1 00:00:04,519 --> 00:00:20,800 Speaker 1: Dreaming Machine. On the brief about the discovery, we're surprised 2 00:00:20,840 --> 00:00:23,759 Speaker 1: to learn that there are any government records that were 3 00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:29,760 Speaker 1: taken there to that office. I was surprised to learn 4 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:36,120 Speaker 1: that there were any things taken to that office. Good writing, guys, 5 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:40,520 Speaker 1: And it's the Jesse Kelly Show. Another hour the Jesse 6 00:00:40,680 --> 00:00:43,440 Speaker 1: Kelly Show. The show in case you're just joining us 7 00:00:43,479 --> 00:00:46,639 Speaker 1: has gone completely sideways because I'm enjoying these and I'm 8 00:00:46,640 --> 00:00:49,839 Speaker 1: gonna keep going this direction. Why because I feel like it. 9 00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:53,120 Speaker 1: And we're gonna have stories now about your horrible travel 10 00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:54,920 Speaker 1: before we get back to the Deep State and why 11 00:00:54,920 --> 00:00:57,800 Speaker 1: we're all gonna die. So until then, it's gonna dan 12 00:00:57,880 --> 00:01:05,880 Speaker 1: in Pennsylvania, go hey man. So I just started driving truck. 13 00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:10,600 Speaker 1: I'm headed from Pennsylvania to Oregon. I sobbed in Wyoming 14 00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:17,039 Speaker 1: and it's like negative twenty and forty million winds and 15 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:20,160 Speaker 1: the field gaels up in my truck. I have no heat. 16 00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:24,520 Speaker 1: I'm breathing. I'm in the bunk, breathing in my blanket, 17 00:01:24,560 --> 00:01:27,360 Speaker 1: trying to warm myself off with my breath. So guy 18 00:01:27,440 --> 00:01:33,199 Speaker 1: finally shows up, gets my trunk running again. Twenty miles later, 19 00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:35,800 Speaker 1: my field gels up again. So now I'm in the 20 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:40,840 Speaker 1: same situation. I'm freezing my rear end off and they 21 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:47,080 Speaker 1: had no heat. It was horrible, man. He In case 22 00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: you think Dan's wonder, Dan's lying or exaggerating, twenty below 23 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:54,480 Speaker 1: zero was not at all, not at all abnorble for Wyoming, 24 00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 1: Montana places like that and when the wind gets a cooking. 25 00:01:58,360 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 1: And in case you, for you souths do you all 26 00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:03,240 Speaker 1: love to call me a Yankee? So for you Southerners, 27 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:08,880 Speaker 1: allow me to explain diesel fuel. Diesel fuel can only 28 00:02:08,919 --> 00:02:13,160 Speaker 1: get so cold and then diesel fuel turns into jelly 29 00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:15,679 Speaker 1: and doesn't work anymore if you have a diesel So 30 00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:18,000 Speaker 1: you guys don't know this down here, Chris, if you 31 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:21,399 Speaker 1: have a diesel truck up in Montana in the wintertime, 32 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:23,400 Speaker 1: what you normally have to do It almost always has 33 00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:25,280 Speaker 1: to be in the garage. But no matter what, you 34 00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:27,040 Speaker 1: have to plug it in. They come with plugs. You 35 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:29,400 Speaker 1: have to plug it in so your your fuel won't 36 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:32,920 Speaker 1: gel up and destroy your truck overnight. And like he 37 00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:36,720 Speaker 1: just explained, it'll gell up while you're driving it gets 38 00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:42,400 Speaker 1: so cold. They're like, gosh, that's just crazy, Brodie. Oh sorry, Brody, Atlanta, 39 00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:47,600 Speaker 1: your worst travel story. Go. Hey, So I was going 40 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:50,080 Speaker 1: on leave right before I deployed the Iraq in the 41 00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:52,320 Speaker 1: Army because I'm a real pipe bitter that can operate 42 00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:56,600 Speaker 1: with me. And we drive from We drive from Marietta, 43 00:02:56,639 --> 00:03:01,880 Speaker 1: Georgia to Frisco, Colorado for a seven day all inclusive 44 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:07,000 Speaker 1: ski trip, and we show up. It snows fourteen inches 45 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:10,359 Speaker 1: overnight that night we got there. We had to dig 46 00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:13,000 Speaker 1: out of the parking lot to get to the ski slopes, 47 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:16,960 Speaker 1: snowboarded every day for seven days in a row, digging 48 00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:20,760 Speaker 1: out every morning, and then the passes were closed that 49 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:23,160 Speaker 1: we came in on. So I was going down through 50 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:27,000 Speaker 1: Arkansas to go back to the house and the mountain 51 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:31,120 Speaker 1: pass was closed and I had to get another seven 52 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:37,080 Speaker 1: day excursion and stayed there and snowboarded for another seven 53 00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:39,600 Speaker 1: days before I could drive back to post. And I 54 00:03:39,640 --> 00:03:41,920 Speaker 1: called my squad leader and he was hot, and I 55 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,080 Speaker 1: was like, Nope, I ain't gonna make it. Sorry, sorry, 56 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:47,880 Speaker 1: they're telling me that way. I'm gonna have to snowboarding. 57 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to stay here and snowboard for seven 58 00:03:50,040 --> 00:03:52,760 Speaker 1: more days. Hang on, hang on, Brodie, let me see 59 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:56,880 Speaker 1: if I understand this correctly. Your travel nightmare is getting 60 00:03:56,880 --> 00:04:00,560 Speaker 1: in an extra seven days of skiing and then hanging 61 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:02,840 Speaker 1: out with the snowbuddings in the lodge at night. Do 62 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:08,200 Speaker 1: I have that right? That's your travel nightmare? It was awful, dude, 63 00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:16,520 Speaker 1: What a dirty liar. Johnny and Jersey go. This is 64 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,920 Speaker 1: back in the eighties Jesse when they had an airline 65 00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:22,200 Speaker 1: called People Dispatch. I was involved with the band to 66 00:04:22,279 --> 00:04:25,480 Speaker 1: have a song called corn Facing Beer, and the idea 67 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:28,560 Speaker 1: was to get a major beer into the video when 68 00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:31,279 Speaker 1: MTV was real big. So I had to get to 69 00:04:31,320 --> 00:04:34,040 Speaker 1: Saint Louis. On my way out, I had a big 70 00:04:34,080 --> 00:04:36,960 Speaker 1: bag of booger sugar stuck in my suit jacket with 71 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:39,920 Speaker 1: a straw plugged into it, and I was just hugging 72 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,680 Speaker 1: on it. I got the old hair at a four 73 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:46,120 Speaker 1: hour layover, went to the bar, started banging beers and 74 00:04:46,200 --> 00:04:49,080 Speaker 1: shot the jack. Got into a discussion with a woman 75 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:51,840 Speaker 1: about religion. The next thing I know, I think I'm 76 00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:55,120 Speaker 1: Jesus Christ. The cops are chasing me through the airport. 77 00:04:55,160 --> 00:04:58,479 Speaker 1: I'm jumping over turnstiles like o Jay Simpston. I end 78 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:02,200 Speaker 1: up doing thirteen days in a looney bin. I wanted 79 00:05:02,240 --> 00:05:04,600 Speaker 1: a cigarette so bad I'm begging for a cigarette. What 80 00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:06,359 Speaker 1: I got was a big shot in the back of 81 00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:12,000 Speaker 1: my knocked me out for two days. Thankfully, my father 82 00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:15,400 Speaker 1: came and got me released. It's a good thing. They 83 00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:18,080 Speaker 1: put me in the looney bin and they invested me 84 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:21,120 Speaker 1: and gone through my stuff. Have found the key for 85 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:24,440 Speaker 1: a locker which had another big pile of buggers sugar 86 00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:26,760 Speaker 1: in it, and I'm in popit down. Four to eight 87 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:31,440 Speaker 1: years in the States and the tentiary. Congratulations on staying 88 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:34,040 Speaker 1: out of the clink, Johnny. I love our listeners. They 89 00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:35,920 Speaker 1: are the best. I just want to do a quick 90 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:38,400 Speaker 1: side note quickly. Just I'll get back to these in 91 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:43,240 Speaker 1: a moment um when we get calls, because I have 92 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:47,760 Speaker 1: meetings now annually, semi annual meetings with all the people 93 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:52,600 Speaker 1: who advertise on the show, like Like, and some I'm 94 00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:55,720 Speaker 1: close to now. Some are friends, like Chalk. I'll tell 95 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:57,760 Speaker 1: you right now. I don't think you'll mind. Seaton is 96 00:05:57,800 --> 00:06:00,320 Speaker 1: his name. He's a big cheese at Chalk. He's a 97 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:05,080 Speaker 1: personal friend, and we get together, we have beers, we relax, 98 00:06:05,279 --> 00:06:10,360 Speaker 1: we talk about everything, really politics, what's going on, and 99 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:15,599 Speaker 1: almost all of them will tell me about you and 100 00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:19,520 Speaker 1: how you as far As a quote. Conservative talk radio 101 00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:23,320 Speaker 1: audience are a little different, and it's never a bad different. 102 00:06:23,640 --> 00:06:26,000 Speaker 1: They are always have a big smile on their face. 103 00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,920 Speaker 1: Ear to ear about all the Ruffians who listen to 104 00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:33,320 Speaker 1: this show, I'd love you guys, by the way, speaking 105 00:06:33,320 --> 00:06:37,840 Speaker 1: of Chalk, they really are our people. And I want 106 00:06:37,880 --> 00:06:39,920 Speaker 1: you to understand I really am serious when I tell 107 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:44,040 Speaker 1: you about your testosterone levels. Guys and ladies, all your 108 00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:46,520 Speaker 1: kind of imbalances too. And I'm not actually making any 109 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:48,720 Speaker 1: women jokes there. It's just that's part of life as 110 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:52,280 Speaker 1: we get older. Get yourself a male Vitality Stack fellas 111 00:06:52,600 --> 00:06:56,680 Speaker 1: twenty percent increase in your testosterone means a better life 112 00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:59,360 Speaker 1: ninety days. Take it for ninety days. You cancel your 113 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:02,279 Speaker 1: subscription if you don't feel better, if it doesn't do 114 00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:03,680 Speaker 1: what I tell you it's going to do. Same thing 115 00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:06,440 Speaker 1: for you ladies. You get a female Vitality Stack subscription, 116 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:09,480 Speaker 1: you cancel if it doesn't make you feel better. It will, though. 117 00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:15,360 Speaker 1: Go to choq dot com promo code Jesse Chalk dot 118 00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:18,520 Speaker 1: com promo code Jesse. Start feeling better? All right? You 119 00:07:18,520 --> 00:07:24,320 Speaker 1: guys are the freaking best. Robert Pennsylvania, Go well, Jesse. 120 00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 1: I was at a four day meeting in New Orleans 121 00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:31,360 Speaker 1: in February of twenty seventeen, right throughing the heart of 122 00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:34,160 Speaker 1: the Marti Gras. And that was the same year that 123 00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:37,160 Speaker 1: the NBA had moved their All Star Game from Charlotte, 124 00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:40,360 Speaker 1: North Carolina at the last minute to New Orleans, so 125 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:43,480 Speaker 1: the whole city was kind of jammed up. And Sunday, 126 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:46,200 Speaker 1: the same day as the game, I had a six 127 00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:49,400 Speaker 1: fifteen flight out of New Orleans and a three fifteen 128 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:51,880 Speaker 1: limo to pick me up at the hotel. Well, the 129 00:07:51,920 --> 00:07:54,200 Speaker 1: limo can only get two blocks from the hotel, so 130 00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:57,080 Speaker 1: I had to fight to Martigrack. Crowd walked to the limo, 131 00:07:57,600 --> 00:08:00,520 Speaker 1: and the police had many of the streets closed detours 132 00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:03,280 Speaker 1: them of people going to the game to get there quickly, 133 00:08:03,600 --> 00:08:06,120 Speaker 1: so the limit took one hour just to go around 134 00:08:06,160 --> 00:08:08,720 Speaker 1: the block and get back to the hotel. So by 135 00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:11,320 Speaker 1: four thirty I realized I wasn't going to make my flight, 136 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,960 Speaker 1: so I called the airport to let him know what 137 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:16,640 Speaker 1: was going on, and they said fine. I got to 138 00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:20,480 Speaker 1: the airport at seven o'clock and the airline said there 139 00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:24,400 Speaker 1: were no flights available at all on any airline that night, 140 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:26,960 Speaker 1: and not at all the next day all day Monday 141 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:30,280 Speaker 1: from any airline, and all the hotels in the surrounding 142 00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:32,840 Speaker 1: area and the city were booked up. So it looked 143 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:34,720 Speaker 1: like I was going to have to spend two days 144 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:38,720 Speaker 1: in the New Orleans airport. Unfortunately, a supervisor came over 145 00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:42,360 Speaker 1: told me he would send me to Houston, where I 146 00:08:42,360 --> 00:08:45,040 Speaker 1: could get a flight Monday morning at five thirty am 147 00:08:45,160 --> 00:08:49,120 Speaker 1: to my hometown, and so he sent me to Houston. 148 00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:51,760 Speaker 1: I got to the airport at ten thirty. I spent 149 00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:54,040 Speaker 1: the night all by myself, pretty much in the terminal. 150 00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:57,880 Speaker 1: Around three fifteen the airline people came in verified my flight. 151 00:08:58,559 --> 00:09:01,200 Speaker 1: I got to the gate, and four thirty we loaded 152 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:04,360 Speaker 1: on the plane. Around five fifteen I heard the attendants 153 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:06,560 Speaker 1: say we'll be pulling out in five minutes. The next 154 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:08,800 Speaker 1: thing I remembered was waking up in Philadelphia because I 155 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:14,280 Speaker 1: fell asleep the whole time. You know that ain't bed 156 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:16,120 Speaker 1: by the way, Robert, while I have you on here 157 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:19,640 Speaker 1: New Orleans, believe it or not. In all my travels, 158 00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,600 Speaker 1: and as much as I love to eat, I have 159 00:09:21,760 --> 00:09:25,040 Speaker 1: still never been to the Big Easy, and I want 160 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:28,199 Speaker 1: to go eat my way through that place. New Orleans, 161 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:30,880 Speaker 1: is it awesome. Is it horrible? I just I have 162 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:35,480 Speaker 1: to go. Oh. We had great meals all four days, 163 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:38,880 Speaker 1: and there was a restaurant downtown right near the hotel 164 00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 1: where we stayed, right now her Marty Gros. We got 165 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:44,760 Speaker 1: some really great seafood and some hurricane drinks. Was it 166 00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:48,199 Speaker 1: red Lobster? You get your beignets there? Also? For me? 167 00:09:48,720 --> 00:09:51,840 Speaker 1: Was it red Lobster? What was your question? Was it 168 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:55,320 Speaker 1: red lobster? The restaurant with some fancy It was a 169 00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:59,200 Speaker 1: French restaurant. Okay, Chris, I don't think red lobsters French? 170 00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:02,800 Speaker 1: Is it? I don't so anyway? Eight seven seven three 171 00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:07,640 Speaker 1: seven seven four three seven three your travel Nightmare stories. 172 00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:10,080 Speaker 1: When I get back, we're gonna do a little deep 173 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:14,239 Speaker 1: state thing here. Apparently all three of the former presidents 174 00:10:14,720 --> 00:10:18,600 Speaker 1: are reinforcing something you already knew and I already knew. 175 00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:20,520 Speaker 1: But we're gonna play it just so you get the 176 00:10:20,559 --> 00:10:23,320 Speaker 1: whole flavor of it. We'll get to that and hide 177 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:26,360 Speaker 1: a treat to press and your travel Nightmare calls. All 178 00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:28,360 Speaker 1: that is still to come. When the world famous Jesse 179 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:36,280 Speaker 1: Kelly Show, hang on miss does catch up Jesse Kelly 180 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:45,560 Speaker 1: Show dot Com. It is the Jesse Kelly Show reminding 181 00:10:45,600 --> 00:10:48,160 Speaker 1: you you can still email the show. If your love, 182 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:51,360 Speaker 1: your hate, your death threats, you're asked doctor Jesse questions, 183 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:54,720 Speaker 1: you can email those to Jesse at Jesse Kelly show 184 00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:57,720 Speaker 1: dot com. This is from the dossier, my buddy buddy, 185 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:02,880 Speaker 1: Jordan Shacktel's substack from the United States. Davos, by the way, 186 00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:06,280 Speaker 1: the World Economic Forum, you know that evil organization that's 187 00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:08,560 Speaker 1: trying to kill about six billion people. We've played a 188 00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:11,440 Speaker 1: million things from the WEF on the show We Always will. 189 00:11:11,559 --> 00:11:13,920 Speaker 1: You have to be aware of them now where they 190 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:18,200 Speaker 1: have an annual meeting in Davos. It's in Switzerland, and 191 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:19,880 Speaker 1: a couple of things you should know. Just this is 192 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:23,960 Speaker 1: stuff I know from doing some digging on this. You 193 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:26,000 Speaker 1: don't just buy a ticket, all right. You couldn't go 194 00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:28,560 Speaker 1: on StubHub. I couldn't go on StubHub right now and 195 00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:31,839 Speaker 1: get a ticket to Davos. You have to be invited. 196 00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:35,400 Speaker 1: Oftentimes you have to buy your way in. I don't 197 00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:40,840 Speaker 1: mean for fifty dollars in the nosebleeds, but people get invited. 198 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:45,320 Speaker 1: Who from the United States of America is going to 199 00:11:45,559 --> 00:11:49,360 Speaker 1: sit in this evil organization's meeting? And when I say 200 00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:52,800 Speaker 1: evil organization. Just know that the World Economic Forum has 201 00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:56,400 Speaker 1: partnered with the United Nations openly. This is all information 202 00:11:56,400 --> 00:12:00,200 Speaker 1: readily available to everybody on what I call on I 203 00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:04,920 Speaker 1: call what they call the twenty thirty Plan. What does 204 00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:09,160 Speaker 1: that mean? That means the complete destruction of your standard 205 00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:13,200 Speaker 1: of living by twenty thirty, That's what it means. Billions dead, 206 00:12:13,559 --> 00:12:16,800 Speaker 1: That's what it means. So I do find it interesting 207 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:22,520 Speaker 1: that the FBI director Christopher Ray is going, CEO of Amazon, 208 00:12:23,240 --> 00:12:27,959 Speaker 1: is going CEO of Blackwalk, Black Rock largest financial institution, 209 00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:32,959 Speaker 1: is going. CEO. Afiser is going, as well as top 210 00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:39,319 Speaker 1: officials at the Gates Foundation, Soros's network in the publisher 211 00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:43,720 Speaker 1: of The New York Times. That is interesting, isn't it 212 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:49,040 Speaker 1: interesting how the world's elites are constantly getting together to 213 00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:54,559 Speaker 1: push horrible things on you, the dirty peasants, our fellow Americans. 214 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:57,720 Speaker 1: Right now, the COVID nineteen vaccines are available to millions 215 00:12:57,720 --> 00:13:01,840 Speaker 1: of Americans, and soon it will be available to everyone. 216 00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:05,280 Speaker 1: The science is clear. These vaccines will protect you and 217 00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:08,480 Speaker 1: those you love from this dangerous and deadly disease. They 218 00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:10,839 Speaker 1: could save your life. So we urge you to get 219 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:13,960 Speaker 1: vaccinated when it's available. To you. That's the first step 220 00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:18,240 Speaker 1: to ending the pandemic and moving our country forward. It's 221 00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:26,360 Speaker 1: up to you. That's lovely music, wasn't it just three 222 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:31,920 Speaker 1: former presidents Obama, Bush and Clinton Lane to your face. Oh, 223 00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:33,640 Speaker 1: I'm sure there's nothing there. You know what we can 224 00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:35,520 Speaker 1: We don't have time to worry about that. We have 225 00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:42,319 Speaker 1: to talk about bedbugs. James and Houston. Go yes, sir. 226 00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:45,839 Speaker 1: One time I was in Galiston and I think they 227 00:13:45,840 --> 00:13:48,520 Speaker 1: were having a sprint break and I couldn't. I was 228 00:13:48,559 --> 00:13:51,800 Speaker 1: looking for a room and I only found I found 229 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,760 Speaker 1: one room and even went three hundred dollars for the night, 230 00:13:56,120 --> 00:14:00,360 Speaker 1: so I got him a room. I will up the 231 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:06,400 Speaker 1: next morning. There was blood all over the bed looked 232 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:10,960 Speaker 1: a lot closer and with bed bugs all in my bed. Oh, 233 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:22,520 Speaker 1: Dave in Denver, go Jesse. I was decided. This was 234 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:26,200 Speaker 1: back in the nineties before pure talk or hero guns. 235 00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:29,720 Speaker 1: I was on taking a dive trip to Cancun, and 236 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:33,200 Speaker 1: then Kozo Mel landed in Dallas, Texas, where I supposed 237 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,680 Speaker 1: to have a night over and then take the flight 238 00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:37,160 Speaker 1: off from there. On the way to Dallas, the airlines 239 00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:39,720 Speaker 1: lost my luggage. They told me to catch up to 240 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:43,160 Speaker 1: me in Mexico. I took off the morning that following 241 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:48,160 Speaker 1: morning to Mexico, landed in cancoun wearing my business suit wingtips. 242 00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:50,520 Speaker 1: Now they didn't have a lot of close my side. 243 00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:52,840 Speaker 1: I'm a little larger guy, and I was able to 244 00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:54,480 Speaker 1: find a pair of shorts. So I was walking in 245 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:58,360 Speaker 1: wing tips, shorts and a white shirt. Rented a car, 246 00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:02,680 Speaker 1: got some strange looks, rove down to Cozumel to play 247 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:04,440 Speaker 1: at the Carmens where you take off from the boat there, 248 00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:08,040 Speaker 1: go down there, and got on the ferry to go 249 00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:11,440 Speaker 1: over there. On the way over, I was robbed. I 250 00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:13,560 Speaker 1: had a bag with my stuck in it gone. So 251 00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:17,720 Speaker 1: I ended up in Cozomel wearing shorts, wing tips and 252 00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:22,440 Speaker 1: no money. Live there. I was going to be me 253 00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:25,800 Speaker 1: up some buddies. Three days later, went to the hotel 254 00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:29,920 Speaker 1: with no credit cards or anything like that identification. They 255 00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:32,480 Speaker 1: would not rent me a room for she Back in 256 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:35,200 Speaker 1: the day, you could find a doctor, American doctor some 257 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:38,280 Speaker 1: type is always someplace in those towns. And I found 258 00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:41,960 Speaker 1: an American dentist who gave me enough money and talked 259 00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:45,240 Speaker 1: to the hotel so that I could stay there. Spent 260 00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:49,080 Speaker 1: three days without any clothes, than the wing tips and 261 00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:53,560 Speaker 1: my shorts, with no money to spend on anything until 262 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:58,440 Speaker 1: finally my buddies arrived three days later. Back then I 263 00:15:58,480 --> 00:16:01,840 Speaker 1: didn't use an American Express. I would have, but ended 264 00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,760 Speaker 1: up okay after that. But a good traveled story to tell. 265 00:16:06,280 --> 00:16:10,120 Speaker 1: That is one heck of a travel story to tell. Oh, 266 00:16:10,120 --> 00:16:11,840 Speaker 1: and you know what, you know what the worst part 267 00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:14,080 Speaker 1: of that whole thing was. I'm talking to Michael now. 268 00:16:14,160 --> 00:16:16,160 Speaker 1: Chris had to leave for synagogue all my life. I'm 269 00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,320 Speaker 1: not making that up. You know what the worst part 270 00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:22,280 Speaker 1: of that whole thing was. That was before he had 271 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:26,440 Speaker 1: great things like my pillow. Think about this, Think how 272 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:29,560 Speaker 1: much easier that trip would have been. If you're sitting there, 273 00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:32,760 Speaker 1: you're rotting in Mexico, you have no money, and everything sucks. 274 00:16:33,120 --> 00:16:37,640 Speaker 1: But instead of your wingtips, you're walking around Mexico in 275 00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:41,040 Speaker 1: your my pillow, my slippers, because it would have provided 276 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:43,560 Speaker 1: him with the comfort and support he wanted anyway, with 277 00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:47,200 Speaker 1: their four layer design, he wouldn't have even cared about 278 00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:49,920 Speaker 1: running out of money. You don't need food when you're 279 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:53,960 Speaker 1: walking around in my slippers. You're so full of euphoria. 280 00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:56,760 Speaker 1: Food and water cease to matter. He wouldn't have needed 281 00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:59,760 Speaker 1: a room, and right now they're ninety dollars off, so 282 00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:02,440 Speaker 1: he wouldn't have needed much money. He could have borrowed 283 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:05,280 Speaker 1: some money from that dentist and gotten some my slippers, 284 00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:09,639 Speaker 1: or maybe even better, he gets back home and he 285 00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:12,639 Speaker 1: gets to crawl into some Geeza dream sheets. You can 286 00:17:12,680 --> 00:17:14,640 Speaker 1: get those right now for as low as twenty nine 287 00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:17,280 Speaker 1: ninety eight. Did you know that all he needed was 288 00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:19,480 Speaker 1: my pillow to make the whole thing better the trip 289 00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:22,000 Speaker 1: and the way home. He should have went to my 290 00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:24,960 Speaker 1: pillow dot com, which probably didn't exist back then, clicked 291 00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:27,800 Speaker 1: on the radio listeners specials and used to promo code Jesse, 292 00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:31,560 Speaker 1: which definitely didn't exist back then, and gotten a screaming 293 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:34,879 Speaker 1: deal on some Geeza dream sheets, maybe some slippers and 294 00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:39,480 Speaker 1: mattress stoppers. My pillow dot Com promo code Jesse, or 295 00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:42,960 Speaker 1: you can call eight hundred eight four five zero five 296 00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:50,560 Speaker 1: four four ron Houston Go nineteen eighty seven and the 297 00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:53,000 Speaker 1: un business traveler trying have been away from Houston at 298 00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:57,600 Speaker 1: LS thunderstorm comes in, cancels the flight. My bunny that 299 00:17:57,680 --> 00:18:01,080 Speaker 1: I'm with from work. He says, well, we'll reschedule. I'll 300 00:18:01,119 --> 00:18:04,440 Speaker 1: take the later flight, not me, I'm ambitious. No, I'm 301 00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:10,200 Speaker 1: taking the standby flight stupidly and land. The first stop 302 00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:13,520 Speaker 1: is Austin. One thing I find out when you're stand by, 303 00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:16,080 Speaker 1: when the plane is full, you get off the plane. 304 00:18:16,400 --> 00:18:19,440 Speaker 1: So now in Austin stuff, they're trying to get another 305 00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:23,240 Speaker 1: flight onto LA. They give me another flight about two 306 00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:27,080 Speaker 1: hours later. But that one stop some Phoenix. Guess what. 307 00:18:27,920 --> 00:18:31,000 Speaker 1: I'm still stand by and the plane so I can 308 00:18:31,119 --> 00:18:34,960 Speaker 1: get off and you sit there. I make some nice 309 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:39,840 Speaker 1: friends in the terminal, but you know, watching the hand clock, gobile, 310 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:44,040 Speaker 1: next circle and circle and circle. Finally that plane shows up. Okay, 311 00:18:44,119 --> 00:18:47,320 Speaker 1: no stops up on it. Guests who's on the plane. 312 00:18:47,680 --> 00:18:51,680 Speaker 1: My buddy that wisely got home so he got to 313 00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:58,000 Speaker 1: sit in the same seat. All of it to LA sucks. 314 00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 1: Oh gosh, Oh, We're gonna be back with more of these. 315 00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:04,119 Speaker 1: I'm enjoying these too much. We'll talk about how to 316 00:19:04,119 --> 00:19:06,600 Speaker 1: treat the media. To New York Times. There's upset and 317 00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:09,439 Speaker 1: we're gonna get to your travel nightmares. It looks like 318 00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:22,080 Speaker 1: there are some good ones waiting for us. Hang on, Yeah, 319 00:19:22,359 --> 00:19:27,119 Speaker 1: it is the Jesse Kelly Show. Nice song selection, Michael, 320 00:19:27,359 --> 00:19:30,119 Speaker 1: especially given the topic at hand In case, you're just 321 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:32,119 Speaker 1: joining us. What is the topic at hand? Are we 322 00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:34,800 Speaker 1: dealing with all the major news of the day, or 323 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:39,080 Speaker 1: taxes or spending or the border? No, my goodness, No, 324 00:19:39,280 --> 00:19:43,160 Speaker 1: we're screwing off tonight. Why I feel like it. That's 325 00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:46,960 Speaker 1: why we're talking about your worst travel stories. I told 326 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:49,240 Speaker 1: one of mine. We're gonna get back to yours in 327 00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:53,560 Speaker 1: a second eight seven seven three seven seven four three 328 00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:57,520 Speaker 1: seven three. We accidentally dropped the call of the gentleman 329 00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 1: who was thrown into Mexican jail. Do me a favorite 330 00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:03,480 Speaker 1: and call back, sir, eight seven seven three seven seven 331 00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:06,359 Speaker 1: four three seven three, because people deserve that. Now I'm 332 00:20:06,359 --> 00:20:08,320 Speaker 1: gonna do something I don't do often on the show. 333 00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:11,080 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna read you a few paragraphs really quickly. 334 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:14,520 Speaker 1: This New York Times article that's titled can Ron de 335 00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:18,840 Speaker 1: Santists avoid meeting the press? It talks about this Miles Cohen, 336 00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:23,160 Speaker 1: a young ABC News reporter, found himself stymied, and then 337 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,000 Speaker 1: it goes on to say when mister Cohen was finally 338 00:20:25,080 --> 00:20:28,000 Speaker 1: able to ask a question about the governor's handing of 339 00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:32,639 Speaker 1: Hurricane Ian, mister DeSantis shouted him down, stop, stop, stop, 340 00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:35,840 Speaker 1: and then scolded the media for trying to cast aspersions. 341 00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:40,120 Speaker 1: The Desantist campaign then taunted mister Cohen on Twitter, prompting 342 00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:43,400 Speaker 1: a torrent of online vitriol. By the way, I want 343 00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:46,840 Speaker 1: to just say, you bully communists every chance you get. Okay, 344 00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:49,520 Speaker 1: that's our jobs anti communists is to bully them. Oh 345 00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:51,960 Speaker 1: we should be nice. Now we should not. It should 346 00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:54,320 Speaker 1: be a mark of shame to be a communist. You 347 00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:58,000 Speaker 1: should be ashamed. Well it's this is quick side note. 348 00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:02,680 Speaker 1: It's our shame that they're so bold. You know, all 349 00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:05,040 Speaker 1: that that communist in your neighborhood. You have a neighborhood 350 00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:07,359 Speaker 1: party and everything's Normandy comes up and can you believe 351 00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:11,920 Speaker 1: I'm bad? Trump sucks these idiots. He should be scared, 352 00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:14,560 Speaker 1: he said, he's the most bold one. He should be 353 00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:16,960 Speaker 1: scared because we haven't bullied him enough. Anyway. Moving on, 354 00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:20,320 Speaker 1: so the on election night, mister Cohen decamped to a 355 00:21:20,359 --> 00:21:24,680 Speaker 1: friendlier environment for the news media mar Lago, where President 356 00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:28,000 Speaker 1: Donald J. Trump greeted reporters by name. Quote. He came 357 00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:30,960 Speaker 1: up to us, asked how the sandwiches were, and took 358 00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:35,159 Speaker 1: twenty questions. Mister Cohen recalled, so, now, of course Trump 359 00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:38,040 Speaker 1: is the one who is treating the media well according 360 00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:41,040 Speaker 1: to the media, and to Santis is being the big 361 00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:44,160 Speaker 1: media mcmean face. All I'm going to say is this, 362 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:49,200 Speaker 1: treat the media like you would treat your enemy, because 363 00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:53,480 Speaker 1: that's what they are. They're not biased, they're not liberal, 364 00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:59,360 Speaker 1: they're not left leaning. They're on the other side. Their 365 00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:03,879 Speaker 1: job is to destroy you. Now from there, it's up 366 00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:07,000 Speaker 1: to you. However you want to treat them as up 367 00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:09,439 Speaker 1: to you, but you better be treating them as somebody 368 00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:12,879 Speaker 1: who would utterly destroy you. Freezing them out is the 369 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:14,359 Speaker 1: best course of action. I want to get to this 370 00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:15,880 Speaker 1: one real quick before I get to your callege, because 371 00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:17,400 Speaker 1: this is actually serious and we're going to go back 372 00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:21,840 Speaker 1: to laughing here. In a second part time Pink Flower, 373 00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:24,000 Speaker 1: she says, that's not nice, even though the girls are 374 00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:26,320 Speaker 1: making fun of me. I'm a thirteen year old girl 375 00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:29,560 Speaker 1: who lives in an extremely blue part of California. I 376 00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:32,280 Speaker 1: stumbled upon your show on the radio a year ago 377 00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:35,159 Speaker 1: on accident while flipping through the channels and was intrigued. 378 00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:37,560 Speaker 1: I've been listening to your show every night and I 379 00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:41,000 Speaker 1: love it. However, my parents disliked the show and yelled 380 00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:43,840 Speaker 1: at me once for a quote listening to this beep, 381 00:22:43,920 --> 00:22:47,040 Speaker 1: I'll say poop. Both my parents are Democrats, and every 382 00:22:47,080 --> 00:22:52,800 Speaker 1: day at school, I'm surrounded with lgbtqqia plus posters, pro 383 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:58,120 Speaker 1: choice speeches from teachers and boys and girls who refer 384 00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:01,240 Speaker 1: to themselves as them and they all, my peers and 385 00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:05,240 Speaker 1: classmates are brainwashed by these radical points. And they all 386 00:23:05,280 --> 00:23:07,560 Speaker 1: disagreed with me and even stopped talking to me when 387 00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:10,280 Speaker 1: I said there were only two genders. You talk about 388 00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:12,560 Speaker 1: moving to a red part of the country almost every night. 389 00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:14,960 Speaker 1: How do I do this as a young girl whose 390 00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:18,800 Speaker 1: parents are Democrat communists too? Please don't say my name 391 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:24,160 Speaker 1: and thank you, young lady. You don't go anywhere until 392 00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:30,520 Speaker 1: you're eighteen. You are already an incredible human being, wading 393 00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:34,280 Speaker 1: through all the filth surrounding you, including inside of your 394 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:38,720 Speaker 1: own home. You keep yourself safe and in your home, 395 00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:41,480 Speaker 1: and when you turn eighteen, you pack it up and 396 00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:43,680 Speaker 1: you ship out and you never look back. And you're 397 00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:46,399 Speaker 1: going to discover once you get out of that place, 398 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:50,520 Speaker 1: that there are many, many places in this country where 399 00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:53,440 Speaker 1: you can be surrounded by normal people and be happy 400 00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:56,880 Speaker 1: and be surrounded by sanity. You just got a tough 401 00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:59,480 Speaker 1: out another five years all right, Look, people have toughed 402 00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,840 Speaker 1: out a lot. You got a tough out another five years. 403 00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:09,080 Speaker 1: Mike in Pennsylvania, go uh sixty five. I'm in the 404 00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:12,800 Speaker 1: Air Force going on C one twenty four and it 405 00:24:12,840 --> 00:24:15,280 Speaker 1: doesn't even look like the damn thing can fly, but 406 00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:18,160 Speaker 1: it does. And it's loaded with all the maintenance. Guysley 407 00:24:18,560 --> 00:24:21,119 Speaker 1: the radar Texas at EC one twenty one. It's a 408 00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:25,119 Speaker 1: precursor of the A Wax planes. Anyway, we're out and hopping, 409 00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:30,120 Speaker 1: and we get to Hawaii and Midway and Wake and anyway, 410 00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:32,520 Speaker 1: when we get to Clark and the Philippines, they send 411 00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:35,919 Speaker 1: this to a Quanta hut from World War Two all Overbrown. 412 00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:38,119 Speaker 1: The sergeants had nothing to do with that. But the 413 00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:41,320 Speaker 1: big story is on the way back. We're in Taiwan 414 00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:45,640 Speaker 1: and Saigon. We're taking off from Taiwan. We're flying across 415 00:24:45,720 --> 00:24:48,720 Speaker 1: again and then all of a sudden, number four engine 416 00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:51,840 Speaker 1: goes out. Well it's not too bad this. They will 417 00:24:51,840 --> 00:24:55,560 Speaker 1: fly on three engines until number two went out, and 418 00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:58,439 Speaker 1: they're fixing the dump off all the actually all the 419 00:24:58,440 --> 00:25:02,720 Speaker 1: baggage overboard. But they find Marcus Island. This all open 420 00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:04,879 Speaker 1: the island. The big thing for it was a Coastguard 421 00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:09,080 Speaker 1: station for Lorraine, which which was four GPS and a 422 00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:11,000 Speaker 1: big thing and I don't know was the shoot routs 423 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:15,120 Speaker 1: at night. We landed there, stayed there for a couple 424 00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:18,520 Speaker 1: of days, and then a C one thirty came in. 425 00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:22,040 Speaker 1: It was the most beautiful thing I ever saw. I mean, 426 00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:24,920 Speaker 1: it's twenty feet from the end of the runway because 427 00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:28,480 Speaker 1: there's a short runway. We got on a plane. I 428 00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:31,480 Speaker 1: guess this is not much of a story. But when 429 00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:34,400 Speaker 1: I d they were going to dump up the dump 430 00:25:34,440 --> 00:25:38,439 Speaker 1: all the baggage ALTI they found Marcus Island. The funny 431 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:40,680 Speaker 1: thing is I joined the Coastguard, almost got sent there, 432 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:44,600 Speaker 1: and then on the way when we flew off from 433 00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:47,440 Speaker 1: the island, I'm you know, I was nineteen years old 434 00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:50,000 Speaker 1: and there's only one bunk and the sergeants sleep and 435 00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:52,800 Speaker 1: it's it was it turned asleep and like eight guys 436 00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:55,760 Speaker 1: ready to jump in. The sergeant said, young airman, you 437 00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:57,199 Speaker 1: can have the bunk, and I set all the way 438 00:25:57,240 --> 00:26:01,560 Speaker 1: to San Francisco. That ain't too bad, right there, Eddie Mississippi, 439 00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:08,760 Speaker 1: go yeah, I've My wife wanted to go on a 440 00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:13,760 Speaker 1: cruise to the Bahamas, so we went to Cape Canaveral 441 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:16,200 Speaker 1: and on the way there, I'd worked the shift before 442 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:18,480 Speaker 1: and she wanted to go ahead and leave, so we 443 00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:20,680 Speaker 1: were going to drive straight through. Well that didn't work out. 444 00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:23,800 Speaker 1: I got really tired, tried to stop, the weather was horrible, 445 00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:26,439 Speaker 1: tried to sleep in mind from thirty five hundred and 446 00:26:26,440 --> 00:26:29,280 Speaker 1: even though it's a big truck, I couldn't get comfortable. 447 00:26:29,359 --> 00:26:32,600 Speaker 1: So we go to a little town called there in Georgia, 448 00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:35,000 Speaker 1: and I get there. In every hotel in this little 449 00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:37,879 Speaker 1: town off of ninety five is booked. Everywhere. Well, I 450 00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,720 Speaker 1: found one, and I'm so tired at this point I 451 00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:43,280 Speaker 1: don't care, so I go in. I pay the guy. 452 00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,399 Speaker 1: He tells me that in a thick Indian accent, that 453 00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,960 Speaker 1: they have a complimentary breakfast in the morning. I'm like cool, 454 00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:52,320 Speaker 1: So I go in. Crash, family goes in. Crashes. We 455 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:55,639 Speaker 1: all pile up in these two double beds. Get up 456 00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:58,000 Speaker 1: the next morning. You couldn't see this when you walked 457 00:26:58,000 --> 00:26:59,879 Speaker 1: in the room because the lights were really dim. The 458 00:27:00,280 --> 00:27:03,440 Speaker 1: poor laying There's a spot between the two beds that 459 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:07,040 Speaker 1: looked like a body had decomposed there. I don't know 460 00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:09,840 Speaker 1: if it was a dead body, not for sure. What happened. 461 00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:13,719 Speaker 1: But I'm like, okay, well, I'm I've got to take 462 00:27:13,760 --> 00:27:15,560 Speaker 1: a shower. So I go in the bathroom, step on 463 00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:19,200 Speaker 1: the shower floor. It's carpet. It crunches. You stand there 464 00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:21,880 Speaker 1: for just a second and then you sink down about 465 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,960 Speaker 1: two feet or about two inches. So I'm like, okay, 466 00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:26,840 Speaker 1: enough of this. I'm just gonna take a shower and go. 467 00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:29,680 Speaker 1: So I take the shower, come out. In the meantime, 468 00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:32,640 Speaker 1: my wife, she's a bedbug fanatic, so I don't even 469 00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:34,679 Speaker 1: know how I even got her to stay in this hotel. 470 00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:38,199 Speaker 1: She's pulled the bed down and she's like, you're not 471 00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:40,600 Speaker 1: gonna want to see this, but I have to show you. 472 00:27:41,680 --> 00:27:43,680 Speaker 1: There was a spot in the bed that was ten 473 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:45,600 Speaker 1: times worse than the spot in the floor. It looked 474 00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:49,520 Speaker 1: like somebody had defecated in the bed and they'd slaughtered 475 00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:54,320 Speaker 1: an animal on this mattress. And I was like, okay, 476 00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:57,080 Speaker 1: let's go. So we go out. I'm thinking I'm gonna 477 00:27:57,080 --> 00:27:59,399 Speaker 1: get me breakfast. So I get out and there and 478 00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:03,879 Speaker 1: the lady points over to the bar and it's black bananas, 479 00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:10,480 Speaker 1: rotten apples that have them. So we go ahead, we 480 00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:13,280 Speaker 1: go ahead. We're leaving I get in the parking lot, 481 00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:16,240 Speaker 1: the pool has been filled in with concrete, and it's 482 00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:23,199 Speaker 1: got left of the concretes there, and there's hypodermic needles 483 00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:25,760 Speaker 1: laying in the parking lot. And then I actually see 484 00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:28,960 Speaker 1: what's left of like a one pot meth lab a 485 00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:32,080 Speaker 1: gatorade bottle laying over the side of the parking lot. So, 486 00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:36,800 Speaker 1: my gosh, I'm cringing on his behalf. All right, we're 487 00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:39,600 Speaker 1: gonna turn through as many these as we can as 488 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,080 Speaker 1: soon as I get back. In the meantime, I want 489 00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:44,120 Speaker 1: you to do something for me. I want you to prepare, 490 00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 1: make a little preparation for a bump a year. I 491 00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:50,920 Speaker 1: want you to go to my Patriot Supply dot com 492 00:28:50,960 --> 00:28:54,040 Speaker 1: and get yourself an emergency food kit. I want you 493 00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:56,320 Speaker 1: to get it. I don't want you to do what 494 00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:58,800 Speaker 1: I've been tempted to do, which is dip into it. 495 00:28:59,440 --> 00:29:01,280 Speaker 1: I want you to get it. I want you to 496 00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:04,720 Speaker 1: stash it at it garage. I don't care. Stash it 497 00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:07,040 Speaker 1: so you don't see it and think about it, and 498 00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:10,360 Speaker 1: just keep it there. All right, every single person should 499 00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:13,760 Speaker 1: have an emergency three month food kit, especially in these times. 500 00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:19,000 Speaker 1: Go to my Patriots Supply dot com and get yours today. 501 00:29:19,200 --> 00:29:23,000 Speaker 1: Everyone in your home needs this two thousand calories a 502 00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:28,440 Speaker 1: day of real energy food. Keep you alive, my patriots, 503 00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:33,800 Speaker 1: supply dot com go. We'll be back. You're listening to 504 00:29:33,840 --> 00:29:47,120 Speaker 1: The Oracle One screen Baby, The Jesse Kelly Show, The 505 00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:51,240 Speaker 1: Jesse Kelly Show. Final segment of The Jesse Kelly Show. 506 00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:53,360 Speaker 1: We'll be right back tomorrow and then the next day, 507 00:29:53,360 --> 00:29:55,160 Speaker 1: and then I'm not coming in because it's Saturday. But 508 00:29:55,240 --> 00:29:57,920 Speaker 1: you get the idea. Remember you can email me Jesse 509 00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:03,040 Speaker 1: at Jesse Kelly Show dot Jesse at Jesse Kelly Show 510 00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:06,000 Speaker 1: dot com. Don't forget if you miss it. Every minute 511 00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:10,040 Speaker 1: of the show's podcasted on iHeart, Google, Spotify, and iTunes. 512 00:30:10,480 --> 00:30:12,160 Speaker 1: Michael and I are still trying to figure out if 513 00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:14,960 Speaker 1: that last guy cussed. Michael beeped it out, but we 514 00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:16,680 Speaker 1: have to check and make sure it doesn't get onto 515 00:30:16,680 --> 00:30:19,680 Speaker 1: the podcast cuts. Kids listen to the show. Just a reminder. 516 00:30:19,880 --> 00:30:22,000 Speaker 1: I know this is normal because I never take calls. 517 00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:25,280 Speaker 1: Once every couple of weeks I'll take calls for you 518 00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:28,280 Speaker 1: people who call in. I know I'm a little rough 519 00:30:28,280 --> 00:30:31,440 Speaker 1: around the edges and certainly a terrible person, but kids 520 00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:35,280 Speaker 1: do listen to the show. You can't cuss. No cussing, 521 00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:37,680 Speaker 1: all right, nothing that would be inappropriate forgetting my own 522 00:30:37,760 --> 00:30:40,920 Speaker 1: kids listen to the show. Kids are listening, all right, 523 00:30:40,960 --> 00:30:43,920 Speaker 1: so just try to keep it PG. I'm gonna care 524 00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:45,640 Speaker 1: if you're a little roof around thee. I just keep 525 00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:49,000 Speaker 1: it PG. For the kiddos out there. People listen as 526 00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:51,600 Speaker 1: a family, parents listen on the way taking their kid 527 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:53,760 Speaker 1: to school, taking their kid home from school. And I 528 00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:56,320 Speaker 1: have promised, and I will always keep this promise to you. 529 00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:58,440 Speaker 1: I don't make many of them. This will always be 530 00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:00,760 Speaker 1: a show you can listen to with your children. It 531 00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:03,080 Speaker 1: will always be you never have to turn this show 532 00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:05,280 Speaker 1: off when you're going inside, because you don't know if 533 00:31:05,280 --> 00:31:07,840 Speaker 1: I'm going to take it other than PG, it's just 534 00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:12,560 Speaker 1: not going to happen. That's one. Two. Your dog deserves 535 00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:15,240 Speaker 1: better than you. I'm just kidding. No, he doesn't deserve 536 00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:17,880 Speaker 1: better than you. He deserves better than that crappy dog food. Though. 537 00:31:19,520 --> 00:31:21,360 Speaker 1: All I can do is tell you this, you know what, 538 00:31:21,960 --> 00:31:24,320 Speaker 1: forget about me. I want to read this for you. Okay. 539 00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:27,800 Speaker 1: I've heard you talk multiple times about adding this is 540 00:31:27,800 --> 00:31:30,800 Speaker 1: an email designer dog Jesse. That's not nice. I've heard 541 00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:33,960 Speaker 1: you talk multiple times speaking about rough greens to Fred's 542 00:31:33,960 --> 00:31:36,760 Speaker 1: food at breakfast. I've been a dog trainer for about 543 00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:39,760 Speaker 1: fifteen years now. If you're only feeding him once a day, 544 00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:42,120 Speaker 1: he's going to hurl up his food because it's too much. 545 00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:44,480 Speaker 1: By the way, we feed Fred twice a day, morning 546 00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:46,600 Speaker 1: and night. We only put rough greens in in the morning. 547 00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:48,800 Speaker 1: I need to clarify anyway. He goes on to say, 548 00:31:48,840 --> 00:31:50,840 Speaker 1: break it his feedings, so on and so forth. He says, 549 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:54,160 Speaker 1: I'm a huge believer in rough greens. As my at 550 00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:56,560 Speaker 1: the time thirteen year old was on the verge of 551 00:31:56,600 --> 00:31:59,800 Speaker 1: being put down because her back end was starting to fail. 552 00:32:00,320 --> 00:32:03,200 Speaker 1: I tried it with her and within two weeks she 553 00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:07,240 Speaker 1: was actually playing again, granted for fifteen second verse, but 554 00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:10,280 Speaker 1: she was acting much happier and healthier. Here it is 555 00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:13,440 Speaker 1: over a year later, and she's doing well. Still. It 556 00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:15,959 Speaker 1: has added at least a year to her life, and 557 00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:18,960 Speaker 1: now all five of my dogs eat rough greens. His 558 00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:22,680 Speaker 1: name is Scott. How about that for a testimonial. You 559 00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:25,360 Speaker 1: want a free trial bag for your puppy, go get 560 00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:28,960 Speaker 1: a free trialbag. Go to rough Greens. Are you ff? 561 00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:33,720 Speaker 1: By the way roughgreens dot com slash Jesse Roughgreens dot 562 00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:36,960 Speaker 1: com slash Jesse gets you your free trial bag. Now 563 00:32:36,960 --> 00:32:39,400 Speaker 1: we got one segment left. I need you to turn 564 00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:41,600 Speaker 1: him in. Burn him all right, turn him in, Burnham 565 00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:48,400 Speaker 1: Mike Pennsylvania Go flew the first time in my life 566 00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:51,160 Speaker 1: nineteen sixty nine to go down to basic in Texas. 567 00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:55,280 Speaker 1: The damn replace fell three seconds and scared the poop 568 00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:58,280 Speaker 1: out of me. I'm taking it clean. In Texas, I 569 00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:01,360 Speaker 1: took off for Vietnam. Airplane did good until we got 570 00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:04,560 Speaker 1: to Manila. Breaks didn't work, and Manila has a runway 571 00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:06,960 Speaker 1: that goes up and off the end of the cliff. 572 00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:10,640 Speaker 1: We went lying down into that valley for about ten 573 00:33:10,840 --> 00:33:14,440 Speaker 1: seconds of free fall. Finally that stretchade started up got 574 00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:17,680 Speaker 1: me to Vietnam. I stayed four tours in Vietnam because 575 00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:24,320 Speaker 1: I refused to fly back home Supper five man. Oh 576 00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:33,080 Speaker 1: that's four tours. Cindy Denver go once in a lifetime 577 00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:38,920 Speaker 1: family vacation to London Edinburgh over Christmas. There was a 578 00:33:38,920 --> 00:33:42,440 Speaker 1: half inch of snow in London and Edinburgh. Everything came 579 00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:45,080 Speaker 1: to a dead stop. So we got on the last 580 00:33:45,160 --> 00:33:49,680 Speaker 1: flight to Edinburgh. Only our baggage didn't make it, and 581 00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:52,440 Speaker 1: so then we get to the hotel and for the 582 00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:55,080 Speaker 1: next four mornings, every morning I'm getting up an hour 583 00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:57,280 Speaker 1: before my family and spending an hour to an hour 584 00:33:57,280 --> 00:33:59,800 Speaker 1: and a half on the phone with British Airways trying 585 00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:04,080 Speaker 1: to figure out where the heck are luggages. They can't 586 00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:06,560 Speaker 1: find it, can't find it, can't find it. Finally, on 587 00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:09,720 Speaker 1: Christmas Eve we rushed to it. We're wearing the same 588 00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:12,920 Speaker 1: clothes every day for the first four days of our 589 00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:17,120 Speaker 1: first bait of our life, once on lifetime vacations. Finally, 590 00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:19,759 Speaker 1: on Christmas Eve, we walk into the stores half an 591 00:34:19,760 --> 00:34:22,840 Speaker 1: hour before they close because they close early there to 592 00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:25,840 Speaker 1: buy some clothes so that we could wear decent clothes 593 00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:29,560 Speaker 1: to church the next day. And we're so we finally 594 00:34:29,560 --> 00:34:31,960 Speaker 1: settle down. We've got clothes, and we go looking for 595 00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:34,480 Speaker 1: a place to eat Christmas Eve dinner as a family 596 00:34:35,000 --> 00:34:37,319 Speaker 1: while all of the restaurants in the area where we 597 00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:39,720 Speaker 1: were staying turned into bars, and we had a fifteen 598 00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:41,920 Speaker 1: year old son and we would walk in can't serve you. 599 00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:44,279 Speaker 1: We're like, it doesn't We're just want food. We don't 600 00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:48,360 Speaker 1: doesn't matter they can't service. After six places, we finally 601 00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:56,800 Speaker 1: find a Mexican restaurant in Scotland run by Chinese people 602 00:34:57,360 --> 00:35:02,560 Speaker 1: can't speak English, and I ordered today so with eggs, 603 00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:11,359 Speaker 1: and it was haggis for you Yankees. Terzo is a 604 00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:15,520 Speaker 1: Mexican sausage. It's also glorious. It's got all these Mexican 605 00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:19,520 Speaker 1: spices in it. It's most definitely not haggis. Willie, Idaho, 606 00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:25,960 Speaker 1: Go Hi. Recently, my wife and I moved up to 607 00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:29,320 Speaker 1: the Canadian border in Idaho and they finally dropped the 608 00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:32,000 Speaker 1: COVID restriction. So last of all, we thought, well, let's 609 00:35:32,040 --> 00:35:34,759 Speaker 1: do a road drip into Canada for our anniversary. So 610 00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:37,840 Speaker 1: when we get to the border crossing, they say to 611 00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:40,880 Speaker 1: my wife, you've been randomly selected to take a COVID 612 00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:43,719 Speaker 1: nineteen test, and they give us a kit with very 613 00:35:43,719 --> 00:35:46,520 Speaker 1: little instructions. Well, we kind of figure it out. We 614 00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:49,000 Speaker 1: call the eight hundred number on the kit and they 615 00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,239 Speaker 1: say we'll call you back for a virtual test. So 616 00:35:51,360 --> 00:35:53,319 Speaker 1: we're driving down the road, we have to pull over. 617 00:35:53,960 --> 00:35:56,880 Speaker 1: Finally they call us back and she swabs and everything, 618 00:35:56,920 --> 00:35:59,840 Speaker 1: puts the kid into a package which is FedEx and 619 00:35:59,840 --> 00:36:05,320 Speaker 1: they it must be mailed by five o'clock today. So okay, 620 00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:07,239 Speaker 1: we go into the next town. Where's the FedEx. There's 621 00:36:07,239 --> 00:36:10,200 Speaker 1: no FedEx, just little towns, little towns, no FedEx. And 622 00:36:10,280 --> 00:36:12,200 Speaker 1: I'm like, I think we can make it to Calgary 623 00:36:12,280 --> 00:36:14,759 Speaker 1: by five, so we go. It puts us on this 624 00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:19,000 Speaker 1: highway that is rolling hills. It's either farm trucks or 625 00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:22,320 Speaker 1: sports cars. And we're in our little uh gap zipper 626 00:36:22,760 --> 00:36:25,759 Speaker 1: and these people are just white knuckle passing, so I'm 627 00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:30,719 Speaker 1: stressing out on the drive. Finally we get in. We're 628 00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:33,440 Speaker 1: getting into Calgary, and my wife had the GPS set 629 00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:35,759 Speaker 1: for our hotel, but then she put it in for 630 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:39,040 Speaker 1: this FedEx location and we didn't know it, but they 631 00:36:39,040 --> 00:36:41,239 Speaker 1: were both running at the same time. So it'd say 632 00:36:41,280 --> 00:36:43,400 Speaker 1: get into right two lanes and then get into the 633 00:36:43,440 --> 00:36:46,000 Speaker 1: right two lanes and say go straight. And I'm just 634 00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:48,839 Speaker 1: pulling my hair out by this point. If I was young, 635 00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:51,160 Speaker 1: I would have got mad, but my wife is beautiful 636 00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:53,239 Speaker 1: and sweet, so I just kept trying to do what 637 00:36:54,480 --> 00:36:56,960 Speaker 1: Finally we get to the FedEx at five minutes to 638 00:36:57,120 --> 00:37:00,200 Speaker 1: five and drop it off because of course, if we 639 00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:02,359 Speaker 1: don't want to go to Canadian jail or something, if 640 00:37:02,360 --> 00:37:07,120 Speaker 1: we haven't followed Trudeau's instructions or whatever, we get it there, 641 00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:09,399 Speaker 1: and then the whole weekend we're in Canada, we don't 642 00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:11,640 Speaker 1: hear anything. We're coming back going man, or were they 643 00:37:11,640 --> 00:37:14,040 Speaker 1: going to stop us and not let us back into 644 00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:17,040 Speaker 1: the US or whatever? And then like five days later, 645 00:37:17,120 --> 00:37:19,120 Speaker 1: when we get back into the US, we get a 646 00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:24,359 Speaker 1: phone call we haven't received your teest yet. Yeah, the 647 00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:27,200 Speaker 1: funniest part of the story was the double GPS and 648 00:37:27,360 --> 00:37:33,000 Speaker 1: trying to deal with that. Oh, this has been fantastic. 649 00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:36,120 Speaker 1: What is it about other people's misery that we all 650 00:37:36,239 --> 00:37:38,560 Speaker 1: enjoy so much? And there are tons I'm not going 651 00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:41,480 Speaker 1: to get to. We just ran out of time. Look, okay, 652 00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:43,600 Speaker 1: you know what this is for me? This is a 653 00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:47,600 Speaker 1: lesson Next time I take calls. It won't be tomorrow 654 00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:49,160 Speaker 1: or anything like that, but next time I take a 655 00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:50,920 Speaker 1: call it's probably a couple of weeks or something like that. 656 00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:54,600 Speaker 1: I'm probably going to do the same theme, because there 657 00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:57,600 Speaker 1: are clearly a ton of these that are hilarious and 658 00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:00,359 Speaker 1: it's a nice break from everything, is it not. We're 659 00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:02,600 Speaker 1: gonna be back here tomorrow and I'm gonna get into 660 00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:05,000 Speaker 1: all the other news, but dang, we gotta take a 661 00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:08,400 Speaker 1: minute and smile. Take a minute and smile. Life is short, 662 00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:17,520 Speaker 1: life is good, all right, that's all so