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Speaker 1: Any, this is any and SMITHA and hocome stuff.

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Speaker 2: I never told you Protection by Heart radio.

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Speaker 1: And welcome to another happy hour in which I just

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Speaker 1: talk about my problems. Shall we do that before we start?

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Speaker 1: Of course, we are not currently being sponsored by anything

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Speaker 1: we are talking about. Unless they do, then you know

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Speaker 1: you'll hear the sponsorship, but right now not necessarily. Also,

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Speaker 1: if you are partaking of happy hour ritual and consuming

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Speaker 1: of adult beverages or such, do so responsibly. We want

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Speaker 1: you to be healthy, y'all. Any are you sipping on anything?

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Speaker 2: Nothing special, nothing.

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Speaker 1: Special, but if you're drinking it, it's special.

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Speaker 2: No, thank you. I'm drinking cold coffee, and I actually

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Speaker 2: remember today that I used to have a saying with

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Speaker 2: my friends. When the coffee is cold, the conversation is done.

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Speaker 2: So well, yeah, so Samantha.

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Speaker 1: Now oh no, yes, Well, I am drinking some bubble

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Speaker 1: water with some electoral lights because I'm gonna try to

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Speaker 1: stay hydrated, like a hydrated coin over here. Yeah. So

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Speaker 1: today I decided I wanted to talk a little bit

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Speaker 1: about my introversion because recently, I don't know if y'all

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Speaker 1: heard today is by the way. June seventeenth, twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 1: So the day we're recording this comes out on Juneteenth.

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Speaker 1: Happy June tenth everyone to those who celebrate, Love you.

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Speaker 1: But what we just had the No Kings protests all

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Speaker 1: over the country and millions of people showed up in Atlanta,

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Speaker 1: thousands of people showed up and came to the rally.

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Speaker 1: They mixed out the area that was reserved for us,

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Speaker 1: and then they were out in the street and pouring out.

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Speaker 1: So it was a beautiful thing to see. One of

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Speaker 1: the things that I had gone back and forth about

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Speaker 1: was because we've been talking about all of our ailments

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Speaker 1: that have happened between Annie and I, which you know,

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Speaker 1: seems to always happen in clusters. I don't know. We

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Speaker 1: are really connected at me too, You're really connected. I

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Speaker 1: don't know if it's a good thing, but we're connected anyway.

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Speaker 1: But with that, yeah, so I've had a lot of

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Speaker 1: issues with some like pinched nerves and pain in like

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Speaker 1: all these other ways. And yes, y'all, I have actually

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Speaker 1: seen the doctor three different times.

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Speaker 2: Wow, good for you.

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Speaker 1: Thanks. Yeah, still in pain a little bit, but it's okay.

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Speaker 1: We're still we're figuring things out. We're figuring it out.

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Speaker 1: But with that, you know, I was thinking maybe I

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Speaker 1: shouldn't go to these protests because I was not feeling well.

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Speaker 1: It's been a lot painful. I've not been exercising, which

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Speaker 1: is unusual for me, like I love my dance grew

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Speaker 1: and my like like zooma glasses and I I have

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Speaker 1: not gone. So it says a lot for me not

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Speaker 1: to go, because I will try to go no matter what.

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Speaker 1: I would rather do that than even social hangouts. Sorry friends.

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Speaker 1: But with that on top of that, I went back

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Speaker 1: and forth, and a part of the thing is like

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Speaker 1: this could be I will admit an excuse to not

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Speaker 1: go because I don't want to be out with the crowds.

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Speaker 1: Like I was very nervous. I was very very like

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Speaker 1: freaked out, trying to figure out what all to do.

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Speaker 1: The anxiety like I got to park somewhere, Where do

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Speaker 1: I park? Where? How can I leave? What happens here

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Speaker 1: if we do get like arrested, What do I need

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Speaker 1: to do? My partner's not here, who's my emergency contact? All?

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Speaker 1: So so many things are going through my head. And

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Speaker 1: at one point we were I did go, and we

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Speaker 1: were standing in the middle of the crowd. A good

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Speaker 1: friend of mine was next to me, and she knows

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Speaker 1: me very well. She's known me from college. We were listening,

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Speaker 1: it was getting hot and we were heating. It was

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Speaker 1: like very crowded. Obviously we had a good crowd, which

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Speaker 1: was great. At one point though, she turn us to me,

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Speaker 1: she was like, how overstimulated are you? Genuine it was

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Speaker 1: like very much, and that's all I could say. And

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Speaker 1: then the girl in front of me turn around she goes,

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Speaker 1: oh my god, me too. That's kind of like the moment.

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Speaker 1: And then everything went down and people did decide to march.

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Speaker 1: I just physically could not stay in there for much

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Speaker 1: longer because just not being able to move all that

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Speaker 1: has a thing. So but I did go, and there

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Speaker 1: was a lot of things that's crossed my mind in

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Speaker 1: that I can't A lot of part of like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm kind of glad I was not super healthy in

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Speaker 1: that I had an excuse to leave, which made me

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Speaker 1: feel guilty. So we really thought about the fact that, yes,

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Speaker 1: I've become more of an introvert. I wouldn't say I'm

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Speaker 1: a complete introvert, even though in my mind I'm becoming

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Speaker 1: more and more and I would more identify with that

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Speaker 1: than I would say, being an extrovert for sure, but

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Speaker 1: with that, like, how do introverts do in activism? What

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Speaker 1: do the ideas go forward those types of people, because

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Speaker 1: it is it's a struggle in such a different way

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Speaker 1: with people who have anxiety, with people who have OCD,

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Speaker 1: with people who have all these different types of mental

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Speaker 1: health that really just blocked them from the being able

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Speaker 1: to do things, and then in turn that becomes guilt.

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Speaker 1: And of course I needed to find out that there

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Speaker 1: was any articles about that, and there are. There are

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Speaker 1: tons of articles, one specifically from introvert dear dot com,

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Speaker 1: which was fantastic. I was like, all right, well they've

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Speaker 1: gotten me to list and when was talking about the

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Speaker 1: introvert guilt about not hanging out with people, wanting to

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Speaker 1: be social but not being able to do so, feeling

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Speaker 1: like you're hurting people's feelings if you don't do things

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Speaker 1: right or do things immediately, or be a part of something, like,

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Speaker 1: there's so much to that. There's another article which I

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Speaker 1: thought was interesting written by that person, You're Welcome, written

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Speaker 1: by Suzanne Berger, who talks about the fact that it

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Speaker 1: could be also called, specifically with activism, moral distress. And

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, so apparently. A philosopher named Andrew

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Speaker 1: Jameson called it a moral distress. It's this idea that institutional,

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Speaker 1: systemic barriers prevent us from acting with integrity, and so

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Speaker 1: therefore we feel like, oh my god, we feel like

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Speaker 1: if we are the worst people in the world. I

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Speaker 1: don't know, I know, you know, I know you know

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Speaker 1: inverse what I'm talking about, because it's that back and forth,

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Speaker 1: and then the guilt either way of afterwards because I'm

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Speaker 1: so awkward I made that if it worse, I'm so

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Speaker 1: you know, all these things that I'll have that conversation

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Speaker 1: and then like you feel like you have to make

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Speaker 1: excuses with your friends. I can't come out because of

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Speaker 1: these things, which most of the time, again, if I'm

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Speaker 1: making excuses, they're probably true. They are true, they're true,

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Speaker 1: they're true, they're true. But it's it's definitely feeling still

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Speaker 1: guilty that they don't believe you or you're making excuses.

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Speaker 1: And I'll again coming today with this activism on top

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Speaker 1: of the layers of anxiety, being overwhelmed with the news,

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Speaker 1: feeling like you can't do enough, feeling like there's nothing

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Speaker 1: you can do. They're feeling like you're so overwhelmed with

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Speaker 1: all of the bad things, that what you're doing is

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Speaker 1: not enough even if you are doing things. So there's

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Speaker 1: so much to be said in this conversation, and I can't, y'all.

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Speaker 1: It's constantly in the back of my head, and a

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Speaker 1: part like being even more so of an introvert, keeping

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Speaker 1: isolated to myself feels like it's making it worse. And

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Speaker 1: again I will say, so, my partner has been gone

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Speaker 1: for a couple of weeks now having to do things,

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Speaker 1: and it feels weird. And I was just telling Annie

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Speaker 1: before we got on how I've lost all track of

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Speaker 1: space and time because nothing not my normal. I'm putting

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Speaker 1: this in quoes pattern. Daily's routine is now out the

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Speaker 1: window even more so, and so it feels so overwhelming.

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Speaker 1: And I'm just because I feel like even though I

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Speaker 1: was already online chronically online, I am more so now

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Speaker 1: because I have one I don't have the person that

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Speaker 1: I talk to or like, you know, and we talk

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Speaker 1: on the phone all the time, don't get me wrong,

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Speaker 1: but it's still not the same as him coming downstairs

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Speaker 1: or May going upstairs, or us eating together, deciding food

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Speaker 1: or deciding if we need to go out or not,

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Speaker 1: or if we having someone to buy groceries for, because

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Speaker 1: I'm the one who goes out for all that it

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Speaker 1: just is gone kind of right now. So I feel

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Speaker 1: even more like and towards myself, even more introverted. And

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Speaker 1: so as activism and things are going online, and I

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Speaker 1: don't know if it's the timing or again if it's

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Speaker 1: more I have time on my hands of seeing all

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Speaker 1: these kidnappings of immigrants and refugees that we're seeing, all

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Speaker 1: these new laws coming into place, all these new war

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Speaker 1: crimes that are happening, all of these scary assassinations so

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Speaker 1: much that it feels like I, yes, I need to

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Speaker 1: do something, but again, I don't want to be out there.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to talk to people. Talking on the

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Speaker 1: phone sounds like hell. So what can we do? I say,

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Speaker 1: very quietly. There have been people who do talk about

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Speaker 1: this as an issue, and again we're going to introvert

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Speaker 1: Dear dot com who talks about being an activist while

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Speaker 1: being a quiet introvert. And three of the things that

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Speaker 1: they say you can be an activist is participate in

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Speaker 1: the ways that feel best to you, even if that

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Speaker 1: means working behind the scene. And I think that's not

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Speaker 1: said enough about working behind the scene, talking about whether

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Speaker 1: it's helping with funding, which I think is so important.

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Speaker 1: Unfortunately we need they need funding. People need funding to

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Speaker 1: get resources out to talk about governmental stuff. I hate

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Speaker 1: that there can't be changed unless that's happening. Funding things

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Speaker 1: that are being defunded is really important as well. They

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Speaker 1: talked to about like and I love this too, helping

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Speaker 1: to make signs and banners, even if you're not going

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Speaker 1: to assisting others, because unfortunately for me, I have no

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Speaker 1: art talent, but if I did, that would be an

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Speaker 1: amazing way. I really suck at that too. Also bad

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Speaker 1: at puns, which apparently is a thing, and that's the

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Speaker 1: way that but also the way that we can help.

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Speaker 1: We can also talk about so much more when it

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Speaker 1: comes about behind the scenes. I can't even think about

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Speaker 1: it right now because I'm overwhelmed with trying to think

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Speaker 1: about the art signs. There are so many signs any

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Speaker 1: and then talk about no one expressing your boundaries. I

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Speaker 1: think that's maybe where I get uncomfortable that when I

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Speaker 1: try to push my boundaries, I feel even more vulnerable

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Speaker 1: and really really like out of sync over myself, which

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Speaker 1: is something that I need to think about. And then

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Speaker 1: also they talk about don't forget about your creature comforts

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Speaker 1: slash earplugs. That's what I forgot because when something gets

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Speaker 1: really loud and I get over stimulated, I do shut down,

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Speaker 1: which is kind of what happened. And I really because

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Speaker 1: also like when there's other noises because we're outside at a rally,

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Speaker 1: people are talking and jump, you know, pumped up, and

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Speaker 1: we had amazing speakers, and then people would go behind

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Speaker 1: me chanting things that I was like, what's happening And

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Speaker 1: then apparently there was another rally that was happening because

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Speaker 1: they couldn't be in the same rally, so but I

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Speaker 1: could hear both. I should have had an airplex. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know that's probably uh obvious, but I didn't think

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Speaker 1: about that. Also doing things that are sustainable again, doing

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Speaker 1: things that are not going over Like I get so

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Speaker 1: excited with ideas, but then I get very very quickly

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Speaker 1: burned out because it becomes so overwhelming and there feels

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Speaker 1: like it's taking on too much, and I don't ask

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Speaker 1: for help and that becomes a whole other about problem.

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Speaker 1: Focusing on everything focused on what you're doing and what

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Speaker 1: the moment is, and I guess I forget that. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: our job partially is also activism. I forget that often.

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Speaker 2: I do too, But I have to say, in light

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Speaker 2: of my recent health events, I yep, like, oh, this

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Speaker 2: is very stressful about this.

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Speaker 1: It really is. It really is to not be able

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Speaker 1: to disconnect from it. It's really hard being like I

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Speaker 1: literally went through several things. I'm like, Okay, we can

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Speaker 1: talk about this, we can talk about this, we can

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Speaker 1: talk about this. But if we don't we talk about

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Speaker 1: normal day issues. I feel like we're failing the today issues.

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Speaker 1: There's so many issues to be covered, but things like

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Speaker 1: this is important. They also holding. I think we forget

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Speaker 1: too that we one of our jobs, and I hope

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Speaker 1: we do it. We do it well. I hope we

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Speaker 1: do it in consciousness like holding in a safe space.

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Speaker 1: So bringing people who are doing that work in activism

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Speaker 1: already out there, who are known for it to be

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Speaker 1: able to be a part of the show or who

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Speaker 1: are doing activism and any more platform that we're able

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Speaker 1: to give this platform to them. That is a part

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Speaker 1: of the activism, and that is a part of the

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Speaker 1: activism for so many whether it's people just like reposting.

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Speaker 1: I guess that are like really good information, talk about

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Speaker 1: like your rights, immigrants rights and what you need to

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Speaker 1: know about that, protesters rights, what you need to know

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Speaker 1: about that. Groups like thesolidarity dot org funds for different organizations.

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Speaker 1: Those are really important to look at and understand. Trying

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Speaker 1: to weed out the disinformation is also really hard work

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Speaker 1: and important work. There's a lot that we can do,

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Speaker 1: and I think we sometimes ignore that. I ignore that

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Speaker 1: because it gets so overwhelmed at the bigger picture, the

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Speaker 1: louder picture, and feel like I'm failing. But there's definitely

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Speaker 1: a lot to be out there. So to my other introverts,

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Speaker 1: my ambiverts who just get tired and overstimulated, to my

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Speaker 1: anxious peoples, you're doing a great job if only that

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Speaker 1: you are at least acknowledging the disinformation, misinformation as well

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Speaker 1: as the horrendousness of what's happening, and advocating for the

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Speaker 1: people that need you that we need to be advocating for,

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Speaker 1: for our queer people, for our trans people, for our refugees,

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Speaker 1: for those with immigrant parents and those who are immigrants.

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Speaker 1: There's so much out there that we need to talk about. Though,

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Speaker 1: for those who are going through a genocide. There's a

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Speaker 1: lot to have this conversation, whether it's you're boycotting something

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Speaker 1: that is amazing. You're doing great, sweetie, You're doing great,

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Speaker 1: and it does work if we actually do it as

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Speaker 1: a collective. So that's my encouragement, also my whining moment.

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Speaker 1: Also some that advice if you want any of these

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Speaker 1: articles I pulled out about four of them that really

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Speaker 1: are great, and how they tell you to take care

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Speaker 1: of yourself so that you can't help others. And I

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Speaker 1: think again we forget that often when we're depleted and drained,

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Speaker 1: we are no longer of help to anyone. Yep, we're

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Speaker 1: just trying to figure out how to stay at the hospital,

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Speaker 1: aren't we, annie Yo?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, But listeners, I know so many people you can

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Speaker 2: relate to this, and I know we've been talked before

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Speaker 2: about just a general accessibility issues at things like this

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Speaker 2: and why we shouldn't forget that. There are all these

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Speaker 2: other ways to participate. So if you would like to

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Speaker 2: share any of your stories or advice or whatever with

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Speaker 2: us great puns, you can. We would love to hear

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Speaker 2: from you. You can email us that hello at Stuffannever

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Speaker 2: Told You dot com. You can find us on Blue

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Speaker 2: Sky at mom Stuff podcast or on Instagram and TikTok

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Speaker 2: at stuff I Never Told You. We're us on YouTube

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Speaker 2: and we have a book you can get wherever you

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Speaker 2: get your books. Thanks as always too, our superduce Christina,

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Speaker 2: our executive producer and a contributor.

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Speaker 1: Joey, Thank you and thanks to you for listening.

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Speaker 2: Stuff Never Told youstroduction of My Heart Radio. For more

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Speaker 2: podcasts from my Heart Radio, you can check out the

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Speaker 2: Art Radio app Apple Podcast wherever you listen to your

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Speaker 2: favorite shows