Speaker 1: Hey, it's me Michael Costa. The Daily Show is on
Speaker 1: break for the holidays, but in the meantime we put
Speaker 1: together some special highlights just for you. We'll be back
Speaker 1: in the new year on January seventh with all new episodes.
Speaker 2: What's up, Scrub, I'm.
Speaker 3: Ronnie chat and I'm Jordan Klepper. This is Sports War,
Speaker 3: the show where we are legally not allowed to agree
Speaker 3: with each other.
Speaker 2: That's right, I mean that's wrong.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, you're wrong. Let's get right to the biggest
Speaker 3: story of the night. Caitlyn Clark made her pro debut
Speaker 3: and learned everything gets a little less fun after college.
Speaker 2: Welcome to the WNBA.
Speaker 4: Caitlyn Clark, the NCAA's all time Division one scoring leader,
Speaker 4: made her professional debut on the road with the Indiana
Speaker 4: Fever last night. She got off to a slow start, though,
Speaker 4: missing her first four shots before scoring on a layup
Speaker 4: midway through the second quarter.
Speaker 2: Clark finished with.
Speaker 3: Twenty points in the fevers ninety.
Speaker 5: Two to seventy one loss to the Connecticut Sun.
Speaker 4: She also committed ten turnovers.
Speaker 6: Sorry feminists, ten turnovers, and a team lost by twenty
Speaker 6: points in her first game.
Speaker 2: I've seen enough, man, I think Caitlin.
Speaker 6: Clock is the worst basketball player in history. She's tall,
Speaker 6: she's white, and she didn't show up when it matters.
Speaker 6: She's the Jordan Klepper of the WNBA Iron.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna hit you with my car and leave the scene.
Speaker 3: Let's look at the stats here, Roddie. Look at these things.
Speaker 3: She scored twenty points. That's four more than Michael Jordan
Speaker 3: had in his rookie debut, which mathematically makes her stronger, faster,
Speaker 3: and better equipped to open a steakhouse than Michael Jordan.
Speaker 6: About stats, I have a stat right here for you. Okay,
Speaker 6: look at this. Jordan Klepper didn't lose his virginity until
Speaker 6: he was thirty eight.
Speaker 2: Man, you're the good of whatever that is.
Speaker 3: Okay, here's your stat right here each ship. Okay, moving on.
Speaker 3: We are officially seventy two days away from the Olympics
Speaker 3: in Paris, and the organizers are finding themselves in deep duty, literally.
Speaker 7: Huge effort to get the River ten fit for use
Speaker 7: in the Olympic Games. A report from earlier this month
Speaker 7: of the bacteria, including pollution of fecal origin, was far
Speaker 7: higher than the river permitted. Experts say that even a
Speaker 7: rainstorm could raise e coli to an unacceptable level, and
Speaker 7: Olympic organizers still hope that the River Sen can be
Speaker 7: used for the swimming events.
Speaker 3: Ooh, the River Save is filled with E coli. That
Speaker 3: is gross. These athletes are going to pick up a
Speaker 3: disease at the Olympics. It should be the old fashioned way,
Speaker 3: unprotected sex in the Olympic village, the only way to
Speaker 3: do it, the only way to.
Speaker 6: Do it usual, Jordan. I think the Olympics needs more
Speaker 6: E coli? Okay, because if your wall class athlete, then
Speaker 6: prove it by pole vaulting with active diarrhea.
Speaker 3: You love you love, you love eco love, Lonnie, you
Speaker 3: love it. You look the last time I came to
Speaker 3: your house for a barbecue, you were sprinkling ecoli on
Speaker 3: chicken kebab like Salt Bay. You know, hospatiality, which for
Speaker 3: the birds, Roddy, the birds two Stars. I was puking
Speaker 3: all night.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I peep from just looking at your oblom face,
Speaker 2: oblong face.
Speaker 3: Is that right?
Speaker 2: Is that how you say it?
Speaker 3: The point is, just like the fourth of July at
Speaker 3: Rodney's house, the Olympics are gonna be rife with E coli,
Speaker 3: which brings us to j cleps Bet of the Week,
Speaker 3: where you could pick which country will get the most
Speaker 3: e coli in the twenty twenty Bar Olympics, brought to
Speaker 3: you by gambling. Gambling, start spending. You've already won.
Speaker 6: Nah, don't forget to clean your twenty percent bonusos by
Speaker 6: joing the promo code.
Speaker 2: Clipper sucks all cats.
Speaker 3: I don't like that. I told you, I don't like
Speaker 3: that cut.
Speaker 2: It's not you. Okay, it's a different clid.
Speaker 3: Okay, that's fine. Then that's just kidding?
Speaker 2: Is you because he saw you?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 2: I suck?
Speaker 3: I suck you blow? Who cares? We're all dead inside?
Speaker 3: Get over it. Let's talk about sports.
Speaker 2: All right.
Speaker 6: Speaking of sports, a player on the Kansas City Chiefs
Speaker 6: is in hot water and making the biggest mistake any
Speaker 6: football player could make talking.
Speaker 8: Some Chiefs fans are feeling stunned this morning by the
Speaker 8: comments made by Kicker, Harris, and Bucker during the commencement
Speaker 8: speech at Benedictine and Adjison.
Speaker 9: Butcker claimed that a woman's most important role is that
Speaker 9: of a homemaker and demanded that men be more masculine.
Speaker 1: Be unapologetic in your masculinity, fighting against the cultural emasculation
Speaker 1: of men.
Speaker 2: Hey, I say we should listen to this kicker.
Speaker 6: Okay, yeah, they're the football players with the least amount
Speaker 6: of brain damage, and I'm glad he's speaking up for
Speaker 6: emasculated men like Jordan. Congratulations, Jordan, for the first time
Speaker 6: in your life, someone on a football team is speaking
Speaker 6: to you. You don't have to wear that fake vosity jacket.
Speaker 3: Anymore, you, Ronnie, I told you that in confidence moving
Speaker 3: to a new school is difficult. It was a natural
Speaker 3: way to make friends. Anyway, this kicker thing, this kicker thing,
Speaker 3: raises a larger problem. Why do we have people kicking
Speaker 3: in American sports? Americans handle balls with our hands like
Speaker 3: Ronnie's mom.
Speaker 2: You know that's strong, Jordan.
Speaker 6: You know my entire family has a foot fetish, true,
Speaker 6: which brings us to all bet everything wage of the evening,
Speaker 6: Which useless position player will be the next to wait
Speaker 6: into the culture war as always brought to you by gambling. Gambling,
Speaker 6: it will fix everything.
Speaker 3: Oh, speaking of gambling, let's move on to our final story.
Speaker 10: Prosecutors in Los Angeles, a showy Otani's former interpreter, has
Speaker 10: agreed to plead guilty to stealing almost seventeen million dollars
Speaker 10: from the La Dodger Superstar. The US Attorney's office say
Speaker 10: Epe Masuara use the money to pay off gambling debts
Speaker 10: and other personal expenses without Otani's knowledge.
Speaker 6: This interpreter stole seventeen million dollars from Otani.
Speaker 2: That settles it.
Speaker 6: Interpreters should be outlawed. Okay, if you don't.
Speaker 3: Know the language, you should just have to guess hard
Speaker 3: disagree hard, disagree, Roddy. The problem is in interpreters. It's languages.
Speaker 3: We should only have one. I suggest English.
Speaker 6: Oh, big surprise, of course, this is just English. That's
Speaker 6: only language your tiny brain can handle the biggest head,
Speaker 6: the smallest brain.
Speaker 3: Or English English is gonna be the dominant global language
Speaker 3: for at least five more years. Look, I'm speaking the
Speaker 3: major league language here. Why would I go back to
Speaker 3: Triple A and learn finish? Finish?
Speaker 2: That's even a real language, you dumbasted it iss what.
Speaker 3: They speak a Canada, Rodnie, read a book, all right,
Speaker 3: but do it on your own time, because we are
Speaker 3: onto the big bet of the nights? Is this O
Speaker 3: Tani story yet another sign that America's normalization of gambling
Speaker 3: is corroding society. Brought to you by gambling. Remember gambling
Speaker 3: bet now live forever. Well, we're out of time. Joined us.
Speaker 3: Next time on Sports War, we'll be debating Michael Jordan
Speaker 3: versus Caitlin Clark. Who's more likely to contract E coli?
Speaker 2: Not America gambling?
Speaker 10: What talk?
Speaker 2: More on time? Ronnie chan and.
Speaker 3: I'm Jordan Clepper. This is Sports War, the show where
Speaker 3: we are legally not allowed to agree with each other.
Speaker 3: For example, if I say Ronnie Chang doesn't suck, well.
Speaker 6: That I have to disagree with you that, Jordan. Everybody
Speaker 6: knows I'm a bad son and a selfish lover.
Speaker 3: Yes, you left out that you're also rude to service workers.
Speaker 3: Let's start with the biggest story in sports, the shop
Speaker 3: heard around the world.
Speaker 9: This physical moment involving the w NBA's most high profile
Speaker 9: rookie raising questions, Chicago's Kennedy Carter shoulder checking the fevers
Speaker 9: Kaitlyn Clark knocking her to the ground.
Speaker 3: Oh whoa throw the flag center to that? Hey, come on,
Speaker 3: Caitlyn Clark is clearly getting full it. I'm sick of it.
Speaker 3: You can't just push people in sports unless it's football, Hockey, dude, basketball,
Speaker 3: The little Leig World series or being drunk Dad at
Speaker 3: the Little Whig World Series.
Speaker 6: Well, I hope all those dad shoves you into traffic, Jordan,
Speaker 6: because you couldn't be more wrong. As a lifelong w
Speaker 6: NBA Fancy's Kaitlyn Clott joined the league a few weeks ago,
Speaker 6: I can say with absolute certainty that that's off.
Speaker 2: Was barely a foul.
Speaker 6: Hey, the WNBA needs to get horder if they want
Speaker 6: me they're target demographic to keep watching.
Speaker 2: Okay, you hear that, WNBA.
Speaker 6: Just because you don't have a penis doesn't mean you
Speaker 6: can't get hard.
Speaker 3: Just ask Jordan, are you saying my penis is soft
Speaker 3: or non existent?
Speaker 2: Whichever hurt your feelings?
Speaker 3: More chokes on you? Ronnie, I'm dead inside. Look. I
Speaker 3: relate to Caitlin Clark, a superstar at the top of
Speaker 3: her game, surrounded by jealous peers. Caitlin, I see you,
Speaker 3: I am you, and we're not going to let bottom
Speaker 3: feeders like Ronnie Chang push us around, which brings us
Speaker 3: to Tonight's Jake Cleps can't lose Better of the Week.
Speaker 3: What's the source of Ronnie Chang's crippling inferiority complex? Front
Speaker 3: of you by gambling. Gambling, you can only lose if
Speaker 3: you stop. Okay.
Speaker 6: Moving on from the greatest women's basketball player to the
Speaker 6: greatest men's basketball player's son, Bronnie James, the son.
Speaker 11: Of the NBA's superstar Lebron James, will remain in the
Speaker 11: NBA draft. His agent confirmed his decision today. James will
Speaker 11: forego his college eligibility after playing one season with USC.
Speaker 11: Lebron and Bronnie James could be the first father and
Speaker 11: son do it to play at the same time in
Speaker 11: the NBA.
Speaker 1: He's projected to be a second round pick, primarily because
Speaker 1: his father is Lebron James.
Speaker 6: Yo, Bronni should not enter the NBA at all. Okay,
Speaker 6: it to zero chance. You canna live up to his
Speaker 6: legacy of his father. Go do something else, like being
Speaker 6: a tall dentist or a tall architect or a medium
Speaker 6: sized wolf's tallest man.
Speaker 2: Quick wall, You're not a head.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, that's good advice, Ronnie. You should take it.
Speaker 3: Of course, Bronnie should join the NBA. The children of
Speaker 3: great people are always great themselves. Done Junior RFK Junior,
Speaker 3: Carls Junior.
Speaker 2: Oh good night.
Speaker 3: The only pressure here is on Lebron If his sperm
Speaker 3: can't produce a twelve time NBA All Star reinvigorates the
Speaker 3: Space Jam franchise at raided over rated.
Speaker 2: That's just what your mom said to me last night.
Speaker 3: So you mad you made love to my mother poorly?
Speaker 6: Like I said, Jordan, I'm a selfish lover, which brings
Speaker 6: us to Ronnie's slim dumk bed of the Night.
Speaker 2: Who will be.
Speaker 6: A greater disappointment to that father? Ronnie James L Jordan Klepper.
Speaker 6: That's always brought to you by gambling. Gambling. It's like
Speaker 6: taking candy from a baby, but the candy is money.
Speaker 3: Finally, we turned to the shocking retirement of a sports legend.
Speaker 5: Well, he has won the Nathan's Hot Dog eating contests
Speaker 5: six times, but Takiu Kobayashi is retiring from competitive eating.
Speaker 5: He says he has health concerns now he needs attend to.
Speaker 5: It's forty six years old, and says decades of overeating
Speaker 5: has left him with no appetite or sensation of fullness.
Speaker 3: Holy shit, this guy can't tell when he's hungry or full.
Speaker 3: It sounds like his stomach just pulled a Jerry Maguire
Speaker 3: on him. Just grab the goldfish said audios to the
Speaker 3: kidney and walked right out. Does not sound like it
Speaker 3: was worth it.
Speaker 2: This was absolutely worfic.
Speaker 6: Okay, Jordan, he got to eat tons of hot dogs
Speaker 6: and now he has no appetite.
Speaker 2: It's like freeo zembic.
Speaker 6: Okay, Hooki Yashi's allegen not to mention he's Asian shutout Asian.
Speaker 2: That's right. I've only got to use guy like four
Speaker 2: times in my life. And shame on you, Jordan for.
Speaker 6: Not supporting the walk of our greatest Asian athlete.
Speaker 3: Hey, you are wrong, You're wrong running. I fully support
Speaker 3: his decision to step away from the game, which brings
Speaker 3: us to our double down Better than Nights, which Asian
Speaker 3: that hosts this program will retire. Next brought to you
Speaker 3: by gambling. Have you lost the ability to experience sensation?
Speaker 3: Try gambling? See how worse it can get. Well, we
Speaker 3: are out of time.
Speaker 2: I'm not retired.
Speaker 3: It's too late. The fans have spoken rounding Jorda's Next
Speaker 3: time on sports we'll be debating pick a ball better
Speaker 3: with guns?
Speaker 2: Now you got it? What's up, idiots? I'm right Jang
Speaker 2: and I'm Michael Costa.
Speaker 12: This is Sports War, the show where we are legally
Speaker 12: not allowed to agree with each other. So if I
Speaker 12: say I love Bigetts, then I say thank you Croissants
Speaker 12: for life. And if I say that the best French
Speaker 12: new wave director is Gudar, well, then.
Speaker 2: I say you Truefo's movies.
Speaker 6: We justice revolutionary, but more accessible to a white audience.
Speaker 1: Is shut the few philistine. Now that the twenty twenty
Speaker 1: four Paris Olympics are over, you'll probably miss watching women's
Speaker 1: beach volleyball every day in your office.
Speaker 2: Learn how to knock Ronnie.
Speaker 1: But another highlight was the utter dominance of USA men's basketball.
Speaker 9: Lebron James, Kevin Durant, and Steph Curry teaming up in
Speaker 9: a thrilling gold medal game against host country France winning
Speaker 9: by eleven points is.
Speaker 6: Everything I imagine and more.
Speaker 10: We all sign up for this mission to continue.
Speaker 2: The USA basketball dominance. That's right, suck at.
Speaker 1: France, pack your bags and go back to.
Speaker 2: Wherever it is that you came from.
Speaker 1: This just proves America is the best at the sports
Speaker 1: that we invent.
Speaker 2: Costa Are you drooling more on? America?
Speaker 6: Should be embarrassed that you only beat friends by eleven points.
Speaker 6: You basically lost that score should have been two seventy
Speaker 6: to twelve. These players shouldn't even be allowed back in
Speaker 6: the country. Hey, Lebron James, you stay in France. You
Speaker 6: think about what you just did.
Speaker 1: Ronnie, Ronnie, I swear putting you on TV feels like
Speaker 1: a make a wish.
Speaker 2: All right.
Speaker 1: Not only did Steph and Lebron dominate, but they found
Speaker 1: a way to make it entertaining against a weak opponent.
Speaker 1: And believe me, it takes real skill to put on
Speaker 1: a great show, even when you're out there with a
Speaker 1: smaller inferior co host Cossa.
Speaker 6: You're the tyrese hallybutten of this team. Okay, only one
Speaker 6: pizza of audience even knows who you are.
Speaker 1: Well, you're like the said river just filled with diarrhea,
Speaker 1: which brings us dar Costa's big balls better than night.
Speaker 1: Which river will Ronnie Chang mysteriously drown? It as always
Speaker 1: brought to you by gambling.
Speaker 2: Remember you're not you when you're not gambling.
Speaker 6: Moving on to an unexpected Olympic showdown. It was the
Speaker 6: return of the world's fastest man against the world's fastest virus.
Speaker 13: It was supposed to be a golden moment for US
Speaker 13: sprinter Noah Lyles speak, but instead, the twenty seven year
Speaker 13: old failed to take the lead in the two hundred
Speaker 13: meter event, finishing with a bronze medal. He embraced fellow
Speaker 13: racers before he knelt to the ground, appearing to struggle
Speaker 13: for Brett. After the race, Lyles revealed he tested positive
Speaker 13: for COVID two days earlier, but decided to still compete.
Speaker 6: What an incredible accomplishment for no Allows and an incredible
Speaker 6: embarrassment for the people who trained every day for four
Speaker 6: years and lost to a guy with fluid in his lungs. Yeah,
Speaker 6: why don't you just keep running off the track and
Speaker 6: runing the traffish Ronnie, Ronnie, like my negative COVID this morning.
Speaker 2: You couldn't be more wrong. This was an absolute disaster
Speaker 2: for the whole world.
Speaker 1: He won an Olympic medal with COVID in ruin the
Speaker 1: last ballid excuse we all had to miss work. Your
Speaker 1: shitty boss is going to be like, if no Lyles
Speaker 1: can run two hundred meters with COVID, then you got
Speaker 1: to keep teaching these CPR classes.
Speaker 6: Which brings us to Ronnie's bigg balls bet of the evening,
Speaker 6: which disease will Michael Costla Get next.
Speaker 2: Brought to you by gambling. Gambling, it will fix everything.
Speaker 6: Let's move on to the athlete from down down to
Speaker 6: that everyone is talking about and should to be. This
Speaker 6: year's most popular Halloween costume.
Speaker 13: Is Australian breaker Reagun went viral for her memorable routine.
Speaker 14: Rachel Gunn, the big girl from Australia, failed to score
Speaker 14: a single point during her Olympics competition, going ahead to
Speaker 14: have with some of the world's best breakers during the
Speaker 14: sports Olympic debut.
Speaker 15: Her signature moves include the sprinkler and m kangaroo hop.
Speaker 15: Reagan Actually he has a PhD in breakdance and was
Speaker 15: Australia's only woman to qualify for the Olympics.
Speaker 2: Wow, thank you Australia. That was inspirational. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's the Australian breakdancing Jamaica bob sled team of
Speaker 1: the French Olympics. She was so bad with so much confidence.
Speaker 1: Some experts are speculating that she had Ronnie Chang syndrome.
Speaker 2: I hope that took this guy shoots you in your
Speaker 2: stupid face, right.
Speaker 6: This was This was a terrible moment for the Olympics.
Speaker 6: For Australia, for descendants of criminals, for dancers, for kangaroos,
Speaker 6: for white.
Speaker 2: People that want to be black.
Speaker 6: It just shows you the pathetic level of talent in Australia.
Speaker 2: You fit in perfectly cause of the.
Speaker 1: Whole fit in a country of tall, tan, hot people.
Speaker 2: And I say good time.
Speaker 1: Finally, as we say goodbye to the Paris Olympics, take
Speaker 1: a look at the final medal.
Speaker 2: Count whoa look at that one hundred and.
Speaker 1: Twenty six medals in United States has clearly won the Olympics,
Speaker 1: USA all the way.
Speaker 2: Oh no, what's that? Singapore is only won one medal? Hey, Ronnie,
Speaker 2: where did you grow up again? Costa?
Speaker 6: You will be a dicta that French poll votos actual
Speaker 6: gift right if you factor in population size, the US
Speaker 6: actually finished fifty nineth.
Speaker 2: In medals pla capitol and by that that took you know,
Speaker 2: bootballed almost fifty times better than the US.
Speaker 1: Granada, Ronnie, you idiot, it's pronounced Canada. Learn the language,
Speaker 1: bringing us two our free ball in college fund quadrupler
Speaker 1: bet of the evening, Which country that Ronnie grew up
Speaker 1: in will embarrass themselves at the twenty twenty eight Olympics
Speaker 1: brought to you by gambling.
Speaker 2: It's not an addiction if you win, all right, Well,
Speaker 2: lot of time.
Speaker 1: Join us next time on sports Well, we're gonna debate
Speaker 1: if Simon Miles is so good, why isn't she tallow?
Speaker 3: You're tall and you saw what.
Speaker 2: Top morons?
Speaker 3: I'm Ryan Chance, Jordan Klapper. This is Sports War, the
Speaker 3: show where we are legally not allowed.
Speaker 2: To agree with each other.
Speaker 6: So if I say we need stronger helmets and football
Speaker 6: to prevent concussions.
Speaker 3: I say that we were bored with a helmet. It's
Speaker 3: called a skull.
Speaker 2: Well, lucky for us, yours is empty.
Speaker 6: You it's October, but one month where practically every league
Speaker 6: is going out of it like some kind of sports
Speaker 6: gang bang.
Speaker 3: That's right, there's more balls flying around than that time
Speaker 3: Ronnie wore his Daisy Dukes to the office.
Speaker 2: Well, that's on you for looking.
Speaker 3: And nowhere is the sports gangpang hotter it right now
Speaker 3: than here in New York, between the Liberty, the Mets,
Speaker 3: the Yankees, the NIXT. This city could only be happier
Speaker 3: if Ronnie announced he was leaving it.
Speaker 6: Well, if I ever leave, it's because your mom is
Speaker 6: getting too clinging.
Speaker 3: Nice one, Ronnie. I hope you get circumcised in your sleep. Well,
Speaker 3: many and New York sports fans are celebrating, and there's
Speaker 3: one team showing us that Boeing ain't the only one
Speaker 3: with imploding Jets.
Speaker 16: Now to breaking news in sports, the Jets have fired
Speaker 16: their head coach Robert Salad just five games into the season,
Speaker 16: a move that comes two days after they just lost
Speaker 16: in London in disappointing fashion.
Speaker 5: There is rampant speculation that Aaron Rodgers is behind the
Speaker 5: firing of Sala.
Speaker 3: Jay E t s suck, suck, suck. Oh man, what
Speaker 3: a terrible move by the Jets. Coach. Sala wasn't the problem.
Speaker 3: It's clearly Aaron Rodgers. That's like me firing the camera
Speaker 3: guy for the stupid shit that comes out of Ronning's mouth.
Speaker 6: Yeah, well, your mouth looks like a fish vagina and
Speaker 6: you could be more wronged. Okay, firing Slah is exactly
Speaker 6: what the Jets need. For fifty five years they sucked
Speaker 6: with a coach. Hey, maybe it's time to play without one.
Speaker 6: Just one season raw dogging it without a coach, and hey,
Speaker 6: maybe the Jets will win the Super Bowl.
Speaker 3: The only thing getting raw doctor your brain. You can't
Speaker 3: let a bunch of NFL players coach themselves. They need
Speaker 3: Google Maps just to get out of the huddle. But
Speaker 3: we all know there's only one, maybe two people crazy
Speaker 3: enough to take a job coaching the Jets, which brings
Speaker 3: us to our Jordan Klepper, locked and loaded triple VIP
Speaker 3: better than Night, which Menendez brother will be the next
Speaker 3: coach off the Jets. As always brought to you by gambling. Gambling.
Speaker 3: If you think you have a problem, stop thinking.
Speaker 6: Moving on from an upset man to the upset of
Speaker 6: the year.
Speaker 17: Next, a once in a lifetime upset in college football.
Speaker 17: Vanderbilt beat number one Alabama on Saturday, forty to thirty five.
Speaker 17: Vanderbilt students were so excited they tore down one of
Speaker 17: the goalposts and carried it a couple miles into downtown Nashville.
Speaker 17: Then they tossed it into the Cumberland River.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, okay, raid it in you private school nerds waiting.
Speaker 3: It's exciting, but show a little class. You don't gloat
Speaker 3: in front of the other teams fans. You bully them
Speaker 3: online like a normal person.
Speaker 6: Okay, Jordan, I know you're not used to winning, but
Speaker 6: this is what it looks like. Okay, you're just mad
Speaker 6: they threw the goalpost in the river because you empathize
Speaker 6: with long, skinny, useless things, which brings us to Rodney
Speaker 6: Chang show win VVIP better than Night?
Speaker 2: Which river will we dumb?
Speaker 6: Jordan in after Tonight's show as always brought to you.
Speaker 2: By gambling, gambling your wife can't leave you if you.
Speaker 3: Win, and finally moving on to a more somber story
Speaker 3: as we honor the passing of one of America's greatest heroes.
Speaker 1: Pete Rose, major League Baseball's all time hits leader, who
Speaker 1: was famously banned from the sport for gambling, has died.
Speaker 8: Rose was famously banned from the Baseball Hall of Fame
Speaker 8: for gambling allegations. He denied those allegations for years before
Speaker 8: eventually admitting that he did that on baseball, both as
Speaker 8: a player and.
Speaker 16: As a manager, all while he lobbied to be considered
Speaker 16: for the Hall of Fame, his lifelong wish never granted.
Speaker 3: Now, I don't want to discount what Jackie Robinson did,
Speaker 3: but what Pete Rose accomplished was a billion times more important.
Speaker 3: He's a legend in two of America's pastimes, gambling as
Speaker 3: a player and gambling as a coach. Pete Rose definitely
Speaker 3: belongs in the Baseball.
Speaker 6: Hall of Fame, Jordan, have you been hitting your oblong
Speaker 6: head by another pitch? Okay, Pete Rose doesn't belong in
Speaker 6: the Baseball Hall of Fame.
Speaker 2: A huer like him belongs in every hall of.
Speaker 6: Fame, Baseball, basketball, rock and roll, hip hop, automotive Bobby's
Speaker 6: put his name on a Vietnam memorial everywhere. Yo, they
Speaker 6: should hang his bookie's phone number from the rafters.
Speaker 3: Boy, Ronnie, I really wish God took you instead of
Speaker 3: Pete Rose. Which brings us to my Jordan's champagne room
Speaker 3: boom bed of the Knights. What will Pete Rose gamble on?
Speaker 3: First Heaven as always brought to you by gambling? Gambling
Speaker 3: when it stuff being fun is when it gets good?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 6: And that's all the stories this week. Join us next
Speaker 6: time on Sports War.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we'll debate if it counts as cheating on your
Speaker 3: wife if you do it with a tackling dumby, well
Speaker 3: obviously not.
Speaker 2: Wait do we agree on this one?
Speaker 6: Wait?
Speaker 2: You know we can't have