WEBVTT - Finding the Groove 0:00:01.920 --> 0:00:07.640 Wine Down with Jane Kramer and I Heart Radio podcast. Okay, 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:11.880 welcome to this week's episode of Wine Down Friend. We've 0:00:11.920 --> 0:00:14.920 really been together a lot, we really have. I needed it. 0:00:15.200 --> 0:00:19.040 I did too. We went we had wine Down Podcast 0:00:19.079 --> 0:00:23.720 in Los Angeles, San Diego. We really were speed dating 0:00:24.320 --> 0:00:27.479 the West coast, or like, this is my favorite restaurant 0:00:27.480 --> 0:00:29.200 in l A. Let's go here. We can get to 0:00:29.200 --> 0:00:31.160 the beach in thirty minutes. In San Diego, let's go 0:00:31.200 --> 0:00:33.040 do it where the last in Michigan we could be 0:00:33.080 --> 0:00:35.680 in that moment. It was great. And then I loved 0:00:35.680 --> 0:00:39.120 our experience on the beach too, just like taking that 0:00:39.240 --> 0:00:44.800 minute to just really soak it in and everything. Um, 0:00:44.840 --> 0:00:50.200 but I have I have cheese grapes, and I wish 0:00:51.080 --> 0:00:53.880 can I describe what's in front of you? Okay, so 0:00:53.960 --> 0:00:57.319 on the sweetest little cocktail, big tea play. I need 0:00:57.360 --> 0:01:01.160 to really frame it. It is a big It isn't Dixie, 0:01:01.320 --> 0:01:04.399 there is I'll start with this, I think what I 0:01:04.480 --> 0:01:07.720 believe to be a wheat, then a few of those 0:01:08.040 --> 0:01:10.800 some red grapes, and my favorite part, it just really 0:01:10.840 --> 0:01:12.680 feels like you care about me. It is some sort 0:01:12.720 --> 0:01:17.840 of cheese cube. Several we're not going to get crazy. 0:01:18.040 --> 0:01:20.080 We each could have two and a half cheese cubes 0:01:21.000 --> 0:01:23.959 and they each have a toothpick. Is not to cross contaminate. 0:01:25.160 --> 0:01:26.880 And it all just matters a lot to me. I 0:01:26.880 --> 0:01:28.840 have no idea what this means. But I was like, well, 0:01:28.840 --> 0:01:30.600 what you doing up here? We're having a little Sam's 0:01:30.600 --> 0:01:33.520 Club sampler on a Saturday. What's going on trying my cheese? 0:01:33.560 --> 0:01:38.440 It's great? Uh No, I just got back from therapy 0:01:38.520 --> 0:01:42.520 and I walked into this platter of and let me 0:01:42.560 --> 0:01:44.640 just set the stage too. Is this gonna happen for 0:01:44.760 --> 0:01:47.039 me tomorrow? I don't know. If it does, I'm gonna 0:01:47.040 --> 0:01:53.600 be like that was for me. Um. But I it's 0:01:53.640 --> 0:01:58.000 been like a crazy you know, with Thanksgiving and the 0:01:58.160 --> 0:02:03.760 birthdays and um and filming the Chicago fire stuff. It's 0:02:03.800 --> 0:02:06.640 just been a lot of UM. I've just been like 0:02:06.720 --> 0:02:11.480 on the go so much. And I told Amy, you 0:02:11.520 --> 0:02:14.560 know a few things our therapist and just was like, oh, girl, 0:02:14.600 --> 0:02:17.560 like there's just so much going on. And and so 0:02:17.600 --> 0:02:19.440 I walk in and mind you, right before I go 0:02:19.480 --> 0:02:22.840 to therapy, I had I worked out, but I didn't 0:02:22.880 --> 0:02:26.760 have time to eat right, So I just through a 0:02:26.800 --> 0:02:29.120 prute protein shake in the car because I was just 0:02:29.200 --> 0:02:31.919 rushing from one thing to the next, right, and I'm 0:02:31.960 --> 0:02:34.400 just like, God, I'm starving, Like I should have grabbed 0:02:34.600 --> 0:02:37.200 a protein bar or something. I love that the other 0:02:37.240 --> 0:02:39.399 option is to chew the protein and so of drink 0:02:39.440 --> 0:02:42.920 the protein. If anyone's wondering what a Janet Cramer action 0:02:42.960 --> 0:02:46.520 figure looks like. The protein bar is not sold separate, Well, 0:02:46.560 --> 0:02:48.240 I'm getting off of those, not like I'm trying to eat, 0:02:48.320 --> 0:02:51.640 you know, just like the real foods, really cold cold drinking. 0:02:52.400 --> 0:02:55.320 And so I was just thinking, like I'm starving, and 0:02:55.360 --> 0:02:58.040 I walk in and Amy has this like beautiful plate 0:02:58.240 --> 0:02:59.880 of I ate all the strawberries, which is why this 0:03:00.040 --> 0:03:02.880 robberies aren't on there just like here it takes them 0:03:02.919 --> 0:03:05.160 to go. And I was like, what is this? And 0:03:05.240 --> 0:03:07.680 she goes, when you sent me that email that it's 0:03:07.680 --> 0:03:10.440 just it's been a really crazy season and some of 0:03:10.440 --> 0:03:13.520 the things that we discussed over the phone over Thanksgiving 0:03:13.520 --> 0:03:15.560 because I just had a few you know, when you 0:03:15.600 --> 0:03:16.919 just have those sessions like I need to talk to 0:03:17.000 --> 0:03:22.000 you like right now, ya um, like processing a few things. Yeah, 0:03:22.120 --> 0:03:25.120 And you know, She's like, I just think that you 0:03:25.240 --> 0:03:32.360 forget to sit and nourish and also celebrate you too. 0:03:32.600 --> 0:03:34.640 And she's like, so this we're having a little party 0:03:35.360 --> 0:03:38.680 and I want you to sit here and like eat, 0:03:39.480 --> 0:03:41.080 you know, share what we have to share and work there. 0:03:41.120 --> 0:03:42.920 But I was just like, I was like, you have 0:03:42.960 --> 0:03:44.600 no idea, Like I started crying. I was just like 0:03:44.640 --> 0:03:48.680 I'm so hungry and like, hey, I'm with this beautiful 0:03:48.720 --> 0:03:52.200 spread and she's so it was really sweet and then yeah, 0:03:52.240 --> 0:03:54.400 we threw a party because something that I had told 0:03:54.440 --> 0:04:00.880 her about, um you know, uh you know, my birthday 0:04:01.080 --> 0:04:07.080 and um the holidays, and she was just like you're who. 0:04:07.160 --> 0:04:09.600 She's like, We've had seventy sessions since I've known you, 0:04:10.320 --> 0:04:13.440 and she's like this is the this is the like 0:04:13.520 --> 0:04:16.320 the most proud I've ever been, Like, this is the 0:04:16.480 --> 0:04:19.160 you're like you've come to you know. And it was 0:04:19.200 --> 0:04:21.520 just like really, I was like, but I feel that, 0:04:21.560 --> 0:04:23.960 Like I even texted you something after wind down because 0:04:23.960 --> 0:04:28.800 I was like, I'm just really proud of you, I know, 0:04:28.920 --> 0:04:31.960 and we're not good at like accepting that it's like 0:04:32.000 --> 0:04:34.880 weird for our type or something. But I just thought back. 0:04:34.920 --> 0:04:36.320 I was like I sat back and I was like 0:04:36.360 --> 0:04:38.840 thinking about it. I'm like, not only did you well 0:04:38.839 --> 0:04:41.560 first of all, you flew home in a whirlwind, like 0:04:41.640 --> 0:04:44.120 after wind down. I think you had like literally sixty 0:04:44.160 --> 0:04:47.080 three minutes in your house to like king back, yeah, 0:04:47.480 --> 0:04:49.160 and get right back to the airport with the kids, 0:04:49.160 --> 0:04:50.560 to drop the kids off in Michigan so then you 0:04:50.600 --> 0:04:52.479 could fly to Chicago because you wanted them to be 0:04:52.560 --> 0:04:55.159 cozy and tucked in. I mean, that's just like it's 0:04:55.240 --> 0:04:57.679 so much and you're doing it alone. I think people 0:04:57.680 --> 0:05:01.040 assume sometimes you have like full time nanny or Katherine's 0:05:01.080 --> 0:05:02.839 with you all the time. But Catherine has three kids 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:05.440 and a husband, a husband she's choosing to keep, so 0:05:05.560 --> 0:05:08.480 like now she's busy having sex in her vest life. 0:05:09.040 --> 0:05:11.320 So anyways, I just had that moment when I was like, 0:05:11.400 --> 0:05:13.360 you know what, it was the night your movie came out. 0:05:14.200 --> 0:05:18.520 I was flying home with two kids, all right, RSB, 0:05:19.000 --> 0:05:22.880 who's living the best life? And I kept thinking, Um, 0:05:22.920 --> 0:05:24.520 I didn't spread it on the plane for those of 0:05:24.520 --> 0:05:26.680 you haters, um, but I just kept thinking, I was like, 0:05:26.839 --> 0:05:28.520 here you are, like you just don't want to get 0:05:28.520 --> 0:05:30.960 a breath, to chew anything more than a protein bar, 0:05:31.000 --> 0:05:34.640 but also to even celebrate the winds and the hard work. Thanks. 0:05:35.360 --> 0:05:38.359 I appreciate it. What it's crazy. I was talking to 0:05:38.360 --> 0:05:42.520 her too, and I said, um uh, I was saying, 0:05:44.640 --> 0:05:49.680 last year, I kept a toxic relationship around because I 0:05:49.720 --> 0:05:56.160 didn't want to be alone for the holidays. In this year, like, 0:05:56.320 --> 0:05:59.880 I'm so excited to be alone for the holidays and 0:06:00.200 --> 0:06:05.760 not have someone. So today my girlfriend was like, do 0:06:05.839 --> 0:06:08.040 you want to come to Jamaica and January? And I 0:06:08.080 --> 0:06:09.400 was like, no, I want to go to a beach 0:06:09.440 --> 0:06:12.919 by myself. Like not envious of the single part I have. 0:06:13.600 --> 0:06:15.800 I have a cute little family. I just I just 0:06:15.880 --> 0:06:19.400 missed the quiet. Yeah, and I think that's like what 0:06:19.400 --> 0:06:21.680 we were explaining. What I was kind of telling her today. 0:06:21.720 --> 0:06:24.279 I was like, I know, I'm I know one day 0:06:24.320 --> 0:06:27.159 I'm going to find my one and I'm going to 0:06:27.880 --> 0:06:30.440 host all the in laws. Yeah, and I can't wait 0:06:30.480 --> 0:06:33.119 for that day. But but I don't need to rush 0:06:33.160 --> 0:06:36.920 to get there. And like I'm actually like from kind 0:06:36.920 --> 0:06:40.120 of the nothing last year. Last year's served its purpose 0:06:40.160 --> 0:06:42.359 and and I needed that. Maybe you know, I didn't 0:06:42.360 --> 0:06:43.960 want to be alone, but like this year, it's like 0:06:44.040 --> 0:06:47.400 I I look forward to really getting to know myself 0:06:47.400 --> 0:06:51.279 in those moments and spending time alone and yeah, embracing 0:06:51.320 --> 0:06:53.240 it and just not being sad about the fact that 0:06:53.279 --> 0:06:55.320 I'm not like in love in the holidays or I 0:06:55.320 --> 0:06:59.240 have a boyfriend, like I'm enjoying just like really truly 0:06:59.279 --> 0:07:03.520 just being in love with yourself. Yeah. Yeah, speaking of 0:07:03.600 --> 0:07:05.800 being in love though, UM, we are going to take 0:07:05.800 --> 0:07:08.680 a break and we're going to get on these three 0:07:08.800 --> 0:07:13.520 beautiful women who are starring in a TV show. Um 0:07:13.560 --> 0:07:17.000 it is called, uh well, it's called Back in the 0:07:17.000 --> 0:07:19.040 Groove and it's kind of like a plan still out 0:07:19.040 --> 0:07:22.720 a groove back Um. It premiers um on Hulu. So 0:07:22.760 --> 0:07:43.040 we're gonna get Sparkle, Brook and stuff on in a second. Everybody, Hi, ladies. 0:07:43.920 --> 0:07:48.760 Three out of three we have Brooke, Sparkle and stuff 0:07:49.040 --> 0:07:53.640 um who are on the Hulu show Back in the Groove, 0:07:53.800 --> 0:07:58.000 and I, um, I have we have. Me and Christen 0:07:58.040 --> 0:08:01.680 have a lot of questions, um, because when I was 0:08:01.720 --> 0:08:04.760 reading the breakdown, I was like, oh, these women are 0:08:04.800 --> 0:08:08.560 They're beautiful, but and then I saw dating I'm gonna 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:11.440 go date half their age, and I was just like, oh, 0:08:11.480 --> 0:08:14.440 I have so many questions because I remember I have 0:08:14.480 --> 0:08:19.520 a few younger stories of dating younger. One was great 0:08:19.560 --> 0:08:21.920 and one was tragic. So I'm just curious, like, have 0:08:22.080 --> 0:08:26.000 you guys dated someone younger than you prior to doing 0:08:26.000 --> 0:08:30.240 the show? I have. I have a couple, maybe like 0:08:30.320 --> 0:08:34.800 three relationships that were younger and someone was good. We 0:08:34.800 --> 0:08:38.520 were together for about four years. I just didn't end 0:08:38.640 --> 0:08:42.720 up you know, going into marriage or whatnot. Um, there 0:08:42.800 --> 0:08:46.400 was a bit of a you know, emotional immaturity there. 0:08:46.480 --> 0:08:49.320 We weren't on the same page after you know, three 0:08:49.440 --> 0:08:52.240 or four years. So that was that. And then the 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:56.000 other one, UM was very tragic. It was very dysfunctional, 0:08:56.160 --> 0:09:01.240 very toxic. Um. So yeah, you know, I've never I 0:09:01.280 --> 0:09:04.800 wasn't always into younger guys or you know, when I 0:09:04.880 --> 0:09:08.320 was in my twenties thirties, I always dated my age, 0:09:08.480 --> 0:09:11.800 but as I got older, younger men kind of were 0:09:11.800 --> 0:09:14.840 always approaching me. So I was just like, okay, why not. 0:09:15.520 --> 0:09:18.800 But um, yeah, I mean they bring like a you 0:09:18.840 --> 0:09:24.239 know vibe, you know, a vibrant energy and their fun um. 0:09:24.280 --> 0:09:27.920 But they typically bring abs as well, which is nice. Yes, 0:09:29.400 --> 0:09:32.880 I'm a personal trainer, so it's you know important for 0:09:32.920 --> 0:09:35.680 me to have like to be with a guy who's 0:09:36.160 --> 0:09:39.240 taking care of himself and whatnot, and you know, it's 0:09:39.280 --> 0:09:43.240 never hurts, so but yes, it depends on the man. 0:09:43.320 --> 0:09:47.840 It depends on their life experience. But yeah, I've had 0:09:47.880 --> 0:09:50.640 a little bit of both. So here's a question, and 0:09:50.679 --> 0:09:52.600 I don't know. If you all don't feel like sharing it, 0:09:52.679 --> 0:09:54.920 that's fine. But you look so young to me that, like, 0:09:55.000 --> 0:09:58.200 to me, half your age would be about twelve. So 0:09:58.240 --> 0:10:01.320 I'm confused what are we we're dealing with here because 0:10:01.360 --> 0:10:04.120 you all look so young and beautiful? Well thank you? 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:08.760 Um yeah, not half my age, definitely not. You guys 0:10:08.800 --> 0:10:13.920 are in your forties, right, I'm forty three now, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:10:14.000 --> 0:10:15.440 that's because when I was reading, I was like, all right, like, 0:10:15.480 --> 0:10:18.480 you know, forties, and I'm like, have you been married? 0:10:18.559 --> 0:10:20.400 Have you guys all been married before? Or or no? 0:10:20.920 --> 0:10:23.720 I have Okay, how long were you married? For? Staff? 0:10:24.600 --> 0:10:30.160 For like two weeks? Amazing? Same kind one of those. 0:10:30.520 --> 0:10:32.600 We were in a situation we were really really young. 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:36.319 I married my son's dad, and you know, I just 0:10:36.400 --> 0:10:38.040 it was just kind of one of those things where 0:10:38.080 --> 0:10:40.440 it was just like, all right, well, we're young, we 0:10:40.440 --> 0:10:42.360 don't really want to do this, but my mom was like, no, 0:10:42.520 --> 0:10:45.240 you have to. You know, you have kids now, and 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:47.240 this is you know what it is. So we got 0:10:47.240 --> 0:10:49.520 married and after we got married, we just realized that 0:10:49.679 --> 0:10:51.880 we weren't getting along. So, you know, it was just 0:10:51.960 --> 0:10:55.280 one of those things where we didn't want to, um, 0:10:55.320 --> 0:10:57.760 you know, raise children in a household where they didn't 0:10:57.760 --> 0:11:01.720 see their parents, um, loving on each other and showing 0:11:01.800 --> 0:11:04.000 each other love and you know, growing up in a 0:11:04.000 --> 0:11:06.920 really happy home, you know, versus you know, raising kids 0:11:06.920 --> 0:11:10.160 in an environment where you're constantly arguing and you're fighting 0:11:10.160 --> 0:11:13.200 and there's always something going on. So I was mainteened. 0:11:13.320 --> 0:11:15.400 So it was just one of those things where I 0:11:15.400 --> 0:11:18.800 should have been reading books as a most playing house, 0:11:19.400 --> 0:11:21.600 you know. But you know we did that. We you know, 0:11:21.679 --> 0:11:24.439 as far as with dating younger, I've only done three years. 0:11:24.520 --> 0:11:27.400 So this has been a whole brand new experience for 0:11:27.480 --> 0:11:31.520 me totally. So we're trying nineteen over again. That was happening. 0:11:32.920 --> 0:11:34.959 It was just I don't know, things just about it buzzing. 0:11:35.000 --> 0:11:37.080 I was like, okay, let's just try something new, you know, 0:11:37.160 --> 0:11:41.760 why not. I think there's something to where um, you know, 0:11:41.800 --> 0:11:45.640 now that I'm single and you know, divorced now at 0:11:45.640 --> 0:11:47.439 almost a year and a half or more than that, 0:11:47.480 --> 0:11:50.679 but the younger guys, there is something to be said 0:11:50.760 --> 0:11:54.240 that they definitely again, I'm I'm gonna be forty next year. 0:11:55.080 --> 0:11:58.440 They they really do make you feel like a queen. 0:11:59.080 --> 0:12:04.880 Mm hmm um. I I just don't think I would be. 0:12:05.160 --> 0:12:06.720 I don't know, I'm just thinking about now. I'm like, 0:12:06.800 --> 0:12:12.880 I think there's that piece of um. It's I've rarely 0:12:12.880 --> 0:12:17.000 found someone under, you know, Like I've kind of sat 0:12:17.040 --> 0:12:19.080 like I don't want to go below thirty five because 0:12:19.120 --> 0:12:23.800 when when it ducks into that like thirty, I mean, 0:12:23.840 --> 0:12:26.360 there's just so much. It's like I'm a mom and 0:12:26.400 --> 0:12:31.440 it's like are they you know, are they secure, confident? 0:12:31.720 --> 0:12:35.480 Um mature? It's like you'd have to find I would 0:12:35.480 --> 0:12:39.400 have to find a very old young for it for 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:41.640 me personally, because I'm like, I don't have I don't 0:12:41.640 --> 0:12:44.800 want just an f buddy, right, So it's like do 0:12:44.840 --> 0:12:46.319 you do when you guys wanted to this, Like did 0:12:46.360 --> 0:12:48.320 you Are you looking at it from like I'm trying 0:12:48.320 --> 0:12:50.439 to find my one or is like I'm just gonna 0:12:50.559 --> 0:12:52.480 be fun because I think I think there's a season 0:12:52.520 --> 0:12:54.079 for both right where it's like, yeah, I'm gonna go. 0:12:54.280 --> 0:12:56.199 Like my girlfriend just slept with like a really young 0:12:56.360 --> 0:12:58.360 dude whatever, and she's like whatever, this is a fun 0:12:58.400 --> 0:13:01.400 piece time in my life and like who cares? But like, 0:13:01.679 --> 0:13:03.720 or are you actually going on thinking? Like okay, like 0:13:03.760 --> 0:13:06.400 I could actually find my one among these younger guys. 0:13:07.840 --> 0:13:10.320 I went out there just to have a good time. Yeah, 0:13:10.559 --> 0:13:12.840 you know, it was just I didn't. I was just 0:13:12.880 --> 0:13:16.520 really open to like the possibility of you know, maybe 0:13:16.559 --> 0:13:19.640 meeting someone who is so amazing that changes my mind 0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:21.480 and makes me think, you know what, maybe I can 0:13:21.559 --> 0:13:23.480 give this a shot. But you know, I had like 0:13:23.480 --> 0:13:25.319 a really rough year, you know, with the cancer and 0:13:25.360 --> 0:13:28.280 then my surgery and stuff. So I wasn't really like, Okay, 0:13:28.320 --> 0:13:30.600 I just I just wanted to have fun and whatever 0:13:30.720 --> 0:13:34.840 fun meant, whatever fund meant, or whoever fun with meant, 0:13:34.880 --> 0:13:37.679 you know whatever, That's what I wanted to do. And 0:13:37.720 --> 0:13:42.720 I didn't. Yeah, I sparkle, what about what about you? Ben? Well? 0:13:43.640 --> 0:13:46.520 I also went to I'm gonna type of person. I'll 0:13:46.559 --> 0:13:51.120 try anything once. And I David someone a few years younger, 0:13:51.520 --> 0:13:55.360 not significantly younger. UM. I have always, um wonder what 0:13:55.400 --> 0:13:57.720 it would like, wonder what it'd be like to date, 0:13:58.440 --> 0:14:00.400 you know, with an age gap. I have even really 0:14:00.440 --> 0:14:02.719 dating me abouty much older, except one time that was 0:14:02.760 --> 0:14:05.560 a horror story. So I was anxious, you know, to 0:14:05.600 --> 0:14:08.480 meet somebody younger and just to see because I don't, 0:14:08.600 --> 0:14:10.960 you know, I feel like age is just a number. 0:14:11.559 --> 0:14:13.800 I want to have fun as well. I've been married. 0:14:13.840 --> 0:14:15.480 I got married at a high school when I had 0:14:15.480 --> 0:14:18.280 a baby two years after that, and then I was 0:14:18.360 --> 0:14:20.640 running my business for twenty years, so I was kind 0:14:20.680 --> 0:14:24.080 of ready to let go of being so serious. I'm 0:14:24.080 --> 0:14:27.200 just to see what else was out there. So I 0:14:27.320 --> 0:14:31.400 also went to have fun. So I married. My first 0:14:31.520 --> 0:14:35.080 husband was five years younger than me, and it was 0:14:35.160 --> 0:14:37.440 really great for the first few years, I think, just 0:14:37.480 --> 0:14:40.080 like the passion and the craziness, and then there was 0:14:40.160 --> 0:14:42.400 this I feel like a period of time where I 0:14:42.480 --> 0:14:44.600 super sped up and he kind of stayed the same, 0:14:45.600 --> 0:14:48.400 and I became kind of mother like is that a 0:14:48.440 --> 0:14:51.040 fear that you have or something you've experienced before, Like, 0:14:51.120 --> 0:14:53.280 because it is a tendency in just women in general 0:14:53.280 --> 0:14:55.200 to be so nurturing that we can kind of take 0:14:55.200 --> 0:14:58.440 this like a weird rule over and become mother like 0:14:58.600 --> 0:15:02.280 to these younger guys. I think that's why my relationships 0:15:02.280 --> 0:15:06.640 didn't work out, because there was this stagnicity of growth 0:15:07.000 --> 0:15:10.480 um and I was became resentful and I wasn't. I 0:15:10.520 --> 0:15:15.440 lost some respect for him, and so yeah, there's definitely that, UM, 0:15:15.480 --> 0:15:19.120 but I think that can happen and with any relationship 0:15:19.200 --> 0:15:23.520 really matter how old the guy is, um. There you 0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:25.480 have to really be on the same page with someone. 0:15:25.520 --> 0:15:28.760 And you know, a relationship lasts only if you guys 0:15:28.800 --> 0:15:33.080 are on that same path and continuously growing. So UM, 0:15:33.240 --> 0:15:35.880 trust me, I've had I know, a lot of marriages, 0:15:36.200 --> 0:15:41.800 you know, friends that you know, relationships have stopped, um 0:15:41.880 --> 0:15:44.240 and ended because of those same issues and they're the 0:15:44.280 --> 0:15:47.160 same age or you know, they're older than my problems. 0:15:47.200 --> 0:15:49.800 But I think it's just, you know, it really depends 0:15:49.840 --> 0:15:53.880 on the person and their willingness to work and do 0:15:53.960 --> 0:15:58.040 the work and be committed to the relationship and love 0:15:58.080 --> 0:16:01.720 each other. And but yeah, there's a lot of that. 0:16:01.880 --> 0:16:04.880 I am taking a step back, Like I came into 0:16:05.320 --> 0:16:08.480 this experience and went on the island and had this 0:16:08.680 --> 0:16:12.960 you know, wanted to have this amazing experience. But you know, 0:16:13.120 --> 0:16:15.720 of course with the younger men, but I've always wanted 0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:19.160 to find my person. I've never been married. I've been 0:16:19.200 --> 0:16:22.880 engaged in my twenties and have gone through you know, 0:16:22.960 --> 0:16:26.080 long term relationships and I just have never found the 0:16:26.120 --> 0:16:30.520 one that you know as my life partner. So regardless 0:16:30.560 --> 0:16:32.360 of they were, if I was going on the island 0:16:32.400 --> 0:16:35.600 to meet younger guys or my age or whatever, I'm 0:16:35.680 --> 0:16:41.160 still looking for my person even to this day. So, um, 0:16:41.200 --> 0:16:43.240 you know, I'm still looking for my person no matter what. 0:16:43.360 --> 0:16:45.560 So spoiler alert, you don't end up with the person, 0:16:45.600 --> 0:16:49.480 then on the show, you'll have to see you. I'm 0:16:49.600 --> 0:16:51.520 so excited. But I think, like the staff, it goes 0:16:51.560 --> 0:16:54.760 back to like what you said to and it's especially 0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:58.520 like the closer I am to forty, I'm I'm kind 0:16:58.520 --> 0:17:00.720 of like I look at things in seasons, right, So 0:17:00.760 --> 0:17:03.160 it's like after my divorce or this past summer, I 0:17:03.160 --> 0:17:04.800 was like I had h hockerel summer and it was 0:17:04.840 --> 0:17:06.320 so fun and because I didn't want to be in 0:17:06.320 --> 0:17:08.000 a relationship and I just wanted to have fun. And 0:17:08.040 --> 0:17:10.760 I think it's okay to like have these different seasons, 0:17:10.800 --> 0:17:13.480 and um, you know, at first, when I was reading 0:17:13.480 --> 0:17:15.640 the breakdown, I was like, oh, like, you know, these 0:17:15.960 --> 0:17:18.040 these girls are beautiful, and like I really want them 0:17:18.040 --> 0:17:19.680 to find their one and I wish that they would 0:17:19.720 --> 0:17:21.760 also maybe thrown in you know guys. But I also 0:17:21.760 --> 0:17:23.719 know it's a TV show and that's a different twist 0:17:23.760 --> 0:17:26.719 to to it. And again that like fun opportunity, So 0:17:26.760 --> 0:17:30.400 that's that's awesome. Um So yeah, I can definitely see 0:17:30.400 --> 0:17:31.679 like how you would look at it that way and go, 0:17:31.800 --> 0:17:33.720 you just went for you know, a good time and 0:17:34.440 --> 0:17:36.959 um and who knows. And I think age is truly 0:17:37.040 --> 0:17:39.439 just a number. But I think it's just when I 0:17:39.600 --> 0:17:42.880 draw from personal experience, I'm just like, like, what would 0:17:42.880 --> 0:17:44.600 I you know, what would fit best with like me 0:17:44.680 --> 0:17:46.520 and the kids. And at the end the day, it's 0:17:46.560 --> 0:17:49.280 like it is it's not the guy who knows how old, 0:17:49.359 --> 0:17:52.080 but it just has to be the right fit. Um 0:17:52.119 --> 0:17:54.040 So Ta Digs as the host of this and I 0:17:54.040 --> 0:17:56.520 want to talk about if anybody found Ta Digs to 0:17:56.520 --> 0:17:59.359 be there one because he used to be everything to 0:17:59.440 --> 0:18:01.800 me a feet I would say like, what when was 0:18:01.840 --> 0:18:07.680 he a big deal to us? He is? He canceled 0:18:07.800 --> 0:18:10.199 that question in the world of guys that are in 0:18:10.280 --> 0:18:13.880 relationships and they act singles. So I don't think any 0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:15.359 of us were looking at you that way. We just 0:18:15.400 --> 0:18:16.720 kind of saw me. It was just really cool and 0:18:16.800 --> 0:18:18.520 he was, you know, he was really funny and stuff. 0:18:18.560 --> 0:18:23.280 So I'm focused on the guys there, and that's fair. 0:18:23.560 --> 0:18:25.760 I just got excited when I saw Tay I. I 0:18:25.760 --> 0:18:28.720 didn't know he was in a relationship be there, but 0:18:28.840 --> 0:18:31.640 they know and that's important exactly. That's good. That's good. 0:18:31.800 --> 0:18:34.480 So did you girls have to because obviously we haven't 0:18:34.480 --> 0:18:36.520 seen the show yet, but have you guys? Did you 0:18:36.560 --> 0:18:40.040 have to like like fight to like pick a guy, 0:18:40.160 --> 0:18:41.560 like what if one of you guys like the same 0:18:41.600 --> 0:18:43.720 guy or how or is it like you guys both 0:18:43.920 --> 0:18:48.560 just got your own little bundle of boys setting over us. Yeah, 0:18:48.600 --> 0:18:53.240 there was no time. Yeah, it was never and never 0:18:53.280 --> 0:18:56.680 a time that any guy that we could have potentially 0:18:57.000 --> 0:19:01.120 you know, been into. It never overlaps. So that all 0:19:01.160 --> 0:19:04.240 that worked out and we were into some pretty cute guys. 0:19:04.320 --> 0:19:07.040 You know, we all had our fete favorites and it 0:19:07.200 --> 0:19:10.520 just never it just never overlapped. So that was really good. 0:19:10.680 --> 0:19:12.080 I love that Chris and i Ey gets mad at 0:19:12.080 --> 0:19:14.359 me whenever I'm like, oh, this is actually pretty funny. 0:19:14.359 --> 0:19:18.720 One of my girlfriends boy this check. I guess my 0:19:18.840 --> 0:19:20.959 ex husband didn't know that we were friends, and he 0:19:21.040 --> 0:19:24.879 liked her profile on a dating app and she was like, 0:19:25.000 --> 0:19:27.040 oh my gosh, I'm dad look who liked my profile, 0:19:27.119 --> 0:19:28.680 And so then I sent it to my AX and 0:19:28.720 --> 0:19:30.280 I said, hey, do you wanna do women to hook 0:19:30.280 --> 0:19:32.359 it up? Because she's like a girlfriend of mine. Because 0:19:32.400 --> 0:19:34.280 I'm like, I just want people to find their ones, 0:19:34.400 --> 0:19:37.320 you know what I mean, Like I'm not like ed 0:19:37.359 --> 0:19:39.399 straight up make out with somebody and be like not 0:19:39.480 --> 0:19:42.479 for me, but you know who would love this? And 0:19:42.480 --> 0:19:44.960 I'm like, what is happening? That is just not how 0:19:45.000 --> 0:19:47.280 I operate. I just want people to find their one. 0:19:47.359 --> 0:19:49.440 Something might not work for me but work for someone else. 0:19:49.480 --> 0:19:52.080 And I don't know, does any okay kind of have 0:19:52.160 --> 0:19:54.600 a scenario We did kind of have a scenario where 0:19:54.680 --> 0:19:57.120 two of us had a couple of us had maybe 0:19:57.119 --> 0:19:59.800 a common interest kind of and then the other ones, 0:20:00.080 --> 0:20:02.359 the other ones like go for it, yeah, and we 0:20:02.359 --> 0:20:04.800 were like, are you sure? I think that's our age 0:20:04.800 --> 0:20:06.280 again too, though I think it's the girls in their 0:20:06.320 --> 0:20:08.679 forties who are just kind of like, you know, we 0:20:08.800 --> 0:20:13.280 want people to what would you say stuff? Oh yeah yeah, 0:20:13.280 --> 0:20:15.280 but we're just thinking when we're at our age now, 0:20:15.359 --> 0:20:18.280 it's just like we you know, we're not going to settle, 0:20:18.880 --> 0:20:21.120 right because I mean, especially like Brookly you were saying, 0:20:21.160 --> 0:20:22.919 I mean, you've you know, you're you're you're not going 0:20:22.960 --> 0:20:25.000 to settle, You've you've waited. It's like, so you're gonna 0:20:25.040 --> 0:20:26.640 you're gonna wait for your one. So it's like if 0:20:26.680 --> 0:20:29.000 someone doesn't work out for you, there's no hard feelings 0:20:29.000 --> 0:20:31.439 to go, Hey, this might work out for Jessica. I 0:20:31.440 --> 0:20:33.800 don't know, and don't you also agree? Like at our age, 0:20:33.840 --> 0:20:36.120 So I just I'll be forty one in a couple 0:20:36.119 --> 0:20:39.640 of months, and I feel like our intuition is so 0:20:40.240 --> 0:20:42.880 like it's getting super clear now, so it's like if 0:20:42.880 --> 0:20:44.840 it's not, you just know kind of quickly do you 0:20:44.880 --> 0:20:52.240 agree with? Yeah? I know totally. Yeah. About it too 0:20:52.359 --> 0:20:55.560 was that we all were we all liked what we liked, 0:20:56.160 --> 0:20:59.879 so we really like overstepped like what Brook like. Spark 0:21:00.040 --> 0:21:01.639 and I really didn't like like it. I mean, it 0:21:01.680 --> 0:21:02.919 wasn't that we didn't like it, but it was just 0:21:02.960 --> 0:21:04.640 like that's just not our vibe, you know what I mean? 0:21:04.680 --> 0:21:06.879 And then were Sparkle and I we were just so 0:21:07.240 --> 0:21:09.600 in tune with what you know, with each other and 0:21:09.600 --> 0:21:12.159 what we like. I think everybody was just like you 0:21:12.200 --> 0:21:13.760 like him or you want to look at you said, 0:21:14.520 --> 0:21:24.240 you know, everybody, damn wait, can we like, since I'm 0:21:24.280 --> 0:21:26.240 like single too, can we all go on like a 0:21:26.320 --> 0:21:29.680 girl's like Miami trip please and just like Miami, but 0:21:29.800 --> 0:21:32.560 you guys can come, Oh my god done. I'm like, 0:21:32.600 --> 0:21:35.120 I got our week off in December, so like how 0:21:35.200 --> 0:21:36.800 fun would that be just to go I'm like and 0:21:36.840 --> 0:21:38.560 be like, all right, you got that one. I got 0:21:38.600 --> 0:21:42.440 that one. And then we're just like each other's We 0:21:42.440 --> 0:21:45.400 were each other's wing man. We each other's wing man. 0:21:46.160 --> 0:21:48.520 We did a little bit of gossip in had to 0:21:48.600 --> 0:21:51.600 kind of change data. So this really had his benefits. 0:21:51.600 --> 0:21:53.639 So when we go on his girl trip, we'll be 0:21:53.680 --> 0:21:57.280 able to you know, we've been put it together intulate 0:21:57.480 --> 0:22:00.280 because I think it's like again like we have and 0:22:00.280 --> 0:22:03.359 I think Kristen always says it too like the older 0:22:03.400 --> 0:22:05.359 and we get we're like you said, we listen to 0:22:05.359 --> 0:22:08.600 ourselves more were And my therapist was just saying to it, 0:22:08.600 --> 0:22:11.560 she's just like your your body is letting you know 0:22:11.600 --> 0:22:14.719 when something isn't safe for when it's um triggering you 0:22:14.840 --> 0:22:17.600 so like and you're listening to that more and so 0:22:17.640 --> 0:22:20.720 I think that's such a good a good thing to 0:22:20.800 --> 0:22:23.239 have and you know, um, I don't know. I'm just 0:22:23.280 --> 0:22:26.640 like it's all it's all good, like I'm excited. Okay, wait, 0:22:26.680 --> 0:22:29.120 so there's three of you on this island, Tay Digs, 0:22:29.119 --> 0:22:31.119 I just want to mention one more time. And then also, 0:22:31.480 --> 0:22:34.720 how many how many of this like young man collection 0:22:34.800 --> 0:22:40.080 have we brought to the island? What started with twenty 0:22:40.080 --> 0:22:51.000 four men? Yeah? What's their ages? Roughly? Uh one to 0:22:51.160 --> 0:22:59.480 what they're getting three? Okay? Right? Yeah, yeah, very and yeah. 0:23:02.000 --> 0:23:07.359 I to have fun. I came here and I'm still 0:23:07.720 --> 0:23:12.680 let's just say I'm still having fun. Oh, I got spark. 0:23:12.880 --> 0:23:18.760 I can you guys? I really am interested to Brooke 0:23:18.800 --> 0:23:21.000 has this look on her face like she just has 0:23:21.040 --> 0:23:23.040 some information that she's not allowed to share, and I'm 0:23:23.040 --> 0:23:26.840 just really excited to watch her. I can just tell 0:23:26.880 --> 0:23:29.960 there's something. There's so much we can't share. I know 0:23:30.119 --> 0:23:33.679 you can't. And I'll give you an I'll give you 0:23:33.720 --> 0:23:38.480 a hand. What is gonna give us? I'll say, I 0:23:38.560 --> 0:23:42.160 give you a hand, Brook, I give you a hand. 0:23:42.160 --> 0:23:48.960 Brook has another nickname. It's all dress Brook. Watch out 0:23:49.640 --> 0:23:55.679 Wait what is it called dress red Dress Brook? That 0:23:55.680 --> 0:23:59.000 that's that's the author ego that we never knew existed. 0:24:00.440 --> 0:24:03.280 And one of those young strapping men with abs just 0:24:03.400 --> 0:24:09.560 came in unlocked red dress Brooks One Lady, Was it 0:24:09.640 --> 0:24:18.080 one or was it a few? Ess? Flavorful sparks. I've 0:24:18.080 --> 0:24:21.480 had a variety of flavors on the island, so it 0:24:21.560 --> 0:24:25.320 was a lot of fun. I cannot this is I 0:24:25.560 --> 0:24:27.720 cannot wait to watch. It's something just so up my 0:24:27.760 --> 0:24:32.480 alley because I'm so like, there's nothing against the bachelorettes 0:24:32.480 --> 0:24:35.359 that have been on, but there's something about women that 0:24:35.400 --> 0:24:40.320 are the same age and just like watching experience life, 0:24:41.000 --> 0:24:42.919 knowing the things that we've all been through. And so 0:24:43.000 --> 0:24:45.199 it's I'm excited to watch that because I'm like I 0:24:45.240 --> 0:24:49.320 can relate to y'all versus watching a twenty five year 0:24:49.320 --> 0:24:53.960 old girl. Yeah, I just I can't being done. And 0:24:54.000 --> 0:24:57.639 it's about time that, you know, we see women in 0:24:57.680 --> 0:25:01.840 their forties, late thirties, forty isn't just full of life, 0:25:01.840 --> 0:25:05.040 still just wanting to find love or just have some fun. 0:25:05.160 --> 0:25:08.840 And you know, life's not over, Life's just beginning. You know. 0:25:09.640 --> 0:25:12.040 It's I think done that too, especially like when you 0:25:12.080 --> 0:25:14.600 get to your forties or your thirties, days just automatically 0:25:14.640 --> 0:25:17.720 assume like, okay, well you guys are getting older now. 0:25:17.760 --> 0:25:21.080 So it's it's done for you where we feel like, 0:25:21.240 --> 0:25:23.879 you know, you know, you're getting into your forties, just 0:25:23.920 --> 0:25:26.800 turned forty two, so it's like I feel like I'm 0:25:26.880 --> 0:25:29.080 just getting started. Like I feel like, you know what 0:25:29.119 --> 0:25:32.480 I mean, Like I'm alive. Like certain things, you know, 0:25:32.560 --> 0:25:35.520 my sentences are heightened. Everything just looks different. I'm a 0:25:35.640 --> 0:25:38.840 tractor to different things now. You know, when we were younger, 0:25:38.880 --> 0:25:41.760 it was like you weren't really looking too deep into things, 0:25:41.840 --> 0:25:43.199 you know what I mean. Everything was like kind of 0:25:43.240 --> 0:25:46.159 surface level kind of way. You know. Now it's like, 0:25:46.320 --> 0:25:48.959 I don't know, it's a lot hotter now, it's it's sexier, 0:25:49.040 --> 0:25:52.240 it's spicier, it's a you know, the chemistry is different 0:25:52.280 --> 0:25:56.480 than yourself having this type of a show like this 0:25:56.640 --> 0:25:59.080 because you know, so we you never see that on TV. 0:25:59.160 --> 0:26:01.639 You see all the younger girls, but what happens after 0:26:02.320 --> 0:26:04.399 because we all, you know, we all grow past thirty, 0:26:04.640 --> 0:26:07.240 you know, and you know, so it's like, you know, 0:26:07.280 --> 0:26:10.919 when you get to forty, it's not over. So I 0:26:10.960 --> 0:26:13.280 really I really appreciate this type of show and then 0:26:13.560 --> 0:26:15.280 making something like this to show the rest of the 0:26:15.320 --> 0:26:18.080 ladies that you could still be forty. Yeah, And that's 0:26:18.160 --> 0:26:21.040 and that's why I'm like I genuinely was like, oh 0:26:21.080 --> 0:26:22.840 my god, these ones are my girls, Like they're like 0:26:22.880 --> 0:26:25.479 they're my age. Like this, I'm gonna watch this because 0:26:26.200 --> 0:26:28.439 like that's the kind of stuff that like I can 0:26:28.480 --> 0:26:31.119 relate to. And yeah, maybe not relating to the twenty 0:26:31.160 --> 0:26:33.600 two year old guy, but like the season of like 0:26:33.640 --> 0:26:35.920 the fun again and remembering I can remember how Girls 0:26:35.920 --> 0:26:37.800 summer and like, you know, it's like it's just cool, 0:26:37.880 --> 0:26:39.880 like to relate to like what you guys have all 0:26:39.920 --> 0:26:41.720 gone through and then again our ages. It's like, I 0:26:41.760 --> 0:26:43.680 just I love that so much more and I'm glad 0:26:43.680 --> 0:26:46.320 that who was doing that. Like we like know ourselves 0:26:46.400 --> 0:26:49.480 at this point in our lives. We're not ways time 0:26:50.000 --> 0:26:52.720 and we own what stage or what season we're in. 0:26:53.200 --> 0:26:55.000 If you want to have a heart Gil Summer, like 0:26:55.280 --> 0:26:58.040 we do it, girl, and we own it and we're 0:26:58.080 --> 0:27:00.800 not ashamed of it. And we're living the lives we 0:27:00.840 --> 0:27:04.160 want to live. So it's like empowering. It's it's not 0:27:04.280 --> 0:27:07.120 we're not living for someone else anymore. You know, we've 0:27:07.119 --> 0:27:11.159 gone through so much in our lives. Um, you know 0:27:11.760 --> 0:27:15.280 basically shoot me, you know, shoot me up and spit 0:27:15.359 --> 0:27:18.240 me out, and um when I went on the show, 0:27:18.280 --> 0:27:22.000 it was like I was finally needing that escape and 0:27:22.119 --> 0:27:25.800 it was exactly what I needed, just to find myself again, 0:27:26.119 --> 0:27:29.879 um and have some fun. So I hope it's inspiring 0:27:29.960 --> 0:27:32.320 to the younger girls too. You know, there's a lot 0:27:32.359 --> 0:27:34.160 of twenties some things out there that feel like they've 0:27:34.240 --> 0:27:35.480 kind of grown up. And I don't know if you'll 0:27:35.480 --> 0:27:37.399 ever felt like this, but I came from a pretty 0:27:37.400 --> 0:27:39.720 tiny town where it was like prom engagement babies, so 0:27:39.760 --> 0:27:42.720 if you weren't married right away, it was whatever. And 0:27:42.760 --> 0:27:46.760 I just have spoken this word over our younger generation 0:27:46.800 --> 0:27:49.359 so often, like you just find you and the rest 0:27:49.359 --> 0:27:52.119 will figure itself out. And I hope that these younger 0:27:52.160 --> 0:27:55.480 girls get to see three stunning in their forty year 0:27:55.480 --> 0:27:58.479 old women just living their best life and knowing exactly 0:27:58.480 --> 0:28:01.440 who they are, listening to their intuition and not settling 0:28:01.440 --> 0:28:03.719 for anything less. That's like the key to It's like 0:28:04.000 --> 0:28:06.280 because you guys know you're not going to be alone forever, 0:28:06.480 --> 0:28:09.119 Like it's you might not find them for a while. 0:28:09.160 --> 0:28:10.800 But again, it's like that's kind of where I was 0:28:10.920 --> 0:28:14.239 telling person before the show, Well, I was at the 0:28:14.240 --> 0:28:16.800 therapist today. She was like, we were kind of talking 0:28:16.840 --> 0:28:19.119 about like how I was, you know, actually looking like 0:28:19.160 --> 0:28:22.119 I stayed last year in a relationship that was toxic 0:28:22.119 --> 0:28:23.600 because I didn't want to be alone for the holidays, 0:28:23.600 --> 0:28:25.800 and now this year, I'm like, I'm looking forward to 0:28:25.840 --> 0:28:27.399 being alone for the holidays. And she was saying that 0:28:27.400 --> 0:28:29.919 there was like this like um sacred window where she's like, 0:28:30.240 --> 0:28:32.280 there's a chair, and she's like, if you keep it 0:28:32.280 --> 0:28:34.520 occupied with the wrong thing, the person, there's gonna be 0:28:34.520 --> 0:28:37.080 someone that can't sit down that's meant to be next 0:28:37.119 --> 0:28:39.800 to you. And so she's like, you know, she's like, yes, 0:28:39.800 --> 0:28:41.680 it will be people that come and sit down from 0:28:41.720 --> 0:28:43.480 time to time. She's like, but you don't want to 0:28:43.560 --> 0:28:45.680 keep that wrong person sitting there because then you're going 0:28:45.720 --> 0:28:47.440 to miss out. And she's like, and there will be 0:28:47.480 --> 0:28:50.200 someone that occupies that chair in that space. She's like, 0:28:50.240 --> 0:28:53.240 it just might not be you know, in six months 0:28:53.360 --> 0:28:54.800 or a year, whenever it is. She's like, but you 0:28:54.840 --> 0:28:56.600 don't want to you don't want to hold onto something 0:28:56.640 --> 0:28:59.520 that's not who should who should not be sitting there. 0:29:00.080 --> 0:29:02.560 Let's and we know who should not be sitting there, 0:29:02.600 --> 0:29:04.560 and we do, we know in our bodies, Like and 0:29:04.600 --> 0:29:06.880 now that we're again, we're more aware, and that's like 0:29:06.880 --> 0:29:08.760 I think again, coming to the age stuff is like 0:29:09.080 --> 0:29:11.680 your body tells you, you know, and like now we 0:29:11.720 --> 0:29:13.640 have the voice to be like no, I'm good, Like 0:29:13.680 --> 0:29:15.160 I know, I'm not gonna deal one forever. I'm just 0:29:15.200 --> 0:29:18.680 gonna take some more space alone next to the chair. 0:29:18.920 --> 0:29:25.760 I really have an empty chair. I don't want to popularly. 0:29:26.600 --> 0:29:30.160 I know a lot of maybe simber romances that have lasted, 0:29:30.360 --> 0:29:34.000 and they're like full of fire, and I want to say, 0:29:34.440 --> 0:29:37.320 does these days these younger guys, especially some of the 0:29:37.360 --> 0:29:40.640 guys that came to the island were pretty like well 0:29:40.800 --> 0:29:45.720 established and were pretty ambitious and had ambitious goals or 0:29:46.000 --> 0:29:49.640 already had ambitious careers. And you know, it's not just 0:29:49.760 --> 0:29:52.600 the thing where the woman, the older woman has to 0:29:52.640 --> 0:29:54.720 be the cool of his sugar mama or the guy 0:29:54.880 --> 0:29:58.600 has to be the boy toy. These guys were wise, 0:29:58.720 --> 0:30:01.800 they had things to offer. I love them were but 0:30:02.880 --> 0:30:05.360 quite a few of them had things to say, you know, 0:30:05.560 --> 0:30:10.000 and we're just definitely mature. So it just kind of 0:30:10.120 --> 0:30:13.440 like put things in perspectives. Okay, age is really just 0:30:13.920 --> 0:30:17.280 a number. Seriously, I could definitely open myself up to 0:30:17.640 --> 0:30:21.280 you know, seeing what seriously something could be with the 0:30:21.280 --> 0:30:23.720 younger guy because I've never experienced young guy before. But 0:30:24.080 --> 0:30:26.600 going on the show, I was able to see that, Okay, 0:30:27.080 --> 0:30:30.280 this is not just this dynamic where it's like some 0:30:30.520 --> 0:30:33.320 dud and then you know an older mature woman, he's actor, 0:30:33.480 --> 0:30:35.479 you know what she has. This was really, um an 0:30:35.560 --> 0:30:38.160 enlightenment experiencing that. I mean, I found the guys to 0:30:38.240 --> 0:30:42.160 be attractive. I was shocked. I was shocked. What's what's 0:30:42.200 --> 0:30:44.440 one thing that you guys all like to wrap it up? 0:30:44.480 --> 0:30:48.320 Like the one thing where, um, something that you took 0:30:48.360 --> 0:30:51.360 away about yourself, like what you learned about yourself through 0:30:51.400 --> 0:30:55.840 going through the show. In the process, I had a 0:30:55.840 --> 0:30:58.880 bunch of breakdowns and breakthroughs on this show. So I 0:30:59.680 --> 0:31:01.680 feel like I learned. I feel like it's almost like 0:31:01.680 --> 0:31:04.440 a rebirth. It's like, it's my sound so corny, but 0:31:04.480 --> 0:31:07.800 I feel like, um, I went to the show one 0:31:07.800 --> 0:31:12.880 way and I left another way. It was it was 0:31:12.960 --> 0:31:17.480 really like life changing for me. I think eating eating 0:31:17.480 --> 0:31:19.760 my group sisters. It was just like, I don't know, 0:31:19.880 --> 0:31:21.640 it was met in a way. You know, it was 0:31:21.720 --> 0:31:25.880 like wow, it was a really great experience. You know, 0:31:25.960 --> 0:31:29.160 you'll see you'll find out in the episodes, UM, a 0:31:29.160 --> 0:31:31.200 little bit more about each and every one of us. 0:31:31.240 --> 0:31:35.800 But you know, I I stuffered pretty significant loss in 0:31:35.800 --> 0:31:39.480 my life leading up to the show. I was grieving, UM, 0:31:39.560 --> 0:31:43.880 and so the show allowed me to escape my my 0:31:43.960 --> 0:31:49.440 life for a little bit. Sorry, I'm getting a little emotional. UM. Wow, 0:31:49.520 --> 0:31:51.680 you'll never put alone on the show. I promise you. 0:31:52.720 --> 0:31:57.479 Don't you dare to start, I can't. UM allowed me 0:31:57.520 --> 0:32:00.880 to escape my life for a little it and kind 0:32:00.880 --> 0:32:05.480 of really tap into like who I was again. Um, 0:32:05.520 --> 0:32:08.680 and like stuff said, I felt like I was really 0:32:08.720 --> 0:32:11.960 born and I don't you know they say all reality 0:32:12.000 --> 0:32:15.080 TV whatever whatever, but it was. It was the best 0:32:15.120 --> 0:32:19.600 thing that I ever did for myself to reinvent myself, 0:32:19.640 --> 0:32:24.000 to find myself again, to heal. There was some instance 0:32:24.400 --> 0:32:28.840 where we were we we I mean the sisterhood that 0:32:28.880 --> 0:32:32.480 we formed. I am so grateful to this day for 0:32:32.840 --> 0:32:35.880 because without them, I could not I'm not the person 0:32:35.960 --> 0:32:40.520 I am today. And I came back home and I 0:32:40.600 --> 0:32:43.880 knew who I was again. I'm like, yes, this, I 0:32:43.960 --> 0:32:47.760 am Brooke, like Brooke is back and I am so 0:32:47.880 --> 0:32:53.160 confident in myself. The world is my oyster like I am. 0:32:53.200 --> 0:32:55.520 I am just so excited for this new chapter in 0:32:55.560 --> 0:32:59.280 my life. And I couldn't have done it without the girls. 0:32:59.320 --> 0:33:03.120 And I just feel like the Sisterhood Reformed was was everything, 0:33:03.200 --> 0:33:06.240 And we were on this journey together every single day 0:33:06.360 --> 0:33:08.640 from you know, when we woke up to when we 0:33:08.680 --> 0:33:11.719 went to bed. Um, we were together in this and 0:33:12.840 --> 0:33:16.520 I'm just so grateful for it. Um back a new 0:33:16.560 --> 0:33:19.760 woman and I'm I'm I'm on fire. I feel like 0:33:19.800 --> 0:33:23.920 I'm I'm just you know, yeah, read she's she's there, spark. 0:33:24.040 --> 0:33:27.200 What about you? That's that's that's amazing. You know this, 0:33:27.480 --> 0:33:30.719 I would say the same thing. Um, I've rediscovered a 0:33:30.800 --> 0:33:33.400 lot about myself. UM. One of them one of the 0:33:33.440 --> 0:33:35.400 things for strength, you know, and you think, oh, why 0:33:35.480 --> 0:33:37.280 would you think strength? You know? One of them to 0:33:37.360 --> 0:33:40.320 me guys. But you know, it's just a new experience 0:33:40.360 --> 0:33:42.320 for me. Um. I think I'm going through a season 0:33:42.400 --> 0:33:45.360 of so many changes. So I was a little bit scared, 0:33:45.440 --> 0:33:48.440 you know. Um again, I just closed my business for 0:33:48.480 --> 0:33:51.040 twenty years. I don't know anything else. It's all I know. 0:33:52.040 --> 0:33:54.520 My son he just empty and I'm just empty nest 0:33:54.560 --> 0:34:00.160 and you know, my son just left. And now I'm 0:34:00.200 --> 0:34:03.080 embarked on this new journey with these girls, and that 0:34:03.320 --> 0:34:05.400 was probably the most pivotal part, was to be able 0:34:05.440 --> 0:34:09.560 to create these relationships with them. Um, the guys was great, 0:34:09.719 --> 0:34:13.360 but I had a permanent sisterhood. Uh. This relationship that 0:34:13.400 --> 0:34:18.280 we force, it's just amazing. We still talk every day everybody. 0:34:18.760 --> 0:34:21.440 We're not talking about anything at all. We are always 0:34:21.520 --> 0:34:24.879 connected to one another, and that is priceless. I'm gonna 0:34:24.920 --> 0:34:26.719 carry that with me for the rest of my life. 0:34:26.760 --> 0:34:31.879 This experience was the experience of my time. Unnot wait 0:34:31.960 --> 0:34:34.680 to watch you now. Girl. It's entially rarity to have 0:34:34.719 --> 0:34:37.359 people come out of reality TV and all three feel 0:34:37.400 --> 0:34:39.839 the way you guys feel. The ladies feel the way 0:34:39.840 --> 0:34:45.359 you feel. Really special, that's great. You should be part 0:34:45.360 --> 0:34:48.399 of our little group chats and all the stuff. I mean, 0:34:48.640 --> 0:34:51.680 would love and I want you girls way more fun 0:34:51.680 --> 0:34:54.400 and group. Yeah, I'm just married with a couple of babies. 0:34:54.480 --> 0:34:59.359 But I'm here for the commentary. Oh well girls, I'm 0:34:59.400 --> 0:35:01.719 so excited to show. We'll do a girls trip. Um. 0:35:01.840 --> 0:35:03.480 But in the meantime, I'm going to watch Back in 0:35:03.520 --> 0:35:05.759 the Groove and I want everyone to on Hulu. You 0:35:05.840 --> 0:35:08.440 girls are so beautiful and I just yeah, this is 0:35:08.719 --> 0:35:10.960 this is not the end, it's just the beginning. So 0:35:11.520 --> 0:35:15.759 catch us in Miami. Happy birthday, Thank you, thank you 0:35:15.800 --> 0:35:20.600 so much. All right, guys, appreciate chelsee soon by girls. 0:35:34.440 --> 0:35:37.840 These are like fun girlfriends. We need them, yeah, especially 0:35:38.800 --> 0:35:42.640 well it's hard sometimes, like I love my queendom obviously, 0:35:42.960 --> 0:35:47.040 but yeah, but it's you know, you guys are all married. 0:35:47.080 --> 0:35:49.360 I'm the only single one. I know. You had a 0:35:49.440 --> 0:35:52.799 half a chance with Katherine. Go damn real, he was 0:35:52.840 --> 0:35:55.560 like pulling for that one. I'm kidding, I would never. 0:35:56.640 --> 0:36:00.000 I always like, I was so happy, happy, and even 0:36:00.120 --> 0:36:03.080 like when she was like we barely actually start after you, 0:36:03.360 --> 0:36:05.680 You're not the same human. No, like if if I 0:36:05.719 --> 0:36:09.520 would call for you, but I love pressing too much 0:36:09.560 --> 0:36:13.960 to ever acting, but that would be but do you 0:36:13.960 --> 0:36:16.640 know what I mean? Like, yeah, you know because Katherine 0:36:16.600 --> 0:36:19.920 and I speak different love languages, like she she touched 0:36:19.920 --> 0:36:24.239 for instance, yes, that and like she would want to 0:36:24.239 --> 0:36:27.040 be alone, whereas I'm like, let's go to Miami, you know, 0:36:27.160 --> 0:36:28.560 and she was like, or we could just head to 0:36:28.560 --> 0:36:31.160 a craft fair. Like for example, when we were in California, 0:36:31.600 --> 0:36:33.520 me and Kristen were like, we want to go feel 0:36:33.520 --> 0:36:36.720 the sand under our toes and be real, berthed, salted 0:36:36.800 --> 0:36:42.240 air and like and wash aware. Insecurities were like words 0:36:42.280 --> 0:36:44.120 on the beach and the waves and the tide took 0:36:44.160 --> 0:36:45.800 them back to my mother Earth. And we really we 0:36:46.880 --> 0:36:49.680 were like holding hands and just crying and like you know, 0:36:49.800 --> 0:36:52.120 just like praying, and and then we're like, can't you 0:36:52.160 --> 0:36:54.399 want to come? And there's like it's so much fun. 0:36:54.400 --> 0:36:55.840 She's like, I'm just gonna stay here and work in 0:36:55.840 --> 0:36:58.280 the hotel. She's got her laptop and her little tiny 0:36:58.440 --> 0:37:01.319 bag of chocolate crackers and she was like I'm good here, 0:37:02.000 --> 0:37:05.200 like okay. And then when we were there there, I 0:37:05.239 --> 0:37:06.759 was like, oh, this makes so much sense. This is 0:37:06.760 --> 0:37:08.799 not Catherine, Like she'd be rolling her eyes that are 0:37:08.960 --> 0:37:12.760 like write something in the sand to let the way 0:37:12.920 --> 0:37:15.680 do you want to be let's baptize you get She's like, 0:37:15.719 --> 0:37:19.120 I'm good actually, per my last email click click click 0:37:19.280 --> 0:37:21.960 click click click, that's more cats stage. But when we 0:37:22.000 --> 0:37:23.839 came back though, she was so like, oh, this is 0:37:23.880 --> 0:37:27.920 the time I needed to be alone and it was 0:37:27.960 --> 0:37:30.760 so good for us. Yeah, and we were like we'reborn. 0:37:31.200 --> 0:37:33.640 We came back so happy. She was really dealing with 0:37:33.680 --> 0:37:36.880 a lot before we left, oh man. But yeah, so 0:37:37.120 --> 0:37:39.920 sometimes again, I would never want any of mine. That's 0:37:39.920 --> 0:37:43.840 why I'm finding new friendships. Yeah, you have to like Krista, 0:37:43.960 --> 0:37:47.360 like she's you know, she's obviously um someone that it 0:37:47.520 --> 0:37:51.359 was single, and that that's to to have that like 0:37:52.000 --> 0:37:54.960 to go out with or to hang with, or to understand, 0:37:55.040 --> 0:37:57.359 like you know, with the Christmas stuff. I was telling her, 0:37:57.400 --> 0:37:59.839 like we both stayed in like those relationships. Now we're like, oh, 0:38:00.000 --> 0:38:03.360 are so proud of to see each growth and like 0:38:03.480 --> 0:38:05.920 help each other, and so I like to have those 0:38:05.960 --> 0:38:08.000 relationships too. And then the fun one, so like you know, 0:38:08.000 --> 0:38:09.680 like those worlds would be like my like fun when 0:38:09.719 --> 0:38:12.040 I want to, like they are so cute and they're 0:38:12.040 --> 0:38:15.279 actually just so sweet and kind. Yeah, it's interesting because 0:38:15.320 --> 0:38:17.440 I had this relationship with a friend a couple of 0:38:17.520 --> 0:38:20.480 years ago who was married but in a real toxic marriage, 0:38:21.040 --> 0:38:24.520 and I really stayed the course for a long time 0:38:24.520 --> 0:38:26.200 thinking that I don't know, maybe I could just be 0:38:26.280 --> 0:38:27.920 like a sense of light or a sense of like 0:38:28.000 --> 0:38:30.680 reason or whatever, and I didn't quite see it at 0:38:30.719 --> 0:38:34.080 the time of the toxicity kind of took over my 0:38:34.200 --> 0:38:38.719 marriage too, little by little, like so now it's like 0:38:38.760 --> 0:38:40.520 what you're saying, but even in marriage I need to 0:38:40.520 --> 0:38:43.120 find married friends that are like praying for my marriage 0:38:43.120 --> 0:38:46.719 and assuming the best of my husband, or you know, 0:38:46.800 --> 0:38:49.319 like you can vent a little, but really it just 0:38:49.360 --> 0:38:52.640 comes back to like being supportive and trying to help 0:38:52.680 --> 0:38:54.319 each other and navigate it or leave it on a 0:38:54.320 --> 0:38:56.680 good note. And I was in this. I didn't really 0:38:56.719 --> 0:38:58.960 realize how toxic it was at one point, but it 0:38:59.080 --> 0:39:04.680 was so nasty. That's such a um a true thing 0:39:04.719 --> 0:39:06.600 that you just said to because I'm sure, like you know, 0:39:06.640 --> 0:39:08.200 you've come to me obviously and told me things. And 0:39:08.239 --> 0:39:10.440 if I was like, Preston, that's son of a whatever, 0:39:10.880 --> 0:39:14.320 all that bleeds into your then thoughts and yeah, but 0:39:14.320 --> 0:39:16.200 you're always roll around it because you love him. Well no, 0:39:16.280 --> 0:39:18.200 that's what I'm saying. But if I wasn't like and like, 0:39:18.239 --> 0:39:20.040 if you're around people like that, they're just like, oh, 0:39:20.080 --> 0:39:22.760 like he sucks or how could he like that? Again 0:39:22.840 --> 0:39:24.879 bleeds in so then you're gonna start thinking like, yeah, 0:39:24.880 --> 0:39:27.000 he does suck, and then that's going to affect your marriage. 0:39:27.080 --> 0:39:29.840 Whereas you know, if you have people that go, I 0:39:29.880 --> 0:39:32.839 don't like what he did, but like, so how is 0:39:33.160 --> 0:39:36.040 you know, So what's what's y'all's plan? And then, but 0:39:36.040 --> 0:39:37.759 but I love you guys regardless. I know you guys 0:39:37.800 --> 0:39:40.040 are gonna like fight through it. Yeah, it just takes. 0:39:40.120 --> 0:39:43.480 It's it's really finding those friends special are better to 0:39:43.600 --> 0:39:46.280 find people that will pray for you, pray for your relationship, 0:39:46.320 --> 0:39:50.200 pray for your marriage, whatever the season is for anybody. Like, 0:39:50.320 --> 0:39:53.279 remember I liked your ex, I would say I like 0:39:53.360 --> 0:39:56.160 him as long as you like him. Oh yeah, yeah, 0:39:56.360 --> 0:39:59.600 but the minute you stopped liking him, be out right 0:40:00.120 --> 0:40:03.520 because it matters, Like, I'm not gonna you know, you 0:40:03.560 --> 0:40:05.880 just don't. You don't need The world is negative. We 0:40:05.920 --> 0:40:08.120 all have our own insecurities, our own traumas, our own 0:40:08.160 --> 0:40:10.080 pastwork and against us anyway. So the last thing we 0:40:10.120 --> 0:40:13.640 need is some voice that's standing in a friend gap, 0:40:13.920 --> 0:40:17.239 posing as a friend and a supportive person saying you 0:40:17.280 --> 0:40:19.320 know this, this, this and this. It's just not helpful. 0:40:19.400 --> 0:40:22.279 It's like you also are brillly brilliant person, so you 0:40:22.320 --> 0:40:24.680 don't need me to tell you much. Well. I also 0:40:24.680 --> 0:40:26.759 want to say too, though, when you say mentioned that 0:40:26.800 --> 0:40:31.600 about Max. Yes, y'all aren't friends. But for example, if 0:40:31.600 --> 0:40:33.880 you would have came to Jason's party like you would, 0:40:34.120 --> 0:40:37.040 you know you're still you'd still cordial, still nice. It's like, 0:40:37.080 --> 0:40:40.160 that's interesting because I had a moment with that. I 0:40:40.239 --> 0:40:47.120 haven't seen him since the second day, since he came here. 0:40:47.120 --> 0:40:51.040 It was still it was still officially his home, and 0:40:51.160 --> 0:40:54.520 I saw him. I saw him on the stories at 0:40:54.520 --> 0:40:58.480 your party, and I thought I had this Charlotte moment 0:40:58.520 --> 0:41:02.080 from the Sex and as Andy I cursed the day 0:41:02.080 --> 0:41:04.000 you were born. I was like, what would I say 0:41:04.000 --> 0:41:07.279 to him, because my default is to see him just 0:41:07.320 --> 0:41:11.640 as the is a human, you know, not I don't know. 0:41:11.719 --> 0:41:13.640 And I had to have a minute where I was like, Okay, 0:41:13.640 --> 0:41:15.920 I would have to you know, Detroit, Kristen would have 0:41:16.000 --> 0:41:17.480 to go in the back seat, and I would just 0:41:17.520 --> 0:41:19.279 have to be really I would never be mean to 0:41:19.360 --> 0:41:21.239 him anyways, but it was I did have a moment 0:41:21.280 --> 0:41:22.680 I'm not gonna lie with I thought, what would I 0:41:22.719 --> 0:41:25.120 even say to him because I haven't I don't we 0:41:25.160 --> 0:41:26.839 don't have kids in the same soccer group or all 0:41:26.880 --> 0:41:28.360 the things. And I know a lot of the queendom 0:41:28.440 --> 0:41:31.640 has run into him in other situations, so they're like, oh, yeah, 0:41:31.680 --> 0:41:33.120 I saw him, no big deal. And I'm like, I 0:41:33.160 --> 0:41:35.799 haven't seen him in a year and a half, and 0:41:35.840 --> 0:41:39.239 it's okay to have those. I think even like my 0:41:39.320 --> 0:41:42.719 friend um Josh who's the husband of s she was there, 0:41:43.480 --> 0:41:47.160 um uh you know he was just like this was 0:41:47.480 --> 0:41:52.560 really big of you. And he's like, um, he's like 0:41:52.760 --> 0:41:56.920 I see, I know, well yes, but like he's like 0:41:57.400 --> 0:42:00.640 he's like, um, it doesn't take a way any of it. 0:42:00.719 --> 0:42:01.840 He's like, I just want you to know that, like 0:42:01.880 --> 0:42:04.239 it doesn't take away. And I was just like, thank 0:42:04.280 --> 0:42:07.640 you because it's it's not, um I was, you don't 0:42:07.680 --> 0:42:09.520 have The thing is that you don't have to say anything. 0:42:09.520 --> 0:42:12.920 That's the thing because it's just like hi, like because 0:42:13.640 --> 0:42:17.200 there's no point in having like the because you can 0:42:17.200 --> 0:42:19.840 still have your feelings and still be cordial. And I 0:42:19.840 --> 0:42:21.920 think that's like the place that I've gotten to now. 0:42:21.960 --> 0:42:26.040 It's like, well that doesn't take away X Y and Z. 0:42:26.480 --> 0:42:29.440 I would always rather be the group of friends that 0:42:29.480 --> 0:42:33.399 he's like really miss them. You know, of course he would. 0:42:33.440 --> 0:42:35.520 You guys were awesome, But I would rather be that 0:42:35.600 --> 0:42:38.360 person to him always than and not like I'm braiding 0:42:38.400 --> 0:42:40.759 his hair or something if he had any But I'm 0:42:40.800 --> 0:42:43.760 just saying, like just to always be like best foot 0:42:43.800 --> 0:42:47.040 forward and like be you know that the higher road yeah, 0:42:47.080 --> 0:42:50.000 and because again it's just I've really just gotten to 0:42:50.080 --> 0:42:53.960 a place where life is just so short and I 0:42:54.000 --> 0:42:57.600 don't know, and I'm like, I just I don't want 0:42:57.640 --> 0:43:03.279 to hold onto any thing negative or just the things. 0:43:03.320 --> 0:43:05.480 I just I don't want to hold it. It's like 0:43:05.840 --> 0:43:08.600 it doesn't take away from things, but I can still, 0:43:09.800 --> 0:43:12.799 you know, in that time, I was like, Okay, I 0:43:12.800 --> 0:43:14.960 can still in this moment, like do this for my 0:43:15.040 --> 0:43:20.160 children and and just be like to disassociate. Yeah, it's like, 0:43:20.920 --> 0:43:22.840 I don't know, but there's something fun for you in 0:43:22.840 --> 0:43:26.640 your birthday week that I did. Um starting at thirty 0:43:26.719 --> 0:43:30.120 nine up into my fort eve, I started making a 0:43:30.160 --> 0:43:32.160 list of things I would not carry into the year 0:43:32.360 --> 0:43:36.520 into my fourth decade. And I think anybody could do 0:43:36.560 --> 0:43:39.480 it at any age, but I think it's really significant 0:43:39.520 --> 0:43:44.520 between thirty nine and forty to just really decide. And 0:43:44.640 --> 0:43:47.080 the decided heart for a forty year old is so different. 0:43:47.480 --> 0:43:51.680 It's just so life changing. Wow. I love that because like, 0:43:51.719 --> 0:43:54.040 for the next year, I'm going to weed out and 0:43:54.120 --> 0:43:56.840 you just down so I can then at forty because forty, 0:43:56.880 --> 0:43:58.920 it's like, that's why I was kind of thinking, like 0:43:58.960 --> 0:44:00.480 when I was from my thirty nine and just like 0:44:00.560 --> 0:44:02.920 I'm okay being alone. I'm a thirty nine and like 0:44:03.280 --> 0:44:05.239 folding laundry and doing a bubble bath and having a 0:44:05.320 --> 0:44:09.799 quiet house. And then because I know, forty, like the 0:44:09.880 --> 0:44:12.120 year like you said, like the year from I'm gonna 0:44:12.239 --> 0:44:15.160 get rid of all like and just really just like 0:44:15.480 --> 0:44:19.440 share my truths and shed things. And and then forty, 0:44:19.560 --> 0:44:23.960 I want the biggest blowout birthday. I gotta I am 0:44:24.040 --> 0:44:26.279 busy so like and by the way, when need to 0:44:26.320 --> 0:44:28.759 start planning like in January. But I just wanted to 0:44:28.800 --> 0:44:31.839 be this huge bash and just like the celebration of 0:44:31.880 --> 0:44:40.960 like life, the new and the life. Yeah, yeah, okay, um, 0:44:41.120 --> 0:44:45.120 this is good. What a fort empowering episode we've had here, Like, 0:44:45.120 --> 0:44:48.640 it's very empowering today. It is, I like when we 0:44:48.719 --> 0:44:53.240 feel old but still young, right. I love I'm coming 0:44:53.239 --> 0:44:57.399 into this new forty is my freaking favorite. Like I'm like, 0:44:57.400 --> 0:45:01.360 like I get excited. There's something really cool about getting older. 0:45:02.000 --> 0:45:05.160 It's very set apart. It's a difference for sure. Well, 0:45:05.160 --> 0:45:07.400 in the meantime, we're going to eat from the Dixie 0:45:07.520 --> 0:45:14.680 Dixie play cheese cubes on a toothpick if anyone needs um. 0:45:14.719 --> 0:45:16.920 I don't know when this hairs but I love you guys. 0:45:17.120 --> 0:45:20.759 And Happy Birthday by thanks by, I love you.