me instantly that
Speaker 7: I'm past that. At some point, I'm male to male transition.
Speaker 6: People can only hold so many ideas in their head
Speaker 6: at a given time. The Internet, that's okay, they'll move
Speaker 6: on to the next wa.
Speaker 1: The Internet, Internet queer people that like speculate on like
Speaker 1: other people's gender is something that always no annoying stop doing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I saw you go off on that one creator.
Speaker 6: I hate.
Speaker 1: The show.
Speaker 2: I don't want to give her the airtime. Yeah, she
Speaker 2: will cause me to go into rapt out of the animals.
Speaker 2: She used to live here in Atlanta. That's what scares me.
Speaker 5: Really.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's like like a food like I don't know
Speaker 1: if like she's actually a food critic, but like that's
Speaker 1: what she says her job is.
Speaker 7: I saw her food. I saw her food surgery, like
Speaker 7: bottom surgery.
Speaker 1: I was like, this is this is worse. That video
Speaker 1: is horrendered. Have you guys seen the movie Dressed to Kill?
Speaker 1: Have an you guys seen that movie?
Speaker 6: Talking about it?
Speaker 5: It's an evil tranny movie from Brian to Palmer.
Speaker 1: It's pretty good. The one how welch No, it's Michael
Speaker 1: Caine and anyway, there's like there's a scene in that
Speaker 1: movie where.
Speaker 4: Michael Caine playing a trans woman would be so fucking funny.
Speaker 5: It's very awesome. Yeah, yeah, it's you still sounds like
Speaker 5: Michael Kine.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it's a classic like evil tranny movie like
Speaker 1: Psycho or like Silence of the Lambs and.
Speaker 7: Astron The Lambs gets a bad rep for being considered
Speaker 7: like an anti trans movie because they very clearly state
Speaker 7: in the movie like trans.
Speaker 1: We've mentioned this quote on the pod how j D.
Speaker 1: Foster is like Trent Sextuals are actually very docile people.
Speaker 1: Also Jodie Foster. It's kind of serving like a like
Speaker 1: a hun voice and.
Speaker 7: Doctor like they were people. Buffalo Bill is not trains.
Speaker 7: He's much worse.
Speaker 1: Right, he's a freak across he has.
Speaker 7: That is there's like he's a Craigslist style freak before existed.
Speaker 7: You know what, right, I don't know. I don't know
Speaker 7: how those.
Speaker 6: Guys from your like horrible gross sex stories you tell sometimes.
Speaker 5: Yeah, the butter guys I grew up.
Speaker 7: He's the butter man. He's the butter man.
Speaker 1: Can we hear the butter story?
Speaker 5: Mark? Hold on, We'll save the butter story.
Speaker 7: Yeah, so the by gone air I'll just lead into
Speaker 7: the by gone air of Craigslist was my sexual cutting
Speaker 7: my teeth, right, Like, that's where I learned how to
Speaker 7: be a freak.
Speaker 5: That was that was that was where you did like
Speaker 5: that wraps.
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, it was.
Speaker 1: It was my b rather a mile.
Speaker 7: Yeah yeah, oh my god, Claire, it has a real
Speaker 7: nice penis, right, yeah, that's.
Speaker 1: Sweating bom forget balls in my mouth already.
Speaker 7: Oh my god. One come shot, Yeah you go, one shot.
Speaker 1: You only got one my face, You've got a chance
Speaker 1: to blow instead of Britney Murphy's Brittany Briner lesslie eight mile.
Speaker 7: Yeah, Jesus fucking Christ. Okay, okay, So I was trying
Speaker 7: to get to it, but on Craigslist. On Craigslist, I
Speaker 7: was like I was, I was doing this thing like
Speaker 7: a freak would do because like I was just extremely
Speaker 7: I was extremely single, but I was also like extremely
Speaker 7: bored and horny, and I had a bunch of like
Speaker 7: bad bocts.
Speaker 2: I would post on Craigslist all the time and respond
Speaker 2: to ads.
Speaker 7: My problem, My problem is that if I'm not working
Speaker 7: like three or four jobs, if like not every waking
Speaker 7: moment of my life, and this was especially true when I.
Speaker 1: He will just become a community whole.
Speaker 7: Yeah no, no, no, if I don't have like something,
Speaker 7: if I don't have some ship to do, I like
Speaker 7: instantly will just like, well, I gotta I gotta put
Speaker 7: my dick in something or I got I gotta yeah,
Speaker 7: it's gotta be like you know what I'm saying. So
Speaker 7: I was on Craigslist constantly and I was just answering
Speaker 7: the most unhinged as many things as I could find,
Speaker 7: like just the same shit. And so one time there
Speaker 7: was a guy and he was willing to pay three
Speaker 7: hundred dollars for someone to bathe with him, right, and
Speaker 7: that was all it was, was like, I'm willing to
Speaker 7: pay someone three hundred dollars to come and bathe with
Speaker 7: me in my like you know. And then he says,
Speaker 7: like kind of a secluded areas out it's an outdoor situation.
Speaker 7: You come bathe with me in three hundred bucks. I'm big,
Speaker 7: and I'm like strong enough to like I'm short, I'm
Speaker 7: a short guy. I'm like, you know, a little dude,
Speaker 7: but I'm strong and I like work out. So I'm
Speaker 7: like positive I could whoop this guy's ass if the worst,
Speaker 7: you know what I'm saying, If worst comes to worse,
Speaker 7: I'll kill him. That I'm not worried about like losing
Speaker 7: my life here right, Like this is whatever. So I
Speaker 7: go and I get there and I get to this giant,
Speaker 7: like palatial, like villa in fucking deep in the pala
Speaker 7: walta like foothills.
Speaker 1: Right, it's huge, and like.
Speaker 7: He takes me into this house and the first thing
Speaker 7: that I greeted with is his wife at the dinner
Speaker 7: tube or at the and she's just like oh hello,
Speaker 7: and I'm like, oh hey, what's up. And then like
Speaker 7: I'm like at this point, like okay, what's going on,
Speaker 7: Like what's happening? And then like he just he's like, oh,
Speaker 7: come on, come with me, And so then we keep
Speaker 7: going and we go into the backyard, go into the backyard,
Speaker 7: and in the shed, like there's like this big shed.
Speaker 7: And as I'm walking towards the shed, I noticed I
Speaker 7: have a very sensitive nose and I notice a smell,
Speaker 7: like a very distinct.
Speaker 1: Smell that was like dairy like.
Speaker 7: Like like a like a fucking sour, creamy smell, right,
Speaker 7: And I was like, hmm, I don't I don't.
Speaker 1: Know or like where it's just going.
Speaker 5: There was not a plate of hasslebacked potatoes at the end.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 7: Yeah, So I get in there, I get closer and
Speaker 7: closer to the smell is like getting intense, and I
Speaker 7: get it and in it is this really big barefoot bathtub,
Speaker 7: like a huge bear like the bear col Yeah yeah,
Speaker 7: huge massive battup right, enough to fit like three or
Speaker 7: four people in it. Wow, And like it's he it's there,
Speaker 7: and in it is a thick layer of butter all
Speaker 7: like so it's filled and I'm like what. I'm like,
Speaker 7: what in the fuck is this? And he turns on
Speaker 7: he turns on this little like machine and the machine
Speaker 7: is like it's it's just like a big generator with
Speaker 7: a bunch of like like you know, the reptile rock,
Speaker 7: the warmers, you know what I'm talking about. Just take
Speaker 7: all yeah, to make the butter softer so you can
Speaker 7: like make a liquid to clarify. And he like turns
Speaker 7: it on and he starts skimming the ship off the
Speaker 7: top and he's like making yeah no, and he's like
Speaker 7: sitting there. I think he was waiting for me to leave.
Speaker 7: He was waiting for me to flip out and run away.
Speaker 7: But I was like, three hundred dollars is a lot
Speaker 7: of money. That's not even that much depends on where yeah,
Speaker 7: it was living, it's a lot of money for me.
Speaker 7: So I like yeah, So like I'm like okay, I'm
Speaker 7: just gonna see where this is going, like, and there
Speaker 7: was no weapons or anything in there, which thank god, right,
Speaker 7: Like there's nothing you could have used as a weapon
Speaker 7: in there that I saw. So I was like, okay,
Speaker 7: if you shot, if you shot a gun full of butter,
Speaker 7: I'm positive it's not nothing.
Speaker 1: So smooth just like shoots popcorn.
Speaker 7: Yeah, So.
Speaker 4: He turns it on.
Speaker 7: It finally clarifies and he strips naked and I strip naked,
Speaker 7: and we both sit in the backup butter you mean yeah,
Speaker 7: Like it turns into like liquid at this point, and
Speaker 7: it's not like hot, it's like really did help. It
Speaker 7: was not popcorn, but.
Speaker 5: It's like, hey, brings some like lobsters with you or so.
Speaker 7: I'm expecting, Like I'm expecting, Like he gets real close
Speaker 7: to me and he like like essentially puts his arm
Speaker 7: over me. He's cuddling me, and I'm expecting, well, at
Speaker 7: any point now he's gonna like turn me over and
Speaker 7: fucking me in the ass or something, right, And I
Speaker 7: try to touch his dick because that's what I thought.
Speaker 7: I just wanted this to be over as soon as possible,
Speaker 7: and he like batted my hand away and he just
Speaker 7: sat there and he started talking to me about like
Speaker 7: his life and like where he grew up.
Speaker 1: And he's like, I'm from Wisconsin. Like he was just
Speaker 1: talking telling me all this like life story and shit,
Speaker 1: I own theaters. He was like he was like.
Speaker 7: Massaging my back and stuff and like and like just
Speaker 7: like fucking just talking to me and touching me. But
Speaker 7: he'd like.
Speaker 1: Refused to let me touch him or anything like that.
Speaker 7: And then after like after about two hours, he fucking
Speaker 7: we're done, I guess, but like no sex happened, and
Speaker 7: like he fucking we leave and then he was like, hey, thanks,
Speaker 7: I really appreciate.
Speaker 1: I wait, so you didn't get in the butter.
Speaker 7: I didn't get in the butter with him?
Speaker 9: This was this was in the butter seems like it was.
Speaker 5: It was so no, because did you shower? Did you
Speaker 5: shower the butter off?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 1: I did in his house, but I didn't get there's
Speaker 1: no way to get it all out.
Speaker 7: There's but yeah, like.
Speaker 1: Like when I was feeling you would break out like
Speaker 1: a bit like I did.
Speaker 7: I did really bad.
Speaker 1: I broke out like I had like a had body
Speaker 1: acte for like like a discussion.
Speaker 2: Well not only that, like I'm thinking about the bacteria.
Speaker 2: Has he cleaned that butter?
Speaker 5: Just like I didn't think too much story, just enjoy it.
Speaker 6: Maybe it's it's probably salted.
Speaker 1: You just go through like the rest of the week,
Speaker 1: flipping on everything.
Speaker 6: So it's like it was like a good carry.
Speaker 1: I don't I couldn't tell you.
Speaker 7: I could not you could have been it could have
Speaker 7: been homemade if I if I'm being real with you.
Speaker 1: Would could definitely have been homemade.
Speaker 7: This definitely because his wife, yeah maybe his wife, My
Speaker 7: wife was His wife was very nice and she like
Speaker 7: brought us tea afterwards, and I was like, I have
Speaker 7: to get the fuck out of here.
Speaker 1: Like I don't know what sounds like, get out the situation.
Speaker 1: Sure that sounds like a Todd Solon's movie.
Speaker 6: I would have had a butter bath with a third time.
Speaker 7: My most memorable, like like this hookup that I think about,
Speaker 7: like have nightmares about all the time, was that when
Speaker 7: n I like answered a it was a non dump,
Speaker 7: right is what they call those you know talking about
Speaker 7: Yeah yeah, yeah, But no one had answered this guy
Speaker 7: because he was wearing he just like just come into
Speaker 7: the room and blah blah blah. So then I came
Speaker 7: into the room. The ad was up for like maybe
Speaker 7: five minutes, right, and like you had to email him.
Speaker 7: He sent me the fucking the address. I go to
Speaker 7: the address and I get inside and he's wearing like
Speaker 7: a wedding dress, and I'm just like, well, I I'm
Speaker 7: gonna pound this dude out. So I'm doing my thing,
Speaker 7: I like nut and then I'm about to like walk away,
Speaker 7: and then like he grabs my hand and he holds
Speaker 7: my hand for a little bit. So I'm like, oh,
Speaker 7: this guy wants to cuddle maybe, and I'm like I'm
Speaker 7: down with that. So I lay down in the bed
Speaker 7: next to him, and I start cuddling, and he like
Speaker 7: it's the hand of the back to like touch your hand.
Speaker 7: That's like the international sign, and like I want a
Speaker 7: little more than just like I don't know if you're
Speaker 7: aware of that, but that's what that means.
Speaker 1: That's like I'm not right, Like kissing is cool and
Speaker 1: stuff like intimacy. That's like the intimacy thing.
Speaker 7: Intimacy's list, So I figured, okay, cool. So like I
Speaker 7: lay on the bed and he cuddles up next to
Speaker 7: me and he's cuddling, and then like I like noticed
Speaker 7: he was crying.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, yo, like are you good?
Speaker 7: Like what's going on? And then he's like, this is
Speaker 7: my wife's dress and I'm like, oh, it's the cuck
Speaker 7: fanalty like fantasy thing.
Speaker 1: And then he goes and then he goes.
Speaker 7: She passed away six months ago and I miss her
Speaker 7: so much, and I was just like Jesus use and
Speaker 7: I'm I'm like, now emotionally invested in this, you know
Speaker 7: what I'm saying. I get like now, I'm like, so
Speaker 7: I stayed with him the whole night and we talked
Speaker 7: about all kinds of ship.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's also it's like a solon.
Speaker 7: We stayed in contact for like seven months and then
Speaker 7: we just stopped fucking texting me back, but we.
Speaker 2: Like, did you like fuck him more like once or
Speaker 2: twice after that?
Speaker 1: But he was not and.
Speaker 7: He was not into it. He wasn't gay.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 7: I don't know how to.
Speaker 2: Explain that he needed to get sucked in the ass
Speaker 2: to grieve with his wife.
Speaker 7: I get this, dude, but I don't know, and I
Speaker 7: like feel, to this day I have nightmares about anymore.
Speaker 1: That is. Yeah, that's like a level of like psychological
Speaker 1: dysfunction that like if you spend too much time thinking about, well,
Speaker 1: the funeral go in.
Speaker 7: I mean, but the thing is, what's fucking you have?
Speaker 7: Carmen like his dead wife's is more entirely different level of.
Speaker 6: Okay, that's still.
Speaker 11: That's like okay, Yeah, this guy's brain right, is connecting
Speaker 11: to something.
Speaker 2: He wants to like, I don't think I can't.
Speaker 6: I can't his wife and this is the way I'm
Speaker 6: working through trauma. I can't understand that.
Speaker 1: Why does a man need to make.
Speaker 7: I don't know why man needs little bike?
Speaker 1: But funny, if the butter guy had like pictures of
Speaker 1: like he has like pictures of lobsters all throughout his house,
Speaker 1: you're like walking through like another.
Speaker 7: I was like you, so, did you grow up like
Speaker 7: you from Wisconsin? Did you grow up on like a
Speaker 7: dairy farm? And he's like, no, we're coary people. Like
Speaker 7: Like what.
Speaker 4: That's such a funny way to refer to yourself as
Speaker 4: like old money from the country.
Speaker 5: Yeah, He's like, it's like related to Daniel plain View.
Speaker 5: Were we weren't the Maple family. We were the Quarry family.
Speaker 7: We were the we did all the Yeah, but I mean,
Speaker 7: like I don't know, I think that's kind of why
Speaker 7: I have the show that I have because like, I
Speaker 7: fucking have a long history of interacting with psychopaths on
Speaker 7: the Internet without without I know this is going to
Speaker 7: sound crazy, but I don't feel like I'm worse for it.
Speaker 1: Right, I don't mean it sounds like a doing a
Speaker 1: podcast is better than being a butterhole, being.
Speaker 5: Down butter hole.
Speaker 11: Marcus, all of your sex stories always make me feel
Speaker 11: like I've been wearing the same pair of underwear and socks.
Speaker 1: For entire They made me.
Speaker 5: They make me hungry, just.
Speaker 6: Grimey, hot couch feeling.
Speaker 7: I was on the I was on the part of
Speaker 7: the I was like on the dirtiest, filthiest part of
Speaker 7: the Internet for like a very long time. And in
Speaker 7: that way, like I was also like in San Jose.
Speaker 7: It's San Jose is a terrible fucking state. Especially San
Speaker 7: Jose in twenty ten is like probably one of the
Speaker 7: worst areas in the world because it's just like there's
Speaker 7: so much money pouring into here, but like there was
Speaker 7: no it.
Speaker 1: Was a hiccktown.
Speaker 7: These are hicktowns, right, So like imagine, like imagine imagine
Speaker 7: if like Georgia was like a hicktown, like like Savannah,
Speaker 7: Georgia is a hick town.
Speaker 2: Right, Imagine.
Speaker 5: There's plenty of hicktowns down here.
Speaker 7: Actually, hold on, imagine imagine like make them right.
Speaker 1: Man can know about Macon George.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I know so much about the South.
Speaker 1: It's ridiculous, my boyfriends.
Speaker 7: Okay, imagine if making. Imagine if Making overnight like had
Speaker 7: an oil field and it's now with billions.
Speaker 1: Do you know what I'm saying? And like everyone who
Speaker 1: lives in Making is now worth billions, And that's exactly.
Speaker 5: I think a better example would be like Loganville or like.
Speaker 7: What is that Point Church? Where the fun?
Speaker 1: That's Louisiana. I think you know what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: Point Church. Yeah, there's a fucking place in Louisiana called
Speaker 1: Point Church. Got popular. I don't know this one random
Speaker 1: church from Louisiana.
Speaker 7: It's a place called Point Like.
Speaker 5: You guys are from the South. You all know each other, right?
Speaker 2: What is that true detective or some ship?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 7: No, the I had a home, So like, do abandon
Speaker 7: what is it abandoned?
Speaker 1: Urban like exploring ship?
Speaker 2: Yeah, so that's I should do that.
Speaker 7: I was like really big into that in like two
Speaker 7: thousand and eight, two thousand and nine up until like
Speaker 7: I realized it, you.
Speaker 2: Were, I could see cruise and these are banded.
Speaker 7: Yeah, there's a lot of a lot of it. Was
Speaker 7: scouting out potential places, like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love the idea of a gay guy. That's like,
Speaker 1: I'm just ino urban explorer.
Speaker 7: I was, you know what it was was I was
Speaker 7: more into urban exploring, but I was like, I could
Speaker 7: have gay sexier.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just looking at like a beautiful landscape and being
Speaker 1: like you're just trying to really good.
Speaker 7: Yeah, but no, I mean I've had a ridiculous ass
Speaker 7: because like the Bay Area itself is a weird place
Speaker 7: because it's a boom and bus town, right, So like
Speaker 7: there is times when the money is fucking rary. Everybody
Speaker 7: has money, and so like tons of people move in
Speaker 7: here and then tons of places just get abandoned. And
Speaker 7: like the city that I'm from, that happened, like just
Speaker 7: like a huge swath of got abandoned because all the
Speaker 7: money dried up in the nineties because the dot com
Speaker 7: Uh yeah, so like fucking there was nothing like they
Speaker 7: had built. Uh they built two malls in this small
Speaker 7: town only to have them open for less than six
Speaker 7: months and they close both.
Speaker 1: Of them, and then they Yeah.
Speaker 7: They so like just two giant, huge architectural structures that
Speaker 7: were just empty and like there wasn't even enough people
Speaker 7: for there to be squatters in this area, you know
Speaker 7: what I'm saying. Like they were just empty, they were
Speaker 7: just there was no one in there. So that's what
Speaker 7: I did for years and like it because I was
Speaker 7: in that weird fucking realm of psychopaths. Of course I
Speaker 7: was gonna be on Craigslist.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, some crazy should we who's
Speaker 2: does anyone else have any crazy Craigslist suck ups to share?
Speaker 5: I've never I've never used. I've just.
Speaker 6: Seven.
Speaker 11: I kind of tried to get laid on craigslows like
Speaker 11: once or twice and it didn't work out. But I
Speaker 11: did get one guy who spent like years messaging me
Speaker 11: on on freaking Yahoo Messenger and he just wanted to
Speaker 11: just wanted to jerk off, and he was very pushy
Speaker 11: about it, and he he was insistent that it wasn't.
Speaker 2: You know, nothing, something recurring thing.
Speaker 6: Gay it is, but he just kind of sex pested
Speaker 6: me for years. Want to come over? And jay o, bro,
Speaker 6: you want to come over? Job?
Speaker 1: He sounded like guys like the met what they say
Speaker 1: on workaholics.
Speaker 11: I don't know that, but just here's Eventually he stopped,
Speaker 11: and there were times I was like, maybe we could
Speaker 11: just hang out.
Speaker 6: I don't know, I only make friends. I just don't
Speaker 6: have to jerk off man.
Speaker 7: We could just be the worst. I think the worst
Speaker 7: thing I ever happened was the Reddit hookup. I had
Speaker 7: a Reddit hookup, which was the.
Speaker 1: C last Yeah, I who worked at Medieval Times on time.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, off the top of my head, that's
Speaker 1: the night. Uh No, he was one night. I think
Speaker 1: he was like some sort of like jesture or something
Speaker 1: like that, like a player, like he played like a
Speaker 1: liar or like something like that.
Speaker 5: He was basically, this guy's got pussy all the time.
Speaker 5: The nights are hot as fuck.
Speaker 1: I remember I went to Medieval Times in Myrtle Beach
Speaker 1: when I was on vacation with my friend and his
Speaker 1: like grandparents and my friend's like granddad. Like the whole
Speaker 1: time was like trying to he was like he was
Speaker 1: like every time, like the blue night would be like
Speaker 1: like because you know, each like section of the stadium
Speaker 1: has like like their own assigned to it, and every time,
Speaker 1: like our night would be like, oh, you're noted, can
Speaker 1: you make some was like this, like like eighty year
Speaker 1: old granddad was like, look at me, I love you
Speaker 1: Blue Knight.
Speaker 5: It was so cool.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're awesome. I would love to have sex with
Speaker 1: my loving boyfriends and not any night from medieval times because.
Speaker 3: I don't.
Speaker 1: Anamous woman. Yeah, shouts out to medieval times.
Speaker 2: Medieval times where I got my pussy wet for the
Speaker 2: first one for real. It was the Yellow Knight for me.
Speaker 7: Yeah, Carmen, what was your what was your hookup?
Speaker 2: Because I wanted to hear, Oh, yeah, do you want
Speaker 2: to buckle up for this one?
Speaker 1: I'm strapped in?
Speaker 2: Technically wasn't it was? Actually it was a It was
Speaker 2: a Marta train hookup. Anyone ever had a Marta train hookup?
Speaker 2: Like subway train hook up?
Speaker 9: No?
Speaker 2: Okay, Well I had just started hormones and I was
Speaker 2: dressed like a hooker. I was wearing fish nets short
Speaker 2: shorts on top of the fish nets, platform shoes and
Speaker 2: like a Helloicity tank top and like this guy blew
Speaker 2: a kiss at me on the train and immediately I
Speaker 2: was like, yes, hello, you know. So he came and
Speaker 2: like sat next to me and was like hey, you
Speaker 2: want to like you want to like go get a
Speaker 2: place together. We stop at the fucking Buckhead marta station.
Speaker 2: We walk on the side of the street like literally
Speaker 2: like a couple on the fucking shoulder of the road,
Speaker 2: starter pack like like all of that.
Speaker 5: He takes me to a.
Speaker 2: Hotel on Cheshire Bridge. We buy the hotel room while
Speaker 2: I wait outside looking like a hooker with all my stuff,
Speaker 2: and we go inside and he starts doing metha.
Speaker 5: I was waiting for me to make an appearance in
Speaker 5: one of these stories.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and so he immediately starts doing math, and you know,
Speaker 2: I find out he's homeless, which is fine, you know,
Speaker 2: no big deal. But I could tell once like we
Speaker 2: got close enough because he kind of smelled bad, which
Speaker 2: you know what, I kind of like a little bit
Speaker 2: of stink.
Speaker 7: I get it, I get it, I get it.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I was like, okay, whatever, that's maybe why.
Speaker 2: And he was he was attractive, he was hot, Okay,
Speaker 2: I want to say, like I thought he was hot,
Speaker 2: like but then, uh, you know, after the math and
Speaker 2: like I said, no, no, thank you, no, thank you
Speaker 2: to the math. She's not ready for that yet, like
Speaker 2: Lacroix or literally me.
Speaker 4: He like.
Speaker 2: I was like, so like young and innocent. He like
Speaker 2: he's like, all right, well, you know, let's like get
Speaker 2: on the bed and like he like starts, he's like
Speaker 2: really nervous to have sex with me, and he like
Speaker 2: jerks me off. I guess correct, is that the correct terminology? Absolutely?
Speaker 2: Absolutely through my fish nets? Right, amazing orgasms, kind of
Speaker 2: actually amazing orgasm. Great, loved it. But then I was like, okay, well,
Speaker 2: are you gonna fuck me or what?
Speaker 4: Like come on?
Speaker 2: And turns out, okay, I made him go get condoms, right,
Speaker 2: he goes and gets the con because I was so scared.
Speaker 2: I don't know, we didn't have prep back then, uh huh.
Speaker 2: And and he comes back with the condoms. It's like
Speaker 2: one o'clock in the morning. At this point. It turns
Speaker 2: out that his penis is so small that the condom
Speaker 2: doesn't fit. Oh no, you know, I don't want a
Speaker 2: body shame anybody.
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, but also mess doesn't help that. Yeah yeah, yeah, he.
Speaker 2: Had a micro no big deal, you know, but no
Speaker 2: big deal.
Speaker 5: But yeah, it's it's not literally not a big deal.
Speaker 2: Literally, so actually yeah, we like so like he like
Speaker 2: couldn't like he like literally could not penetrate past my
Speaker 2: ash cheeks. So we just gave up at a certain
Speaker 2: point and he was like sweaty and on meth, and
Speaker 2: like I realized that he was never going to have
Speaker 2: an orgasm, because that's what happens when you're on meth.
Speaker 1: I guess, of course, yeah, it's for it's not really
Speaker 1: for like actually busting.
Speaker 2: I learned that day. But he yeah, he he promised
Speaker 2: me that he would pay me to take a uh
Speaker 2: taxi home from because there wasn't uber lyft, this was
Speaker 2: literally pre uber and lyft at this point.
Speaker 9: Uh.
Speaker 2: He told me he would pay for me to take
Speaker 2: a taxi home from Buckhead back to my parents' house
Speaker 2: in Lawrenceville.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 2: And I stayed up all night and we sat in
Speaker 2: bed while I like laid next to his like sweaty
Speaker 2: like body, and I don't think he slept. I fell
Speaker 2: asleep for about thirty minutes and then I woke up
Speaker 2: and immediately got my stuff and I was like, okay,
Speaker 2: I gotta go. And he gave me one hundred dollars.
Speaker 2: I gave that to the taxi driver and I was like,
Speaker 2: so I guess, I guess I had sex for money.
Speaker 2: I gave that to the taxi driver and then we
Speaker 2: were on our wait. Now, fast forward to me living
Speaker 2: in Little five Points later on, living in Atlanta. Later on,
Speaker 2: at some point in my life, I was riding my
Speaker 2: bike and I saw him?
Speaker 1: Was he one?
Speaker 5: Is he one of the homeless guys in a little
Speaker 5: five Points?
Speaker 2: Probably?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 1: Whow?
Speaker 2: Yeah? So I slept with one of the homeless guys
Speaker 2: a little five Points.
Speaker 7: And I know that.
Speaker 11: You know, you know, a little bit of money on yourself.
Speaker 11: You know, that's that's fine, you shouldn't. But you're spending
Speaker 11: lots of money.
Speaker 1: On hotels, priorities.
Speaker 5: Yeah, fair for.
Speaker 12: Girls, you know, maybe yeah, should be saving this a
Speaker 12: little more in cells, get less and less credibility to
Speaker 12: be hearing stories like this because you're not like Carmen.
Speaker 7: You're a very good looking woman. Like you know what
Speaker 7: I'm saying. I like, that's crazy to me that a
Speaker 7: homeless guy with a micro penis could smash you.
Speaker 5: Well, you didn't know he had a micro penis.
Speaker 1: I didn't know micro he hit that until it doesn't matter,
Speaker 1: that doesn't that's true.
Speaker 7: Yeah, That's what I'm saying. Like, you guys will be
Speaker 7: like guys on on TikTok will be Mike Cantel tilt
Speaker 7: is negative. It's over for me to shut up.
Speaker 1: There's a microphone.
Speaker 7: That's what I'm saying, Like I funk on the rag.
Speaker 7: You what are you talking about? You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 7: I'm five five, But looks like Danny DeVito. You're tripping, dude,
Speaker 7: like you have no idea what you're talking about.
Speaker 5: When I'm when I'm single, my standards are.
Speaker 6: Low, literally real square pants.
Speaker 11: Yeah, yeah, looks like she Phily has the type that's
Speaker 11: a little on the fetal alcohol.
Speaker 5: I have to respect. I have to fucking teacher for that.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 7: She fox line cooks.
Speaker 1: Everyone lends they want to line cooks now because because
Speaker 1: of the bear.
Speaker 7: Yeah, Jeremy Allen White does not look like a line cook.
Speaker 5: He doesn't. Yeah, that's the thing.
Speaker 7: Manager, He looks like a manager.
Speaker 1: One hundred.
Speaker 7: Because you're saying I look like I look like a
Speaker 7: line cook, all right, I'm a line cook standard.
Speaker 5: Just no, he does. He looks like the like the
Speaker 5: cooke head, like son of the owner.
Speaker 1: That like when he's managing the floor, you know you're
Speaker 1: in for the worst fucking night, like exactly. Yeah, he's yeah,
Speaker 1: he does not look like a fucking line cook. Line
Speaker 1: cooks are not line cooks don't go to the gym,
Speaker 1: like that's just they don't do that.
Speaker 5: They don't do that. They drink.
Speaker 1: That's literally they drink and do blow like that's It's
Speaker 1: like thisization of links has got to stop. And I
Speaker 1: say this as someone who's worth like ten years as
Speaker 1: a line cook, So I'm not besmirching it.
Speaker 5: I think I think they're great.
Speaker 7: If you're a line cook, it's a calling. You're not
Speaker 7: you don't do it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, life is not something to fetishize.
Speaker 7: I did it for three years because it was a
Speaker 7: job to me. I can't commit to that ship. I
Speaker 7: can't because it's not me. That's not it's not who I.
Speaker 1: Am, right, that's all style.
Speaker 5: No, I'm I'm a bargender. Now that's like being a
Speaker 5: capo and the mob.
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, absolutely absolutely.
Speaker 5: It's less work. It's I know how to read.
Speaker 7: So I have to be a manager, you know what
Speaker 7: I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have to work for tips, like I can't
Speaker 1: be I can't be working for like wages like no, yeah, well.
Speaker 5: We've gone on kind of long.
Speaker 6: Yeah, unlike that guy that hooked unlike the guy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I have other ones. You know what, Next time
Speaker 2: we talked, y'all, I'll tell you about the time that
Speaker 2: I was underage and accidentally went home.
Speaker 5: One on your show.
Speaker 7: Yeah, on my show. That's a me show. That's my
Speaker 7: shows specialty.
Speaker 2: I feel like I went into the house of a
Speaker 2: neo Nazi and I didn't.
Speaker 7: That's definitely an ancient story. I've been a couple of Nazis.
Speaker 7: They always crying. It's always it's a racial thing for them,
Speaker 7: Like you know what I'm saying, Like they love it,
Speaker 7: They're way into it. And then and then well you
Speaker 7: know what I'm saying, I nut and then they nut
Speaker 7: harder and then they go home, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 7: and the.
Speaker 6: Life and they're considering listening to the ancient show. They're
Speaker 6: enjoying this. I just like to let you know that
Speaker 6: most of the hosts of our show have never.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we normally.
Speaker 6: Most of us are not from California. We're from normal places.
Speaker 7: So yeah, that's problem. Yeah, there's no people with Yeah,
Speaker 7: a couple of Nazis.
Speaker 1: Just one time when I was hanging out in Lawrenceville, like, uh,
Speaker 1: we were like playing pool at this shitty bar, because
Speaker 1: every bar out there like sucks. But I remember I
Speaker 1: was playing pool with uh my girlfriends at the time,
Speaker 1: and there was like this guy who was like chatting
Speaker 1: with us, and he was like fairly like uh like personable,
Speaker 1: and then like he said something and I was like
Speaker 1: what He's like, yeah, dude, and he like pulled up
Speaker 1: his like like sleep. He was like, I'm a Nazi.
Speaker 1: We were like, okay, we're we're leaving. We're getting out
Speaker 1: of here and never coming back, like this is insane.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So that was my only interaction with an avowed white supremacist.
Speaker 5: I got out of there immediately, and uh yeah, so.
Speaker 7: Explain that it makes sense outside of the Bay Area.
Speaker 1: But okay, all right, well I think we should wrap
Speaker 1: this up before we say.
Speaker 5: It was a pretty bad note to end it on.
Speaker 1: Uh you should.
Speaker 4: You should maybe check out our podcasts were actually.
Speaker 1: Considerably way more normal.
Speaker 5: You're sorry.
Speaker 4: I'm sorry personally that this got derailed as quite heavy
Speaker 4: of a way normal and this is not representative of.
Speaker 5: How it usually is no place in the homie collective.
Speaker 4: You need to chock us out on on on SoundCloud
Speaker 4: or wherever you get your podcasts. We are The Ain't
Speaker 4: Ship Show. You want to check out our Patreon give
Speaker 4: us a dollar a month. You can get the whole
Speaker 4: backlog of our episodes at patreon dot com. Forward Slash
Speaker 4: the Homie Collective. I have been streaming lately at Twitch
Speaker 4: dot tv Forward Slash Professor Getter. That's to tease anybody
Speaker 4: else have anything they want to derailing the Nazishi.
Speaker 11: Thank you shouldn't underscore h vulgaris I'm not gonna say again.
Speaker 6: You can follow me if you caught that the first time.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I'm on YouTube at Answer Show. I'm also on
Speaker 7: Twitter at Answer Show and the podcast. If you google
Speaker 7: the podcast, you can actually find everything that we do,
Speaker 7: which is a lot of stuff like collectively and that's
Speaker 7: at the Ancient Show Official and you can google that
Speaker 7: and find a bunch of the random other ship that
Speaker 7: we do, like Substacks.
Speaker 5: I wanted to endorse you guys, sub Sock. It's really cool.
Speaker 2: I like the.
Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much for coming on those subscribe
Speaker 1: to Ana.
Speaker 2: Well that was a crazy fucking episode. Uh, Jane, are
Speaker 2: you ready to take some voicemails? We just have one
Speaker 2: crazy long voicemail today.
Speaker 1: I would love to help out our deer listener. So yes,
Speaker 1: let's take it away.
Speaker 2: Roll the taps.
Speaker 3: Hy ladies, long time listener, first time collar. It's Victoria
Speaker 3: from Rico here. So I'm not trying to kiss. Keep
Speaker 3: this short, but.
Speaker 6: Live I can run. So let's see.
Speaker 3: So I'm dating this guy that I met back in December.
Speaker 3: Here's a funny thing. When he met me at this
Speaker 3: bar that I was hanging out at, he didn't hop
Speaker 3: my tea for some reason, and I was brilliant shocked
Speaker 3: for some reason. But you're not necessarily not necessarily a problem,
Speaker 3: just like this alteration because I always think my voice,
Speaker 3: you know, runs a little bit deep and this and that.
Speaker 1: Wait can you pause it real quick? I'm sorry. So
Speaker 1: she met a guy that clocked her, did correct, did
Speaker 1: not clock her? Okay, okay, I just needed that context.
Speaker 1: All right, let's keep going.
Speaker 2: She's like, for whatever reason, by the way, this girl's fish.
Speaker 3: So I was really surprised when the next day that
Speaker 3: we're hanging out, I say this funny thing, just joke
Speaker 3: about the F word, and he was like what And
Speaker 3: I'm like, you know, I'm chance right, and he was
Speaker 3: taken aback. Anyways, I first he was not about it,
Speaker 3: but then for some reason he was like, look, I
Speaker 3: see you as the person. I really like it. I
Speaker 3: want to get to tell you. Let's keep going and
Speaker 3: that short story, long, long story, short, we're still talking.
Speaker 3: He left because he was here in pr for a vacation,
Speaker 3: and he he left back to his home in Indiana,
Speaker 3: middle of bumps up with bumps? Can I swear here
Speaker 3: in the middle of nowhere Indiana?
Speaker 6: Famous this car?
Speaker 3: I'm calling from my car anyways in Apane, Indiana, And yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm just calling because I don't know what to do.
Speaker 3: Like he lives in a place that I have, you know,
Speaker 3: at least in Georgia. I have family over there and
Speaker 3: I visit. I don't have anybody in Indiana, and I
Speaker 3: have my work here at home, and I don't I
Speaker 3: don't think I can change that. And like I'm doing
Speaker 3: really good and I don't know, like should I keep
Speaker 3: involving myself emotionally with this person?
Speaker 1: Fuck him?
Speaker 2: So he said something about faggot. He said something about.
Speaker 1: Oh oh, I thought she said something about faggot, And
Speaker 1: he was like, what are you allowed to say that?
Speaker 1: I don't know, Maybe that was what I Okay, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: he was like he was like the woke police, like
Speaker 1: the okay, so he was not like homophobic, he was.
Speaker 2: Being he was being justin long and barbarian. What a faggot?
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, uh, I mean yeah, he lives far like.
Speaker 2: I was, in the most boring place in Africa.
Speaker 1: Who cares. Yeah, like I would, I definitely wouldn't like
Speaker 1: travel to go, like hell now to go even like
Speaker 1: maybe have sex with this guy.
Speaker 2: He better come to Puerto Rico. But going to Indiana
Speaker 2: out of the question.
Speaker 1: Yeah, if he came to you that maybe, yeah, that
Speaker 1: might be something. But I mean, girl, let's be fucking
Speaker 1: for real. There's also the chance that, like you hook
Speaker 1: up with him, he likes it and he's like, all right,
Speaker 1: I have to kill you and myself right now, like
Speaker 1: that clastic love story, Like I mean, that is something
Speaker 1: that fucking happens, Like I mean, I don't know, like
Speaker 1: that's what This has always been the least biphobic podcast,
Speaker 1: probably the only biphobic or anti biphobia podcast in the world,
Speaker 1: because bisexual men, I guess bisexual women too to a degree,
Speaker 1: are always going.
Speaker 5: To be like the chillest about like hooking up.
Speaker 2: Having having out, having to disclose your trans identity to
Speaker 2: a bisexual person.
Speaker 1: No fear baby, Yeah, it doesn't matter. Yeah, because they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I like everything, just like.
Speaker 2: Jonathan van Ness complains about being miss gendered and he
Speaker 2: uses all pronouns.
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter. It's just it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: If you he, she and they, then what are you
Speaker 1: getting mad about?
Speaker 7: Then?
Speaker 4: What is that?
Speaker 5: What are we doing?
Speaker 2: Sorry? I just took us down a littlerabbit hole there, So.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't I don't know.
Speaker 1: It's it doesn't really doesn't know like what to advise. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like it doesn't seem like I feel like you know
Speaker 1: the answer. I don't think you're gonna like put your
Speaker 1: life on pause to.
Speaker 2: Get it doesn't sound like you're exactly yearning. I know
Speaker 2: this girl, it's a lot.
Speaker 4: Hey.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe he's in Indiana, like downloading like Grinder and
Speaker 1: Sniffies and trying to look around for for his own
Speaker 1: little Puerto Rican TRANSSEXUALI Deiana. Yeah, so good good luck
Speaker 1: to him.
Speaker 2: I hear that they're everywhere out there.
Speaker 5: Oh where else would they be?
Speaker 2: I mean, but now, Victoria, you are so sexy, so fear,
Speaker 2: so fine, so fabulous. You you can just get it
Speaker 2: wherever you want it. Girl, fuck that guy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree, I agree, and you should and.
Speaker 2: Uh yeah you should. But call us next week, because
Speaker 2: call us this week because we need your calls for
Speaker 2: next week.
Speaker 1: So we need your calls and you can send them
Speaker 1: to six seven eight five six one two seven eight
Speaker 1: five that is six seven eight five six one two
Speaker 1: seven eight five or whatever problems you have, we can
Speaker 1: make them worse or better.
Speaker 2: Just depends on how we're feeling that day.
Speaker 1: Depends on Yeah, it depends. I think I like our
Speaker 1: strategy of giving like one joke advice and then one
Speaker 1: genuine advice. Yeah, I feel like, because then you can
Speaker 1: kind of choose your own adventure.
Speaker 2: There you go. It's a binary choice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you can choose to make your life better or
Speaker 1: choose to do the funniest thing possible. And you know
Speaker 1: which one which way? Transsexual wis one closeted bisexual Indiana
Speaker 1: and man, Well, thanks so.
Speaker 2: Much for tuning into this week's episode.
Speaker 1: And yeah, thank you guys.
Speaker 2: Next week join us because we will be talking to
Speaker 2: the wonderful Liz Perschelle. We'll be talking to her about
Speaker 2: her career as a queer film historian.
Speaker 1: So yeah, we got a big movie episode, a lot
Speaker 1: of good movie recks, a lot of good movie talks,
Speaker 1: and it's all it's all gay stuff, so you know
Speaker 1: it all it all fits in line with the modus
Speaker 1: operandi of the show.
Speaker 2: So so just like this week, bring your popcorn and
Speaker 2: lots of better bring.
Speaker 1: The popcorn bag. Yeah cool. You know well, Thank you guys,
Speaker 1: and we'll see.
Speaker 2: You next week. Stay beautiful, Bye bye bye, Thank you
Speaker 2: for listening to Beauty Translated. Beauty Translated is hosted by
Speaker 2: me Carmen Laurent and Janie Danger, produced by Kirk Garen
Speaker 2: and Jess. Special thanks to Ali Perry and Ali Cantor.
Speaker 2: The music by Aaron Kaufman. Beauty Translated is proud to
Speaker 2: be part of the Outspoken network from iHeart Podcasts. For
Speaker 2: more iHeart podcasts, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
Speaker 2: wherever you get your podcasts. Stay Beautiful, wa