WEBVTT - Best Of: A Blind Cook Becomes a Master Chef 0:00:14.956 --> 0:00:25.916 Pushkin Hey, Slight Changed listeners, It's maya. New episodes of 0:00:25.956 --> 0:00:28.916 A Slight Change of Plans are coming your way this October. 0:00:29.516 --> 0:00:32.036 In the meantime, I wanted to share an episode that 0:00:32.076 --> 0:00:35.596 I returned to again and again. It's a conversation I 0:00:35.676 --> 0:00:38.836 had with the world renowned chef Christine Haw and I 0:00:38.876 --> 0:00:41.556 featured her story in my ted talk earlier this summer. 0:00:42.156 --> 0:00:45.676 When Christine was twenty four, a rare neurological condition left 0:00:45.676 --> 0:00:48.756 her legally blind, and she was concerned she might never 0:00:48.836 --> 0:00:52.276 be able to cook again. Her story shows the power 0:00:52.356 --> 0:00:55.476 of imaginative courage in the face of change. I hope 0:00:55.516 --> 0:00:56.156 you enjoy it. 0:01:07.156 --> 0:01:10.396 I remember noticing that the vision in one of my 0:01:10.476 --> 0:01:13.956 eyes was blurry, and I assumed it was my contact lens. 0:01:14.236 --> 0:01:16.876 I took it out and I cleaned it, popped it 0:01:16.916 --> 0:01:20.516 back in. I still realized that my eyesight was blurry, 0:01:20.596 --> 0:01:24.756 so I ended up going to an optometrist and he 0:01:24.876 --> 0:01:28.036 checked out my eye, did all the usual eye exams, 0:01:28.556 --> 0:01:32.556 concluded that it was actually something neurological. My brain was fine, 0:01:32.596 --> 0:01:34.356 but the nerve tissue that connects the eye to the 0:01:34.356 --> 0:01:36.956 brain transmitting the image that my eye was taking in 0:01:37.116 --> 0:01:38.516 was on the Fritz. 0:01:39.596 --> 0:01:43.676 That's Christine Hat describing a rare neurological condition that caused 0:01:43.676 --> 0:01:47.556 her vision to rapidly deteriorate and left her legally blind 0:01:47.636 --> 0:01:50.916 by age twenty four. Christine had to relearn how to 0:01:50.996 --> 0:01:53.636 navigate so much in her life, the ins and outs 0:01:53.676 --> 0:01:56.916 of her home, opening mail, and cooking food for herself. 0:01:57.596 --> 0:02:00.156 Making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, which had once 0:02:00.196 --> 0:02:03.636 been so straightforward for her, now felt like a daunting task. 0:02:04.276 --> 0:02:06.556 I noticed that when I put the jelly on the 0:02:06.596 --> 0:02:09.276 slice of bread, and all of the jelly got all 0:02:09.316 --> 0:02:12.396 over the counter. It dripped down my arm. When I 0:02:12.476 --> 0:02:15.356 tried to line the two slices of bread together like 0:02:15.396 --> 0:02:19.156 the sandwich seemed not perfect. And I remember being very 0:02:19.156 --> 0:02:23.596 frustrated with myself, throwing that sandwich away and just telling myself, 0:02:23.676 --> 0:02:25.676 I don't know how I'll be independent again. I don't 0:02:25.676 --> 0:02:27.396 think I'll be able to ever cook again. 0:02:28.316 --> 0:02:32.116 Spoiler alert, Christine did cook again, and she's found her 0:02:32.156 --> 0:02:36.276 independence again. Today. Christine's a world renowned chef who goes 0:02:36.316 --> 0:02:39.596 by the nickname the Blind Cook. She won season three 0:02:39.676 --> 0:02:43.116 of the hit reality TV show Master Chef in twenty twelve, 0:02:43.636 --> 0:02:46.196 and she's written a New York Times best selling cookbook 0:02:46.276 --> 0:02:52.916 and owns two restaurants in Houston, Texas. On today's episode, 0:02:53.076 --> 0:02:56.796 a blind woman becomes a master chef and redefines what 0:02:56.836 --> 0:03:02.996 independence means to her. Along the way, I'm Maya Shunker 0:03:03.116 --> 0:03:05.556 and this is a slight change of plans, A show 0:03:05.596 --> 0:03:07.916 about who we are and who we become in the 0:03:07.956 --> 0:03:22.756 face of a big chain. Christine Ha grew up in 0:03:22.796 --> 0:03:26.396 a Vietnamese American family, and she loved the traditional dishes 0:03:26.436 --> 0:03:29.676 her mom would cook for her. When Christine got to college, 0:03:29.716 --> 0:03:32.396 she was eager to recreate some of her mom's recipes 0:03:32.836 --> 0:03:35.716 to reconnect with her Vietnamese heritage and also to feel 0:03:35.756 --> 0:03:38.196 close to her mom, who had died of cancer when 0:03:38.276 --> 0:03:41.836 Christine was thirteen. The more Christine cooked, the more she 0:03:41.916 --> 0:03:45.156 realized just how much she loved it, the recipes and 0:03:45.236 --> 0:03:47.956 the experience of sharing food with her friends and family, 0:03:48.436 --> 0:03:51.396 so she turned it into a full on hobby. But 0:03:51.476 --> 0:03:54.036 that all changed for Christine when she was diagnosed with 0:03:54.116 --> 0:03:58.636 neuromielitis optica in her early twenties. She experienced blurry vision, 0:03:59.076 --> 0:04:02.676 numbness in her arms and legs, partial paralysis, and seizures. 0:04:03.356 --> 0:04:06.436 While medication would help with many of these symptoms, doctors 0:04:06.476 --> 0:04:09.436 told her to expect severe and permanent vision lie loss. 0:04:10.556 --> 0:04:12.556 I asked Christine to share what it was like to 0:04:12.556 --> 0:04:14.076 receive this news. 0:04:14.276 --> 0:04:19.916 I was very fearful. I felt very alone because at 0:04:19.916 --> 0:04:24.276 the time, I was in my early twenties, and of 0:04:24.276 --> 0:04:27.716 course most of my friends were not experiencing that. None 0:04:27.796 --> 0:04:31.636 of them I really knew how to deal with chronic illness, 0:04:31.836 --> 0:04:35.516 vision loss, those types of things. I think when you're 0:04:35.516 --> 0:04:37.596 in your twenties, you assume you're invincible and you don't 0:04:37.596 --> 0:04:39.156 think you're going to be dealing with stuff like that 0:04:39.276 --> 0:04:42.556 until you're much much older. So I felt very alone 0:04:42.596 --> 0:04:45.356 in what I was experiencing, and no one could really relate, 0:04:45.916 --> 0:04:48.596 And so in my head, I was thinking, why are 0:04:48.676 --> 0:04:51.556 my friends not caring as much as I do about 0:04:51.556 --> 0:04:55.116 what I'm going through? Or why are they still able 0:04:55.196 --> 0:05:00.956 to laugh and do normal everyday things and feel like 0:05:01.036 --> 0:05:02.716 that's okay when I can't. 0:05:02.996 --> 0:05:06.796 Can you say more? You mentioned that you felt socially isolated, 0:05:06.876 --> 0:05:08.556 and I'm wondering if you can. I think this is 0:05:08.556 --> 0:05:11.356 so relateable. Well, for so many people who go through 0:05:12.196 --> 0:05:16.436 unexpected and rare challenges right that they don't feel that 0:05:16.556 --> 0:05:18.196 other people can relate to them. 0:05:18.796 --> 0:05:23.556 So it's definitely a grief experience. So earlier in life, 0:05:23.596 --> 0:05:25.076 I had to agree the loss of my mom when 0:05:25.116 --> 0:05:28.156 she passed away when I was young, but it's similar 0:05:28.236 --> 0:05:30.036 in that you go through the same motions. I was 0:05:30.076 --> 0:05:35.276 in denial and then I felt upset that I was 0:05:35.316 --> 0:05:38.316 going through this and other people didn't understand. I felt alone. 0:05:38.756 --> 0:05:43.676 Then I felt sad. I felt at times, not often, 0:05:43.676 --> 0:05:45.996 but at times I felt sorry for myself, like wondering 0:05:46.076 --> 0:05:48.196 why this was happening to me and not somebody else. 0:05:48.796 --> 0:05:53.476 And then I think I had to allow myself to 0:05:53.476 --> 0:05:55.876 sit in that space and feel that sadness and feel 0:05:55.876 --> 0:06:01.636 that loss. I basically allowed myself to pity myself and 0:06:02.116 --> 0:06:05.556 allowed myself to cry about it and ask why is 0:06:05.596 --> 0:06:08.996 this happening to me and tell myself this really sucks. 0:06:09.636 --> 0:06:13.476 And it took some time a lot of thinking and 0:06:13.596 --> 0:06:16.476 just kind of ruminating with my own thoughts in my head. 0:06:17.356 --> 0:06:20.236 It helped me come to the realization that no matter 0:06:20.276 --> 0:06:24.876 what happens, the world is going to keep on moving on, 0:06:24.996 --> 0:06:27.996 so the sun will continue to rise, continue to set 0:06:28.196 --> 0:06:30.916 regardless of what happens. And it is a weird feeling 0:06:30.916 --> 0:06:32.996 and I feel like I've gone through this before. With 0:06:33.036 --> 0:06:34.756 the loss of my mom. Is like you wake up 0:06:34.756 --> 0:06:37.116 the next day and you're like, there are still people 0:06:37.196 --> 0:06:40.476 driving to work, there's still people going to school, there's 0:06:40.516 --> 0:06:43.556 still you know, people are still living their lives, even 0:06:43.596 --> 0:06:46.276 though my life feels like it just got turned upside down. 0:06:47.316 --> 0:06:49.796 You know, you mentioned that you had lost your mother 0:06:49.956 --> 0:06:53.956 at a young age. I imagine that this forced a 0:06:54.076 --> 0:06:57.636 kind of independence on you, and I'm wondering whether that 0:06:57.716 --> 0:07:01.836 independent mindset in some ways prepared you for this moment 0:07:02.076 --> 0:07:03.636 of deteriorating vision. 0:07:04.676 --> 0:07:06.756 It's interesting you say that, because I almost thought it 0:07:06.796 --> 0:07:08.956 was the opposite. So, because I lost my mom when 0:07:08.956 --> 0:07:11.196 I was young, I did feel like I had to 0:07:11.236 --> 0:07:14.516 grow up fairly quickly and become very independent and rely 0:07:14.796 --> 0:07:18.476 mostly on myself. And when I lost my mom, I 0:07:18.556 --> 0:07:22.756 realized that you cannot depend on any person in your 0:07:22.796 --> 0:07:25.796 life because in a second that person could be gone 0:07:25.836 --> 0:07:28.476 and then your whole world gets turned upside down. So 0:07:29.116 --> 0:07:33.276 I think for me, losing my mom forced me to 0:07:33.316 --> 0:07:35.676 be independent and not dependent on other people. But actually, 0:07:35.756 --> 0:07:39.596 when I started losing my vision, I had to give 0:07:39.676 --> 0:07:42.396 up independence and I had to depend on people more 0:07:42.436 --> 0:07:45.716 and ask for help for even the most mundane of 0:07:45.876 --> 0:07:52.636 tasks like reading my mail or trying to identify things 0:07:52.676 --> 0:07:57.196 in the refrigerator, or pouring myself a glass of water 0:07:57.276 --> 0:08:01.116 to drink. And so it stripped me of my independence. 0:08:01.156 --> 0:08:05.196 So in a way, I really wasn't prepared for that, 0:08:05.276 --> 0:08:07.716 because losing my mom did make me independent, and then 0:08:07.796 --> 0:08:10.956 losing my vision made made me learn to be dependent again. 0:08:11.356 --> 0:08:13.756 Yeah, and it sounds like from what you're describing that 0:08:14.596 --> 0:08:17.636 being independent had become a large part of your identity. 0:08:17.756 --> 0:08:21.036 So maybe you were in part grieving a loss of 0:08:21.036 --> 0:08:22.876 independence since you were now going to have to rely 0:08:22.956 --> 0:08:24.636 on people in a way that you hadn't before. 0:08:24.676 --> 0:08:28.636 Oh, definitely. I always say the hardest thing about the 0:08:28.756 --> 0:08:32.476 vision loss was the loss of some of the independence 0:08:32.516 --> 0:08:33.436 that I was used to. 0:08:37.036 --> 0:08:40.436 So your vision is slowly deteriorating. Is there a moment 0:08:40.636 --> 0:08:44.476 where maybe it hits you for the first time, this 0:08:44.516 --> 0:08:46.876 is not getting better? You know? In the past, maybe 0:08:46.916 --> 0:08:49.316 I've been able to fight my way through problems that 0:08:49.436 --> 0:08:52.076 this is one I just don't have any chance against it. 0:08:53.036 --> 0:08:55.516 I think I had several moments like that, one of 0:08:56.036 --> 0:08:58.636 which I that really stands out of my head was 0:08:58.676 --> 0:09:02.556 a moment when I had lost some more vision. And 0:09:02.636 --> 0:09:05.156 like I'd mentioned, it was gradual over the years, so 0:09:05.276 --> 0:09:08.396 anytime it would decrease a little bit to a new baseline, 0:09:08.396 --> 0:09:10.716 I would start getting used to that base one be like, Okay, 0:09:10.716 --> 0:09:12.916 well this is I can live with this. I'm getting 0:09:12.996 --> 0:09:15.876 used to it. I can figure out how to still 0:09:15.916 --> 0:09:19.076 walk around without a white cane, or I can enlarge 0:09:19.116 --> 0:09:21.916 the font on my computer to thirty five point font 0:09:21.956 --> 0:09:24.476 and still read my screen or whatnot. And then I 0:09:24.516 --> 0:09:27.076 would as soon as I would get used to that 0:09:27.356 --> 0:09:30.756 new baseline of my vision, it would decrease more and 0:09:30.796 --> 0:09:32.596 I would lose more vision, and I have to feel 0:09:32.636 --> 0:09:35.876 like I would start over. So I remember there was 0:09:35.916 --> 0:09:39.876 one particular time when my vision pretty much decreased to 0:09:39.916 --> 0:09:42.676 the level that it is now, which I describe as 0:09:43.476 --> 0:09:46.836 very very blurry and very washed out colors, and I 0:09:46.956 --> 0:09:49.556 just see some foggy shapes, as though if you were 0:09:49.556 --> 0:09:51.716 to step out of a very very hot shower and 0:09:51.716 --> 0:09:55.556 your mirrors all fogged up and with the steam. That's 0:09:55.676 --> 0:09:59.356 kind of how I see. So it's very very very blurry, 0:09:59.476 --> 0:10:02.956 don't see much color, maybe some slight shapes, but everything's 0:10:02.996 --> 0:10:06.916 foggy and hazy. When it decreased to this level. I 0:10:06.956 --> 0:10:09.716 remember I was living alone at the time, trying to 0:10:10.076 --> 0:10:12.436 make a sandwich for myself, and I thought the easiest 0:10:12.436 --> 0:10:14.876 thing was going to be peanut butter jelly. So I 0:10:14.996 --> 0:10:16.956 was like, Okay, I could find the bread. It's already 0:10:16.996 --> 0:10:19.116 sliced up. I just pulled the slices out, and I 0:10:19.116 --> 0:10:21.756 would just find the peanut butter by smell, find the 0:10:21.836 --> 0:10:24.036 jelly by smell, and then use a butter knife to 0:10:24.076 --> 0:10:26.796 spread the peanut butter and jelly on the two slices 0:10:26.836 --> 0:10:30.196 of bread. But I think I was in a very 0:10:30.236 --> 0:10:34.836 precarious mental state at that time already. And it's not 0:10:34.916 --> 0:10:37.156 that the sandwich has to be perfect to be edible 0:10:37.156 --> 0:10:39.476 and good, but I noticed that when I put the 0:10:39.556 --> 0:10:41.556 jelly on the slice of bread and all of the 0:10:41.636 --> 0:10:44.996 jelly got all over the counter, it dripped down my 0:10:45.236 --> 0:10:47.836 arm when I tried to line the two slices of 0:10:47.836 --> 0:10:52.596 bread together, like, the sandwich seemed not perfect. And growing 0:10:52.676 --> 0:10:54.956 up too, I'm very much a perfectionist and I still 0:10:55.116 --> 0:10:58.156 sort of am, so I think just not being able 0:10:58.196 --> 0:11:03.356 to make a perfect PEBJ sandwich at that time was 0:11:03.436 --> 0:11:05.796 kind of like the straw that broke the Camel's back, 0:11:05.996 --> 0:11:09.276 and I remember being very frustrated with myself, throwing that 0:11:09.316 --> 0:11:12.956 sandwich away and just telling myself, I don't think I'll 0:11:12.956 --> 0:11:14.956 be able to ever cook again. I don't know how 0:11:14.956 --> 0:11:17.836 I'll be independent again. You know, that's a moment that 0:11:17.876 --> 0:11:21.476 stands out in my head, but I've had many of 0:11:21.796 --> 0:11:23.076 similar moments like that. 0:11:24.716 --> 0:11:29.076 Yeah, it strikes me that in the face of protracted 0:11:29.596 --> 0:11:33.036 vision deterioration. You know, the obvious upside is that it's 0:11:33.036 --> 0:11:36.476 giving you time to adapt to your new world and 0:11:37.316 --> 0:11:40.196 find new habits and restructure your life. But on the 0:11:40.196 --> 0:11:43.876 other hand, there is this tortuous aspect that you described, 0:11:43.916 --> 0:11:47.036 which is, you know, you're clearly a highly motivated and 0:11:47.036 --> 0:11:51.276 adaptive person, adaptable person, and at every step you're saying, Okay, 0:11:51.316 --> 0:11:53.236 I got this, I got this, folks, I can I 0:11:53.236 --> 0:11:56.076 can work at this level, and then you're taunted by 0:11:56.076 --> 0:11:58.836 the fact that it just keeps getting worse. And so I imagine, yeah, 0:11:58.876 --> 0:12:00.196 you just kind of want to rip off the band 0:12:00.236 --> 0:12:01.796 aid at a certain point and know what the end 0:12:01.836 --> 0:12:02.436 outcome is. 0:12:03.596 --> 0:12:06.676 Yeah. I'm always the kind of person too that would 0:12:06.756 --> 0:12:08.836 rather know the bad news than not know. So it's 0:12:08.876 --> 0:12:11.076 all so much more anxiety of not knowing, like, oh, 0:12:11.156 --> 0:12:14.076 will my vision get worse or will I be able 0:12:14.116 --> 0:12:16.116 to do this? You know exactly? 0:12:16.516 --> 0:12:19.316 So where do you go from the peanut butter and 0:12:19.396 --> 0:12:20.436 jelly sandwich moment? 0:12:21.836 --> 0:12:26.636 I allowed myself for however long I needed to feel 0:12:26.636 --> 0:12:28.756 bad about not being able to make a peanut butter 0:12:28.796 --> 0:12:32.676 jelly sandwich. And then slowly I think I just thought 0:12:32.716 --> 0:12:36.996 more about, Okay, well, I didn't get it right that time, 0:12:37.116 --> 0:12:39.716 but when I'm in a better headspace, so let me 0:12:39.756 --> 0:12:43.356 try again. And then I would notice I could incrementally 0:12:44.036 --> 0:12:47.356 improve at little things in the kitchen. I noticed that 0:12:47.796 --> 0:12:49.796 as days went by and weeks went by, and I 0:12:49.796 --> 0:12:52.356 would attempt a little bit more things in the kitchen 0:12:52.396 --> 0:12:55.356 to try to just feed myself. I would be like, oh, 0:12:55.716 --> 0:12:58.196 today I was able to cut an orange and eat 0:12:58.196 --> 0:12:59.996 an orange. And then maybe the next day I was 0:13:00.036 --> 0:13:03.596 able to scramble an egg. Maybe some of it was burnt, 0:13:03.636 --> 0:13:05.836 but I was still able to do an egg. And 0:13:05.836 --> 0:13:07.756 then then a week after that, I was able to 0:13:08.116 --> 0:13:10.996 scramble an egg that was burnt. And then looking back, 0:13:11.036 --> 0:13:14.396 I would notice my progress and the steps forward that 0:13:14.436 --> 0:13:17.756 I was taking. So I had to tell myself, like, Okay, well, 0:13:17.876 --> 0:13:20.276 I couldn't do this a week ago, or a month ago, 0:13:20.516 --> 0:13:22.956 or six months ago. And then when you realize that 0:13:22.996 --> 0:13:25.996 you're making progress, I think it helps build confidence, and 0:13:26.036 --> 0:13:28.556 then that confidence gives you the courage to keep trying 0:13:29.076 --> 0:13:32.196 bigger and better things and putting yourself to the challenge 0:13:32.196 --> 0:13:34.916 and realizing that even if you fail the first time 0:13:34.996 --> 0:13:37.116 or make a mistake, you learn from that and you 0:13:37.156 --> 0:13:39.076 reassess and you try again. 0:13:39.876 --> 0:13:43.596 Yeah, you know, you mentioned the victory you felt at 0:13:43.636 --> 0:13:45.876 being able to peel an orange, and I'm wondering if 0:13:45.916 --> 0:13:48.756 you can tell me more about how it is you 0:13:48.796 --> 0:13:51.396 had to change your relationship with cooking. You know, at 0:13:51.396 --> 0:13:53.636 the time it was simply a hobby of yours, but 0:13:54.276 --> 0:13:58.436 what was involved in relearning how to cook and navigate 0:13:58.476 --> 0:13:59.316 the kitchen safely. 0:14:00.796 --> 0:14:03.716 It remained a hobby of mine for quite a long time, 0:14:03.996 --> 0:14:06.476 and I was losing my vision in this at the 0:14:06.516 --> 0:14:11.196 same time when I was voraciously teaching myself how to 0:14:11.236 --> 0:14:14.196 cook and reading all sorts of cookbooks and experimenting in 0:14:14.236 --> 0:14:17.556 the kitchen. So each time I would lose a little 0:14:17.596 --> 0:14:21.036 bit more vision and it would decrease to some new level. 0:14:21.116 --> 0:14:24.396 I would have to teach myself again how to accomplish 0:14:24.476 --> 0:14:26.796 the same things in the kitchen, And like I said, 0:14:26.836 --> 0:14:29.276 it was kind of a matter of taking these small 0:14:29.316 --> 0:14:32.636 steps and celebrating these small victories. But eventually I would 0:14:32.676 --> 0:14:36.156 just focus on being able to do things with my 0:14:36.236 --> 0:14:40.276 remaining four senses, and that actually taught me that cooking 0:14:40.356 --> 0:14:45.476 is much more of a multisensory ordeal than we often expect. Like, 0:14:45.876 --> 0:14:48.476 you can definitely get by in the kitchen with your 0:14:48.516 --> 0:14:50.996 sense of touch and your sense of smell and your 0:14:51.036 --> 0:14:53.196 sense of taste. Those things I would say are the 0:14:53.236 --> 0:14:57.396 most important in the kitchen. And yes, it would help 0:14:57.596 --> 0:15:00.396 visually probably to tell if something is cooked in a pan, 0:15:00.556 --> 0:15:03.756 But over the years, with a lot of experience, I'm 0:15:03.796 --> 0:15:06.596 able to tell if something is cooked by the texture 0:15:06.636 --> 0:15:09.036 and how it feels at the end of my cooking utensil, 0:15:09.356 --> 0:15:12.116 or by the smell of garlic. You can tell if 0:15:12.156 --> 0:15:15.076 it's raw, or if it's fragrant, or if it's burnt. 0:15:15.596 --> 0:15:19.556 So just learning over time to rely on my remaining 0:15:19.556 --> 0:15:21.996 four senses much more so than my sense of vision, 0:15:22.556 --> 0:15:25.356 was really how I got back into the kitchen and 0:15:25.396 --> 0:15:27.116 taught myself how to cook a lot of the dishes 0:15:27.156 --> 0:15:30.676 that I'd cooked before. And I actually think with my 0:15:30.796 --> 0:15:35.596 sense of sight out of the picture, I became much 0:15:35.636 --> 0:15:38.836 more of a nuanced cook in the kitchen, and I 0:15:38.876 --> 0:15:42.356 would pay much more attention to the small changes that 0:15:42.436 --> 0:15:44.676 a seasoning would make in a dish, and I'd pay 0:15:44.756 --> 0:15:47.556 much more attention to how things taste in your mouth 0:15:47.596 --> 0:15:49.636 when it comes to temperature and texture. And so I 0:15:49.676 --> 0:15:53.316 think that allowed me to focus more on those aspects 0:15:53.356 --> 0:15:56.116 of food, which helped me in some way become a 0:15:56.116 --> 0:15:56.716 better cook. 0:15:57.596 --> 0:16:00.196 So you end up writing a blog about your experiences 0:16:00.196 --> 0:16:03.156 in the kitchen at a website you create, which is 0:16:03.196 --> 0:16:08.436 called the blindcook dot com, and somewhat unexpectedly, the casting 0:16:08.516 --> 0:16:12.676 crew reality TV show Master Chef catches wind of your 0:16:12.716 --> 0:16:16.076 blog and ends up reaching out to you. Yeah. 0:16:16.116 --> 0:16:18.116 It was a strange one at first because I didn't 0:16:18.156 --> 0:16:23.876 believe it. And I remember I received an email through 0:16:23.956 --> 0:16:27.556 the contact form and they said, Hi, I'm the casting 0:16:27.596 --> 0:16:30.516 producer for a show called Master Chef. It's with Gordon Ramsey, 0:16:30.556 --> 0:16:34.156 it's on Fox. We wanted to see if you would 0:16:34.196 --> 0:16:38.156 like to audition. And I asked my husband and I 0:16:38.196 --> 0:16:40.756 was like, Hey, isn't this name familiar Gordon Ramsey, and 0:16:40.796 --> 0:16:43.476 John's like yeah, that's the chef that's from the UK 0:16:43.596 --> 0:16:45.516 that's on like Hell's Kitchen and all stuff, and he's 0:16:45.516 --> 0:16:48.436 always known for cursing at people blah blah blah. And 0:16:48.476 --> 0:16:50.796 then he was like, Oh, if that's legitimate, you should 0:16:50.836 --> 0:16:54.476 totally go an audition for the show. But we were like, 0:16:54.596 --> 0:16:57.596 is this for real? So at the time, too, I 0:16:58.036 --> 0:17:02.836 was very anonymous, like I'm naturally an introvert and a 0:17:03.236 --> 0:17:07.716 you know, pretty private person. So my blog had no 0:17:07.876 --> 0:17:10.556 pictures of me, didn't have my real name on there. 0:17:10.796 --> 0:17:13.316 I kept it very anonymous so that if you went 0:17:13.356 --> 0:17:15.036 to that blog, you would never know who it was. 0:17:15.796 --> 0:17:17.956 And they reach out just wondering if I was a 0:17:17.996 --> 0:17:20.196 real person, because you know, there were no photos of me. 0:17:20.276 --> 0:17:23.076 There was nothing about my bio really on there except 0:17:23.116 --> 0:17:25.476 I just wrote recipes and what it was like to 0:17:25.516 --> 0:17:30.596 be as someone who's visually impaired. And so I said, uh, okay, 0:17:30.796 --> 0:17:33.516 I will come audition, and you know, I went to 0:17:33.556 --> 0:17:37.356 the open casting call and auditions in Austin and when 0:17:37.436 --> 0:17:39.876 the producers were traveling around the country trying to look 0:17:39.916 --> 0:17:43.596 for of season three cast, and then the rest was 0:17:43.676 --> 0:17:44.356 kind of history. 0:17:44.756 --> 0:17:46.636 Well, it's not going to be history right now. I 0:17:46.676 --> 0:17:50.276 want to hear all. I want to hear all about 0:17:50.316 --> 0:17:54.636 your experience on Master Chef, So you know, I personally 0:17:54.636 --> 0:17:57.516 remember seeing you walking out on a set to make 0:17:57.636 --> 0:18:00.836 your first dish as a competitor in a kitchen that 0:18:00.996 --> 0:18:04.276 was largely unfamiliar to you and that you're not able 0:18:04.316 --> 0:18:07.516 to see. And on top of all that, there's the 0:18:07.596 --> 0:18:10.756 added pressure of making a dish that's going to be 0:18:10.836 --> 0:18:14.676 judged by three of the most famous chefs in the world. 0:18:15.476 --> 0:18:20.036 What was that like, Christine, Like, I can't imagine that 0:18:20.276 --> 0:18:21.156 mounting pressure. 0:18:22.116 --> 0:18:25.196 There's definitely a lot of pressure. It was nerve wracking. 0:18:25.356 --> 0:18:28.676 I mean I was in a space that, you know, 0:18:28.716 --> 0:18:30.716 in a big warehouse, with a lot of people I'd 0:18:30.716 --> 0:18:33.356 never met before, all of the other contestants. I've never 0:18:33.396 --> 0:18:37.916 been familiar with what the entertainment world or television world 0:18:38.116 --> 0:18:40.716 was like, so I had no idea what to expect 0:18:40.756 --> 0:18:44.156 with all these lights, these directors, all these like cameras 0:18:44.236 --> 0:18:46.396 rolling on Dolly's and of course a lot of it 0:18:46.436 --> 0:18:49.276 I couldn't even see, so all I could hear was 0:18:49.316 --> 0:18:51.236 just a lot of noise around me. So it was 0:18:51.316 --> 0:18:54.716 not only stressful knowing that I would have to cook 0:18:54.756 --> 0:18:58.276 a dish for these judges to taste, but stressful because 0:18:58.356 --> 0:19:01.596 I'm in a foreign environment as someone who's visual impaired 0:19:01.636 --> 0:19:04.836 and has no idea what's going on around me except 0:19:04.876 --> 0:19:07.716 with the context clues of what I hear, what I smell. 0:19:08.396 --> 0:19:11.716 Wow, well, I mean, things obviously went very well for 0:19:11.836 --> 0:19:16.116 you after that first dish. You kept advancing through the rounds, 0:19:16.676 --> 0:19:19.556 and such a poignant moment is when Gordon Ramsay said 0:19:19.596 --> 0:19:23.516 your apple pie looked stunning and of course tasted amazing 0:19:23.556 --> 0:19:24.156 and delicious. 0:19:24.756 --> 0:19:28.476 He was just really blown at the fact that I 0:19:28.596 --> 0:19:31.916 totally thought I fed him a pile of rubbish, which 0:19:31.956 --> 0:19:34.436 is now the running joke. So at my restaurants, my 0:19:34.556 --> 0:19:36.556 apple pie that served there as a dessert is called 0:19:36.596 --> 0:19:39.396 the rubbish apple pie because when he asked me, I'm like, 0:19:39.796 --> 0:19:41.516 I think it looks like a pile of rubbish. And 0:19:41.556 --> 0:19:43.356 I only use that word too, because in my head, 0:19:43.396 --> 0:19:45.476 I was like so nervous and I really wanted to 0:19:45.476 --> 0:19:47.276 say it looks like a pile of shit, but then 0:19:47.316 --> 0:19:49.076 I was like, oh, I'm on television. I can't use 0:19:49.116 --> 0:19:51.236 that word. So I'm like, naturally, I'm like, oh, he 0:19:51.316 --> 0:19:53.516 must use the word rubbish because he's from there. He's 0:19:53.516 --> 0:19:55.596 from the UK. He's pretty I was like, oh, it 0:19:55.676 --> 0:19:58.636 must look like a pile of rubbish, and you know 0:19:58.716 --> 0:20:02.236 he he told me. He was like, no, it definitely doesn't. 0:20:02.316 --> 0:20:05.236 It looks great. The crust is golden and flaky. And 0:20:05.876 --> 0:20:08.396 then he scraped a knife or a fork on top 0:20:08.396 --> 0:20:11.356 of it to let me here that it actually baked 0:20:11.356 --> 0:20:15.556 to the correct flakiness level. And then he cut out 0:20:15.556 --> 0:20:17.676 a slice of pie that I guess held together and 0:20:18.076 --> 0:20:19.556 then taste it and said it tasted good. 0:20:22.116 --> 0:20:23.996 We'll be back in a moment with a slight change 0:20:23.996 --> 0:20:26.556 of plans when we'll hear more from Christine about her 0:20:26.596 --> 0:20:35.636 experience on Master Chef. There was this one moment when 0:20:35.636 --> 0:20:38.796 you were on Master Chef that really affected me, where 0:20:39.516 --> 0:20:42.116 you said you felt your vision impairment was affecting people's 0:20:42.156 --> 0:20:46.156 ability to focus on what mattered most, which was your 0:20:46.156 --> 0:20:47.236 cooking skills. 0:20:48.036 --> 0:20:51.316 I didn't want people to think that what I was 0:20:51.396 --> 0:20:54.876 doing was so great or even better because it was 0:20:54.996 --> 0:20:57.436 someone that's visual impaired. I wanted to compete on the 0:20:57.476 --> 0:21:00.116 same level and be judged as the same level as 0:21:00.116 --> 0:21:04.316 everybody else. While yes, maybe it's going to be harder 0:21:04.356 --> 0:21:06.876 for me to do things because I'm visually impaired. But 0:21:06.916 --> 0:21:11.516 I didn't want that to be my quote unquote handicap. 0:21:11.876 --> 0:21:14.276 I wanted people to focus more and judge me and 0:21:14.356 --> 0:21:19.276 give me true constructive criticism based on my merits in 0:21:19.316 --> 0:21:21.276 the food I was putting up to be judged. 0:21:22.596 --> 0:21:25.836 Yeah, And did you feel that by the end of 0:21:25.876 --> 0:21:27.436 the process that was happening for you? 0:21:28.516 --> 0:21:33.076 I do. I mean it wasn't easy, so coming into it, 0:21:33.116 --> 0:21:36.716 they had to adapt my particular cooking stations so that 0:21:36.756 --> 0:21:39.076 I could use it as a cook who's visually impaired. 0:21:39.716 --> 0:21:43.956 So I needed some assistance in certain ways or adaptations 0:21:44.196 --> 0:21:47.676 that made sense. But it's not like I would ask 0:21:47.756 --> 0:21:51.476 for more time for my challenge or expect like a 0:21:51.476 --> 0:21:55.316 different ingredient, or expect special rules to be made for me. 0:21:55.556 --> 0:21:58.756 So at the beginning, yes, I did feel that insecurity 0:21:58.756 --> 0:22:02.356 that I wasn't sure how I would be treated because 0:22:02.396 --> 0:22:05.436 I'm sure a lot of people had never expected someone 0:22:05.476 --> 0:22:07.036 who is visually impaired to be able to cook. And 0:22:07.076 --> 0:22:10.396