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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are

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Speaker 1: the founding hosts of Okay Storytime Podcast.

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Speaker 2: And we have some foundational stories coming up for you.

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Speaker 1: But the thing is this foundation needs a little support

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Speaker 1: from these sponsors. So stick around two minutes and we'll

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Speaker 1: get into the episode.

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Speaker 3: My sister wouldn't let my daughter be a flower girl.

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Speaker 3: I'll never talk to her again.

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Speaker 4: You gotta stand up for your daughter.

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Speaker 3: Throw those flowers out there. Yeah yeah, So, I twenty

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Speaker 3: eight female, have a sister, twenty six female, who got

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Speaker 3: married last month. I'm gonna be blunt. My sister has

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Speaker 3: always been one of those people that has to have

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Speaker 3: everything perfect, to the point sometimes it was hard to

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Speaker 3: be around her. But she was my little sister and

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Speaker 3: I have no other siblings, so I've always made excuses

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Speaker 3: when she'd hurt me when I was doing the right

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Speaker 3: things in her eyes. By the way, this comes from

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Speaker 3: user Otro on the ar slash Okay Storytime subord it.

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Speaker 3: So I was kind of nervous when she asked me

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Speaker 3: and my daughter for to be bridesmaids in February because

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Speaker 3: I knew she was going to be a massive bridezilla.

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Speaker 4: Sound a good sign? I feel like oh, I already no.

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Speaker 3: Like Honey Dewey, do we really want to be part

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Speaker 3: of Auntie's wedding.

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Speaker 4: I don't think we want to do that.

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Speaker 3: Over the last few months, we've had to practice multiple dances,

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Speaker 3: pay for very expensive dresses, and put up with her tantrums.

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Speaker 3: I told her from the start if she was anyway

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Speaker 3: nasty to my child, I wouldn't stand for it. She

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Speaker 3: assured me she'd never be nasty towards her. Again, this

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Speaker 3: is her favorite person in the whole world.

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Speaker 4: Foreshadowing hmm.

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Speaker 3: Well, now her husband's little cousin eightish, I think, started

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Speaker 3: coming to dance practice with her mom, and my sister

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Speaker 3: started to ask her to do little things like show

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Speaker 3: my daughter how to throw the pedals. I honestly thought

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Speaker 3: she'd make them both flower girls for a while, But

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Speaker 3: when she started to make my daughter sit out and

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Speaker 3: have the little girl do with her poem, I knew

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Speaker 3: what was gonna happen, but I prayed.

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Speaker 4: I was ring. Oh Pie's daughters get getting recast that stuff.

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Speaker 3: You're getting recasted, girl, Sorry, you just didn't fit the part.

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Speaker 4: You didn't just didn't cut it.

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Speaker 3: You didn't make the cut.

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Speaker 4: Not everyone's cut. Out for this kind of business.

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Speaker 3: I invited her out to a coffee a few weeks

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Speaker 3: before the wedding and asked her what was going on.

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Speaker 3: She told me she was glad I brought it up

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Speaker 3: because she was looking for the right time. Apparently my

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Speaker 3: four year old wasn't doing everything right and she was

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Speaker 3: afraid she was gonna mess up her vision by saying

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Speaker 3: the wrong thing or not doing the dance right on

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Speaker 3: the day.

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Speaker 4: She's four.

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Speaker 3: She's four years old.

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Speaker 4: She's not gonna do it perfectly. That's not why you

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Speaker 4: have a flower girl.

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Speaker 3: It's not supposed to be perfect. I mean, yes, I

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Speaker 3: know you want your day to be perfect, but.

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Speaker 4: It supposed to be a little four year old being cute.

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Speaker 2: It's so cute.

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Speaker 3: If they mess up, it's cute, it's cute. It's not

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Speaker 3: gonna This is not like make or break wedding.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I told her she was doing a pretty good

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Speaker 3: job and everyone was always praising her. Sister giggled and said,

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Speaker 3: it's not their day now, is it?

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Speaker 4: Oh my god? I can just imagine her going, it's

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Speaker 4: not thir day now.

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Speaker 3: If it's not their day, So it's not up to us.

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Speaker 3: What's good enough for her wedding. I asked her straight up,

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Speaker 3: did she think her niece wasn't good enough to be

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Speaker 3: in her wedding. She replied with not as oh say.

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Speaker 3: He replied with not as something big as a flower girl.

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Speaker 3: But to attend, that's like the flowerl is like the

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Speaker 3: easiest part.

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Speaker 4: They just throw flowers grow.

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Speaker 3: Dude again, When the little kids run around and they

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Speaker 3: screw up, it's so cute, it's gotta happen. It makes

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Speaker 3: everyone go, oh yeah, gross. I hate how he did that.

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Speaker 3: I asked her how I was going to break it

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Speaker 3: to my daughter, who's so excited about being in the wedding.

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Speaker 3: She just told me to figure it out.

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Speaker 4: Your sister sucks.

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Speaker 3: I told her I'd give her a day to rethink

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Speaker 3: her decision. If not, we wouldn't be attending. Not speaking

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Speaker 3: to her ever again, then left, Yeah, put.

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Speaker 4: Your foot down, don't let her walk all over your daughter.

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Speaker 3: Well, two days went by, so I couldn't put it

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Speaker 3: off any longer. I broke the news to my child.

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Speaker 3: Even though I tried my hardest and sugarcoated as much

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Speaker 3: as possible, the news still broke her heart. She cried

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Speaker 3: herself to sleep, so did I and my husband.

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Speaker 4: Ah, that's so sad. She was looking forward to being

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Speaker 4: the flower girl and she just had her dreams ripped

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Speaker 4: from her.

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Speaker 3: That's so sad and dambuse your sister suck. Well. After

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Speaker 3: a week when I was a no show for anything,

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Speaker 3: my sister started to panic and started to get everyone

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Speaker 3: to talk to me, even drop off gifts for my daughter.

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Speaker 3: When I told them why, a good number of our family,

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Speaker 3: including bridesmaids, dropped out.

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Speaker 4: Yes, this is they're standing on business to you know,

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Speaker 4: hurt your daughter.

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Speaker 3: No, it's a four year old sister. For freak's sake. Man.

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Speaker 3: We ended up going for a few weeks away with

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Speaker 3: no phones. When we came back, my sister had sent

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Speaker 3: me multiple letters and emails apologizing. Her in laws and

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Speaker 3: husband had called me an a hole for doing what

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Speaker 3: I did. Edit brother in law saw this post and

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Speaker 3: told my sister, who cried reading all your comments. How

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Speaker 3: do I know? Because they showed up at my job

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Speaker 3: knowing I wouldn't want a scene. They begged me to

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Speaker 3: delete the post before people they know see it, and

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Speaker 3: kept apologizing. Finally, my sister said she might be pregnant.

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Speaker 4: I don't care. I literally don't worry.

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Speaker 3: When your daughter or son whoever wants to be the

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Speaker 3: ring bearer for I don't know. You already have a husband,

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Speaker 3: so it's not gonna work. Never mind cut that out.

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Speaker 4: But you.

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Speaker 3: Don't deserve it, I said. Even if she is pregnancy

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Speaker 3: doesn't wash away all the crappy things she's done. And

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Speaker 3: I hope her husband's siblings never treat her child the

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Speaker 3: way she treated mine because I don't plan to be

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Speaker 3: a part of her life.

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Speaker 4: Damn. Yeah, well, I mean her sister was pretty nasty.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and she do doesn't seem like it. It's not

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Speaker 3: their day. She burst it into tears, saying she was

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Speaker 3: sorry and she loves my daughter. I told her to

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Speaker 3: leave before I called security, and her husband tried to

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Speaker 3: talk to me alone because I was making her so

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Speaker 3: upset and everyone was cold towards them because of me.

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Speaker 3: I told them, no, everyone was cold because Cinderella and

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Speaker 3: Prince Charming forgot that they were treating everyone like crap,

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Speaker 3: that no one wanted to be in their happy ever After,

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Speaker 3: they didn't like my mocking tone and raise their voices

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Speaker 3: at me, my boss told them to leave. Who knows

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Speaker 3: the situation and has a five year old herself? So

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Speaker 3: she's on my side everyone.

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Speaker 4: Because kind of crazy. If your boss was like, no,

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Speaker 4: I'm kind of signing with your sister who I've never

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Speaker 4: met before.

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Speaker 3: No, I was gonna say, I think everyone's on your side. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: there's no one other than that.

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Speaker 4: I mean, she bullied a four year old.

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Speaker 3: She bullied a four four year old, made a four

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Speaker 3: year old cry. She just ruined her because every little

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Speaker 3: girls like I want to be the flower girl.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and then everyone dropped out of her wedding.

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Speaker 3: It's on her, that's what you get. My sister's mother

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Speaker 3: in law reached out to my parents asking for everyone

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Speaker 3: to meet up on neutral terms so we can all

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Speaker 3: work out our differences. I'm gonna go to this dinner

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Speaker 3: party because I want to hear their story and officially

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Speaker 3: tell them leave me alone. I will update you guys

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Speaker 3: important at it. Ooh, my sister's photographer saw this post

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Speaker 3: and reached out to me on here.

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Speaker 4: How was everyone finding this post?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, this mst be a really small town or again,

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Speaker 3: everyone just spread the post. She knew my full name

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Speaker 3: and she gave me her Instagram to confirm. This goes

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Speaker 3: deeper than my daughter not dancing. Apparently she overheard my

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Speaker 3: sister's mother in law and aunt in law talking in

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Speaker 3: the bathroom. They use slurs against my daughter and husband.

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Speaker 4: Oh it's racism. Ah, there it is.

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Speaker 3: I guess it's all excuse now, all's good.

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Speaker 4: Oh that's why she didn't want the freaking four year

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Speaker 4: old in her wedding because she was a racist. I

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Speaker 4: hate her literally, never talked to her again.

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Speaker 3: They called me the black man's.

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Speaker 4: Or your sister is the devil that was.

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Speaker 3: The sister didn't say that. Oh, this was the mother

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Speaker 3: in law and the in law so, oh my god.

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Speaker 3: The brother in law or brother in law, the new

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Speaker 3: husband yeahah, family said this.

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Speaker 4: Well, I wonder if they like they were the ones

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Speaker 4: who were trying to like say, oh, we don't want

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Speaker 4: her to be the flower girl. Yeah, which still makes

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Speaker 4: the sister that's the worst.

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Speaker 3: The worst. The photographer said they were both wasted. But

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Speaker 3: brother in law also made jokes around my sister earlier

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Speaker 3: in the day, which she smiled at.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, disgusting.

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Speaker 3: She also thinks my family members heard it and it's

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Speaker 3: the reason they dropped.

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Speaker 4: That does make sense. I actually was kind of wondering

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Speaker 4: because I was like, oh, it doesn't I don't know

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Speaker 4: if it necessarily makes sense for people to drop out

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Speaker 4: because a four year old can't beat the flower. But

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Speaker 4: this makes a lot.

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Speaker 3: More, it makes more sense. Still still crappy human beings.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, my daughter wasn't a flower girl because unlike me,

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Speaker 3: her aunt or the other flower girl, she doesn't have

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Speaker 3: blue eyes and blonde hair.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you're this This family sucks.

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Speaker 3: If you're reading this, Sarah and Frank, if you and

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Speaker 3: your family, my child is too good to be around

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Speaker 3: trash like you, Yes, both stay the f away from us.

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Speaker 3: And if anyone died, my family knew the real story

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Speaker 3: and didn't tell me. Af you two m Edit number four.

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Speaker 3: Thanks everyone for the love and support, but especially thank

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Speaker 3: you to the photographer who came forward. Thank you so

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Speaker 3: much for bringing this to my attention before I let

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Speaker 3: them back into our lives. You're a real one. Edit five.

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Speaker 3: So I thought i'd answer a lot of questions that

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Speaker 3: kept getting asked because I'm tired and we'll be going

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Speaker 3: to bed soon. My parents are fully on my side,

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Speaker 3: so are multiple other family members. The ones that aren't

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Speaker 3: have been cut off. My daughter doesn't know the full story,

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Speaker 3: but as a treat for all of us. We plan

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Speaker 3: to take her to Disneyland for Christmas. As for my sister,

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Speaker 3: some people have mentioned she might be in an abusive relationship. Well,

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Speaker 3: her husband is from old money and his family is

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Speaker 3: very well connected in England, which is something she always wanted.

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Speaker 3: So I don't know if she is in a bad

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Speaker 3: relationship and afraid it's up to my husband to forgive her,

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Speaker 3: not me. I don't know if anyone should be forgiving her.

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Speaker 4: But we're not looking for forgiveness. We're just looking for

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Speaker 4: you guys to join us live every weekday at three

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Speaker 4: PMPST on YouTube.

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Speaker 3: Just top our profile, step her profile. My brain went,

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Speaker 3: did you see v Just go per?

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Speaker 4: That was a hard one.

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Speaker 3: There's another relevant update and looks like we're continuing of

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Speaker 3: the list back to the story again, so this edit.

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Speaker 3: You can post this wherever you like. Please don't message

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Speaker 3: me again, and I will not give up the photographer's

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Speaker 3: information because she wants to stay anonymous. Another point, I

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Speaker 3: found out three family members knew, including a bridesmaid that

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Speaker 3: dropped out new. I found out three family members.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I found a messed up that they didn't say anything.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I found out three family members knew, including a

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Speaker 3: bridesmaid that dropped out new Okay, I've seen a lot

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Speaker 3: of people making fun of the fact me and my

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Speaker 3: husband cried ourselves to sleep that night. My daughter found out.

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Speaker 4: What like, you're just like your parents and you're seeing

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Speaker 4: your child's you know, seeing your.

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Speaker 3: Child said really sad, said it made me sad, So sad?

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Speaker 3: Have it made you guys?

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Speaker 4: Sad means they made you guys out put in the chat.

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Speaker 3: We didn't cry about her not being a flower girl,

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Speaker 3: nor did we cry while she was awake. We cried

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Speaker 3: because our child was extremely hurt. And there's no worse

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Speaker 3: feeling than your child thinking they're not good enough for

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Speaker 3: someone they love.

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Speaker 2: Ah.

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Speaker 4: I hate this sister.

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Speaker 3: I hate the sister for the commenter who was extremely

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Speaker 3: nasty about my husband crying. A father's love is equal

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Speaker 3: to a mother's. Men do and are allowed to have emotions.

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Speaker 3: Just do better, h hot take men have emotions. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I have cried before.

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Speaker 4: Men cry more men.

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Speaker 2: You know what.

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Speaker 4: I talked to a lot of men and they're like,

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Speaker 4: I haven't cried in months, and I'm like, I cried yesterday.

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Speaker 3: She's being real, she did cry yesterday. Here's a joy.

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Speaker 4: Why did I cry.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, I didn't mean.

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Speaker 4: I didn't actually cry yesterday.

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Speaker 3: But I guarantee you the commenture was a man, Yeah,

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Speaker 3: was a man.

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Speaker 4: My grandfather is a cheater and a hypocrite, so I

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Speaker 4: told him off at the family dinner.

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Speaker 3: MM throw some potatoes out of that one.

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Speaker 4: Start some tea, start some drama.

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Speaker 3: Get some tea ready, throw it at him.

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Speaker 4: Hi, I have a bit of a situation that includes

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Speaker 4: some family drama and would like some comments on the situation. Also,

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Speaker 4: this history includes some unhinched people, cheating, screaming, and year's

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Speaker 4: worth of lies. So I, twenty four female, recently got

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Speaker 4: into a bit of a fight with my grandpa's sixty

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Speaker 4: seven male. For context, Grandpa cheated on Grandma during the

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Speaker 4: time I was born. Then one day he just packed

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Speaker 4: some of his things told Grahama I was over because

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Speaker 4: he fell in love with his affair partner fifty nine

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Speaker 4: female and left her the house and their four kids.

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Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from Cactus in the Making

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Speaker 4: on the Okay storytime subvert it. So he came back

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Speaker 4: a few months later sad and penniless.

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Speaker 3: That's what you get, old man Karma.

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Speaker 4: A fair partner left him because he ran out of money.

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Speaker 4: Grandma let him back in, and not even six months later,

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Speaker 4: he cheated with a fair partner again, this time for

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Speaker 4: good Grandma.

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Speaker 3: Why the worst Grandma or cloud for the old man

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Speaker 3: by old man.

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Speaker 4: I was one year old at the time, so obviously

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Speaker 4: this comes from what family told me, But basically, there

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Speaker 4: was a lot of drama and Grandma ended up depressed,

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Speaker 4: no money, no house. The landlord was a friend of

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Speaker 4: Grandpa and kicked her out.

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Speaker 3: I hate this story.

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Speaker 4: It sucks. That is really so messed up. With three

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Speaker 4: kids that were barely adults and a minor, the family

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Speaker 4: ended up divided, with two of the kids leaving my

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Speaker 4: grandma alone because of her depression, and my mom and

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Speaker 4: aunt staying with her. So on to the recent events,

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Speaker 4: Grandpa hasn't been very involved in my life because I

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Speaker 4: naturally don't like a fair partner. My reasons do include

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Speaker 4: the cheating part, but I didn't like her even before

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Speaker 4: I knew all the things that went down, so it's

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Speaker 4: a factor not the whole reason. I rarely see him,

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Speaker 4: and after almost six years of putting the effort to

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Speaker 4: keep my relationship with him, I gave up because it

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Speaker 4: actually hurt me. Yes, I did talk about this with

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Speaker 4: my therapist and I'm currently doing okay. Two weeks ago,

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Speaker 4: he invited my family mom, dad, sis, bro, myself over

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Speaker 4: for dinner, and over meal, the topic of morals comes up.

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Speaker 4: This must go well, it's probably got lots to say

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Speaker 4: about morals, like, I'm a.

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Speaker 3: Terrific guy, I know everything about morals.

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Speaker 4: Grandpa starts bad mouthing my aunt's ex, saying he's a

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Speaker 4: dead beat, He's not, and whatnot. Eventually he says that

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Speaker 4: the guy has no morals or concepts of family, and

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Speaker 4: I snapped, Look, I don't even know why, but I

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Speaker 4: unloaded everything I told him. Someone who cheated and abandoned

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Speaker 4: his wife not once, but twice shouldn't be talking about

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Speaker 4: morals or family.

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Speaker 3: Let's go op, yes, that.

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Speaker 4: He was the deadbeat who left his wife and kids

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Speaker 4: to fend for themselves and now has the audacity to

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Speaker 4: criticize a man that actually cares about his daughter. A

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Speaker 4: fair part said something about how I was acting crazy again.

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Speaker 3: Oh no, doy, it's the affair partner freaking.

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Speaker 4: A fair partner. She thinks I'm mentally unstable because I

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Speaker 4: have anxiety and depression, even though I haven't needed any

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Speaker 4: medication for over a year and I'm doing pretty well,

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Speaker 4: Thank you very much.

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Speaker 3: Let's go.

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Speaker 4: Also, I mean, who cares what she thinks. She's a

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Speaker 4: freaking affair, Like she got with a married man.

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Speaker 3: And she used for his money. Yeah, and was like, oh,

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Speaker 3: I used you for you.

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Speaker 4: I don't think you have to feel you know, too bad?

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Speaker 4: Whatever she says. Yeah, I went off on her about

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Speaker 4: how she should never talk about being crazy after threatening

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Speaker 4: a female coworker of my grandfather's with a hammer because

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Speaker 4: they spent time together at work. Yes, this happened. Opie's

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Speaker 4: like not holding anything back and I love it.

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Speaker 3: Let it all out.

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Speaker 4: Grandpa chimed in, saying she was just worried, as she

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Speaker 4: is for anybody who has a mental health problem. So

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Speaker 4: at this point I screamed at him that none of

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Speaker 4: them cared when it was my grandmother and the depression

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Speaker 4: and mental breakdown they caught.

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Speaker 3: I was literally about to bring it up, like you

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Speaker 3: don't care, you're an advocate for mental health health. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: you caused it to one of the most important people

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Speaker 3: in everyone's lives right now.

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Speaker 4: Literally, And the only reason that they're bringing up, oh,

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Speaker 4: we just care is because Opie's call them out. I

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Speaker 4: stormed off and the next day went to Grandma's. She

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Speaker 4: said it was fine if I exploded that I've been

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Speaker 4: holding things for the sake of family peace and it

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Speaker 4: wasn't good for me, not mentally nor emotionally. Dad says

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Speaker 4: Grandpa brought this upon himself. Mom is furious and said

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Speaker 4: it wasn't my place to talk like that to her

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Speaker 4: dad or to bring up past events. Bro is super young,

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Speaker 4: so he didn't care, and Sis is very much on

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Speaker 4: my side with you play stupid games, you win stupid prizes. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: I think is it petty? Sure? Justified? Absolutely?

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Speaker 3: Absolutely.

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Speaker 4: Grandpa reached out today to give some half buddied apology

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Speaker 4: and asked for one. I blatantly told him I have

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Speaker 4: nothing to be sorry about and he should keep his

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Speaker 4: mouth shut about certain topics. Mom is now giving me

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Speaker 4: the silent treatment, and Dad told me I went too far,

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Speaker 4: but understands. I think also the dads probably like, yeah,

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Speaker 4: you went too far. I totally get them. Well, no,

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Speaker 4: because he's like, okay, I can't wink well, but.

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Speaker 3: He's like yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 4: But I think he's trying to, you know, smooth things

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Speaker 4: out with Opie's mom and try and not get agrees

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Speaker 4: with op.

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Speaker 3: That's what I feel like, Like your grandma's your grandpa

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Speaker 3: freakings walks.

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Speaker 4: The rest of the family is divided, and my uncle

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Speaker 4: actually came to my house to discuss my lack of respect.

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Speaker 3: This is what I think. This is one of the

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Speaker 3: uncles that ditch grandma for dad because Grandma wasn't in

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Speaker 3: the oppressive state. And yeah, uncle is like, I don't

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Speaker 3: like this, So am I the a.

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Speaker 4: Hole for unloading like that and not apologizing. I think

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Speaker 4: that you were rolling in a lot of stuff and

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Speaker 4: your grandpa was running his mouth. Again, it's it's never

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Speaker 4: the best idea to unload in front of a big

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Speaker 4: group of people when you could have a conversation one

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Speaker 4: on one. But I don't think that you're necessarily like

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Speaker 4: I think you're justified in your ale is.

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Speaker 3: Justified pettiness again, this I feel like this story, it's

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Speaker 3: just a icky story that maybe you've seen your grandma's like,

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Speaker 3: it's okay, it's.

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Speaker 4: Okay, we're standing up for your grandma.

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00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:06,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, and your mom and your aunt decided with your grandma,

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Speaker 3: which is weird.

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Speaker 4: Edit to add thanks for responding. First of all, I

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00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:12,719
Speaker 4: have to clarify that Mom does have a problem when

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Speaker 4: it comes to the males in her family. She will

401
00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:18,199
Speaker 4: justify anything they do and it's terrible, which is probably

402
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Speaker 4: because she has her father, who's you know, acted terribly

403
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Speaker 4: her whole childhood. I think gotten away with it.

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Speaker 3: Not to mention it again, but I think it stems

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Speaker 3: from her mom, who got cheated on and she was

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Speaker 3: like letting back, let it back in.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, she was actually getting better with therapy, but due

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Speaker 4: to money issues, we can't afford it anymore. So there's that.

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Speaker 4: I also want to explain the extent to this problem,

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Speaker 4: and I'll do it with one single example. Grandpa is

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Speaker 4: unapologetic about the cheating. He even denies it and has

412
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:49,560
Speaker 4: made up a whole story about him and how he

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00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:52,520
Speaker 4: and the affair partner met on the street, even if

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00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,960
Speaker 4: we all know the truth, and Mom, instead of telling

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00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,879
Speaker 4: me the truth, chose to keep this from me until

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00:17:56,880 --> 00:17:59,280
Speaker 4: I was around ten years old and was angry that

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Speaker 4: Grandma wouldn't come to my birthday. I don't know what happened.

418
00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:04,320
Speaker 4: Mom made it seem like they broke up and Grandma

419
00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:06,800
Speaker 4: went absolutely nuts for no reason. I asked them to

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00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:09,000
Speaker 4: sleep over at Grandma's something that I still do to

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00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:10,840
Speaker 4: this day, and I asked her why she wouldn't come

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00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,760
Speaker 4: to my birthdays or any celebration. That's when she told

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Speaker 4: me the story, and I was furious with everyone except her.

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00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:20,520
Speaker 4: From then on, all of my cousins and siblings know

425
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:23,600
Speaker 4: the truth. It either comes from their parents or myself,

426
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:26,480
Speaker 4: because I'm sick and tired of Grandpa getting away with this.

427
00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:29,640
Speaker 4: But you won't get away with not joining us live

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00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:32,840
Speaker 4: every weekday three PMPSD on YouTube. You just have to

429
00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:33,800
Speaker 4: tap our profile.

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00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,399
Speaker 3: Just tap it and we won't leave you.

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00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:38,119
Speaker 4: And there is another edit to add information. But do

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Speaker 4: you have any final thoughts to the story?

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Speaker 2: Fee?

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00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:42,280
Speaker 3: It seems like this is just like a huge thing

435
00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,040
Speaker 3: that stems with this entire family, just.

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00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:47,440
Speaker 4: A lot of family secrets and trying to reckon with them.

437
00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:50,440
Speaker 4: And I think half of the grandpa's kids are like, oh,

438
00:18:50,440 --> 00:18:52,919
Speaker 4: we have to respect our elders and we have to

439
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:56,480
Speaker 4: respect our dad, even though he's shown disrespect to everyone

440
00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:58,000
Speaker 4: in the family time and time again.

441
00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:00,680
Speaker 3: It's just very gross. And I feel like maybe Mom

442
00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:04,000
Speaker 3: might be a little upset at Opee because Grandpa hasn't

443
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,360
Speaker 3: been called out. Yeah, we haven't heard anyone call out

444
00:19:06,359 --> 00:19:08,000
Speaker 3: Grandpa just yet, or like anyone.

445
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:09,959
Speaker 4: Scared of me. I think it's also so much generational,

446
00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:13,080
Speaker 4: and I think that you know, Ope's probably like, you

447
00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:14,560
Speaker 4: know what, I'm going to call people out if they're

448
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:18,639
Speaker 4: acting badly, and the opie's parents and uncles and aunts

449
00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:21,040
Speaker 4: and stuff are like, well, it's he's her dad, so

450
00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:22,880
Speaker 4: you know, it doesn't matter if he did.

451
00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:26,480
Speaker 3: Something passes of the past. Yeah, no, he did. Someone

452
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:31,160
Speaker 3: called our grandpa for his crappy behavior in the past

453
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:32,520
Speaker 3: and his scummy behavior.

454
00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:35,720
Speaker 4: Yeah. Another edit to add, Yes, the fair partner left

455
00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:37,679
Speaker 4: him when he ran out of money. She started going

456
00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:39,960
Speaker 4: out with three different guys that I know of, and

457
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:44,040
Speaker 4: convinced them to pay for rent, car insurance, health insurance, clothes,

458
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:47,440
Speaker 4: and several things from her family. Grandpa only came back

459
00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:49,800
Speaker 4: when he landed a big job. He rented a place

460
00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:52,600
Speaker 4: without anyone knowing, then called her and had her move in.

461
00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:55,520
Speaker 4: He left Grandma and his kids moved into the apartment

462
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,680
Speaker 4: with a fair partner, and she had to cut contact

463
00:19:57,680 --> 00:20:00,840
Speaker 4: with the other guys. Six years later, Grandpa found out

464
00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:02,919
Speaker 4: she was sort of dating someone else, so she was

465
00:20:02,920 --> 00:20:05,720
Speaker 4: friging to Karma man while he was working this well

466
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:08,160
Speaker 4: paying job. She begged for him to stay with her

467
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,160
Speaker 4: and gave him her phone so he could be sure

468
00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:12,640
Speaker 4: she wasn't doing anything. From then on, she's been nothing

469
00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:14,720
Speaker 4: short of a housewife, except for the fact that they're

470
00:20:14,760 --> 00:20:17,960
Speaker 4: not married because Grandpa never signed the papers Grandma sent

471
00:20:18,119 --> 00:20:20,920
Speaker 4: and after a certain time, Grandma just didn't care enough.

472
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:21,640
Speaker 3: I feel bad.

473
00:20:22,119 --> 00:20:24,399
Speaker 4: I feel so bad for this grandma. But that is

474
00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:27,840
Speaker 4: the end of that. Yeah, Unfortunately, that is the.

475
00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:29,359
Speaker 3: End that I taste in my mouth.

476
00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:30,920
Speaker 4: I am glad that it would be called out this

477
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,800
Speaker 4: grandpa because he freaking sucks. He's the worst.

478
00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:39,439
Speaker 2: My brother's fiance demanded I change my appearance for her wedding,

479
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:40,560
Speaker 2: and I.

480
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,560
Speaker 4: Refuse your put down. Don't let anyone tell you what

481
00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:44,040
Speaker 4: to do.

482
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:51,480
Speaker 2: It's my appearance, shut up. I twenty two female, am

483
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:54,640
Speaker 2: going to my sister in law's wedding twenty six female.

484
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:58,200
Speaker 2: So here's the situation. My sister in law is getting

485
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:02,080
Speaker 2: married in two months sixteenth. She has been in full

486
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:05,440
Speaker 2: and extra bridezilla mode for as long as I've known her.

487
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:07,719
Speaker 2: She's been a bit of a control freak and wanting

488
00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,840
Speaker 2: everything perfect. But this wedding brought out the worst of

489
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:17,040
Speaker 2: the worst of this woman. Ooh, Bridezilla. It's like Bridezilla zilla,

490
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:20,240
Speaker 2: Bridezilla one, Bridezilla squared.

491
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:23,360
Speaker 4: I was thinking, like, God's what no Bridezilla minus.

492
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:23,840
Speaker 2: One minus one.

493
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:24,640
Speaker 4: Yeah.

494
00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:27,600
Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from user chapter ok thirty

495
00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:31,080
Speaker 2: six seventy two on the r slash okay story time subreddit.

496
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:36,560
Speaker 2: So in December of twenty twenty two, the bride and

497
00:21:36,600 --> 00:21:39,600
Speaker 2: family started planning the wedding. My sister in law asked

498
00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:41,960
Speaker 2: me to be the maid of honor, and there's a

499
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:48,040
Speaker 2: total of five bridesmaids um oh K twenty eight, M

500
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:52,160
Speaker 2: twenty seven, L twenty six, A twenty six, N twenty six.

501
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:55,359
Speaker 2: Those are all gonna have to have names later, but

502
00:21:55,400 --> 00:22:00,359
Speaker 2: we'll we'll get to that later. For context, her and

503
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:03,480
Speaker 2: my brother twenty seven male, have been together since the

504
00:22:03,600 --> 00:22:06,480
Speaker 2: end of high school and dated all the way through college.

505
00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:08,920
Speaker 2: So she's been in my life for a long time

506
00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:11,080
Speaker 2: and has been there for me when I needed it.

507
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:14,600
Speaker 2: With me being her maid of honor, I've been trying

508
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:17,480
Speaker 2: to do my best managing college and to help with

509
00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:22,240
Speaker 2: all the preparations, I have rearranged my schedules for dress fittings,

510
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:27,160
Speaker 2: cake tasting, cake tasting, You taste the cake, and even

511
00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:30,440
Speaker 2: spending the entire weekend making centerpieces for the reception and

512
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:31,080
Speaker 2: the ceremony.

513
00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:34,280
Speaker 4: That's like a normal part of wedding planning. You get

514
00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:36,000
Speaker 4: cake tasting, You taste the cake. Yeah, you get like

515
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:40,280
Speaker 4: a bunch of different cake like samples. Anyone can do that, ridiculous.

516
00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:42,040
Speaker 4: You can go to a bakery and be like, I want,

517
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:44,320
Speaker 4: I want to do some cake tasting, and they'll give

518
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 4: you a whole sample.

519
00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:48,200
Speaker 2: Life acts. Yeah, freak unlimited. It's not free. It's not

520
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:53,159
Speaker 2: free if you've convince them. Even spent the whole weekend

521
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:56,720
Speaker 2: making centerpieces for the reception and the ceremony because the

522
00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:59,439
Speaker 2: ones she ordered quote, weren't good enough and up to

523
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:03,600
Speaker 2: her standard. I've been patient with her demanding orders and

524
00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:07,840
Speaker 2: changes that she wanted, but she just crossed a new line.

525
00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:10,200
Speaker 2: Last week, I got a phone call from my sister

526
00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:12,680
Speaker 2: in law asking to meet for coffee on the Monday

527
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:16,240
Speaker 2: at noon. At first I thought it was another wedding demand,

528
00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:19,520
Speaker 2: but heck to the no. When I got there, I

529
00:23:19,560 --> 00:23:22,320
Speaker 2: see her and her mom at the table. She told

530
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:24,480
Speaker 2: me her and her mother have some issues and are

531
00:23:24,520 --> 00:23:26,720
Speaker 2: worried about how I would look in the wedding photos

532
00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:32,119
Speaker 2: as well as at the wedding Dane. Both her and

533
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:33,919
Speaker 2: your mom were like, we think you're ugly.

534
00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:37,560
Speaker 4: Well, there's a problem with your appearance and it's gonna

535
00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:38,280
Speaker 4: ruin the wedding.

536
00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:40,720
Speaker 2: We straight up can't let your ugliness ruin our wedding.

537
00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:44,240
Speaker 2: And excuse me, that's rude.

538
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:46,040
Speaker 4: That's what they call rude.

539
00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:50,760
Speaker 2: Yeah. So for some context here, I'm a bit Gothic.

540
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:52,159
Speaker 2: Oh she's a goth.

541
00:23:52,359 --> 00:23:53,600
Speaker 4: She's a freaking god.

542
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:56,960
Speaker 2: Can't be goth. This is no goth wedding a wedding,

543
00:23:57,000 --> 00:24:00,320
Speaker 2: what are you talking about. I'm a bit goth thick

544
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:03,000
Speaker 2: and have always had my own unique style and look.

545
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:07,000
Speaker 2: I have vibrant, ashy hair with bright pink underneath, a

546
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:10,560
Speaker 2: few visible tattoos, and my nose and all my ears done.

547
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,560
Speaker 2: This is just who I am and I didn't expect

548
00:24:13,560 --> 00:24:16,320
Speaker 2: I would have to change for someone or anything, and

549
00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:17,120
Speaker 2: I will.

550
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:18,320
Speaker 4: Not don't at all.

551
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:22,439
Speaker 2: All my families support me and always have my back,

552
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:26,879
Speaker 2: or so I thought. My sister in law and her

553
00:24:26,920 --> 00:24:29,080
Speaker 2: mother both went on to say that she wanted me

554
00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:32,440
Speaker 2: to dye my hair neutral, cover up my tattoos, which

555
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:35,440
Speaker 2: are all sentimental to me and have meaning and value

556
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:38,159
Speaker 2: and for me to remove my piercinks.

557
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:41,000
Speaker 4: So just be a different person. Have we thought about that?

558
00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:43,200
Speaker 2: Can you just maybe not be you for today?

559
00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 4: Just for one day? It's not actually asking so much, no.

560
00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:49,879
Speaker 2: Key, we just hate you aesthetic change it for just

561
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:51,439
Speaker 2: one days?

562
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,879
Speaker 4: Supposed to get like that? I don't know, like like

563
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:57,320
Speaker 4: concealer foundation on all the tattoos.

564
00:24:57,440 --> 00:24:59,639
Speaker 2: I think there might be like a tactful way to

565
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:04,639
Speaker 2: bring the but definitely like it's like ganging up and shaming. Ope,

566
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:07,720
Speaker 2: like at a secret meeting is not the way to

567
00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:07,959
Speaker 2: do it.

568
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:08,359
Speaker 4: For sure.

569
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:15,280
Speaker 2: To say I was stun and jaw dropping embarrassed would

570
00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:20,760
Speaker 2: be understating. To say, the least finish it. I finished it.

571
00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:21,479
Speaker 4: You're welcome.

572
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:24,480
Speaker 2: She She then went to say that she did not

573
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:27,960
Speaker 2: want the bridesmaids or made of honor to look distracting.

574
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:30,719
Speaker 2: I turned around and said that I'm not changing how

575
00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 2: I look because it's who I am and how I

576
00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:36,400
Speaker 2: express myself. And I won't be changing anything for anyone

577
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:39,479
Speaker 2: because they don't like something on me. Her mother then

578
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:41,400
Speaker 2: went to say that she wants nothing but the best

579
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:43,920
Speaker 2: for her only daughter and wanting it to be perfect

580
00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:46,720
Speaker 2: and that if I didn't change my appearance, I would

581
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:51,560
Speaker 2: not be able to go to the wedding. I was livid.

582
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,640
Speaker 2: I was livid is an understatement.

583
00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:55,240
Speaker 4: You didn't you do that?

584
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:58,439
Speaker 2: You you did the that's the second half of the

585
00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:01,119
Speaker 2: thing you did earlier, of just the first half. Okay,

586
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:05,159
Speaker 2: I said I was leaving, and I got up and

587
00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:06,920
Speaker 2: left and did not pay for my bill.

588
00:26:07,520 --> 00:26:08,520
Speaker 4: They didn't pay for ice.

589
00:26:09,160 --> 00:26:11,240
Speaker 2: Once I got to my car, I started bawling my

590
00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:14,520
Speaker 2: eyes out and went straight to my brothers to confront

591
00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:19,280
Speaker 2: him about the situation. I explained to my brother that

592
00:26:19,359 --> 00:26:22,320
Speaker 2: I was upset and uncomfortable and embarrassed about what his

593
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:25,080
Speaker 2: fiance and his future mother in law had to say

594
00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:28,120
Speaker 2: to me. He said that this is their special day

595
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:30,920
Speaker 2: and to suck it up and move on. From then,

596
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:35,399
Speaker 2: I've just been seeing red and I went absolutely insane, saying,

597
00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:37,280
Speaker 2: how are you gonna let your soon to be wife

598
00:26:37,280 --> 00:26:39,760
Speaker 2: treat me this way? For context, me and my brother

599
00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:44,159
Speaker 2: have always been close growing up, even into adulthood. I

600
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,360
Speaker 2: just felt I wasn't valued enough. After I expressed my feelings,

601
00:26:47,920 --> 00:26:49,879
Speaker 2: I went home to cool down and didn't speak to

602
00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:54,880
Speaker 2: my brother, his partner, or her mother. I got over,

603
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:58,240
Speaker 2: I got a handful of phone calls and texts saying

604
00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:01,840
Speaker 2: all saying I was selfish and being petty. I am

605
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:06,240
Speaker 2: pretty and petty. I then phoned them asking them if

606
00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:08,160
Speaker 2: we could all meet up and talk about the situation,

607
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:11,000
Speaker 2: and they all agreed. We all talked and I explained

608
00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:13,359
Speaker 2: how I felt, saying that I wasn't comfortable changing how

609
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:16,040
Speaker 2: I looked, as it took me years to get how

610
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:18,679
Speaker 2: I wanted to look, as growing up I suffered with

611
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:22,119
Speaker 2: bullying and having severe anxiety about how I look and

612
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:25,760
Speaker 2: changing my appearance for one day, and that I thought

613
00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:28,359
Speaker 2: it was unreasonable and unfair for her and her mother

614
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:32,040
Speaker 2: to change how I look. She then got upset and

615
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:35,840
Speaker 2: started screaming and causing a scene, saying I was being

616
00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:39,760
Speaker 2: selfish and unreasonable and not taking her feelings into consideration

617
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:43,919
Speaker 2: because it's her special day and everyone should bow to

618
00:27:43,960 --> 00:27:46,800
Speaker 2: her knees. The mother then said I don't know the

619
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:49,879
Speaker 2: stress of planning a wedding and wanting everything to be perfect,

620
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:53,560
Speaker 2: and I replied that I may not know that, but

621
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:56,160
Speaker 2: I'm not changing my appearance because I like the way

622
00:27:56,200 --> 00:27:56,520
Speaker 2: I look.

623
00:27:56,800 --> 00:28:00,120
Speaker 4: It's all such a so unbelievably hurtful to be like, oh,

624
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:02,600
Speaker 4: I want everything to be perfect and you're not. Yeah,

625
00:28:02,840 --> 00:28:06,720
Speaker 4: You're something's wrong with you. Maybe, just like this is

626
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:09,840
Speaker 4: how I am. And if me just being me makes

627
00:28:09,840 --> 00:28:12,760
Speaker 4: your wedding not perfect, would I want to be there?

628
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:15,119
Speaker 4: Don't have me there because this is yeah, this is

629
00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:17,320
Speaker 4: this is how I look. Yeah, and if you have

630
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:19,399
Speaker 4: a problem with that, then you have a problem with me.

631
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:21,879
Speaker 2: Yeah. Just hire an actor who looks.

632
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,960
Speaker 4: Like me, and I like they can done double fake.

633
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:25,760
Speaker 2: Made of honor because you're already you already want a

634
00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:28,960
Speaker 2: fake made of honor. Sounds like we all got into

635
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,280
Speaker 2: a massive argument, and I left feeling more hurt and

636
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:35,920
Speaker 2: angry than when I went. I then texted my brother

637
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 2: and his fiance saying, I'm no longer attending the wedding

638
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 2: and do not want anything to do with the wedding,

639
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:43,280
Speaker 2: and I will be taking back all the things I

640
00:28:43,320 --> 00:28:46,320
Speaker 2: put my hard work into. Oh wow, she's like, I'm

641
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,920
Speaker 2: not going to the wedding, and neither of those centerpieces.

642
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 2: I'm ripping them all up.

643
00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:54,720
Speaker 4: They're gone. I'm putting them in my room. They're gonna

644
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 4: decorate my house, my center piece, They're gonna go with

645
00:28:57,240 --> 00:29:00,320
Speaker 4: my aesthetic, and you'll just have to deal. Yeah, if

646
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:01,640
Speaker 4: you're laying wedding.

647
00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:03,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, well you probably don't want these anyway, because a

648
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:10,240
Speaker 2: goth because a goth person made them. Before I texted this,

649
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:13,800
Speaker 2: I turned to my family and friends and my partner

650
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:16,520
Speaker 2: at the time and my bridesmaids. But they all say

651
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 2: that it's her special day and I should do what

652
00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:20,560
Speaker 2: they want and bend over backwards to make her happy.

653
00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:23,560
Speaker 2: My parents and partner think my sister in law is

654
00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:26,600
Speaker 2: being unreasonable, but my friends and the bridesmaids are split

655
00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:29,400
Speaker 2: and still fifty to fifty on the situation. Some say

656
00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:31,680
Speaker 2: she is being unreasonable and I should suck it up

657
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:34,000
Speaker 2: and get on with it for one day, while others

658
00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:36,840
Speaker 2: agree that she overstepped the threshold. And I do love

659
00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:39,920
Speaker 2: my sister in law, but she overstepped the boundaries and

660
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,440
Speaker 2: was asking way too much. I have so much guilt

661
00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:44,720
Speaker 2: for not being there for my brother, as me and

662
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:47,400
Speaker 2: him are so close and I just feel like we're

663
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:51,640
Speaker 2: we have drifted apart, and I feel awful. So am

664
00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:53,640
Speaker 2: I the a hole for not attending my sister in

665
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:57,240
Speaker 2: law's wedding If she insists I change my appearance and

666
00:29:57,280 --> 00:29:57,880
Speaker 2: we do.

667
00:29:57,720 --> 00:30:00,400
Speaker 4: Have an update? Oh man, I don't know. I think

668
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:03,880
Speaker 4: that there would have been a way where the sister

669
00:30:03,920 --> 00:30:06,080
Speaker 4: could have gotten her more in line with the aesthetic

670
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:07,920
Speaker 4: of the wedding if she had asked nicer, like she

671
00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:11,040
Speaker 4: could have been like, hey, like not talking like not

672
00:30:11,080 --> 00:30:13,080
Speaker 4: asking her to cover up the tattoos, but saying like, hey,

673
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:15,120
Speaker 4: can we wear this type of dress or can we

674
00:30:15,120 --> 00:30:18,320
Speaker 4: do this type style of makeup and stuff. It really

675
00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:20,280
Speaker 4: feels like there was a way for everybody to be

676
00:30:20,320 --> 00:30:23,480
Speaker 4: happy about this, yeah, and that it just was nowhere

677
00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:26,040
Speaker 4: close to executed. No, it's like there are some things

678
00:30:26,080 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 4: that you can't it's very hard to cover up, like

679
00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:32,240
Speaker 4: tattoos and her hair. Yeah.

680
00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:34,600
Speaker 2: And then the insult of being like and these are

681
00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:37,760
Speaker 2: all wrong. Yeah, everything about you is. Yeah, you're gonna

682
00:30:37,760 --> 00:30:39,960
Speaker 2: have to do some work if you want to be

683
00:30:40,160 --> 00:30:41,520
Speaker 2: in mom made of honor this wedding.

684
00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:43,440
Speaker 4: And then when Opie went to her brother and was like, hey,

685
00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:44,840
Speaker 4: this is these are my concerns, he was.

686
00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:46,840
Speaker 2: Like, suck it up, shuck it up, it's your wedding.

687
00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:47,280
Speaker 3: Yeah.

688
00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:50,280
Speaker 4: Uh, Miss staff and Strawberry says hot take, I don't

689
00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:52,240
Speaker 4: think that is too much to ask to tone it

690
00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:53,600
Speaker 4: down for the wedding, But I don't think OPI is

691
00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:56,200
Speaker 4: an a hole for not going either that again, I

692
00:30:56,240 --> 00:31:01,200
Speaker 4: think toning it down and what the fiance was asking,

693
00:31:01,280 --> 00:31:05,400
Speaker 4: we're pretty different because she was asking like completely covered tattoos. Yeah,

694
00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:06,320
Speaker 4: that was just loud.

695
00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:08,600
Speaker 2: There was probably a way to make everyone happy here,

696
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:10,560
Speaker 2: but they definitely didn't way to hit it.

697
00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:11,160
Speaker 4: Mm hmm.

698
00:31:11,640 --> 00:31:14,960
Speaker 2: All right, let's get into this update. I have decided

699
00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 2: to have one last conversation with my sister in law

700
00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:19,960
Speaker 2: and my brother. I approached them with a mix of

701
00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:23,920
Speaker 2: emotions and determination and vulnerability I had experienced, hoping that

702
00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:26,400
Speaker 2: my sister in law would understand how much her demands

703
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:30,080
Speaker 2: affected me before I delve into the crap show that happened.

704
00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:32,240
Speaker 2: Before I went to see them both, I had a

705
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:35,560
Speaker 2: separate conversation with my brother. He apologized to me, saying

706
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:38,200
Speaker 2: how deeply sorry he was and he shouldn't have taken

707
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:40,800
Speaker 2: his anger or stress out on me, and that his

708
00:31:40,880 --> 00:31:43,640
Speaker 2: fiance has been putting him through heck about this wedding

709
00:31:44,040 --> 00:31:45,400
Speaker 2: and it being perfect.

710
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:49,800
Speaker 4: At least he's apologizing, Yeah, that's something, taking accountability first step.

711
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:53,000
Speaker 2: In reality, it shouldn't have to be perfect and there

712
00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:55,120
Speaker 2: is no need for us to fight and fall out.

713
00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:57,560
Speaker 2: I explained to him that the way I look is

714
00:31:57,640 --> 00:32:00,000
Speaker 2: really important to me and is a part of my identity,

715
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:04,200
Speaker 2: and I didn't feel comfortable to change it. He said

716
00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:06,200
Speaker 2: he would have a conversation with his fiance.

717
00:32:06,440 --> 00:32:08,360
Speaker 4: I'm glad that he's like. It feels like maybe the

718
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:09,880
Speaker 4: brother was kind of caught up in all of the

719
00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:12,040
Speaker 4: wedding stress and wanting it to be you know, quote

720
00:32:12,120 --> 00:32:13,160
Speaker 4: unquote perfect first way.

721
00:32:13,120 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 2: And he's hearing all this other stuff too, and he

722
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:18,000
Speaker 2: can't you just please just take your piers down and

723
00:32:18,000 --> 00:32:19,320
Speaker 2: cover up your tatoos.

724
00:32:18,880 --> 00:32:20,479
Speaker 4: For me, please, And then he's like, you know what,

725
00:32:20,640 --> 00:32:23,280
Speaker 4: maybe I shouldn't have said that, because.

726
00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:27,960
Speaker 2: I know you, says I'm sorry, my man. Okay, on

727
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:31,120
Speaker 2: to me letting up with them. Like I explained to

728
00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:34,240
Speaker 2: my brother, I also explained to them that my appearance

729
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:36,920
Speaker 2: is who I am and alternating would make me feel

730
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:40,080
Speaker 2: like a stranger to myself. I pleaded with them for

731
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:42,480
Speaker 2: her to see me as her future sister in law

732
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:46,880
Speaker 2: and not just a potential disruption to her perfect wedding vision.

733
00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:50,480
Speaker 2: Sister in law, however, did not like the idea and

734
00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:54,240
Speaker 2: was unmoved, and even more doubled down, insisting that it's

735
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:56,480
Speaker 2: her wedding day and it's so important to her that

736
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:59,000
Speaker 2: I should be able to make this small sacrifice for

737
00:32:59,080 --> 00:33:03,120
Speaker 2: her happiness. She accused me of being selfish and disrespectful,

738
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:05,400
Speaker 2: saying that I don't really care about her and I

739
00:33:05,440 --> 00:33:09,000
Speaker 2: should just do as she asked. The conversation escalated into

740
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:12,640
Speaker 2: a heated argument. The sister in law accused me of

741
00:33:12,720 --> 00:33:16,800
Speaker 2: always seeking attention and making everything about myself. I countered

742
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:19,760
Speaker 2: that she was being unreasonable and controlling. In a fit

743
00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 2: of frustration, I told her that if she couldn't accept

744
00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:24,120
Speaker 2: me as I am, I wouldn't be attending the wedding

745
00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 2: at all. I stormed out, feeling a mix of anger

746
00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:29,520
Speaker 2: and heartbreak. Although I was still in the area, I

747
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:32,480
Speaker 2: could hear her and my brother arguing and shouting. He

748
00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:35,040
Speaker 2: then said that he no longer wants a wedding and

749
00:33:35,160 --> 00:33:38,120
Speaker 2: to be with someone who is so controlling and not

750
00:33:38,160 --> 00:33:40,960
Speaker 2: putting his family's interests and feelings first in this situation,

751
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:45,000
Speaker 2: and how he doesn't understand how and how she doesn't

752
00:33:45,040 --> 00:33:47,880
Speaker 2: understand how hurt I am, and he wouldn't let anyone

753
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:49,360
Speaker 2: get between him and his family.

754
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:54,000
Speaker 4: Wow, he what a switch up. He went from like

755
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:55,840
Speaker 4: just do it, like suck it up to like, you

756
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 4: know what.

757
00:33:56,600 --> 00:34:00,479
Speaker 2: Do's my I'm sorry, being like I'm sorry so and

758
00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 2: then being like.

759
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:06,240
Speaker 4: Business Belton has what I was thinking of. Why aren't

760
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:08,160
Speaker 4: either of them taking her out of the wedding party?

761
00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:10,960
Speaker 4: That's my question, Like why is she the maid of honor? Yeah,

762
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:12,600
Speaker 4: it's like they don't like each other.

763
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:15,720
Speaker 2: Something needs to be done here. But I have something

764
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:20,120
Speaker 2: that you guys can do every weekday. You can join

765
00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:22,320
Speaker 2: us live on YouTube at three pm PST.

766
00:34:23,360 --> 00:34:24,839
Speaker 4: Just tap our probid trap it.

767
00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:28,239
Speaker 2: Just tap it the little red circle. Just tap it.

768
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:32,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, man, I like the everyone's saying, dou w brother.

769
00:34:32,640 --> 00:34:33,040
Speaker 4: I agree.

770
00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 2: I think that I don't know. I mean, I think

771
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:38,480
Speaker 2: if I was the sister, I'd be a little more.

772
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:42,880
Speaker 4: I'd be like, oh no, I didn't.

773
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:45,440
Speaker 2: Mean to do a divorce. I wanted to keep my

774
00:34:45,520 --> 00:34:48,200
Speaker 2: piercings in just because it feels like it's a part

775
00:34:48,239 --> 00:34:48,400
Speaker 2: of me.

776
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:51,040
Speaker 4: M it does feel quick. It feels like they're I

777
00:34:51,080 --> 00:34:55,440
Speaker 4: don't know, But again, the sister was, you know, doubling

778
00:34:55,480 --> 00:34:57,440
Speaker 4: down on it and being kind of rude and stuff.

779
00:34:57,480 --> 00:34:59,080
Speaker 4: So I feel like there must have been other things

780
00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:00,080
Speaker 4: going on. I mean, I.

781
00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:05,000
Speaker 2: Kinda I don't know who said it in the comments,

782
00:35:05,040 --> 00:35:08,719
Speaker 2: but it's like, I do feel like there is a

783
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:12,320
Speaker 2: part of both parties that's being unreasonable here mm hmmm,

784
00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:16,640
Speaker 2: where it's like op is sort of being unreasonable for

785
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 2: not having any level of like all right, here's where

786
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:24,279
Speaker 2: I can budge on this. Yeah, and also like the

787
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:27,759
Speaker 2: sistern laws being unreasonable for being like this is the

788
00:35:27,760 --> 00:35:29,319
Speaker 2: way it is and this is the way it's going

789
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:32,680
Speaker 2: to be and there's no no, there's no as or

790
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:36,000
Speaker 2: bus about it, and it's creating this impasse where like

791
00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:39,719
Speaker 2: nobody is finding the solution that works for everybody, which

792
00:35:39,760 --> 00:35:41,960
Speaker 2: it's there. Yeah, it's so clear to me that there's

793
00:35:41,960 --> 00:35:43,080
Speaker 2: a solution here for everyone.

794
00:35:43,160 --> 00:35:45,239
Speaker 4: It does feel like everyone in the story is pretty impulsive.

795
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:50,799
Speaker 2: So he kicked her out, and thankfully most of our

796
00:35:50,840 --> 00:35:54,160
Speaker 2: family paid for the wedding. As surprise, surprise, the ex

797
00:35:54,239 --> 00:35:57,080
Speaker 2: sister in law's parents wouldn't put anything down for the wedding,

798
00:35:57,719 --> 00:35:59,759
Speaker 2: so we will get some of our money back. But

799
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:02,279
Speaker 2: now at all, me and my brother have now got

800
00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:04,840
Speaker 2: our relationship back to where it was, And he explained

801
00:36:04,840 --> 00:36:07,120
Speaker 2: and expressed how horrible he feels for not sticking up

802
00:36:07,120 --> 00:36:09,319
Speaker 2: for me earlier. I don't want to get into the

803
00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:11,920
Speaker 2: whole argument that happened between my brother and his ex

804
00:36:12,160 --> 00:36:14,920
Speaker 2: out of respect for his privacy, not my story to tell.

805
00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:17,839
Speaker 2: I hope you all understand. No, I'm upset. I want

806
00:36:17,840 --> 00:36:21,160
Speaker 2: to know the juices. Yes, I just again would like

807
00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:23,280
Speaker 2: to say thank you for all the support and advice

808
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:25,920
Speaker 2: I've been given. And that is the end of that story.

809
00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:30,040
Speaker 2: And it's and it sounded like she was fine with it,

810
00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:33,719
Speaker 2: which there's gotta be way more to that. Then that

811
00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 2: we are not privy to me, she.

812
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:37,160
Speaker 4: Said, I don't want to tell, but I feel like

813
00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:39,040
Speaker 4: there was definitely a lot more going on.

814
00:36:39,760 --> 00:36:42,239
Speaker 2: There's there's there's gotta be more. This that had to

815
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:44,000
Speaker 2: have been the breaking point of just like, you know what,

816
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:48,040
Speaker 2: you're really gonna be this militant about my sister's appearance.

817
00:36:48,440 --> 00:36:50,799
Speaker 2: I don't want to get married to you because you suck.

818
00:36:51,719 --> 00:36:54,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, And it was like, oh, I love my sister,

819
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:57,359
Speaker 4: then you can't love me. Oh dang, John.

820
00:36:57,400 --> 00:36:59,200
Speaker 2: Here we're gonna get back to this juicy story. But

821
00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:01,359
Speaker 2: a quick three of ass from our sponsors.

822
00:37:02,040 --> 00:37:04,919
Speaker 4: I'm charging my friend for her wedding cake, even though

823
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:08,440
Speaker 4: I promise to make it for free. Hmmm, sounds tricky.

824
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:11,959
Speaker 4: I thirty four female, have a friend who I'll call Mary,

825
00:37:12,080 --> 00:37:14,800
Speaker 4: thirty three female, who is getting married in two weeks.

826
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:17,600
Speaker 4: Mary's getting married marriage getting married. She and I have

827
00:37:17,719 --> 00:37:20,239
Speaker 4: been friends for several years, and I was excited when

828
00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:22,360
Speaker 4: she asked me if I could make her cake. I

829
00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 4: don't normally do cakes anymore for people outside of family

830
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:28,640
Speaker 4: and friends, as I'm currently pregnant, have a one year old,

831
00:37:28,760 --> 00:37:32,960
Speaker 4: and I'm currently pursuing another master's degree in education administration

832
00:37:33,480 --> 00:37:36,000
Speaker 4: so I can be a school principal. Wow, because teaching

833
00:37:36,080 --> 00:37:40,520
Speaker 4: is a dead end without an admin license. Unfortunately, the

834
00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:44,520
Speaker 4: administrators are where all the money's at in America. At

835
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:46,719
Speaker 4: the time when she asked, I was also teaching full

836
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:49,759
Speaker 4: time and finishing up a different master's program. So, yeah,

837
00:37:49,840 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 4: you totally have so much free time that you can

838
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:53,200
Speaker 4: make this cake with.

839
00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:54,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, why don't you just just.

840
00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:57,759
Speaker 4: Throw on like another cake? Find another person? Wore?

841
00:37:57,800 --> 00:38:01,480
Speaker 2: Do you also win? Astronaut? What do you the King

842
00:38:01,560 --> 00:38:02,200
Speaker 2: of Space?

843
00:38:02,719 --> 00:38:04,959
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from Cheese and Cake eighty

844
00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:08,680
Speaker 4: eight on the Okay Storytime suburned it, So I agreed

845
00:38:08,719 --> 00:38:11,600
Speaker 4: to make this cake over a year ago, I told

846
00:38:11,600 --> 00:38:13,400
Speaker 4: Mary when she offered a pay that I would do

847
00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:16,120
Speaker 4: it for free as my wedding gift to her. I

848
00:38:16,239 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 4: directly said wedding gift. She accepted, and we started planning

849
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:25,000
Speaker 4: the design. Mary wanted a four tier cake, with each

850
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:29,279
Speaker 4: tier a different flavor, white chocolate, yellow, and lemon, and

851
00:38:29,400 --> 00:38:33,040
Speaker 4: several sugar flowers and fonded decorations, as well as three

852
00:38:33,160 --> 00:38:36,160
Speaker 4: different flavored butter creams. It was a lot, but since

853
00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:39,160
Speaker 4: she's having an August wedding, I had time because school

854
00:38:39,160 --> 00:38:41,880
Speaker 4: would be out for summer and I'm actually taking a

855
00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:43,920
Speaker 4: year off since finding out I was pregnant a few

856
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:48,239
Speaker 4: months ago. No, I was going to derail us to

857
00:38:48,239 --> 00:38:50,560
Speaker 4: talk about cake flavors. I can't do it though.

858
00:38:51,239 --> 00:38:55,560
Speaker 2: I'm just a lot of how I'm doing it. How

859
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:58,719
Speaker 2: do we have vanilla and yellow? Aren't those the same flavors?

860
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:02,400
Speaker 2: What is yellow cake her flavored? Is that just cake flavored?

861
00:39:02,440 --> 00:39:06,560
Speaker 4: That is a great question. Like there's white, chocolate, yellow,

862
00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 4: and lemon.

863
00:39:07,120 --> 00:39:10,040
Speaker 2: That doesn't make any sense to me. Two of those

864
00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:17,280
Speaker 2: weren't flavors, Yeah, two just colors. Those just colors, Okay.

865
00:39:18,360 --> 00:39:21,880
Speaker 4: Saturday, I went to Mary's bachelorette party. The party itself

866
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:25,880
Speaker 4: was fine, nothing remarkable happened. I couldn't drink, but everyone

867
00:39:25,960 --> 00:39:30,600
Speaker 4: had fun. One of Mary's bridesmaids asked what we were

868
00:39:30,600 --> 00:39:33,239
Speaker 4: all getting her for her wedding. I said I was

869
00:39:33,239 --> 00:39:36,160
Speaker 4: making the cake for free. The bridesmaid and other girls

870
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:39,000
Speaker 4: there said that was a gift because cake cakes are

871
00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:42,320
Speaker 4: expensive and they wished they had gotten one for free.

872
00:39:42,680 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 4: That's it. I had heard nothing else about it until today.

873
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:50,480
Speaker 4: Mary texted me and asked why I wasn't getting her

874
00:39:50,520 --> 00:39:55,680
Speaker 4: wedding gift. And there we have it. Now I understand

875
00:39:55,719 --> 00:40:00,800
Speaker 4: the title that is so wedding cakes are very very expensive.

876
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:02,839
Speaker 2: We didn't need that.

877
00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:05,880
Speaker 4: Wedding cakes are very expensive. And for her to be like,

878
00:40:06,160 --> 00:40:09,520
Speaker 4: you're not getting me a gift also just weird, just

879
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:12,160
Speaker 4: weird in general, even if like someone wasn't getting you

880
00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:14,600
Speaker 4: a gift, to be like you're not getting me a gift,

881
00:40:14,640 --> 00:40:15,680
Speaker 4: that's so rude of you.

882
00:40:15,920 --> 00:40:18,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like, what is this an eleven year old's

883
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:19,000
Speaker 2: birthday party?

884
00:40:19,160 --> 00:40:19,720
Speaker 4: Very strange?

885
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:20,799
Speaker 2: What come on?

886
00:40:21,080 --> 00:40:23,279
Speaker 4: I told her I was, and that it was the

887
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:26,120
Speaker 4: cake and reminded her that the cake was free. She

888
00:40:26,200 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 4: said that wasn't a gift, and that's a favor. I

889
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:31,719
Speaker 4: told her it's a gift, and that she can't tell

890
00:40:31,719 --> 00:40:34,080
Speaker 4: me what I can gift her. I then asked why

891
00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:36,160
Speaker 4: she was mentioning it, and she said the bridesmaid I

892
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:38,120
Speaker 4: spoke to Saturday. I told her that she was so

893
00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:40,920
Speaker 4: lucky to get a free cake, which you are so

894
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:44,280
Speaker 4: literally everyone else realizes how lucky Mary is except for Mary.

895
00:40:44,400 --> 00:40:45,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's like free cake.

896
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:49,799
Speaker 4: Yeah, killing who that I want a gift sports call.

897
00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:53,799
Speaker 4: She agreed, but then was upset when the bridesmaid said

898
00:40:53,840 --> 00:40:56,239
Speaker 4: that's a good gift. I asked her if her own

899
00:40:56,280 --> 00:41:00,080
Speaker 4: bridesmaid thinks it's a good gift, what's the problem. And

900
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:02,200
Speaker 4: she said it's not up to the bridesmaid to tell

901
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:05,239
Speaker 4: her what her gifts are. I told her, this is

902
00:41:05,280 --> 00:41:07,759
Speaker 4: her gift. She said that a gift needs to be

903
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:10,120
Speaker 4: something she could use in her marriage, not just the

904
00:41:10,160 --> 00:41:10,880
Speaker 4: cake at the wedding.

905
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:17,879
Speaker 2: I'm just really, I'm I'm honing in on the like

906
00:41:18,000 --> 00:41:20,399
Speaker 2: the bridesmaids don't get to choose what gifts they are.

907
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:24,000
Speaker 2: That's not getting a gift. That's like making people run

908
00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:25,080
Speaker 2: errands for you.

909
00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:27,360
Speaker 4: Literally, And I mean, there is a wedding registry, but

910
00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:31,799
Speaker 4: the cake is for your wedding. The cake is for

911
00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:36,000
Speaker 4: your wedding. Yeah, she's presumably paying for all of the ingredients.

912
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:38,000
Speaker 2: Four tiered wedding cake, four tiers.

913
00:41:38,000 --> 00:41:39,760
Speaker 4: She's paying for all the ingredients.

914
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:41,320
Speaker 2: And she's doing all the time dollars.

915
00:41:41,480 --> 00:41:45,600
Speaker 4: Yeah. No, that's a huge deal. I told her, with

916
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:47,839
Speaker 4: me going to school and not working right now, this

917
00:41:47,920 --> 00:41:50,200
Speaker 4: is a major expense that I'm taking on by doing

918
00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:52,880
Speaker 4: it for free. And she said that wasn't her problem

919
00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:56,520
Speaker 4: and that a real friend would do both. Hmmm, I guess,

920
00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:58,759
Speaker 4: so he's not a real friend, then, I guess. I

921
00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:00,840
Speaker 4: guess we've established that you guys aren't friends.

922
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:02,399
Speaker 2: That's the response right there.

923
00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:05,319
Speaker 4: Yeah. I responded with, fine, I'll get back to you,

924
00:42:05,760 --> 00:42:11,280
Speaker 4: and she thanked me for understanding. Damn. About thirty minutes later,

925
00:42:11,640 --> 00:42:14,040
Speaker 4: I sent her a bill for her cake. The bill

926
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:17,440
Speaker 4: was for seven hundred dollars, with a deposit of three

927
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:19,560
Speaker 4: hundred and fifty dollars due by this Friday.

928
00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:21,320
Speaker 2: Dang, and it was all the money.

929
00:42:21,360 --> 00:42:23,000
Speaker 4: Oh, Pi's like, you know what, I know how much

930
00:42:23,040 --> 00:42:25,719
Speaker 4: I'm worth. I know my time is worth money and

931
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:28,319
Speaker 4: the rest. Twenty four hours before the events start time.

932
00:42:29,440 --> 00:42:31,799
Speaker 4: She asked me what that was for, and I told

933
00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:33,959
Speaker 4: her it's not since it's not a gift, she needs

934
00:42:33,960 --> 00:42:36,319
Speaker 4: to pay for it. She said she couldn't afford it,

935
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:37,960
Speaker 4: and I told her I didn't care, and this was

936
00:42:38,000 --> 00:42:39,120
Speaker 4: what business looks like.

937
00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:39,440
Speaker 2: OOO.

938
00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:42,120
Speaker 4: I did promise to get her a gift off her

939
00:42:42,120 --> 00:42:45,080
Speaker 4: registry though she told me no, cake is worth seven

940
00:42:45,160 --> 00:42:48,239
Speaker 4: hundred dollars. But in the bill breakdown, I pointed out

941
00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:51,880
Speaker 4: where it was going, from ingredients to transportation. Her venue

942
00:42:51,920 --> 00:42:55,640
Speaker 4: is forty five minutes away, additional labor. My husband helps

943
00:42:55,680 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 4: me deliver cake, so he's getting paid to last minute

944
00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:01,480
Speaker 4: booking time and the size of the cake on top

945
00:43:01,520 --> 00:43:05,040
Speaker 4: of the intricate decorations she wants. If she thinks that's

946
00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:07,680
Speaker 4: that seven hundred dollars is too expensive, then she can

947
00:43:07,719 --> 00:43:09,600
Speaker 4: go buy her own cake. She doesn't have to buy

948
00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:10,000
Speaker 4: it from op.

949
00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:13,000
Speaker 2: Why don't you make your own cake then figure it out?

950
00:43:13,280 --> 00:43:16,480
Speaker 4: Oh but you can't. You literally, this is so frustrating,

951
00:43:16,560 --> 00:43:19,239
Speaker 4: like people just taking advantage of their friends and their

952
00:43:19,239 --> 00:43:22,520
Speaker 4: friend's time because they think, oh, well, you're my friend,

953
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:25,359
Speaker 4: so you owe me this favor. It's like, no, i'm

954
00:43:25,400 --> 00:43:27,880
Speaker 4: your friend, but also my time is valuable and you

955
00:43:27,880 --> 00:43:31,120
Speaker 4: don't get a just demand whatever you want She said

956
00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 4: she shouldn't be charged for anything since I promised to

957
00:43:33,719 --> 00:43:35,560
Speaker 4: do it for free and it's too late to find

958
00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:39,200
Speaker 4: another baker. I said, that sounds an awful like, that

959
00:43:39,360 --> 00:43:45,640
Speaker 4: sounds an awful lot like not my problem, snaps, snaps,

960
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:48,680
Speaker 4: because it isn't. She then asked if I could just

961
00:43:48,719 --> 00:43:51,320
Speaker 4: do the cake for free and forget the gifts. Oh,

962
00:43:51,400 --> 00:43:54,480
Speaker 4: now we're noubbling back because you realize how expensive it is.

963
00:43:56,120 --> 00:43:59,360
Speaker 2: Oh, that's funny. I realized a cake was seven hundred dollars.

964
00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:00,160
Speaker 2: That's a good gif.

965
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:02,680
Speaker 4: You can give me that. But I said no, this

966
00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:05,120
Speaker 4: is the new deal. And I have not responded to

967
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:08,759
Speaker 4: her texts since she and her fiance were venting in

968
00:44:08,800 --> 00:44:11,040
Speaker 4: a group message with the wedding party that I'm not in.

969
00:44:11,680 --> 00:44:14,200
Speaker 4: One of the bride'smaids, who was a mutual friend, asked

970
00:44:14,200 --> 00:44:16,279
Speaker 4: me what happened after telling me what was being said

971
00:44:16,320 --> 00:44:18,640
Speaker 4: in the group text, and I sent her the messages

972
00:44:18,680 --> 00:44:24,160
Speaker 4: of our exchange. And now apparently the bridal party is divided. Ooh,

973
00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:26,080
Speaker 4: there's some discord in the group.

974
00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:28,720
Speaker 2: You've sown discord in the bridal party.

975
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:30,920
Speaker 4: Some are saying I should go back and do the

976
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:33,759
Speaker 4: cake for free, like I originally promised, while others are

977
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:36,440
Speaker 4: telling Mary she was wrong and apparently it's become a

978
00:44:36,640 --> 00:44:38,160
Speaker 4: huge ordeal.

979
00:44:39,320 --> 00:44:42,319
Speaker 2: In what universe? Are people telling you you need to

980
00:44:42,520 --> 00:44:47,080
Speaker 2: actually do the free cake thing. You've made a mistake. No,

981
00:44:47,280 --> 00:44:51,120
Speaker 2: she needs to apologize, She needs to grobble and just

982
00:44:51,160 --> 00:44:55,600
Speaker 2: be like, Okay, look, I didn't realize exactly what level

983
00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:58,280
Speaker 2: of sort of gift slash favor you were doing.

984
00:44:58,719 --> 00:45:00,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, and that was totally my I'm so sorry.

985
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:02,080
Speaker 2: I'll never do that again.

986
00:45:02,560 --> 00:45:04,839
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then you give her an extra hundred dollars.

987
00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:08,840
Speaker 4: Her fiance is now mad at both of us for

988
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:12,399
Speaker 4: being petty and ridiculous. My husband is team Mary can

989
00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:14,640
Speaker 4: suck an egg and doesn't think I should do the

990
00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:16,520
Speaker 4: cake or get the gift, but he told me to

991
00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:19,760
Speaker 4: remember this could cost me a friendship, but he'd support

992
00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:21,920
Speaker 4: me either way. But he thinks I should stand my

993
00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:26,000
Speaker 4: ground in this and not let Mary push me around. However,

994
00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:29,840
Speaker 4: my husband also doesn't really like Mary for unrelated reasons,

995
00:45:29,960 --> 00:45:32,759
Speaker 4: so he may be biased. Am I the ale for

996
00:45:32,840 --> 00:45:35,440
Speaker 4: charging my friend for the cake and refusing to do

997
00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:38,479
Speaker 4: it for free after she got mad at me? And

998
00:45:39,080 --> 00:45:41,359
Speaker 4: edit to add burner account because I'm pretty sure Mary

999
00:45:41,400 --> 00:45:44,720
Speaker 4: has a reddit for wedding subs and there is an update.

1000
00:45:45,120 --> 00:45:48,960
Speaker 2: So yeah, my official verdict on this would be not

1001
00:45:49,520 --> 00:45:53,960
Speaker 2: the ale. Not the ale as long as you have

1002
00:45:54,000 --> 00:46:02,399
Speaker 2: not received a heartfelt, grallity apology from Mary. Yeah, and

1003
00:46:02,440 --> 00:46:05,680
Speaker 2: then it'd be like all right, okay, and then still

1004
00:46:05,719 --> 00:46:08,520
Speaker 2: maybe charge one hundred body yeah, and then get her,

1005
00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:10,600
Speaker 2: you know, a cheap thing off her for gift.

1006
00:46:10,440 --> 00:46:14,640
Speaker 4: Registry her like a bowl, just one Ikia bowl.

1007
00:46:14,880 --> 00:46:15,640
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1008
00:46:15,760 --> 00:46:18,440
Speaker 4: No, I think, yeah, I think if she apologized heart felt,

1009
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:22,279
Speaker 4: it'd be different. But as of right now, you are

1010
00:46:22,320 --> 00:46:24,040
Speaker 4: not the able at all, and you don't know or

1011
00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:25,319
Speaker 4: something that she's not grateful for.

1012
00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:28,960
Speaker 2: Yeah. And it sounds like she weaponized the bridal party,

1013
00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:32,080
Speaker 2: is what It sounds like she kind of she it's

1014
00:46:32,120 --> 00:46:33,920
Speaker 2: not found out.

1015
00:46:34,719 --> 00:46:35,760
Speaker 4: This is what happened.

1016
00:46:36,000 --> 00:46:37,839
Speaker 2: That's how they found out. They found out because she

1017
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:40,680
Speaker 2: was like, oh pe tacking my cake away.

1018
00:46:40,719 --> 00:46:43,560
Speaker 4: Yeah. So she's already not only has she not apologized,

1019
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:45,960
Speaker 4: but she's actively like pitting people onto op.

1020
00:46:46,440 --> 00:46:47,560
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1021
00:46:47,800 --> 00:46:51,400
Speaker 4: But there is an update. I read as many comments

1022
00:46:51,400 --> 00:46:53,880
Speaker 4: as I could, tbh, I did not expect the amount

1023
00:46:53,920 --> 00:46:56,240
Speaker 4: of responses I got and responded to who I could.

1024
00:46:56,840 --> 00:46:59,200
Speaker 4: This post was originally going to be answering as many

1025
00:46:59,239 --> 00:47:02,800
Speaker 4: repeat questions as I could, but this morning, mutual friend

1026
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:05,920
Speaker 4: bride'smaid I'll call Pam, messaged me today to give me

1027
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:09,520
Speaker 4: an update. Mary and her fiance I'll call Frank are

1028
00:47:09,560 --> 00:47:12,440
Speaker 4: currently not on speaking terms because they got into an

1029
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:16,400
Speaker 4: argument last night. It wasn't directly because of the cake,

1030
00:47:16,520 --> 00:47:21,480
Speaker 4: but what the cake debacle revealed to Frank Apparently Mary

1031
00:47:21,480 --> 00:47:25,319
Speaker 4: has been spending a lot of his money on the wedding. Now,

1032
00:47:25,360 --> 00:47:27,799
Speaker 4: we all kind of already knew that Mary told us

1033
00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:30,000
Speaker 4: Frank and his family would be footing the bill. He's

1034
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:32,320
Speaker 4: an engineer and his family has a lot of money.

1035
00:47:32,880 --> 00:47:35,319
Speaker 4: I'm not exactly sure what their family wealth is from,

1036
00:47:35,520 --> 00:47:37,360
Speaker 4: but it was enough to pay out of pocket for

1037
00:47:37,480 --> 00:47:41,040
Speaker 4: him and his siblings to go to expensive universities debt free.

1038
00:47:42,320 --> 00:47:46,120
Speaker 4: That's a pretty good deal. What we didn't know is

1039
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:50,000
Speaker 4: that they've been arguing about the finances this entire time.

1040
00:47:50,440 --> 00:47:54,120
Speaker 4: Uh oh, and my cake was the last straw for Frank. Oh.

1041
00:47:54,239 --> 00:47:57,560
Speaker 4: Mary's budget for the wedding was thirty thousand dollars, and

1042
00:47:57,600 --> 00:48:02,759
Speaker 4: she's apparently spent almost double that on intricate flowers, her

1043
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:08,920
Speaker 4: wedding dress, decorations, engagement photos, catering, open bar entertainment, and

1044
00:48:09,080 --> 00:48:13,080
Speaker 4: flying her family in and paying for their accommodations. Yeah,

1045
00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:15,280
Speaker 4: just a sixty thousand dollars wedding.

1046
00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:18,920
Speaker 2: Just a good sixty k on sixty k.

1047
00:48:20,200 --> 00:48:22,840
Speaker 4: That's crazy. Yeah, oh my god.

1048
00:48:22,719 --> 00:48:27,000
Speaker 2: Never understand it. I never will. I never understand spending

1049
00:48:28,200 --> 00:48:32,840
Speaker 2: even five figures on a wedding. Like I'm gonna get married,

1050
00:48:33,160 --> 00:48:37,320
Speaker 2: come to the park. It costs you zero dollars and

1051
00:48:37,480 --> 00:48:38,480
Speaker 2: we're all gonna hang out.

1052
00:48:38,840 --> 00:48:40,920
Speaker 4: We're just gonna hang out and wander around the park

1053
00:48:40,960 --> 00:48:42,000
Speaker 4: and also married.

1054
00:48:42,080 --> 00:48:44,760
Speaker 2: I've got a preacher there. We're getting a we're getting

1055
00:48:44,760 --> 00:48:45,719
Speaker 2: married at the park.

1056
00:48:45,920 --> 00:48:48,960
Speaker 4: Form a line. Anyone else, Barbara get married. I want

1057
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:52,040
Speaker 4: to have a backyard barbecue wedding. Yeah, so that's and

1058
00:48:52,320 --> 00:48:56,040
Speaker 4: that costs the cost of food. Well, I think my plan,

1059
00:48:56,080 --> 00:48:59,759
Speaker 4: which some of you have heard, I want to have

1060
00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:02,719
Speaker 4: it in like maybe my future backyard and put the

1061
00:49:02,760 --> 00:49:05,879
Speaker 4: money into like fixing up the backyard that you went

1062
00:49:05,880 --> 00:49:06,520
Speaker 4: into a wedding.

1063
00:49:06,880 --> 00:49:10,200
Speaker 2: Oh so it's like a breaking in the house slash.

1064
00:49:10,360 --> 00:49:13,280
Speaker 2: I like how we're now talking about our weddings instead

1065
00:49:13,280 --> 00:49:14,479
Speaker 2: of all right.

1066
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:19,840
Speaker 4: Right, ope's wedding Mary, Mary's clearly trying to take advantage

1067
00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:22,120
Speaker 4: of everyone in her life. And maybe it's not the

1068
00:49:22,120 --> 00:49:24,200
Speaker 4: best friend. Maybe this is not the type of friend, like,

1069
00:49:24,200 --> 00:49:27,480
Speaker 4: maybe this is the revealing situation where you realize that

1070
00:49:27,520 --> 00:49:28,879
Speaker 4: Mary is just not a good friend, not.

1071
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:30,840
Speaker 2: A friend at all. Didn't sound like a friend to me.

1072
00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:33,560
Speaker 4: The venue alone took a good chunk of their money

1073
00:49:33,640 --> 00:49:36,600
Speaker 4: because of the size and location an hour away from

1074
00:49:36,600 --> 00:49:39,920
Speaker 4: where we all live. It's a large house, maybe considered

1075
00:49:39,960 --> 00:49:43,800
Speaker 4: a mansion, I can't remember. With several acres of land, horses,

1076
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:46,360
Speaker 4: a lake, and a field for wedding photos.

1077
00:49:46,440 --> 00:49:48,520
Speaker 2: That's a mansion, dude, I can tell you that, right.

1078
00:49:48,800 --> 00:49:50,840
Speaker 2: I don't really remember if it was a mansion. It

1079
00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:54,480
Speaker 2: just had a lake in a field and a question

1080
00:49:54,640 --> 00:49:55,760
Speaker 2: in the scenario.

1081
00:49:55,320 --> 00:49:59,640
Speaker 4: Wild horses roaming. The entire wedding party is supposedly staying

1082
00:49:59,640 --> 00:50:01,640
Speaker 4: there for a few days leading up to the wedding.

1083
00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:04,879
Speaker 4: I've not seen it in person. Again, I'm not in

1084
00:50:04,920 --> 00:50:08,360
Speaker 4: the wedding party and never was, but the photos online

1085
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:11,799
Speaker 4: make it obvious why it's so expensive. That's crazy that

1086
00:50:11,840 --> 00:50:14,960
Speaker 4: Opie's not even in the wedding party, Like, is doing

1087
00:50:15,000 --> 00:50:18,000
Speaker 4: all of this this huge favor for Opie He's not

1088
00:50:18,120 --> 00:50:21,200
Speaker 4: in the wedding party, and Mary's still sorry. I'm doing

1089
00:50:21,280 --> 00:50:24,800
Speaker 4: this huge favor for Mary, and Mary still expects a gift.

1090
00:50:25,840 --> 00:50:29,040
Speaker 4: It's not even in the wedding party. That's crazy crazy.

1091
00:50:29,840 --> 00:50:32,120
Speaker 4: I had no idea they had spent that much, and

1092
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:35,000
Speaker 4: neither did anyone in the wedding party. As far as

1093
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:37,600
Speaker 4: we all knew. The most expensive thing Mary had brought

1094
00:50:37,840 --> 00:50:40,160
Speaker 4: had bought was her wedding dress, to the tune of

1095
00:50:40,239 --> 00:50:43,520
Speaker 4: five thousand dollars. Wow. I only know because I went

1096
00:50:43,520 --> 00:50:45,480
Speaker 4: with her to try some on with some other friends

1097
00:50:45,480 --> 00:50:49,560
Speaker 4: and bridesmaids. Pam's fiance is one of Frank's groomsmen, and

1098
00:50:49,600 --> 00:50:52,239
Speaker 4: Frank's been venting through the groomsmen and texts about how

1099
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:55,279
Speaker 4: much this is costing, and he's not sure he wants

1100
00:50:55,360 --> 00:50:56,280
Speaker 4: to do this anymore.

1101
00:50:56,480 --> 00:51:00,040
Speaker 2: Whoa, uh oh oh No.

1102
00:51:00,320 --> 00:51:03,000
Speaker 4: However, he feels compelled to because the money has been

1103
00:51:03,000 --> 00:51:05,520
Speaker 4: spent and is non refundable. But he said he didn't

1104
00:51:05,560 --> 00:51:07,920
Speaker 4: know Mary would be this way about a wedding because

1105
00:51:07,920 --> 00:51:11,560
Speaker 4: she typically sticks to budgets, which is true. He needs

1106
00:51:11,560 --> 00:51:13,600
Speaker 4: to go have more conversations with Mary and less to

1107
00:51:13,640 --> 00:51:16,759
Speaker 4: his friends. Yea, he needs to stop complaining about his

1108
00:51:16,800 --> 00:51:20,200
Speaker 4: wife and urged yeah, talking to Rich be like, hey,

1109
00:51:20,200 --> 00:51:22,320
Speaker 4: we don't have the money, like this is the amount

1110
00:51:22,320 --> 00:51:25,719
Speaker 4: of money that we have, we can't go over. Literally,

1111
00:51:25,880 --> 00:51:29,120
Speaker 4: everyone is surprised by how much she is supposedly spending,

1112
00:51:29,239 --> 00:51:31,880
Speaker 4: including my husband and me. Mary is the person who

1113
00:51:31,960 --> 00:51:34,520
Speaker 4: gets everything off brand at the store to save a dollar,

1114
00:51:34,640 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 4: even when she doesn't really need to. From what Pam

1115
00:51:37,680 --> 00:51:39,759
Speaker 4: told me, Mary asked him to just pay me so

1116
00:51:39,840 --> 00:51:42,319
Speaker 4: she could have the cake, and he said no, not

1117
00:51:42,440 --> 00:51:44,640
Speaker 4: because he couldn't afford it, because he was tired of

1118
00:51:44,680 --> 00:51:47,920
Speaker 4: spending money on just one day. He told her to

1119
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:49,160
Speaker 4: figure it out herself.

1120
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:52,080
Speaker 2: You want that cake, figure it out, make it your shelf,

1121
00:51:52,120 --> 00:51:52,879
Speaker 2: figure it out.

1122
00:51:53,280 --> 00:51:55,560
Speaker 4: So nobody knows what is going on anymore, and if

1123
00:51:55,600 --> 00:51:58,160
Speaker 4: there will even be a wedding. No one has reached

1124
00:51:58,160 --> 00:52:00,680
Speaker 4: out to me about making the cake either, and my husband,

1125
00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:04,120
Speaker 4: for those wondering, is still team Mary. Can suck an

1126
00:52:04,120 --> 00:52:08,560
Speaker 4: egg before anyone asks. No, Mary did not grow up poor.

1127
00:52:08,760 --> 00:52:11,120
Speaker 4: She was very much middle class like I was, and

1128
00:52:11,160 --> 00:52:13,879
Speaker 4: she's never been broke or anything. She's also never seen

1129
00:52:13,960 --> 00:52:17,239
Speaker 4: like she wanted overly expensive stuff. She drives a ten

1130
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:19,759
Speaker 4: year old to Dan that despite Frank saying she needs

1131
00:52:19,800 --> 00:52:22,400
Speaker 4: a new car she won't get rid of because it

1132
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:24,880
Speaker 4: runs fine and my dad taught me to drive my

1133
00:52:24,920 --> 00:52:28,120
Speaker 4: cars into the ground. So this is like totally off

1134
00:52:28,160 --> 00:52:31,520
Speaker 4: brand for Mary. She's it seems like she's pretty frugal

1135
00:52:31,760 --> 00:52:34,000
Speaker 4: except for this sixty thousand dollars wedding.

1136
00:52:34,160 --> 00:52:36,040
Speaker 2: Want the one day I was just so, I want

1137
00:52:36,080 --> 00:52:36,720
Speaker 2: my one.

1138
00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:39,040
Speaker 4: Day, want my one day to be day to be

1139
00:52:39,160 --> 00:52:43,279
Speaker 4: sixty thousand dollars worth of day. Yeah, so believe me

1140
00:52:43,320 --> 00:52:45,440
Speaker 4: when I say it really is out of character for

1141
00:52:45,480 --> 00:52:48,359
Speaker 4: her to be this nonchalant about money. I'm not sure

1142
00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:50,279
Speaker 4: if I'll have another update. If I do, it'll be

1143
00:52:50,360 --> 00:52:53,160
Speaker 4: after the wedding if there is one. And edit, I

1144
00:52:53,200 --> 00:52:55,080
Speaker 4: know a lot of people are saying things about Mary

1145
00:52:55,200 --> 00:52:57,879
Speaker 4: just using Frank for his money, But at the same time,

1146
00:52:57,960 --> 00:53:00,279
Speaker 4: I want to remember that Pam only gave me rank

1147
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:03,799
Speaker 4: side via what he's been telling the groomsman. I have

1148
00:53:03,920 --> 00:53:06,200
Speaker 4: no idea what part he played and if this is

1149
00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:09,640
Speaker 4: really if this really actually bothered him up to this point,

1150
00:53:10,239 --> 00:53:12,320
Speaker 4: or if he's ever mentioned the amount she's been spending

1151
00:53:12,360 --> 00:53:16,000
Speaker 4: to her. It's now six pm and I've not spoken

1152
00:53:16,040 --> 00:53:19,040
Speaker 4: to or heard from Mary since yesterday. After giving her

1153
00:53:19,080 --> 00:53:21,720
Speaker 4: the quote, So I don't have any more to add

1154
00:53:21,800 --> 00:53:24,880
Speaker 4: other than my perspective. It really does sound out of

1155
00:53:24,960 --> 00:53:27,720
Speaker 4: character for Mary to be doing this, But I remember

1156
00:53:27,760 --> 00:53:30,040
Speaker 4: when I got married that my husband said he wanted

1157
00:53:30,040 --> 00:53:32,200
Speaker 4: me to have what made me happy for our wedding.

1158
00:53:32,760 --> 00:53:34,759
Speaker 4: If he's been telling her what my husband told me

1159
00:53:34,880 --> 00:53:37,719
Speaker 4: and still giving her money, then he's definitely not an

1160
00:53:37,800 --> 00:53:40,880
Speaker 4: innocent party in my opinion. And there is an update.

1161
00:53:41,400 --> 00:53:44,400
Speaker 2: Let's dig Let's dig into this update.

1162
00:53:44,719 --> 00:53:50,200
Speaker 4: Long story short, the villain in this situation wasn't Mary

1163
00:53:51,160 --> 00:53:55,320
Speaker 4: plot twist, Oh, it was Frank. It was Frank Frank

1164
00:53:55,440 --> 00:53:59,279
Speaker 4: along and no they did not get married. If you

1165
00:53:59,280 --> 00:54:01,600
Speaker 4: want to read the first updates, there are only other

1166
00:54:01,719 --> 00:54:04,440
Speaker 4: to post in my profile, and this update is all

1167
00:54:04,480 --> 00:54:07,440
Speaker 4: the information I've gathered from bridesmaid Pam and her fiance,

1168
00:54:07,640 --> 00:54:10,680
Speaker 4: so bear with me. Most of this is what Mary

1169
00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:12,960
Speaker 4: has told Pam, who then related to me. I love

1170
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:15,000
Speaker 4: that opiaza a woman on the inside.

1171
00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:16,560
Speaker 2: She's got the inside track.

1172
00:54:17,120 --> 00:54:20,520
Speaker 4: Anyway. I've mentioned before that Mary was and is a

1173
00:54:20,560 --> 00:54:23,520
Speaker 4: frugal person. That's why we all thought the gift and

1174
00:54:23,560 --> 00:54:25,560
Speaker 4: cake thing was weird, as well as her spending a

1175
00:54:25,560 --> 00:54:28,879
Speaker 4: bunch of money for the wedding. It turns out that

1176
00:54:28,960 --> 00:54:32,360
Speaker 4: Mary has actually been trying to save money despite doubling

1177
00:54:32,360 --> 00:54:37,719
Speaker 4: their budget. Apparently, Frank's family always throws extravagant celebrations and parties.

1178
00:54:38,160 --> 00:54:42,799
Speaker 4: This includes birthdays, holidays, graduations, and weddings, so Frank had

1179
00:54:42,800 --> 00:54:45,320
Speaker 4: been emphasizing to Mary that this wedding was supposed to

1180
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:48,680
Speaker 4: be huge because that's just how his family is. I'm

1181
00:54:48,680 --> 00:54:51,279
Speaker 4: guessing it's a way to flaunt success, but that's just

1182
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:54,160
Speaker 4: a guess. I don't actually know the real reason. But

1183
00:54:54,239 --> 00:54:57,440
Speaker 4: Frank has been hands off the entire time. I'm not

1184
00:54:57,520 --> 00:55:00,960
Speaker 4: surprised my own husband only cared with the food cake

1185
00:55:01,000 --> 00:55:04,400
Speaker 4: flavor and that the colors weren't pink. But Frank had

1186
00:55:04,440 --> 00:55:07,120
Speaker 4: been telling Mary to save money since that's what she's

1187
00:55:07,160 --> 00:55:09,640
Speaker 4: good at, that's what she's good at, and that he

1188
00:55:09,640 --> 00:55:11,600
Speaker 4: didn't want to spend a bunch of money on one day.

1189
00:55:12,160 --> 00:55:14,600
Speaker 4: So Mary picked out things that were cheaper. But we're

1190
00:55:14,640 --> 00:55:18,879
Speaker 4: not good enough for Frank, Like that mansion slash large

1191
00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:22,680
Speaker 4: house where everyone would be staying. Yeah, Frank's idea, Hey,

1192
00:55:22,719 --> 00:55:25,080
Speaker 4: you gotta do that for Frank. Gotta do it for Frank. Frank,

1193
00:55:25,120 --> 00:55:27,840
Speaker 4: he needs his mansion Mary apparently wanted to do a

1194
00:55:27,880 --> 00:55:30,440
Speaker 4: hotel that hosted weddings because her family could stay there

1195
00:55:30,440 --> 00:55:32,480
Speaker 4: for less money and the hotel was just cheaper to

1196
00:55:32,520 --> 00:55:35,880
Speaker 4: host a wedding versus a literal mansion with horses. He

1197
00:55:35,920 --> 00:55:38,759
Speaker 4: would do this with everything and veto things like her

1198
00:55:38,840 --> 00:55:42,080
Speaker 4: choices of decorations and vendors because they weren't big enough

1199
00:55:42,520 --> 00:55:45,960
Speaker 4: or I'm guessing extravagant. Damn Okay. So it seems like

1200
00:55:47,080 --> 00:55:50,879
Speaker 4: Frank is doing kind of two things. He's saying, Oh,

1201
00:55:50,920 --> 00:55:53,360
Speaker 4: I want you to budget for the wedding, and she's like, okay,

1202
00:55:53,520 --> 00:55:56,560
Speaker 4: here's a suggestion. He's like, no, that's so late, that's ugly,

1203
00:55:56,719 --> 00:55:57,560
Speaker 4: that's not good enough.

1204
00:55:57,640 --> 00:56:00,759
Speaker 2: I told you to budget for the wedding. Don't make

1205
00:56:00,840 --> 00:56:02,000
Speaker 2: us look pulled.

1206
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:05,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, He's like, I want a mansion, but also a

1207
00:56:05,440 --> 00:56:07,120
Speaker 4: budget mansion.

1208
00:56:06,520 --> 00:56:11,640
Speaker 2: On a budget. Sell did you misspell horse garden? Because

1209
00:56:11,640 --> 00:56:14,080
Speaker 2: that's what I want at the mansion that we have

1210
00:56:14,160 --> 00:56:15,480
Speaker 2: a wedding at belt.

1211
00:56:15,320 --> 00:56:17,320
Speaker 4: And says Frank and his family can't have it both ways.

1212
00:56:17,360 --> 00:56:20,719
Speaker 4: It's either extravagant or affordable. It seems like Frank just

1213
00:56:20,800 --> 00:56:24,760
Speaker 4: doesn't because he's wealthy or grew up wealthy doesn't really

1214
00:56:25,000 --> 00:56:27,440
Speaker 4: understand the value of money. It's like, oh, I want

1215
00:56:27,520 --> 00:56:30,160
Speaker 4: you to budget, but also doesn't understand that these things

1216
00:56:30,160 --> 00:56:31,520
Speaker 4: that he wants are very expensive.

1217
00:56:31,800 --> 00:56:36,800
Speaker 2: He's he's a he's two faced. Two Francs inside of Frank.

1218
00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:38,200
Speaker 4: There are just a little Frank.

1219
00:56:39,000 --> 00:56:41,879
Speaker 2: One is fighting to not spend money and the other

1220
00:56:41,920 --> 00:56:45,080
Speaker 2: one wants to spend all of his money.

1221
00:56:45,640 --> 00:56:48,600
Speaker 4: He even told her how big her bouquet to be

1222
00:56:48,760 --> 00:56:51,200
Speaker 4: and that her dress needed to have a lot of bling.

1223
00:56:51,920 --> 00:56:54,600
Speaker 4: So basically, Mary has been trying to stick to the budget,

1224
00:56:54,600 --> 00:56:57,120
Speaker 4: but what was in the budget didn't match Frank's taste

1225
00:56:57,200 --> 00:56:59,879
Speaker 4: or expectations. So when I said she had to pay

1226
00:57:00,120 --> 00:57:02,440
Speaker 4: for the cake, Frank accused Mary of not saving the

1227
00:57:02,520 --> 00:57:06,399
Speaker 4: money despite her being so money conscious. And Mary wasn't

1228
00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:08,000
Speaker 4: the one who had the problem with the cake, it

1229
00:57:08,120 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 4: was Frank. I guess they both knew the cake was free,

1230
00:57:11,160 --> 00:57:13,440
Speaker 4: but Frank didn't know I was making it as a gift.

1231
00:57:14,000 --> 00:57:16,440
Speaker 4: Mary explained that I was, and he said that didn't

1232
00:57:16,480 --> 00:57:18,120
Speaker 4: count and to ask me about it?

1233
00:57:18,160 --> 00:57:23,600
Speaker 2: What Frank, Frankie, shut up, Frankie, how to shut your mouth?

1234
00:57:24,160 --> 00:57:26,800
Speaker 4: He said it didn't count because friends doing friends for

1235
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:30,280
Speaker 4: friends doing favors for an event like a wedding isn't

1236
00:57:30,320 --> 00:57:34,000
Speaker 4: a gift on some level, she must have agreed, because

1237
00:57:34,040 --> 00:57:36,400
Speaker 4: she didn't mention Frank being the one with the problem

1238
00:57:36,440 --> 00:57:40,800
Speaker 4: at all in the messages. But whatever. Anyway, the cake

1239
00:57:40,920 --> 00:57:43,560
Speaker 4: was what Mary was really looking forward to because it

1240
00:57:43,640 --> 00:57:45,640
Speaker 4: was the only thing she felt she had one hundred

1241
00:57:45,680 --> 00:57:49,680
Speaker 4: percent saying regarding the wedding, and when I charged her

1242
00:57:49,720 --> 00:57:52,120
Speaker 4: for it, Frank was upset that Mary was not saving

1243
00:57:52,160 --> 00:57:55,240
Speaker 4: the money like he was expecting. This resulted in a

1244
00:57:55,280 --> 00:57:58,880
Speaker 4: fight where they ended up not on speaking terms. When

1245
00:57:58,880 --> 00:58:01,360
Speaker 4: Frank was complaining to Pam's fiance and the rest of

1246
00:58:01,400 --> 00:58:04,440
Speaker 4: the groomsmen, it was in text, and according to Pam,

1247
00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:07,680
Speaker 4: Mary found them and left Frank for making her seem

1248
00:58:07,720 --> 00:58:11,000
Speaker 4: like a greedy bee to everyone and when she was

1249
00:58:11,040 --> 00:58:15,120
Speaker 4: only getting things Frank wanted without Frank's help. Yeah, that's

1250
00:58:15,160 --> 00:58:19,280
Speaker 4: really frustrating, I think, regardless of the money issue, to

1251
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:22,040
Speaker 4: have someone who like, have a partner who doesn't want

1252
00:58:22,040 --> 00:58:24,240
Speaker 4: to help you at all with planning. Yeah, but also

1253
00:58:24,320 --> 00:58:27,880
Speaker 4: is so many little like nitpicky.

1254
00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:32,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, Frank is the bride woods in this situation.

1255
00:58:32,360 --> 00:58:34,400
Speaker 4: He is, and he doesn't want to help anyone.

1256
00:58:34,520 --> 00:58:38,919
Speaker 2: He's the groom gantua.

1257
00:58:39,600 --> 00:58:41,320
Speaker 4: I was trying to think of another one, but I couldn't,

1258
00:58:42,040 --> 00:58:45,520
Speaker 4: and that if it were up to her, they wouldn't

1259
00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:48,120
Speaker 4: have most of the expensive things she bought for the wedding.

1260
00:58:48,640 --> 00:58:51,360
Speaker 4: The only contact I've had for Mary was an apology

1261
00:58:51,400 --> 00:58:53,800
Speaker 4: text message when I told her it was okay and

1262
00:58:53,840 --> 00:58:57,240
Speaker 4: we were still friends. She didn't answer. In fact, she

1263
00:58:57,280 --> 00:59:00,320
Speaker 4: hasn't answered anyone other than to tell the wedding party

1264
00:59:00,400 --> 00:59:04,480
Speaker 4: that the wedding was off wow, apologize for the inconvenience.

1265
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:07,200
Speaker 4: And since then, oh, this is what Mary has done,

1266
00:59:07,680 --> 00:59:10,440
Speaker 4: and since then she's been quiet. She did post on

1267
00:59:10,480 --> 00:59:14,720
Speaker 4: her social media a long apology for canceling, she said, postponed,

1268
00:59:14,760 --> 00:59:17,720
Speaker 4: but I noticed her relationship status was gone. But the

1269
00:59:17,760 --> 00:59:21,360
Speaker 4: location check in is in the hometown where her parents live,

1270
00:59:21,600 --> 00:59:24,440
Speaker 4: not where we live, So I think she went back

1271
00:59:24,480 --> 00:59:27,720
Speaker 4: to her parents' house after calling the wedding off. But

1272
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:31,400
Speaker 4: that's all I know, and I heard its secondhand from Pam.

1273
00:59:31,600 --> 00:59:34,439
Speaker 4: But according to Pam, Frank is upset Mary left because

1274
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:37,160
Speaker 4: all his money is tied up in vendors that he

1275
00:59:37,200 --> 00:59:39,440
Speaker 4: can't get back, and he's been trying to plead his

1276
00:59:39,480 --> 00:59:42,600
Speaker 4: case with the groomsman but only his brother is on

1277
00:59:42,720 --> 00:59:46,080
Speaker 4: his side. Pam's fiance and the other groomsmen have stopped

1278
00:59:46,200 --> 00:59:48,800
Speaker 4: talking to him. Frank is losing all of his friends

1279
00:59:48,840 --> 00:59:49,880
Speaker 4: because he sucks.

1280
00:59:49,960 --> 00:59:51,320
Speaker 2: Frank has lost all support.

1281
00:59:51,480 --> 00:59:54,240
Speaker 4: But you know what, we would never want to lose

1282
00:59:54,520 --> 00:59:57,320
Speaker 4: you joining us live every weekday through PMPST on YouTube.

1283
00:59:57,360 --> 01:00:00,200
Speaker 4: Just tap her profile and there is a li litle

1284
01:00:00,200 --> 01:00:03,040
Speaker 4: bit left to the story. But what are our final

1285
01:00:03,160 --> 01:00:04,160
Speaker 4: wrapping up thoughts?

1286
01:00:04,480 --> 01:00:04,720
Speaker 2: You know?

1287
01:00:06,640 --> 01:00:10,280
Speaker 5: I feel like like a lot of the the blame

1288
01:00:10,400 --> 01:00:14,880
Speaker 5: is now immediately shifted onto Frank, which is fair, but

1289
01:00:14,960 --> 01:00:17,360
Speaker 5: I feel like Mary is not blameless in this.

1290
01:00:17,440 --> 01:00:20,240
Speaker 4: I don't think Mary is blameless, especially after I mean

1291
01:00:20,280 --> 01:00:23,680
Speaker 4: like she did text Op about that regardless of Frank's

1292
01:00:24,200 --> 01:00:24,600
Speaker 4: you know.

1293
01:00:24,560 --> 01:00:28,160
Speaker 2: Mary was on team Frank. Yeah, Mary was pro Frank.

1294
01:00:28,120 --> 01:00:32,440
Speaker 4: I think, regardless Frank's part in this, you know, and

1295
01:00:32,800 --> 01:00:35,400
Speaker 4: maybe in egging her on to go and tell Ope

1296
01:00:35,560 --> 01:00:38,880
Speaker 4: that the gift wasn't a good enough gift, Mary still

1297
01:00:38,880 --> 01:00:41,440
Speaker 4: play it was an act of participant in it, and

1298
01:00:41,560 --> 01:00:44,840
Speaker 4: I think it's good that she apologized. Yeah, she's not

1299
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:48,400
Speaker 4: completely blameless, It's it definitely seems like Frank is way

1300
01:00:48,440 --> 01:00:49,400
Speaker 4: more of a problem.

1301
01:00:49,480 --> 01:00:55,720
Speaker 2: But if Mary apologe by being like, no, it's.

1302
01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:56,840
Speaker 4: The wedding's off, but you can still make that cake

1303
01:00:56,880 --> 01:00:59,360
Speaker 4: for free. We can eat it, you can cry, We'll

1304
01:00:59,400 --> 01:01:04,600
Speaker 4: eat that cake together. Yeah, a man? What is switchero?

1305
01:01:04,760 --> 01:01:09,040
Speaker 2: Frank? Frank was Bridezilla the whole time, but all along.

1306
01:01:08,760 --> 01:01:11,240
Speaker 4: Scooby Doo mask comes off. It was a it was

1307
01:01:11,360 --> 01:01:17,240
Speaker 4: frayed along. Also there's more. I heard Charlotte asking why

1308
01:01:17,280 --> 01:01:19,880
Speaker 4: Mary wasn't paying for the wedding too. I can't answer that,

1309
01:01:19,960 --> 01:01:24,720
Speaker 4: but Mary works as an s as STNA and doesn't

1310
01:01:24,720 --> 01:01:27,240
Speaker 4: make a lot. Her bachelor's was in psychology and she

1311
01:01:27,360 --> 01:01:29,720
Speaker 4: never went on to get her doctorates, so getting employed

1312
01:01:29,720 --> 01:01:33,040
Speaker 4: in her field isn't very easy. Bless you. I also

1313
01:01:33,080 --> 01:01:35,400
Speaker 4: don't know if they're still together. Mary didn't say they

1314
01:01:35,440 --> 01:01:38,640
Speaker 4: broke up, just that the wedding is postponed sash canceled.

1315
01:01:39,360 --> 01:01:42,120
Speaker 4: I apologize if this confused anyone, but I'll try to

1316
01:01:42,160 --> 01:01:45,520
Speaker 4: answer anything I can in the comments. Just remember I

1317
01:01:45,560 --> 01:01:48,520
Speaker 4: heard most of this secondhand, besides the apology I got

1318
01:01:48,600 --> 01:01:51,400
Speaker 4: from Mary and the post she made online, so I

1319
01:01:51,480 --> 01:01:55,080
Speaker 4: may not have all the answers. And edit changed Pam's

1320
01:01:55,120 --> 01:01:58,680
Speaker 4: husband to Pam's fiance and that is the end of

1321
01:01:58,720 --> 01:01:59,400
Speaker 4: that story.

1322
01:01:59,560 --> 01:02:02,000
Speaker 2: Wooers man.

1323
01:02:02,040 --> 01:02:04,400
Speaker 4: Oh man, Well, it seems like it it's all working out.

1324
01:02:04,600 --> 01:02:09,920
Speaker 4: They're not getting franken Frank and Mary are not getting married,

1325
01:02:10,600 --> 01:02:13,640
Speaker 4: and Mary and Ope may are seemingly making up.

1326
01:02:13,760 --> 01:02:17,320
Speaker 2: Or the best. Everything happened for the best. My in

1327
01:02:17,440 --> 01:02:21,800
Speaker 2: laws ruined my wedding by bullying my mother. Now I

1328
01:02:21,880 --> 01:02:23,400
Speaker 2: wish I had just eloped.

1329
01:02:23,600 --> 01:02:25,919
Speaker 4: Why would they freaking bully your mom?

1330
01:02:26,120 --> 01:02:32,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, who's bullying? Who's out there bullying mom's kids? Let's

1331
01:02:32,280 --> 01:02:36,919
Speaker 2: figure it out by digging into this story. It will

1332
01:02:36,960 --> 01:02:40,320
Speaker 2: soon be my thirty three female and my husband's thirty

1333
01:02:40,320 --> 01:02:45,600
Speaker 2: five male wedding anniversary. While some celebrate this special day,

1334
01:02:45,640 --> 01:02:47,920
Speaker 2: we do not because I hate the day that we

1335
01:02:47,960 --> 01:02:51,640
Speaker 2: got married. Other couples remember it as the best day

1336
01:02:51,640 --> 01:02:53,880
Speaker 2: of their lives. I remember it as one of the

1337
01:02:53,920 --> 01:02:57,280
Speaker 2: worst days and was It was just one of many

1338
01:02:57,360 --> 01:03:00,920
Speaker 2: things that happened the year we got married. Broke me,

1339
01:03:01,720 --> 01:03:04,160
Speaker 2: sucks usus damn.

1340
01:03:04,600 --> 01:03:04,840
Speaker 4: Hey.

1341
01:03:04,880 --> 01:03:06,800
Speaker 2: I hope things have been on the upswing for you

1342
01:03:06,920 --> 01:03:10,240
Speaker 2: since Opie. And by the way, uh this comes from

1343
01:03:10,320 --> 01:03:13,000
Speaker 2: user Cupcake nineteen oh six on the r slash Okay

1344
01:03:13,000 --> 01:03:15,760
Speaker 2: story time stop read it. So the first crappy thing

1345
01:03:15,760 --> 01:03:18,560
Speaker 2: that happened that year was I miscarried. Are very much

1346
01:03:18,640 --> 01:03:21,640
Speaker 2: wanted and loved baby. We had been trying five plus

1347
01:03:21,720 --> 01:03:24,040
Speaker 2: years for two months before our wedding day.

1348
01:03:24,160 --> 01:03:29,400
Speaker 4: That's so sad, that's already going into it with like

1349
01:03:29,680 --> 01:03:31,000
Speaker 4: a lot of pain.

1350
01:03:31,280 --> 01:03:33,560
Speaker 2: One of the worst things I could ever think of

1351
01:03:33,640 --> 01:03:38,200
Speaker 2: happening at any time ever, is what that was. Wow.

1352
01:03:39,840 --> 01:03:43,560
Speaker 2: We were devastated. It put me into a dark place

1353
01:03:43,600 --> 01:03:45,320
Speaker 2: which I didn't think I could get out of, and

1354
01:03:45,360 --> 01:03:48,520
Speaker 2: we almost called off our wedding, but I pushed through

1355
01:03:48,600 --> 01:03:51,440
Speaker 2: and tried to look forward to our wedding day a

1356
01:03:51,440 --> 01:03:54,400
Speaker 2: lot of strength there. I had asked my husband's sisters

1357
01:03:54,440 --> 01:03:57,000
Speaker 2: to be two of my bridesmaids as we had become

1358
01:03:57,040 --> 01:03:59,720
Speaker 2: close since my hubby and I started dating, as well

1359
01:03:59,760 --> 01:04:02,480
Speaker 2: as two of my cousins. All four of them said

1360
01:04:02,520 --> 01:04:05,640
Speaker 2: yes with excitement. I also told them I planned on

1361
01:04:05,760 --> 01:04:07,440
Speaker 2: paying for us all to get our hair done on

1362
01:04:07,480 --> 01:04:10,520
Speaker 2: the morning of the wedding at my hairdressers, and then

1363
01:04:10,560 --> 01:04:12,600
Speaker 2: we can all get ready together in the hotel room

1364
01:04:12,640 --> 01:04:14,440
Speaker 2: I had booked at the location of our wedding.

1365
01:04:15,640 --> 01:04:16,920
Speaker 4: Seems like a nice deal.

1366
01:04:17,160 --> 01:04:19,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, it seems like just taking care of these four ladies.

1367
01:04:21,040 --> 01:04:25,200
Speaker 2: They all agreed and we're all excited. A month before

1368
01:04:25,240 --> 01:04:28,640
Speaker 2: the wedding, I had to pay the salon, so I

1369
01:04:28,720 --> 01:04:31,200
Speaker 2: messaged them on the Bridle WhatsApp group to make sure

1370
01:04:31,280 --> 01:04:34,040
Speaker 2: they could all make it still as I had to pay,

1371
01:04:34,600 --> 01:04:37,200
Speaker 2: and they all said yes. So I went and paid

1372
01:04:37,240 --> 01:04:40,840
Speaker 2: two hundred plus is that pounds or euros pounds? Two

1373
01:04:40,920 --> 01:04:44,000
Speaker 2: hundred plus pounds? So I went and paid two hundred

1374
01:04:44,040 --> 01:04:46,200
Speaker 2: plus pounds for all of us to have our hair

1375
01:04:46,240 --> 01:04:49,080
Speaker 2: done and told the girls to look at styles they wanted.

1376
01:04:49,560 --> 01:04:51,400
Speaker 2: I didn't care what they chose or if it looked

1377
01:04:51,440 --> 01:04:54,400
Speaker 2: better than mine. I don't like being the center of attention,

1378
01:04:54,520 --> 01:04:57,760
Speaker 2: so I didn't care if one of them upstaged me. Anyways,

1379
01:04:57,800 --> 01:05:00,480
Speaker 2: fast forward to ten days before my wedding, I sent

1380
01:05:00,520 --> 01:05:03,440
Speaker 2: a message to the WhatsApp group about how excited I

1381
01:05:03,600 --> 01:05:05,720
Speaker 2: was for the morning of having our hair done and

1382
01:05:05,720 --> 01:05:08,760
Speaker 2: getting ready and if they had all decided on a hairstyle,

1383
01:05:09,360 --> 01:05:11,280
Speaker 2: and then several things happened.

1384
01:05:11,440 --> 01:05:15,120
Speaker 4: Oh, I hope he was being so good about being like, hey,

1385
01:05:15,360 --> 01:05:17,360
Speaker 4: you know, like, are we ready? Are you guys on

1386
01:05:17,400 --> 01:05:18,360
Speaker 4: the same page?

1387
01:05:18,840 --> 01:05:20,280
Speaker 2: Can't wait ten days?

1388
01:05:20,480 --> 01:05:23,080
Speaker 4: Hey? Why did several things have to happen.

1389
01:05:23,200 --> 01:05:27,400
Speaker 2: Let's see what they were first. My hubby sisters said

1390
01:05:27,400 --> 01:05:29,400
Speaker 2: they were planning on getting their hair done and would

1391
01:05:29,400 --> 01:05:31,800
Speaker 2: be getting ready together at one of their houses, so

1392
01:05:31,800 --> 01:05:34,080
Speaker 2: they wouldn't be coming to the salon or getting to

1393
01:05:34,120 --> 01:05:37,200
Speaker 2: the hotel until just before the wedding. One of my

1394
01:05:37,360 --> 01:05:40,000
Speaker 2: cousins said she wouldn't be able to make it because

1395
01:05:40,040 --> 01:05:42,680
Speaker 2: her car had broken down. I asked her if her

1396
01:05:42,720 --> 01:05:44,960
Speaker 2: dad could bring her and she still lived at home,

1397
01:05:45,520 --> 01:05:48,120
Speaker 2: and she gave me some excuse which I can't remember,

1398
01:05:48,400 --> 01:05:51,120
Speaker 2: and then suggested she stay at my flat the night before,

1399
01:05:51,200 --> 01:05:53,800
Speaker 2: as hubby was staying at his dad's and we can

1400
01:05:53,840 --> 01:05:56,480
Speaker 2: have a girl's night. And her response to that was,

1401
01:05:56,600 --> 01:05:59,160
Speaker 2: I don't sleep well at other people's, so I'd rather

1402
01:05:59,240 --> 01:06:01,080
Speaker 2: stay at home and do my hair and makeup and

1403
01:06:01,120 --> 01:06:04,160
Speaker 2: look good for your wedding. I didn't respond after.

1404
01:06:03,920 --> 01:06:07,360
Speaker 4: This, wait, so he said, what was the like you

1405
01:06:07,400 --> 01:06:09,920
Speaker 4: can say? It was like, yeah, come, you can come

1406
01:06:09,920 --> 01:06:12,880
Speaker 4: stay at my place day before. She's like, I wouldn't

1407
01:06:12,920 --> 01:06:16,240
Speaker 4: sleep very well. I mean, that's kind of understandable. I

1408
01:06:16,280 --> 01:06:21,280
Speaker 4: don't always sleep well, you know, I had to. I was,

1409
01:06:22,080 --> 01:06:24,360
Speaker 4: I've I think I've lost the ability to sleep over

1410
01:06:24,400 --> 01:06:26,160
Speaker 4: at my parents' house because I was I was house

1411
01:06:26,160 --> 01:06:29,120
Speaker 4: sitting and I was I stayed over last night and

1412
01:06:29,200 --> 01:06:32,040
Speaker 4: I just felt like I just didn't get any sleep.

1413
01:06:32,080 --> 01:06:34,840
Speaker 4: But also that might have been because I'm becoming else. Yeah.

1414
01:06:34,920 --> 01:06:37,840
Speaker 2: I was about to say, you are also sick. You

1415
01:06:37,880 --> 01:06:42,560
Speaker 2: did just get sick. Both could have been. Maybe it's both,

1416
01:06:42,920 --> 01:06:43,640
Speaker 2: who knows.

1417
01:06:43,600 --> 01:06:45,760
Speaker 4: Maybe it's maybe Lene, Maybe it's a bit of both.

1418
01:06:45,960 --> 01:06:52,400
Speaker 2: Yeah. Uh, my auntie, Oh, this is bullet point number two.

1419
01:06:54,160 --> 01:06:56,920
Speaker 2: My auntie, the mother of my own my other cousin,

1420
01:06:57,200 --> 01:06:59,280
Speaker 2: messaged me to say my cousin won't be up in

1421
01:06:59,320 --> 01:07:01,480
Speaker 2: time to get to the salon. They lived over two

1422
01:07:01,480 --> 01:07:03,600
Speaker 2: hours from us in the appointment was booked for nine

1423
01:07:03,600 --> 01:07:06,240
Speaker 2: am when the salon opened, so she will just do

1424
01:07:06,360 --> 01:07:08,440
Speaker 2: her hair when she gets up and make up on

1425
01:07:08,520 --> 01:07:11,040
Speaker 2: the journey to the venue. I asked, can't they come

1426
01:07:11,040 --> 01:07:12,960
Speaker 2: down the night before like the rest of the family

1427
01:07:13,000 --> 01:07:17,080
Speaker 2: who lives hours away, But I was told no because

1428
01:07:17,120 --> 01:07:20,000
Speaker 2: my cousin was going out with her friends to a

1429
01:07:20,040 --> 01:07:22,640
Speaker 2: concert the night before my wedding. To this, I just

1430
01:07:22,760 --> 01:07:26,280
Speaker 2: said fine. So on the day of my wedding, I

1431
01:07:26,360 --> 01:07:28,640
Speaker 2: was the only one that got my hair done at

1432
01:07:28,640 --> 01:07:30,920
Speaker 2: the salon. When I told my hairdresser it was just

1433
01:07:30,960 --> 01:07:32,680
Speaker 2: going to be me. The morning of my wedding, she

1434
01:07:32,720 --> 01:07:35,200
Speaker 2: felt terrible for me. She gave me a refund for

1435
01:07:35,280 --> 01:07:37,960
Speaker 2: my bridesmaids and for the champagne they would have brided

1436
01:07:38,200 --> 01:07:39,560
Speaker 2: at the bridesmaids attended.

1437
01:07:39,960 --> 01:07:42,320
Speaker 4: I mean, at least you got a pity refund. But

1438
01:07:42,360 --> 01:07:46,200
Speaker 4: that's so frustrating when everyone agreed. Honestly, you should have

1439
01:07:46,200 --> 01:07:47,720
Speaker 4: made them all pay for it. You should have been like, hey,

1440
01:07:47,720 --> 01:07:50,120
Speaker 4: you guys agreed. Oh wait, no, she was paying for

1441
01:07:50,160 --> 01:07:50,440
Speaker 4: it all.

1442
01:07:50,520 --> 01:07:53,920
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, and she got the refund and also the

1443
01:07:53,960 --> 01:07:55,520
Speaker 2: chum pagna. She got that bad.

1444
01:07:55,640 --> 01:07:59,360
Speaker 4: That's so sad. But yeah, that's that really sucks. You're

1445
01:07:59,400 --> 01:08:00,400
Speaker 4: already gone.

1446
01:08:00,600 --> 01:08:02,160
Speaker 2: You know, it supposed to be a girl day.

1447
01:08:03,560 --> 01:08:07,480
Speaker 4: Friends, because you just had something kind of really traumatic

1448
01:08:07,680 --> 01:08:10,600
Speaker 4: happened two months prior, and it doesn't seem like they

1449
01:08:10,680 --> 01:08:13,360
Speaker 4: care enough to be there for you. Yeah, because you know,

1450
01:08:13,480 --> 01:08:16,120
Speaker 4: I've I've realized recently and that I have really great

1451
01:08:16,160 --> 01:08:18,880
Speaker 4: friends because they show up, and you want to have that.

1452
01:08:19,000 --> 01:08:21,599
Speaker 2: You have friends that show up for you, Yeah, for sure,

1453
01:08:22,120 --> 01:08:28,280
Speaker 2: that's the goal. So so I only paid for myself.

1454
01:08:29,080 --> 01:08:32,360
Speaker 2: During the session, I was trying not to cry, thinking

1455
01:08:32,400 --> 01:08:34,920
Speaker 2: about how none of my brides were getting ready with me,

1456
01:08:35,280 --> 01:08:37,439
Speaker 2: as well as thinking about how far along I would

1457
01:08:37,479 --> 01:08:40,400
Speaker 2: have been if I hadn't miscarried, and the tiny bump

1458
01:08:40,439 --> 01:08:45,880
Speaker 2: that I would have had damns so sad sad. Anyways,

1459
01:08:45,960 --> 01:08:49,479
Speaker 2: fast forward, my hair's done and my dad picks me up.

1460
01:08:50,520 --> 01:08:52,639
Speaker 2: We had to go and collect the table center pieces

1461
01:08:52,680 --> 01:08:55,720
Speaker 2: from a local shop. Now on to that third thing

1462
01:08:56,200 --> 01:08:59,799
Speaker 2: that ruined my wedding day. After picking up the center pieces,

1463
01:08:59,840 --> 01:09:01,479
Speaker 2: I had a phone call from my mother and she

1464
01:09:01,560 --> 01:09:04,360
Speaker 2: started shouting at me down the phone, asking where me

1465
01:09:04,400 --> 01:09:07,160
Speaker 2: and my dad were. She needed help finishing the cake.

1466
01:09:07,520 --> 01:09:10,240
Speaker 2: My mom made the wedding cake, and she still had

1467
01:09:10,240 --> 01:09:12,360
Speaker 2: to get ready and we were taking too long. I

1468
01:09:12,439 --> 01:09:14,680
Speaker 2: told my mom that Dad was just dropping me off

1469
01:09:14,680 --> 01:09:16,599
Speaker 2: at the wedding venue and then would be on his

1470
01:09:16,640 --> 01:09:19,920
Speaker 2: way home. After dropping me off at the venue, I

1471
01:09:20,040 --> 01:09:22,400
Speaker 2: helped finish setting up the reception room and then went

1472
01:09:22,439 --> 01:09:25,200
Speaker 2: to get ready, where my photographer took pictures of me

1473
01:09:25,240 --> 01:09:28,240
Speaker 2: getting ready, and it was lovely but lonely.

1474
01:09:28,600 --> 01:09:31,800
Speaker 4: It's supposed to be here, you got your friends surrounding you,

1475
01:09:31,880 --> 01:09:34,000
Speaker 4: It's supposed to be you in a girlies. This is

1476
01:09:34,120 --> 01:09:34,960
Speaker 4: so messed up.

1477
01:09:35,680 --> 01:09:37,639
Speaker 2: The girlies are not coming through for you right now.

1478
01:09:37,680 --> 01:09:40,720
Speaker 4: Who goes to a car. What's even more frustrating is

1479
01:09:40,720 --> 01:09:43,679
Speaker 4: the person who went to the concert when like they

1480
01:09:43,800 --> 01:09:47,800
Speaker 4: knew about this wedding for seemingly a long time.

1481
01:09:47,880 --> 01:09:50,679
Speaker 2: Yeah, also, come on, wake up early, Come on, also,

1482
01:09:50,720 --> 01:09:51,400
Speaker 2: wake up early.

1483
01:09:51,600 --> 01:09:54,040
Speaker 4: Literally just waked up hours early. This is like that

1484
01:09:54,080 --> 01:09:55,240
Speaker 4: one store. I don't know if you were there, but

1485
01:09:55,280 --> 01:09:57,280
Speaker 4: there was a story where this guy refused to get

1486
01:09:57,360 --> 01:09:59,400
Speaker 4: up at like I was there for that.

1487
01:10:00,360 --> 01:10:03,320
Speaker 2: I can't make it because it's just I'm It's like,

1488
01:10:03,439 --> 01:10:05,400
Speaker 2: shut up up, shut up, dude.

1489
01:10:05,960 --> 01:10:06,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's this.

1490
01:10:08,160 --> 01:10:11,680
Speaker 2: After I was ready, though, all the bridesmaids turned up

1491
01:10:12,120 --> 01:10:16,080
Speaker 2: better after I'm ready than never. Huh. However, it was

1492
01:10:16,120 --> 01:10:18,759
Speaker 2: ten minutes before I was due to walk down the aisle. Wow,

1493
01:10:19,120 --> 01:10:21,559
Speaker 2: the girlies really dropped the ball.

1494
01:10:21,920 --> 01:10:22,799
Speaker 4: That's crazy.

1495
01:10:23,800 --> 01:10:28,920
Speaker 2: Anyways, I digress. The ceremony went with no problems, and

1496
01:10:28,960 --> 01:10:32,200
Speaker 2: so did the pictures after, and so did the wedding breakfast.

1497
01:10:32,320 --> 01:10:34,280
Speaker 2: Not sure why it's called breakfast. We sat down and

1498
01:10:34,360 --> 01:10:35,559
Speaker 2: eat at like two pm.

1499
01:10:35,640 --> 01:10:35,880
Speaker 4: Damn.

1500
01:10:36,120 --> 01:10:38,719
Speaker 2: After all the food and speeches were finished at about

1501
01:10:38,840 --> 01:10:41,360
Speaker 2: four thirty pm, I decided on a two hour free

1502
01:10:41,360 --> 01:10:44,160
Speaker 2: time break. So this way, our photographer got a break

1503
01:10:44,400 --> 01:10:47,280
Speaker 2: and food, and everyone could do their own thing before

1504
01:10:47,320 --> 01:10:50,639
Speaker 2: the reception started at seven, where other guests we couldn't

1505
01:10:50,640 --> 01:10:53,519
Speaker 2: afford to invite to the wedding would be attending. My

1506
01:10:53,640 --> 01:10:55,760
Speaker 2: husband and I went back to our hotel room just

1507
01:10:55,760 --> 01:10:58,840
Speaker 2: to have some alone time as a newly married couple.

1508
01:10:59,520 --> 01:11:01,920
Speaker 2: I hope you were doing anything inappropriate, and they're okay.

1509
01:11:01,880 --> 01:11:04,759
Speaker 4: But to keep it appropriate that is interesting, really quick.

1510
01:11:05,520 --> 01:11:09,479
Speaker 4: The two hours of free time between I don't know.

1511
01:11:09,600 --> 01:11:12,000
Speaker 4: I mean, unless everyone has a place to stay, I

1512
01:11:12,040 --> 01:11:13,080
Speaker 4: don't know if I would love that.

1513
01:11:13,479 --> 01:11:16,679
Speaker 2: I just wandering around, wandering around, wander around for two hours.

1514
01:11:16,680 --> 01:11:19,880
Speaker 2: I'm taking my wife back to the hotel room, like.

1515
01:11:19,880 --> 01:11:21,799
Speaker 4: Okay, I don't know if I would.

1516
01:11:21,640 --> 01:11:27,679
Speaker 2: Like that, but we're like, yeah, okay, here's where. The

1517
01:11:27,720 --> 01:11:31,160
Speaker 2: fourth thing that happened that day, which also ruined my

1518
01:11:31,280 --> 01:11:33,759
Speaker 2: day for me, My hubby and I were talking about

1519
01:11:33,760 --> 01:11:38,040
Speaker 2: how our morning's had been. I told him mine, and

1520
01:11:38,120 --> 01:11:40,160
Speaker 2: when we talked about his, he dropped the bomb show

1521
01:11:40,160 --> 01:11:44,400
Speaker 2: that he had overheard Oh yeah, his two sisters complaining

1522
01:11:44,479 --> 01:11:47,400
Speaker 2: about me, saying they didn't understand why I was so

1523
01:11:47,479 --> 01:11:49,599
Speaker 2: upset over the fact that they weren't getting their hair

1524
01:11:49,600 --> 01:11:53,479
Speaker 2: done and ready with me. Wait wait, jaw dropped.

1525
01:11:53,680 --> 01:11:56,920
Speaker 4: I'm sorry, dude, why are you telling your your wife

1526
01:11:56,920 --> 01:11:59,720
Speaker 4: this on her wedding day? We didn't need to tell

1527
01:11:59,720 --> 01:12:02,680
Speaker 4: her this, Like maybe maybe this is a conversation that

1528
01:12:02,760 --> 01:12:05,599
Speaker 4: you have with your sisters later. Yeah, but you say, hey,

1529
01:12:05,640 --> 01:12:07,599
Speaker 4: don't talk about my wife like that. You don't need

1530
01:12:07,640 --> 01:12:10,559
Speaker 4: to tell your wife on her wedding Day's like, by

1531
01:12:10,600 --> 01:12:12,439
Speaker 4: the way, all your girlies don't like it. You know,

1532
01:12:12,600 --> 01:12:14,400
Speaker 4: they're freaking talking crap.

1533
01:12:14,439 --> 01:12:16,479
Speaker 2: I love that we're getting married. None of the girlies

1534
01:12:16,560 --> 01:12:16,960
Speaker 2: or your friends.

1535
01:12:17,000 --> 01:12:19,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, why would you tell her to say that? Keep

1536
01:12:19,400 --> 01:12:19,960
Speaker 4: your mouth shut?

1537
01:12:20,040 --> 01:12:22,240
Speaker 2: He wants to tell the truth. I get it, there's

1538
01:12:22,280 --> 01:12:23,320
Speaker 2: a principle.

1539
01:12:22,920 --> 01:12:25,360
Speaker 4: But I think there's there's a time. Wait one, Yeah,

1540
01:12:25,479 --> 01:12:27,720
Speaker 4: you have to wait. But also it's like you could

1541
01:12:27,760 --> 01:12:29,040
Speaker 4: have gone and stood up for her.

1542
01:12:29,479 --> 01:12:34,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, my jaw dropped. I asked Hubby if he stuck

1543
01:12:34,560 --> 01:12:37,040
Speaker 2: up for me, and he said no, he didn't want

1544
01:12:37,040 --> 01:12:38,200
Speaker 2: to cause an argument with them.

1545
01:12:38,240 --> 01:12:40,040
Speaker 4: Then why are you even bringing it up right now?

1546
01:12:40,840 --> 01:12:44,439
Speaker 2: This pissed me off, but I let it slide. I

1547
01:12:44,439 --> 01:12:46,360
Speaker 2: didn't want to have an even crappier day that I

1548
01:12:46,439 --> 01:12:49,919
Speaker 2: was already having. Finally it was time for the reception.

1549
01:12:50,439 --> 01:12:50,799
Speaker 4: Yay.

1550
01:12:52,400 --> 01:12:55,040
Speaker 2: We had our first dance, which I hated. Again I

1551
01:12:55,080 --> 01:12:58,320
Speaker 2: don't like being the center of attention. And then came

1552
01:12:58,439 --> 01:13:02,160
Speaker 2: time to cut the cake, the final thing that pushed

1553
01:13:02,160 --> 01:13:04,200
Speaker 2: me over the edge and completely made me wish my

1554
01:13:04,320 --> 01:13:07,840
Speaker 2: husband and I had just eloped. As I said previously,

1555
01:13:08,360 --> 01:13:10,320
Speaker 2: my mom had made our wedding cake and it was

1556
01:13:10,400 --> 01:13:14,200
Speaker 2: beautiful and I was so grateful. We cut the cake.

1557
01:13:14,640 --> 01:13:16,840
Speaker 2: There was no smashing it in each other's faces, just

1558
01:13:17,080 --> 01:13:20,599
Speaker 2: very simple. However, one of my hubbies relatives came up

1559
01:13:20,600 --> 01:13:23,400
Speaker 2: to me and made a joke about the cake looking

1560
01:13:23,640 --> 01:13:25,679
Speaker 2: cheap in front of my mother.

1561
01:13:26,000 --> 01:13:30,639
Speaker 4: Why would you say, who are these people? Old family?

1562
01:13:30,680 --> 01:13:32,760
Speaker 2: Kind of suns They didn't know, maybe that the mom

1563
01:13:32,800 --> 01:13:33,160
Speaker 2: made the.

1564
01:13:33,120 --> 01:13:37,320
Speaker 4: Cake, relatives didn't know, didn't know, But regardless, why would

1565
01:13:37,360 --> 01:13:38,880
Speaker 4: you say that about someone's wedding cake?

1566
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:42,360
Speaker 2: Yeah? Like, why, you're right? Why make a joke about

1567
01:13:42,360 --> 01:13:45,200
Speaker 2: the cake looking cheap? At really a weird wedding? These

1568
01:13:45,200 --> 01:13:52,160
Speaker 2: people always sow their mouths shut. Now, just for backstory,

1569
01:13:52,560 --> 01:13:55,559
Speaker 2: my mother doesn't warm people. My mother does not warm

1570
01:13:55,600 --> 01:13:58,679
Speaker 2: to people very quickly, and after meeting my husband's family

1571
01:13:58,800 --> 01:14:02,760
Speaker 2: at my hen party, she disliked them. I'm not sure why,

1572
01:14:02,800 --> 01:14:04,439
Speaker 2: but it could have been anything like they looked at

1573
01:14:04,439 --> 01:14:07,519
Speaker 2: her the wrong way. Anyway. My hobby's relative then said

1574
01:14:07,560 --> 01:14:10,360
Speaker 2: he was joking and that the cake looked amazing, but

1575
01:14:10,400 --> 01:14:12,880
Speaker 2: it was too late and the damage was done. My

1576
01:14:12,960 --> 01:14:15,320
Speaker 2: mother flew into a rage and started yelling at my

1577
01:14:15,400 --> 01:14:19,760
Speaker 2: husband's relative. I told my mom to please stop. She did,

1578
01:14:19,760 --> 01:14:23,240
Speaker 2: of course, but she stormed off. A couple minutes later,

1579
01:14:23,280 --> 01:14:25,120
Speaker 2: my dad came up to me and started telling me

1580
01:14:25,200 --> 01:14:27,599
Speaker 2: off for not sticking up for my mom, and now

1581
01:14:27,640 --> 01:14:31,240
Speaker 2: she was crying at that. I just said, if this,

1582
01:14:31,520 --> 01:14:34,679
Speaker 2: I'm done, and I stormed out of my own reception

1583
01:14:35,040 --> 01:14:37,160
Speaker 2: and ran straight to the bridal suite I would be

1584
01:14:37,200 --> 01:14:40,960
Speaker 2: staying and flooded of flooded with tears.

1585
01:14:41,920 --> 01:14:45,320
Speaker 4: This is so so much, so much is happening right now.

1586
01:14:45,479 --> 01:14:48,080
Speaker 2: I can understand why you don't like to celebrate your

1587
01:14:48,080 --> 01:14:48,559
Speaker 2: wedding day.

1588
01:14:48,720 --> 01:14:49,680
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1589
01:14:49,760 --> 01:14:53,000
Speaker 2: I text my Hobby that I was back at the

1590
01:14:53,040 --> 01:14:54,839
Speaker 2: room and I wouldn't be coming back to the reception.

1591
01:14:55,400 --> 01:14:57,880
Speaker 2: I went into our room, ripped my dress off, through

1592
01:14:57,880 --> 01:15:00,719
Speaker 2: it onto the ground, and just changed into normal clothes

1593
01:15:00,760 --> 01:15:04,080
Speaker 2: I had packed. Ubby came bursting into the room, asking

1594
01:15:04,120 --> 01:15:06,840
Speaker 2: what had happened. I explained to him that, and he

1595
01:15:07,000 --> 01:15:09,880
Speaker 2: was pissed off with his relative as well as my

1596
01:15:10,080 --> 01:15:14,000
Speaker 2: parents for making me cry. My parents then turned up

1597
01:15:14,040 --> 01:15:16,120
Speaker 2: in our room, and my mom and I got into

1598
01:15:16,160 --> 01:15:16,879
Speaker 2: an argument.

1599
01:15:17,439 --> 01:15:22,040
Speaker 4: Yay, it's something everyone here like. All of the relatives

1600
01:15:22,040 --> 01:15:22,839
Speaker 4: are just exhausting.

1601
01:15:23,040 --> 01:15:25,960
Speaker 2: All of the relatives are not making your day any easier.

1602
01:15:26,040 --> 01:15:28,680
Speaker 4: You know, if he's already going through a lot emotionally.

1603
01:15:28,439 --> 01:15:33,280
Speaker 2: There's a lot going on. Well, we both cried and

1604
01:15:33,320 --> 01:15:35,120
Speaker 2: then both apologized to one another.

1605
01:15:35,479 --> 01:15:35,960
Speaker 4: That's good.

1606
01:15:36,680 --> 01:15:38,679
Speaker 2: I did leave my room, but only to have food.

1607
01:15:38,800 --> 01:15:40,920
Speaker 2: I never went back into the reception room, and I

1608
01:15:41,000 --> 01:15:42,880
Speaker 2: just sat out by the front doors of the venue

1609
01:15:43,120 --> 01:15:47,040
Speaker 2: until the reception was over and everyone left. In hindsight,

1610
01:15:47,080 --> 01:15:48,840
Speaker 2: I should have stuck up for my mom, but she

1611
01:15:48,960 --> 01:15:51,000
Speaker 2: was already on edge with his family, and she was

1612
01:15:51,040 --> 01:15:54,200
Speaker 2: threatening to kick off if anyone from the husband's side

1613
01:15:54,439 --> 01:15:57,080
Speaker 2: looked at her. Funny again, I just wanted to keep

1614
01:15:57,080 --> 01:15:59,400
Speaker 2: the peace at my wedding because after that my family

1615
01:15:59,400 --> 01:16:02,840
Speaker 2: would never see his family ever again. But we want

1616
01:16:02,840 --> 01:16:07,120
Speaker 2: to see you every day, weekday when we're live on

1617
01:16:07,160 --> 01:16:09,320
Speaker 2: YouTube at three pm PSD.

1618
01:16:09,840 --> 01:16:12,000
Speaker 4: All you gotta do is tap our profile and you'll

1619
01:16:12,000 --> 01:16:15,360
Speaker 4: be let's tap it, you'll join in, man oh man.

1620
01:16:15,760 --> 01:16:17,160
Speaker 4: And there is a little bit left in this story.

1621
01:16:17,200 --> 01:16:18,360
Speaker 2: But there is a little bit left.

1622
01:16:18,560 --> 01:16:24,160
Speaker 4: I got Okay. One, I think that op just didn't

1623
01:16:24,200 --> 01:16:28,559
Speaker 4: really this is not necessarily like a fault thing. But

1624
01:16:28,840 --> 01:16:31,920
Speaker 4: it doesn't seem like this wedding was really catered to

1625
01:16:32,040 --> 01:16:34,479
Speaker 4: Ope's wants and desires, like she doesn't want to be

1626
01:16:34,520 --> 01:16:36,920
Speaker 4: the center of the tension. But a lot of this

1627
01:16:37,160 --> 01:16:40,960
Speaker 4: was surrounded, you know, was a lot of traditional wedding stuff.

1628
01:16:41,040 --> 01:16:42,960
Speaker 4: Is putting the bride in the groom, at the center

1629
01:16:42,960 --> 01:16:45,760
Speaker 4: of protection, at the dead syndrome. Yeah, So if that's

1630
01:16:45,800 --> 01:16:48,240
Speaker 4: not your vibe, then like express that to your partner

1631
01:16:48,240 --> 01:16:50,120
Speaker 4: and be like, hey, is there any way we can

1632
01:16:50,360 --> 01:16:53,360
Speaker 4: cut these parts out or something, or maybe compromise about

1633
01:16:53,360 --> 01:16:54,120
Speaker 4: what we keep in.

1634
01:16:55,040 --> 01:16:57,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think the plan should have been Elope from the.

1635
01:16:57,240 --> 01:17:00,160
Speaker 4: Video, Yeah, I would you would think that's what it seems.

1636
01:17:00,200 --> 01:17:02,439
Speaker 4: Your family sucks. And then the fact that your husband,

1637
01:17:02,479 --> 01:17:07,000
Speaker 4: like most so many times, his family was just being

1638
01:17:07,200 --> 01:17:10,920
Speaker 4: awful and just saying awful things about you and disrupting

1639
01:17:10,920 --> 01:17:12,559
Speaker 4: the wedding and he did not stand up for you,

1640
01:17:13,320 --> 01:17:15,680
Speaker 4: and then your family on the other end is you know,

1641
01:17:15,760 --> 01:17:18,080
Speaker 4: making problems. It's just a whole mess.

1642
01:17:18,160 --> 01:17:21,000
Speaker 2: There's problems all over the place. I later found out

1643
01:17:21,360 --> 01:17:24,960
Speaker 2: my husband's relative tried apologizing to my mom, but she

1644
01:17:25,120 --> 01:17:27,640
Speaker 2: just gave him a cold shoulder. My brother wanted to

1645
01:17:27,640 --> 01:17:31,840
Speaker 2: start a fight with the relative and his family. Oh great.

1646
01:17:32,760 --> 01:17:35,680
Speaker 2: Someone who I had never met before, who was the

1647
01:17:35,720 --> 01:17:39,040
Speaker 2: girlfriend of one of our guests, attended our reception without

1648
01:17:39,200 --> 01:17:42,720
Speaker 2: us knowing, got so wasted and caused a scene and

1649
01:17:42,880 --> 01:17:46,400
Speaker 2: tried starting a fight with one of my relatives. And

1650
01:17:46,439 --> 01:17:49,479
Speaker 2: that my sister in law, my husband's brother's wife found

1651
01:17:49,520 --> 01:17:51,880
Speaker 2: out she was pregnant on the morning of our wedding day,

1652
01:17:51,960 --> 01:17:54,960
Speaker 2: and that our anniversary is special to them too. Just

1653
01:17:55,040 --> 01:17:58,599
Speaker 2: another reason to hate that day. Looking back, we should

1654
01:17:58,640 --> 01:18:01,479
Speaker 2: have eloped and just had a at a local village hall,

1655
01:18:01,680 --> 01:18:04,040
Speaker 2: or even better, just not got married at all.

1656
01:18:04,080 --> 01:18:08,559
Speaker 4: Oh, I honestly think that really quick. I think that

1657
01:18:09,160 --> 01:18:12,200
Speaker 4: given that op was in such an emotional state, I

1658
01:18:12,240 --> 01:18:13,679
Speaker 4: think they should have postponed the way.

1659
01:18:13,760 --> 01:18:15,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think village hall wedding.

1660
01:18:15,360 --> 01:18:17,240
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I think you can still do that. Some

1661
01:18:17,280 --> 01:18:20,479
Speaker 4: of the says do redo. I think you just do

1662
01:18:20,640 --> 01:18:21,479
Speaker 4: that radial moment.

1663
01:18:21,600 --> 01:18:25,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe just your mouths or whatever, like the like

1664
01:18:25,800 --> 01:18:28,800
Speaker 2: a old folksy European.

1665
01:18:28,320 --> 01:18:32,280
Speaker 4: Tavern, find a little Irish to little Irish plub where

1666
01:18:32,280 --> 01:18:34,400
Speaker 4: they're playing some folks.

1667
01:18:34,840 --> 01:18:35,960
Speaker 2: There's a fiddler in there.

1668
01:18:36,520 --> 01:18:37,400
Speaker 4: That's all I want.

1669
01:18:37,560 --> 01:18:39,519
Speaker 2: I'm not their wedding.

1670
01:18:40,000 --> 01:18:43,840
Speaker 4: I think I was in somewhere in Scotland.

1671
01:18:43,880 --> 01:18:46,080
Speaker 2: I thought you one of the backyard wedding. Now you want.

1672
01:18:45,960 --> 01:18:48,880
Speaker 4: The I want to know. I know, not the wedding.

1673
01:18:48,920 --> 01:18:50,960
Speaker 4: This is unrelated. I want to go like I was

1674
01:18:51,000 --> 01:18:51,599
Speaker 4: in Edinburgh.

1675
01:18:51,640 --> 01:18:52,479
Speaker 2: You just want to be there.

1676
01:18:52,479 --> 01:18:54,160
Speaker 4: And I was in like a little pub and there

1677
01:18:54,200 --> 01:18:57,320
Speaker 4: was a guy playing like the fiddle, and I was

1678
01:18:57,400 --> 01:18:59,400
Speaker 4: drinking an old mount and I was like, Wow.

1679
01:19:00,160 --> 01:19:02,640
Speaker 2: This is where I live, this is my home. It

1680
01:19:03,439 --> 01:19:03,880
Speaker 2: was great.

1681
01:19:04,360 --> 01:19:08,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, time my life. Shout out to the Ireland Tourism

1682
01:19:09,000 --> 01:19:10,320
Speaker 4: Board that was actually in Scotland.

1683
01:19:10,400 --> 01:19:13,960
Speaker 2: But don't tell him. I said that I'm gonna retract

1684
01:19:13,960 --> 01:19:17,040
Speaker 2: that anyways. So looking back, we should have eloped and

1685
01:19:17,120 --> 01:19:19,080
Speaker 2: just had a reception at a local village hall, or

1686
01:19:19,160 --> 01:19:21,559
Speaker 2: even better, just not got married at all. The only

1687
01:19:21,600 --> 01:19:24,479
Speaker 2: positive is that we now have a gorgeous baby boy.

1688
01:19:25,160 --> 01:19:27,840
Speaker 2: The day he was born was the best day of

1689
01:19:27,880 --> 01:19:31,000
Speaker 2: my life. Oh sorry for the long post. A lot

1690
01:19:31,040 --> 01:19:34,000
Speaker 2: happened that day, And be honest, is this the worst

1691
01:19:34,040 --> 01:19:38,360
Speaker 2: wedding you have ever read about? Oh no, not even close, not.

1692
01:19:38,479 --> 01:19:40,840
Speaker 4: Even've read so many bad weddings, not even in.

1693
01:19:40,880 --> 01:19:43,439
Speaker 2: The starting lineup of worst weddings ever.

1694
01:19:43,600 --> 01:19:44,479
Speaker 4: Yeah for real.

1695
01:19:45,800 --> 01:19:48,000
Speaker 1: Hey it's sam og host. We're gonnet back to these

1696
01:19:48,000 --> 01:19:50,519
Speaker 1: delectable stories. But here's three minutes of ads from our

1697
01:19:50,520 --> 01:19:51,840
Speaker 1: sponsors to help support the show.

1698
01:19:52,400 --> 01:19:55,760
Speaker 4: My brother kept insulting me at the family gathering, so

1699
01:19:55,880 --> 01:19:57,360
Speaker 4: my husband started.

1700
01:19:57,000 --> 01:20:00,840
Speaker 3: Swinging left and right, left and right, Dodge.

1701
01:20:01,200 --> 01:20:03,840
Speaker 4: Sorry for the throw account. I have colleagues on my

1702
01:20:03,880 --> 01:20:06,040
Speaker 4: main account, and I want to keep this as private

1703
01:20:06,080 --> 01:20:10,200
Speaker 4: as possible, but I also need advice. As my title says, basically,

1704
01:20:10,280 --> 01:20:12,800
Speaker 4: this past weekend, me and my husband were over at

1705
01:20:12,840 --> 01:20:15,000
Speaker 4: my parents' house for a barbecue. The day was going

1706
01:20:15,000 --> 01:20:18,360
Speaker 4: great until my brother, for some reason, started to have

1707
01:20:18,400 --> 01:20:20,880
Speaker 4: a go at mate, calling me names and belittling me.

1708
01:20:21,240 --> 01:20:23,599
Speaker 4: My husband pulled my brother aside and had to talk

1709
01:20:23,640 --> 01:20:25,960
Speaker 4: with him, and the insult stopped. By the way, this

1710
01:20:26,000 --> 01:20:28,880
Speaker 4: comes from Throwaway battle Pit three nine three on the

1711
01:20:28,880 --> 01:20:31,880
Speaker 4: Okay storytime separated, so an hour or so later we

1712
01:20:31,880 --> 01:20:34,599
Speaker 4: were standing around talking with some friends and family members

1713
01:20:34,680 --> 01:20:36,800
Speaker 4: and my brother comes up to me and told me

1714
01:20:36,920 --> 01:20:40,240
Speaker 4: I'm a or His exact words were, you know you're

1715
01:20:40,280 --> 01:20:41,679
Speaker 4: an effing or right?

1716
01:20:42,280 --> 01:20:46,360
Speaker 3: What why? What is the problem for the barbecue?

1717
01:20:46,400 --> 01:20:47,560
Speaker 4: Help me about barbecue?

1718
01:20:47,560 --> 01:20:52,200
Speaker 3: And he's like, I'm just like this potato salad is smacking,

1719
01:20:52,320 --> 01:20:53,320
Speaker 3: and then you get called that.

1720
01:20:54,000 --> 01:20:56,080
Speaker 4: He said it loud enough for almost everyone at the

1721
01:20:56,080 --> 01:20:58,439
Speaker 4: party to hear. All I saw was my husband next

1722
01:20:58,439 --> 01:21:00,479
Speaker 4: to me, look at me. Then I fell to push

1723
01:21:00,560 --> 01:21:02,840
Speaker 4: to the side, my husband stepping in front of me,

1724
01:21:03,000 --> 01:21:05,360
Speaker 4: and the next thing was my brother out cold on

1725
01:21:05,360 --> 01:21:10,759
Speaker 4: the ground with blood on his face. Niama, nice, niem.

1726
01:21:11,800 --> 01:21:14,200
Speaker 4: All I heard is my mother yelling and my husband saying,

1727
01:21:14,439 --> 01:21:16,559
Speaker 4: you don't talk to my wife like that. I warned

1728
01:21:16,600 --> 01:21:17,240
Speaker 4: you already.

1729
01:21:17,760 --> 01:21:20,160
Speaker 3: Wow, you guys got a barbecue and a show.

1730
01:21:20,920 --> 01:21:23,920
Speaker 4: Before I continue. My husband didn't hurt me. He didn't

1731
01:21:23,920 --> 01:21:25,920
Speaker 4: push me hard or anything like that. Don't know how

1732
01:21:25,920 --> 01:21:27,400
Speaker 4: to describe it, but it was like a push that

1733
01:21:27,479 --> 01:21:29,840
Speaker 4: someone will give you when they're trying to pass. I

1734
01:21:29,920 --> 01:21:32,519
Speaker 4: went like one step back, that's all. I'm not mad

1735
01:21:32,560 --> 01:21:34,479
Speaker 4: at my husband. I'm mad at my brother. The whole

1736
01:21:34,560 --> 01:21:37,600
Speaker 4: day he was demeaning me, insulting me, belittling me, I

1737
01:21:37,640 --> 01:21:40,080
Speaker 4: don't know where this came from, as he's never talked

1738
01:21:40,080 --> 01:21:42,040
Speaker 4: to me like that or to anyone that I know of.

1739
01:21:42,120 --> 01:21:44,559
Speaker 4: I wonder what he thought he knew. I'm wondering if

1740
01:21:44,600 --> 01:21:45,679
Speaker 4: he thought like Ope.

1741
01:21:46,600 --> 01:21:51,280
Speaker 3: Something didn't get ages or anything like that. No, no ages, Okay.

1742
01:21:51,600 --> 01:21:53,880
Speaker 3: I feel like if we read more, we're gonna find

1743
01:21:53,920 --> 01:21:54,479
Speaker 3: out why.

1744
01:21:55,040 --> 01:21:57,519
Speaker 4: I think I think the brother probably thought he found

1745
01:21:57,560 --> 01:22:00,320
Speaker 4: out something about Opepe, like she was cheating or something

1746
01:22:00,360 --> 01:22:01,520
Speaker 4: like that, something.

1747
01:22:01,160 --> 01:22:05,400
Speaker 3: I don't know, but also maybe intoxicated positive.

1748
01:22:05,640 --> 01:22:05,960
Speaker 4: I don't know.

1749
01:22:06,000 --> 01:22:06,880
Speaker 3: We didn't get that detail.

1750
01:22:06,960 --> 01:22:09,360
Speaker 4: The bigger problem is that I have to choose either

1751
01:22:09,400 --> 01:22:12,479
Speaker 4: my husband or my parents. My parents are pissed and

1752
01:22:12,560 --> 01:22:15,240
Speaker 4: have given me an ultimatum. I either leave my husband

1753
01:22:15,240 --> 01:22:18,000
Speaker 4: and divorce him, wow, or they cut me off completely.

1754
01:22:19,160 --> 01:22:21,040
Speaker 4: I mean, are they not going to do anything about this? Brother?

1755
01:22:21,439 --> 01:22:24,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sorry. Do you understand why? Yeah, the husband

1756
01:22:25,000 --> 01:22:26,760
Speaker 3: was defending Ope.

1757
01:22:26,840 --> 01:22:29,040
Speaker 4: My husband doesn't give a crap that they're mad. The

1758
01:22:29,040 --> 01:22:31,000
Speaker 4: only thing he's mad about is that he only got

1759
01:22:31,040 --> 01:22:34,960
Speaker 4: one puncheon his words. I love my husband and don't

1760
01:22:35,000 --> 01:22:36,960
Speaker 4: want to lose him, but I also don't want to

1761
01:22:37,000 --> 01:22:39,920
Speaker 4: lose my parents. They've supported me through a lot and

1762
01:22:39,960 --> 01:22:42,200
Speaker 4: I've always been there for me. I know they're serious,

1763
01:22:42,280 --> 01:22:44,920
Speaker 4: as this is the first time they have ever issued

1764
01:22:45,000 --> 01:22:47,559
Speaker 4: me with an ultimatum. They also threatened my husband with

1765
01:22:47,560 --> 01:22:50,240
Speaker 4: an assault charge, but he doesn't care and welcome them

1766
01:22:50,280 --> 01:22:52,120
Speaker 4: to do it. Yeah, I mean I visually, I don't

1767
01:22:52,120 --> 01:22:54,160
Speaker 4: think that what violence is ever the answer. But I

1768
01:22:54,160 --> 01:22:58,680
Speaker 4: also understand that from Ope's productive, her husband was defending her.

1769
01:22:58,960 --> 01:23:00,719
Speaker 3: Yes, and he did give warning.

1770
01:23:00,760 --> 01:23:03,000
Speaker 4: Yeah. I'm stuck between a decision that will change my

1771
01:23:03,080 --> 01:23:06,360
Speaker 4: life forever, and I'm panicking. I have received messages from

1772
01:23:06,439 --> 01:23:08,839
Speaker 4: friends and other family members that have given me support

1773
01:23:09,000 --> 01:23:11,400
Speaker 4: and condemned my husband, but they are leaning more on

1774
01:23:11,439 --> 01:23:14,639
Speaker 4: the support side. Any advice will be appreciated. Edit to clarify,

1775
01:23:14,800 --> 01:23:17,439
Speaker 4: I'm choosing my husband. I have never questioned that, but

1776
01:23:17,479 --> 01:23:19,760
Speaker 4: I also don't want to lose my family. I am

1777
01:23:20,000 --> 01:23:23,160
Speaker 4: very family oriented and family to me is everything. I

1778
01:23:23,200 --> 01:23:25,639
Speaker 4: want to find a solution where I can keep both

1779
01:23:25,880 --> 01:23:27,160
Speaker 4: and there is an updates.

1780
01:23:27,479 --> 01:23:28,679
Speaker 3: We still didn't get a reasoning.

1781
01:23:28,920 --> 01:23:31,600
Speaker 4: We don't know I maybe she doesn't know.

1782
01:23:31,720 --> 01:23:34,040
Speaker 3: I mean, yeah, maybe, but why are the parents just

1783
01:23:34,160 --> 01:23:37,080
Speaker 3: out of the blue, like we're taking your brother's side?

1784
01:23:37,439 --> 01:23:41,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, especially when OPI said he said the effing or

1785
01:23:41,120 --> 01:23:42,120
Speaker 4: thing loud enough for.

1786
01:23:42,160 --> 01:23:44,560
Speaker 3: It, and everyone heard it. Maybe not everyone heard it,

1787
01:23:44,600 --> 01:23:47,559
Speaker 3: but people heard it where it was just like, yeah, okay, weird.

1788
01:23:47,560 --> 01:23:49,280
Speaker 4: We're not going to follow up on that at all.

1789
01:23:49,680 --> 01:23:52,120
Speaker 3: I don't know where the parents are coming from. Like, yeah,

1790
01:23:52,160 --> 01:23:54,719
Speaker 3: he kind of deserved it, did he did? He really

1791
01:23:55,200 --> 01:23:59,000
Speaker 3: hurt him a little bit? Was it well deserved? Yeah?

1792
01:23:59,120 --> 01:23:59,720
Speaker 3: Shut him up?

1793
01:24:00,080 --> 01:24:02,519
Speaker 4: Yeah. I think if I were in this situation, I

1794
01:24:02,560 --> 01:24:04,560
Speaker 4: would be a little bit mad at Like if i

1795
01:24:04,680 --> 01:24:06,439
Speaker 4: Ropio would be a little bit mad at the husband,

1796
01:24:06,520 --> 01:24:08,800
Speaker 4: I'll be like, Okay, that's not how we do things.

1797
01:24:08,880 --> 01:24:12,400
Speaker 4: But I'd also be like the brother is the problem too,

1798
01:24:12,600 --> 01:24:14,880
Speaker 4: Like he started this, he was running his mouth about me.

1799
01:24:15,479 --> 01:24:18,200
Speaker 3: This all stemmed from the brother. Yeah. Again he was warned,

1800
01:24:18,320 --> 01:24:20,439
Speaker 3: if you don't stop, I'm going to shut you up.

1801
01:24:20,520 --> 01:24:21,880
Speaker 3: And guess what, he shut him up.

1802
01:24:21,880 --> 01:24:23,920
Speaker 4: And there is an update. My husband is my choice

1803
01:24:23,960 --> 01:24:26,160
Speaker 4: and I have no intentions of leaving him at all,

1804
01:24:26,479 --> 01:24:28,519
Speaker 4: never had. I know it's early for an update, but

1805
01:24:28,560 --> 01:24:31,280
Speaker 4: I'm more confused now about what's going on. My parents

1806
01:24:31,320 --> 01:24:33,280
Speaker 4: invited me over to have a talk with them, but

1807
01:24:33,320 --> 01:24:35,639
Speaker 4: they wanted me to come alone as they didn't want

1808
01:24:35,640 --> 01:24:38,439
Speaker 4: my husband at their house. My husband refused to let

1809
01:24:38,520 --> 01:24:40,400
Speaker 4: me go alone and said if he isn't going, then

1810
01:24:40,479 --> 01:24:43,040
Speaker 4: he won't allow me to. I don't like that. No,

1811
01:24:43,320 --> 01:24:45,559
Speaker 4: he basically said, with you alone, that they will just

1812
01:24:45,680 --> 01:24:48,040
Speaker 4: pile on you, and that I won't let that happen.

1813
01:24:48,439 --> 01:24:50,920
Speaker 4: So we went together. My parents weren't happy to see him,

1814
01:24:50,960 --> 01:24:53,400
Speaker 4: and my mother wanted to say something until my husband

1815
01:24:53,439 --> 01:24:55,439
Speaker 4: told her he isn't there for them but me, and

1816
01:24:55,479 --> 01:24:57,559
Speaker 4: if he's forced to leave, I will leave with him.

1817
01:24:57,600 --> 01:25:00,640
Speaker 4: I agree with them. Reluctantly, they agreed. My brother was

1818
01:25:00,640 --> 01:25:02,600
Speaker 4: there as well. He had a broken nose and a

1819
01:25:02,680 --> 01:25:06,000
Speaker 4: chip tooth and refused to look at me or my husband.

1820
01:25:06,360 --> 01:25:09,120
Speaker 3: You deserved it, man, He just kept looking.

1821
01:25:08,960 --> 01:25:11,880
Speaker 4: At the ground even while talking. Apparently, what happened with

1822
01:25:11,960 --> 01:25:13,799
Speaker 4: my brother is that he broke up with his girlfriend

1823
01:25:13,840 --> 01:25:15,680
Speaker 4: a month ago. It's more like she broke up with him.

1824
01:25:15,840 --> 01:25:18,000
Speaker 4: Don't know the reason, don't care. I wasn't aware of this,

1825
01:25:18,080 --> 01:25:20,519
Speaker 4: as we aren't close like that. According to him, the

1826
01:25:20,560 --> 01:25:22,360
Speaker 4: reason he had to go at me this weekend is

1827
01:25:22,400 --> 01:25:25,639
Speaker 4: because of my life. Terrible reason, terrible reasoning.

1828
01:25:25,800 --> 01:25:28,639
Speaker 3: No, No, so many people have.

1829
01:25:28,520 --> 01:25:31,760
Speaker 4: Gone through breakups and they don't start you know, saying

1830
01:25:32,000 --> 01:25:35,240
Speaker 4: you know, yeah, calling their siblings' names. Yeah. According to him,

1831
01:25:35,400 --> 01:25:37,720
Speaker 4: my perfect life with my husband kept popping up on

1832
01:25:37,760 --> 01:25:39,160
Speaker 4: his feeds and he got jealous.

1833
01:25:39,439 --> 01:25:41,320
Speaker 3: Sounds like an issue, you brah.

1834
01:25:41,360 --> 01:25:41,760
Speaker 2: Come on.

1835
01:25:42,240 --> 01:25:44,800
Speaker 4: Everything on my social media is with my husband. I

1836
01:25:44,800 --> 01:25:46,920
Speaker 4: don't really use it for anything else. But his feed

1837
01:25:47,040 --> 01:25:49,160
Speaker 4: was full of my posts and that sent him off

1838
01:25:49,320 --> 01:25:51,479
Speaker 4: as I had something that he didn't. It got worse

1839
01:25:51,520 --> 01:25:53,880
Speaker 4: when he overheard me and my mother talking when I

1840
01:25:53,880 --> 01:25:55,840
Speaker 4: had a discussion with her over children. Me and my

1841
01:25:55,920 --> 01:25:58,000
Speaker 4: husband are currently trying to have a baby, and that

1842
01:25:58,160 --> 01:26:00,880
Speaker 4: just made everything worse in his head. His life was

1843
01:26:00,880 --> 01:26:04,000
Speaker 4: falling apart and mine was going perfectly, and I was

1844
01:26:04,040 --> 01:26:06,320
Speaker 4: trying to have what he wanted with his ex. He

1845
01:26:06,320 --> 01:26:08,479
Speaker 4: said he didn't take my husband seriously when he pulled

1846
01:26:08,520 --> 01:26:11,639
Speaker 4: him aside, and my husband warned him. I seriously don't

1847
01:26:11,640 --> 01:26:14,160
Speaker 4: know why he went after me, as nothing he said

1848
01:26:14,240 --> 01:26:16,680
Speaker 4: was true in any sense, and I did ask him

1849
01:26:16,680 --> 01:26:19,280
Speaker 4: why he said those things. He refused to answer me.

1850
01:26:19,479 --> 01:26:22,280
Speaker 4: I asked him why the ore comment, because he knows

1851
01:26:22,320 --> 01:26:24,479
Speaker 4: my husband was my first and everything and it has

1852
01:26:24,520 --> 01:26:27,120
Speaker 4: only been him all these years. He refused to answer.

1853
01:26:27,240 --> 01:26:29,120
Speaker 4: I asked him if trying to have a baby with

1854
01:26:29,200 --> 01:26:32,240
Speaker 4: my husband makes me an oar as it involves spicy

1855
01:26:32,280 --> 01:26:33,760
Speaker 4: sleep and he just left the room.

1856
01:26:33,880 --> 01:26:37,320
Speaker 3: Dude, you imagine being so insecure because you just got

1857
01:26:37,320 --> 01:26:39,559
Speaker 3: broken up with for maybe a good reason.

1858
01:26:39,600 --> 01:26:41,680
Speaker 4: It's show seemingly a good reason. If this is how

1859
01:26:41,720 --> 01:26:42,400
Speaker 4: you're acting, and.

1860
01:26:42,400 --> 01:26:45,080
Speaker 3: You're taking it out on your sister because she's having

1861
01:26:45,120 --> 01:26:47,480
Speaker 3: a happy life and she wants a baby.

1862
01:26:47,280 --> 01:26:50,800
Speaker 4: Crazy, you are like, regardless if she was married or not,

1863
01:26:50,920 --> 01:26:53,360
Speaker 4: it's totally out of line to say this comment. But

1864
01:26:53,520 --> 01:26:55,240
Speaker 4: also she's married.

1865
01:26:55,560 --> 01:26:57,920
Speaker 3: You're a sad little man. You are a sad little man.

1866
01:26:58,000 --> 01:27:00,840
Speaker 3: And wow, the fact that you're like I can't say

1867
01:27:00,840 --> 01:27:03,839
Speaker 3: anything with a broken nose. Again, broken nose was well deserved.

1868
01:27:03,880 --> 01:27:05,960
Speaker 4: I asked my parents why they didn't step in and

1869
01:27:05,960 --> 01:27:08,280
Speaker 4: tell my brother to leave or stop. My dad said

1870
01:27:08,320 --> 01:27:10,120
Speaker 4: he wanted to, but my mother told him to leave

1871
01:27:10,160 --> 01:27:12,840
Speaker 4: my brother be as he's actually not hurting anyone. He's

1872
01:27:12,840 --> 01:27:15,640
Speaker 4: not hurting you. That's ridiculous. He's not hurting you.

1873
01:27:16,560 --> 01:27:18,599
Speaker 3: He was hurting Ope, yeah, what if he called mom?

1874
01:27:19,120 --> 01:27:22,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, i'ms the same with the ultimatum. They wanted to

1875
01:27:22,600 --> 01:27:25,400
Speaker 4: protect my brother. I asked what about me? And they

1876
01:27:25,439 --> 01:27:29,040
Speaker 4: were silent. That's so sad. All my father said was

1877
01:27:29,040 --> 01:27:31,439
Speaker 4: the ultimatum was my mother's idea, and he went along

1878
01:27:31,439 --> 01:27:33,599
Speaker 4: with it. Yeah, it seems like you're a freaking coward, dude.

1879
01:27:33,640 --> 01:27:36,280
Speaker 4: He's like, oh, well, she told me not to talk

1880
01:27:36,320 --> 01:27:38,479
Speaker 4: to your brother, so I didn't the app Well, she

1881
01:27:38,640 --> 01:27:41,080
Speaker 4: wanted to have an ultimatum, so we did that.

1882
01:27:41,240 --> 01:27:43,320
Speaker 3: The apple does not fall from the tree here.

1883
01:27:43,360 --> 01:27:45,880
Speaker 4: It seems like this is basically where we are at

1884
01:27:45,880 --> 01:27:48,160
Speaker 4: the moment. A lot more was said, but I don't

1885
01:27:48,200 --> 01:27:50,840
Speaker 4: think it matters. My husband did apologize to my parents

1886
01:27:50,840 --> 01:27:54,160
Speaker 4: for what happened, but refused to apologize to my brother.

1887
01:27:54,640 --> 01:27:57,080
Speaker 4: When my mother asked him to apologize to my brother,

1888
01:27:57,160 --> 01:27:59,640
Speaker 4: he outright said no, he won't apologize for standing up

1889
01:27:59,680 --> 01:28:01,840
Speaker 4: for me and my brother got what he deserved. He

1890
01:28:01,920 --> 01:28:04,639
Speaker 4: was warned and didn't listen. My mother said, it still

1891
01:28:04,680 --> 01:28:07,679
Speaker 4: doesn't excuse him for hitting my brother. My husband asked

1892
01:28:07,680 --> 01:28:10,000
Speaker 4: my dad what would he do if someone called his

1893
01:28:10,040 --> 01:28:12,320
Speaker 4: wife in orr. My father said I would have a

1894
01:28:12,360 --> 01:28:14,760
Speaker 4: talk with that person, but would never hit someone. My

1895
01:28:14,880 --> 01:28:17,639
Speaker 4: husband laughed and told my dad he was a weak willed,

1896
01:28:17,720 --> 01:28:21,000
Speaker 4: spineless man if he allowed someone to demean his wife

1897
01:28:21,040 --> 01:28:23,320
Speaker 4: like that I do think that this guy is spineless,

1898
01:28:23,600 --> 01:28:26,200
Speaker 4: but I am I would not want my partner to

1899
01:28:26,280 --> 01:28:28,519
Speaker 4: punch someone, even if they were saying things about me.

1900
01:28:28,640 --> 01:28:29,960
Speaker 3: I think it was just a like the spur of

1901
01:28:30,000 --> 01:28:32,640
Speaker 3: the moment. Yeah, and like I said, will deserve but

1902
01:28:32,760 --> 01:28:33,720
Speaker 3: violence is never the air.

1903
01:28:33,760 --> 01:28:36,040
Speaker 4: Events is never the answer. I still yeah, it's like

1904
01:28:36,439 --> 01:28:38,680
Speaker 4: I guess I'm of the mind of if you're going

1905
01:28:38,760 --> 01:28:41,040
Speaker 4: to start talking crap, expect to get hit, but you

1906
01:28:41,040 --> 01:28:42,200
Speaker 4: should not hit someone.

1907
01:28:42,360 --> 01:28:43,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know that's true. For clinching.

1908
01:28:43,920 --> 01:28:47,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, that got my mom read in the face. I

1909
01:28:47,000 --> 01:28:48,920
Speaker 4: could see her get angry. That is when I told

1910
01:28:49,000 --> 01:28:51,439
Speaker 4: my husband it's time to leave. I told my parents

1911
01:28:51,439 --> 01:28:53,439
Speaker 4: that I will be going low contact with them, and

1912
01:28:53,479 --> 01:28:55,840
Speaker 4: the ultimatum they gave me broke the trust I had

1913
01:28:55,880 --> 01:28:58,160
Speaker 4: in them. I understand they wanted to protect my brother,

1914
01:28:58,360 --> 01:29:00,640
Speaker 4: but in doing that, they hurt me. This seemed to

1915
01:29:00,680 --> 01:29:02,519
Speaker 4: take all the anger out of my mother. They asked

1916
01:29:02,560 --> 01:29:04,479
Speaker 4: if I will be cutting them out completely, and I

1917
01:29:04,520 --> 01:29:06,479
Speaker 4: told them that's up to them. I don't want anything

1918
01:29:06,520 --> 01:29:08,240
Speaker 4: to do with my brother at the moment, as he

1919
01:29:08,320 --> 01:29:10,479
Speaker 4: can't even apologize for what he said to me. I

1920
01:29:10,520 --> 01:29:13,080
Speaker 4: told them, if they can respect my wishes. We'll see

1921
01:29:13,160 --> 01:29:15,559
Speaker 4: a you would be respecting our wishes if you joined

1922
01:29:15,600 --> 01:29:18,320
Speaker 4: us live every weekday three pm PST on YouTube. Just

1923
01:29:18,360 --> 01:29:20,240
Speaker 4: tap her profile and there is a little bit left.

1924
01:29:20,280 --> 01:29:22,479
Speaker 4: But regardless of how I feel about you know your

1925
01:29:22,520 --> 01:29:25,080
Speaker 4: husband's actions, I do think it's the right move to

1926
01:29:25,080 --> 01:29:27,599
Speaker 4: go low contact because your parents are just not at

1927
01:29:27,640 --> 01:29:30,559
Speaker 4: all supporting you or recognizing that you got hurt in

1928
01:29:30,600 --> 01:29:31,799
Speaker 4: this situation. Yeah.

1929
01:29:31,960 --> 01:29:35,360
Speaker 3: I mean, sometimes actions speak louder than words, and sometimes

1930
01:29:35,439 --> 01:29:38,479
Speaker 3: words speak louder than actions. And obviously this was all

1931
01:29:38,520 --> 01:29:41,360
Speaker 3: stem from the brother of just being jealous, Yes, just.

1932
01:29:41,320 --> 01:29:43,400
Speaker 4: Being jealous, and your parents letting him get away with that.

1933
01:29:43,479 --> 01:29:46,000
Speaker 3: I don't understand why the parents are just like, it's okay,

1934
01:29:46,200 --> 01:29:49,920
Speaker 3: so that's what siblings do. Yeah, no, no, no, no

1935
01:29:49,920 --> 01:29:50,160
Speaker 3: no no.

1936
01:29:50,360 --> 01:29:52,320
Speaker 4: When we got up to leave, my husband went over

1937
01:29:52,360 --> 01:29:54,880
Speaker 4: to my parents and actually still greeted them politely, but

1938
01:29:54,960 --> 01:29:57,160
Speaker 4: told my dad it's time to grow a backbone. Dang.

1939
01:29:57,280 --> 01:29:58,880
Speaker 4: I don't know what I saw, but I think it

1940
01:29:58,920 --> 01:30:01,320
Speaker 4: was shame in my mother's face, because my dad looked

1941
01:30:01,320 --> 01:30:03,360
Speaker 4: at my mother and she looked away from him. This

1942
01:30:03,520 --> 01:30:05,400
Speaker 4: is where we are at the moment. My husband on

1943
01:30:05,439 --> 01:30:09,000
Speaker 4: the way back home apologized for possibly escalating things, but

1944
01:30:09,080 --> 01:30:11,479
Speaker 4: told me it was time someone told my dad the truth.

1945
01:30:12,040 --> 01:30:14,840
Speaker 4: He said, whatever punishment comes, he'll take and deal with

1946
01:30:14,920 --> 01:30:17,439
Speaker 4: any fallout. I don't need to worry or stress about anything,

1947
01:30:17,479 --> 01:30:19,479
Speaker 4: and that is the end of that story.