WEBVTT - INTERVIEW: Malcolm Jenkins Talks Colin Kaepernick, Confrontation With Eric Reid , Pro Athlete To Author + More 0:00:00.440 --> 0:00:02.520 Wake that ass up in the morning. 0:00:02.680 --> 0:00:04.000 The Breakfast Club. 0:00:05.200 --> 0:00:05.520 Morning. 0:00:05.519 --> 0:00:08.680 Everybody's dej n V. Charlamage the guy we are the 0:00:08.720 --> 0:00:11.520 Breakfast Club. We got a special guest in the building. Yes, indeed, 0:00:11.640 --> 0:00:12.760 brother Malcolm Jenkins. 0:00:12.800 --> 0:00:14.480 Welcome, Brother, appreciate y'all having me. 0:00:14.520 --> 0:00:16.400 How you're doing I'm blessed Black and Holly favorite. How 0:00:16.400 --> 0:00:17.439 you doing doing well? 0:00:17.480 --> 0:00:17.880 Doing well? 0:00:18.000 --> 0:00:20.280 Malcolm got a new book I'll called What Winners Won't 0:00:20.320 --> 0:00:22.599 Tell You. I love that title. Break that title done. 0:00:22.960 --> 0:00:23.160 Yeah. 0:00:23.200 --> 0:00:24.680 I mean, you know, a lot of the times we 0:00:24.760 --> 0:00:27.760 see people who have a lot of success, who are champions, 0:00:27.800 --> 0:00:30.080 and we hold them up high, but oftentimes we don't see, 0:00:30.400 --> 0:00:33.440 you know, what makes them that way, and oftentimes we 0:00:33.600 --> 0:00:36.400 kind of glorify that that process and we look at 0:00:36.400 --> 0:00:38.919 the end of you know, the end result. But for me, 0:00:39.000 --> 0:00:41.240 I've always been a bridge a bridge builder, and wanted 0:00:41.280 --> 0:00:44.400 to make sure that I contextualized the thirteen year career 0:00:44.400 --> 0:00:46.080 that I've just finished, you know, all of the things 0:00:46.080 --> 0:00:50.479 that I've kind of accomplished by showcasing that journey, that process, 0:00:50.560 --> 0:00:53.880 that evolution of you know, a man into what you 0:00:53.920 --> 0:00:56.320 see now, and really that's you know, that's to me, 0:00:56.400 --> 0:00:56.920 that's what. 0:00:56.800 --> 0:00:58.240 You what you want to do. That's what you want 0:00:58.240 --> 0:00:59.560 to live. You want to have impact on things. You 0:00:59.600 --> 0:01:02.720 want to leave people with breadcrumbs to that success. Uh. 0:01:02.800 --> 0:01:04.400 And so I kind of open up the reason I 0:01:04.440 --> 0:01:06.119 don't have a shirt on on the covers because it's 0:01:06.120 --> 0:01:08.959 it's a very vulnerable memoir. It's one of the things 0:01:09.120 --> 0:01:11.760 I showed kind of the failures, the process, how I developed, 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:14.640 you know, into the person I am today. 0:01:14.720 --> 0:01:17.160 Nobody he played in the NFL. 0:01:17.400 --> 0:01:19.959 Former NFL player, You got drafted with New Orleans and 0:01:19.959 --> 0:01:21.440 then you played for the Eagles. 0:01:23.520 --> 0:01:30.560 You got no not at all at all. We know 0:01:30.600 --> 0:01:32.640 what's gonna happen at the end of the year, go 0:01:32.760 --> 0:01:34.560 to He said that every year. 0:01:34.640 --> 0:01:38.200 Every year he says that, But you said that last year, 0:01:41.720 --> 0:01:44.240 said that last year. Now, what made you want to 0:01:44.240 --> 0:01:46.120 write this book? Now you talk about the winning and 0:01:46.240 --> 0:01:49.000 losing and being so open and vulnerable. What made you 0:01:49.000 --> 0:01:50.000 want to write the book at this time? 0:01:50.280 --> 0:01:52.160 So, you know, one of the things is an athlete, 0:01:52.280 --> 0:01:55.760 your your life is usually documented by other people. Everybody 0:01:55.760 --> 0:01:58.120 else writes about you, talks about you, and we rarely 0:01:58.160 --> 0:02:00.400 get to hear the athlete talk about that own. 0:02:00.280 --> 0:02:02.280 Experience and contextualizing for themselves. 0:02:02.400 --> 0:02:04.680 I got two young daughters, like you know that I 0:02:04.680 --> 0:02:06.720 think a lot about what they what I want to 0:02:06.800 --> 0:02:08.320 leave to them, how I want them to view me, 0:02:08.760 --> 0:02:10.840 And so I figured it was better for my story 0:02:10.840 --> 0:02:12.840 to be told from my own words. So I ended 0:02:12.919 --> 0:02:15.480 up writing a book myself. You know, Cover to cover 0:02:15.639 --> 0:02:17.880 is all me, and it's and it's one of those 0:02:17.880 --> 0:02:21.120 things that I'm always involved in everything I do, so 0:02:21.840 --> 0:02:23.519 you know, for me, it's one of those things that 0:02:23.560 --> 0:02:26.639 again everybody doesn't get to see what goes into the process, 0:02:26.680 --> 0:02:30.480 that goes into the mindset, the cerebral parts of not 0:02:30.480 --> 0:02:31.600 only football. 0:02:31.200 --> 0:02:32.360 But life, the failures. 0:02:32.520 --> 0:02:34.880 And I think that that's always been important for the 0:02:34.919 --> 0:02:36.720 people I know who are watching me to see that 0:02:36.840 --> 0:02:40.079 part of it, because that's the difference. You know, most 0:02:40.080 --> 0:02:41.839 of the time, they'll you'll see somebody at the top 0:02:41.840 --> 0:02:44.160 and you you think you can't get there. You seem 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:47.080 so different, you know, so far from your example. And 0:02:47.120 --> 0:02:49.640 hopefully this kind of closes that gap for the reader 0:02:49.680 --> 0:02:52.160 to see, like, no, these people who have success are 0:02:52.280 --> 0:02:54.920 just like you. They go through trials, they go through tripulations. 0:02:55.040 --> 0:02:57.359 Is those who continue to fight, those continue to play, 0:02:57.680 --> 0:03:00.120 you know, the idea, You know that life is this journey. 0:03:00.200 --> 0:03:02.680 You don't especially with sports, I think life is like 0:03:02.720 --> 0:03:06.280 a game. We tend to only enjoy life or the 0:03:06.360 --> 0:03:09.480 game after we've won. The victory is when you get 0:03:09.520 --> 0:03:12.040 to enjoy life. But really the winners will tell you 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:16.200 that you enjoyed playing the game. In life, you have 0:03:16.240 --> 0:03:19.560 to enjoy where your feet are, enjoy the process, regardless 0:03:19.560 --> 0:03:22.040 of the results. And really that's how I've lived my life. 0:03:22.080 --> 0:03:24.160 That's how I've grown to have success, and I try 0:03:24.160 --> 0:03:25.000 to live that every day. 0:03:25.200 --> 0:03:27.600 I love in the book you talk about a lot 0:03:27.639 --> 0:03:28.840 of the things you did as far as in the 0:03:28.880 --> 0:03:31.959 social justice space because you were the head of the players. 0:03:32.280 --> 0:03:34.440 When it comes to social justice and being an athlete, 0:03:34.440 --> 0:03:35.520 what's the balance. 0:03:35.840 --> 0:03:36.600 Man, it's you know. 0:03:36.680 --> 0:03:38.680 One of the things we had to do was find 0:03:38.880 --> 0:03:41.560 what our role was, you know, because we're not the experts. 0:03:41.560 --> 0:03:44.840 We're not we're not devoting our lives to be activists, 0:03:44.880 --> 0:03:47.240 but we do have a role, you know, as role 0:03:47.280 --> 0:03:49.680 models and a platform to do something. And I think 0:03:49.720 --> 0:03:52.080 one of the things that we found to be very 0:03:52.160 --> 0:03:56.160 useful was to place ourselves as conveners. We can bring 0:03:56.560 --> 0:04:01.480 you know, communities to politicians, to police and use all 0:04:01.520 --> 0:04:03.400 of the intention that we get to drop to put 0:04:03.440 --> 0:04:06.360 pressure on you know, those who are in power, especially 0:04:06.400 --> 0:04:09.640 in our local markets. And that's really how we formulated 0:04:09.640 --> 0:04:13.320 Incomboldaan myself formulated the Players Coalition as a vehicle for 0:04:13.440 --> 0:04:15.720 athletes all over the country. If you say I want 0:04:15.760 --> 0:04:18.000 to get involved, you know, with the things going on 0:04:18.040 --> 0:04:20.560 in my community, you want to get involved with politics 0:04:21.040 --> 0:04:23.960 in whatever you want to lobby, here's the educational, the 0:04:24.040 --> 0:04:26.480 issues locally, Here's who you need to push on, here's 0:04:26.640 --> 0:04:29.000 people are power, and then here's some resources to put 0:04:29.000 --> 0:04:31.920 those things together. So you know, we kind of worked 0:04:31.920 --> 0:04:33.920 through that on our own, and then once we figured 0:04:33.920 --> 0:04:35.960 out the plan or figured out what worked, we just 0:04:35.960 --> 0:04:38.640 held the door open for anybody who wanted to come. 0:04:38.680 --> 0:04:40.960 It started with a group of about twelve athletes and 0:04:41.000 --> 0:04:45.120 now has expanded to twelve professional leagues of sports, which 0:04:45.200 --> 0:04:47.920 is far greater than anything I could imagine when we started. 0:04:47.920 --> 0:04:51.200 It have an impact with you know, grassroots organizations all 0:04:51.200 --> 0:04:52.760 the way up to you know politics. 0:04:52.880 --> 0:04:55.800 We's some of the accomplishments that the Players Coalition did 0:04:55.800 --> 0:04:56.719 that we didn't hear about. 0:04:57.760 --> 0:05:00.320 So the majority of the work was like hey, all right, 0:05:00.400 --> 0:05:02.720 talking about the negotiation with the League and things like that. 0:05:03.120 --> 0:05:05.520 But what we were able to turn that into, you know, 0:05:05.760 --> 0:05:09.400 so specifically, and my focus was in Pennsylvania. One of 0:05:09.400 --> 0:05:12.520 the things I was most proud of was we pushed 0:05:12.520 --> 0:05:15.040 for a bill to get pass called the Clean Slate Act. 0:05:15.440 --> 0:05:17.400 And most people don't know one in three people in 0:05:17.400 --> 0:05:21.440 America have some kind of criminal record, and so what 0:05:21.480 --> 0:05:25.520 this did was roll back or expunge those records after 0:05:25.560 --> 0:05:28.760 ten years if you hadn't violated for non violent offenses. 0:05:29.320 --> 0:05:30.880 And we were like, you know, that's a low hanging fruit, 0:05:30.920 --> 0:05:32.800 let's get that out of the way. But that ended 0:05:32.880 --> 0:05:36.200 up affecting like over three million people across the state 0:05:36.240 --> 0:05:38.640 of Pennsylvania. So that's that affects how you you know, 0:05:38.640 --> 0:05:41.280 what jobs you can get, where you can live. And 0:05:41.320 --> 0:05:43.520 it's just that's a very low hanging you know, low 0:05:43.520 --> 0:05:46.760 hanging fruit when it comes to a policy. And New 0:05:46.760 --> 0:05:50.039 England guys were doing things. They lobbied to get a 0:05:50.040 --> 0:05:52.120 bunch of millions of dollars put into the school system 0:05:52.160 --> 0:05:55.599 to close the digital divide and you know, computers and 0:05:55.640 --> 0:05:58.280 things like that. So these are happening all over the 0:05:58.680 --> 0:06:03.440 country Louisiana, Florida, Ohio, all the way to Cali, and 0:06:03.880 --> 0:06:06.599 it's being done not only by me, but obviously by 0:06:06.720 --> 0:06:07.560 athletes all over. 0:06:07.880 --> 0:06:11.000 Now when players with kneeling at one time, how did 0:06:11.040 --> 0:06:12.680 you guys support the players if at all? 0:06:13.200 --> 0:06:15.240 Yeah, well, I was raising my fist and I was 0:06:15.240 --> 0:06:17.040 wonder That's how the player coalition kind of came to 0:06:17.040 --> 0:06:18.440 about it, and I talk about it in the book, 0:06:19.200 --> 0:06:22.240 just about like that moment everybody wanting to figure out 0:06:22.279 --> 0:06:25.080 what to do but not quite agreeing, which seems to 0:06:25.080 --> 0:06:28.120 be over the time and history, a common thread like 0:06:28.200 --> 0:06:30.480 people having you know, the same ideas a bunch of 0:06:30.520 --> 0:06:33.480 people want being very passionate about, you know, pushing black 0:06:33.520 --> 0:06:37.080 people forward or getting involved, but having differences, you know, 0:06:37.120 --> 0:06:40.960 differences of opinion and strategy. But my biggest thing was 0:06:41.000 --> 0:06:44.440 always about the work. I'm like, whoever is about, you know, 0:06:44.560 --> 0:06:47.119 making the change and putting in the time and effort 0:06:47.120 --> 0:06:50.320 to do it. Let's let's collaborate, let's work together. And 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:52.160 we've been doing that over you know, over the course 0:06:52.200 --> 0:06:54.760 of now, coming up on a decade. 0:06:54.560 --> 0:06:56.800 I feel like you took a lot of you took 0:06:56.839 --> 0:06:58.880 a lot of heat back then. Yeah, you know, Eric 0:06:58.960 --> 0:07:01.000 Reed called you a sellout. You know, y'all had y'all 0:07:01.720 --> 0:07:04.920 if you watch football, your famous confrontation during the game 0:07:04.960 --> 0:07:07.200 before the game as well, Like, have y'all been able 0:07:07.200 --> 0:07:08.440 to have a conversation since. 0:07:08.200 --> 0:07:10.920 Then, nah, you know, and a lot of people, you know, 0:07:10.960 --> 0:07:13.160 even in those times, were like, hey man, you need 0:07:13.200 --> 0:07:15.640 to reconcile that, you need to squash that. But I've 0:07:15.680 --> 0:07:19.240 always maintained that, you know, I never wanted to be 0:07:19.240 --> 0:07:21.560 besides that. And I was very disappointed after that game 0:07:21.560 --> 0:07:25.120 and myself because I gave the media that image. Last 0:07:25.160 --> 0:07:27.640 thing I wanted was two black men fighting over you know, 0:07:28.000 --> 0:07:29.880 trying to say that people were trying to help that people. 0:07:30.240 --> 0:07:34.120 It's counterintuitive, it doesn't work. So for me, I've always 0:07:34.160 --> 0:07:36.320 maintained that, like, I'm proud of the work that they did. 0:07:36.320 --> 0:07:38.680 I'm proud of you know, all of us were trying 0:07:38.680 --> 0:07:40.960 to figure it out at that time, but it's not me. 0:07:41.080 --> 0:07:43.200 It's not on me to reconcile the situation. Like, I 0:07:43.240 --> 0:07:45.960 never had a problem. I don't hold any gripes. I 0:07:46.000 --> 0:07:48.280 was always focused on the work. I knew that regardless 0:07:48.280 --> 0:07:49.960 of how you know, I was feeling the things that 0:07:50.000 --> 0:07:51.840 were coming down to me, that things, what people were saying. 0:07:52.200 --> 0:07:54.280 My focus was always on the people I got into 0:07:54.320 --> 0:07:56.960 this not you know, to lift myself up, so my 0:07:57.000 --> 0:08:00.000 feelings didn't matter. It was like, Okay, what's the goal here, 0:08:00.320 --> 0:08:02.080 and it's to help. So all of that to me 0:08:02.240 --> 0:08:05.000 was distractions and I had to stay you know, stay 0:08:05.000 --> 0:08:07.400 focused on the goal why I was there, why you 0:08:07.440 --> 0:08:10.200 know I put myself in that position, and just maintain. 0:08:10.640 --> 0:08:12.680 What was your thoughts on everything that's going on with 0:08:12.720 --> 0:08:14.680 Colin Kaepernick and everything that's happening right now, what's your 0:08:14.680 --> 0:08:15.080 thoughts on that? 0:08:15.680 --> 0:08:17.720 I mean, it's you know, it's confusing at this time. 0:08:17.760 --> 0:08:21.640 It's seven years the way you know, it's you almost 0:08:21.640 --> 0:08:24.840 want him to just kind of like stand on his legacy. 0:08:24.920 --> 0:08:25.160 I think. 0:08:25.200 --> 0:08:27.800 Any the way that it's being approached now and the 0:08:27.840 --> 0:08:30.920 way that it's being kind of laid out, it almost 0:08:31.040 --> 0:08:32.360 you know, it's like worrisome. 0:08:32.600 --> 0:08:34.400 It makes me makes me a little worried. What you mean. 0:08:34.840 --> 0:08:36.840 I mean, you know you're talking about, you know, somebody 0:08:36.880 --> 0:08:39.040 who wants to play in the Super Bowl that's down 0:08:39.160 --> 0:08:41.839 like begging to be on a practice squad seven years 0:08:41.840 --> 0:08:45.320 after later. You know, forget the politics or who he is. 0:08:45.360 --> 0:08:47.960 Any athlete that's out of the game for seven years 0:08:48.000 --> 0:08:49.679 and it's still begging to be in a practice squad 0:08:49.800 --> 0:08:52.280 is concerning to me. It's that now being on the 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:55.040 other side of retirement and having to deal with that, 0:08:55.040 --> 0:08:58.560 that identity change myself, you know that that's that's a 0:08:58.920 --> 0:09:01.120 it's a strong thing that he's dealing with and you 0:09:01.240 --> 0:09:04.760 worry about, like, Okay, how does one handle transitioning into 0:09:04.800 --> 0:09:07.679 the next phase of life, the next chapter, because that 0:09:07.679 --> 0:09:10.080 one's done, like you can't play football forever, so we 0:09:10.160 --> 0:09:12.600 need to see, you know, what that next example is. 0:09:12.600 --> 0:09:14.560 And it's where so many people following them, I think 0:09:14.600 --> 0:09:16.000 we all want to know, like, all right, what's that? 0:09:16.360 --> 0:09:17.280 What's that next move? 0:09:17.360 --> 0:09:19.280 You know, some people would say that, you know, he's 0:09:19.320 --> 0:09:21.480 been playing similar to you, I'm sure since you were 0:09:21.520 --> 0:09:23.800 three years old. So that's all that you know and love, 0:09:23.840 --> 0:09:26.240 and maybe on the bucket list was playing in the 0:09:26.280 --> 0:09:28.079 super Bowl or winning a Super Bowl. I should say 0:09:28.120 --> 0:09:30.280 so for some people who say, maybe he hasn't got 0:09:30.320 --> 0:09:32.040 that off yet. And then some people would say, you know, 0:09:32.440 --> 0:09:34.280 like even Charlemagne has mentioned that he feels like that 0:09:34.360 --> 0:09:37.200 letter was kind of like an embarrassment and the disgrace 0:09:37.280 --> 0:09:39.680 that you know, you go from pro athlete to super 0:09:39.679 --> 0:09:42.160 Bowl contended to practice squad. 0:09:43.000 --> 0:09:44.600 Nah, I don't. I don't think anybody want to win 0:09:44.600 --> 0:09:46.640 a super Bowl that bad. I don't think it's about 0:09:46.720 --> 0:09:50.680 the super Bowl because that's not what we're talking about, right, 0:09:50.760 --> 0:09:52.480 We're talking about just getting on the roster. 0:09:54.600 --> 0:09:55.520 But you know who knows. 0:09:55.679 --> 0:09:57.600 I think that's the That's the one thing that that 0:09:57.800 --> 0:09:59.960 leads the concern is we don't know what the motivation is. 0:10:01.360 --> 0:10:04.120 But I don't know that you know, one is chasing 0:10:04.600 --> 0:10:05.880 a super Bowl. I think it is. 0:10:06.320 --> 0:10:09.080 I think it comes down to and I'm watching it 0:10:09.120 --> 0:10:11.240 in many teammates of mine, like even I don't know 0:10:11.240 --> 0:10:14.559 if you saw Kelsey. Jason Kelsey did a documentary about 0:10:14.559 --> 0:10:16.120 his life last year. He was trying to decide if 0:10:16.160 --> 0:10:16.920 he wanted to play or not. 0:10:17.320 --> 0:10:17.360 No. 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:19.240 At the end of it, he goes through all of 0:10:19.280 --> 0:10:22.720 these things that he loves most, his family's wife, his health, 0:10:23.640 --> 0:10:26.480 but he is so afraid of moving on to something else. 0:10:26.480 --> 0:10:28.520 He says, I can't imagine myself being the best in 0:10:28.559 --> 0:10:31.040 the world of anything else, and so he decides to 0:10:31.040 --> 0:10:33.480 come back. Is obviously playing again this year, and I 0:10:33.600 --> 0:10:35.560 watched it. Most people applaud it. I watched it in 0:10:35.600 --> 0:10:37.959 fear because here you are saying, all the things that 0:10:38.040 --> 0:10:40.600 you value most, you're willing to sacrifice because you're afraid 0:10:40.600 --> 0:10:41.239 of stepping. 0:10:41.000 --> 0:10:42.160 Into the unknown. 0:10:41.840 --> 0:10:43.960 Dang, And I think that's one of the things that, like, 0:10:44.040 --> 0:10:46.560 I know, for me, the opening chapter in my book 0:10:46.640 --> 0:10:49.440 is fear. I've learned to always like step into the 0:10:49.480 --> 0:10:51.120 things I'm afraid of. And that's how I knew I 0:10:51.160 --> 0:10:53.160 was ready to step away from the game is because 0:10:53.200 --> 0:10:54.920 the only thing that was holding me there. I had 0:10:54.920 --> 0:10:58.160 made enough money, my body was healthy, I was focused 0:10:58.200 --> 0:11:00.640 on other things. But the only thing really keeping me 0:11:00.679 --> 0:11:02.280 there was the fact that I was afraid to step 0:11:02.280 --> 0:11:04.320 into the unknown of You know, I've been playing football 0:11:04.320 --> 0:11:08.000 since I was seven, same same type of thing. But 0:11:08.040 --> 0:11:10.200 for me, my response is to lean into that. So 0:11:10.240 --> 0:11:12.200 it's I think there is a lot of that going 0:11:12.240 --> 0:11:14.320 on with athletes right now, and I think with Kaepernick 0:11:14.440 --> 0:11:17.160 being who he is and what he means to especially 0:11:17.160 --> 0:11:19.640 our people, I think, you know, we always want him 0:11:19.720 --> 0:11:21.840 to be the example, but I think it's a great 0:11:22.320 --> 0:11:24.000 kind of reminder that everybody's human. 0:11:24.040 --> 0:11:25.720 Everybody's dealing with their own stuff. 0:11:25.559 --> 0:11:28.280 And oftentimes too, when you when you're when you're when 0:11:28.320 --> 0:11:30.559 you don't let go of something you block a lot 0:11:30.559 --> 0:11:32.240 of your blessings. You never know what the future is 0:11:32.240 --> 0:11:33.880 going hold if you keep holding onto the past. 0:11:34.000 --> 0:11:36.200 Yeah, I never thought I would write a book. Never, 0:11:36.320 --> 0:11:37.720 Never in my life thought I would write a book. 0:11:37.760 --> 0:11:38.000 Wow. 0:11:38.200 --> 0:11:40.120 And it wasn't until like, yeah, you start to let 0:11:40.160 --> 0:11:43.199 go of these ideas of who you're supposed to be 0:11:43.320 --> 0:11:46.400 and these limitations we've kind of put on ourselves and 0:11:46.440 --> 0:11:49.240 you lean into the unknown and say, well, okay, I 0:11:49.240 --> 0:11:52.920 can't tell myself. I can't do this until I've proven myself, 0:11:53.040 --> 0:11:55.680 you know, untilntil life proves that I can't do something, 0:11:55.920 --> 0:11:58.000 I have to always assume that I can. And for me, 0:11:58.080 --> 0:12:01.400 it's just always about like trying to span, you know, 0:12:01.480 --> 0:12:03.160 the human experience as much as possible. 0:12:03.200 --> 0:12:05.400 I'm a forever learner. I'm curious about everything. 0:12:05.800 --> 0:12:07.559 And the more and more you learn, the more you do, 0:12:07.640 --> 0:12:09.800 you start to realize, you know that there are no 0:12:09.880 --> 0:12:12.560 limitations that any of the problems that you have in 0:12:12.600 --> 0:12:14.559 your life, you are going to be a base of 0:12:14.600 --> 0:12:17.839 that solution and you know, and that's a journey. It's 0:12:17.880 --> 0:12:20.120 not easy to get there. That that takes a lot 0:12:20.120 --> 0:12:20.800 of trial and error. 0:12:20.960 --> 0:12:22.440 I love why you started chapter two. 0:12:22.720 --> 0:12:24.720 You started with a quote we must all suffer one 0:12:24.800 --> 0:12:27.240 or two pains, the pain of discipline or the pain 0:12:27.280 --> 0:12:28.319 and regret regret. 0:12:28.720 --> 0:12:30.000 Which one did you suffer them all? 0:12:30.440 --> 0:12:32.719 I think I suffer both until I learned, you know, 0:12:32.800 --> 0:12:37.800 the pain of discipline. I think I think I've gotten 0:12:37.920 --> 0:12:40.560 so much more comfortable in the pain of discipline than 0:12:40.600 --> 0:12:44.120 the pain of regret. Both hurt, though, And I think 0:12:44.200 --> 0:12:46.240 you know, especially when you talk about like even love 0:12:46.920 --> 0:12:49.720 is one of those things. Is I've come to find 0:12:49.720 --> 0:12:51.640 love is like an action word. I take love out 0:12:51.679 --> 0:12:55.000 as a noun in my vocabulary because we often love 0:12:55.000 --> 0:12:59.120 in feelings. But to really love somebody, or even love yourself, 0:12:59.120 --> 0:13:00.000 it looks like discipline. 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:00.960 It doesn't. 0:13:01.200 --> 0:13:02.720 We're looking in the mirror and say, I feel good 0:13:02.800 --> 0:13:05.560 about myself, so I love myself. I feel confident, so 0:13:05.600 --> 0:13:08.560 I must love myself, And so we love everybody else 0:13:08.600 --> 0:13:11.320 with feelings. But when you start to just look at actions, 0:13:11.360 --> 0:13:14.200 like how what are the things you do to love yourself? 0:13:14.200 --> 0:13:14.480 Okay? 0:13:14.480 --> 0:13:16.440 Do you have discipline with what you eat, how you 0:13:16.480 --> 0:13:18.440 work out, how you take care of yourself? 0:13:18.640 --> 0:13:20.360 You know? Do you go places you don't need to? 0:13:20.480 --> 0:13:21.120 Are you reading? 0:13:21.200 --> 0:13:24.960 Are you cultivating these parts of yourself? Those things are uncomfortable. 0:13:24.960 --> 0:13:29.199 They take discipline, but they always expand who you are. 0:13:29.480 --> 0:13:30.959 They help you grow, they help you go to where 0:13:30.960 --> 0:13:33.000 you're trying to get to. And I think a lot 0:13:33.000 --> 0:13:36.520 of the times we try to avoid the being uncomfortable, 0:13:37.880 --> 0:13:40.679 you know, we try to avoid that discipline and end 0:13:40.720 --> 0:13:43.400 up just still being uncomfortable with the results because we 0:13:43.679 --> 0:13:46.080 regret it not having that, you know, not taking advantage 0:13:46.080 --> 0:13:47.760 of those times. So for me, I'm always trying to 0:13:47.800 --> 0:13:50.760 focus on, you know, the end, go doing those small 0:13:50.800 --> 0:13:54.960 things daily that starve yourself. Maybe sometimes it's some enjoyment, 0:13:55.360 --> 0:13:57.120 but at the same time, you know you're moving in 0:13:57.240 --> 0:13:58.120 the direction you want to go. 0:13:58.440 --> 0:14:00.800 Now, you mentioned earlier your two daughters, and I always 0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:03.120 ask athletes when they come up here, if you did 0:14:03.160 --> 0:14:05.280 have a son, would you want your son to play 0:14:05.280 --> 0:14:05.800 in the NFL. 0:14:06.880 --> 0:14:08.439 I don't think I would have a desire for the 0:14:08.480 --> 0:14:09.280 play if he wanted to. 0:14:09.480 --> 0:14:10.959 You know, for sure, I got all the keys to 0:14:11.440 --> 0:14:14.960 show you how to get there and stay there. And 0:14:15.000 --> 0:14:18.480 it's and you know, it's a dangerous sport, but everything 0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:21.960 is dangerous. And I think one of the things about 0:14:21.960 --> 0:14:24.800 me my first first half of my career, I was 0:14:24.840 --> 0:14:27.480 I would get these nagging injuries my neck. I talked 0:14:27.480 --> 0:14:28.680 about in the book, I had to get a bunch 0:14:28.680 --> 0:14:30.480 of epidor shots to my neck. I'm like, I thought 0:14:30.520 --> 0:14:33.280 those were just for women. Yeah, I was getting them 0:14:33.280 --> 0:14:35.920 in my neck to play football. You're on heavy kind 0:14:35.960 --> 0:14:38.600 of anti inflammatories things like that. So there are the 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:41.000 negative things. But when I stopped trying to hurt people 0:14:41.160 --> 0:14:43.720 in the game, I stopped trying to punish my defenders, 0:14:43.920 --> 0:14:46.840 I stopped getting hurt and I played eight seasons straight 0:14:46.880 --> 0:14:50.280 with no injuries, which is absurd in the NFL. So 0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:53.000 there is a way to play the game. There's a 0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:55.160 way to kind of move about it, take care of 0:14:55.200 --> 0:14:59.040 yourself that is safe. But obviously it's it's a violent sport. 0:14:59.080 --> 0:15:01.840 But the things that I've learned learned from playing football 0:15:02.440 --> 0:15:04.880 are things that you know, have made me who I am. 0:15:05.000 --> 0:15:07.520 I think they give me an advantage in any situation. 0:15:07.920 --> 0:15:09.880 You know, you talk about, you know, stepping away from 0:15:09.880 --> 0:15:11.960 the game and being Since seven years old, you've been 0:15:11.960 --> 0:15:14.160 trained to be a leader. You've been training a problem solve, 0:15:14.520 --> 0:15:18.240 You've been trained to go through processes to evaluate yourself, 0:15:18.280 --> 0:15:20.680 to evaluate your opponent, fail, do. 0:15:20.680 --> 0:15:23.360 It all over again, like Live on routine. 0:15:23.800 --> 0:15:25.240 Like, all of those things are things that when you 0:15:25.240 --> 0:15:27.640 get out into the world you see regular people CEOs 0:15:27.640 --> 0:15:30.840 all the way down struggle with Yet we've been equipped 0:15:30.880 --> 0:15:32.800 to do this and been kind of trained to do that, 0:15:32.920 --> 0:15:35.840 So I you know, it's a trade off. You know, 0:15:35.880 --> 0:15:37.320 I think some of those things are good, some of 0:15:37.360 --> 0:15:39.120 them bad. It's just up to If I had a sign, 0:15:39.160 --> 0:15:40.960 it would really be up to him, gotcha. 0:15:41.000 --> 0:15:43.120 And you know Tom Brady wrote the forward of your 0:15:43.120 --> 0:15:47.280 book explaining that relationship, but I would never have Tom Brady. 0:15:47.800 --> 0:15:50.320 Yeah, I mean, you know, we were looking obviously we 0:15:50.440 --> 0:15:51.760 titled it, you know, what, was going to tell you 0:15:51.840 --> 0:15:53.200 lessons from a legendary defender. 0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:55.600 We're kind of like, all right, well, who do we 0:15:55.680 --> 0:15:56.720 get to write the forward? 0:15:57.000 --> 0:15:59.560 And Tom's name came up, and I'm like, guys, like 0:15:59.600 --> 0:16:01.200 I've been trolling Tom about. 0:16:00.960 --> 0:16:03.080 This Super Bowl exa for a few years now. 0:16:03.320 --> 0:16:06.480 I don't know if Tom's gonna write it, but you know, 0:16:06.600 --> 0:16:10.680 and I think about as a defender, who who was 0:16:10.760 --> 0:16:11.560 my favorite opponent? 0:16:11.600 --> 0:16:13.440 It was Tom Brady. Loved playing Tom. 0:16:13.480 --> 0:16:15.480 He always brought the best out of me as a player, 0:16:15.840 --> 0:16:17.560 and you know, he's the greatest of all time. So 0:16:18.160 --> 0:16:19.960 I just kind of shot my shot shot of the 0:16:20.040 --> 0:16:22.520 text and he obliged. You know, that was and it 0:16:22.600 --> 0:16:24.520 was kind of the cherry on top of the book definitely, 0:16:24.880 --> 0:16:25.520 you know, a stamp. 0:16:25.560 --> 0:16:26.640 I appreciated him for that. 0:16:26.760 --> 0:16:27.960 Did you have a relationship before that? 0:16:28.920 --> 0:16:31.760 Really just a mutual you know, relationship respects like an 0:16:31.760 --> 0:16:34.320